1
00:00:34,827 --> 00:00:35,995
Ah! Sunday at The Clam.

2
00:00:36,078 --> 00:00:39,207
No family. Just football,
farts and friends.

3
00:00:39,290 --> 00:00:41,542
Hey, Jerome, could
you turn the volume up?

4
00:00:41,626 --> 00:00:45,171
And nothing like a national ad with
mismatched local audio at the end.

5
00:00:45,326 --> 00:00:46,828
The new Chevy Blazer.

6
00:00:46,839 --> 00:00:49,675
All roads, all seasons. Go explore.

7
00:00:49,759 --> 00:00:52,094
Shop our deals at Cerrone's Auto Barn.

8
00:00:52,178 --> 00:00:53,304
Route one, Pawtucket.

9
00:00:56,629 --> 00:00:57,797
And that'll do it.

10
00:00:57,808 --> 00:01:00,686
Here from Denver where the
Patriots lose their fifth straight,

11
00:01:00,697 --> 00:01:01,823
41 to six.

12
00:01:02,052 --> 00:01:04,596
Ugh, I hate that people
in Denver get to be happy

13
00:01:04,607 --> 00:01:07,109
the rest of the afternoon
while we have to be sad.

14
00:01:07,193 --> 00:01:09,695
It's only two o'clock
there. Mountain time.

15
00:01:09,779 --> 00:01:11,280
The man knows his zones.

16
00:01:11,364 --> 00:01:13,658
The only good thing about the
game was listening to Tom Brady.

17
00:01:13,741 --> 00:01:15,660
Yeah, it's fun having him in the booth.

18
00:01:15,743 --> 00:01:18,204
Guys, he's doing the game
next week at Foxborough.

19
00:01:18,287 --> 00:01:20,122
- We should go!
- I don't know.

20
00:01:20,206 --> 00:01:22,333
The traffic on Route One is a nightmare.

21
00:01:22,416 --> 00:01:24,710
I'll tell you what isn't
a nightmare on Route One.

22
00:01:24,794 --> 00:01:27,505
The savings at
Cerrone's Auto Barn in Pawtucket.

23
00:01:27,588 --> 00:01:29,757
You kind of heard the man. We're going.

24
00:01:33,970 --> 00:01:35,388
Brian! Treat!

25
00:01:37,723 --> 00:01:39,058
Where is it? Where is it?

26
00:01:39,141 --> 00:01:40,977
- I've been a good boy.
- Yeah, I don't have a treat.

27
00:01:41,060 --> 00:01:42,687
I just need your help moving a mattress.

28
00:01:42,770 --> 00:01:44,647
Don't do that! You have no idea!

29
00:01:44,730 --> 00:01:46,482
Okay, whoa, jeez, whatever!

30
00:01:46,565 --> 00:01:48,484
Anyway, Rupert has
somehow got his leg stuck

31
00:01:48,567 --> 00:01:50,403
between the side of the
crib and the mattress.

32
00:01:50,486 --> 00:01:52,613
Looks like he's
also handcuffed to the bars.

33
00:01:52,697 --> 00:01:54,740
Yeah, that's something else.
Let's focus on the mattress.

34
00:01:54,824 --> 00:01:57,159
I need you to help me
move it so we can free him.

35
00:02:01,455 --> 00:02:02,540
What the deuce!

36
00:02:02,623 --> 00:02:04,875
Brian, is that a built-in ashtray?

37
00:02:04,959 --> 00:02:07,545
- Appears to be, yeah.
- How old is this crib?

38
00:02:07,628 --> 00:02:09,213
Well, I think a lot of the stuff in here

39
00:02:09,297 --> 00:02:11,090
is hand-me-downs from Meg and Chris.

40
00:02:11,173 --> 00:02:12,466
And Peter and Lois before them.

41
00:02:12,550 --> 00:02:15,928
Wait! Parents would smoke while
putting the baby down for a nap?

42
00:02:16,012 --> 00:02:18,347
No, the baby would smoke
while the parents were at work.

43
00:02:18,431 --> 00:02:20,641
This was before babysitters,
you gotta remember.

44
00:02:20,725 --> 00:02:24,020
Ugh! I deserve better than
this white trash furniture!

45
00:02:24,103 --> 00:02:26,022
Well, maybe the place could
use some freshening up.

46
00:02:26,105 --> 00:02:27,815
You know what? I'll take you to IKEA.

47
00:02:27,898 --> 00:02:28,899
What's that?

48
00:02:28,983 --> 00:02:30,418
It's a furniture store
where people go to

49
00:02:30,428 --> 00:02:32,403
eat meatballs and
argue with their wives.

50
00:02:32,486 --> 00:02:34,196
Oh, right. That place near the airport.

51
00:02:34,280 --> 00:02:36,407
Yeah, they're always near the airport.

52
00:02:36,490 --> 00:02:37,825
And no other stores.

53
00:02:49,795 --> 00:02:52,882
Uh-oh! I think she's
holding it until the flyover.

54
00:02:56,761 --> 00:02:58,304
Boy, they're really late today.

55
00:03:07,688 --> 00:03:09,440
Greatest country in the world, right?

56
00:03:10,858 --> 00:03:12,818
I'm gonna hold eye-contact
till you respond.

