1
00:00:00,168 --> 00:00:02,666
I'm thinking
about growing a goatee.

2
00:00:02,668 --> 00:00:04,283
Oh, actually that's a Van Dyke.

3
00:00:04,285 --> 00:00:06,116
A goatee is
just hair on the chin.

4
00:00:06,118 --> 00:00:09,183
Oh. Wait, then what is it
if you just have hair up here?

5
00:00:09,185 --> 00:00:10,167
You mean a moustache?

6
00:00:10,169 --> 00:00:12,416
Moo-stache!
He said it!

7
00:00:12,418 --> 00:00:14,716
Ha-ha, very funny.
Make fun of the foreign guy.

8
00:00:14,718 --> 00:00:16,666
For your information, there
are four times as many

9
00:00:16,668 --> 00:00:19,416
Indians as there are Americans,
so the way we say it is right.

10
00:00:19,418 --> 00:00:20,666
Say what?
Moo-stache.

11
00:00:20,668 --> 00:00:22,017
Moo-stache!
He said "moo-stache".

12
00:00:23,417 --> 00:00:25,283
Guys, you're
being childish.

13
00:00:25,285 --> 00:00:27,116
Yeah, she's right.
You're grown men,

14
00:00:27,118 --> 00:00:28,616
the kind who are
perfectly capable

15
00:00:28,618 --> 00:00:31,116
of growing your
own moo-staches.

16
00:00:32,218 --> 00:00:36,050
Hey, you were funny
on purpose... good job.

17
00:00:36,052 --> 00:00:38,466
Hi. Sorry I'm late...
I was at an audition.

18
00:00:38,468 --> 00:00:41,050
Oh, I'm sorry.
You'll get 'em next time.

19
00:00:42,450 --> 00:00:46,150
How about instead of assuming I
failed, you ask me how it went?

20
00:00:46,152 --> 00:00:47,800
Sorry. How did it go?

21
00:00:47,802 --> 00:00:49,716
Just shut up.

22
00:00:49,718 --> 00:00:51,200
Here, you can
have your seat.

23
00:00:51,202 --> 00:00:53,783
No, no, no, stay there.
I'm fine on the floor.

24
00:00:53,785 --> 00:00:56,300
Have you guys ever thought about
getting a dining room table?

25
00:00:56,302 --> 00:00:58,716
Yeah. You actually do have
room for one up there.

26
00:00:58,718 --> 00:01:01,833
Oh, sure, I sit on the floor
for years, no one cares.

27
00:01:01,835 --> 00:01:03,383
The pretty white girl's
there ten seconds,

28
00:01:03,385 --> 00:01:05,750
and suddenly we're
all running to IKEA:

29
00:01:07,218 --> 00:01:08,666
No one is
running anywhere.

30
00:01:08,668 --> 00:01:10,583
We're not getting
a dining room table.

31
00:01:10,585 --> 00:01:12,300
I know you don't
like change,

32
00:01:12,302 --> 00:01:13,716
but it's not a terrible idea.

33
00:01:13,718 --> 00:01:15,499
Yeah, you guys never use
that space up there.

34
00:01:15,501 --> 00:01:16,650
Why not get a table?

35
00:01:16,652 --> 00:01:18,566
Do you want the long answer
or the short answer?

36
00:01:18,568 --> 00:01:21,116
Hey, how come we never
get that option?

37
00:01:22,301 --> 00:01:25,416
Chaos theory suggests that
even in a deterministic system,

38
00:01:25,418 --> 00:01:28,466
if the equations describing
its behavior are nonlinear,

39
00:01:28,468 --> 00:01:30,967
a tiny change
in the initial conditions

40
00:01:30,969 --> 00:01:34,449
can lead to a cataclysmic
and unpredictable result.

41
00:01:34,451 --> 00:01:35,967
Translation?

42
00:01:35,969 --> 00:01:39,217
Waah. I don't want a table!

43
00:02:05,906 --> 00:02:10,901
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man

44
00:02:10,927 --> 00:02:13,675
Hey, Penny and I are gonna go
shop for a dining room table.

45
00:02:13,677 --> 00:02:15,009
You want to come with us?

46
00:02:15,011 --> 00:02:16,625
You know, I'd love to,

47
00:02:16,627 --> 00:02:18,308
but, um,
I'm too busy

48
00:02:18,310 --> 00:02:22,409
falling back in love
with Windows 98.

49
00:02:23,510 --> 00:02:25,642
Seriously? You haven't used
this desk in years.

50
00:02:25,644 --> 00:02:29,026
The second I want to get rid
of it, you're up here working?

51
00:02:29,028 --> 00:02:30,209
I can't talk right now...

52
00:02:30,211 --> 00:02:33,325
I have several thousand updates
to install.

