1 00:01:32,718 --> 00:01:33,761 Brad! 2 00:01:34,553 --> 00:01:35,763 - Bye, Daddy. - Bye, sweetie. 3 00:01:35,971 --> 00:01:37,890 Bye-bye, guys. I'll pick you up on Monday. 4 00:01:38,223 --> 00:01:39,391 - Brad. - What's up? 5 00:01:39,475 --> 00:01:40,475 Hey, Brad. 6 00:01:40,809 --> 00:01:42,686 Hey, Brad. Looking good, buddy. 7 00:01:46,106 --> 00:01:48,108 - Dylan, where's your retainer? - I left it at Dad's. 8 00:01:48,651 --> 00:01:51,153 - Hey, where's your math workbook? - At Mom's house. 9 00:01:52,321 --> 00:01:54,365 - Where are all your undies? - I don't know. 10 00:01:54,531 --> 00:01:55,950 How do we get so many undies? 11 00:01:57,868 --> 00:01:59,078 Happy birthday, buddy! 12 00:02:00,788 --> 00:02:01,788 Brad already got me one. 13 00:02:02,581 --> 00:02:05,250 It was my idea! It was my idea! 14 00:02:06,543 --> 00:02:08,087 Hey, look at that. 15 00:02:08,170 --> 00:02:09,338 Guys. 16 00:02:09,546 --> 00:02:10,546 Daddy! 17 00:02:15,427 --> 00:02:16,512 All right! 18 00:02:17,262 --> 00:02:18,347 Megan, hold up! 19 00:02:20,182 --> 00:02:21,183 Whoa! 20 00:02:23,894 --> 00:02:25,062 - Are you all right? - I'm okay. 21 00:02:29,900 --> 00:02:30,943 Right here! 22 00:02:31,110 --> 00:02:32,152 Don't leave without it. 23 00:02:36,198 --> 00:02:38,826 Come on! Keep it moving! 24 00:02:39,493 --> 00:02:40,786 Inside the cones! 25 00:02:41,328 --> 00:02:42,746 Inside the cones like an ice cream. 26 00:02:42,871 --> 00:02:43,871 Let's go! 27 00:02:44,748 --> 00:02:45,874 Braddie! 28 00:02:46,041 --> 00:02:47,251 Here you go, buddy. 29 00:02:47,418 --> 00:02:48,836 Oh. Thanks, Braddie. 30 00:02:49,044 --> 00:02:50,462 - Hot cocoa? - Yeah. 31 00:02:50,546 --> 00:02:53,007 Nice. Little marshmallows floating around there all in formation. 32 00:02:53,090 --> 00:02:54,133 You are the greatest. 33 00:02:54,299 --> 00:02:55,884 I put a little licorice root in there too. 34 00:02:55,968 --> 00:02:57,052 - Oh! - Tell me what you think. 35 00:02:57,177 --> 00:02:58,554 - Hey, guys. - Daddy! 36 00:02:58,721 --> 00:02:59,721 Hey… 37 00:03:00,014 --> 00:03:02,099 - Hi, how was your day? - Good. 38 00:03:02,266 --> 00:03:03,517 All right, guys, hop in. 39 00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:05,561 I'll get them ready and meet you at Tae Kwon Do. 40 00:03:05,644 --> 00:03:07,479 See you in 30. Great. Looking forward to it. 41 00:03:07,563 --> 00:03:08,981 - Bye. - Bye, Dad. 42 00:03:10,983 --> 00:03:12,109 - Dusty. - Yeah? 43 00:03:12,317 --> 00:03:14,194 Sorry. You made treats for tonight, right? 44 00:03:14,278 --> 00:03:16,155 No, I got the gift card. I thought you were on treats tonight. 45 00:03:16,321 --> 00:03:19,575 No. I did gift card and the treats for the Halloween Spooktacular. 46 00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:21,910 Okay. Well, I guess I'll hit the bakery on the way to the pageant. 47 00:03:21,994 --> 00:03:23,037 - Bakery? - Unless you don't want me 48 00:03:23,120 --> 00:03:24,120 - to go to the bakery. - No, I… 49 00:03:24,163 --> 00:03:26,415 When you repeat what I said and shake your head up and down, 50 00:03:26,498 --> 00:03:27,541 it means you don't want me to do it. 51 00:03:27,666 --> 00:03:29,168 - I'm just thinking… - What? 52 00:03:29,251 --> 00:03:30,419 Maybe homemade? 53 00:03:30,502 --> 00:03:33,213 Yeah. Hey! Honk at him again, you better count your teeth! 54 00:03:33,297 --> 00:03:34,298 No problem, Braddie. 55 00:03:34,381 --> 00:03:36,508 Homemade snicker-doodles coming right up. One for you too. 56 00:03:36,633 --> 00:03:39,094 Should we fist bump again or would it be awkward? 57 00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:42,556 - I don't mind a second bump. All right. - Thanks, buddy. See you tonight. 58 00:03:42,639 --> 00:03:44,141 Bye, mate. Thanks so much for the cocoa. 59 00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:45,350 Bye, Daddy. 60 00:03:45,434 --> 00:03:47,811 Sorry. 61 00:03:50,230 --> 00:03:51,273 - Bye. - Bye. 62 00:03:51,690 --> 00:03:53,317 - These look great. - Thank you. 63 00:03:54,068 --> 00:03:55,110 - Look at that. - Oh… 64 00:03:55,319 --> 00:03:58,030 - Daddy! Karen! - Hey! Hey, guys. 65 00:03:58,280 --> 00:04:01,325 Wow, look how sexy Karen looks. 66 00:04:01,408 --> 00:04:02,910 Leather pants and side boob. 67 00:04:03,035 --> 00:04:04,578 That's perfect for a school function. 68 00:04:04,661 --> 00:04:07,206 - Honey, let's expect good things, okay? - I know, you're right. Right. 69 00:04:07,539 --> 00:04:10,042 - Hey. How's it going? - Hey. 70 00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:11,543 - Hi. - Hi. 71 00:04:12,044 --> 00:04:13,587 Wow, look at you guys. 72 00:04:13,712 --> 00:04:15,547 You and Mommy are so sassy all the time. 73 00:04:15,631 --> 00:04:16,673 - Hi. - Hi. 74 00:04:16,757 --> 00:04:18,383 Oh, hey. I got your novel. 75 00:04:19,009 --> 00:04:21,386 - It's amazing. - Oh, I'm glad you like it. 76 00:04:21,470 --> 00:04:23,889 I don't know how you write such powerful dialogue. 77 00:04:23,972 --> 00:04:25,891 - It must just come naturally, right? - Aw… 78 00:04:26,058 --> 00:04:27,518 - Like everything else. - You're so sweet. 79 00:04:27,643 --> 00:04:29,269 - Are you guys ready? - Let's go. 80 00:04:29,978 --> 00:04:31,522 I want my shirt like Adrianna's. 81 00:04:31,605 --> 00:04:34,108 Uh, no. No, no, no, honey. We're not doing that, okay? 82 00:04:34,233 --> 00:04:36,110 Put that back in. Look like a nice kid. 83 00:04:38,821 --> 00:04:41,281 Welcome to the One Horse Open Sing! 84 00:04:41,698 --> 00:04:43,826 Before we get started, notice we have 85 00:04:43,909 --> 00:04:47,329 several professional video and still photographers 86 00:04:47,454 --> 00:04:49,373 to cover all your kids for free. 87 00:04:49,790 --> 00:04:52,000 So you can all put your phones in your pockets, 88 00:04:52,084 --> 00:04:54,503 relax, and just be in the moment. 89 00:04:56,463 --> 00:04:57,463 You don't care. 90 00:05:13,981 --> 00:05:16,024 …and eat candy Santas and smashed potatoes 91 00:05:16,108 --> 00:05:18,152 and dressing up my dog like a reindeer. 92 00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:19,903 That's what Christmas means to me. 93 00:05:20,237 --> 00:05:22,406 Thank you. 94 00:05:22,489 --> 00:05:24,449 And now we have Megan Mayron. 95 00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:29,830 My name is Megan Mayron, and I like Christmas presents a lot. 96 00:05:32,166 --> 00:05:33,876 But I don't really like Christmas. 97 00:05:34,710 --> 00:05:36,503 My daddy was at my first Christmases, 98 00:05:36,962 --> 00:05:38,922 but I don't remember those ones. 99 00:05:39,506 --> 00:05:41,633 Then we had some with no daddy at all. 100 00:05:42,509 --> 00:05:43,594 Then Brad came, 101 00:05:43,719 --> 00:05:46,180 but he was always trying way too hard 102 00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:48,473 and making everyone feel uncomfortable. 103 00:05:49,016 --> 00:05:51,685 Then Daddy came back, and Brad did a pretend Christmas 104 00:05:51,768 --> 00:05:53,604 to show Daddy that Brad was better than him. 105 00:05:54,313 --> 00:05:57,816 So now we have to go to different houses to have different Christmases. 106 00:05:57,941 --> 00:05:59,818 Me and my brother wish we were like other families 107 00:05:59,902 --> 00:06:01,278 and we had normal Christmases. 108 00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:03,363 But we still like our Christmas presents. 109 00:06:03,447 --> 00:06:05,407 I want to be very clear about that. 110 00:06:05,574 --> 00:06:06,574 Thank you very much. 111 00:06:10,787 --> 00:06:12,748 Enjoy paying for therapy, boys! 112 00:06:12,956 --> 00:06:14,541 You better shut your mouth, Jerry! 113 00:06:14,625 --> 00:06:15,709 Absolutely, Dusty. 114 00:06:17,836 --> 00:06:19,796 We're messing up our kids, Brad, and it's on you. 115 00:06:20,505 --> 00:06:21,965 On me? Why is it on me? 116 00:06:22,049 --> 00:06:24,343 Because before you came around we only had one Christmas. 117 00:06:24,635 --> 00:06:25,969 So it's on you. 118 00:06:26,136 --> 00:06:28,222 Hold on, hold on. We don't have to circle the wagons 119 00:06:28,305 --> 00:06:30,557 every time one of the kids expresses a negative emotion. 120 00:06:30,641 --> 00:06:31,627 They're fine. 121 00:06:31,642 --> 00:06:33,101 Kids that get up in front of whole schools 122 00:06:33,227 --> 00:06:35,145 and say they don't like Christmas aren't fine, Sara. 123 00:06:35,229 --> 00:06:37,481 Well, she said she didn't like having two Christmases. 124 00:06:37,564 --> 00:06:38,732 Which is on you. 125 00:06:38,857 --> 00:06:41,693 So what if we all spend a Christmas together? 126 00:06:41,860 --> 00:06:43,737 A "Together Christmas." That's good. 127 00:06:43,862 --> 00:06:45,364 Now you fixed it. See, that… 128 00:06:45,447 --> 00:06:46,740 Now it's off of you. 129 00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:48,325 Let's invite Adrianna's dad, too. 130 00:06:48,450 --> 00:06:49,534 - What? - Yes. 131 00:06:49,618 --> 00:06:51,787 Are you being serious right now? Put that hand down. 132 00:06:51,870 --> 00:06:55,040 I've been nothing but nice to that guy, and he treats me like I abducted his kid. 133 00:06:55,123 --> 00:06:56,166 I'm not doing that. 134 00:06:56,250 --> 00:06:57,793 Why are you messing up the mood now? 135 00:06:57,876 --> 00:07:00,295 We wanna go tell the kids my great idea about the Together Christmas. 136 00:07:00,379 --> 00:07:01,797 Wait, how did it become your idea? 137 00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:04,466 It was your idea, but I named it "Together Christmas." 138 00:07:04,633 --> 00:07:06,760 People of Bikini Bottom… 139 00:07:07,344 --> 00:07:08,553 Hey, guys? 140 00:07:09,596 --> 00:07:11,890 Guys. Listen up, I got a surprise. 141 00:07:12,516 --> 00:07:13,684 Hello? 142 00:07:16,937 --> 00:07:19,189 - Guys. We got a big surprise! - A surprise? 143 00:07:19,356 --> 00:07:20,816 - Another pony? - A trampoline? 144 00:07:20,941 --> 00:07:21,941 You leaving? 145 00:07:21,984 --> 00:07:22,985 Not quite, okay? 146 00:07:23,068 --> 00:07:25,822 - But we got something better than that. - So much better. It's gonna be great. 147 00:07:25,923 --> 00:07:27,674 This year, no more back and forth at Christmas. 148 00:07:27,798 --> 00:07:29,658 - We're not doing the back and forth. - I just said that. 149 00:07:29,741 --> 00:07:31,326 No more back and forth at Christmas. 150 00:07:31,410 --> 00:07:34,162 This year, we're gonna spend one Christmas all together, all of us! 151 00:07:34,246 --> 00:07:35,706 - Yay! - A Together Christmas! 152 00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:37,708 - A Together Christmas! - Can you be quiet? 153 00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:39,334 A Together Christmas like a normal family! 154 00:07:39,418 --> 00:07:40,544 Yay! 155 00:07:40,627 --> 00:07:41,628 I'll get it. 156 00:07:42,421 --> 00:07:43,422 Hello? 157 00:07:44,047 --> 00:07:45,382 Grandpa Kurt? 158 00:07:47,676 --> 00:07:49,386 Daddy, Grandpa Kurt wants to talk to you. 159 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:51,179 No, no. Dusty, I'll just tell him… 160 00:07:51,263 --> 00:07:52,848 No. It's okay, Sara. 161 00:07:53,515 --> 00:07:54,641 Thank you. 162 00:07:55,934 --> 00:07:56,977 Thanks, buddy. 163 00:08:00,147 --> 00:08:01,273 What, Dad? 164 00:08:02,566 --> 00:08:03,650 Yeah, long time. 165 00:08:04,276 --> 00:08:06,069 No, I'm fine. Tomorrow? 166 00:08:06,194 --> 00:08:07,529 - Tomorrow. - No. 167 00:08:07,654 --> 00:08:09,823 I could probably pick you up, I guess, but… 168 00:08:09,990 --> 00:08:11,992 Hey! Psst! Guess what? My folks are coming tomorrow. 169 00:08:12,075 --> 00:08:13,493 - I don't care. - We can go together. 170 00:08:13,577 --> 00:08:14,828 Will you shut up? 171 00:08:15,245 --> 00:08:18,665 Dad, do you want to just text… Hello? 172 00:08:24,129 --> 00:08:25,547 Dusty, listen to me, 173 00:08:25,797 --> 00:08:28,508 I think you're approaching this with way too much negative energy. 174 00:08:28,633 --> 00:08:31,386 Brad, you don't know what you're talking about, so shut your fat hole! 175 00:08:31,678 --> 00:08:33,138 Dusty. 176 00:08:33,597 --> 00:08:35,807 I'm sorry, Braddie. I'm sorry… 177 00:08:36,058 --> 00:08:37,345 You see what he does to me? 178 00:08:37,470 --> 00:08:39,436 He's not even here yet and he's already ruining Christmas. 179 00:08:39,644 --> 00:08:42,022 - Okay, okay, relax. Relax. - I can't! 180 00:08:42,147 --> 00:08:45,317 Look, your father hasn't met the new evolved Dusty. 181 00:08:45,442 --> 00:08:48,195 You're a progressive, sensitive, child-first parent. 182 00:08:48,320 --> 00:08:50,906 That's exactly the stuff he's gonna make fun of us for. You'll see. 183 00:08:50,989 --> 00:08:53,241 He's gonna scoff at everything we do. He's a scoffer, Brad. 184 00:08:53,617 --> 00:08:55,118 Pepe, you have a grown son, right? 185 00:08:55,410 --> 00:08:56,410 Si. 186 00:08:56,495 --> 00:08:59,289 Why don't you tell Dusty here how much your son means to you 187 00:08:59,373 --> 00:09:00,582 in this season of good cheer? 188 00:09:00,665 --> 00:09:03,377 My son is an abysmal disappointment 189 00:09:03,502 --> 00:09:05,420 whose birth I regret more each day. 190 00:09:05,587 --> 00:09:07,047 - You see? - He didn't say nice things 191 00:09:07,130 --> 00:09:08,340 like you think he did, Brad. 192 00:09:08,465 --> 00:09:09,633 Dusty, you're being silly. 193 00:09:09,841 --> 00:09:11,635 I mean, who wouldn't be impressed with you? 194 00:09:11,802 --> 00:09:13,512 Come on. 195 00:09:13,678 --> 00:09:14,678 Dear God! 196 00:09:19,267 --> 00:09:21,978 He looks as if he's been chiseled from Gibraltar itself. 197 00:09:27,025 --> 00:09:29,778 This is gonna come off weird, Dusty, but he's beautiful. 198 00:09:33,490 --> 00:09:34,908 I wanna be his friend so bad. 199 00:09:43,500 --> 00:09:45,919 - Dusty. - Hey, Pop. 200 00:09:46,086 --> 00:09:47,796 - How was your flight? - Not bad. 201 00:09:47,921 --> 00:09:49,965 Took 20 minutes to get to the gate though. 202 00:09:50,048 --> 00:09:52,134 What's with that bottleneck you got out there? 203 00:09:52,259 --> 00:09:56,513 I'm sorry. Our local airport tarmac's not up to your standards, huh? 204 00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:59,349 I'm sorry. I didn't realize you designed this airport, 205 00:09:59,433 --> 00:10:00,767 or I'd have been more sensitive. 206 00:10:00,851 --> 00:10:03,019 I guess I'll move to a new town with a better airport. 207 00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:06,231 That way you won't be inconvenienced when you show up every five years or so. 208 00:10:06,356 --> 00:10:08,275 Same old Mr. Touchy. I love it. 209 00:10:08,483 --> 00:10:09,428 Here you go, Pancho. 210 00:10:09,443 --> 00:10:11,570 Why don't you bring the car around? We'll meet you at the curb. 211 00:10:11,695 --> 00:10:12,737 Right away, sir. 212 00:10:12,863 --> 00:10:15,824 I mean, no. I'm sorry, I'm not the driver. 213 00:10:15,991 --> 00:10:17,033 No, I'm Brad. 214 00:10:17,242 --> 00:10:18,243 The stepdad. 215 00:10:18,535 --> 00:10:20,287 - This is Sara's husband. - Why is he with you? 216 00:10:20,412 --> 00:10:22,706 Dad! 217 00:10:26,418 --> 00:10:29,129 That sweater. He wears a red sweater, so I can see him in a crowd. 218 00:10:32,507 --> 00:10:33,508 Dad! 219 00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:35,469 That's him, that's Dad. 220 00:10:40,515 --> 00:10:43,185 Dad! Dad! 221 00:10:52,569 --> 00:10:55,280 - I made a sign. - There's my big man! 222 00:10:59,367 --> 00:11:01,536 And this guy's raising your kids half the time? 223 00:11:01,703 --> 00:11:03,705 He hasn't seen his dad in a really long time. 224 00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:06,458 It's only been since Thanksgiving, but it feels like forever. 225 00:11:06,625 --> 00:11:08,877 - It does! - Oh! 226 00:11:09,419 --> 00:11:11,796 Four weeks? It's been a few years for us. 227 00:11:11,922 --> 00:11:14,466 What should we do? You want me to take my pants off? 228 00:11:14,591 --> 00:11:15,759 Hey, where's Mom? 229 00:11:15,842 --> 00:11:17,260 You didn't get her text? 230 00:11:17,511 --> 00:11:20,597 Uncle Arny came down with a bad case of the shingles. 231 00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:22,682 - No. - So Mom's staying back 232 00:11:22,766 --> 00:11:24,100 - to take care of him. - Okay. 233 00:11:24,184 --> 00:11:26,394 But, hey, you still got me. 234 00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:28,146 I sure do. I sure do! 235 00:11:30,398 --> 00:11:31,900 We're gonna have the best time. 236 00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:34,486 Oh! Dusty! 237 00:11:34,569 --> 00:11:36,655 - Hey, Don. - Hey, Muscles, come here. 238 00:11:36,738 --> 00:11:39,282 I've got a cold. Stay away. Don, Don! 239 00:11:40,408 --> 00:11:41,868 - Say, Dusty? - Yeah? 240 00:11:41,952 --> 00:11:44,579 Brad told me about this Together Christmas we're doing. 241 00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:48,416 You two are such wonderful, progressive co-dads. 242 00:11:48,708 --> 00:11:49,694 Co-dads? 243 00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:52,295 I'm so sorry. Mr. Mayron, this is my father, Don Whitaker. 244 00:11:52,754 --> 00:11:55,090 The pleasure is all mine, Captain! 