1
00:00:00,834 --> 00:00:02,373
for our lecture at Berkeley.

2
00:00:02,375 --> 00:00:03,542
Oh, I like to laugh.

3
00:00:03,544 --> 00:00:05,046
But say it anyway.

4
00:00:06,048 --> 00:00:07,983
Okay, um...

5
00:00:07,985 --> 00:00:10,647
What do you say
to a graduate

6
00:00:10,649 --> 00:00:12,919
of the UC Berkeley
physics department?

7
00:00:12,921 --> 00:00:15,518
I'll have fries with that.

8
00:00:16,489 --> 00:00:18,494
Because his education
hasn't prepared him

9
00:00:18,496 --> 00:00:20,358
for a career in the sciences.

10
00:00:22,526 --> 00:00:24,195
You know, when they chase
you out of there,

11
00:00:24,197 --> 00:00:25,890
you only have to run
faster than Sheldon.

12
00:00:26,629 --> 00:00:27,964
Are you all set
for your trip?

13
00:00:27,966 --> 00:00:29,299
Yeah, I think so.

14
00:00:29,301 --> 00:00:32,530
I just restocked the old PRK.

15
00:00:32,532 --> 00:00:33,570
"PRK"?

16
00:00:33,572 --> 00:00:35,065
Public restroom kit.

17
00:00:36,074 --> 00:00:38,804
Everything a boy needs
for making pee pee

18
00:00:38,806 --> 00:00:41,066
in new and strange places.

19
00:00:41,068 --> 00:00:43,503
I don't see what's crazy
about bringing a backpack

20
00:00:43,505 --> 00:00:45,836
with your own toilet paper
and Purell.

21
00:00:45,838 --> 00:00:47,933
Keep going.

22
00:00:47,935 --> 00:00:50,709
And rubber gloves,
uh, air freshener.

23
00:00:50,711 --> 00:00:53,309
Um, noise-cancelling
headphones.

24
00:00:53,311 --> 00:00:54,876
Oh, danger whistle.

25
00:00:54,878 --> 00:00:56,140
Um...

26
00:00:56,142 --> 00:00:57,444
pepper spray.

27
00:00:57,446 --> 00:01:00,411
Ooh, a multi-language
"occupied" sign.

28
00:01:00,413 --> 00:01:01,818
Uh, let's see.

29
00:01:01,820 --> 00:01:05,185
We have seat protectors,
uh, booties for my shoes,

30
00:01:05,187 --> 00:01:07,248
a clothespin for my nose.

31
00:01:07,250 --> 00:01:10,549
Oh, and a mirror on a stick,

32
00:01:10,551 --> 00:01:12,955
so I can make sure the person
in the stall next to me

33
00:01:12,957 --> 00:01:14,786
isn't some kind of weirdo.

34
00:01:17,489 --> 00:01:20,486
You still worried some Berkeley
girl is gonna steal him away?

35
00:01:20,488 --> 00:01:24,094
Yes, who do you think gave him
the danger whistle?

36
00:01:49,250 --> 00:01:55,743
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man

37
00:01:55,990 --> 00:01:58,595
Would you like to play
a physics car game I invented

38
00:01:58,597 --> 00:02:00,562
called "I Can't Spy"?

39
00:02:01,627 --> 00:02:03,894
It's all the nail-biting
tension of "I Spy"

40
00:02:03,896 --> 00:02:06,891
but the added fun of subatomic
particles and waves

41
00:02:06,893 --> 00:02:09,024
outside the visible
spectrum.

42
00:02:09,026 --> 00:02:10,590
If it's half as much fun as

43
00:02:10,592 --> 00:02:12,724
"One Times Ten to the Fourth
Bottles of Beer on the Wall,"

44
00:02:12,726 --> 00:02:14,395
I'm in.

45
00:02:14,397 --> 00:02:16,027
I'll begin.

46
00:02:16,029 --> 00:02:20,528
Uh, I can't spy
with my little eye...

47
00:02:21,665 --> 00:02:24,364
something passing
right through us.

48
00:02:24,366 --> 00:02:26,026
That soy Frappuccino I had.

49
00:02:27,163 --> 00:02:29,030
Will you please
play the game?

50
00:02:29,032 --> 00:02:31,627
I can't spy
with my little eye

51
00:02:31,629 --> 00:02:33,657
something passing
right through us.

52
00:02:33,659 --> 00:02:35,727
I don't know, um...

53
00:02:35,729 --> 00:02:38,396
If 65 billion
solar neutrinos pass

54
00:02:38,398 --> 00:02:40,458
through a square centimeter
every second,

55
00:02:40,460 --> 00:02:42,497
given the surface
area of this car is

56
00:02:42,499 --> 00:02:44,392
about 60,000
square centimeters,

57
00:02:44,394 --> 00:02:49,134
that means 3.9 times ten
to the 15th solar neutrinos?

