1
00:00:50,690 --> 00:00:52,215
Here's a question for you.

2
00:00:52,290 --> 00:00:56,215
What do kids need more?
A father or a dad?

3
00:00:56,530 --> 00:00:57,861
What's the difference?

4
00:00:58,170 --> 00:01:00,696
The way I see it, darn near
anyone can be a father...

5
00:01:01,810 --> 00:01:04,495
but not everyone has the patience
or the devotion to be a dad.

6
00:01:04,850 --> 00:01:05,851
As for me...

7
00:01:05,930 --> 00:01:07,170
Anybody caught a Monarch yet?

8
00:01:07,290 --> 00:01:09,054
I've always wanted to be a dad.

9
00:01:09,130 --> 00:01:11,701
Let me tell you, I love it!

10
00:01:11,770 --> 00:01:12,771
Yeah!

11
00:01:14,210 --> 00:01:15,621
And I love my Ford Flex.

12
00:01:16,130 --> 00:01:18,451
It treats me to a smooth ride,
and you know what?

13
00:01:18,530 --> 00:01:19,816
It didn't break the bank.

14
00:01:20,330 --> 00:01:22,332
Room enough for the whole family.

15
00:01:22,450 --> 00:01:24,657
Yes, I love being a dad.

16
00:01:25,610 --> 00:01:29,171
And I love these two adorable
little rays of sunshine.

17
00:01:31,130 --> 00:01:32,620
Hey, Dylan! Good morning.

18
00:01:32,690 --> 00:01:33,691
Whatever.

19
00:01:34,690 --> 00:01:36,897
Okay. I'm not their real dad.

20
00:01:37,530 --> 00:01:38,656
Good morning, Mr. Whitaker.

21
00:01:38,730 --> 00:01:40,858
- I'm their stepdad.
- Good morning, Megan.

22
00:01:40,930 --> 00:01:42,614
Can you please put this on the fridge?

23
00:01:43,010 --> 00:01:46,810
Well, sure. Did you do
another drawing of our family?

24
00:01:47,090 --> 00:01:48,376
- Uh-huh.
- Huh?

25
00:01:48,450 --> 00:01:51,613
That's me and Dylan and Mommy.

26
00:01:51,810 --> 00:01:52,777
So great.

27
00:01:52,850 --> 00:01:55,899
And over here, far, far away,

28
00:01:56,450 --> 00:01:57,417
is you.

29
00:01:57,490 --> 00:02:00,334
Oh? And am I wearing a baseball cap?

30
00:02:00,650 --> 00:02:04,018
That's the knife in your head
'cause I was killing you in the eye.

31
00:02:04,730 --> 00:02:05,811
Oh, I see.

32
00:02:05,890 --> 00:02:07,494
Well, I love how you drew my hair.

33
00:02:08,170 --> 00:02:09,331
That's poop.

34
00:02:10,010 --> 00:02:12,695
Well, it's well-drawn.
And I'm guessing it's dog poop?

35
00:02:12,890 --> 00:02:14,460
That's homeless man poop.

36
00:02:14,530 --> 00:02:15,531
Oh.

37
00:02:16,770 --> 00:02:17,771
All right.

38
00:02:18,730 --> 00:02:20,892
I actually can't
father my own children,

39
00:02:20,970 --> 00:02:23,655
ever since I hit a little
snafu at a dental office.

40
00:02:24,010 --> 00:02:26,251
I've got
a little bit of a gag reflex.

41
00:02:26,330 --> 00:02:28,139
Uh, close your eyes, breathe through
your nose, you'll be fine.

42
00:02:28,210 --> 00:02:29,371
Oh. Okay.

43
00:02:36,810 --> 00:02:39,700
Oh, you got a really weird tongue.
You need to floss better.

44
00:02:39,850 --> 00:02:41,500
Ever since then,
my testicles have been

45
00:02:41,570 --> 00:02:43,220
more decorative than anything else.

46
00:02:43,290 --> 00:02:44,337
Hey!

47
00:02:44,410 --> 00:02:46,572
And I thought I'd never have a family.

48
00:02:46,890 --> 00:02:50,133
Until I met a stunning mom named Sara.

49
00:02:51,210 --> 00:02:52,575
Would you look at her?

50
00:02:52,810 --> 00:02:55,973
I am one lucky so-and-so.
I hit the jackpot.

51
00:02:56,210 --> 00:02:57,291
- Hi.
- Hi.

52
00:02:57,410 --> 00:02:59,060
Sorry I'm taking so long.

53
00:02:59,130 --> 00:03:01,531
I have to show that Sixty West
building to those new clients.

54
00:03:01,610 --> 00:03:02,611
I know.

55
00:03:02,690 --> 00:03:05,375
- Oh, my God! The kids' lunches.
- Already packed. I wrote them

56
00:03:05,450 --> 00:03:07,817
little inspirational notes
to start them on their day.

57
00:03:07,970 --> 00:03:10,211
They've already eaten their breakfasts,
and you look perfect.

58
00:03:10,730 --> 00:03:12,220
You are amazing.

59
00:03:13,570 --> 00:03:16,096
Look at this, huh?
Another family drawing.

60
00:03:16,170 --> 00:03:18,218
Oh, no. I am so sorry.

61
00:03:18,290 --> 00:03:20,896
No, I think you're misunderstanding.
This is the first drawing

62
00:03:20,970 --> 00:03:23,052
where I'm not dead already.

63
00:03:23,650 --> 00:03:25,539
Sure, I've got a knife in my eye

64
00:03:25,610 --> 00:03:27,339
and some homeless man
poop on my head,

65
00:03:28,050 --> 00:03:30,781
but this is
showing real progress.

66
00:03:30,850 --> 00:03:32,773
I think she's starting to accept me.

67
00:03:32,890 --> 00:03:34,892
You can find the good
in just about anything.

68
00:03:34,970 --> 00:03:37,211
I love that about you. You know that?

69
00:03:37,570 --> 00:03:38,696
Thanks.

70
00:04:26,090 --> 00:04:28,138
Hello. I'm home.

71
00:04:29,490 --> 00:04:30,491
Hey-

72
00:04:30,930 --> 00:04:32,261
How was the, uh...

73
00:04:34,770 --> 00:04:35,771
What's wrong?

74
00:04:35,850 --> 00:04:37,932
He won't talk to me.
He said he only wants to talk to you.

75
00:04:39,730 --> 00:04:40,777
You want to talk to me?

76
00:04:40,850 --> 00:04:42,340
- Really?
- Mmm-hmm.

77
00:04:42,410 --> 00:04:44,174
- You mean me and your mom?
- Mmm-mmm.

78
00:04:44,250 --> 00:04:45,979
- Just me? By myself?
- Mmm-hmm.

79
00:04:46,050 --> 00:04:47,540
Sure. I'm...

80
00:04:48,450 --> 00:04:51,260
I'm totally free. Let's go to the den.
We'll sit there.

81
00:04:51,450 --> 00:04:53,691
We'll sit.
We can do it sitting or standing?

82
00:04:54,290 --> 00:04:55,974
Doesn't matter. We're just gonna do it.

83
00:04:56,290 --> 00:04:59,021
We're not gonna overthink it.
Yeah. Great. Okay, good.

84
00:04:59,810 --> 00:05:04,134
Just the men, yeah.
A little rap session. Great.

85
00:05:04,810 --> 00:05:05,971
on, my God.

86
00:05:07,890 --> 00:05:11,133
I just want you to know that
I'm just here to listen. All right?

87
00:05:11,490 --> 00:05:15,176
No judgments, no lectures,
just a compassionate ear.

88
00:05:16,090 --> 00:05:18,377
- Well, there are these kids at school...
- Mmm-hmm.

89
00:05:18,450 --> 00:05:20,612
and they're bigger than me,
because they're fourth graders.

90
00:05:20,690 --> 00:05:22,533
And...

91
00:05:24,570 --> 00:05:26,015
Oh, was that weird?

92
00:05:26,570 --> 00:05:27,981
I'm sorry, I'm just...

93
00:05:28,490 --> 00:05:31,539
It's a big moment for me,
and I'm just trying to capture it.

94
00:05:31,610 --> 00:05:32,975
It just came off awkward.

95
00:05:33,490 --> 00:05:37,017
So, go ahead, continue telling
your story. Fourth graders.

96
00:05:37,250 --> 00:05:39,252
Anyway, there are
these fourth graders, and...

97
00:05:39,450 --> 00:05:41,054
He actually confided in me.

98
00:05:41,170 --> 00:05:44,413
I mean, it was that father-son feeling
I've been dying for,

99
00:05:44,490 --> 00:05:47,175
and it was even better than
I thought it was gonna be.

100
00:05:47,730 --> 00:05:50,301
I mean,
he really needed me. Me.

101
00:05:50,370 --> 00:05:51,576
That is so great, honey.

102
00:05:51,650 --> 00:05:52,936
He even said not to tell you.

103
00:05:53,010 --> 00:05:56,651
So I'm actually totally betraying
his trust right now.

104
00:05:56,730 --> 00:05:58,937
What are we gonna do about
those little snot-nosed fourth graders?

105
00:05:59,050 --> 00:06:00,495
Oh, I think it's going to be fine.

106
00:06:00,570 --> 00:06:04,097
He's going to try to do some
trust falls on the playground.

107
00:06:04,530 --> 00:06:05,736
Really? You think that's gonna work?

108
00:06:05,890 --> 00:06:08,018
As long as they catch him. Yeah.

109
00:06:08,130 --> 00:06:09,131
Hey, Brad.

110
00:06:09,570 --> 00:06:10,571
Yeah?

111
00:06:10,650 --> 00:06:13,813
If I ask you something, you
promise you won't cry again?

112
00:06:14,130 --> 00:06:15,655
Of course, sweetie. What is it?

113
00:06:15,730 --> 00:06:18,415
Well, at school,
they told us about this thing,

114
00:06:18,570 --> 00:06:20,254
and it's called a Daddy-Daughter Dance.

115
00:06:22,410 --> 00:06:23,900
So, do you want to go with me?

116
00:06:25,490 --> 00:06:27,060
You said you wouldn't cry, Brad.

117
00:06:27,290 --> 00:06:30,976
I'm not. Megan, yes. A million times yes.

118
00:06:31,290 --> 00:06:33,213
I thought big people
weren't supposed to cry.

119
00:06:33,290 --> 00:06:36,055
I think it's sweet that he's
crying like a little bitch.

120
00:06:36,170 --> 00:06:37,456
Megan!

121
00:06:37,530 --> 00:06:39,339
You are not supposed
to call people that word.

122
00:06:39,650 --> 00:06:42,654
You know what? It takes a real
man to show his emotions.

123
00:06:45,810 --> 00:06:47,335
All right, that's a bit much.

124
00:06:47,810 --> 00:06:50,017
No more rhymes now, I mean it!

125
00:06:50,290 --> 00:06:51,530
Anybody want a peanut?

126
00:06:54,490 --> 00:06:57,175
We were finally
becoming a family.

127
00:06:57,650 --> 00:06:58,731
I'll get it!

128
00:06:58,810 --> 00:07:01,654
After being pushed away
and treated like an outsider,

129
00:07:01,850 --> 00:07:04,421
I was finally becoming
the dad that I always knew I could...

130
00:07:04,610 --> 00:07:05,657
Daddy!

131
00:07:06,170 --> 00:07:08,377
Hi! Where are you?

132
00:07:08,850 --> 00:07:10,181
Where's Cameroon?

133
00:07:10,330 --> 00:07:12,332
Is that gunfire? Cool!

134
00:07:12,530 --> 00:07:14,658
Daddy, Daddy!
I want to talk to Daddy.

135
00:07:15,850 --> 00:07:16,851
Hi, Daddy.

136
00:07:17,170 --> 00:07:18,171
Good.

137
00:07:18,370 --> 00:07:20,213
- So your ex is calling, huh?
- Yeah.

138
00:07:20,330 --> 00:07:23,140
What a treat for the kids.
It's been a long time.

139
00:07:23,210 --> 00:07:24,336
- Yeah.
- Yeah.

140
00:07:24,530 --> 00:07:27,534
We're watching a really funny
movie with Mommy and Brad.

141
00:07:28,170 --> 00:07:29,660
Oh, Brad is Mommy's new husband.

142
00:07:30,050 --> 00:07:31,700
Wait. He doesn't know about me?

143
00:07:32,050 --> 00:07:34,530
Well, I haven't talked to him
in six months.

144
00:07:34,850 --> 00:07:36,090
We've been married eight months.

145
00:07:36,170 --> 00:07:37,979
Brad, Daddy wants to talk to you.

146
00:07:38,210 --> 00:07:40,417
- No! No, no. Don't, don't...
- I'm just going to say hi.

147
00:07:40,490 --> 00:07:42,015
You don't need to do that. Brad, don't.

148
00:07:42,090 --> 00:07:43,854
Thank you, sweetie.

149
00:07:44,370 --> 00:07:46,896
Hello, Dusty?
Super to make your acquaintance.

150
00:07:47,690 --> 00:07:49,454
In fact, I just wish
I could shake your hand

151
00:07:49,530 --> 00:07:51,692
and offer to buy you a cold one.

152
00:07:52,370 --> 00:07:53,781
- Tomorrow?
- What?

153
00:07:53,850 --> 00:07:55,978
Daddy's coming! Yay!

154
00:07:56,690 --> 00:07:58,215
Oh, yeah, I guess I could pick you up.

155
00:07:58,650 --> 00:07:59,731
- No.
- Hmm?

156
00:08:00,050 --> 00:08:01,211
It's Whitaker.

157
00:08:01,410 --> 00:08:06,098
W-H-I-T-A-K-E-R.

158
00:08:06,570 --> 00:08:07,651
No, I'm not comfortable giving you

159
00:08:07,730 --> 00:08:09,061
my Social Security number
over the phone.

160
00:08:10,050 --> 00:08:13,611
Uh, okay, yeah, my credit score is 752.

161
00:08:13,690 --> 00:08:14,851
I'm very proud of that.

162
00:08:14,930 --> 00:08:18,377
I'm sorry? What sort of fighting styles
am I proficient in?

163
00:08:19,210 --> 00:08:20,700
I don't know if I've ever been
asked that before.

164
00:08:20,930 --> 00:08:23,137
Hello, Dusty, hello, hello? Hmm...

165
00:08:24,490 --> 00:08:25,616
I lost him.

166
00:08:25,890 --> 00:08:28,052
What just happened?
Did you just invite him to come here?

167
00:08:28,170 --> 00:08:29,740
Is he coming tomorrow?

168
00:08:30,010 --> 00:08:31,535
Well, I didn't know
he'd accept my offer so soon.

169
00:08:31,610 --> 00:08:33,499
I mean, he reallyjumped at it.

170
00:08:33,570 --> 00:08:36,050
Remember when I said
he was like Jesse James

171
00:08:36,130 --> 00:08:37,541
and Mick Jagger had a baby?

172
00:08:37,610 --> 00:08:40,898
Yeah, I just thought maybe
he was really skinny and

173
00:08:41,050 --> 00:08:44,736
jittery, and had like a little bit
of a British accent, or something.

174
00:08:44,810 --> 00:08:47,381
He's wild and he's crazy.
That's why I fell in love with him.

175
00:08:47,650 --> 00:08:48,776
Then you end up with two kids.

176
00:08:48,850 --> 00:08:51,421
And I'm stuck there holding the bag and
he's nowhere to be found.

177
00:08:51,490 --> 00:08:53,333
It doesn't matter how much
love or passion,

178
00:08:53,410 --> 00:08:54,775
or you can't breathe
without each other.

179
00:08:54,890 --> 00:08:56,858
All of that stuff is stupid in comparison.

180
00:08:57,210 --> 00:08:58,655
When you have kids,
you have responsibilities.

181
00:08:58,770 --> 00:08:59,851
He doesn't understand that.

182
00:09:00,090 --> 00:09:01,774
Honey, this is actually a good thing.

183
00:09:01,930 --> 00:09:03,500
I'll welcome Dusty into our home,

184
00:09:03,610 --> 00:09:06,773
and we'll establish some kind
but firm boundaries.

185
00:09:06,930 --> 00:09:09,934
All right? It's what Step-By-Stepdad
calls "setting up a Loving Fence."

186
00:09:10,170 --> 00:09:12,855
A Loving Fence?
Wow, that sounds really great, honey.

187
00:09:13,090 --> 00:09:15,855
But your self-help books
have never met Dusty Mayron.

188
00:09:16,090 --> 00:09:17,535
He sounds like a rascal,

189
00:09:17,610 --> 00:09:19,374
but I don't think
it's anything I can't handle.

190
00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:26,771
Check. Check, check.

191
00:09:26,930 --> 00:09:29,774
Chinese Checkers,
Czech, Czech Republic, pop,

192
00:09:30,050 --> 00:09:33,213
sibilance, sibilance, pop,
one, two, six, seven,

193
00:09:33,450 --> 00:09:35,293
check, check, check, check.

194
00:09:35,530 --> 00:09:36,577
What do you got for me, Brad?

195
00:09:36,810 --> 00:09:40,212
Oh, Mr. Holt, hello. Well, hopefully
the new voice of The Panda.

196
00:09:40,290 --> 00:09:41,371
Oh, listen.

197
00:09:41,530 --> 00:09:44,898
I gotta leave early today. I gotta go
pick up my wife's ex at the airport.

198
00:09:45,130 --> 00:09:48,054
Jesus, kid, how'd you
draw that shit detail?

199
00:09:48,610 --> 00:09:50,692
Brad, why do you want
this deadbeat in your home?

200
00:09:50,810 --> 00:09:53,416
Well, it's not that
I want him in my home,

201
00:09:53,490 --> 00:09:55,970
it's just that the better
stepparenting books

202
00:09:56,050 --> 00:09:58,337
say that the worst thing
you can do for the kids

203
00:09:58,410 --> 00:10:00,253
is to push out the biological.

204
00:10:00,490 --> 00:10:02,970
You're in the danger zone here,
Brad, and let me tell you why.

205
00:10:03,330 --> 00:10:06,891
Kids that grow up without their dads
always end up obsessing over them.

206
00:10:07,290 --> 00:10:09,896
Most of the hook-ups
that I've had in my adult life

207
00:10:09,970 --> 00:10:11,813
have been with women
that had daddy issues.

208
00:10:11,970 --> 00:10:13,699
I don't know if this is
an appropriate story.

209
00:10:13,810 --> 00:10:15,972
Look, my wife would kill me
if she knew I was telling you this.

210
00:10:16,050 --> 00:10:17,700
Well, then you shouldn't tell me this.

211
00:10:17,970 --> 00:10:19,017
When I met her in Denver...

212
00:10:19,090 --> 00:10:20,251
You're going to tell the story, aren't you?

213
00:10:20,330 --> 00:10:21,934
she was a topless maid.

214
00:10:22,010 --> 00:10:23,853
- Ninety-nine bucks an hour.
- Mmm-hmm.

215
00:10:23,930 --> 00:10:27,093
Never met her father.
But who did she meet? Me.

216
00:10:27,490 --> 00:10:30,573
And who did treat her like shit? Me.

217
00:10:30,650 --> 00:10:31,936
I eventually loved her,

218
00:10:32,090 --> 00:10:33,933
but every time she got out of line,

219
00:10:34,010 --> 00:10:36,092
I'd just pull the Humvee over

220
00:10:36,330 --> 00:10:37,695
and ask her to get out politely.

221
00:10:37,810 --> 00:10:39,175
And then I'd drive away.

222
00:10:39,530 --> 00:10:43,535
Guess what?
She showed up at home every time.

223
00:10:43,770 --> 00:10:46,216
This story has no relevance
to my situation.

224
00:10:46,450 --> 00:10:48,771
Oh, it doesn't at all. It's just a good story.

225
00:10:48,930 --> 00:10:50,773
So, Pete, are we going
to hear this guy, or what?

226
00:10:53,610 --> 00:10:56,420
One-oh-three-point-six

227
00:10:56,690 --> 00:10:58,374
The Panda!

228
00:11:01,530 --> 00:11:02,531
I'm sorry.

229
00:11:02,890 --> 00:11:06,895
Keep it up, Brad.
You and I will fight in the parking lot.

230
00:11:08,050 --> 00:11:09,290
So today is the day

231
00:11:09,370 --> 00:11:11,372
I'm finally meeting
the father of my children.

232
00:11:11,730 --> 00:11:14,381
Am I nervous? You're darn right I am.

233
00:11:14,490 --> 00:11:17,221
But who wouldn't be?

234
00:11:17,490 --> 00:11:20,733
And here's the thing.
I mean, Pepe, you know, kids...

235
00:11:20,890 --> 00:11:23,939
they see through things and,
at the end of the day,

236
00:11:24,410 --> 00:11:25,821
they know who's been around...

237
00:11:26,250 --> 00:11:27,615
Holy balls!

238
00:11:32,810 --> 00:11:34,096
I hope that's not him.

239
00:11:51,770 --> 00:11:53,898
There is no doubt this man
is your better in every way.

240
00:11:54,610 --> 00:11:56,772
Well, you're kind to say that. Thank you.

241
00:11:57,450 --> 00:11:59,771
Yeah, I feel pretty good.

242
00:12:02,450 --> 00:12:04,293
- Hey, you Dusty?
- Nope.

243
00:12:04,930 --> 00:12:06,091
What?

244
00:12:06,970 --> 00:12:08,495
Are you sure?

245
00:12:12,450 --> 00:12:14,373
Are you Dusty... No, you're not Dusty.

246
00:12:17,610 --> 00:12:19,453
You've got
Jason Sinclair on The Panda,

247
00:12:19,530 --> 00:12:21,612
the station everybody
in the office can agree on.

248
00:12:21,890 --> 00:12:22,891
What is this?

249
00:12:22,970 --> 00:12:24,051
Now if you're up in Wolf Trap
this weekend,

250
00:12:24,130 --> 00:12:25,620
do yourself a favor and check out...

251
00:12:28,450 --> 00:12:30,657
Hey! Where have you been?

252
00:12:31,330 --> 00:12:32,456
I called you like 100 times.

253
00:12:32,530 --> 00:12:34,453
I know, my phone died. Look...

254
00:12:35,130 --> 00:12:36,131
This motorcycle, is this...

255
00:12:36,290 --> 00:12:37,291
Yes. He's here.

256
00:12:37,410 --> 00:12:38,650
- He's here?
- Yes.

257
00:12:38,730 --> 00:12:40,220
What's he doing inside there?

258
00:12:40,290 --> 00:12:42,258
He's giving the kids
all kinds of Starbursts.

259
00:12:42,570 --> 00:12:44,413
Starbursts? God damn it!

260
00:12:44,650 --> 00:12:47,494
Sorry. Sorry.

261
00:12:47,650 --> 00:12:49,971
I'm a hot habanero pepper right now.

262
00:12:50,250 --> 00:12:53,060
I got a few bullet points I want to
bring up with our friend Dusty,

263
00:12:53,330 --> 00:12:56,698
starting with airport etiquette,
courtesy and expectation.

