1 00:00:03,571 --> 00:00:05,373 It was May... 2 00:00:06,740 --> 00:00:08,242 It was May 4, 3 00:00:08,276 --> 00:00:10,878 and in the bayside town of Newport Beach, 4 00:00:10,911 --> 00:00:12,480 the annual celebration 5 00:00:12,513 --> 00:00:15,383 known as Cinco de Cuatro was underway. 6 00:00:15,416 --> 00:00:19,187 The holiday started as a particularly vicious response 7 00:00:19,220 --> 00:00:22,390 by a young Lucille Bluth to the Mexican holiday... 8 00:00:22,423 --> 00:00:24,525 - This still isn't made? - ... of Cinco de Mayo. 9 00:00:24,558 --> 00:00:27,828 - No, no, it's not. -Rosa, why is this still a mess? 10 00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:30,164 She said it's, uh, it's Cinco de Mayo. 11 00:00:30,198 --> 00:00:32,200 She's taking, uh, the day off. 12 00:00:32,233 --> 00:00:33,701 - She said that? - Yeah. 13 00:00:33,734 --> 00:00:35,336 - She called it Cinco de Mayo? - She did, yeah. 14 00:00:35,369 --> 00:00:37,905 Oh, why can't they just call it May 5? 15 00:00:37,938 --> 00:00:39,440 This is what I was talking about. 16 00:00:39,473 --> 00:00:40,908 It's all part of the Mexican war on May 5. 17 00:00:40,941 --> 00:00:42,576 - War on May 5, I know, yeah. It is. -It is. 18 00:00:42,610 --> 00:00:44,712 But even a skeptical George Sr. 19 00:00:44,745 --> 00:00:47,281 soon found himself feeling similarly embattled. 20 00:00:47,315 --> 00:00:48,916 Where the are my socks? 21 00:00:48,949 --> 00:00:50,951 Now it's not so funny, is it? 22 00:00:50,984 --> 00:00:52,953 No, not funny. 23 00:00:52,986 --> 00:00:55,022 We should start our own holiday. 24 00:00:55,055 --> 00:00:58,259 You see, the Hispanics of Newport liked Cinco a lot, 25 00:00:58,292 --> 00:01:01,729 but high up on Coast Highway, Lucille Bluth did not. 26 00:01:01,762 --> 00:01:04,698 Doesn't look like they'll be done any time soon. 27 00:01:04,732 --> 00:01:07,435 And then Lucille had a horrible thought, 28 00:01:07,468 --> 00:01:10,804 a thought that was thoughtless and better to not. 29 00:01:10,838 --> 00:01:13,307 "What if," she thought with a sneering grin... 30 00:01:13,341 --> 00:01:18,279 Next year what if the party didn't even begin? 31 00:01:18,312 --> 00:01:21,149 And so began a holiday on the eve 32 00:01:21,182 --> 00:01:23,083 - of the fifth of May... ♪ The cockroach... 33 00:01:23,117 --> 00:01:26,254 originally intended to deplete the party supplies 34 00:01:26,287 --> 00:01:28,756 the Cinco de Mayo celebrants were relying upon. 35 00:01:28,789 --> 00:01:30,591 Fill the bay with chorizo. 36 00:01:30,624 --> 00:01:32,926 - Chorizo dump! Over 30 years, however, it grew 37 00:01:32,960 --> 00:01:35,596 and was soon embraced by the Hispanic community... 38 00:01:35,629 --> 00:01:36,830 You buy it, you break it! 39 00:01:36,864 --> 00:01:37,831 for financial reasons... 40 00:01:37,865 --> 00:01:40,634 and as the celebrations peaked 41 00:01:40,668 --> 00:01:44,305 with a boat parade called the Festival of Lights— 42 00:01:44,338 --> 00:01:45,973 another phrase they wanted back— 43 00:01:46,006 --> 00:01:49,643 one man was about to hit his lowest point. 44 00:01:55,316 --> 00:01:58,519 Happy Cuatro, happy Cuatro! 45 00:01:58,552 --> 00:01:59,787 Let's throw some more taco shells. 46 00:01:59,820 --> 00:02:00,788 Olé! 47 00:02:00,821 --> 00:02:02,323 Sally, can I...? 48 00:02:02,356 --> 00:02:05,025 I need to speak to Lucille 2, please. 49 00:02:05,058 --> 00:02:07,995 It's okay, Sally, I'll talk to Michael. 50 00:02:08,028 --> 00:02:09,530 This is Lucille 2, 51 00:02:09,563 --> 00:02:12,600 a longtime patron of the Bluth family. 52 00:02:12,633 --> 00:02:14,468 I'll be downstairs kicking myself 53 00:02:14,502 --> 00:02:16,670 for not marrying you so many years ago. 54 00:02:16,704 --> 00:02:19,607 Michael, do you have something for me? 55 00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:20,941 Does bad news count? 56 00:02:20,974 --> 00:02:22,443 There's that Bluth wit. 57 00:02:22,476 --> 00:02:24,312 Oh, I love your family. 58 00:02:24,345 --> 00:02:25,779 She certainly had demonstrated that 59 00:02:25,813 --> 00:02:27,948 with many of the men in the family... 60 00:02:27,981 --> 00:02:30,017 Oh, stop it, you're making me dizzy. 61 00:02:30,050 --> 00:02:32,553 even having fallen for a few, 62 00:02:32,586 --> 00:02:35,656 although some of that was the vertigo she suffered from. 63 00:02:35,689 --> 00:02:37,057 But not all of it. 64 00:02:37,090 --> 00:02:39,993 - Dad? - No, no. 65 00:02:40,027 --> 00:02:43,063 But seriously, she had gotten intimate with Buster and Gob. 66 00:02:43,096 --> 00:02:44,198 I need that money I lent you. 67 00:02:44,232 --> 00:02:46,367 I am in the middle of a campaign 68 00:02:46,400 --> 00:02:48,202 and I am desperate for the ad money. 69 00:02:48,236 --> 00:02:49,337 You're going to get it. 70 00:02:49,370 --> 00:02:51,071 I just need an extension. 71 00:02:51,104 --> 00:02:52,206 Why don't you go to your family? 72 00:02:52,240 --> 00:02:54,074 I don't need them. 73 00:02:54,107 --> 00:02:55,643 What I need is you. 74 00:02:55,676 --> 00:02:57,945 What are you suggesting? 75 00:03:06,720 --> 00:03:08,889 No. 76 00:03:08,922 --> 00:03:12,226 Okay, that was nasty. 77 00:03:12,260 --> 00:03:13,694 Aren't you sweet? 78 00:03:13,727 --> 00:03:15,195 - Thank you. - Okay. 79 00:03:16,897 --> 00:03:19,333 Don't tilt your head, okay? 80 00:03:19,367 --> 00:03:21,835 And that's when Michael debased himself. 81 00:03:21,869 --> 00:03:23,036 What are you doing? 82 00:03:23,070 --> 00:03:25,539 I'm gonna have sex with you for money. 83 00:03:29,377 --> 00:03:31,412 Later that night, 84 00:03:31,445 --> 00:03:34,448 after Michael did something unthinkable, 85 00:03:34,482 --> 00:03:37,050 he was looking for a place to hide 86 00:03:37,084 --> 00:03:40,020 and he returned to a long neglected model home 87 00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:41,789 he believed to be empty. 88 00:03:43,557 --> 00:03:45,526 Thanks for coming 89 00:03:45,559 --> 00:03:47,695 so late, Maria, I know that you won't be cleaning up 90 00:03:47,728 --> 00:03:49,897 tomorrow, and we did make quite a mess of that bedroom. 91 00:03:49,930 --> 00:03:51,732 Michael. 92 00:03:51,765 --> 00:03:53,934 This is Michael's brother Gob. 93 00:03:53,967 --> 00:03:55,769 Neither had expected to see each other 94 00:03:55,803 --> 00:03:57,905 after some recent unpleasantness. 95 00:03:57,938 --> 00:03:59,607 I didn't expect to be seeing you again 96 00:03:59,640 --> 00:04:01,809 after all the unpleasantness. 97 00:04:01,842 --> 00:04:03,644 I-I've, I've, I've been out of control. 98 00:04:03,677 --> 00:04:05,245 Sorry. 99 00:04:05,279 --> 00:04:06,747 In fact, I-I just did something that I-I don't, 100 00:04:06,780 --> 00:04:08,749 I don't, I don't know why I did it. 101 00:04:08,782 --> 00:04:09,983 Do you want to talk about it? 102 00:04:10,017 --> 00:04:12,219 No, I do not, I've said too much already. 103 00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:13,387 You cannot help me. 104 00:04:13,421 --> 00:04:14,422 Well, I wasn't hoping to help. 105 00:04:14,455 --> 00:04:15,723 I was hoping to rub it in 106 00:04:15,756 --> 00:04:17,491 because of all the unpleasantness. 