1 00:00:05,709 --> 00:00:07,377 Hey, Buzby, 2 00:00:05,709 --> 00:00:07,377 how are you today? 3 00:00:07,377 --> 00:00:08,545 Not so great, Bumbleton. 4 00:00:08,545 --> 00:00:10,172 I have a ton of pollen 5 00:00:08,545 --> 00:00:10,172 to collect, 6 00:00:10,172 --> 00:00:11,631 but I'm really tired. 7 00:00:11,631 --> 00:00:14,301 Flying a little low? 8 00:00:11,631 --> 00:00:14,301 Maybe you should get high. 9 00:00:14,301 --> 00:00:16,845 Who's this? 10 00:00:14,301 --> 00:00:16,845 This is Drugs. 11 00:00:16,845 --> 00:00:18,680 Aren't Drugs bad? 12 00:00:16,845 --> 00:00:18,680 No way. 13 00:00:18,680 --> 00:00:21,892 Drugs are like special honey. 14 00:00:18,680 --> 00:00:21,892 They give you a buzzzz. 15 00:00:21,892 --> 00:00:23,434 Don't call me honey, honey. 16 00:00:23,434 --> 00:00:25,687 Pierce, 17 00:00:23,434 --> 00:00:25,687 Drugs doesn't say that. 18 00:00:25,687 --> 00:00:28,023 You know, I don't say anything, 19 00:00:25,687 --> 00:00:28,023 by the way. 20 00:00:28,023 --> 00:00:30,734 I mean, I thought this show 21 00:00:28,023 --> 00:00:30,734 was about drug awareness. 22 00:00:30,734 --> 00:00:33,486 Who's gonna be aware of 23 00:00:30,734 --> 00:00:33,486 a character that has no lines? 24 00:00:33,486 --> 00:00:36,573 Also, I noticed on page 15 25 00:00:33,486 --> 00:00:36,573 I get flushed down the toilet. 26 00:00:36,573 --> 00:00:38,283 Consider yourself lucky. 27 00:00:38,283 --> 00:00:40,410 Annie, question. 28 00:00:38,283 --> 00:00:40,410 Is Pierce marijuana, 29 00:00:40,410 --> 00:00:42,037 and does marijuana help 30 00:00:40,410 --> 00:00:42,037 people work faster? 31 00:00:42,037 --> 00:00:43,580 I thought it made them 32 00:00:42,037 --> 00:00:43,580 custom-paint their vans 33 00:00:43,580 --> 00:00:45,207 and solve mysteries. 34 00:00:45,207 --> 00:00:46,917 Are you sure that my costume 35 00:00:45,207 --> 00:00:46,917 is on backwards? 36 00:00:46,917 --> 00:00:49,920 I felt more confident before. 37 00:00:46,917 --> 00:00:49,920 I have a question. 38 00:00:49,920 --> 00:00:52,381 I don't think my character 39 00:00:49,920 --> 00:00:52,381 would say "tripping balls." 40 00:00:52,381 --> 00:00:54,216 That's not a question. 41 00:00:52,381 --> 00:00:54,216 I don't think my character 42 00:00:54,216 --> 00:00:55,967 would say 43 00:00:54,216 --> 00:00:55,967 "tripping balls," okay? 44 00:00:55,967 --> 00:00:58,636 Let's remember 45 00:00:55,967 --> 00:00:58,636 why we're doing this. 46 00:00:58,636 --> 00:01:01,056 If our work helps one kid 47 00:00:58,636 --> 00:01:01,056 make better choices, 48 00:01:01,056 --> 00:01:02,891 then it will all be worth it. 49 00:01:02,891 --> 00:01:04,935 I wish I had seen 50 00:01:02,891 --> 00:01:04,935 a show like this. 51 00:01:04,935 --> 00:01:06,811 Might have helped me 52 00:01:04,935 --> 00:01:06,811 avoid mistakes. 53 00:01:06,811 --> 00:01:08,479 We're happy to do this for you. 54 00:01:08,479 --> 00:01:11,066 But my school had 55 00:01:08,479 --> 00:01:11,066 plenty of shows like this 56 00:01:11,066 --> 00:01:13,777 and I think sitting through them 57 00:01:11,066 --> 00:01:13,777 drove me to drugs. 58 00:01:13,777 --> 00:01:16,196 You don't count. 59 00:01:13,777 --> 00:01:16,196 You don't respond to anything. 60 00:01:16,196 --> 00:01:18,282 Thank you. 61 00:01:18,282 --> 00:01:21,159 Dean dong. 62 00:01:18,282 --> 00:01:21,159 Heh, heh, heh. 63 00:01:21,159 --> 00:01:22,744 I'm just checking in to see 64 00:01:22,744 --> 00:01:24,788 how the Greendale 65 00:01:22,744 --> 00:01:24,788 Anti-Drug Players are doing. 66 00:01:24,788 --> 00:01:27,958 I talked to the counselor 67 00:01:24,788 --> 00:01:27,958 at San Ramon Middle School. 68 00:01:27,958 --> 00:01:31,586 There's gonna be at least 69 00:01:27,958 --> 00:01:31,586 50 at-risk rugrats 70 00:01:31,586 --> 00:01:33,546 coming here tomorrow for 71 00:01:31,586 --> 00:01:33,546 your big world premiere. 72 00:01:33,546 --> 00:01:35,382 That's terrific. 73 00:01:33,546 --> 00:01:35,382 That's nice. 74 00:01:35,382 --> 00:01:38,385 With any luck, we'll get rid 75 00:01:35,382 --> 00:01:38,385 of all those Charleston Chews 76 00:01:38,385 --> 00:01:40,011 in the vending machines. 77 00:01:40,011 --> 00:01:43,890 Dean Pelton, were you hoping 78 00:01:40,011 --> 00:01:43,890 to participate in the show? 79 00:01:43,890 --> 00:01:45,434 Oh, I would love to, Annie. 80 00:01:45,434 --> 00:01:48,228 But as you can see from 81 00:01:45,434 --> 00:01:48,228 my outfit, I have plans. 82 00:01:48,228 --> 00:01:51,440 So, off to the airport Ramada. 83 00:01:51,440 --> 00:01:55,152 How come he gets 84 00:01:51,440 --> 00:01:55,152 a front stinger? 85 00:01:55,152 --> 00:01:56,611 [THE 88'S "AT LEAST IT WAS HERE" 86 00:01:55,152 --> 00:01:56,611 PLAYING] 87 00:02:23,554 --> 00:02:25,474 Do you think bees 88 00:02:23,554 --> 00:02:25,474 eat their own honey? 