1
00:00:03,720 --> 00:00:05,420
Hey. So you guys ready
to order?

2
00:00:05,420 --> 00:00:08,820
Since we come in
every Tuesday night at 6:00

3
00:00:08,820 --> 00:00:12,590
and order the same exact thing,
and it's now 6:08,

4
00:00:12,590 --> 00:00:14,990
I believe your question
not only answers itself

5
00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:18,100
but also stands alongside
such other nonsensical queries

6
00:00:18,100 --> 00:00:23,140
as "Who let the dogs out?"
and, uh, "How are they hanging"

7
00:00:23,140 --> 00:00:25,440
Okay.

8
00:00:25,440 --> 00:00:28,140
So, the usual, with extra spit
on Sheldon's hamburger.

9
00:00:28,140 --> 00:00:30,840
Penny, a moment?

10
00:00:30,840 --> 00:00:32,380
Do you have plans
this weekend?

11
00:00:32,380 --> 00:00:33,580
Oh, gee, Amy, I'm sorry,

12
00:00:33,580 --> 00:00:34,880
I'm actually pretty busy
this weekend.

13
00:00:34,880 --> 00:00:37,650
Probably serving food
that was ordered today.

14
00:00:38,690 --> 00:00:40,990
That's too bad. I was hoping
you could be my plus-one

15
00:00:40,990 --> 00:00:43,160
at the Institute
of Interdisciplinary Studies'

16
00:00:43,160 --> 00:00:45,190
symposium on the impact
of current scientific research

17
00:00:45,190 --> 00:00:46,530
on societal interactions.

18
00:00:46,530 --> 00:00:49,530
The what?

19
00:00:51,030 --> 00:00:52,630
It's an annual
science conference.

20
00:00:52,630 --> 00:00:54,000
We've all been invited to speak.

21
00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:57,240
Oh! Oh, okay, well, you know,
like I said, I have plans, so...

22
00:00:57,240 --> 00:00:59,040
Shame. Since you're
my best friend,

23
00:00:59,040 --> 00:01:01,110
I thought it would be
a good bonding opportunity.

24
00:01:01,110 --> 00:01:03,880
I'm your best friend?

25
00:01:03,880 --> 00:01:05,610
Don't you read my blog?

26
00:01:05,610 --> 00:01:07,380
Oh, don't feel bad.

27
00:01:07,380 --> 00:01:09,980
I never read Leonard's, and
I used to sleep with him.

28
00:01:13,250 --> 00:01:15,150
Do you know anybody else
who would appreciate

29
00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:16,590
an all-expense-paid spa weekend

30
00:01:16,590 --> 00:01:18,060
at a four-star resort
in Big Sur?

31
00:01:18,060 --> 00:01:20,960
No, I really— I'm sorry,
free what? Sorry, what, what?

32
00:01:20,960 --> 00:01:23,030
I think her weekend
just opened up.

33
00:01:23,030 --> 00:01:26,230
Wait, wait, just to be clear,
when you guys say "spa,"

34
00:01:26,230 --> 00:01:29,470
does that mean the same thing
as when regular people say it?

35
00:01:29,470 --> 00:01:30,740
Pretty much.

36
00:01:30,740 --> 00:01:33,470
Except we keep
our shirts on in the sauna.

37
00:01:33,470 --> 00:01:35,910
You know, it is going
to be difficult,

38
00:01:35,910 --> 00:01:39,040
but I'm going to cancel my plans
so I can do this for my bestie.

39
00:01:39,050 --> 00:01:40,880
Please don't touch my breasts.

40
00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:43,450
I... I wasn't going to.

41
00:01:43,450 --> 00:01:46,150
All right. I just want
to establish boundaries.

42
00:01:46,150 --> 00:01:48,850
Boy, this is great. I haven't
had a vacation in ages.

43
00:01:48,860 --> 00:01:52,220
In order to take a vacation,
one first has to work.

44
00:01:52,230 --> 00:01:54,160
You know, for a smart guy,

45
00:01:54,160 --> 00:01:56,360
you really seem to have a
hard time grasping the concept

46
00:01:56,360 --> 00:01:59,700
"don't piss off the people
who handle the things you eat."

47
00:01:59,700 --> 00:02:02,840
That does seem to be
a valid principle.

48
00:02:02,840 --> 00:02:05,070
I trust Penny will adhere to

49
00:02:05,070 --> 00:02:06,870
the "Official California
Restaurant Workers'

50
00:02:06,870 --> 00:02:09,210
Solemn Oath of Ethics
and Cleanliness."