264
00:12:57,810 --> 00:12:59,255
Oh, good story, Daddy!

265
00:12:59,490 --> 00:13:01,333
You like that story? It's all true. Hey!

266
00:13:01,410 --> 00:13:02,571
Who wants some more Starbursts

267
00:13:02,650 --> 00:13:05,176
and a couple of
uncirculated silver dollars?

268
00:13:05,410 --> 00:13:06,741
So you are Dusty.

269
00:13:22,010 --> 00:13:24,775
I sure am. You must be
the new and improved husband.

270
00:13:24,850 --> 00:13:26,534
Bring it in, big guns.

271
00:13:27,690 --> 00:13:29,180
I already met you at the airport.

272
00:13:29,290 --> 00:13:30,496
No, I don't recall that, friend.

273
00:13:30,610 --> 00:13:32,453
Yeah, I walked right up to you
and asked if you were Dusty.

274
00:13:32,610 --> 00:13:34,692
I'm pretty sure I'd remember
a heavy hitter like yourself.

275
00:13:36,010 --> 00:13:37,136
Well, must have been my mistake.

276
00:13:37,850 --> 00:13:39,340
All right, that was me at the airport.

277
00:13:39,410 --> 00:13:40,980
- Yeah, I know that.
- The truth is,

278
00:13:41,050 --> 00:13:42,461
I saw you before you saw me,

279
00:13:42,530 --> 00:13:44,658
and I'm thinking,
"This is the guy who's raising my kids?"

280
00:13:45,050 --> 00:13:47,052
"And damn it if he doesn't
look like the real deal."

281
00:13:47,130 --> 00:13:48,211
I mean, look at you.

282
00:13:48,290 --> 00:13:49,780
You figured it out, didn't you?

283
00:13:49,850 --> 00:13:50,976
You cracked the code.

284
00:13:51,050 --> 00:13:52,381
I don't know about that.

285
00:13:52,610 --> 00:13:53,975
Don't play that humble game with me.

286
00:13:54,770 --> 00:13:57,250
He is so humble. He's just too humble.

287
00:13:57,370 --> 00:14:00,738
Honey, you got it goin' on.
Everybody says so.

288
00:14:00,810 --> 00:14:02,733
Yeah, I got it goin' way on.

289
00:14:03,050 --> 00:14:04,734
So you can understand
why I panicked at the airport.

290
00:14:04,970 --> 00:14:07,211
- I froze, Brad. I'm sorry.
- it's fine.

291
00:14:07,330 --> 00:14:09,332
Look, these are
tricky waters to navigate.

292
00:14:09,650 --> 00:14:11,812
They sure are, man. I mean,
that is insightful.

293
00:14:12,250 --> 00:14:14,651
You know, I thought it was weird Sara
didn't tell me about you before.

294
00:14:14,730 --> 00:14:16,175
I thought, what's she hiding?

295
00:14:16,410 --> 00:14:17,741
And now I know.

296
00:14:18,650 --> 00:14:19,811
A champion.

297
00:14:20,570 --> 00:14:23,255
Hey, Brad!
Did you see Dad's motorcycle?

298
00:14:23,570 --> 00:14:24,731
Isn't it cool?

299
00:14:24,810 --> 00:14:25,811
it sure is.

300
00:14:27,090 --> 00:14:28,740
What is that, an Indian?

301
00:14:28,930 --> 00:14:29,931
Yep.

302
00:14:30,250 --> 00:14:32,776
I believe they're manufactured
in Minneapolis.

303
00:14:33,930 --> 00:14:36,092
I've never been, but that's

304
00:14:36,170 --> 00:14:37,774
the setting for
The Mary Tyler Moore Show.

305
00:14:38,090 --> 00:14:40,616
And... What's the other... Rhoda.

306
00:14:40,930 --> 00:14:43,092
Which I want to say was a spin-off.

307
00:14:44,250 --> 00:14:47,174
Damn! You really know
your bikes, Brad. You ride?

308
00:14:47,250 --> 00:14:48,251
Uh-huh. Yeah!

309
00:14:48,610 --> 00:14:49,611
- Really?
- Yeah.

310
00:14:49,850 --> 00:14:52,296
I mean, not anymore. I did, you know,

311
00:14:52,410 --> 00:14:55,698
back in college. I had a, um...

312
00:14:55,770 --> 00:14:58,296
I had a Kawa-saki? Kawasaki Nine.

313
00:14:58,410 --> 00:14:59,536
Yeah.

314
00:14:59,610 --> 00:15:03,535
With the fenders and the...
The broil joint. So...

315
00:15:03,610 --> 00:15:04,771
Well, you should get on her, man.
Come on!

316
00:15:04,890 --> 00:15:06,221
Take her out, see what she can do.

317
00:15:06,290 --> 00:15:07,257
She's got a lot of power.

318
00:15:07,330 --> 00:15:08,491
Oh, no, no, no.

319
00:15:08,570 --> 00:15:10,174
Yeah, Brad! Brad... Please!

320
00:15:10,250 --> 00:15:12,332
No. Hey, come on, kids.
It's time for bed.

321
00:15:12,490 --> 00:15:14,219
It's way past your bedtime.
Let's brush your teeth.

322
00:15:14,290 --> 00:15:16,611
All right, come on, guys,
listen to your mom. Hey, look...

323
00:15:16,730 --> 00:15:18,971
I don't want to overstep, but

324
00:15:19,370 --> 00:15:22,374
it would mean the world to me
if I could tuck in our two little blessings.

325
00:15:23,290 --> 00:15:27,693
Yeah. Yeah, sure, of course.
They're your kids. Tuck away.

326
00:15:27,890 --> 00:15:29,494
Oh, thank you for that, Brad.

327
00:15:31,330 --> 00:15:34,652
The King messed up.
He messed up bad.

328
00:15:34,970 --> 00:15:37,416
He thought he could just
ride off to slay dragons,

329
00:15:37,490 --> 00:15:39,970
and his Queen would always be
waiting for him.

330
00:15:40,250 --> 00:15:42,093
And then one day
the King received word

331
00:15:42,170 --> 00:15:44,013
that his dominion was being ruled over

332
00:15:44,170 --> 00:15:46,332
by some curly-headed Step King
with good credit?

333
00:15:46,410 --> 00:15:47,491
Oh, no!

334
00:15:47,570 --> 00:15:49,254
Well, the King rode hard
up on his lands,

335
00:15:49,330 --> 00:15:50,741
and when he arrived,

336
00:15:51,010 --> 00:15:54,492
he did gaze fondly upon the Queen,
remembering their good times together,

337
00:15:54,610 --> 00:15:57,454
for he had known her in her prime,
when she was down for anything,

338
00:15:57,530 --> 00:15:58,975
and I do mean anything.

339
00:15:59,050 --> 00:16:00,051
Psst...

340
00:16:00,250 --> 00:16:03,220
Sounds like your dad's spinning
quite a yarn. Mind if I listen in?

341
00:16:03,290 --> 00:16:05,861
Oh, actually, it's getting late.
You two need to get some sack time.

342
00:16:05,930 --> 00:16:07,853
No, we want more story, please!

343
00:16:07,930 --> 00:16:11,776
Hey, I'd love to be in here all night,
but let's be respectful of Brad's rules,

344
00:16:11,850 --> 00:16:13,852
no matter how arbitrary they seem.
All right?

345
00:16:14,290 --> 00:16:16,292
Good night, my little golden treasures.

346
00:16:19,930 --> 00:16:22,615
Good night, my little magical cherubs.

347
00:16:22,850 --> 00:16:24,773
Here comes some butterfly kisses.

348
00:16:24,850 --> 00:16:26,420
And some Eskimo kisses.

349
00:16:26,690 --> 00:16:29,614
Good night, buddy.
Sleep tight. Sleep tight.

350
00:16:29,850 --> 00:16:31,295
Hey, who wants good-night tickles?

351
00:16:31,370 --> 00:16:32,735
Me!

352
00:16:32,890 --> 00:16:34,938
Good night, my little breath of God.

353
00:16:35,450 --> 00:16:36,975
Good night, my little Jesus teardrop.

354
00:16:37,050 --> 00:16:40,975
I almost forgot, my famous
good-night back scratches.

355
00:16:41,050 --> 00:16:43,132
Oh, so relaxing, so relaxing.

356
00:16:43,210 --> 00:16:44,291
Good night, sweetie bear.

357
00:16:44,370 --> 00:16:46,099
Hey, who wants twenty bucks?

358
00:16:46,170 --> 00:16:47,854
- I do! Me!
- Twenty dollars?

359
00:16:47,930 --> 00:16:49,534
- What?
- Oh, yeah.

360
00:16:49,610 --> 00:16:51,692
One for you, and one for you.

361
00:16:51,770 --> 00:16:52,817
I don't know if that's appropriate.

362
00:16:52,890 --> 00:16:53,891
Ah, don't worry about it.

363
00:16:53,970 --> 00:16:55,051
Okay. Good night.

364
00:16:56,890 --> 00:17:00,053
So, uh, if you want to, why don't you
come by tomorrow after school?

365
00:17:00,210 --> 00:17:01,257
Might be a good time to...

366
00:17:01,330 --> 00:17:02,411
What about the cold one?

367
00:17:02,490 --> 00:17:03,491
The cold one?

368
00:17:03,570 --> 00:17:05,652
You promised me
a cold one and a handshake.

369
00:17:05,730 --> 00:17:07,573
Cold one. One cold one, coming up.

370
00:17:07,650 --> 00:17:09,334
Great. I'll grab my jacket,
we'll go outside.

371
00:17:09,410 --> 00:17:10,650
Perfect. All right.

372
00:17:11,570 --> 00:17:12,571
Hey! Psst...

373
00:17:12,730 --> 00:17:15,415
What are you doing?
What are you guys buddies now?

374
00:17:15,490 --> 00:17:18,016
No. I mean, I offered him a cold one.

375
00:17:18,090 --> 00:17:20,252
I really should honor
the cold one promise.

376
00:17:20,570 --> 00:17:23,972
Fine. You give him a cold one,
and then you get rid of him, okay?

377
00:17:24,250 --> 00:17:25,297
You put up your Loving Fence,

378
00:17:25,370 --> 00:17:26,371
- remember?
- Mmm-hmm.

379
00:17:26,450 --> 00:17:28,134
- Then you come to bed.
- Okay.

380
00:17:29,090 --> 00:17:30,251
- Will do.
- Okay.

381
00:17:34,010 --> 00:17:35,535
What you got
going on over here?

382
00:17:35,770 --> 00:17:39,616
Oh, uh, that's a treehouse. A little, uh,

383
00:17:40,290 --> 00:17:43,294
bonding project for Dylan and I.

384
00:17:43,610 --> 00:17:45,851
Yeah, we've been at it
for about two months.

385
00:17:46,130 --> 00:17:47,131
It's looking good.

386
00:17:47,290 --> 00:17:48,291
Thank you.

387
00:17:48,530 --> 00:17:52,501
So, Dusty, how long do you think
you're going to be in town for?

388
00:17:53,210 --> 00:17:56,259
Well, Brad, the truth is,
I'm wheels-up a week from tomorrow.

389
00:17:56,330 --> 00:17:58,571
Time to get out there and
kick some ass for America.

390
00:17:58,690 --> 00:18:00,977
Oh, I see. So you're a soldier?

391
00:18:01,130 --> 00:18:02,131
Nope.

392
00:18:02,450 --> 00:18:03,531
Oh, so you're a, uh...

393
00:18:03,730 --> 00:18:04,811
Yep.

394
00:18:05,370 --> 00:18:06,735
Yep, what?

395
00:18:06,970 --> 00:18:08,734
You don't want to know
any more than that, Brad.

396
00:18:09,730 --> 00:18:10,731
Okay.

397
00:18:12,290 --> 00:18:16,978
Um, listen, Dusty, I think that we should
set up a visitation schedule.

398
00:18:17,050 --> 00:18:20,691
Right? That way, you feel like
you have ample time with the children...

399
00:18:20,770 --> 00:18:22,340
Why don't we cut the shit, Brad?

400
00:18:23,810 --> 00:18:25,812
No, we don't have to cut the shit.

401
00:18:26,170 --> 00:18:28,776
You want to know what I'm doing here,
why don't you quit looking at

402
00:18:28,850 --> 00:18:30,340
whatever you wrote on your hand?

403
00:18:30,650 --> 00:18:33,494
Be a man and ask me, Brad.

404
00:18:33,810 --> 00:18:36,017
Okay. What are you doing here?

405
00:18:36,330 --> 00:18:39,652
Now, we both know kids need
a single primary male role model.

406
00:18:40,010 --> 00:18:41,853
Sara's made her choice.

407
00:18:42,330 --> 00:18:44,412
I'm man enough to
let that role model be you.

408
00:18:45,050 --> 00:18:47,018
I will vouch for you with my children.

409
00:18:47,410 --> 00:18:50,175
I will give them my sacred
permission to trust you.

410
00:18:50,610 --> 00:18:52,021
To love you and to

411
00:18:53,210 --> 00:18:54,541
call you Dad.

412
00:18:55,050 --> 00:18:56,051
You'd do that for me?

413
00:18:56,210 --> 00:18:57,211
No.

414
00:18:58,170 --> 00:18:59,854
But I will do it for them.

415
00:19:00,570 --> 00:19:02,732
That is what you want, isn't it, Brad?

416
00:19:03,250 --> 00:19:05,252
More than anything in the world.

417
00:19:06,250 --> 00:19:09,220
He played you.
You just got so played out there.

418
00:19:09,410 --> 00:19:11,299
I know it looks that way,

419
00:19:11,370 --> 00:19:13,293
'cause I promised
I would ask him to leave,

420
00:19:13,370 --> 00:19:16,852
and then I invited him to stay for a week,
but he didn't play me.

421
00:19:17,010 --> 00:19:19,331
You know what he did? He cut the shit.

422
00:19:19,450 --> 00:19:21,134
- Oh, he did?
- And I gotta say,

423
00:19:21,250 --> 00:19:22,775
it was refreshing.

424
00:19:22,850 --> 00:19:26,218
I think more of us could stand
to just cut the shit, you know.

425
00:19:26,370 --> 00:19:28,134
- Right.
- In one conversation,

426
00:19:28,330 --> 00:19:30,731
he just blew by
eight chapters in my stepdad book.

427
00:19:30,890 --> 00:19:33,131
I mean, this is gonna be so good
for me and the kids.

428
00:19:33,210 --> 00:19:36,214
Oh, baby, you have no idea
who you're dancing with.

429
00:19:36,570 --> 00:19:37,731
Dusty gets into your head,

430
00:19:37,810 --> 00:19:38,891
that's what he does.

431
00:19:38,970 --> 00:19:41,814
He has a very impressive,
rugged bravado,

432
00:19:41,890 --> 00:19:44,973
there's no question. But I gotta say,

433
00:19:45,050 --> 00:19:49,294
I think in here, there's
a soft, soft creamy center.

434
00:19:49,650 --> 00:19:51,812
You know? I think he feels a lot.

435
00:19:51,890 --> 00:19:55,053
He just... He needs
someone with this, a big ear.

436
00:19:55,250 --> 00:19:56,740
And I got them. Mmm.

437
00:20:01,410 --> 00:20:03,014
Oh, good morning, Dusty.

438
00:20:03,090 --> 00:20:04,501
- Hey.
- You're up and at 'em.

439
00:20:04,570 --> 00:20:05,651
Yeah, I got up early

440
00:20:05,770 --> 00:20:06,851
- and did a quick 20.
- Really?

441
00:20:06,930 --> 00:20:08,694
- Twenty minutes of what?
- Oh, twenty miles.

442
00:20:09,090 --> 00:20:10,455
Did a little light sparring,
then lwhipped up

443
00:20:10,530 --> 00:20:12,294
a pan of piping-hot
cinnamon rolls for my family.

444
00:20:12,850 --> 00:20:13,976
And I made one for you, too.

445
00:20:14,250 --> 00:20:16,821
Wow. That's very impressive, thank you.

446
00:20:17,290 --> 00:20:19,497
- Good morning, gang!
- Ooh, it smells yummy!

447
00:20:19,730 --> 00:20:22,574
Our real dad's a super,
super-duper good cook!

448
00:20:22,770 --> 00:20:24,215
- Mmm-hmm.
- Here you go, guys.

449
00:20:24,490 --> 00:20:27,573
Yeah, it looks an awful lot
like Cinnabon.

450
00:20:27,650 --> 00:20:29,573
Well, thank you, Brad.
What a nice thing to say.

451
00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:32,494
Mmm, it tastes exactly like Cinnabon!

452
00:20:32,570 --> 00:20:35,255
In fact, same shape,
same swirl, same frosting.

453
00:20:35,330 --> 00:20:36,411
Well, now you're starting to
embarrass me,

454
00:20:36,490 --> 00:20:37,776
but I do appreciate the compliment.

455
00:20:38,570 --> 00:20:39,981
Good morning, Sar-bear!

456
00:20:40,370 --> 00:20:42,099
- Morning.
- Hey, listen, guys,

457
00:20:42,170 --> 00:20:44,741
Brad and I had a talk last night
about the importance of family.

458
00:20:44,890 --> 00:20:47,336
And now that everyone's here,
I wanted to say a few words, okay?

459
00:20:47,410 --> 00:20:48,571
I think that would be great.

460
00:20:48,650 --> 00:20:52,416
Hey, kids, you know, families can be
ever-growing and changing things.

461
00:20:52,490 --> 00:20:55,380
And sometimes someone new
knocks on the door of your heart

462
00:20:55,450 --> 00:20:57,771
and you're not sure if you
have room in there for one more.

463
00:20:57,850 --> 00:21:00,535
But there's someone here now
that I hope you guys can learn to love.

464
00:21:00,650 --> 00:21:01,651
Okay?

465
00:21:04,090 --> 00:21:06,172
Come here, boy!

466
00:21:06,290 --> 00:21:07,735
A doggy! Yay!

467
00:21:09,450 --> 00:21:10,611
You brought a dog home?

468
00:21:10,690 --> 00:21:12,055
Yeah. Is that a problem?

469
00:21:12,210 --> 00:21:14,178
I mean, you seemed
really into it while I was teeing it up.

470
00:21:14,250 --> 00:21:15,615
No, I thought you were talking about me.

471
00:21:15,690 --> 00:21:17,613
- Oh, but you're not a dog, Brad.
- No...

472
00:21:17,690 --> 00:21:19,692
Look, last night, when we talked...

473
00:21:19,970 --> 00:21:22,132
Oh, yeah. Well, listen,
that's got to happen organically.

474
00:21:22,250 --> 00:21:23,331
Why can't it happen now?

475
00:21:23,410 --> 00:21:24,457
It just can't.

476
00:21:24,530 --> 00:21:25,577
You're dirty.

477
00:21:25,650 --> 00:21:26,697
Dusty, how old is that thing?

478
00:21:26,810 --> 00:21:28,335
I'd guess him to be around 15.

479
00:21:28,650 --> 00:21:30,493
I mean, I found him this morning,
living in a storm drain.

480
00:21:31,050 --> 00:21:33,098
I named him Tumor,
because of how much he grows on you.

481
00:21:33,170 --> 00:21:35,172
Mommy,
can we keep Tumor, please?

482
00:21:35,250 --> 00:21:36,900
Oh, I'm gonna leave this one up to Brad.

483
00:21:36,970 --> 00:21:38,540
Please, Brad! Please!

484
00:21:39,490 --> 00:21:40,935
Why is he looking at me like that?

485
00:21:41,010 --> 00:21:42,819
He's only looking at me.

486
00:21:42,970 --> 00:21:44,893
Maybe we just get a puppy instead?

487
00:21:44,970 --> 00:21:47,621
A puppy, Brad? What are they
going to learn from a puppy?

488
00:21:47,890 --> 00:21:50,894
An old dog like Tumor here's
been out in the world, man. Living free.

489
00:21:51,130 --> 00:21:53,610
Fighting for survival and seeing things
we can only dream of.

490
00:21:54,010 --> 00:21:55,978
Just look at the wisdom
in those cloudy eyes.

491
00:21:56,250 --> 00:21:58,173
Besides, you know what happens
to old dogs at shelters.

492
00:21:58,250 --> 00:22:00,252
He's gonna have to walk the green mile
as soon as he gets there.

493
00:22:00,330 --> 00:22:02,378
No, Brad, no! Don't kill our dog!

494
00:22:02,450 --> 00:22:03,781
I hate you!

495
00:22:04,610 --> 00:22:06,772
Okay. Okay. Fine.

496
00:22:06,890 --> 00:22:09,894
He can live out his few
remaining weeks with us.

497
00:22:10,170 --> 00:22:11,615
Yay! Thanks, Brad.

498
00:22:11,730 --> 00:22:13,016
I don't hate you anymore.

499
00:22:14,170 --> 00:22:15,217
He's going potty!

500
00:22:15,490 --> 00:22:16,855
Oh, my God.

501
00:22:16,930 --> 00:22:18,580
We'll clean it up. We don't mind.

502
00:22:18,850 --> 00:22:19,976
Look at that.

503
00:22:20,050 --> 00:22:21,540
The dog's already
teaching them responsibility.

504
00:22:21,610 --> 00:22:23,658
Hey, guys, when you got to
pick up the potty, use gloves.

505
00:22:23,730 --> 00:22:25,858
He's definitely got worms in his poo.

506
00:22:34,050 --> 00:22:36,257
Dusty!
Can you please move this thing?

507
00:22:36,370 --> 00:22:37,940
I can't get my car out of the garage.

508
00:22:38,010 --> 00:22:40,058
Hey, Brad, do you mind?
I want to grab a quick shower.

509
00:22:40,130 --> 00:22:42,178
Yeah, sure, no problem.

510
00:22:43,370 --> 00:22:44,496
- Hey, honey.
- Hi, sweetie.

511
00:22:44,610 --> 00:22:45,657
It's blocking everything.

512
00:22:45,730 --> 00:22:48,176
No, I know. I know, don't worry.
We're on top of it.

513
00:22:48,250 --> 00:22:50,571
What are you doing? Brad, I don't...

514
00:22:51,250 --> 00:22:53,457
Hey! Stay away from that, please.

515
00:22:55,130 --> 00:22:56,211
Honey, what are you doing?

516
00:22:58,090 --> 00:23:00,092
I don't know if that's a good idea, Brad.

517
00:23:00,210 --> 00:23:01,257
Dusty!

518
00:23:01,410 --> 00:23:04,095
It's vibrating up into my shoulders.

519
00:23:05,050 --> 00:23:07,052
Hey, it's okay, Brad.
Look, she's a lot of bike, man.

520
00:23:07,250 --> 00:23:09,059
No, I'm good. Why don't you go
back in and take that shower,

521
00:23:09,130 --> 00:23:10,461
so you can get a shirt on?

522
00:23:10,730 --> 00:23:12,414
Oh, you got it.
Hey, you look good on that, man.