53
00:02:33,327 --> 00:02:35,243
Are you really
gonna sit here all day?

54
00:02:35,245 --> 00:02:37,492
Think of me as Arthur Dent

55
00:02:37,494 --> 00:02:39,825
in Hitchhiker's Guide
to the Galaxy,

56
00:02:39,827 --> 00:02:43,159
lying in front of the bulldozers
to protect his home.

57
00:02:43,161 --> 00:02:44,509
If you'll recall,
the Vogon fleet

58
00:02:44,511 --> 00:02:46,575
blew up the Earth anyway.
It's a made-up story,

59
00:02:46,577 --> 00:02:50,292
Leonard... I don't even know
why you're talking about it.

60
00:02:50,294 --> 00:02:51,842
I'm putting all this
stuff in storage.

61
00:02:51,844 --> 00:02:53,325
We don't need
any of it.

62
00:02:53,327 --> 00:02:55,176
You... How can you say that?

63
00:02:55,178 --> 00:02:58,342
You show me one thing
in here we can live without.

64
00:02:58,344 --> 00:03:00,592
Oh, hang on.

65
00:03:03,326 --> 00:03:05,592
Check your in-box.

66
00:03:07,160 --> 00:03:09,759
Wait. Is this
really worth it?

67
00:03:09,761 --> 00:03:11,525
We've lived together

68
00:03:11,527 --> 00:03:13,709
for years with nary an argument.

69
00:03:13,711 --> 00:03:15,126
Huh?

70
00:03:15,128 --> 00:03:16,959
But we start talking
about a table,

71
00:03:16,961 --> 00:03:19,592
and suddenly we're
at each other's throats.

72
00:03:20,343 --> 00:03:22,876
"Nary an argument"?

73
00:03:24,077 --> 00:03:26,292
"Nary"?

74
00:03:26,294 --> 00:03:29,709
Well, that means "not
one," or "not any".

75
00:03:30,843 --> 00:03:33,375
Maybe instead of a table,
you should buy a dictionary.

76
00:03:35,127 --> 00:03:37,709
Well, I don't know
if I won that,

77
00:03:37,711 --> 00:03:40,093
but at least he's upset.

78
00:03:41,259 --> 00:03:42,792
Check it out.

79
00:03:45,161 --> 00:03:47,042
Magic wand TV remote!

80
00:03:47,044 --> 00:03:49,842
Yeah, I can
control all sorts of stuff.

81
00:03:49,844 --> 00:03:51,542
Did Bernadette
think it was cool?

82
00:03:51,544 --> 00:03:54,992
Not when I said "mute"
and pointed it at her face.

83
00:03:54,994 --> 00:03:56,659
Oh, uh, let me try.

84
00:03:56,661 --> 00:03:58,342
Uh...

85
00:03:58,344 --> 00:04:00,325
channelis changeroni!

86
00:04:01,994 --> 00:04:05,592
This might be my second
favorite brown magic wand.

87
00:04:09,927 --> 00:04:14,026
Well, that's the last
time I play with that.

88
00:04:16,627 --> 00:04:18,525
I have to take this.

89
00:04:18,527 --> 00:04:20,292
Hello?

90
00:04:20,294 --> 00:04:21,292
Uh...

91
00:04:21,294 --> 00:04:22,992
off.

92
00:04:22,994 --> 00:04:24,709
And on.

93
00:04:24,711 --> 00:04:26,525
And the Oprah Network.

94
00:04:26,527 --> 00:04:31,459
This is so much better than
watching TV like a muggle.

95
00:04:31,461 --> 00:04:33,425
Okay. Thank you.

96
00:04:33,427 --> 00:04:35,325
We'll be in touch.

97
00:04:37,128 --> 00:04:39,325
You're not gonna
believe this.

98
00:04:39,327 --> 00:04:41,093
What's going on?

99
00:04:41,095 --> 00:04:43,842
Oh. Wait.

100
00:04:43,844 --> 00:04:45,642
On!

101
00:04:45,644 --> 00:04:48,126
And off!

102
00:04:48,128 --> 00:04:50,258
What's going on?

103
00:04:53,094 --> 00:04:55,158
That was NASA:

104
00:04:55,160 --> 00:04:59,125
They want me to go
back up to the space station.

105
00:04:59,127 --> 00:05:01,675
Wow. What did
you tell them?

106
00:05:01,677 --> 00:05:03,342
I told them
I'd be honored.

107
00:05:03,344 --> 00:05:06,675
A second trip to space...
I'll miss you.

108
00:05:06,677 --> 00:05:08,692
And I'm gonna
miss you, too.

