1
00:00:05,459 --> 00:00:06,326
We're pinned down!

2
00:00:06,328 --> 00:00:07,428
We can't get through!

3
00:00:07,430 --> 00:00:09,031
Sheldon, get over here and help!

4
00:00:09,033 --> 00:00:10,635
Okay, one second.

5
00:00:12,941 --> 00:00:15,177
Sheldon, why are you
jumping up and down?

6
00:00:15,179 --> 00:00:16,680
I'm trying to shoot.

7
00:00:16,682 --> 00:00:17,816
Then use the shoot button,

8
00:00:17,818 --> 00:00:20,420
not the "wonderful thing
about Tiggers" button!

9
00:00:20,422 --> 00:00:22,792
Aw.

10
00:00:22,794 --> 00:00:24,696
That's it, we're dead.

11
00:00:24,698 --> 00:00:26,065
Okay, challenge them again.

12
00:00:26,067 --> 00:00:28,036
Doing it right now.

13
00:00:28,038 --> 00:00:29,271
Oh, they can't.

14
00:00:29,273 --> 00:00:33,013
There's an important
Little League game tomorrow.

15
00:00:33,015 --> 00:00:36,820
No wonder they beat us,
they're jocks.

16
00:00:36,822 --> 00:00:38,624
What happened to me?

17
00:00:38,626 --> 00:00:40,527
I used to excel at these things.

18
00:00:40,529 --> 00:00:42,464
Kids are always better
at video games.

19
00:00:42,466 --> 00:00:44,402
Well, I don't like it.

20
00:00:44,404 --> 00:00:46,847
Mm, if it makes you feel better,
you still dress like a child.

21
00:00:48,211 --> 00:00:49,545
No, but it's not
just video games.

22
00:00:49,547 --> 00:00:52,384
I downloaded the new O.S.
for my phone, took me a week

23
00:00:52,386 --> 00:00:56,025
to stop accidentally texting
kissy faces to everyone.

24
00:00:56,027 --> 00:00:58,731
Oh, so our love is not real?

25
00:00:58,733 --> 00:01:01,402
Well, I-I know how you feel.

26
00:01:01,404 --> 00:01:04,008
I tried one of those
electronic Japanese toilets,

27
00:01:04,010 --> 00:01:07,314
practically shot myself
across the room.

28
00:01:08,285 --> 00:01:09,653
I guess I just need to face it,

29
00:01:09,655 --> 00:01:11,255
I'm no longer a wunderkind.

30
00:01:11,257 --> 00:01:14,428
Now I just
wonder what's for lunch.

31
00:01:14,430 --> 00:01:15,263
Hot dogs.

32
00:01:15,265 --> 00:01:17,936
Yay.

33
00:01:40,241 --> 00:01:42,243
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man

34
00:01:42,498 --> 00:01:44,823
I didn't know you could drink
while you're breastfeeding.

35
00:01:44,853 --> 00:01:47,654
Yeah, they say the yeast in beer
helps with milk production.

36
00:01:47,656 --> 00:01:49,991
I'm pretty sure that's a myth,
let me check.

37
00:01:49,993 --> 00:01:53,064
Ruin it for me and I'll break
this glass over your head.

38
00:01:53,066 --> 00:01:55,535
To denial.

39
00:01:57,074 --> 00:01:58,174
Oh, I'm gonna get another.

40
00:01:58,176 --> 00:01:59,610
You want food?

41
00:01:59,612 --> 00:02:03,051
Yeah, breastfeeding burns, like,
5,000 calories a day.

42
00:02:03,053 --> 00:02:04,821
Do not touch that phone.

43
00:02:08,463 --> 00:02:09,664
Penny?

44
00:02:09,666 --> 00:02:11,868
Oh, Zack. Hey.

45
00:02:11,870 --> 00:02:13,471
What are the odds
of running into you here?

46
00:02:13,473 --> 00:02:16,377
Well, it's a bar,
so pretty good.

47
00:02:16,379 --> 00:02:18,214
Uh, what's new?

48
00:02:18,216 --> 00:02:19,416
Oh, tons of stuff.

49
00:02:19,418 --> 00:02:21,988
Put artificial grass
in my backyard, got engaged,

50
00:02:21,990 --> 00:02:26,330
had a scary mole
that turned out to be Sharpie.

51
00:02:26,332 --> 00:02:27,667
Well, congratulations.

52
00:02:27,669 --> 00:02:30,004
That's what
my dermatologist said.

53
00:02:30,006 --> 00:02:32,710
No, on-on getting engaged,
good for you.

54
00:02:32,712 --> 00:02:34,213
Oh, thanks. How about you?

55
00:02:34,215 --> 00:02:35,315
Hey, how's Leonard?

