1 00:00:02,910 --> 00:00:04,820 and the one son who had no choice 2 00:00:04,914 --> 00:00:07,239 but to keep them all together. 3 00:00:12,337 --> 00:00:14,246 It's Arrested Development. 4 00:00:17,133 --> 00:00:20,882 Michael was sharing some very important news with his parents. 5 00:00:20,970 --> 00:00:23,213 I am getting married. 6 00:00:24,349 --> 00:00:26,010 Who the hell to? 7 00:00:26,101 --> 00:00:28,058 Who do you think? Rita. 8 00:00:28,812 --> 00:00:30,638 - Her? - Why? 9 00:00:30,730 --> 00:00:32,723 Well, first of all, she needs a green card to stay in the country. 10 00:00:32,816 --> 00:00:33,896 There it is. 11 00:00:33,983 --> 00:00:36,939 She needs a green card to stay in the country because, secondly, 12 00:00:37,028 --> 00:00:38,357 we're really crazy about each other. 13 00:00:38,446 --> 00:00:40,274 You hardly know her. 14 00:00:40,532 --> 00:00:42,607 I know all the important stuff. She was in the Olympics. 15 00:00:42,701 --> 00:00:46,532 She's sweet, she's smart, she's beautiful, she's special. 16 00:00:46,621 --> 00:00:47,820 She was special. 17 00:00:47,914 --> 00:00:49,659 Are houses terribly hard to make? 18 00:00:49,750 --> 00:00:51,826 Actually, the hardest part is finding the land. 19 00:00:51,919 --> 00:00:53,874 But she wasn't smart. 20 00:00:53,960 --> 00:00:57,248 Instead of making houses, maybe you should make land. 21 00:00:57,340 --> 00:01:00,923 - For Rita had only mentally progressed... - On the ocean. 22 00:01:01,011 --> 00:01:02,755 to the level of a first-grader. 23 00:01:02,847 --> 00:01:05,053 There's no land on the ocean. 24 00:01:05,140 --> 00:01:07,714 Michael might have noticed her disability, 25 00:01:07,810 --> 00:01:10,847 if it had not been masked by her English accent. 26 00:01:10,980 --> 00:01:13,849 - You're brilliant. - Yeah, she wasn't. 27 00:01:13,940 --> 00:01:15,518 I know she's a really, really good person, 28 00:01:15,609 --> 00:01:17,685 and everything else is gonna be little surprises along the way. 29 00:01:17,777 --> 00:01:20,445 With the exception of that one big one. 30 00:01:20,529 --> 00:01:23,318 The wedding is in one month. 31 00:01:24,202 --> 00:01:25,445 A month? 32 00:01:25,535 --> 00:01:27,575 Now, look, just because a woman gets pregnant 33 00:01:27,663 --> 00:01:29,287 doesn't mean you have to marry her. 34 00:01:29,373 --> 00:01:30,783 Too many lives have been ruined 35 00:01:30,873 --> 00:01:34,788 because some cheap waitress at a HoJo's said she used an IUD. 36 00:01:34,877 --> 00:01:37,120 - It was Stuckey's. - But I believed you! 37 00:01:37,215 --> 00:01:40,166 Listen, she's not pregnant. Truthfully, we haven't even slept together. 38 00:01:41,425 --> 00:01:43,633 - This is funny! - He's gay! 39 00:01:44,387 --> 00:01:45,585 Where's your hand? 40 00:01:45,680 --> 00:01:47,804 I'm having my high school ring put on it. 41 00:01:47,891 --> 00:01:49,717 And my hook is stuck in the staircar. 42 00:01:55,524 --> 00:01:57,849 You think getting married will solve your sex problem? 43 00:01:57,943 --> 00:02:00,481 No, and we don't have a problem. 44 00:02:00,571 --> 00:02:02,645 We just haven't had the right opportunity yet. 45 00:02:02,738 --> 00:02:04,778 Lindsay said Rita slept over last night. 46 00:02:04,866 --> 00:02:07,701 Yes, but I gave her the bedroom because I didn't want her to feel pressured. 47 00:02:07,784 --> 00:02:10,869 Actually, it was Michael who felt a little pressured. 48 00:02:10,956 --> 00:02:15,782 And I like to keep the light on. That way I can see if you have a monster. 49 00:02:16,629 --> 00:02:17,791 Night-night. 50 00:02:17,879 --> 00:02:19,836 Can you shut the door on your way out? 51 00:02:19,923 --> 00:02:21,333 I can't believe you're not supporting this. 52 00:02:21,424 --> 00:02:23,749 Because it is obvious what she's after. 53 00:02:23,843 --> 00:02:26,130 - Our money. - Oh, God, our money! 54 00:02:26,303 --> 00:02:29,471 Let's just all relax and remind ourselves that we don't have any money. 55 00:02:29,559 --> 00:02:30,886 She's already gotten our money. 