57
00:03:12,902 --> 00:03:14,028
Oh, absolutely.

58
00:03:14,111 --> 00:03:15,696
- Love it or leave it.
- Mmm...

59
00:03:15,780 --> 00:03:18,032
Chowder here, get your hot chowder!

60
00:03:18,115 --> 00:03:20,034
Meg? What the hell are you doing here?

61
00:03:20,117 --> 00:03:22,703
Well, every three years
vendor licenses expire.

62
00:03:22,787 --> 00:03:25,331
So, every three years
there's are-evaluation of...

63
00:03:25,414 --> 00:03:26,916
Shorter! Shorter story, Meg.

64
00:03:26,999 --> 00:03:28,876
I applied for the job and I got it.

65
00:03:28,959 --> 00:03:32,296
Yes! That is the exact length
of story that men wanna hear.

66
00:03:32,380 --> 00:03:34,256
Please pass the word
amongst your people.

67
00:03:34,340 --> 00:03:36,342
So who wants a creamy clam squirt?

68
00:03:36,425 --> 00:03:37,635
Uh... giggity?

69
00:03:37,718 --> 00:03:40,262
Guys! Look at this!
There's Brady in the booth!

70
00:03:42,681 --> 00:03:44,433
God! He's gorgeous!

71
00:03:44,590 --> 00:03:46,049
Yeah, I saw him earlier.

72
00:03:46,060 --> 00:03:48,104
That's right where I refill my clam vat.

73
00:03:48,259 --> 00:03:50,720
Wait, you saw him?
Let me smell your eyes!

74
00:03:50,804 --> 00:03:52,222
Meg, you gotta get us in there!

75
00:03:52,305 --> 00:03:54,432
I don't know. Security's pretty tight.

76
00:03:54,488 --> 00:03:56,532
Oh, I can smooth talk celebrities.

77
00:03:56,615 --> 00:03:58,022
You know, I used to be Eddie Murphy's

78
00:03:58,032 --> 00:04:00,369
late night pizza and prostitute guy.

79
00:04:03,205 --> 00:04:06,000
- Hello?
- Peter, I need two meat lovers.

80
00:04:06,083 --> 00:04:09,462
Again. I need to know if you're
talking about pizzas or prostitutes.

81
00:04:09,545 --> 00:04:12,840
Okay, nevermind. I want two Hawaiians.

82
00:04:12,923 --> 00:04:14,383
And make sure they hot.

83
00:04:14,467 --> 00:04:16,677
I feel like our system
isn't quite working, Edward.

84
00:04:22,266 --> 00:04:23,851
God! This place is so crowded.

85
00:04:23,934 --> 00:04:25,394
Who are all these people?

86
00:04:25,478 --> 00:04:27,204
Mostly step-families furnishing the

87
00:04:27,214 --> 00:04:28,856
lesser house they got after the divorce.

88
00:04:28,939 --> 00:04:31,817
The second time around, you want
stuff that's not worth fighting over.

89
00:04:31,901 --> 00:04:33,569
Oh, here we are. Kids' bedrooms.

90
00:04:36,030 --> 00:04:37,323
Ooh! These are quite nice!

91
00:04:37,406 --> 00:04:40,534
I feel like I'm in the Olympic
village of a not good country.

92
00:04:40,618 --> 00:04:42,578
I like this bed, the Köksavfall.

93
00:04:42,661 --> 00:04:45,039
Oh, sorry. That one's on back order.

94
00:04:45,122 --> 00:04:47,333
But we could get it to
you in six to eight weeks.

95
00:04:47,416 --> 00:04:48,417
Really?

96
00:04:48,501 --> 00:04:50,515
Yeah, the one thing you want is always

97
00:04:50,525 --> 00:04:52,755
the one thing that's out of stock.

98
00:04:52,838 --> 00:04:54,465
That's the IKEA promise.

99
00:04:54,548 --> 00:04:55,925
Sounds like more of a threat.

100
00:04:56,008 --> 00:04:59,762
Uh, I think it sort of walks
the line nicely between the two.

101
00:04:59,845 --> 00:05:02,139
Oh, and there's some assembly required.

102
00:05:02,223 --> 00:05:04,225
- How much is some?
- All.

103
00:05:04,308 --> 00:05:05,434
Okay, give us a moment.

104
00:05:05,518 --> 00:05:08,187
That's fine. I'm quitting soon anyway.

105
00:05:09,021 --> 00:05:11,857
You know, Brian, I just had a thought.

106
00:05:11,941 --> 00:05:14,109
Instead of ordering
all this to our house,

107
00:05:14,193 --> 00:05:15,861
we could just make this our house.

108
00:05:15,945 --> 00:05:17,530
What do you mean? You wanna live here?

109
00:05:17,613 --> 00:05:18,614
Well, think about it.

110
00:05:18,697 --> 00:05:20,491
We could have a different
living room every night,

111
00:05:20,574 --> 00:05:22,076
and a different kitchen every morning.

112
00:05:22,159 --> 00:05:24,495
- I don't know.
- And, Brian, look at that!

113
00:05:25,329 --> 00:05:27,790
A whole array of elevated dog bowls.

