1 00:01:48,520 --> 00:01:52,080 What does the word 'home'mean to you? 2 00:01:54,920 --> 00:01:57,400 Home? 3 00:01:59,440 --> 00:02:04,040 It's some place safe. 4 00:02:08,560 --> 00:02:10,680 Somewhere... 5 00:02:12,600 --> 00:02:17,400 You know you can stay, and you don't have to move on. 6 00:02:18,880 --> 00:02:22,520 It's not some place temporary. 7 00:02:53,560 --> 00:02:57,080 Scoot up a bit, just a little. 8 00:02:58,440 --> 00:03:02,160 A bit down again. Like that. Perfect. 9 00:03:02,280 --> 00:03:05,000 I also have to do this. 10 00:03:08,160 --> 00:03:11,880 - So if you close your eyes... - Yes. 11 00:03:12,000 --> 00:03:16,920 And try to take a deep breath. Just relax completely. 12 00:03:26,840 --> 00:03:29,920 Have you ever told your story before? 13 00:03:33,440 --> 00:03:37,200 But you're okay with telling me? 14 00:03:37,320 --> 00:03:39,360 Yes. 15 00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:42,800 Then I think that... 16 00:03:42,920 --> 00:03:47,520 You don't have to tell me yet. Just think back to your earliest memory. 17 00:03:47,640 --> 00:03:50,920 What's the earliest thing you remember? 18 00:04:08,040 --> 00:04:10,960 I'm three or four years old. 19 00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:16,400 Hey! Watch out! 20 00:04:17,520 --> 00:04:21,720 - Where are you? - We're in Afghanistan, in Kabul. 21 00:04:43,080 --> 00:04:46,080 Can you describe yourself? 22 00:04:46,200 --> 00:04:49,600 I think I always had a tendency... 23 00:04:49,720 --> 00:04:54,840 To be a little different. Let's just put it like that. 24 00:04:58,720 --> 00:05:02,040 I wasn't afraid of wearing my sister's dresses... 25 00:05:02,160 --> 00:05:04,880 My youngest sister's nightie. 26 00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:07,320 I liked the attention. 27 00:05:20,440 --> 00:05:23,520 Where are you in Kabul? 28 00:05:24,520 --> 00:05:27,840 In the house where I was born. 29 00:05:33,080 --> 00:05:38,800 - Where are your parents? - My mum is inside. 30 00:05:38,920 --> 00:05:41,480 I just know she is. 31 00:05:48,720 --> 00:05:52,920 There you go, sweetie. That should do the trick. 32 00:05:53,040 --> 00:05:57,720 At night, I put my head on her lap, and she strokes my hair. 33 00:05:57,840 --> 00:06:00,200 No one can do it like her. 34 00:06:01,760 --> 00:06:03,240 When I look at my mother, 35 00:06:03,360 --> 00:06:07,480 I wish I could see what she looked like when she was young. 36 00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:11,320 I've seen photos of her with dark black hair, 37 00:06:11,440 --> 00:06:15,640 but I only remember her with grey. 38 00:06:15,760 --> 00:06:20,280 Go back and play. Dinner will be ready in an hour. 39 00:06:28,000 --> 00:06:32,400 Dad took me by the hand, and we walked the airstrip together. 40 00:06:32,520 --> 00:06:35,280 He lifted me up and put me in the cockpit. 41 00:06:35,400 --> 00:06:37,240 It didn't have a steering wheel. 42 00:06:37,360 --> 00:06:40,560 It was like a joystick, with buttons everywhere. 43 00:06:40,680 --> 00:06:43,640 My sister is telling us stories about my father. 44 00:06:43,760 --> 00:06:47,120 And then we took off! He said: 45 00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:51,320 "It's important that you don't touch any buttons." 46 00:06:51,440 --> 00:06:56,040 "If you hit the wrong one, it'll go kaboom!" 47 00:06:56,160 --> 00:06:59,480 Then we flew off, into the clouds... 48 00:06:59,600 --> 00:07:03,080 And we could see to the end of the world! 49 00:07:03,200 --> 00:07:05,680 It was amazing! 50 00:07:07,840 --> 00:07:12,280 Lots of it is true, but she makes a lot up too. 51 00:07:12,400 --> 00:07:17,640 My brother and I are completely in awe of what she is telling us. 52 00:07:17,760 --> 00:07:22,560 He said that as long as he was there, nothing would ever happen to me. 53 00:07:22,680 --> 00:07:26,520 I remember feeling jealous. 54 00:07:26,640 --> 00:07:29,080 Why were you jealous? 55 00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:33,280 Because she is telling us about all these great things 56 00:07:33,400 --> 00:07:36,920 that my brother and I never got to experience... 57 00:07:37,040 --> 00:07:39,800 Being together with our father. 58 00:07:39,920 --> 00:07:43,880 Where is your father? 59 00:07:46,720 --> 00:07:50,840 - Could we take a short break? - Yes, of course. 60 00:07:52,560 --> 00:07:58,480 Some things are hard to talk about. It's still tough, 61 00:07:58,600 --> 00:08:02,080 but I need to come to terms with them. 62 00:08:02,200 --> 00:08:06,440 It's my past, I can't run away from it, and I don't want to. 63 00:08:06,560 --> 00:08:12,680 I might be ready in half a year, a year. 64 00:08:12,800 --> 00:08:16,840 Of course. We'll take it at your pace. 65 00:08:16,960 --> 00:08:21,040 I'm just glad that you are finally ready to tell your story. 66 00:08:22,400 --> 00:08:27,160 I remember back in high school, I had no clue. 67 00:08:27,280 --> 00:08:29,720 There were so many stories going around, like: 68 00:08:29,840 --> 00:08:34,240 "Did you hear he walked all the way from Afghanistan?" 69 00:08:34,360 --> 00:08:37,960 - Good one! - I didn't know what to believe. 70 00:08:38,080 --> 00:08:40,320 There were stories like that. 71 00:08:40,440 --> 00:08:42,360 Wow! 72 00:08:44,280 --> 00:08:46,960 I remember the first time I saw you. 73 00:08:47,080 --> 00:08:50,040 There weren't a lot immigrants back then. 74 00:08:50,160 --> 00:08:55,400 You were wearing a black and white chequered t-shirt. Remember? 75 00:08:55,520 --> 00:08:58,160 Yes, I do. 76 00:08:58,280 --> 00:09:00,720 - And buffalo shoes. - That's me. 77 00:09:00,840 --> 00:09:03,040 - I thought, "he's cool." - Fearless. 78 00:09:03,160 --> 00:09:09,720 You kept staring straight ahead, like you were trying not to attract attention. 79 00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:11,920 I don't think you noticed me. 80 00:09:12,040 --> 00:09:16,400 I was surprised we got off at the same stop. 81 00:09:21,520 --> 00:09:28,000 - Look, I think it's from our junior year? - Yes, it's junior prom. 82 00:09:28,120 --> 00:09:33,640 Check out those fancy shoes! Everything was tip top. 83 00:09:39,080 --> 00:09:40,440 Here it is. 84 00:09:41,880 --> 00:09:46,600 This is where my story begins. 85 00:09:47,880 --> 00:09:52,240 I wrote it all down, when I got to Denmark. 86 00:09:52,360 --> 00:09:54,960 Can you try to read it? 87 00:09:55,080 --> 00:10:02,000 It'll be hard. I'm not that good at reading dari anymore. 88 00:10:11,920 --> 00:10:15,440 I can't even read my own handwriting. 89 00:10:18,280 --> 00:10:22,200 After the mujahideen... 90 00:10:23,320 --> 00:10:27,480 The mujahideen seized power in Afghanistan... 91 00:10:33,360 --> 00:10:38,480 They killed my father, kidnapped my sister, and killed my mother and brother. 