107 00:04:17,525 --> 00:04:19,893 - Got it. -Oh, damn it, I meant to throw these in the chipper. 108 00:04:19,927 --> 00:04:22,596 God, I'm just not into Cuatro this year. 109 00:04:22,630 --> 00:04:24,498 I was the one that was wrong, not you, 110 00:04:24,532 --> 00:04:26,567 and besides, you could not make me feel worse right now. 111 00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:27,801 Well, I'd be willing 112 00:04:27,835 --> 00:04:29,236 to let you have your apology back 113 00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:30,738 if you give me the chance to try. 114 00:04:30,771 --> 00:04:32,105 I mean, I'm gonna need some specifics 115 00:04:32,139 --> 00:04:33,607 about the thing that you're ashamed of. 116 00:04:33,641 --> 00:04:35,876 Otherwise I'll just be taking general potshots. 117 00:04:38,045 --> 00:04:41,815 Bad example: if you were ashamed of being in love with a man, 118 00:04:41,849 --> 00:04:44,084 suddenly discovered these new feelings, 119 00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:46,687 then I might say something like, "Homo much?" 120 00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:47,955 - It's not that. - I said "Bad example." 121 00:04:47,988 --> 00:04:49,490 I went to go see Lucille 2 122 00:04:49,523 --> 00:04:52,826 and I just, I just— I lost control. 123 00:04:52,860 --> 00:04:54,762 I did something that I wish I could forget. 124 00:04:54,795 --> 00:04:56,630 You have got no idea how I feel. 125 00:04:56,664 --> 00:04:58,332 Well, if you're talking about doing something embarrassing 126 00:04:58,366 --> 00:04:59,833 with a woman, then no, I don't. 127 00:04:59,867 --> 00:05:01,435 But he should have. 128 00:05:01,469 --> 00:05:03,303 It's almost as if he found a way 129 00:05:03,337 --> 00:05:06,640 to simulate amnesia. 130 00:05:06,674 --> 00:05:08,709 Hey, I'm down to my last Forget-Me-Now. 131 00:05:08,742 --> 00:05:10,944 In fact, that is what he had done. 132 00:05:10,978 --> 00:05:13,781 Hey, remember me? 133 00:05:13,814 --> 00:05:15,483 Gob had always taken a pill 134 00:05:15,516 --> 00:05:17,851 he called a Forget-Me-Now for that... 135 00:05:17,885 --> 00:05:19,653 - No más. - ¿No más? 136 00:05:19,687 --> 00:05:20,954 but was commonly known as a roofie. 137 00:05:20,988 --> 00:05:21,989 There's only one left. 138 00:05:22,022 --> 00:05:23,557 How could that possibly be? 139 00:05:23,591 --> 00:05:24,658 Unless... John Beard Jr. 140 00:05:24,692 --> 00:05:26,293 I don't need to get into it. 141 00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:28,028 I came here because I thought the house was empty, 142 00:05:28,061 --> 00:05:29,863 but I can go somewhere else, okay? 143 00:05:29,897 --> 00:05:32,633 - Hey, listen, Michael, if you want, we can split this. -No, 144 00:05:32,666 --> 00:05:34,568 I feel like this is something that I shouldn't forget, 145 00:05:34,602 --> 00:05:36,404 okay, and believe me, this is the last time 146 00:05:36,437 --> 00:05:38,572 I ever judge you for anything 147 00:05:38,606 --> 00:05:39,540 that you ever do. 148 00:05:39,573 --> 00:05:41,375 Oh, 149 00:05:42,376 --> 00:05:43,811 Is that who you were with? 150 00:05:43,844 --> 00:05:45,646 I knew it, I always knew it. 151 00:05:45,679 --> 00:05:47,214 - Take this, Michael, forget, forget. -No, no, no, no, no. 152 00:05:47,247 --> 00:05:48,649 Put the mask back on. Forget this, Michael. 153 00:05:48,682 --> 00:05:50,751 - Forget, forget, Michael. - Gob. 154 00:05:50,784 --> 00:05:52,152 Forget, now is the time to forget. 155 00:05:52,185 --> 00:05:53,487 Now you're forgetting. 156 00:05:53,521 --> 00:05:56,156 - Now you're forgetting. - God. 157 00:06:02,062 --> 00:06:04,832 Stupid, forgetful Michael. 158 00:06:04,865 --> 00:06:06,734 Now, the story of a family 159 00:06:06,767 --> 00:06:10,504 whose future was abruptly canceled and the one son 160 00:06:10,538 --> 00:06:12,573 who had no choice but to keep himself together. 161 00:06:17,945 --> 00:06:19,747 It's Michael's... 162 00:06:21,949 --> 00:06:25,252 Six months before the Forget-Me-Now, 163 00:06:25,285 --> 00:06:27,354 Michael had made good on a long-standing threat 164 00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:29,022 to go to Phoenix, 165 00:06:29,056 --> 00:06:33,226 and even though the Phoenix he went to was online, 166 00:06:33,260 --> 00:06:36,029 he still enjoyed the full college experience 167 00:06:36,063 --> 00:06:38,932 by living in a dorm room while doing so. 168 00:06:38,966 --> 00:06:41,569 George Michael, what is my log-on password again? 169 00:06:41,602 --> 00:06:43,637 Unfortunately it was his son's dorm room 170 00:06:43,671 --> 00:06:45,405 at the University of California at Irvine. 171 00:06:45,439 --> 00:06:49,977 Dad, come on, what have we said is the most important thing? 172 00:06:50,010 --> 00:06:51,612 I have tried "family." 173 00:06:51,645 --> 00:06:53,113 - It does not work for me. - No, privacy. 174 00:06:53,146 --> 00:06:55,449 This is Michael's son 175 00:06:55,483 --> 00:06:58,085 George Michael— a nice kid. 176 00:06:58,118 --> 00:07:00,721 Uh, no one should have your password but you. 177 00:07:00,754 --> 00:07:02,089 I shouldn't even know it. 178 00:07:02,122 --> 00:07:04,057 - You've made that point. - Have I? 179 00:07:04,091 --> 00:07:06,226 My point is, we have no secrets from each other. 180 00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:08,796 We know everything there is to know about each other. 181 00:07:08,829 --> 00:07:09,763 We're like twins. 182 00:07:09,797 --> 00:07:11,799 I don't see us as twins. 183 00:07:11,832 --> 00:07:14,668 Yeah? You name me one way in which we're different. 184 00:07:14,702 --> 00:07:16,570 I think you tend to be better 185 00:07:16,604 --> 00:07:19,940 at feeling like you belong places. 186 00:07:19,973 --> 00:07:21,975 Do I? 187 00:07:24,144 --> 00:07:27,347 I want you to start feeling like you belong places. 188 00:07:27,380 --> 00:07:28,448 Look at that guy. 189 00:07:28,482 --> 00:07:30,751 He thinks he's a musician. 190 00:07:30,784 --> 00:07:32,285 You know, like, you've got to start having 191 00:07:32,319 --> 00:07:34,688 a little bit better sense of humor about yourself. 192 00:07:34,722 --> 00:07:35,689 Look at me. 193 00:07:35,723 --> 00:07:36,957 People say I don't age. 194 00:07:36,990 --> 00:07:38,458 You know, like, "Hey, look at that guy. 195 00:07:38,492 --> 00:07:40,127 He's got the hair of a teenager." 196 00:07:40,160 --> 00:07:42,596 And I say, "Take your best shot" 197 00:07:42,630 --> 00:07:44,464 because I think that that's a good thing 198 00:07:44,498 --> 00:07:46,099 because I'm self-effacing. 199 00:07:46,133 --> 00:07:47,467 Hmm? 200 00:07:47,501 --> 00:07:48,969 I want you to be able to do that. 201 00:07:49,002 --> 00:07:50,704 Well, it's hard to be self-effacing 202 00:07:50,738 --> 00:07:54,341 when you're a perfect specimen of rugged manlessness. 