114
00:05:27,873 --> 00:05:32,294
Wow! I won't have to lower my face
to the floor like some scumbag cat!

115
00:05:32,378 --> 00:05:33,838
You know what? I'm in!

116
00:05:33,921 --> 00:05:36,131
Excuse me, is this bed in stock?

117
00:05:36,215 --> 00:05:37,550
What? I don't work here.

118
00:05:37,633 --> 00:05:39,468
No, I know. I work here.

119
00:05:39,552 --> 00:05:41,220
I just don't know anything.

120
00:05:46,684 --> 00:05:48,310
And that's the end of the third quarter.

121
00:05:48,394 --> 00:05:51,689
We'll be right back after this
word from your local station.

122
00:05:52,982 --> 00:05:54,400
- Who is it?
- Hi, yes,

123
00:05:54,483 --> 00:05:57,152
we're the family of the people
murdered by Aaron Hernandez,

124
00:05:57,236 --> 00:05:59,446
and we're here to collect
our signed football.

125
00:05:59,530 --> 00:06:02,116
Oh, well, you deserve at least that!

126
00:06:02,199 --> 00:06:03,534
Hey, Tom!

127
00:06:03,617 --> 00:06:05,744
Oh, God! I don't know what's happening!

128
00:06:05,828 --> 00:06:09,331
So, Tom, what was your
favorite time zone to play in?

129
00:06:09,415 --> 00:06:12,668
That was the question you were
fired up about in the elevator?

130
00:06:12,751 --> 00:06:14,712
Oh, who are we kidding?
We can't lie to you, Tom.

131
00:06:14,795 --> 00:06:18,299
We're just drunk men who get
burp-nervous when talking to our hero.

132
00:06:18,382 --> 00:06:21,218
So... 35 and 13 in the play-offs, huh?

133
00:06:21,302 --> 00:06:23,888
Can we call security? Security!

134
00:06:24,597 --> 00:06:26,724
Clear outta here, you knuckleheads!

135
00:06:26,807 --> 00:06:29,143
I'm sorry. I told
them not to bother you.

136
00:06:29,226 --> 00:06:31,395
Wow! Your forearms are massive.

137
00:06:31,478 --> 00:06:33,022
Do you do resistance training?

138
00:06:33,105 --> 00:06:35,774
No, but I do take a
Popeye class at Equinox.

139
00:06:35,858 --> 00:06:37,067
Ha! Popeye!

140
00:06:37,151 --> 00:06:39,778
That's one of the six pop
culture references I know.

141
00:06:39,862 --> 00:06:41,655
I owe you for saving my butt.

142
00:06:41,739 --> 00:06:43,908
You know, I'm in town for a few days.

143
00:06:43,991 --> 00:06:45,951
Maybe I could take you
out for a cup of coffee

144
00:06:46,035 --> 00:06:48,412
while I have a room-temperature
brown mushroom liquid.

145
00:06:48,495 --> 00:06:49,705
Sounds great.

146
00:06:49,788 --> 00:06:52,374
Ugh! Speaking of
room-temperature brown liquids...

147
00:06:52,458 --> 00:06:55,169
I gotta go lady-spatter
the mezzanine toilet.

148
00:06:55,252 --> 00:06:57,254
You see, when vendors
have extra clam chowder...

149
00:06:57,338 --> 00:06:58,839
Short... Shorter story, Meg.

150
00:07:04,428 --> 00:07:06,847
Oh, Meg, I am so proud of you!

151
00:07:06,930 --> 00:07:08,766
A date with Tom Brady!

152
00:07:08,849 --> 00:07:11,310
Okay, now, I know Tom Brady
is my favorite athlete,

153
00:07:11,393 --> 00:07:13,228
but you are still my teenage daughter.

154
00:07:13,312 --> 00:07:15,648
So I'll just say, if he's
doing hand stuff on you,

155
00:07:15,731 --> 00:07:17,441
try and snap up a Super Bowl ring.

156
00:07:17,524 --> 00:07:19,318
- Dad!
- Come on, Peter!

157
00:07:19,401 --> 00:07:21,320
Come on, what? I'm
basing this on you, Lois!

158
00:07:21,403 --> 00:07:22,488
Meg, you might not notice,

159
00:07:22,571 --> 00:07:24,054
but your mom is basically like the

160
00:07:24,064 --> 00:07:25,991
Little Shop of Horrors plant down there.

161
00:07:26,075 --> 00:07:29,036
Guys, it's just coffee. It's
not like we're getting married.

162
00:07:29,119 --> 00:07:31,497
Married to Tom Brady?

163
00:07:31,580 --> 00:07:34,416
Wow! I'll finally have
a son I can be proud of!

164
00:07:37,753 --> 00:07:41,048
Hi, I'd like to tattoo the
word "whore" on my chest.

165
00:07:41,131 --> 00:07:42,591
Getting back at your dad?

166
00:07:42,675 --> 00:07:44,551
You saw the last scene, huh?

167
00:07:44,635 --> 00:07:46,011
Yeah, big fan.

168
00:07:46,095 --> 00:07:47,805
I actually tattoo a lot of pictures

169
00:07:47,888 --> 00:07:50,140
of your little brother
on fat people's ankles.