92 00:10:38,600 --> 00:10:46,480 If I had stayed, they would likely have killed me too. 93 00:10:49,680 --> 00:10:52,680 It was pretty intense. 94 00:10:55,360 --> 00:11:00,160 Have you told Kasper any of these stories? 95 00:11:08,040 --> 00:11:12,240 Kasper, I'm going to start filming. 96 00:11:16,520 --> 00:11:18,640 See if it needs more salt. 97 00:11:18,760 --> 00:11:21,480 When are you getting married? 98 00:11:23,120 --> 00:11:26,200 When we find a place to live. 99 00:11:26,320 --> 00:11:29,560 First of all, I want you to come home. 100 00:11:29,680 --> 00:11:32,960 Secondly, I want a place where we can have a party. 101 00:11:33,080 --> 00:11:39,000 If we need to wait till we can have a party, it'll take a while. 102 00:11:39,880 --> 00:11:44,440 Maybe I'll just go buy us a house while you're away. 103 00:11:44,560 --> 00:11:48,480 You'll just have to deal with it then. 104 00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:59,040 - When do you leave tomorrow? - I have to be at the airport at 10. 105 00:11:59,160 --> 00:12:04,840 - How long this time? - Till June. 106 00:12:04,960 --> 00:12:07,760 I'll be back for a few months and then leave again. 107 00:12:07,880 --> 00:12:11,880 - You leave again? - I think so. 108 00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:14,240 Kasper has no idea. 109 00:12:16,200 --> 00:12:19,800 - Where are you going? - Back to the us. 110 00:12:19,920 --> 00:12:23,720 Did you get an email from your professor at Princeton? 111 00:12:23,840 --> 00:12:28,960 No, a letter. He wants me to do a post-doc. 112 00:12:29,840 --> 00:12:33,480 - To continue your research? - Yes. 113 00:12:33,600 --> 00:12:36,880 What does Kasper say about that? 114 00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:42,760 We haven't really talked about it. 115 00:12:52,200 --> 00:12:57,400 Last time we spoke, we talked about your father. 116 00:12:57,520 --> 00:13:00,600 Are you up to talking more about that? 117 00:13:00,720 --> 00:13:03,400 Yes, it's just sad. 118 00:13:03,520 --> 00:13:07,280 If we're back in Kabul during your childhood, 119 00:13:07,400 --> 00:13:09,680 where is your father? 120 00:13:17,080 --> 00:13:19,480 We don't know. 121 00:13:19,600 --> 00:13:25,040 - He was taken away. - Why? 122 00:13:28,760 --> 00:13:33,800 Arise, you victims of oppression! 123 00:13:33,920 --> 00:13:37,960 Arise, you prisoners of want! 124 00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:44,520 Because the Afghan government saw him as a threat 125 00:13:44,640 --> 00:13:47,240 to communist rule, 126 00:13:47,360 --> 00:13:52,920 after they overthrew the monarchy in the late '70s... 127 00:13:53,040 --> 00:13:55,520 In 1979. 128 00:14:02,200 --> 00:14:09,000 They rounded up about 3,000 people, including my father. 129 00:14:09,920 --> 00:14:14,720 My mother told me about the day he was picked up. 130 00:14:14,840 --> 00:14:17,840 She said that he expected it. 131 00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:21,560 - Akhtar nawabi? - Yes? 132 00:14:21,680 --> 00:14:24,240 We have orders to bring you in. 133 00:14:25,200 --> 00:14:28,800 Wait here. I'll get my coat. 134 00:14:28,920 --> 00:14:31,040 Okay, but hurry up! 135 00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:35,560 They've come for me. 136 00:14:38,240 --> 00:14:40,960 You should keep this... 137 00:14:44,040 --> 00:14:46,360 Just in case. 138 00:14:47,960 --> 00:14:51,800 I'm not a threat to anyone. I'll be back soon. 139 00:14:54,480 --> 00:14:57,720 Then he was put in jail. 140 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:04,680 My mum told me that the family was able to visit him quite often, 141 00:15:04,800 --> 00:15:08,040 but three months later, he disappeared... 142 00:15:09,280 --> 00:15:11,320 Just like that. 143 00:15:36,160 --> 00:15:41,800 Amin, listen. You need to keep it high and make sure the string is taut. 144 00:15:41,920 --> 00:15:46,320 I spend a lot of time with my brother. 145 00:15:46,440 --> 00:15:52,080 He's a real boy, the kind who gets his hands dirty. He breeds pigeons on our roof. 146 00:15:53,440 --> 00:15:57,920 Hold it tight! Be careful, amin! Give it to me! Give it to me! 147 00:16:00,480 --> 00:16:02,600 Sorry. 148 00:16:05,800 --> 00:16:10,280 - I have 69 cards. How many do you have? - 52. 149 00:16:10,400 --> 00:16:14,760 How about I trade you vivek mushran for anil kapoor? 150 00:16:15,560 --> 00:16:17,880 - No. - Please, sabia. 151 00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:23,640 - I said no. I'm not interested. - But you have two anil kapoors! 152 00:16:23,760 --> 00:16:27,040 I'll give you vivek mushran and mamik Singh for him. 153 00:16:27,160 --> 00:16:31,320 I don't need either of them, and it's always nice to have a spare anil. 154 00:16:31,440 --> 00:16:34,920 Look at him! He's so handsome. 155 00:16:36,000 --> 00:16:38,440 Ugh! You really piss me off! 156 00:16:38,560 --> 00:16:42,520 - How do you want it? - I don't care. 157 00:16:42,640 --> 00:16:46,360 Actually, I'm not in the mood for this. 158 00:17:07,080 --> 00:17:10,200 When did you first realize that you were gay? 159 00:17:10,320 --> 00:17:13,120 I wasn't very old. 160 00:17:13,240 --> 00:17:19,360 I think I've had fantasies about men ever since I was five or six years old. 161 00:17:19,480 --> 00:17:23,040 I remember one of them very clearly. 162 00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:28,200 I was enamoured with Jean-Claude Van damme. 163 00:17:30,160 --> 00:17:32,640 Seriously. I fantasized about him. 164 00:17:32,760 --> 00:17:37,400 I also liked Jean-Claude Van damme, but for different reasons. 165 00:17:38,920 --> 00:17:43,920 Yeah, I'm pretty sure the way I "liked" him was different. 166 00:17:46,240 --> 00:17:48,720 Yeah, well, I... 167 00:17:48,840 --> 00:17:55,280 I kind of knew all along that I was into men, 168 00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:58,960 without actually knowing what it meant. 169 00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:06,040 In Afghanistan, homosexuals didn't exist. 170 00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:10,040 There wasn't even a word for them. 171 00:18:10,160 --> 00:18:16,000 They brought shame on the family, 172 00:18:16,120 --> 00:18:19,920 so it was hard to accept being gay. 173 00:18:37,880 --> 00:18:39,520 We play volleyball every day. 174 00:18:39,640 --> 00:18:41,000 Come on! 175 00:18:41,120 --> 00:18:45,360 My brother and I we're quite the team. 176 00:18:45,480 --> 00:18:50,120 My brother is very tall and great at spiking. 177 00:18:51,440 --> 00:18:53,600 Focus! 178 00:18:58,800 --> 00:19:02,840 These days, terrorists are receiving 179 00:19:02,960 --> 00:19:10,920 brand-new, long-range missiles from the us government. 