109
00:05:08,694 --> 00:05:10,142
I just want you
to know, I'm happy

110
00:05:10,144 --> 00:05:11,609
to look in on Bernadette
while you're gone.

111
00:05:11,611 --> 00:05:13,242
Thank you.
And if anything were to happen

112
00:05:13,244 --> 00:05:16,325
to you, we will name
our firstborn son Howard.

113
00:05:17,326 --> 00:05:19,258
I'm just kidding.

114
00:05:19,260 --> 00:05:21,592
We'll name him Dalib,
after my grandfather.

115
00:05:24,043 --> 00:05:26,092
Ooh, this one looks nice.

116
00:05:26,094 --> 00:05:27,592
No. Sheldon doesn't like

117
00:05:27,594 --> 00:05:30,208
reclaimed wood.

118
00:05:30,210 --> 00:05:31,492
Why not?

119
00:05:31,494 --> 00:05:35,175
He's afraid the original owners
will come back.

120
00:05:35,177 --> 00:05:37,926
Yeah. Well, Sheldon's not here.

121
00:05:37,928 --> 00:05:39,842
Well, he is here.

122
00:05:39,844 --> 00:05:41,492
So unless you want
to dig him out

123
00:05:41,494 --> 00:05:43,042
with a bone saw
and a melon baller,

124
00:05:43,044 --> 00:05:44,926
there's nothing
I can do about it.

125
00:05:44,928 --> 00:05:46,842
All right, sweetie,
you're paying for this table,

126
00:05:46,844 --> 00:05:49,325
and it's your apartment, too.
I know, but...

127
00:05:49,327 --> 00:05:52,659
No buts. You got to stop
letting him boss you around.

128
00:05:52,661 --> 00:05:56,009
You're right. I mean, h-he
decides what TV shows we watch,

129
00:05:56,011 --> 00:05:58,459
what food we eat,
who my favorite hobbit is...

130
00:05:58,461 --> 00:06:00,825
I wanted Frodo, but we
can't both have Frodo,

131
00:06:00,827 --> 00:06:04,009
so guess who's stuck
with Samwise Gamgee.

132
00:06:04,011 --> 00:06:06,092
See? Right there.
You're a grown man,

133
00:06:06,094 --> 00:06:08,992
you should be able to pick
whichever hobbit you want.

134
00:06:10,326 --> 00:06:13,459
Wish you wouldn't, but
one problem at a time.

135
00:06:13,461 --> 00:06:17,092
Y-You make a lot of sense.

136
00:06:17,094 --> 00:06:19,992
I like this table,
and I'm getting it.

137
00:06:19,994 --> 00:06:22,258
Really? This one?

138
00:06:24,042 --> 00:06:25,575
That one?

139
00:06:25,577 --> 00:06:27,292
Damn right
I like that one.

140
00:06:31,511 --> 00:06:33,459
Hey.
Good news.

141
00:06:33,461 --> 00:06:37,342
Someone in this room
gets to take a ride on a rocket.

142
00:06:37,344 --> 00:06:40,575
Fine. Can I at least
shower first?

143
00:06:40,577 --> 00:06:42,092
No, not that.

144
00:06:42,094 --> 00:06:44,625
Although you already agreed
to it, so no take-backs.

145
00:06:44,627 --> 00:06:46,225
What are you
talking about?

146
00:06:46,227 --> 00:06:48,225
Sit down.

147
00:06:48,227 --> 00:06:50,375
NASA called.

148
00:06:50,377 --> 00:06:53,825
The telescope mount I
installed on the space station

149
00:06:53,827 --> 00:06:55,459
got damaged,

150
00:06:55,461 --> 00:06:58,242
and they want me to go
back up and fix it.

151
00:06:59,159 --> 00:07:00,542
Wow.

152
00:07:00,544 --> 00:07:02,709
Well, what did you say?

153
00:07:02,711 --> 00:07:05,425
What do you think
I...? I said yes!

154
00:07:05,427 --> 00:07:06,575
Why do you look
surprised?

155
00:07:06,577 --> 00:07:08,258
Well, it's just,
after last time,

156
00:07:08,260 --> 00:07:10,325
I didn't think you'd
ever want to go back.

157
00:07:10,327 --> 00:07:11,375
Are you kidding?

158
00:07:11,377 --> 00:07:13,492
It was the greatest
experience of my life.

159
00:07:13,494 --> 00:07:16,709
Really? 'Cause I kind of
remember a lot of complaining

160
00:07:16,711 --> 00:07:19,092
and wishing for it
to be over.

161
00:07:19,094 --> 00:07:21,158
I think you have
me confused

162
00:07:21,160 --> 00:07:24,325
with what's gonna happen when
you get out of that shower.

163
00:07:28,343 --> 00:07:31,125
Hey, all set.
What do you think?