170
00:07:50,224 --> 00:07:52,434
Oh, you mean this guy?

171
00:07:52,518 --> 00:07:53,811
Nice!

172
00:08:00,776 --> 00:08:02,778
Ugh! I ate so much breakfast fish.

173
00:08:02,861 --> 00:08:05,322
I'm worried I'm not going to
have room for my lunch fish.

174
00:08:05,406 --> 00:08:07,700
I might go take a walk. See
where the arrows take me.

175
00:08:07,783 --> 00:08:09,600
Yesterday they took me to art any

176
00:08:09,610 --> 00:08:11,662
orthodontist would be proud to display.

177
00:08:11,745 --> 00:08:12,788
Okay, sounds good.

178
00:08:12,871 --> 00:08:15,416
I might go pretend write on
one of the cardboard computers

179
00:08:15,499 --> 00:08:16,667
in one of the fake dens.

180
00:08:16,750 --> 00:08:18,335
I like our life.

181
00:08:24,383 --> 00:08:26,176
All right, Meg, you
have coffee with Tom.

182
00:08:26,260 --> 00:08:28,887
I'm gonna steal somebody's phone
order and let them worry about it.

183
00:08:28,971 --> 00:08:30,889
- Dozen for Rajiv!
- Yes, sir.

184
00:08:33,809 --> 00:08:35,936
Whoa, holy crap! Tom Brady?

185
00:08:36,019 --> 00:08:38,230
I, I gotta call my almost deaf brother.

186
00:08:38,313 --> 00:08:39,565
Billy! Billy!

187
00:08:39,648 --> 00:08:42,609
Billy, Tom Brady just walked
into our Dunkin' Donuts.

188
00:08:42,693 --> 00:08:44,027
Tom Brady!

189
00:08:44,111 --> 00:08:46,530
No, no, I'm not gonna
call him Benedict Arnold!

190
00:08:46,685 --> 00:08:49,063
Billy, I'm not gonna
call him Benedict Arnold!

191
00:08:49,074 --> 00:08:50,909
My brother, Billy, thinks
you're Benedict Arnold.

192
00:08:50,993 --> 00:08:53,662
Well, New England will
always be home to me...

193
00:08:53,746 --> 00:08:55,414
is what I've been told to say.

194
00:08:55,831 --> 00:08:57,583
- Hey, Meg.
- Hey, Mr. Brady.

195
00:08:57,666 --> 00:09:01,170
Please. Mr. Brady is my
surprisingly unattractive father.

196
00:09:01,253 --> 00:09:03,672
- Call me Tom.
- Okay, Tom...

197
00:09:03,756 --> 00:09:05,591
So, is it cool being back?

198
00:09:05,674 --> 00:09:07,217
You're like a god around here.

199
00:09:07,301 --> 00:09:10,220
In my playing days, maybe,
but now that I'm an announcer,

200
00:09:10,304 --> 00:09:11,764
it's like starting all over again.

201
00:09:11,847 --> 00:09:15,017
Only this time, I don't have
Coach Belichick talking in my ear.

202
00:09:15,100 --> 00:09:16,143
It's easy.

203
00:09:16,226 --> 00:09:19,021
All you have to do is watch the
game and relay what's happening.

204
00:09:19,104 --> 00:09:21,523
Like if the middle line-backer
drops into deep coverage,

205
00:09:21,607 --> 00:09:24,109
you know that you're
facing a Tampa 2 defense.

206
00:09:24,193 --> 00:09:28,614
Wow! How does a pretty girl like
you know so much about football?

207
00:09:28,697 --> 00:09:30,157
I'm a woman in New England.

208
00:09:30,240 --> 00:09:31,909
I'm required to watch football,

209
00:09:31,992 --> 00:09:34,203
but forbidden to speak during it.

210
00:09:34,286 --> 00:09:37,873
Meg, I'd love to have you talking
into my earpiece during the game.

211
00:09:37,956 --> 00:09:40,125
I really think you could
put me on the right track.

212
00:09:40,209 --> 00:09:42,169
- I'd love that!
- Great!

213
00:09:42,252 --> 00:09:44,630
Then we'll... Ow! What the...

214
00:09:44,713 --> 00:09:47,549
Peter, I got the ring, let's go!

215
00:09:54,348 --> 00:09:56,433
Excuse me. Do you mind
if we try this sofa?

216
00:09:56,517 --> 00:09:58,977
Uh, we're a shoes-off household.

217
00:09:58,988 --> 00:10:00,573
Do you know if this sofa folds out?

218
00:10:00,801 --> 00:10:03,179
Oh, so she wants to put
your mom on a sofa bed?

219
00:10:03,190 --> 00:10:05,901
It's gonna be your bed in eight
months, if you're not careful.

220
00:10:05,912 --> 00:10:08,415
Ah, this must be the dick-ish
baby from the Yelp review.

221
00:10:08,570 --> 00:10:11,824
- You have to Yelp IKEA?
- Yep. It's definitely him.

222
00:10:16,620 --> 00:10:20,249
Well, this team, really needs a
win tonight against the Cowboys.

223
00:10:20,332 --> 00:10:22,209
Tom, give us your keys to the game.