56
00:02:35,317 --> 00:02:36,718
Is he still smart?

57
00:02:37,721 --> 00:02:39,890
Yes, yes, he's working
for the government

58
00:02:39,892 --> 00:02:42,061
on an infinite
persistence gyroscope.

59
00:02:42,063 --> 00:02:43,466
Of course, the first time
I say it right,

60
00:02:43,467 --> 00:02:45,335
he's not even here.

61
00:02:45,337 --> 00:02:46,806
I love that little guy.

62
00:02:46,808 --> 00:02:49,143
Hey, we should
all have dinner sometime.

63
00:02:49,145 --> 00:02:51,047
Uh, yeah, sure,
I'll check with Leonard.

64
00:02:51,049 --> 00:02:53,218
Cool, I'll check with Sara.

65
00:02:53,220 --> 00:02:56,324
Sara, pull up my calendar.

66
00:02:58,130 --> 00:03:00,199
It never works for me.

67
00:03:03,507 --> 00:03:07,479
I've been thinking about
our recent humiliation.

68
00:03:07,481 --> 00:03:10,018
You're gonna
have to be more specific.

69
00:03:10,020 --> 00:03:12,356
At the hands of those teenagers.

70
00:03:12,358 --> 00:03:15,329
More.

71
00:03:16,199 --> 00:03:17,934
Boy teenagers.

72
00:03:17,936 --> 00:03:20,138
Oh, the video game.
Yeah, that was bad.

73
00:03:20,140 --> 00:03:23,880
I started doing some reading
on cognitive vitality,

74
00:03:23,882 --> 00:03:28,121
and I came across an area of
research called "super-aging."

75
00:03:28,123 --> 00:03:29,992
You know who's a super-ager?
Jennifer Lopez.

76
00:03:29,994 --> 00:03:32,263
Like, what is her secret?

77
00:03:33,100 --> 00:03:35,035
Now, this is rare.

78
00:03:35,037 --> 00:03:39,210
I don't know which one of you
I want to stop talking first.

79
00:03:39,212 --> 00:03:41,147
The theory

80
00:03:41,149 --> 00:03:42,784
is that if you really tax
your brain,

81
00:03:42,786 --> 00:03:44,721
the neurofibers
will become thicker

82
00:03:44,723 --> 00:03:46,992
and the glial cells
more lustrous.

83
00:03:46,994 --> 00:03:49,297
Like JLo's hair.

84
00:03:49,299 --> 00:03:53,305
Boy, it is neck and
neck right now.

85
00:03:53,307 --> 00:03:55,042
How is super-aging any different

86
00:03:55,044 --> 00:03:56,812
than, like,
doing crossword puzzles?

87
00:03:56,814 --> 00:03:58,783
Well, it's not just doing
simple cognitive tasks.

88
00:03:58,785 --> 00:04:00,920
You need to push your brain
out of its comfort zone

89
00:04:00,922 --> 00:04:02,991
and reach mental exhaustion.

90
00:04:02,993 --> 00:04:04,661
I drive you to work every day,

91
00:04:04,663 --> 00:04:06,699
my brain must look
like the Hulk.

92
00:04:08,170 --> 00:04:10,138
If you really want
to challenge yourself,

93
00:04:10,140 --> 00:04:11,709
you could learn to speak Hindi.

94
00:04:11,711 --> 00:04:15,582
Jab mein aat saal ka
tha Maine seekha tha.

95
00:04:16,821 --> 00:04:18,355
Could you say that in English?

96
00:04:18,357 --> 00:04:20,292
I actually, I never
learned Hindi.

97
00:04:23,300 --> 00:04:25,235
Hey, you ready to go?

98
00:04:25,237 --> 00:04:26,805
Yeah, I guess.

99
00:04:26,807 --> 00:04:28,575
What's the matter?

100
00:04:28,577 --> 00:04:30,545
Honestly? It's a little strange

101
00:04:30,547 --> 00:04:32,049
having dinner
with your ex-boyfriend,

102
00:04:32,051 --> 00:04:34,220
and it's not like
we have a lot to talk about.

103
00:04:34,222 --> 00:04:36,024
What? He loves you, okay?

104
00:04:36,026 --> 00:04:37,393
And he's interested
in your work.

105
00:04:37,395 --> 00:04:40,833
You could talk about
the infinite perspective...

106
00:04:40,835 --> 00:04:43,338
I swear I know it.

107
00:04:43,340 --> 00:04:45,375
It'll be fine, let's just go.

108
00:04:45,377 --> 00:04:47,179
Well, and his fiancée will
be there, so you know,

109
00:04:47,181 --> 00:04:49,751
if the conversation lags, we
can talk about their wedding.

