1 00:00:03,303 --> 00:00:04,775 You know who's got to be the bravest person 2 00:00:04,845 --> 00:00:05,906 in the Marvel Universe? 3 00:00:05,906 --> 00:00:09,179 Whoever has to give She-Hulk a bikini wax. 4 00:00:10,090 --> 00:00:11,492 You want to talk brave, 5 00:00:11,492 --> 00:00:14,895 how about Captain America's undocumented Mexican gardener? 6 00:00:15,966 --> 00:00:17,267 He's not braver than 7 00:00:17,267 --> 00:00:19,740 whoever uses the bathroom after The Thing? 8 00:00:20,741 --> 00:00:22,993 As usual, you're all wrong. 9 00:00:22,993 --> 00:00:24,915 The bravest person in the Marvel Universe 10 00:00:24,915 --> 00:00:28,158 is the doctor who gives Wolverine his prostate exam. 11 00:00:29,319 --> 00:00:30,691 How about the guy who gets 12 00:00:30,691 --> 00:00:32,693 a prostate exam from Wolverine? 13 00:00:32,693 --> 00:00:34,935 Now you're just being silly. 14 00:00:35,836 --> 00:00:36,967 Wolverine's never displayed 15 00:00:36,977 --> 00:00:38,539 the slightest interest in helping others 16 00:00:38,539 --> 00:00:40,310 prevent prostate cancer. 17 00:00:44,254 --> 00:00:45,986 Hello. 18 00:00:45,986 --> 00:00:47,558 Yes, the elevator's out of order; 19 00:00:47,558 --> 00:00:49,259 you'll have to use the stairs. 20 00:00:50,370 --> 00:00:51,371 Of course you can. 21 00:00:51,371 --> 00:00:53,634 Pizza dates back to the 16th century, 22 00:00:53,644 --> 00:00:57,007 while the first elevator was not installed until 1852. 23 00:00:57,017 --> 00:00:59,680 That means that for over 300 years, 24 00:00:59,680 --> 00:01:02,292 people carried pizzas up stairs. 25 00:01:02,292 --> 00:01:04,394 Be part of that proud tradition. 26 00:01:06,066 --> 00:01:09,399 I'll go get Penny while that guy spits on our food. 27 00:01:11,241 --> 00:01:13,744 Do you think they gave Wolverine an adamantium prostate? 28 00:01:13,744 --> 00:01:16,517 That's a stupid question. 29 00:01:16,517 --> 00:01:17,658 We're having a conversation about 30 00:01:17,658 --> 00:01:20,290 probing the heinies of superheroes. 31 00:01:20,290 --> 00:01:22,833 There are no stupid questions. 32 00:01:29,490 --> 00:01:30,410 Yes? 33 00:01:30,410 --> 00:01:32,813 Oh, um, is Penny here? 34 00:01:32,813 --> 00:01:34,785 You're Leonard, right? 35 00:01:34,785 --> 00:01:37,528 Yeah. 36 00:01:37,528 --> 00:01:39,930 Damn, it's good to finally meet you, son. 37 00:01:41,031 --> 00:01:43,153 Okay, I think a bit of context here might help. 38 00:01:43,153 --> 00:01:45,245 Oh, hey, Leonard. I see you met my dad. 39 00:01:45,245 --> 00:01:46,827 Oh, good. 40 00:01:46,827 --> 00:01:48,018 Context. 41 00:01:48,018 --> 00:01:49,249 Come on in, buddy. 42 00:01:49,249 --> 00:01:50,250 Take a load off. 43 00:01:50,250 --> 00:01:51,652 Oh, gee, Dad, Leonard can't stay. 44 00:01:51,652 --> 00:01:53,123 He just dropped by to say hello. 45 00:01:53,123 --> 00:01:54,154 Thanks for stopping by, sweetie. 46 00:01:54,164 --> 00:01:56,126 I'll see you later. 47 00:01:57,898 --> 00:01:59,099 Bye. 48 00:02:03,914 --> 00:02:06,697 That was odd. 49 00:02:32,402 --> 00:02:34,424 Are you sure you have enough comics? 50 00:02:34,515 --> 00:02:37,087 You're going to be monitoring the telescope for 12 hours, 51 00:02:37,087 --> 00:02:38,989 and by my estimate, you've only selected 52 00:02:38,989 --> 00:02:41,131 seven hours of reading material. 53 00:02:41,131 --> 00:02:42,803 That's even factoring in 54 00:02:42,803 --> 00:02:45,435 your difficulty in parsing American comic book idioms 55 00:02:45,435 --> 00:02:47,908 like "Bamf!" and "Snikt!" 56 00:02:47,908 --> 00:02:49,780 Is that racist? 57 00:02:49,780 --> 00:02:51,411 It feels racist. 58 00:02:51,421 --> 00:02:53,784 Don't be oversensitive. 59 00:02:53,784 --> 00:02:56,797 He's calling you illiterate, not your race. 60 00:02:56,797 --> 00:02:59,730 Oh, okay. Good. 61 00:02:59,730 --> 00:03:01,101 I don't need more comics. 62 00:03:01,101 --> 00:03:03,073 Howard's gonna stop by, we're gonna play 63 00:03:03,073 --> 00:03:05,946 Intergalactic Battleship and Indian Monopoly. 