180 00:19:11,040 --> 00:19:16,480 The us wants a Vietnam war for the ussr in Afghanistan, but I'm telling you 181 00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:24,120 that when the us supplies the terrorists with aid 182 00:19:24,240 --> 00:19:26,240 to destroy Afghanistan, 183 00:19:26,360 --> 00:19:30,720 Afghanistan could well become a second Vietnam for the us instead! 184 00:19:31,360 --> 00:19:37,360 The civil war began when my father was taken away. They fought the mujahideen. 185 00:19:37,480 --> 00:19:41,760 The war isn't fought in Kabul proper, 186 00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:46,200 so we don't notice it too much. 187 00:19:47,560 --> 00:19:51,920 The only reason I notice it is because of my brother. 188 00:19:52,040 --> 00:19:54,480 He's a growing teenage boy. 189 00:19:54,600 --> 00:19:59,000 He doesn't want to join the army, but he has to. 190 00:20:11,920 --> 00:20:13,160 Saif! 191 00:20:15,400 --> 00:20:18,640 - The police are coming! - Stop! 192 00:20:18,760 --> 00:20:20,560 Run! 193 00:20:32,720 --> 00:20:34,080 Saif! 194 00:20:44,520 --> 00:20:46,040 Saif! 195 00:20:49,960 --> 00:20:51,280 Saif! 196 00:20:55,440 --> 00:20:59,560 Mum, they're here. They caught him! 197 00:21:01,240 --> 00:21:07,480 You can't stay here. You need to hide. Run over to uncle mahdi! Go! 198 00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:11,840 Come back when it's dark. Be careful! 199 00:21:12,560 --> 00:21:18,320 My brother is always on the run. He isn't the only one either. 200 00:21:18,440 --> 00:21:22,080 Thousands of Afghan boys don't want to go to war, 201 00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:26,800 and with good reason. Most of them don't return. 202 00:21:26,920 --> 00:21:28,800 They die. 203 00:21:29,520 --> 00:21:35,360 Oh my country, you suffer, because you were betrayed. 204 00:21:35,480 --> 00:21:41,880 Oh my country, you've lost your melody, your voice. 205 00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:47,120 Oh my country, you are in pain, and there is no cure. 206 00:21:47,240 --> 00:21:50,320 Oh my country... 207 00:21:50,440 --> 00:21:55,000 Mujahedeen attacks are on the rise in Kabul after the Soviet withdrawal. 208 00:21:55,120 --> 00:21:58,080 Yesterday, seven people were killed near Kabul airport. 209 00:22:40,800 --> 00:22:45,400 We know the Afghan army isn't strong enough to fend off the Taliban, 210 00:22:45,520 --> 00:22:49,600 so it's just a matter of time before they invade Kabul. 211 00:22:49,720 --> 00:22:57,240 We know they will seek revenge against people they consider "non-believers." 212 00:22:59,800 --> 00:23:01,080 Amin! 213 00:23:01,200 --> 00:23:04,000 We need to get out right away. 214 00:23:04,120 --> 00:23:08,160 We pack a few things, but we don't have time to sell anything. 215 00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:23,480 Amin, come on. 216 00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:38,040 - So you barely made it out? - Yes, at the very last minute. 217 00:24:17,520 --> 00:24:22,760 I cry all the way to the airport and then, on the plane. 218 00:24:24,000 --> 00:24:25,600 Yeah... 219 00:25:28,560 --> 00:25:30,960 We fled to Moscow. 220 00:25:32,720 --> 00:25:37,040 Russia was the only country that would Grant us a tourist visa. 221 00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:43,240 Russia was such a strange place to be at the time. 222 00:25:46,600 --> 00:25:49,960 We arrive a year after the fall of communism. 223 00:25:54,720 --> 00:25:58,400 People are starving, and the supermarkets are empty. 224 00:25:58,520 --> 00:26:05,480 The ruble keeps devaluating, and they keep printing new notes. 225 00:26:07,840 --> 00:26:13,200 There's a lot of crime, and you can't trust the police. 226 00:26:35,600 --> 00:26:38,680 - Finally! - Abbas! My son! 227 00:26:38,800 --> 00:26:43,920 My big brother, who lives in Sweden, meets us in Moscow when we arrive. 228 00:26:45,040 --> 00:26:47,920 He rented an apartment for us. 229 00:26:48,040 --> 00:26:50,680 Oh, my god! You've grown! 230 00:26:52,920 --> 00:26:58,200 He fled in the '80s, because he didn't want to go to war. 231 00:27:05,840 --> 00:27:07,880 Go back! 232 00:27:12,760 --> 00:27:14,680 Wow! 233 00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:19,320 We need to get them to Sweden as quickly as possible, 234 00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:23,560 so that they can start school. If we wait, they'll be too old. 235 00:27:23,680 --> 00:27:27,040 I know. What about you, sweetheart? Is Sweden treating you well? 236 00:27:27,160 --> 00:27:31,280 Cleaning doesn't pay well, but it's all right. 237 00:27:33,200 --> 00:27:39,160 $4,600 dollars is all I could put together. I'll get you more when I can. 238 00:27:39,280 --> 00:27:40,560 Thank you. 239 00:27:41,240 --> 00:27:46,280 - When do you have to go back? - Tomorrow. I only have two days off. 240 00:27:51,640 --> 00:27:53,640 Come here, you two! 241 00:27:57,000 --> 00:28:02,000 I bet it's boring hanging out with mum and our sisters all the time. 242 00:28:02,120 --> 00:28:05,720 I'll make real men out of you, when you get to Sweden. 243 00:28:05,840 --> 00:28:10,400 Just you wait! The girls in Sweden are beautiful! 244 00:28:15,720 --> 00:28:20,200 - What's the plan? - Getting out of Russia. 245 00:28:20,320 --> 00:28:26,280 It costs a lot of money to get smuggled to Sweden. 246 00:28:27,320 --> 00:28:28,840 By traffickers? 247 00:28:28,960 --> 00:28:33,200 Yes, human traffickers. It's the cheapest way. 248 00:28:34,200 --> 00:28:39,200 You can get to Sweden for $3,000. 249 00:28:39,320 --> 00:28:42,400 It's $15-20,000 for all of us. 250 00:28:43,680 --> 00:28:47,040 My big brother is under enormous pressure because of it. 251 00:28:47,160 --> 00:28:50,040 He doesn't make a lot of money. 252 00:28:53,440 --> 00:28:55,880 Stop! Papers, please! 253 00:28:57,840 --> 00:28:59,640 Papers! 254 00:29:00,520 --> 00:29:02,640 Stay there. 255 00:29:11,760 --> 00:29:15,160 Your visa is expired. 256 00:29:25,120 --> 00:29:27,520 Thank you. 257 00:29:27,640 --> 00:29:29,600 Go on. 258 00:29:31,880 --> 00:29:34,000 Beat it! 259 00:29:37,640 --> 00:29:40,840 We couldn't move about the city freely, 260 00:29:40,960 --> 00:29:44,680 because we didn't have the right papers, 261 00:29:44,800 --> 00:29:47,480 so we stayed in Russia illegally. 262 00:29:50,480 --> 00:29:54,840 I ran away from the police whenever I saw them on the street. 263 00:30:03,640 --> 00:30:09,240 So, I'd sit at home all day, watching Mexican soap operas. 264 00:30:09,360 --> 00:30:12,360 The whole family did. It was the highlight of our day. 265 00:30:12,480 --> 00:30:15,760 - Let me help you with that suitcase. - Oh, thank you! 266 00:30:15,880 --> 00:30:21,040 - Is this your first time in Mexico City? - Yes! I've never seen anything like it. 267 00:30:22,120 --> 00:30:25,400 And so we sit there for a year. 268 00:30:25,520 --> 00:30:29,000 We just sit there, waiting to leave. 