110
00:04:51,056 --> 00:04:52,657
Come on, I spent
an entire plane ride

111
00:04:52,659 --> 00:04:54,995
with you talking about
the trailer for Deadpool 2.

112
00:04:54,997 --> 00:04:57,366
Ha! I knew you weren't asleep.

113
00:04:59,038 --> 00:05:00,172
Hey, guys.

114
00:05:00,174 --> 00:05:02,009
Hi.
Hi. Hey, where's your fiancée?

115
00:05:02,011 --> 00:05:04,380
Oh, she couldn't make it.
She had an emergency.

116
00:05:04,382 --> 00:05:05,716
Oh, no, what happened?

117
00:05:05,718 --> 00:05:08,388
I didn't ask.

118
00:05:11,029 --> 00:05:12,396
Hey.

119
00:05:12,398 --> 00:05:13,766
- Hey.
- Hey.

120
00:05:13,768 --> 00:05:15,535
What smells so good?

121
00:05:15,537 --> 00:05:17,740
Raj is teaching me
to make croissants.

122
00:05:17,742 --> 00:05:20,178
Is this part
of your super-aging?

123
00:05:20,180 --> 00:05:22,583
Yes. Yeah, it seemed
daunting at first,

124
00:05:22,585 --> 00:05:23,719
but then I realized,

125
00:05:23,721 --> 00:05:26,390
it's like the chemistry set
I had as a kid.

126
00:05:26,392 --> 00:05:27,392
Only, when your brother
eats this,

127
00:05:27,394 --> 00:05:29,430
no one has to call
Poison Control.

128
00:05:29,432 --> 00:05:31,000
Okay.

129
00:05:31,002 --> 00:05:32,937
Shall we?

130
00:05:36,346 --> 00:05:38,214
Oh, my God.

131
00:05:38,216 --> 00:05:42,589
It's light, it's
flaky, it's buttery.

132
00:05:42,591 --> 00:05:45,830
You don't need to have sex with
him, just eat one of these.

133
00:05:47,034 --> 00:05:48,936
Yes, it is delicious.

134
00:05:48,938 --> 00:05:51,440
Wha... Physicist,
baker, lover,

135
00:05:51,442 --> 00:05:52,644
what can't I do?

136
00:05:52,646 --> 00:05:55,917
Well, clearly mental
tasks are not enough.

137
00:05:55,919 --> 00:05:58,021
Maybe you need to challenge
your motor skills.

138
00:05:58,023 --> 00:06:01,060
For the last time, I am not
having a tickle fight with you.

139
00:06:02,498 --> 00:06:03,699
You want a real challenge,

140
00:06:03,701 --> 00:06:06,772
try keeping me from
eating more of these.

141
00:06:06,774 --> 00:06:09,210
You're just using food

142
00:06:09,212 --> 00:06:11,080
to mask the fear that
you're fundamentally unlovable

143
00:06:11,082 --> 00:06:14,253
and therefore
going to be alone forever.

144
00:06:14,255 --> 00:06:17,192
Damn it, he's good at that, too.

145
00:06:20,467 --> 00:06:22,002
Thanks.

146
00:06:22,004 --> 00:06:24,406
Wow, working on a top secret
government project,

147
00:06:24,408 --> 00:06:26,712
that is so cool.
Aw.

148
00:06:26,714 --> 00:06:29,516
Do you have a bodyguard
to keep spies away?

149
00:06:29,518 --> 00:06:32,857
I have Sheldon,
that keeps most people away.

150
00:06:34,161 --> 00:06:35,295
I miss that guy.

151
00:06:35,297 --> 00:06:37,299
He's like
the Swedish Chef Muppet.

152
00:06:37,301 --> 00:06:40,038
I don't know what he's saying,
but he's funny.

153
00:06:40,040 --> 00:06:44,013
Oh, I know what he's saying,
and he's not, he's not funny.

154
00:06:44,015 --> 00:06:46,117
So, Penny,
what's going on with you?

155
00:06:46,119 --> 00:06:47,954
How's the job?

156
00:06:47,956 --> 00:06:49,991
Uh, it's okay, I'm still
in pharmaceutical sales.

157
00:06:49,993 --> 00:06:51,327
She's doing amazing.

158
00:06:51,329 --> 00:06:53,131
She can actually make
a side effect,

159
00:06:53,133 --> 00:06:55,268
like 10% chance
of liver failure,

160
00:06:55,270 --> 00:06:59,310
sound like a 90% chance
of liver success.

161
00:06:59,312 --> 00:07:01,882
Yeah, lying isn't
my favorite part of the job.

162
00:07:01,884 --> 00:07:04,486
Actually, I'm not crazy
about a lot of it.