56 00:02:30,975 --> 00:02:33,265 Let's not forget she's the one that gave us the idea 57 00:02:33,353 --> 00:02:36,225 for that ocean-top town called Bluthton. 58 00:02:37,733 --> 00:02:40,733 Big deal, I had that same basic idea years ago. 59 00:02:42,152 --> 00:02:44,477 I thought you'd be happy, and I should have known better. 60 00:02:44,571 --> 00:02:48,405 Michael, be careful. People just see what they want to see. 61 00:02:48,494 --> 00:02:50,615 If she loved you, she'd show it. 62 00:02:50,703 --> 00:02:54,950 Michael was worried. His mother may have been making sense. 63 00:02:55,374 --> 00:02:58,043 So he returned home to talk to Rita. 64 00:02:58,126 --> 00:02:59,503 Here comes the bride. 65 00:02:59,588 --> 00:03:00,998 Hey, what are you doing in a wheelchair? 66 00:03:01,089 --> 00:03:04,672 No, no, no, it's a dolly, to help videotape your nuptials. 67 00:03:04,759 --> 00:03:06,917 I don't think I need any footage of my nuptials. 68 00:03:07,010 --> 00:03:08,635 Tobias, are you sure that 69 00:03:08,720 --> 00:03:11,472 this dolly isn't related to your recent health problems? 70 00:03:11,557 --> 00:03:15,057 Okay, so my legs and my left arm occasionally "go to sleep," 71 00:03:15,145 --> 00:03:17,682 and you want to call it a health problem. 72 00:03:19,565 --> 00:03:21,604 No, I can get up myself. 73 00:03:22,276 --> 00:03:24,684 Here we go. Let me get in the dolly. 74 00:03:24,778 --> 00:03:26,273 No, thank you. I don't need your help. 75 00:03:26,363 --> 00:03:28,487 It does seem like you've been having a whole lot of trouble 76 00:03:28,575 --> 00:03:32,358 since the hair transplants. Maybe you should see a bubuman. 77 00:03:32,704 --> 00:03:33,949 A "bubuman"? 78 00:03:34,040 --> 00:03:36,245 A doctor. It's a British expression. 79 00:03:36,333 --> 00:03:38,371 Like they say "go-up box" instead of "elevator." 80 00:03:38,459 --> 00:03:41,081 Yes, like when they say "poofter" to mean "tourist," yes. 81 00:03:41,170 --> 00:03:42,580 Boy, that Rita's a smarty. 82 00:03:42,671 --> 00:03:44,047 True, but it's not like anybody appreciates it. 83 00:03:44,131 --> 00:03:45,460 Mom and Dad do not like Rita. 84 00:03:45,549 --> 00:03:47,707 Are they crazy? She's amazing. I saw her last night, 85 00:03:47,800 --> 00:03:49,677 and she helped me with this little project I was doing. 86 00:03:49,763 --> 00:03:54,389 Maeby was struggling with a screenplay in her secret life as a film executive. 87 00:03:54,475 --> 00:03:56,183 - Is that a story? - Not yet. 88 00:03:56,269 --> 00:03:58,724 It doesn't have an ending. He's in L.A., she's in Japan. 89 00:03:58,813 --> 00:04:01,137 How do I get these two characters together? 90 00:04:01,231 --> 00:04:03,901 - Maybe they could walk. - Across the ocean? 91 00:04:03,984 --> 00:04:06,939 - if it's not too deep. - No, deep is good. 92 00:04:07,571 --> 00:04:09,196 People are gonna say, "What the hell just happened? 93 00:04:09,281 --> 00:04:11,523 "I better say I like it," 'cause nobody wants to seem stupid. 94 00:04:11,616 --> 00:04:12,696 I like it. 95 00:04:12,784 --> 00:04:15,822 The Ocean Walker. Holy crap, that's gonna look good on a hat. 96 00:04:15,914 --> 00:04:18,239 And Michael caught up with his brother. 97 00:04:18,332 --> 00:04:20,954 Well, I need a favour. As you know, I'm getting married in about a month. 98 00:04:21,044 --> 00:04:22,122 Say no more. 99 00:04:22,210 --> 00:04:24,168 Great. Are you sure that you know what I'm... 100 00:04:24,255 --> 00:04:26,164 - Yeah, yep, yep, yep. Got it. - Super. 101 00:04:26,257 --> 00:04:28,214 And just so that we're both clear... 102 00:04:28,300 --> 00:04:31,169 You want me to do a magic show at the wedding. I'm on it. 103 00:04:31,262 --> 00:04:34,514 So glad we pushed through that. No magic. 104 00:04:34,891 --> 00:04:37,216 Why? Because of the one little screw-up last time? 105 00:04:37,309 --> 00:04:40,309 - Put her out! Put her out! - Tracey on fire! Roll. 106 00:04:40,395 --> 00:04:41,938 Thank God we already did the pictures. 107 00:04:42,190 --> 00:04:45,309 Which reminds me that Rita shouldn't wear any hair spray at this thing. 