245 00:11:55,590 --> 00:11:58,885 You piloted the Space Shuttle Atlantis in 1992 246 00:11:59,010 --> 00:12:02,055 and commanded the Endeavor on three missions in 1994! 247 00:12:02,180 --> 00:12:03,765 All right, come on, we're out this way. 248 00:12:04,599 --> 00:12:05,642 Thanks, Dusty. 249 00:12:05,809 --> 00:12:09,354 Say, Kurt, did you meet any interesting folks on your flight? 250 00:12:09,521 --> 00:12:12,232 I met a Scotch and a pillow. 251 00:12:12,315 --> 00:12:14,484 You know, actually, I always pick the flights 252 00:12:14,568 --> 00:12:16,528 that have the most connections 253 00:12:16,820 --> 00:12:20,574 so that I get to chat with as many new people as possible. 254 00:12:20,699 --> 00:12:23,451 - Oh, so you're a lunatic. Good to know. - That's me! 255 00:12:32,877 --> 00:12:36,214 Looks like one of your neighbors is getting an over-sized parcel. 256 00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:38,717 Hello! 257 00:12:38,842 --> 00:12:40,927 Don Whitaker, United States Postal Service! 258 00:12:41,011 --> 00:12:44,097 Retired, but never too old to lend a hand to a fellow carrier. 259 00:12:45,056 --> 00:12:47,934 Brad, I gotta tell you, this baby sure gives you a smooth ride. 260 00:12:48,101 --> 00:12:49,144 Oh, thank you, Kurt. 261 00:12:49,227 --> 00:12:52,265 - Yeah, it is surprisingly responsive. - Brad, he's not… 262 00:12:52,365 --> 00:12:54,268 So do they take your balls right there at the dealership, 263 00:12:54,357 --> 00:12:55,859 or do you send them in with the registration? 264 00:12:55,942 --> 00:12:56,942 How does it work exactly? 265 00:12:57,027 --> 00:12:59,487 No, no, they didn't take my balls. Just $2,000 down. 266 00:12:59,613 --> 00:13:00,905 This your place, Dusty? 267 00:13:01,072 --> 00:13:03,408 - I pictured it nicer. - Yeah, Dusty's house is nicer. 268 00:13:03,617 --> 00:13:04,701 This is my house. 269 00:13:04,868 --> 00:13:06,870 Just thought you'd like to step in and see the kids. 270 00:13:06,953 --> 00:13:09,331 Only if it's okay. Look, we don't want to infringe on your days. 271 00:13:09,456 --> 00:13:11,499 Of course, don't be silly. Come on, guys. 272 00:13:11,708 --> 00:13:14,669 You got to ask another man's permission to see your own kids? 273 00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:16,796 Unbelievable. 274 00:13:17,797 --> 00:13:20,467 We're back! With more daddies! 275 00:13:20,884 --> 00:13:23,845 Hey! Look how big you two got! 276 00:13:24,095 --> 00:13:26,139 Come on. Don't I get a hug? Come on! 277 00:13:27,682 --> 00:13:28,933 And who's this barroom brawler? 278 00:13:29,100 --> 00:13:30,685 He's our brother, Griffy, silly. 279 00:13:30,769 --> 00:13:33,605 Hey, come here, partner. Dusty, you never told me… 280 00:13:33,688 --> 00:13:36,274 - Why, he looks just like you. - Yeah, not my kid. 281 00:13:36,358 --> 00:13:37,859 Oh, no, no, no. I fathered that one. 282 00:13:37,984 --> 00:13:40,195 Oh. Ah, then how does he relate to me then? 283 00:13:40,278 --> 00:13:42,822 Well, he is the brother of your grand-kids, Kurt. 284 00:13:43,031 --> 00:13:44,908 - Oh. Here, here. - Oh. Okay. 285 00:13:45,033 --> 00:13:46,785 Hey, looking good, Buttercup. 286 00:13:46,951 --> 00:13:48,286 Good to see you. 287 00:13:49,371 --> 00:13:51,706 - Look who's here! - Pop-Pop! 288 00:13:52,874 --> 00:13:54,417 - Tell us a Pop-Pop joke! - Ooh, ooh. 289 00:13:54,501 --> 00:13:56,836 What's a good one? Why does a duck have feathers? 290 00:13:57,198 --> 00:13:59,266 - Why? - To cover up his butt quack. 291 00:14:01,966 --> 00:14:03,760 Hey, kids, I got a good one for you. 292 00:14:03,927 --> 00:14:06,137 - Two dead hookers wash up on the shore… - Hey, hey! 293 00:14:06,262 --> 00:14:08,098 - Whoa, whoa, shut up. - No way. No way. 294 00:14:08,181 --> 00:14:11,267 - Sara. How's my girl? - Hi! 295 00:14:12,227 --> 00:14:14,896 - What, Ginny couldn't make it? - Oh, she feels terrible. 296 00:14:15,021 --> 00:14:17,357 But she sent a batch of her special cookies! 297 00:14:17,691 --> 00:14:19,859 - Is there milk in that kitchen? - Yay! 298 00:14:19,943 --> 00:14:21,569 I want the first one. 299 00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:23,530 I get the first one! 300 00:14:24,114 --> 00:14:27,450 So he gets to be Pop-Pop and I'm just Grandpa Kurt? 301 00:14:27,575 --> 00:14:29,744 What? I'm in charge of the cutesy grandpa names now? 302 00:14:29,828 --> 00:14:32,080 If you want a better name, try showing up a little more often. 303 00:14:32,288 --> 00:14:35,208 Tell the kids, from now on, it's "El Padre." 304 00:14:37,335 --> 00:14:38,545 No more hooker jokes. 305 00:14:40,964 --> 00:14:43,883 These don't taste like La-La's cookies. They taste like Chips Ahoys. 306 00:14:44,050 --> 00:14:46,428 No, no. I sat right there in the kitchen 307 00:14:46,511 --> 00:14:48,722 and watched Grandma bake them just yesterday. 308 00:14:48,805 --> 00:14:50,014 I like them. 309 00:14:50,098 --> 00:14:52,642 So, this co-dads thing, is that what you call it? 310 00:14:53,351 --> 00:14:55,061 Yeah, that's what we call it. 311 00:14:55,311 --> 00:14:57,397 So, on his watch, he disciplines your kids, 312 00:14:57,480 --> 00:14:59,232 gives them advice, tucks them in, so forth. 313 00:14:59,357 --> 00:15:01,693 - And that bothers you not a bit? - Doesn't bother me at all. 314 00:15:01,943 --> 00:15:03,820 And his total lack of masculinity… 315 00:15:03,945 --> 00:15:07,699 I mean, his weak chin and soft underbelly influencing your son… 316 00:15:07,824 --> 00:15:09,075 You're good there, too? Yeah? 317 00:15:09,159 --> 00:15:12,328 You know what? I'm just feeling like maybe you guys want a little privacy. 318 00:15:12,412 --> 00:15:15,331 Stay right there, Brad, all right? He's just trying to stir the turd. 319 00:15:15,457 --> 00:15:17,375 You can scoff all you want. 320 00:15:17,500 --> 00:15:19,377 Everything is rock solid between me and Brad here. 321 00:15:19,461 --> 00:15:23,006 - In fact, best friends. - Really? 322 00:15:23,214 --> 00:15:25,633 - Thank you. - Brad. Stop it. Now. 323 00:15:25,759 --> 00:15:27,594 - I'm good. - He gets really emotional. 324 00:15:27,886 --> 00:15:30,638 - Brad. Hey, brother. - Did you call me "brother"? 325 00:15:30,805 --> 00:15:32,223 B-Dawg. Chill out, man. Relax. 326 00:15:32,724 --> 00:15:33,808 All right? Cut it out. 327 00:15:34,768 --> 00:15:36,060 - Brad, don't. - I know. 328 00:15:36,186 --> 00:15:38,521 Stop. All right, look. Hey. Brad, stop! 329 00:15:38,688 --> 00:15:41,608 Looks like you two guys have a real solid arrangement. 330 00:15:41,900 --> 00:15:43,943 You're spending Christmas together and everything. 331 00:15:44,068 --> 00:15:46,279 Speaking of which, whose place are we doing that at? 332 00:15:46,404 --> 00:15:48,406 We're totally happy to host if it makes it easier. 333 00:15:48,490 --> 00:15:50,158 We could do it at my place. I got more room. 334 00:15:50,241 --> 00:15:52,285 We can do presents at our place, dinner at yours. 335 00:15:52,368 --> 00:15:54,245 Nah, all that back and forth, who needs that? 336 00:15:54,329 --> 00:15:55,413 This place, that place. 337 00:15:55,705 --> 00:15:59,793 Why don't I book us a great vacation spot for all of us, 338 00:16:00,126 --> 00:16:02,086 and we can all spend the holiday week together? 339 00:16:02,212 --> 00:16:03,588 - Yay! Cool! - Thanks, El Padre. 340 00:16:03,713 --> 00:16:05,882 I love this idea! 341 00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:07,759 Something extra Christmasy, 342 00:16:07,842 --> 00:16:11,012 with lots of snow and family activities for all of us. 343 00:16:11,137 --> 00:16:13,973 Dad, I'm just worried about finding a place this close to the holiday. 344 00:16:14,098 --> 00:16:16,392 Booked it! Airbnb. All done. 345 00:16:16,518 --> 00:16:19,020 Yay, El Padre! 346 00:16:19,145 --> 00:16:20,980 It's gonna be so fun, 347 00:16:21,064 --> 00:16:23,191 since we're all such great friends, huh? 348 00:16:25,693 --> 00:16:27,737 Off to the mountains. Here we go, Griffy. 349 00:16:27,821 --> 00:16:30,198 - Here we go. - Big fun trip! 350 00:16:30,448 --> 00:16:31,950 Let me get that for you, Sara. 351 00:16:32,033 --> 00:16:33,409 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 352 00:16:33,535 --> 00:16:37,330 You know, Dusty, I think you and Kurt spending some time around me and my dad 353 00:16:37,539 --> 00:16:38,915 might do you both some good. 354 00:16:38,998 --> 00:16:40,458 Don't you see what he's up to here? 355 00:16:40,542 --> 00:16:42,919 He thinks you and me are harboring bad feelings for one another 356 00:16:43,002 --> 00:16:45,547 and sticking us together in some cabin is gonna bring that out. 357 00:16:45,755 --> 00:16:47,215 But you're not, are you, Brad? 358 00:16:47,298 --> 00:16:48,508 - I'm not what? - Harboring! 359 00:16:48,633 --> 00:16:50,718 - No, I'm not harboring anything. - Good, 'cause I'm not either. 360 00:16:50,844 --> 00:16:53,555 Let's use this as an opportunity to show him that we're not harboring. 361 00:16:53,721 --> 00:16:55,098 'Cause we're not harboring. 362 00:16:55,181 --> 00:16:56,850 You're looking at one safe harbor right here. 363 00:16:57,058 --> 00:16:59,477 You sure you want to pack it like that? That's how you gonna do it? 364 00:16:59,644 --> 00:17:01,729 Me and Brad got everything under control as a team, okay? 365 00:17:01,813 --> 00:17:03,106 - Right, Brad? - That's right. 366 00:17:03,231 --> 00:17:05,952 Yeah, what would I know about travel? I've only been to frickin' space. 367 00:17:06,052 --> 00:17:07,411 Did you pack the space shuttle yourself? 368 00:17:07,495 --> 00:17:09,863 You pop the trunk, arrange all the bags for you and your space friends? 369 00:17:09,946 --> 00:17:12,031 I did, as a matter of fact. Yes, I packed the shuttle. 370 00:17:13,992 --> 00:17:15,243 That's so cool! 371 00:17:15,618 --> 00:17:18,162 I love how you're always jotting down ideas for your book 372 00:17:18,288 --> 00:17:19,330 in your little notepad. 373 00:17:19,706 --> 00:17:21,082 People ever get crazy and think 374 00:17:21,165 --> 00:17:23,251 you might be writing something bad about them? 375 00:17:25,336 --> 00:17:30,091 Say, Brad, would you mind doing some "Yes, And" drills with me on the way? 376 00:17:30,258 --> 00:17:32,844 "Yes, and" thank you for asking me. 377 00:17:33,011 --> 00:17:35,722 I recently joined an improv comedy workshop. 378 00:17:35,805 --> 00:17:37,682 Brad's been pushing me to do it for years. 379 00:17:37,765 --> 00:17:40,602 - Because you're so funny. - Yeah, I really enjoy it. 380 00:17:40,685 --> 00:17:42,061 You should look into it, too, Kurt. 381 00:17:42,145 --> 00:17:43,563 I'd rather look into a loaded gun. 382 00:17:43,771 --> 00:17:45,732 - Did you hear that? - Did you just make that up? 383 00:17:45,857 --> 00:17:47,692 - Zinger! - That's provocative, too. 384 00:17:47,775 --> 00:17:49,402 You ready to let me do that, Mr. Stubborn? 385 00:17:49,527 --> 00:17:51,404 - I got it. - It's never gonna fit. 386 00:17:51,487 --> 00:17:53,072 Hey, kids, no, no, no, no. 387 00:17:53,156 --> 00:17:55,825 Why don't you jump into my car with Adrianna, all right? 388 00:17:55,909 --> 00:17:58,453 So Grandpa Kurt here can enjoy Pop-Pop's company 389 00:17:58,620 --> 00:18:00,163 on the way up. 390 00:18:00,371 --> 00:18:02,790 Already warmed up a spot in the capsule for you, Captain! 391 00:18:02,957 --> 00:18:04,834 Still never gonna fit. Ever. 392 00:18:08,338 --> 00:18:10,006 No, I got it. It's fitting fine. 393 00:18:10,340 --> 00:18:12,175 I just had to put it wheels-in. 394 00:18:16,804 --> 00:18:18,973 Perfect fit! All right, let's go. 395 00:18:19,140 --> 00:18:20,892 Hey, Adrianna, you know, when we're up there, 396 00:18:20,975 --> 00:18:22,393 I can teach you how to snowboard. 397 00:18:22,602 --> 00:18:23,895 You're not my dad. 398 00:18:23,978 --> 00:18:25,855 All right. It's gonna be a fun trip. 399 00:18:30,860 --> 00:18:33,154 It's time for One-Word Story. 400 00:18:33,279 --> 00:18:35,698 Anyone can join in. It doesn't have to be just Dad and I. 401 00:18:35,782 --> 00:18:38,117 You always give us the best start. 402 00:18:38,201 --> 00:18:40,244 - Uncle… - …Thomas… 403 00:18:40,370 --> 00:18:41,829 - …went… - …tiptoeing… 404 00:18:41,913 --> 00:18:44,207 - …into the… - …Empire State Building. 405 00:18:45,833 --> 00:18:47,669 Where were you going with that one? 406 00:18:47,919 --> 00:18:51,005 This all took place at the pancake breakfast! 407 00:18:54,801 --> 00:18:56,678 "G." Georgia, Georgia license plate! 408 00:18:56,844 --> 00:18:58,513 Ready, and… Quiet Game. 409 00:19:01,516 --> 00:19:03,101 - I'm terrible at this game! - I can't do it! 410 00:19:03,184 --> 00:19:05,019 - I just can't do it. - I hate the Quiet Game! 411 00:19:22,954 --> 00:19:25,081 We always liked the Shimpahs. 412 00:19:25,456 --> 00:19:27,875 The movers thought the Shimpahs' house was our house 413 00:19:27,959 --> 00:19:29,669 and almost moved us in there! 414 00:19:29,752 --> 00:19:32,463 The wrong family! We would've been living with the Shimpahs! 415 00:19:32,547 --> 00:19:34,215 Which I wouldn't have minded, 416 00:19:34,298 --> 00:19:36,843 'cause I had a huge crush on Vicky Shimpah. 417 00:19:36,926 --> 00:19:38,177 Wow. 418 00:19:38,302 --> 00:19:39,595 Dad, thank you. 419 00:19:39,721 --> 00:19:41,723 You make a five-hour trip go by like that! 420 00:19:41,806 --> 00:19:43,560 I just wanted everybody to have a good time. 421 00:19:43,667 --> 00:19:45,376 Nothing like a nice, relaxing road trip, huh, Dad? 422 00:19:45,518 --> 00:19:46,644 It was nothing. 423 00:19:46,728 --> 00:19:48,813 I've been in a confined space with a chimp. 424 00:20:06,414 --> 00:20:09,751 Dylan's got a girlfriend! 425 00:20:09,959 --> 00:20:11,169 No, I don't! Be quiet! 426 00:20:11,335 --> 00:20:12,462 Yeah, you love her. 427 00:20:12,587 --> 00:20:14,547 You want to buy her flowers and kiss her on the lips. 428 00:20:14,630 --> 00:20:16,382 Stop it! It's not funny! 429 00:20:16,466 --> 00:20:19,343 Megan! What did I say about teasing your brother about girls? 430 00:20:19,469 --> 00:20:20,470 She's still doing it. 431 00:20:20,553 --> 00:20:22,346 And she drilled him in the head with a snowball, too. 432 00:20:22,472 --> 00:20:24,265 Well, I'm not her mother. 433 00:20:24,515 --> 00:20:26,976 Now, go take your brother inside, please. Go on, sweetie. 434 00:20:27,143 --> 00:20:28,478 Come on, Griffy. 435 00:20:28,603 --> 00:20:30,938 So Dylan's started noticing the girls? 436 00:20:31,022 --> 00:20:33,524 You know, I think it's gonna be time to give him the talk. 437 00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:37,111 The talk? You mean the talk about the nitty-gritty? 438 00:20:37,195 --> 00:20:38,738 - The "nitty-gritty"? - I'm on it, Sar-Bear. 439 00:20:38,821 --> 00:20:40,531 I've been looking forward to this for a long time. 440 00:20:40,698 --> 00:20:43,367 I got a whole speech prepared. It's all heartwarming stuff. 441 00:20:43,493 --> 00:20:45,787 I'm sure you and Brad will do a bang-up job with that. 442 00:20:46,913 --> 00:20:49,123 Unless this isn't a co-daddying moment? 443 00:20:49,207 --> 00:20:50,291 - No. - No. 444 00:20:50,458 --> 00:20:53,002 - I mean, no, of course it is. - It is. 445 00:20:53,169 --> 00:20:54,796 - Yeah, it is. It's gonna be. - Okay, yeah. 446 00:20:54,879 --> 00:20:56,422 Yeah, we're gonna talk to him together. 447 00:20:56,506 --> 00:20:59,050 Oh, Dusty! I read about some gender-neutral flashcards. 448 00:20:59,759 --> 00:21:00,759 Flashcards. 449 00:21:00,968 --> 00:21:03,054 He's got flashcards to teach your son how to score. 450 00:21:03,179 --> 00:21:04,514 No, of course not. 451 00:21:04,597 --> 00:21:07,141 They cover human reproduction, puberty, and hygiene. 452 00:21:07,391 --> 00:21:09,310 Okay, great. You tee it up with the flashcards, 453 00:21:09,477 --> 00:21:11,437 and I'll knock it home with the heartwarming speech. 454 00:21:11,521 --> 00:21:13,648 - All right? We got this. - You're all set. 455 00:21:13,773 --> 00:21:18,069 I'll never forget when Brad first started asking questions about girls. 456 00:21:18,152 --> 00:21:20,530 I took him out for "the talk." 457 00:21:21,114 --> 00:21:23,741 He was so inquisitive and attentive. 458 00:21:24,367 --> 00:21:26,911 Then I dropped him back off at his dorm. 459 00:21:27,078 --> 00:21:28,078 Yeah… 460 00:21:28,996 --> 00:21:30,039 Well, come on in. 461 00:21:35,086 --> 00:21:36,254 Look, there's a game room! 462 00:21:36,337 --> 00:21:38,297 Wow. Adrianna, look. And a pool table! 463 00:21:38,381 --> 00:21:39,799 This is what I'm talking about. 464 00:21:39,882 --> 00:21:40,967 Look at that view! 465 00:21:41,843 --> 00:21:44,011 Look at all the mortise and tenon joinery! 466 00:21:44,137 --> 00:21:45,429 Sittin' fat. 467 00:21:45,596 --> 00:21:48,224 Your old man sure pulled the right rein getting this place. 468 00:21:48,307 --> 00:21:50,560 Oh, wow. I know. Better throw you a parade, huh? 469 00:21:50,643 --> 00:21:53,062 Oh, I am really looking forward to that. 470 00:21:53,146 --> 00:21:56,107 You want the "thank yous" printed on the bass drums or the sousaphone covers? 471 00:21:56,190 --> 00:21:58,192 Hey, did anyone bring my bag in? 472 00:22:01,988 --> 00:22:03,823 My supervisor Clyde Unix… 473 00:22:03,906 --> 00:22:06,826 He took over after Kirby Keller retired in '86. 474 00:22:07,118 --> 00:22:09,579 Horse farm, upper peninsula of Michigan. 475 00:22:09,912 --> 00:22:11,956 Gorgeous country, if you ever get the chance. 