Who this dude?
Will knows him. He's an investor.
Um, apparently, his family gave out the first loan.
- You don't have to do anything, you know.
He just wants to hang out around you.
Uh-huh.
Remember that weed subscription idea you had?
Oh, yes, yes, yes. Bud of the Month Club.
Strains of the finest cannabis
harvested by real, authentic Mexican hands...
Yeah, you know, you don't need Shark Tank
to pitch that idea, okay?
You have people around you now who can invest in it.
You know, Fernando's a billionaire.
How many billionaires do you know?
Exactly. Just hang out around him, peep some game.
Okay, should I, uh,
- also ask him some stock tips, Earnest?
Uh, maybe ask him to diversify my portfolio?
Alfred, my God,
you must check the Dow industrial Jones average.
- Oh, my God! - It's off the charts,
- I tell you. - The Dow Jones is the way to go.
Hey, guys, this is my white voice.
- Where's the blow at, man? - That's just how you sound.
- You sound exactly like yourself, man. - That's not...
- Okay. - It's not like... Earn can sound like anything.
You guys are bullying him.
You guys, you're bullying him.
- Oh, shit. - Are you making fun of me, too?
They don't really sell like ones we got.
- It's not in that show. - And they ain't got no flavors over here.
- That one is stale. - Is this it?
It's stale as hell, man. I'm, like, "The fuck."
Yeah, it's supposed to be.
No, this ain't the house, man.
This ain't no billionaire house.
This is giving me Tales from the Hood vibes.
Hell yeah.
I'm gonna check it out.
Yeah, you do that.
- What?
Uh... we're here for Will,
for-for... for the party?
'Ere for the do, is it?
Well, don't just stand there like a spare prick at a wedding.
I don't know what you're saying.
Is that Earn I hear?
- Mate! You made it. - Hey.
Come in, guys. Come in. Everyone's in the back.
She coming?
Oh, no, no. She-she works here, yeah.
Oh, mind the glass, yeah?
So, what you up to out here?
- You working with any British artists? - No.
Do you listen to much U.K. rap?
Man, I can't understand
what y'all saying half the time, so, no.
Yeah, yeah.
Uh, thank God for mumble rap.
Really gave us a leg up.
Any, uh, U.K. artists we should be listening to?
- Uh, have you heard Slowthai?
- No. - No.
Uh, K-Trap? He's pretty dope.
- Mm-mm. - No.
Um, 21 Savage?
- Yeah, we know 'em. - Yeah.
- Oh. - Oh, shit!
All right, this-- see, this is a billionaire house, man.
What was that raggedy-ass shit back there?
Oh, no, you're thinking about it wrong.
That was a decoy house.
Ooh. Now, you see, that's hard as fuck, man.
- Bruh. - Oh, wow.
- Bruh. - They got their own Nando's.
They got their own Nando's, man. Like, what the fuck?
Thank you.
Is she one of yours?
Oh. Uh, no, no. She's-she's a friend, uh...
Her-her name's Van. She's not an artist.
So, um, how's your wife?
I'm sorry. I can't remember her name.
Adrian. She's good, yeah.
Yeah, um, we got divorced, actually.
Oh, no. I'm-I'm sorry, man.
Oh, she fancies girls now.
Bit of a hard time for me, that.
Yeah. You all right?
- Oh, it's all behind me now. I'm good. - You sure?
I got my mates. I'm seeing a new bird.
And I'm renting some space in the house right now
'cause I've got this young street artist from Tooting.
He's around here somewhere.
Oh, man, I would love for you to meet this guy.
- Seriously. - Yeah, yeah, that sounds dope.
I'd love to meet him. That sounds cool.
- Great. - Uh, Van?
You want to meet this, um... this artist guy?
Yeah, sure.
- That was Nando's. - Yeah.
All right, can I get four boneless chicken thighs?
- Mm-hmm. Yeah. - What you want?
- Oh, just a burger. - Okay.
- That's chicken thighs there. - Ooh, it's ready to go.
- And here's your burger. - Thank you.
Um, it's free so you don't have to pay anything.
Yeah, thanks.
Okay. Bitch, I know it's free.
- I don't pay for Nando's.
In somebody house?
Mm. Oh, look, at the book collection.
That's hard as fuck.
I hope you weren't put off
by my neighbors.
