1
00:00:00,406 --> 00:00:01,705
Okay.

2
00:00:01,707 --> 00:00:04,308
But I realize
they're gluing fur everywhere,

3
00:00:04,310 --> 00:00:05,442
except my cleavage.

4
00:00:05,444 --> 00:00:07,344
So, I asked
the director why

5
00:00:07,346 --> 00:00:09,613
and he says, it's important
to the story that my boobs

6
00:00:09,615 --> 00:00:12,082
be the last things to turn ape.

7
00:00:14,753 --> 00:00:17,755
It's sweet that he thinks
there's a story.

8
00:00:17,757 --> 00:00:20,390
Oh, and there's not even
a bathroom on set.

9
00:00:20,392 --> 00:00:22,659
I have to go to the gas station
across the street.

10
00:00:22,661 --> 00:00:24,595
I mean, I was dressed like
half an ape

11
00:00:24,597 --> 00:00:27,657
and still not even close to the
most disgusting person in there.

12
00:00:28,754 --> 00:00:30,412
Leonard, I could use
your assistance.

13
00:00:30,437 --> 00:00:31,636
Sure. What's up?

14
00:00:31,637 --> 00:00:33,237
Well, now that I've given up
string theory,

15
00:00:33,239 --> 00:00:35,572
I'm struggling to find
my next area of focus.

16
00:00:35,574 --> 00:00:37,708
So, in your
professional opinion,

17
00:00:37,710 --> 00:00:39,576
which of these areas
do you think

18
00:00:39,578 --> 00:00:40,677
is the most promising?

19
00:00:40,679 --> 00:00:42,946
Huh, well, I-I think
there's some

20
00:00:42,948 --> 00:00:45,382
really innovative stuff
going on in dark matter.

21
00:00:45,384 --> 00:00:47,050
That's helpful.

22
00:00:49,888 --> 00:00:51,789
Okay. Of these four areas...

23
00:00:51,791 --> 00:00:52,923
Sheldon!

24
00:00:52,925 --> 00:00:54,625
What did we say about
being a nicer friend?

25
00:00:54,627 --> 00:00:56,026
Thank you.

26
00:00:56,028 --> 00:00:59,129
Leonard, what did we say about
being a gullible weenie?

27
00:01:00,431 --> 00:01:02,266
- It is just so frustrating.
- 'Cause you're

28
00:01:02,268 --> 00:01:03,867
trying too hard.
You need to do something else.

29
00:01:03,869 --> 00:01:05,169
Get your mind off it.

30
00:01:05,171 --> 00:01:08,639
Hey. How about we bring back
Anything Can Happen Thursdays?

31
00:01:08,641 --> 00:01:10,274
Hey, that's good.
Why'd you guys stop doing that?

32
00:01:10,276 --> 00:01:12,509
You made fun of us.
Said it was stupid.

33
00:01:13,478 --> 00:01:14,945
Yeah. Sounds like me.

34
00:01:15,914 --> 00:01:17,181
Come on, Sheldon.
What do you say?

35
00:01:17,183 --> 00:01:20,083
All right.
I officially reinstate

36
00:01:20,085 --> 00:01:21,418
Anything Can Happen Thursday.

37
00:01:21,420 --> 00:01:23,387
Great! What do,
what do you want to do?

38
00:01:24,723 --> 00:01:26,089
I don't know.

39
00:01:26,091 --> 00:01:27,291
What do you want to do?

40
00:01:27,293 --> 00:01:29,393
I don't know.
What do you want to do?

41
00:01:29,395 --> 00:01:31,962
I'm starting to remember
the problem with

42
00:01:31,964 --> 00:01:33,497
Anything Can Happen Thursdays.

43
00:01:58,676 --> 00:02:03,676
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man

44
00:02:03,702 --> 00:02:05,436
Hmm...

45
00:02:05,438 --> 00:02:07,938
what could we do that's fun?

46
00:02:07,940 --> 00:02:09,807
What could we do
that's different?

47
00:02:09,809 --> 00:02:13,177
What could we do that's free?

48
00:02:14,379 --> 00:02:15,680
Got it!

49
00:02:15,682 --> 00:02:17,748
We order a pizza.