523
00:23:12,490 --> 00:23:13,696
Remember, one down, four up.

524
00:23:13,770 --> 00:23:15,579
Dusty, everyone knows it's one down...

525
00:23:17,410 --> 00:23:19,014
Watch out! Watch out! Watch out!

526
00:23:33,290 --> 00:23:34,894
Did Brad just die?

527
00:23:34,970 --> 00:23:38,452
I think we all need to prepare ourselves
for that possibility, pumpkin. Okay?

528
00:23:39,770 --> 00:23:40,771
Brad!

529
00:23:42,810 --> 00:23:43,811
Brad!

530
00:23:48,250 --> 00:23:50,059
Oh, my God.

531
00:23:50,130 --> 00:23:51,211
Brad, are you all right?

532
00:23:51,330 --> 00:23:54,937
No, I'm not all right.
I'm in the wall. I'm scared.

533
00:23:55,010 --> 00:23:56,216
Oh, honey.

534
00:23:56,330 --> 00:23:58,173
Jeez, Brad, I thought you said
you could ride.

535
00:23:58,370 --> 00:24:00,452
I can ride, okay.
Would you get a shirt on?

536
00:24:00,530 --> 00:24:01,736
I think if you could ride,

537
00:24:01,810 --> 00:24:03,539
you wouldn't be stuck
in a wall right now, Brad.

538
00:24:03,610 --> 00:24:05,692
Yeah.
I'm sorry to say it, but he's right.

539
00:24:05,770 --> 00:24:06,896
You almost killed the kids!

540
00:24:07,010 --> 00:24:08,614
Let's not beat up
on Brad here. Okay?

541
00:24:08,690 --> 00:24:09,896
He was showboating
for the kids a little bit,

542
00:24:10,010 --> 00:24:11,091
and things got out of hand.

543
00:24:11,170 --> 00:24:13,332
Let's all just be grateful
nobody got hurt. Okay?

544
00:24:13,610 --> 00:24:14,691
I got hurt!

545
00:24:14,810 --> 00:24:16,494
Okay, kids, listen up.
This is a good lesson

546
00:24:16,610 --> 00:24:19,341
on why you never wanna lie
about your ability to do things

547
00:24:19,450 --> 00:24:21,498
you clearly can't do, okay, huh?

548
00:24:21,970 --> 00:24:23,779
I think my arm is stuck in the wall.

549
00:24:23,850 --> 00:24:25,261
Brad, just stay still.
I'll get you out.

550
00:24:25,330 --> 00:24:27,332
No,no,no,no, no.
No, don't do anything.

551
00:24:27,490 --> 00:24:29,777
And would you please
just go and get a shirt on?

552
00:24:29,850 --> 00:24:31,534
Just calm down, all right?

553
00:24:37,170 --> 00:24:39,332
Hey, I'm really sorry about
what happened to your car.

554
00:24:39,530 --> 00:24:41,498
Yeah, and I'm sorry about
what happened to your bike.

555
00:24:41,570 --> 00:24:43,572
Oh, no damage. Not a scratch.

556
00:24:43,850 --> 00:24:45,693
- Oh, not even one scratch?
- Unbelievable.

557
00:24:46,090 --> 00:24:47,535
That's so good.

558
00:24:54,010 --> 00:24:55,933
Let's keep it going! Inside the cones!

559
00:24:56,010 --> 00:24:57,500
Just like ice cream!

560
00:24:57,730 --> 00:24:58,936
Morning, Jerry.

561
00:24:59,010 --> 00:25:01,092
Got to keep it inside the cones!

562
00:25:01,170 --> 00:25:03,855
No, Daddy! You're supposed
to stay in the cones!

563
00:25:03,930 --> 00:25:06,171
Whoa, whoa! Inside the cones!

564
00:25:06,410 --> 00:25:08,060
Inside. Bring her in. That's better.

565
00:25:08,130 --> 00:25:10,815
Let's keep those kids safe today, okay?
Thank you, Brad.

566
00:25:10,890 --> 00:25:12,221
Sorry, Doris.

567
00:25:14,410 --> 00:25:16,811
It's okay. This whole drop-off line thing

568
00:25:16,890 --> 00:25:18,335
can be a bit overwhelming
if you're not used to it.

569
00:25:18,410 --> 00:25:20,731
Yeah, well, I've landed a chopper
in the middle of a Cuban prison riot,

570
00:25:20,810 --> 00:25:22,494
Brad, I think I'm good.

571
00:25:23,730 --> 00:25:27,337
Bye, guys! I love you guys so much.
Have a great day, okay?

572
00:25:27,410 --> 00:25:29,094
- Bye, Daddy!
- Make sure you do all your work.

573
00:25:29,210 --> 00:25:30,575
Bye, guys. Have the best day.
I love you so...

574
00:25:34,090 --> 00:25:35,330
Here's the exciting thing.

575
00:25:35,410 --> 00:25:39,460
We just opened up in our 68th market,
making The Panda America's

576
00:25:39,530 --> 00:25:41,737
number three smooth jazz station.

577
00:25:42,090 --> 00:25:43,251
Wow.

578
00:25:44,090 --> 00:25:47,412
And here it is. My, uh... My little nook.

579
00:25:48,250 --> 00:25:52,096
Wow. Oh, man, I gotta admit,
this is more than I expected.

580
00:25:52,450 --> 00:25:53,611
Wow.

581
00:25:54,770 --> 00:25:56,010
I kind of envy you, Brad.

582
00:25:56,090 --> 00:25:57,251
Oh, stop it.

583
00:25:57,530 --> 00:26:01,057
Ah, it's true. I mean, you're a nice guy,
making a comfortable living,

584
00:26:01,130 --> 00:26:03,337
and the most fantastic woman
in the world loves you dearly.

585
00:26:03,410 --> 00:26:04,855
Really? Thanks for saying that.

586
00:26:04,970 --> 00:26:09,294
I mean it. And that sacrifice
she's making for you... That's true love.

587
00:26:09,490 --> 00:26:10,491
Sacrifice?

588
00:26:10,650 --> 00:26:11,697
Well, sure, Brad.

589
00:26:11,770 --> 00:26:13,340
You know how bad
that girl wants another baby.

590
00:26:14,970 --> 00:26:16,415
She wants another baby?

591
00:26:16,490 --> 00:26:17,901
For her to let that slip away

592
00:26:17,970 --> 00:26:20,860
and marry a man she knew to be barren,
that's true love.

593
00:26:21,850 --> 00:26:23,614
How do you know that I can't...

594
00:26:23,730 --> 00:26:24,891
- Bradley.
- Yes.

595
00:26:24,970 --> 00:26:27,052
Caroline says we're gonna hear some
new voice talent this a.m.?

596
00:26:27,130 --> 00:26:28,973
Yes, sir, in about 15 minutes.

597
00:26:29,050 --> 00:26:30,131
Okay. How'd it go

598
00:26:30,210 --> 00:26:32,781
- with the shitbag ex-husband?
- Uh-uh.

599
00:26:32,850 --> 00:26:35,581
You whip his ass with
that Loving Fence of yours?

600
00:26:35,810 --> 00:26:38,097
Well,
actually it's interesting, Mr. Holt,

601
00:26:38,170 --> 00:26:40,821
because I want you to
meet Dusty Mayron.

602
00:26:41,250 --> 00:26:45,016
Jesus in the morning.
She was married to him first?

603
00:26:45,770 --> 00:26:48,171
Okay. Let's establish some
ground rules, pretty boy.

604
00:26:48,250 --> 00:26:49,376
- Airborne?
- Huh?

605
00:26:49,490 --> 00:26:52,141
Well, your lapel pin.
101st, that's one hell of a division, sir.

606
00:26:52,210 --> 00:26:54,611
Oh, well, thank you, Dusty.

607
00:26:54,810 --> 00:26:55,811
Are you Airborne?

608
00:26:55,930 --> 00:26:57,694
Oh, no, sir, I'm afraid
I don't share that honor,

609
00:26:57,770 --> 00:27:00,057
but I'm humbled to be in the
presence of anyone who does.

610
00:27:00,130 --> 00:27:02,656
Airborne Division?
Those guys love to fly.

611
00:27:03,730 --> 00:27:04,970
Very nice to meet you, sir.

612
00:27:05,050 --> 00:27:07,052
Thank you, thank you.
It's good to meet you.

613
00:27:07,130 --> 00:27:08,177
My pleasure. It's an honor.

614
00:27:08,250 --> 00:27:10,014
Fast friends over there.

615
00:27:10,690 --> 00:27:12,021
That's wonderful.

616
00:27:12,290 --> 00:27:13,496
Come on! No way!

617
00:27:13,850 --> 00:27:16,012
The whole time you're running guns
for the freedom fighters

618
00:27:16,090 --> 00:27:17,774
right under the cartel's noses,

619
00:27:17,850 --> 00:27:19,659
and they never suspected
it was you once?

620
00:27:19,810 --> 00:27:22,381
Well, I'm sure they started to suspect
once they were in a ball of fire

621
00:27:22,450 --> 00:27:23,975
the size of four city blocks.

622
00:27:25,650 --> 00:27:27,618
That's great. I love that!

623
00:27:27,690 --> 00:27:29,180
Holy buckets, Brad!

624
00:27:29,250 --> 00:27:31,776
If this guy was my wife's ex,
I'd put a bullet in my skull.

625
00:27:33,170 --> 00:27:34,456
Come on, Leo, cut it out.

626
00:27:34,530 --> 00:27:37,101
Oh, uh... Sir, I think Barry's ready.

627
00:27:37,170 --> 00:27:38,456
You're really going to like this guy.

628
00:27:38,530 --> 00:27:40,771
Okay. Ready to listen.

629
00:27:43,890 --> 00:27:46,541
One-oh-three-point-six

630
00:27:46,890 --> 00:27:48,892
The Panda!

631
00:27:51,210 --> 00:27:52,780
All right. Mmm-hmm.

632
00:27:54,170 --> 00:27:55,581
- You like him, Brad?
- I do.

633
00:27:55,890 --> 00:28:00,214
I do. I mean, I think his voice
has a warm dependability

634
00:28:00,570 --> 00:28:03,221
that all Panda listeners could trust.

635
00:28:03,890 --> 00:28:04,937
What do you think, Duster?

636
00:28:06,290 --> 00:28:08,099
Does Dusty now work for The Panda?

637
00:28:08,210 --> 00:28:09,974
Yeah, Brad's right.

638
00:28:10,050 --> 00:28:12,178
I'm not really into smooth jazz.
I shouldn't comment.

639
00:28:12,290 --> 00:28:14,452
Nobody's into smooth jazz.

640
00:28:14,570 --> 00:28:15,776
I'm into smooth jazz.

641
00:28:15,890 --> 00:28:17,051
Of course you are, Brad.

642
00:28:17,530 --> 00:28:18,736
So what do you think, Dusty?

643
00:28:19,050 --> 00:28:20,654
I mean, it just seems a little flaccid.

644
00:28:20,730 --> 00:28:22,016
You know, I think you need a voice with

645
00:28:22,090 --> 00:28:23,854
some virility and hope,
that tells listeners,

646
00:28:23,930 --> 00:28:27,093
"Hey! Maybe the next song
won't suck as bad as the last one."

647
00:28:27,370 --> 00:28:29,372
Also, I think a strong ability
to be something like...

648
00:28:29,450 --> 00:28:32,420
One-oh-three-point-six

649
00:28:32,490 --> 00:28:34,857
The Panda!

650
00:28:38,130 --> 00:28:39,131
What...

651
00:28:39,610 --> 00:28:41,612
What just happened?

652
00:28:42,610 --> 00:28:44,931
He sang the tagline.

653
00:28:45,330 --> 00:28:46,855
Good boy, Tumor!

654
00:28:47,610 --> 00:28:48,941
Daddy!

655
00:28:49,090 --> 00:28:50,171
Hey!

656
00:28:51,090 --> 00:28:52,615
Oh, perfect timing. Listen to this.

657
00:28:52,810 --> 00:28:54,574
One-oh-three-point-six

658
00:28:54,650 --> 00:28:56,698
The Panda!

659
00:28:56,930 --> 00:28:58,170
- Is that you?
- Yeah!

660
00:28:58,250 --> 00:28:59,456
That's you?

661
00:29:00,290 --> 00:29:01,940
Why is that him?

662
00:29:02,130 --> 00:29:05,532
I took him to work, and 15 minutes later
he's the new voice of The Panda.

663
00:29:05,610 --> 00:29:08,614
Hey, you believe that? I record
one take at 9:30 this morning,

664
00:29:08,770 --> 00:29:10,101
it's already run 11 times.

665
00:29:10,210 --> 00:29:12,212
Do I really get 182 bucks
every time they play that?

666
00:29:12,290 --> 00:29:13,530
Yes. Every time, yes.

667
00:29:13,650 --> 00:29:14,890
Ooh! Money.

668
00:29:14,970 --> 00:29:17,576
You see why I love America
even more than most people do?

669
00:29:18,130 --> 00:29:19,495
Hey. What's this?

670
00:29:19,570 --> 00:29:21,254
Just the handyman
I hired off Angie's List.

671
00:29:21,330 --> 00:29:23,139
He's upstairs fixing the damage.

672
00:29:23,770 --> 00:29:25,738
Your wife had to hire a man? For what?

673
00:29:25,810 --> 00:29:27,300
Some framing, a little sheetrock repair,

674
00:29:27,370 --> 00:29:28,656
some masonry
and basic window glazing?

675
00:29:28,770 --> 00:29:30,499
Come on, Brad.
We can bang that out tonight.

676
00:29:32,770 --> 00:29:33,817
Yeah.

677
00:29:33,970 --> 00:29:36,132
It's just basic sheetrock glazing

678
00:29:36,210 --> 00:29:38,816
and, you know, little whatamajigs.

679
00:29:39,170 --> 00:29:40,820
Get up there and

680
00:29:42,010 --> 00:29:43,819
get in there and crank it out.

681
00:29:44,090 --> 00:29:45,330
Dusty is pretty good with his hands.

682
00:29:45,410 --> 00:29:47,014
Pretty good with my hands,
Brad, she knows.

683
00:29:48,650 --> 00:29:50,937
Okay. Yeah, I'll just go up there and I'll...

684
00:29:51,010 --> 00:29:53,012
- Want me to do it? I'll tell him to screw.
- No, no, no, no.

685
00:29:53,090 --> 00:29:54,251
No, no, no. That's okay.

686
00:29:54,330 --> 00:29:55,411
I'll tell him,

687
00:29:55,490 --> 00:29:56,935
- "Guess what, bub?"
- Tell him the men are here.

688
00:29:57,050 --> 00:29:58,211
I'll say that. I'll say, "The men are here."

689
00:29:58,330 --> 00:30:00,014
- Let's do it.
- I don't want to imply to him

690
00:30:00,130 --> 00:30:02,019
that he's not a man. But I'll just say,

691
00:30:02,290 --> 00:30:04,292
"Hey, the boys are back in town." Right?

692
00:30:10,010 --> 00:30:11,011
Oh, hi.

693
00:30:12,690 --> 00:30:14,897
I'm Brad. Uh... My wife hired you.

694
00:30:14,970 --> 00:30:16,131
Nice to meet you, Brad.

695
00:30:16,210 --> 00:30:19,532
I just came up here to say that you...

696
00:30:21,210 --> 00:30:23,861
That, um, you should have good luck.

697
00:30:24,530 --> 00:30:26,373
Thank you for your wishes of luck.

698
00:30:26,650 --> 00:30:27,856
I'll be downstairs.

699
00:30:29,650 --> 00:30:31,061
Well? What happened?

700
00:30:31,410 --> 00:30:33,014
Oh, you know, I think it's...

701
00:30:33,090 --> 00:30:36,458
He already started,
and I just think it feels wrong.

702
00:30:36,530 --> 00:30:37,736
Why? Because he's black?

703
00:30:37,890 --> 00:30:39,221
No. No, no.

704
00:30:39,570 --> 00:30:40,901
Megan! Dylan!

705
00:30:41,010 --> 00:30:42,614
- What are you doing? Huh?
- Teaching moment.

706
00:30:43,490 --> 00:30:46,653
Guys, what would we call Brad
if he treated someone differently

707
00:30:46,730 --> 00:30:48,539
just because of the color of their skin?

708
00:30:48,610 --> 00:30:51,056
Brad's being racism?

709
00:30:51,130 --> 00:30:53,212
Racist, honey. Brad is a racist.

710
00:30:53,290 --> 00:30:55,054
- Honey.
- No, I mean... But not on purpose.

711
00:30:55,170 --> 00:30:56,501
Is Brad a Klan person?

712
00:30:56,730 --> 00:30:58,778
No.

713
00:30:58,850 --> 00:31:01,581
So I'm a racist if I don't fire someone?

714
00:31:01,650 --> 00:31:02,651
Well, yeah, you are.

715
00:31:02,730 --> 00:31:03,811
Yeah, you are.

716
00:31:06,010 --> 00:31:08,581
Sir, you're taking this all wrong.

717
00:31:08,690 --> 00:31:10,454
Right. So you get one look
at the color of my skin,

718
00:31:10,530 --> 00:31:12,339
and all of a sudden you're
Mr. Do It Yourself, huh?

719
00:31:12,410 --> 00:31:13,855
No, not at all. Please,

720
00:31:13,930 --> 00:31:15,534
allow me to pay you
for your time and travel.

721
00:31:15,610 --> 00:31:18,056
Don't do me any favors, Paula Deen.

722
00:31:19,890 --> 00:31:20,937
I'm not a woman.

723
00:31:21,010 --> 00:31:22,421
You did the right thing.

724
00:31:22,530 --> 00:31:24,339
Boy, it doesn't feel that way.

725
00:31:24,490 --> 00:31:25,776
Let's get cracking.
Where do you keep your tools?

726
00:31:25,850 --> 00:31:28,171
I know where Brad keeps his tools.
In the credenza.

727
00:31:29,090 --> 00:31:30,137
- Yeah.
- You keep your tools

728
00:31:30,210 --> 00:31:31,700
- in the credenza, Brad?
- In the credenza. Mmm-hmm.

729
00:31:31,770 --> 00:31:32,976
Just easier to get to.

730
00:31:33,050 --> 00:31:34,381
- It's convenient.
- Yeah.

731
00:31:36,850 --> 00:31:38,454
This is a tackle box, Brad.
Are we going fishing?

732
00:31:38,530 --> 00:31:40,532
No. Unless you want to go fishing.

733
00:31:40,770 --> 00:31:42,693
What have you got in here?

734
00:31:42,770 --> 00:31:45,057
A hammer, masking tape,
three C batteries and

735
00:31:45,130 --> 00:31:46,131
a tampon.

736
00:31:46,250 --> 00:31:47,251
Yeah, well, a tampon's handy for...

737
00:31:47,330 --> 00:31:49,059
Yeah, I know what they're handy for.

738
00:31:49,890 --> 00:31:51,221
So are we not going to fix it?

739
00:31:51,290 --> 00:31:52,496
Well, what do you want from me, Brad?

740
00:31:52,570 --> 00:31:53,776
To buy all the gear we need
would cost more

741
00:31:53,850 --> 00:31:56,137
than just hiring someone
off of Angie's List.

742
00:32:02,810 --> 00:32:04,141
And the King, he thought

743
00:32:04,210 --> 00:32:07,020
the Step King seemed okay at first,
a little soft, maybe,

744
00:32:07,090 --> 00:32:09,218
but, heck, the Queen
needed a meal ticket.

745
00:32:09,490 --> 00:32:10,980
But the more the King
learned about him,

746
00:32:11,050 --> 00:32:13,132
the more he doubted the
Step King's ability to lead.

747
00:32:13,410 --> 00:32:16,061
So the King decided
there was only one way to...

748
00:32:16,130 --> 00:32:17,495
Psst... Hey. Good story?

749
00:32:17,570 --> 00:32:19,732
Yeah. The King finally
came back to his castle.

750
00:32:19,850 --> 00:32:22,899
But the evil Step King
wouldn't give him his crown back.

751
00:32:22,970 --> 00:32:26,497
Oh, okay, yeah.
I think I've heard this story before.

752
00:32:26,570 --> 00:32:28,174
Ah, it's a story as old as time, Brad.

753
00:32:28,290 --> 00:32:30,941
Well, you know what? It turns out
the Step King wasn't evil at all.

754
00:32:31,170 --> 00:32:32,296
He was a really good guy.

755
00:32:32,370 --> 00:32:34,452
Fun at parties, great conversationalist,

756
00:32:34,530 --> 00:32:36,498
affable. And he saw

757
00:32:36,570 --> 00:32:39,540
that the beautiful Queen
and perfect Prince and Princess

758
00:32:39,610 --> 00:32:42,932
were all alone, and he came
valiantly to their rescue.

759
00:32:43,090 --> 00:32:44,979
Yeah, but wasn't
the Queen sad because

760
00:32:45,050 --> 00:32:47,178
the Step King couldn't give
her an heir to the throne?

761
00:32:47,250 --> 00:32:48,661
Okay, you know what?
Now this is getting personal.

762
00:32:48,730 --> 00:32:51,620
Hey, Brad, come on.
We're just doing fairy tales here.

763
00:32:52,610 --> 00:32:54,533
All right. Well, the Queen wasn't sad,

764
00:32:55,290 --> 00:32:57,054
just for the record.

765
00:32:57,130 --> 00:32:59,736
The Step King was pretty sure
she was totally cool with it.

766
00:32:59,810 --> 00:33:02,381
Yeah, Brad's right. I'm sure
the Queen was thrilled. Right?

767
00:33:02,850 --> 00:33:04,011
Right?

768
00:33:04,610 --> 00:33:05,691
Yeah.

769
00:33:11,290 --> 00:33:12,451
Honey,

770
00:33:13,690 --> 00:33:15,294
what's the matter?

771
00:33:16,050 --> 00:33:18,018
Are you still sad about
Dusty finding your tampon?

772
00:33:18,090 --> 00:33:20,172
No. No, I mean,

773
00:33:21,130 --> 00:33:23,019
this is a little embarrassing,

774
00:33:23,090 --> 00:33:24,979
but it's just, I was...

775
00:33:26,810 --> 00:33:29,814
ls there any chance
you still want another baby?

776
00:33:30,490 --> 00:33:33,812
Oh, my God.
What, did Dusty say something?

777
00:33:34,810 --> 00:33:36,812
He's just trying to get in your head.

778
00:33:37,050 --> 00:33:38,415
So it's not true then?

779
00:33:42,970 --> 00:33:45,655
Okay. Maybe I did want another baby.

780
00:33:46,410 --> 00:33:48,572
But it's not possible,
given what happened to your...

781
00:33:48,650 --> 00:33:51,540
And I'm not blaming them. I love them.

782
00:33:51,770 --> 00:33:53,340
They are my fuzzy little pals.

783
00:33:53,410 --> 00:33:54,536
You don't have to say that.