I've found my lifestyle attracts
unwanted attention.
I've had to find creative ways to protect myself.
Mm.
Welcome. I'm Fernando.
Oh, man. Al, man.
Hey, are you...? Are you the-the Nando Nando?
No. No.
- Hmm. - Me-- I just like the Peri-Peri sauce.
- They told me
this was the only way to get it whenever I want.
That's hard.
I don't leave this property often, but
- I still manage to enjoy life's small pleasures. - Mm.
I just bring them to me.
- Hey, man, say less. Oh.
Good sirs,
I'm going to go get a drink
and also find the bathroom you don't want nobody to use.
Toodle-oo.
I hope I'm not too presumptuous in asking you this, but, um,
do you like... trees?
Does a frog bump his ass when it hop?
Fuck yeah, I like trees.
- Come. Come with me this way.
Shit. Fucking love this place.
Oh.
What do you think?
I mean, that's a... real-ass tree right there, man.
Right? This is one of the oldest trees in London.
I had the whole place built around it.
Yeah. Whitest shit I ever heard.
Hey, man, is it... is it cool if I smoke, dawg?
Whoa, whoa, actually, there's no smoking out here.
It's not good for the tree, huh?
Nope. Uh, yup.
That's a fucking tree.
Hey, these all your friends, man?
Yeah, in a manner of speaking.
People come in and out as they please.
I used to keep this place to myself,
but one day I realized
I could be using my abundant resources
to bring people together,
rather than shutting them out.
Now, I open my doors
to influential people from around the world
in hopes of fostering meaningful exchange of ideas.
Ideas that can maybe...
change the world for the better.
It's cool.
But we mostly drink
and relax in the spa and gamble.
What kind of gambling y'all do over here, man?
We got poker upstairs.
You can smoke up there.
Well, shit. Why you ain't start with that, Nando, man?
- Got me out here looking at a tree and shit.
Excuse me.
Yes.
Oh! Bad decision.
Mm-mm.
Oh, yeah.
Hey, um, excuse me. Just, uh...
Oh, I'm sorry, no.
Yeah, I'm actually in a relationship?
- Oh. - Yeah.
- Congrats. Cool. - Thanks. Yeah.
Um, could-could you pass me the gin right behind you, please?
Oh, my God, I am so sorry.
- I... I just... I thought... - Oh.
- Oh, you thought...? - Yeah. Yeah.
- No. - I'm so sorry.
- No, no, it's fine. - I...
Um, I get hit on by Black men a lot, so...
- Word? - Yeah, um,
I lived in Los Angeles for, like, a minute.
- Mm-hmm. - Black guys love Asian women.
- So... - Hmm.
Well, it seems like a good...
- good cultural exchange, actually. - Mm-hmm.
You know, you guys love hip-hop. We like anime.
- Yes. - So it's, like, a cultural experience.
- That's so true. Um, I'm MK. - Mm-hmm.
- Darius. - You know, you're funny, Darius.
It was so nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.
Yo, man. I heard what that woman said.
That's fucked up.
Oh, that? I mean, that's lightweight. It's...
- I mean, it's... - Well, yeah, bro, don't worry. I got you.
My name's Socks, by the way.
Sox? Like... like S-O-X?
No.
Darius.
Yep.
- It's a nice party. - Yeah, man.
Wow. Your hairline's intense, bro.
- That's-that's intense.
Yeah, man, I'm losing my hair.
- Yeah. - But I'm afraid of what
it'll look like if I shave it all off.
I don't know.
Maybe I got the juice to pull it off. What'd you think?
Mm, I don't know. I feel like, um,
that's more easily pulled off by white men
that are assumed to be dangerous, right?
Like, uh, Jason Statham; like, uh,
Bruce Willis, The Rock.
Um, same reason why Black dudes can do it, as well.
Um, but I feel like you...
The best hope for you is probably, like, Moby.
- Yeah. - But, you know...
Everybody hates Moby.
- Yeah, man. - Yeah, it's true. Yeah.
- A shot? - Yeah, sure.
I kind of like Moby.
All right, TJ?
- TJ?
Um, there's someone I'd like for you to meet.
Uh, this is TJ. TJ, this is Earn and Vanessa.
Hello, people of color.
- Hey. - Hey.
