1
00:00:01,052 --> 00:00:02,668
Do you recall this conversation?

2
00:00:02,670 --> 00:00:05,021
"Leonard, want to go halfsies
on a steamer?"

3
00:00:05,023 --> 00:00:08,224
"No, Sheldon,
we don't need a steamer."

4
00:00:09,360 --> 00:00:11,611
Looks like that rumpled
chicken's come home to roost.

5
00:00:12,479 --> 00:00:13,846
Hi.

6
00:00:13,848 --> 00:00:15,365
Here are the make-up sponges
you asked for.

7
00:00:15,367 --> 00:00:17,634
Oh, thanks,
I thought I had more.

8
00:00:21,121 --> 00:00:23,406
Damn, you've got
more makeup than I do.

9
00:00:23,408 --> 00:00:26,326
You've got better makeup
than I do.

10
00:00:26,328 --> 00:00:28,244
Yeah, I'm borrowing this.

11
00:00:28,246 --> 00:00:29,329
Hey, hey, hey, hey.

12
00:00:29,331 --> 00:00:30,696
This is my Comic-Con makeup.

13
00:00:30,698 --> 00:00:32,916
I love you,
but there are some things

14
00:00:32,918 --> 00:00:34,801
a man doesn't share
with his girlfriend.

15
00:00:36,637 --> 00:00:38,054
That's a wise policy.

16
00:00:38,056 --> 00:00:39,705
I once borrowed
my sister's makeup

17
00:00:39,707 --> 00:00:40,890
for a costume contest.

18
00:00:40,892 --> 00:00:42,508
Got a terrible case of pinkeye.

19
00:00:42,510 --> 00:00:44,510
Yeah, but luckily,
I was going as a zombie.

20
00:00:44,512 --> 00:00:46,396
I won second place.

21
00:00:46,398 --> 00:00:49,515
I feel like you guys
just went to Comic-Con.

22
00:00:49,517 --> 00:00:50,549
That was San Diego Comic-Con.

23
00:00:50,551 --> 00:00:52,685
This is Bakersfield Comic-Con.

24
00:00:52,687 --> 00:00:54,354
Is that better?

25
00:00:54,356 --> 00:00:55,655
Well, it's a lot smaller.

26
00:00:55,657 --> 00:00:56,739
It's more about
the comic books.

27
00:00:56,741 --> 00:00:58,241
The way these
conventions used to be

28
00:00:58,243 --> 00:01:00,076
before they went
all Hollywood.

29
00:01:00,078 --> 00:01:03,029
So to answer your question,
no, it's not better.

30
00:01:04,164 --> 00:01:05,448
Well, then why are you going?

31
00:01:05,450 --> 00:01:07,350
It's a comic book convention.

32
00:01:07,352 --> 00:01:09,702
You know, it's like pizza
or particle accelerators,

33
00:01:09,704 --> 00:01:12,205
even the stinky one's
still pretty good.

34
00:01:12,207 --> 00:01:13,423
All right.

35
00:01:13,425 --> 00:01:14,424
Well, you guys have fun.

36
00:01:14,426 --> 00:01:15,574
I guess I'll see you
Sunday night.

37
00:01:15,576 --> 00:01:16,742
Yeah.
Okay.

38
00:01:16,744 --> 00:01:18,244
Oh, hang on a second.

39
00:01:18,246 --> 00:01:20,430
Hold this.

40
00:01:23,634 --> 00:01:25,551
What was that for?

41
00:01:25,553 --> 00:01:28,354
To show people
when they don't believe me.

42
00:01:54,010 --> 00:01:58,010
== sync, corrected by elderman ==

43
00:01:58,900 --> 00:01:59,983
Oh, this is the best.

44
00:01:59,985 --> 00:02:01,818
You have booze
with breakfast on a Tuesday,

45
00:02:01,820 --> 00:02:02,869
you got a problem.

46
00:02:02,871 --> 00:02:05,372
You do it on the weekend,
you got brunch.

47
00:02:05,374 --> 00:02:07,290
Sheldon doesn't believe
in brunch.

48
00:02:07,292 --> 00:02:08,775
He can't stand being at a table

49
00:02:08,777 --> 00:02:10,043
where one person's
having an omelet

50
00:02:10,045 --> 00:02:12,329
and another person's
having a sandwich.

51
00:02:12,331 --> 00:02:15,665
He's not exhausting at all.

52
00:02:17,252 --> 00:02:18,752
Oh.

53
00:02:18,754 --> 00:02:20,120
It's Leonard.

54
00:02:20,122 --> 00:02:22,422
he says they're on the road
and headed for Bakersfield

55
00:02:22,424 --> 00:02:23,840
at "warp speed."