164
00:07:31,127 --> 00:07:32,525
There's plenty of room
for everybody,

165
00:07:32,527 --> 00:07:33,759
a view out the window.

166
00:07:33,761 --> 00:07:36,175
My spot on the couch has
a great view of a window.

167
00:07:36,177 --> 00:07:37,492
Sometimes I can see

168
00:07:37,494 --> 00:07:38,892
space battles through it.

169
00:07:38,894 --> 00:07:40,459
It's called a TV.

170
00:07:41,860 --> 00:07:44,926
Give it a chance, Sheldon;
you might actually like it.

171
00:07:45,826 --> 00:07:47,625
You're absolutely right.

172
00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:51,158
Nope.

173
00:07:53,343 --> 00:07:56,325
Well, you can't say he
didn't give it a fair shot.

174
00:07:56,327 --> 00:07:57,659
So,
when can we get rid of it?

175
00:07:58,160 --> 00:07:59,125
We're not.

176
00:07:59,127 --> 00:08:01,092
What about
the roommate agreement?

177
00:08:01,094 --> 00:08:02,342
It specifically
states

178
00:08:02,344 --> 00:08:03,842
that any changes in furnishing

179
00:08:03,844 --> 00:08:06,208
have to be approved
by the Furnishing Committee.

180
00:08:06,210 --> 00:08:08,509
Which only sits
on alternate years.

181
00:08:08,511 --> 00:08:09,991
Yeah, and
by the way,

182
00:08:09,993 --> 00:08:11,825
it sits over there.

183
00:08:11,827 --> 00:08:13,625
Come on,
that is ridiculous.

184
00:08:13,627 --> 00:08:15,459
She's right...
a committee that important

185
00:08:15,461 --> 00:08:17,659
should meet more often.

186
00:08:17,661 --> 00:08:19,058
That's not what I'm saying.

187
00:08:19,060 --> 00:08:21,759
Oh. This is the thing
about me standing up to him

188
00:08:21,761 --> 00:08:23,492
and not letting him
run my life?

189
00:08:23,494 --> 00:08:24,709
Yes.

190
00:08:24,711 --> 00:08:26,459
That.

191
00:08:26,461 --> 00:08:29,592
Okay. I think we've
found the problem here.

192
00:08:29,594 --> 00:08:31,492
It's not the table at all.

193
00:08:31,494 --> 00:08:32,908
It's you.

194
00:08:32,910 --> 00:08:34,158
Me?

195
00:08:34,160 --> 00:08:36,492
Well, it's always me...
take one for the team.

196
00:08:36,494 --> 00:08:38,225
I have
spent years

197
00:08:38,227 --> 00:08:40,509
turning this lump of clay
into an acceptable conduit

198
00:08:40,511 --> 00:08:41,975
for my will,

199
00:08:41,977 --> 00:08:44,459
and then you came along
and reshaped him,

200
00:08:44,461 --> 00:08:47,876
with your newfangled ideas
and your fancy genitals.

201
00:08:47,878 --> 00:08:51,092
Are you gonna let him
talk to me like this?

202
00:08:51,094 --> 00:08:53,375
"Fancy" sounds
like a compliment.

203
00:08:53,377 --> 00:08:55,709
Okay, I have not tried
to change Leonard.

204
00:08:55,711 --> 00:08:57,459
That's just what happens
in relationships.

205
00:08:57,461 --> 00:08:59,509
Look how much
Amy's changed you.

206
00:08:59,511 --> 00:09:01,392
That's not true.
Oh, please.

207
00:09:01,394 --> 00:09:03,425
When I first met you,
you were incapable

208
00:09:03,427 --> 00:09:04,958
of touching another human being.

209
00:09:04,960 --> 00:09:06,709
Now you're holding
hands, you're going

210
00:09:06,711 --> 00:09:09,625
on dates, you even
made out with her on a train.

211
00:09:09,627 --> 00:09:11,509
She told you?

212
00:09:11,511 --> 00:09:13,542
Of course she told me... it's
the most interesting thing

213
00:09:13,544 --> 00:09:15,675
that's ever happened to
her in her entire life!

214
00:09:16,659 --> 00:09:18,008
You're too close to it,

215
00:09:18,010 --> 00:09:20,658
but Amy has had
a huge impact on you.

216
00:09:21,510 --> 00:09:23,025
You're right.

217
00:09:23,027 --> 00:09:25,842
Without realizing it,
I've allowed that woman

218
00:09:25,844 --> 00:09:27,826
to alter my personality.

219
00:09:27,828 --> 00:09:29,825
Mm, Sheldon, you didn't
have a personality;

220
00:09:29,827 --> 00:09:33,826
you just had some shows
you liked.

