1
00:00:06,420 --> 00:00:12,494
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today

2
00:00:16,904 --> 00:00:18,772
Hey, man.
My name is Jeff.

3
00:00:18,772 --> 00:00:20,708
I'm trying to lock down
my schedule

4
00:00:20,708 --> 00:00:22,342
before the deadline.

5
00:00:22,342 --> 00:00:23,711
I heard this class
was a cakewalk.

6
00:00:23,711 --> 00:00:25,145
Are you passing it?

7
00:00:25,145 --> 00:00:28,215
Do you like Dane Cook?
Yeah, he's awesome.

8
00:00:28,215 --> 00:00:30,584
So far so good.

9
00:00:30,584 --> 00:00:34,054
Death, so called,

10
00:00:34,054 --> 00:00:38,191
Is a thing
That makes men weep,

11
00:00:38,191 --> 00:00:44,097
And yet a third of life
Is spent in sleep.

12
00:00:44,097 --> 00:00:47,568
Open your text books
to page 37.

13
00:00:50,437 --> 00:00:53,674
Now, close them
and throw them away.

14
00:00:55,643 --> 00:00:58,478
Throw it away.
Ha-ha-ha!

15
00:00:58,478 --> 00:01:00,147
Throw it away.

16
00:01:00,147 --> 00:01:02,850
For those who are new,
the motto of this class,

17
00:01:02,850 --> 00:01:08,155
carpe diem, seize the day,
no tests, no papers.

18
00:01:08,155 --> 00:01:09,356
You want an A?

19
00:01:09,356 --> 00:01:14,494
Live in the moment.

20
00:01:16,463 --> 00:01:17,865
Jackpot.

21
00:01:17,865 --> 00:01:20,100
Take off your shoes.
Take off your shoes.

22
00:01:20,100 --> 00:01:22,035
Take your shoes off,
throw them away.

23
00:01:22,035 --> 00:01:24,772
Throw them over there.
Today we learn to walk.

24
00:01:24,772 --> 00:01:26,674
Get up and walk out the door.

25
00:01:26,674 --> 00:01:28,576
This day could be your last.

26
00:01:28,576 --> 00:01:31,679
You could die in your sleep.
You could get hit by a bus.

27
00:01:31,679 --> 00:01:33,246
That mole is raised
and dark,

28
00:01:33,246 --> 00:01:34,447
it's not a good combo.

29
00:01:34,447 --> 00:01:36,449
You are new.
Yes, I'm new.

30
00:01:36,449 --> 00:01:37,818
But I'll be old too soon.

31
00:01:37,818 --> 00:01:40,487
Carpe diem, sir,
carpe diem.

32
00:01:40,487 --> 00:01:43,123
Ha-ha-ha! I like it!

33
00:01:43,123 --> 00:01:44,424
Voice command.

34
00:01:46,594 --> 00:01:47,961
Voice command.

35
00:01:47,961 --> 00:01:49,863
Voice command.

36
00:01:49,863 --> 00:01:51,832
Voice command.

37
00:01:51,832 --> 00:01:54,534
Voice command.

38
00:01:57,771 --> 00:02:00,608
Voice comm—

39
00:02:00,608 --> 00:02:02,676
Would you please use
the buttons?

40
00:02:03,644 --> 00:02:05,713
Okay, grandpa.

41
00:02:05,713 --> 00:02:08,148
Achoo!

42
00:02:08,148 --> 00:02:09,482
Oh. God bless you, dear.

43
00:02:11,051 --> 00:02:13,486
What's so funny?
You guys, I found it.

44
00:02:13,486 --> 00:02:14,888
The ultimate blow-off class.

45
00:02:14,888 --> 00:02:16,323
Professor Whitman,

46
00:02:16,323 --> 00:02:18,692
he thinks
he's in Dead Poets Society.

47
00:02:18,692 --> 00:02:20,761
There's no tests,
there's no work,

48
00:02:20,761 --> 00:02:23,230
it's just day seizing.

49
00:02:23,230 --> 00:02:24,798
The deadline to enroll
is tomorrow.

50
00:02:24,798 --> 00:02:26,399
I suggest you all do it.

51
00:02:26,399 --> 00:02:29,102
Well, some of us are here
to actually learn things.

52
00:02:29,102 --> 00:02:31,639
I'm in.
Me too, it sounds educational.

53
00:02:31,639 --> 00:02:34,507
I love Robin Williams.
Abed?

54
00:02:34,507 --> 00:02:36,744
Not a fan. In every movie,
there's an authority figure

55
00:02:36,744 --> 00:02:38,345
that gets mad at him
for making people laugh.