224
00:10:23,919 --> 00:10:26,922
The three keys tonight are
defense, defense, defense!

225
00:10:27,005 --> 00:10:28,298
Then compliment his tie.

226
00:10:28,382 --> 00:10:31,093
The three keys tonight are
defense, defense, defense.

227
00:10:31,176 --> 00:10:32,594
Then compliment his tie.

228
00:10:32,678 --> 00:10:35,180
Oh, thank you very much,
sir. My wife picked it out.

229
00:10:35,264 --> 00:10:37,057
Okay, we'll work on the compliments.

230
00:10:39,434 --> 00:10:42,813
Now, the Vikings' D-line is gonna
have their work cut out for them.

231
00:10:42,896 --> 00:10:45,023
But remember, as Lou Holtz said...

232
00:10:45,107 --> 00:10:47,025
No one ever drowned in sweat.

233
00:10:47,109 --> 00:10:48,610
Excellent point, Tom.

234
00:10:48,694 --> 00:10:49,945
You're killing it!

235
00:10:50,028 --> 00:10:52,656
Now, just do a lackluster
promo for a new Fox show.

236
00:10:52,739 --> 00:10:56,994
Stick around after the game for
an all-new Animal Control on Fox.

237
00:10:57,077 --> 00:10:59,454
Why watch limitless
free porn on your phone,

238
00:10:59,538 --> 00:11:02,749
when you can see Joel
McHale try to catch a ferret?

239
00:11:02,833 --> 00:11:04,543
Animal Control.

240
00:11:12,551 --> 00:11:15,179
All right. Looks like we finally
got the place to ourselves.

241
00:11:15,262 --> 00:11:17,556
- I call top bunk!
- I also call top bunk!

242
00:11:20,017 --> 00:11:21,935
Wow! When the place is empty like this,

243
00:11:22,019 --> 00:11:23,270
it's like we live in a mansion!

244
00:11:23,353 --> 00:11:25,689
And do you know what people
who live in mansions do?

245
00:11:25,772 --> 00:11:27,149
They host dinner parties.

246
00:11:27,232 --> 00:11:29,610
You wanna host a dinner
party in the store?

247
00:11:29,693 --> 00:11:32,154
Provided I can lose
nine pounds by Saturday.

248
00:11:32,237 --> 00:11:33,322
You weigh eight pounds.

249
00:11:33,405 --> 00:11:34,907
I didn't say it was going to be easy.

250
00:11:34,990 --> 00:11:38,118
Finally, I don't have to
be ashamed of where I live anymore.

251
00:11:38,202 --> 00:11:40,495
This is my chance to ingratiate myself

252
00:11:40,579 --> 00:11:42,539
to the movers and shaker of Quahog.

253
00:11:42,623 --> 00:11:44,208
You mean "movers and shakers"?

254
00:11:44,291 --> 00:11:47,544
No, Quahog is leaded with movers,
but it's only got the one shaker.

255
00:11:47,628 --> 00:11:49,755
We'll set it for 8:05, after closing.

256
00:11:49,838 --> 00:11:52,132
Driving is encouraged,
plenty of parking.

257
00:11:52,216 --> 00:11:54,843
Look at us, Brian! It's just
what we always talked about.

258
00:11:54,927 --> 00:11:57,262
I don't recall ever
having this conversation.

259
00:11:57,346 --> 00:12:00,098
Yeah, you know... living
in a store with your buddy!

260
00:12:00,182 --> 00:12:02,517
Eating so much fish you feel crazy!

261
00:12:02,601 --> 00:12:04,353
Yeah, we definitely
never talked about this,

262
00:12:04,436 --> 00:12:06,772
but I'm also having a nice
time. Good night, Stewie.

263
00:12:07,856 --> 00:12:09,468
I bet we're having the best

264
00:12:09,478 --> 00:12:11,902
time of anyone living in any store.

265
00:12:18,242 --> 00:12:19,660
Well, time is running out in this game.

266
00:12:19,743 --> 00:12:20,869
Which is a good thing because...

267
00:12:20,953 --> 00:12:23,622
I just got my period and I
have to get to the bathroom.

268
00:12:23,705 --> 00:12:25,415
It's a crime scene down there.

269
00:12:25,499 --> 00:12:27,459
Well, that's all tonight from Minnesota

270
00:12:27,542 --> 00:12:31,463
as the Vikings hold on to
beat the Cowboys, 28 to 24.

271
00:12:31,546 --> 00:12:32,673
And we're clear.

272
00:12:32,756 --> 00:12:34,091
Great job tonight, Tom.

273
00:12:34,174 --> 00:12:35,968
Wanna come get blackout drunk with me

274
00:12:36,051 --> 00:12:38,720
in a second-tier American city
because we're sports announcers?

275
00:12:38,804 --> 00:12:42,057
Sorry, I can't. I've got this date
with a Victoria's Secret model.

276
00:12:42,140 --> 00:12:44,059
Oh! Are you guys getting serious?

277
00:12:44,142 --> 00:12:46,395
No, I get with a different
model every night.

278
00:12:46,478 --> 00:12:49,064
And I've kind of been hanging
out with this chick, Meg.

279
00:12:49,147 --> 00:12:51,191
But just for her football knowledge.