163
00:07:04,488 --> 00:07:05,455
Hey, if you're not happy there,
I've been looking

164
00:07:05,457 --> 00:07:07,125
for a new head of sales
at my company.

165
00:07:07,127 --> 00:07:09,530
And we don't sell drugs,
just menus,

166
00:07:09,532 --> 00:07:10,766
so the only lie
you'll be telling

167
00:07:10,768 --> 00:07:12,937
is we print on recycled paper.

168
00:07:14,876 --> 00:07:17,112
We don't.

169
00:07:18,049 --> 00:07:20,318
Oh, that's a nice offer.

170
00:07:20,320 --> 00:07:21,587
You know,
we'd make a great team.

171
00:07:21,589 --> 00:07:23,759
Or as we say
in the menu business,

172
00:07:23,761 --> 00:07:26,932
I can't do this
without "Me N U."

173
00:07:27,836 --> 00:07:30,806
Right, 'cause it spells "menu."

174
00:07:30,808 --> 00:07:32,977
Yeah, right? It's funny.
I got a lot of menu jokes,

175
00:07:32,979 --> 00:07:34,881
but that's my favorite.

176
00:07:37,722 --> 00:07:41,327
All right, this is everything.

177
00:07:41,329 --> 00:07:42,864
What do you want to learn?

178
00:07:42,866 --> 00:07:45,435
It really doesn't matter,
as long as it's challenging.

179
00:07:45,437 --> 00:07:49,443
Okay, well, how about,
oh, I teach you

180
00:07:49,445 --> 00:07:52,884
some close-up... magic.

181
00:07:52,886 --> 00:07:55,823
Howard, I'm trying
to make myself uncomfortable,

182
00:07:55,825 --> 00:07:57,526
not everyone else.

183
00:07:58,931 --> 00:08:00,966
So you wanted to learn
something physical

184
00:08:00,968 --> 00:08:03,271
and you came
to Howard Wolowitz?

185
00:08:04,275 --> 00:08:06,343
Hey, the circus arts

186
00:08:06,345 --> 00:08:09,049
are very physically
and mentally demanding.

187
00:08:09,051 --> 00:08:10,853
Have you ever tried to juggle?

188
00:08:10,855 --> 00:08:12,422
Yes, I'm juggling
my love for you

189
00:08:12,424 --> 00:08:15,061
and my embarrassment of you
right now.

190
00:08:15,063 --> 00:08:18,936
And it's hard, isn't it?

191
00:08:20,440 --> 00:08:22,442
So the key is,

192
00:08:22,444 --> 00:08:25,048
the moment one ball
is at the top of its arc,

193
00:08:25,050 --> 00:08:26,885
you toss the next one.

194
00:08:26,887 --> 00:08:28,922
Hmm?
Okay, I think I got that.

195
00:08:28,924 --> 00:08:30,525
Uh, h-hold on.

196
00:08:30,527 --> 00:08:33,665
There's a, an old saying
in juggling.

197
00:08:33,667 --> 00:08:35,636
Is it "I'm going to die alone"?

198
00:08:38,510 --> 00:08:42,382
No, it's "if you want
to have fun, start with one."

199
00:08:43,152 --> 00:08:44,888
Yours we think,
but we do not say.

200
00:08:45,992 --> 00:08:48,427
All right, just toss it up
and catch it a few times,

201
00:08:48,429 --> 00:08:49,463
get comfortable with it.

202
00:08:49,465 --> 00:08:50,833
Okay.

203
00:08:56,112 --> 00:08:57,579
Just to be on the safe side,

204
00:08:57,581 --> 00:09:00,753
am I in any danger of
getting juggler's elbow?

205
00:09:00,755 --> 00:09:02,623
No.

206
00:09:02,625 --> 00:09:07,299
Are you sure? 'Cause
I'm feeling a twinge.

207
00:09:08,536 --> 00:09:10,104
See, that wasn't so bad.

208
00:09:10,106 --> 00:09:11,273
He even picked up the check.

209
00:09:11,275 --> 00:09:12,475
Yeah.

210
00:09:12,477 --> 00:09:14,079
Although, when he was trying
to figure out the tip,

211
00:09:14,081 --> 00:09:16,116
I'm pretty sure I saw smoke
coming out of his ears.

212
00:09:18,724 --> 00:09:21,193
You're not really considering
working for him, are you?

213
00:09:21,195 --> 00:09:23,932
Well, maybe, I mean, it
seems kind of perfect.

214
00:09:23,934 --> 00:09:25,602
I have sales experience,

215
00:09:25,604 --> 00:09:27,606
and I've been a waitress,
so I have restaurant experience,

216
00:09:27,608 --> 00:09:30,044
and if he's figuring out
my Christmas bonus,

217
00:09:30,046 --> 00:09:31,848
we could buy a boat.

