1 00:00:46,589 --> 00:00:49,029 Okay, here's his diaper bag 2 00:00:49,749 --> 00:00:51,909 and his, uh, Mr. Winky 3 00:00:52,590 --> 00:00:54,870 and, uh… oh. 4 00:00:55,349 --> 00:00:56,630 Him. Hi. 5 00:00:57,509 --> 00:00:59,630 - So how did everything go? - Oh, great. Great. 6 00:00:59,710 --> 00:01:03,229 There was a projectile, uh, throwing up incident 7 00:01:03,310 --> 00:01:04,470 but he started it. 8 00:01:05,829 --> 00:01:07,389 - Well, we've got to go. - Okay. 9 00:01:08,669 --> 00:01:11,229 Oh, right. Um, I've got some news. 10 00:01:11,750 --> 00:01:13,709 - It's about us. - Oh, you and me? 11 00:01:13,790 --> 00:01:15,470 Uh, no, Susan and me. 12 00:01:15,989 --> 00:01:17,350 The other us. 13 00:01:18,670 --> 00:01:19,670 Okay. 14 00:01:20,390 --> 00:01:22,670 We're, uh… We're getting married. 15 00:01:28,750 --> 00:01:31,629 As in "I now pronounce you wife and wife" married? 16 00:01:33,309 --> 00:01:34,309 Anyway, we'd like you to come 17 00:01:34,390 --> 00:01:36,909 but we totally understand if you don't want to. 18 00:01:36,990 --> 00:01:38,909 Yeah. Well, why wouldn't I want to come? 19 00:01:38,990 --> 00:01:40,710 I had fun at the first wedding. 20 00:01:42,110 --> 00:01:43,309 - Look, I just thought that… - No, no, no. 21 00:01:43,390 --> 00:01:46,150 I mean, hey, why shouldn't I be happy for you? 22 00:01:46,229 --> 00:01:48,350 You know, I mean, what would it say about me 23 00:01:48,430 --> 00:01:50,589 if I couldn't, uh, revel in your joy 24 00:01:50,669 --> 00:01:53,309 and I'm, I'm reveling, baby, believe me. 25 00:01:54,190 --> 00:01:56,070 Is your finger caught in that chair? 26 00:01:56,990 --> 00:01:57,990 Mm-hmm. 27 00:01:58,550 --> 00:01:59,949 - Want us to go? - Uh-huh. 28 00:02:49,229 --> 00:02:52,029 This is so cool, you're actually gonna be on television. 29 00:02:52,109 --> 00:02:54,270 I know. It really hit me last night. 30 00:02:54,349 --> 00:02:56,550 I'm going to be on "Days Of Our Lives." 31 00:02:57,589 --> 00:02:59,749 And then I started thinking about all of us 32 00:02:59,830 --> 00:03:02,749 and how these are the days of our lives. 33 00:03:03,670 --> 00:03:04,909 You know? 34 00:03:04,990 --> 00:03:06,550 - Yes! - What? 35 00:03:06,869 --> 00:03:09,589 Carol and Susan's caterer had a mountain bike accident this weekend 36 00:03:09,670 --> 00:03:11,349 and she's in a full body cast. 37 00:03:13,390 --> 00:03:14,469 Yes! 38 00:03:15,909 --> 00:03:17,629 They want me to do it, which is really cool 39 00:03:17,710 --> 00:03:19,950 seeing as I've never catered before and I really need the money, and… 40 00:03:20,029 --> 00:03:21,550 This isn't a problem for you, is it? 41 00:03:21,629 --> 00:03:24,510 - Would it matter? - Oh, you are so great. Thank you. 42 00:03:25,189 --> 00:03:27,749 - Are you really not going? - I'm really not going. 43 00:03:27,830 --> 00:03:29,390 I mean, I don't get it. They already live together. 44 00:03:29,469 --> 00:03:31,309 Why do they need to get married? 45 00:03:31,670 --> 00:03:34,589 Because they love each other and they want to celebrate that love 46 00:03:34,670 --> 00:03:37,029 with the people that are close with them. 47 00:03:37,469 --> 00:03:39,390 If you want to call that a reason. 