784
00:33:54,730 --> 00:33:55,856
They are.

785
00:33:56,410 --> 00:33:59,254
I am 100% happy
with the family that I have.

786
00:34:00,090 --> 00:34:01,580
The only reason I'm putting up with him

787
00:34:01,690 --> 00:34:03,852
is because my kids
are so happy to see him.

788
00:34:03,930 --> 00:34:06,092
And I want them to have
a relationship with their father.

789
00:34:07,850 --> 00:34:09,011
You know what?

790
00:34:09,130 --> 00:34:10,575
I can't wait to see his face

791
00:34:10,650 --> 00:34:13,460
when he figures out
how much you really do for his kids.

792
00:34:14,170 --> 00:34:16,537
Yeah. I mean, I'm

793
00:34:17,530 --> 00:34:20,101
involved. I'm emotionally available.

794
00:34:20,170 --> 00:34:21,296
Yeah, you are.

795
00:34:21,370 --> 00:34:23,020
You are darn right.

796
00:34:23,530 --> 00:34:27,216
It's high time Dusty sees
how a real dad does it.

797
00:34:27,530 --> 00:34:29,214
I am fired up!

798
00:34:30,850 --> 00:34:32,261
Let's get some shut-eye.

799
00:35:27,410 --> 00:35:28,411
Hallelujah!

800
00:35:37,930 --> 00:35:40,456
Hey, dudes! Hey, T.J.!

801
00:35:52,610 --> 00:35:54,180
Brad! Look what Dad did!

802
00:35:54,250 --> 00:35:56,651
He finished the treehouse for you!

803
00:35:56,970 --> 00:35:58,620
Hey, hey! B-man!

804
00:36:00,970 --> 00:36:02,460
No, watch out, B!

805
00:36:04,250 --> 00:36:05,775
Hey, Brad. Sorry about that.

806
00:36:05,850 --> 00:36:06,976
You all right?

807
00:36:07,050 --> 00:36:08,051
Brad, what do you think, man?

808
00:36:08,130 --> 00:36:09,780
Wow. Pretty cool zipline.

809
00:36:09,890 --> 00:36:11,301
You like that, huh? It's military grade.

810
00:36:11,730 --> 00:36:13,220
You built all this today? With my tools?

811
00:36:13,290 --> 00:36:16,055
Oh, no, you can't build a treehouse
with a tampon, Brad.

812
00:36:16,130 --> 00:36:17,734
No, I had a little bit of help.

813
00:36:17,970 --> 00:36:19,893
Yo, Dylan, PS4 is all hooked up.

814
00:36:20,090 --> 00:36:21,899
- Thanks, Uncle Griff.
- No problem, buddy.

815
00:36:22,010 --> 00:36:23,057
Uncle Griff?

816
00:36:23,370 --> 00:36:24,860
Dude, I went out for a beer last night,

817
00:36:24,930 --> 00:36:26,580
and who's tending bar
but our man Griffy?

818
00:36:26,650 --> 00:36:28,652
We get to talking and we just click.
You know what I mean?

819
00:36:28,890 --> 00:36:30,813
He's a great dude, man. He really is.

820
00:36:30,890 --> 00:36:33,131
I know how you feel about him,
but just give him a chance.

821
00:36:33,250 --> 00:36:35,218
All right? He's having
a tough time at home,

822
00:36:35,290 --> 00:36:37,054
and your firing him sure didn't help.

823
00:36:37,250 --> 00:36:38,695
Well, I fired him because you made me!

824
00:36:38,770 --> 00:36:39,851
- I made you?
- Yeah.

825
00:36:39,970 --> 00:36:42,098
Am I in charge around here now?
ls my name on the mortgage?

826
00:36:42,210 --> 00:36:43,655
Last time I checked,
you were the man of the house,

827
00:36:43,730 --> 00:36:45,300
and me and Griffy
were just staying here.

828
00:36:45,370 --> 00:36:47,099
- He's not staying here.
- Because he's black?

829
00:36:47,290 --> 00:36:48,496
No, not because of that.

830
00:36:48,570 --> 00:36:50,652
Look, Griffy helped me
knock this out, all right?

831
00:36:50,770 --> 00:36:52,818
So despite any prejudices
that you may or may not have...

832
00:36:52,930 --> 00:36:54,580
I don't have any prejudices.

833
00:36:54,650 --> 00:36:55,856
I said "may or may not."

834
00:36:55,930 --> 00:36:57,056
- Well, it's may not.
- Well, that's good.

835
00:36:57,130 --> 00:36:58,780
Because that's one of the ones I said.

836
00:36:59,050 --> 00:37:00,620
Hey, kids, come on.
Helmets on the half-pipe.

837
00:37:00,690 --> 00:37:01,851
We got to be safe around here.

838
00:37:01,930 --> 00:37:03,056
Wait, half-pipe?

839
00:37:05,210 --> 00:37:07,258
Look, I know it's taking up
a lot of the yard, but it's gonna make

840
00:37:07,330 --> 00:37:08,775
your house the coolest place
in the neighborhood.

841
00:37:08,890 --> 00:37:10,415
I got a sound system, we got

842
00:37:10,530 --> 00:37:12,180
a couple Go-Pros. That's Corey
from Red Bull over there.

843
00:37:12,250 --> 00:37:13,615
Hey, Corey!

844
00:37:13,890 --> 00:37:15,051
You got a sponsor for my backyard?

845
00:37:15,130 --> 00:37:17,451
Hey, Mr. Mayron! You want next?

846
00:37:17,610 --> 00:37:19,294
Nicholas, please, it's Dusty!

847
00:37:19,610 --> 00:37:21,772
And, yes, I do. Brad, watch this run.

848
00:37:23,730 --> 00:37:26,051
I'm gonna dedicate this run
to my future X-Games champs,

849
00:37:26,130 --> 00:37:28,098
Dylan and Megan. This is for you!

850
00:37:51,610 --> 00:37:54,773
Looks like you picked the
wrong leisure activity, buddy.

851
00:38:04,650 --> 00:38:06,015
Thank you.

852
00:38:06,450 --> 00:38:08,100
- Oh, hey, Sara.
- Hi.

853
00:38:08,170 --> 00:38:09,331
Okay. Who's got next?

854
00:38:09,450 --> 00:38:10,815
I do!

855
00:38:14,330 --> 00:38:15,855
Look!

856
00:38:18,450 --> 00:38:20,657
Some cute little tricks there, Dusty.

857
00:38:22,690 --> 00:38:23,691
Really adorable.

858
00:38:23,970 --> 00:38:24,971
Brad?

859
00:38:25,170 --> 00:38:26,501
Hey, who'd like to see
how we used to do it

860
00:38:26,570 --> 00:38:28,857
back in the empty pools of Encino,

861
00:38:29,130 --> 00:38:31,098
Castaic, Irvine, Long Beach?

862
00:38:31,570 --> 00:38:33,015
Santa Clarita?

863
00:38:34,090 --> 00:38:35,455
Santa Cruz?

864
00:38:36,010 --> 00:38:37,011
Fremont?

865
00:38:37,370 --> 00:38:39,293
Honey, no, please come down.

866
00:38:39,370 --> 00:38:41,850
Oh, I intend to, sister.

867
00:38:42,890 --> 00:38:45,291
Come on, Brad, it hasn't been that long.

868
00:38:45,370 --> 00:38:46,531
Godspeed.

869
00:38:48,930 --> 00:38:50,375
Whoa!

870
00:38:56,370 --> 00:38:58,134
Oh, my God! Brad!

871
00:38:58,210 --> 00:38:59,780
Oh, no, it's best not to touch him.
Wait a second.

872
00:38:59,850 --> 00:39:01,420
What do you mean, don't touch him?
He's in trouble.

873
00:39:01,530 --> 00:39:03,055
Look, I know he's in trouble, okay?

874
00:39:03,170 --> 00:39:04,899
But if there's a problem, who
do you want to be in charge?

875
00:39:05,010 --> 00:39:06,011
YOu?

876
00:39:06,090 --> 00:39:08,092
Okay. All right, guys,
we have an emergency situation.

877
00:39:08,170 --> 00:39:10,411
And what's the first thing we do?
Anybody?

878
00:39:11,010 --> 00:39:12,694
- You! Redhead.
- Call 911.

879
00:39:12,890 --> 00:39:16,212
Close. But wrong.
First thing we do is remain calm.

880
00:39:16,290 --> 00:39:17,337
Yeah, that's good advice.

881
00:39:17,410 --> 00:39:19,811
The 911 operator can't understand you
if you're hysterical, okay?

882
00:39:19,890 --> 00:39:21,938
So let's all take a deep breath.
In for ten...

883
00:39:22,050 --> 00:39:24,132
Are you kidding me right now?
Help him!

884
00:39:24,210 --> 00:39:26,099
Hey, that doesn't sound calm, Sara.

885
00:39:26,170 --> 00:39:28,059
Now, please, call 911
and relate to the dispatcher

886
00:39:28,130 --> 00:39:29,973
- what happened calmly, okay?
- Okay, yes.

887
00:39:30,050 --> 00:39:31,859
Anybody know what we do next?

888
00:39:31,930 --> 00:39:33,170
Check for pulse!

889
00:39:33,250 --> 00:39:35,173
Nice! My star pupil! Come on up here.

890
00:39:35,250 --> 00:39:37,412
All right! Okay, two fingers on the neck,

891
00:39:37,690 --> 00:39:38,816
right below the ear.

892
00:39:38,890 --> 00:39:40,813
- Good. You feel a heartbeat?
- Uh-uh.

893
00:39:41,250 --> 00:39:44,936
Okay, now that means that
Brad here is now clinically... Anybody?

894
00:39:45,130 --> 00:39:46,495
- You, Jean Jacket!
- Dead?

895
00:39:46,650 --> 00:39:48,015
Attaboy, Jean Jacket.
You're a smart kid.

896
00:39:48,090 --> 00:39:49,137
He is dead.

897
00:39:49,210 --> 00:39:51,816
All right, so what do we do?
Come on, we're losing him here.

898
00:39:51,890 --> 00:39:53,460
Give him C.P.R.?

899
00:39:53,730 --> 00:39:56,051
Yes! That's my girl.
Come on up here, sweetie.

900
00:39:56,290 --> 00:39:59,931
All right! All right, lock your fingers like
this and press down hard right here.

901
00:40:00,250 --> 00:40:01,775
Oh, great job, sweetheart.

902
00:40:01,930 --> 00:40:02,897
Dusty, hurry!

903
00:40:02,970 --> 00:40:04,699
Okay, I'm going to go ahead
and take this one.

904
00:40:04,890 --> 00:40:06,130
Okay? Watch closely now.

905
00:40:06,250 --> 00:40:08,093
If you do your
chest compressions properly,

906
00:40:08,170 --> 00:40:10,457
it shouldn't take long. Clear out, guys.

907
00:40:14,610 --> 00:40:16,100
I got him! I got him!

908
00:40:18,970 --> 00:40:21,541
My dad can bring people
back from the dead!

909
00:40:22,970 --> 00:40:25,018
Mr. Whitaker's a zombie!

910
00:40:28,650 --> 00:40:32,496
Look, I'm okay, really.
I just got a little jolt.

911
00:40:32,570 --> 00:40:34,971
You got a little killed
is what you got, Brad.

912
00:40:35,330 --> 00:40:36,980
We thought we lost you.

913
00:40:37,330 --> 00:40:38,695
Okay, I'm sorry.

914
00:40:38,810 --> 00:40:40,812
I just got tired of being
the lame stepdad.

915
00:40:40,930 --> 00:40:42,773
All the kids think he's Superman.

916
00:40:42,970 --> 00:40:44,654
Well, now you know how I felt.

917
00:40:44,970 --> 00:40:46,574
I always had to be the bad guy mom,

918
00:40:46,650 --> 00:40:49,176
giving out the carrots
and the punishments,

919
00:40:49,450 --> 00:40:52,021
and he would breeze in
from God only knows where

920
00:40:52,130 --> 00:40:54,098
and get to be the cool, fun dad.

921
00:40:54,170 --> 00:40:56,138
Honey. Look.

922
00:40:56,490 --> 00:40:57,980
I'll talk to him, okay?

923
00:40:58,050 --> 00:40:59,256
I'll tell him to get his stuff

924
00:40:59,330 --> 00:41:01,537
and get over
to the Red Roof Inn. Pronto.

925
00:41:02,010 --> 00:41:03,011
Great.

926
00:41:06,530 --> 00:41:09,534
Wait. Prince Hans is
actually the bad guy?

927
00:41:09,810 --> 00:41:11,255
Man, I didn't see that coming at all.

928
00:41:11,330 --> 00:41:12,695
He seemed like he really loved Anna.

929
00:41:13,170 --> 00:41:14,251
I hate Prince Hans.

930
00:41:14,370 --> 00:41:15,576
Dusty.

931
00:41:15,810 --> 00:41:17,619
Hey, how you feeling, Sparky?

932
00:41:18,130 --> 00:41:19,814
Sparky. That's hilarious.

933
00:41:19,890 --> 00:41:21,096
Brad, have you seen this movie?

934
00:41:21,210 --> 00:41:22,450
It's unbelievable, man.

935
00:41:22,530 --> 00:41:24,578
There's these two sisters,
one of them has ice powers.

936
00:41:24,690 --> 00:41:26,579
Yeah, I'm familiar with Frozen.

937
00:41:27,490 --> 00:41:29,219
Listen, Dusty, I need to talk to you now.

938
00:41:29,290 --> 00:41:30,337
I can't talk now, Brad.

939
00:41:30,410 --> 00:41:31,536
Just pause the movie!

940
00:41:31,610 --> 00:41:32,975
Can you guys talk out there, please?

941
00:41:33,050 --> 00:41:34,211
Griff, man. You gotta pause it, man.

942
00:41:34,370 --> 00:41:35,610
No! I don't want to ruin the momentum.

943
00:41:35,690 --> 00:41:38,899
He won't... Dude, if another song
comes on, you got to pause it. Okay?

944
00:41:38,970 --> 00:41:40,381
Am I supposed to pause my emotions?

945
00:41:40,450 --> 00:41:41,940
Just pause the song, man.

946
00:41:42,330 --> 00:41:44,139
What's up? What's up?
What's going on, Brad?

947
00:41:44,210 --> 00:41:45,575
- This shouldn't take long.
- Okay, good.

948
00:41:46,010 --> 00:41:48,138
Listen, um, I just think
that you're being here...

949
00:41:48,210 --> 00:41:50,099
Yeah. No problem.

950
00:41:50,170 --> 00:41:51,615
and now there's Griff here,

951
00:41:51,730 --> 00:41:53,175
it's presenting some obstacles...

952
00:41:55,450 --> 00:41:56,656
Stupid helmet!

953
00:41:56,890 --> 00:41:58,016
Honey, what happened?

954
00:41:58,090 --> 00:41:59,455
They pushed me off my bike again!

955
00:41:59,530 --> 00:42:00,941
I'm so sick of it!

956
00:42:06,410 --> 00:42:09,061
I want them dead, Brad. All right?
I want their parents dead.

957
00:42:09,130 --> 00:42:10,336
And if they don't have parents, I want

958
00:42:10,410 --> 00:42:12,333
their primary caregivers dead.
Do you understand me?

959
00:42:12,410 --> 00:42:13,491
- Okay, okay.
- He's okay.

960
00:42:13,570 --> 00:42:16,221
Megan's upstairs playing with him.
I am so pissed about this.

961
00:42:16,290 --> 00:42:17,416
Was it the fourth graders again?

962
00:42:17,490 --> 00:42:19,811
Fourth graders?
What, you knew about this, Brad?

963
00:42:19,890 --> 00:42:22,416
Yeah. Dylan asked to speak
specifically to me about it.

964
00:42:22,530 --> 00:42:23,895
- Really?
- So, we role-played

965
00:42:23,970 --> 00:42:25,415
some conflict resolution dialogue.

966
00:42:25,490 --> 00:42:27,015
Are you being serious right now, Brad?

967
00:42:27,090 --> 00:42:29,536
What you need to be teaching him
is some ass-beating resolution.

968
00:42:29,610 --> 00:42:32,932
Damn straight. You got to
make a statement. Set a tone.

969
00:42:33,010 --> 00:42:35,217
It's kind of
a family matter over here.

970
00:42:35,290 --> 00:42:36,780
No, Dusty and Griff are right.

971
00:42:36,930 --> 00:42:38,614
Those little punks need
their butts whooped.

972
00:42:38,690 --> 00:42:40,021
Hey, you got any Miracle Whip?

973
00:42:40,090 --> 00:42:41,137
Yeah, it's behind the...

974
00:42:41,490 --> 00:42:43,811
Here. Hold on. Let me just get it for you.

975
00:42:44,610 --> 00:42:47,614
Guys, I know we're upset right now,

976
00:42:47,970 --> 00:42:49,699
but here's the thing.

977
00:42:50,250 --> 00:42:51,900
Violence never solved anything.

978
00:42:52,050 --> 00:42:53,097
Hey, check your history books, buddy.

979
00:42:53,170 --> 00:42:54,501
Almost everything is solved by violence.

980
00:42:54,570 --> 00:42:55,935
There are better ways.

981
00:42:56,050 --> 00:42:58,621
Okay. Name one. Besides dialoguing.

982
00:42:58,730 --> 00:43:00,300
- Name one?
- Name one!

983
00:43:00,610 --> 00:43:02,374
- What do you mean, name one?
- You said you could

984
00:43:02,450 --> 00:43:03,781
solve problems with
things other than fighting.

985
00:43:03,850 --> 00:43:04,931
- What are you gonna do?
- I don't know.

986
00:43:05,010 --> 00:43:07,251
Well, you said you knew!
You act like you knew!

987
00:43:07,330 --> 00:43:08,411
- Fine, yes!
- What?

988
00:43:08,490 --> 00:43:10,174
Dancing! Dancing.

989
00:43:13,170 --> 00:43:15,491
Did you... Did you just
say dancing, Brad?

990
00:43:15,570 --> 00:43:19,336
It's very popular in youth culture
to resolve conflict through dancing.

991
00:43:19,530 --> 00:43:21,817
They step up to each other
and get served

992
00:43:21,970 --> 00:43:24,337
by crunking, or popping and locking.

993
00:43:24,410 --> 00:43:26,651
They call each other out,
they take turns,

994
00:43:26,810 --> 00:43:30,531
and it is no less intense
than a classic street brawl.

995
00:43:30,810 --> 00:43:33,859
But, at the end of the day, no one's hurt.

996
00:43:34,210 --> 00:43:36,531
And it's a great aerobic workout.

997
00:43:37,010 --> 00:43:39,900
He's flailing a bit,
but he has a good point.

998
00:43:40,010 --> 00:43:42,217
There's a rich history
of dance battles in film.

999
00:43:42,530 --> 00:43:44,498
- You got Breakin' 1...
- I didn't even think of this.

1000
00:43:44,570 --> 00:43:46,572
Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo.

1001
00:43:46,690 --> 00:43:48,419
One of the rare cases
where the sequel was better

1002
00:43:48,490 --> 00:43:49,776
- than the original.
- Much better.

1003
00:43:49,850 --> 00:43:51,693
You got Step Up, Stomp the Yard.

1004
00:43:51,770 --> 00:43:53,340
He makes a solid point.

1005
00:43:53,730 --> 00:43:56,301
Honey, are you telling us that we
should teach Dylan to dance?

1006
00:43:56,370 --> 00:43:58,452
No, I'm just saying

1007
00:43:58,890 --> 00:44:00,574
that teaching him to fight
isn't the answer.

1008
00:44:00,650 --> 00:44:04,052
Okay, but maybe teaching him
to fight back isn't so bad?

1009
00:44:06,050 --> 00:44:07,336
Okay.

1010
00:44:08,410 --> 00:44:12,256
There we go. Perfect.
That's good, right there.

1011
00:44:13,250 --> 00:44:14,854
Yeah. A lot of protection.

1012
00:44:19,730 --> 00:44:20,970
All right, Dylan. You ready, buddy?

1013
00:44:21,050 --> 00:44:22,415
- I guess.
- Oh, you're ready.

1014
00:44:22,490 --> 00:44:24,618
Brad, Griff. You guys be
the fourth graders.

1015
00:44:24,690 --> 00:44:26,294
- I'll be Dylan.
- Okay.

1016
00:44:26,490 --> 00:44:28,891
All right. Hey, buddy,
the first thing you want to do

1017
00:44:28,970 --> 00:44:30,654
is call out the biggest one.

1018
00:44:30,970 --> 00:44:32,654
Hey! What's the matter?

1019
00:44:32,850 --> 00:44:33,976
You too much of a pussy to take me on

1020
00:44:34,050 --> 00:44:35,654
without your little bitches
to back you up?

1021
00:44:36,250 --> 00:44:39,811
Wow. Okay, yes.
That cut right through me, there.

1022
00:44:39,930 --> 00:44:41,932
I'm filled with inner shame right now.

1023
00:44:42,210 --> 00:44:44,451
Saying to myself,
"Gosh, maybe I'm not behaving

1024
00:44:44,530 --> 00:44:47,613
"100% the way I want to."
Right? Is that same page?

1025
00:44:47,690 --> 00:44:49,977
No. What the kid's gonna think
is, "Now I can beat your ass

1026
00:44:50,050 --> 00:44:52,735
"all on my own." But now
you only got one bully to contend with.

1027
00:44:52,890 --> 00:44:54,574
Now bullies always open up
with some shoving first.

1028
00:44:54,650 --> 00:44:56,493
- Watch. Brad, give me a little shove.
- All right.

1029
00:44:57,650 --> 00:44:58,811
Whoa, I didn't connect there, did I?

1030
00:44:58,930 --> 00:45:00,580
No. It was really close, though.

1031
00:45:01,090 --> 00:45:03,536
See what I did, buddy?
I turned my bodyjust enough

1032
00:45:03,610 --> 00:45:06,136
to let his weight bring him in,
then I came right down Broadway.

1033
00:45:06,210 --> 00:45:07,780
- I'm not gonna hit you.
- Oh.

1034
00:45:07,850 --> 00:45:10,217
- Okay, relax. Okay?
- Mmm-hmm.

1035
00:45:10,290 --> 00:45:11,337
Bam!

1036
00:45:11,410 --> 00:45:12,616
It's called the element of surprise.

1037
00:45:12,730 --> 00:45:14,095
Then you start punking his ass!

1038
00:45:14,210 --> 00:45:16,292
You want some more of that, bitch, huh?
You like that, bitch?

1039
00:45:16,410 --> 00:45:18,139
All right. Do we really
need to use that word?

1040
00:45:18,210 --> 00:45:19,336
- No.
- Honey, yes.

1041
00:45:19,450 --> 00:45:20,975
Unfortunately, we do. I'm sorry.

1042
00:45:21,050 --> 00:45:22,893
You have to make him a bitch.

1043
00:45:23,010 --> 00:45:24,978
It's a fundamental step in
destroying a bully's psyche.