476 00:22:15,877 --> 00:22:16,878 Wow. 477 00:22:17,628 --> 00:22:19,046 Nice shower. 478 00:22:20,715 --> 00:22:21,841 That's weird. 479 00:22:23,009 --> 00:22:24,343 No controls. 480 00:22:25,761 --> 00:22:27,889 Hey, honey, how do you turn the shower on? 481 00:22:28,014 --> 00:22:29,390 Shower on. 482 00:22:29,724 --> 00:22:31,434 Off! Shower off! 483 00:22:31,517 --> 00:22:32,977 Shower off. 484 00:22:33,352 --> 00:22:35,021 Gosh! Ooh! 485 00:22:36,147 --> 00:22:38,482 Voice-activated water. Cool. 486 00:22:38,566 --> 00:22:40,484 Water, cool. 487 00:22:40,610 --> 00:22:42,987 - Off! Shower off! - Shower off. 488 00:22:43,112 --> 00:22:44,822 - Water… Cool… - Water. Shower cool. 489 00:22:44,906 --> 00:22:46,574 - Cool water. - Water cool. 490 00:22:46,699 --> 00:22:49,368 - Off! Water off! Turn off! - Shower off. 491 00:22:50,745 --> 00:22:51,745 Off. 492 00:22:52,246 --> 00:22:53,331 Oh, my God. 493 00:22:54,707 --> 00:22:55,958 Oh, my God! 494 00:22:56,042 --> 00:22:58,294 You scored on yourself. Friendly fire. 495 00:22:58,377 --> 00:22:59,879 Eight ball, corner pocket. 496 00:22:59,962 --> 00:23:01,422 - Ooh! No slashing. - Yeah. 497 00:23:01,505 --> 00:23:03,382 - Good job, babe. - Thank you, babe. 498 00:23:05,009 --> 00:23:06,761 Come on, Sara! 499 00:23:06,844 --> 00:23:08,346 No, that is holding. 500 00:23:12,183 --> 00:23:13,809 It's too loud, Dylan! Turn it down! 501 00:23:13,935 --> 00:23:14,977 I don't know how! 502 00:23:15,061 --> 00:23:16,938 Hey, hey, hey, turn that down! 503 00:23:17,021 --> 00:23:18,481 Griffy's asleep. 504 00:23:22,276 --> 00:23:25,154 - Why are you dressed like a woman, Brad? - I can't find my stuff. 505 00:23:25,238 --> 00:23:28,282 - Are you sure you put my bag in the car? - Yeah, of course. It fit perfect. 506 00:23:28,366 --> 00:23:30,493 Look, can we skip this one? I can't stand this song. 507 00:23:30,576 --> 00:23:33,663 - Skip it. Skip it, guys. - Oh, no, no, no! No, Sara. 508 00:23:33,871 --> 00:23:35,248 This is a great song. 509 00:23:35,623 --> 00:23:37,833 This is my real dad's favorite Christmas song. 510 00:23:37,917 --> 00:23:41,587 Yeah, well, I'm glad it makes him happy. You think I don't want to like this song? 511 00:23:41,671 --> 00:23:43,881 Of course I want to, it's a super uplifting song. 512 00:23:43,965 --> 00:23:45,633 - Yeah. - But he ruined it for me. 513 00:23:46,175 --> 00:23:47,635 What are you talking about? 514 00:23:47,718 --> 00:23:50,096 All right, so I'm 12 years old, and I join the Glee Club. 515 00:23:50,263 --> 00:23:51,347 Glee Club. 516 00:23:51,555 --> 00:23:54,350 All my buddies in the neighborhood gave me crap over it, but I don't care, 517 00:23:54,433 --> 00:23:57,144 because for the holiday pageant we're doing "Do They Know It's Christmas?" 518 00:23:57,228 --> 00:23:59,355 and I was determined to land that Bono part. 519 00:24:12,243 --> 00:24:15,788 So my buddy Derrick Lindmeyer is laying into the Sting part, 520 00:24:15,997 --> 00:24:17,915 when out in the audience, what do I see? 521 00:24:18,249 --> 00:24:21,002 My dad giving Scotty Kimball's mom a foot rub, 522 00:24:21,085 --> 00:24:22,128 not even paying attention! 523 00:24:27,008 --> 00:24:30,011 I totally missed the Bono part, and everybody made fun of me. 524 00:24:40,104 --> 00:24:42,690 - I got no recollection of that. - Yeah, well, I do, all right? 525 00:24:42,815 --> 00:24:44,567 And I got a lot of other stories just like it. 526 00:24:44,650 --> 00:24:46,569 Science Fair, you left with Brian Higby's mom. 527 00:24:46,986 --> 00:24:50,156 Little League regionals, you left with Mark Fitzgerald's mom and his aunt! 528 00:24:50,239 --> 00:24:51,741 Oh, yeah, now that I remember. 529 00:24:51,824 --> 00:24:54,535 Yeah. That went into extra innings. Know what I mean, kid? 530 00:24:54,618 --> 00:24:55,995 - No. - Ah. 531 00:24:56,370 --> 00:24:57,455 Nice. 532 00:25:01,667 --> 00:25:03,794 Dusty! Dusty! Come on. 533 00:25:04,003 --> 00:25:06,213 He's gonna ruin Christmas, Brad, I'm telling you. 534 00:25:06,297 --> 00:25:08,507 Look, I hate to hit you with the tough love, 535 00:25:08,591 --> 00:25:11,427 but the only person who can ruin your Christmas 536 00:25:11,761 --> 00:25:14,221 is looking back at you from that mirror. 537 00:25:16,057 --> 00:25:17,767 - All I see is you, Brad. - Oh. 538 00:25:17,975 --> 00:25:19,727 Okay. Well, sorry. Here. Here. 539 00:25:20,895 --> 00:25:22,313 There. There we go. 540 00:25:22,772 --> 00:25:24,148 - Still you, Brad. - Is it? 541 00:25:24,231 --> 00:25:25,358 Yeah, it's still you. 542 00:25:25,649 --> 00:25:28,611 Okay, well, look, I'm looking at you, so I meant you. 543 00:25:28,694 --> 00:25:30,988 - Well, I'm looking at you, so I see you. - Forget the mirror. 544 00:25:31,155 --> 00:25:32,990 You're the only one who can ruin your Christmas. 545 00:25:33,074 --> 00:25:34,074 Don't look at the mirror! 546 00:25:34,168 --> 00:25:35,785 I'm still looking at you if I look in the mirror. 547 00:25:35,868 --> 00:25:38,162 Don't worry about the mirror. That was bad. 548 00:25:38,245 --> 00:25:39,580 - Forget the mirror exists. - Okay. 549 00:25:39,789 --> 00:25:41,290 Let's just focus on those kids 550 00:25:41,374 --> 00:25:43,292 and giving them a better childhood than you had. 551 00:25:45,169 --> 00:25:46,169 You're right. 552 00:25:46,253 --> 00:25:47,505 - Yeah? - It's about them. 553 00:25:47,588 --> 00:25:48,881 It's about giving them a better Christmas. 554 00:25:49,006 --> 00:25:49,825 There you go. 555 00:25:49,840 --> 00:25:51,842 Then we jam that amazing Christmas right in his butt-hole! 556 00:25:51,926 --> 00:25:54,095 Yes, we do. Wait! Whoa, whoa! No. 557 00:25:54,220 --> 00:25:55,220 Yes! 558 00:25:55,763 --> 00:25:57,807 You know, Dusty, I'm just gonna take the mirror down. 559 00:25:57,890 --> 00:25:59,350 Then we don't have to worry about it. 560 00:26:02,144 --> 00:26:03,229 Yeah! 561 00:26:03,312 --> 00:26:05,272 - Here we go. - Here we go. 562 00:26:05,564 --> 00:26:07,274 Hey, where's your glove? 563 00:26:08,901 --> 00:26:10,861 No! Griffy! 564 00:26:12,446 --> 00:26:13,446 Excuse me. 565 00:26:16,033 --> 00:26:17,118 Griffy! 566 00:26:18,661 --> 00:26:20,079 Griffy! Hey! 567 00:26:20,913 --> 00:26:22,206 Griffy! 568 00:26:22,873 --> 00:26:24,250 Griffy! 569 00:26:24,834 --> 00:26:26,544 Watch out, honey! 570 00:26:32,758 --> 00:26:34,593 Is that Brad? 571 00:26:37,471 --> 00:26:39,223 - That's Brad! - That's Brad. 572 00:26:41,142 --> 00:26:43,477 That boy never… 573 00:26:43,602 --> 00:26:46,063 Hey, come here. Look at this. 574 00:26:51,402 --> 00:26:53,571 Mmm. Honey. 575 00:26:54,530 --> 00:26:56,073 - Oh. - Ow! 576 00:26:58,284 --> 00:26:59,535 Dusty, you like that? 577 00:27:02,663 --> 00:27:04,290 Let me capture this for posterity. 578 00:27:08,502 --> 00:27:11,172 The Nativity is a big deal in Terra Haute. 579 00:27:11,338 --> 00:27:14,049 This is the Redeemer, this is Abundant Life. 580 00:27:14,258 --> 00:27:15,258 Dad. 581 00:27:15,509 --> 00:27:17,970 Let's go, Pop-Pop. 582 00:27:22,892 --> 00:27:24,894 It's real pretty. We'll take the pretty gun. 583 00:27:25,102 --> 00:27:27,605 No. No, no, no, no. 584 00:27:27,730 --> 00:27:30,774 We're not gonna take that today 'cause we are a gun-free family. 585 00:27:30,858 --> 00:27:33,652 Good Lord. What has he turned you into? 586 00:27:41,160 --> 00:27:43,037 - Ah! - Ha-ha! 587 00:27:44,121 --> 00:27:45,706 All right, throw it down! 588 00:27:45,789 --> 00:27:47,458 All right, here it comes, Braddie! 589 00:27:54,548 --> 00:27:55,548 Brad! 590 00:28:01,889 --> 00:28:03,098 Hey, honey! 591 00:28:03,432 --> 00:28:05,059 Brad! Brad! 592 00:28:05,226 --> 00:28:07,645 You need a hat. You're gonna freeze, babe. 593 00:28:07,770 --> 00:28:08,979 Oh, thanks, sweetie. 594 00:28:09,063 --> 00:28:10,564 You look cute. 595 00:28:10,648 --> 00:28:13,776 Hey, I want to talk to you. I'm worried about your dad. 596 00:28:14,276 --> 00:28:16,987 Don't you think he seems slightly less chatty than normal? 597 00:28:17,112 --> 00:28:18,322 You got to be shitting me. 598 00:28:19,406 --> 00:28:21,408 I mean, he shows up here without your mom? 599 00:28:21,492 --> 00:28:23,953 Don't you think that's weird? There might be a problem? 600 00:28:24,036 --> 00:28:26,455 - With my mom and dad's relationship? - Yeah! 601 00:28:26,580 --> 00:28:28,958 What? They love each other more than we do! 602 00:28:29,458 --> 00:28:30,458 Yeah. 603 00:28:30,584 --> 00:28:31,961 I brought you your hat! 604 00:28:32,211 --> 00:28:34,255 No, honey, I didn't mean it that way. 605 00:28:34,338 --> 00:28:36,173 It's a huge compliment. Come on. 606 00:28:36,257 --> 00:28:37,466 You got to understand. 607 00:28:37,550 --> 00:28:39,051 Brad! The Christmas lights! 608 00:28:40,094 --> 00:28:42,471 No, no, no, no… 609 00:28:42,638 --> 00:28:44,515 All the light strands are connected. 610 00:28:44,598 --> 00:28:45,891 A terrible idea! 611 00:28:49,853 --> 00:28:51,230 None of these switches work! 612 00:28:53,524 --> 00:28:55,776 Heads up. 613 00:28:55,859 --> 00:28:57,987 Dad! What are these levers for? 614 00:28:58,070 --> 00:28:59,238 Ow! 615 00:28:59,405 --> 00:29:00,906 Sara! Stand clear! 616 00:29:00,990 --> 00:29:02,908 Brad! 617 00:29:07,746 --> 00:29:09,206 Brad, let it go! 618 00:29:09,290 --> 00:29:10,874 I don't want it to hit your car. 619 00:29:10,958 --> 00:29:12,960 Let it go! 620 00:29:14,837 --> 00:29:17,089 - Tell him to let it go. - Let it go! 621 00:29:26,890 --> 00:29:28,225 Are you all right? 622 00:29:29,852 --> 00:29:32,146 Look what you did to the side of my car, man. 623 00:29:36,942 --> 00:29:39,278 Dusty, I'm so sorry… 624 00:29:39,361 --> 00:29:41,780 Honey! 625 00:29:46,201 --> 00:29:48,245 I'm not putting that Santa Claus back up there. 626 00:29:48,329 --> 00:29:50,623 I don't want to put it back on the roof, either. 627 00:29:51,373 --> 00:29:53,417 Why didn't he let go? 628 00:29:53,584 --> 00:29:55,044 Because he's an idiot! 629 00:30:08,140 --> 00:30:09,391 Son of a… 630 00:30:17,107 --> 00:30:18,107 Don. 631 00:30:18,942 --> 00:30:19,985 Don. 632 00:30:20,069 --> 00:30:21,779 Don, wake up. Don! 633 00:30:22,863 --> 00:30:24,990 Don, wake up! Don! Don! 634 00:30:27,451 --> 00:30:31,080 Kurt, are you okay? Did you have a bad dream? 635 00:30:31,455 --> 00:30:32,623 Do you need to talk? 636 00:30:32,748 --> 00:30:35,167 Yeah, I need to be held. My heart hurts. No! 637 00:30:35,376 --> 00:30:37,711 Did you touch the thermostat? Did you turn it up? 638 00:30:37,795 --> 00:30:38,962 Well, of course not. 639 00:30:39,380 --> 00:30:41,048 Did somebody fiddle with the thermostat? 640 00:30:41,131 --> 00:30:42,299 Yes! It's 85 degrees. 641 00:30:42,383 --> 00:30:44,635 Eighty-five! Do you have any idea how much 642 00:30:44,718 --> 00:30:46,804 even a few degrees can impact the gas bill? 643 00:30:46,929 --> 00:30:48,639 Of course I do! It's unthinkable. 644 00:30:48,764 --> 00:30:51,433 Dad? Kurt? What's going on in here? 645 00:30:51,767 --> 00:30:52,810 Why is it so hot? 646 00:30:52,893 --> 00:30:54,728 Someone fiddled with the thermostat! 647 00:30:54,853 --> 00:30:56,814 What? Who would do that? 648 00:31:04,321 --> 00:31:05,948 What do you think you're doing? 649 00:31:06,156 --> 00:31:07,408 It's roasting in here! 650 00:31:07,700 --> 00:31:09,576 I like to sleep with my window open. 651 00:31:09,785 --> 00:31:10,786 Hey, kid. 652 00:31:11,245 --> 00:31:13,872 Are you allowed to touch the thermostat at your mom's house? 653 00:31:14,039 --> 00:31:15,040 Duh. 654 00:31:19,128 --> 00:31:20,129 What is going on? 655 00:31:20,629 --> 00:31:22,798 Adrianna! She turned up the thermostat! 656 00:31:22,881 --> 00:31:24,883 Said she fiddles with the thermostat at your place 657 00:31:24,967 --> 00:31:26,635 any time she damn well pleases. 658 00:31:26,760 --> 00:31:29,430 Dusty, is that true? Tell me that's not true. 659 00:31:30,639 --> 00:31:32,141 Oh, criminy, Dusty! 660 00:31:32,224 --> 00:31:34,893 You might as well give her your wallet and your 401[k] while you're at it! 661 00:31:34,977 --> 00:31:37,146 Brad, do you let the kids touch the thermostat at your house? 662 00:31:37,229 --> 00:31:40,607 What? No! The thermostat is a sacred covenant. 663 00:31:40,774 --> 00:31:42,985 I can't believe we're even talking about this! 664 00:31:43,235 --> 00:31:44,528 This is madness! 665 00:31:44,620 --> 00:31:46,580 Oh, God, even Brad's got his house in order. 666 00:31:46,664 --> 00:31:47,867 Hey, you got no right to talk, all right? 667 00:31:47,974 --> 00:31:50,118 It wasn't hard to keep me away from the thermostat once you shipped me off 668 00:31:50,194 --> 00:31:51,869 - to military school. - Kurt, you didn't. 669 00:31:51,994 --> 00:31:53,620 He was out of control. He was a bed-wetter. 670 00:31:53,704 --> 00:31:55,330 I was a bed-wetter. Were you a bed-wetter? 671 00:31:55,414 --> 00:31:56,749 I was four years old! 672 00:31:56,874 --> 00:31:58,459 Okay, everyone take it easy. 673 00:31:58,876 --> 00:32:01,962 It's not Dusty's fault that he lets Adrianna walk all over him. 674 00:32:02,045 --> 00:32:03,505 She does not walk all over me! 675 00:32:03,589 --> 00:32:05,382 I can see how being a stepdad, 676 00:32:05,591 --> 00:32:09,261 you might not feel empowered to discipline someone else's child. 677 00:32:09,344 --> 00:32:11,513 Hey, quit your scoffing, all right? 678 00:32:11,680 --> 00:32:12,848 And you two quit helping me. 679 00:32:12,931 --> 00:32:16,810 Look, Karen and Roger spoil her to no end. 680 00:32:17,144 --> 00:32:18,937 It's crazy! 681 00:32:19,229 --> 00:32:21,106 And there's nothing you can do. I get it! 682 00:32:21,190 --> 00:32:23,358 You're the stepdad. You're screwed. 683 00:32:23,484 --> 00:32:25,235 That kid's never gonna respect you 684 00:32:25,319 --> 00:32:26,779 unless you bring the hammer down. 685 00:32:36,038 --> 00:32:37,956 What the hell was that, Brad? 686 00:32:38,332 --> 00:32:40,292 I know. He's old school. 687 00:32:40,459 --> 00:32:42,377 I think you handled this really well, Brad. 688 00:32:42,503 --> 00:32:44,630 I'm so proud of the way you express yourself. 689 00:32:45,214 --> 00:32:46,298 Come here. 690 00:32:47,174 --> 00:32:48,592 Again? Really? 691 00:32:50,511 --> 00:32:51,678 Good night, Dusty! 692 00:32:52,012 --> 00:32:53,972 - Good night, Dad. - Good night, Brad. 693 00:33:13,659 --> 00:33:15,369 - Jump! Jump! - Come on, Griff. 694 00:33:15,536 --> 00:33:17,204 Jumpy, jumpy, jumpy! 695 00:33:17,871 --> 00:33:18,872 Casey's here! 696 00:33:19,581 --> 00:33:20,582 Hey, guys. 697 00:33:21,166 --> 00:33:22,166 Hey. 698 00:33:22,376 --> 00:33:24,127 Hey, Dylan, look. Casey's here. 699 00:33:24,253 --> 00:33:25,838 You want to come French her? 700 00:33:26,046 --> 00:33:28,507 Yeah, you want to go do French on your girlfriend, Dylan? 701 00:33:28,590 --> 00:33:30,133 Megan! Leave him alone. 702 00:33:30,884 --> 00:33:32,928 And where did you learn "do French"? 703 00:33:33,136 --> 00:33:34,221 I'll go talk to him. 704 00:33:37,391 --> 00:33:39,560 Dylan? You okay, buddy? 705 00:33:42,938 --> 00:33:45,399 I just… I don't get the whole girls thing. 706 00:33:45,607 --> 00:33:46,650 Oh. 707 00:33:47,067 --> 00:33:49,278 Girls, yeah. Yeah, that can be tricky. 708 00:33:49,862 --> 00:33:52,573 But you know who'd be really good in explaining that department? 709 00:33:52,739 --> 00:33:54,116 Your dad. Let me go grab him. 710 00:33:54,199 --> 00:33:56,368 No, Brad! I just want to talk to you about this. 711 00:33:56,493 --> 00:33:57,619 Just you, Brad, please? 712 00:33:57,703 --> 00:33:59,580 Me? You sure you don't want to talk to your dad? 713 00:34:00,789 --> 00:34:02,791 Oh, well, girls. Okay. 714 00:34:03,125 --> 00:34:05,210 Huh. Um… 715 00:34:05,419 --> 00:34:06,420 All right, the girl talk. 716 00:34:06,837 --> 00:34:07,837 Um… 717 00:34:07,963 --> 00:34:10,007 You know, boys have a… 718 00:34:10,632 --> 00:34:13,343 A dingle, right? And girls have a hoo-hoo or a whim-wham. 719 00:34:13,427 --> 00:34:15,762 - Brad, I already know about that stuff. - You do? 720 00:34:15,929 --> 00:34:18,098 - Yes. From school, and it's gross. - Perfect! 721 00:34:18,181 --> 00:34:20,267 I just want to know what to do if I, you know… 722 00:34:20,809 --> 00:34:22,936 - I like somebody. - Oh. Right, well… 723 00:34:24,229 --> 00:34:25,647 You want to become her friend first. 724 00:34:25,939 --> 00:34:28,108 You want to be that one that she confides in, 725 00:34:28,233 --> 00:34:30,027 that she tells you about all of her problems 726 00:34:30,110 --> 00:34:32,571 - with the guys she's actually dating. - Got it. 727 00:34:32,696 --> 00:34:33,989 It's called the "Friend Zone." 728 00:34:34,114 --> 00:34:36,909 And it's where we Whitaker men thrive. 729 00:34:37,826 --> 00:34:40,746 We're the best in the biz. Yeah. 730 00:34:40,913 --> 00:34:44,708 Here we are in a wild frontier, full of majestic pines, 731 00:34:44,917 --> 00:34:46,668 and you two numb nuts are sorting through 732 00:34:46,793 --> 00:34:49,254 a bunch of dried twigs on a Rite Aid parking lot. 733 00:34:49,338 --> 00:34:51,465 You just can't go out on public land and cut down a tree. 734 00:34:51,548 --> 00:34:54,217 Dusty, we are the public. We own those trees. 735 00:34:56,553 --> 00:34:59,097 Oh, I get it. You need to ask co-dad for permission. 736 00:34:59,264 --> 00:35:01,141 Oh, shut up. I know what you're trying to do. 737 00:35:01,266 --> 00:35:02,935 - What am I doing? - Making it look like 738 00:35:03,018 --> 00:35:04,895 I can't make a move without checking in with Brad first. 