203 00:07:56,810 --> 00:07:58,512 Well, you can't hear this, but, 204 00:07:58,546 --> 00:08:00,013 but we're gonna work on it. 205 00:08:00,047 --> 00:08:01,815 That's why I'm living in your dorm. 206 00:08:01,849 --> 00:08:03,116 Well, I thought you were living here 207 00:08:03,150 --> 00:08:04,852 because you had nowhere else to go. 208 00:08:04,885 --> 00:08:07,220 Yeah, and because of the fact you had this big double room 209 00:08:07,254 --> 00:08:08,522 all to yourself because of your name. 210 00:08:08,556 --> 00:08:10,323 The name George Michael 211 00:08:10,357 --> 00:08:13,026 did create confusion in the campus housing office. 212 00:08:13,060 --> 00:08:14,662 This guy's name is actually George Michael. 213 00:08:14,695 --> 00:08:15,863 No, it's two different guys. 214 00:08:15,896 --> 00:08:18,566 They're twins, ugly. 215 00:08:18,599 --> 00:08:20,534 We should sign them up for Twin Club. 216 00:08:20,568 --> 00:08:23,671 And let's give them the big handicap room. 217 00:08:23,704 --> 00:08:25,205 Yeah, you see, that's the other thing, is that 218 00:08:25,238 --> 00:08:27,407 I kind of wanted to use this time to almost kind of, 219 00:08:27,440 --> 00:08:30,043 you know, wean off of the name George Michael. 220 00:08:30,077 --> 00:08:32,813 What? 221 00:08:32,846 --> 00:08:35,515 I don't know, you know, you get older, you do 222 00:08:35,549 --> 00:08:37,885 a something search of your own name... 223 00:08:37,918 --> 00:08:39,753 In George Michael's case, you find this. 224 00:08:39,787 --> 00:08:42,856 It was in this men's room in— get this— Beverly Hills 225 00:08:42,890 --> 00:08:45,158 that singer George Michael was arrested 226 00:08:45,192 --> 00:08:48,328 for soliciting sex from an undercover cop. 227 00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:51,331 Well, it was your mother's idea to call you George Michael, 228 00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:52,532 you know, and I think it was just 229 00:08:52,566 --> 00:08:54,034 so that we didn't confuse you 230 00:08:54,067 --> 00:08:56,436 with your Uncle George or your Grandfather George. 231 00:08:56,469 --> 00:08:59,072 - Right. -I got it, let's call you Boy George. 232 00:08:59,106 --> 00:09:00,040 Singer Boy George 233 00:09:00,073 --> 00:09:01,041 in the news again today, 234 00:09:01,074 --> 00:09:02,175 this time for sexual assault 235 00:09:02,209 --> 00:09:04,111 in a men's public bathroom. 236 00:09:04,144 --> 00:09:05,512 Beatrix Hebberly-Sneed, Wee BBC 2. 237 00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:07,280 You know, I think 238 00:09:07,314 --> 00:09:09,416 I'll, I'll just— I'll stick with George Michael. 239 00:09:09,449 --> 00:09:11,251 I mean, at least it was consensual. 240 00:09:11,284 --> 00:09:13,453 But I guess the, uh, the bigger point 241 00:09:13,486 --> 00:09:15,756 I'm making is just that, uh, it's hard to have 242 00:09:15,789 --> 00:09:17,457 any privacy now that they've stuck me 243 00:09:17,490 --> 00:09:19,793 - with an actual roommate. - Well, you know, listen, 244 00:09:19,827 --> 00:09:22,129 I'm all for kicking P-Hound out, you know that. 245 00:09:22,162 --> 00:09:24,364 Well, you know, I didn't really mean privacy from him. 246 00:09:24,397 --> 00:09:26,399 I know, I know, I know. 247 00:09:29,136 --> 00:09:31,138 You want your space from me? 248 00:09:31,171 --> 00:09:32,773 Um, look, 249 00:09:32,806 --> 00:09:36,476 listen, hey, hey, look, look, listen. 250 00:09:36,509 --> 00:09:38,646 Listen, look it. 251 00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:41,481 Are you listening? You want your space. 252 00:09:41,514 --> 00:09:42,783 I get it. 253 00:09:42,816 --> 00:09:46,153 I did not mean to crowd you, pal. 254 00:09:46,186 --> 00:09:49,156 Listen, I thought that this was, that this was fun, and, 255 00:09:49,189 --> 00:09:51,391 - and it is okay if you didn't see it that way. -Oh, Dad. 256 00:09:51,424 --> 00:09:53,426 Buddy, it's not like I don't have someplace to go. 257 00:09:53,460 --> 00:09:55,595 You know, I'll just go right back to the model home. 258 00:09:55,629 --> 00:09:57,330 They don't have Internet there, so I'll just put 259 00:09:57,364 --> 00:09:59,166 the law school on, on, on pause. 260 00:09:59,199 --> 00:10:01,001 It's not like the first time that I've done that. 261 00:10:01,034 --> 00:10:03,070 You know, last time I did that, you were born. You know what? 262 00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:04,571 Screw it, maybe I'll just go to the real Phoenix 263 00:10:04,604 --> 00:10:06,139 and finish school. 264 00:10:06,173 --> 00:10:07,507 They got one in Costa Mesa. 265 00:10:07,540 --> 00:10:09,276 Plus they want me for an article. 266 00:10:09,309 --> 00:10:10,678 Media wants to talk to Daddy about the real 267 00:10:10,711 --> 00:10:12,245 estate business, and once they do that, 268 00:10:12,279 --> 00:10:14,081 I'm gonna be right back on top. 269 00:10:14,114 --> 00:10:15,482 You know what? This is your school rally shirt. 270 00:10:15,515 --> 00:10:17,284 You know, same size— medium. 271 00:10:17,317 --> 00:10:19,252 Do you know where mine is? We wear the same size like twi... 272 00:10:19,286 --> 00:10:21,689 We're just like twin— couple of identical... 273 00:10:21,722 --> 00:10:23,323 Dad, Dad, no, I... 274 00:10:23,356 --> 00:10:26,960 Look, I was not talking about privacy from you per se. 275 00:10:26,994 --> 00:10:31,331 I was talking about my software. 276 00:10:31,364 --> 00:10:32,866 What's that? 277 00:10:32,900 --> 00:10:35,435 It's privacy software. 278 00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:36,970 That's why the word came up. 279 00:10:37,004 --> 00:10:38,638 It's not why the word came up. 280 00:10:38,672 --> 00:10:40,607 But George Michael was writing code 281 00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:42,375 for a block software 282 00:10:42,409 --> 00:10:45,012 with his roommate that was proving challenging. 283 00:10:45,045 --> 00:10:46,346 you're leaving a hole 284 00:10:46,379 --> 00:10:48,115 just right in the middle of the block. 285 00:10:48,148 --> 00:10:50,217 Both because of online threats to his privacy... 286 00:10:50,250 --> 00:10:52,152 Otherwise, people will be able to hack in through 287 00:10:52,185 --> 00:10:54,321 a mobile platform portal, and it won't be a block anything 3G. 288 00:10:54,354 --> 00:10:56,656 and some in-room threats to his privacy, as well. 289 00:10:56,690 --> 00:10:58,658 Buddy, is that schoolwork? 290 00:10:58,692 --> 00:11:00,027 No, we're just right in the middle of this software. 291 00:11:00,060 --> 00:11:01,795 Great, good. Give me the lappy. 292 00:11:01,829 --> 00:11:03,563 I'll hit save for you. I got to Skype with my advisor 293 00:11:03,596 --> 00:11:05,398 in Phoenix, and if I don't get on right now, 294 00:11:05,432 --> 00:11:09,837 he's gonna have to Skype me from a T.G.I. Friday's. 295 00:11:09,870 --> 00:11:11,839 - Oh. - Yeah. 296 00:11:11,872 --> 00:11:13,240 Whew. 297 00:11:13,273 --> 00:11:14,641 'Cause that hurt for a second. 298 00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:16,243 I was like, he wants me to go. 299 00:11:16,276 --> 00:11:18,311 - No, no, no, no, no. - But no. Yeah? No. 300 00:11:18,345 --> 00:11:19,479 - Software. - No. 301 00:11:19,512 --> 00:11:20,748 I mean, yeah, I may need 302 00:11:20,781 --> 00:11:22,916 some privacy, you know, to work on it, 303 00:11:22,950 --> 00:11:27,454 and that might mean... you going. 