108 00:04:45,400 --> 00:04:47,440 I just want you to be my witness. 109 00:04:47,528 --> 00:04:49,235 You want me to 110 00:04:50,863 --> 00:04:52,191 be your best man? 111 00:04:52,281 --> 00:04:54,405 It's just a signature I need on the licence. 112 00:04:54,493 --> 00:04:57,197 My son's not old enough. It's no big deal. 113 00:04:57,287 --> 00:05:00,204 I will not take this sacred duty lightly. 114 00:05:00,499 --> 00:05:01,697 I am gonna get you 115 00:05:01,792 --> 00:05:05,624 the single healthiest call girl that this town has ever seen. 116 00:05:05,714 --> 00:05:07,622 This is why I'm calling it a "witness" and not a "best man". 117 00:05:07,714 --> 00:05:09,291 All you gotta do is watch. 118 00:05:09,382 --> 00:05:12,798 I'm not gonna spend this kind of money and not watch. 119 00:05:12,886 --> 00:05:14,381 This may have been a bad choice. 120 00:05:16,182 --> 00:05:19,550 Hey, hello. Well, look at you two. Tweedledee, Tweedledum. 121 00:05:19,643 --> 00:05:23,806 Michael didn't mean it in that way. How could he? He didn't even know. 122 00:05:23,897 --> 00:05:26,899 We had the best time. She's got such an amazing fashion sense. 123 00:05:26,985 --> 00:05:30,020 - You got these jackets on inside out? - Yeah, that way you see the label. 124 00:05:30,111 --> 00:05:32,106 Yeah, I mean, that's what you're paying for, right? 125 00:05:32,198 --> 00:05:36,657 - It's a great statement on fashion. - Plus it doesn't tickle your neck. 126 00:05:37,621 --> 00:05:40,739 Michael took Lindsay aside to share his concerns. 127 00:05:40,830 --> 00:05:43,237 So, Lindsay, when did you first realise 128 00:05:43,332 --> 00:05:46,369 that you and Tobias had no chance at a physical relationship? 129 00:05:46,461 --> 00:05:49,378 Oh, my God. You think we have no chance at a physical relationship? 130 00:05:49,464 --> 00:05:53,297 So, just now. See, Rita and I have not been physical yet and... 131 00:05:53,387 --> 00:05:56,385 You don't think that she's doing this just for a green card, do you? 132 00:05:56,471 --> 00:06:00,635 No. No, she's not that kind of person. You just haven't been alone with her. 133 00:06:00,725 --> 00:06:03,013 Ask her to stay over at a hotel with you tonight. 134 00:06:03,102 --> 00:06:05,144 She's gonna know what that means. 135 00:06:05,231 --> 00:06:07,804 That is not a bad idea. Don't do that. 136 00:06:08,483 --> 00:06:12,432 And Gob began to prepare a magic trick for Michael's wedding. 137 00:06:12,905 --> 00:06:14,565 Takes his queen! 138 00:06:15,239 --> 00:06:17,777 And showers her with diamonds! 139 00:06:17,867 --> 00:06:19,992 Clubs. Club sauce. 140 00:06:20,453 --> 00:06:22,741 He covers her with club sauce. 141 00:06:22,831 --> 00:06:25,074 All right, that'll be my line if that happens. 142 00:06:25,167 --> 00:06:27,789 Is that a magic trick? I love magic. 143 00:06:28,378 --> 00:06:31,296 I don't appreciate the dry British humour. 144 00:06:33,216 --> 00:06:35,589 Please do a magic trick for me. 145 00:06:35,801 --> 00:06:37,545 Well, I shouldn't. 146 00:06:37,762 --> 00:06:43,101 I'd hate to be blamed for setting another one of Michael's brides on fire! 147 00:06:44,101 --> 00:06:47,020 Lighter fluid like Uncle Trevor uses. 148 00:06:47,105 --> 00:06:48,932 But wherever did it come from? 149 00:06:49,024 --> 00:06:52,024 Okay, I've got to get you into an illusion at the wedding. 150 00:06:52,109 --> 00:06:55,809 - How long can you hold your breath? - Long. One time, 20 minutes. 151 00:06:56,156 --> 00:06:58,647 Actually, her record was 20 seconds. 152 00:06:58,742 --> 00:07:01,612 You can stop it. Stop. Okay, I'll take your word for it. 153 00:07:01,703 --> 00:07:04,740 Now I just need to find a trick that puts you out of oxygen for 20 minutes. 154 00:07:04,832 --> 00:07:06,622 Sorry, did I hear the word "trick"? 155 00:07:06,708 --> 00:07:08,452 And it smells a lot like lighter fluid in here. 156 00:07:08,542 --> 00:07:10,952 You know, I did say no tricks, Gob, and I mean it. 157 00:07:11,046 --> 00:07:14,130 What if I find a trick that has her float to the altar or something? 