58
00:02:51,198 --> 00:02:53,696
I don't want
to play anymore.

59
00:02:54,697 --> 00:02:56,261
We haven't been on a road trip
in a while.

60
00:02:56,263 --> 00:02:57,459
This is fun.

61
00:02:57,461 --> 00:02:58,929
We get it... you won the game.

62
00:02:58,931 --> 00:03:00,728
Stop bragging.

63
00:03:00,730 --> 00:03:02,896
No, listen, we wrote
a paper together.

64
00:03:02,898 --> 00:03:04,630
Now we get to go to a university
and talk about it?

65
00:03:04,632 --> 00:03:06,133
That's pretty cool.

66
00:03:06,998 --> 00:03:08,833
I suppose it is.

67
00:03:08,835 --> 00:03:13,364
In fact, if you'd like to
celebrate with a little music,

68
00:03:13,366 --> 00:03:14,993
I'd be okay with that.

69
00:03:14,995 --> 00:03:17,826
What...?

70
00:03:19,089 --> 00:03:21,290
This road trip just got crazy.

71
00:03:22,249 --> 00:03:24,513
Play that funky music,
white boy.

72
00:03:26,414 --> 00:03:28,441
I'm surprised you know
that reference.

73
00:03:28,443 --> 00:03:31,340
What reference?

74
00:03:34,377 --> 00:03:37,334
So, I put stickers
on everything we're gonna sell.

75
00:03:37,336 --> 00:03:39,195
We just need help taking it
all out to the driveway.

76
00:03:39,197 --> 00:03:40,560
Can I be in charge
of pricing?

77
00:03:40,562 --> 00:03:43,062
I've been going to garage
sales my whole life.

78
00:03:43,064 --> 00:03:45,333
Can you believe I got these
pantyhose for a nickel?

79
00:03:46,935 --> 00:03:50,399
All right, Amy's in charge
of pricing and being 75.

80
00:03:51,967 --> 00:03:53,626
Hey, Penny, can you
give me a hand with this?

81
00:03:53,628 --> 00:03:54,730
Sure.

82
00:03:54,732 --> 00:03:56,328
Aw, we had one of
these growing up.

83
00:03:56,330 --> 00:03:57,798
I used to play
all the time.

84
00:03:57,800 --> 00:03:59,563
Oh, yeah?
I love Ping-Pong.

85
00:03:59,565 --> 00:04:01,791
Oh, I meant beer pong.

86
00:04:02,993 --> 00:04:04,525
I had a table, too,

87
00:04:04,527 --> 00:04:07,163
but I didn't have any friends,
so all I did was serve.

88
00:04:08,396 --> 00:04:10,834
You know, you can leave one
side up and play against it.

89
00:04:10,836 --> 00:04:13,738
And if I had a friend,
they might have told me that.

90
00:04:16,305 --> 00:04:17,998
Excuse me.

91
00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:20,163
Why is there a sticker on this?

92
00:04:20,165 --> 00:04:21,969
It's my TARDIS
from Doctor Who.

93
00:04:21,971 --> 00:04:24,000
I was planning on
moving it in the house.

94
00:04:24,002 --> 00:04:26,270
I think you just answered
your own question.

95
00:04:27,567 --> 00:04:30,235
Come on, one day,
this may double in value

96
00:04:30,237 --> 00:04:32,905
and be worth half
what I paid for it.

97
00:04:32,907 --> 00:04:34,535
Sweetie, we have a lot to do.

98
00:04:34,537 --> 00:04:36,333
We don't need
to decide this right now.

99
00:04:36,335 --> 00:04:39,304
Well, I guess as long as
you're keeping an open mind.

100
00:04:39,306 --> 00:04:41,168
Of course.

101
00:04:57,248 --> 00:04:59,110
So... they're requesting

102
00:04:59,112 --> 00:05:02,411
that the white boy play
the funky music, yes?

103
00:05:02,413 --> 00:05:04,378
Yes.

104
00:05:04,380 --> 00:05:09,511
And this music we're listening
to right now is funky as well?

105
00:05:10,648 --> 00:05:12,683
Sure.

106
00:05:12,685 --> 00:05:14,344
Let me ask you this.

107
00:05:14,346 --> 00:05:15,814
Do you think

108
00:05:15,816 --> 00:05:20,442
this song is the music
the white boy ultimately plays?

109
00:05:22,283 --> 00:05:24,215
It could be.

110
00:05:24,217 --> 00:05:27,778
So it's like the musical
equivalent of Russell's Paradox,

111
00:05:27,780 --> 00:05:30,446
the question of whether
the set of all sets

112
00:05:30,448 --> 00:05:33,672
that don't contain themselves
as members contains itself?