739 00:35:04,978 --> 00:35:07,439 Yeah, that's what I'm doing. Am I right about that? 740 00:35:07,522 --> 00:35:09,524 Oh, God. 741 00:35:13,195 --> 00:35:15,822 And we own the paint in the Friend Zone. 742 00:35:16,198 --> 00:35:18,450 And sure we're gonna lose some. Doesn't matter. 743 00:35:18,533 --> 00:35:20,285 We're gonna lose a lot, I'll be frank with you. 744 00:35:20,452 --> 00:35:21,787 Well, what do you know? 745 00:35:21,912 --> 00:35:24,706 Brad's having that nitty-gritty talk for you. 746 00:35:25,123 --> 00:35:28,001 Must be nice to have someone to handle the tough stuff, huh? 747 00:35:28,085 --> 00:35:30,212 And eventually you'll keep in touch. 748 00:35:30,295 --> 00:35:32,339 You might even be invited to their wedding! 749 00:35:32,798 --> 00:35:34,925 And their dad's, like, "Brad, what are you doing here? 750 00:35:35,092 --> 00:35:36,927 "Teresa never talks about you!" 751 00:35:37,469 --> 00:35:39,012 And you're like, "I'm invited." 752 00:35:39,179 --> 00:35:41,515 And he's, "I wonder about that." 753 00:35:41,598 --> 00:35:43,183 And you show them the proof! 754 00:35:43,308 --> 00:35:44,851 Always bring the wedding invite with you. 755 00:35:45,268 --> 00:35:47,312 - Then they can't kick you out. - Okay. 756 00:35:47,437 --> 00:35:50,440 But you'll be sad ultimately knowing that she's not with you, 757 00:35:51,024 --> 00:35:54,194 and you want to prepare yourself with, like, a mix-tape of sad songs. 758 00:35:54,486 --> 00:35:57,239 Anything from Chicago is usually pretty good. 759 00:36:04,788 --> 00:36:05,956 I don't really know that song. 760 00:36:11,253 --> 00:36:13,296 Wait! No, no, no! Dylan… 761 00:36:14,214 --> 00:36:16,091 That is the worst advice anyone could give you. 762 00:36:16,258 --> 00:36:17,676 Listen to your dad, please. 763 00:36:17,801 --> 00:36:19,845 It's okay, Dad. We don't have to talk about it. 764 00:36:19,928 --> 00:36:21,430 No, no, buddy, buddy, wait… look! 765 00:36:21,555 --> 00:36:23,473 Hey, this stuff is all about confidence. 766 00:36:23,640 --> 00:36:25,892 You just got to believe you're the best she's ever gonna find. 767 00:36:25,976 --> 00:36:28,645 You believe that to your core, and she will, too, I promise you. 768 00:36:28,895 --> 00:36:32,190 - But what if she doesn't? - Buddy, you can't be afraid of rejection. 769 00:36:32,441 --> 00:36:35,152 You'll never find love if you're too scared to put yourself out there. 770 00:36:35,610 --> 00:36:36,778 Hey, Goggles? 771 00:36:36,945 --> 00:36:38,030 Mistletoe is your ticket. 772 00:36:38,196 --> 00:36:40,657 You walk right up to her, you dangle this over her head, 773 00:36:40,741 --> 00:36:43,160 and then you slap your spaghetti suckers right on her. 774 00:36:43,243 --> 00:36:44,494 I don't know if that's appropriate. 775 00:36:44,661 --> 00:36:47,289 It's a time-honored holiday tradition, Mr. War-On-Christmas. 776 00:36:47,914 --> 00:36:49,916 Then you give her a nice smack on the caboose 777 00:36:50,042 --> 00:36:51,436 and tell her what a lucky girl she is. 778 00:36:51,501 --> 00:36:53,420 - Don't listen to that part. - Yeah, don't listen. 779 00:36:53,503 --> 00:36:55,433 Look at me. Look at me. You wanna be like Brad 780 00:36:55,548 --> 00:36:57,693 and be in the Friend Zone, or you wanna be Dad and get in the end zone? 781 00:36:57,966 --> 00:37:00,529 This worked for me when I was your age. You want to go for it, buddy? 782 00:37:02,429 --> 00:37:03,805 Come on, you can do this. 783 00:37:16,068 --> 00:37:18,070 No! I like Brad's way more. 784 00:37:18,236 --> 00:37:20,739 I just want to be her friend and listen to her problems! 785 00:37:28,747 --> 00:37:31,249 My tree, my tree, my tree, my tree. 786 00:37:31,458 --> 00:37:34,002 My tree, my tree. Can I yell "Timber"? 787 00:37:34,127 --> 00:37:36,004 - Sure can, sweetheart. - Yay! 788 00:37:36,129 --> 00:37:37,464 Is this okay? 789 00:37:37,547 --> 00:37:39,800 Are any of these trees even gonna fit in the cabin? 790 00:37:39,966 --> 00:37:41,635 We're gonna cut off the top 25 feet 791 00:37:41,718 --> 00:37:43,553 and chop the rest up for firewood, Don. 792 00:37:44,054 --> 00:37:44,998 Oh. 793 00:37:45,013 --> 00:37:47,015 Now, this is the Duster Buster I remember. 794 00:37:47,099 --> 00:37:49,559 A certified bad-ass that makes his own rules! 795 00:37:49,893 --> 00:37:50,977 Whoa! 796 00:37:51,061 --> 00:37:52,604 Go find a good tree, would you? 797 00:37:54,231 --> 00:37:56,274 Boy, I don't know about this, Kurt. 798 00:37:56,566 --> 00:37:59,194 Isn't it illegal to harvest a tree from public lands? 799 00:37:59,277 --> 00:38:01,196 Oh, hell, yeah. It's a federal crime. 800 00:38:01,363 --> 00:38:04,324 Tried to talk him out of it, but you know how stubborn that kid can be. 801 00:38:04,407 --> 00:38:05,450 Okay. 802 00:38:06,076 --> 00:38:09,496 Dusty, look, I know you're upset about Dylan, but I just… 803 00:38:09,621 --> 00:38:12,666 I told you, Brad, I'm not upset, all right? We're co-dads! 804 00:38:12,791 --> 00:38:15,418 If he prefers your terrible advice, fine. I'm cool with that. 805 00:38:15,544 --> 00:38:17,712 I just want to find the perfect Together Christmas tree. 806 00:38:17,796 --> 00:38:19,923 Well, I just don't know if it's the best choice, y'know? 807 00:38:20,048 --> 00:38:23,051 Well, maybe we're not always gonna do everything your way every time. 808 00:38:23,468 --> 00:38:24,678 Trouble in paradise, fellas? 809 00:38:24,845 --> 00:38:26,847 - No, we're picking a tree. - Just having a conversation. 810 00:38:28,181 --> 00:38:29,933 El Padre! 811 00:38:30,475 --> 00:38:31,419 Lookit! 812 00:38:31,434 --> 00:38:33,937 Hey, what, kids? What, you find a dead squirrel? 813 00:38:34,104 --> 00:38:35,647 We don't have to do things my way. 814 00:38:35,730 --> 00:38:36,675 - Really? - Yeah. 815 00:38:36,690 --> 00:38:37,732 What about baseball snack? 816 00:38:37,816 --> 00:38:40,152 I just wanted to give out Fruit Roll-Ups. What's the big deal? 817 00:38:40,235 --> 00:38:42,696 No, I just feel like organic fruit is much more nutritious 818 00:38:42,779 --> 00:38:43,989 than its rolled-up counterpart. 819 00:38:44,156 --> 00:38:45,100 - Yeah? - Yeah. 820 00:38:45,115 --> 00:38:47,701 What about Megan's diorama? You didn't want to use any of my ideas. 821 00:38:47,784 --> 00:38:49,202 Your only idea was the Bay of Pigs! 822 00:38:49,286 --> 00:38:50,829 It's an important event in our nation's history! 823 00:38:50,954 --> 00:38:51,954 It was bloody. 824 00:38:51,997 --> 00:38:54,708 You wanted her to do green energy so you could look like Mr. Perfect Dad. 825 00:38:54,916 --> 00:38:57,085 - I'm not Mr. Perfect Dad. - You act like Mr. Perfect Dad. 826 00:38:57,252 --> 00:38:58,295 I'm not Mr. Perfect Dad. 827 00:38:58,378 --> 00:38:59,880 And we don't have to do things my way. 828 00:39:00,005 --> 00:39:01,089 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah. 829 00:39:03,175 --> 00:39:05,802 Okay. You don't think I can operate a chainsaw, do you? 830 00:39:05,886 --> 00:39:09,014 Guess who got his woodlands management badge in Webelos. 831 00:39:09,347 --> 00:39:11,391 I did! Brad Whitaker. 832 00:39:14,769 --> 00:39:17,856 Dusty, look at this one. Perfectly symmetrical. 833 00:39:18,732 --> 00:39:19,732 Okay. 834 00:39:23,195 --> 00:39:24,279 Oh, yeah. 835 00:39:24,738 --> 00:39:26,448 Keep an eye out for rangers! 836 00:39:26,823 --> 00:39:29,993 I've got to pinpoint a 60-degree angle top cut. 837 00:39:30,911 --> 00:39:32,662 That's what I'm gonna do first. 838 00:39:34,497 --> 00:39:36,583 Oh, yeah! She's cutting like butter! 839 00:39:38,001 --> 00:39:40,086 Hey, Brad, isn't that a… 840 00:39:49,763 --> 00:39:50,931 Hold it, hold it! 841 00:39:52,057 --> 00:39:53,600 Timber! 842 00:39:55,435 --> 00:39:57,479 Wow! 843 00:39:58,063 --> 00:40:00,398 Brad, you cut down a cell phone tower. 844 00:40:00,565 --> 00:40:02,150 Why'd you cut down a cell phone tower? 845 00:40:02,359 --> 00:40:03,944 No bars? No bars? 846 00:40:07,322 --> 00:40:08,865 - That was excellent! - Get up. 847 00:40:08,949 --> 00:40:10,867 - You really stuck that landing, man. - Would you get up? 848 00:40:10,951 --> 00:40:12,619 I'd give you a 9.2 on my card. 849 00:40:12,827 --> 00:40:15,372 - Brad, get up. - I think Brad's dead again. 850 00:40:15,455 --> 00:40:17,123 Man, you killed the poor bastard! 851 00:40:17,207 --> 00:40:18,625 Brad, don't go into the light! 852 00:40:18,833 --> 00:40:21,086 It's okay, sweetheart. El Padre will bring him back. 853 00:40:21,211 --> 00:40:22,754 - Stand clear. - I got it, all right? 854 00:40:22,837 --> 00:40:24,214 It's your fault we're even out here. 855 00:40:24,339 --> 00:40:26,675 You're getting in our heads and starting static between me and Brad. 856 00:40:26,758 --> 00:40:29,094 There's plenty of static between you and Brad already. 857 00:40:29,261 --> 00:40:31,972 And you know what? Deep down, you want him dead, don't you? 858 00:40:32,055 --> 00:40:33,098 You can say it. 859 00:40:33,181 --> 00:40:35,225 We all want him dead. I want him dead. Everybody does. 860 00:40:35,517 --> 00:40:36,851 - What? - Come on, admit it. 861 00:40:36,935 --> 00:40:39,271 Why don't you admit why you invited yourself to Christmas? 862 00:40:39,396 --> 00:40:40,814 Well, why don't you tell me, smart guy? 863 00:40:40,897 --> 00:40:42,399 'Cause you knew I was trying to be a good dad, 864 00:40:42,524 --> 00:40:44,651 be around for my kids the way you never were for me. 865 00:40:44,776 --> 00:40:46,403 That's why you want to crap all over it. 866 00:40:46,486 --> 00:40:47,988 Get up, Brad! 867 00:40:49,364 --> 00:40:50,699 Oh, my God, what happened? 868 00:40:50,865 --> 00:40:52,575 You cut down a cell phone tower, Brad. 869 00:40:52,659 --> 00:40:53,910 You know, you're right. 870 00:40:54,327 --> 00:40:56,121 I did invite myself to Christmas. 871 00:40:56,329 --> 00:40:57,998 But that's because you never do. 872 00:41:00,875 --> 00:41:03,044 I feel like I died again. Did I die again? 873 00:41:03,211 --> 00:41:04,462 A little bit. Come on. 874 00:41:08,341 --> 00:41:10,176 Okay. Our report's all squared away. 875 00:41:10,260 --> 00:41:11,803 Yimmy, Bill, thank you guys so much 876 00:41:11,886 --> 00:41:13,638 for the understanding. We really appreciate it. 877 00:41:13,722 --> 00:41:15,807 I'm so sorry. I'm truly embarrassed. 878 00:41:15,890 --> 00:41:17,934 No, hey. It was an honest mistake. 879 00:41:18,059 --> 00:41:19,477 Okay, you're all set. 880 00:41:19,561 --> 00:41:22,230 Okay, We'd better get back to the site and lock it down. 881 00:41:22,314 --> 00:41:24,941 Hold on one second. 882 00:41:25,066 --> 00:41:28,028 Is there any way we could do better than $20,000? 883 00:41:28,111 --> 00:41:30,405 Can't you reuse some of the antenna equipment? 884 00:41:30,822 --> 00:41:34,242 Sorry, no. These old 4G units are obsolete already. 885 00:41:34,326 --> 00:41:36,202 That's why you're getting this one so cheap! 886 00:41:36,286 --> 00:41:38,121 - It looks really nice, though. - It sure does. 887 00:41:38,204 --> 00:41:40,707 Hey, guys, keep it up, it looks great. Happy Holidays. 888 00:41:40,790 --> 00:41:42,417 Happy Christmas, guys. Thanks. 889 00:41:42,500 --> 00:41:45,879 Please tell me you did not just spend $20,000 on a Christmas tree? 890 00:41:45,962 --> 00:41:48,256 Twenty thousand dollars. "Can you hear me now?" 891 00:41:49,507 --> 00:41:50,717 You want some eggnog? 892 00:41:53,803 --> 00:41:55,680 - Mmm. Yummy. - Hey! 893 00:41:55,764 --> 00:41:57,349 - I want some! - Me, too! 894 00:41:57,432 --> 00:41:59,142 Now, girls, that's a grown-up drink. 895 00:41:59,309 --> 00:42:01,019 Yes. Thank you, Karen. 896 00:42:01,144 --> 00:42:02,812 So we're only gonna have one. 897 00:42:02,896 --> 00:42:04,147 What? No, no, no! 898 00:42:04,272 --> 00:42:05,940 There's rum in there, so not any. 899 00:42:06,399 --> 00:42:07,400 Aw! 900 00:42:09,194 --> 00:42:10,695 Are you writing about me? 901 00:42:10,945 --> 00:42:12,405 All right. Somebody want to plug her in? 902 00:42:12,530 --> 00:42:13,782 Yeah, I got it. 903 00:42:15,492 --> 00:42:16,659 Cool! 904 00:42:17,786 --> 00:42:18,786 That's weird. 905 00:42:22,123 --> 00:42:23,625 Wow! 906 00:42:39,015 --> 00:42:40,141 What do you think? 907 00:42:41,559 --> 00:42:42,560 It's so pretty. 908 00:42:42,644 --> 00:42:45,230 Well, it ought to be at 1,200 bucks a foot. 909 00:42:45,647 --> 00:42:47,273 Dad, we're lighting the tree! 910 00:42:47,690 --> 00:42:48,733 Where's my dad? 911 00:42:48,817 --> 00:42:50,860 Yeah, I thought it was a little quiet around here. 912 00:42:50,944 --> 00:42:52,362 - Pop-Pop? - Don? 913 00:42:52,487 --> 00:42:53,487 Pop-Pop? 914 00:42:54,614 --> 00:42:55,949 Is he still outside? 915 00:42:59,202 --> 00:43:00,578 Dad! 916 00:43:01,955 --> 00:43:03,123 Dad? 917 00:43:04,332 --> 00:43:05,417 Dad? 918 00:43:06,126 --> 00:43:07,627 Brad! 919 00:43:07,794 --> 00:43:09,587 Dad! Where are you? 920 00:43:09,671 --> 00:43:11,840 - I found him! Where are you? - I don't know. 921 00:43:11,965 --> 00:43:13,800 - Are you hurt? - Oh, no, no! 922 00:43:13,883 --> 00:43:16,428 No, I just can't quite get up. 923 00:43:18,346 --> 00:43:19,514 Dad, don't move. 924 00:43:19,806 --> 00:43:21,683 There's a pack of wolves on you. 925 00:43:21,808 --> 00:43:23,518 - Is that what it is? - Yeah. 926 00:43:23,726 --> 00:43:26,020 I can feel something tugging at my trousers. 927 00:43:26,104 --> 00:43:28,606 - What color are they, Brad? - They're gray wolves. 928 00:43:28,690 --> 00:43:30,942 That'll be Canis lupus. They're dangerous. 929 00:43:31,025 --> 00:43:33,445 Really? They look like you could just reach out and pet them. 930 00:43:33,528 --> 00:43:34,904 I kinda want to pet them, Dad. 931 00:43:34,988 --> 00:43:37,657 Now, Brad. Don't make eye contact with the alpha wolf. 932 00:43:37,740 --> 00:43:39,993 I already did! Right in the eyes. 933 00:43:40,076 --> 00:43:41,619 Don't show any fear. 934 00:43:41,744 --> 00:43:43,746 I don't want to watch the wolves eat you! 935 00:43:43,830 --> 00:43:45,748 Breathe deep and pull yourself together. 936 00:43:45,874 --> 00:43:47,041 I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 937 00:43:47,208 --> 00:43:48,209 Hut! 938 00:43:50,462 --> 00:43:52,255 Hut! Hurt! 939 00:43:52,464 --> 00:43:54,007 Are you saying "hut" or "hurt"? 940 00:43:54,174 --> 00:43:55,633 Dad, what happened? 941 00:43:55,717 --> 00:43:58,803 You know, I saw the nicest tree a ways off, 942 00:43:58,928 --> 00:44:01,097 and I got a little off course. 943 00:44:01,222 --> 00:44:04,184 I tried to call you, but all of a sudden my signal dropped! 944 00:44:04,350 --> 00:44:05,295 Really? 945 00:44:05,310 --> 00:44:09,481 I tried to find my way back, but at some point, I lost consciousness. 946 00:44:09,606 --> 00:44:12,734 That's about when the wolves must have come across me. 947 00:44:12,859 --> 00:44:13,902 It's all right, fellas. 948 00:44:14,027 --> 00:44:16,196 You didn't have to go to any trouble. It's all good. 949 00:44:22,160 --> 00:44:24,204 I'm sorry for all the hugs. 950 00:44:24,454 --> 00:44:26,748 I kind of don't want to let go. 951 00:44:26,831 --> 00:44:29,876 I almost thought I'd lost you out there to those nasty wolves. 952 00:44:30,043 --> 00:44:32,045 Do you have any idea how much I love you? 953 00:44:32,128 --> 00:44:35,381 Well, of course I do. You tweet about it every day. 954 00:44:35,465 --> 00:44:38,009 You know how much I love you, too, don't you? 955 00:44:38,134 --> 00:44:40,637 Your answer is right in here. 956 00:44:41,387 --> 00:44:42,680 I can see it! 957 00:44:44,098 --> 00:44:46,476 Okay, now that everyone is accounted for, 958 00:44:46,559 --> 00:44:50,396 can we please talk about who is paying for that monstrosity? 959 00:44:50,480 --> 00:44:53,233 Well, you know, it was Dusty's idea to cut down the tree. 960 00:44:53,316 --> 00:44:55,944 Yeah, and it was your idea to cut down the cell phone tower, Brad. 961 00:44:56,027 --> 00:44:58,238 Great, so as per usual, we get stuck paying. 962 00:44:58,363 --> 00:45:00,448 - Wait, what does that mean? - I think it's a nice tree. 963 00:45:00,532 --> 00:45:02,408 I don't know. Dylan's retainer? Megan's flute? 964 00:45:02,492 --> 00:45:04,452 What about Tae Kwon Do that you signed them up for 965 00:45:04,536 --> 00:45:05,912 and didn't even ask us about? 966 00:45:05,995 --> 00:45:08,331 Yes, and who paid for the trip to the aquarium last week? 967 00:45:08,414 --> 00:45:09,624 It's a really nice tree. 968 00:45:09,707 --> 00:45:10,959 So now we're keeping score, huh? 969 00:45:11,042 --> 00:45:13,419 Well, who paid for the parking and bought them blowup orcas? 970 00:45:13,503 --> 00:45:15,547 After we told them they couldn't have a blowup orca! 971 00:45:15,630 --> 00:45:17,799 Yeah, because you were too cheap to buy them! 972 00:45:17,882 --> 00:45:20,051 Who crushed my car with a snow blower? You did, Brad. 973 00:45:20,134 --> 00:45:22,595 - Who crushed my car with a motorcycle? - Hello! You again! 974 00:45:22,720 --> 00:45:23,706 Hey! 975 00:45:23,721 --> 00:45:25,014 It's a beautiful tree! 976 00:45:25,098 --> 00:45:26,683 It's beautiful, all right? 977 00:45:27,684 --> 00:45:29,519 Okay, yeah. Dad's right. 