158 00:07:14,215 --> 00:07:16,173 No, no, I'd love for her to walk, and not to drown. 159 00:07:16,259 --> 00:07:18,833 Or fly through the air or catch on fire. 160 00:07:18,930 --> 00:07:22,013 - Is she allergic to cat fur? - Hup, no tigers. 161 00:07:22,223 --> 00:07:23,421 Great. 162 00:07:23,892 --> 00:07:27,094 So, Rita, I was wondering 163 00:07:27,187 --> 00:07:31,350 if maybe you and I might head down to a hotel. 164 00:07:31,441 --> 00:07:33,351 Maybe some alone time. 165 00:07:33,484 --> 00:07:35,192 - Oh, yes. - Yeah? 166 00:07:35,403 --> 00:07:37,692 Maybe our rooms could touch. 167 00:07:38,573 --> 00:07:42,523 Well, I was hoping maybe for more than just our rooms to touch. 168 00:07:42,619 --> 00:07:47,197 I was thinking maybe we could be in the same room. 169 00:07:47,707 --> 00:07:49,367 Be in the same bed. 170 00:07:49,458 --> 00:07:52,876 I see what you mean. A real sleepover. 171 00:07:52,963 --> 00:07:54,160 Maybe. 172 00:07:54,256 --> 00:07:55,797 - Okay. - Really? 173 00:07:55,965 --> 00:07:57,624 Maybe I should go home and get my things. 174 00:07:57,717 --> 00:07:59,295 I do kind of miss my jammies. 175 00:07:59,386 --> 00:08:01,793 I think they're gonna have a lot of that stuff there. 176 00:08:01,888 --> 00:08:03,845 And my tiny teddy. 177 00:08:05,059 --> 00:08:06,884 Good. Yes, get that. 178 00:08:07,435 --> 00:08:10,638 And so George Michael drove Rita to Wee Britain. 179 00:08:10,728 --> 00:08:13,137 It's nice to be with someone young. 180 00:08:13,231 --> 00:08:15,901 We can listen to young people's music for a change. 181 00:08:15,983 --> 00:08:17,812 Great, yeah. Please. 182 00:08:25,203 --> 00:08:27,954 That's when he first grew concerned. 183 00:08:29,959 --> 00:08:32,164 And Rita packed for her sleepover. 184 00:08:32,294 --> 00:08:35,579 You've any idea what a sleepover is? Because it's not just sleep. 185 00:08:35,671 --> 00:08:39,088 I know what it is, Trevor. I've seen your secret magazine. 186 00:08:41,928 --> 00:08:43,921 I want to have grown-up fun. 187 00:08:44,013 --> 00:08:45,757 Spoon and figgy pudding. 188 00:08:45,849 --> 00:08:48,007 Rabbit down dum druggeries hollow. 189 00:08:48,101 --> 00:08:50,222 And I want to have pop-pop. 190 00:08:50,310 --> 00:08:53,348 Well, the very fact that you call it that tells me you're not ready. 191 00:08:53,439 --> 00:08:57,104 And for your information, that's a cricket magazine. 192 00:08:59,320 --> 00:09:02,237 Whether you like it or not, you're still a child in many ways. 193 00:09:02,322 --> 00:09:04,993 I've got a problem with you having sexual relations with that man. 194 00:09:05,076 --> 00:09:06,237 So do I. 195 00:09:06,326 --> 00:09:09,661 I mean, it's not your fault your parents were cousins, but here we are. 196 00:09:09,748 --> 00:09:12,783 Now I've been charged with taking care of you, and I'm bloody well gonna do it! 197 00:09:12,875 --> 00:09:17,289 Michael will be my cousin soon enough, 'cause we're getting married. 198 00:09:17,631 --> 00:09:19,087 - Married? - Married! 199 00:09:19,172 --> 00:09:21,923 - Totally out of the question! - Married, married, married! 200 00:09:22,007 --> 00:09:24,464 All right, that does it. You're not going anywhere. 201 00:09:24,552 --> 00:09:26,428 I'm putting the invisible locks on the door. 202 00:09:26,514 --> 00:09:27,593 It's not fair. 203 00:09:27,682 --> 00:09:29,555 - Lock, lock. - It's not fair! 204 00:09:29,641 --> 00:09:31,718 - Lock, lock. - It's just not fair! 205 00:09:33,312 --> 00:09:35,804 I've gotta find a new hiding place for that magazine. 206 00:09:36,149 --> 00:09:38,437 And Michael was waiting at the hotel. 207 00:09:38,526 --> 00:09:43,686 Hey, Dad, just wanted to let you know that I'm at a hotel with my wife-to-be, 208 00:09:43,782 --> 00:09:46,070 and we're very, very much in love. 209 00:09:46,617 --> 00:09:47,780 Put her on. 210 00:09:48,326 --> 00:09:51,328 Michael briefly considered faking the voice. 211 00:09:51,997 --> 00:09:53,324 She's in the shower. 