113
00:05:33,674 --> 00:05:35,638
Exactly.
Well...

114
00:05:35,640 --> 00:05:36,940
then I hate it.

115
00:05:36,942 --> 00:05:38,242
Music should just be fun.

116
00:05:41,009 --> 00:05:42,667
Making great time.

117
00:05:42,669 --> 00:05:44,801
Gonna be there pretty early.

118
00:05:44,803 --> 00:05:46,439
Will our hotel room
be ready?

119
00:05:46,441 --> 00:05:47,804
I doubt it.

120
00:05:47,806 --> 00:05:50,400
Aren't you worried
that sitting in the lobby

121
00:05:50,402 --> 00:05:52,933
for a long period of time
might attract the attention

122
00:05:52,935 --> 00:05:55,664
of the hotel detective?

123
00:05:55,666 --> 00:05:57,293
If we do,

124
00:05:57,295 --> 00:06:00,960
we'll just tell him
to "hit the bricks, see?"

125
00:06:02,097 --> 00:06:05,334
Seems a little confrontational,
but all right.

126
00:06:06,567 --> 00:06:09,195
You know,
we won't be very far

127
00:06:09,197 --> 00:06:10,603
from Skywalker Ranch.

128
00:06:10,605 --> 00:06:12,465
Oh, that's true.

129
00:06:12,467 --> 00:06:14,367
It's not like
we can get in there.

130
00:06:14,369 --> 00:06:16,397
Why not?

131
00:06:16,399 --> 00:06:18,404
I-I don't think George Lucas
put his headquarters

132
00:06:18,406 --> 00:06:21,467
in the middle of nowhere because
he wanted people dropping in.

133
00:06:21,469 --> 00:06:25,734
Yoda's swamp was
in the middle of nowhere.

134
00:06:25,736 --> 00:06:27,900
Tatooine was in the middle
of nowhere.

135
00:06:27,902 --> 00:06:30,106
Hoth was in the middle
of nowhere.

136
00:06:31,634 --> 00:06:33,072
That's code, Leonard.

137
00:06:33,074 --> 00:06:35,270
He wants us
to drop in.

138
00:06:37,807 --> 00:06:39,035
We do have time.

139
00:06:39,037 --> 00:06:41,935
I mean, we could drive by
and just look at it.

140
00:06:41,937 --> 00:06:44,067
Yes! Oh...

141
00:06:44,069 --> 00:06:45,705
I'm so excited.

142
00:06:45,707 --> 00:06:48,102
And I just can't hide it.

143
00:06:48,104 --> 00:06:51,973
"I'm about to lose control,
and I think I like it."

144
00:06:53,910 --> 00:06:55,907
What are you
talking about?

145
00:07:01,608 --> 00:07:03,845
So when do you guys think
you're gonna move in?

146
00:07:03,847 --> 00:07:06,779
We're still figuring how much
remodeling we want to do.

147
00:07:06,781 --> 00:07:08,810
It's tricky finding
the right balance

148
00:07:08,812 --> 00:07:09,913
between "tasteful modern"

149
00:07:09,915 --> 00:07:12,773
and "Jewish mother
tchotchke crapfest."

150
00:07:13,742 --> 00:07:16,145
Have you made a decision
about the TARDIS?

151
00:07:16,147 --> 00:07:19,341
I think I can sell it if we call
it, "Big British Porta-Potty."

152
00:07:21,509 --> 00:07:24,375
We're not selling
it... it's mine.

153
00:07:24,377 --> 00:07:26,006
You can't just decide.

154
00:07:26,008 --> 00:07:27,843
How about I arm-wrestle you?

155
00:07:27,845 --> 00:07:29,209
That's not fair.

156
00:07:29,211 --> 00:07:33,109
It's like me challenging you
to a sexy pants contest.

157
00:07:34,509 --> 00:07:35,803
You could play
Ping-Pong for it.

158
00:07:35,805 --> 00:07:37,410
I would do that.

159
00:07:37,412 --> 00:07:38,338
How is that fair?

160
00:07:38,340 --> 00:07:39,642
You grew up
with a table.

161
00:07:39,644 --> 00:07:42,111
Yes, but I mostly used it
as a battlefield

162
00:07:42,113 --> 00:07:44,907
in an ongoing war between the
Transformers and the ThunderCats

163
00:07:44,909 --> 00:07:47,504
for control of a bra
I had found in the woods.

164
00:07:49,977 --> 00:07:51,646
Bernadette, for every episode
of Doctor Who

165
00:07:51,648 --> 00:07:52,973
Leonard has made me sit through,

166
00:07:52,975 --> 00:07:54,243
I will play on your behalf

167
00:07:54,245 --> 00:07:56,273
and send that TARDIS
back to Gallifrey,

168
00:07:56,275 --> 00:07:58,239
where I hate
that I know it belongs.