89 00:02:25,474 --> 00:02:27,476 I'm sure they've 90 00:02:25,474 --> 00:02:27,476 at least tasted it. 91 00:02:27,476 --> 00:02:29,144 This guy keeps texting me. 92 00:02:29,144 --> 00:02:31,771 You don't like him? 93 00:02:29,144 --> 00:02:31,771 I don't like flirting in text. 94 00:02:31,771 --> 00:02:34,732 That's like saying you 95 00:02:31,771 --> 00:02:34,732 don't work by electric light. 96 00:02:34,732 --> 00:02:37,319 You want an active sex life, 97 00:02:34,732 --> 00:02:37,319 part of it's texting. 98 00:02:37,319 --> 00:02:39,112 I don't remember 99 00:02:37,319 --> 00:02:39,112 asking your opinion. 100 00:02:39,112 --> 00:02:40,905 Can't talk now. 101 00:02:40,905 --> 00:02:44,034 Shirley, since I might be 102 00:02:40,905 --> 00:02:44,034 the father of your unborn child 103 00:02:44,034 --> 00:02:47,871 I made you a mix tape. 104 00:02:44,034 --> 00:02:47,871 I hope you like Johnny Gill. 105 00:02:47,871 --> 00:02:50,790 And since you probably 106 00:02:47,871 --> 00:02:50,790 don't have a cassette player, 107 00:02:50,790 --> 00:02:53,584 here's a list of used ones 108 00:02:50,790 --> 00:02:53,584 on Craigslist. 109 00:02:53,584 --> 00:02:55,544 Britta, are you 110 00:02:53,584 --> 00:02:55,544 walking out of this room? 111 00:02:55,544 --> 00:02:59,257 Uh, yeah. 112 00:02:59,257 --> 00:03:01,926 You know you're gonna have 113 00:02:59,257 --> 00:03:01,926 to acknowledge him eventually. 114 00:03:01,926 --> 00:03:02,927 Don't know 115 00:03:01,926 --> 00:03:02,927 who you're talking about. 116 00:03:02,927 --> 00:03:04,595 Chang. 117 00:03:04,595 --> 00:03:06,890 I know who you're talking about. 118 00:03:04,595 --> 00:03:06,890 He doesn't exist. 119 00:03:08,350 --> 00:03:09,934 Annie. 120 00:03:08,350 --> 00:03:09,934 Ooh! 121 00:03:09,934 --> 00:03:11,728 I'm sorry. A word? 122 00:03:09,934 --> 00:03:11,728 Mm-hm. 123 00:03:11,728 --> 00:03:13,188 I don't know if you know this, 124 00:03:13,188 --> 00:03:15,732 but I did TV commercials 125 00:03:13,188 --> 00:03:15,732 for Hawthorne Wipes, 126 00:03:15,732 --> 00:03:18,318 family business, in the '50s. 127 00:03:15,732 --> 00:03:18,318 Oh. Heh, heh. 128 00:03:18,318 --> 00:03:21,488 I was kind of the Gerber baby 129 00:03:18,318 --> 00:03:21,488 of moist towelettes. 130 00:03:21,488 --> 00:03:23,614 Heh, heh. 131 00:03:21,488 --> 00:03:23,614 That's great, Pierce. 132 00:03:23,614 --> 00:03:25,909 Yeah. I've done a lot 133 00:03:23,614 --> 00:03:25,909 of acting workshops. 134 00:03:25,909 --> 00:03:27,494 Hm. 135 00:03:27,494 --> 00:03:30,288 I do physical comedy, 136 00:03:27,494 --> 00:03:30,288 funny dances, 137 00:03:30,288 --> 00:03:31,748 foreign accents. 138 00:03:30,288 --> 00:03:31,748 Accents? 139 00:03:31,748 --> 00:03:34,251 Name any country. 140 00:03:31,748 --> 00:03:34,251 Russia. 141 00:03:34,251 --> 00:03:37,212 There are many tools 142 00:03:34,251 --> 00:03:37,212 I can bring to the table 143 00:03:37,212 --> 00:03:39,672 that I think the script 144 00:03:37,212 --> 00:03:39,672 may be wasting. 145 00:03:39,672 --> 00:03:42,759 Do you know what I think 146 00:03:39,672 --> 00:03:42,759 is really great about this show? 147 00:03:42,759 --> 00:03:45,470 The only real star of it 148 00:03:42,759 --> 00:03:45,470 is the message. 149 00:03:45,470 --> 00:03:47,931 Right, of course. 150 00:03:45,470 --> 00:03:47,931 Is the message Jeff Winger? 151 00:03:47,931 --> 00:03:49,682 He's on every page 152 00:03:47,931 --> 00:03:49,682 of this thing, and... 153 00:03:49,682 --> 00:03:53,311 I'll see you tomorrow. 154 00:03:49,682 --> 00:03:53,311 You bet. 155 00:03:56,189 --> 00:03:57,607 Britta left her phone. 156 00:03:57,607 --> 00:04:00,444 She's getting a text message. 157 00:03:57,607 --> 00:04:00,444 Let me see. 158 00:04:00,444 --> 00:04:02,779 Oh. It's from Marcus. 159 00:04:02,779 --> 00:04:04,448 "I'll be at the show 160 00:04:02,779 --> 00:04:04,448 tomorrow night. 161 00:04:04,448 --> 00:04:05,865 "Can't wait to see you. 162 00:04:05,865 --> 00:04:08,743 Are you really wearing 163 00:04:05,865 --> 00:04:08,743 a cat costume?" 164 00:04:08,743 --> 00:04:13,790 Well, Marcus, you are in luck. 165 00:04:08,743 --> 00:04:13,790 What are you doing? 166 00:04:13,790 --> 00:04:16,585 Dragging Britta kicking 167 00:04:13,790 --> 00:04:16,585 and screaming into 1997. 168 00:04:16,585 --> 00:04:17,919 What'd you say? 169 00:04:17,919 --> 00:04:19,546 "There's not much 170 00:04:17,919 --> 00:04:19,546 to the cat costume. 171 00:04:19,546 --> 00:04:21,923 But can't wait to show you 172 00:04:19,546 --> 00:04:21,923 what's underneath." 173 00:04:23,467 --> 00:04:25,385 How could you think 174 00:04:23,467 --> 00:04:25,385 that's a good idea? 175 00:04:25,385 --> 00:04:26,761 I got a better question. 176 00:04:26,761 --> 00:04:28,597 How could it not be 177 00:04:26,761 --> 00:04:28,597 a great idea? 178 00:04:48,492 --> 00:04:49,742 Thanks. 179 00:04:49,742 --> 00:04:51,911 Here you go. 180 00:05:10,930 --> 00:05:12,307 Wha...? 181 00:05:14,351 --> 00:05:16,978 Pierce, 182 00:05:14,351 --> 00:05:16,978 what are you doing here? 183 00:05:16,978 --> 00:05:19,939 Never mind that. 184 00:05:16,978 --> 00:05:19,939 There's a rapist in the hallway. 185 00:05:19,939 --> 00:05:21,732 That's my landlord. 