212 00:09:53,414 --> 00:09:55,456 - I'll wait. - Let's wait. 213 00:10:00,172 --> 00:10:01,965 Unless you want me to just call you back, or... 214 00:10:02,049 --> 00:10:04,504 No, I got nowhere to go. I'm under house arrest. 215 00:10:04,802 --> 00:10:06,675 Let's watch something together. 216 00:10:09,139 --> 00:10:11,098 Wow, that Blossom grew up, huh? 217 00:10:11,184 --> 00:10:12,593 Say, how's that shower coming? 218 00:10:12,684 --> 00:10:15,852 - All right, look, she's not in the shower. - Really? 219 00:10:15,980 --> 00:10:18,731 She said that she'd meet me at the hotel and I called you a little prematurely. 220 00:10:18,816 --> 00:10:20,938 - But she is coming. - Really? 221 00:10:26,908 --> 00:10:28,616 Hey, put Rita on. 222 00:10:28,701 --> 00:10:33,030 And that's when Michael finally accepted that Rita wasn't coming. 223 00:10:33,873 --> 00:10:37,076 And that local calls were $2.95 a minute. 224 00:10:37,168 --> 00:10:38,329 Come on! 225 00:10:38,417 --> 00:10:40,376 That's where they get you. 226 00:10:44,591 --> 00:10:47,545 Michael drove to Wee Britain to call off the wedding 227 00:10:47,636 --> 00:10:50,721 that he now realised was not based on love. 228 00:10:50,807 --> 00:10:51,920 Who is it? 229 00:10:52,015 --> 00:10:55,634 - It's Michael, Rita. Can I come in? - I can't let you in. 230 00:10:55,853 --> 00:10:57,181 You know, you didn't show up last night. 231 00:10:57,271 --> 00:10:59,393 I think the least you can do is talk to me face to face. 232 00:10:59,480 --> 00:11:01,805 I can't. Trevor locked the door. 233 00:11:01,900 --> 00:11:04,307 He doesn't want me to be with you. 234 00:11:04,402 --> 00:11:06,727 What? He locked the door? You can't unlock this door? 235 00:11:06,821 --> 00:11:10,191 - I can't even see half the locks. - Rita, what? 236 00:11:10,283 --> 00:11:12,026 They're invisible. Trevor's the only one who can see them. 237 00:11:12,118 --> 00:11:13,281 - No, no, hey. Listen. - I'm trapped. 238 00:11:13,369 --> 00:11:16,954 I've got an idea. Go next to the window. I'm gonna climb up. 239 00:11:18,499 --> 00:11:20,742 - Be careful. - I will. 240 00:11:23,839 --> 00:11:26,294 And so Michael set about rescuing 241 00:11:26,382 --> 00:11:29,717 the beautiful, sweet, mentally-challenged woman 242 00:11:29,804 --> 00:11:34,263 he'd fallen in love with, without realising she was mentally challenged. 243 00:11:34,349 --> 00:11:36,922 - Yay, Michael! Yay! - Okay, come on out. 244 00:11:37,018 --> 00:11:39,556 - Trevor's back. - Oh, come on. Come on. 245 00:11:39,646 --> 00:11:41,270 - Hop on. - What? 246 00:11:41,356 --> 00:11:42,602 Hop on. 247 00:11:43,442 --> 00:11:44,686 Ready? 248 00:11:50,114 --> 00:11:52,441 Stop that! Both of you come back. 249 00:11:52,533 --> 00:11:54,194 You can't stop us. 250 00:11:54,285 --> 00:11:56,030 Nothing can stop us now. 251 00:11:56,122 --> 00:12:01,198 Nothing in the world of man, nor beast nor time. It's... 252 00:12:03,712 --> 00:12:04,825 That... doll. 253 00:12:04,921 --> 00:12:08,504 And so reunited with Rita, Michael told his parents 254 00:12:08,591 --> 00:12:10,583 - he'd be getting married tomorrow. - We're getting married tomorrow. 255 00:12:10,677 --> 00:12:12,834 Well, God help her if she tries to rename Bluthton. 256 00:12:12,928 --> 00:12:16,180 I'll sink it first. I swear, I'll sink the whole damn thing. 257 00:12:16,266 --> 00:12:18,424 They're going through with it. Tomorrow. 258 00:12:18,518 --> 00:12:22,303 But that's when George and Lucille had a surprise visitor. 259 00:12:22,398 --> 00:12:25,564 All right, where the hell is Rita? I'm her uncle. 260 00:12:25,650 --> 00:12:28,320 - Let the handouts begin. - There's not gonna be any handouts. 261 00:12:28,403 --> 00:12:30,277 And she is not gonna marry your son. 262 00:12:30,364 --> 00:12:32,903 - You're against this marriage, too. - Well, of course I am. 263 00:12:32,993 --> 00:12:35,483 Rita's not capable of making a decision like that. 264 00:12:35,578 --> 00:12:39,871 You are not gonna get Rita's millions just because she's mentally challenged. 265 00:12:39,955 --> 00:12:41,663 - Millions? - Millions? 