280
00:12:51,275 --> 00:12:52,651
- Is she hot?
- No.

281
00:12:52,734 --> 00:12:55,696
On a scale of one to 10, they have
to put her on a different scale

282
00:12:55,779 --> 00:12:57,614
because she's like 200 pounds.

283
00:12:59,783 --> 00:13:02,703
Meg, you're missing an
all-new Animal Control on Fox!

284
00:13:02,786 --> 00:13:05,914
And anyone of them could
be the last one ever!

285
00:13:12,421 --> 00:13:13,714
Meg, are you okay?

286
00:13:13,797 --> 00:13:14,923
No, I'm not!

287
00:13:15,007 --> 00:13:17,259
Tom Brady's been using me
for my football knowledge!

288
00:13:17,342 --> 00:13:19,011
And I thought that he liked me.

289
00:13:19,094 --> 00:13:20,804
But then I was listening
over the headphones...

290
00:13:20,887 --> 00:13:23,098
Shorter. These really
gotta be shorter, sweety.

291
00:13:23,181 --> 00:13:26,101
- Tom thinks I'm ugly.
- Okay, yeah, I can see that.

292
00:13:50,854 --> 00:13:53,732
All right. Our dinner party
guests should be here any minute.

293
00:13:53,743 --> 00:13:55,870
Wait. How are they gonna
believe this is your house?

294
00:13:55,953 --> 00:13:57,079
What about the store sign?

295
00:13:57,090 --> 00:13:58,884
I just covered it with a giant banner.

296
00:14:01,511 --> 00:14:03,513
Did you steal that from
the children's hospital?

297
00:14:03,597 --> 00:14:05,390
People know about cancer.

298
00:14:08,810 --> 00:14:10,270
Who's even coming to this thing?

299
00:14:10,353 --> 00:14:12,064
Well, you know Orville Redenbacher?

300
00:14:12,147 --> 00:14:13,732
We got his grandson, Josh.

301
00:14:13,815 --> 00:14:15,484
Also M. Ron Hubbard,

302
00:14:15,567 --> 00:14:17,569
the French president's
bizarrely older wife,

303
00:14:17,652 --> 00:14:19,613
the gal who me-too'd Matt Lauer,

304
00:14:19,696 --> 00:14:21,948
and of course, the
heiress, Agnes R. Thermos.

305
00:14:22,032 --> 00:14:24,367
The heiress to what fortune...
Oh, yeah. I think I got it.

306
00:14:24,451 --> 00:14:27,120
Oh, no. It might be
all white people, Brian.

307
00:14:27,204 --> 00:14:28,288
I think I screwed up.

308
00:14:28,371 --> 00:14:30,207
Well, now you can't post a group shot.

309
00:14:30,290 --> 00:14:32,793
Well, it wasn't on purpose.
Those are just the people I know!

310
00:14:32,876 --> 00:14:35,504
Why do I feel bad for
getting my friends together?

311
00:14:35,587 --> 00:14:37,214
- Oh, thank God!
- What?

312
00:14:37,297 --> 00:14:39,257
Josh Redenbacher's girlfriend is Black.

313
00:14:39,341 --> 00:14:40,759
Group photo, everyone!

314
00:14:45,680 --> 00:14:47,307
You have such a lovely home,

315
00:14:47,390 --> 00:14:49,476
and the layout is so interesting.

316
00:14:49,559 --> 00:14:50,894
Well, every time we go on vacation,

317
00:14:50,977 --> 00:14:52,604
we seem to come home
with another kitchen.

318
00:14:52,687 --> 00:14:54,356
Brian, can I have a word?

319
00:14:55,649 --> 00:14:58,026
It appears the French
president's wife left a...

320
00:14:58,110 --> 00:15:01,780
feces abnormale in the toilet
just off the third kitchen.

321
00:15:01,863 --> 00:15:03,156
- So?
- There's no plumbing!

322
00:15:03,240 --> 00:15:04,950
These toilets are just
sitting on the floor!

323
00:15:05,033 --> 00:15:06,326
You know what? I'll, I'll handle it.

324
00:15:07,619 --> 00:15:09,287
Excuse me. Everyone, hi.

325
00:15:09,371 --> 00:15:11,414
As you're enjoying you endive salad,

326
00:15:11,498 --> 00:15:12,749
just a quick bit of housekeeping.

327
00:15:12,833 --> 00:15:15,669
Feel free to use any one of
the 40 commodes on the premises.

328
00:15:15,752 --> 00:15:18,755
But please note that we're
doing a one-and-done situation.

329
00:15:18,839 --> 00:15:21,508
So only use one that
hasn't been previously used.

330
00:15:21,591 --> 00:15:24,719
Wow! Individual toilets? How fancy!

331
00:15:24,803 --> 00:15:26,930
My grandpa made popcorn.

332
00:15:27,013 --> 00:15:28,348
Yes, Josh, you mentioned that.

333
00:15:28,431 --> 00:15:29,599
Crisis averted!

334
00:15:29,683 --> 00:15:32,227
If you'll excuse me, I'll
go check on our game hens.

335
00:15:33,895 --> 00:15:35,272
Brian, may I have a word?