56
00:02:23,842 --> 00:02:25,625
Maybe it's the mimosa,

57
00:02:25,627 --> 00:02:28,061
but I'm gonna give
the kid an LOL.

58
00:02:29,764 --> 00:02:31,064
It's cute how excited they are.

59
00:02:31,066 --> 00:02:32,265
You should have seen Howard

60
00:02:32,267 --> 00:02:34,067
sewing his costume all week
for the convention.

61
00:02:34,069 --> 00:02:36,019
When did Howard learn
to sew?

62
00:02:36,021 --> 00:02:37,654
When he was a little boy,
every couple months,

63
00:02:37,656 --> 00:02:39,573
he would have to let
his mom's pants out.

64
00:02:43,161 --> 00:02:45,946
I don't even understand why
they go to these conventions.

65
00:02:45,948 --> 00:02:48,198
I know. The four of them work
at a major university.

66
00:02:48,200 --> 00:02:49,199
They're all super smart.

67
00:02:49,201 --> 00:02:50,450
How can they still be
into something

68
00:02:50,452 --> 00:02:51,952
made for 12-year-olds?

69
00:02:51,954 --> 00:02:53,286
I don't mind it.

70
00:02:53,288 --> 00:02:55,572
I think Howie's just in touch
with his inner child.

71
00:02:55,574 --> 00:02:57,707
Although when he comes to bed
in his Batman pajamas,

72
00:02:57,709 --> 00:03:01,545
sometimes it feels like
I'm touching his inner child.

73
00:03:03,347 --> 00:03:05,632
It's probably because
they were bullied growing up.

74
00:03:05,634 --> 00:03:07,384
In a world
where you can't fight back,

75
00:03:07,386 --> 00:03:09,936
superheroes provide
meaningful wish-fulfillment.

76
00:03:11,106 --> 00:03:13,273
Now I feel bad for picking
on all those kids.

77
00:03:13,275 --> 00:03:14,724
Although, in my defense,

78
00:03:14,726 --> 00:03:17,110
if Danny Biffle didn't want
to eat a mouthful of dirt,

79
00:03:17,112 --> 00:03:21,031
he shouldn't have shown up
to school wearing a bow tie.

80
00:03:21,033 --> 00:03:23,400
I've never even read
a comic book. You guys?

81
00:03:23,402 --> 00:03:24,534
Uh-uh.
No.

82
00:03:24,536 --> 00:03:25,569
I mean, it's such an important

83
00:03:25,571 --> 00:03:26,536
part of their lives.

84
00:03:26,538 --> 00:03:28,121
Maybe we should try
reading some.

85
00:03:28,123 --> 00:03:30,540
Seriously?

86
00:03:30,542 --> 00:03:32,959
The comic book store
isn't far from here.

87
00:03:32,961 --> 00:03:35,328
That is an amazing idea.

88
00:03:35,330 --> 00:03:38,632
Okay, how many of these
have I had?

89
00:03:42,920 --> 00:03:45,338
I think you should turn
on the GPS.

90
00:03:45,340 --> 00:03:46,973
It is on.

91
00:03:46,975 --> 00:03:50,227
But the turn-by-turn
voice option isn't on.

92
00:03:50,229 --> 00:03:51,511
I know I'd feel more safe

93
00:03:51,513 --> 00:03:53,430
if you turn on the turn-by-turn
voice option.

94
00:03:53,432 --> 00:03:55,982
I love the turn-by-turn
voice option.

95
00:03:55,984 --> 00:04:00,220
Has it really only
been ten miles?

96
00:04:00,222 --> 00:04:02,856
I'm turning it on,
but just to shut you up.

97
00:04:04,391 --> 00:04:07,744
Leonard, bear left and continue

98
00:04:07,746 --> 00:04:10,030
on Interstate 210.

99
00:04:11,666 --> 00:04:14,084
Ooh, sounds like that fellow
knows what he's talking about.

100
00:04:14,086 --> 00:04:17,954
I'd put on my listening ears
if I were you.

101
00:04:17,956 --> 00:04:19,572
What did you do?

102
00:04:19,574 --> 00:04:21,458
I found a hack online.

103
00:04:21,460 --> 00:04:23,293
I was able to upload
MP3 recordings

104
00:04:23,295 --> 00:04:25,545
of my voice to your GPS.

105
00:04:25,547 --> 00:04:26,630
That is so cool.

106
00:04:26,632 --> 00:04:28,632
Counterpoint,
no, it's not.

107
00:04:28,634 --> 00:04:31,301
Continue on Interstate 210

108
00:04:31,303 --> 00:04:32,802
for five miles.

109
00:04:32,804 --> 00:04:37,474
Here's an interesting fact
about interstates.