266 00:12:41,749 --> 00:12:43,291 Mentally challenged? 267 00:12:43,711 --> 00:12:45,038 It's not polite. 268 00:12:45,127 --> 00:12:48,829 She owns all of Wee Britain. And also the Wee Britain in Cleveland. 269 00:12:48,925 --> 00:12:50,879 Course, we're probably gonna lose all that 270 00:12:50,967 --> 00:12:53,636 if her ridiculous idea for Sea Britain goes through. 271 00:12:55,138 --> 00:12:57,260 We are not after her money. 272 00:12:57,348 --> 00:13:01,428 Well, I don't think Michael even knows about her condition. 273 00:13:01,519 --> 00:13:03,761 Yeah, it's funny how Americans don't pick up on that. 274 00:13:03,854 --> 00:13:07,900 I think it's 'cause of her accent and the plastic surgery she's been able to afford. 275 00:13:07,983 --> 00:13:10,439 We wouldn't have this trouble if they'd met last year. 276 00:13:12,153 --> 00:13:16,199 I gotta put a stop to this. I'm gonna search every bloody hotel in town. 277 00:13:16,284 --> 00:13:18,490 Legoland. I think they said they were going to... 278 00:13:18,577 --> 00:13:22,327 - They did say Legoland. - I didn't hear anything about Legoland. 279 00:13:22,957 --> 00:13:25,364 He doesn't know what he's talking about. 280 00:13:25,460 --> 00:13:28,248 We think he may be mentally challenged. 281 00:13:28,838 --> 00:13:30,497 All right, then. 282 00:13:30,673 --> 00:13:33,590 We have got 24 hours to get them married 283 00:13:33,678 --> 00:13:36,346 before Michael figures out what she really is. 284 00:13:36,429 --> 00:13:41,933 This is the first time in two years you sound like George Bluth. 285 00:13:44,354 --> 00:13:48,482 Later that night, Michael was at the hotel with his bride-to-be. 286 00:13:48,899 --> 00:13:51,141 Rita, I've been really looking forward to this. 287 00:13:51,235 --> 00:13:56,193 Me, too. I want to have sexual relations. 288 00:13:56,282 --> 00:13:59,650 The mere fact that you call it that tells me that you are ready. 289 00:13:59,744 --> 00:14:01,535 That's why I brought this. 290 00:14:02,412 --> 00:14:04,820 Why don't you go ahead and whip out that tiny teddy? 291 00:14:04,916 --> 00:14:08,249 And then we're gonna think up a fun safe word. Okay? 292 00:14:08,336 --> 00:14:11,122 George Michael, I did not know that you were... 293 00:14:12,381 --> 00:14:15,335 Go ahead and talk out here. 294 00:14:15,426 --> 00:14:16,969 Just got back from the bumpaddle courts. 295 00:14:17,053 --> 00:14:18,961 Tomorrow I'm teaching her baseball. 296 00:14:19,054 --> 00:14:21,427 - Yeah, that might take a while. - Sorry? 297 00:14:21,557 --> 00:14:24,130 Well, listen, Dad, this is hard... 298 00:14:24,392 --> 00:14:26,185 This is hard for me to say this. 299 00:14:26,271 --> 00:14:28,097 I was videotaping Rita. 300 00:14:28,188 --> 00:14:31,772 Let's just say it would be cute if it was someone much younger. 301 00:14:33,153 --> 00:14:35,440 - I'm sorry. We should get another tape. - Yeah. 302 00:14:35,529 --> 00:14:37,237 They're not expensive. 303 00:14:40,118 --> 00:14:42,404 That's the plastic fruit, Dad. 304 00:14:44,329 --> 00:14:46,738 It's very convincing fruit, okay? 305 00:14:47,665 --> 00:14:50,157 Is she going back in for another? 306 00:14:51,504 --> 00:14:55,418 Well, you know, they don't even have bananas in England. Okay, Son? 307 00:14:55,507 --> 00:14:58,627 Now, I know this is hard for you, but it would be nice 308 00:14:58,719 --> 00:15:00,841 to be supported in some... 309 00:15:01,346 --> 00:15:03,589 No, she's going into the grapes. 310 00:15:03,682 --> 00:15:06,008 Yeah, she really liked those. 311 00:15:06,602 --> 00:15:07,977 I'm sorry. 312 00:15:08,312 --> 00:15:11,763 I think she might be retarded. 313 00:15:14,527 --> 00:15:16,648 Sorry. I'm really sorry. 314 00:15:21,784 --> 00:15:24,110 Say hello to my tiny teddy. 315 00:15:25,956 --> 00:15:27,496 Tiny teddy! 316 00:15:28,166 --> 00:15:30,371 And that's when it dawned on Michael. 317 00:15:30,459 --> 00:15:34,290 - Well, you teach kids, huh? - I like to think they teach me. 318 00:15:35,004 --> 00:15:37,129 That way I can see if you have a monster. 