50
00:02:17,750 --> 00:02:19,583
Are you kidding?
That's what you always do.

51
00:02:19,585 --> 00:02:20,551
Think harder.

52
00:02:20,553 --> 00:02:22,553
You're right.
You're right.

53
00:02:22,555 --> 00:02:23,688
Got it!

54
00:02:23,690 --> 00:02:26,324
We order calzones,
cut them open,

55
00:02:26,326 --> 00:02:28,392
eat them like pizza.

56
00:02:29,494 --> 00:02:30,928
All right! All right!
I'll shake the brain bush

57
00:02:30,930 --> 00:02:32,663
one more time,
see what falls out.

58
00:02:33,732 --> 00:02:34,899
Got it!

59
00:02:34,901 --> 00:02:37,535
There's a live-action
role-playing group

60
00:02:37,537 --> 00:02:39,270
that meets every Thursday night
in Griffith Park

61
00:02:39,272 --> 00:02:42,506
and reenacts battles from
Lord of the Rings.

62
00:02:42,508 --> 00:02:46,143
Uh, tell me more
about this calzone idea.

63
00:02:47,312 --> 00:02:48,412
You know what?

64
00:02:48,414 --> 00:02:49,747
Why don't we just
ease into this.

65
00:02:49,749 --> 00:02:51,248
Let-Let's go for a walk

66
00:02:51,250 --> 00:02:53,884
and-and-and see if
we find a new restaurant.

67
00:02:53,886 --> 00:02:57,355
Any chance that restaurant
is near Griffith Park?

68
00:02:59,925 --> 00:03:01,092
No.

69
00:03:01,094 --> 00:03:03,627
All right.

70
00:03:03,629 --> 00:03:05,696
Raj and Howard
are at Howard's mom's,

71
00:03:05,698 --> 00:03:07,531
but should we call the girls
and see if they want to come?

72
00:03:07,533 --> 00:03:08,899
No. Bernadette's
working late.

73
00:03:08,901 --> 00:03:10,067
Amy's sick.

74
00:03:10,069 --> 00:03:11,135
Aw. What's wrong with her?

75
00:03:11,137 --> 00:03:12,703
Well, she talks a lot.

76
00:03:12,705 --> 00:03:14,605
She always wants to hold hands.

77
00:03:14,607 --> 00:03:16,307
That's not what I meant.

78
00:03:16,309 --> 00:03:18,175
Well, if you were
referring to her illness

79
00:03:18,177 --> 00:03:20,177
your question should have been,
"What ails her?"

80
00:03:21,747 --> 00:03:22,713
"What ails her?"

81
00:03:22,715 --> 00:03:24,648
Oh. Who knows?

82
00:03:26,351 --> 00:03:27,651
Come on,
anything can happen.

83
00:03:27,653 --> 00:03:29,587
We can push him
down the stairs!

84
00:03:32,057 --> 00:03:34,158
Hey. Thanks for
coming to hang out.

85
00:03:34,160 --> 00:03:36,160
No problem.
How's your mom feeling?

86
00:03:36,162 --> 00:03:39,697
Okay, but she'd feel better
if she took her medicine.

87
00:03:39,699 --> 00:03:41,699
You know, when Cinnamon
won't take her medicine,

88
00:03:41,701 --> 00:03:43,401
I hide it in a piece of cheese.

89
00:03:43,403 --> 00:03:45,236
Good idea.
We can wrap the pill in cheese,

90
00:03:45,238 --> 00:03:46,270
feed it to Cinnamon,

91
00:03:46,272 --> 00:03:47,938
and then my mom
can eat Cinnamon.

92
00:03:51,076 --> 00:03:52,276
What do you feel like doing?

93
00:03:52,278 --> 00:03:54,278
I was thinking
we could watch a DVD.

94
00:03:54,280 --> 00:03:55,479
Well,

95
00:03:55,481 --> 00:03:58,015
my mom doesn't have
a lot to choose from.

96
00:03:58,017 --> 00:04:01,485
Unless you want to watch
the video of her colonoscopy.

97
00:04:03,255 --> 00:04:04,555
Spoiler alert:
20 minutes in,

98
00:04:04,557 --> 00:04:05,923
they find a prune pit.