64 00:03:05,946 --> 00:03:08,719 I don't care for novelty editions of Monopoly. 65 00:03:08,719 --> 00:03:12,192 I prefer the classics: regular and Klingon. 66 00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:14,665 Actually, Indian Monopoly's 67 00:03:14,665 --> 00:03:16,897 just like regular, except the money's in rupees, 68 00:03:16,897 --> 00:03:20,140 instead of hotels you build call centers, 69 00:03:20,140 --> 00:03:23,844 and when you pick a Chance card, you might die of dysentery. 70 00:03:24,615 --> 00:03:26,306 Just FYI, 71 00:03:26,306 --> 00:03:27,558 that was racist. 72 00:03:29,640 --> 00:03:32,152 You'll never guess what just happened. 73 00:03:32,152 --> 00:03:33,834 You went out in the hallway, 74 00:03:33,834 --> 00:03:35,776 stumbled into an interdimensional portal 75 00:03:35,776 --> 00:03:37,908 which brought you 5,000 years into the future, 76 00:03:37,908 --> 00:03:39,950 where you took advantage of the advanced technology 77 00:03:39,950 --> 00:03:42,252 to build a time machine, and now you're back 78 00:03:42,252 --> 00:03:44,505 to bring us all with you to the year 7010 79 00:03:44,505 --> 00:03:46,797 where we are transported to work at the Thinkatorium 80 00:03:46,797 --> 00:03:50,200 by telepathically controlled flying dolphins? 81 00:03:51,842 --> 00:03:53,403 No. 82 00:03:53,403 --> 00:03:55,145 Aw. 83 00:03:55,976 --> 00:03:57,978 Penny kissed me. 84 00:03:57,988 --> 00:04:00,050 Well, who would ever guess that? 85 00:04:00,791 --> 00:04:02,362 What-what kind of a kiss? 86 00:04:02,362 --> 00:04:04,194 A big kiss. On the mouth. 87 00:04:04,194 --> 00:04:06,567 Is it possible that she was going for your cheek 88 00:04:06,567 --> 00:04:09,269 and you moved and she accidentally got lip? 89 00:04:09,269 --> 00:04:12,713 That happens with me and my mom all the time. 90 00:04:13,984 --> 00:04:15,345 She introduced me to her father, 91 00:04:15,355 --> 00:04:17,858 kissed me and then shut the door in my face. 92 00:04:17,858 --> 00:04:20,230 Maybe she was trying to send you a message. 93 00:04:20,230 --> 00:04:21,291 You think? 94 00:04:21,301 --> 00:04:22,753 Yeah. "This man is not my father. 95 00:04:22,753 --> 00:04:24,234 "I'm being held hostage. 96 00:04:24,234 --> 00:04:25,435 "So I'm going to do 97 00:04:25,435 --> 00:04:26,877 "something insane in the hopes 98 00:04:26,877 --> 00:04:28,979 that you'll call 911." 99 00:04:28,979 --> 00:04:30,781 Penny kissing me is not insane. 100 00:04:30,781 --> 00:04:32,623 She used to kiss me all the time. 101 00:04:32,623 --> 00:04:35,556 Einstein defined insanity as "doing the same thing 102 00:04:35,556 --> 00:04:38,929 over and over again and expecting different results." 103 00:04:39,470 --> 00:04:40,501 By that standard, 104 00:04:40,501 --> 00:04:42,673 Penny is cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs. 105 00:04:43,644 --> 00:04:45,295 I'm just saying, 106 00:04:45,295 --> 00:04:47,297 it felt like it may have meant something. 107 00:04:47,297 --> 00:04:49,089 Ah, this takes me back. 108 00:04:49,089 --> 00:04:50,551 Leonard obsessing about Penny. 109 00:04:50,551 --> 00:04:53,293 I mean, don't get me wrong, I love your new stuff, 110 00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:55,896 but once in a while it's nice to hear the hits. 111 00:04:55,896 --> 00:04:57,137 Ooh, ooh! 112 00:04:57,137 --> 00:05:01,011 Do "Our babies will be smart and beautiful." 113 00:05:02,342 --> 00:05:05,195 That one always makes me laugh. 114 00:05:07,417 --> 00:05:09,289 Why do I bother talking to you people? 115 00:05:09,289 --> 00:05:11,532 If it'll make you feel better, we rarely listen. 116 00:05:11,532 --> 00:05:14,104 Hey, can I talk to you out here for a sec? 117 00:05:14,104 --> 00:05:15,365 Yeah, sure. 118 00:05:16,877 --> 00:05:20,180 I'm starting to think we're never going to see that pizza. 