51
00:02:09,210 --> 00:02:11,610
I don't believe
there's any such thing.

52
00:02:12,550 --> 00:02:15,380
You lied to me?

53
00:02:40,550 --> 00:02:41,520
Good morning.

54
00:02:41,520 --> 00:02:43,360
If I could have everyone's
attention, please?

55
00:02:43,360 --> 00:02:46,760
I know we're all eager
to get on the road to Big Sur,

56
00:02:46,760 --> 00:02:49,330
so if we focus, I'm sure we can
get through this orientation

57
00:02:49,330 --> 00:02:50,830
in under a half an hour.

58
00:02:51,800 --> 00:02:54,270
Then it's just Q&A,
quiz, safety drills,

59
00:02:54,270 --> 00:02:57,440
pose for commemorative
group photo and we're off.

60
00:02:57,440 --> 00:03:00,240
Don't worry. Just sit
next to me during the quiz,

61
00:03:00,240 --> 00:03:02,540
and you can copy my answers.

62
00:03:02,550 --> 00:03:03,750
Raj?

63
00:03:03,750 --> 00:03:04,950
What are you doing?

64
00:03:05,720 --> 00:03:07,450
I don't think so.

65
00:03:08,320 --> 00:03:10,220
You've had your allotted
six ounces.

66
00:03:10,220 --> 00:03:13,360
The first bathroom break
isn't until the Denny's

67
00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:16,190
located near Bakersfield,

68
00:03:16,190 --> 00:03:19,160
which is approximately
two and half hours away.

69
00:03:19,160 --> 00:03:23,100
Remember, people, we're only as
strong as our weakest bladder.

70
00:03:24,500 --> 00:03:28,500
Nobody cares about
your Kegel exercises.

71
00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:32,610
All right. We have
seven people, and two cars.

72
00:03:32,610 --> 00:03:35,910
In the lead car,
driven by Leonard,

73
00:03:35,910 --> 00:03:39,150
will be... myself,

74
00:03:39,150 --> 00:03:41,380
Amy Farrah Fowler,

75
00:03:41,380 --> 00:03:43,320
and Penny.

76
00:03:43,320 --> 00:03:45,020
Yes!

77
00:03:45,020 --> 00:03:49,390
He had you in the other car,
but I got you upgraded.

78
00:03:50,230 --> 00:03:52,060
Yay!

79
00:03:52,060 --> 00:03:53,930
She made the case
that if we break down

80
00:03:53,930 --> 00:03:56,770
in the middle of nowhere,
your Nebraska backwoods skills

81
00:03:56,770 --> 00:03:58,830
and brawny hands
will give us the best chance

82
00:03:58,840 --> 00:04:00,840
to survive in the wild.

83
00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:03,210
Brawny?

84
00:04:03,210 --> 00:04:05,740
They're bigger
than mine.

85
00:04:06,910 --> 00:04:09,750
Red Leader to Red Five,
come in.

86
00:04:11,880 --> 00:04:14,780
Red Leader to Red Five,
come in.

87
00:04:14,780 --> 00:04:16,990
Howard, you promised.

88
00:04:18,960 --> 00:04:20,890
Fine. Red Five to Red Leader.

89
00:04:20,890 --> 00:04:22,460
What do you want now?

90
00:04:22,460 --> 00:04:28,060
It's 11:15. I'm requesting your
quarter-hourly location update.

91
00:04:28,060 --> 00:04:29,730
Still right behind you.

92
00:04:29,730 --> 00:04:32,770
Copy that, Red Five.

93
00:04:32,770 --> 00:04:34,370
Radio contact is sufficient.

94
00:04:34,370 --> 00:04:36,300
No need to extend
your middle finger.

95
00:04:37,910 --> 00:04:40,610
So, Amy, I've
been wondering,

96
00:04:40,610 --> 00:04:43,350
are you and Sheldon going
to be sharing a room?

97
00:04:43,350 --> 00:04:45,250
No, we discussed it.

98
00:04:45,250 --> 00:04:47,350
We decided we didn't want
to jeopardize our relationship

99
00:04:47,350 --> 00:04:49,180
by getting to know
each other too well.

100
00:04:50,290 --> 00:04:52,850
Indeed. Nothing sours
a friendship more

101
00:04:52,860 --> 00:04:56,660
than over-familiarity
with someone's toilet routine.

102
00:04:56,660 --> 00:04:58,360
I can vouch for that.