319 00:15:40,802 --> 00:15:41,965 Be careful. 320 00:15:51,061 --> 00:15:53,104 I've made a huge mistake. 321 00:15:59,989 --> 00:16:04,900 Michael had just been shown that his fiancée might be mentally challenged. 322 00:16:04,995 --> 00:16:06,274 - So... - But he needed proof. 323 00:16:06,370 --> 00:16:08,160 are you ready for lie-down kisses with me? 324 00:16:08,246 --> 00:16:09,789 Maybe we ought to just talk a little bit. 325 00:16:09,874 --> 00:16:12,625 You know, I mean, what the heck? For instance, you've never told me 326 00:16:12,710 --> 00:16:15,663 how many houses there are in the British Parliament. 327 00:16:15,754 --> 00:16:17,497 - Seven. - Are there? 328 00:16:17,589 --> 00:16:20,507 - The answer is three. - Does sound about right. 329 00:16:20,635 --> 00:16:23,754 - Three is the correct answer. - Come on! 330 00:16:23,846 --> 00:16:26,087 - Whoa, whoa, whoa. - Let's have our fun. 331 00:16:26,182 --> 00:16:29,182 Rita corny, Michael. 332 00:16:29,602 --> 00:16:32,520 So Michael used a line that was just as corny. 333 00:16:32,605 --> 00:16:37,849 You know, I think that we should wait until after we're married. 334 00:16:39,736 --> 00:16:41,015 Married! 335 00:16:41,112 --> 00:16:44,233 Married, married, married! Okay, night-night. 336 00:16:45,868 --> 00:16:50,613 And Michael felt he deserved a $15-thing of candy beans. 337 00:16:54,919 --> 00:16:58,668 The next morning, however, as Michael prepared to let Rita down gently, 338 00:16:58,756 --> 00:17:00,166 he was met with another surprise. 339 00:17:00,256 --> 00:17:01,502 Surprise! 340 00:17:01,591 --> 00:17:02,707 What's this? 341 00:17:02,802 --> 00:17:04,793 We're throwing you a wedding! 342 00:17:04,886 --> 00:17:06,926 Oh, how lovely! 343 00:17:07,179 --> 00:17:08,259 On us. 344 00:17:08,349 --> 00:17:11,266 Everything you see. Show them the waffle bar, Larry. 345 00:17:11,352 --> 00:17:12,465 It's over there. 346 00:17:12,560 --> 00:17:14,221 Check out banner, Michael. 347 00:17:14,812 --> 00:17:16,391 I'm gonna go set up. 348 00:17:16,481 --> 00:17:19,565 I was just gonna talk to Rita about all of this. 349 00:17:19,651 --> 00:17:24,278 Rita, I think that we should wait a little while. 350 00:17:24,364 --> 00:17:28,491 Wait? Why? I don't wanna wait. I want to get married! 351 00:17:28,575 --> 00:17:32,491 And have sexual relations like you promised. 352 00:17:32,580 --> 00:17:36,364 Where did you get this firecracker? I love her, Michael. 353 00:17:36,458 --> 00:17:39,128 So do I. I want to kiss my new daughter-in-law. 354 00:17:39,212 --> 00:17:40,755 Hey, not on our time, Larry. 355 00:17:40,840 --> 00:17:42,878 - Right on the lips. - No, no, Dad, just please take it easy. 356 00:17:42,966 --> 00:17:45,504 I'm gonna get my dress from the room. 357 00:17:45,594 --> 00:17:48,428 Yes, I'll help you put it on inside out. 358 00:17:48,514 --> 00:17:50,720 Let's not all get... 359 00:17:50,808 --> 00:17:52,217 Hey, Mom, what's going on? 360 00:17:52,307 --> 00:17:53,684 I thought that you guys were against all this. 361 00:17:53,769 --> 00:17:55,762 Well, we figured you know best, 362 00:17:55,855 --> 00:17:58,641 and who are we to interfere, and you love this girl. 363 00:17:58,731 --> 00:18:03,974 And the rest will just be little happy surprises along the way, like you said. 364 00:18:04,071 --> 00:18:07,191 Yeah, with the exception of the retard thing. 365 00:18:09,492 --> 00:18:12,494 - Oh, God. - Tell me you didn't just say that. 366 00:18:12,662 --> 00:18:13,989 You knew? 367 00:18:14,247 --> 00:18:16,702 You knew, and yet you still wanted me to go through with this. 368 00:18:16,792 --> 00:18:20,161 What can I say? I'm crazy about the little dullard. 369 00:18:20,254 --> 00:18:22,578 Oh, my God. She's rich. 370 00:18:23,050 --> 00:18:25,752 This is a new low, even for you, Mom. 371 00:18:28,262 --> 00:18:29,755 What is wrong with you? 372 00:18:30,014 --> 00:18:31,922 Larry, go to a mirror. 373 00:18:34,183 --> 00:18:35,678 - You're fired. - You're fired. 