1044
00:45:25,130 --> 00:45:26,461
Now stay down, bitch!

1045
00:45:26,530 --> 00:45:28,020
Then you kick that kid
right in the nuts!

1046
00:45:28,090 --> 00:45:29,137
Kick him in the nuts, Dylan!

1047
00:45:29,290 --> 00:45:30,621
Wait! I thought you were in my gang.

1048
00:45:30,690 --> 00:45:33,011
Yeah, but once Dylan tuned you up,
I switched sides.

1049
00:45:33,130 --> 00:45:34,859
What do you think happens
out there on the playground, Brad?

1050
00:45:34,930 --> 00:45:36,694
All right, now come on, buddy.
It's your turn. All right?

1051
00:45:36,810 --> 00:45:38,096
I'll be the fourth grader.

1052
00:45:38,210 --> 00:45:40,053
Can I just go inside already, please?

1053
00:45:40,130 --> 00:45:42,098
Hey, buddy come on, this is easy.
You can do this.

1054
00:45:42,170 --> 00:45:43,979
I said, no! I don't like this stuff.

1055
00:45:44,090 --> 00:45:46,616
I'll just stay away from them
from now on. Mom?

1056
00:45:46,730 --> 00:45:47,936
Okay, come here, buddy.

1057
00:45:48,010 --> 00:45:49,171
- Come on. It's all right.
- Brad.

1058
00:45:49,290 --> 00:45:50,815
Help me out here. Come on.

1059
00:45:52,370 --> 00:45:53,531
Hey, wait.

1060
00:45:54,370 --> 00:45:56,179
Pal, listen...

1061
00:45:56,450 --> 00:45:58,293
I know what it's like
to be afraid to go to school.

1062
00:45:58,530 --> 00:46:00,180
Okay? When I was your age,

1063
00:46:00,490 --> 00:46:02,857
this group of older kids
started picking on me.

1064
00:46:03,810 --> 00:46:05,892
I ran and I cried
underneath the bleachers.

1065
00:46:05,970 --> 00:46:08,974
They bothered me every day,
because they knew

1066
00:46:09,730 --> 00:46:11,061
I was too afraid to face them.

1067
00:46:11,770 --> 00:46:13,898
Until one day, I'd had enough.

1068
00:46:14,170 --> 00:46:16,332
And I socked Jesse Hubbard
right in the nose.

1069
00:46:16,650 --> 00:46:18,652
Really? And they left you alone?

1070
00:46:19,050 --> 00:46:20,381
Damn right they did.

1071
00:46:24,010 --> 00:46:26,012
Brad. That was good.

1072
00:46:26,570 --> 00:46:30,131
Come here, buddy.
Hey, I'm proud of you. All right?

1073
00:46:30,330 --> 00:46:31,456
Now, look at me. I want you to

1074
00:46:31,530 --> 00:46:32,861
punch them right
in the Adam's apple. Okay?

1075
00:46:32,930 --> 00:46:34,819
I want you to shatter their throat.

1076
00:46:34,890 --> 00:46:36,380
Hold on, hold on.

1077
00:46:37,490 --> 00:46:41,256
I'm sorry. Look, I'm having
a pang of guilt right now.

1078
00:46:41,330 --> 00:46:43,139
Full disclosure. Some of the elements

1079
00:46:43,210 --> 00:46:44,541
of my story weren't exactly true.

1080
00:46:45,410 --> 00:46:47,412
Um, the incessant crying, 100% true.

1081
00:46:47,690 --> 00:46:50,853
The constant bullying, absolutely,
it all happened, but I, uh...

1082
00:46:51,690 --> 00:46:53,818
I've never punched anyone
in my life.

1083
00:46:54,010 --> 00:46:55,216
I could have told you that.

1084
00:46:55,490 --> 00:46:57,857
- Then what did you do?
- Yeah, what did you do?

1085
00:46:58,530 --> 00:47:00,612
Well, nothing at all.
In fact, sixth grade was so rough,

1086
00:47:00,690 --> 00:47:02,374
I changed my name to

1087
00:47:03,050 --> 00:47:04,256
Devin Lacecock.

1088
00:47:04,330 --> 00:47:06,014
Why the hell would you tell him that?

1089
00:47:06,370 --> 00:47:08,372
I pretended to be blind
for an entire school year,

1090
00:47:08,530 --> 00:47:10,214
just to elicit empathy.

1091
00:47:10,690 --> 00:47:12,374
Which was great until

1092
00:47:12,650 --> 00:47:15,893
they found me intently watching
an episode of M*A*S*H.

1093
00:47:16,370 --> 00:47:18,099
In fact, it got so bad,
my parents had to refinance

1094
00:47:18,170 --> 00:47:19,740
our house to put me in private school.

1095
00:47:20,010 --> 00:47:23,219
Let's just do that.
Can I go to private school, please?

1096
00:47:23,690 --> 00:47:25,897
No, Dylan, we can't do that.
Want to know why?

1097
00:47:26,890 --> 00:47:28,619
Because ever since that day,

1098
00:47:29,050 --> 00:47:30,814
I've always run away from conflict.

1099
00:47:31,410 --> 00:47:36,052
In fact, if I had a dad like Dusty
when I was your age, maybe

1100
00:47:36,530 --> 00:47:39,010
he could have taught me
how to stand up for myself.

1101
00:47:39,570 --> 00:47:41,732
So, wait. You're saying,

1102
00:47:41,850 --> 00:47:44,091
if I don't stick up for myself now,

1103
00:47:44,290 --> 00:47:46,577
I'll grow up to be a huge wussy like you?

1104
00:47:46,930 --> 00:47:51,572
Um, yes. That is the basic
gist of what I'm saying. Yes.

1105
00:47:51,930 --> 00:47:53,932
Okay. Then let's do this.

1106
00:47:54,330 --> 00:47:55,900
Come on, buddy, you got this.

1107
00:47:55,970 --> 00:47:57,051
Give me something. Come on.

1108
00:47:57,130 --> 00:47:58,894
Faster, harder, meaner, stronger.

1109
00:47:58,970 --> 00:48:00,210
You're fast, you're good.

1110
00:48:00,290 --> 00:48:01,621
You're a winner. You're a champion.

1111
00:48:01,770 --> 00:48:04,694
They got to let you off the leash, baby.
We got a little pit bull here.

1112
00:48:05,610 --> 00:48:08,614
That was really nice,
you guys. Good job.

1113
00:48:08,690 --> 00:48:10,852
It was really fun to watch the
two of you working together

1114
00:48:10,930 --> 00:48:13,410
like a couple of great co-dads.

1115
00:48:13,730 --> 00:48:14,891
Yeah.

1116
00:48:15,450 --> 00:48:17,771
Co-dads. That's...

1117
00:48:18,450 --> 00:48:19,576
That's good stuff.

1118
00:48:19,770 --> 00:48:22,296
You know what?
In that same spirit of unity,

1119
00:48:23,250 --> 00:48:24,661
I want to show my gratitude
for your inviting me

1120
00:48:24,770 --> 00:48:26,499
to stay here
and share moments like these.

1121
00:48:26,610 --> 00:48:28,738
Oh, about that, Dusty.
When I pulled you over there, actually...

1122
00:48:28,850 --> 00:48:31,330
No, what you've done here
does not go unnoticed.

1123
00:48:31,410 --> 00:48:32,821
And I repay my debts.

1124
00:48:33,090 --> 00:48:34,854
Look, Sara, I know how much
you want another child.

1125
00:48:34,970 --> 00:48:36,779
I think I can help
put a baby in there for you.

1126
00:48:36,850 --> 00:48:38,534
- Oh, my God!
- What are you saying?

1127
00:48:38,610 --> 00:48:40,817
- I mean I got a guy.
- Dusty, please! You got a guy?

1128
00:48:40,890 --> 00:48:42,779
Yes, I got a guy. A fertility doctor.

1129
00:48:42,850 --> 00:48:45,091
He's a buddy of mine.
I trained him for his first lronman.

1130
00:48:45,170 --> 00:48:47,172
All right? Dr. Francisco is the real deal.

1131
00:48:47,490 --> 00:48:49,492
- Dr. Emilio Francisco?
- You've heard of him?

1132
00:48:49,610 --> 00:48:51,135
Oh, my God, yeah.

1133
00:48:51,290 --> 00:48:53,179
He's been on Dr. Oz like 10 times.

1134
00:48:53,330 --> 00:48:54,570
Yeah, he's one of the top five

1135
00:48:54,650 --> 00:48:56,539
reproductive endocrinologists
in the country.

1136
00:48:56,650 --> 00:48:59,460
See? People wait years
to get an appointment with this guy.

1137
00:48:59,530 --> 00:49:00,861
Do you really think he would see us?

1138
00:49:00,930 --> 00:49:02,898
- Whoa, whoa, hold on.
- I know he would.

1139
00:49:02,970 --> 00:49:05,541
If anybody can help you
have a baby, he can.

1140
00:49:06,010 --> 00:49:07,375
Mommy's going to have a baby?

1141
00:49:07,450 --> 00:49:08,736
Cool! Can we name it Griff?

1142
00:49:08,810 --> 00:49:09,936
Oh, thanks, D-man.

1143
00:49:10,010 --> 00:49:12,172
Look, you guys,
I don't know if this is a good idea.

1144
00:49:12,330 --> 00:49:14,094
What, you don't wanna name your baby
after a black person?

1145
00:49:14,170 --> 00:49:15,296
- Is that it?
- No!

1146
00:49:15,370 --> 00:49:16,860
You probably want to name it
something really white,

1147
00:49:16,930 --> 00:49:18,659
like Connor or Gordon.

1148
00:49:19,330 --> 00:49:23,051
Harland, or Scot with one T. Or Brad.

1149
00:49:23,130 --> 00:49:25,781
No, no, Griff is a lovely name.
I'm just saying,

1150
00:49:26,210 --> 00:49:28,338
I don't think it's a good
idea to get our hopes up,

1151
00:49:29,170 --> 00:49:31,218
because, in the end,

1152
00:49:31,330 --> 00:49:33,856
odds are, I'm going to let you down.

1153
00:49:34,530 --> 00:49:35,941
Okay, honey, but what if

1154
00:49:36,010 --> 00:49:38,820
I promise, promise, promise
not to get my hopes up?

1155
00:49:39,250 --> 00:49:41,218
We could just try, right? It can't hurt.

1156
00:49:42,570 --> 00:49:45,540
Okay, sure.
But you can't get your hopes up.

1157
00:49:45,690 --> 00:49:46,851
No. I won't, I won't! Thank you!

1158
00:49:46,930 --> 00:49:48,932
I feel like you've already
gotten your hopes up.

1159
00:49:50,170 --> 00:49:51,660
- Where are you going?
- Nowhere!

1160
00:49:51,730 --> 00:49:53,414
- You calling your mother?
- No!

1161
00:49:53,610 --> 00:49:55,612
Okay, yes, but it's about something else.

1162
00:49:55,930 --> 00:49:57,341
It's not about something else.

1163
00:49:57,770 --> 00:49:59,534
Damn it, Brad, he set you up.

1164
00:49:59,930 --> 00:50:03,139
He used this fancy doctor
to get your wife back on the baby train.

1165
00:50:03,450 --> 00:50:07,375
When those test results come back
and prove that you can't give her a baby,

1166
00:50:07,890 --> 00:50:10,052
guess who's gonna be waiting
there cocked and loaded?

1167
00:50:10,410 --> 00:50:12,492
Well, I trust my wife,

1168
00:50:12,810 --> 00:50:14,892
so we really don't need to
keep talking about it, okay?

1169
00:50:15,050 --> 00:50:16,734
Let me tell you a little story, Brad.

1170
00:50:17,090 --> 00:50:21,254
When Jeneane, my fourth, and I
were returning from our honeymoon,

1171
00:50:21,330 --> 00:50:23,378
she told me that
she had a 23-year-old kid.

1172
00:50:23,610 --> 00:50:26,454
Brazilian boy.
Said she had him real young.

1173
00:50:26,730 --> 00:50:27,856
So he moves in with us.

1174
00:50:28,170 --> 00:50:29,581
Doesn't speak a lick of English.

1175
00:50:29,770 --> 00:50:32,979
There are the usual tensions.
I try to assert my authority.

1176
00:50:33,290 --> 00:50:35,861
"Andreas, get your feet off the furniture."

1177
00:50:36,050 --> 00:50:38,894
"Andreas, you're too old
to sleep in bed with Mommy."

1178
00:50:39,290 --> 00:50:41,941
"Andreas, you got to stay off the 'roids."

1179
00:50:42,250 --> 00:50:44,696
And he'd get mad,
and hit me with a car antenna.

1180
00:50:45,250 --> 00:50:46,934
Eh... Maybe that's the way kids are.

1181
00:50:47,130 --> 00:50:48,620
No. Not really.

1182
00:50:48,690 --> 00:50:51,170
So I adopt him,
help him get his citizenship.

1183
00:50:51,690 --> 00:50:54,580
The second the papers come through,
guess what happens?

1184
00:50:54,770 --> 00:50:55,737
I already know.

1185
00:50:55,810 --> 00:50:57,812
Barn! They shack up together in Barstow.

1186
00:50:57,930 --> 00:50:59,853
It turns out Andreas

1187
00:50:59,930 --> 00:51:01,773
- is her boyfriend, Brad.
- Mmm-hmm.

1188
00:51:02,130 --> 00:51:03,814
I did not see it coming.

1189
00:51:03,930 --> 00:51:08,299
I actually did, about one,
two words into your story.

1190
00:51:08,370 --> 00:51:10,054
The moral of this fable is,

1191
00:51:10,130 --> 00:51:11,734
it's good to know when you're beaten.

1192
00:51:12,290 --> 00:51:14,816
- You know I think the world of you, Brad.
- Thank you.

1193
00:51:14,970 --> 00:51:18,577
But if I'm being completely honest,
even I'm rooting for Dusty.

1194
00:51:19,170 --> 00:51:20,695
He's just so damn likeable.

1195
00:51:21,490 --> 00:51:25,097
You know, it's getting kind of late.
Shouldn't we just get back to work?

1196
00:51:25,490 --> 00:51:26,855
Okay, you win.

1197
00:51:27,690 --> 00:51:31,536
So where are we on The Panda Jam
numbers for next summer?

1198
00:51:32,810 --> 00:51:35,177
London, you still on the conference call?

1199
00:51:37,170 --> 00:51:39,821
Dusty Mayron, you crazy hijo de puta!

1200
00:51:40,690 --> 00:51:42,613
Hey, what's up, Doc?

1201
00:51:42,690 --> 00:51:45,261
You look great, man. You still
rocking those lronmans, huh?

1202
00:51:45,330 --> 00:51:47,412
Yeah, bro. I just finished Brazil in 11:40.

1203
00:51:47,490 --> 00:51:49,254
- That's unbelievable.
- Yeah. Well, come on.

1204
00:51:49,330 --> 00:51:50,536
Ain't nothing on you, man.

1205
00:51:50,650 --> 00:51:53,654
Hey, my first race,
I'm limping across the finish line

1206
00:51:53,730 --> 00:51:55,141
when this bastard laps me.

1207
00:51:55,330 --> 00:51:56,695
I mean, come on, who wins an lronman,

1208
00:51:56,810 --> 00:51:58,733
then decides to go around again?
Who does that?

1209
00:51:58,810 --> 00:52:00,335
It sounds exhausting.

1210
00:52:00,610 --> 00:52:03,932
Hey, I'm Dr. Francisco.
You must be Sara.

1211
00:52:04,090 --> 00:52:05,091
Hi.

1212
00:52:05,210 --> 00:52:08,373
Dusty, you were not lying
about this one. Very nice.

1213
00:52:09,050 --> 00:52:10,256
And you weren't lying
about this one either.

1214
00:52:10,330 --> 00:52:11,695
You must be Chief Glowing Sack.

1215
00:52:11,770 --> 00:52:13,454
What?

1216
00:52:13,570 --> 00:52:14,935
Hey, come on,
I'm just lighting you up, man.

1217
00:52:15,010 --> 00:52:16,057
Come on, little hug.

1218
00:52:16,170 --> 00:52:19,014
Okay, come on back, y'all.
Let's take a look.

1219
00:52:20,010 --> 00:52:21,535
All right. So let's run it down.

1220
00:52:22,010 --> 00:52:23,455
I think we can safely say

1221
00:52:23,530 --> 00:52:25,532
that your issue has nothing
to do with X-rays.

1222
00:52:25,730 --> 00:52:28,336
You know what, sweetheart, come here.
Let's see that pretty little hand.

1223
00:52:28,410 --> 00:52:30,060
Okay. Now put it right in here.

1224
00:52:30,370 --> 00:52:32,611
- Oh!
- Okay, you feel that?

1225
00:52:32,690 --> 00:52:34,533
- Yeah.
- Okay, that is not how you want

1226
00:52:34,610 --> 00:52:35,896
testicles to be shaped.

1227
00:52:36,050 --> 00:52:39,054
Really? It feels like all the other...

1228
00:52:39,210 --> 00:52:40,211
Hi.

1229
00:52:40,370 --> 00:52:42,850
Well, it cuts off blood flow, okay?
Limits potency.

1230
00:52:42,930 --> 00:52:45,058
You want them to...
You know what? Actually...

1231
00:52:45,690 --> 00:52:47,818
"Hey, Dusty!
- Hey.

1232
00:52:47,890 --> 00:52:50,052
- Why is he coming in here?
- Little help in here, please.

1233
00:52:50,250 --> 00:52:51,820
Oh, come on. You gotta put me
through this every time?

1234
00:52:51,890 --> 00:52:53,380
- Come on. Be a sport.
- All right.

1235
00:52:53,770 --> 00:52:54,931
Oh, my God! What are you doing?

1236
00:52:55,050 --> 00:52:56,575
Is this even ethical?

1237
00:52:56,930 --> 00:52:59,251
James and the Giant Peach.

1238
00:53:00,730 --> 00:53:02,892
- Did you just gulp?
- No.

1239
00:53:03,130 --> 00:53:04,655
It's okay, I gulp every time.

1240
00:53:05,130 --> 00:53:08,657
You see, this... This is what you want.

1241
00:53:08,970 --> 00:53:10,415
Plump and bulbous.

1242
00:53:10,810 --> 00:53:12,812
Glassy smooth, like

1243
00:53:12,890 --> 00:53:15,336
two Patrick Stewarts,
you know what I mean?

1244
00:53:15,410 --> 00:53:17,458
Don't embarrass me in front
of Sara like this anymore, okay?

1245
00:53:17,530 --> 00:53:18,816
Hey, sorry, bro.

1246
00:53:18,890 --> 00:53:21,416
So, ready to milk the cow,
see if we even got a sliver of hope here?

1247
00:53:21,490 --> 00:53:23,936
Hey, Dusty, come on, buddy. Want to
try to break your own record?

1248
00:53:24,010 --> 00:53:25,057
Oh, no, I'm good.

1249
00:53:25,130 --> 00:53:27,019
Hey, come on, man.
I'm doing you a favor here.

1250
00:53:27,090 --> 00:53:29,297
Give me something to brag
about at the next symposium.

1251
00:53:29,410 --> 00:53:32,698
All right, fine. You want to break
the record, I gotta break the record.

1252
00:53:33,210 --> 00:53:35,212
Yeah. Kid came to play.

1253
00:53:35,690 --> 00:53:36,976
Should I grab a big cup, too?

1254
00:53:37,050 --> 00:53:38,097
What? Stop screwing around.

1255
00:53:38,250 --> 00:53:39,775
Come on. We're burning daylight here.

1256
00:54:09,010 --> 00:54:12,810
Hello. Quick question.
How difficult would it be

1257
00:54:12,890 --> 00:54:15,734
for someone to whip up
a batch of your Cinnabons?

1258
00:54:16,050 --> 00:54:17,973
Would you need
restaurant-grade ovens?

1259
00:54:18,050 --> 00:54:20,052
Bradsky. Could you
pass this along to Dusty?

1260
00:54:20,170 --> 00:54:21,535
It's his first resids check.

1261
00:54:21,650 --> 00:54:23,414
Disclaimer. It's more than you make.

1262
00:54:23,490 --> 00:54:25,140
- Don't get worried about it.
- How much more than...

1263
00:54:25,250 --> 00:54:28,174
Oh, and tell him,
8:30 sharp at my house.

1264
00:54:28,570 --> 00:54:30,413
He doesn't need to bring anything.
All right, buddy?

1265
00:54:30,490 --> 00:54:31,821
I've never been to your house.

1266
00:54:31,890 --> 00:54:33,335
No, you haven't.

1267
00:54:36,650 --> 00:54:40,018
Oh, my God,
my hair, it looks awful.

1268
00:54:40,330 --> 00:54:41,661
Doesn't Mommy's hair look pretty?

1269
00:54:41,730 --> 00:54:43,494
- No. Next slide, please.
- Oh, okay.

1270
00:54:43,810 --> 00:54:46,416
- Slides. Fun.
- Aw...

1271
00:54:46,850 --> 00:54:48,500
Cool. You guys climbed that?

1272
00:54:48,730 --> 00:54:51,415
Yuck. Why are you guys kissing
in every single picture?

1273
00:54:51,650 --> 00:54:53,698
Oh, Mommy used to kiss Daddy a lot.

1274
00:54:53,930 --> 00:54:55,500
Married people kiss a lot.

1275
00:54:55,650 --> 00:54:56,776
Ready?

1276
00:54:56,850 --> 00:54:58,181
Wow, China.

1277
00:54:58,450 --> 00:55:00,020
I loved it there.

1278
00:55:00,170 --> 00:55:02,411
Dylan, you were created right
there on that wall, buddy.

1279
00:55:02,530 --> 00:55:04,180
- Really?
- Dusty, that's enough.

1280
00:55:04,330 --> 00:55:06,617
Okay, next slide.

1281
00:55:06,770 --> 00:55:09,774
That's where your mom and I met,
doing The King and I in summer stock.

1282
00:55:10,370 --> 00:55:13,021
God,
that costume was so tight.

1283
00:55:13,530 --> 00:55:15,373
Next slide, please.

1284
00:55:15,770 --> 00:55:17,135
Oh, my God.

1285
00:55:19,210 --> 00:55:20,894
- Is that baby me?
Mmm-hmm.

1286
00:55:33,050 --> 00:55:36,532
All right, you guys, let's,
um, get ready for bed.

1287
00:55:37,050 --> 00:55:39,098
- Okay?
- It's story time, Mayron family!

1288
00:55:40,210 --> 00:55:42,736
We don't have to wait
for Mr. Whitaker, do we?

1289
00:55:42,810 --> 00:55:47,134
I really don't like you,
but that shit is heartbreaking.

1290
00:55:52,570 --> 00:55:54,572
Yay! Griff's home!

1291
00:55:55,010 --> 00:55:56,455
So the King raised his mighty sword

1292
00:55:56,530 --> 00:55:58,737
and rained steel
down upon the Step King.