So Earn here, uh, works with Paper Boi.
Paper Boi?
Yeah.
- Oh. - You a musician?
Oh, man, I mean, I do whatever.
Look around, bro. It's all me.
Self-taught multi-hyphenate.
- Got my fingers in all the pies, bro. - Yeah?
Do you, uh, do you guys want to see my installations?
- Yeah, yeah, that'd be great. - Cool.
This piece has such a deep, deep sadness about it.
- Yeah, it's sad.
Alfred, I'd like you
to meet my close friends Bruce and Yonathan.
- What's up, y'all? - Hey, hey. - Hey, guys.
Okay.
- Hmm?
Well, cheeky, can I, um... can I get a toke?
Yeah. Yeah, man.
- Yeah. All right. - Great.
- I got you, man. - Been a while.
- There's no tobacco in there? - No.
- You smoke it straight? - Hell yeah.
- You madman.
Oh.
And it's 25 buy-in with a buy-in
starting a thousand to two thousand.
What?
- Alfred, is it? - Yeah, man. Al or
- you can call me Paper Boi, whichever. - Ah. See. the buy-in
is at 20 thousand.
Oh, man.
My bad.
My bad. I guess I'll just throw that in the pot.
Okay, let's see. I got five.
- Ten. 15,000. - My God. Yeah.
20,000. Hey, that good?
- Let's see here, let's just do that right.
So, what do you think?
Uh, he definitely has a lot of ideas.
Hey. So, I've been renting this space off Fernando
for about four months.
You know, buying supplies. I've dropped about 500K.
You spent half a mil on that kid?
Yeah, I'm in deep, which is why
I wanted to run something by you.
Um, TJ's got this idea to turn this space into
a place for artists passing through town.
So instead of, like, wasting time looking
for a place to stay, and studio space,
artists can stay and work here free of charge.
- And you'd be paying for all that? - Yeah.
Is that crazy? I... You know,
I get excited about ideas, and, you know,
my wife was a voice of reason-- my ex-wife.
Um, so I'm just looking for some perspective.
Okay.
- Um... - I mean, it's got potential, right?
If I'm being honest, uh, it-it sounds really expensive,
- and it's not really... - Uh, let me, uh,
just stop you right there.
Um, he didn't explain it right, so, I'll explain it to you.
My vision is to turn this place
into, like, an influencer incubator.
Okay? All the equipment costs,
the food, the laundry, the...
the drugs. The-the sweets, right?
We can make all that back through subscriptions.
To what?
The art.
Oh. Oh.
- Yeah, yeah. - Yeah, yeah.
Will-- he just always forgets that part.
Ah.
- So, this sounds good, right? - Yeah.
Uh, yeah, just-just let me think about it.
No, but I don't... I don't understand. Like,
if it makes sense, what is there to think about?
I just have to make sure
that Doja Cat isn't doing this same thing,
'cause I heard her camp is doing something
very similar to this, that I just...
I want to make sure that it's not stepping on that, you know?
- Oh, right. - So let me just... let me just think about it
- for a little bit, all right? - Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Cool, cool. - Yeah, yeah, def-definitely.
- Yeah, um... yeah. - Just think about it.
Um, I'll think about it.
- And I'm home alone and scared shitless.
- So what do I do? I try
to sound really mean. I yell out, "Who's there?
- Show yourself at once!"
But I hear nothing. The house is dead silent.
Then I see it.
A pale-skinned Black man,
stick thin, completely naked.
He was soaking wet, shivering,
like he'd just come in from it pissing outside.
Hold up, man. Hold up.
So, um, you're telling me there was a... a wet,
ashy, naked nigga that broke into your house, right?
Hey, how he went in ashy, man?
But what you do?
I got a lot of motherfucking questions, Fernando.
- I'm sorry, man. It's...
Uh, yeah, I'm gonna raise.
- You're right.
That's exactly what I was thinking.
Because, Alfred, it wasn't raining outside.
All the windows and doors were locked.
The security alarm never even tripped.
That's when I realized...
it was a ghost.
Nah.
Mm-mm.
What'd you do?
I did what any man in my position would do.
He fucked it.
- Get the fuck... Man!
- You fuck a ghost! - No, no, no.
The connection we shared wasn't physical.
It was much, much deeper than that.
That spirit came to me. It chose me.