374 00:18:35,769 --> 00:18:39,302 What? It's over. And this is how you tell me? 375 00:18:39,396 --> 00:18:40,595 In the middle of a wedding? 376 00:18:40,690 --> 00:18:42,433 - You shouldn't have said anything. - You shouldn't have said anything. 377 00:18:42,524 --> 00:18:44,896 You were right. Now what am I gonna do? 378 00:18:44,986 --> 00:18:46,101 I've been thinking, you know. 379 00:18:46,196 --> 00:18:48,437 I mean, every society has their own rules about this stuff. 380 00:18:48,531 --> 00:18:51,236 For instance, in some states, it's legal to marry your own cousin. 381 00:18:51,326 --> 00:18:52,569 California's blocked it twice, 382 00:18:52,660 --> 00:18:54,405 but that's only because they tacked it onto an estate-law thing 383 00:18:54,496 --> 00:18:56,572 that wasn't gonna pass. We had the signatures, though. 384 00:18:56,665 --> 00:18:58,786 You're 16 and you know all that. She's 30-and-a-half, 385 00:18:58,874 --> 00:19:00,951 she probably can't list the seven houses of parliament. 386 00:19:01,044 --> 00:19:03,913 - There's three. - Now I gotta break her heart. 387 00:19:04,004 --> 00:19:06,840 Doesn't she have to leave the country if you don't marry her? 388 00:19:06,924 --> 00:19:09,416 Yeah, I guess I can keep my promise about that, huh? 389 00:19:09,510 --> 00:19:11,549 And there wouldn't be any real intimacy. 390 00:19:11,637 --> 00:19:13,759 And it would be the strongest marriage in the family. 391 00:19:13,847 --> 00:19:16,885 But, you know, as much as I'd like to, you can't ignore the fact that 392 00:19:16,976 --> 00:19:18,885 she is mentally disabled. 393 00:19:18,977 --> 00:19:20,389 Oh, my God. 394 00:19:23,317 --> 00:19:25,724 I'm wearing an inside-out bridesmaid's dress. 395 00:19:25,819 --> 00:19:26,897 You better catch her, Dad. 396 00:19:26,985 --> 00:19:29,941 Not gonna be easy. She's an Olympic silver. 397 00:19:31,241 --> 00:19:33,446 I just figured that one out. 398 00:19:34,244 --> 00:19:38,074 Okay, well, I have to go stop production on The Ocean Walker. 399 00:19:41,627 --> 00:19:42,906 You found out. 400 00:19:43,002 --> 00:19:44,829 Took me long enough. 401 00:19:45,169 --> 00:19:47,543 Maybe you're not smart, either. 402 00:19:48,132 --> 00:19:50,042 I didn't know until they told me. 403 00:19:50,134 --> 00:19:53,383 No, I'm just a narcissist who was too self-involved to see the truth. 404 00:19:53,471 --> 00:19:55,594 That makes no sense to me. 405 00:19:55,681 --> 00:19:58,717 Yeah, maybe you're right. Maybe I'm being too hard on myself. 406 00:19:58,810 --> 00:20:02,428 You know, the truth is that I did just see what I wanted to see. 407 00:20:02,521 --> 00:20:05,891 Rita, you're so beautiful and you're so sweet. 408 00:20:05,983 --> 00:20:10,146 And you deserve to find somebody a lot more like you. 409 00:20:10,237 --> 00:20:13,193 I don't think that either one of us would be happy. 410 00:20:13,284 --> 00:20:15,607 So it's bye-bye to Rita, then? 411 00:20:15,701 --> 00:20:17,740 Unless you really want to stay in America. 412 00:20:17,827 --> 00:20:19,868 I wanted to be with you. 413 00:20:21,124 --> 00:20:23,328 Rita! Time to go now. 414 00:20:23,918 --> 00:20:25,792 Back to England, love. 415 00:20:25,877 --> 00:20:28,749 Michael, will you come visit me lots? 416 00:20:28,840 --> 00:20:31,842 That's gonna be difficult, Rita. You're gonna be across an ocean. 417 00:20:31,927 --> 00:20:33,384 Well, you can always walk. 418 00:20:33,469 --> 00:20:34,880 Not on the water. 419 00:20:34,970 --> 00:20:37,296 Michael, you're such a grownup. 420 00:20:50,486 --> 00:20:53,356 Hang on a sec, that's part of your trick, right? 421 00:20:53,488 --> 00:20:57,188 No. That's not my trick, Michael. 422 00:21:04,500 --> 00:21:05,959 It's my illusion. 423 00:21:06,044 --> 00:21:08,617 Michael relives a wedding nightmare. 424 00:21:08,713 --> 00:21:09,911 Put him out! 425 00:21:10,005 --> 00:21:12,497 - My hair! My beautiful hair! - Push him in the pool. 426 00:21:12,592 --> 00:21:14,798 Why am I not going underwater? 427 00:21:14,886 --> 00:21:17,257 Dear God! Why am I not going underwater? 428 00:21:55,050 --> 00:21:56,129 English