186 00:05:21,732 --> 00:05:23,776 And If he wanted to rape you, 187 00:05:21,732 --> 00:05:23,776 you'd be raped. 188 00:05:23,776 --> 00:05:25,195 Did you follow me? 189 00:05:25,195 --> 00:05:27,238 Let me answer your question 190 00:05:25,195 --> 00:05:27,238 with two of my own. 191 00:05:27,238 --> 00:05:30,575 What are you doing in 192 00:05:27,238 --> 00:05:30,575 an apartment above Dildopolis? 193 00:05:30,575 --> 00:05:32,243 And when did they open 194 00:05:30,575 --> 00:05:32,243 a second location? 195 00:05:32,243 --> 00:05:34,538 This is where I live. 196 00:05:34,538 --> 00:05:36,665 It just happens to be 197 00:05:34,538 --> 00:05:36,665 above a marital aid store. 198 00:05:36,665 --> 00:05:39,042 I don't get it. 199 00:05:36,665 --> 00:05:39,042 Aren't everyone's parents rich? 200 00:05:39,042 --> 00:05:41,378 Well, I'm not speaking 201 00:05:39,042 --> 00:05:41,378 to my parents. 202 00:05:41,378 --> 00:05:42,711 After my breakdown, 203 00:05:42,711 --> 00:05:44,172 my mom wanted to put 204 00:05:42,711 --> 00:05:44,172 the problem behind us 205 00:05:44,172 --> 00:05:45,632 and I wanted to deal with it, 206 00:05:45,632 --> 00:05:48,176 so I went to rehab 207 00:05:45,632 --> 00:05:48,176 and she cut me off. 208 00:05:48,176 --> 00:05:50,470 What are you living on? 209 00:05:48,176 --> 00:05:50,470 I saved. 210 00:05:50,470 --> 00:05:53,097 Every penny from babysitting, 211 00:05:50,470 --> 00:05:53,097 every birthday check. 212 00:05:53,097 --> 00:05:55,808 Every dollar from the period 213 00:05:53,097 --> 00:05:55,808 fairy when I was a kid. 214 00:05:55,808 --> 00:05:57,101 I guess I thought 215 00:05:55,808 --> 00:05:57,101 it would last longer. 216 00:05:57,101 --> 00:05:59,937 Excuse me, 217 00:05:57,101 --> 00:05:59,937 what's a period fairy? 218 00:05:59,937 --> 00:06:01,814 The fairy 219 00:05:59,937 --> 00:06:01,814 that gives you a dollar 220 00:06:01,814 --> 00:06:03,400 every time 221 00:06:01,814 --> 00:06:03,400 you get your period. 222 00:06:03,400 --> 00:06:05,318 Does she still come? 223 00:06:03,400 --> 00:06:05,318 Pierce. 224 00:06:05,318 --> 00:06:08,071 You know, you and I 225 00:06:05,318 --> 00:06:08,071 are very much alike, Annie. 226 00:06:08,071 --> 00:06:10,198 We're both realists. 227 00:06:08,071 --> 00:06:10,198 We're both cute. 228 00:06:10,198 --> 00:06:14,703 And we'd both rather die than 229 00:06:10,198 --> 00:06:14,703 let someone else control us. 230 00:06:14,703 --> 00:06:17,746 I see the point 231 00:06:14,703 --> 00:06:17,746 of this place now. 232 00:06:17,746 --> 00:06:22,335 This crap hole is a monument 233 00:06:17,746 --> 00:06:22,335 to self-reliance. 234 00:06:22,335 --> 00:06:23,752 I found the drapes 235 00:06:22,335 --> 00:06:23,752 in a dumpster. 236 00:06:23,752 --> 00:06:25,796 Can you believe it? 237 00:06:23,752 --> 00:06:25,796 Heh, heh. Yes. 238 00:06:25,796 --> 00:06:29,718 You know, I wanna help, Annie. 239 00:06:25,796 --> 00:06:29,718 Oh, no, no, no, Pierce. 240 00:06:29,718 --> 00:06:33,762 Come on, now. 241 00:06:29,718 --> 00:06:33,762 I'm not taking money from you. 242 00:06:33,762 --> 00:06:35,348 It's not mine. 243 00:06:33,762 --> 00:06:35,348 It's yours. 244 00:06:35,348 --> 00:06:37,684 You've earned it 245 00:06:35,348 --> 00:06:37,684 for being strong. 246 00:06:37,684 --> 00:06:42,771 It's going to drop into your 247 00:06:37,684 --> 00:06:42,771 hands from out of nowhere... 248 00:06:42,771 --> 00:06:44,649 because I was never here. 249 00:06:46,443 --> 00:06:50,196 I'm only taking this because 250 00:06:46,443 --> 00:06:50,196 I'm worried about making rent 251 00:06:50,196 --> 00:06:52,574 and the procedure 252 00:06:50,196 --> 00:06:52,574 for selling eggs takes weeks. 253 00:06:52,574 --> 00:06:54,284 You save your eggs 254 00:06:52,574 --> 00:06:54,284 for a rainy day, 255 00:06:54,284 --> 00:06:56,035 and I'll see you tomorrow. 256 00:06:56,035 --> 00:06:57,370 Pierce? 257 00:07:05,420 --> 00:07:08,465 Hey, why did you 258 00:07:05,420 --> 00:07:08,465 follow me here today? 259 00:07:08,465 --> 00:07:13,553 Oh, it was nothing. 260 00:07:08,465 --> 00:07:13,553 It seems sort of pointless now. 261 00:07:13,553 --> 00:07:15,513 I guess it was 262 00:07:13,553 --> 00:07:15,513 to talk about the play. 263 00:07:15,513 --> 00:07:18,182 And who cares 264 00:07:15,513 --> 00:07:18,182 if I don't have any lines? 265 00:07:18,182 --> 00:07:21,060 You know what, you should 266 00:07:18,182 --> 00:07:21,060 do that line you improvised. 267 00:07:21,060 --> 00:07:22,479 "Don't call me honey, honey"? 268 00:07:22,479 --> 00:07:24,731 Yeah, that's it, 269 00:07:22,479 --> 00:07:24,731 you should do that. 270 00:07:24,731 --> 00:07:28,025 You were the Gerber baby 271 00:07:24,731 --> 00:07:28,025 of moist towelettes, right? 272 00:07:28,025 --> 00:07:29,944 Yes. Yes, I was. 273 00:07:29,944 --> 00:07:31,362 And action. 274 00:07:31,362 --> 00:07:34,907 Hello, 275 00:07:31,362 --> 00:07:34,907 I'm Cornelius Hawthorne. 