56
00:02:38,345 --> 00:02:40,080
No, are you going
to take the class?

57
00:02:40,080 --> 00:02:42,015
Oh, can't. My dad will
only pay for classes

58
00:02:42,015 --> 00:02:43,884
that will help me run
the family restaurant.

59
00:02:43,884 --> 00:02:45,318
It's been struggling
since 2001.

60
00:02:45,318 --> 00:02:47,587
9/11 was pretty much the 9/11
of the falafel business.

61
00:02:47,587 --> 00:02:50,824
So your dad has your whole
life planned out for you?

62
00:02:50,824 --> 00:02:52,893
Are you even
interested in falafel?

63
00:02:52,893 --> 00:02:54,261
I'm interested
in making movies.

64
00:02:54,261 --> 00:02:56,463
But my Dad says all media's
Western propaganda

65
00:02:56,463 --> 00:02:57,965
that negatively
stereotypes Arabs.

66
00:02:57,965 --> 00:03:00,100
He should see Aladdin,
Jafar was a badass.

67
00:03:00,100 --> 00:03:02,936
- Yes, he was.
- He was.

68
00:03:02,936 --> 00:03:05,405
Abed, how much
does a film class cost?

69
00:03:05,405 --> 00:03:07,074
Seventy dollars.

70
00:03:09,009 --> 00:03:11,511
Britta?
Jeff?

71
00:03:11,511 --> 00:03:12,913
Britta.

72
00:03:12,913 --> 00:03:15,148
Isn't Abed's dad
a hardcore Muslim?

73
00:03:15,148 --> 00:03:17,017
They're not as understanding
as Christians.

74
00:03:17,017 --> 00:03:18,986
You could get your head cut off
with a salami sword.

75
00:03:18,986 --> 00:03:20,821
Shirley, that's
the most racist thing

76
00:03:20,821 --> 00:03:22,155
I've ever heard.
Is that racist?

77
00:03:22,155 --> 00:03:24,091
Pierce will beat
that in one minute.

78
00:03:28,228 --> 00:03:29,897
This is really nice of you.

79
00:03:29,897 --> 00:03:32,399
The memo says,
"For dreams."

80
00:03:32,399 --> 00:03:33,667
Aw.

81
00:03:33,667 --> 00:03:35,602
You guys, are we going
to study Spanish,

82
00:03:35,602 --> 00:03:37,971
or keep getting involved
in each other's personal lives?

83
00:03:37,971 --> 00:03:39,306
Achoo!

84
00:03:39,306 --> 00:03:41,008
Hey, Troy sneezes
like a girl.

85
00:03:41,008 --> 00:03:42,743
How about I pound you
like a boy?

86
00:03:42,743 --> 00:03:44,377
That didn't come out right.

87
00:03:44,377 --> 00:03:47,014
Why don't you leave him alone
with his cute baby sneezes.

88
00:03:47,014 --> 00:03:49,783
You're not my mother.
She's not?

89
00:03:49,783 --> 00:03:51,719
Twenty-nine seconds.

90
00:04:20,714 --> 00:04:23,050
What's your name?
Shirley Bennett.

91
00:04:23,050 --> 00:04:24,952
Shirley, you get an A...
Oh.

92
00:04:24,952 --> 00:04:27,955
if you can tell me
why you are here at Greendale.

93
00:04:29,389 --> 00:04:31,124
What did I tell you?

94
00:04:31,124 --> 00:04:34,561
- Okay, but, uh, never again.
- Shirley?

95
00:04:34,561 --> 00:04:37,564
To get a degree in business
so I can sell my baked goods

96
00:04:37,564 --> 00:04:39,466
and whatnot on the Internet.

97
00:04:39,466 --> 00:04:41,701
Why are you here?

98
00:04:41,701 --> 00:04:43,336
To get a degree in business

99
00:04:43,336 --> 00:04:45,605
so I can sell my baked goods
and whatnot on the Internet.

100
00:04:45,605 --> 00:04:47,240
Why are you here?

101
00:04:48,375 --> 00:04:50,577
Because I wasted 15 years
of my life

102
00:04:50,577 --> 00:04:52,512
on a man who left me
with nothing but stretch marks

103
00:04:52,512 --> 00:04:54,281
and a foggy memory
of two bland orgasms.

104
00:04:54,281 --> 00:04:56,784
And now it's time to get
what's mine.

105
00:04:56,784 --> 00:04:58,852
Day seized.