336
00:15:36,982 --> 00:15:38,710
All right. So it seems that the game

337
00:15:38,720 --> 00:15:40,402
hens I put in the oven six hours ago

338
00:15:40,485 --> 00:15:42,028
are still solid blocks of ice.

339
00:15:42,112 --> 00:15:43,818
Much like the toilets, the ovens appear

340
00:15:43,828 --> 00:15:45,657
to be just objects on the ground.

341
00:15:45,740 --> 00:15:46,950
Well, we could order food.

342
00:15:47,033 --> 00:15:50,453
Uber Eats says Shake Shack could
be here in an hour and 45 minutes.

343
00:15:50,537 --> 00:15:51,955
- Should I pull the trigger?
- Brian,

344
00:15:52,038 --> 00:15:53,623
I'm on the verge of being invited

345
00:15:53,707 --> 00:15:55,917
to summer at the Thermos
estate on Lake George.

346
00:15:56,001 --> 00:15:57,377
I'll be damned if I'm going to let them

347
00:15:57,387 --> 00:15:59,129
realize this isn't actually our home.

348
00:15:59,546 --> 00:16:02,340
Stewie, darling, I hope
it's not an imposition,

349
00:16:02,424 --> 00:16:05,927
but I invited my cousin,
Ingeborg, to join us.

350
00:16:06,011 --> 00:16:08,722
She's just in town for
the weekend from Stockholm.

351
00:16:12,726 --> 00:16:14,519
Bri, we gotta kill this bitch.

352
00:16:18,106 --> 00:16:20,609
Look at us, Lois. Finally empty nesters.

353
00:16:20,692 --> 00:16:22,068
Which brings me to my next point.

354
00:16:22,152 --> 00:16:24,112
I feel we've been
growing apart for years

355
00:16:24,196 --> 00:16:26,448
and I wanna give it a go on
my own down at the marina.

356
00:16:26,531 --> 00:16:28,491
Peter, we're not empty nesters.

357
00:16:28,575 --> 00:16:31,369
Stewie is with Brian and Chris
bent down to pick up his phone.

358
00:16:31,870 --> 00:16:35,332
The only one missing is Meg and
I am really worried about her.

359
00:16:35,415 --> 00:16:37,083
You don't have to worry, Mom.

360
00:16:37,167 --> 00:16:40,670
She's on her way to the Super
Bowl to ruin Tom Brady's life.

361
00:16:40,795 --> 00:16:42,047
How do you know that?

362
00:16:42,130 --> 00:16:43,548
It's in her diary. Take a look.

363
00:16:43,632 --> 00:16:45,217
I don't wanna look at Meg's diarrhea!

364
00:16:45,300 --> 00:16:46,885
No, her diary.

365
00:16:46,968 --> 00:16:48,303
It's like a journal.

366
00:16:48,386 --> 00:16:50,722
I thought diary was the
singular of diarrhea.

367
00:16:50,805 --> 00:16:53,308
So The Diary Of Anne Frank was a book?

368
00:16:53,391 --> 00:16:56,311
Oh, boy! I owe the Museum
of Tolerance an apology.

369
00:17:07,113 --> 00:17:08,823
All right. I'd say she's neutralized.

370
00:17:08,907 --> 00:17:10,492
Let's get back to the party.

371
00:17:11,243 --> 00:17:13,453
All right. So we're just going
to go straight to the dessert,

372
00:17:13,536 --> 00:17:16,122
which is vending machine
Reese's peanut butter cups.

373
00:17:16,206 --> 00:17:18,041
Just take one and pass it down.

374
00:17:18,124 --> 00:17:19,626
Reese's peanut butter cups?

375
00:17:19,781 --> 00:17:21,575
- From Milan.
- Ooh.

376
00:17:21,586 --> 00:17:23,922
- Fancy!
- Matt Lauer loves these!

377
00:17:24,005 --> 00:17:27,467
Italy buys 16 metric
tons of popcorn per year!

378
00:17:27,550 --> 00:17:29,469
I don't have the context to know

379
00:17:29,553 --> 00:17:31,096
if that's a lot or a little, Josh.

380
00:17:31,179 --> 00:17:33,223
Well, I'd like to propose a toast

381
00:17:33,306 --> 00:17:36,434
to our two gracious hosts
neither of whom I know.

382
00:17:37,811 --> 00:17:40,855
Wait. Why is there a
price tag under this glass?

383
00:17:45,652 --> 00:17:48,405
Too bad, Agnes. We could've
had fun at Lake George.

384
00:17:48,488 --> 00:17:51,199
I tried 40 sinks but
I can't wash my hands.

385
00:17:51,283 --> 00:17:52,826
What's this room?

386
00:17:57,497 --> 00:18:00,000
Should've just sat there
and ate your Reese's.

387
00:18:00,083 --> 00:18:03,253
You know, Stewie, I can't talk to
Josh Redenbacher about crypto again.

388
00:18:03,336 --> 00:18:04,838
Should we just call
it and get outta here?

389
00:18:04,921 --> 00:18:06,590
Yeah, I already got the group photo.

390
00:18:11,803 --> 00:18:14,222
Welcome to Super Sunday on Fox!

391
00:18:14,306 --> 00:18:16,224
Tom, what do you think
about today's game?