1293
00:55:59,650 --> 00:56:01,334
But the Step King
blocked it with his shield.

1294
00:56:02,250 --> 00:56:05,015
And swung his cat o'nine tails
into the King's smug face.

1295
00:56:05,090 --> 00:56:07,741
Which the King easily brushed aside
like the feather of a gull.

1296
00:56:07,810 --> 00:56:10,495
And then the King did counter
with a barrage of slashes

1297
00:56:10,570 --> 00:56:13,892
and thrusts so fast and precise
that the Step King had no way to parry.

1298
00:56:13,970 --> 00:56:15,017
Yay!

1299
00:56:15,090 --> 00:56:17,491
But he did. He did.
He parried all of them.

1300
00:56:17,570 --> 00:56:20,016
- Easily. It was no big deal.
- Aw.

1301
00:56:20,090 --> 00:56:22,775
Then he grabbed the King's
sword right out of his hand

1302
00:56:23,330 --> 00:56:25,094
and smashed it over his knee.

1303
00:56:25,250 --> 00:56:26,297
Boo!

1304
00:56:26,370 --> 00:56:28,976
That's when the King pulled out
a pump-action Mossberg shotgun!

1305
00:56:29,050 --> 00:56:30,973
Which is completely anachronistic.

1306
00:56:31,210 --> 00:56:34,532
So if we're doing any time period,
then the Step King just happened to be

1307
00:56:34,610 --> 00:56:36,453
wearing Kevlar body armor.

1308
00:56:36,690 --> 00:56:38,374
- Concussion grenade!
- Hand grenade.

1309
00:56:38,610 --> 00:56:39,941
- Rocket launcher.
- Missile launcher.

1310
00:56:40,010 --> 00:56:41,216
- Air strike.
- Nuclear strike.

1311
00:56:41,290 --> 00:56:42,735
- Black hole.
- God.

1312
00:56:43,130 --> 00:56:44,461
We know what this comes down to.

1313
00:56:44,690 --> 00:56:47,216
The Step King was very upset

1314
00:56:47,290 --> 00:56:49,213
because when the real King
pulled out his sword,

1315
00:56:49,530 --> 00:56:51,373
it was long and shiny,

1316
00:56:51,450 --> 00:56:53,532
and the Step King
did shudder at the size of it.

1317
00:56:53,610 --> 00:56:57,296
And while the Step King acknowledged
that the King carried a mighty,

1318
00:56:57,370 --> 00:56:58,974
beautifully engraved broadsword,

1319
00:56:59,290 --> 00:57:01,418
all the maidens in the land

1320
00:57:01,490 --> 00:57:03,936
preferred the more average-sized

1321
00:57:04,090 --> 00:57:05,819
Step King's sword because

1322
00:57:06,130 --> 00:57:07,416
it knew how to listen.

1323
00:57:07,530 --> 00:57:09,294
And the King needs to realize

1324
00:57:09,370 --> 00:57:10,974
he's a guest in his castle

1325
00:57:11,290 --> 00:57:13,258
and he better mind his P's and Q's

1326
00:57:13,370 --> 00:57:15,418
because the Step King
has had it up to here

1327
00:57:15,490 --> 00:57:16,901
with the King's bullshit!

1328
00:57:17,130 --> 00:57:18,416
Brad said a naughty word.

1329
00:57:18,490 --> 00:57:22,256
Kids, I'm so sorry you had to hear
that inappropriate language.

1330
00:57:22,330 --> 00:57:23,491
Make sure you tell your mother.

1331
00:57:23,570 --> 00:57:25,254
Brad, can I talk to you
in the hall, please?

1332
00:57:27,650 --> 00:57:30,381
Brad, what just
happened in there, man?

1333
00:57:30,650 --> 00:57:32,937
Look, the Step King
should not have

1334
00:57:33,010 --> 00:57:34,341
used inappropriate language

1335
00:57:34,490 --> 00:57:36,777
in front of the Prince and Princess,
he admits that.

1336
00:57:36,850 --> 00:57:37,851
Why are you still saying it
like that, Brad?

1337
00:57:37,970 --> 00:57:39,017
We're out in the hall.

1338
00:57:39,090 --> 00:57:41,172
I don't know. I'm upset.

1339
00:57:41,410 --> 00:57:42,696
Hold on.

1340
00:57:43,330 --> 00:57:44,456
Oh-ho-ho! Hello?

1341
00:57:44,930 --> 00:57:46,853
Yeah, Brad's here, he's doing good.

1342
00:57:47,090 --> 00:57:48,330
Hey, it's Dr. Francisco.

1343
00:57:48,410 --> 00:57:49,935
He wants us all to come in tomorrow.
9:30 work for you?

1344
00:57:50,010 --> 00:57:51,011
- Yeah, I guess so.
- Yeah,

1345
00:57:51,090 --> 00:57:53,377
we'll see you then.
All right, bud. Come on, man.

1346
00:57:54,010 --> 00:57:55,933
The doctor will be with you in a moment.

1347
00:57:56,010 --> 00:57:57,375
Thank you.

1348
00:58:02,290 --> 00:58:03,371
Hey, Brad,

1349
00:58:04,370 --> 00:58:05,701
whatever happens here,
I just want you to know

1350
00:58:05,810 --> 00:58:07,699
that I'm proud of you for doing your best.

1351
00:58:07,770 --> 00:58:08,931
- Okay?
- Thank you.

1352
00:58:09,050 --> 00:58:12,691
Hello, hello. Okay.
I'm going to cut right to the chase.

1353
00:58:12,970 --> 00:58:15,541
Sara, I'm afraid I've got some bad news.

1354
00:58:15,850 --> 00:58:18,057
Oh, God. That is
a tough break. I'm sorry.

1355
00:58:18,130 --> 00:58:20,371
Damn, that is a real shame.
My heart is melting.

1356
00:58:20,450 --> 00:58:22,134
Yeah, it's a real shame, Sara.

1357
00:58:22,210 --> 00:58:23,655
A real shame that
you're gonna have to put up

1358
00:58:23,730 --> 00:58:25,141
with Brad here pounding away on you

1359
00:58:25,370 --> 00:58:28,374
over and over,
now that he's got a fighting chance

1360
00:58:28,450 --> 00:58:29,815
of getting you pregnant.

1361
00:58:30,210 --> 00:58:32,292
What? Oh, my God!

1362
00:58:32,370 --> 00:58:34,577
- Holy moly!
- Oh, my God.

1363
00:58:35,210 --> 00:58:37,531
Hey, Doc, Doc, don't give them
a false sense of hope.

1364
00:58:37,650 --> 00:58:40,699
Remember what you said about
the blood flow and the screwy 'nads?

1365
00:58:40,770 --> 00:58:42,977
Yeah, well, Brad has you
to thank for that, Dusty.

1366
00:58:43,050 --> 00:58:45,496
Okay, in lab rats,
whenever another alpha male

1367
00:58:45,570 --> 00:58:47,334
comes around,
it can spike testosterone,

1368
00:58:47,410 --> 00:58:48,696
driving up sperm counts.

1369
00:58:48,770 --> 00:58:51,455
Now, no guarantees, okay?
But with my help, Brad,

1370
00:58:51,530 --> 00:58:54,261
I think you got enough left in the tank
to make it all the way to baby town.

1371
00:58:54,330 --> 00:58:55,491
That's so wonderful. Thank you.

1372
00:58:55,570 --> 00:58:58,096
- Thank you so much.
- Of course.

1373
00:58:58,170 --> 00:59:00,093
- Can we give you a hug?
- Oh, yeah. Come on in.

1374
00:59:01,090 --> 00:59:02,740
Oh, my gosh.

1375
00:59:03,250 --> 00:59:05,139
- Did not expect this.
- Mmm...

1376
00:59:20,450 --> 00:59:22,612
You virile sea snake, you.

1377
00:59:22,730 --> 00:59:24,937
- I underestimated you, Brad.
- Yes, you did.

1378
00:59:25,370 --> 00:59:28,852
I can finally give Sara everything,
and it feels good.

1379
00:59:29,130 --> 00:59:30,291
Now, listen, this is what you need to do.

1380
00:59:30,370 --> 00:59:33,453
You need to go and pee outside
the room that Dusty sleeps in.

1381
00:59:33,570 --> 00:59:36,050
He's gonna smell your urine
and know that

1382
00:59:36,130 --> 00:59:38,576
your virility is not to be taken lightly.

1383
00:59:39,690 --> 00:59:41,931
It's good advice.
I did it last year in the lobby.

1384
00:59:42,090 --> 00:59:44,218
Oh, I remember. It was a health hazard.

1385
00:59:44,290 --> 00:59:45,371
It scared the FedEx guy.

1386
00:59:45,450 --> 00:59:47,817
No, I'm going to take
the high road on this one.

1387
00:59:47,930 --> 00:59:49,375
Okay, fine, take the high road.

1388
00:59:49,530 --> 00:59:52,181
But jam a baby up in there
as quickly as you can, Brad.

1389
00:59:52,450 --> 00:59:55,056
Because, in the end, if Sara
does choose Dusty over you,

1390
00:59:55,130 --> 00:59:57,781
he has to be stepdad to your baby.

1391
00:59:57,850 --> 00:59:59,056
How beautiful is that?

1392
00:59:59,130 --> 01:00:00,416
Come on, five it.

1393
01:00:00,490 --> 01:00:03,061
No. You know, it feels strange

1394
01:00:03,130 --> 01:00:06,612
to high-five over the custody
of my unborn child.

1395
01:00:06,690 --> 01:00:07,771
I've been on Dusty's team.

1396
01:00:07,850 --> 01:00:10,421
I'm trying to jump over
to the winning team Brad.

1397
01:00:10,490 --> 01:00:12,379
- Get on this.
- I'd really rather not.

1398
01:00:12,490 --> 01:00:15,255
I'm trying to share a moment
with you here. Please five me.

1399
01:00:15,370 --> 01:00:17,498
It feels... No, thanks.

1400
01:00:17,930 --> 01:00:19,216
- Got it!
- Wait. No.

1401
01:00:19,290 --> 01:00:20,576
- Sweet.
- it didn't count.

1402
01:00:20,650 --> 01:00:21,731
I love you, Brad.

1403
01:00:21,850 --> 01:00:23,090
It's not a binding high-five.

1404
01:00:23,170 --> 01:00:24,535
Fat beans in there.

1405
01:00:25,370 --> 01:00:27,020
- Dusty?
- Brad.

1406
01:00:27,370 --> 01:00:28,895
What can I do for you?

1407
01:00:29,210 --> 01:00:31,736
Oh, wow, that's some
impressive up-downs.

1408
01:00:32,050 --> 01:00:33,381
Look, uh,

1409
01:00:34,330 --> 01:00:38,016
what you did for Sara and me,

1410
01:00:38,210 --> 01:00:39,735
that's a life-changer, and

1411
01:00:40,410 --> 01:00:42,219
I just wanted to say thank you.

1412
01:00:42,570 --> 01:00:44,220
And I'm sorry.

1413
01:00:44,530 --> 01:00:45,861
Sorry for what?

1414
01:00:46,410 --> 01:00:48,412
Well, here's the thing.

1415
01:00:49,010 --> 01:00:51,695
I mean, you show up,

1416
01:00:52,730 --> 01:00:56,416
here's this guy who's cool and exciting.

1417
01:00:56,730 --> 01:01:01,770
I guess I felt a little competitive, and
slightly insecure, and I start thinking,

1418
01:01:01,890 --> 01:01:04,416
well, maybe you want to challenge me.

1419
01:01:05,770 --> 01:01:08,137
But today you proved that
all you really care about

1420
01:01:08,210 --> 01:01:09,621
is our family's happiness.

1421
01:01:09,730 --> 01:01:10,856
Oh, man.

1422
01:01:11,090 --> 01:01:12,421
I'm humbled.

1423
01:01:12,530 --> 01:01:14,259
I mean it. And you know what?

1424
01:01:14,730 --> 01:01:17,210
You're right.
I was challenging you, Brad.

1425
01:01:17,410 --> 01:01:18,935
- Yeah?
- The truth?

1426
01:01:19,770 --> 01:01:21,659
I see this new man in my kids' life.

1427
01:01:21,730 --> 01:01:24,620
He's kind and caring and successful,
and I don't even want to like you.

1428
01:01:25,290 --> 01:01:27,691
But I can't help it. I like you, Brad.

1429
01:01:28,290 --> 01:01:29,291
Really?

1430
01:01:29,450 --> 01:01:31,771
I was determined to push you out
and get my family back.

1431
01:01:31,890 --> 01:01:34,496
I was underhanded and
disingenuous about it.

1432
01:01:34,570 --> 01:01:36,060
I feel like a monster.

1433
01:01:36,130 --> 01:01:38,053
No. No, no, no.

1434
01:01:39,730 --> 01:01:43,098
At the risk of being disrespectful,
I want you to shut your mouth.

1435
01:01:43,570 --> 01:01:46,699
You are allowed
to have those feelings. Okay?

1436
01:01:47,370 --> 01:01:49,941
Heck, we're talking about
your own children here, for cripes' sake.

1437
01:01:51,290 --> 01:01:52,530
Clean slate?

1438
01:01:52,930 --> 01:01:54,261
Absolutely.

1439
01:01:55,010 --> 01:01:56,091
Come here.

1440
01:01:59,130 --> 01:02:01,258
You know what's funny?
You're not even sweating,

1441
01:02:01,450 --> 01:02:03,373
after doing all those push-ups.

1442
01:02:03,570 --> 01:02:04,776
That's exemplary.

1443
01:02:08,970 --> 01:02:10,210
Thank you, Dusty.

1444
01:02:10,290 --> 01:02:11,291
Thank you, Brad.

1445
01:02:14,970 --> 01:02:15,971
Oh, uh...

1446
01:02:16,130 --> 01:02:20,579
You know, all that stuff about pushing
me out and taking over my family,

1447
01:02:20,650 --> 01:02:22,220
I mean, we're through all that, right?

1448
01:02:22,610 --> 01:02:24,533
Oh, no, no, no. I'm here to defeat you

1449
01:02:24,610 --> 01:02:26,419
and take back my family.
That can't change.

1450
01:02:26,490 --> 01:02:29,175
But now I'll follow your noble example
and do it above board.

1451
01:02:29,490 --> 01:02:32,255
Honestly. Like a man. Like you.

1452
01:02:32,690 --> 01:02:35,773
But we just hugged.
You said you like me.

1453
01:02:36,290 --> 01:02:37,701
Oh, I do like you, Brad, very much.

1454
01:02:37,770 --> 01:02:39,010
It doesn't make this any easier.

1455
01:02:39,330 --> 01:02:41,856
You know I'm gonna have to tell Sara
what you said in here today.

1456
01:02:41,970 --> 01:02:44,177
Of course.
It would be irresponsible not to.

1457
01:02:44,490 --> 01:02:46,094
She's not gonna like it.
She's gonna want you out.

1458
01:02:46,170 --> 01:02:47,456
You're right about that, Brad.

1459
01:02:47,530 --> 01:02:48,895
What the hell are you up to?

1460
01:02:48,970 --> 01:02:50,495
I just told you what I'm up to.

1461
01:02:50,690 --> 01:02:52,692
My head is spinning right now.

1462
01:02:52,970 --> 01:02:55,371
Hey, you got any sweet potatoes?
Or yams?

1463
01:02:55,490 --> 01:02:56,776
Sweet potatoes or yams?

1464
01:02:56,850 --> 01:02:59,296
Griff, you know we have yams, all right?

1465
01:02:59,370 --> 01:03:01,099
You made me buy them for you.

1466
01:03:01,170 --> 01:03:02,899
I wanted to respect
your house by asking you

1467
01:03:03,010 --> 01:03:05,331
before I got them.
I didn't want to just go grab yams.

1468
01:03:05,410 --> 01:03:07,299
Okay, I appreciate that.
I'm dealing with something.

1469
01:03:07,370 --> 01:03:09,611
- Just go get the yams.
- All right.

1470
01:03:09,690 --> 01:03:11,613
Here's the thing. You're right, Dusty.

1471
01:03:11,730 --> 01:03:13,892
Yeah. I'm not going to tell Sara.

1472
01:03:14,170 --> 01:03:16,059
But I'm gonna prove to you
that I'm the best.

1473
01:03:16,330 --> 01:03:19,334
You can eat my dust, Dusty.

1474
01:03:35,250 --> 01:03:38,572
Christmas already?
Why didn't anybody tell me?

1475
01:03:38,650 --> 01:03:40,459
It's not. It's the middle of April.

1476
01:03:42,370 --> 01:03:45,021
- Daddy must have done this!
- Ho, ho, ho, ho!

1477
01:03:45,530 --> 01:03:47,532
No, he didn't.

1478
01:03:48,090 --> 01:03:49,740
- Brad.
- Ho, ho!

1479
01:03:50,330 --> 01:03:52,651
Claus is the name.
Santa Claus, if you please.

1480
01:03:52,770 --> 01:03:54,499
But this Brad you speak of

1481
01:03:54,570 --> 01:03:56,459
called me all the way up
at the North Pole.

1482
01:03:56,530 --> 01:03:59,215
He said his children
were so sad because

1483
01:03:59,410 --> 01:04:01,936
their biological father
had missed so many

1484
01:04:02,050 --> 01:04:04,291
Christmases and birthdays

1485
01:04:04,370 --> 01:04:07,135
and special family holidays,
so he asked me

1486
01:04:07,210 --> 01:04:09,861
to come here today so that Dusty

1487
01:04:09,930 --> 01:04:12,058
could experience one Christmas

1488
01:04:12,130 --> 01:04:14,019
with his kids before he leaves again.

1489
01:04:14,530 --> 01:04:16,020
Probably for a long, long time.

1490
01:04:16,090 --> 01:04:17,091
Ho,ho, ho!

1491
01:04:17,250 --> 01:04:18,615
Can we open presents?

1492
01:04:18,930 --> 01:04:20,773
You sure can, little girl.

1493
01:04:20,890 --> 01:04:22,255
I think they're from Brad.

1494
01:04:22,490 --> 01:04:24,413
In fact, all the presents are from Brad.

1495
01:04:24,770 --> 01:04:27,296
Let's see if any of the
presents are from Dusty.

1496
01:04:28,130 --> 01:04:32,579
Nope. Not one present from Dusty.
All from Brad.

1497
01:04:32,650 --> 01:04:35,574
Hey, kids, let's not forget
who got you a dog. Remember?

1498
01:04:35,650 --> 01:04:37,493
Hey, Tumor, quit humping Mrs. Claus!

1499
01:04:39,090 --> 01:04:41,172
Okay, I am officially worried about you.

1500
01:04:41,250 --> 01:04:43,537
Don't worry, Claus hasn't forgotten you.

1501
01:04:45,050 --> 01:04:46,051
Huh?

1502
01:04:46,130 --> 01:04:47,780
- For me?
- Yeah.

1503
01:04:50,090 --> 01:04:53,572
Oh, my God, honey, it's beautiful.
I love it.

1504
01:04:53,810 --> 01:04:57,098
Wait, no! No! No, no. It's too much.

1505
01:04:58,650 --> 01:05:03,178
Oh, no, it looks like Tumor's
given away Megan's big gift.

1506
01:05:10,330 --> 01:05:12,014
A D0r1y! A pony! A pony!

1507
01:05:12,130 --> 01:05:13,700
I know, it's a pony!

1508
01:05:14,010 --> 01:05:15,899
Ho, ho, ho!

1509
01:05:15,970 --> 01:05:18,940
It's a pony, Dusty! A pony!

1510
01:05:19,010 --> 01:05:20,375
Can we name her Princess Elsa?

1511
01:05:20,530 --> 01:05:24,091
You can name him whatever you want,
because it's yours!

1512
01:05:24,730 --> 01:05:25,970
Brad, how can we afford a pony?

1513
01:05:26,050 --> 01:05:27,336
Where are we even
going to put that thing?

1514
01:05:27,490 --> 01:05:29,731
I can clear out some stable
space in the garage.

1515
01:05:29,810 --> 01:05:31,335
Look, it's only half a horse.

1516
01:05:31,970 --> 01:05:34,974
Okay? Think of it like
a big dog, only a lot better.

1517
01:05:35,370 --> 01:05:37,498
Oh, What's this? What the heck?

1518
01:05:37,690 --> 01:05:40,978
It's tickets to tonight's
NBA playoff game...

1519
01:05:41,050 --> 01:05:42,859
- What?
- ... against Dylan's favorite team,

1520
01:05:42,930 --> 01:05:44,295
the Los Angeles Lakers?

1521
01:05:44,370 --> 01:05:46,498
Oh, thanks, Brad! You're the coolest!

1522
01:05:46,690 --> 01:05:48,180
I love you, Brad!

1523
01:05:48,490 --> 01:05:49,821
Not bad.

1524
01:05:50,490 --> 01:05:51,730
Not bad at all.

1525
01:05:51,810 --> 01:05:54,051
Merry Christmas, Whitaker family!

1526
01:05:54,370 --> 01:05:55,496
Christmas?

1527
01:05:56,370 --> 01:05:58,020
How long was I asleep for?

1528
01:06:06,730 --> 01:06:08,220
- You guys got enough candy?
- Yeah!

1529
01:06:08,290 --> 01:06:10,497
Remember, you can have anything
you want, 'cause it's Christmas!

1530
01:06:10,570 --> 01:06:12,572
No, it isn't. It's not Christmas, kids.

1531
01:06:12,770 --> 01:06:15,614
- All right. Here we are.
- Oh, sick! We're this close?

1532
01:06:15,690 --> 01:06:18,534
Yeah. Pretty good, right?
Megan, you sit down right there.

1533
01:06:18,610 --> 01:06:20,533
Perfect. Dylan, you sit next to me.

1534
01:06:20,730 --> 01:06:23,301
And, Dusty, I'm so sorry. Yeah.

1535
01:06:23,410 --> 01:06:25,458
I could only get four in a row.
I couldn't get five.

1536
01:06:25,530 --> 01:06:27,259
So you're across the aisle,
next to that gentleman.

1537
01:06:29,170 --> 01:06:30,501
All right, guys, I'll be right here.

1538
01:06:30,610 --> 01:06:32,180
- We can still chat.
- Bye, Daddy.

1539
01:06:33,730 --> 01:06:37,177
Look, there's Kobe! It's him!
He's right there.

1540
01:06:37,250 --> 01:06:40,413
Thank you, Brad, this is the best present
I've ever gotten.

1541
01:06:40,530 --> 01:06:42,453
- You are so welcome.
- In my whole life.

1542
01:06:42,530 --> 01:06:44,897
I'm glad to hear it's the
best present you've ever got!

1543
01:06:46,250 --> 01:06:47,661
How much did these seats cost?

1544
01:06:47,890 --> 01:06:49,016
Not too much.

1545
01:06:49,090 --> 01:06:50,694
Ladies and gentlemen,
let's give a big welcome

1546
01:06:50,770 --> 01:06:52,852
to all the kids from Hearts of Courage.