106
00:05:01,121 --> 00:05:03,390
Only when we stop stopping
our lives

107
00:05:03,390 --> 00:05:06,526
can we begin
to start starting them.

108
00:05:06,526 --> 00:05:08,661
Ms. Edison here,
for example,

109
00:05:08,661 --> 00:05:10,931
would rather write about
what happens to other people

110
00:05:10,931 --> 00:05:13,266
than live
what is happening to her.

111
00:05:13,266 --> 00:05:15,368
I thought
there might be a quiz.

112
00:05:15,368 --> 00:05:16,904
Well, here's
a quiz for you.

113
00:05:16,904 --> 00:05:20,040
Why did the pretty
young girl die alone,

114
00:05:20,040 --> 00:05:22,175
surrounded
by sweater-wearing cats

115
00:05:22,175 --> 00:05:25,645
who were trained
to use human toilets?

116
00:05:25,645 --> 00:05:27,414
Get up on your desk.

117
00:05:29,149 --> 00:05:31,351
Come on, stand on your desk.

118
00:05:31,351 --> 00:05:33,420
Up on your desk.

119
00:05:33,420 --> 00:05:35,889
She made it. Ha-ha!

120
00:05:35,889 --> 00:05:37,624
Everyone,
stand on your desks.

121
00:05:37,624 --> 00:05:39,226
Up, up, up. Come on.

122
00:05:39,226 --> 00:05:42,529
Rise, rise,
rise above the programming.

123
00:05:42,529 --> 00:05:45,698
All your lives you were told,
"don't stand on your desk."

124
00:05:45,698 --> 00:05:46,900
Well, why not?

125
00:05:48,101 --> 00:05:50,370
Oh, what happened? My—

126
00:05:50,370 --> 00:05:54,441
She's okay, go to the nurse,
seize the day.

127
00:05:54,441 --> 00:05:58,011
You know, I was really moved
by your honesty earlier.

128
00:05:58,011 --> 00:05:59,880
Particularly, the part
about, uh,

129
00:05:59,880 --> 00:06:02,149
your husband not being—
Oh!

130
00:06:02,149 --> 00:06:04,317
Your homework. Ah.

131
00:06:05,552 --> 00:06:07,287
I want you to swim in a lake

132
00:06:07,287 --> 00:06:09,189
and tell 10 people
that you love them.

133
00:06:10,523 --> 00:06:13,894
Mr. Winger,
may I have a word, please?

134
00:06:13,894 --> 00:06:15,095
Are you okay?

135
00:06:15,095 --> 00:06:16,830
Oh. Oh, maybe,
I'm not.

136
00:06:18,198 --> 00:06:20,600
Hi, Mr. Winger,
I like to think that every life

137
00:06:20,600 --> 00:06:23,003
that passes through
this class is changed.

138
00:06:23,003 --> 00:06:25,405
But there's always
one cocky opportunist

139
00:06:25,405 --> 00:06:27,975
who's just here to coast
and grab an easy A.

140
00:06:27,975 --> 00:06:30,043
Oh, yeah.

141
00:06:30,043 --> 00:06:32,445
His name is Pierce,
I can talk to him for you.

142
00:06:32,445 --> 00:06:34,481
It's actually you,
Mr. Winger.

143
00:06:34,481 --> 00:06:37,050
You have no intention
of seizing the day.

144
00:06:37,050 --> 00:06:38,886
What? Listen, I—

145
00:06:38,886 --> 00:06:41,521
I have never lived
until I met you.

146
00:06:41,521 --> 00:06:42,722
I— I love you.

147
00:06:42,722 --> 00:06:45,092
There's one down, nine to go.

148
00:06:45,092 --> 00:06:46,927
Not that I need the grade
or even want it.

149
00:06:46,927 --> 00:06:49,129
Glad to hear it,
because if you don't

150
00:06:49,129 --> 00:06:52,165
genuinely seize the day
before the end of the week,

151
00:06:52,165 --> 00:06:54,667
then you will be seizing an F
for the semester.

152
00:06:57,437 --> 00:07:01,008
This is no way
to teach accounting.

153
00:07:01,008 --> 00:07:02,976
I have to plan in advance

154
00:07:02,976 --> 00:07:04,511
how to prove that
I live in the moment.

155
00:07:04,511 --> 00:07:07,180
I'd rather take
an actual class,

156
00:07:07,180 --> 00:07:08,781
but now, it's too late
to drop or add.

157
00:07:08,781 --> 00:07:11,284
It is not fair how hard it is
for you to cheat here.

158
00:07:13,220 --> 00:07:15,055
Ah! Hey, how's it going?