218
00:09:31,850 --> 00:09:34,721
Don't you think it might
be a little weird

219
00:09:34,723 --> 00:09:36,758
to work for someone
you used to date?

220
00:09:36,760 --> 00:09:40,633
You work with Sheldon,
you tell me.

221
00:09:40,635 --> 00:09:44,172
Yeah, it's weird.

222
00:09:47,581 --> 00:09:50,719
Okay, are you seriously jealous
of me working with Zack?

223
00:09:50,721 --> 00:09:52,422
No, no, I-I'm not jealous,
I just think

224
00:09:52,424 --> 00:09:54,694
you have got a good thing
going where you are right now,

225
00:09:54,696 --> 00:09:55,963
and you make
great money

226
00:09:55,965 --> 00:09:57,767
and you haven't slept
with any of your coworkers.

227
00:09:57,769 --> 00:10:02,275
Great, so you want me to stay
at a job I'm not happy at?

228
00:10:02,277 --> 00:10:03,879
Uh...

229
00:10:03,881 --> 00:10:05,214
You okay?

230
00:10:05,216 --> 00:10:08,622
You kind of look like Zack
trying to figure out that tip.

231
00:10:09,591 --> 00:10:12,763
Of course I don't want
you to be unhappy,

232
00:10:12,765 --> 00:10:14,399
but I also want
you to be smart,

233
00:10:14,401 --> 00:10:17,172
and working for an ex-boyfriend
isn't very smart.

234
00:10:19,295 --> 00:10:21,417
You don't have to stop,
just slow down, I'll jump out.

235
00:10:27,351 --> 00:10:29,752
Amy, look,
I'm on a unicycle!

236
00:10:31,052 --> 00:10:35,192
How did you get
from croissants to a unicycle?

237
00:10:35,194 --> 00:10:37,396
I hurt myself juggling.

238
00:10:38,166 --> 00:10:39,935
Where did
you get it?

239
00:10:39,937 --> 00:10:41,204
Howard said
I could borrow it,

240
00:10:41,206 --> 00:10:44,010
Bernadette said forever.

241
00:10:44,012 --> 00:10:46,414
Have you tried
letting go of the rope?

242
00:10:46,416 --> 00:10:49,553
What, are you crazy?
I'm on a unicycle.

243
00:10:49,555 --> 00:10:51,859
All right, well, have fun.

244
00:10:51,861 --> 00:10:53,663
Wait, I need help
getting down.

245
00:10:53,665 --> 00:10:55,867
Well, what do you want me to do?

246
00:10:55,869 --> 00:10:57,169
Drag out our mattress
and put it over here,

247
00:10:57,171 --> 00:10:58,673
then go across the hall,
get their mattress

248
00:10:58,675 --> 00:10:59,708
and put it over here.

249
00:10:59,710 --> 00:11:01,277
But before you
do any of that,

250
00:11:01,279 --> 00:11:03,048
scratch my nose.

251
00:11:07,124 --> 00:11:09,593
So you told her
she was being dumb?

252
00:11:09,595 --> 00:11:13,468
No, I told her she was
being not smart.

253
00:11:14,238 --> 00:11:17,109
Which was dumb.

254
00:11:17,111 --> 00:11:19,781
Why did you even go
to dinner with the guy?

255
00:11:19,783 --> 00:11:21,952
We covered this, I'm dumb.

256
00:11:24,025 --> 00:11:25,827
So he's my ex-boyfriend,
who cares?

257
00:11:25,829 --> 00:11:27,797
I can't believe Leonard
would be so insecure.

258
00:11:27,799 --> 00:11:29,033
Really?

259
00:11:29,035 --> 00:11:31,905
I have no trouble
believing that at all.

260
00:11:31,907 --> 00:11:33,608
And Zack's engaged.

261
00:11:33,610 --> 00:11:35,612
Leonard has no reason
to feel threatened.

262
00:11:35,614 --> 00:11:38,518
We're talking about
the same Leonard, right?

263
00:11:40,090 --> 00:11:42,627
So you think it's fine
if she works for Zack?

264
00:11:42,629 --> 00:11:44,230
I don't know, maybe.

265
00:11:44,232 --> 00:11:47,102
Well, he is much more
attractive than Leonard.

266
00:11:47,973 --> 00:11:49,373
Yes,

267
00:11:49,375 --> 00:11:53,014
but that's gonna be true of
a lot of guys she works for.

268
00:11:54,419 --> 00:11:56,955
Yeah, but she also
used to sleep with Zack.

269
00:11:57,759 --> 00:11:59,293
Again...