99
00:04:05,925 --> 00:04:12,229
Actually, how do you feel about
watching House of 1000 Corpses?

100
00:04:12,231 --> 00:04:14,732
A straight-up gore-fest?

101
00:04:14,734 --> 00:04:15,766
You hate this stuff.

102
00:04:15,768 --> 00:04:17,701
I do, but for some reason,
Emily loves it

103
00:04:17,703 --> 00:04:19,603
and wants to watch it
with me tomorrow, so...

104
00:04:19,605 --> 00:04:20,805
I thought if
I start with you first,

105
00:04:20,807 --> 00:04:23,507
then I could act cool
about it with her.

106
00:04:23,509 --> 00:04:25,676
That's actually
not a bad plan.

107
00:04:25,678 --> 00:04:27,278
I can sit through
the colonoscopy now,

108
00:04:27,280 --> 00:04:28,746
but that first time
I was like,

109
00:04:28,748 --> 00:04:31,282
"Oh, My God, a prune pit!"

110
00:04:36,021 --> 00:04:37,455
Uh, so... you'd watch it?

111
00:04:37,457 --> 00:04:38,622
Sure.

112
00:04:38,624 --> 00:04:40,090
You're a good friend.
I owe you one.

113
00:04:40,092 --> 00:04:41,559
Howard!

114
00:04:41,561 --> 00:04:43,461
Help me get out of the tub!

115
00:04:47,666 --> 00:04:49,333
Not that one.

116
00:04:52,871 --> 00:04:55,339
So, we're just randomly
choosing a restaurant

117
00:04:55,341 --> 00:04:56,774
without researching it online?

118
00:04:56,776 --> 00:04:57,608
Yep.

119
00:04:57,610 --> 00:04:59,176
Great.

120
00:04:59,178 --> 00:05:01,679
You know, this is how Anything
Can Happen Thursday turns into

121
00:05:01,681 --> 00:05:03,414
It Won't Stop Coming Up Friday.

122
00:05:05,217 --> 00:05:08,819
Hey, how about
that Asian fusion place?

123
00:05:08,821 --> 00:05:11,422
Fusion and Asians?

124
00:05:11,424 --> 00:05:14,692
I'm trying not to
think about science.

125
00:05:14,694 --> 00:05:16,794
What the hell?

126
00:05:18,363 --> 00:05:19,296
What...?

127
00:05:19,298 --> 00:05:20,631
She's not working late!

128
00:05:21,566 --> 00:05:23,934
And Amy doesn't
look sick.

129
00:05:23,936 --> 00:05:25,402
Why would they
lie to us?

130
00:05:25,404 --> 00:05:26,704
That's a good question.

131
00:05:27,807 --> 00:05:28,672
Amy and Bernadette.

132
00:05:29,575 --> 00:05:30,975
Amy and Bernadette.

133
00:05:30,977 --> 00:05:32,309
Amy and Bernadette.

134
00:05:32,311 --> 00:05:34,945
Why did you lie to us?

135
00:05:37,582 --> 00:05:40,384
Hey. Listen to this:

136
00:05:40,386 --> 00:05:42,987
"Murder... cannibalism

137
00:05:42,989 --> 00:05:44,522
"and satanic rituals

138
00:05:44,524 --> 00:05:45,656
"are just a few

139
00:05:45,658 --> 00:05:48,325
of the thousand plus
horrors that await."

140
00:05:48,327 --> 00:05:50,394
I just helped my mom
out of the tub,

141
00:05:50,396 --> 00:05:53,097
so, I'm one slippery horror
ahead of you.

142
00:05:53,099 --> 00:05:54,298
You're a good son.

143
00:05:54,300 --> 00:05:56,534
I don't know how you do it.

144
00:05:56,536 --> 00:05:58,269
Beach blankets,
my friend.

145
00:05:58,271 --> 00:05:59,970
It's all about
beach blankets.

146
00:05:59,972 --> 00:06:03,407
All right,
let's get this over with.

147
00:06:03,409 --> 00:06:06,844
Ew, it's got
someone's hair on it!

148
00:06:06,846 --> 00:06:08,579
Oh, yeah, you're gonna
do great with this movie.