159
00:07:15,055 --> 00:07:16,489
How's your film class, buddy?

160
00:07:16,489 --> 00:07:18,625
It's cool. Our first assignment
is a documentary.

161
00:07:18,625 --> 00:07:20,460
They're like real movies
but with ugly people.

162
00:07:20,460 --> 00:07:22,495
I'm learning a lot.
That is so wonderful.

163
00:07:22,495 --> 00:07:24,131
Some people don't like
getting involved

164
00:07:24,131 --> 00:07:25,532
in others' lives.
I think it's great.

165
00:07:25,532 --> 00:07:27,134
Hey, if you're making
a documentary

166
00:07:27,134 --> 00:07:28,969
about Britta
patting herself on the back,

167
00:07:28,969 --> 00:07:30,470
you're gonna need
a backup battery.

168
00:07:30,470 --> 00:07:32,839
I'm doing a movie about my dad.
That is brilliant.

169
00:07:32,839 --> 00:07:35,342
How did he react to you
signing up for the film class?

170
00:07:35,342 --> 00:07:37,177
That part hasn't happened yet.
Here he comes.

171
00:07:37,177 --> 00:07:40,580
Hey, you want to get involved
in my family's business?

172
00:07:40,580 --> 00:07:42,782
Holy war.

173
00:07:42,782 --> 00:07:44,517
Where do I find Mr. Britta?

174
00:07:44,517 --> 00:07:46,353
I'm Mr. Britta.

175
00:07:46,353 --> 00:07:49,256
That's right,
I'm a woman with rights.

176
00:07:49,256 --> 00:07:51,424
And you can see my whole face.

177
00:07:51,424 --> 00:07:55,228
Oh, I get it, because
I'm Arab I must hate women.

178
00:07:55,228 --> 00:07:57,564
Let me tell you something.
I love women.

179
00:07:57,564 --> 00:08:00,367
But I'm getting a major B-word
vibe from you.

180
00:08:00,367 --> 00:08:03,736
Wow, I can't believe I missed
out on getting involved in this.

181
00:08:03,736 --> 00:08:06,406
You go host American Idol, and
you stop messing with my son.

182
00:08:06,406 --> 00:08:10,210
He is a special boy.
I raise him. You don't.

183
00:08:10,210 --> 00:08:12,379
Raising him means
letting him follow dreams.

184
00:08:12,379 --> 00:08:14,281
Dreams are for sleeping.
You don't know that.

185
00:08:14,281 --> 00:08:16,349
It's clinically proven.
So is polio.

186
00:08:16,349 --> 00:08:17,817
You lost me.

187
00:08:17,817 --> 00:08:20,120
Abed wants to study film.

188
00:08:22,155 --> 00:08:24,257
What's he saying?
He says we're leaving.

189
00:08:24,257 --> 00:08:26,126
Tell him you wanna stay
and study film.

190
00:08:26,126 --> 00:08:27,460
I don't think
I'm really in the scene.

191
00:08:27,460 --> 00:08:29,762
See? It's hard to talk
to him before.

192
00:08:29,762 --> 00:08:31,598
Now we have this between us.

193
00:08:31,598 --> 00:08:32,865
Let's go!
Hey. Hey.

194
00:08:32,865 --> 00:08:34,567
Don't touch me.

195
00:08:34,567 --> 00:08:36,636
You— You don't touch me.
Shut up. Stop.

196
00:08:36,636 --> 00:08:39,872
Sir, you have a right
to your faith

197
00:08:39,872 --> 00:08:41,208
and your family's privacy

198
00:08:41,208 --> 00:08:44,511
but Abed is an adult
and a U.S. citizen.

199
00:08:44,511 --> 00:08:46,179
Right?
Yeah.

200
00:08:46,179 --> 00:08:48,715
And he has the right to stay.

201
00:08:48,715 --> 00:08:50,283
Fine.

202
00:08:50,283 --> 00:08:53,453
You want to raise him?
You raise him, I'm out.

203
00:08:53,453 --> 00:08:56,990
Wait, what?
I had a father like you.

204
00:08:56,990 --> 00:08:59,692
And the day
I finally cut myself loose

205
00:08:59,692 --> 00:09:04,497
is the day
I finally started being happy.

206
00:09:04,497 --> 00:09:06,233
That went well.

207
00:09:06,233 --> 00:09:07,800
I have to make some adjustments
to my film.

208
00:09:07,800 --> 00:09:10,103
Jeff, I think you should play
the role of my father.

209
00:09:10,103 --> 00:09:11,838
I don't want to be your father.