110
00:04:37,476 --> 00:04:39,476
Really?

111
00:04:39,478 --> 00:04:41,978
Shh,
he said it's interesting.

112
00:04:41,980 --> 00:04:45,448
Interstates are numbered
as follows.

113
00:04:45,450 --> 00:04:48,485
Even-numbered routes
run east and west,

114
00:04:48,487 --> 00:04:50,987
odd-numbered routes

115
00:04:50,989 --> 00:04:52,989
run north and south.

116
00:04:54,575 --> 00:04:57,110
Three-digit route numbers
indicate bypasses

117
00:04:57,112 --> 00:05:00,247
or spurs.

118
00:05:00,249 --> 00:05:03,133
Look, Leonard,
there's a bridge.

119
00:05:03,135 --> 00:05:04,467
Drive off it.

120
00:05:04,469 --> 00:05:08,338
You know, we're not that far
from Vazquez Rocks.

121
00:05:08,340 --> 00:05:11,675
Oh, they shot a lot
of Star Trek episodes out there.

122
00:05:11,677 --> 00:05:13,843
We've got our costumes
in the trunk.

123
00:05:13,845 --> 00:05:16,429
We could go there
and have a little photo shoot.

124
00:05:16,431 --> 00:05:17,814
Great idea.

125
00:05:17,816 --> 00:05:20,183
I haven't had a carbohydrate
in two weeks.

126
00:05:20,185 --> 00:05:22,435
These cheekbones need
to be in front of a camera

127
00:05:22,437 --> 00:05:24,604
before I eat a pretzel
and they're gone.

128
00:05:25,406 --> 00:05:26,690
Yeah, that sounds fun.

129
00:05:26,692 --> 00:05:27,941
Oh, smashing.

130
00:05:27,943 --> 00:05:30,643
Now, Leonard,
do you know how to get there?

131
00:05:30,645 --> 00:05:31,243
No.

132
00:05:31,268 --> 00:05:33,447
Yeah, well luckily,
someone in the car does.

133
00:05:33,448 --> 00:05:35,248
Recalculating.

134
00:05:35,250 --> 00:05:38,251
While we're waiting,

135
00:05:38,253 --> 00:05:40,787
do you know
which president signed

136
00:05:40,789 --> 00:05:43,990
the Intestate Highway System Act
into law?

137
00:05:43,992 --> 00:05:47,827
The answer,
coming up in 14 miles.

138
00:05:47,829 --> 00:05:50,714
None of you will get it.

139
00:05:50,716 --> 00:05:52,882
It's Eisenhower.

140
00:06:05,980 --> 00:06:07,897
Why are they staring?

141
00:06:07,899 --> 00:06:10,233
Who cares?

142
00:06:10,235 --> 00:06:12,902
Just soak it in.

143
00:06:12,904 --> 00:06:15,121
Hello, boys.

144
00:06:16,824 --> 00:06:19,960
Oh, hey.

145
00:06:21,646 --> 00:06:23,396
Could you please stop staring?
They're just girls.

146
00:06:23,398 --> 00:06:27,133
It's nothing you haven't seen
in movies or in drawings.

147
00:06:28,836 --> 00:06:30,420
Hey, Stuart.

148
00:06:30,422 --> 00:06:31,421
Wh-What brings you guys here?

149
00:06:31,423 --> 00:06:32,872
We were looking
for a recommendation

150
00:06:32,874 --> 00:06:34,224
about comic books.

151
00:06:34,226 --> 00:06:35,442
Oh, well, I recommend

152
00:06:35,444 --> 00:06:37,677
you don't open a store
and sell them.

153
00:06:37,679 --> 00:06:38,995
No, we were just wondering

154
00:06:38,997 --> 00:06:40,647
why the guys like
this stuff so much,

155
00:06:40,649 --> 00:06:42,349
so we thought we'd
give it a try.

156
00:06:42,351 --> 00:06:44,434
Oh, okay. What do you think
you might be into?

157
00:06:44,436 --> 00:06:45,986
Superhero, fantasy,
graphic novels, manga...

158
00:06:45,988 --> 00:06:50,390
I swear
I will turn a hose on you.

159
00:06:54,195 --> 00:06:56,663
What kind of comics
do the guys like?

160
00:06:56,665 --> 00:06:58,298
Um, a litt bit of everything.

161
00:06:58,300 --> 00:07:00,116
Mostly superhero stuff.

162
00:07:00,118 --> 00:07:02,035
All right, well,
who's the best superhero?

163
00:07:02,037 --> 00:07:03,219
Shh!

164
00:07:03,221 --> 00:07:05,171
You can't ask a question
like that in here.

165
00:07:05,173 --> 00:07:07,841
Are you trying
to start a rumble?