103
00:04:58,360 --> 00:05:00,700
Hey.
Not you, him.

104
00:05:00,700 --> 00:05:02,130
Oh. Thanks.

105
00:05:02,130 --> 00:05:05,700
Although yours
was an eye-opener.

106
00:05:06,700 --> 00:05:08,570
Don't worry, Penny.

107
00:05:08,570 --> 00:05:10,870
You're my plus-one.
You'll bunk with me.

108
00:05:10,870 --> 00:05:13,210
And FYI, travel
makes me constipated,

109
00:05:13,210 --> 00:05:15,880
so I'm the ideal
hotel roommate.

110
00:05:15,880 --> 00:05:18,250
Terrific.

111
00:05:18,250 --> 00:05:20,680
Are we there yet?

112
00:05:21,850 --> 00:05:25,020
I hope we get there in time
to see the keynote address.

113
00:05:25,020 --> 00:05:27,420
Really? You want to see
the keynote?

114
00:05:27,420 --> 00:05:29,560
Yeah, it sounds fun.

115
00:05:29,560 --> 00:05:30,930
"Super bacteria:

116
00:05:30,930 --> 00:05:34,330
global apocalypse or
exciting research opportunity?"

117
00:05:34,330 --> 00:05:37,870
Actually, I was thinking we
could go straight to the room

118
00:05:37,870 --> 00:05:40,040
and... take a nap.

119
00:05:40,040 --> 00:05:41,400
Really?

120
00:05:41,400 --> 00:05:42,970
And miss the keynote?

121
00:05:42,970 --> 00:05:45,470
We can watch it later on C-

122
00:05:45,480 --> 00:05:48,240
Besides, I was really
looking forward to you and me...

123
00:05:48,240 --> 00:05:49,910
napping together in the hotel.

124
00:05:49,910 --> 00:05:51,850
Honey, if you're
that tired,

125
00:05:51,850 --> 00:05:54,350
why don't you just take
a nap here in the car?

126
00:05:54,350 --> 00:05:55,980
No, see, it's not...

127
00:05:55,990 --> 00:05:57,890
Hang on.
It's Leonard.

128
00:05:57,890 --> 00:05:59,920
Hi, Leonard.

129
00:05:59,920 --> 00:06:02,720
Yeah, hi. Listen, I just
got a text from Raj.

130
00:06:02,730 --> 00:06:03,960
He wanted me to tell you

131
00:06:03,960 --> 00:06:06,230
that when Howard says "nap,"
he means "sex."

132
00:06:08,870 --> 00:06:10,930
Thank you, Raj.

133
00:06:12,370 --> 00:06:16,240
Are you... an element
in the actinoid series?

134
00:06:16,240 --> 00:06:17,510
No.

135
00:06:17,510 --> 00:06:18,710
Amy?

136
00:06:18,710 --> 00:06:21,780
Are you usually radioactive
when found in nature?

137
00:06:21,780 --> 00:06:22,910
No.

138
00:06:22,910 --> 00:06:24,510
Are you in the
lanthanoid series?

139
00:06:24,510 --> 00:06:26,450
Amy, it's Penny's turn.

140
00:06:27,820 --> 00:06:29,380
Penny?

141
00:06:29,390 --> 00:06:31,620
Uh, I don't know...

142
00:06:31,620 --> 00:06:32,990
Are you food?

143
00:06:35,630 --> 00:06:37,860
That's not apropos.

144
00:06:37,860 --> 00:06:40,930
We've already established
I'm found in the periodic table.

145
00:06:40,930 --> 00:06:42,630
Well, it's a table, right?

146
00:06:42,630 --> 00:06:45,170
I mean, why can't there
be food on it?

147
00:06:45,170 --> 00:06:48,340
I knew she wasn't
lead car materiel.

148
00:06:48,340 --> 00:06:51,010
Who elected you
Road Trip God?

149
00:06:51,010 --> 00:06:53,010
Leonard.

150
00:06:53,010 --> 00:06:55,640
It was a late-night vote.

151
00:06:56,650 --> 00:06:58,080
We were all exhausted,

152
00:06:58,080 --> 00:07:00,080
and he was threatening
to filibuster.

153
00:07:00,080 --> 00:07:02,250
It's not technically
"Road Trip God"

154
00:07:02,250 --> 00:07:03,690
it's Travel Supervisor.

155
00:07:03,690 --> 00:07:07,760
Although Road Trip God
does have a certain ring to it.