210
00:09:11,838 --> 00:09:13,740
It's perfect.
You already know your lines.

211
00:09:22,049 --> 00:09:25,252
Why are you dressed
like an '80s rapist?

212
00:09:25,252 --> 00:09:27,254
Professor Whitman
comes by here every morning

213
00:09:27,254 --> 00:09:30,890
and I need him to see me
celebrating life.

214
00:09:30,890 --> 00:09:32,492
What's all that?

215
00:09:32,492 --> 00:09:35,562
I am calculating Abed's
expenses for this semester.

216
00:09:35,562 --> 00:09:38,165
There's books, there's meals,
he's renting that camera.

217
00:09:38,165 --> 00:09:40,133
He needs
a little spending money.

218
00:09:40,133 --> 00:09:42,035
Um, all money
is spending money.

219
00:09:42,035 --> 00:09:45,205
Oh, Britta, it's amazing
what you're doing for Abed.

220
00:09:45,205 --> 00:09:46,639
I mean, a lot of people
talk a good game.

221
00:09:46,639 --> 00:09:50,610
But you, you follow through.
I love you.

222
00:09:50,610 --> 00:09:52,445
Shirley, thank you.

223
00:09:52,445 --> 00:09:54,781
Bet that doesn't happen
to you a lot.

224
00:09:54,781 --> 00:09:57,350
It happened yesterday. Shirley's
just doing her homework.

225
00:09:57,350 --> 00:09:59,919
Hillary, thank you
for getting people coffee.

226
00:09:59,919 --> 00:10:01,388
I love you.

227
00:10:04,091 --> 00:10:06,293
Abed, how's it
going, buddy?

228
00:10:06,293 --> 00:10:07,660
Good, my film
is coming together.

229
00:10:07,660 --> 00:10:09,296
Cool tie, Jeff.
Are you wearing that

230
00:10:09,296 --> 00:10:10,830
because you're playing
the role of my dad,

231
00:10:10,830 --> 00:10:12,865
or is it really Christmas?
Definitely Christmas.

232
00:10:12,865 --> 00:10:15,268
- Is that a new camera?
- Yeah, it's more expensive

233
00:10:15,268 --> 00:10:17,270
but it lets me adjust
really specific settings

234
00:10:17,270 --> 00:10:19,272
that most people don't notice
or think about.

235
00:10:19,272 --> 00:10:21,341
Hi, I would like a latte,

236
00:10:21,341 --> 00:10:23,143
and Jeff,
let me get you something.

237
00:10:23,143 --> 00:10:24,544
I'm okay.
Oh, come on, I got you.

238
00:10:24,544 --> 00:10:26,246
No, really,
I don't need anything—

239
00:10:26,246 --> 00:10:27,814
You're insulting me.
Look at all this cash.

240
00:10:27,814 --> 00:10:31,318
Okay. I will get a small,
black coffee.

241
00:10:31,318 --> 00:10:35,355
Boo. An ordinary coffee
for an ordinary life.

242
00:10:35,355 --> 00:10:38,425
Good morning,
Professor Whitman.

243
00:10:38,425 --> 00:10:42,295
Sorry, Mr. Winger,
these won't cut it.

244
00:10:42,295 --> 00:10:45,198
- Shazbat.
- I shall have—

245
00:10:48,835 --> 00:10:51,037
A birthday cake.

246
00:10:59,512 --> 00:11:02,482
I've seen men
in your situation, Troy.

247
00:11:02,482 --> 00:11:05,051
No, those are
both for me.

248
00:11:05,051 --> 00:11:06,586
You were on top
of the world before

249
00:11:06,586 --> 00:11:08,321
and now, no one
gives a rat's ass.

250
00:11:08,321 --> 00:11:10,457
I can help you
with your image.

251
00:11:10,457 --> 00:11:12,159
First, I'd lose the jacket,

252
00:11:12,159 --> 00:11:13,560
you look like
a high school bitch.

253
00:11:13,560 --> 00:11:15,895
But more importantly,
it's your sneeze.

254
00:11:15,895 --> 00:11:17,130
When I was a CEO,

255
00:11:17,130 --> 00:11:20,133
I had an array
of masculine sneezes

256
00:11:20,133 --> 00:11:22,402
that asserted dominance.

257
00:11:22,402 --> 00:11:23,670
You know, like the explosive

258
00:11:23,670 --> 00:11:27,006
shock-the-room-
into-silence sneeze.

259
00:11:31,144 --> 00:11:33,746
Or, they draw them in sneeze,
you know.