166
00:07:07,843 --> 00:07:10,710
Well, what do you recommend?

167
00:07:10,712 --> 00:07:12,078
Well, uh, let's see.

168
00:07:12,080 --> 00:07:14,014
You've got your basic
clean-cut good guys...

169
00:07:14,016 --> 00:07:15,799
Superman, Spider-Man,
Captain America.

170
00:07:15,801 --> 00:07:18,702
Then you have
your darker anti-heroes...

171
00:07:18,704 --> 00:07:21,337
your Batman, your Wolverine,
Punisher.

172
00:07:21,339 --> 00:07:24,808
Ooh, I do love a bad boy.

173
00:07:24,810 --> 00:07:28,695
As evidenced by your boyfriend
and his fear of hamsters.

174
00:07:30,064 --> 00:07:33,483
If I were you,
I'd go for Fables number one.

175
00:07:33,485 --> 00:07:34,934
The artwork
is sophisticated,

176
00:07:34,936 --> 00:07:36,119
it's intelligently written,

177
00:07:36,121 --> 00:07:38,121
and it doesn't objectify
or stereotype women.

178
00:07:38,123 --> 00:07:39,322
Ooh, Thor!

179
00:07:39,324 --> 00:07:41,958
He's hot.

180
00:07:41,960 --> 00:07:44,544
Yeah, he kind of is.

181
00:07:49,116 --> 00:07:51,217
And we're blending,

182
00:07:51,219 --> 00:07:53,086
and we're blending,

183
00:07:53,088 --> 00:07:54,971
and we're done.

184
00:07:57,675 --> 00:08:01,177
I know Mr. Data
isn't supposed to smile,

185
00:08:01,179 --> 00:08:03,763
but here it comes.

186
00:08:06,350 --> 00:08:08,435
Come on, guys.

187
00:08:08,437 --> 00:08:10,019
Let's do this.

188
00:08:10,021 --> 00:08:13,323
Yeah, I'm sweating
my bald cap off.

189
00:08:16,827 --> 00:08:19,279
So what's our first
pose going to be?

190
00:08:19,281 --> 00:08:22,115
I say we begin with a classic
Star Trek fight scene.

191
00:08:22,117 --> 00:08:24,033
I'll set the timer.

192
00:08:29,673 --> 00:08:31,424
Sheldon,
how is that a fight pose?

193
00:08:31,426 --> 00:08:34,461
Mr. Data's weapon is his mind.

194
00:08:34,463 --> 00:08:36,096
I'm wielding it.

195
00:08:43,822 --> 00:08:46,172
Phasers on the Borg!

196
00:08:48,660 --> 00:08:50,443
Charlie's Angels.

197
00:08:54,583 --> 00:08:55,482
Okay, what's next?

198
00:08:55,484 --> 00:08:56,649
Now let's do

199
00:08:56,651 --> 00:08:58,184
some sexy glamour shots.

200
00:08:58,186 --> 00:08:59,352
I'll set the mood.

201
00:08:59,354 --> 00:09:01,571
Oontz, oontz, oontz, oontz...

202
00:09:01,573 --> 00:09:05,241
oontz, oontz, oontz, oontz,
oontz, oontz, oontz, oontz...

203
00:09:05,243 --> 00:09:08,128
oontz, oontz, oontz,
oontz, oontz, oontz, oontz.

204
00:09:08,130 --> 00:09:10,296
Yeah, nice one.

205
00:09:10,298 --> 00:09:11,881
Oontz, oontz, oontz.

206
00:09:11,883 --> 00:09:13,583
That's right.

207
00:09:13,585 --> 00:09:14,584
Oontz, oontz, oontz.

208
00:09:15,804 --> 00:09:17,170
Oh, my God.

209
00:09:17,172 --> 00:09:19,005
Leonard,
someone's stealing your car!

210
00:09:19,007 --> 00:09:21,207
What? Hey, hey!

211
00:09:21,209 --> 00:09:22,842
Come back here!
Stop!

212
00:09:22,844 --> 00:09:26,212
Stealing is against the law!

213
00:09:26,214 --> 00:09:29,265
I don't believe this.

214
00:09:29,267 --> 00:09:30,900
Son of a bitch.

215
00:09:30,902 --> 00:09:32,552
I'll call 911.

216
00:09:32,554 --> 00:09:33,653
Wha...

217
00:09:33,655 --> 00:09:35,855
Oh, no, my phone is
in my other pants.

218
00:09:35,857 --> 00:09:37,607
Oh, so is mine.
Mine, too.

219
00:09:37,609 --> 00:09:39,192
Anybody got any ideas?

220
00:09:39,194 --> 00:09:40,610
Nope.