269 00:30:30,960 --> 00:30:35,640 It's really hard for my brother to put together all that money. 270 00:30:35,760 --> 00:30:41,160 Then, there is only enough to send my sisters. 271 00:30:45,520 --> 00:30:49,440 Call me as soon as you get there. 272 00:30:50,320 --> 00:30:51,960 Of course. 273 00:30:55,240 --> 00:30:59,720 We're not told much about the journey. 274 00:31:01,320 --> 00:31:05,240 Often, the traffickers don't know themselves. 275 00:31:07,800 --> 00:31:12,760 Then we just wait for the call from Sweden, 276 00:31:12,880 --> 00:31:17,840 hoping it's them, saying they're safe. 277 00:31:20,080 --> 00:31:25,640 Those traffickers are such bastards! 278 00:31:28,600 --> 00:31:31,800 I think they're a bunch of psychopaths. 279 00:31:31,920 --> 00:31:33,440 Get in! 280 00:31:38,680 --> 00:31:41,240 You two! Get in! 281 00:31:41,360 --> 00:31:47,960 They are put inside a freight container, with lots of other people. 282 00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:51,920 It's a bit warm in here... 283 00:31:59,040 --> 00:32:04,640 Then it's loaded onto a huge cargo ship, 284 00:32:04,760 --> 00:32:08,920 and surrounded by other containers, 285 00:32:09,040 --> 00:32:11,720 blocking it, so they can't get out. 286 00:33:00,360 --> 00:33:03,280 My older brother called. 287 00:33:05,360 --> 00:33:08,280 It was... I mean, it was... 288 00:33:11,040 --> 00:33:13,880 Everything seemed normal 289 00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:18,040 as the ms Estonia arrived in Stockholm from Tallinn this morning. 290 00:33:18,160 --> 00:33:22,680 The 1,100 passengers were unaware of the drama happening below deck. 291 00:33:22,800 --> 00:33:29,960 This is incredibly inhumane. It's human trafficking at its worst. 292 00:33:30,080 --> 00:33:37,520 Confined in a trailer were 64 refugees, fighting to get out. 293 00:33:37,640 --> 00:33:40,840 It's unclear how long they'd been inside. 294 00:33:40,960 --> 00:33:46,640 Of the 64, 26 were children, the youngest just 8 months old. 295 00:33:57,400 --> 00:34:02,160 They nearly died on the way. 296 00:34:03,680 --> 00:34:06,680 They're not well. 297 00:34:06,800 --> 00:34:11,200 I think it's mainly the shock, but they aren't saying much. 298 00:34:13,440 --> 00:34:17,600 I know someone, who can take a look at them. 299 00:34:25,000 --> 00:34:31,480 I just need to get one thing straight: Your two sisters survived, right? 300 00:34:31,600 --> 00:34:34,200 - Yes. - They're not dead? 301 00:34:34,320 --> 00:34:38,080 And you have an older brother, and they all live in Sweden. 302 00:34:38,200 --> 00:34:39,840 Yeah. 303 00:34:39,960 --> 00:34:44,560 Because... I thought your whole family was dead. 304 00:34:44,680 --> 00:34:47,520 - Yeah. - And they're not. 305 00:34:52,600 --> 00:34:55,840 That's fantastic! It's really great to hear that. 306 00:34:55,960 --> 00:35:01,320 But in all these years, you never told anyone about your family? 307 00:35:03,200 --> 00:35:08,040 I think it was only after I started university 308 00:35:08,160 --> 00:35:12,200 that I began to open up a bit... 309 00:35:15,520 --> 00:35:19,160 To an ex-boyfriend. But that didn't go so well. 310 00:35:19,280 --> 00:35:23,640 I told him a little about my family. 311 00:35:24,720 --> 00:35:29,280 At first he seemed... 312 00:35:29,400 --> 00:35:31,120 Very understanding, 313 00:35:31,240 --> 00:35:36,520 but when we had a big argument, he used it against me. 314 00:35:36,640 --> 00:35:40,800 He said he would call the police and inform them 315 00:35:40,920 --> 00:35:46,120 that my asylum was based on a lie. 316 00:35:47,360 --> 00:35:54,440 Even after I broke up with him, I was terrified of it for years. 317 00:36:19,240 --> 00:36:21,600 I think it's a great house. 318 00:36:22,480 --> 00:36:24,880 It's nice. 319 00:36:25,000 --> 00:36:28,040 - The property is pretty big. - It's enormous! 320 00:36:28,160 --> 00:36:32,680 - Is that also part of the property? - Yes, all the way to the road. 321 00:36:32,800 --> 00:36:37,240 - It has a lot of potential. - There's a cat! 322 00:36:37,360 --> 00:36:40,440 It walks around like it owns the place. 323 00:36:40,560 --> 00:36:45,120 If we bring our cat, they'll have a big fight. 324 00:36:47,480 --> 00:36:50,680 - Try calling it. - What do you say in Danish? 325 00:36:50,800 --> 00:36:54,280 Here, kitty, kitty! Come here. 326 00:36:54,400 --> 00:36:56,800 It wants to. It's flirting. 327 00:36:56,920 --> 00:37:02,360 Honey, look at all those hazelnut trees! 328 00:37:02,480 --> 00:37:05,440 - I think they're hazelnut. - Come. 329 00:37:05,560 --> 00:37:08,520 - Are they hazelnut? - Yes. 330 00:37:08,640 --> 00:37:11,360 He's so cute. 331 00:37:11,480 --> 00:37:14,360 - They're hazelnut, right? - Kitty... 332 00:37:16,520 --> 00:37:23,000 I'm not sure. They're not hazelnut. They just look like it. 333 00:37:26,640 --> 00:37:30,280 You really get into the summer mood with the heat and... 334 00:37:30,400 --> 00:37:33,600 - But can you see yourself living there? - Yes, I can. 335 00:37:33,720 --> 00:37:35,800 Really? 336 00:37:37,320 --> 00:37:40,800 What do you think? 337 00:37:42,840 --> 00:37:49,120 Would you be able to live there, babe? I don't want to be out there by myself. 338 00:37:49,240 --> 00:37:54,200 - Yes, of course. - So you won't... 339 00:37:55,560 --> 00:37:59,160 Suddenly have all sorts of commitments all the time. 340 00:38:01,520 --> 00:38:06,200 The narrow roads and big fields... 341 00:38:07,120 --> 00:38:12,320 They remind me of my time at the asylum centre. 342 00:38:14,160 --> 00:38:18,720 I'm scared of feeling depressed out there. 343 00:38:25,400 --> 00:38:30,160 You'll never be a part of this family. Leave! I never want to see you again! 344 00:38:30,280 --> 00:38:35,560 But I'm carrying our child! You can't just throw me out! 345 00:38:42,840 --> 00:38:44,840 Police! 346 00:38:45,560 --> 00:38:52,080 We heard a noise. Open the door! We just want to talk to you. 347 00:38:52,200 --> 00:38:55,040 We need to see your papers! Open the door. 348 00:38:55,160 --> 00:38:59,840 Fuck! I hate them. They're the worst people in the world. 349 00:38:59,960 --> 00:39:03,520 They stank of vodka. It was so disgusting. 350 00:39:03,640 --> 00:39:06,520 We know you're in there! Open up! 351 00:39:06,640 --> 00:39:09,160 The nastiest people imaginable! 352 00:39:09,280 --> 00:39:11,920 Even worse than the traffickers! 353 00:39:12,040 --> 00:39:14,600 We have all day. 354 00:39:18,120 --> 00:39:23,880 I don't remember the day we fled, or how we got from Russia to... 355 00:39:26,760 --> 00:39:28,800 I don't remember. 356 00:39:32,160 --> 00:39:34,280 We drove for hours. 357 00:39:34,400 --> 00:39:40,320 Now I remember. We are in a big truck, 358 00:39:40,440 --> 00:39:45,080 which normally carried wood. They drive us. 359 00:39:46,320 --> 00:39:50,800 We're dropped off in a forest and have to sit there and wait. 360 00:39:50,920 --> 00:39:56,200 It's really cold, and we aren't dressed warmly enough. 