260
00:11:36,783 --> 00:11:38,418
You know,
maybe I wouldn't sneeze,

261
00:11:38,418 --> 00:11:40,920
because I'm in control.

262
00:11:40,920 --> 00:11:43,956
You can even use a sneeze
to drive home a point.

263
00:11:43,956 --> 00:11:46,826
Like, I think the Cubs
are gonna win it all this year.

264
00:11:50,763 --> 00:11:52,131
What do you think?

265
00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:55,268
Tell me more.

266
00:12:04,711 --> 00:12:07,180
It's show time.

267
00:12:09,549 --> 00:12:11,418
Hey, everybody, good morning.

268
00:12:11,418 --> 00:12:14,221
Good morning, sir.
Good morning, Greendale.

269
00:12:14,221 --> 00:12:16,189
Hi, good morning.

270
00:12:16,189 --> 00:12:18,491
Watch the kite. Uh-oh.

271
00:12:18,491 --> 00:12:21,328
Mind if I get a chance? Oh!

272
00:12:26,599 --> 00:12:28,735
Thanks, you guys,
bring it in here. Nice.

273
00:12:28,735 --> 00:12:31,804
Thank you so much, you guys,
that was really fun.

274
00:12:33,540 --> 00:12:36,343
Sloppy and considering the age
of these girls,

275
00:12:36,343 --> 00:12:37,910
unwittingly creepy.

276
00:12:37,910 --> 00:12:39,612
Damn it.

277
00:12:41,113 --> 00:12:42,582
Beat it. Professor.

278
00:12:42,582 --> 00:12:44,050
Will you look
at the amount of work

279
00:12:44,050 --> 00:12:46,152
that I'm putting into this?
I mean, throw me a bone.

280
00:12:46,152 --> 00:12:49,522
Had I not already cried
at the sunrise this morning,

281
00:12:49,522 --> 00:12:51,658
I would be weeping
right now.

282
00:12:51,658 --> 00:12:55,262
What does that mean?
What do you mean, Jeff?

283
00:12:55,262 --> 00:12:56,996
What does your life mean?

284
00:12:56,996 --> 00:12:58,765
How long does it take you
in the morning

285
00:12:58,765 --> 00:13:00,467
to make it look like
you have bed-head?

286
00:13:00,467 --> 00:13:02,935
How many sweatpants-
sports jacket combos

287
00:13:02,935 --> 00:13:05,104
did you try before you found
the one that said,

288
00:13:05,104 --> 00:13:06,673
"I don't care?"

289
00:13:06,673 --> 00:13:09,642
Seize the day, Jeff.
For real.

290
00:13:09,642 --> 00:13:11,611
Go running naked
in a hail storm.

291
00:13:11,611 --> 00:13:12,945
Kiss a girl
in the middle of the day.

292
00:13:12,945 --> 00:13:15,548
Fly a kite,
but do it for yourself.

293
00:13:15,548 --> 00:13:18,785
Or you won't just fail
my class,

294
00:13:18,785 --> 00:13:20,219
you'll fail life.

295
00:13:27,193 --> 00:13:28,595
Thank you.

296
00:13:30,062 --> 00:13:31,364
That guy's really
got your number.

297
00:13:31,364 --> 00:13:32,665
Drop the flower.

298
00:13:32,665 --> 00:13:34,601
I need to talk to you
about Abed.

299
00:13:34,601 --> 00:13:37,604
I went by his film class today,
he wasn't there, he's cutting.

300
00:13:37,604 --> 00:13:39,939
I wanna know why
he would do something like that.

301
00:13:39,939 --> 00:13:41,474
Ask him.

302
00:13:41,474 --> 00:13:43,075
Every time I try
to ask him about it,

303
00:13:43,075 --> 00:13:44,611
he just keeps filming me

304
00:13:44,611 --> 00:13:47,079
and telling me that I'm playing
the role of his mother.

305
00:13:47,079 --> 00:13:49,616
Abed is not normal.

306
00:13:49,616 --> 00:13:51,150
That's what you bought

307
00:13:51,150 --> 00:13:53,753
when you intentionally
tangled yourself in his life.

308
00:13:55,054 --> 00:13:58,024
Look, will you just—
Will you please talk to him?

309
00:13:58,024 --> 00:13:59,492
I've got problems of my own.

310
00:13:59,492 --> 00:14:01,260
I'm out here trying
to seize a day.

311
00:14:04,931 --> 00:14:06,265
What in the hell?

312
00:14:08,535 --> 00:14:10,637
Is he gonna kill us?

313
00:14:13,573 --> 00:14:16,242
Thanks for the pizza, Abed,
I was starving.