48 00:03:40,670 --> 00:03:43,110 Who's the bitterest man in the living room 49 00:03:44,589 --> 00:03:46,749 The bitterest man in the living room 50 00:03:48,230 --> 00:03:49,230 Hi, neighbor. 51 00:03:51,830 --> 00:03:53,230 Ross, I thought you were over this. 52 00:03:53,309 --> 00:03:55,069 That has nothing to do with this, okay? 53 00:03:55,150 --> 00:03:56,230 She's my ex-wife. 54 00:03:56,309 --> 00:03:57,710 If she were marrying a guy 55 00:03:57,789 --> 00:03:59,230 none of you would expect me to be there. 56 00:03:59,309 --> 00:04:03,309 Hey, if she were marrying a guy she'd be, like, the worst lesbian ever. 57 00:04:05,830 --> 00:04:07,270 Did I miss it? Did I miss it? 58 00:04:07,349 --> 00:04:10,069 No, no, I'm on right after this guy shoots himself. 59 00:04:10,909 --> 00:04:13,029 - Whoa, she's pretty. - Yeah. 60 00:04:13,110 --> 00:04:14,950 Oh, and she's really nice too. 61 00:04:15,029 --> 00:04:16,629 She taught me all about, you know, 62 00:04:16,710 --> 00:04:19,710 how to work with the cameras and "Smell the fart" acting. 63 00:04:21,230 --> 00:04:23,189 - Huh. - I'm sorry… 64 00:04:23,270 --> 00:04:24,390 - What? - Excuse me? 65 00:04:25,270 --> 00:04:28,550 It's like, you got so many lines to learn so fast 66 00:04:28,629 --> 00:04:31,629 that sometimes you need a minute to remember your next one. 67 00:04:31,710 --> 00:04:33,189 So while you're thinking of it 68 00:04:33,270 --> 00:04:36,189 you take this big pause, where you look all intense, 69 00:04:36,670 --> 00:04:37,869 you know, like this. 70 00:04:41,629 --> 00:04:43,150 - Oh. - Okay. 71 00:04:44,670 --> 00:04:46,869 Oh, here's my scene! Here's my scene! 72 00:04:49,309 --> 00:04:50,469 - Mrs. Wallace? - Yes? 73 00:04:50,990 --> 00:04:53,510 I'm Dr. Drake Ramoray, your sister's neurosurgeon. 74 00:04:53,589 --> 00:04:55,390 Tell me, is she going to be alright? 75 00:04:55,869 --> 00:04:59,189 I'm afraid the situation is much more dire than we'd expected. 76 00:04:59,710 --> 00:05:01,630 Your sister is suffering from a… 77 00:05:07,549 --> 00:05:09,150 A subcranial hematoma. 78 00:05:11,310 --> 00:05:14,630 Perhaps we can discuss this further over coffee. 79 00:05:20,870 --> 00:05:21,950 - Nice! - Yeah? 80 00:05:22,510 --> 00:05:23,510 - Excellent! - Great! 81 00:05:23,589 --> 00:05:24,669 You know, for a minute there, I thought you were 82 00:05:24,750 --> 00:05:26,950 actually trying to smell something. 83 00:05:29,750 --> 00:05:30,870 - Do it again! - Do it. 84 00:05:30,950 --> 00:05:32,229 - You're so good. - Do it again. 85 00:05:32,310 --> 00:05:34,190 - Yeah, one more time. - Alright. Alright. 86 00:05:34,270 --> 00:05:36,909 Damn it, Braverman, it's right there on the chart. 87 00:05:38,589 --> 00:05:40,070 That's great. Alright, I got to get to work. 88 00:05:40,150 --> 00:05:42,109 I got a big dinosaur bone to inspect. 89 00:05:42,510 --> 00:05:44,349 - No, no. No, that's me. - Oh, right. 90 00:05:47,549 --> 00:05:48,870 - Oh. - Hello. 91 00:05:48,950 --> 00:05:50,669 Oh. Thanks. I couldn't, uh… 92 00:05:53,989 --> 00:05:56,229 - Is everything okay? - Um, no. 93 00:05:56,310 --> 00:05:57,549 Huh-uh. Um… 94 00:05:58,950 --> 00:06:01,870 One of my clients died on the massage table today. 