It cleansed me.
And when I woke up, he was gone.
But I was covered in a layer of ectoplasm.
You mean semen, right?
- Se...
The spirit came on you, my nigga.
- That's a bust-and-run where I'm from.
All in.
What, you don't believe in ghosts?
Man, I ain't really ever thought about it that much.
You know what I'm saying? So...
Well, you must believe in God, yeah?
I mean, yeah.
Yeah.
And if you believe in God,
you have to believe in the devil.
There's good and bad spirits everywhere, Alfred.
Why do you think there's so much killing in the world?
Why do you think I have so much money?
The devil is just as powerful as God.
Everything's just looking for balance.
Well, God must be looking out for me, 'cause...
four aces. Oh!
- Yes!
See, I know what you sayin' right there.
I know what that means.
Well played, Alfred.
Hey, that was a good game, Fernando. Look,
balance is a motherfucker.
Yeah.
Well, you cleaned me out.
Hey, I ain't clean you out
like that ghost did.
He going to get my money, right?
Uh, I'm going to go check on my wife downstairs.
Hey, can you check...
Girl, what the fuck?! Hey!
Bitch, what the fuck is wrong...
So you work with Paper Boi, yeah?
Uh... yes, I do.
Nah. Is he here?
- Yeah. - Cheers. We should link, man.
I just did four stops in Europe with Rihanna.
- Oh, really? - Yeah.
Oh. I should intro you guys.
He's around here somewhere.
Is this the guy?
Man, we heard what that woman said to you.
- What do you mean? - Hey.
You don't have to tell them about the racism, man.
I got you. Yeah?
- Oh... - Nah, nah, I got you.
Honestly, it was the most fucked up thing.
Some real Twelve Years a Slave shit.
- Oh, my God. - What?
Um, I don't know.
What are you-- What are you talking about?
Hey, you seen Van?
She's been acting weird.
I've been trying to keep an eye on her.
- Where's your hat?
How much he owe you?
- Forty. - Forty? That's it?
He probably don't have that much on him.
His ass can write a check.
Who writes checks?
Maybe he don't plan on paying me back.
He didn't make no arrangements. I ain't got this man's number.
Man, I may never see this nigga again.
But that's all right, though.
I'm gonna keep a bill, man.
'Cause if this was Atlanta, nigga, mm, fuck.
On sight with that nigga.
Hmm.
You should have seen him, too, man.
He was just sitting over there, smoking a cigar
and shit, smiling, looking at me,
talking about fucking some Black ghost.
- What? - How I'm supposed to handle this, man?
Is this some London shit?
Is this what rich white niggas do over here?
'Cause from where I'm sitting, this is disrespect, man.
I need to at least knock this nigga out,
steal some of his furniture or some shit, fuck his wife.
I don't know. Shit. Fuck!
- Let me talk to Will. - Nah, man.
It's between me and Fernando.
Hey, man, I'm going through the same thing.
You know that kid TJ, the artist?
His art sucks.
But I think he knows that,
and he's taking advantage of Will.
And in the long run, that's just gonna make it harder for me
and other Black kids who are actually talented.
- I don't know what to do. - Yeah, but he Black, though.
That don't mean I gotta help him, right?
I mean, yeah, he's Black, but he's still scamming.
Yeah, but so? White kids be scamming all the fucking time.
- Hell you think TikTok is?
Shit, Black kids need to scam more.
Say, swell, that's Paper Boi.
Hi, man. What's good, B?
Damn, them skates fye, bruh.
Aw, come on, my man. You know the vibes.
Hey, yo, brother.
Um... I just want to thank you in advance, man.
I mean, we both know how this needs to go, right?
If this fool wants to pay for the culture, then let him.
I see how these white folks are all the time, man.
What's wrong with me just showing them who I am?
- Hey, man, you live here? - Yeah.
So you know Fernando, then.
We was playing a poker game, and he went up to his bedroom.
When the fuck is he coming back?
Oh, man.
I hate to tell it to you, but that nigga
is not coming back down.
You see what I'm talk-- I'm tired of this shit,
man, I'm gonna beat this British nigga's ass
is what the fuck I'm gonna do.
Fernando!
Mm.
So nice to meet you.
Sorry.
Do you need any help?
What happened? Are you okay?
Yeah. It's a party, and things happen.