361 00:40:20,920 --> 00:40:25,920 There are two things I'll never forget about that night. 362 00:40:30,720 --> 00:40:34,400 Come on, mother, we need to keep up. 363 00:40:38,360 --> 00:40:41,120 Faster! No talking. 364 00:40:42,560 --> 00:40:44,520 Wait! 365 00:40:46,240 --> 00:40:47,280 Stop. 366 00:40:56,440 --> 00:40:59,440 You there! Keep moving. Go on! 367 00:41:45,080 --> 00:41:48,840 - He needs other shoes. - We don't have any. 368 00:41:48,960 --> 00:41:53,400 Are you kidding? You know we're sneaking across the border, don't you? 369 00:41:53,520 --> 00:41:55,880 - What do you want me to do? - Take them off! 370 00:41:56,000 --> 00:41:59,560 - He can't just take his shoes off! - If you don't do it, I will! 371 00:41:59,680 --> 00:42:05,360 What's going on? You can't stop. You have to keep walking. Move! 372 00:42:13,440 --> 00:42:16,120 No! Stop! I'll carry him. 373 00:42:16,240 --> 00:42:18,840 I'll carry him. 374 00:42:18,960 --> 00:42:22,760 We won't wait for you. Go! 375 00:42:23,640 --> 00:42:29,320 You have to stay there, sweetie. He's helping us... 376 00:42:29,440 --> 00:42:31,280 Thank you. 377 00:42:38,920 --> 00:42:42,040 Wait! Come help us! 378 00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:54,520 She's holding us up. Why not shoot her in the head? 379 00:42:58,440 --> 00:43:04,120 "We'll shoot her in the head and leave her here." So cold-blooded. 380 00:43:04,240 --> 00:43:07,840 I'll do it. It's easy. 381 00:43:07,960 --> 00:43:11,960 No, I'll make sure she keeps up. We'll hurry. 382 00:43:13,440 --> 00:43:17,640 I think he said that to her son. 383 00:43:25,760 --> 00:43:28,920 My mother was also old. 384 00:43:36,040 --> 00:43:40,920 That woman... it's good she didn't understand Russian. 385 00:44:00,480 --> 00:44:06,160 They got this boat to take us to Sweden. 386 00:44:06,280 --> 00:44:09,760 Across the baltic sea to Sweden. 387 00:44:09,880 --> 00:44:13,680 I know the boat can't... 388 00:44:13,800 --> 00:44:17,600 My mother is terrified of water. 389 00:44:17,720 --> 00:44:20,520 - Are we all getting on this boat? - I guess. 390 00:44:20,640 --> 00:44:25,280 - But there's not enough room? - There has to be. 391 00:44:25,400 --> 00:44:29,600 We'll never convince mum to get in that. 392 00:44:29,720 --> 00:44:32,800 She has to. She can't stay here. 393 00:44:37,320 --> 00:44:45,280 You need to stay below deck, so the coast guard won't see you. 394 00:44:45,400 --> 00:44:50,120 We stripped the inside, so there's room down there. 395 00:44:50,240 --> 00:44:55,080 It will take two days to get to Sweden. Let's go! 396 00:44:55,200 --> 00:44:57,560 No... no! 397 00:46:00,120 --> 00:46:05,040 We sail for a couple of hours... I think. 398 00:46:05,160 --> 00:46:07,960 People start puking. 399 00:46:08,080 --> 00:46:13,080 It's bad, real bad. 400 00:46:28,360 --> 00:46:33,120 Water! Water is getting in! Help! Help! 401 00:46:33,240 --> 00:46:36,280 Open up! 402 00:46:57,000 --> 00:47:01,080 So you're bailing out water in the pouring rain. 403 00:47:01,200 --> 00:47:05,080 We need to keep bailing it out, because it keeps getting in. 404 00:47:05,200 --> 00:47:09,000 The boat doesn't even have a radio, 405 00:47:09,120 --> 00:47:13,800 so we can't call for help. 406 00:47:17,320 --> 00:47:19,600 No one knows how to swim either. 407 00:47:21,760 --> 00:47:25,600 I think it would have been easier if it was just me. 408 00:47:25,720 --> 00:47:27,920 My mother was terrified. 409 00:47:28,040 --> 00:47:34,240 Whenever she talked about death, she always mentioned water. 410 00:47:34,360 --> 00:47:40,400 Dying in water, drowning, was her worst nightmare. 411 00:47:46,000 --> 00:47:50,160 What's going through your head? 412 00:47:51,720 --> 00:47:56,720 Who do I save first, if the boat goes down? 413 00:48:06,240 --> 00:48:08,240 Because you knew how to swim? 414 00:48:12,320 --> 00:48:15,840 I didn't really think about that. 415 00:48:19,120 --> 00:48:24,960 Maybe I thought I could. I have no clue. 416 00:48:25,080 --> 00:48:28,160 I was more concerned... 417 00:48:29,680 --> 00:48:32,800 About who I would choose. 418 00:48:40,440 --> 00:48:42,840 A few days pass. 419 00:49:25,440 --> 00:49:29,720 Help! Over here! 420 00:49:32,400 --> 00:49:35,880 Over here! Help! 421 00:49:36,960 --> 00:49:38,560 It's from Norway! 422 00:49:58,840 --> 00:50:04,360 I don't know why, but as I stand there, looking at that ship, 423 00:50:04,480 --> 00:50:08,440 I just can't feel the joy. 424 00:50:10,960 --> 00:50:12,960 What's wrong? 425 00:50:14,640 --> 00:50:16,240 I'm embarrassed... 426 00:50:20,680 --> 00:50:26,520 Embarrassed and ashamed of our situation. 427 00:50:35,560 --> 00:50:40,640 People want to jump into the water and swim to the ship. 428 00:50:41,480 --> 00:50:43,560 I mean... 429 00:50:43,680 --> 00:50:48,040 They think that if they jump into the water and swim, 430 00:50:48,160 --> 00:50:51,400 the ship will pick them up. 431 00:50:51,520 --> 00:50:54,680 Everyone is so desperate... 432 00:50:56,080 --> 00:50:59,960 It's a fantastic opportunity! 433 00:51:00,080 --> 00:51:02,320 All of a sudden... 434 00:51:07,240 --> 00:51:13,040 Everything we want to achieve is right there. 435 00:51:13,160 --> 00:51:17,520 You could almost reach out and touch it. 436 00:51:33,720 --> 00:51:37,080 We have called the Estonian border police. They're on their way. 437 00:51:37,200 --> 00:51:40,040 They will take you back. 438 00:51:40,160 --> 00:51:44,080 We have called the Estonian border police. They're on their way. 439 00:51:44,200 --> 00:51:47,120 They will take you back. 440 00:52:04,520 --> 00:52:07,880 Then the police come and take us: 441 00:52:09,720 --> 00:52:17,680 Men in camouflage, with balaclavas and face paint. 442 00:52:17,800 --> 00:52:23,160 They scream and shout like crazy. 443 00:52:30,000 --> 00:52:33,440 I have no idea what's going on. 444 00:52:33,560 --> 00:52:37,400 I'm crying and crying. I can't stop. 445 00:52:38,800 --> 00:52:44,440 I can see the fear in the adults' eyes. They are terrified! 446 00:52:44,560 --> 00:52:48,640 Even the big men... you can see it in their eyes. They're petrified. 447 00:52:48,760 --> 00:52:52,040 It really scared me. 448 00:52:52,160 --> 00:52:55,680 If they are that afraid, what will happen to us? 449 00:52:55,800 --> 00:52:59,320 It must be serious. 450 00:53:04,440 --> 00:53:08,200 We are locked inside an abandoned building. 451 00:53:08,320 --> 00:53:11,400 There are guards, and on that same day, 452 00:53:11,520 --> 00:53:15,720 they run barbed wire around the building. 453 00:53:15,840 --> 00:53:18,280 People were in shock. 454 00:53:18,400 --> 00:53:21,120 Based on how they treated us, 455 00:53:21,240 --> 00:53:25,960 we thought we would be there for the rest of our lives. 456 00:53:26,080 --> 00:53:31,440 We have no idea what will happen to us. No one tells us anything. 