276 00:07:34,907 --> 00:07:39,036 One rainy day, my son Pierce 277 00:07:34,907 --> 00:07:39,036 and I were taking a stroll 278 00:07:39,036 --> 00:07:41,372 when I discovered 279 00:07:39,036 --> 00:07:41,372 the cleansing power 280 00:07:41,372 --> 00:07:44,417 of moist cotton 281 00:07:41,372 --> 00:07:44,417 fresh from the field. 282 00:07:44,417 --> 00:07:45,960 Isn't that right, son? 283 00:07:45,960 --> 00:07:47,712 It sure is. 284 00:07:47,712 --> 00:07:49,547 It sure is, Dad. 285 00:07:49,547 --> 00:07:52,509 Pierce, knock it off. 286 00:07:52,509 --> 00:07:55,011 I want to be 287 00:07:52,509 --> 00:07:55,011 in the commercial too, father. 288 00:07:55,011 --> 00:07:58,222 Well, then you should've done 289 00:07:55,011 --> 00:07:58,222 better in your damn audition. 290 00:07:58,222 --> 00:08:01,851 What's your name, son? 291 00:07:58,222 --> 00:08:01,851 Nigel. 292 00:08:01,851 --> 00:08:03,978 You're a good boy, Nigel. 293 00:08:03,978 --> 00:08:07,106 Your father is a lucky man. 294 00:08:12,945 --> 00:08:15,031 Okay, guys, remember, 295 00:08:12,945 --> 00:08:15,031 the most important thing 296 00:08:15,031 --> 00:08:16,282 is to have fun. 297 00:08:16,282 --> 00:08:18,117 The second is to know 298 00:08:16,282 --> 00:08:18,117 all your lines 299 00:08:18,117 --> 00:08:19,536 and not mess up a thing. 300 00:08:19,536 --> 00:08:22,622 Actually, flip those. 301 00:08:19,536 --> 00:08:22,622 Here we go, guys. 302 00:08:22,622 --> 00:08:25,958 I took the liberty of 303 00:08:22,622 --> 00:08:25,958 juicing up some of our bits. 304 00:08:25,958 --> 00:08:29,420 Um, but... 305 00:08:25,958 --> 00:08:29,420 You can't revise Annie's script. 306 00:08:29,420 --> 00:08:31,756 And who uses Wite-Out anymore? 307 00:08:31,756 --> 00:08:33,924 Why don't we look over 308 00:08:31,756 --> 00:08:33,924 Pierce's changes 309 00:08:33,924 --> 00:08:35,926 and see if 310 00:08:33,924 --> 00:08:35,926 they improve things? 311 00:08:35,926 --> 00:08:38,513 Hey, Crayon, do you know 312 00:08:35,926 --> 00:08:38,513 where I can get some drugs? 313 00:08:38,513 --> 00:08:39,764 I need them. 314 00:08:39,764 --> 00:08:41,808 Unfortunately, 315 00:08:39,764 --> 00:08:41,808 you can get them anywhere. 316 00:08:41,808 --> 00:08:43,643 Anywhere? 317 00:08:41,808 --> 00:08:43,643 I'm here. 318 00:08:43,643 --> 00:08:45,478 Zabadazooey. 319 00:08:48,565 --> 00:08:51,735 Good one. 320 00:08:48,565 --> 00:08:51,735 Ha, ha, ha. 321 00:08:51,735 --> 00:08:53,319 Doesn't seem to hurt 322 00:08:51,735 --> 00:08:53,319 anything, 323 00:08:53,319 --> 00:08:56,280 so let's get into costume 324 00:08:53,319 --> 00:08:56,280 and break a stinger. 325 00:08:56,280 --> 00:08:57,657 For the bees. 326 00:08:57,657 --> 00:09:00,535 Annie, uh, 327 00:08:57,657 --> 00:09:00,535 I don't feel comfortable 328 00:09:00,535 --> 00:09:02,245 with the "zabadazooey" line. 329 00:09:02,245 --> 00:09:04,622 The one you wrote? 330 00:09:02,245 --> 00:09:04,622 I got it. 331 00:09:04,622 --> 00:09:06,666 Let's give Jeff 332 00:09:04,622 --> 00:09:06,666 the zabadazooey line, 333 00:09:06,666 --> 00:09:08,918 and I'll come in 334 00:09:06,666 --> 00:09:08,918 with "good one." 335 00:09:08,918 --> 00:09:10,795 Yeah. 336 00:09:08,918 --> 00:09:10,795 It's more in my voice. 337 00:09:10,795 --> 00:09:12,881 I'm sure Jeff 338 00:09:10,795 --> 00:09:12,881 is gonna reject that idea. 339 00:09:12,881 --> 00:09:14,632 Yeah, you're probably right. 340 00:09:14,632 --> 00:09:17,968 You're the producer. 341 00:09:14,632 --> 00:09:17,968 By the way, is this your pen? 342 00:09:17,968 --> 00:09:20,722 I think I put it 343 00:09:17,968 --> 00:09:20,722 back in my pocket 344 00:09:20,722 --> 00:09:24,225 after I wrote you 345 00:09:20,722 --> 00:09:24,225 that check yesterday. Ahem. 346 00:09:24,225 --> 00:09:26,603 I'll give it to you later. 347 00:09:24,225 --> 00:09:26,603 I'll talk to Jeff. 348 00:09:26,603 --> 00:09:28,979 Also, I think it'd be 349 00:09:26,603 --> 00:09:28,979 better for my character 350 00:09:28,979 --> 00:09:32,275 if I wear 351 00:09:28,979 --> 00:09:32,275 his leather jacket. 352 00:09:32,275 --> 00:09:37,405 Okay, welcome to Greendale's 353 00:09:32,275 --> 00:09:37,405 Drug Awareness Show! 354 00:09:39,073 --> 00:09:42,368 Okay, our volunteers 355 00:09:39,073 --> 00:09:42,368 are handing out 356 00:09:42,368 --> 00:09:45,622 drug-free baseballs! 357 00:09:42,368 --> 00:09:45,622 Huh? 358 00:09:45,622 --> 00:09:48,374 Next time 359 00:09:45,622 --> 00:09:48,374 you think about drugs, 360 00:09:48,374 --> 00:09:51,043 think about baseball instead. 361 00:09:52,629 --> 00:09:54,171 You can't ignore me forever. 362 00:09:56,299 --> 00:09:59,510 Okay, you probably can. 363 00:09:59,510 --> 00:10:02,472 I don't know 364 00:09:59,510 --> 00:10:02,472 why you want to. 365 00:10:02,472 --> 00:10:05,892 My nephew Marcus actually goes 366 00:10:02,472 --> 00:10:05,892 to San Ramon Middle School, 367 00:10:05,892 --> 00:10:07,727 and he's coming 368 00:10:05,892 --> 00:10:07,727 to see the show. 369 00:10:07,727 --> 00:10:09,520 Marcus? 