Relax.
I'm just having fun.
Okay.
- Are you mad at me? - What?
- Why would I be mad at you? - I don't know.
You know, I talked to your mom.
She said Lottie's good, but she's worried about you.
Honestly, I'm worried about you, too.
You-you seem like, um...
Earn, I'm fine.
I'm just taking some time for myself.
- I can't have a vacation? - No, you can have a vacation.
- That's fine.
- Good. I'm-I'm glad. - Mm-hmm.
You deserve it.
Thank you.
Well, um, if you need anything, you know, like,
you need me to get you, like...
a place, or some money, or, like,
you want me to call you a car at any time?
I'm not Alfred. I'm okay.
Yeah, I... I'm... I know.
- I know. It's your job. - I'm s... I'm sorry.
It's a bad habit now.
That's okay.
You're so in your head.
I think you need to live in the moment more.
It's okay.
I'm gonna get another drink. Mm!
And he's just like, "I'm here with Paper Boi." Yeah?
Like, "What's the problem?"
And then she's like, "All lives matter,
- that's the problem."
I'm not okay.
I don't know how you're okay.
Wait. I mean, it didn't go down like that.
- I'm fine.
It was not that big a deal.
Why is she crying? Okay.
Where is she?
I mean, I've never even met this girl,
but she's definitely a cunt.
Yo, Darius, I just want you to meet my fiancé.
That's her, man.
What are you coming back in here for,
- being all racist? - You're fucking sick.
- Coming back here...
Why would you even come back?
- You're just a bloody fascist!
It's one of them ones.
But you know what that is, yeah?
That's ultimate white guilt.
I thought racism wasn't really a thing here, like that.
I thought it was more about class.
Racism and capitalism, hard to separate, isn't it?
- Hmm.
Yeah, because something only has value
if, uh, something else has less value.
Yeah, I feel like anywhere you can buy a can of Coke,
some type of racism's going down there.
Hmm.
What about Taco Bell? Does that...
No, they only do Pepsi.
Pepsi, that's...
- No racism. - That's right.
- Damn.
Hey, Fernando!
Hey, I just want my money, Fernando.
Come on, man, stop playing.
Fernando!
Give me my motherfucking money, Fernando!
Oh, okay, yeah.
Fernando, you sleeping?
Fernando, you asleep? You asleep?
All right, I got a lullaby for your ass, nigga.
There he is.
So did you hear back from Doja Cat's people?
Yeah, yeah, should be all good,
but, um, something a little more troubling came up.
Oh?
Yeah, the more I thought about it, the more I realized
TJ needs a manager.
you know, with...
you know, the U.K./U.S. crossover,
someone like him really needs somebody
to curate the beginning of his career.
I totally understand. Yeah.
How much is a manager?
In the U.S., about 30%.
But I'd do it for 25, because we're friends.
Oh. Does that sound good to you, TJ?
- TJ? - Yeah.
That sounds great. Uh...
But we're probably gonna need a lot more money, right?
- Fair. - Yeah.
We're in business, boys.
Hey, Earn.
Hey. Uh...
Oh, this is Socks.
Hey, Sox. Like S-O-X?
No.
Um, Earn, I think we should get going.
It's getting a little, uh, intense upstairs.
I want...
my fucking money, Nando!
Oh, you awake? You awake now, right, nigga?
You awake!
You heard the chainsaw alarm, right, nigs?
Well, fuck your tree! Fuck your tree!
Yeah, can I get a car to 61 Vessel Road?
Four people. How fast can you get here?
Darius.
I heard what my fiancée said to you.
I am so incredibly sorry. I-I am so embarrassed.
Your fiancée?
No, the wedding is off.
- Her mum can rot in North Korea for all I care. - Oh...
Racialism drives me fucking mad!
I got a present for your ass, bitch!
Yo, we'll-we'll...
I ain't leaving here emptyhanded. Fuck that shit.
Oh.
- All this shit free any goddamn way.
You ain't missing shit. Give me this shit.
The fuck y'all looking at? Let's go.
MK?
Oh, no, man, not our problem, man, not our problem.
Go, go, go, go, go!
Thanks for the Nando's, bitch!
Oh, shit.
I took so much Nando's, though!
Oh, you forgot your hat, man.
Come on. Hey, I know a place.