119 00:05:21,281 --> 00:05:23,734 So you're probably wondering what that was all about. 120 00:05:23,734 --> 00:05:25,756 What, uh, the kissing and everything? 121 00:05:25,756 --> 00:05:29,219 Nah, women do that to me all the time. 122 00:05:29,219 --> 00:05:31,051 Yeah, okay. The thing is, I kind of 123 00:05:31,051 --> 00:05:32,943 told my father we got back together again. 124 00:05:32,943 --> 00:05:34,905 What? Why? 125 00:05:34,915 --> 00:05:36,046 Well, you're the first guy 126 00:05:36,046 --> 00:05:37,618 he's ever really approved of, you know? 127 00:05:37,618 --> 00:05:39,069 You're a scientist who went to college 128 00:05:39,069 --> 00:05:40,791 and you don't have a neck tattoo 129 00:05:40,791 --> 00:05:45,466 or outstanding warrants or... or a baby. 130 00:05:45,466 --> 00:05:49,169 What kind of guys did you used to go out with? 131 00:05:49,169 --> 00:05:51,041 Just guys. 132 00:05:51,041 --> 00:05:53,433 Anyway, when I told him we split up, he was heartbroken, 133 00:05:53,433 --> 00:05:55,085 and he kept bugging me: "How's Leonard? 134 00:05:55,085 --> 00:05:56,757 "Why can't you get back together with Leonard? 135 00:05:56,757 --> 00:05:59,980 I bet Leonard never tipped a cow over on himself." 136 00:06:01,091 --> 00:06:02,453 So to get him off my back, 137 00:06:02,453 --> 00:06:04,034 I told him we worked things out. 138 00:06:04,034 --> 00:06:06,206 Really? 139 00:06:09,510 --> 00:06:11,812 How-how'd we manage that? 140 00:06:11,822 --> 00:06:13,023 What? 141 00:06:13,023 --> 00:06:15,355 I mean, did you apologize? 142 00:06:15,355 --> 00:06:16,957 Did you have to woo me? 143 00:06:17,968 --> 00:06:20,150 Get over yourself. 144 00:06:20,150 --> 00:06:22,372 I whistled, you came running. 145 00:06:22,372 --> 00:06:25,175 Yeah, no, I don't think so. 146 00:06:25,175 --> 00:06:26,617 Okay, why are you arguing about this? 147 00:06:26,617 --> 00:06:27,578 I'm just saying, 148 00:06:27,578 --> 00:06:29,019 if we fake got back together, 149 00:06:29,019 --> 00:06:30,751 that's totally not how it fake happened. 150 00:06:30,751 --> 00:06:31,752 Oh... 151 00:06:31,762 --> 00:06:32,963 Okay, whatever. 152 00:06:32,963 --> 00:06:34,665 Will you please just play along until my dad leaves? 153 00:06:34,665 --> 00:06:36,216 Hold on, you actually want me 154 00:06:36,216 --> 00:06:38,469 to deceive your father with some sort of 155 00:06:38,469 --> 00:06:40,010 sham play acting and kissing? 156 00:06:40,010 --> 00:06:42,172 'Cause I'm good with that. 157 00:06:43,243 --> 00:06:45,445 Penny, you out here? 158 00:06:51,532 --> 00:06:53,704 Come on, honey, not in front of my dad. 159 00:06:53,704 --> 00:06:57,387 Relax, I've seen you do a lot worse with a lot stupider. 160 00:06:57,387 --> 00:06:59,429 See? 161 00:06:59,429 --> 00:07:00,761 He doesn't mind. 162 00:07:00,761 --> 00:07:01,932 So, Leonard, I'm taking your gal out 163 00:07:01,932 --> 00:07:03,484 for a steak dinner; you want to join us? 164 00:07:03,484 --> 00:07:05,576 Oh, Dad, that's nice, but Leonard has to work. 165 00:07:05,576 --> 00:07:06,497 Right, Leonard? 166 00:07:06,497 --> 00:07:07,998 Uh, I do, I have to work. 167 00:07:07,998 --> 00:07:09,730 But I'm gonna blow that off to spend the evening 168 00:07:09,730 --> 00:07:12,072 with my sweetie and her father, 'cause, you know, 169 00:07:12,072 --> 00:07:13,874 just the kind of boyfriend I am. 170 00:07:13,874 --> 00:07:15,255 Oh. 171 00:07:15,265 --> 00:07:16,577 Come here, you. 172 00:07:24,615 --> 00:07:27,117 C-7. 173 00:07:27,117 --> 00:07:28,138 Miss. 174 00:07:28,138 --> 00:07:29,339 How could that be a miss? 175 00:07:29,339 --> 00:07:31,111 C-6 was a hit, C-8 was a hit. 176 00:07:31,111 --> 00:07:33,313 Part of your starship has to be on C-7. 177 00:07:33,313 --> 00:07:35,956 Not if it has a hole in the middle. 178 00:07:37,718 --> 00:07:40,761 What kind of spaceship has a hole in the middle? 179 00:07:40,761 --> 00:07:44,334 A Romulan Battle Bagel? 180 00:07:45,806 --> 00:07:47,678 Knock-knock. 