221
00:09:40,612 --> 00:09:43,279
The only thing left to
do now is assign blame.

222
00:09:43,281 --> 00:09:45,448
Nice going.

223
00:09:54,626 --> 00:09:56,994
What kind of a person steals
another person's car

224
00:09:56,996 --> 00:09:58,462
in broad daylight?

225
00:09:58,464 --> 00:10:01,048
What kind of person
leaves his keys in the car?

226
00:10:01,050 --> 00:10:03,350
I thought we agreed this was
all Koothrappali's fault.

227
00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:04,602
You're right.

228
00:10:04,604 --> 00:10:07,021
Nice going.

229
00:10:07,023 --> 00:10:08,839
Car.

230
00:10:16,114 --> 00:10:17,264
What is wrong with people?

231
00:10:17,266 --> 00:10:18,399
Why don't they stop?

232
00:10:18,401 --> 00:10:19,867
Maybe we're better off.

233
00:10:19,869 --> 00:10:22,653
What if we were to get in a car
with a crazy person?

234
00:10:22,655 --> 00:10:24,321
Look at us, Sheldon.

235
00:10:24,323 --> 00:10:25,873
We're the crazy people.

236
00:10:28,627 --> 00:10:31,161
Well, perhaps we should
hold up a sign

237
00:10:31,163 --> 00:10:35,382
that assures passing motorists
of our mental competence.

238
00:10:35,384 --> 00:10:37,334
Good idea.

239
00:10:37,336 --> 00:10:39,637
Why don't you
get started on that?

240
00:10:40,472 --> 00:10:42,706
Come on,
let's just start walking.

241
00:10:42,708 --> 00:10:45,092
There's got to be a gas station
or something nearby.

242
00:10:45,094 --> 00:10:46,760
What, you think just
because you're wearing

243
00:10:46,762 --> 00:10:49,063
a captain's uniform,
you're in charge?

244
00:10:49,065 --> 00:10:51,148
Yes.

245
00:10:51,150 --> 00:10:53,133
All right.

246
00:11:03,161 --> 00:11:06,113
Hmm, okay, I'm done.

247
00:11:06,115 --> 00:11:08,082
How did you guys
finish so fast?

248
00:11:08,084 --> 00:11:10,167
I don't know,
there were a lot of pictures,

249
00:11:10,169 --> 00:11:14,288
and one page only had
the word "brakkadoom!"

250
00:11:14,290 --> 00:11:18,759
Yeah, well,
I have street smarts.

251
00:11:18,761 --> 00:11:20,778
So, what'd you guys think?

252
00:11:20,780 --> 00:11:23,931
Well, there was a lot of action,
Mmm.

253
00:11:23,933 --> 00:11:26,216
and the story moved along
at a brisk pace.

254
00:11:26,218 --> 00:11:28,135
It was, overall...

255
00:11:28,137 --> 00:11:30,253
what's the word I'm looking for?

256
00:11:30,255 --> 00:11:31,889
Stupid?
So stupid.

257
00:11:32,824 --> 00:11:34,024
I don't know how
Leonard can get

258
00:11:34,026 --> 00:11:35,142
so caught up in this.

259
00:11:35,144 --> 00:11:36,443
It's crazy; they spend hours

260
00:11:36,445 --> 00:11:38,595
arguing about things
that don't even exist.

261
00:11:38,597 --> 00:11:40,230
What a waste of time.
I know.

262
00:11:40,232 --> 00:11:42,800
A hammer so heavy that no
one else can pick it up?

263
00:11:44,654 --> 00:11:46,453
I don't think it's heavy.

264
00:11:46,455 --> 00:11:49,657
It's some sort of magic,
so only Thor can lift it.

265
00:11:49,659 --> 00:11:51,792
That makes even less
sense, I mean...

266
00:11:51,794 --> 00:11:56,380
No, no, no, it doesn't.

267
00:11:56,382 --> 00:11:57,531
Thor is a god.

268
00:11:57,533 --> 00:11:59,633
The hammer is his;
only he can use it.

269
00:11:59,635 --> 00:12:02,803
It's like Sheldon
and his toothbrush.

270
00:12:03,755 --> 00:12:06,473
Or his thin, beckoning lips.

271
00:12:07,792 --> 00:12:10,260
Okay, hang on, what if
Thor's hand is on the hammer?

272
00:12:10,262 --> 00:12:12,429
I mean, if he's touching it
with his god magic,

273
00:12:12,431 --> 00:12:13,964
does that mean I could lift it?

274
00:12:13,966 --> 00:12:16,684
No.
Yes.

275
00:12:16,686 --> 00:12:18,752
Well, which is it?