156
00:07:07,760 --> 00:07:09,420
I don't understand
why you people

157
00:07:09,430 --> 00:07:10,960
just let him bully
you like this.

158
00:07:10,960 --> 00:07:12,330
Someone should
stand up to him.

159
00:07:12,330 --> 00:07:14,300
What's he going to do?

160
00:07:16,130 --> 00:07:19,430
I can't believe you let him
kick me out of the car.

161
00:07:19,440 --> 00:07:22,800
What could we do?
He's the Travel Supervisor.

162
00:07:23,910 --> 00:07:26,040
Don't worry, Penny.
This is a better car anyway.

163
00:07:26,040 --> 00:07:28,010
Yeah. It's the Love Car.

164
00:07:28,880 --> 00:07:30,680
Should I ask?

165
00:07:52,870 --> 00:07:54,440
Red Leader, I'm really sorry.

166
00:08:07,420 --> 00:08:10,020
I missed you.

167
00:08:10,020 --> 00:08:13,860
You know what?
I missed you, too.

168
00:08:13,860 --> 00:08:15,820
Bernadette?

169
00:08:16,330 --> 00:08:18,030
Oh, my God, Glenn!

170
00:08:18,030 --> 00:08:19,630
Great to see you!

171
00:08:19,630 --> 00:08:21,600
Are you here
for the conference?

172
00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:23,530
Yeah, I'm doing
a global warming panel.

173
00:08:23,530 --> 00:08:24,600
Oh, good for you.

174
00:08:24,600 --> 00:08:27,040
Uh, Glenn,
this is my boyfriend Howard.

175
00:08:27,040 --> 00:08:29,540
Nice to meet you.
Hi.

176
00:08:29,540 --> 00:08:31,140
Ow. Hi.

177
00:08:31,140 --> 00:08:32,940
You're a lucky man.

178
00:08:32,940 --> 00:08:34,680
Bernie's
a great gal.

179
00:08:34,680 --> 00:08:38,050
Yes. "Bernie" sure is.

180
00:08:38,050 --> 00:08:40,220
Well, I got to run.
The panel's tomorrow morning.

181
00:08:40,220 --> 00:08:42,680
It's called, "Remembering Snow:
A Look Back."

182
00:08:42,690 --> 00:08:45,390
I'll try to catch it.

183
00:08:45,390 --> 00:08:46,790
Oh, great.

184
00:08:46,790 --> 00:08:48,360
Bye.
Bye.

185
00:08:51,230 --> 00:08:53,530
Hey... Bernie?

186
00:08:53,530 --> 00:08:54,700
Yeah?

187
00:08:54,700 --> 00:08:58,100
Please tell me he's
your gay cousin.

188
00:08:58,100 --> 00:09:00,900
No.

189
00:09:00,900 --> 00:09:02,900
He was one of my professors
in college.

190
00:09:02,910 --> 00:09:05,710
Oh! That's a relief.

191
00:09:05,710 --> 00:09:07,280
Then we went out
for a year.

192
00:09:08,540 --> 00:09:11,450
Come on, let's check in,
so we can take that nap.

193
00:09:14,850 --> 00:09:17,120
No, it's not necessarily
proportional...

194
00:09:17,120 --> 00:09:18,390
Shut up!

195
00:09:24,510 --> 00:09:26,400
That green bag
is Dr. Cooper's.

196
00:09:26,450 --> 00:09:28,320
Here's an extra five.
Make him wait.

197
00:09:32,230 --> 00:09:33,960
Oh.

198
00:09:33,960 --> 00:09:36,600
Right to the nap, huh? Okay.

199
00:09:37,400 --> 00:09:39,730
Uh, so, this Glenn guy.

200
00:09:39,730 --> 00:09:42,500
You say you went out with
him for, like, a year.

201
00:09:42,500 --> 00:09:44,540
Do we really need to talk
about my old boyfriend now?

202
00:09:44,540 --> 00:09:46,870
No. I guess not.

203
00:09:48,640 --> 00:09:51,380
What is he, like,
six-four, six-five?

204
00:09:51,380 --> 00:09:53,150
Six-seven.

205
00:09:53,150 --> 00:09:57,350
Probably has a hard time
finding a suit that fits.

206
00:09:58,190 --> 00:09:59,850
Is something
bothering you?

207
00:09:59,850 --> 00:10:02,190
No. It's just...
What?

208
00:10:02,190 --> 00:10:03,490
I'm just thinking.