370 00:10:07,727 --> 00:10:09,520 Your nephew? 371 00:10:09,520 --> 00:10:12,189 He's 14. I actually thought 372 00:10:09,520 --> 00:10:12,189 he didn't even like me. 373 00:10:12,189 --> 00:10:14,901 But he texted me and he said, 374 00:10:12,189 --> 00:10:14,901 "Can't wait to see you. 375 00:10:14,901 --> 00:10:16,778 "I've been looking 376 00:10:14,901 --> 00:10:16,778 forward to this. 377 00:10:16,778 --> 00:10:19,322 You are the coolest aunt 378 00:10:16,778 --> 00:10:19,322 in the world." 379 00:10:19,322 --> 00:10:21,491 I hope that I don't 380 00:10:19,322 --> 00:10:21,491 let him down. 381 00:10:21,491 --> 00:10:23,618 You'll be great. 382 00:10:21,491 --> 00:10:23,618 What does this mean? 383 00:10:23,618 --> 00:10:25,703 It's eight, an equal sign 384 00:10:23,618 --> 00:10:25,703 and a greater than symbol? 385 00:10:25,703 --> 00:10:28,164 Let me see. 386 00:10:25,703 --> 00:10:28,164 You better get changed. 387 00:10:28,164 --> 00:10:29,540 I'll hang onto your stuff 388 00:10:28,164 --> 00:10:29,540 for you. 389 00:10:29,540 --> 00:10:31,000 Right. 390 00:10:32,418 --> 00:10:36,339 Abed, we screwed up. 391 00:10:32,418 --> 00:10:36,339 You know that text we sent? 392 00:10:36,339 --> 00:10:37,924 It was to Britta's nephew. 393 00:10:37,924 --> 00:10:41,594 He sent her an emotipenis. 394 00:10:37,924 --> 00:10:41,594 What are we gonna do? 395 00:10:45,473 --> 00:10:48,935 Fine. Screw you, Abed. 396 00:10:45,473 --> 00:10:48,935 I can fix this. 397 00:10:48,935 --> 00:10:50,687 "Marcus, I made a mistake. 398 00:10:50,687 --> 00:10:52,313 I texted the wrong person 399 00:10:50,687 --> 00:10:52,313 last night." 400 00:10:56,025 --> 00:10:58,486 "You called me by name. 401 00:10:56,025 --> 00:10:58,486 It wasn't a mistake. 402 00:10:58,486 --> 00:11:00,530 Don't be afraid." 403 00:11:02,198 --> 00:11:03,491 Screw you, Abed. 404 00:11:03,491 --> 00:11:05,368 "I was drunk. 405 00:11:03,491 --> 00:11:05,368 We can't do this." 406 00:11:08,120 --> 00:11:10,623 "I'm drunk too. 407 00:11:08,120 --> 00:11:10,623 On lust." 408 00:11:10,623 --> 00:11:12,416 There's a picture. 409 00:11:12,416 --> 00:11:15,920 Oh. That's disappointing. 410 00:11:12,416 --> 00:11:15,920 Wow. Who does that? 411 00:11:15,920 --> 00:11:17,421 That's... 412 00:11:15,920 --> 00:11:17,421 Bees, you're up. 413 00:11:17,421 --> 00:11:19,298 Cool cats, you're on deck. 414 00:11:19,298 --> 00:11:22,050 Aren't drugs bad? 415 00:11:19,298 --> 00:11:22,050 No way. 416 00:11:22,050 --> 00:11:25,596 Drugs are like special honey. 417 00:11:22,050 --> 00:11:25,596 They give you a buzzzz. 418 00:11:25,596 --> 00:11:28,016 Don't call me honey, honey. 419 00:11:30,267 --> 00:11:32,687 Are you ignoring me 420 00:11:30,267 --> 00:11:32,687 because I'm Korean? 421 00:11:32,687 --> 00:11:34,814 You're Chinese. 422 00:11:32,687 --> 00:11:34,814 Oh, there's a difference? 423 00:11:34,814 --> 00:11:36,190 Shh! 424 00:11:36,190 --> 00:11:38,651 It's because you're crazy. 425 00:11:38,651 --> 00:11:39,861 There's something wrong 426 00:11:38,651 --> 00:11:39,861 with you. 427 00:11:39,861 --> 00:11:42,321 And the idea 428 00:11:39,861 --> 00:11:42,321 that I was with you 429 00:11:42,321 --> 00:11:44,574 means there's something 430 00:11:42,321 --> 00:11:44,574 wrong with me. 431 00:11:44,574 --> 00:11:46,074 And if this baby... 432 00:11:46,074 --> 00:11:49,328 If you have 433 00:11:46,074 --> 00:11:49,328 any humanity at all, 434 00:11:49,328 --> 00:11:51,247 you will not make me 435 00:11:49,328 --> 00:11:51,247 think about it. 436 00:11:51,247 --> 00:11:53,041 Shirley, funeral. 437 00:11:59,338 --> 00:12:01,674 Well, that answers my question. 438 00:12:01,674 --> 00:12:05,762 Jeff Winger is sexy 439 00:12:01,674 --> 00:12:05,762 even in a coffin. Hmm. 440 00:12:11,475 --> 00:12:12,977 I'm here. 441 00:12:12,977 --> 00:12:14,437 You're supposed to be on-stage. 442 00:12:14,437 --> 00:12:16,940 I was looking 443 00:12:14,437 --> 00:12:16,940 for a lighter. 444 00:12:16,940 --> 00:12:18,733 What are you wearing? 445 00:12:16,940 --> 00:12:18,733 This is a funeral. 446 00:12:18,733 --> 00:12:20,902 I got this, Annie. 447 00:12:18,733 --> 00:12:20,902 Uh... 448 00:12:20,902 --> 00:12:22,695 I can't believe 449 00:12:20,902 --> 00:12:22,695 Fluffy's dead. 450 00:12:22,695 --> 00:12:26,407 I know I'm green, 451 00:12:22,695 --> 00:12:26,407 but I feel blue. 452 00:12:29,535 --> 00:12:33,205 Look, it's Drugs with 453 00:12:29,535 --> 00:12:33,205 a crazy wig and sparklers. 454 00:12:33,205 --> 00:12:35,041 Pokémon! 455 00:12:36,960 --> 00:12:39,211 I don't think 456 00:12:36,960 --> 00:12:39,211 that's right, Drugs. 457 00:12:39,211 --> 00:12:42,090 Nobody asked you, Crayon. 458 00:12:47,428 --> 00:12:50,514 I hope you're proud of yourself. 459 00:12:47,428 --> 00:12:50,514 Look what you've done. 460 00:12:50,514 --> 00:12:53,183 Oh, yeah? 461 00:12:50,514 --> 00:12:53,183 Well, look what I'm doing now. 462 00:12:58,106 --> 00:13:00,316 It smells like 463 00:12:58,106 --> 00:13:00,316 something died in here. 464 00:13:03,486 --> 00:13:06,572 Should we get the dean, 465 00:13:03,486 --> 00:13:06,572 call in a bomb threat? 