314
00:14:16,242 --> 00:14:18,311
Yeah, it's nice,
like a picnic.

315
00:14:18,311 --> 00:14:19,712
Or a family dinner.

316
00:14:19,712 --> 00:14:21,147
It's a study group
and a pizza,

317
00:14:21,147 --> 00:14:23,616
let's not get
carried away.

318
00:14:29,121 --> 00:14:31,591
So, Abed.

319
00:14:31,591 --> 00:14:33,693
How's film class?
Good.

320
00:14:34,661 --> 00:14:36,162
Yeah. Did you
go to class today?

321
00:14:36,162 --> 00:14:37,497
Not really.
Not really.

322
00:14:37,497 --> 00:14:38,998
Well, Britta's paying
for those classes,

323
00:14:38,998 --> 00:14:40,533
don't you think
maybe you should go?

324
00:14:40,533 --> 00:14:43,370
I was shooting my movie.
Your movie is for class.

325
00:14:43,370 --> 00:14:46,305
My movie's more important.
La-la-la.

326
00:14:46,305 --> 00:14:49,442
Someone order seven lattes?
I got that.

327
00:14:49,442 --> 00:14:52,379
No, you don't got it.
I got it, Abed.

328
00:14:52,379 --> 00:14:55,582
I got everything.
What is wrong with you?

329
00:14:55,582 --> 00:14:57,283
All I want to do
is take care of you.

330
00:14:57,283 --> 00:15:00,420
I know you're not stupid,
are you doing this on purpose?

331
00:15:03,390 --> 00:15:04,957
Why won't you answer me?

332
00:15:04,957 --> 00:15:06,893
This is the scene
where you leave.

333
00:15:06,893 --> 00:15:08,995
You better believe it.

334
00:15:08,995 --> 00:15:10,430
Britta.

335
00:15:14,401 --> 00:15:16,335
What do you think, Dad?

336
00:15:16,335 --> 00:15:19,806
I think you are really weird,
Abed.

337
00:15:19,806 --> 00:15:21,908
And I think
the wrong person just left.

338
00:15:27,113 --> 00:15:28,748
Perfect. That's a wrap.

339
00:15:32,452 --> 00:15:33,986
That guy was your dad?

340
00:15:38,324 --> 00:15:39,992
Hey.
Hey.

341
00:15:39,992 --> 00:15:42,429
You don't really have tickets
for Ravi Shankar, do you?

342
00:15:42,429 --> 00:15:43,796
I lied to get you here

343
00:15:43,796 --> 00:15:45,665
because it's time
to communicate.

344
00:15:45,665 --> 00:15:48,401
Communicate?
Have you met Abed?

345
00:15:48,401 --> 00:15:50,169
It's not the two of you
that need to talk.

346
00:15:50,169 --> 00:15:51,571
Hey, wait a minute.

347
00:15:51,571 --> 00:15:53,039
Where's Weezer?
They're coming.

348
00:15:53,039 --> 00:15:55,808
Now, the only reason
why this whole mess got started

349
00:15:55,808 --> 00:15:58,911
is because both of you
wanted the best for Abed.

350
00:15:58,911 --> 00:16:02,181
And I think the lesson
we can all take away from this

351
00:16:02,181 --> 00:16:04,417
is that everyone
should always do

352
00:16:04,417 --> 00:16:05,652
whatever they want,

353
00:16:05,652 --> 00:16:07,954
and leave each other
out of it.

354
00:16:09,155 --> 00:16:12,391
Is that your take?
Let me give you mine.

355
00:16:12,391 --> 00:16:14,026
You and your
pillow-lipped girlfriend

356
00:16:14,026 --> 00:16:15,394
got all up in my stuff

357
00:16:15,394 --> 00:16:16,829
because you wanted
to be cowboys,

358
00:16:16,829 --> 00:16:18,698
and then you turned chicken
when you found out

359
00:16:18,698 --> 00:16:21,668
it would take more than speeches
and guided missiles.

360
00:16:21,668 --> 00:16:24,103
Interesting. I hadn't seen
the Iraq metaphor.

361
00:16:24,103 --> 00:16:27,339
What metaphor? I'm talking
about your speeches

362
00:16:27,339 --> 00:16:28,741
and her guided—
Got it.

363
00:16:28,741 --> 00:16:31,678
The point is, is that Britta
is sorry, right?

364
00:16:31,678 --> 00:16:33,012
Wrong.
Crap.