209
00:10:03,490 --> 00:10:05,020
If you had sex with that guy,

210
00:10:05,030 --> 00:10:06,960
I mean, there's nothing
I can do here

211
00:10:06,960 --> 00:10:12,100
that will make
any kind of... impact.

212
00:10:12,100 --> 00:10:13,770
Howard, it's not a contest.

213
00:10:13,770 --> 00:10:15,630
I love you.
I want to be with you.

214
00:10:15,640 --> 00:10:18,270
Yeah, great, love you, too,
but...

215
00:10:18,270 --> 00:10:21,670
If it were a contest,

216
00:10:21,680 --> 00:10:24,180
I wouldn't have a chance, right?

217
00:10:24,180 --> 00:10:25,410
You can't think
that way.

218
00:10:25,410 --> 00:10:26,610
Yep.

219
00:10:26,610 --> 00:10:28,810
Loser.

220
00:10:30,820 --> 00:10:32,480
Howard, stop it.

221
00:10:32,490 --> 00:10:34,220
Sorry. I just
never figured that

222
00:10:34,220 --> 00:10:36,460
a guy like me going out
with a girl like you

223
00:10:36,460 --> 00:10:39,090
would ever have to compete
with a guy like that.

224
00:10:40,430 --> 00:10:43,430
Wait a minute, "a girl like me"?
What's that mean?

225
00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:49,670
I'm... I...

226
00:10:49,670 --> 00:10:51,540
Are you saying you
don't think I'm hot enough

227
00:10:51,540 --> 00:10:53,140
to go out with a guy like Glenn?

228
00:10:53,140 --> 00:10:56,110
No! No, I'm saying
exactly the opposite.

229
00:10:56,110 --> 00:10:59,010
I'm too hot to go out
with a guy like Glenn?

230
00:11:00,580 --> 00:11:02,950
Yeah, let's go with that.

231
00:11:10,360 --> 00:11:12,590
Still nothing.

232
00:11:13,690 --> 00:11:16,000
Remind me to try again
in an hour.

233
00:11:16,000 --> 00:11:18,200
Will do.

234
00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:21,970
So...

235
00:11:21,970 --> 00:11:23,600
girl talk?

236
00:11:23,600 --> 00:11:25,540
Um, sure.

237
00:11:25,540 --> 00:11:27,240
What do you got in mind?

238
00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:30,780
Do you subscribe to the Freudian
theory of penis envy?

239
00:11:32,580 --> 00:11:35,110
Um, I never really
thought about it.

240
00:11:35,120 --> 00:11:36,380
Why?

241
00:11:36,380 --> 00:11:39,290
Sometimes I think it might be
nice to have one.

242
00:11:39,290 --> 00:11:40,550
Really?

243
00:11:40,550 --> 00:11:43,120
Not for sex, for convenience.

244
00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:45,620
You can't deny that,
by comparison,

245
00:11:45,630 --> 00:11:48,260
our internal plumbing
is extremely high maintenance.

246
00:11:48,260 --> 00:11:52,360
Again, I've never given
it much thought.

247
00:11:52,370 --> 00:11:54,130
We have time now.

248
00:11:54,130 --> 00:11:55,370
Think about it.

249
00:11:57,170 --> 00:11:59,000
Oh, good.

250
00:12:02,880 --> 00:12:04,040
Hey.

251
00:12:04,040 --> 00:12:05,180
Can I stay here tonight?

252
00:12:05,180 --> 00:12:06,150
Yeah. Why, what happened?

253
00:12:06,150 --> 00:12:08,810
Howard's a complete
and total ass.

254
00:12:08,820 --> 00:12:10,650
Oh, yeah, that.
Come on in.

255
00:12:12,320 --> 00:12:14,220
Thanks. I'll sleep
on the floor.

256
00:12:14,220 --> 00:12:15,590
Not necessary.

257
00:12:15,590 --> 00:12:17,960
Penny and I are perfectly
comfortable sharing a bed.

258
00:12:17,960 --> 00:12:20,060
We are?

259
00:12:20,060 --> 00:12:22,590
Of course, we're best friends.

260
00:12:22,600 --> 00:12:25,760
Oh, right, right, the blog.

261
00:12:25,770 --> 00:12:26,870
Word of warning, though.

262
00:12:26,870 --> 00:12:28,230
I'm prone to night terrors,

263
00:12:28,230 --> 00:12:30,540
so when I wake up kicking
and screaming, don't panic.

264
00:12:30,540 --> 00:12:33,540
Just pin me down and stroke
my hair, and I'll be fine.