149
00:06:13,218 --> 00:06:15,920
You're not working late.
Why did you lie to me?

150
00:06:15,922 --> 00:06:18,188
And Amy, you told me
you were sick,

151
00:06:18,190 --> 00:06:21,091
but you look just as pale
and tired as always.

152
00:06:22,661 --> 00:06:24,428
I'm sorry.
I just needed a break

153
00:06:24,430 --> 00:06:27,431
from hearing you obsess about
what to do after string theory.

154
00:06:27,433 --> 00:06:29,600
And we kind of just
wanted one night

155
00:06:29,602 --> 00:06:31,969
where we didn't have to hear
about how miserable you are

156
00:06:31,971 --> 00:06:33,704
making this movie.

157
00:06:33,706 --> 00:06:35,806
But none of that means
we don't love you.

158
00:06:35,808 --> 00:06:38,442
I haven't been complaining
that much about the movie.

159
00:06:38,444 --> 00:06:41,011
Have I?

160
00:06:41,913 --> 00:06:43,280
I also love you.

161
00:06:46,685 --> 00:06:47,985
You know what?

162
00:06:47,987 --> 00:06:49,787
Maybe I need a break from
all of you.

163
00:06:49,789 --> 00:06:52,022
Come on, Sheldon.

164
00:06:52,024 --> 00:06:52,863
Where are we going?

165
00:06:52,888 --> 00:06:54,826
We're gonna have Anything Can
Happen Thursday, you're gonna

166
00:06:54,827 --> 00:06:56,794
tell me all about your science
stuff and I'm gonna complain

167
00:06:56,796 --> 00:06:58,529
about my movie, and we're gonna
support each other because

168
00:06:58,531 --> 00:06:59,697
that's what friends do.

169
00:06:59,699 --> 00:07:00,965
Okay.

170
00:07:00,967 --> 00:07:03,000
'Cause if I
had to pick now,

171
00:07:03,002 --> 00:07:03,930
I'd probably go with
dark matter because...

172
00:07:03,955 --> 00:07:05,955
Shut up.

173
00:07:22,883 --> 00:07:24,017
What's wrong?

174
00:07:24,019 --> 00:07:26,886
I don't understand my food.

175
00:07:28,188 --> 00:07:32,258
Chinese noodles with
Korean barbecue...

176
00:07:32,260 --> 00:07:34,694
in a taco.

177
00:07:36,497 --> 00:07:38,364
It's fusion.

178
00:07:38,366 --> 00:07:40,867
Well, my mother would
lock her car doors

179
00:07:40,869 --> 00:07:44,771
if she had to drive through
this hodgepodge of ethnicity.

180
00:07:48,008 --> 00:07:50,243
Think I've been complaining
too much about the movie?

181
00:07:50,245 --> 00:07:52,045
Not at all.

182
00:07:52,047 --> 00:07:53,479
Thank you.

183
00:07:53,481 --> 00:07:55,648
But to be fair, when you talk,
most of what you say

184
00:07:55,650 --> 00:07:59,419
sounds like, "Wah,
wah, wah, clothes".

185
00:08:02,990 --> 00:08:05,291
Hey, I don't understand
why you're not upset with Amy.

186
00:08:05,293 --> 00:08:07,860
I am. So much so that
I'm gonna bring her here

187
00:08:07,862 --> 00:08:10,096
for dinner on our
next date night.

188
00:08:20,407 --> 00:08:22,408
Okay.

189
00:08:22,410 --> 00:08:25,111
So, in the last 20 minutes,

190
00:08:25,113 --> 00:08:27,914
we've seen a crazy woman
kissing a fetus in a jar.

191
00:08:29,316 --> 00:08:32,852
We've seen a guy
cut in half and sewn to a fish.

192
00:08:34,221 --> 00:08:37,056
And the brutal dismemberment
of a rotisserie chicken

193
00:08:37,058 --> 00:08:39,258
by my mother.

194
00:08:40,494 --> 00:08:44,831
On the bright side, she didn't
even notice the pill.

195
00:08:47,034 --> 00:08:49,702
Why does Emily like this stuff?

196
00:08:49,704 --> 00:08:51,904
Do you think there's something
psychologically wrong with her?