221
00:09:33,828 --> 00:09:35,392
No.

222
00:09:35,394 --> 00:09:37,092
No, I've changed.

223
00:09:37,094 --> 00:09:39,709
Like the frog who's put
in a pot of water

224
00:09:39,711 --> 00:09:41,325
that's heated so gradually

225
00:09:41,327 --> 00:09:42,875
he doesn't realize
he's boiling to death.

226
00:09:42,877 --> 00:09:45,492
Or you're the frog who's
been kissed by a princess

227
00:09:45,494 --> 00:09:47,092
and turned into
a prince.

228
00:09:47,094 --> 00:09:49,958
Or you're just
a tall, annoying frog.

229
00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:51,542
Excuse me.

230
00:09:51,544 --> 00:09:54,192
I have to break up
with my girlfriend.

231
00:09:54,194 --> 00:09:56,008
Oh, Sheldon, wait.
No.

232
00:09:56,010 --> 00:09:58,425
You've opened my eyes
to the truth.

233
00:09:58,427 --> 00:10:01,158
Amy has made me
a more affectionate,

234
00:10:01,160 --> 00:10:02,925
open-minded person.

235
00:10:02,927 --> 00:10:05,258
And that stops now.

236
00:10:08,627 --> 00:10:10,991
Well, we should call her.
Yeah, mm-hmm.

237
00:10:12,511 --> 00:10:14,008
Amy, it's Penny. Hey.

238
00:10:14,010 --> 00:10:15,375
Just a little heads-up.

239
00:10:15,377 --> 00:10:18,008
Leonard bought a
dining room table.

240
00:10:18,010 --> 00:10:20,425
Yeah. Sheldon's
breaking up with you.

241
00:10:28,965 --> 00:10:32,148
Amy? Amy?

242
00:10:32,150 --> 00:10:33,765
Amy?

243
00:10:33,767 --> 00:10:35,797
I'll get right
to the point.

244
00:10:35,799 --> 00:10:37,064
I think we need

245
00:10:37,066 --> 00:10:39,381
to end this
relationship... so...

246
00:10:39,383 --> 00:10:40,648
just sign this

247
00:10:40,650 --> 00:10:42,081
with your finger, and, uh,

248
00:10:42,083 --> 00:10:44,131
please don't cry on my iPad...

249
00:10:44,133 --> 00:10:46,515
I didn't get AppleCare.

250
00:10:46,517 --> 00:10:49,398
I'm not surprised you want
to end the relationship.

251
00:10:49,400 --> 00:10:52,565
I'm a little surprised
you didn't get AppleCare.

252
00:10:53,798 --> 00:10:56,214
Anyway, enjoy your life.
Where do I sign?

253
00:10:56,216 --> 00:10:57,682
At the bottom.
I must say,

254
00:10:57,684 --> 00:11:00,164
I'm relieved you're not making
more of a scene out of this.

255
00:11:00,166 --> 00:11:02,064
Oh, I've already moved on.

256
00:11:02,066 --> 00:11:04,248
Besides, this breakup has
nothing to do with me.

257
00:11:04,250 --> 00:11:06,264
Wh... It doesn't?

258
00:11:06,266 --> 00:11:08,181
Of course not.
This is just Leonard

259
00:11:08,183 --> 00:11:11,014
trying to take the focus
off that dreadful table

260
00:11:11,016 --> 00:11:12,797
by sowing discord
in our relationship.

261
00:11:12,799 --> 00:11:15,348
He's manipulating you
like he always does.

262
00:11:15,350 --> 00:11:18,398
Wait-wait, now, hang on.

263
00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:20,764
You think he manipulates me?

264
00:11:20,766 --> 00:11:22,048
All the time.

265
00:11:22,050 --> 00:11:23,648
And he knew that,

266
00:11:23,650 --> 00:11:25,964
as your girlfriend,
I wasn't gonna stand by

267
00:11:25,966 --> 00:11:28,648
and let him bring a table
into your apartment.

268
00:11:28,650 --> 00:11:31,064
I mean, a table?
Come on!

269
00:11:32,516 --> 00:11:35,981
It is hideous.

270
00:11:35,983 --> 00:11:37,481
Well, thankfully,
I won't have to see it,

271
00:11:37,483 --> 00:11:39,121
'cause I won't be your
girlfriend anymore.

272
00:11:40,599 --> 00:11:42,064
Amy Farrah Fowler.

273
00:11:42,066 --> 00:11:45,348
Why, yes, I would like
to take a survey.

274
00:11:45,350 --> 00:11:47,064
Wait.

275
00:11:48,265 --> 00:11:49,764
You were really
gonna stand by me

276
00:11:49,766 --> 00:11:51,181
against the dining room table?