466 00:13:06,572 --> 00:13:08,407 Should we set off 467 00:13:06,572 --> 00:13:08,407 the sprinklers? 468 00:13:08,407 --> 00:13:10,534 It's not that big a deal. 469 00:13:08,407 --> 00:13:10,534 The kids are into it. 470 00:13:10,534 --> 00:13:13,121 I don't think they're 471 00:13:10,534 --> 00:13:13,121 getting the message. 472 00:13:13,121 --> 00:13:15,790 Do kids ever seem like 473 00:13:13,121 --> 00:13:15,790 they're getting the message? 474 00:13:15,790 --> 00:13:18,459 I think it's sinking in. 475 00:13:15,790 --> 00:13:18,459 It's your call. 476 00:13:18,459 --> 00:13:20,670 And he's about to get 477 00:13:18,459 --> 00:13:20,670 flushed down a toilet 478 00:13:20,670 --> 00:13:22,922 in the next scene. 479 00:13:20,670 --> 00:13:22,922 And he'll be done. 480 00:13:24,132 --> 00:13:26,717 I wish I had never even 481 00:13:24,132 --> 00:13:26,717 met Drugs. 482 00:13:28,511 --> 00:13:30,638 Who invited the nerd 483 00:13:28,511 --> 00:13:30,638 from the beehive? 484 00:13:30,638 --> 00:13:32,098 Ha, ha, ha. 485 00:13:32,098 --> 00:13:33,641 Drugs made you. 486 00:13:37,561 --> 00:13:39,022 How about you leave, Drugs? 487 00:13:40,815 --> 00:13:44,234 Zip, zop, zoo. 488 00:13:48,072 --> 00:13:50,741 They want more. 489 00:13:48,072 --> 00:13:50,741 I gotta go back out there. 490 00:13:50,741 --> 00:13:53,327 But, Pierce, you were flushed. 491 00:13:50,741 --> 00:13:53,327 That was the story. 492 00:13:53,327 --> 00:13:54,996 That's what's 493 00:13:53,327 --> 00:13:54,996 supposed to happen. 494 00:13:54,996 --> 00:13:57,790 Being flushed doesn't mean 495 00:13:54,996 --> 00:13:57,790 you're dead. 496 00:13:57,790 --> 00:13:59,416 I could be a floater. 497 00:13:59,416 --> 00:14:01,460 A floater is when 498 00:13:59,416 --> 00:14:01,460 you have a number two... 499 00:14:01,460 --> 00:14:03,671 I know what a floater is, 500 00:14:01,460 --> 00:14:03,671 Pierce. 501 00:14:03,671 --> 00:14:06,549 It just wouldn't make any sense 502 00:14:03,671 --> 00:14:06,549 in the flow of the show. 503 00:14:06,549 --> 00:14:08,134 And it sends 504 00:14:06,549 --> 00:14:08,134 a mixed message. 505 00:14:08,134 --> 00:14:09,844 Know what I think 506 00:14:08,134 --> 00:14:09,844 is a mixed message? 507 00:14:09,844 --> 00:14:13,389 Yesterday you couldn't pay 508 00:14:09,844 --> 00:14:13,389 your rent, and today you can. 509 00:14:13,389 --> 00:14:15,850 Come on, Annie. 510 00:14:13,389 --> 00:14:15,850 You and I are alike. 511 00:14:15,850 --> 00:14:18,102 We're independent, 512 00:14:15,850 --> 00:14:18,102 we need each other. 513 00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:25,985 Bzzz. Getting rid of Drugs 514 00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:25,985 was a great "I-bee-a." 515 00:14:25,985 --> 00:14:28,946 I'm flying higher 516 00:14:25,985 --> 00:14:28,946 than I ever have, 517 00:14:28,946 --> 00:14:30,322 thanks to not Drugs. 518 00:14:28,946 --> 00:14:30,322 Argh! 519 00:14:30,322 --> 00:14:32,366 Chuck it at his nuts! 520 00:14:32,366 --> 00:14:35,036 Hey! 521 00:14:32,366 --> 00:14:35,036 Ow! Hey! 522 00:14:35,036 --> 00:14:37,246 Hey! 523 00:14:37,246 --> 00:14:39,123 I'm back. 524 00:14:41,542 --> 00:14:44,837 Ain't no party without Drugs. 525 00:14:55,264 --> 00:14:57,767 I love you, Drugs. 526 00:14:57,767 --> 00:15:00,853 Yo, pass it this way. 527 00:15:03,731 --> 00:15:05,441 We want Drugs! 528 00:15:05,441 --> 00:15:06,943 Listen to that, Dad. 529 00:15:06,943 --> 00:15:10,362 They're high on me. 530 00:15:06,943 --> 00:15:10,362 I'm a god. 531 00:15:10,362 --> 00:15:11,906 We want Drugs! 532 00:15:11,906 --> 00:15:13,991 Where's that Nigel now? 533 00:15:13,991 --> 00:15:16,035 And I haven't even used 534 00:15:13,991 --> 00:15:16,035 my penis material yet. 535 00:15:16,035 --> 00:15:17,369 Pierce, enough. 536 00:15:17,369 --> 00:15:19,538 We're going back 537 00:15:17,369 --> 00:15:19,538 to the original script 538 00:15:19,538 --> 00:15:21,207 and doing some 539 00:15:19,538 --> 00:15:21,207 damage control. 540 00:15:21,207 --> 00:15:22,750 Damage? 541 00:15:21,207 --> 00:15:22,750 The only damage 542 00:15:22,750 --> 00:15:24,919 is me blowing the roof 543 00:15:22,750 --> 00:15:24,919 off the universe. 544 00:15:24,919 --> 00:15:27,421 I am not letting you 545 00:15:24,919 --> 00:15:27,421 go back on that stage. 546 00:15:27,421 --> 00:15:30,299 Well, maybe I won't be visiting 547 00:15:27,421 --> 00:15:30,299 you late at night anymore 548 00:15:30,299 --> 00:15:32,342 with a generous spirit. 549 00:15:34,511 --> 00:15:39,642 You sick, sick, 550 00:15:34,511 --> 00:15:39,642 sad old man. 551 00:15:39,642 --> 00:15:41,435 This is why I didn't wanna 552 00:15:39,642 --> 00:15:41,435 take money from my parents. 553 00:15:41,435 --> 00:15:43,395 I don't want anybody 554 00:15:41,435 --> 00:15:43,395 pulling my strings. 555 00:15:43,395 --> 00:15:46,190 Wait, wait, 556 00:15:43,395 --> 00:15:46,190 is he giving you money? 