304 00:11:30,257 --> 00:11:32,059 Oh, you mean here. 305 00:11:32,092 --> 00:11:33,593 Yeah, clearing out. 306 00:11:33,626 --> 00:11:35,228 An hour, here, there. Yes? 307 00:11:35,262 --> 00:11:36,663 Got it. Not a problem. You give me a little 308 00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:38,732 fair warning, I clear right out of here. 309 00:11:38,766 --> 00:11:40,433 Let's schedule it now. We can do it. 310 00:11:40,467 --> 00:11:42,069 I need help with the calendar though. 311 00:11:42,102 --> 00:11:44,571 It's, like, stuck on 2003. 312 00:11:44,604 --> 00:11:46,573 - Help me just break into... - You just hit "today." 313 00:11:46,606 --> 00:11:48,208 - The "today" button. - Sorry. It's stuck in 2003, 314 00:11:48,241 --> 00:11:49,442 so I don't have "today." 315 00:11:49,476 --> 00:11:50,510 I need to jump forward... 316 00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:52,045 No, I know, there's a button 317 00:11:52,079 --> 00:11:53,747 - that says "today." - Yeah, this has no button. 318 00:11:53,781 --> 00:11:54,915 Anyway, you know, I'm just gonna run downstairs 319 00:11:54,948 --> 00:11:55,916 and, uh, grab a bite. 320 00:11:55,949 --> 00:11:58,085 Wait, I want to go. 321 00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:00,888 Let me go. I'll go. I'm hungry. 322 00:12:00,921 --> 00:12:02,923 Come on. 323 00:12:04,291 --> 00:12:05,859 Michael Bluth was fitting right in 324 00:12:05,893 --> 00:12:07,694 with his son's college experience. 325 00:12:07,727 --> 00:12:09,129 Be good for you, huh? 326 00:12:09,162 --> 00:12:11,298 Gettable, right? 327 00:12:11,331 --> 00:12:12,866 Hey, tell me about the software thing. 328 00:12:12,900 --> 00:12:14,567 This is the Faceblock thing you were working on? 329 00:12:14,601 --> 00:12:15,602 Is it like Facebook? 330 00:12:15,635 --> 00:12:17,237 Uh, well, no. 331 00:12:17,270 --> 00:12:18,772 It's kind of the opposite of Facebook, you know. 332 00:12:18,806 --> 00:12:20,774 Facebook connects you with everyone, 333 00:12:20,808 --> 00:12:22,976 this blocks you from everyone. 334 00:12:23,010 --> 00:12:25,445 Oh, okay. Kind of like the antisocial network, right? 335 00:12:25,478 --> 00:12:27,080 - That's very good. - You can use it. 336 00:12:27,114 --> 00:12:28,715 I don't understand the Internet stuff. 337 00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:31,051 You give me all the parts and you tell me to build 338 00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:33,286 a television set, I can bang that out, but I, you know, 339 00:12:33,320 --> 00:12:35,422 I can't get the right day to display on my calendar. 340 00:12:35,455 --> 00:12:37,324 - Just press "today." - Yeah, just tried that. 341 00:12:37,357 --> 00:12:39,126 Doesn't work on mine, pal. 342 00:12:39,159 --> 00:12:41,061 This is very, very, very exciting, you know, 343 00:12:41,094 --> 00:12:44,131 because once they come out with that article on me 344 00:12:44,164 --> 00:12:45,999 in that in-flight magazine, 345 00:12:46,033 --> 00:12:48,301 now, the family's gonna be right back on top. 346 00:12:48,335 --> 00:12:50,570 - The guy's doing a whole spread on me. -In-flight magazine? 347 00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:52,072 Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's called Altitude. 348 00:12:52,105 --> 00:12:53,340 It's for OutWest Airlines. 349 00:12:53,373 --> 00:12:54,574 Next to SkyMall, it's, like, 350 00:12:54,607 --> 00:12:56,109 the number two most read in all of coach. 351 00:12:56,143 --> 00:12:57,677 Well, three with the safety card, 352 00:12:57,710 --> 00:13:00,347 but get a lot of attention for Sudden Valley. 353 00:13:00,380 --> 00:13:02,415 And then with your Internet company, it's gonna be like— 354 00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:04,417 we're gonna have two businesses, you know? 355 00:13:04,451 --> 00:13:05,986 And yours sounds like such a natural. 356 00:13:06,019 --> 00:13:08,155 I mean, no one likes to share their identity. 357 00:13:08,188 --> 00:13:09,456 - Right? - Well... 358 00:13:09,489 --> 00:13:10,623 Okay, give me your meal plan card. 359 00:13:10,657 --> 00:13:12,125 I'm gonna run in there, 360 00:13:12,159 --> 00:13:13,460 I'm gonna grab a tray, you run around back, 361 00:13:13,493 --> 00:13:14,527 make sure you get there in time, 362 00:13:14,561 --> 00:13:15,662 before my hand stamp dries. 363 00:13:15,695 --> 00:13:16,663 Okay? 364 00:13:16,696 --> 00:13:18,598 Here we go. 365 00:13:18,631 --> 00:13:20,633 Michael had a right to be excited. 366 00:13:20,667 --> 00:13:22,970 It had been many years since the Bluth family 367 00:13:23,003 --> 00:13:24,838 had had any business success. 368 00:13:24,872 --> 00:13:29,209 Not since Michael's mother Lucille had sold off a quarter 369 00:13:29,242 --> 00:13:32,445 of the company just before the onset of the great dark period. 370 00:13:32,479 --> 00:13:34,781 But after examining the company's prospects... 371 00:13:34,814 --> 00:13:37,550 Are those police boats? 372 00:13:37,584 --> 00:13:39,319 Lucille 2. 373 00:13:39,352 --> 00:13:40,888 Stan Sitwell quickly divested himself. 374 00:13:40,921 --> 00:13:43,656 How'd you like to be bumped up to Lucille 1? 375 00:13:43,690 --> 00:13:45,558 So the Bluth family had a new stakeholder, 376 00:13:45,592 --> 00:13:48,361 while the old one, who knew she'd be implicated 377 00:13:48,395 --> 00:13:50,163 in some of the family's misdeeds... 378 00:13:50,197 --> 00:13:52,165 You boys know how to shovel coal? 379 00:13:52,199 --> 00:13:55,035 headed out on whatever the opposite of a maiden voyage is. 380 00:13:56,169 --> 00:13:58,538 Michael, however, made a pledge 381 00:13:58,571 --> 00:14:01,241 not to get pulled into the drama 382 00:14:01,274 --> 00:14:04,344 and to let the family keep themselves all together, 383 00:14:04,377 --> 00:14:06,046 - for a while. - ... for a while. 384 00:14:06,079 --> 00:14:08,048 And he set off to sea, even as 385 00:14:08,081 --> 00:14:10,550 his mother mysteriously turned back. 386 00:14:10,583 --> 00:14:13,386 Why the alleged ship-jacker changed direction 387 00:14:13,420 --> 00:14:14,922 is still unexplained. 388 00:14:14,955 --> 00:14:17,424 But what is known is that many of the charges 389 00:14:17,457 --> 00:14:19,893 against this seaward matriarch will fall under 390 00:14:19,927 --> 00:14:23,696 the dominion of the little understood maritime law. 391 00:14:23,730 --> 00:14:25,933 And soon, the hearing drew near... 392 00:14:25,966 --> 00:14:27,534 Well, I missed the hearing. 393 00:14:27,567 --> 00:14:29,169 and then passed. 394 00:14:29,202 --> 00:14:31,038 Oh, it just snuck up on me, and then they called, 395 00:14:31,071 --> 00:14:32,872 and they wanted me there at eight bells. 396 00:14:32,906 --> 00:14:35,342 You know, I thought that was their 5:00 p.m. 397 00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:37,444 By the time I got back, the courtroom was 398 00:14:37,477 --> 00:14:39,379 reverted back to the crab restaurant. 399 00:14:39,412 --> 00:14:40,948 "Eight bells" refers to a watch length. 