265
00:12:39,810 --> 00:12:41,680
Hey, can I stay here tonight?
Shh-shh-shh.

266
00:12:41,680 --> 00:12:43,620
Sheldon's asleep.

267
00:12:43,620 --> 00:12:44,780
What's going on?

268
00:12:44,780 --> 00:12:46,720
Well, Howard's a complete
and total ass,

269
00:12:46,720 --> 00:12:48,150
Bernadette's in my bed,

270
00:12:48,150 --> 00:12:51,660
and no matter how much you
stroke Amy's hair, she bites.

271
00:12:51,660 --> 00:12:53,060
What?
Never mind.

272
00:12:53,060 --> 00:12:54,560
Can I stay here or not?

273
00:12:54,560 --> 00:12:56,030
Uh, sure.
All right.

274
00:13:01,700 --> 00:13:03,700
So, how do you want
to do this?

275
00:13:03,700 --> 00:13:06,270
Well, I'm not getting
in bed with him.

276
00:13:07,440 --> 00:13:09,170
Yeah, it is
a little like

277
00:13:09,180 --> 00:13:10,480
getting into
Dracula's coffin.

278
00:13:10,480 --> 00:13:14,350
We're just gonna have
to make the best of this.

279
00:13:15,320 --> 00:13:17,520
Okay, when you say
"make the best of it..."

280
00:13:17,520 --> 00:13:19,150
Sleep.
Right.

281
00:13:20,150 --> 00:13:23,620
So we'll just call
the middle here

282
00:13:23,620 --> 00:13:24,890
the Neutral Zone.

283
00:13:24,890 --> 00:13:26,560
The what?

284
00:13:26,560 --> 00:13:29,030
Star Trek.

285
00:13:29,030 --> 00:13:30,500
You know, the
Neutral Zone

286
00:13:30,500 --> 00:13:32,800
between the Federation
and the Romulan Empire.

287
00:13:32,800 --> 00:13:34,430
Oh, okay.

288
00:13:34,430 --> 00:13:37,370
Just like old times.

289
00:13:42,010 --> 00:13:43,810
Of course,

290
00:13:43,810 --> 00:13:46,980
sometimes the Federation
and the Romulans

291
00:13:46,980 --> 00:13:48,850
would enter
the Neutral Zone

292
00:13:48,850 --> 00:13:50,980
to negotiate a
temporary truce.

293
00:13:50,980 --> 00:13:54,920
Sweetie, let me put this
in a way you'll understand:

294
00:13:54,920 --> 00:13:57,820
from the waist down,
my shields are up.

295
00:13:58,660 --> 00:14:00,630
Got it, got it.

296
00:14:03,760 --> 00:14:05,800
We can do all
kinds of stuff

297
00:14:05,800 --> 00:14:08,370
from the waist up,
you know?

298
00:14:08,370 --> 00:14:10,200
Go to sleep.
Good night.

299
00:14:16,210 --> 00:14:19,510
Please tell me
you're not having coitus.

300
00:14:21,850 --> 00:14:24,380
We are not having coitus.

301
00:14:24,380 --> 00:14:26,020
Can you guarantee
that it won't happen

302
00:14:26,020 --> 00:14:27,220
at any time during the night?

303
00:14:27,220 --> 00:14:29,560
Yes.
No.

304
00:14:40,470 --> 00:14:45,240
Next on Turner Classic Movies,
Bridget Jones's Diary.

305
00:14:45,240 --> 00:14:49,070
Oh, my God, I'm crying already.

306
00:14:50,380 --> 00:14:53,010
Raj? Raj?

307
00:14:53,010 --> 00:14:54,510
Raj?

308
00:14:58,790 --> 00:15:00,750
I need to sleep
here tonight.

309
00:15:00,750 --> 00:15:02,120
Why?

310
00:15:02,120 --> 00:15:04,090
Howard is a complete
and total ass,

311
00:15:04,090 --> 00:15:06,390
Bernadette is in Penny's
bed, Amy bites,

312
00:15:06,390 --> 00:15:09,830
and Penny may or may not
have coitus with Leonard.

313
00:15:09,830 --> 00:15:12,260
Okay. Come on in.

314
00:15:16,600 --> 00:15:18,070
Leonard, are you asleep?

315
00:15:18,070 --> 00:15:19,340
No.

316
00:15:19,340 --> 00:15:22,070
I really appreciate you letting
me stay here tonight.

317
00:15:22,080 --> 00:15:23,380
Sure, no problem.