181 00:07:47,678 --> 00:07:49,279 Oh, great, you made it. 182 00:07:49,279 --> 00:07:50,481 Come on in. 183 00:07:51,311 --> 00:07:52,783 I invited her. 184 00:07:52,783 --> 00:07:54,925 So where's the telescope? 185 00:07:54,925 --> 00:07:57,828 It's in Hawaii, but Raj controls it from here. 186 00:07:57,828 --> 00:08:00,501 He's hoping to see Epsilon Eridani dim, which would be 187 00:08:00,501 --> 00:08:03,504 evidence of a planet orbiting it. 188 00:08:03,504 --> 00:08:05,045 So we just sit and stare at the screen, 189 00:08:05,045 --> 00:08:06,246 waiting for something to happen? 190 00:08:06,246 --> 00:08:10,350 I did it with you when we rented The Notebook. 191 00:08:13,123 --> 00:08:16,737 Yes, Gena Rowlands is a treasure. 192 00:08:16,737 --> 00:08:19,590 You'd better open up that bottle of wine 193 00:08:19,590 --> 00:08:23,233 or I'm gonna end up with swimmer's ear. 194 00:08:23,233 --> 00:08:24,384 Excuse me. 195 00:08:24,384 --> 00:08:26,116 I can't be drinking, I'm about to make 196 00:08:26,116 --> 00:08:27,888 an important scientific discovery here. 197 00:08:27,888 --> 00:08:31,061 What? Galileo did his best work while drinking wine. 198 00:08:31,061 --> 00:08:32,292 How do you know that? 199 00:08:32,302 --> 00:08:33,864 Well, he was Italian. 200 00:08:33,864 --> 00:08:36,537 It's a reasonable assumption. 201 00:08:36,537 --> 00:08:37,908 Dude, can you even open your mouth 202 00:08:37,908 --> 00:08:39,409 without spewing a cultural stereotype? 203 00:08:39,409 --> 00:08:42,683 Oh, I-I'm sorry, Galileo drank Diet Sprite. 204 00:08:44,274 --> 00:08:46,296 Look, you're my best friend, she's my girlfriend; 205 00:08:46,296 --> 00:08:47,478 you should bond. 206 00:08:47,478 --> 00:08:49,530 You know, like you and my mom did. 207 00:08:49,530 --> 00:08:52,773 Your mom creeps the hell out of me. 208 00:08:52,773 --> 00:08:57,177 Yes, but she's stopped calling you Slumdog Millionaire. 209 00:08:57,177 --> 00:08:58,378 I do appreciate that. 210 00:08:59,139 --> 00:09:01,141 Here we go. 211 00:09:01,141 --> 00:09:03,644 I'd like to propose a toast. 212 00:09:03,644 --> 00:09:05,966 To science and friendship. 213 00:09:07,538 --> 00:09:08,739 Hold on. Wait. 214 00:09:09,339 --> 00:09:10,641 No, it's okay, go ahead. 215 00:09:10,641 --> 00:09:11,712 What? 216 00:09:11,712 --> 00:09:12,843 Oh, I was working with 217 00:09:12,843 --> 00:09:14,685 penicillin-resistant gonorrhea in the lab today 218 00:09:14,685 --> 00:09:17,588 and I was just trying to remember if I washed my hands. 219 00:09:24,635 --> 00:09:26,136 Thanks for the steak, Wyatt. 220 00:09:26,136 --> 00:09:27,508 My pleasure. 221 00:09:27,508 --> 00:09:29,450 It's nice to have dinner with a boyfriend of Penny's 222 00:09:29,450 --> 00:09:30,781 that knows how to use a napkin. 223 00:09:31,982 --> 00:09:34,054 So not funny, Dad. 224 00:09:34,054 --> 00:09:36,457 Let me tell you about this one genius she was going out with, 225 00:09:36,457 --> 00:09:37,998 this-this fella Donnie. 226 00:09:37,998 --> 00:09:39,570 Oh, will you please let it go? 227 00:09:39,570 --> 00:09:41,532 Donnie was gonna make millions turning farm waste 228 00:09:41,532 --> 00:09:43,644 into biofuel and selling it to the government. 229 00:09:43,644 --> 00:09:45,345 A lot of people are doing that. 230 00:09:45,345 --> 00:09:46,777 Oh, see? 231 00:09:46,777 --> 00:09:49,069 Yeah, but all Donnie did was mix pig poop with a little water 232 00:09:49,069 --> 00:09:50,420 and pump it into his mom's Camry. 233 00:09:52,723 --> 00:09:53,724 Yeah, that's great. 234 00:09:53,724 --> 00:09:55,295 It's a funny story. Moving on. 235 00:09:55,295 --> 00:09:57,598 And Donnie was a rocket scientist compared to that boy 236 00:09:57,598 --> 00:09:59,710 who wanted to get beer pong into the Olympics. 237 00:09:59,710 --> 00:10:00,841 What was his name, sweetheart? 238 00:10:00,841 --> 00:10:03,313 Curtis, and I'm pretty sure he was joking. 