400 00:14:40,981 --> 00:14:42,382 It's maritime law. 401 00:14:42,415 --> 00:14:44,517 Yes, Michael returned after all. 402 00:14:44,551 --> 00:14:46,453 You know, one bell is struck after 30 minutes, two bells... 403 00:14:46,486 --> 00:14:47,854 It seems Michael had been interested 404 00:14:47,887 --> 00:14:50,557 in maritime law since playing a lawyer 405 00:14:50,590 --> 00:14:52,525 in an original school play 406 00:14:52,559 --> 00:14:55,062 titled The Trial of Captain Hook. 407 00:14:56,829 --> 00:14:58,598 Prior to this, his only dream had been 408 00:14:58,631 --> 00:14:59,967 to possess the power of flight. 409 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:02,535 But that one turned out to be 410 00:15:02,569 --> 00:15:03,971 not as much fun as he thought. 411 00:15:04,004 --> 00:15:06,273 Watch out for the seal! 412 00:15:07,340 --> 00:15:09,109 Loose seal! Loose seal! 413 00:15:09,142 --> 00:15:11,044 I'm watching! 414 00:15:13,746 --> 00:15:15,548 You're out of the play! 415 00:15:15,582 --> 00:15:17,450 That's why, at sea, a watch with no incidents is described as 416 00:15:17,484 --> 00:15:18,885 "eight bells and all is well." 417 00:15:18,918 --> 00:15:21,254 Wow, maybe you should be the maritime lawyer. 418 00:15:21,288 --> 00:15:22,389 This is what I've been saying. 419 00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:23,790 Because I did go to law school 420 00:15:23,823 --> 00:15:25,125 with an emphasis on maritime law. 421 00:15:25,158 --> 00:15:27,127 Oh, your one year of law school 422 00:15:27,160 --> 00:15:28,962 is going to beat Barry's three? 423 00:15:28,996 --> 00:15:30,730 It's ridiculous. 424 00:15:30,763 --> 00:15:31,898 We'll hire the best. 425 00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:32,832 And who's gonna pay 426 00:15:32,865 --> 00:15:34,234 for the best, Mom? 427 00:15:34,267 --> 00:15:35,568 We have money from selling some shares. 428 00:15:35,602 --> 00:15:37,570 Plus, we got that stimulus package. 429 00:15:37,604 --> 00:15:38,805 What are you talking about? 430 00:15:38,838 --> 00:15:40,440 That money is spent. 431 00:15:40,473 --> 00:15:43,610 I just bought 4,000 acres of California desert. 432 00:15:43,643 --> 00:15:44,577 Time-out. 433 00:15:44,611 --> 00:15:45,979 Hang on. 434 00:15:46,013 --> 00:15:47,847 - What's this? - Yeah. 435 00:15:47,880 --> 00:15:50,850 I'm gonna be moving there for a little while. 436 00:15:50,883 --> 00:15:53,653 Old big bear's not gonna be around much anymore. 437 00:15:53,686 --> 00:15:55,622 - I don't care about that. - He's in denial. 438 00:15:55,655 --> 00:15:56,990 - We're getting divorced! - Your mother and I 439 00:15:57,024 --> 00:15:57,991 are getting a divorce. 440 00:16:02,562 --> 00:16:03,430 I want to know... 441 00:16:09,236 --> 00:16:11,104 I want to know about the stimulus package. 442 00:16:11,138 --> 00:16:14,007 You couldn't use any of that money to finish Sudden Valley? 443 00:16:14,041 --> 00:16:15,875 You don't consider that finished? 444 00:16:17,177 --> 00:16:18,778 So the family got a little stimmy. 445 00:16:18,811 --> 00:16:20,613 Don't make a federal case out of it. 446 00:16:20,647 --> 00:16:23,050 That is exactly what they're going to make out of it. 447 00:16:23,083 --> 00:16:24,784 And when you say "family," you mean our family? 448 00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:26,053 They've already got their hooks in it? 449 00:16:26,086 --> 00:16:27,487 Buster, no offense. 450 00:16:27,520 --> 00:16:28,455 None taken. 451 00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:29,989 Oh, I keep losing my jewels. 452 00:16:30,023 --> 00:16:32,292 Michael, you never accept help from anyone. 453 00:16:32,325 --> 00:16:34,394 That's why we didn't cut you in. 454 00:16:34,427 --> 00:16:35,895 We didn't want to demean you. 455 00:16:35,928 --> 00:16:38,198 It's like tipping an African-American. 456 00:16:38,231 --> 00:16:40,667 You wouldn't tip an African-American, would you? 457 00:16:40,700 --> 00:16:42,702 Of course I would. 458 00:16:42,735 --> 00:16:44,904 On a train? 459 00:16:44,937 --> 00:16:46,206 What... 460 00:16:46,239 --> 00:16:48,208 Did you know about all this? 461 00:16:48,241 --> 00:16:50,543 No, I've been tipping them. 462 00:16:50,577 --> 00:16:52,011 Even a waiter? 463 00:16:52,045 --> 00:16:53,980 Okay, the treadmill's up and running. 464 00:16:54,013 --> 00:16:56,149 We got the door on, and we were able 465 00:16:56,183 --> 00:16:58,351 to match the faux on the paint. 466 00:17:02,522 --> 00:17:05,058 Thank you so much for your hard work. 467 00:17:08,961 --> 00:17:11,264 So long. 468 00:17:12,699 --> 00:17:15,268 Michael, we can't give you that money. 469 00:17:15,302 --> 00:17:16,903 We got to keep you clean. 470 00:17:16,936 --> 00:17:18,571 You're the key witness in your mother's trial. 471 00:17:18,605 --> 00:17:19,739 Let me get this straight. 472 00:17:19,772 --> 00:17:21,541 I still have to do all the work 473 00:17:21,574 --> 00:17:24,377 as the president of the company, but I can't use any of the money 474 00:17:24,411 --> 00:17:26,713 for the company, and you won't let me help with your case, 475 00:17:26,746 --> 00:17:28,848 but you'd still like for me to testify at your trial. 476 00:17:28,881 --> 00:17:30,350 Is that right? 477 00:17:30,383 --> 00:17:33,019 I just want you to say I was a loving mother. 478 00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:34,221 And now perjury. 479 00:17:34,254 --> 00:17:35,688 Hey, it wasn't easy to get 480 00:17:35,722 --> 00:17:38,091 Lucille 2 to keep you on as president. 481 00:17:38,125 --> 00:17:40,593 - I'll be sure to thank her. - Don't thank her. 482 00:17:40,627 --> 00:17:42,762 She doesn't have enough shares to stop us. 483 00:17:42,795 --> 00:17:44,731 Hmm. 484 00:17:44,764 --> 00:17:46,766 And that's how Michael found a way 485 00:17:46,799 --> 00:17:47,800 to finish Sudden Valley himself. 486 00:17:47,834 --> 00:17:50,237 - Hello. - Hello. 487 00:17:50,270 --> 00:17:54,441 He simply traded his shares of the Bluth company to Lucille 2. 488 00:17:54,474 --> 00:17:56,143 I hold on to Sudden Valley; it's like a pet project... 489 00:17:56,176 --> 00:17:57,644 - Getting himself out, - Thank you so much. 490 00:17:57,677 --> 00:17:59,646 and giving the balance of power 491 00:17:59,679 --> 00:18:02,815 to a woman who had no power of balance. 492 00:18:02,849 --> 00:18:04,151 Oh. 493 00:18:06,018 --> 00:18:09,222 And for the first time, he didn't feel he needed 494 00:18:09,256 --> 00:18:12,759 to tell his family he was done with them. 495 00:18:12,792 --> 00:18:14,261 But he did anyway. 496 00:18:14,294 --> 00:18:16,663 You know what, I am done with this family. 497 00:18:16,696 --> 00:18:18,165 I hope you've saved some money, 498 00:18:18,198 --> 00:18:20,267 'cause you're gonna need every dime now. 499 00:18:20,300 --> 00:18:21,601 What's this? 500 00:18:21,634 --> 00:18:24,271 And with his newfound wealth, 501 00:18:24,304 --> 00:18:26,739 Michael was not only able to send his son off 502 00:18:26,773 --> 00:18:28,908 - Get out of here! - to a bright future 503 00:18:28,941 --> 00:18:31,444 in college, with the family car... 504 00:18:33,313 --> 00:18:35,014 he was also able to finish 505 00:18:35,047 --> 00:18:38,618 the long-delayed housing development Sudden Valley, 506 00:18:38,651 --> 00:18:43,690 but this time, under his own company name. 507 00:18:43,723 --> 00:18:45,258 Maybe I can give you a tip. 508 00:18:45,292 --> 00:18:46,959 Might want to put a road up to this place. 