270
00:12:01,867 --> 00:12:03,936
I would never let Howard
work with an ex.

271
00:12:03,938 --> 00:12:05,005
What, you wouldn't trust him?

272
00:12:05,007 --> 00:12:06,642
I wouldn't trust her.

273
00:12:06,644 --> 00:12:10,482
He's thin and sexy
like a Jewish greyhound.

274
00:12:12,288 --> 00:12:15,626
Yeah, that-that is
the sexiest dog.

275
00:12:16,831 --> 00:12:18,298
And I'd like to think
Howie wouldn't take a job

276
00:12:18,300 --> 00:12:19,567
I was uncomfortable with.

277
00:12:19,569 --> 00:12:20,970
'Cause he's scared of you?
Terrified.

278
00:12:20,972 --> 00:12:22,172
Yeah.

279
00:12:23,343 --> 00:12:25,312
You know what? I'm with
Leonard, this isn't cool.

280
00:12:25,314 --> 00:12:26,715
Thank you.

281
00:12:26,717 --> 00:12:27,851
I disagree.

282
00:12:27,853 --> 00:12:30,055
Penny is a strong,
independent woman.

283
00:12:30,057 --> 00:12:32,426
The more you try to control her,
the more she'll push back.

284
00:12:32,428 --> 00:12:33,863
So you think it's okay?

285
00:12:33,865 --> 00:12:35,565
Oh, no, she's gonna leave you
for someone,

286
00:12:35,567 --> 00:12:37,704
might as well
get it over with.

287
00:12:42,883 --> 00:12:44,183
What are you doing?

288
00:12:44,185 --> 00:12:46,420
I'm returning this stuff
to Howard.

289
00:12:46,422 --> 00:12:47,790
Oh.

290
00:12:47,792 --> 00:12:49,794
Well, Bernadette made me
promise if you didn't want it,

291
00:12:49,796 --> 00:12:52,399
we'd give it
to a homeless clown.

292
00:12:54,505 --> 00:12:56,440
What happened to
learning the unicycle?

293
00:12:56,442 --> 00:12:58,178
Oh, I stopped that,
it was dumb.

294
00:12:58,180 --> 00:13:03,789
Uni, bi, tri, menstrual,
all cycles are dumb.

295
00:13:03,791 --> 00:13:05,760
You said juggling was dumb, too.

296
00:13:05,762 --> 00:13:07,362
Well, it is.

297
00:13:07,364 --> 00:13:10,569
If I wanted to hold three things
at once, I'd wear cargo pants.

298
00:13:10,571 --> 00:13:12,306
Sheldon, is it possible that

299
00:13:12,308 --> 00:13:16,314
when things get really
difficult, you just give up?

300
00:13:16,316 --> 00:13:18,686
Are you calling me a quitter?

301
00:13:18,688 --> 00:13:20,555
Well, if you honestly...

302
00:13:20,557 --> 00:13:21,825
This conversation
is over.

303
00:13:26,637 --> 00:13:28,104
His mother warned me.

304
00:13:28,941 --> 00:13:30,542
Everybody warned me.

305
00:13:32,381 --> 00:13:33,882
Actually, he warned me.

306
00:13:38,694 --> 00:13:41,264
Hey.
Hi.

307
00:13:41,266 --> 00:13:42,366
You want to talk?

308
00:13:42,368 --> 00:13:45,840
That doesn't seem to be
where I shine.

309
00:13:47,144 --> 00:13:49,280
How about I just give you
one of these?

310
00:13:50,484 --> 00:13:52,787
Look, we can have a
reasonable conversation

311
00:13:52,789 --> 00:13:54,056
and I won't get mad.

312
00:13:56,362 --> 00:14:00,168
I don't like it after sex,
and I don't like it now.

313
00:14:04,713 --> 00:14:06,948
Yeah, sorry.
Yeah.

314
00:14:06,950 --> 00:14:08,351
All right,
just come here.

315
00:14:09,388 --> 00:14:11,357
Look, I get me working
with Zack is weird

316
00:14:11,359 --> 00:14:12,994
and I don't want you
to be uncomfortable.

317
00:14:12,996 --> 00:14:14,563
Well, thanks.

318
00:14:14,565 --> 00:14:17,069
And I don't want you to be
stuck at a job you don't like.

319
00:14:17,071 --> 00:14:18,471
Then what do we do?

320
00:14:18,473 --> 00:14:20,008
Well, I don't love it,
but if you really want

321
00:14:20,010 --> 00:14:22,145
to take this job, I'll find
a way to deal with it.

322
00:14:22,147 --> 00:14:24,651
No, I know you'll try,
but it'll make you miserable,

323
00:14:24,653 --> 00:14:26,520
which will make me
miserable, and...