277
00:11:52,099 --> 00:11:54,314
Of course I was.

278
00:11:54,316 --> 00:11:55,964
Yeah, wait.

279
00:11:55,966 --> 00:11:59,831
How do I know that you're
not manipulating me right now?

280
00:11:59,833 --> 00:12:02,631
I think if I were
manipulating you,

281
00:12:02,633 --> 00:12:05,682
you'd be smart
enough to see it.

282
00:12:05,684 --> 00:12:07,814
How do I know
you're not saying that

283
00:12:07,816 --> 00:12:10,515
as part of the manipulation?

284
00:12:10,517 --> 00:12:14,014
I think you'd be smart
enough to see that, too.

285
00:12:15,382 --> 00:12:16,847
Okay.

286
00:12:18,132 --> 00:12:21,598
I'm sorry I gave you such a hard time...
I just had to be sure.

287
00:12:24,082 --> 00:12:25,298
It's pretty exciting

288
00:12:25,300 --> 00:12:27,631
that NASA wants
to send Howard back up.

289
00:12:27,633 --> 00:12:29,565
Yeah, exciting.

290
00:12:29,567 --> 00:12:31,681
Can I ask you something?

291
00:12:31,683 --> 00:12:32,931
Course.

292
00:12:32,933 --> 00:12:34,764
He hated that
entire experience.

293
00:12:34,766 --> 00:12:36,348
Does it make me
an awful wife

294
00:12:36,350 --> 00:12:38,481
if I don't think he
should do it again?

295
00:12:38,483 --> 00:12:39,631
Not at all.

296
00:12:39,633 --> 00:12:41,565
He's forgotten
how miserable he was

297
00:12:41,567 --> 00:12:43,314
the entire time he was up there.

298
00:12:43,316 --> 00:12:44,897
It's like me

299
00:12:44,899 --> 00:12:47,214
in those moments
when I miss India.

300
00:12:47,216 --> 00:12:49,064
So you'll talk to him?

301
00:12:49,066 --> 00:12:50,068
Why me?

302
00:12:50,093 --> 00:12:52,229
Well, I'm his wife;
I don't want to ruin it for him.

303
00:12:52,266 --> 00:12:55,398
That's the dynamic... I'm the
fun one, you're the buzzkill.

304
00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:57,598
Since when am I the buzzkill?

305
00:12:57,600 --> 00:12:59,348
Do you think this is cool?

306
00:12:59,350 --> 00:13:01,181
No, I think it's stupid.
Aha!

307
00:13:03,115 --> 00:13:05,448
You're right, it's great.

308
00:13:09,649 --> 00:13:11,164
Hello.
Oh, hey.

309
00:13:11,166 --> 00:13:12,781
You guys didn't break up.

310
00:13:12,783 --> 00:13:14,897
No. Sorry to disappoint you,

311
00:13:14,899 --> 00:13:16,647
but Amy pointed out that

312
00:13:16,649 --> 00:13:18,598
you we only trying
to manipulate me.

313
00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:19,847
Which you also
figured out by yourself.

314
00:13:19,849 --> 00:13:22,297
Which I also
figured out by myself.

315
00:13:23,182 --> 00:13:25,314
Well, I'm glad
you're still together.

316
00:13:25,316 --> 00:13:26,797
Yeah, okay,
you can stop trying

317
00:13:26,799 --> 00:13:28,181
to make this about
our relationship.

318
00:13:28,183 --> 00:13:31,064
Which is stronger than ever.
Which is stronger than ever.

319
00:13:31,798 --> 00:13:32,931
This is about you

320
00:13:32,933 --> 00:13:34,647
trying to change
my environment,

321
00:13:34,649 --> 00:13:36,731
which was perfect
the way it was.

322
00:13:36,733 --> 00:13:39,398
But it got the way it was
through change.

323
00:13:39,400 --> 00:13:41,264
The-the spot
that you love to sit in,

324
00:13:41,266 --> 00:13:44,565
that no one else can sit in,
only exists because...

325
00:13:44,567 --> 00:13:47,764
despite your objections...
I bought this couch.

326
00:13:47,766 --> 00:13:48,897
Me.

327
00:13:48,899 --> 00:13:50,897
So explain
why that change was bad

328
00:13:50,899 --> 00:13:52,764
and this change was good.

329
00:13:54,566 --> 00:13:56,431
Um...

330
00:13:56,433 --> 00:13:58,764
You don't need to
explain yourself to him.

331
00:13:58,766 --> 00:14:01,897
I don't need to explain
myself to you!

332
00:14:01,899 --> 00:14:04,597
You're sick of his nonsense
and ready to move in with me.

333
00:14:04,599 --> 00:14:06,681
Keep the table!
We don't use that space!