509 00:18:46,993 --> 00:18:48,528 Well, we paved the neighborhood. 510 00:18:48,561 --> 00:18:50,530 Just waiting for the city to build a road to it. 511 00:18:50,563 --> 00:18:52,965 And although his mother's day in court was something 512 00:18:52,999 --> 00:18:57,103 both he and his college-bound son would miss, 513 00:18:57,136 --> 00:18:59,606 Michael truly felt that nothing could go wrong. 514 00:18:59,639 --> 00:19:02,008 And then something did. 515 00:19:04,076 --> 00:19:06,313 Not that. That happens all the time. 516 00:19:06,346 --> 00:19:07,780 This. 517 00:19:07,814 --> 00:19:10,383 The collapse of the California housing market 518 00:19:10,417 --> 00:19:13,686 is taking a personal toll with cutbacks here at the station. 519 00:19:13,720 --> 00:19:16,155 And since the main Internet and information cable 520 00:19:16,189 --> 00:19:19,792 had been severed when the community pool was installed, 521 00:19:19,826 --> 00:19:23,230 Michael suddenly found himself living in a ghost town 522 00:19:23,263 --> 00:19:25,265 he himself built. 523 00:19:31,003 --> 00:19:33,540 Well, that's not a great sign. 524 00:19:45,285 --> 00:19:47,754 This is why you don't confide in a competitor. 525 00:19:50,890 --> 00:19:52,392 Michael was desperate to cover 526 00:19:52,425 --> 00:19:54,060 his copious building costs... 527 00:19:54,093 --> 00:19:55,328 Just till I get on my feet. 528 00:19:55,362 --> 00:19:56,929 so he returned to a woman 529 00:19:56,963 --> 00:19:59,366 he could count on to put off his downfall. 530 00:19:59,399 --> 00:20:01,200 - I got you! - Just as he could count on 531 00:20:01,234 --> 00:20:03,236 her putting him off and falling down. 532 00:20:03,270 --> 00:20:04,704 You did. Bye-bye. 533 00:20:04,737 --> 00:20:05,905 Oop. 534 00:20:05,938 --> 00:20:08,241 That's a hot mess. 535 00:20:08,275 --> 00:20:09,909 But weeks stretched into months, 536 00:20:09,942 --> 00:20:11,544 and the situation got bleaker. 537 00:20:14,481 --> 00:20:17,417 And it was either this that made him lose hope... 538 00:20:20,253 --> 00:20:21,688 Love each other. 539 00:20:21,721 --> 00:20:23,423 Pete! Pete! 540 00:20:23,456 --> 00:20:26,293 or possibly it was the death of that mailman... 541 00:20:26,326 --> 00:20:27,360 Wait here. 542 00:20:27,394 --> 00:20:28,761 Hang on, Pete! 543 00:20:28,795 --> 00:20:29,729 but Michael finally gave up. 544 00:20:29,762 --> 00:20:30,963 I got one bar! 545 00:20:30,997 --> 00:20:32,799 And having alienated 546 00:20:32,832 --> 00:20:34,301 everyone else in the family, 547 00:20:34,334 --> 00:20:36,569 turned to the one person he had left. 548 00:20:36,603 --> 00:20:40,206 I thought we'd have Thanksgiving here for your senior year. 549 00:20:40,239 --> 00:20:42,809 I don't have a kitchen. 550 00:20:42,842 --> 00:20:44,911 Oh, these are my clothes. 551 00:20:46,012 --> 00:20:48,415 Pete died. 552 00:20:48,448 --> 00:20:50,383 God. 553 00:20:50,417 --> 00:20:54,454 And so Michael moved into his son's college dorm room. 554 00:20:56,489 --> 00:20:57,790 You are kidding me. 555 00:20:57,824 --> 00:20:59,258 They're gonna be in seat backs today? 556 00:20:59,292 --> 00:21:00,259 That is great news. 557 00:21:00,293 --> 00:21:02,128 Which, in the new economy, 558 00:21:02,161 --> 00:21:04,230 wasn't as unusual a phenomenon as you might think. 559 00:21:04,263 --> 00:21:06,098 Don't go through my stuff, Granddad. 560 00:21:06,132 --> 00:21:08,668 Hey, who do you think paid for your stuff? 561 00:21:08,701 --> 00:21:10,737 Excuse me. Sorry. Do you know where George Michael is? 562 00:21:10,770 --> 00:21:12,171 Um, he's in the computer lab. 563 00:21:12,204 --> 00:21:13,840 Great. 564 00:21:13,873 --> 00:21:15,842 - There's a computer lab? - There's a computer lab? 565 00:21:15,875 --> 00:21:16,843 Huh. 566 00:21:16,876 --> 00:21:18,578 I'm putting up a wall. 567 00:21:18,611 --> 00:21:21,013 We need to rework our whole system here. 568 00:21:21,047 --> 00:21:22,982 Sounds like you guys are working on your privacy software, huh? 569 00:21:23,015 --> 00:21:24,317 Hey. How'd you find me? 570 00:21:24,351 --> 00:21:26,285 Uh, Trang's grandfather. 571 00:21:26,319 --> 00:21:29,322 Boy, shoot me if I'm 86, living in my grandson's dorm, huh? 572 00:21:29,356 --> 00:21:31,324 Pal, good news. 573 00:21:31,358 --> 00:21:33,159 The article that they did on me in Altitude magazine 574 00:21:33,192 --> 00:21:34,193 comes out today. 575 00:21:34,226 --> 00:21:36,028 You're in Attitude? 576 00:21:36,062 --> 00:21:37,764 That magazine is gay. 577 00:21:37,797 --> 00:21:40,266 Oh, he wasn't being flip with the word "gay." 578 00:21:40,299 --> 00:21:43,536 Attitude is a British magazine for homosexuals. 579 00:21:43,570 --> 00:21:45,037 Altitude. 580 00:21:45,071 --> 00:21:46,806 It is OutWest Airlines' in-flight magazine. 581 00:21:46,839 --> 00:21:47,840 Can I see it? 582 00:21:47,874 --> 00:21:49,509 Probably doesn't have it. 583 00:21:49,542 --> 00:21:51,678 Try finding a flight at this time of the year. 584 00:21:51,711 --> 00:21:54,347 You ever even been on a plane, you piece of? 585 00:21:55,848 --> 00:21:57,984 So can I see it? 586 00:21:58,017 --> 00:22:01,020 It-it is not in the terrestrial newsstands just yet. 587 00:22:01,053 --> 00:22:02,889 Guess what though. You, my friend, are in the article. 588 00:22:02,922 --> 00:22:04,824 - I'm in it? - You're in it, you're in it. 589 00:22:04,857 --> 00:22:06,893 I mentioned you; I mentioned that I'm living in your dorm. 590 00:22:06,926 --> 00:22:09,195 I thought that it might help with your popularity problem. 591 00:22:09,228 --> 00:22:11,664 Well, I'm gonna get going 592 00:22:11,698 --> 00:22:13,500 - while the room is empty, so... - Okay. Great. 593 00:22:13,533 --> 00:22:15,001 See you later. 594 00:22:15,034 --> 00:22:16,536 Boy, that's got to drive you crazy, right? 595 00:22:16,569 --> 00:22:17,804 The whole reason you had to come 596 00:22:17,837 --> 00:22:19,572 to the computer lab was for privacy. 597 00:22:19,606 --> 00:22:21,974 It's no wonder you can't get a real girl up there. 598 00:22:22,008 --> 00:22:24,411 Michael was referring to something he'd walked in on 599 00:22:24,444 --> 00:22:25,912 a few days earlier. 600 00:22:25,945 --> 00:22:27,380 There's a girl in there. 601 00:22:27,414 --> 00:22:29,749 There is? 602 00:22:29,782 --> 00:22:31,851 Where the hell is George Michael? 603 00:22:31,884 --> 00:22:33,520 - Excuse me. Hello. Oh. - Dad. 604 00:22:33,553 --> 00:22:34,654 - Hi. - Yeah. 605 00:22:34,687 --> 00:22:35,755 There's nobody in here. 606 00:22:35,788 --> 00:22:37,557 Buddy, bad news. 607 00:22:37,590 --> 00:22:39,392 P-Hound is yanking our chain again. 608 00:22:39,426 --> 00:22:41,093 - Uncle Michael. - Oh, my God. 609 00:22:41,127 --> 00:22:42,261 - Hi. - Hello there. 610 00:22:42,294 --> 00:22:45,231 There is a kind of girl here. 611 00:22:45,264 --> 00:22:46,933 Didn't say it was your cousin. 612 00:22:46,966 --> 00:22:48,167 Well, he doesn't know. 613 00:22:48,200 --> 00:22:49,569 Now, that's smart. 