95 00:06:01,950 --> 00:06:03,109 - Oh! - Oh, my God. 96 00:06:03,589 --> 00:06:06,469 That's a little more relaxed than you want them to get. 97 00:06:07,429 --> 00:06:08,549 Yeah, uh-huh. 98 00:06:08,630 --> 00:06:11,190 Um, she was, you know, 82 years old 99 00:06:11,270 --> 00:06:15,109 and, um, her name was, um, Mrs. Adelman. 100 00:06:15,789 --> 00:06:16,830 Oh, honey. 101 00:06:16,909 --> 00:06:18,710 Yeah, it's just so strange, I mean… 102 00:06:18,789 --> 00:06:20,589 You know, she probably woke up this morning and thought 103 00:06:20,669 --> 00:06:23,510 "Alright, so I'll have some breakfast and I'll take a little walk" 104 00:06:23,589 --> 00:06:25,950 "and, and, you know, then I'll have my massage." 105 00:06:26,029 --> 00:06:29,549 Little did she know God was thinking "Okay, but that's it." 106 00:06:32,270 --> 00:06:35,070 Oh! Oh, but the weirdest thing was, okay, um… 107 00:06:35,669 --> 00:06:37,989 I was cleansing her aura when it happened. 108 00:06:38,070 --> 00:06:40,989 And when, when her spirit left her body, 109 00:06:41,589 --> 00:06:43,190 I don't think it went very far. 110 00:06:45,310 --> 00:06:46,390 What do you mean? 111 00:06:46,469 --> 00:06:48,469 I, I, I think it went into me. 112 00:06:57,229 --> 00:07:00,349 God, this is so hard. I can't decide between lamb or duck. 113 00:07:00,870 --> 00:07:02,589 Well, of course, lambs are scarier. 114 00:07:02,669 --> 00:07:06,630 Otherwise, the movie would have been called "Silence of the ducks." 115 00:07:07,469 --> 00:07:08,870 Okay, who ordered what? 116 00:07:08,950 --> 00:07:11,469 Oh, I believe I had the half-drunk cappuccino 117 00:07:11,549 --> 00:07:13,229 with the lipstick on the rim. 118 00:07:13,950 --> 00:07:15,750 Yes, and this with the cigarette butt in it… 119 00:07:15,830 --> 00:07:18,549 - Is that decaf? - Oh, God. 120 00:07:18,870 --> 00:07:21,109 I can't believe you're so uptight about your mom coming. 121 00:07:21,190 --> 00:07:23,109 I know, but it's just, it's the first time 122 00:07:23,190 --> 00:07:24,310 and I just don't want her to think that 123 00:07:24,390 --> 00:07:27,190 because I didn't marry Barry, my life is total crap, you know? 124 00:07:27,270 --> 00:07:28,469 You want to talk about crap 125 00:07:28,549 --> 00:07:30,710 try listening to Stella Neidman tell the story 126 00:07:30,789 --> 00:07:33,429 of her and Rod Steiger for the hundredth time. 127 00:07:37,109 --> 00:07:38,190 Uh, Pheebs… 128 00:07:38,549 --> 00:07:40,950 How long do you think this lady will be with us? 129 00:07:41,669 --> 00:07:45,190 I don't know, I mean, she obviously has some kind of unfinished business. 130 00:07:45,270 --> 00:07:46,270 Sit up! 131 00:07:49,429 --> 00:07:51,989 - There she is. Hi, sweetie! - Mom! 132 00:07:58,349 --> 00:08:01,070 - So this is where you work. - Yeah. 133 00:08:01,150 --> 00:08:03,029 Oh, it's wonderful. 134 00:08:03,469 --> 00:08:05,870 Is it a living room? Is it a restaurant? 135 00:08:05,950 --> 00:08:06,950 Who can tell? 136 00:08:07,830 --> 00:08:09,429 Well, I guess that's the fun. 137 00:08:09,510 --> 00:08:11,630 Pretty much. Here, meet my friends. 138 00:08:11,710 --> 00:08:13,989 Monica. You look gorgeous! 139 00:08:14,310 --> 00:08:17,429 Oh, my, the last time I saw you it was eat or be eaten. 