557 00:15:46,190 --> 00:15:48,818 Not anymore. 558 00:15:46,190 --> 00:15:48,818 Pierce bought his way in. 559 00:15:48,818 --> 00:15:50,360 Annie sold out her message. 560 00:15:50,360 --> 00:15:53,405 You've been 561 00:15:50,360 --> 00:15:53,405 indulging this maniac? 562 00:15:53,405 --> 00:15:57,660 Yes, I've been 563 00:15:53,405 --> 00:15:57,660 indulging this maniac. 564 00:15:58,661 --> 00:16:00,746 You're fired. 565 00:15:58,661 --> 00:16:00,746 Fired? 566 00:16:00,746 --> 00:16:02,456 Next time I'm at Dildopolis, 567 00:16:02,456 --> 00:16:04,583 I will not be coming upstairs 568 00:16:02,456 --> 00:16:04,583 to say hi. 569 00:16:07,962 --> 00:16:09,338 The only reason we did this 570 00:16:09,338 --> 00:16:11,174 was for you 571 00:16:09,338 --> 00:16:11,174 and your stupid ideals. 572 00:16:11,174 --> 00:16:13,050 It turns out 573 00:16:11,174 --> 00:16:13,050 you don't even have any. 574 00:16:13,050 --> 00:16:14,677 We supported you, Annie. 575 00:16:14,677 --> 00:16:17,180 Yeah, Annie, 576 00:16:14,677 --> 00:16:17,180 you're fired. 577 00:16:17,180 --> 00:16:19,765 I'm sorry. 578 00:16:19,765 --> 00:16:23,477 Here's the situation. 579 00:16:19,765 --> 00:16:23,477 We've got 50 at-risk pre-teens 580 00:16:23,477 --> 00:16:26,230 armed with baseballs, 581 00:16:23,477 --> 00:16:26,230 chanting for drugs, 582 00:16:26,230 --> 00:16:28,482 who just spent intermission 583 00:16:26,230 --> 00:16:28,482 eating nothing but 584 00:16:28,482 --> 00:16:30,109 Charleston Chews. 585 00:16:28,482 --> 00:16:30,109 Thank God. 586 00:16:30,109 --> 00:16:32,862 Hope you can top Act I, 587 00:16:30,109 --> 00:16:32,862 is all I'm saying. 588 00:16:32,862 --> 00:16:35,239 Oh. Hmm. Whoops. 589 00:16:36,657 --> 00:16:38,492 Should we bail? 590 00:16:36,657 --> 00:16:38,492 Works for me. 591 00:16:38,492 --> 00:16:40,577 Wait. 592 00:16:41,996 --> 00:16:44,540 Listen to those kids. 593 00:16:44,540 --> 00:16:46,667 We just created 594 00:16:44,540 --> 00:16:46,667 50 potential meth-heads. 595 00:16:46,667 --> 00:16:48,878 The least we can do 596 00:16:46,667 --> 00:16:48,878 is hit the reset button 597 00:16:48,878 --> 00:16:51,380 and get that number 598 00:16:48,878 --> 00:16:51,380 down to average. 599 00:16:51,380 --> 00:16:56,219 That's a suicide mission. 600 00:16:51,380 --> 00:16:56,219 Did someone say crazy person? 601 00:16:56,219 --> 00:16:57,761 No. 602 00:16:56,219 --> 00:16:57,761 No. 603 00:16:57,761 --> 00:16:59,763 Well, I heard it. 604 00:16:59,763 --> 00:17:03,433 We want Drugs! 605 00:16:59,763 --> 00:17:03,433 We want Drugs! 606 00:17:03,433 --> 00:17:05,519 Greetings, you little snots. 607 00:17:07,646 --> 00:17:09,398 You're not Drugs. 608 00:17:09,398 --> 00:17:11,067 Oh, but I am. 609 00:17:11,067 --> 00:17:13,027 Disappointed? 610 00:17:13,027 --> 00:17:16,989 Did you expect me 611 00:17:13,027 --> 00:17:16,989 to stay the same forever? 612 00:17:16,989 --> 00:17:19,992 Because that's not 613 00:17:16,989 --> 00:17:19,992 what Drugs does, baby! 614 00:17:19,992 --> 00:17:23,495 I'm gonna deep-fry your dog 615 00:17:19,992 --> 00:17:23,495 and eat your mama's face. 616 00:17:23,495 --> 00:17:24,997 And I'm gonna wear 617 00:17:24,997 --> 00:17:27,750 your little brother's skin 618 00:17:24,997 --> 00:17:27,750 like pajamas. 619 00:17:27,750 --> 00:17:34,048 I control your lives 620 00:17:27,750 --> 00:17:34,048 and there is nothing you can do. 621 00:17:34,048 --> 00:17:35,632 Let's kill him. 622 00:17:35,632 --> 00:17:37,718 Oh, bring it on, Bow Wow. 623 00:17:37,718 --> 00:17:40,971 Get him. 624 00:17:37,718 --> 00:17:40,971 Ah! 625 00:17:42,390 --> 00:17:45,893 Is that all you got? 626 00:17:42,390 --> 00:17:45,893 I gotta tell you, 627 00:17:45,893 --> 00:17:48,354 this is the greatest 628 00:17:45,893 --> 00:17:48,354 chemical-dependency program 629 00:17:48,354 --> 00:17:49,939 I have ever watched. 630 00:17:49,939 --> 00:17:52,942 The way you got the kids 631 00:17:49,939 --> 00:17:52,942 to think that they needed drugs. 632 00:17:52,942 --> 00:17:56,028 And then having them realize 633 00:17:52,942 --> 00:17:56,028 that dependence was the enemy. 634 00:17:56,028 --> 00:17:57,613 That the price 635 00:17:56,028 --> 00:17:57,613 was just too high. 636 00:17:57,613 --> 00:17:58,864 Genius. 637 00:17:58,864 --> 00:18:01,284 So now that the show is over, 638 00:18:01,284 --> 00:18:05,037 what is the plan 639 00:18:01,284 --> 00:18:05,037 for these bee costumes? 640 00:18:06,538 --> 00:18:08,624 Hey, Marcus. 641 00:18:06,538 --> 00:18:08,624 I'm Jeff. 642 00:18:08,624 --> 00:18:11,168 I'm, like, uh, 643 00:18:08,624 --> 00:18:11,168 Britta's boyfriend. 644 00:18:11,168 --> 00:18:14,088 Look, dude, she started it. 645 00:18:11,168 --> 00:18:14,088 She's just as into me. 646 00:18:14,088 --> 00:18:15,631 No, listen, 647 00:18:14,088 --> 00:18:15,631 I'm not mad. 648 00:18:15,631 --> 00:18:18,301 I was just fooling around 649 00:18:15,631 --> 00:18:18,301 and I sent those texts. 650 00:18:18,301 --> 00:18:20,469 Gross. 