318
00:15:23,380 --> 00:15:25,180
I know it's kinda weird.

319
00:15:25,180 --> 00:15:26,980
True dat.

320
00:15:26,980 --> 00:15:29,550
"True dat"?

321
00:15:29,550 --> 00:15:33,020
I've gotten a lot more street
since we broke up.

322
00:15:35,660 --> 00:15:37,820
Right.

323
00:15:37,820 --> 00:15:39,730
Still mad at me about that?

324
00:15:39,730 --> 00:15:41,960
No. No, I understand.

325
00:15:41,960 --> 00:15:45,400
I got too intense,
you had to back off.

326
00:15:45,400 --> 00:15:48,000
Thank you.

327
00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:51,040
I've gotten a lot better
at that, you know.

328
00:15:52,340 --> 00:15:54,610
I've dated four different women
since we broke up

329
00:15:54,610 --> 00:15:57,110
and I didn't tell any of them
that I loved them

330
00:15:57,110 --> 00:15:58,880
and wanted
to have their babies.

331
00:15:58,880 --> 00:16:01,710
Good for you.

332
00:16:03,620 --> 00:16:04,620
Okay, good night.

333
00:16:04,620 --> 00:16:06,950
Good night.

334
00:16:08,560 --> 00:16:13,630
You know, maybe it wouldn't be
the worst idea in the world

335
00:16:13,630 --> 00:16:16,960
to violate the Neutral Zone
for just one night.

336
00:16:16,960 --> 00:16:18,500
Oh!

337
00:16:20,330 --> 00:16:22,100
Hey, Leonard,
Sheldon kicked me

338
00:16:22,100 --> 00:16:24,340
out of the room,
gave me your key.

339
00:16:25,270 --> 00:16:26,740
Penny's here.

340
00:16:30,580 --> 00:16:35,450
No, we don't want to watch
Bridget Jones's Diary!

341
00:16:40,590 --> 00:16:44,890
Good morning and welcome
to Science and Society.

342
00:16:44,890 --> 00:16:51,630
I'm Dr. Sheldon Cooper, BS, MS,
MA, PhD, and ScD.

343
00:16:51,630 --> 00:16:54,030
OMG, right?

344
00:16:57,000 --> 00:17:00,670
Perhaps that joke was a little
too hippie-dippy for this crowd.

345
00:17:00,670 --> 00:17:02,940
All right then, we'll begin
with opening remarks.

346
00:17:02,940 --> 00:17:06,080
Miss Rostenkowski,
would you like to start us off

347
00:17:06,080 --> 00:17:07,550
by discussing
your assessment

348
00:17:07,550 --> 00:17:10,680
of science's responsibility
to society?

349
00:17:10,680 --> 00:17:11,920
Sure.

350
00:17:11,920 --> 00:17:13,950
I think all branches
of science

351
00:17:13,950 --> 00:17:16,250
have to move cautiously
these days.

352
00:17:16,260 --> 00:17:18,360
It's not just giant
nuclear weapons

353
00:17:18,360 --> 00:17:19,890
that can destroy
the world.

354
00:17:19,890 --> 00:17:21,960
As a microbiologist,
I can tell you

355
00:17:21,960 --> 00:17:26,670
even the tiniest organisms
can still tear you a new one.

356
00:17:29,470 --> 00:17:30,840
Interesting.

357
00:17:30,840 --> 00:17:33,940
I think what you might need
to know about my colleague

358
00:17:33,940 --> 00:17:37,980
is that though she claims
her field of interest is tiny organisms,

359
00:17:37,980 --> 00:17:41,750
she certainly has spent
her fair share of time

360
00:17:41,750 --> 00:17:46,750
around what we can assume was
pretty massive weaponry.

361
00:17:48,090 --> 00:17:51,460
I think Mr. Wolowitz
needs to keep in mind

362
00:17:51,460 --> 00:17:53,390
that the past
is the past.

363
00:17:53,390 --> 00:17:55,930
But he should know
that I am the kind of girl

364
00:17:55,930 --> 00:17:59,330
who could get all
the giant missiles she wants.

365
00:18:02,170 --> 00:18:04,770
Are we talking about women
wanting penises?

366
00:18:04,770 --> 00:18:06,740
Because I'd like to weigh in.

367
00:18:13,810 --> 00:18:16,720
Dr. Koothrappali, would you care
to join the conversation?

368
00:18:16,720 --> 00:18:19,690
Certainly.
I'd like to raise two points.

369
00:18:19,690 --> 00:18:23,790
Number one, I think they are
talking about penises.