324
00:14:26,522 --> 00:14:28,524
I'm just gonna stay
where I'm at for now.

325
00:14:28,526 --> 00:14:29,961
No, no, no, no,
you're-you're unhappy there

326
00:14:29,963 --> 00:14:32,099
and then you're gonna blame
me for making you stay,

327
00:14:32,101 --> 00:14:34,269
and it's fine, I'll
just... I'll suck it up.

328
00:14:34,271 --> 00:14:36,073
You don't need to do that,
it's okay.

329
00:14:36,075 --> 00:14:38,077
Yeah, see, now I feel terrible,

330
00:14:38,079 --> 00:14:40,950
like I'm being selfish
and holding you back.

331
00:14:44,993 --> 00:14:46,795
What? Say something.

332
00:14:51,072 --> 00:14:52,572
Yeah, that is pretty annoying.

333
00:14:56,884 --> 00:14:57,884
I made you tea.

334
00:14:57,886 --> 00:14:59,486
Thank you.

335
00:14:59,488 --> 00:15:01,323
I'm sorry I called you
a quitter.

336
00:15:01,325 --> 00:15:04,664
It's okay, I stopped being
upset about that.

337
00:15:04,666 --> 00:15:07,536
And no, the irony
is not lost on me.

338
00:15:08,506 --> 00:15:09,908
What are you reading?

339
00:15:09,910 --> 00:15:11,978
This article says the
peak age for making

340
00:15:11,980 --> 00:15:14,216
a Nobel Prize-winning
discovery is 40.

341
00:15:14,218 --> 00:15:15,218
So?

342
00:15:15,220 --> 00:15:17,589
So I'm running out of time.

343
00:15:17,591 --> 00:15:20,528
That's ridiculous,
you're a brilliant man.

344
00:15:20,530 --> 00:15:23,067
The best years of your life
are still ahead of you.

345
00:15:23,069 --> 00:15:26,540
Oh, you have to say that,
you're sweet on me.

346
00:15:26,542 --> 00:15:28,211
Well, if you're really
worried about your career,

347
00:15:28,213 --> 00:15:30,649
maybe you should consider
spending a little less time

348
00:15:30,651 --> 00:15:32,586
with video games
and comic books.

349
00:15:32,588 --> 00:15:33,989
Hey!

350
00:15:33,991 --> 00:15:36,460
I thought you were sweet on me.

351
00:15:36,462 --> 00:15:39,801
Okay, fine, let's say you
never win a Nobel Prize.

352
00:15:39,803 --> 00:15:42,707
Let's say you spend your life
doing solid scientific research

353
00:15:42,709 --> 00:15:44,142
surrounded by
friends and loved ones

354
00:15:44,144 --> 00:15:45,946
who appreciate you,

355
00:15:45,948 --> 00:15:49,754
not for what you've accomplished
but for who you are as a man.

356
00:15:49,756 --> 00:15:52,125
Wouldn't that be
a life well-lived?

357
00:15:53,029 --> 00:15:54,496
You're so cute.

358
00:15:55,701 --> 00:15:57,870
I'm gonna go learn
how to walk on stilts.

359
00:16:01,445 --> 00:16:02,647
So many warnings.

360
00:16:06,556 --> 00:16:07,890
Okay, are you sure
about this?

361
00:16:07,892 --> 00:16:09,928
Absolutely. I just
want you to be happy.

362
00:16:09,930 --> 00:16:13,167
And maybe a little turned on
about how selfless I'm being.

363
00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:17,442
Penny, what's up?

364
00:16:17,444 --> 00:16:20,315
Hey, uh, so I've been
thinking about it

365
00:16:20,317 --> 00:16:22,018
and I want to take the job.

366
00:16:22,020 --> 00:16:24,056
Oh, bad news.

367
00:16:24,058 --> 00:16:26,327
When my fiancée found out
that I was offering a job

368
00:16:26,329 --> 00:16:28,932
to my ex-girlfriend,
she said it was a stupid idea

369
00:16:28,934 --> 00:16:31,270
and threw a shoe at me.

370
00:16:32,140 --> 00:16:34,677
Oh, so
there's no job?

371
00:16:34,679 --> 00:16:38,551
Nope, just a little bump
on my forehead.

372
00:16:38,553 --> 00:16:40,121
Okay, thanks anyway.

373
00:16:40,123 --> 00:16:41,490
By

374
00:16:42,327 --> 00:16:44,129
Well, his
fiancée thought

375
00:16:44,131 --> 00:16:46,635
the idea of us working
together was stupid.

376
00:16:46,637 --> 00:16:48,604
You were right, I was wrong.

377
00:16:54,318 --> 00:16:55,351
Aren't you gonna say anything?