276
00:12:18,754 --> 00:12:21,155
Maybe we missed something.

277
00:12:21,157 --> 00:12:22,272
Let's read it again.

278
00:12:22,274 --> 00:12:24,541
Okay.
Yeah.

279
00:12:28,781 --> 00:12:31,248
You want some tea?

280
00:12:31,250 --> 00:12:32,249
Good idea.

281
00:12:32,251 --> 00:12:34,201
I'll help you.

282
00:12:34,203 --> 00:12:36,036
Wait, I thought we were reading.

283
00:12:36,038 --> 00:12:37,338
We are.

284
00:12:37,340 --> 00:12:41,175
We're just, uh,
giving you a head start.

285
00:12:49,884 --> 00:12:52,353
I wish my mom was here.

286
00:12:52,355 --> 00:12:56,673
We could all hang out
in her shadow.

287
00:12:56,675 --> 00:12:58,859
Wool pants in the desert.

288
00:12:58,861 --> 00:13:02,196
I feel like I've got
poached testicles.

289
00:13:04,115 --> 00:13:05,366
Oh, you poor thing;

290
00:13:05,368 --> 00:13:06,834
you're sweating.

291
00:13:06,836 --> 00:13:09,653
That's so much worse than
having your car stolen.

292
00:13:09,655 --> 00:13:11,722
Insurance is gonna buy you
a new car.

293
00:13:11,724 --> 00:13:14,958
It's not gonna
de-funk my junk.

294
00:13:14,960 --> 00:13:17,127
Gentlemen,

295
00:13:17,129 --> 00:13:18,912
a little less bellyaching.

296
00:13:18,914 --> 00:13:20,330
We're Starfleet officers

297
00:13:20,332 --> 00:13:22,466
and a member
of the Borg Collective.

298
00:13:22,468 --> 00:13:25,419
Please, Sheldon,
I am so not in the mood.

299
00:13:25,421 --> 00:13:29,039
Leonard,
all our lives we have dreamed

300
00:13:29,041 --> 00:13:30,307
of finding ourselves

301
00:13:30,309 --> 00:13:33,143
inside one of
the fantasy worlds we love.

302
00:13:33,145 --> 00:13:35,229
And look at us.

303
00:13:35,231 --> 00:13:36,980
At this moment, we are, in fact,

304
00:13:36,982 --> 00:13:39,149
a Star Trek landing party

305
00:13:39,151 --> 00:13:42,786
stranded in an alien
and unforgiving environment,

306
00:13:42,788 --> 00:13:45,656
relying only on our wits,
our fortitude

307
00:13:45,658 --> 00:13:47,324
and our moxie.

308
00:13:47,326 --> 00:13:49,726
As long as we have
those things,

309
00:13:49,728 --> 00:13:52,062
- nothing can stop...
- Nerds!

310
00:13:57,786 --> 00:13:59,953
I hate this planet.

311
00:14:05,627 --> 00:14:07,377
It says right here
on the hammer,

312
00:14:07,379 --> 00:14:10,013
"Whoever holds this hammer,
if he be worthy,

313
00:14:10,015 --> 00:14:11,799
shall possess
the power of Thor."

314
00:14:11,801 --> 00:14:13,517
Hold on,
who decides who's worthy?

315
00:14:13,519 --> 00:14:14,885
Does the hammer decide?

316
00:14:14,887 --> 00:14:16,220
Yes!
No!

317
00:14:17,972 --> 00:14:19,389
It can't decide.

318
00:14:19,391 --> 00:14:20,691
It's a hammer.

319
00:14:20,693 --> 00:14:22,259
You said it's a magic hammer.

320
00:14:22,261 --> 00:14:24,144
Yeah, it can't make decisions.

321
00:14:24,146 --> 00:14:25,729
If Harry Potter's wand
can make decisions,

322
00:14:25,731 --> 00:14:27,364
why can't Thor's hammer?

323
00:14:27,366 --> 00:14:30,067
Okay, if you're going to start
comparing wands and hammers,

324
00:14:30,069 --> 00:14:33,654
I can't even take you seriously.

325
00:14:50,805 --> 00:14:53,090
Hello.

326
00:14:53,092 --> 00:14:55,509
Hello.

327
00:14:56,427 --> 00:14:59,847
Uh, four glasses
of water, please.

328
00:14:59,849 --> 00:15:02,733
Anything for you guys?

329
00:15:02,735 --> 00:15:05,235
Can I use your phone?

330
00:15:05,237 --> 00:15:06,520
Our car got stolen.

331
00:15:06,522 --> 00:15:09,273
Why don't you ask Scotty
to beam you up?

332
00:15:11,277 --> 00:15:14,495
Scotty was on the
original series,

333
00:15:14,497 --> 00:15:17,197
and we're Next Generation.