239 00:10:03,313 --> 00:10:04,244 I don't know. 240 00:10:04,244 --> 00:10:05,646 That petition looked real to me. 241 00:10:06,637 --> 00:10:08,459 Yeah, okay, I think this ends 242 00:10:08,459 --> 00:10:10,230 the ex-boyfriend portion of our evening. 243 00:10:10,230 --> 00:10:13,313 Well, I'm just glad you finally found yourself a keeper. 244 00:10:13,313 --> 00:10:14,635 Thanks, Wyatt. 245 00:10:14,635 --> 00:10:17,007 I'm a keeper. 246 00:10:21,682 --> 00:10:23,554 Leonard, you want to come in for a nightcap? 247 00:10:23,554 --> 00:10:24,785 Oh, gee, Dad, he'd love to, 248 00:10:24,785 --> 00:10:26,226 but Leonard has to work in the morning. 249 00:10:26,226 --> 00:10:28,228 Maybe I could go in a little late. 250 00:10:28,228 --> 00:10:29,530 No, no, no, you can't. 251 00:10:29,530 --> 00:10:31,301 Your career is far too important. 252 00:10:31,301 --> 00:10:33,243 Behind every great man is a nagging woman 253 00:10:33,243 --> 00:10:35,876 who won't let him have any fun, am I right, Leonard? 254 00:10:36,747 --> 00:10:39,690 Don't I know it. 255 00:10:41,001 --> 00:10:41,992 Well, good night, son. 256 00:10:41,992 --> 00:10:43,223 Good night, Wyatt. 257 00:10:43,223 --> 00:10:44,715 Oh, good night, honey. 258 00:10:44,715 --> 00:10:46,497 Good night. 259 00:10:46,497 --> 00:10:49,510 I love you. 260 00:10:51,742 --> 00:10:53,393 Love you, too. 261 00:11:02,232 --> 00:11:03,804 Oh, friggety-frak. 262 00:11:03,804 --> 00:11:06,206 Not this again. 263 00:11:11,201 --> 00:11:15,496 Three, four, five— pass go, get 2,000 rupees— 264 00:11:15,496 --> 00:11:17,748 six, seven. 265 00:11:17,748 --> 00:11:21,051 Whoops. Can't go any further. There's a sacred cow in my way. 266 00:11:21,051 --> 00:11:22,473 Bernadette, please tell your boyfriend 267 00:11:22,473 --> 00:11:24,294 to cool it with the cow jokes. 268 00:11:24,294 --> 00:11:25,496 It won't help. 269 00:11:25,496 --> 00:11:27,397 Once he finds a joke he likes, he sticks with it. 270 00:11:27,397 --> 00:11:28,639 Yeah. 271 00:11:28,639 --> 00:11:30,010 Like his haircut material. 272 00:11:30,010 --> 00:11:32,142 Oh, right. Did you get your hair cut? 273 00:11:32,142 --> 00:11:34,685 "No. I got them all cut." 274 00:11:35,445 --> 00:11:37,818 Which is still so funny. 275 00:11:38,829 --> 00:11:40,541 And when you go to a Chinese restaurant, 276 00:11:40,541 --> 00:11:42,863 he always gets the same fortune in his fortune cookie. 277 00:11:42,863 --> 00:11:44,505 Right. "Help, I'm a prisoner 278 00:11:44,505 --> 00:11:46,507 in a Chinese fortune cookie factory." 279 00:11:48,509 --> 00:11:50,611 Okay, I think that's enough about me. 280 00:11:50,611 --> 00:11:53,013 He's right. Let's make fun of his mother. 281 00:11:54,024 --> 00:11:56,056 "Howard, come rub my feet! 282 00:11:56,056 --> 00:11:58,759 My corns are killing me!" 283 00:12:00,000 --> 00:12:02,503 "Howard, help me out of the tub! 284 00:12:02,503 --> 00:12:04,875 I'm stuck again!" 285 00:12:08,649 --> 00:12:10,821 Coming. 286 00:12:12,943 --> 00:12:15,165 Hey, lovebug. 287 00:12:16,036 --> 00:12:17,287 Shut up. 288 00:12:17,287 --> 00:12:19,289 You know what I've been doing for the last hour? 289 00:12:19,289 --> 00:12:21,942 Mm, dreamily doodling "Mrs. Leonard Hofstadter" 290 00:12:21,942 --> 00:12:23,574 in a notebook? 291 00:12:23,584 --> 00:12:25,686 Listening to my father go on and on 292 00:12:25,686 --> 00:12:27,187 about what a great guy you are. 293 00:12:27,187 --> 00:12:30,491 You got to admit, I am... I'm delightful. 294 00:12:31,762 --> 00:12:33,804 Why are you making this so difficult? 295 00:12:33,804 --> 00:12:35,035 It's not difficult for me. 296 00:12:35,035 --> 00:12:36,737 I'm having fun. 297 00:12:36,737 --> 00:12:37,938 Leonard. 298 00:12:37,938 --> 00:12:39,580 What do you want me to do? You started this. 299 00:12:39,580 --> 00:12:41,582 Do you want to go over and tell him we're broken up? 300 00:12:41,582 --> 00:12:42,653 No. Well, then, what do you want? 301 00:12:42,653 --> 00:12:43,854 I don't know. 302 00:12:43,854 --> 00:12:45,255 Don't you think that's something you should 303 00:12:45,255 --> 00:12:46,857 have figured out before you stomped over here? 304 00:12:46,857 --> 00:12:49,259 Maybe. 