140 00:08:19,669 --> 00:08:21,190 - Uh, this is Joey. - Hi. 141 00:08:21,270 --> 00:08:22,630 - This is Phoebe. - Hello. 142 00:08:22,710 --> 00:08:25,070 And this is Chandler. And you remember Ross. 143 00:08:25,150 --> 00:08:26,950 - Oh, hello, Ross. - Hi, Mrs. Green. 144 00:08:27,469 --> 00:08:28,469 So… 145 00:08:29,909 --> 00:08:34,429 What do you think of my daughter in the apron with the big job? 146 00:08:34,510 --> 00:08:35,630 Oh, mom. 147 00:08:35,710 --> 00:08:36,750 Oh, hey. 148 00:08:37,310 --> 00:08:38,950 If you didn't pour the coffee 149 00:08:39,029 --> 00:08:41,109 no one would have anything to drink. 150 00:08:41,950 --> 00:08:44,070 Believe me, sometimes that happens. 151 00:08:46,229 --> 00:08:49,390 This is just so exciting. You know, I never worked. 152 00:08:49,909 --> 00:08:51,870 I went straight from my father's house 153 00:08:51,950 --> 00:08:54,229 to the sorority house to my husband's house. 154 00:08:54,310 --> 00:08:56,789 I am just so proud of you. 155 00:08:56,870 --> 00:08:58,310 - Oh, really? - Yes. 156 00:08:58,950 --> 00:09:00,909 I know who it is you remind me of… 157 00:09:01,349 --> 00:09:02,549 Evelyn Dermer. 158 00:09:02,630 --> 00:09:04,669 Course, that's before she got the lousy facelift. 159 00:09:04,750 --> 00:09:06,549 Now she looks like Soupy Sales. 160 00:09:10,669 --> 00:09:13,270 Pheebs, who's Evelyn Dermer? 161 00:09:14,469 --> 00:09:16,310 I don't know. Who's Soupy Sales? 162 00:09:19,390 --> 00:09:20,750 Oh, my God! 163 00:09:20,829 --> 00:09:23,630 There's an unattractive nude man playing the cello. 164 00:09:25,549 --> 00:09:28,949 Yeah, well, just be glad he's not playing a smaller instrument. 165 00:09:32,390 --> 00:09:34,429 You have some life here, sweetie. 166 00:09:34,510 --> 00:09:36,829 I know, and mom, I realize you and daddy were upset 167 00:09:36,909 --> 00:09:39,309 when I didn't marry Barry and get the big house in the suburbs 168 00:09:39,390 --> 00:09:41,350 with all the security and everything, but… 169 00:09:41,429 --> 00:09:43,750 God, this is just so much better for me, you know? 170 00:09:43,829 --> 00:09:44,990 I do know. 171 00:09:45,870 --> 00:09:49,829 You didn't love Barry, honey, and I've never seen you this happy. 172 00:09:50,590 --> 00:09:53,590 I look at you and I think "Oh, this is what I want." 173 00:09:56,069 --> 00:09:57,350 For… me. 174 00:09:58,590 --> 00:10:00,630 Well, not just for you. 175 00:10:01,150 --> 00:10:02,429 Well, what do you mean? 176 00:10:03,309 --> 00:10:04,309 I'm, uh… 177 00:10:04,549 --> 00:10:06,750 …considering leaving your father. 178 00:10:09,909 --> 00:10:12,029 Alright, tell me if this is too cute. 179 00:10:12,390 --> 00:10:13,709 Lesbian wedding… 180 00:10:13,789 --> 00:10:14,870 Chicken breasts. 181 00:10:19,069 --> 00:10:20,230 Oh, God. 182 00:10:20,309 --> 00:10:21,909 I think I'm going to be sick. 183 00:10:22,270 --> 00:10:25,470 What? It's not like I'm putting little nipples on them. 184 00:10:29,270 --> 00:10:31,110 You had no idea they weren't getting along? 185 00:10:31,189 --> 00:10:32,789 - None. - They didn't fight a lot? 186 00:10:32,870 --> 00:10:35,110 No. They didn't even talk to each other. 187 00:10:36,150 --> 00:10:39,630 My God, how was I supposed to know they were having problems? 