197
00:08:51,906 --> 00:08:54,374
What difference does it make?
What do you mean?

198
00:08:54,376 --> 00:08:56,008
Oh, come on... she could
have a freezer full of

199
00:08:56,010 --> 00:08:58,845
ex-boyfriend's body parts and
you'd still go out with her.

200
00:09:00,013 --> 00:09:01,647
I do like that
the ex-boyfriend's

201
00:09:01,649 --> 00:09:03,082
out of the picture.

202
00:09:07,187 --> 00:09:09,288
I feel so bad about
lying to Sheldon.

203
00:09:09,290 --> 00:09:11,057
How am I gonna
make it up to him?

204
00:09:11,059 --> 00:09:12,725
I'd tell you
what I do with Howard,

205
00:09:12,727 --> 00:09:15,027
but I don't think dressing up
like a Catholic schoolgirl

206
00:09:15,029 --> 00:09:18,097
is gonna work with Sheldon.

207
00:09:20,634 --> 00:09:22,735
He'd probably give you homework.

208
00:09:26,974 --> 00:09:29,175
Did you lie to Howard
about tonight?

209
00:09:29,177 --> 00:09:30,209
Of course.

210
00:09:30,211 --> 00:09:31,844
And you don't feel
guilty about it?

211
00:09:31,846 --> 00:09:33,112
Between Penny's gorilla movie

212
00:09:33,114 --> 00:09:36,616
and Howard's gorilla mother,
I had no choice.

213
00:09:37,684 --> 00:09:39,118
Thankfully Penny and I have

214
00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:40,553
a relationship based on honesty.

215
00:09:42,056 --> 00:09:43,689
What?

216
00:09:43,691 --> 00:09:45,024
I don't lie to her.

217
00:09:45,026 --> 00:09:47,627
Oh, we know
you don't lie to her.

218
00:09:53,834 --> 00:09:55,334
Thank you.

219
00:09:55,336 --> 00:09:56,569
Hey, maybe the answer

220
00:09:56,571 --> 00:09:59,138
to your career question is
in one of these.

221
00:09:59,140 --> 00:10:01,908
Penny,
there's only one cookie

222
00:10:01,910 --> 00:10:04,343
with something in the middle
that solves life's problems,

223
00:10:04,345 --> 00:10:06,412
and that's an Oreo.

224
00:10:07,614 --> 00:10:11,584
Or a Nutter Butter,
if you're in a pinch.

225
00:10:11,586 --> 00:10:14,387
Come on, open it.
I bet it says something great.

226
00:10:14,389 --> 00:10:16,189
This is Asian fusion.

227
00:10:16,191 --> 00:10:20,393
For all you know, there's
a tiny Chihuahua in here.

228
00:10:20,395 --> 00:10:22,361
Fine, I'll go.

229
00:10:22,363 --> 00:10:24,263
Hmm.

230
00:10:24,265 --> 00:10:27,166
"People turn to you
for guidance and wisdom."

231
00:10:27,168 --> 00:10:28,468
Yeah, that's a good one.

232
00:10:28,470 --> 00:10:30,570
No, it's not.

233
00:10:30,572 --> 00:10:32,004
How is that not good?

234
00:10:32,006 --> 00:10:34,240
"Turn to you for wisdom"?

235
00:10:34,242 --> 00:10:36,943
Clearly,
that cookie is mocking you.

236
00:10:37,945 --> 00:10:39,545
You'd never hear
that kind of sass

237
00:10:39,547 --> 00:10:41,547
from a Nutter Butter.

238
00:10:41,549 --> 00:10:43,950
Uh, since you're paying for
dinner, I'll let that slide.

239
00:10:43,952 --> 00:10:45,384
Open yours.

240
00:10:47,020 --> 00:10:49,021
Have you ever paid for a meal?

241
00:10:49,023 --> 00:10:50,590
Not with money. Read.

242
00:10:53,527 --> 00:10:57,663
"Your warm and fun-loving nature
delights those around you."

243
00:10:57,665 --> 00:10:59,699
Oh, try again.

244
00:11:10,577 --> 00:11:12,845
Let me get this straight.