305 00:12:50,370 --> 00:12:51,932 Leonard, Penny, excellent. 306 00:12:51,932 --> 00:12:54,444 I'd like to say I'm very happy that you're back together, 307 00:12:54,444 --> 00:12:56,977 and if I can figure out a way to do so 308 00:12:56,977 --> 00:12:59,419 and sound sincere, I will. 309 00:12:59,419 --> 00:13:00,821 In the meantime, 310 00:13:00,821 --> 00:13:02,893 I'd like to go over some proposed changes 311 00:13:02,893 --> 00:13:05,165 to the roommate agreement specifically to address 312 00:13:05,165 --> 00:13:06,847 Penny's annoying personal habits. 313 00:13:06,847 --> 00:13:08,769 Oh, my God. 314 00:13:08,769 --> 00:13:11,191 What personal habits? I have a list. 315 00:13:11,191 --> 00:13:15,516 FYI, overuse of the phrase "Oh, my God" is number 12. 316 00:13:16,657 --> 00:13:18,358 Okay, Sheldon, you don't have to do this 317 00:13:18,358 --> 00:13:19,740 because Leonard and I are not... Ba-ba-ba-ba. 318 00:13:19,740 --> 00:13:21,862 Are you sure you want to include him in this? 319 00:13:21,862 --> 00:13:23,403 Include me in what? 320 00:13:23,403 --> 00:13:24,965 Is there a plot afoot? 321 00:13:24,965 --> 00:13:27,377 I'll have no truck with plots. 322 00:13:27,377 --> 00:13:28,809 No, you're right. 323 00:13:28,809 --> 00:13:32,282 No, there's... there's no plots, no trucks, no feet. 324 00:13:32,282 --> 00:13:34,655 So what other annoying habits shall we discuss? 325 00:13:34,655 --> 00:13:37,027 Uh, we don't discuss anything. 326 00:13:37,027 --> 00:13:40,070 Leonard is the signatory to the roommate agreement. 327 00:13:40,070 --> 00:13:41,832 As such, he bears responsibility 328 00:13:41,832 --> 00:13:44,745 for all your infractions and must pay all fines. 329 00:13:45,546 --> 00:13:46,947 Fines? Yes. 330 00:13:46,947 --> 00:13:48,519 If Penny's going to be spending nights here again, 331 00:13:48,519 --> 00:13:49,980 you'll need to set up an escrow account. 332 00:13:49,990 --> 00:13:51,421 Sign here. 333 00:13:55,526 --> 00:13:56,967 Hello, Hawaii. 334 00:13:56,967 --> 00:13:59,439 This is Dr. Koothrappali in Pasadena. 335 00:13:59,439 --> 00:14:02,773 I'd like you to reposition the telescope, please. 336 00:14:02,783 --> 00:14:05,185 Scarlett Johansson's house! 337 00:14:07,187 --> 00:14:08,839 I'm kidding, Hawaii. 338 00:14:08,839 --> 00:14:10,761 Mahalo. 339 00:14:10,761 --> 00:14:12,813 Whoo! 340 00:14:13,834 --> 00:14:15,235 It might have been a mistake 341 00:14:15,235 --> 00:14:17,177 to open that second bottle of wine. 342 00:14:17,177 --> 00:14:19,480 Well, live and learn. 343 00:14:19,480 --> 00:14:21,982 So, Raj, do you think this planet you're looking for 344 00:14:21,982 --> 00:14:24,725 could have an atmosphere that supports life? 345 00:14:24,725 --> 00:14:25,856 Maybe. 346 00:14:25,856 --> 00:14:27,728 If it did, I'd be famous. 347 00:14:27,728 --> 00:14:29,660 I'd be on the cover of magazines. 348 00:14:29,670 --> 00:14:31,271 And then, instead of living alone 349 00:14:31,271 --> 00:14:33,604 in my tiny apartment, I'd have a big mansion. 350 00:14:33,604 --> 00:14:35,075 That sounds great. 351 00:14:35,075 --> 00:14:36,547 It is. 352 00:14:36,547 --> 00:14:38,749 If you like wandering around a big, empty house 353 00:14:38,749 --> 00:14:41,391 with no one to love you. 354 00:14:43,123 --> 00:14:45,225 We'd come visit you. No, you wouldn't. 355 00:14:45,225 --> 00:14:48,438 You'd be intimidated by my wealth and fame. 356 00:14:49,409 --> 00:14:50,440 My only friends would be 357 00:14:50,440 --> 00:14:51,872 my genetically engineered monkey butler 358 00:14:51,872 --> 00:14:55,245 and the little people I hired to be my living chess set. 359 00:14:57,287 --> 00:15:00,060 He's taking a turn to the dark side, isn't he? 360 00:15:00,060 --> 00:15:02,232 Hold on. He could come back. 361 00:15:02,232 --> 00:15:03,604 Oh, what's the point of everything? 