334
00:14:12,631 --> 00:14:14,847
Damn it, I got cocky.

335
00:14:17,232 --> 00:14:19,914
Hey, Bernie.
I'm home... Hello.

336
00:14:19,916 --> 00:14:21,297
Hi, honey.

337
00:14:21,299 --> 00:14:22,630
What's going on?

338
00:14:22,632 --> 00:14:24,881
Maybe you should
have a seat.

339
00:14:24,883 --> 00:14:26,797
Um... okay.

340
00:14:26,799 --> 00:14:29,847
I know my mom's not dead;
there'd be balloons.

341
00:14:30,932 --> 00:14:32,464
Um... okay. First off,

342
00:14:32,466 --> 00:14:35,681
know that we all love you
and cherish you.

343
00:14:35,683 --> 00:14:38,031
Well, I wouldn't...
Daddy.

344
00:14:38,033 --> 00:14:40,515
You're great.

345
00:14:41,482 --> 00:14:44,647
Can I say something?
Oh, of course.

346
00:14:46,548 --> 00:14:48,314
Hey, Fruit Loops.

347
00:14:48,316 --> 00:14:51,014
Massimino?
Why are you here?

348
00:14:51,016 --> 00:14:52,248
Well, I heard you were thinking

349
00:14:52,250 --> 00:14:53,981
about going back up
to the space station,

350
00:14:53,983 --> 00:14:56,148
and as someone
who's been there with you...

351
00:14:56,150 --> 00:14:59,014
well, you know how astronauts
need to have the "right stuff"?

352
00:14:59,016 --> 00:15:00,098
Sure.

353
00:15:00,100 --> 00:15:02,597
The stuff you have is wrong.

354
00:15:05,581 --> 00:15:08,614
You don't think
I did a good job up there?

355
00:15:08,616 --> 00:15:10,064
You did a fine job.

356
00:15:10,066 --> 00:15:12,914
It's just, you were scared
and miserable the whole time.

357
00:15:12,916 --> 00:15:14,214
I think what

358
00:15:14,216 --> 00:15:16,398
we're all trying to say
is, you don't seem

359
00:15:16,400 --> 00:15:19,048
to be remembering how traumatic
the experience was for you.

360
00:15:19,050 --> 00:15:22,398
Like how women often forget
the pain of childbirth.

361
00:15:22,400 --> 00:15:25,131
Like a woman.
Great analogy.

362
00:15:25,932 --> 00:15:28,931
Fine, maybe I was
a little scared.

363
00:15:28,933 --> 00:15:31,514
You peed in your space suit.

364
00:15:31,516 --> 00:15:33,248
You're supposed to do that.

365
00:15:33,250 --> 00:15:35,415
Not during the fitting.

366
00:15:36,548 --> 00:15:39,647
Son, do I need to remind you
what you asked me to do

367
00:15:39,649 --> 00:15:41,314
before you went
up last time?

368
00:15:41,316 --> 00:15:44,480
Hang on. That was
just me joking around.

369
00:15:44,482 --> 00:15:47,547
You wanted me to shoot you
in the foot.

370
00:15:47,549 --> 00:15:50,814
Come on, how is that not a joke?
"You got to get me out of this.

371
00:15:50,816 --> 00:15:52,847
Shoot me in the foot."

372
00:15:54,265 --> 00:15:57,048
Don't forget all the other
astronauts picking on you.

373
00:15:57,050 --> 00:15:58,847
And how you threw up
in zero gravity,

374
00:15:58,849 --> 00:16:01,064
and it floated
back in your mouth.

375
00:16:01,965 --> 00:16:03,348
And you threw up again.

376
00:16:03,350 --> 00:16:05,114
And so on and so on.

377
00:16:07,449 --> 00:16:09,480
That was funny.

378
00:16:09,482 --> 00:16:10,630
Okay, so I wasn't

379
00:16:10,632 --> 00:16:13,564
exactly John Glenn up there,

380
00:16:13,566 --> 00:16:16,264
but I've changed;
I'm a different man now.

381
00:16:16,266 --> 00:16:17,630
Yeah, and I'm
a little

382
00:16:17,632 --> 00:16:21,014
insulted that you guys
don't think I can handle it.

383
00:16:21,016 --> 00:16:23,647
You know you're gonna have to go
through survival training again.

384
00:16:23,649 --> 00:16:24,964
Really?

385
00:16:24,966 --> 00:16:27,348
You've got to get me
out of this!

386
00:16:27,350 --> 00:16:29,847
What do you want me to do?
You're perfectly healthy.

387
00:16:29,849 --> 00:16:31,647
Check my blood pressure again!

388
00:16:31,649 --> 00:16:35,148
I can get it higher;
just give me a second.