978 00:45:30,770 --> 00:45:32,105 It's a beautiful tree. 979 00:45:34,232 --> 00:45:35,942 Whoa! 980 00:45:36,317 --> 00:45:38,987 Don, I'm sorry, I don't think I'm gonna be able to save the foot. 981 00:45:39,070 --> 00:45:40,238 Yeah, that baby's coming off. 982 00:45:40,321 --> 00:45:42,073 I'll need some morphine and a bread knife. 983 00:45:42,156 --> 00:45:43,408 Brad, hold him down. 984 00:45:43,533 --> 00:45:45,702 Oh, no. That's just my feet. 985 00:45:45,785 --> 00:45:47,745 It's the mail carrier's curse. 986 00:45:47,870 --> 00:45:50,206 Back when I used to sleep with your mom, 987 00:45:50,290 --> 00:45:54,544 I once scratched her leg so bad with a piece of rogue heel skin, 988 00:45:54,669 --> 00:45:56,212 it actually drew blood. 989 00:45:56,296 --> 00:45:58,548 What do you mean, used to sleep with Ginny? 990 00:45:58,881 --> 00:45:59,924 What? 991 00:46:01,009 --> 00:46:03,803 Oh. We sleep in separate bedrooms. 992 00:46:03,886 --> 00:46:06,097 You know how badly I snore, Brad. 993 00:46:06,764 --> 00:46:08,558 Boy, that is inspiring! 994 00:46:08,975 --> 00:46:12,979 You know? The way you're always so considerate to the other person. 995 00:46:13,479 --> 00:46:14,814 Ugh. 996 00:46:15,356 --> 00:46:17,191 I really want to take this foot off. 997 00:46:26,701 --> 00:46:27,910 Hey, sweetie. 998 00:46:28,202 --> 00:46:29,787 You know, you might wanna close your window. 999 00:46:29,871 --> 00:46:30,997 You know, since it's winter? 1000 00:46:31,080 --> 00:46:32,081 You're not my dad. 1001 00:46:32,165 --> 00:46:34,667 You know, I appreciate you reminding me of that every few hours. 1002 00:46:34,751 --> 00:46:36,461 But, you know, we're not the only people here, 1003 00:46:36,544 --> 00:46:38,963 so maybe we set the thermostat to like 75? 1004 00:46:39,047 --> 00:46:40,882 I mean, that's still really toasty, right? 1005 00:46:41,007 --> 00:46:42,007 Eighty-five. 1006 00:46:42,216 --> 00:46:45,470 Okay, well, what if I counter you at, like, 78? 1007 00:46:45,553 --> 00:46:47,930 And then you negotiate with me, you come back at, like, 83, 1008 00:46:48,014 --> 00:46:49,599 and then maybe we settle at, like, 80. 1009 00:46:49,682 --> 00:46:51,184 - What do you say to that? - Eighty-one. 1010 00:46:51,267 --> 00:46:52,267 Deal! 1011 00:46:52,310 --> 00:46:54,896 Look at that. The two of us are starting to see eye to eye. 1012 00:46:55,021 --> 00:46:56,230 Thank you, sweetie. 1013 00:46:56,564 --> 00:46:57,649 Thank God. 1014 00:46:58,149 --> 00:47:00,818 There's Brad with some makeup cocoa for being such a jerk. 1015 00:47:00,943 --> 00:47:02,487 Thank you. 1016 00:47:02,570 --> 00:47:05,073 - Brad! What are you doing? - Oh, God. 1017 00:47:06,449 --> 00:47:08,493 - Why would you do that? - Look what you made me do! 1018 00:47:08,576 --> 00:47:09,744 I didn't make you do it! 1019 00:47:09,827 --> 00:47:12,580 I thought you were bringing me cocoa and you just threw it all over yourself. 1020 00:47:12,664 --> 00:47:13,873 You almost burned me, Brad! 1021 00:47:13,956 --> 00:47:16,167 - I wasn't bringing you makeup cocoa. - Why not? 1022 00:47:16,250 --> 00:47:17,919 I would've said, "Here's some makeup cocoa." 1023 00:47:18,002 --> 00:47:20,254 - I've been waiting for my makeup cocoa. - I didn't know that! 1024 00:47:20,338 --> 00:47:22,548 If I knew you wanted makeup cocoa, I would've… 1025 00:47:22,715 --> 00:47:23,758 Eighty-one! 1026 00:47:23,883 --> 00:47:26,219 No, no, don't touch that! I talked her down from the high 80s. 1027 00:47:26,302 --> 00:47:27,929 I'm making progress with her. This is good. 1028 00:47:28,012 --> 00:47:30,473 - I thought you had your house in order. - Look, don't you see? 1029 00:47:30,556 --> 00:47:33,351 We're doing exactly what he wants. We're letting things out of the harbor! 1030 00:47:33,434 --> 00:47:35,895 - So you are harboring. - Of course I'm harboring! And so are you. 1031 00:47:35,978 --> 00:47:37,980 Harboring was working just fine before he showed up. 1032 00:47:38,064 --> 00:47:39,565 Let's get everything back in the harbor 1033 00:47:39,649 --> 00:47:42,026 and let's harbor it all back in and close up the harbor. 1034 00:47:42,110 --> 00:47:43,277 I don't know if I can! 1035 00:47:43,361 --> 00:47:45,196 You said, let's put the focus back on the kids. 1036 00:47:45,279 --> 00:47:46,948 That was a great idea! 1037 00:47:47,865 --> 00:47:51,035 - Fine. Harbor's closed. - Good. 1038 00:47:51,202 --> 00:47:52,995 But we're going halfsies on the cell tower. 1039 00:47:53,079 --> 00:47:54,622 Fine, halfsies on the cell tower. 1040 00:47:54,789 --> 00:47:56,374 Brad, are you okay? 1041 00:47:56,791 --> 00:47:58,710 Huh? Yeah. 1042 00:47:59,043 --> 00:48:01,462 - Did you make tee-tee in bed? - No, it's cocoa. 1043 00:48:01,629 --> 00:48:03,548 Did your cocoa make you tee-tee in bed? 1044 00:48:03,631 --> 00:48:05,299 You're sleepwalking. Go back to sleep. 1045 00:48:05,383 --> 00:48:07,343 The big boy doesn't have to be embarrassed. 1046 00:48:10,430 --> 00:48:11,889 How would I pee upwards? 1047 00:48:16,853 --> 00:48:18,146 Seven and a half. Thirteen. 1048 00:48:26,571 --> 00:48:27,697 - Pretty good. - Yeah. 1049 00:48:27,780 --> 00:48:28,906 Better than before. 1050 00:48:28,990 --> 00:48:30,366 Yeah, the skip was really cool. 1051 00:48:32,243 --> 00:48:34,746 Hey. Do you mind? Bowler's etiquette. 1052 00:48:34,871 --> 00:48:36,956 - What do you mean? - It means you're crowding me. 1053 00:48:37,081 --> 00:48:38,708 What? You can't bowl with me here? 1054 00:48:42,336 --> 00:48:43,463 That sounded like a strike. 1055 00:48:50,136 --> 00:48:51,471 How's your hearing? 1056 00:48:52,805 --> 00:48:54,724 - Dylan, come on, buddy, you're up! - All right. 1057 00:48:54,891 --> 00:48:57,518 Let's go. Hey, come on. You can do this, okay? 1058 00:48:57,685 --> 00:49:00,062 Whoa, whoa, whoa! What's with the kiddie stuff? 1059 00:49:00,271 --> 00:49:01,564 - What? The rails? - Yeah. 1060 00:49:01,647 --> 00:49:03,357 It's how the kids learn how to bowl, Dad. 1061 00:49:03,483 --> 00:49:05,359 You learn by fearing the gutter. 1062 00:49:05,443 --> 00:49:06,611 Like in life, Dusty. 1063 00:49:06,694 --> 00:49:10,323 Now, Kurt. The rails help a young bowler build a positive self-image. 1064 00:49:10,698 --> 00:49:12,366 Dylan, come here. 1065 00:49:13,576 --> 00:49:15,286 Do you want to bowl with those sissy rails up, 1066 00:49:15,495 --> 00:49:17,789 or do you want to stand and bowl like a man? 1067 00:49:19,081 --> 00:49:21,626 - I don't need the rails, I guess. - Attaboy! I'm proud of you, kid. 1068 00:49:21,793 --> 00:49:23,795 Hey, I'm proud of you too, big guy, all right? 1069 00:49:23,878 --> 00:49:25,421 Dylan's going without the rails. 1070 00:49:25,505 --> 00:49:28,090 No rails? Whoo! all right, Dylan! 1071 00:49:28,257 --> 00:49:30,259 Don't be afraid to release it high. 1072 00:49:30,468 --> 00:49:32,094 Here we go. 1073 00:49:32,595 --> 00:49:33,805 Good try. 1074 00:49:34,430 --> 00:49:36,891 When he's up there with the tears and "I suck at everything" business, 1075 00:49:37,016 --> 00:49:38,601 that's on you, Mr. School of Hard Knocks. 1076 00:49:38,684 --> 00:49:40,311 Hey, better than him living in your basement 1077 00:49:40,394 --> 00:49:41,687 in twenty years, Mr. Sissy Rails. 1078 00:49:45,983 --> 00:49:47,443 Come on, buddy. Give it another shot. 1079 00:49:47,527 --> 00:49:49,320 Okay. New start, new beginning. Here we go. 1080 00:49:54,492 --> 00:49:55,618 Yay! 1081 00:49:57,203 --> 00:49:58,621 Oh, yeah. 1082 00:50:09,549 --> 00:50:11,759 Are we certain he understands the game? 1083 00:50:12,134 --> 00:50:14,679 He seems to almost be trying to put it in the gutter. 1084 00:50:14,762 --> 00:50:16,514 I know. He needs to get more height on the ball. 1085 00:50:32,154 --> 00:50:34,866 I hate this frickin' game! It's so frickin' stupid! 1086 00:50:36,576 --> 00:50:38,202 Hey, everybody, check it out! 1087 00:50:38,286 --> 00:50:40,037 This kid's about to bowl a perfect zero. 1088 00:50:40,121 --> 00:50:41,121 Hey, mind your business! 1089 00:50:43,457 --> 00:50:45,501 How do you think this is gonna make him feel about himself? 1090 00:50:45,585 --> 00:50:47,211 Well, this is character building. 1091 00:50:47,420 --> 00:50:48,671 Even the ridicule. 1092 00:50:49,422 --> 00:50:51,007 Come on, bud. Come on, Dylan! 1093 00:50:51,215 --> 00:50:53,175 It's okay… 1094 00:50:53,342 --> 00:50:55,094 I suck at everything! 1095 00:50:55,177 --> 00:50:57,179 I quit, I quit! 1096 00:50:58,014 --> 00:51:00,516 Hey. Hey, kid, listen. 1097 00:51:02,476 --> 00:51:05,187 We Mayron men might not always show up. 1098 00:51:05,688 --> 00:51:07,648 I mean, we want to show up, we intend to, 1099 00:51:07,773 --> 00:51:09,817 but sometimes, we get trashed the night before, 1100 00:51:09,901 --> 00:51:11,235 or we wreck a speedboat, 1101 00:51:11,360 --> 00:51:13,696 or hook up with some Emirates flight attendants 1102 00:51:14,113 --> 00:51:16,532 and somehow end up on a red-eye to Dubai. 1103 00:51:17,491 --> 00:51:18,492 You know what I mean. 1104 00:51:19,118 --> 00:51:21,287 The point is, we may not always show up, 1105 00:51:21,412 --> 00:51:23,956 but when we do, we finish what we start. 1106 00:51:24,206 --> 00:51:26,292 Now you get up there and grab those balls. 1107 00:51:31,923 --> 00:51:33,090 Come on, you got this. 1108 00:51:41,807 --> 00:51:43,392 Go, bro! 1109 00:51:43,476 --> 00:51:44,852 I'll take that. 1110 00:51:45,978 --> 00:51:47,104 I'll cover that. 1111 00:51:49,649 --> 00:51:51,108 Come on, honey! 1112 00:51:52,401 --> 00:51:54,278 - Come on, buddy. - You can do it, kid. 1113 00:52:06,958 --> 00:52:08,459 Please, please… 1114 00:52:24,725 --> 00:52:25,768 Whoo! I did it! 1115 00:52:28,604 --> 00:52:30,690 Thanks for believing in me, El Padre! 1116 00:52:30,773 --> 00:52:33,442 You bet, buddy! I knew you had it in you! 1117 00:52:35,736 --> 00:52:38,364 You're a winner! You're a winner! 1118 00:52:39,907 --> 00:52:40,908 I did it! 1119 00:52:48,833 --> 00:52:51,585 Hey, where were you guys? We're almost at the front of the line. 1120 00:52:51,669 --> 00:52:54,130 We were at the Starbucks checking out the local talent. 1121 00:52:54,255 --> 00:52:56,882 Cute little number at the next table was giving this one the eye. 1122 00:52:56,966 --> 00:52:59,552 And El Padre got a phone number from the lady who made the coffees. 1123 00:52:59,635 --> 00:53:00,761 We got free ones! 1124 00:53:03,556 --> 00:53:05,766 - I drink coffee now. - What? Get in here. 1125 00:53:06,100 --> 00:53:07,143 Big jump! 1126 00:53:07,226 --> 00:53:08,644 Welcome to the North Pole! 1127 00:53:12,606 --> 00:53:15,443 Hey, honey, are you sure you don't want to go see Santa with the boys? 1128 00:53:15,526 --> 00:53:16,694 You were so excited. 1129 00:53:18,738 --> 00:53:20,906 Mom, Santa is so lame. 1130 00:53:21,741 --> 00:53:23,868 - Come on. - He can hear you, you know! 1131 00:53:25,745 --> 00:53:27,621 You know, I'm sorry, um… 1132 00:53:28,497 --> 00:53:31,500 My daughter thinks that your daughter is amazing. 1133 00:53:31,709 --> 00:53:33,127 Oh, that's sweet. 1134 00:53:34,837 --> 00:53:36,714 Which is cute, you're right, 1135 00:53:36,839 --> 00:53:39,425 but sometimes when Adrianna does certain things, 1136 00:53:39,508 --> 00:53:42,261 then Megan thinks that it's okay to do it because you said that… 1137 00:53:47,558 --> 00:53:48,684 Oh, my God. 1138 00:53:49,435 --> 00:53:51,062 Are you really stealing right now? 1139 00:53:51,145 --> 00:53:53,022 Sometimes I shoplift a little bit. 1140 00:53:53,105 --> 00:53:54,106 It's exciting! 1141 00:53:55,274 --> 00:53:57,943 No! I mean… Okay, yeah, it's a little exciting. 1142 00:53:58,027 --> 00:53:59,862 My heart's really beating out of my chest. 1143 00:53:59,987 --> 00:54:01,989 What if we get caught? You got to put it back! 1144 00:54:02,073 --> 00:54:03,282 You're so obedient. 1145 00:54:03,365 --> 00:54:04,909 You're always following the rules. 1146 00:54:04,992 --> 00:54:05,993 Come on, Sara. 1147 00:54:06,118 --> 00:54:07,578 Have a little fun with me. Relax. 1148 00:54:07,703 --> 00:54:09,789 I mean, I'd love to have a little fun with you, 1149 00:54:09,872 --> 00:54:12,208 but I just want you to know, I am not obedient, okay? 1150 00:54:12,291 --> 00:54:14,752 - Then put this in your pants. - No. No, thank you. 1151 00:54:14,835 --> 00:54:17,004 And don't touch my boobs. It's weird. 1152 00:54:17,171 --> 00:54:19,465 Stop it! I'm not going to shoplift! 1153 00:54:19,673 --> 00:54:21,092 - Why not? - Because… 1154 00:54:21,634 --> 00:54:23,552 Because you're about to see why. 1155 00:54:23,803 --> 00:54:25,346 - Pardon me, miss? - Yes? 1156 00:54:25,471 --> 00:54:27,598 - Is this woman bothering you? - What? 1157 00:54:27,681 --> 00:54:30,976 She's a little judgmental, but she's fine. Thank you. 1158 00:54:31,268 --> 00:54:32,311 No worries. 1159 00:54:40,486 --> 00:54:42,196 Welcome to the North Pole! 1160 00:54:42,321 --> 00:54:44,031 And what do you want for Christmas? 1161 00:54:50,454 --> 00:54:51,956 Oh, I didn't miss it. Hi! 1162 00:54:52,081 --> 00:54:54,333 Right there. This is a great shot. 1163 00:54:54,416 --> 00:54:56,752 - Are you getting it, honey? - Yeah, I got a good one. 1164 00:54:56,836 --> 00:54:58,003 That's a great shot. 1165 00:54:58,712 --> 00:54:59,797 Thank you, Santa. 1166 00:54:59,880 --> 00:55:01,215 - You're welcome! - Hi, honey. 1167 00:55:01,298 --> 00:55:02,800 What about you, big brother? 1168 00:55:02,925 --> 00:55:05,052 I'm sure you've been good. What's on your list? 1169 00:55:05,344 --> 00:55:07,179 I kind of want… 1170 00:55:07,388 --> 00:55:08,722 a 20-gauge shotgun, 1171 00:55:08,806 --> 00:55:10,724 so I can go turkey hunting with my El Padre! 1172 00:55:10,808 --> 00:55:13,644 - Where'd he come up with that? - Did he just ask for a firearm? 1173 00:55:13,727 --> 00:55:15,813 Sure did! Twenty-gauge. Kid knows his guns. 1174 00:55:15,896 --> 00:55:17,648 Kurt, we've already been through this. Dusty and I… 1175 00:55:17,731 --> 00:55:19,608 Yeah, it is final. That's it. It's not happening. 1176 00:55:19,692 --> 00:55:22,069 Really? Because I don't remember being part of that discussion. 1177 00:55:22,194 --> 00:55:25,156 Or am I just some little obedient wife who does whatever the menfolk say? 1178 00:55:25,447 --> 00:55:28,367 - Yeah, that doesn't seem quite fair to me. - Oh, piss off, Kurt. 1179 00:55:28,450 --> 00:55:30,161 Honey, he's talking about a gun. 1180 00:55:30,244 --> 00:55:32,663 If I may, can I just… 1181 00:55:33,080 --> 00:55:35,833 have a word with my grandson? 1182 00:55:36,584 --> 00:55:40,129 I just want you to fully understand what you're asking for. 1183 00:55:40,212 --> 00:55:43,215 To take a gun into the wilderness, 1184 00:55:43,674 --> 00:55:46,218 find an animal living free, 1185 00:55:46,302 --> 00:55:48,345 and take away its life. 1186 00:55:48,554 --> 00:55:50,431 So that it can never breathe or run 1187 00:55:51,348 --> 00:55:53,601 or play ever again. 1188 00:55:54,351 --> 00:55:56,061 Now, is that what you really want? 1189 00:55:56,270 --> 00:55:57,563 Yes. 1190 00:55:58,397 --> 00:56:00,774 - No. I don't want to do that. - Ah. 1191 00:56:00,858 --> 00:56:02,484 You have a good heart, Dylan. 1192 00:56:02,693 --> 00:56:04,486 I'll do it! I'll kill a turkey! 1193 00:56:04,653 --> 00:56:06,197 Can I shoot one? Please? 1194 00:56:07,531 --> 00:56:09,575 I'll have one shotgun, please, Santa. 1195 00:56:09,658 --> 00:56:11,493 And gobs and gobs of bullets. 1196 00:56:11,619 --> 00:56:13,787 No, no, no, cupcake. No, I'm sorry. 1197 00:56:13,996 --> 00:56:17,249 No, the men do the hunting. You ladies cook what we kill. 1198 00:56:18,083 --> 00:56:19,083 Excuse me? 1199 00:56:20,669 --> 00:56:22,254 Yeah, excuse you? 1200 00:56:22,755 --> 00:56:24,506 Here, turkey, turkey, turkey! 1201 00:56:24,673 --> 00:56:27,176 Be patient, sweetheart. The decoys are right around the corner. 1202 00:56:27,259 --> 00:56:28,594 This is nice, huh, Dust? 1203 00:56:28,719 --> 00:56:31,138 You and me, the fresh air. Just like old times. 1204 00:56:31,222 --> 00:56:33,766 What do you mean "like old times"? You only took me once, Dad. 1205 00:56:33,974 --> 00:56:35,184 Jeez, I don't know. 1206 00:56:35,351 --> 00:56:37,061 Are you sure this is a good idea, Sara? 1207 00:56:37,144 --> 00:56:39,063 Megan is a strong, independent woman. 1208 00:56:39,230 --> 00:56:41,315 If she wants to help thin the wild turkey population 1209 00:56:41,398 --> 00:56:43,525 so that they don't starve to death in the winter, 1210 00:56:43,609 --> 00:56:45,277 that is her right by the Second Amendment. 1211 00:56:45,402 --> 00:56:47,071 Boy, you bought into that real quick. 1212 00:56:47,238 --> 00:56:48,530 I mean, I think for Megan, 1213 00:56:48,614 --> 00:56:51,200 this is less about wildlife conservation and more about blood lust. 1214 00:56:51,325 --> 00:56:53,911 Looks like somebody picked the wrong day to be a turkey. 1215 00:56:54,328 --> 00:56:56,830 Keep your elbow down and cradle the stock, okay. 1216 00:56:56,914 --> 00:56:57,957 Yeah, I get it. 1217 00:56:58,040 --> 00:56:59,500 Can I shoot the damn thing or not? 1218 00:56:59,583 --> 00:57:01,001 Yeah, that's the spirit. 1219 00:57:01,418 --> 00:57:02,920 Take a deep breath, 1220 00:57:03,212 --> 00:57:05,965 and then squeeze that trigger as you're letting it out. 1221 00:57:07,549 --> 00:57:09,593 Megan, are you sure this is what you want to do? 1222 00:57:09,718 --> 00:57:11,387 Let's name it. 1223 00:57:11,470 --> 00:57:13,097 She's not gonna kill it if it has a name. 1224 00:57:13,222 --> 00:57:15,683 - Yes! Gertrude. - Sam? Tom? 1225 00:57:15,808 --> 00:57:17,142 Billie Holiday! No. 1226 00:57:17,226 --> 00:57:18,435 - Elijah. - Elijah! 