651 00:18:18,301 --> 00:18:20,469 Yeah. 652 00:18:20,469 --> 00:18:23,097 It's disgusting, sending 653 00:18:20,469 --> 00:18:23,097 those pictures to your aunt. 654 00:18:23,097 --> 00:18:25,975 More disgusting than what 655 00:18:23,097 --> 00:18:25,975 you texted to an underage boy? 656 00:18:25,975 --> 00:18:27,351 I didn't know 657 00:18:25,975 --> 00:18:27,351 you were you. 658 00:18:27,351 --> 00:18:29,228 I didn't know 659 00:18:27,351 --> 00:18:29,228 you weren't my aunt. 660 00:18:29,228 --> 00:18:31,021 Okay. Let's just 661 00:18:29,228 --> 00:18:31,021 call this a draw. 662 00:18:31,021 --> 00:18:33,565 Britta doesn't need 663 00:18:31,021 --> 00:18:33,565 to ever know about this. 664 00:18:33,565 --> 00:18:36,319 Okay, I'd be happy to, 665 00:18:33,565 --> 00:18:36,319 for a price. 666 00:18:37,903 --> 00:18:39,447 That was brave of you. 667 00:18:39,447 --> 00:18:42,450 I owe you an apology. 668 00:18:42,450 --> 00:18:44,743 It was rude 669 00:18:42,450 --> 00:18:44,743 to call you crazy. 670 00:18:44,743 --> 00:18:47,579 Maybe I haven't been 671 00:18:44,743 --> 00:18:47,579 giving you enough credit. 672 00:18:47,579 --> 00:18:50,040 Oh, that's really sweet. 673 00:18:50,040 --> 00:18:52,418 Tell you what, 674 00:18:50,040 --> 00:18:52,418 why don't I go get Chang, 675 00:18:52,418 --> 00:18:53,794 and you can tell him that 676 00:18:52,418 --> 00:18:53,794 yourself. 677 00:18:53,794 --> 00:18:56,297 Heh, heh. 678 00:18:56,297 --> 00:18:57,756 Oh, no. 679 00:18:57,756 --> 00:18:59,758 My God, that was amazing. 680 00:18:59,758 --> 00:19:02,636 Good job, you saved the day. 681 00:18:59,758 --> 00:19:02,636 That's amazing. 682 00:19:02,636 --> 00:19:04,388 Way to go, man. 683 00:19:02,636 --> 00:19:04,388 Way to go. 684 00:19:04,388 --> 00:19:06,307 They beat the crap out of you. 685 00:19:06,307 --> 00:19:07,641 That's awesome. 686 00:19:07,641 --> 00:19:09,018 It was okay. 687 00:19:07,641 --> 00:19:09,018 I did lots of ad-libbing... 688 00:19:09,018 --> 00:19:12,480 I'm so sorry. 689 00:19:09,018 --> 00:19:12,480 Thank you so much. 690 00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:15,065 That was amazing. 691 00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:15,065 Even I learned something. 692 00:19:15,065 --> 00:19:17,567 Oh, Annie. 693 00:19:15,065 --> 00:19:17,567 We did it. 694 00:19:17,567 --> 00:19:19,736 Group hug, group hug. 695 00:19:17,567 --> 00:19:19,736 Oh, thanks. 696 00:19:19,736 --> 00:19:22,239 Way to save the day. 697 00:19:19,736 --> 00:19:22,239 Nice work. 698 00:19:22,239 --> 00:19:23,740 Oh, love you. 699 00:19:23,740 --> 00:19:26,327 Did you get hit in the face? 700 00:19:26,327 --> 00:19:29,288 Before you say anything, 701 00:19:26,327 --> 00:19:29,288 I want you to know, 702 00:19:29,288 --> 00:19:30,539 even though 703 00:19:29,288 --> 00:19:30,539 I did nothing wrong, 704 00:19:30,539 --> 00:19:31,915 I'm still gonna 705 00:19:30,539 --> 00:19:31,915 give you money. 706 00:19:31,915 --> 00:19:33,876 No, I can't take 707 00:19:31,915 --> 00:19:33,876 your money, Pierce. 708 00:19:33,876 --> 00:19:37,338 I can't go from depending on 709 00:19:33,876 --> 00:19:37,338 my parents to depending on you, 710 00:19:37,338 --> 00:19:39,631 which is why 711 00:19:37,338 --> 00:19:39,631 I'm gonna get a job. 712 00:19:39,631 --> 00:19:42,634 So you're cutting me off? 713 00:19:39,631 --> 00:19:42,634 No. 714 00:19:42,634 --> 00:19:45,513 Pierce, I know you don't 715 00:19:42,634 --> 00:19:45,513 depend on anyone, 716 00:19:45,513 --> 00:19:47,973 but you do depend on people 717 00:19:45,513 --> 00:19:47,973 depending on you. 718 00:19:47,973 --> 00:19:50,642 So I'm not gonna take 719 00:19:47,973 --> 00:19:50,642 your money. 720 00:19:50,642 --> 00:19:53,854 We're still friends? 721 00:19:50,642 --> 00:19:53,854 Give me a day. 722 00:19:53,854 --> 00:19:57,983 By the way, your mom 723 00:19:53,854 --> 00:19:57,983 was the period fairy, right? 724 00:19:57,983 --> 00:20:00,903 Hey, guys, I found my phone, 725 00:19:57,983 --> 00:20:00,903 but has anyone seen my bra? 726 00:20:07,034 --> 00:20:08,577 It's 2 a.m., 727 00:20:08,577 --> 00:20:11,872 time for Dildopolis' 728 00:20:08,577 --> 00:20:11,872 Night Owl Deals. 729 00:20:11,872 --> 00:20:13,416 Please be advised, 730 00:20:13,416 --> 00:20:15,125 we will be closed 731 00:20:13,416 --> 00:20:15,125 for Presidents' Day. 732 00:20:15,125 --> 00:20:18,628 Just kidding. 733 00:20:15,125 --> 00:20:18,628 Dildopolis never closes. 734 00:20:18,628 --> 00:20:22,216 At Dildopolis, your privacy 735 00:20:18,628 --> 00:20:22,216 is our top concern. 736 00:20:22,216 --> 00:20:25,135 All store purchases will 737 00:20:22,216 --> 00:20:25,135 show up on your credit card 738 00:20:25,135 --> 00:20:28,013 as ABC Dildos, Incorporated. 739 00:20:28,013 --> 00:20:29,306 Shopping till you drop? 740 00:20:29,306 --> 00:20:31,725 Take a load off 741 00:20:29,306 --> 00:20:31,725 at our in-store cafe 742 00:20:31,725 --> 00:20:36,772 and enjoy an espresso or our 743 00:20:31,725 --> 00:20:36,772 signature cinnamon biscotti.