389
00:16:36,182 --> 00:16:38,797
Hello?
Hi, Ma. How are you?

390
00:16:39,631 --> 00:16:41,131
How I am is not dead!

391
00:16:41,133 --> 00:16:43,814
But you wouldn't know that,
because you don't love me enough

392
00:16:43,816 --> 00:16:45,148
to pick up the phone!

393
00:16:45,150 --> 00:16:47,630
Go, go, go!

394
00:16:47,632 --> 00:16:51,430
For all you know, I could have
slipped in the tub and drowned!

395
00:16:51,432 --> 00:16:53,964
That's what happened
to your Aunt Ida!

396
00:16:54,815 --> 00:16:56,630
Wow.

397
00:17:05,679 --> 00:17:08,312
Howard, I'm so sorry your
blood pressure was off the charts.

398
00:17:08,314 --> 00:17:10,811
Oh, me, too.
I mean, the doctor was willing

399
00:17:10,813 --> 00:17:12,511
to fudge the results, but...

400
00:17:12,513 --> 00:17:15,444
it just seemed
so darned dishonest.

401
00:17:17,896 --> 00:17:19,945
But the mission wouldn't be
for at least a year.

402
00:17:19,947 --> 00:17:21,978
Isn't that enough time to get
your blood pressure under...

403
00:17:21,980 --> 00:17:24,561
Look, my blood pressure's
too high, okay? Drop it.

404
00:17:25,545 --> 00:17:26,878
You know, my aunt

405
00:17:26,880 --> 00:17:28,695
changed her diet,
and in a few months, she...

406
00:17:28,697 --> 00:17:29,845
Went to space?

407
00:17:29,847 --> 00:17:31,645
I don't think so.
Now, pass the soy sauce.

408
00:17:31,647 --> 00:17:33,511
Hey, not the green one;
the red one.

409
00:17:34,479 --> 00:17:37,544
Sheldon, Amy, will you
please come join us?

410
00:17:37,546 --> 00:17:39,329
Yeah, it's
fun up here.

411
00:17:39,331 --> 00:17:41,745
So why are you
trying to ruin it?

412
00:17:41,747 --> 00:17:43,761
No, thanks.

413
00:17:43,763 --> 00:17:45,778
We're fine.
I mean, if you people

414
00:17:45,780 --> 00:17:49,112
want to eat at the table,
then that's what you should do.

415
00:17:49,114 --> 00:17:50,628
I like eating down here

416
00:17:50,630 --> 00:17:53,095
because this is how
we've always done things.

417
00:17:53,097 --> 00:17:55,478
But if those days are
gone, they're gone.

418
00:17:55,480 --> 00:17:58,695
It just...
makes me sad.

419
00:18:00,113 --> 00:18:01,661
Now I feel bad.

420
00:18:01,663 --> 00:18:04,112
Oh, don't anthropomorphize him;
he's got big eyes,

421
00:18:04,114 --> 00:18:07,811
but his feelings
are not like ours.

422
00:18:08,896 --> 00:18:12,078
No, it just seems silly
for us to sit in two groups.

423
00:18:12,080 --> 00:18:14,112
Well, it's not silly
if you think of that group

424
00:18:14,114 --> 00:18:16,695
as being led
by a big, evil baby.

425
00:18:21,196 --> 00:18:23,278
Look at Amy
down there.

426
00:18:23,280 --> 00:18:25,328
Should we go?

427
00:18:25,330 --> 00:18:27,045
Yeah, let's go.

428
00:18:27,047 --> 00:18:29,278
But... Penny,
this was your idea.

429
00:18:29,280 --> 00:18:31,078
You said that I should
stand up to him.

430
00:18:31,080 --> 00:18:32,361
Forget it, Leonard.

431
00:18:32,363 --> 00:18:34,195
It's over.

432
00:18:35,063 --> 00:18:36,511
Fine.

433
00:18:42,012 --> 00:18:43,478
Rajesh?

434
00:18:43,480 --> 00:18:46,444
Screw that! I sat
on the floor for seven years.

435
00:18:46,446 --> 00:18:48,594
I'm staying right here!

436
00:18:48,596 --> 00:18:51,478
Come on, Raj, it's
not the same without you.

437
00:18:52,680 --> 00:18:55,145
Fine.

438
00:18:55,147 --> 00:18:58,178
But no more making fun
of how I say tings.

439
00:18:58,180 --> 00:19:01,645
You mean "tings"
like "moo-stache"?

440
00:19:07,395 --> 00:19:10,011
Well, isn't this nice.

441
00:19:11,650 --> 00:19:13,207
Sometimes the baby wins.

442
00:19:13,211 --> 00:19:18,206
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man