334
00:15:17,199 --> 00:15:21,084
So... joke's on you.

335
00:15:24,155 --> 00:15:26,874
We're not with him.

336
00:15:30,612 --> 00:15:32,930
You can't pick something up
in outer space.

337
00:15:32,932 --> 00:15:35,299
In space, there is no up.

338
00:15:35,301 --> 00:15:38,835
Oh, yeah? Then how does
the sun come "up" every day?

339
00:15:40,121 --> 00:15:43,173
Hard to argue with those kind
of street smarts.

340
00:15:48,062 --> 00:15:50,280
Leonard and Sheldon have boxes
of comics across the hall.

341
00:15:50,282 --> 00:15:51,565
Why don't we go look at those?

342
00:15:51,567 --> 00:15:53,400
Oh, great! Yes!
And then you will see.

343
00:15:53,402 --> 00:15:55,953
I am not wrong, because
if we were in outer space,

344
00:15:55,955 --> 00:15:57,738
then anyone
could pick up the hammer

345
00:15:57,740 --> 00:15:59,172
because it would be
floating around

346
00:15:59,174 --> 00:16:00,457
in a weightless environment.

347
00:16:00,459 --> 00:16:02,692
Yeah, that's right, the
slow reader used science.

348
00:16:02,694 --> 00:16:04,111
Suck on that.

349
00:16:06,831 --> 00:16:08,966
Was there anything
valuable in the car?

350
00:16:08,968 --> 00:16:11,835
Our clothes,
our wallets, phones.

351
00:16:11,837 --> 00:16:13,470
And about $300 worth of makeup,

352
00:16:13,472 --> 00:16:16,790
so this thief could look like
anyone right now.

353
00:16:16,792 --> 00:16:18,976
Makeup?

354
00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:21,211
Sure.

355
00:16:22,597 --> 00:16:25,649
Uh, we're going to the Comic-Con
in Bakersfield.

356
00:16:25,651 --> 00:16:27,717
They have a big costume contest.

357
00:16:28,386 --> 00:16:30,988
It's cooler than it sounds.

358
00:16:30,990 --> 00:16:34,992
I don't know,
sounds pretty cool.

359
00:16:34,994 --> 00:16:36,827
I-It is.

360
00:16:36,829 --> 00:16:38,028
It's not just comic books.

361
00:16:38,030 --> 00:16:39,613
They've got
action figures, toys,

362
00:16:39,615 --> 00:16:41,331
a Tron-themed dance party...

363
00:16:41,333 --> 00:16:42,950
Okay, he gets how cool it is.

364
00:16:44,002 --> 00:16:45,869
I think I have all I need here.

365
00:16:45,871 --> 00:16:47,570
You guys need me
to call someone?

366
00:16:47,572 --> 00:16:50,573
I'm guessing your moms?

367
00:16:51,726 --> 00:16:54,361
Thanks,
but we've got it covered.

368
00:16:54,363 --> 00:16:57,580
Okay,
I just talked to my mom.

369
00:17:00,635 --> 00:17:02,919
She arranged for us
to get a rental car.

370
00:17:02,921 --> 00:17:04,087
Great.

371
00:17:04,089 --> 00:17:05,722
We can still make it
to Comic-Con.

372
00:17:05,724 --> 00:17:07,024
Are you kidding me?

373
00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:09,226
After all we've been through,
I just want to go home.

374
00:17:09,228 --> 00:17:10,593
Don't be like that.

375
00:17:10,595 --> 00:17:11,945
Come on, Howard,
talk to him.

376
00:17:11,947 --> 00:17:13,447
I'm with Leonard.

377
00:17:13,449 --> 00:17:15,432
I'm done.

378
00:17:15,434 --> 00:17:18,118
Fine, then I guess
it's two against two.

379
00:17:18,120 --> 00:17:19,486
How do we decide?

380
00:17:19,488 --> 00:17:23,407
Actually,
it's three against one.

381
00:17:23,409 --> 00:17:24,774
What?

382
00:17:24,776 --> 00:17:25,909
What about the mission?

383
00:17:25,911 --> 00:17:27,711
You said we were
a real-life landing party.

384
00:17:27,713 --> 00:17:29,529
Yeah, well, we're not.

385
00:17:29,531 --> 00:17:31,248
We're an imaginary landing party

386
00:17:31,250 --> 00:17:33,800
who had real-life garbage
thrown at us

387
00:17:33,802 --> 00:17:36,553
by real-life strangers
who think we're idiots.

388
00:17:37,755 --> 00:17:39,089
And to tell you the truth,

389
00:17:39,091 --> 00:17:41,391
I'm starting to feel like one.