365
00:16:33,012 --> 00:16:34,947
Abed may not be
a great filmmaker

366
00:16:34,947 --> 00:16:37,049
but that doesn't mean
that he wants to make falafel.

367
00:16:37,049 --> 00:16:39,118
You need to let him
make his own decisions.

368
00:16:39,118 --> 00:16:41,721
Make his own decisions?
Have you met Abed?

369
00:16:41,721 --> 00:16:43,355
You know who he is?
You have no—

370
00:16:43,355 --> 00:16:46,493
Guys.
I'm finished.

371
00:16:48,294 --> 00:16:50,162
Britta, Jeff, Dad.

372
00:16:55,001 --> 00:16:57,069
Dad.

373
00:17:13,452 --> 00:17:17,223
How's it going, buddy?
I don't want to be your father.

374
00:17:21,528 --> 00:17:23,262
I think you are weird, Abed.

375
00:17:23,262 --> 00:17:25,732
Hey, look. I need to talk
to you about Abed.

376
00:17:25,732 --> 00:17:27,399
He's not normal.

377
00:17:30,503 --> 00:17:31,904
What is wrong with you?

378
00:17:31,904 --> 00:17:33,740
All I want to do
is take care of you.

379
00:17:35,307 --> 00:17:37,043
Why will you not answer me?

380
00:17:45,552 --> 00:17:47,920
What do you think, Dad?

381
00:17:47,920 --> 00:17:50,256
I think you are weird, Abed.

382
00:17:50,256 --> 00:17:53,192
And I think
the wrong person just left.

383
00:17:59,766 --> 00:18:01,568
It's not exactly Citizen Kane.

384
00:18:27,026 --> 00:18:29,028
I feel a little out
of the loop here.

385
00:18:29,028 --> 00:18:32,098
That feeling is called
the joy of freedom.

386
00:18:37,369 --> 00:18:38,871
My son is hard to understand.

387
00:18:40,006 --> 00:18:43,876
If making movies help him
be understood,

388
00:18:44,744 --> 00:18:46,178
then I pay for the class.

389
00:18:54,787 --> 00:18:56,288
I made all this happen.

390
00:18:56,288 --> 00:18:58,925
With falafel as a fallback.

391
00:19:03,429 --> 00:19:04,864
Abed.
Yeah?

392
00:19:04,864 --> 00:19:07,834
Did you do all of that to me
on purpose?

393
00:19:09,235 --> 00:19:12,204
That's not a very nice way
to treat your friends.

394
00:19:12,204 --> 00:19:13,472
Well, Britta,

395
00:19:13,472 --> 00:19:15,441
it isn't called
friend business,

396
00:19:15,441 --> 00:19:17,777
it's called show business.

397
00:19:17,777 --> 00:19:21,648
He's smoking.
Honey, let him leave the nest.

398
00:19:24,851 --> 00:19:27,153
Get your hand off
of my knee.

399
00:19:34,694 --> 00:19:35,962
God— God bless you.

400
00:19:35,962 --> 00:19:39,365
God bless you.
Thank you.

401
00:19:39,365 --> 00:19:41,734
For someone who doesn't like
getting involved,

402
00:19:41,734 --> 00:19:44,837
well, I owe you.

403
00:19:44,837 --> 00:19:46,773
You owe me?

404
00:19:46,773 --> 00:19:49,541
That can not be
comfortable for you.

405
00:19:49,541 --> 00:19:52,511
Hey, um—

406
00:19:52,511 --> 00:19:54,747
You should kiss me right now.

407
00:20:05,658 --> 00:20:07,827
Day seized!

408
00:20:07,827 --> 00:20:09,929
We're even.

409
00:20:09,929 --> 00:20:11,463
A plus, Winger.

410
00:20:11,463 --> 00:20:15,267
I know a life-changing kiss
when I see one. Wowee!

411
00:20:18,537 --> 00:20:20,372
Yeah.

412
00:20:20,372 --> 00:20:21,908
Fooled you.

413
00:20:37,890 --> 00:20:39,759
Am I krumping?
No.

414
00:20:39,759 --> 00:20:41,761
Am I krumping?
No.

415
00:20:41,761 --> 00:20:45,031
Am I krumping now?
No.

416
00:20:46,165 --> 00:20:48,234
This is krumping.

417
00:21:02,481 --> 00:21:03,682
We— We're krumping.

418
00:21:03,682 --> 00:21:05,852
No, you're not.

419
00:21:07,686 --> 00:21:09,221
Hit it!

420
00:21:12,725 --> 00:21:22,725
Please rate this subtitle at www.osdb.link/6y5af
Help other users to choose the best subtitles