188 00:10:40,230 --> 00:10:42,870 You know, in my day, divorce was not an option. 189 00:10:44,669 --> 00:10:45,909 Hey, look who's up. 190 00:10:48,870 --> 00:10:51,270 Oh, I just can't believe this is happening. 191 00:10:51,350 --> 00:10:52,990 I mean, when I was little, everybody's parents 192 00:10:53,069 --> 00:10:54,270 were getting divorced, you know. 193 00:10:54,350 --> 00:10:57,309 I just figured as a grown-up I wouldn't have to worry about this. 194 00:10:57,390 --> 00:10:59,949 Well, is there any chance that you can look at this as flattering? 195 00:11:00,029 --> 00:11:02,510 I mean, she's doing it because she wants to be more like you. 196 00:11:02,590 --> 00:11:06,309 Well, then, you know, couldn't she have just copied my haircut? 197 00:11:07,110 --> 00:11:08,350 You know, it's funny, when my parents got divorced, 198 00:11:08,429 --> 00:11:10,069 they sent me to this shrink and she told me 199 00:11:10,150 --> 00:11:13,069 that all kids have a tendency to blame themselves, 200 00:11:13,150 --> 00:11:15,709 but in your case, it's actually kind of true. 201 00:11:16,750 --> 00:11:19,189 - Ooh, that's him. - Damn. 202 00:11:19,270 --> 00:11:21,829 My mail-order grandfather hasn't come yet. 203 00:11:22,870 --> 00:11:24,709 - Phoebe? - Yes. Hi, Mr. Adelman. 204 00:11:24,789 --> 00:11:26,630 - Nice to see you. - Hi. Thanks for meeting me. 205 00:11:26,709 --> 00:11:28,069 Oh, that's alright, although you did 206 00:11:28,150 --> 00:11:30,549 cut into my very busy day of sitting. 207 00:11:30,630 --> 00:11:33,549 Oh. Um, oh, do you want to sit? 208 00:11:33,630 --> 00:11:34,669 Oh, no, no. Please. 209 00:11:34,750 --> 00:11:37,230 I spent most of mid-morning trying to stand up. 210 00:11:38,350 --> 00:11:40,590 Now, what can I do for you, my dear? 211 00:11:41,069 --> 00:11:43,630 Oh, okay, I don't know how to say this, but, um… 212 00:11:44,270 --> 00:11:46,709 I think when your wife's spirit left her body, 213 00:11:47,029 --> 00:11:49,549 it, um, kind of stuck around… 214 00:11:50,029 --> 00:11:51,110 …in me. 215 00:11:51,750 --> 00:11:53,549 You're saying my wife is in you? 216 00:11:54,590 --> 00:11:56,750 Yeah, okay, you don't have to believe me, 217 00:11:56,829 --> 00:12:00,429 but can you think of any unfinished business she might have had? 218 00:12:00,510 --> 00:12:02,429 Like, any reason she'd be hanging around? 219 00:12:02,510 --> 00:12:04,230 Well, I don't know what to tell you, dear. 220 00:12:04,309 --> 00:12:07,150 The only thing I can think of is that she always used to say 221 00:12:07,230 --> 00:12:10,470 that before she died, she wanted to see everything. 222 00:12:11,230 --> 00:12:12,709 - Everything? - Everything. 223 00:12:13,630 --> 00:12:17,029 - Whoa. That's a lot of stuff. - Oh, wait, I, I, I remember. 224 00:12:17,110 --> 00:12:20,270 She also said she wanted to sleep with me one last time. 225 00:12:28,630 --> 00:12:29,789 Uh, I'm sorry. 226 00:12:30,110 --> 00:12:31,750 There's laughing in my head. 227 00:12:34,549 --> 00:12:35,630 Worth a shot, huh? 228 00:12:40,789 --> 00:12:43,029 Oh, look at this! 229 00:12:43,350 --> 00:12:46,470 Oh, these are all Halloween three years ago. 230 00:12:46,549 --> 00:12:48,429 Oh, and look, here's Barry. 