362 00:15:03,604 --> 00:15:06,036 Nope. He's gone. 363 00:15:06,036 --> 00:15:07,588 You know it's been more than a year 364 00:15:07,588 --> 00:15:08,839 since I've even kissed a girl? 365 00:15:08,839 --> 00:15:11,932 What about that hookup at Comic-Con you told me about? 366 00:15:11,932 --> 00:15:13,213 Oh, grow up. I was lying. 367 00:15:13,223 --> 00:15:15,686 I lie all the time. Nobody wants to kiss me. 368 00:15:15,686 --> 00:15:17,958 Oh, you poor, poor thing. 369 00:15:17,958 --> 00:15:20,871 Raj, you have to know you're a wonderful man. 370 00:15:20,871 --> 00:15:23,534 There are a lot of girls out there who'll want to kiss you. 371 00:15:23,544 --> 00:15:25,476 Where? 372 00:15:25,476 --> 00:15:27,447 You just have to look. 373 00:15:30,220 --> 00:15:33,153 No! 374 00:15:42,573 --> 00:15:44,745 Well, this was fun. 375 00:15:50,260 --> 00:15:52,232 Oh! I think I got a nibble. 376 00:15:52,232 --> 00:15:54,014 Oh, be careful. 377 00:15:54,014 --> 00:15:56,657 Give him some line. 378 00:15:56,657 --> 00:15:59,139 Okay, now reel him in. 379 00:15:59,139 --> 00:16:01,181 Oh, look at that baby. 380 00:16:01,181 --> 00:16:02,683 They're really biting, huh? 381 00:16:02,683 --> 00:16:05,536 Yeah. They do that when you set it on easy. 382 00:16:08,098 --> 00:16:10,200 Oh, that's me. 383 00:16:10,200 --> 00:16:11,722 Hello. 384 00:16:11,722 --> 00:16:13,003 Oh, hi, sweetie. 385 00:16:13,003 --> 00:16:15,305 Yeah, I got up early and didn't want to wake you, 386 00:16:15,305 --> 00:16:18,278 so I went out for coffee and ran into Leonard on the way back. 387 00:16:18,278 --> 00:16:21,021 Guess what— we're fishing. 388 00:16:21,021 --> 00:16:23,624 Yeah. Right here on his couch. 389 00:16:24,444 --> 00:16:26,667 Hey, baby. I love you! 390 00:16:28,469 --> 00:16:30,200 That's Leonard. 391 00:16:30,210 --> 00:16:32,713 Says he loves you. 392 00:16:32,713 --> 00:16:34,915 What? 393 00:16:36,186 --> 00:16:37,688 I see. 394 00:16:37,688 --> 00:16:39,760 The whole thing's bull squirt, huh? 395 00:16:41,462 --> 00:16:43,764 Well, that's very disappointing. 396 00:16:43,764 --> 00:16:45,966 Bye. 397 00:16:52,012 --> 00:16:53,413 Oh, hey. 398 00:16:53,423 --> 00:16:56,386 There's been something I've been meaning to tell you. 399 00:16:57,478 --> 00:16:59,760 I can't believe you would lie to me like that. 400 00:16:59,770 --> 00:17:01,472 Just for the record, I did not want to be a part of this. 401 00:17:01,472 --> 00:17:02,733 I'll get to you in a minute. 402 00:17:02,733 --> 00:17:04,705 No hurry. 403 00:17:04,705 --> 00:17:06,807 That my own daughter thinks I don't love her enough 404 00:17:06,817 --> 00:17:08,669 to support her no matter what choices she makes— 405 00:17:08,669 --> 00:17:09,750 well, that hurts me deeply. 406 00:17:09,750 --> 00:17:10,991 I'm sorry, Daddy... Let me finish. 407 00:17:10,991 --> 00:17:12,252 Oh. 408 00:17:12,252 --> 00:17:13,624 I thought we were past the days 409 00:17:13,624 --> 00:17:15,966 when you would try to pull the wool over my eyes. 410 00:17:15,966 --> 00:17:19,239 Telling me the baggie in your underwear drawer is potpourri? 411 00:17:20,410 --> 00:17:21,872 And the pee stick in your bathroom 412 00:17:21,872 --> 00:17:23,944 is to check for diabetes? 413 00:17:27,888 --> 00:17:29,820 You know, I'm sorry. 414 00:17:29,830 --> 00:17:31,632 You're a grown woman, and I respect your right 415 00:17:31,632 --> 00:17:33,494 to make your own decisions, but all I ask 416 00:17:33,504 --> 00:17:35,506 is you respect me enough to be honest about them. 417 00:17:35,506 --> 00:17:38,378 You're right. Look, from now on, I will tell you the truth. 418 00:17:38,378 --> 00:17:40,561 Thank you. Now, why don't you go and put some clothes on 419 00:17:40,561 --> 00:17:42,983 and we'll grab a bite to eat before I head for the airport. 