614 00:22:49,602 --> 00:22:52,238 Let him think there's a girl in here. 615 00:22:52,271 --> 00:22:54,173 Actually, we've been talking about how crowded that room is, 616 00:22:54,206 --> 00:22:57,844 and P-Hound was suggesting that maybe we, maybe we do a vote 617 00:22:57,877 --> 00:22:59,612 to see who stays in the dorm room. 618 00:22:59,646 --> 00:23:01,414 He suggested that? Are you serious? 619 00:23:01,448 --> 00:23:04,283 Well, the thing is that the room is only sanctioned for two. 620 00:23:04,316 --> 00:23:05,585 Right, and we have a vote. 621 00:23:05,618 --> 00:23:06,919 He's gone in two seconds. 622 00:23:06,953 --> 00:23:08,588 Ah. 623 00:23:08,621 --> 00:23:10,056 Two against one, right? 624 00:23:10,089 --> 00:23:11,924 - Well, actually... - We got to do it. 625 00:23:11,958 --> 00:23:14,461 The thing is that it kind of puts me in an awkward position. 626 00:23:14,494 --> 00:23:16,062 - Hi. - Hey. 627 00:23:16,095 --> 00:23:18,030 Because since there's only three people voting, 628 00:23:18,064 --> 00:23:20,533 everyone's gonna know who voted against who. 629 00:23:20,567 --> 00:23:22,401 Well, what about if your "girlfriend" wants to move in. 630 00:23:22,435 --> 00:23:23,570 That way, she gets a vote. 631 00:23:24,737 --> 00:23:26,138 I'm just here for tutoring. 632 00:23:26,172 --> 00:23:27,740 She's not my girlfriend, she's my cousin. 633 00:23:27,774 --> 00:23:28,808 I'm not attracted to him. 634 00:23:28,841 --> 00:23:30,376 Well, why's that even an issue? 635 00:23:30,409 --> 00:23:32,779 P-Hound doesn't know any of that stuff. Okay? 636 00:23:32,812 --> 00:23:35,582 He'll just think that her vote's the vote that got him out. 637 00:23:35,615 --> 00:23:38,417 Well, wouldn't my girlfriend want to get rid of my father? 638 00:23:38,451 --> 00:23:39,952 - I'm not your girlfriend. - Not your girlfriend. 639 00:23:39,986 --> 00:23:41,888 No, but he doesn't know that. 640 00:23:41,921 --> 00:23:43,456 No, well, someone's got to vote for me, that's right. 641 00:23:43,490 --> 00:23:44,891 Otherwise, it's suspicious. 642 00:23:44,924 --> 00:23:46,559 We don't want a palace coup, right? 643 00:23:46,593 --> 00:23:48,127 - Well, I'll vote you out. - Yeah, I will. 644 00:23:48,160 --> 00:23:49,662 - Happy to do it. - I wouldn't make you do that. 645 00:23:49,696 --> 00:23:51,130 You know, then I fall down a flight of stairs, 646 00:23:51,163 --> 00:23:52,298 I crack my head open, you feel bad 647 00:23:52,331 --> 00:23:53,332 about yourself your whole life. 648 00:23:53,365 --> 00:23:54,834 And perhaps it was the chair 649 00:23:54,867 --> 00:23:56,669 that fooled Michael into thinking 650 00:23:56,703 --> 00:23:58,638 his next idea was a good one. 651 00:23:58,671 --> 00:24:01,508 What if I vote myself out? 652 00:24:01,541 --> 00:24:03,175 You'd do that? 653 00:24:03,209 --> 00:24:04,477 How would that help? 654 00:24:04,511 --> 00:24:06,245 It's simple algebra. 655 00:24:06,278 --> 00:24:08,815 You two vote against P-Hound, nobody knows who did what, 656 00:24:08,848 --> 00:24:10,983 because there's a vote against me in there, 657 00:24:11,017 --> 00:24:13,119 and it's adios, brothiero. 658 00:24:13,152 --> 00:24:14,787 It cannot fail. 659 00:24:14,821 --> 00:24:17,123 Michael was pleased with his plan. 660 00:24:17,156 --> 00:24:18,691 Won't that make it a tie? 661 00:24:18,725 --> 00:24:19,692 Briefly. 662 00:24:19,726 --> 00:24:21,193 Hmm? 663 00:24:21,227 --> 00:24:22,962 I mean, if the two of us vote against P-Hound, 664 00:24:22,995 --> 00:24:24,864 and you and P-Hound vote against you, 665 00:24:24,897 --> 00:24:26,799 then it's two against two, right? 666 00:24:26,833 --> 00:24:29,602 Wow, you think, you think that'd he'd vote against me? 667 00:24:29,636 --> 00:24:31,037 I mean... 668 00:24:31,838 --> 00:24:32,805 Um... 669 00:24:32,839 --> 00:24:34,173 All right, new plan. 670 00:24:34,206 --> 00:24:35,975 The details of the plan 671 00:24:36,008 --> 00:24:37,777 continued to develop through lunch. 672 00:24:37,810 --> 00:24:39,145 So we got two scenarios. 673 00:24:39,178 --> 00:24:41,213 It's either two votes against P-Hound, 674 00:24:41,247 --> 00:24:43,049 one vote against Maeby, one against me, 675 00:24:43,082 --> 00:24:46,452 with that vote being my own; or if it's two votes against me, 676 00:24:46,485 --> 00:24:48,120 then clearly P-Hound is being nasty, 677 00:24:48,154 --> 00:24:50,189 that triggers a recount, and then it's a P-Hound blitz. 678 00:24:50,222 --> 00:24:51,858 We all vote against P-Hound, he's gone. 679 00:24:51,891 --> 00:24:53,125 Mm-hmm. 680 00:24:53,159 --> 00:24:54,794 What if whoever loses... 681 00:24:54,827 --> 00:24:56,062 Yeah? 682 00:24:56,095 --> 00:24:57,997 refuses to go? 683 00:24:58,030 --> 00:25:00,332 You think P-Hound would do that? 684 00:25:00,366 --> 00:25:01,868 Okay, new plan. 685 00:25:01,901 --> 00:25:03,402 And so the planning continued through 686 00:25:03,435 --> 00:25:05,705 what should have been organic chemistry. 687 00:25:05,738 --> 00:25:07,874 We all pack ahead of time, 688 00:25:07,907 --> 00:25:10,643 really pack a bag, so it doesn't look rigged, you know? 689 00:25:10,677 --> 00:25:12,211 And then the loser, straight out the door. 690 00:25:12,244 --> 00:25:13,813 I mean, that's-that's the deal. 691 00:25:13,846 --> 00:25:15,481 You know, that's the cost of having a vote, 692 00:25:15,514 --> 00:25:16,515 that's the price of freedom. 693 00:25:16,549 --> 00:25:18,084 You know, maybe it's... 694 00:25:18,117 --> 00:25:19,518 maybe it's better if we're all just 695 00:25:19,552 --> 00:25:20,887 direct with each other, you know? 696 00:25:20,920 --> 00:25:22,321 Just-just say what's on our minds. 697 00:25:22,354 --> 00:25:24,023 Yeah, I think it's gonna come out anyway. 698 00:25:24,056 --> 00:25:28,394 Um, Dad, you know, I-I've really loved living with you... 699 00:25:28,427 --> 00:25:29,428 No talking. 700 00:25:31,230 --> 00:25:33,265 No talking once the votes come in. 701 00:25:33,299 --> 00:25:35,067 You're just right out the door. That's the missing piece. 702 00:25:35,101 --> 00:25:36,736 That's it. 703 00:25:36,769 --> 00:25:38,537 This plan is foolproof. 704 00:25:38,571 --> 00:25:41,207 Oh, I've cherished this, too, pal. 705 00:25:41,240 --> 00:25:42,875 Yeah. I mean, how many, how many fathers 706 00:25:42,909 --> 00:25:44,777 get to go to college with their kid, huh? 707 00:25:44,811 --> 00:25:46,946 So obviously this is what happened. 708 00:25:46,979 --> 00:25:49,749 Michael read his own vote first. 709 00:25:49,782 --> 00:25:52,885 First vote to remove... 710 00:25:52,919 --> 00:25:54,120 Michael. 711 00:25:54,153 --> 00:25:55,655 Huh, what are you gonna do? 712 00:25:57,123 --> 00:26:00,259 Second vote to remove... 713 00:26:02,294 --> 00:26:04,063 Michael. 714 00:26:04,096 --> 00:26:07,634 Michael expected this, but didn't expect the sting. 715 00:26:07,667 --> 00:26:09,568 Wow. 716 00:26:09,602 --> 00:26:13,239 Obviously, if there's a tie, there's an immediate runoff. 717 00:26:13,272 --> 00:26:15,808 Third vote to remove... 718 00:26:17,176 --> 00:26:19,178 Michael. 719 00:26:25,918 --> 00:26:28,487 Did you mean to write "George Michael"? 