392
00:18:16,308 --> 00:18:17,392
Yeah, good.

393
00:18:17,475 --> 00:18:19,394
Should be... some football.

394
00:18:19,477 --> 00:18:21,688
Come on, Meg. Where are you?

395
00:18:30,435 --> 00:18:31,936
I'm in.

396
00:18:36,036 --> 00:18:37,954
All right, Peter, we're
coming up on the stadium.

397
00:18:38,038 --> 00:18:39,331
Thanks for doing this, Quagmire.

398
00:18:39,414 --> 00:18:42,292
I gotta stop Meg before
she ruins Tom Brady's life.

399
00:18:42,375 --> 00:18:44,002
No problem. Okay, here we go!

400
00:18:44,085 --> 00:18:47,005
Jump in three, two... Do you
have a lollipop in your mouth?

401
00:18:47,088 --> 00:18:48,757
- So?
- No lollipops.

402
00:18:48,840 --> 00:18:50,508
What are you, the lollipop police?

403
00:18:50,592 --> 00:18:51,760
Geroni...

404
00:18:53,970 --> 00:18:56,139
Why did you let me do
that? I almost died!

405
00:18:58,475 --> 00:19:00,477
Hey, Quagmire, have 'em open the dome.

406
00:19:00,560 --> 00:19:02,312
They can't open the dome, it's a dome!

407
00:19:02,395 --> 00:19:04,105
Well, you've done all you can.

408
00:19:13,698 --> 00:19:14,741
Hey!

409
00:19:18,787 --> 00:19:20,080
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

410
00:19:20,163 --> 00:19:21,456
Oh!

411
00:19:21,539 --> 00:19:25,085
Oh, no, I landed on Bill
Belichick's girlfriend.

412
00:19:25,168 --> 00:19:27,087
She's only a child!

413
00:19:30,965 --> 00:19:32,592
And after this timeout,

414
00:19:32,676 --> 00:19:35,512
the Chiefs are set up first
and goal from the five.

415
00:19:35,595 --> 00:19:37,389
While we have this
break in the action...

416
00:19:37,472 --> 00:19:39,391
there's something important I wanna say.

417
00:19:39,474 --> 00:19:42,060
Meg Griffin, will you marry me?

418
00:19:42,143 --> 00:19:45,230
Yes! Yes! A thousand times, yes!

419
00:19:45,313 --> 00:19:47,524
This woman smells like hotdogs!

420
00:19:47,607 --> 00:19:50,610
Stop! Meg! Don't ruin Tom Brady's life!

421
00:19:50,694 --> 00:19:52,070
No, I gave my word.

422
00:19:52,153 --> 00:19:55,240
And I've always viewed myself
as an honest and truthful guy.

423
00:19:55,323 --> 00:19:57,409
Except for Deflategate, Spygate...

424
00:19:57,492 --> 00:19:59,279
and when I promised my wife I'd retire

425
00:19:59,289 --> 00:20:00,829
and then played for seven more years.

426
00:20:00,912 --> 00:20:03,748
So, yes, Meg, I will marry you.

427
00:20:03,832 --> 00:20:05,208
Is this really happening?

428
00:20:05,291 --> 00:20:08,086
Meg, you helped me
be a better announcer.

429
00:20:08,169 --> 00:20:10,880
The least I can do is throw
away the rest of my life for you.

430
00:20:10,964 --> 00:20:11,965
Aw...

431
00:20:12,841 --> 00:20:15,510
I go to bed at 7:00,
and I don't eat cheese.

432
00:20:15,593 --> 00:20:17,679
Oh. But, I can eat cheese, right?

433
00:20:17,762 --> 00:20:19,639
Nope. No cheese house.

434
00:20:20,765 --> 00:20:22,308
Who am I kidding?

435
00:20:22,684 --> 00:20:25,478
I can't trap you into something
you don't wanna be a part of.

436
00:20:25,562 --> 00:20:28,106
You've got the rest of your
weird life ahead of you!

437
00:20:28,189 --> 00:20:30,608
Thank you, Meg. And I
really want you to know...

438
00:20:30,692 --> 00:20:31,693
Hey!

439
00:20:31,776 --> 00:20:33,862
I got the Seahawks rings, Meg, let's go!

440
00:20:41,244 --> 00:20:42,704
Good evening, I'm Tom Tucker.

441
00:20:42,787 --> 00:20:45,415
Two of Quahog's movers
and its only shaker

442
00:20:45,498 --> 00:20:46,833
were found bound and gagged

443
00:20:46,916 --> 00:20:49,127
at a local furniture
store earlier tonight.

444
00:20:49,210 --> 00:20:51,212
Police suspect Matt
Lauer may be involved

445
00:20:51,296 --> 00:20:53,631
as one of the victims
was his former accuser.

446
00:20:53,715 --> 00:20:55,133
I'm honestly fine with that.

447
00:20:56,551 --> 00:20:58,136
- Oh, boy!
- What is it?

448
00:20:58,219 --> 00:21:00,263
Apparently one Black
person's not enough.

449
00:21:00,346 --> 00:21:02,348
Cleveland's dragging me on Instagram.

450
00:21:05,472 --> 00:21:10,472
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