1547
01:06:52,930 --> 01:06:55,740
Whoo! Hearts of Courage kids!

1548
01:06:55,810 --> 01:06:57,892
Proud of you, you're all miracles!

1549
01:06:58,730 --> 01:07:00,016
Whoo! I love kids!

1550
01:07:00,090 --> 01:07:01,535
All right, honey. That's plenty.

1551
01:07:01,610 --> 01:07:03,612
I just get excited
when I'm with my family!

1552
01:07:04,090 --> 01:07:06,297
Dusty! Dusty Mayron!

1553
01:07:06,770 --> 01:07:08,613
Marco? Hey!

1554
01:07:08,730 --> 01:07:10,380
What's up, man?
Are you coaching now?

1555
01:07:10,450 --> 01:07:11,736
Yeah, I'm the new strength
and conditioning coach.

1556
01:07:11,810 --> 01:07:12,857
- Oh, man.
- Check you out.

1557
01:07:12,970 --> 01:07:14,301
Hey, I played ball with him in Italy.

1558
01:07:14,450 --> 01:07:16,293
This is my family. My little guy, Dylan.

1559
01:07:16,410 --> 01:07:18,060
He's the biggest Kobe fan in the world.

1560
01:07:18,130 --> 01:07:20,098
Really? Well, come on down.
I'll introduce you.

1561
01:07:20,210 --> 01:07:21,655
- What?
- What? You hear that?

1562
01:07:21,770 --> 01:07:22,817
You want to meet Kobe?

1563
01:07:22,890 --> 01:07:23,937
Bring the whole family down.

1564
01:07:24,010 --> 01:07:25,421
You guys can sit with the team.

1565
01:07:25,490 --> 01:07:26,537
Hey, this is my little girl, Megan.

1566
01:07:26,650 --> 01:07:28,254
She just invited me to her first
Daddy-Daughter Dance.

1567
01:07:28,650 --> 01:07:30,095
- So sweet.
- What did he just say?

1568
01:07:31,450 --> 01:07:33,214
What the hell did he just say?

1569
01:07:33,610 --> 01:07:34,941
Oh, sorry. He's okay.

1570
01:07:35,090 --> 01:07:36,819
No, I'm not okay. He's not okay.

1571
01:07:36,890 --> 01:07:38,938
- Honey, you need to calm down.
- No! I'm not gonna calm down.

1572
01:07:39,010 --> 01:07:40,216
She asked me first!

1573
01:07:40,330 --> 01:07:42,537
And now she's asking him?
No. It's not fair.

1574
01:07:42,610 --> 01:07:45,011
You know what, actually, it's very fair.
Okay? She has two dads.

1575
01:07:45,090 --> 01:07:47,172
She wants you both there.
You just have to accept that.

1576
01:07:47,290 --> 01:07:49,531
No, I'm not going to accept it. All right?

1577
01:07:49,610 --> 01:07:51,931
I do pick-up! I do drop-off!

1578
01:07:52,170 --> 01:07:53,740
Okay, I volunteer at school!

1579
01:07:53,810 --> 01:07:55,858
I listen to the tantrums and the crying

1580
01:07:55,970 --> 01:07:59,497
and the soundtrack of Frozen
that's on a goddamn loop all the time!

1581
01:08:00,010 --> 01:08:04,857
And he just waltzes in for a few days,
and now he gets to go as well? No!

1582
01:08:05,050 --> 01:08:07,735
No, she's got to choose.
It's either me or him!

1583
01:08:07,810 --> 01:08:09,380
Megan, you got to choose!

1584
01:08:09,650 --> 01:08:10,731
- You got to choose!
- Hey!

1585
01:08:10,810 --> 01:08:12,221
It's the biggest decision of your life!

1586
01:08:12,290 --> 01:08:13,291
Hey!

1587
01:08:14,130 --> 01:08:16,736
You know what? I'm going to pretend
you're not acting like a crazy person,

1588
01:08:16,810 --> 01:08:18,539
because I know you're very upset.

1589
01:08:19,170 --> 01:08:21,411
But you need to get over yourself. Okay?

1590
01:08:21,490 --> 01:08:23,618
Now go down there and
be happy with your kids.

1591
01:08:23,690 --> 01:08:27,331
No! A scalper gouged me 18 grand
for these seats. I'm not leaving them!

1592
01:08:28,050 --> 01:08:29,176
What?

1593
01:08:29,450 --> 01:08:31,418
What did you just say?

1594
01:08:31,490 --> 01:08:34,573
Yeah. Nothing. Let's just... You're right.

1595
01:08:35,210 --> 01:08:37,577
I'm so much more relaxed now.
Thank you.

1596
01:08:38,050 --> 01:08:39,461
Yeah. Let's just go down... Let's just...

1597
01:08:39,530 --> 01:08:40,531
No!

1598
01:08:40,650 --> 01:08:43,540
I think you should sit
in your $18,000 seats,

1599
01:08:43,650 --> 01:08:47,018
and think of all the better ways
your family could have used that money.

1600
01:08:48,730 --> 01:08:49,891
Sara.

1601
01:08:51,370 --> 01:08:52,815
The guy from the nuclear sub thing?

1602
01:08:52,890 --> 01:08:54,813
- Mayron! That's him.
- That's the guy?

1603
01:08:54,890 --> 01:08:58,019
Can I get some beers down here?
Can I get five beers?

1604
01:08:59,050 --> 01:09:00,540
Excuse me, some beers!

1605
01:09:37,410 --> 01:09:39,094
What's up, everybody?

1606
01:09:39,450 --> 01:09:42,374
Let's make some noise!

1607
01:09:42,450 --> 01:09:44,020
Whoo-hoo!

1608
01:09:44,090 --> 01:09:47,458
Tonight, one lucky fan is going to

1609
01:09:47,530 --> 01:09:50,056
get a chance to shoot from half court

1610
01:09:50,250 --> 01:09:53,857
to win a family vacation
to Disney World!

1611
01:09:57,290 --> 01:10:00,772
And our lucky fan is sitting in

1612
01:10:00,850 --> 01:10:03,091
section 113,

1613
01:10:03,450 --> 01:10:05,020
row 6,

1614
01:10:05,330 --> 01:10:08,857
C-1. Where is he?
Let's see it. Where is he?

1615
01:10:08,930 --> 01:10:10,534
It's me. It's me, I win!

1616
01:10:10,610 --> 01:10:11,975
- There he is.
- I win.

1617
01:10:13,130 --> 01:10:15,781
I'm-a make it to Disneyland.
I'm-a make it all right.

1618
01:10:15,850 --> 01:10:17,215
- All right, Brad!
- Yay, Brad!

1619
01:10:17,290 --> 01:10:18,416
Yay, Brad!

1620
01:10:18,970 --> 01:10:20,654
All right, sir, how you doing?
What's your name?

1621
01:10:20,970 --> 01:10:23,291
First off, I love my kids.

1622
01:10:23,690 --> 01:10:25,294
He loves his kids! Let's give it up!

1623
01:10:27,810 --> 01:10:31,132
And if anyone was ever
to do anything to them,

1624
01:10:31,370 --> 01:10:33,532
- I would hurt them.
- Oka y.

1625
01:10:33,970 --> 01:10:35,972
I would freakin' hurt them!

1626
01:10:36,490 --> 01:10:37,821
Okay.

1627
01:10:38,170 --> 01:10:40,457
This guy over here
is trying to take them!

1628
01:10:40,650 --> 01:10:42,334
Trying to steal my family.

1629
01:10:42,650 --> 01:10:44,334
He doesn't sweat!

1630
01:10:45,170 --> 01:10:46,581
Okay, you know what?
Why don't we just shoot...

1631
01:10:46,650 --> 01:10:48,493
But I got news for you, buddy!

1632
01:10:48,850 --> 01:10:51,421
Last night, while you were sleeping,

1633
01:10:51,490 --> 01:10:53,140
I made love to our wife!

1634
01:10:53,450 --> 01:10:54,815
- Okay_
'My wife!

1635
01:10:55,490 --> 01:10:57,697
Sara, right over there!

1636
01:10:58,250 --> 01:11:00,139
Took my wiener out of my pants!

1637
01:11:00,210 --> 01:11:02,099
This is a family event, okay?

1638
01:11:02,170 --> 01:11:03,854
- Boo! Boo!
- All right.

1639
01:11:04,010 --> 01:11:05,171
So,

1640
01:11:05,690 --> 01:11:08,853
even if Sara does pick you,
you're going to have to be

1641
01:11:09,130 --> 01:11:11,132
the stepdad to my kid!

1642
01:11:11,290 --> 01:11:13,896
You see how you like it! Okay?

1643
01:11:14,050 --> 01:11:16,576
Let's get somebody else
down here, all right? Somebody else...

1644
01:11:16,650 --> 01:11:18,459
Somebody else is going to win
a family trip!

1645
01:11:18,530 --> 01:11:19,861
Give me that ball, you.

1646
01:11:20,170 --> 01:11:23,333
This one's for Dylan and Megan
and Sara and Dylan.

1647
01:11:23,850 --> 01:11:25,375
Nothing but net.

1648
01:11:25,690 --> 01:11:27,897
All right, he's going for it!
Nothing but net!

1649
01:11:36,210 --> 01:11:37,211
Do-over!

1650
01:11:37,370 --> 01:11:39,020
- That's a do-over!
- No do-over. No.

1651
01:11:39,090 --> 01:11:40,421
It's a do-over!

1652
01:12:04,890 --> 01:12:08,178
I'm so sorry
you had to see that. I'm so sorry.

1653
01:12:44,090 --> 01:12:46,457
Hey, kids, why don't you go inside
and put on your pajamas?

1654
01:12:49,970 --> 01:12:52,576
- What are you doing?
- I'm comforting you.

1655
01:12:53,930 --> 01:12:57,218
Sara, look... Sorry, too soon. I know.

1656
01:12:57,290 --> 01:12:59,292
But I just want you to know
that I'm here for you and the kids.

1657
01:12:59,810 --> 01:13:02,461
Oh, really? You want to be
a real parent now? Is that what this is?

1658
01:13:02,610 --> 01:13:03,736
Absolutely. I'm here now.

1659
01:13:03,810 --> 01:13:05,858
Dusty, I'm working
crazy hours this week.

1660
01:13:05,930 --> 01:13:08,331
With Brad gone, the kids
are gonna have to be dropped off,

1661
01:13:08,450 --> 01:13:10,339
picked up, taken to swimming lessons.

1662
01:13:10,570 --> 01:13:13,016
Dylan has a play date
with Eli on Tuesday,

1663
01:13:13,090 --> 01:13:15,491
and Megan has a dentist
appointment on Friday.

1664
01:13:15,610 --> 01:13:17,931
Sara, I know in the past
I've been unreliable,

1665
01:13:18,210 --> 01:13:20,577
but this is a new me. All right?
This is the new Dusty.

1666
01:13:21,650 --> 01:13:24,130
Well, you can't take them
to school on a motorcycle.

1667
01:13:24,210 --> 01:13:25,621
- You need a car.
- Done.

1668
01:13:26,810 --> 01:13:28,016
Okay.

1669
01:13:30,810 --> 01:13:32,494
Hey! You're not staying here!

1670
01:13:32,570 --> 01:13:33,981
Are you sure you don't need
company right now?

1671
01:13:34,050 --> 01:13:35,415
I mean, you're going through
a tough transition here.

1672
01:13:35,490 --> 01:13:36,980
Be here at 6:30
tomorrow morning.

1673
01:13:37,090 --> 01:13:38,455
Well, can I at least
come in and get my stuff?

1674
01:13:38,530 --> 01:13:39,577
No!

1675
01:13:39,690 --> 01:13:42,296
I'm gonna wait for a while,
in case you change your mind.

1676
01:13:47,010 --> 01:13:48,136
Hey-

1677
01:13:48,850 --> 01:13:49,897
Oh...

1678
01:13:49,970 --> 01:13:51,574
What did you throw Griff out for?

1679
01:13:53,370 --> 01:13:54,974
This place is chaotic.

1680
01:13:55,330 --> 01:13:57,094
There's always some bullshit
going on in that house.

1681
01:13:57,170 --> 01:13:59,218
God, man.
Want to go to the Red Roof Inn?

1682
01:13:59,330 --> 01:14:00,377
Let's do it.

1683
01:14:00,690 --> 01:14:01,816
Is that Cinnamon Toast Crunch?

1684
01:14:01,890 --> 01:14:03,221
Yes, sir.

1685
01:14:27,770 --> 01:14:29,260
Okay. No running!

1686
01:14:29,330 --> 01:14:31,697
All right. Lindsey! Sloane!
Car's open right down there!

1687
01:14:31,810 --> 01:14:35,610
Okay, sir, inside the cones!
Just like ice cream!

1688
01:14:35,690 --> 01:14:36,896
Keep it inside...

1689
01:14:36,970 --> 01:14:38,460
That's right! Thank you.

1690
01:14:44,250 --> 01:14:47,459
Hi. I see you've been picking up
Megan and Dylan these past few days.

1691
01:14:47,530 --> 01:14:49,020
Should I expect you from now on?

1692
01:14:49,090 --> 01:14:51,457
Um, yeah, I'm their real dad,
so yeah, from now on.

1693
01:14:51,610 --> 01:14:53,339
Terrific. I see that you also

1694
01:14:53,410 --> 01:14:55,492
haven't signed up to
volunteer in the lane.

1695
01:14:55,570 --> 01:14:58,221
Brad was so good about
helping us out in the lane,

1696
01:14:58,370 --> 01:15:00,054
in the classroom, PTA, and so forth.

1697
01:15:00,130 --> 01:15:02,451
We could always count on him
for bake sales, Spring Sing,

1698
01:15:02,530 --> 01:15:04,532
costumes for Winter Pageant.
You know the drill.

1699
01:15:04,650 --> 01:15:06,539
I hope I can count on you
to be the new Brad.

1700
01:15:06,970 --> 01:15:08,734
Ah, sure, yeah. You can count on me.

1701
01:15:08,850 --> 01:15:11,501
I mean, I'm their real dad,
so, yeah, I'll be here every day.

1702
01:15:11,570 --> 01:15:14,335
Great. So, if your kids aren't out here,
I'm gonna need you to circle around

1703
01:15:14,450 --> 01:15:15,497
to the back of the line. Okay?

1704
01:15:15,570 --> 01:15:17,493
- No, I can't go around.
- Thanks.

1705
01:15:17,570 --> 01:15:18,935
I came ten minutes early
so I don't have to...

1706
01:15:19,010 --> 01:15:21,058
If your kids aren't here,
you have to go around!

1707
01:15:21,170 --> 01:15:22,979
I know. There's somebody
in front of me. Okay?

1708
01:15:23,050 --> 01:15:24,051
Just go around!

1709
01:15:24,170 --> 01:15:26,332
I can't just go over the
cones! I'm boxed in here!

1710
01:15:26,410 --> 01:15:28,094
- Go around!
- No, you can't! Okay?

1711
01:15:28,250 --> 01:15:29,661
She said stay in the cone,
like ice cream!

1712
01:15:29,730 --> 01:15:31,300
Go around!

1713
01:15:31,410 --> 01:15:32,571
Inside the cones!

1714
01:15:32,850 --> 01:15:34,261
Amanda has got a recital!

1715
01:15:34,370 --> 01:15:36,941
I have to get there! You need to go!

1716
01:15:42,650 --> 01:15:44,493
Hey!

1717
01:15:44,570 --> 01:15:47,016
We always stay inside the cones!

1718
01:15:47,410 --> 01:15:49,572
Cones!

1719
01:15:50,290 --> 01:15:52,179
Cones! Come on!

1720
01:15:56,930 --> 01:15:59,900
Have you been living here
for the last few days, Brad?

1721
01:16:00,090 --> 01:16:01,091
No.

1722
01:16:01,930 --> 01:16:06,299
Then what's with the blankets
and the hot plate

1723
01:16:06,930 --> 01:16:08,056
and the B.O.?

1724
01:16:08,610 --> 01:16:11,341
I crapped in the wastebasket.

1725
01:16:12,130 --> 01:16:15,771
You know, Brad, two years
into my thing with Charlene,

1726
01:16:16,130 --> 01:16:18,974
her first husband showed up.
Oriental fellow.

1727
01:16:19,250 --> 01:16:22,140
You can't say that.
You cannot say "Oriental."

1728
01:16:22,250 --> 01:16:26,255
His name was Yu or Wu.
It could have been Javier.

1729
01:16:26,610 --> 01:16:29,978
Anyway, I get off early one day,
get home, and

1730
01:16:30,250 --> 01:16:32,332
there he is, stark naked in our bed.

1731
01:16:32,650 --> 01:16:33,856
I didn't know what to think.

1732
01:16:33,930 --> 01:16:36,615
Really? You didn't know what to think?

1733
01:16:36,810 --> 01:16:40,132
Six months later,
I wake up in a Chinese prison

1734
01:16:40,490 --> 01:16:42,697
with a tattoo on my lower back

1735
01:16:42,810 --> 01:16:44,972
of a golf ball rolling
towards my butthole.

1736
01:16:45,290 --> 01:16:47,258
I can't hear these stories anymore.

1737
01:16:47,330 --> 01:16:49,298
I'm sorry. I know they're
supposed to help...

1738
01:16:49,490 --> 01:16:51,492
Griff! What are you doing here?

1739
01:16:51,810 --> 01:16:53,938
Thought you should know
Dusty came by the bar earlier.

1740
01:16:54,410 --> 01:16:56,253
He was talking about how
he can't do the daddy thing.

1741
01:16:56,330 --> 01:16:57,741
I tried to talk some sense into him,

1742
01:16:57,810 --> 01:16:59,574
but he seemed determined
to get out of town.

1743
01:16:59,650 --> 01:17:00,651
What, he's leaving?

1744
01:17:00,770 --> 01:17:03,580
I don't think I have to tell you,
but little Megan's dance is tonight,

1745
01:17:04,050 --> 01:17:05,290
and she's not going to have a daddy.

1746
01:17:05,370 --> 01:17:08,180
That's fantastic. Brad, you win.

1747
01:17:08,330 --> 01:17:11,777
And Dusty, because of
an act of cowardice, loses.

1748
01:17:12,170 --> 01:17:14,013
I mean, you're the daddy again.

1749
01:17:14,330 --> 01:17:16,014
Come on, hit that.

1750
01:17:20,690 --> 01:17:22,135
No, I'm not her daddy.

1751
01:17:23,850 --> 01:17:26,376
I wish more than anything I was,

1752
01:17:27,650 --> 01:17:28,697
but I'm not.

1753
01:17:28,970 --> 01:17:33,373
Yeah, you're right, Brad. A real dad
wouldn't give up on his kids so easy.

1754
01:17:42,690 --> 01:17:43,691
Griff!

1755
01:17:43,890 --> 01:17:45,733
Wait!

1756
01:17:46,050 --> 01:17:47,540
He's still in the room, Brad.

1757
01:17:47,890 --> 01:17:49,380
Oh, hey.

1758
01:17:49,850 --> 01:17:52,057
Sorry. I thought you stormed out.

1759
01:17:52,370 --> 01:17:56,011
What you said sounded like a storm-out,
and then I heard the door close.

1760
01:17:56,210 --> 01:17:57,974
I just thought that shit
was getting kind of personal,

1761
01:17:58,050 --> 01:17:59,734
so it'd be good to close the door.

1762
01:18:00,010 --> 01:18:03,378
So extremely thoughtful.
Thank you. Yeah.

1763
01:18:03,570 --> 01:18:07,052
And just so you know
where my head was at,

1764
01:18:07,130 --> 01:18:09,497
I was going to chase you
down the hallway. Right?

1765
01:18:10,050 --> 01:18:12,974
You'd hear my footsteps and you're like,
"ls someone after... What's going on?"

1766
01:18:13,050 --> 01:18:17,260
Boom! It's me, and I'm like, "Griff, hey!

1767
01:18:17,570 --> 01:18:18,856
"You were right."

1768
01:18:18,930 --> 01:18:22,412
Holy shit! That would be so uplifting.

1769
01:18:23,570 --> 01:18:24,571
Can we do that?

1770
01:18:25,570 --> 01:18:27,811
Griff, can you storm out, and Brad,
you go after him?

1771
01:18:27,890 --> 01:18:29,813
I don't really want any part of that.

1772
01:18:29,930 --> 01:18:32,331
That sounds like pure nonsense to me.

1773
01:18:32,410 --> 01:18:34,697
I don't want... I'd rather not.

1774
01:18:35,170 --> 01:18:37,411
We could just try it, you know?

1775
01:18:37,610 --> 01:18:41,251
No, that sounds forced
and weird to try to

1776
01:18:41,610 --> 01:18:44,181
recreate something.
Not even recreate.

1777
01:18:44,250 --> 01:18:46,252
It would be creating. It didn't happen.

1778
01:18:46,610 --> 01:18:48,294
It's over-discussed at this point.

1779
01:18:48,570 --> 01:18:49,537
Shouldn't you go see your kid?

1780
01:18:49,610 --> 01:18:51,100
- Yeah. Yeah.
- All right.

1781
01:18:51,410 --> 01:18:52,935
You guys go. Brad, can I come?

1782
01:18:53,050 --> 01:18:54,051
No.

1783
01:19:07,450 --> 01:19:09,293
Daddy's not coming, is he?

1784
01:19:09,450 --> 01:19:13,136
Oh, honey, he'll be here. He promised.

1785
01:19:14,730 --> 01:19:16,778
I see cupcakes over there.

1786
01:19:17,570 --> 01:19:20,096
I think you should go eat some. Go on.

1787
01:19:21,130 --> 01:19:22,655
Go eat a lot of sugar.

1788
01:19:38,090 --> 01:19:39,091
Dusty.

1789
01:19:40,170 --> 01:19:42,491
- Nope.
- Come on, Dusty.

1790
01:19:42,810 --> 01:19:43,891
Where are you going?

1791
01:19:44,010 --> 01:19:46,297
I'd pay a billion dollars
to take her to that dance.

1792
01:19:46,370 --> 01:19:48,179
- You're just gonna leave?
- You take her then.

1793
01:19:48,290 --> 01:19:50,577
I can't take her. Okay?
I'm not welcome after I said

1794
01:19:50,650 --> 01:19:52,254
I was gonna put a spite baby
in her mother.

1795
01:19:52,330 --> 01:19:54,253
- I guess that's out, then.
- Yeah, that is out.

1796
01:19:54,330 --> 01:19:56,173
So it's gotta be you.

1797
01:19:56,490 --> 01:19:59,380
I'm sorry, Brad,
I just can't do it, all right?

1798
01:19:59,450 --> 01:20:00,895
What do you mean, you can't do it?

1799
01:20:00,970 --> 01:20:02,813
I can't stay inside the cones.

1800
01:20:02,890 --> 01:20:04,972
Look, Dusty, the cones are
there for everyone's safety.

1801
01:20:05,050 --> 01:20:07,735
- It's not about the cones.
- You just said it was.