245
00:11:12,847 --> 00:11:15,481
So, he kills this girl's father,

246
00:11:15,483 --> 00:11:17,683
cuts off the guy's face,

247
00:11:17,685 --> 00:11:19,785
and is wearing it as a mask

248
00:11:19,787 --> 00:11:22,655
while he makes out with her.

249
00:11:22,657 --> 00:11:24,557
I'm just gonna say it.

250
00:11:24,559 --> 00:11:27,293
That's not okay.

251
00:11:29,129 --> 00:11:31,030
Why can't I be in a relationship

252
00:11:31,032 --> 00:11:33,933
with a girl
who likes The Sound of Music?

253
00:11:33,935 --> 00:11:37,370
Raj, you are the girl
in the relationship

254
00:11:37,372 --> 00:11:39,572
who likes The Sound of Music.

255
00:11:43,810 --> 00:11:46,245
Hey, Penny. What's up?

256
00:11:47,314 --> 00:11:49,482
No, Bernie's working late.

257
00:11:51,318 --> 00:11:53,719
Really?

258
00:11:53,721 --> 00:11:55,454
Thanks for telling me.

259
00:11:55,456 --> 00:11:58,224
What?

260
00:11:58,226 --> 00:12:01,360
I'm having sex with a Catholic
schoolgirl tonight.

261
00:12:07,268 --> 00:12:09,702
Oh, I think I see
our next stop.

262
00:12:11,372 --> 00:12:13,973
You can't be serious.

263
00:12:13,975 --> 00:12:15,741
If I wanted to waste my time
on nonsense,

264
00:12:15,743 --> 00:12:18,210
I'd follow Leonard
on Instagram.

265
00:12:19,246 --> 00:12:22,448
No, come on... tonight,
we are trying new things.

266
00:12:24,218 --> 00:12:26,686
Oh! That's a lot of incense.

267
00:12:26,688 --> 00:12:29,388
Or someone set a hippie on fire.

268
00:12:33,060 --> 00:12:35,227
Yeah, honey,
I'm still stuck at work.

269
00:12:36,496 --> 00:12:37,863
Really?

270
00:12:37,865 --> 00:12:39,098
Penny said that?

271
00:12:41,201 --> 00:12:44,103
Okay, it's true. I'm sorry.

272
00:12:44,105 --> 00:12:46,372
I'll see you at home.

273
00:12:46,374 --> 00:12:48,741
Yeah, yeah, I'll put it on.

274
00:12:50,077 --> 00:12:52,478
You and I never just
hang out like this.

275
00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:53,646
Why is that?

276
00:12:53,648 --> 00:12:55,448
I know, it's weird, right?
Yeah.

277
00:12:55,450 --> 00:12:56,616
We should do it more often.

278
00:12:56,618 --> 00:12:59,218
Oh, no. I mean, this
is weird right now.

279
00:13:00,588 --> 00:13:02,254
Oh.

280
00:13:02,256 --> 00:13:03,756
Ah, it's Penny.

281
00:13:03,758 --> 00:13:05,091
Is she still mad?

282
00:13:05,093 --> 00:13:06,225
Oh, doesn't seem like it.

283
00:13:06,227 --> 00:13:08,928
She got Sheldon to go
to a psychic with her.

284
00:13:08,930 --> 00:13:10,229
A psychic?

285
00:13:10,231 --> 00:13:12,632
He considers them
not just mumbo jumbo,

286
00:13:12,634 --> 00:13:15,701
but extra-jumbo
mumbo jumbo.

287
00:13:15,703 --> 00:13:18,137
Well, Penny can be
pretty persuasive.

288
00:13:18,139 --> 00:13:21,173
She's gotten me to do a lot of
things I wouldn't normally do.

289
00:13:21,175 --> 00:13:23,109
Because she has
sex with you.

290
00:13:23,111 --> 00:13:26,145
Yeah, she does.

291
00:13:26,147 --> 00:13:28,514
Can I confess something?

292
00:13:28,516 --> 00:13:30,416
Once in a while,
I get a little jealous

293
00:13:30,418 --> 00:13:31,851
of how close Penny
and Sheldon are.

294
00:13:31,853 --> 00:13:32,917
Really?