1227 00:57:18,560 --> 00:57:20,396 - Elijah, run home! - Stand your ground, kid. 1228 00:57:20,479 --> 00:57:21,465 Save yourself, Elijah! 1229 00:57:21,480 --> 00:57:22,523 Take the shot, kid. 1230 00:57:22,606 --> 00:57:23,857 No, Elijah has feelings! 1231 00:57:23,941 --> 00:57:24,941 Take the shot! 1232 00:57:26,986 --> 00:57:28,070 Oh, God! 1233 00:57:28,529 --> 00:57:29,530 Dad! 1234 00:57:29,697 --> 00:57:31,532 Oh, my God. Honey, are you okay? 1235 00:57:31,615 --> 00:57:32,992 - Kurt! - Dad, are you all right? 1236 00:57:33,075 --> 00:57:34,451 I'm okay. She just winged me. 1237 00:57:34,535 --> 00:57:36,161 I'm sorry, El Padre! I'm sorry. 1238 00:57:36,245 --> 00:57:38,706 That's okay, kid. I've been shot worse than this plenty of times. 1239 00:57:38,789 --> 00:57:40,374 Make your scarf into a tourniquet. 1240 00:57:40,457 --> 00:57:42,084 Wrap it around his shoulder. 1241 00:57:42,167 --> 00:57:43,711 Lift his legs! 1242 00:57:43,794 --> 00:57:45,754 - You'll be fine, sweetheart. - I'm gonna bleed out. 1243 00:57:53,512 --> 00:57:54,512 Wow. 1244 00:57:54,680 --> 00:57:55,723 Two for two. 1245 00:57:55,931 --> 00:57:57,224 Makes getting shot worth it. 1246 00:57:57,308 --> 00:57:58,559 Get the birds, Brad. 1247 00:57:58,934 --> 00:58:01,312 God! I don't know who this child is. 1248 00:58:01,395 --> 00:58:02,521 You get that one. 1249 00:58:11,196 --> 00:58:12,531 What? I know, okay? 1250 00:58:13,073 --> 00:58:15,200 It's on me. I'm the worst mom in the world. 1251 00:58:15,492 --> 00:58:18,912 I put a gun in my daughter's hand, and then she nearly killed somebody. 1252 00:58:19,288 --> 00:58:21,123 She's gonna be scarred for life. 1253 00:58:21,999 --> 00:58:23,042 Hi! 1254 00:58:23,167 --> 00:58:25,127 I just shot a turkey and a man. 1255 00:58:25,377 --> 00:58:26,754 Guess which one's dead. 1256 00:58:31,842 --> 00:58:34,178 Okay, fine, maybe she's a little too unscarred. 1257 00:58:34,553 --> 00:58:35,596 Jeez. 1258 00:58:40,642 --> 00:58:42,144 - You all right? - Yeah, good. 1259 00:58:42,311 --> 00:58:44,813 So, listen, the doctor said everything is gonna be all right. 1260 00:58:44,897 --> 00:58:46,648 He just wants to keep you for a couple of hours 1261 00:58:46,732 --> 00:58:47,733 to watch your blood pressure. 1262 00:58:47,816 --> 00:58:49,443 I'm fine. Where's my pants? 1263 00:58:49,526 --> 00:58:51,362 Hey. I forgot. Nothing ever hurts you. 1264 00:58:51,445 --> 00:58:53,947 Why don't we just round up all the nurses? Bring them in here. 1265 00:58:54,031 --> 00:58:56,325 You could do some push-ups for them, maybe bench press the couch, 1266 00:58:56,408 --> 00:58:57,576 prove you're still a tough guy. 1267 00:58:57,659 --> 00:58:59,828 Still tough enough to lick you, Junior. 1268 00:58:59,953 --> 00:59:01,288 - Was that a scoff? - I didn't scoff. 1269 00:59:01,372 --> 00:59:03,665 - I heard you scoff just then. - All right, I scoffed. So what? 1270 00:59:03,791 --> 00:59:05,167 Because you think you can lick me, right? 1271 00:59:05,250 --> 00:59:07,211 I never said I could lick you, but I could whoop you for sure. 1272 00:59:07,294 --> 00:59:08,297 Now we're talking! 1273 00:59:08,387 --> 00:59:09,772 Come on. Best out of three falls. 1274 00:59:09,897 --> 00:59:11,423 Cut it out. I'm not gonna wrestle an old man 1275 00:59:11,507 --> 00:59:13,175 whose ass is hanging out of his hospital gown. 1276 00:59:13,300 --> 00:59:14,635 Greco-Roman style. Best way. C'mon. 1277 00:59:14,718 --> 00:59:16,720 Hey, Great Santini, I'm not gonna do this, all right? 1278 00:59:16,887 --> 00:59:18,514 Cut it out. Get some rest. All right. 1279 00:59:18,597 --> 00:59:19,597 Hey! 1280 00:59:19,681 --> 00:59:22,309 That's one, candy-ass. 1281 00:59:22,393 --> 00:59:25,145 - Now you're gonna get whipped, old man. - Come on. Bring it on. 1282 00:59:30,401 --> 00:59:32,986 - Tap out! - Nah. I can keep going all night, kid. 1283 00:59:33,112 --> 00:59:35,239 You hear that heart rate? You can set your watch to it. 1284 00:59:35,322 --> 00:59:37,116 'Cause ice water only flows at one speed, huh? 1285 00:59:37,199 --> 00:59:39,076 That's right, pal. Now go to sleep. 1286 00:59:39,159 --> 00:59:41,495 I came in to say something nice, but now you can forget it. 1287 00:59:42,287 --> 00:59:43,330 What nice thing? 1288 00:59:43,414 --> 00:59:44,665 No. Forget it. 1289 00:59:44,832 --> 00:59:48,028 You know, when that gun went off, I thought you were a goner. 1290 00:59:48,127 --> 00:59:50,838 There's something that we never say that one of us should say before it's too late. 1291 00:59:53,340 --> 00:59:55,050 Yeah? Like… Like what? 1292 00:59:55,217 --> 00:59:57,803 No, I'm not gonna say it now, but maybe you want to say something. 1293 00:59:57,886 --> 00:59:59,888 - I don't know what you're talking about. - Oh, yeah? 1294 00:59:59,972 --> 01:00:02,349 Seems like you might want to get something off your chest. 1295 01:00:02,433 --> 01:00:03,517 No. Nothing comes to mind. 1296 01:00:03,600 --> 01:00:06,145 But if you wanna say something, I'm not gonna stop you or anything. 1297 01:00:06,228 --> 01:00:07,214 No, I'm good. 1298 01:00:07,229 --> 01:00:09,690 But you might wanna unburden yourself before you bust that machine. 1299 01:00:09,815 --> 01:00:13,068 Yeah. Well, if I was gonna say something, and I'm not… 1300 01:00:13,152 --> 01:00:15,821 - What are you gonna say? - But if I was, I might wanna tell you… 1301 01:00:15,946 --> 01:00:17,364 Hello? 1302 01:00:17,448 --> 01:00:18,615 Wait, it's Brad! Don't say it! 1303 01:00:18,699 --> 01:00:20,033 - Knock, knock! - On three… 1304 01:00:20,159 --> 01:00:21,660 - One, two, three. - Hey, Brad. 1305 01:00:22,578 --> 01:00:23,620 What's going on? 1306 01:00:23,704 --> 01:00:25,205 Hey. Am I interrupting something? 1307 01:00:25,289 --> 01:00:26,748 - What? No, nothing. - No, we're fine. 1308 01:00:26,832 --> 01:00:28,250 Why are you being so weird, Brad? 1309 01:00:28,375 --> 01:00:30,711 Just seems a little awkward in here. 1310 01:00:30,794 --> 01:00:32,921 Oh, gosh. It smells like a bullfight. 1311 01:00:33,005 --> 01:00:34,131 So, look, guys, 1312 01:00:34,548 --> 01:00:36,341 I'm not here to tell you I told you so, 1313 01:00:36,633 --> 01:00:37,633 even though I did. 1314 01:00:38,343 --> 01:00:40,053 I've just been thinking that 1315 01:00:40,179 --> 01:00:42,389 we've had a lot of tensions as of late, and I thought 1316 01:00:42,473 --> 01:00:44,766 maybe we could use a Dads' Night Out. Right? 1317 01:00:44,850 --> 01:00:47,227 Yeah. So what are we thinking, Brad? 1318 01:00:47,352 --> 01:00:48,395 Strip club? 1319 01:00:48,812 --> 01:00:50,314 Even better. 1320 01:00:51,148 --> 01:00:54,610 Look, it's a cute tiny monkey on your back. 1321 01:00:58,363 --> 01:01:01,283 Give us all the money in the drawers and all the lollipops. 1322 01:01:05,704 --> 01:01:07,206 Guys, I can't keep up. 1323 01:01:16,965 --> 01:01:18,175 I'm gonna hit the head. 1324 01:01:18,258 --> 01:01:20,177 - I'll get us a couple more drinks. - Sure. 1325 01:01:20,260 --> 01:01:22,596 Hey, am I crazy or are you guys having a good time? 1326 01:01:22,679 --> 01:01:24,223 I don't know. I think we kind of are. 1327 01:01:24,306 --> 01:01:27,309 - That's wonderful, Dusty! - Thanks, Don. 1328 01:01:27,392 --> 01:01:29,102 I told you we'd rub off on you two. 1329 01:01:29,186 --> 01:01:30,896 In this room right now, 1330 01:01:31,063 --> 01:01:33,982 there's a man who, despite his advancing years, 1331 01:01:34,149 --> 01:01:36,360 is apparently an improv ninja. 1332 01:01:37,069 --> 01:01:38,403 Brad, you didn't. 1333 01:01:38,654 --> 01:01:41,198 I did. I so did! 1334 01:01:41,406 --> 01:01:43,367 Don Whitaker, ladies and gentlemen! 1335 01:01:43,575 --> 01:01:46,119 All right, all right. 1336 01:01:48,664 --> 01:01:50,082 You are the greatest. 1337 01:01:52,459 --> 01:01:54,169 Don! Let's hear it for Don! 1338 01:01:55,087 --> 01:01:57,673 We're gonna play a little "Arms Akimbo." Do you know that one? 1339 01:01:57,756 --> 01:01:58,882 - Of course I do! - Awesome. 1340 01:01:58,966 --> 01:02:00,342 They're gonna love this. 1341 01:02:00,467 --> 01:02:02,844 - Can somebody do my Velcro? - Yes. 1342 01:02:03,262 --> 01:02:05,055 He's got tiny little girl arms! 1343 01:02:06,932 --> 01:02:10,352 Okay. We're gonna do a scene, and we need some suggestions. 1344 01:02:10,435 --> 01:02:12,020 Can you suggest an animal? 1345 01:02:12,145 --> 01:02:13,605 - Raccoon! - A panda! 1346 01:02:13,689 --> 01:02:15,566 Raccoon, good! All right. 1347 01:02:15,649 --> 01:02:17,359 And, sir, what is your profession? 1348 01:02:17,484 --> 01:02:18,902 I'm a dermatologist. 1349 01:02:18,986 --> 01:02:21,780 And finally we need a human relationship. 1350 01:02:21,905 --> 01:02:24,700 Oh! Father and son! A healthy father and son relationship. 1351 01:02:24,908 --> 01:02:26,410 Or how about a divorce? 1352 01:02:27,953 --> 01:02:30,998 - Now you're getting in the spirit, Dusty. - Yes. Okay. We're taking "divorce." 1353 01:02:31,081 --> 01:02:32,374 That's all we need. Give it up! 1354 01:02:32,499 --> 01:02:33,959 That's really dark. 1355 01:02:34,793 --> 01:02:37,546 Oh, come on, babe. Just a little fun before he gets here. 1356 01:02:37,629 --> 01:02:39,089 No. Stop it. I told you, okay? 1357 01:02:39,172 --> 01:02:41,425 No canoodling until the divorce is finalized. 1358 01:02:41,550 --> 01:02:43,093 - It's not right. - Come on. 1359 01:02:43,302 --> 01:02:44,720 Knock, knock. 1360 01:02:45,053 --> 01:02:47,806 He has no idea what he's walking into! 1361 01:02:49,182 --> 01:02:50,601 You're home! 1362 01:02:50,684 --> 01:02:51,727 Yes. 1363 01:02:53,020 --> 01:02:54,020 Where were you? 1364 01:02:55,647 --> 01:02:58,233 I took our raccoon to the dermatologist. 1365 01:02:58,817 --> 01:03:00,485 He got two of the suggestions already. 1366 01:03:00,569 --> 01:03:01,653 He's on fire! 1367 01:03:01,820 --> 01:03:04,114 Aren't you even gonna address the strange man in your home? 1368 01:03:04,239 --> 01:03:06,867 Yeah, bro, don't you even want to know who I am? 1369 01:03:07,618 --> 01:03:08,785 I know who you are. 1370 01:03:08,994 --> 01:03:10,829 Don, if you'll excuse me, 1371 01:03:10,912 --> 01:03:12,748 I think I'm gonna start giving it to your wife. 1372 01:03:13,165 --> 01:03:14,333 Shut up! 1373 01:03:14,416 --> 01:03:16,752 Just shut up with that kind of talk! 1374 01:03:17,252 --> 01:03:20,088 When we met on that flight, I was really nice to you. 1375 01:03:20,255 --> 01:03:24,217 I listened to you tell your stupid story over and over again, 1376 01:03:24,509 --> 01:03:26,178 and I complimented your hat! 1377 01:03:29,848 --> 01:03:32,434 - Brad, we have to stop this. - He's killing! 1378 01:03:32,517 --> 01:03:33,727 Don't you see what's happening? 1379 01:03:33,810 --> 01:03:35,771 I do. I see a room of people laughing at my father. 1380 01:03:35,854 --> 01:03:36,854 - It's amazing. - Okay. 1381 01:03:36,938 --> 01:03:39,733 - Have some water. - No, I don't want water. 1382 01:03:44,196 --> 01:03:45,364 I don't want water! 1383 01:03:45,447 --> 01:03:47,032 I want my wife back. 1384 01:03:47,532 --> 01:03:50,952 And I want our Sunday brunches at the Cracker Barrel. 1385 01:03:51,328 --> 01:03:53,747 Braddie, we've got to get him off the stage. 1386 01:03:53,830 --> 01:03:56,333 All you needed was somebody to listen to you, 1387 01:03:57,417 --> 01:03:58,877 and all I do is talk. 1388 01:03:59,419 --> 01:04:00,796 On and on and on. 1389 01:04:00,879 --> 01:04:04,466 When am I ever gonna learn to shut my big fat mouth? 1390 01:04:04,841 --> 01:04:05,841 Ooh. 1391 01:04:06,510 --> 01:04:07,678 Ginny. 1392 01:04:09,429 --> 01:04:10,429 Ginny. 1393 01:04:11,223 --> 01:04:13,058 My sweet Ginny… 1394 01:04:13,141 --> 01:04:15,060 Why is he using my mom's real name? 1395 01:04:18,105 --> 01:04:19,189 Hey, Dad? 1396 01:04:20,565 --> 01:04:21,566 Is this true? 1397 01:04:23,527 --> 01:04:25,028 Are you and Mom divorced? 1398 01:04:27,447 --> 01:04:29,074 I wanted to tell you, Brad. 1399 01:04:33,286 --> 01:04:35,789 Son, you're home from summer camp! 1400 01:04:37,666 --> 01:04:40,669 I don't go to summer camp, I'm a grown man. Okay? 1401 01:04:45,215 --> 01:04:47,634 Why are you laughing? I'm not part of this! Okay? 1402 01:04:47,759 --> 01:04:50,679 You are a part of this family, and you will respect your parents. 1403 01:04:50,762 --> 01:04:52,097 - Yeah. - Shut up! 1404 01:04:52,180 --> 01:04:54,224 - Brad… - Just shut up. Let me out of this bit! 1405 01:04:54,683 --> 01:04:56,601 What about him? Is he still around? 1406 01:04:56,727 --> 01:04:58,103 Do I have a stepdad? 1407 01:05:00,147 --> 01:05:02,983 Stop doing that to me! I'm a paying customer! 1408 01:05:04,234 --> 01:05:05,360 Brad, let's go. 1409 01:05:06,862 --> 01:05:07,988 Come on. 1410 01:05:17,497 --> 01:05:20,208 Will you please just go out there and talk to him? 1411 01:05:20,292 --> 01:05:22,502 He won't talk to me, and I don't blame him. 1412 01:05:23,962 --> 01:05:26,548 You know, it's not really all your fault. 1413 01:05:27,215 --> 01:05:28,675 You can't blame Dusty. 1414 01:05:29,092 --> 01:05:33,054 He couldn't have known about Ginny and me when he made that improv suggestion. 1415 01:05:34,931 --> 01:05:37,434 - You did know! - It was pretty obvious, Don. 1416 01:05:37,517 --> 01:05:40,353 A guy your age either joins an improv group because his wife left him, 1417 01:05:40,437 --> 01:05:42,314 or his wife left him because he joined an improv group. 1418 01:05:42,481 --> 01:05:44,941 - So you did it on purpose? - No! Well… 1419 01:05:45,442 --> 01:05:47,152 Well, yeah. All right? I did. 1420 01:05:47,277 --> 01:05:49,446 You and Brad are all lovey-dovey and smug about your relationship. 1421 01:05:49,529 --> 01:05:50,864 You make out every chance you get. 1422 01:05:50,947 --> 01:05:52,491 Meanwhile, my dad's ditching out on me. 1423 01:05:52,574 --> 01:05:54,159 Maybe I got a little jealous, all right? 1424 01:05:54,242 --> 01:05:55,911 Look, I didn't think you were gonna freak out 1425 01:05:55,994 --> 01:05:58,038 and spill your guts to a room full of drunken skiers! 1426 01:05:58,121 --> 01:05:59,998 - Hey. What is wrong with you? - What? I didn't… 1427 01:06:00,081 --> 01:06:01,792 Go out there and fix this right now. 1428 01:06:01,875 --> 01:06:03,001 - Go! - All right. 1429 01:06:07,881 --> 01:06:09,174 Are you serious? 1430 01:06:09,382 --> 01:06:10,509 I'm keeping this. 1431 01:06:33,031 --> 01:06:34,115 Are you okay? 1432 01:06:35,909 --> 01:06:36,909 Uh… 1433 01:06:37,661 --> 01:06:39,079 My parents are divorced. 1434 01:06:39,579 --> 01:06:40,789 Oh. Mine, too. 1435 01:06:41,289 --> 01:06:42,289 Sucks. 1436 01:06:42,791 --> 01:06:44,876 - Yeah. - I think it was my fault. 1437 01:06:45,752 --> 01:06:49,256 - Was yours your fault, too? - I don't know. I hope not. 1438 01:06:49,339 --> 01:06:51,466 I just found out last night. When did you find out? 1439 01:06:51,591 --> 01:06:53,969 - I was a baby. - When you were a baby? 1440 01:06:54,511 --> 01:06:56,972 Maybe it was your fault. Were you a difficult baby? 1441 01:06:57,639 --> 01:06:58,932 I don't know. 1442 01:06:59,099 --> 01:07:02,269 You know what? Your lack of specifics leads me to believe it was your fault. 1443 01:07:02,352 --> 01:07:04,896 No, no, no! You were not a difficult baby, sweetheart. 1444 01:07:04,980 --> 01:07:06,523 Brad, dude, what are you telling the kid? 1445 01:07:06,606 --> 01:07:08,900 Come on, man. I know you're upset about last night. 1446 01:07:09,025 --> 01:07:10,527 I'm sorry about what happened, okay? 1447 01:07:10,610 --> 01:07:12,153 I didn't mean to give that improv suggestion. 1448 01:07:12,237 --> 01:07:13,780 It just… It just kind of slipped out. 1449 01:07:15,574 --> 01:07:17,492 - Know what, Dusty? It's okay. - Really? 1450 01:07:17,576 --> 01:07:19,327 - Yeah. - Thanks, Brad. 1451 01:07:19,411 --> 01:07:21,538 Why don't you come in and talk to Don? He's feeling a little… 1452 01:07:21,663 --> 01:07:23,582 Oh, my gosh. I wonder who that could be? 1453 01:07:24,082 --> 01:07:25,917 Ooo, what a nice truck! 1454 01:07:33,925 --> 01:07:34,925 Daddy! 1455 01:07:35,343 --> 01:07:38,763 - What are you doing here? - Come on. What am I doing? 1456 01:07:39,055 --> 01:07:41,391 I want to celebrate Christmas with my perfect little girl. 1457 01:07:41,474 --> 01:07:44,686 Don't you want to spend the holidays with your one true real dad? 1458 01:07:44,769 --> 01:07:46,021 Yeah, come on! 1459 01:07:46,104 --> 01:07:47,898 - Let's come see the cabin. - Hey, Roger. 1460 01:07:47,981 --> 01:07:49,190 It's so cool! 1461 01:07:51,651 --> 01:07:54,154 - Come on, hurry. You're too slow. - I'm coming, sweetheart. 1462 01:07:54,237 --> 01:07:56,448 You invite him all the way up here just to get back at me? 1463 01:07:56,698 --> 01:07:57,699 Yeah, I did. 1464 01:07:59,743 --> 01:08:02,454 - Bye, Kurt! Call me! - Yeah, next time I'm in. 1465 01:08:02,537 --> 01:08:04,581 That's her dad, yeah? 1466 01:08:04,748 --> 01:08:06,958 Uh-huh. 1467 01:08:07,042 --> 01:08:10,003 - And you invited him, too, didn't you? - I sure did, yep. 1468 01:08:10,128 --> 01:08:13,798 I don't know what I missed, but this is getting good, boys. 1469 01:08:15,091 --> 01:08:17,093 - I like your style, Brad. - Hey, hey, hey. 1470 01:08:20,096 --> 01:08:21,598 You're opening up the harbor, Brad. 1471 01:08:21,681 --> 01:08:24,184 The harbor is wide open, and it's Fleet Week! 1472 01:08:24,267 --> 01:08:26,436 Good. 