378
00:16:55,353 --> 00:16:57,489
Not if I want to be
doing this later.

379
00:17:03,569 --> 00:17:05,038
Hey, I didn't know
you were home.

380
00:17:05,040 --> 00:17:06,140
Where you been?

381
00:17:06,142 --> 00:17:08,411
I went to
see your mom.

382
00:17:08,413 --> 00:17:09,881
Seriously,
where were you?

383
00:17:09,883 --> 00:17:12,285
I just told you, your mom's.

384
00:17:12,287 --> 00:17:13,789
Why?

385
00:17:13,791 --> 00:17:17,228
Well, since you find my magic
tricks so embarrassing,

386
00:17:17,230 --> 00:17:18,732
I got to wondering

387
00:17:18,734 --> 00:17:21,971
what cool hobbies
you had as a kid.

388
00:17:21,973 --> 00:17:23,875
Oh.

389
00:17:23,877 --> 00:17:26,547
What'd she say?

390
00:17:26,549 --> 00:17:28,451
She didn't say much of anything.

391
00:17:28,453 --> 00:17:30,321
But she said a lot!

392
00:17:33,529 --> 00:17:36,066
Hi, Bernadette, remember me?

393
00:17:38,439 --> 00:17:40,475
First of all, that's not
what she sounds like,

394
00:17:40,477 --> 00:17:43,013
she's from South Carolina.

395
00:17:43,015 --> 00:17:45,585
I can't believe
you made fun of me

396
00:17:45,587 --> 00:17:49,927
all these years while you
were a closeted ventriloquist.

397
00:17:49,929 --> 00:17:53,835
Okay, it's not like I wanted
to be a ventriloquist.

398
00:17:53,837 --> 00:17:56,273
I was in beauty pageants
and I needed a talent

399
00:17:56,275 --> 00:17:57,308
besides spreading rumors

400
00:17:57,310 --> 00:17:59,847
that the other contestants
were pregnant.

401
00:17:59,849 --> 00:18:02,418
Well, since you enjoyed

402
00:18:02,420 --> 00:18:04,089
getting rid of all my stuff,
you know,

403
00:18:04,091 --> 00:18:06,460
maybe we should throw this
little lady in the wood chipper.

404
00:18:06,462 --> 00:18:07,763
No!

405
00:18:07,765 --> 00:18:09,801
And the little lady has a name.

406
00:18:09,803 --> 00:18:11,671
Which is?

407
00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:16,613
Tammy Jo St. Cloud.

408
00:18:17,484 --> 00:18:20,154
"Tammy Jo St. Cloud."

409
00:18:20,156 --> 00:18:22,025
Oh, and I'm a dork for juggling.

410
00:18:22,027 --> 00:18:24,563
Sorry, you're
not a dork.

411
00:18:24,565 --> 00:18:27,335
You're a clown.

412
00:18:28,506 --> 00:18:29,974
Tammy Jo, don't say that,

413
00:18:29,976 --> 00:18:31,210
you'll make him feel bad.

414
00:18:31,947 --> 00:18:33,147
Look at him,

415
00:18:33,149 --> 00:18:36,019
what reason he got to feel good?

416
00:18:36,857 --> 00:18:39,292
All right, very funny.

417
00:18:39,294 --> 00:18:40,361
Don't listen to her,

418
00:18:40,363 --> 00:18:41,631
she's been in a box
for, like, 25 years.

419
00:18:42,601 --> 00:18:44,035
Yeah, back when his haircut

420
00:18:44,037 --> 00:18:46,875
was fashionable.

421
00:18:48,279 --> 00:18:49,546
That's enough, put her away.

422
00:18:49,548 --> 00:18:51,149
Oh, big daddy,

423
00:18:51,151 --> 00:18:52,452
I don't think so.

424
00:18:52,454 --> 00:18:55,258
You marry Miss Bernie,
you marry me.

425
00:18:56,462 --> 00:18:59,734
We all family now.

426
00:19:00,570 --> 00:19:02,272
All right,
you're freaking me out.

427
00:19:02,274 --> 00:19:03,808
Don't be that way.

428
00:19:03,810 --> 00:19:05,244
If you don't mind
a few splinters,

429
00:19:05,356 --> 00:19:07,774
we can have us a ménage? trois.

430
00:19:07,776 --> 00:19:09,114
Ooh!

431
00:19:15,620 --> 00:19:17,843
I'm doing it.

432
00:19:17,873 --> 00:19:19,796
I'm doing it.

433
00:19:19,798 --> 00:19:24,238
I'm tall and
I'm doing it!

434
00:19:26,893 --> 00:19:28,494
Ah, man.

435
00:19:30,165 --> 00:19:36,972
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man