370
00:18:25,530 --> 00:18:30,100
And number two, these mimosas
are kicking my little brown ass.

371
00:18:32,700 --> 00:18:35,170
I'd like to kick
your little brown ass.

372
00:18:35,170 --> 00:18:36,600
What did I do?

373
00:18:36,600 --> 00:18:38,040
Oh, I don't know.

374
00:18:38,040 --> 00:18:39,640
Maybe when you walk
into a hotel room

375
00:18:39,640 --> 00:18:42,510
and you see a guy getting back
together with his girlfriend,

376
00:18:42,510 --> 00:18:44,840
you should consider doing
something other

377
00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:47,310
than crawling into
the adjoining bed.

378
00:18:47,310 --> 00:18:50,350
I did. You said no
Bridget Jones.

379
00:18:50,350 --> 00:18:53,090
We weren't getting
back together!

380
00:18:53,090 --> 00:18:55,820
It was a one-time thing!

381
00:18:55,820 --> 00:18:57,090
Excuse me.

382
00:18:57,090 --> 00:18:59,060
We're not taking comments
or questions

383
00:18:59,060 --> 00:19:00,730
from the audience just yet.

384
00:19:00,730 --> 00:19:03,230
Oh, shut up, Sheldon!

385
00:19:03,230 --> 00:19:05,430
Hi, bestie.

386
00:19:05,430 --> 00:19:06,700
All right,

387
00:19:06,700 --> 00:19:09,430
why don't we see if we can bring
this back to topic.

388
00:19:09,440 --> 00:19:11,170
Let me ask you
something, Bernie.

389
00:19:11,170 --> 00:19:12,570
I guess not.

390
00:19:12,570 --> 00:19:15,440
How would you feel if
you met my ex-girlfriend

391
00:19:15,440 --> 00:19:18,180
and she was like
Angelina Jolie?

392
00:19:18,180 --> 00:19:21,550
Oh, come on, Howard,
be realistic.

393
00:19:22,880 --> 00:19:28,420
What, I'm not hot enough
for Angelina Jolie?

394
00:19:28,420 --> 00:19:30,620
I'd like to weigh in here.

395
00:19:30,620 --> 00:19:32,160
No.

396
00:19:34,930 --> 00:19:36,430
All right,
why don't we open it up

397
00:19:36,430 --> 00:19:37,630
to Q&A from the audience?

398
00:19:37,630 --> 00:19:39,030
Yeah, I have a question.

399
00:19:39,030 --> 00:19:40,530
Is there anybody who can get me
the hell out of here

400
00:19:40,530 --> 00:19:43,700
and back to Los Angeles
tonight?

401
00:19:43,700 --> 00:19:46,510
I'm driving back to L.A. tonight.

402
00:19:48,540 --> 00:19:51,080
Penny, that's Glenn.
Glenn, that's Penny.

403
00:19:51,080 --> 00:19:52,940
No!

404
00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:04,920
Red Leader to Red Five.

405
00:20:04,920 --> 00:20:07,920
Red Leader
to Red Five.

406
00:20:07,930 --> 00:20:11,030
Anybody up for a little game?

407
00:20:11,800 --> 00:20:15,300
I spy with my little eye...

408
00:20:15,390 --> 00:20:18,460
a nonferrous metal.

409
00:20:22,500 --> 00:20:25,500
Must be out of range.

410
00:20:26,800 --> 00:20:28,800
Leonard, can I ask you
a question?

411
00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:30,200
Sure.

412
00:20:30,210 --> 00:20:32,510
Are you bothered by the fact
that your former girlfriend

413
00:20:32,510 --> 00:20:34,210
left the symposium
with what is probably

414
00:20:34,210 --> 00:20:38,250
the most beautiful man
I've ever seen in my life?

415
00:20:38,250 --> 00:20:40,310
No. Why do you ask?

416
00:20:40,320 --> 00:20:43,650
Because we're going
120 miles per hour.

417
00:20:45,250 --> 00:20:47,190
All right, if no one's going
to guess...

418
00:20:47,190 --> 00:20:51,290
I was spying the aluminum rims
on the police car

419
00:20:51,290 --> 00:20:52,960
we passed a few miles back.

420
00:20:58,920 --> 00:21:01,920
— Sync, corrected by elderman —
— for www.addic7ed.com —

421
00:21:01,920 --> 00:21:04,920
— Resync to The Big Bang Theory S04
720p BluRay x264-CLUE by lorez —