'Cause I got a few boats that want to set sail. 1473 01:08:26,519 --> 01:08:29,147 - Yeah, good. So do I. - You favor little Griffy over my kids. 1474 01:08:29,230 --> 01:08:30,482 What? I do not! 1475 01:08:30,607 --> 01:08:33,109 He gets to sleep in your bed all the time. Megan and Dylan never get to. 1476 01:08:33,193 --> 01:08:36,613 - You want them to sleep in my bed with me? - God, no! Don't you ever think about it! 1477 01:08:36,696 --> 01:08:37,948 I'm not thinking about it! 1478 01:08:38,031 --> 01:08:40,408 - You brought it up. - Good! You better not. 1479 01:08:40,492 --> 01:08:42,410 - You shut up! - No, you shut up! 1480 01:08:42,494 --> 01:08:45,789 Okay, well, he's not gonna be part of that special thing we got planned tonight. 1481 01:08:45,872 --> 01:08:47,582 Oh, yeah? So you're gonna tell Adrianna 1482 01:08:47,666 --> 01:08:49,417 that everyone's invited to that "special thing" 1483 01:08:49,501 --> 01:08:51,753 we have planned for tonight, except her dad. 1484 01:09:28,790 --> 01:09:31,960 Hey. Five more minutes and I get to be Joseph. 1485 01:09:32,210 --> 01:09:34,879 You're not the right type to play Jesus' dad, Brad. 1486 01:09:35,046 --> 01:09:37,799 He wasn't Jesus' dad, he was Jesus' stepdad. 1487 01:09:38,133 --> 01:09:39,801 And I'm exactly the right type. 1488 01:09:40,677 --> 01:09:41,845 You'd better stop hitting me 1489 01:09:41,928 --> 01:09:43,388 with that shepherd stick, Brad. I'm warning you. 1490 01:09:43,471 --> 01:09:45,348 Brad's right. Let him be Joseph. 1491 01:09:45,432 --> 01:09:46,850 Thank you, Roger, I appreciate that. 1492 01:09:46,933 --> 01:09:48,268 It's Brad's turn, Dusty. 1493 01:09:48,351 --> 01:09:51,479 Dad, don't break character. And stop trying to butter me up. 1494 01:09:51,604 --> 01:09:53,857 - Can we show some decorum? - I'm showing decorum. 1495 01:09:54,190 --> 01:09:56,276 You guys, zip it! You're gonna wake up Baby Jesus. 1496 01:09:59,946 --> 01:10:02,699 - That's it. Give me the beard. - Don't touch my Joseph beard, Brad! 1497 01:10:02,782 --> 01:10:04,168 - Give him the beard! - Dad, stay out of it! 1498 01:10:04,252 --> 01:10:05,653 Can we have some respect for the Nativity? 1499 01:10:05,753 --> 01:10:06,911 Cut it out! 1500 01:10:07,287 --> 01:10:09,831 This is stupid. I don't even get it. 1501 01:10:10,165 --> 01:10:12,792 Why go on a trip when Mary's about to have a baby? 1502 01:10:13,001 --> 01:10:14,419 What's so damn important 1503 01:10:14,502 --> 01:10:16,796 you got to go to Bethlehem in the middle of the night? 1504 01:10:16,880 --> 01:10:18,923 There was a census, okay? We covered that in Sunday School. 1505 01:10:19,007 --> 01:10:20,675 Megan, what is going… 1506 01:10:22,135 --> 01:10:25,013 - Did you get into the eggnog? - Hey, who's up for some IHOP? 1507 01:10:25,138 --> 01:10:26,639 Yeah, that kid's pickled all right. 1508 01:10:26,806 --> 01:10:28,767 Mom, you're pretty. Can we go to IHOP? 1509 01:10:29,392 --> 01:10:30,602 I'm sorry, folks. 1510 01:10:30,685 --> 01:10:32,353 Having some technical difficulties. 1511 01:10:32,437 --> 01:10:35,273 Great, Dad. Now you've broken the fourth wall! 1512 01:10:35,690 --> 01:10:37,067 None of it's real, folks. 1513 01:10:37,484 --> 01:10:40,820 I want to go wait in the car. Give me the keys, Brad! 1514 01:10:40,904 --> 01:10:43,114 No, I am not giving you the keys to the car, 1515 01:10:43,198 --> 01:10:45,158 because you're drunk and you're a child. 1516 01:10:45,325 --> 01:10:49,621 Nobody likes your dumb, stupid Brad voice. 1517 01:10:49,954 --> 01:10:51,623 And you smell like pumpkins! 1518 01:10:51,706 --> 01:10:54,334 - And you're a mean drunk. - Kid's got an arm. 1519 01:10:54,459 --> 01:10:56,920 Drunk nine-year-old. Real nice parenting. 1520 01:10:57,128 --> 01:10:58,421 You better watch it, Roger. 1521 01:11:01,132 --> 01:11:02,509 Adrianna! Are you okay, sweetheart? 1522 01:11:02,634 --> 01:11:04,219 - Is she okay? Is she… - What is she… 1523 01:11:06,346 --> 01:11:08,765 Oh. What a shock. Now we know where Megan got the eggnog. 1524 01:11:08,848 --> 01:11:10,767 You always assume she's the bad influence. 1525 01:11:10,934 --> 01:11:13,144 Maybe your daughter plied my daughter with alcohol. 1526 01:11:13,228 --> 01:11:16,147 Maybe your daughter's that way because her mother is a shoplifter. 1527 01:11:16,314 --> 01:11:17,690 Shoplifter. 1528 01:11:18,441 --> 01:11:20,568 Sara, we've been working on the shoplifting thing, okay? 1529 01:11:20,652 --> 01:11:23,238 But that has nothing to do with Adrianna being such a nightmare all the time. 1530 01:11:23,321 --> 01:11:25,657 My daughter is not a nightmare! Come on, Adrianna. 1531 01:11:25,740 --> 01:11:26,950 I didn't mean that. 1532 01:11:27,033 --> 01:11:28,576 - Honey! - Hey. 1533 01:11:28,868 --> 01:11:31,079 - What'd you call my daughter? - He called her a nightmare. 1534 01:11:31,204 --> 01:11:33,414 Hey. I'm a lot of things, but I'm not a heathen. 1535 01:11:33,540 --> 01:11:36,042 - Let's take this outside. - Yeah, let's step outside the manger. 1536 01:11:36,126 --> 01:11:37,377 He called her a nightmare. 1537 01:11:37,460 --> 01:11:39,337 - Here we go. - Now, now, boys. 1538 01:11:39,420 --> 01:11:40,964 We can't just leave! 1539 01:11:41,047 --> 01:11:43,842 Joseph and the Innkeeper rumble outside the manger! 1540 01:11:43,967 --> 01:11:46,636 - Make the first move, Innkeeper. - Kick his ass, Joseph! 1541 01:11:46,719 --> 01:11:48,805 We're not going to do this in front of the children! 1542 01:11:48,888 --> 01:11:51,099 Now, what kind of fathers are you, anyway? 1543 01:11:51,307 --> 01:11:52,392 That's rich! 1544 01:11:52,600 --> 01:11:55,478 Coming from a guy who lies to his son for six months. 1545 01:11:55,603 --> 01:11:58,648 Maybe that's why everyone thinks your stories are so "delightful," 1546 01:11:58,731 --> 01:12:00,567 because they're all lies! 1547 01:12:00,650 --> 01:12:02,360 Sara, get the kids out of here, okay? 1548 01:12:02,443 --> 01:12:05,113 Happily. I don't want them watching this anyway. 1549 01:12:05,280 --> 01:12:06,656 Have fun, morons! 1550 01:12:07,282 --> 01:12:10,160 - Pancakes, bitches! - Do not say "bitches." 1551 01:12:10,243 --> 01:12:11,411 Kids are gone. Let's go. 1552 01:12:11,494 --> 01:12:13,246 I'm not hitting a guy dressed like Joseph. 1553 01:12:13,496 --> 01:12:14,789 The beard's off, Roger. 1554 01:12:14,873 --> 01:12:16,499 How many excuses you want to pull out, man? 1555 01:12:16,583 --> 01:12:17,625 Now it's on. 1556 01:12:17,709 --> 01:12:19,127 - You know what, Brad? - Don! 1557 01:12:19,210 --> 01:12:20,461 Yes, I lied! 1558 01:12:20,587 --> 01:12:23,631 Because whenever there's anything wrong in your life, 1559 01:12:23,798 --> 01:12:25,592 if it isn't roses and rainbows, 1560 01:12:25,717 --> 01:12:27,177 you completely fall apart. 1561 01:12:27,343 --> 01:12:30,847 - I thought we had an honest relationship! - Oh, yeah? Brad, I bet you never told him 1562 01:12:30,930 --> 01:12:32,891 about that procedure you had last year, did you? 1563 01:12:32,974 --> 01:12:34,225 Oh, my God. What procedure? 1564 01:12:34,309 --> 01:12:36,603 It was nothing, just some benign tissue. 1565 01:12:36,769 --> 01:12:39,731 How about that? You're both a couple of lying sacks. 1566 01:12:39,856 --> 01:12:40,856 And, you! 1567 01:12:40,899 --> 01:12:42,150 From the minute you got here, 1568 01:12:42,275 --> 01:12:44,611 you've been nothing but mean and sarcastic. 1569 01:12:44,694 --> 01:12:45,904 Well, you know what, Kurt? 1570 01:12:46,112 --> 01:12:47,572 - "F" you! - Dad! 1571 01:12:47,697 --> 01:12:49,157 That's right. Forget you! 1572 01:12:49,365 --> 01:12:51,618 Attaboy, swami. Throwing down F words. 1573 01:12:51,701 --> 01:12:53,870 Not the F word, but an F word. That's a good start. 1574 01:12:53,953 --> 01:12:55,622 Now, c'mon, give me the finger, big boy. 1575 01:12:55,705 --> 01:12:57,165 - Come on. - Hey! Hey! 1576 01:12:57,290 --> 01:12:59,167 Are we gonna still fight or what? 1577 01:12:59,250 --> 01:13:01,502 Roger brings up a good point. Let's get the momentum back. 1578 01:13:01,669 --> 01:13:03,922 Come on, Roger. Get some! Let's get in there! 1579 01:13:04,005 --> 01:13:06,507 - Come on! - No, no, no, no, no! 1580 01:13:06,674 --> 01:13:10,345 If you lay one hand on each other, whether the kids are here or not, 1581 01:13:10,470 --> 01:13:13,223 it will negatively impact them. 1582 01:13:13,348 --> 01:13:15,475 All right. I'm not gonna lay a hand on him. 1583 01:13:17,352 --> 01:13:18,686 What are you doing? 1584 01:13:18,770 --> 01:13:21,564 Oh. Oh, I see. Yeah, yeah. Snowball fight. 1585 01:13:21,648 --> 01:13:24,484 I've got some Nerf guns in the back of my car. 1586 01:13:24,567 --> 01:13:25,818 Want me to get them? 1587 01:13:25,902 --> 01:13:27,904 I pitched triple-A for the Red Sox in their farm system. 1588 01:13:27,987 --> 01:13:30,073 - Don't say I didn't warn you. - Take your best shot. 1589 01:13:35,370 --> 01:13:36,412 Dad! 1590 01:13:36,663 --> 01:13:38,081 Don, I'm sorry! 1591 01:13:39,457 --> 01:13:40,708 That sucks. 1592 01:13:41,167 --> 01:13:43,503 - I'm so sorry. - No, no, it was all right. 1593 01:13:46,089 --> 01:13:48,758 - Hey, no fair. That's an ice ball. - You bet it is. 1594 01:13:48,841 --> 01:13:50,843 You throw that and we are no longer co-dads. 1595 01:13:50,927 --> 01:13:52,220 I'm way ahead of you, dickhead. 1596 01:13:52,303 --> 01:13:54,806 You know, from now on, we'll just act like a normal blended family 1597 01:13:54,889 --> 01:13:56,015 with me hating your guts. 1598 01:13:56,224 --> 01:13:57,392 The kids will never know, 1599 01:13:57,475 --> 01:14:00,061 because I'm too good of a dad to throw their stepfather under the bus. 1600 01:14:00,144 --> 01:14:01,813 But that's right where you're gonna be, Brad. 1601 01:14:01,896 --> 01:14:03,481 Under my bus. 1602 01:14:03,564 --> 01:14:06,526 Well, guess what, I'm gonna celebrate you morning, noon and night, 1603 01:14:06,651 --> 01:14:08,945 because it's the right thing to do in front of the kids. 1604 01:14:09,070 --> 01:14:11,114 But just know the way I really feel about you 1605 01:14:11,239 --> 01:14:13,074 is you can suck a fart, Dusty. 1606 01:14:13,324 --> 01:14:15,785 A wet, greasy fart. 1607 01:14:18,579 --> 01:14:21,457 You gonna keep pump-faking that thing or you gonna take a shot, Brad? 1608 01:14:21,624 --> 01:14:22,709 Huh? 1609 01:14:22,917 --> 01:14:26,087 What? What? Huh? 1610 01:14:26,254 --> 01:14:27,880 He's never played sports ever. 1611 01:14:28,006 --> 01:14:29,465 Maybe it's stuck to his hand. 1612 01:14:29,632 --> 01:14:30,800 Oh! Oh! 1613 01:14:32,051 --> 01:14:34,178 Huh? Huh? 1614 01:14:41,185 --> 01:14:42,270 That's what I thought. 1615 01:14:42,395 --> 01:14:44,022 You know what, Dusty, you're not worth it. 1616 01:14:44,105 --> 01:14:45,105 Come on, Dad. 1617 01:14:45,398 --> 01:14:46,482 Good. 1618 01:14:46,607 --> 01:14:48,109 Psych. You're totally worth it! 1619 01:14:49,610 --> 01:14:50,611 Dad! 1620 01:14:52,155 --> 01:14:54,782 - That was an ice ball. - Treating your dad like that! 1621 01:14:55,074 --> 01:14:56,075 Dad. 1622 01:14:56,451 --> 01:14:57,994 Look, it was an accident. 1623 01:15:01,497 --> 01:15:02,874 Go ahead, Roger. 1624 01:15:03,082 --> 01:15:04,500 Brad was right the first time. 1625 01:15:05,710 --> 01:15:06,753 You're not worth it. 1626 01:15:09,172 --> 01:15:11,090 Dang! Right down my neck! 1627 01:15:11,215 --> 01:15:12,592 Don! Sorry! Sorry! 1628 01:15:12,675 --> 01:15:15,803 That guy's like a snowball magnet. 1629 01:15:16,304 --> 01:15:18,181 You were right about everything. You happy now? 1630 01:15:18,723 --> 01:15:20,016 Ah, Dusty, 1631 01:15:21,059 --> 01:15:22,643 I do like being right. 1632 01:15:27,398 --> 01:15:29,817 - Hey, is that your baby in there? - Griffy! 1633 01:15:31,027 --> 01:15:33,863 I know. I know, sweetie. It's okay, it's okay. 1634 01:15:33,988 --> 01:15:35,615 I know, I know. 1635 01:15:35,740 --> 01:15:38,493 This was Dusty's idea. I never wanted to do this. 1636 01:16:16,489 --> 01:16:18,324 Hey, Brad. That one's mine. 1637 01:16:19,534 --> 01:16:21,369 - Oh, is this bag yours? - Yeah. 1638 01:16:27,625 --> 01:16:29,085 Sara? Sara! 1639 01:16:51,149 --> 01:16:52,650 - Oh, my gosh. - Ew. 1640 01:16:52,859 --> 01:16:54,569 What is going on here? 1641 01:16:59,073 --> 01:17:00,158 What's happening, Officer? 1642 01:17:00,241 --> 01:17:02,368 Avalanche hit the highway up ahead. 1643 01:17:02,577 --> 01:17:04,287 It's gonna take a few hours to clear it, 1644 01:17:04,370 --> 01:17:06,914 so follow the traffic back into town, all right? 1645 01:17:06,998 --> 01:17:09,375 What caused the avalanche? Was it all the snow? 1646 01:17:09,459 --> 01:17:12,795 Yeah, I'm pretty sure snow had something to do with the avalanche. 1647 01:17:12,962 --> 01:17:14,422 Keep it moving! 1648 01:17:19,010 --> 01:17:22,180 Well, I guess we could stop and have lunch to kill time. 1649 01:17:22,346 --> 01:17:23,723 On Christmas Day? 1650 01:17:24,432 --> 01:17:25,725 What's gonna be open? 1651 01:17:26,184 --> 01:17:27,226 I don't know. 1652 01:17:33,608 --> 01:17:35,359 Oh, look at that! 1653 01:17:35,943 --> 01:17:37,653 Looks like everyone had the same idea. 1654 01:17:50,833 --> 01:17:52,960 Oh, no. Everything's sold out. 1655 01:17:53,085 --> 01:17:55,588 Well, I guess we could see Missile Tow. What's that about? 1656 01:17:55,713 --> 01:17:56,839 It's Liam Neeson. 1657 01:17:57,048 --> 01:17:59,634 He's a tow truck driver who's on his way home for Christmas 1658 01:17:59,717 --> 01:18:02,345 with his kids and happens along some terrorists 1659 01:18:02,428 --> 01:18:04,138 who've hijacked a mobile ICBM. 1660 01:18:04,263 --> 01:18:07,225 He hooks it to his rig and has to get it to NORAD before Christmas morning. 1661 01:18:07,391 --> 01:18:08,809 I hear it's really good! 1662 01:18:08,935 --> 01:18:11,521 I don't know, Brad, it's PG-13. 1663 01:18:11,646 --> 01:18:14,482 I don't really care for the salty language. 1664 01:18:14,565 --> 01:18:16,817 It has cute little kids in it. I mean, how dirty can it be? 1665 01:18:16,984 --> 01:18:19,403 - Besides, you love Liam Neeson. - I do. 1666 01:18:19,487 --> 01:18:20,988 - Let's just give it a shot. - Yes! 1667 01:18:21,072 --> 01:18:22,240 Looks very heroic. 1668 01:18:22,406 --> 01:18:24,784 - I'll say that much. - I mean, really. Man! 1669 01:18:26,911 --> 01:18:29,330 The front row? I don't know, Brad. 1670 01:18:29,413 --> 01:18:30,873 - What about the… - Dad, please stop! 1671 01:18:30,998 --> 01:18:33,459 - It's gonna strain your eyes. - We don't have a choice, all right? 1672 01:18:35,294 --> 01:18:36,879 Look, it's Mom and Brad! 1673 01:18:39,632 --> 01:18:41,842 Santa's got a present for you bastards. 1674 01:18:50,977 --> 01:18:52,812 You're impounded, asshole. 1675 01:18:53,646 --> 01:18:56,023 - You did it, Daddy! - You killed them all. 1676 01:18:56,107 --> 01:18:58,818 No, kids. We did it. We killed them all. 1677 01:18:59,235 --> 01:19:00,403 Together. 1678 01:19:00,486 --> 01:19:01,904 We love you, Daddy. 1679 01:19:02,363 --> 01:19:04,115 I love you, too. 1680 01:19:04,490 --> 01:19:07,201 The only thing that matters to me in this crazy world 1681 01:19:07,743 --> 01:19:09,078 is you kids. 1682 01:19:09,954 --> 01:19:13,708 And I'm sorry that your holiday was ruined by those godless mother… 1683 01:19:20,881 --> 01:19:21,966 Sorry, folks. 1684 01:19:22,091 --> 01:19:23,968 Looks like we're having a bit of a power outage. 1685 01:19:24,093 --> 01:19:26,095 We don't know when the power's gonna come back on, 1686 01:19:26,220 --> 01:19:28,848 so you guys are all welcome to stay in here or in the lobby. 1687 01:19:28,931 --> 01:19:31,350 The DOT wants everybody to stay inside and off the roads, 1688 01:19:31,434 --> 01:19:33,227 so we might be in here for a while. 1689 01:19:35,646 --> 01:19:37,815 You know, I bet this is because of the snow, too. 1690 01:19:37,898 --> 01:19:39,400 Gee, Dad, you think so? 1691 01:20:05,843 --> 01:20:07,345 I need to use the gent's. 1692 01:20:07,470 --> 01:20:08,929 Brad, do you need to go tee-tee? 1693 01:20:09,055 --> 01:20:10,431 Dad, don't say that in public! 1694 01:20:10,514 --> 01:20:11,641 - Just go. - All right. 1695 01:20:14,268 --> 01:20:15,561 Is he still looking at me? 1696 01:20:17,104 --> 01:20:18,105 Yes. 1697 01:20:18,189 --> 01:20:20,483 Is he doing that one look that he does? You know, like… 1698 01:20:22,610 --> 01:20:24,403 - Is he doing that look? - Yeah. 1699 01:20:24,737 --> 01:20:26,906 Where he doesn't blink? Yeah. 1700 01:20:28,282 --> 01:20:29,283 Yep. 1701 01:20:30,201 --> 01:20:31,202 You know, 1702 01:20:31,494 --> 01:20:35,039 when I said that Brad was turning you into something that you're not? 1703 01:20:35,331 --> 01:20:39,293 Maybe, you know, what I really meant to say was that… 1704 01:20:40,252 --> 01:20:42,463 Brad's turning you into something that I'm not, 1705 01:20:43,130 --> 01:20:44,256 a good dad. 1706 01:20:46,008 --> 01:20:49,136 No? No, that didn't do it for you? C'mon. I thought it was pretty good. 1707 01:20:49,220 --> 01:20:50,971 That whole speech was in the movie we just saw. 1708 01:20:51,097 --> 01:20:52,473 - Was it? - Yeah. Word for word. 1709 01:20:52,556 --> 01:20:53,683 Dramatic pauses and all. 1710 01:20:53,808 --> 01:20:54,934 Liam Neeson just said that. 1711 01:20:55,184 --> 01:20:56,811 It must've been in my subconscious. 