390
00:17:41,393 --> 00:17:43,960
I want to go home now.

391
00:17:43,962 --> 00:17:46,263
Okay.

392
00:17:46,265 --> 00:17:50,017
Did we at least rent the car
from Enterprise?

393
00:17:53,104 --> 00:17:55,072
Get it? Enterprise?

394
00:17:56,307 --> 00:17:58,975
Screw you. That's funny.

395
00:18:01,579 --> 00:18:03,530
Well, what if the
Hulk picked up Thor

396
00:18:03,532 --> 00:18:05,482
while Thor is
holding the hammer?

397
00:18:05,484 --> 00:18:06,783
Yeah?

398
00:18:06,785 --> 00:18:07,984
Then by the transitive property

399
00:18:07,986 --> 00:18:11,121
of picking things up,
Hulk picked up the hammer.

400
00:18:12,173 --> 00:18:13,290
No.

401
00:18:13,292 --> 00:18:15,292
Hulk picked up Thor,
Thor picked up the hammer.

402
00:18:15,294 --> 00:18:16,376
Okay, hang on.

403
00:18:16,378 --> 00:18:18,345
If I go to a bar
and pick up a guy,

404
00:18:18,347 --> 00:18:20,464
and he picks up a girl,
and then we all leave together,

405
00:18:20,466 --> 00:18:22,499
did I pick up the girl?

406
00:18:26,087 --> 00:18:29,339
Did that ever happen?

407
00:18:29,341 --> 00:18:33,060
Hey, are we talking about me
or are we talking about Thor?

408
00:18:39,951 --> 00:18:43,787
Well, I say that's the last time
we ever go outside.

409
00:18:43,789 --> 00:18:45,072
Look, right here.

410
00:18:45,074 --> 00:18:46,957
Red Hulk is picking
up Thor's hammer

411
00:18:46,959 --> 00:18:48,408
'cause Thor's touching it.

412
00:18:48,410 --> 00:18:50,877
No, it's because
they're in space.

413
00:18:50,879 --> 00:18:52,362
He's really
just touching the strap.

414
00:18:52,364 --> 00:18:54,531
The strap is part
of the hammer!

415
00:18:54,533 --> 00:18:56,466
No, it's not!

416
00:18:56,468 --> 00:18:59,536
Are they actually arguing
about comic books?

417
00:18:59,538 --> 00:19:01,054
No, that can't be right.

418
00:19:01,056 --> 00:19:02,923
Maybe "Thor's Hammer"

419
00:19:02,925 --> 00:19:06,810
is a new color of nail polish.

420
00:19:06,812 --> 00:19:08,478
Then Red Hulk must be worthy.

421
00:19:08,480 --> 00:19:10,480
How could
Red Hulk be worthy?

422
00:19:10,482 --> 00:19:12,766
You don't know his life!

423
00:19:16,020 --> 00:19:19,222
There's only one
logical explanation.

424
00:19:19,224 --> 00:19:21,358
Somewhere in the desert
we crossed

425
00:19:21,360 --> 00:19:23,693
into an alternate dimension...

426
00:19:23,695 --> 00:19:25,061
where the women in our lives

427
00:19:25,063 --> 00:19:28,031
can finally appreciate
great literature.

428
00:19:29,233 --> 00:19:31,601
If it's an
alternate dimension...

429
00:19:31,603 --> 00:19:35,005
sounds like a job
for a landing party.

430
00:19:39,343 --> 00:19:41,678
Captain,
what are your orders?

431
00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:44,514
I say we investigate.

432
00:19:48,252 --> 00:19:49,636
Wait.

433
00:19:51,639 --> 00:19:53,807
They might be hostile.

434
00:19:56,144 --> 00:19:57,760
Fine, but set them to stun.

435
00:19:57,762 --> 00:19:59,095
If we vaporize Penny,

436
00:19:59,097 --> 00:20:01,064
I'll never find a girlfriend
that pretty again.

437
00:20:13,613 --> 00:20:15,113
Fun fact:

438
00:20:15,115 --> 00:20:19,600
President Eisenhower signed
the Federal Aid Highway Act

439
00:20:19,602 --> 00:20:22,203
from his hospital room.

440
00:20:22,298 --> 00:20:25,349
Wow, that is interesting.

441
00:20:26,435 --> 00:20:29,803
You learn something new
every day.

442
00:20:29,805 --> 00:20:32,222
Say, can you
name the four state capitols

443
00:20:32,224 --> 00:20:35,108
that are not served
by the interstate system?

444
00:20:35,110 --> 00:20:38,762
Ooh, another quiz.
Yes!

445
00:20:38,862 --> 00:20:43,862
== sync, corrected by elderman ==