1802
01:20:07,810 --> 01:20:09,255
The cones are a metaphor, Brad.

1803
01:20:09,370 --> 01:20:11,452
I'm not the domestic type, okay?

1804
01:20:11,930 --> 01:20:13,375
Dusty, come on.
What are you talking about?

1805
01:20:13,450 --> 01:20:15,691
You're organized, you're handy.

1806
01:20:15,770 --> 01:20:18,137
You make the best cinnamon rolls
I have ever tasted.

1807
01:20:18,210 --> 01:20:19,450
Those were Cinnabons, Brad. Come on.

1808
01:20:19,530 --> 01:20:21,419
You can't make rolls like that
in a conventional oven.

1809
01:20:21,490 --> 01:20:24,858
I knew it! I knew it.
I knew it from the beginning!

1810
01:20:25,450 --> 01:20:26,781
So you've been telling
some tall tales, huh?

1811
01:20:26,850 --> 01:20:29,171
- All that Special Ops stuff.
- No, just the Cinnabons!

1812
01:20:29,250 --> 01:20:30,900
Why would you lie about Cinnabons?

1813
01:20:30,970 --> 01:20:32,813
'Cause I wanted to win. All right?

1814
01:20:32,890 --> 01:20:34,972
I wanted to prove that
I was a good dad, too, but I'm not.

1815
01:20:35,210 --> 01:20:37,531
Okay? Are you happy?
Is that what you want to hear?

1816
01:20:37,650 --> 01:20:39,891
All the noise and the mess
and all the choices.

1817
01:20:39,970 --> 01:20:41,460
You do one thing wrong,
you can screw them up for life.

1818
01:20:41,570 --> 01:20:44,301
- Do you realize that?
- Yeah.

1819
01:20:44,730 --> 01:20:46,095
Dads have to make
a lot of choices, okay?

1820
01:20:46,170 --> 01:20:47,376
And we blow most of them.

1821
01:20:47,490 --> 01:20:48,651
Yeah, and the other parents.

1822
01:20:48,730 --> 01:20:51,654
That kid, Eli. I was over there
for a play date. You know about this?

1823
01:20:51,730 --> 01:20:53,494
You can't just ride your bike
over to a friend's house,

1824
01:20:53,570 --> 01:20:54,571
to play Hot Wheels anymore,

1825
01:20:54,650 --> 01:20:55,981
now you got to make some kind of date?

1826
01:20:56,050 --> 01:20:57,461
- I know, it's a shame.
- Well, I'm over there,

1827
01:20:57,570 --> 01:20:59,618
and the kid's dad keeps
asking me if Dylan's gonna be

1828
01:20:59,690 --> 01:21:00,851
in the gifted program with Eli.

1829
01:21:00,930 --> 01:21:02,898
Like Dylan isn't as smart as
his little ball-scratcher kid.

1830
01:21:02,970 --> 01:21:04,734
I wanted to murder that smug prick.

1831
01:21:04,810 --> 01:21:08,019
Dusty, look, I hate that guy, too, okay?

1832
01:21:08,090 --> 01:21:10,741
But his son is Dylan's best friend,
so you suck it up.

1833
01:21:12,010 --> 01:21:17,221
I mean, that's most of
what dads do, is take shit.

1834
01:21:17,290 --> 01:21:19,213
I mean, that's what we do.

1835
01:21:19,330 --> 01:21:22,174
I can't do it, Brad.
I can't take shit like you do.

1836
01:21:22,250 --> 01:21:24,457
You take shit better than
anyone I've ever met,

1837
01:21:24,570 --> 01:21:26,698
and I mean that as a compliment
from the bottom of my heart.

1838
01:21:26,810 --> 01:21:28,539
- Thank you.
- But I'm sorry, Brad. I can't.

1839
01:21:28,610 --> 01:21:30,260
I can't do it, man.

1840
01:21:30,330 --> 01:21:32,378
You made a promise to Megan,
and you're gonna keep it.

1841
01:21:37,250 --> 01:21:38,536
Ow!

1842
01:21:41,370 --> 01:21:43,213
Did you just punch me
in the face, Brad?

1843
01:21:43,330 --> 01:21:44,331
Ow, yes.

1844
01:21:44,690 --> 01:21:47,136
Knowing full well I got no choice
but to bust you up now?

1845
01:21:47,370 --> 01:21:48,974
I really wish you wouldn't.

1846
01:21:49,450 --> 01:21:51,976
If I did, you'd take that beatdown
for those kids, wouldn't you?

1847
01:21:53,770 --> 01:21:56,296
Yeah. Yeah, I would.

1848
01:22:04,890 --> 01:22:07,131
- Come on.
- Good luck, Dusty.

1849
01:22:07,570 --> 01:22:09,220
What? No, no, you gotta come.

1850
01:22:09,890 --> 01:22:13,781
It's just... I can't see Sara
after what I said.

1851
01:22:13,850 --> 01:22:15,978
Sara loves you, Brad. All right?
I know just what to say to her.

1852
01:22:16,050 --> 01:22:17,814
You just stand there
and look lost without her.

1853
01:22:17,890 --> 01:22:20,052
- I am lost without her.
- Well, that's good. Then let's go.

1854
01:22:20,210 --> 01:22:22,861
- But I look terrible.
- Yeah, you do. Come here.

1855
01:22:22,970 --> 01:22:24,938
- What are you doing?
- I'm fixing you up, man.

1856
01:22:27,250 --> 01:22:28,854
Dusty, get your hands out of my pants.

1857
01:22:28,930 --> 01:22:31,251
Calm down. Think I want to
touch your little dinky?

1858
01:22:31,330 --> 01:22:32,456
I'm trying to fix you up.

1859
01:22:33,810 --> 01:22:35,175
All right. Let me see.

1860
01:22:37,250 --> 01:22:39,776
Wow. I look great.

1861
01:22:39,850 --> 01:22:41,181
Here you go.

1862
01:22:41,250 --> 01:22:43,252
- That's incredible.
- Come on.

1863
01:22:49,250 --> 01:22:50,854
Hey, pumpkin.

1864
01:22:50,930 --> 01:22:54,616
Daddy wanted to be here,
I know he did. He just gets...

1865
01:23:07,650 --> 01:23:08,981
Whoa, whoa, whoa... Uh-oh.

1866
01:23:09,210 --> 01:23:11,053
She's doing her arms-folded thing.

1867
01:23:11,130 --> 01:23:15,692
You said she'd smile.
Maybe even start a slow clap.

1868
01:23:15,770 --> 01:23:17,374
Don't worry, I got this. Okay? Come on.

1869
01:23:18,130 --> 01:23:21,452
Oh, hey, look, it's the guy that
stranded his kids at school.

1870
01:23:21,730 --> 01:23:22,970
And look who he's with.

1871
01:23:23,050 --> 01:23:24,973
Did you get anybody pregnant
on your way over here, Brad?

1872
01:23:25,050 --> 01:23:26,131
No, I didn't.

1873
01:23:26,210 --> 01:23:27,735
- Sara, listen...
- No!

1874
01:23:27,850 --> 01:23:29,739
- Sara, please.
- No. I am not going to listen to you.

1875
01:23:29,810 --> 01:23:32,893
You know what? Your daughter's been
sitting there for two hours, heartbroken.

1876
01:23:32,970 --> 01:23:35,291
Sara, I am so sorry...

1877
01:23:35,570 --> 01:23:39,336
Oh, just, please. Will one of you idiots
just ask your daughter to dance?

1878
01:23:39,570 --> 01:23:40,901
- Really?
- Yes.

1879
01:23:41,330 --> 01:23:43,901
Neither one of you deserves her,
butyes.

1880
01:23:46,650 --> 01:23:48,414
- Go ahead, Dusty.
- No, you take the first one.

1881
01:23:48,490 --> 01:23:49,616
You've earned it more than I have.

1882
01:23:49,690 --> 01:23:51,260
Dusty, please, she's your daughter.

1883
01:23:51,330 --> 01:23:52,456
What the hell did I miss?

1884
01:23:53,650 --> 01:23:57,496
I'll tell you what. I'll vouch for you
to the kids and I'll take the first dance.

1885
01:23:57,570 --> 01:24:00,176
I'll say my good-byes,
and then I'll get out of your hair.

1886
01:24:02,170 --> 01:24:04,696
Wait, wait. When you say
"get out of your hair,"

1887
01:24:04,770 --> 01:24:06,932
you mean leave,
like leave-leave? Tonight?

1888
01:24:07,010 --> 01:24:09,695
Daddy! Brad!
The fourth graders are here.

1889
01:24:09,770 --> 01:24:11,534
They're picking on Dylan again.

1890
01:24:11,850 --> 01:24:14,012
That's it.
Those little shitheads are dead.

1891
01:24:14,090 --> 01:24:15,216
Where are they?

1892
01:24:16,890 --> 01:24:18,255
Those are the fourth graders?

1893
01:24:18,370 --> 01:24:20,976
- They're girls.
- Uh-huh. They're so mean.

1894
01:24:21,090 --> 01:24:22,854
Why are you even here at
the Daddy-Daughter Dance?

1895
01:24:22,930 --> 01:24:24,580
Are you a daughter? Are you a girl?

1896
01:24:24,650 --> 01:24:27,699
Are you too scared to take me on
without your little friends?

1897
01:24:27,770 --> 01:24:29,374
- Oh, no, he's calling out the big one.
- Oh-oh.

1898
01:24:29,450 --> 01:24:30,451
Oh, no, no, no.

1899
01:24:31,690 --> 01:24:32,691
Come on!

1900
01:24:33,250 --> 01:24:34,331
Dylan!

1901
01:24:34,970 --> 01:24:36,301
Yes!

1902
01:24:36,530 --> 01:24:39,215
- Dylan, what are you doing?
- Did you see? Did you see?

1903
01:24:39,290 --> 01:24:40,735
I punched her in the face,
just like you taught me.

1904
01:24:40,850 --> 01:24:42,579
- What?
- And then I kicked her right in the nuts.

1905
01:24:42,650 --> 01:24:44,175
You like that, bitch? Huh?

1906
01:24:44,290 --> 01:24:45,780
- No, no, no!
- You want some more, bitch?

1907
01:24:46,130 --> 01:24:48,531
Sweetheart, what happened?
What's going on here?

1908
01:24:48,650 --> 01:24:50,220
He punched me in the face.

1909
01:24:50,330 --> 01:24:52,059
Then he kicked me in the swimsuit area.

1910
01:24:52,130 --> 01:24:53,973
Then he called me the "B" word.

1911
01:24:54,050 --> 01:24:55,211
Who did, him?

1912
01:24:55,290 --> 01:24:57,179
He did. I saw it.
He said they taught him to hit girls.

1913
01:24:57,290 --> 01:24:59,497
No, no. We thought
your daughter was a boy.

1914
01:24:59,610 --> 01:25:01,055
- What?
- No, what he means is that

1915
01:25:01,130 --> 01:25:02,973
Dylan told us that a fourth grader
was picking on him,

1916
01:25:03,050 --> 01:25:04,415
but he didn't tell us it was a girl.

1917
01:25:04,490 --> 01:25:06,891
Yeah, and if you had, we'd have told you
it's never okay to hit a girl.

1918
01:25:06,970 --> 01:25:08,051
And that she's probably
only bugging you

1919
01:25:08,170 --> 01:25:09,251
because she likes you, buddy.

1920
01:25:09,490 --> 01:25:11,254
I do not like him.

1921
01:25:11,490 --> 01:25:12,901
Oh, I think she likes him.

1922
01:25:12,970 --> 01:25:14,654
Ah, gross, whatever.

1923
01:25:14,770 --> 01:25:16,135
She totally does.

1924
01:25:16,210 --> 01:25:17,541
Are you calling my daughter a whore?

1925
01:25:17,610 --> 01:25:19,260
- What?
- They were implying it, Jerry.

1926
01:25:19,330 --> 01:25:20,456
Wait. That's quite a stretch.

1927
01:25:20,730 --> 01:25:22,732
Mrs. Troy, please. I got this.

1928
01:25:23,010 --> 01:25:25,092
Wait, first of all, which one
of you two is the kid's dad?

1929
01:25:25,410 --> 01:25:26,491
They both are.

1930
01:25:27,770 --> 01:25:29,772
9h, my gosh. Wow!

1931
01:25:30,170 --> 01:25:33,333
I'm sorry. That's the first time
he's ever referred to me as Dad.

1932
01:25:34,010 --> 01:25:35,694
It's something I've wanted
to hear for a long time,

1933
01:25:35,810 --> 01:25:37,574
so it's a bit poignant.

1934
01:25:37,650 --> 01:25:39,812
I tend to cry a lot

1935
01:25:40,170 --> 01:25:43,617
when things get emotional.
They tease me all the time.

1936
01:25:43,690 --> 01:25:45,454
- I'm actually the stepdad.
- Oh, is that right?

1937
01:25:45,530 --> 01:25:46,861
So you're the real dad, huh!

1938
01:25:47,770 --> 01:25:49,499
Hey. You don't want to
embarrass yourself, buddy.

1939
01:25:49,570 --> 01:25:51,334
You threatening me now, tough guy?

1940
01:25:51,410 --> 01:25:53,651
- He's threatening you, Jerry.
- Nobody's threatening anybody.

1941
01:25:53,770 --> 01:25:55,340
But you're gonna want to
back that up, Jerry.

1942
01:25:55,410 --> 01:25:56,935
And you, Squidward tie.
Quit being an instigator,

1943
01:25:57,050 --> 01:25:58,620
or I'm gonna have to
rap you in the mouth.

1944
01:25:59,850 --> 01:26:01,978
Hey, hey, hey. Everyonejust calm down.

1945
01:26:02,050 --> 01:26:03,381
We're at the Daddy-Daughter Dance.

1946
01:26:03,490 --> 01:26:05,174
You stay out of it, all right?
You don't count!

1947
01:26:05,250 --> 01:26:06,820
I want to talk to the real dad here.

1948
01:26:06,930 --> 01:26:09,058
Hey, Brad here is more of
a real dad than any of us.

1949
01:26:09,130 --> 01:26:10,734
You ever want to see
how you should be raising your kids,

1950
01:26:10,810 --> 01:26:11,891
go look at this guy.

1951
01:26:12,650 --> 01:26:15,301
Here I go again. What did I tell you?

1952
01:26:15,970 --> 01:26:18,974
- Really? You mean that?
- Yes, I do, Brad.

1953
01:26:19,050 --> 01:26:20,131
You're a great dad.

1954
01:26:23,410 --> 01:26:24,536
- Like that?
- You shouldn't have done that.

1955
01:26:24,610 --> 01:26:25,771
Yeah? Why?

1956
01:26:25,850 --> 01:26:27,454
I'm pretty sure he kills people for a job.

1957
01:26:27,810 --> 01:26:31,132
He's been rather vague with me,
but that's what I'm kind of surmising.

1958
01:26:31,330 --> 01:26:32,855
- Are we gonna do this?
- Oh, we're gonna do it.

1959
01:26:32,930 --> 01:26:34,500
- Okay. You ready?
- Yeah, I'm ready.

1960
01:26:34,570 --> 01:26:36,254
- This is what you get.
- Daddy.

1961
01:26:46,930 --> 01:26:48,261
Want another one? Come on in.

1962
01:26:51,570 --> 01:26:52,776
What's going on?

1963
01:26:55,410 --> 01:26:56,900
Is this like some UFC shit?

1964
01:26:57,010 --> 01:26:58,011
Come on, Brad.

1965
01:26:58,090 --> 01:26:59,421
That's right. It's a dance, Jerry.

1966
01:26:59,530 --> 01:27:01,851
Yeah. So dance, Jerry!

1967
01:27:06,850 --> 01:27:10,093
Yeah! You just got served, Jerry!

1968
01:27:10,170 --> 01:27:12,013
You just got a piping hot serving.

1969
01:27:12,090 --> 01:27:14,821
I'm not getting served.
You're getting sewed!

1970
01:27:14,890 --> 01:27:18,372
You don't know this about me, Jerry,
but I like to move my body.

1971
01:27:20,010 --> 01:27:21,660
Get it, Brad!

1972
01:27:27,290 --> 01:27:28,701
Yeah! Yeah, Brad!

1973
01:27:32,890 --> 01:27:34,733
This is a dance! Let's go!

1974
01:27:52,810 --> 01:27:54,653
Am I the only one with my shirt off?

1975
01:27:56,890 --> 01:27:58,415
You know you can't leave, right?

1976
01:27:58,810 --> 01:27:59,811
You want me to stay?

1977
01:27:59,930 --> 01:28:02,410
These guys are growing up so fast.
You don't want to miss it.

1978
01:28:03,890 --> 01:28:05,494
You're sweating profusely.

1979
01:28:05,730 --> 01:28:08,097
- I know. I sweat a lot.
- That's cool.

1980
01:28:10,090 --> 01:28:11,171
Thank you.

1981
01:28:44,050 --> 01:28:45,734
So Dusty did stay.

1982
01:28:46,370 --> 01:28:47,815
And with the huge amount of money

1983
01:28:47,930 --> 01:28:49,773
he was making as
the voice of The Panda,

1984
01:28:49,890 --> 01:28:51,176
he built his own new castle

1985
01:28:51,250 --> 01:28:52,740
right down the street.

1986
01:28:53,890 --> 01:28:55,051
Hey!

1987
01:28:55,650 --> 01:28:58,540
But we kept Tumor because he didn't
get along with Dusty's new puppy.

1988
01:29:01,050 --> 01:29:03,052
It turns out Tumor was only five...

1989
01:29:03,330 --> 01:29:04,820
so we're going to have him

1990
01:29:04,890 --> 01:29:06,540
for a long, long time.

1991
01:29:06,730 --> 01:29:08,653
Tumor!

1992
01:29:08,890 --> 01:29:10,574
And I was more than a little surprised

1993
01:29:10,690 --> 01:29:13,694
when Dusty showed up one day
with his new wife

1994
01:29:14,410 --> 01:29:15,571
and his new stepdaughter.

1995
01:29:15,850 --> 01:29:17,534
This is my stepdaughter, Adriana.

1996
01:29:17,610 --> 01:29:19,260
- Hey, Adriana. I'm Brad.
- Want to go play?

1997
01:29:19,730 --> 01:29:21,619
That's your brother and sister.
You guys play nice, okay?

1998
01:29:21,690 --> 01:29:22,976
Hey, hon. Who's at the door?

1999
01:29:23,090 --> 01:29:24,819
Oh, hey, Sara. This is my wife, Karen.

2000
01:29:24,890 --> 01:29:26,574
Oh, is it... Your wife?

2001
01:29:27,090 --> 01:29:30,651
That Karen, wow, she is so great.

2002
01:29:30,730 --> 01:29:32,300
It turns out she's

2003
01:29:32,410 --> 01:29:35,892
a doctor and a celebrated
novelist. I mean—

2004
01:29:36,410 --> 01:29:37,571
Hon, would you...

2005
01:29:37,930 --> 01:29:41,412
- Come here, Griff. Come here, Griff. Oh!
- He's so cute.

2006
01:29:41,930 --> 01:29:45,298
And I was so surprised when
I found out that we're the same age.

2007
01:29:46,250 --> 01:29:48,457
I mean, she looks so young, right?

2008
01:29:49,050 --> 01:29:50,176
Good for her!

2009
01:29:50,250 --> 01:29:52,173
Honey, you look amazing tonight.

2010
01:29:52,250 --> 01:29:53,695
What are you talking about?

2011
01:29:53,770 --> 01:29:56,091
It's just my normal clothes.
That's how I look.

2012
01:29:56,170 --> 01:29:57,854
I just got ready really fast.

2013
01:29:58,370 --> 01:30:00,259
Hey, Griff. Hey, little Griffy.

2014
01:30:00,370 --> 01:30:01,531
You want to come to Daddy?

2015
01:30:01,610 --> 01:30:03,453
What, you think I'm going to
pick his pockets or something?

2016
01:30:03,530 --> 01:30:05,134
- No.
- He doesn't carry a wallet.

2017
01:30:05,210 --> 01:30:06,860
Oh, sweetie, be careful
with that knife, okay?

2018
01:30:06,930 --> 01:30:07,931
You're not my dad.

2019
01:30:09,050 --> 01:30:10,051
Brad was right.

2020
01:30:10,130 --> 01:30:11,700
Being a stepdad isn't always easy.

2021
01:30:11,970 --> 01:30:14,211
But he was also right that it's worth it.

2022
01:30:14,370 --> 01:30:16,532
And he was right about
the Ford Flex, too.

2023
01:30:16,690 --> 01:30:18,215
It's a great family car.

2024
01:30:18,290 --> 01:30:21,453
Got plenty of room for the kids,
gear, and plenty of pickup for me.

2025
01:30:21,650 --> 01:30:23,140
I got the Weekender package.

2026
01:30:23,210 --> 01:30:25,053
A few more bells and
whistles than Brad's,

2027
01:30:25,210 --> 01:30:26,814
but Brad doesn't need to know that.

2028
01:30:28,290 --> 01:30:29,291
Daddy!

2029
01:30:31,650 --> 01:30:33,493
Sweetie, I've been waiting for you to...

2030
01:30:52,410 --> 01:30:54,731
- Did you just gulp?
- No.

2031
01:30:55,090 --> 01:30:56,091
I heard a gulp.

2032
01:30:56,250 --> 01:30:57,581
Well, a little bit, maybe.

2033
01:30:57,930 --> 01:30:59,091
- Sure.
- There you are.

2034
01:30:59,410 --> 01:31:00,775
He's a lot bigger than you.

2035
01:31:01,090 --> 01:31:03,411
He's got legs for arms.

2036
01:31:03,770 --> 01:31:05,260
Little star, guess what?

2037
01:31:05,490 --> 01:31:07,174
I like him. I like him a lot.

2038
01:31:07,410 --> 01:31:09,412
Yeah. I bet you he's
going to like us, too.

2039
01:31:09,690 --> 01:31:10,930
- Remember, Loving Fence.
- Yeah.

2040
01:31:11,010 --> 01:31:12,091
Just go say hi.

2041
01:31:12,450 --> 01:31:15,101
Yeah, look, I got this, buddy. Watch.

2042
01:31:15,570 --> 01:31:16,856
Hey. You must be Roger.

2043
01:31:17,010 --> 01:31:18,091
Nope.

2044
01:34:24,850 --> 01:34:27,456
One-oh-three-point-six

2045
01:34:27,530 --> 01:34:29,737
The Panda!

2046
01:34:29,850 --> 01:34:32,979
Caught Kenny G.
at the United Center this weekend.

2047
01:34:33,050 --> 01:34:34,461
Man, can that guy put on a show.

2048
01:34:34,530 --> 01:34:37,659
20, 000 people on their feet
for the entire four hours.

2049
01:34:37,730 --> 01:34:38,970
You're listening to Jason Sinclair.

2050
01:34:39,050 --> 01:34:40,336
This is The Panda.