1712 01:20:57,478 --> 01:20:59,689 - I'm gonna go drain the lizard. - Yeah. Yeah. 1713 01:21:04,902 --> 01:21:08,114 Whoa! That is a very impressive watch. 1714 01:21:08,239 --> 01:21:10,491 Is that a Rolex? Mine's a Casio. 1715 01:21:11,117 --> 01:21:12,201 Yeah… 1716 01:21:19,834 --> 01:21:21,419 You know what, Kurt? 1717 01:21:21,794 --> 01:21:22,837 When we first met, 1718 01:21:23,003 --> 01:21:25,715 I was so excited about our being co-grandpas. 1719 01:21:25,965 --> 01:21:29,009 And now everybody's miserable! And my son won't forgive me. 1720 01:21:30,177 --> 01:21:31,846 You know what you and Brad really need? 1721 01:21:32,054 --> 01:21:34,014 Oh, no. 1722 01:21:34,432 --> 01:21:37,017 I'm not taking any advice from the likes of you. 1723 01:21:37,184 --> 01:21:38,269 No, thank you. 1724 01:21:42,106 --> 01:21:43,357 Okay, what do we need? 1725 01:21:46,694 --> 01:21:48,904 - Hey! Adrianna's here! - Megan! 1726 01:21:49,238 --> 01:21:50,238 Hi! 1727 01:21:50,281 --> 01:21:52,575 - I can't shake this guy. - I can't shake this guy. 1728 01:21:52,783 --> 01:21:54,577 - You guys got stuck here, too? - Yeah. 1729 01:21:54,660 --> 01:21:57,288 And, Dylan, look who else got stuck. Your girlfriend! 1730 01:21:57,830 --> 01:21:59,415 We should put her under the mistletoe. 1731 01:21:59,498 --> 01:22:00,498 Yeah! 1732 01:22:00,583 --> 01:22:02,334 - Come on, stay under it. - Stay. 1733 01:22:05,755 --> 01:22:07,339 You like that girl, don't you? 1734 01:22:10,009 --> 01:22:11,009 Well, 1735 01:22:11,135 --> 01:22:13,053 who knocked down a pin all by himself? 1736 01:22:14,388 --> 01:22:16,098 - I did? - Damn right, you did. 1737 01:22:16,348 --> 01:22:18,267 Now go in there and pick up that spare. 1738 01:22:18,350 --> 01:22:20,019 Here she is, Dylan! 1739 01:22:21,437 --> 01:22:22,938 It just doesn't seem right. 1740 01:22:25,608 --> 01:22:28,527 - Brad? - Dad, I really don't want to… 1741 01:22:29,111 --> 01:22:30,321 Jeez. 1742 01:22:30,446 --> 01:22:33,199 We're gonna settle this physically, like men! 1743 01:22:33,324 --> 01:22:35,618 And when it's all over, we're gonna feel a whole lot better. 1744 01:22:35,743 --> 01:22:37,453 At least somebody's taking my advice today. 1745 01:22:37,578 --> 01:22:39,413 Cut it out! This is child abuse! Honey, help me! 1746 01:22:39,497 --> 01:22:41,123 Don't be such a snowflake. Fight back! 1747 01:22:41,207 --> 01:22:43,334 Hey, guys, come on, knock it off. You're making a scene. 1748 01:22:43,417 --> 01:22:44,668 Yeah, Don, lean on him! 1749 01:22:44,752 --> 01:22:47,254 Engage me, son, for the sake of our male bond. 1750 01:22:49,590 --> 01:22:51,217 No, wait, wait, look. Look! 1751 01:22:55,888 --> 01:22:57,431 What's he doing? 1752 01:23:03,479 --> 01:23:05,314 Oh, my God. He's going in for his first kiss. 1753 01:23:05,439 --> 01:23:07,107 Look, she's standing under the mistletoe. 1754 01:23:07,191 --> 01:23:08,692 Oh, my God. Where's my phone? 1755 01:23:08,776 --> 01:23:10,277 Oh, my God, where's your phone? 1756 01:23:10,361 --> 01:23:11,695 Brad, where's your phone! 1757 01:23:11,779 --> 01:23:13,113 Okay, it's right here. Yeah. 1758 01:23:15,282 --> 01:23:17,576 Look how brave he is. She's all yours, buddy. 1759 01:23:18,285 --> 01:23:20,540 Unless she's got a boyfriend. In that case, there's the Friend Zone. 1760 01:23:20,623 --> 01:23:21,950 There's nothing wrong with the Friend Zone. 1761 01:23:22,050 --> 01:23:24,500 He's not going in the Friend Zone, okay? Look at that smile. She likes him. 1762 01:23:24,583 --> 01:23:25,793 Yeah, she wants a kiss. 1763 01:23:53,153 --> 01:23:54,822 My God, he kissed his sister! 1764 01:23:54,989 --> 01:23:56,365 Congratulations, you lucky gal. 1765 01:23:57,908 --> 01:24:00,369 I did it, El Padre! I kissed the girl I like! 1766 01:24:00,619 --> 01:24:03,372 Yeah! Attaboy! 1767 01:24:03,581 --> 01:24:06,834 Did you just kiss your sister? You sick kid! 1768 01:24:06,959 --> 01:24:07,960 Stepsister. 1769 01:24:08,127 --> 01:24:09,753 I mean, still not okay, I know that. 1770 01:24:09,837 --> 01:24:11,839 What? No, wait, he's just a little confused, all right? 1771 01:24:11,922 --> 01:24:13,767 It's no surprise when you look at who raised him. 1772 01:24:13,850 --> 01:24:15,342 Adrianna, come on. We're going home. 1773 01:24:15,467 --> 01:24:17,344 Wait, wait, Roger, you can't go out in that storm. 1774 01:24:17,428 --> 01:24:20,097 I was an alternate for Season 3 Ice Road Truckers. 1775 01:24:20,514 --> 01:24:21,514 I'll be fine. 1776 01:24:21,807 --> 01:24:24,059 Oh. That was their best season. 1777 01:24:24,894 --> 01:24:26,020 I got this. 1778 01:24:26,604 --> 01:24:28,147 Wait a minute. Roger, hold up, man. 1779 01:24:28,230 --> 01:24:30,816 No. From now on, I don't want you anywhere near my daughter. 1780 01:24:30,900 --> 01:24:32,735 I don't want anything to do with any of you! 1781 01:24:32,818 --> 01:24:34,987 Look, I never wanted to be family with you, either, Roger. 1782 01:24:35,070 --> 01:24:37,364 Just like Brad never wanted to be family with me. Did you, Brad? 1783 01:24:37,448 --> 01:24:39,325 No. Not at all. I hated your guts. 1784 01:24:39,408 --> 01:24:41,243 In fact, I still kind of do right now. 1785 01:24:41,368 --> 01:24:42,620 Yeah. Me, too, Brad. 1786 01:24:42,745 --> 01:24:44,371 But we're all connected by these kids. 1787 01:24:44,580 --> 01:24:45,956 No one's going anywhere. 1788 01:24:46,040 --> 01:24:47,875 - You gonna stop me? - If I have to, yes. 1789 01:24:47,958 --> 01:24:49,960 Yeah, right. You couldn't stop a clock, you weak tit. 1790 01:24:51,170 --> 01:24:52,379 The hammer. 1791 01:24:55,925 --> 01:24:57,009 You know what, Adrianna? 1792 01:24:57,509 --> 01:25:00,512 You're not gonna like this, young lady, but this is long overdue. 1793 01:25:04,308 --> 01:25:05,434 I love you. 1794 01:25:06,894 --> 01:25:08,687 - That got me. - Got me, too. Right here. 1795 01:25:08,771 --> 01:25:10,022 What the hell did you just say? 1796 01:25:10,105 --> 01:25:11,774 You heard me. I said, I love my stepdaughter! 1797 01:25:11,857 --> 01:25:14,026 And I meant it. I should've said it a long time ago, 1798 01:25:14,109 --> 01:25:17,279 but I was afraid to put myself out there and risk getting rejected. 1799 01:25:18,113 --> 01:25:19,156 - Aw. - Sweet. 1800 01:25:19,448 --> 01:25:20,491 You know what? 1801 01:25:21,450 --> 01:25:23,661 Adrianna, you're gonna spend Christmas with your mom, okay? 1802 01:25:26,205 --> 01:25:27,581 You're not leaving us, Roger. 1803 01:25:28,165 --> 01:25:29,458 'Cause I love you, too. 1804 01:25:31,961 --> 01:25:33,921 - You take that back! - Nope. I can't. 1805 01:25:34,004 --> 01:25:35,214 Can't take it back now. 1806 01:25:35,339 --> 01:25:37,007 Everybody heard it. It's out there. 1807 01:25:37,132 --> 01:25:39,802 - Everybody hear it? - Yeah. 1808 01:25:40,052 --> 01:25:41,887 You're her dad, you made her who she is, 1809 01:25:41,971 --> 01:25:44,848 and despite her currently harboring a fair amount of resentment towards me, 1810 01:25:44,932 --> 01:25:46,725 I love her, so that means I love you, too. 1811 01:25:47,059 --> 01:25:49,103 And I've never been too good about saying it, 1812 01:25:49,186 --> 01:25:50,604 but I'm gonna follow Brad's example, 1813 01:25:50,688 --> 01:25:51,688 who I also love. 1814 01:25:51,981 --> 01:25:53,941 Now you're just saying things to choke me up. 1815 01:25:54,024 --> 01:25:55,275 Brad! Cut it out. 1816 01:25:55,401 --> 01:25:57,486 - I'm trying. - I'm a hot mess here. 1817 01:25:57,569 --> 01:25:59,238 - Don, please! - You've got to understand, 1818 01:25:59,321 --> 01:26:00,990 when it comes out of nowhere like that, 1819 01:26:01,073 --> 01:26:02,074 what do you expect? 1820 01:26:02,199 --> 01:26:03,492 - Stop! - I'm stopping. 1821 01:26:03,575 --> 01:26:04,576 We're currently stopping. 1822 01:26:04,827 --> 01:26:06,954 Yeah, guys. Cut it out, you're embarrassing me. 1823 01:26:07,079 --> 01:26:08,122 I love you, Brad. 1824 01:26:08,664 --> 01:26:10,290 And I love Karen, I love Sara, 1825 01:26:11,250 --> 01:26:12,292 and I love my kids. 1826 01:26:15,963 --> 01:26:17,047 I… 1827 01:26:20,759 --> 01:26:22,594 I might need a little more time with that one. 1828 01:26:22,678 --> 01:26:23,664 Sure, understood. 1829 01:26:23,679 --> 01:26:25,431 But we're making progress. Maybe for your birthday. 1830 01:26:25,514 --> 01:26:26,500 Yeah. 1831 01:26:26,515 --> 01:26:28,267 You know, unless you want to say anything? 1832 01:26:28,475 --> 01:26:30,185 - Anything at all? - Say it, Kurt. 1833 01:26:30,269 --> 01:26:32,146 - Now's the time. - Just say it, Kurt. 1834 01:26:32,271 --> 01:26:33,439 You wanna say anything? 1835 01:26:33,522 --> 01:26:35,232 - It's not that bad. - Just say it. 1836 01:26:35,357 --> 01:26:36,483 - You can do it. - Do it. 1837 01:26:37,776 --> 01:26:39,987 Nah, the birthday's a good target. Good target. 1838 01:26:41,030 --> 01:26:42,656 All right, Roger, what do you say? 1839 01:26:43,115 --> 01:26:45,284 It's not too late to spend Christmas with your family. 1840 01:27:19,276 --> 01:27:21,028 Damn, that's my favorite song of all time. 1841 01:27:44,593 --> 01:27:46,386 I'll play this in August, I don't even care. 1842 01:28:26,760 --> 01:28:28,679 Yes! Fantastic! 1843 01:28:33,600 --> 01:28:35,018 - He heard it! - Good. 1844 01:28:44,945 --> 01:28:46,071 Come on, Roger. 1845 01:28:47,656 --> 01:28:49,700 Look. Yes, we're all stuck here, 1846 01:28:49,992 --> 01:28:51,660 but we're with our loved ones. 1847 01:28:51,743 --> 01:28:53,829 I'm not. I came alone. 1848 01:28:54,079 --> 01:28:55,247 Okay, well, 1849 01:28:55,581 --> 01:28:58,041 he came to the movies alone on Christmas, and that's a little sad. 1850 01:29:01,461 --> 01:29:03,088 But you're not alone, sir. 1851 01:29:03,255 --> 01:29:05,924 I mean, think about it. We come to the movies all the time. 1852 01:29:06,133 --> 01:29:07,926 We sit with hundreds of people. 1853 01:29:08,135 --> 01:29:11,471 And we laugh together, we cry together, 1854 01:29:11,805 --> 01:29:14,016 but we never look at each other, do we? 1855 01:29:14,224 --> 01:29:17,102 Brad, it's not a microphone, it's a mallet. See? 1856 01:29:17,186 --> 01:29:19,146 - They can hear you. - You can still hear me, right? 1857 01:29:19,229 --> 01:29:20,397 - Yeah. - Yeah. 1858 01:29:20,647 --> 01:29:22,107 Take a look at each other. 1859 01:29:22,566 --> 01:29:23,901 - That's right. - Hi. 1860 01:29:24,401 --> 01:29:26,945 Give a hug. Give an embrace. 1861 01:29:27,404 --> 01:29:30,991 What we have here are the makings of a really great Christmas party. 1862 01:29:31,116 --> 01:29:32,743 We have a Christmas tree. 1863 01:29:32,868 --> 01:29:34,870 We have music and snacks. 1864 01:29:34,995 --> 01:29:36,705 We have Christmas spirit. 1865 01:29:36,914 --> 01:29:37,956 We have mirth. 1866 01:29:38,123 --> 01:29:39,208 We have snow! 1867 01:29:39,666 --> 01:29:41,501 You know who doesn't have snow? 1868 01:29:41,668 --> 01:29:43,837 I'll bet he knows who doesn't have snow, don't you? 1869 01:29:46,465 --> 01:29:48,675 Yeah. Yeah, I know. 1870 01:29:49,635 --> 01:29:51,261 I know where there isn't snow. 1871 01:30:08,737 --> 01:30:10,197 Merry Christmas! 1872 01:30:10,322 --> 01:30:11,740 Merry Christmas, folks! 1873 01:30:23,752 --> 01:30:24,920 What? 1874 01:30:28,632 --> 01:30:29,967 "Sara. 1875 01:30:30,550 --> 01:30:31,885 Beautiful and smart. 1876 01:30:32,552 --> 01:30:34,596 The mom that everyone loves"? 1877 01:30:35,514 --> 01:30:38,183 Oh, my God. She's basing a character on me! 1878 01:31:15,220 --> 01:31:17,674 All right, guys. We're not gonna see them again till Easter, 1879 01:31:17,774 --> 01:31:19,433 so everybody say good-bye to El Padre and Pop-Pop. 1880 01:31:19,516 --> 01:31:20,976 - Bye, Dylan. - Good-bye, El Padre! 1881 01:31:21,101 --> 01:31:22,936 Hey, next time you want to shoot a guy, 1882 01:31:23,020 --> 01:31:25,272 don't just wing him, go for center mass, okay? 1883 01:31:25,605 --> 01:31:26,606 Good-bye, Adrianna. 1884 01:31:28,984 --> 01:31:30,944 I don't want you to go, Pop-Pop! 1885 01:31:31,028 --> 01:31:32,237 - Really? - Yeah, really? 1886 01:31:32,321 --> 01:31:33,697 Sure. Of course, he gets a hug. 1887 01:31:33,780 --> 01:31:36,533 Maybe you can call me and tell me more Pop-Pop stories. 1888 01:31:36,658 --> 01:31:37,701 I would love to! 1889 01:31:37,784 --> 01:31:40,746 Oh. And I also signed you up for SeniorMatch.com. 1890 01:31:40,829 --> 01:31:42,914 It's a dating website for old people like you. 1891 01:31:43,081 --> 01:31:44,458 Thank you, sweetie. 1892 01:31:45,375 --> 01:31:47,002 Honey, it's your mom texting. 1893 01:31:47,336 --> 01:31:48,962 They're just getting off the plane. 1894 01:31:49,046 --> 01:31:50,547 I'd better go before they get here. 1895 01:31:50,630 --> 01:31:52,382 I don't want to make anything awkward. 1896 01:31:52,632 --> 01:31:54,176 - Bye, Dad. - Bye, big man. 1897 01:31:54,801 --> 01:31:57,220 - Love you. - I love you, too, Brad. 1898 01:31:58,597 --> 01:32:00,557 Hey, well, yeah, you have a good flight. 1899 01:32:14,279 --> 01:32:15,989 Yeah, let's not get that going. 1900 01:32:16,073 --> 01:32:18,575 I agree. You've got to start that younger. We missed that window. 1901 01:32:18,700 --> 01:32:20,994 - I really appreciate the gesture. - You do? Oh, good. 1902 01:32:21,119 --> 01:32:23,038 - Hey. I'll see you, kid. - See you soon, yeah. 1903 01:32:23,121 --> 01:32:24,456 Yeah, bye, kid. 1904 01:32:24,623 --> 01:32:26,875 - Are you coming, Pop-Pop? - Come on, Captain! 1905 01:32:27,751 --> 01:32:28,752 Bye, Dad. 1906 01:32:29,836 --> 01:32:31,588 You know, Don, I've been thinking. 1907 01:32:31,713 --> 01:32:32,923 You don't need a dating app. 1908 01:32:33,215 --> 01:32:35,008 What you need is a wing-man. 1909 01:32:35,467 --> 01:32:36,927 I switched our flights to Vegas. 1910 01:32:37,010 --> 01:32:39,304 New Year's at Caesar's, fix you right up. 1911 01:32:39,388 --> 01:32:40,680 That sounds wonderful! 1912 01:32:41,390 --> 01:32:43,058 Where are we connecting through? 1913 01:32:43,308 --> 01:32:45,310 Don't start with me, Pop-Pop. 1914 01:32:45,394 --> 01:32:47,312 Hey, Braddie. Don't be nervous now. 1915 01:32:47,646 --> 01:32:51,316 You are the kindest, most gentle and honest guy I know. 1916 01:32:51,858 --> 01:32:54,111 And whoever your mother brings down that escalator, 1917 01:32:54,194 --> 01:32:55,570 he's gonna love you, you hear me? 1918 01:32:55,654 --> 01:32:56,738 Grandma! 1919 01:33:00,992 --> 01:33:02,202 Is that Sully? 1920 01:33:03,203 --> 01:33:04,371 Wait, wait, who? 1921 01:33:04,621 --> 01:33:06,123 Sully Sullenberger. 1922 01:33:06,206 --> 01:33:08,959 The guy who saved 155 passengers on the miracle on the Hudson! 1923 01:33:09,084 --> 01:33:10,669 Clint Eastwood made a frickin' movie about it. 1924 01:33:10,752 --> 01:33:12,504 We watched it at your house, it was awesome! 1925 01:33:12,587 --> 01:33:14,965 Right. Tom Hanks and Aaron Eckhart. I really enjoyed it. 1926 01:33:15,215 --> 01:33:17,676 That guy is a national hero, and he's gonna be your stepdad. 1927 01:33:18,427 --> 01:33:19,511 Wow. Amazing. 1928 01:33:19,594 --> 01:33:21,596 I bet you he gets free flight vouchers. 1929 01:33:21,721 --> 01:33:23,181 And maybe get us some vouchers! 1930 01:33:23,348 --> 01:33:24,349 Maybe. 1931 01:33:24,433 --> 01:33:26,977 Well, don't make him wait. Go say hi. Go! Go! 1932 01:33:27,227 --> 01:33:28,228 Grandma! 1933 01:33:29,813 --> 01:33:31,815 You must be Brad. 1934 01:33:32,065 --> 01:33:33,051 Nope. 1935 01:33:33,066 --> 01:33:34,901 - No, Brad. - You're not my dad! 1936 01:33:34,985 --> 01:33:36,111 Brad, no, that's a mistake! 1937 01:33:36,278 --> 01:33:38,196 I don't care how many lives you saved! 1938 01:33:38,363 --> 01:33:40,740 You'll never replace him, do you hear me? 1939 01:33:42,951 --> 01:33:44,786 Brad, he's so nice! Come back! 1940 01:33:44,953 --> 01:33:48,498 You only have one good story, my father has a million! 1941 01:35:28,306 --> 01:35:30,141 You're listening to Jason Sinclair at the Panda, 1942 01:35:30,225 --> 01:35:32,602 and I've got a little holiday recipe for you tonight. 1943 01:35:32,769 --> 01:35:35,730 Two cups of eggnog, one serving of silk pajamas, 1944 01:35:35,897 --> 01:35:38,358 and a heaping helping of a loved one. 1945 01:35:38,483 --> 01:35:40,777 And I'm gonna add a pinch of smooth jazz 1946 01:35:40,944 --> 01:35:42,153 on the Panda. 1947 01:35:42,904 --> 01:35:44,322 And I have one question for you. 1948 01:35:44,489 --> 01:35:45,782 Do you know what time it is? 1949 01:39:08,359 --> 01:39:10,528 You know. Last year, the folks at St. Benedict's, they… 1950 01:39:10,612 --> 01:39:12,864 They had a… A modern-dress Nativity. 1951 01:39:12,947 --> 01:39:16,242 Everybody hated it at first, but you know the folks at St. Benedict's, 1952 01:39:16,367 --> 01:39:17,952 they got back at 'em, all right. 1953 01:39:18,077 --> 01:39:20,079 They won the prize for "Most Original." 1954 01:39:20,872 --> 01:39:24,250 Then, of course, you have the Maplewood Christians. 1955 01:39:24,417 --> 01:39:28,296 They had a kind of friendly competition with the Nazarenes, 1956 01:39:29,339 --> 01:39:32,592 and took all their hay last year. 1957 01:39:33,176 --> 01:39:35,094 Yeah, you just try setting up 1958 01:39:36,262 --> 01:39:37,972 a Nativity without hay. 1959 01:39:38,264 --> 01:39:39,766 Merry Christmas, fellas!