457 00:53:34,080 --> 00:53:38,800 Journalists come and film us. We hope something will happen, but no. 458 00:53:38,920 --> 00:53:44,440 They get their footage of poor refugees and go home to do their TV shows... 459 00:53:44,560 --> 00:53:50,880 But nothing actually happens. It's just us and the guards. 460 00:53:51,000 --> 00:53:56,280 It felt like my life had ground to a halt. 461 00:54:00,400 --> 00:54:02,440 Then, six months later, 462 00:54:02,560 --> 00:54:06,840 they gave us two options: 463 00:54:06,960 --> 00:54:11,520 Stay here to rot, or... 464 00:54:13,280 --> 00:54:15,960 Go back to Moscow. 465 00:54:21,840 --> 00:54:26,680 As soon as we arrive in Russia, we are arrested by the Russian police. 466 00:54:26,800 --> 00:54:31,160 They want to send us back to Afghanistan, 467 00:54:31,280 --> 00:54:35,160 but luckily... the Russian police were so corrupt 468 00:54:35,280 --> 00:54:39,280 that if we gave them the last of our money, they would let us go. 469 00:55:07,280 --> 00:55:09,760 Thanks for letting me crash here. 470 00:55:09,880 --> 00:55:13,680 - Do you want a snack with that? - No. 471 00:55:13,800 --> 00:55:15,000 What happened? 472 00:55:15,120 --> 00:55:17,640 I just needed to get away. 473 00:55:17,760 --> 00:55:21,560 I told Kasper that I'm doing my postdoc at Princeton. 474 00:55:21,680 --> 00:55:24,360 - It didn't go well? - No, it didn't. 475 00:55:24,480 --> 00:55:29,120 He feels stupid because we looked at all those houses. 476 00:55:29,240 --> 00:55:31,880 He doesn't understand. 477 00:55:40,200 --> 00:55:45,080 It seems as if it's more Kasper's project than yours? 478 00:55:45,200 --> 00:55:50,880 I don't know. It's his dream, but I'd also like a place to settle down. 479 00:55:52,960 --> 00:55:55,800 - But? - Nothing. 480 00:55:56,960 --> 00:56:01,640 It makes me a little nervous. 481 00:56:01,760 --> 00:56:04,440 Because... 482 00:56:04,560 --> 00:56:10,280 Getting out of Russia was a tremendous gift... 483 00:56:10,400 --> 00:56:14,800 A tremendous gift. I got a life. 484 00:56:14,920 --> 00:56:20,480 I couldn't just give that up or... 485 00:56:20,600 --> 00:56:22,200 Yeah. 486 00:56:22,320 --> 00:56:27,680 If it wasn't for my siblings, I wouldn't be where I am today. 487 00:56:27,800 --> 00:56:35,200 So, I bear a tremendous burden on my shoulders... 488 00:56:35,320 --> 00:56:38,680 You could say. 489 00:56:41,320 --> 00:56:47,160 For example, my brother had a Finnish girlfriend for ten years. 490 00:56:47,280 --> 00:56:50,760 They wanted children, but he couldn't, 491 00:56:50,880 --> 00:56:56,800 because he had to save every penny to get us out of Russia. 492 00:56:56,920 --> 00:56:59,840 His girlfriend left him. 493 00:57:03,400 --> 00:57:09,560 How does not moving to the countryside help your family? 494 00:57:09,680 --> 00:57:13,440 Aren't you supposed to be on my side? 495 00:57:16,400 --> 00:57:19,840 - When are you leaving for the us? - On Sunday. 496 00:57:19,960 --> 00:57:21,920 - Sunday? - Yes. 497 00:57:22,040 --> 00:57:29,280 - How long will you be gone? - I'm coming home for a few days. 498 00:57:29,400 --> 00:57:34,040 - So, three or four months from now? - Yes. 499 00:57:43,320 --> 00:57:46,800 Look at this place. I can't believe it's ours! 500 00:57:46,920 --> 00:57:50,240 Only the best for you, my love. 501 00:57:55,360 --> 00:58:01,400 Something happened to my mum. She started acting strange in Russia. 502 00:58:01,520 --> 00:58:04,280 She got some kind of allergy. 503 00:58:09,520 --> 00:58:13,520 I think she's homesick. She misses Afghanistan. 504 00:58:23,000 --> 00:58:25,560 It's boring just staying home 505 00:58:27,840 --> 00:58:33,440 I'm a teenager, and I want to experience something different, 506 00:58:35,160 --> 00:58:37,080 so I go outside. 507 00:58:39,960 --> 00:58:45,600 This is a restaurant of Moscow-McDonald's joint venture. 508 00:58:45,720 --> 00:58:51,840 This company is known around the world for its prompt food service. 509 00:59:01,120 --> 00:59:06,200 When we get out of Russia, we should go to McDonald's to celebrate. 510 00:59:06,320 --> 00:59:11,480 I'd like a big Mac and a coke, thank you! It's going to be so nice. 511 00:59:11,600 --> 00:59:14,800 - Hey, you! Come with me! - No! We didn't do anything! 512 00:59:14,920 --> 00:59:19,200 Let me see your papers then. 513 00:59:19,320 --> 00:59:21,800 Just as I thought. 514 00:59:24,080 --> 00:59:26,880 - Stop! Don't... - Where's your money? 515 00:59:27,000 --> 00:59:30,920 We don't have any! We just wanted to see what's going on. 516 00:59:31,040 --> 00:59:35,520 - Can I see that watch for a second? - Don't touch him! 517 00:59:35,640 --> 00:59:38,080 Come here! 518 00:59:42,720 --> 00:59:48,160 - Look what I found. - Nice! I'd like to have some fun with her. 519 00:59:48,280 --> 00:59:51,920 Go on. Sit down! 520 00:59:52,040 --> 00:59:57,000 - What's with them? - They need to be taught a lesson. 521 00:59:59,200 --> 01:00:00,920 Sir! 522 01:00:01,800 --> 01:00:05,560 - Why are they here? - These two? They're greedy. They won't pay. 523 01:00:05,680 --> 01:00:08,360 - What about her? - She doesn't have any money either, 524 01:00:08,480 --> 01:00:11,840 we thought she could pay us in another way. 525 01:00:12,960 --> 01:00:14,560 You two! Out! 526 01:00:26,080 --> 01:00:30,640 I remember her face... Her black hair... 527 01:00:32,200 --> 01:00:34,320 Big, dark eyes... 528 01:00:41,600 --> 01:00:46,840 Fuck! Why didn't I protect her? Say something? I just let it happen. 529 01:00:48,160 --> 01:00:54,120 It's one of the most horrible feelings I ever had. 530 01:00:56,360 --> 01:00:58,840 I can't do this anymore. 531 01:01:14,680 --> 01:01:18,720 My brother isn't very old, 532 01:01:18,840 --> 01:01:22,080 but he assumed responsibility for us. 533 01:01:22,200 --> 01:01:27,160 He wants to send my mother and I first. 534 01:01:28,680 --> 01:01:32,600 This time, we're very careful. 535 01:01:32,720 --> 01:01:38,480 We make arrangements with a very expensive trafficker, 536 01:01:38,600 --> 01:01:44,080 because we didn't want to go through the same things again. 537 01:01:44,200 --> 01:01:47,920 We insist on a safe, secure route, 538 01:01:48,040 --> 01:01:52,520 which means we only have enough for one of us to leave. 539 01:01:52,640 --> 01:01:58,200 In the end, my brother decides that it should be me. 540 01:01:58,320 --> 01:02:04,120 It was horrible, because I felt awful about leaving him behind. 541 01:02:04,840 --> 01:02:08,160 Each week, each month, each year, 542 01:02:08,280 --> 01:02:12,160 his chance of having a decent future dwindles. 543 01:02:36,880 --> 01:02:41,560 Okay. You have to learn your name and date of birth by heart. 544 01:02:41,680 --> 01:02:48,400 You're Russian. Remember that. Speak Russian if anyone asks you anything. 545 01:02:48,520 --> 01:02:54,440 Destroy the passport as soon as you reach your final destination. 