169
00:07:58,241 --> 00:08:00,843
Yes, Penny
plays for me.

170
00:08:00,845 --> 00:08:03,838
That's not fair...
she has upper body muscles.

171
00:08:05,406 --> 00:08:08,009
Dude, three-time
Sanskriti School

172
00:08:08,011 --> 00:08:10,941
for Well-Born Boys
badminton champion.

173
00:08:11,837 --> 00:08:13,736
That's right... okay,
Raj can play for me.

174
00:08:13,738 --> 00:08:15,470
Ooh, you just chose champions.

175
00:08:15,472 --> 00:08:17,435
It's like we're reenacting
the ancient German practice

176
00:08:17,437 --> 00:08:19,337
- of trial by combat.
- Yeah, it's also like

177
00:08:19,339 --> 00:08:21,704
when the Mountain fought the
Red Viper in Game of Thrones.

178
00:08:21,706 --> 00:08:23,470
Leonard makes you
watch that, too?

179
00:08:23,472 --> 00:08:25,005
No, no, I like that show.

180
00:08:25,007 --> 00:08:26,835
It's got dragons
and people doing it.

181
00:08:27,771 --> 00:08:29,134
So it's settled.

182
00:08:29,136 --> 00:08:31,701
The fate of Doctor Who's TARDIS
will be decided

183
00:08:31,703 --> 00:08:34,233
by a Game of Thrones inspired
death-match on the battlefield

184
00:08:34,235 --> 00:08:37,334
of ThunderCats
versus Transformers.

185
00:08:37,336 --> 00:08:40,635
If you still have that bra,
I'll give you a nickel for it.

186
00:08:46,335 --> 00:08:49,694
There it is.

187
00:08:49,696 --> 00:08:52,666
It's just a gate.

188
00:08:52,668 --> 00:08:55,661
On a road.

189
00:08:55,663 --> 00:08:57,827
Wasn't even that
hard to find.

190
00:09:00,698 --> 00:09:01,990
This is so amazing!

191
00:09:01,992 --> 00:09:03,861
I know!

192
00:09:04,894 --> 00:09:06,426
You want to
get a picture?

193
00:09:06,428 --> 00:09:07,960
I want more than a picture.

194
00:09:07,962 --> 00:09:09,222
I want to go in.

195
00:09:09,224 --> 00:09:10,925
Well, so do I, but
they'll never let us.

196
00:09:10,927 --> 00:09:14,393
Is that the attitude
that helped you get Penny?

197
00:09:14,395 --> 00:09:16,262
No, but I don't have three years

198
00:09:16,264 --> 00:09:18,595
to make that gate
feel sorry for me.

199
00:09:20,460 --> 00:09:22,455
Uh, there's
a speaker box.

200
00:09:22,457 --> 00:09:25,955
Drive up, push the button,
and let's see what happens.

201
00:09:26,829 --> 00:09:28,424
Okay, yeah.

202
00:09:28,426 --> 00:09:31,052
What do we
have to lose?

203
00:09:38,857 --> 00:09:40,459
I'm a little nervous.

204
00:09:40,461 --> 00:09:43,089
Well, get over it.

205
00:09:43,091 --> 00:09:45,760
Confidence is key
in these situations.

206
00:09:45,762 --> 00:09:47,623
Right.

207
00:09:48,761 --> 00:09:51,294
You pushed it...
are you out of your mind?

208
00:09:52,632 --> 00:09:53,797
May I help you?

209
00:09:53,799 --> 00:09:54,860
Um...

210
00:09:54,862 --> 00:09:57,066
Uh, uh... we don't
have an appointment,

211
00:09:57,068 --> 00:09:58,298
and-and we don't
belong here,

212
00:09:58,300 --> 00:10:00,600
but we-we're, like,
crazy-big fans.

213
00:10:00,602 --> 00:10:02,165
I mean...

214
00:10:02,167 --> 00:10:04,298
"crazy for Star
Wars" crazy,

215
00:10:04,300 --> 00:10:07,262
not crazy like we have a
backpack full of duct tape,

216
00:10:07,264 --> 00:10:08,660
although we do
have a backpack

217
00:10:08,662 --> 00:10:10,857
that you really don't
want to look in.

218
00:10:13,729 --> 00:10:14,998
You're blowing it.

219
00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:16,661
We want to meet
George Lucas

220
00:10:16,663 --> 00:10:19,192
and become his friends
and play with him!

221
00:10:21,598 --> 00:10:22,891
Hello?

222
00:10:22,893 --> 00:10:24,794
This speaker's not working,
just pull up.

223
00:10:29,527 --> 00:10:31,427
And that's how it's done.