295
00:13:32,942 --> 00:13:34,521
I mean, not in
a romantic way.

296
00:13:34,522 --> 00:13:37,990
It's just, she really has some
sort of connection with him.

297
00:13:37,992 --> 00:13:40,726
Well... Well, they've known
each other a long time,

298
00:13:40,728 --> 00:13:43,095
and Penny grew up around horses,

299
00:13:43,097 --> 00:13:46,899
so she knows how to approach him
without making him skittish.

300
00:13:46,901 --> 00:13:49,135
Don't get me wrong.
I'm glad they're friends.

301
00:13:49,137 --> 00:13:51,604
I just wish he'd be that
comfortable around me already.

302
00:13:51,606 --> 00:13:55,975
Well, it took him a long time to
get comfortable around me, too.

303
00:13:55,977 --> 00:13:58,277
Really? What did you do?

304
00:13:58,279 --> 00:14:01,747
Something terrible in a former life?
I don't know.

305
00:14:01,749 --> 00:14:04,283
I gotta go.

306
00:14:04,285 --> 00:14:05,885
Penny ratted me out.

307
00:14:05,887 --> 00:14:07,653
FYI, she's getting you
a watch for your birthday

308
00:14:07,655 --> 00:14:09,455
with money she took
out of your wallet.

309
00:14:15,529 --> 00:14:19,198
I don't mean to be
rude or discourteous,

310
00:14:19,200 --> 00:14:21,033
but before we begin,
I'd just like to say

311
00:14:21,035 --> 00:14:23,602
there is absolutely
no scientific evidence

312
00:14:23,604 --> 00:14:25,938
to support clairvoyance
of any kind.

313
00:14:25,940 --> 00:14:27,840
Which means...

314
00:14:27,842 --> 00:14:32,111
and again, no insult intended...
but you're a fraud...

315
00:14:32,946 --> 00:14:35,081
your profession
is a swindle,

316
00:14:35,083 --> 00:14:36,615
and, uh, your livelihood
is dependent

317
00:14:36,617 --> 00:14:39,485
on the gullibility
of stupid people.

318
00:14:40,821 --> 00:14:43,889
Again, no offense.

319
00:14:43,891 --> 00:14:45,658
All right, Sheldon,
just ask your question.

320
00:14:48,863 --> 00:14:51,497
Okay, I just did.
What was it?

321
00:14:52,432 --> 00:14:53,766
Oh, for God's sake.

322
00:14:53,768 --> 00:14:55,067
Look, he's a physicist
who's trying to figure out

323
00:14:55,069 --> 00:14:56,368
what his next field
of study should be.

324
00:14:56,370 --> 00:14:57,570
For your information,

325
00:14:57,572 --> 00:15:00,539
I was asking her
about the next Star Trek movie.

326
00:15:00,541 --> 00:15:04,343
Okay, I can answer that one:
I'll be bored.

327
00:15:04,345 --> 00:15:06,612
All right, why don't we begin?

328
00:15:14,387 --> 00:15:16,322
Your spirit guides
are telling me

329
00:15:16,324 --> 00:15:18,424
that there's a woman
in your life

330
00:15:18,426 --> 00:15:20,426
you're having problems with.

331
00:15:20,428 --> 00:15:22,595
That's an easy guess.

332
00:15:22,597 --> 00:15:24,296
I'm clearly an annoying person

333
00:15:24,298 --> 00:15:26,799
and have problems
with both genders.

334
00:15:26,801 --> 00:15:30,002
Yes, you clearly are.

335
00:15:31,304 --> 00:15:32,605
But I'm seeing

336
00:15:32,607 --> 00:15:34,206
a specific woman

337
00:15:34,208 --> 00:15:36,842
that you're in a romantic
relationship with.

338
00:15:36,844 --> 00:15:39,178
Oh, oh, here we go.

339
00:15:40,247 --> 00:15:41,313
Does she have dark hair?

340
00:15:41,315 --> 00:15:45,317
Yes! Yes! Your spirit guides
are on fire!

341
00:15:45,319 --> 00:15:47,520
The majority
of people have dark hair.

342
00:15:47,522 --> 00:15:50,022
Even you, at one time.