546 01:02:54,560 --> 01:03:00,320 If the police catch you with a fake passport, they'll send you back to Russia. 547 01:03:00,440 --> 01:03:03,760 Stick to the story we gave you. It's crucial. 548 01:03:03,880 --> 01:03:07,560 From now on, you have no family. They're dead. 549 01:03:07,680 --> 01:03:12,760 You fled Afghanistan on your own, without any help. 550 01:03:12,880 --> 01:03:16,440 If you say anything else, you'll be shipped back to Afghanistan. 551 01:03:16,560 --> 01:03:20,960 - What do you mean? - Don't tell anyone about your family. 552 01:03:21,080 --> 01:03:24,680 You have no family. Understand? 553 01:03:24,800 --> 01:03:30,400 Good. Now get some sleep. We have a long day tomorrow. 554 01:03:40,640 --> 01:03:45,560 The traffickers had all this power over my life. 555 01:03:47,160 --> 01:03:50,280 You're left completely powerless. 556 01:04:12,160 --> 01:04:16,920 I'm with another young guy, also alone, just like me. 557 01:04:17,040 --> 01:04:20,800 He's nice and funny. He makes me laugh. 558 01:04:20,920 --> 01:04:26,600 He's a bit boyish, but there is an age difference between us. 559 01:04:26,720 --> 01:04:30,360 He's closer to becoming a man. 560 01:04:30,480 --> 01:04:33,840 I think it's kind of sexy. 561 01:04:35,160 --> 01:04:38,120 I think I have a little crush on him. 562 01:04:38,240 --> 01:04:41,440 His gold necklace is so beautiful... 563 01:04:42,280 --> 01:04:47,160 Do you want to try it on? I'm sure it will look great on you. 564 01:04:49,560 --> 01:04:52,040 Very nice! 565 01:05:16,280 --> 01:05:19,880 Our flight to Istanbul will take around two hours. 566 01:05:20,000 --> 01:05:24,320 Thank you for flying Ukrainian international airlines. 567 01:05:44,560 --> 01:05:49,360 Once you pass by passport control on your right... 568 01:05:49,480 --> 01:05:53,560 Don't stare! Once you pass it, you're on your own. 569 01:05:53,680 --> 01:06:00,400 You're going to different destinations. You're going to Zurich, gate d27. 570 01:06:02,040 --> 01:06:08,640 You're going to Copenhagen, gate a9. 571 01:06:08,760 --> 01:06:12,880 - I thought I was going to Sweden? - No, you're going to Denmark. 572 01:06:13,000 --> 01:06:15,560 Denmark? But... 573 01:06:15,680 --> 01:06:20,760 It's the last trip, so you'll have to manage on your own from now on. 574 01:06:20,880 --> 01:06:25,720 Remember to call home as soon as you land. It's very important. 575 01:06:25,840 --> 01:06:28,480 That way, I can get my money. 576 01:06:28,600 --> 01:06:31,360 Okay. Now, go! 577 01:06:42,200 --> 01:06:46,520 - You're going to Zurich? - Yes, it's in Switzerland. 578 01:06:46,640 --> 01:06:51,120 - Do you have family there? - Is yours in Copenhagen? 579 01:06:53,600 --> 01:06:57,760 - Hey, thanks for letting me borrow it. - No, keep it. 580 01:06:59,360 --> 01:07:00,720 Are you sure? 581 01:07:02,560 --> 01:07:04,480 Thank you. 582 01:07:04,600 --> 01:07:07,560 - Good luck. - You too. 583 01:07:12,960 --> 01:07:16,920 It's weird that I can't remember his name, when he meant so much to me. 584 01:07:17,040 --> 01:07:23,040 He was part of something that had a huge influence on my life. 585 01:07:24,880 --> 01:07:29,880 Then, all of a sudden, I'm flying on my own, and landing in Copenhagen. 586 01:07:43,480 --> 01:07:46,520 I sit there waiting for a while. 587 01:07:50,400 --> 01:07:55,120 I see this big group of people, so I start to follow them. 588 01:08:13,400 --> 01:08:15,240 Move! 589 01:08:37,960 --> 01:08:40,200 I think I just said "refugee." 590 01:08:40,320 --> 01:08:43,880 - What? Refugee? - Refugee. 591 01:08:45,120 --> 01:08:48,400 Where's your passport? 592 01:08:48,520 --> 01:08:52,160 Karin is here because you're a minor, who arrived without a guardian. 593 01:08:52,280 --> 01:08:55,800 A guardian must be present at your interview. 594 01:08:57,480 --> 01:09:02,800 The interpreter is Iranian and I'm afghani, so we miscommunicate. 595 01:09:02,920 --> 01:09:06,920 Let's start with the formalities. What's your name? 596 01:09:12,800 --> 01:09:14,240 Amin. 597 01:09:14,360 --> 01:09:18,320 We need to know how you got here. 598 01:09:22,280 --> 01:09:26,720 There's nothing to worry about. Just tell us what happened. 599 01:09:27,800 --> 01:09:33,360 I'm interrogated for hours. 600 01:09:33,480 --> 01:09:36,360 I'm the only survivor from my family. 601 01:09:36,480 --> 01:09:41,680 I have to stick to the story the smuggler gave me. 602 01:09:41,800 --> 01:09:44,720 I saw my mother and sisters get killed. 603 01:09:44,840 --> 01:09:51,120 I'm sobbing. The damn story really hits me, even though it's not true. 604 01:09:52,640 --> 01:09:58,760 I'm crying uncontrollably. The tears just keep coming. 605 01:10:02,280 --> 01:10:07,560 My father and I hid in the desert for a year, before he was killed. 606 01:10:09,440 --> 01:10:15,680 I'm surprised to be crying over something that isn't true. 607 01:10:15,800 --> 01:10:20,440 It took a month to get from Afghanistan to Denmark. 608 01:10:23,280 --> 01:10:29,400 As soon as I'm done, I write everything down, 609 01:10:29,520 --> 01:10:34,280 word for word, in dari, in my notebook. 610 01:10:34,400 --> 01:10:37,400 I have no one. I'm all alone. 611 01:10:37,520 --> 01:10:40,560 That's the story I told... 612 01:10:40,680 --> 01:10:43,320 Everyone until now. 613 01:10:48,960 --> 01:10:54,840 It is not until we're driving through the town square, 614 01:10:54,960 --> 01:10:59,560 and I see the neon lights... 615 01:11:00,440 --> 01:11:03,880 That I realize... 616 01:11:06,920 --> 01:11:11,000 I'm not being sent back. 617 01:11:27,400 --> 01:11:30,000 - Hello? - Abbas? 618 01:11:31,160 --> 01:11:33,800 - Amin? - Yes. 619 01:11:33,920 --> 01:11:37,040 - Finally! Are you okay? - Yes. 620 01:11:38,000 --> 01:11:40,960 Where are you? 621 01:11:41,080 --> 01:11:44,000 - In Denmark. - Oh... 622 01:11:46,080 --> 01:11:49,520 - Why didn't you call earlier? - I couldn't find a phone. 623 01:11:49,640 --> 01:11:52,120 What? I can't hear you. 624 01:11:52,240 --> 01:11:55,400 - I couldn't find a phone. - Okay. 625 01:11:56,680 --> 01:11:58,960 I'll make the call to Moscow. 626 01:11:59,800 --> 01:12:04,200 They told me to say you're all dead... 627 01:12:06,640 --> 01:12:09,200 But you're not... 628 01:12:11,360 --> 01:12:13,560 What do I tell people? 629 01:12:17,280 --> 01:12:19,640 What do I say? 630 01:12:22,400 --> 01:12:27,360 You have to do what the trafficker said. Keep it secret. 631 01:12:27,480 --> 01:12:30,520 - But... - I'll try to figure out a way to meet. 632 01:12:30,640 --> 01:12:35,360 I'll let you know. Take care of yourself. 633 01:12:36,760 --> 01:12:39,360 Okay, bye. 634 01:13:03,320 --> 01:13:08,160 It took years before I could visit my siblings in Stockholm. 635 01:13:09,920 --> 01:13:15,480 It was very lonely and frustrating. 636 01:13:15,600 --> 01:13:22,960 The fear of getting caught and being sent back was so strong... 