224
00:10:43,372 --> 00:10:47,467
All right, we've defeated
the first challenge.

225
00:10:48,836 --> 00:10:51,535
Now we must steel ourselves
to face the monster

226
00:10:51,537 --> 00:10:53,797
who defends the gate.

227
00:10:53,799 --> 00:10:56,362
We're trying to get past
a security guard,

228
00:10:56,364 --> 00:10:58,231
not rescue Zelda.

229
00:10:59,734 --> 00:11:02,432
I think what really needs to be
rescued is your sense of whimsy,

230
00:11:02,434 --> 00:11:04,430
but one quest at a time.

231
00:11:06,366 --> 00:11:08,097
So what's the plan?

232
00:11:08,099 --> 00:11:10,391
Uh, I'm just gonna be honest
with the guy.

233
00:11:10,393 --> 00:11:12,764
Honesty will never
get us in.

234
00:11:12,766 --> 00:11:14,395
Well, what's
your plan?

235
00:11:14,397 --> 00:11:17,762
All right, my plan is
predicated on the assumption

236
00:11:17,764 --> 00:11:19,728
that they have
a nurse's office

237
00:11:19,730 --> 00:11:22,597
and your willingness
to be lightly stabbed.

238
00:11:30,535 --> 00:11:32,028
Who are you here to see?

239
00:11:32,030 --> 00:11:33,596
Uh, I'm just gonna
tell you the truth.

240
00:11:33,598 --> 00:11:36,129
Oh, you are killing me.

241
00:11:36,131 --> 00:11:38,167
We don't have
an appointment.

242
00:11:38,169 --> 00:11:40,165
We-we're just fans
of Mr. Lucas's work,

243
00:11:40,167 --> 00:11:41,429
and we thought
we'd take a shot

244
00:11:41,431 --> 00:11:43,466
and see if we could get in
and look around.

245
00:11:43,468 --> 00:11:44,896
Sorry, guys, we get this a lot.

246
00:11:44,898 --> 00:11:45,998
Can't let you in.

247
00:11:46,000 --> 00:11:49,894
What if I told you
that I was the voice of Yoda?

248
00:11:50,999 --> 00:11:55,095
A recording
session I must attend.

249
00:11:55,896 --> 00:11:57,786
I'm sorry, don't
listen to him.

250
00:11:57,788 --> 00:11:59,488
We're actually
physicists.

251
00:11:59,490 --> 00:12:01,388
We're giving a lecture
at Berkeley later today.

252
00:12:01,390 --> 00:12:03,386
We just... we had
some time to kill.

253
00:12:03,388 --> 00:12:05,655
Hey, listen, you
seem like decent guys.

254
00:12:05,657 --> 00:12:06,948
I can't let you in,

255
00:12:06,950 --> 00:12:09,481
but I got some hats and T-shirts
I can give you.

256
00:12:09,483 --> 00:12:11,350
Thank you so much.

257
00:12:11,352 --> 00:12:12,916
See?

258
00:12:12,918 --> 00:12:14,220
Maybe honesty is the best...

259
00:12:14,222 --> 00:12:15,219
What are you doing?

260
00:12:15,221 --> 00:12:16,880
Shedding the yoke
of my oppressors,

261
00:12:16,882 --> 00:12:19,086
you blind,
sad little man.

262
00:12:19,918 --> 00:12:21,252
Don't move!

263
00:12:21,254 --> 00:12:23,282
Code A-A-23, A-A-23.

264
00:12:23,284 --> 00:12:24,649
Copy.

265
00:12:24,651 --> 00:12:26,781
I can see the ranch, Leonard!

266
00:12:26,783 --> 00:12:29,346
Oh, it's rustic,
it's lovely.

267
00:12:29,348 --> 00:12:32,182
I'd take a picture,
but people are chasing me.

268
00:12:33,719 --> 00:12:35,042
I'm gonna make it...!

269
00:12:35,044 --> 00:12:36,344
I'm gonna make it!

270
00:12:36,346 --> 00:12:38,676
They have Tasers,
but they wouldn't dare use...

271
00:12:42,712 --> 00:12:45,171
Come on, Raj.

272
00:12:45,173 --> 00:12:48,871
You are the King Kong
of Ping-Pong.

273
00:12:48,873 --> 00:12:52,642
You are the menace
of table tennis.

274
00:12:52,644 --> 00:12:55,740
Put her away,
'cause I don't have a third one.

275
00:12:55,742 --> 00:12:57,506
Yes!
Yes!

276
00:12:58,475 --> 00:13:00,966
Rajesh eight, Penny four.

277
00:13:00,968 --> 00:13:02,934
Sorry,
he's really good.

278
00:13:02,936 --> 00:13:05,065
Hey, Raj.