420 00:17:42,983 --> 00:17:44,655 - Now you. - Daddy, he had nothing to do... 421 00:17:44,655 --> 00:17:46,487 - Keep walking. - Okay. 422 00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:53,604 Please, please, please don't give up on her. 423 00:17:55,576 --> 00:17:57,678 What? 424 00:17:57,678 --> 00:17:59,750 I can't go back to the skateboard idiots, 425 00:17:59,750 --> 00:18:01,351 the white rappers and all those 426 00:18:01,351 --> 00:18:04,765 sweaty dumb-asses with their backwards hats. 427 00:18:05,766 --> 00:18:08,769 Gee, I don't know if it's in the cards, sir. 428 00:18:08,769 --> 00:18:10,270 Then, stack the deck. 429 00:18:10,270 --> 00:18:11,712 Cheat. 430 00:18:11,712 --> 00:18:13,814 Lie. I don't care. 431 00:18:13,814 --> 00:18:15,415 I want grandkids before I die, 432 00:18:15,415 --> 00:18:18,318 and I want them to grow up in a house without wheels. 433 00:18:24,404 --> 00:18:25,966 I'll give it a shot. 434 00:18:25,966 --> 00:18:27,638 Thank you. 435 00:18:27,638 --> 00:18:29,530 Now I'm going to do something here to help you along. 436 00:18:29,530 --> 00:18:31,201 Excuse me? Just don't panic. 437 00:18:31,201 --> 00:18:34,455 Now, get your sorry, lying ass out of my face 438 00:18:34,455 --> 00:18:36,687 and make sure I never see it again! 439 00:18:36,697 --> 00:18:38,659 Oh, the reverse psychology thing. 440 00:18:38,659 --> 00:18:40,130 I see. That's very clever. 441 00:18:40,130 --> 00:18:42,372 Don't yap. Just get out. 442 00:18:43,193 --> 00:18:45,005 I'll friend you on Facebook. 443 00:18:51,622 --> 00:18:53,253 Oh, there you are. 444 00:18:53,263 --> 00:18:55,866 Just so you know, I was up all night, 445 00:18:55,866 --> 00:18:57,768 but I have finally completed 446 00:18:57,768 --> 00:19:01,612 the Penny-specific section of the new roommate agreement. 447 00:19:01,612 --> 00:19:03,273 Yeah, well, not necessary. 448 00:19:03,283 --> 00:19:05,045 We broke up again. 449 00:19:17,277 --> 00:19:20,440 Do you even think about other people, Leonard? 450 00:19:21,782 --> 00:19:23,854 Do you? 451 00:19:31,411 --> 00:19:34,124 - Hey. - Oh, how'd it go last night? 452 00:19:34,184 --> 00:19:36,306 Oh, you know. 453 00:19:36,306 --> 00:19:38,058 Same old, same old. 454 00:19:38,058 --> 00:19:39,890 Looked through a telescope, saw some stars. 455 00:19:39,900 --> 00:19:41,311 Big whoop. 456 00:19:41,311 --> 00:19:42,503 Really? 457 00:19:42,503 --> 00:19:43,984 You waited months for time with that telescope. 458 00:19:43,984 --> 00:19:45,125 What happened? 459 00:19:45,125 --> 00:19:47,708 Why? You writing a book? 460 00:19:47,708 --> 00:19:49,960 I'm going to propose a hypothesis. 461 00:19:49,970 --> 00:19:53,223 Last night, Raj accidentally made contact 462 00:19:53,223 --> 00:19:55,856 with an alien civilization 463 00:19:55,856 --> 00:19:58,028 and has been ordered by the United States government 464 00:19:58,028 --> 00:20:00,070 to keep it a secret. 465 00:20:00,901 --> 00:20:02,042 Nothing happened. 466 00:20:02,042 --> 00:20:03,804 Can we please just change the subject? 467 00:20:03,814 --> 00:20:05,345 That sounds rehearsed. 468 00:20:05,345 --> 00:20:06,977 We are not alone. 469 00:20:07,818 --> 00:20:08,819 Hey. 470 00:20:08,819 --> 00:20:10,150 Hey. Hello. 471 00:20:10,160 --> 00:20:12,422 Hey. Hey. 472 00:20:13,794 --> 00:20:16,166 You get to play with Raj's big telescope last night? 473 00:20:18,709 --> 00:20:20,210 Whoa. 474 00:20:20,210 --> 00:20:22,032 Where did that come from? 475 00:20:22,032 --> 00:20:24,585 He never touched my telescope. 476 00:20:24,585 --> 00:20:26,156 Way to go shutting up. 477 00:20:26,156 --> 00:20:27,287 I did shut up. Now you shut up. 478 00:20:27,287 --> 00:20:28,659 Fine. Thank you. 479 00:20:34,434 --> 00:20:36,406 I can't believe you didn't call me this morning. 480 00:20:38,398 --> 00:20:41,401 — Sync, corrected by — Sync, corrected by elderman — — for www.addic7ed.com — 481 00:20:41,401 --> 00:20:42,402 — Resync to The Big Bang Theory S04 720p BluRay x264-CLUE by lorez —