343
00:15:51,191 --> 00:15:53,058
Does she work
in a similar field to you?

344
00:15:53,060 --> 00:15:54,660
Ha! The opposite.

345
00:15:54,662 --> 00:15:57,830
She's a neurobiologist, and
I'm a theoretical physicist.

346
00:15:57,832 --> 00:16:00,065
My spirit guides
can go suck an egg.

347
00:16:01,301 --> 00:16:02,601
They're telling me

348
00:16:02,603 --> 00:16:05,037
that you have difficulty
being close with her.

349
00:16:05,039 --> 00:16:07,573
Oh, he does. He so does.
What should he do?

350
00:16:11,611 --> 00:16:14,113
He should give himself
to this relationship.

351
00:16:14,115 --> 00:16:16,182
Once he does, all his

352
00:16:16,184 --> 00:16:18,417
other pursuits will come
into focus.

353
00:16:18,419 --> 00:16:19,718
Sheldon, do you hear that?

354
00:16:19,720 --> 00:16:22,054
I mean, Amy is the key
to your happiness.

355
00:16:22,056 --> 00:16:23,255
Exactly.

356
00:16:23,257 --> 00:16:25,090
Personally and professionally.

357
00:16:25,092 --> 00:16:29,295
Everything will fall into place
once you commit to her.

358
00:16:34,434 --> 00:16:36,535
You know what this is?

359
00:16:36,537 --> 00:16:39,538
Yeah, and I reserve this word
for those rare instances

360
00:16:39,540 --> 00:16:41,240
when it's truly deserved.

361
00:16:41,242 --> 00:16:43,542
This is malarkey!

362
00:16:48,114 --> 00:16:49,782
Wow, you really struck a nerve.

363
00:16:49,784 --> 00:16:52,718
I've never heard him use
the "M" word before.

364
00:17:01,502 --> 00:17:03,003
Here we go:

365
00:17:03,005 --> 00:17:05,005
House of a 1,000 Corpses.

366
00:17:05,007 --> 00:17:06,807
Now, just so you know,

367
00:17:06,809 --> 00:17:09,543
I was a nanny for three years,
so if you get scared,

368
00:17:09,545 --> 00:17:11,778
I can totally change
your diaper.

369
00:17:11,780 --> 00:17:15,348
Actually, I have to
tell you something.

370
00:17:15,350 --> 00:17:18,618
These kind of movies
really aren't my thing,

371
00:17:18,620 --> 00:17:20,554
so, last night,
I watched it

372
00:17:20,576 --> 00:17:22,015
just to see what I was
getting myself into.

373
00:17:22,040 --> 00:17:23,624
Okay.

374
00:17:23,625 --> 00:17:25,725
And I have to be honest...
I thought it was

375
00:17:25,727 --> 00:17:28,628
disturbing and weird,
and it made me wonder

376
00:17:28,630 --> 00:17:30,831
what it says about
someone who enjoys it.

377
00:17:30,833 --> 00:17:32,999
I wonder that, too.

378
00:17:33,001 --> 00:17:35,001
Then, why do you
watch these things?

379
00:17:35,003 --> 00:17:37,737
Can I tell you something
without you judging me?

380
00:17:37,739 --> 00:17:39,706
Sure.

381
00:17:39,708 --> 00:17:41,708
They kind of turn me on.

382
00:17:41,710 --> 00:17:44,344
And play.

383
00:17:49,684 --> 00:17:51,351
Attention...

384
00:17:56,457 --> 00:17:58,425
Hello.

385
00:17:58,427 --> 00:18:00,093
I didn't expect you
this evening.

386
00:18:00,095 --> 00:18:02,062
Well, I was just feeling so bad

387
00:18:02,064 --> 00:18:03,763
about lying to you
the other night,

388
00:18:03,765 --> 00:18:06,466
I wanted to make it up to you.

389
00:18:06,468 --> 00:18:08,802
And how do you propose
to do that?

390
00:18:20,231 --> 00:18:22,567
Unless you have Gravity
on Blu-ray under that skirt,

391
00:18:22,568 --> 00:18:24,100
I don't know
where you're going with this.

392
00:18:24,102 --> 00:18:29,102
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man