279
00:13:05,067 --> 00:13:06,233
if Howard can't
keep the TARDIS:

280
00:13:06,235 --> 00:13:07,933
how great would it
look at your place?

281
00:13:07,935 --> 00:13:08,963
What?

282
00:13:08,965 --> 00:13:10,401
Yeah, what?

283
00:13:10,403 --> 00:13:12,826
I don't know much
about Doctor Who,

284
00:13:12,828 --> 00:13:14,724
but if, um, you were to put this

285
00:13:14,726 --> 00:13:18,753
right outside your front door
and open up the back,

286
00:13:18,755 --> 00:13:21,779
it would be like
your entire apartment was

287
00:13:21,781 --> 00:13:23,545
the inside of the TARDIS:

288
00:13:23,547 --> 00:13:25,279
which is pretty cool

289
00:13:25,281 --> 00:13:27,609
'cause on the show,
the inside of the TARDIS

290
00:13:27,611 --> 00:13:30,540
is bigger than the outside.

291
00:13:30,542 --> 00:13:34,460
But then again, I don't know
much about Doctor Who.

292
00:13:35,628 --> 00:13:37,295
Don't listen to her.

293
00:13:37,297 --> 00:13:40,027
You and I go way back...
we're like brothers.

294
00:13:40,859 --> 00:13:42,528
We are. We are.

295
00:13:43,823 --> 00:13:45,755
Oh, no!

296
00:13:45,757 --> 00:13:47,153
What a terrible serve!

297
00:13:49,227 --> 00:13:50,691
Sorry, brother.

298
00:13:50,693 --> 00:13:52,055
Eight-five.
This is ridiculous.

299
00:13:52,057 --> 00:13:53,316
I want a new champion.

300
00:13:53,318 --> 00:13:56,078
Amy, were you serious
about being able to serve?

301
00:13:56,080 --> 00:13:58,410
Uh, it-it's been
a long time.

302
00:13:58,412 --> 00:14:00,375
I don't know.

303
00:14:00,377 --> 00:14:02,310
I'm probably
pretty rusty.

304
00:14:05,811 --> 00:14:07,112
Wow.

305
00:14:07,114 --> 00:14:08,143
She's my champion!

306
00:14:08,145 --> 00:14:10,180
Well, if you can switch
champions, so can I.

307
00:14:10,182 --> 00:14:11,580
I want Raj.
Hey.

308
00:14:11,582 --> 00:14:13,442
Oh, come on, like
you even care.

309
00:14:13,444 --> 00:14:14,777
I care!

310
00:14:14,779 --> 00:14:16,616
Oh, wait, no, I don't.
Good luck, Raj.

311
00:14:19,112 --> 00:14:21,190
You know, I thought our
friendship meant more to you.

312
00:14:21,917 --> 00:14:23,577
So did I.

313
00:14:31,311 --> 00:14:33,578
Do you think
they're gonna call the police?

314
00:14:33,580 --> 00:14:35,505
I don't know.

315
00:14:35,507 --> 00:14:37,805
Maybe they'll call Imperial
Officers to take us

316
00:14:37,807 --> 00:14:40,075
to a holding cell
on the Death Star.

317
00:14:42,874 --> 00:14:46,173
Oh, I think that's below the pay
grade of an Imperial Officer.

318
00:14:46,175 --> 00:14:47,539
Stormtroopers are really
the ones who...

319
00:14:47,541 --> 00:14:49,169
Oh, shut up.

320
00:14:50,177 --> 00:14:51,973
He's right.

321
00:14:51,975 --> 00:14:54,075
Uh, Stormtroopers actually
combine both the function

322
00:14:54,077 --> 00:14:56,239
of infantry and military police.

323
00:14:58,437 --> 00:15:00,432
Uh-huh, I'm normally
very nice,

324
00:15:00,434 --> 00:15:02,165
but you shut up, too.

325
00:15:08,902 --> 00:15:10,394
So...

326
00:15:10,396 --> 00:15:13,198
what are you in for?

327
00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:16,864
Honestly, I just wanted to meet
Mr. Lucas and say thank you.

328
00:15:16,866 --> 00:15:20,357
You know, growing up, the movies
had such an impact on my life.

329
00:15:20,359 --> 00:15:22,659
I never really fit in anywhere.

330
00:15:22,661 --> 00:15:24,697
Till I discovered
the worlds he created

331
00:15:24,699 --> 00:15:27,493
and finally found a place
where I belong.

332
00:15:28,692 --> 00:15:30,791
But why are you here?

333
00:15:30,793 --> 00:15:32,422
Oh, I, uh, I hopped a fence,

334
00:15:32,424 --> 00:15:34,091
and they caught me
in the sculpture gallery

335
00:15:34,093 --> 00:15:36,854
making out
with a Chewbacca statue.