720 00:26:28,520 --> 00:26:31,457 Obviously, the verdict was in. 721 00:26:31,490 --> 00:26:33,492 And it's hard to know exactly 722 00:26:33,525 --> 00:26:35,294 why Michael opened the fourth ballot. 723 00:26:35,327 --> 00:26:39,298 Was it out of hope or confusion? 724 00:26:39,331 --> 00:26:42,601 Either way, it couldn't be what he wanted to read. 725 00:27:02,722 --> 00:27:06,192 Michael did the only thing he could think of 726 00:27:06,225 --> 00:27:08,695 that would save face. 727 00:27:28,180 --> 00:27:31,283 Michael had just been stunned by some bad news. 728 00:27:31,317 --> 00:27:33,119 And with nowhere to go, he decided 729 00:27:33,152 --> 00:27:35,888 to pick up a copy of Altitude to lift his spirits. 730 00:27:35,922 --> 00:27:37,523 - Hi. Hello. - Hey. 731 00:27:37,556 --> 00:27:38,958 Where you heading today, sir? 732 00:27:38,991 --> 00:27:40,559 Well, actually, I just wanted a copy 733 00:27:40,592 --> 00:27:42,862 of your in-flight magazine Altitude. 734 00:27:42,895 --> 00:27:44,864 Ah, this is ticketing. 735 00:27:44,897 --> 00:27:47,033 You can get the magazine on the flight. 736 00:27:47,066 --> 00:27:49,736 I get it. But I'm actually— I'm in the magazine. 737 00:27:49,769 --> 00:27:51,337 How many bags? 738 00:27:52,604 --> 00:27:53,740 Oh, I'm not checking these. 739 00:27:53,773 --> 00:27:54,841 Ah, sorry, you actually 740 00:27:54,874 --> 00:27:56,508 can't carry those on board. 741 00:27:56,542 --> 00:27:58,310 Let me start over. 742 00:27:58,344 --> 00:28:00,412 Uh, I-I am the star of Altitude magazine this month— 743 00:28:00,446 --> 00:28:02,314 or quarter, actually. 744 00:28:02,348 --> 00:28:05,017 It's an April-September issue, and I just wanted to get a copy. 745 00:28:05,051 --> 00:28:06,518 I'm not flying anywhere. 746 00:28:06,552 --> 00:28:07,820 Why do you have suitcases? 747 00:28:07,854 --> 00:28:09,155 Those are irrelevant. 748 00:28:09,188 --> 00:28:10,322 Not to me. 749 00:28:10,356 --> 00:28:12,191 Okay. 750 00:28:12,224 --> 00:28:15,227 I was mistakenly voted out of a four-person housing situation, 751 00:28:15,261 --> 00:28:17,930 uh, in a pack-first, no-talking-after scenario. 752 00:28:17,964 --> 00:28:19,398 Does that clear it up for you? 753 00:28:19,431 --> 00:28:21,768 What do you mean by "mistakenly"? 754 00:28:21,801 --> 00:28:24,036 I voted against myself to spare my son the embarrassment 755 00:28:24,070 --> 00:28:27,006 of, of having to vote his own father out of his dorm. 756 00:28:27,039 --> 00:28:28,207 That's all. 757 00:28:28,240 --> 00:28:29,742 But that leaves three other votes. 758 00:28:29,776 --> 00:28:30,943 Yeah. 759 00:28:30,977 --> 00:28:32,779 Can I get a copy of the magazine, please? 760 00:28:32,812 --> 00:28:35,247 No, I'm sorry, they're actually for passengers. 761 00:28:35,281 --> 00:28:36,916 We don't even give out honey nuts, so we're not gonna 762 00:28:36,949 --> 00:28:39,118 - give you a magazine. - Who wants honey nuts? 763 00:28:39,151 --> 00:28:40,419 I don't want the honey nuts. 764 00:28:40,452 --> 00:28:41,587 I want to just jump onto the plane, 765 00:28:41,620 --> 00:28:42,889 - grab a magazine. - Oh, okay, 766 00:28:42,922 --> 00:28:44,356 yeah, sure, we just, uh, let people walk 767 00:28:44,390 --> 00:28:45,792 onto the plane all the time. 768 00:28:45,825 --> 00:28:48,527 Do you want a box cutter also? 769 00:28:48,560 --> 00:28:50,096 - Oh. - Nice. 770 00:28:50,129 --> 00:28:52,031 These guys are jerks. 771 00:28:52,064 --> 00:28:53,265 Take that, take that. 772 00:28:53,299 --> 00:28:55,968 Enjoy. 773 00:28:56,002 --> 00:28:57,303 Tell you what— give me a one-way ticket 774 00:28:57,336 --> 00:28:59,405 to your cheapest destination, please. 775 00:28:59,438 --> 00:29:01,774 Oh, you lucked out. 776 00:29:01,808 --> 00:29:03,742 Today it's Pittsburgh. 777 00:29:03,776 --> 00:29:06,212 He's good. 778 00:29:06,245 --> 00:29:07,914 What's the second cheapest? 779 00:29:07,947 --> 00:29:09,916 So Michael ended up spending a little more 780 00:29:09,949 --> 00:29:11,617 to fly a little less, 781 00:29:11,650 --> 00:29:14,086 and after some confusion at security... 782 00:29:14,120 --> 00:29:15,421 But you've got nothing in your luggage. 783 00:29:15,454 --> 00:29:16,488 I wasn't supposed to be traveling today. 784 00:29:16,522 --> 00:29:18,057 I told you, it was 785 00:29:18,090 --> 00:29:19,158 a voting situation, there was a miscalculation. 786 00:29:19,191 --> 00:29:20,459 Well, I mean, obviously 787 00:29:20,492 --> 00:29:21,994 P-Hound's gonna vote against you. 788 00:29:22,028 --> 00:29:23,729 - I've never seen nothing... - These three people with burkas 789 00:29:23,762 --> 00:29:25,597 just walked right by you. 790 00:29:25,631 --> 00:29:27,834 he found his seat. 791 00:29:27,867 --> 00:29:30,937 Unfortunately the seat he was assigned didn't have 792 00:29:30,970 --> 00:29:32,805 a seat back pocket. 793 00:29:32,839 --> 00:29:35,975 Hello, hi, does each ticket entitle 794 00:29:36,008 --> 00:29:37,676 the passenger to an in-flight magazine? 795 00:29:37,709 --> 00:29:39,278 No, it only guarantees you a seat. 796 00:29:39,311 --> 00:29:41,280 Perhaps I can ask another passenger for one, 797 00:29:41,313 --> 00:29:43,415 or if I'd rather, you can. 798 00:29:43,449 --> 00:29:46,252 Michael had to go back four seats 799 00:29:46,285 --> 00:29:48,687 before someone would. 800 00:29:53,625 --> 00:29:56,362 And Michael kicked himself for a pose 801 00:29:56,395 --> 00:29:59,631 he thought would express humility to Sanjiv, 802 00:29:59,665 --> 00:30:02,501 the Altitude photographer. 803 00:30:02,534 --> 00:30:04,937 And so Michael— 804 00:30:04,971 --> 00:30:07,806 a man who'd for years threatened to leave 805 00:30:07,840 --> 00:30:11,310 his family but had always stayed for his son, 806 00:30:11,343 --> 00:30:15,281 a man who no longer had that excuse nor anywhere to live— 807 00:30:15,314 --> 00:30:17,716 found himself with nothing to lose 808 00:30:17,749 --> 00:30:20,519 in a town that he'd always imagined 809 00:30:20,552 --> 00:30:22,488 would be his destiny, 810 00:30:22,521 --> 00:30:25,992 and for the first time in many years, 811 00:30:26,025 --> 00:30:28,027 Michael had hope. 812 00:30:34,100 --> 00:30:36,235 Michael steps out of the air-conditioned airport. 813 00:30:36,268 --> 00:30:39,305 Hope you know a good place to live because I'm... 814 00:30:39,338 --> 00:30:41,707 Ooh, dear Lord. 815 00:30:41,740 --> 00:30:43,409 'Cause I'm looking 816 00:30:43,442 --> 00:30:45,211 - to make a new start. - Don't touch that handle. 817 00:30:45,244 --> 00:30:46,645 Whoa, Mother of God! 818 00:30:46,678 --> 00:30:48,680 Dear Lord! 819 00:30:48,714 --> 00:30:49,982 Whoo! 820 00:30:50,016 --> 00:30:51,884 And Michael returns 821 00:30:51,918 --> 00:30:55,821 to the only viable place he can think of to live... 822 00:30:55,854 --> 00:30:58,257 Gentlemen, start your engines. 823 00:30:58,290 --> 00:31:01,027 where he begins his new life cleaning up 824 00:31:01,060 --> 00:31:02,995 after his family's old one. 825 00:31:03,029 --> 00:31:04,696 Buster. 826 00:31:04,730 --> 00:31:08,834 No... no, Gob. 827 00:31:08,867 --> 00:31:10,869 Oh! 828 00:31:10,903 --> 00:31:12,871 It was Lindsay.