637 01:13:24,680 --> 01:13:28,960 That I couldn't tell the truth. There were lots of consequences: 638 01:13:29,080 --> 01:13:31,360 I couldn't be myself. 639 01:13:34,000 --> 01:13:36,560 It was really painful. 640 01:13:38,200 --> 01:13:41,960 Most people can't even begin to imagine 641 01:13:42,080 --> 01:13:45,480 how fleeing like that affects you... 642 01:13:45,600 --> 01:13:50,480 What it means for your relationships with other people... 643 01:13:50,600 --> 01:13:54,520 How much it destroys you... 644 01:13:57,440 --> 01:14:01,000 There were things I couldn't say about my family, 645 01:14:01,120 --> 01:14:06,080 like that I had siblings in Sweden, and that my mother was alive, 646 01:14:06,200 --> 01:14:09,680 because it didn't fit my background story. 647 01:14:09,800 --> 01:14:13,400 There were always constraints. 648 01:14:13,520 --> 01:14:18,080 Things had to be adjusted, retained, and suppressed. 649 01:14:22,840 --> 01:14:28,320 - So, what did you want to talk about? - I'd like some medicine. 650 01:14:28,440 --> 01:14:33,440 Okay, you'll have to see the doctor, but I can make an appointment. 651 01:14:33,560 --> 01:14:38,720 - What's wrong? - We spoke about it last time... 652 01:14:39,960 --> 01:14:43,560 The thing about me being attracted to men. 653 01:14:43,680 --> 01:14:47,920 - Oh... oh, that, yes. - I'd like some medicine. 654 01:14:50,320 --> 01:14:52,360 What do you mean? 655 01:14:52,480 --> 01:14:55,320 I want to get well. 656 01:14:56,920 --> 01:14:59,600 I don't want to like men. 657 01:15:00,560 --> 01:15:06,320 It's not that I considered it a disease, but I thought it could be cured, 658 01:15:07,200 --> 01:15:10,520 that it was something that could be cured. 659 01:15:10,640 --> 01:15:14,920 But she told me that it wasn't that simple. 660 01:15:16,120 --> 01:15:20,400 Okay, fuck... it's something that I have to live with: 661 01:15:24,920 --> 01:15:30,720 The fear of being rejected by your family 662 01:15:30,840 --> 01:15:33,880 for being gay, because it wasn't acceptable. 663 01:15:34,000 --> 01:15:37,680 Family meant a lot to me then, since I was all alone in Denmark. 664 01:15:37,800 --> 01:15:40,640 Little brother, you're finally here! 665 01:15:40,760 --> 01:15:45,880 It was the only reference point in our fucking, crazy lives. 666 01:15:46,000 --> 01:15:50,840 The thought of losing that was very scary. 667 01:15:50,960 --> 01:15:56,240 When are you going to find a girlfriend? Aren't the girls in Denmark pretty? 668 01:15:56,360 --> 01:16:02,680 Maybe I should come help you out. I'm sure I could find one for you. 669 01:16:03,800 --> 01:16:07,800 I didn't dare tell my brother. I was in Stockholm, 670 01:16:07,920 --> 01:16:13,120 and I had no plans to tell him, but it just happened. 671 01:16:13,240 --> 01:16:18,680 He kept pestering me about not having a girlfriend. 672 01:16:18,800 --> 01:16:23,440 Finally, I felt so intimidated that I said: 673 01:16:23,560 --> 01:16:28,800 "I don't have a girlfriend because I'm not interested in girls that way." 674 01:16:28,920 --> 01:16:32,080 Everyone went completely quiet. 675 01:16:40,360 --> 01:16:43,520 Are you sure? 676 01:16:43,640 --> 01:16:45,640 Yes. 677 01:16:45,760 --> 01:16:49,480 Have you ever been with a girl? 678 01:16:52,440 --> 01:16:55,120 Amin, let's go. 679 01:16:55,240 --> 01:16:58,800 - Where are we going? - Just come. 680 01:17:54,440 --> 01:17:56,120 Come. 681 01:18:00,200 --> 01:18:03,120 - Tell me what's going on. - You'll see. 682 01:18:13,640 --> 01:18:15,400 Go on. Have fun. 683 01:18:44,800 --> 01:18:48,040 There's nothing to worry about. We always knew. 684 01:18:49,760 --> 01:18:50,880 Thank you. 685 01:19:02,480 --> 01:19:06,520 Can I help you? What would you like? 686 01:19:12,600 --> 01:19:18,040 There I was. My first time at a gay club, all by myself... 687 01:19:18,160 --> 01:19:21,360 And I didn't go home... 688 01:19:41,400 --> 01:19:44,360 I always made my career a priority. 689 01:19:44,480 --> 01:19:48,520 When forced to choose between a guy or a career and an education, 690 01:19:48,640 --> 01:19:52,000 I always chose an education. Cold and cynical. 691 01:19:52,120 --> 01:19:54,920 Please welcome our next speaker: Amin nawabi. 692 01:19:58,120 --> 01:20:01,280 My siblings sacrificed so much for me. 693 01:20:02,400 --> 01:20:07,160 I had to do well. I felt I had a huge responsibility. 694 01:20:15,760 --> 01:20:20,000 It was important to be tough. 695 01:20:22,040 --> 01:20:25,720 Only now that I'm telling you about it, 696 01:20:25,840 --> 01:20:31,240 do I start to realize how hard it's been. 697 01:20:31,360 --> 01:20:33,760 It hurts to think back on it. 698 01:20:35,320 --> 01:20:36,960 Of course. 699 01:20:38,400 --> 01:20:41,760 Being back in the us... 700 01:20:41,880 --> 01:20:47,560 I'm starting to get really tired of constantly being on the move. 701 01:20:48,920 --> 01:20:51,200 It's good for my career, 702 01:20:52,440 --> 01:20:56,720 - but it's not that good for... - It's not that good for you. 703 01:20:56,840 --> 01:20:59,480 It's not that good for me. 704 01:20:59,600 --> 01:21:04,400 The first time I interviewed you back home, you mentioned 705 01:21:04,520 --> 01:21:09,000 that there were some things you needed to come to terms with. 706 01:21:28,160 --> 01:21:32,520 You grow up. You grow up too fast. 707 01:21:32,640 --> 01:21:36,640 When you flee as a child, it... 708 01:21:37,600 --> 01:21:40,760 It takes time to learn 709 01:21:40,880 --> 01:21:43,160 to trust people. 710 01:21:45,200 --> 01:21:49,680 You're constantly on your guard, all the time... 711 01:21:49,800 --> 01:21:51,760 All the time... 712 01:21:51,880 --> 01:21:59,040 Even when you're in a safe place, you're on your guard. 713 01:22:17,040 --> 01:22:21,120 I can feel that something needs to happen. 714 01:23:01,040 --> 01:23:02,920 Ta-da! 715 01:23:03,040 --> 01:23:06,280 I'm not going to carry you over the threshold. 716 01:23:06,400 --> 01:23:11,040 - You'd rather carry a cactus instead? - It's kind of the same. 717 01:23:13,680 --> 01:23:17,440 I'm just going to put this away. 718 01:23:20,600 --> 01:23:23,560 - It's a little... - Yeah. 719 01:23:24,520 --> 01:23:28,320 Look at the view. It's stunning. 720 01:23:28,440 --> 01:23:33,600 Every time you look at it, you're just like, "wowl'" 721 01:23:35,120 --> 01:23:38,680 the garden is really beautiful right now. 722 01:23:38,800 --> 01:23:44,200 I wonder if we have enough stuff to fill the place. 723 01:23:53,520 --> 01:24:00,360 Honey, I think I saw a big raspberry patch just outside the lot. 724 01:24:07,600 --> 01:24:11,000 - Look! That's all raspberries! - Wow! 725 01:24:11,120 --> 01:24:15,760 - It's so nice. - We just need to look after it. 726 01:24:17,680 --> 01:24:19,840 - It's wet here. - You can see it from here. 727 01:24:19,960 --> 01:24:22,640 The view of the house is better here.