336
00:15:42,915 --> 00:15:44,446
Excuse me.

337
00:15:52,710 --> 00:15:54,610
Leonard,

338
00:15:54,612 --> 00:15:56,879
they have a
sculpture gallery.

339
00:16:00,979 --> 00:16:03,239
All right, I talked
to my supervisor,

340
00:16:03,241 --> 00:16:04,446
and we're gonna let you go
with a warning.

341
00:16:04,448 --> 00:16:06,245
But if you ever
come back,

342
00:16:06,247 --> 00:16:07,907
we will call the police
and press charges.

343
00:16:07,909 --> 00:16:08,906
We understand.

344
00:16:08,908 --> 00:16:09,873
Thank you so much.

345
00:16:09,875 --> 00:16:11,479
Uh, what about me?

346
00:16:11,481 --> 00:16:12,908
No, you're not going
anywhere, kissy face.

347
00:16:12,910 --> 00:16:14,475
Let's go.

348
00:16:14,477 --> 00:16:17,574
I have to take your picture
to post at the guard gate.

349
00:16:17,576 --> 00:16:18,541
Uh, one question

350
00:16:18,543 --> 00:16:20,035
about that picture.

351
00:16:20,037 --> 00:16:21,840
Can it be with
George Lucas?

352
00:16:23,505 --> 00:16:25,636
Ooh, grumpy you are.

353
00:16:30,575 --> 00:16:33,603
Okay, this is the match
that decides it all.

354
00:16:33,605 --> 00:16:34,875
First to 11 wins.

355
00:16:34,877 --> 00:16:37,703
Serve switches
every five points.

356
00:16:37,705 --> 00:16:39,239
And just so you know,
when this started,

357
00:16:39,241 --> 00:16:42,005
I was going to put the TARDIS in
a discreet corner of the house,

358
00:16:42,007 --> 00:16:43,539
but I've since turned
mean, and now it's going

359
00:16:43,541 --> 00:16:45,041
right in the middle
of the living room

360
00:16:45,043 --> 00:16:46,806
on a rotating platform with
a sign that says "suck it."

361
00:16:46,808 --> 00:16:47,973
Game on.

362
00:16:50,372 --> 00:16:51,672
Except...

363
00:16:51,674 --> 00:16:54,038
Raj is gonna win.

364
00:16:54,040 --> 00:16:55,332
Isn't that right, Raj?

365
00:16:55,334 --> 00:16:57,799
Uh, yeah, I mean,
her serve was pretty good.

366
00:16:57,801 --> 00:16:59,332
Come on, get
in her head.

367
00:16:59,334 --> 00:17:00,496
Be intimidating.

368
00:17:00,498 --> 00:17:02,526
Okay, uh...

369
00:17:02,528 --> 00:17:03,692
I'm gonna own you, bitch!

370
00:17:03,694 --> 00:17:05,362
Whoa!
Hey!

371
00:17:05,364 --> 00:17:06,864
That's not nice.

372
00:17:08,129 --> 00:17:09,765
Let's just play.

373
00:17:13,763 --> 00:17:15,064
One-zero.

374
00:17:15,066 --> 00:17:16,630
Two.

375
00:17:16,632 --> 00:17:18,294
Three.

376
00:17:18,296 --> 00:17:20,162
Four.

377
00:17:20,164 --> 00:17:21,960
Five-nothing.

378
00:17:21,962 --> 00:17:23,359
Wait,

379
00:17:23,361 --> 00:17:24,693
did you play badminton

380
00:17:24,695 --> 00:17:27,331
or sad-minton?

381
00:17:27,333 --> 00:17:29,328
Don't listen to him...
all she's got is a serve.

382
00:17:29,330 --> 00:17:32,796
Now, grab a fresh tampon
and put her away.

383
00:17:32,798 --> 00:17:33,795
Wha...?

384
00:17:33,797 --> 00:17:35,292
A-And that's not offensive?

385
00:17:35,294 --> 00:17:36,333
Where's the line?

386
00:17:36,335 --> 00:17:38,466
It's in your purse. Play.

387
00:17:40,667 --> 00:17:42,369
One-five.

388
00:17:43,833 --> 00:17:45,334
Two-five.

389
00:17:45,336 --> 00:17:46,467
Three-five.

390
00:17:46,469 --> 00:17:48,129
Four-five.

391
00:17:49,098 --> 00:17:50,326
Five-five!

392
00:17:51,998 --> 00:17:53,595
Six.

393
00:17:53,597 --> 00:17:54,898
Seven.

394
00:17:54,900 --> 00:17:56,760
Eight. Nine.

395
00:17:57,330 --> 00:17:59,829
Ten-five!

396
00:18:01,135 --> 00:18:03,268
Six.

397
00:18:05,404 --> 00:18:07,169
Seven.

398
00:18:07,171 --> 00:18:08,871
Eight.

399
00:18:08,873 --> 00:18:10,836
Nine.

400
00:18:10,838 --> 00:18:13,864
Ten-ten!

401
00:18:16,232 --> 00:18:18,793
Well, that was
an exciting 40 seconds.

402
00:18:19,930 --> 00:18:22,197
It was, and now
the serve is back to you,

403
00:18:22,199 --> 00:18:23,963
and the game is over.

404
00:18:25,499 --> 00:18:28,199
You know, Amy,
I, uh...

405
00:18:28,201 --> 00:18:30,165
can't help but wonder
how Sheldon would react

406
00:18:30,167 --> 00:18:32,363
if the TARDIS was
at your place.

407
00:18:33,332 --> 00:18:35,361
Don't listen to her,
just hit the ball.

408
00:18:36,202 --> 00:18:37,727
Keep talking.

409
00:18:41,469 --> 00:18:44,297
If this doesn't get him
into your bedroom,

410
00:18:44,299 --> 00:18:45,967
nothing will.

411
00:18:52,371 --> 00:18:53,831
Are you still
mad at me?

412
00:18:53,833 --> 00:18:57,502
Yes, we missed our lecture,
we were almost arrested,

413
00:18:57,504 --> 00:18:59,501
and you got me locked
in a room with a man

414
00:18:59,503 --> 00:19:04,001
who forced his tongue down the
throat of a stuffed Wookiee.

415
00:19:05,105 --> 00:19:07,365
Boy, some people are just
glass-half-empty.

416
00:19:08,135 --> 00:19:09,899
The glass is
empty, Sheldon.

417
00:19:09,901 --> 00:19:11,138
It's completely empty.

418
00:19:11,140 --> 00:19:13,135
If you gave that glass to a
man who was dying of thirst,

419
00:19:13,137 --> 00:19:15,165
he would be dead,
do you know why?

420
00:19:15,167 --> 00:19:18,266
Before I answer,
was he a smoker?

421
00:19:23,005 --> 00:19:25,033
I think you're looking
at this all wrong.

422
00:19:25,035 --> 00:19:27,629
Fine, then tell me
how I should be looking at it.

423
00:19:27,631 --> 00:19:31,929
Well, not only did we go to
Skywalker Ranch, we got in.

424
00:19:31,931 --> 00:19:34,230
No one we know
can say that.

425
00:19:34,232 --> 00:19:37,563
And for all the times
you find me irritating,

426
00:19:37,565 --> 00:19:40,834
today you got to watch
someone shoot me with a Taser.

427
00:19:44,074 --> 00:19:46,803
That part was pretty good.

428
00:19:46,805 --> 00:19:48,496
See?

429
00:19:48,498 --> 00:19:51,468
You did flop around a lot.

430
00:19:51,470 --> 00:19:53,732
I'll take your word for it.

431
00:19:53,734 --> 00:19:56,835
I was too busy
trying not to defecate.

432
00:19:58,668 --> 00:20:01,000
You know, when they were
escorting us

433
00:20:01,002 --> 00:20:04,236
to the detaining room,
I looked through a door,

434
00:20:04,238 --> 00:20:06,202
and I'm pretty sure
I saw a display case

435
00:20:06,204 --> 00:20:08,135
with the Ark
of the Covenant.

436
00:20:08,137 --> 00:20:10,467
That's amazing.
I know.

437
00:20:10,469 --> 00:20:13,736
And I saw Jabba the Hutt
riding by on a motorcycle.

438
00:20:13,738 --> 00:20:16,134
Although that was
right after the Tasing,

439
00:20:16,136 --> 00:20:18,205
so who can
say for sure?

440
00:20:19,701 --> 00:20:22,462
I-I guess this could count
as an adventure.

441
00:20:22,464 --> 00:20:23,733
It was.

442
00:20:23,735 --> 00:20:26,361
And even though we're
not allowed back there,

443
00:20:26,363 --> 00:20:28,664
they can never take
today away from us.

444
00:20:29,369 --> 00:20:31,395
Unlike my sense
of smell,

445
00:20:31,397 --> 00:20:33,960
which hasn't returned
since the Tasing.

446
00:20:36,597 --> 00:20:38,130
No, I got nothing.

447
00:20:47,243 --> 00:20:50,604
Amy, the Daleks
are right on my tail!

448
00:20:50,606 --> 00:20:52,939
Quick, we need to reset
the time circuits.

449
00:20:52,941 --> 00:20:56,105
Oh, no, I left my sonic
screwdriver behind.

450
00:21:00,832 --> 00:21:02,390
Really should have
thought this through.

451
00:21:03,650 --> 00:21:10,144
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man