231 00:12:48,510 --> 00:12:50,590 Oh, did he have to come straight from the office? 232 00:12:50,669 --> 00:12:53,069 Oh, no. That was his costume. 233 00:12:54,309 --> 00:12:58,230 See, he's actually an orthodontist, but he came as a regular dentist. 234 00:12:59,750 --> 00:13:01,909 Um, you guys, remember when I said before 235 00:13:01,990 --> 00:13:03,870 "Thank you, but I don't really need your help." 236 00:13:03,949 --> 00:13:05,750 Actually, what I think you said was 237 00:13:05,829 --> 00:13:08,669 "Don't touch that and get the hell out of my kitchen." 238 00:13:09,110 --> 00:13:10,470 Really? Weird. 239 00:13:10,549 --> 00:13:14,069 Anyway, see, I planned everything really well. 240 00:13:14,150 --> 00:13:15,990 I planned and I planned and I planned, just turns out 241 00:13:16,069 --> 00:13:18,189 I don't think I planned enough time to actually do it. 242 00:13:18,270 --> 00:13:19,990 Hey, Mon, you want some help? 243 00:13:20,069 --> 00:13:21,110 If you want. 244 00:13:23,750 --> 00:13:24,829 - Hey. - Hey. 245 00:13:25,669 --> 00:13:28,309 What a day. Oh, I took her everywhere. 246 00:13:31,309 --> 00:13:33,949 The Museum of Modern Art, Rockefeller Center. 247 00:13:34,709 --> 00:13:36,150 The Statue of Liberty. 248 00:13:36,230 --> 00:13:38,230 - She's still with you? - Yes. 249 00:13:38,309 --> 00:13:40,829 I guess she hasn't seen everything yet. 250 00:13:41,590 --> 00:13:44,949 Oh, I'll be right back. She has to go to the bathroom again. 251 00:13:46,429 --> 00:13:48,990 Oh, such a pretty face. 252 00:13:52,990 --> 00:13:56,150 Oh, this is so much fun. Just the girls. 253 00:13:56,510 --> 00:13:58,150 Do you know what we should do? 254 00:13:58,230 --> 00:14:00,309 Does anybody have any marijuana? 255 00:14:00,390 --> 00:14:01,429 God! 256 00:14:04,350 --> 00:14:07,390 Alright, look, no one's smoking pot around all this food. 257 00:14:07,470 --> 00:14:08,789 Well, that's fine. 258 00:14:09,470 --> 00:14:12,069 I never did it. I just thought I might. 259 00:14:13,189 --> 00:14:15,510 So… what's new in sex? 260 00:14:18,230 --> 00:14:19,949 What's new in sex? 261 00:14:20,029 --> 00:14:22,709 Well, the only man I've ever been with is your father. 262 00:14:22,789 --> 00:14:25,669 I'm dicing. I'm dicing. I don't hear anything. 263 00:14:25,750 --> 00:14:28,230 I mean this as no offense to your dad, sweetie, 264 00:14:28,309 --> 00:14:30,750 but I was thinking there might be more. 265 00:14:31,270 --> 00:14:32,309 Oh, I'm sorry. You know what? 266 00:14:32,390 --> 00:14:33,909 I cannot have this conversation with you. 267 00:14:33,990 --> 00:14:34,990 Alright, alright, alright. 268 00:14:35,069 --> 00:14:37,669 I mean, God, you just come here and you drop this bomb on me 269 00:14:37,750 --> 00:14:40,270 before you even tell daddy. What? What do you want? 270 00:14:40,350 --> 00:14:41,669 - Do you want my blessing? - No. 271 00:14:41,750 --> 00:14:43,110 - You want me to talk you out of it? - No. 272 00:14:43,189 --> 00:14:44,230 Then what? What do you want? 273 00:14:44,309 --> 00:14:47,189 Well, I guess I figured of all people, you would understand. 274 00:14:47,270 --> 00:14:49,510 Why on Earth would I understand this? 275 00:14:50,909 --> 00:14:54,789 You didn't marry your Barry, honey, but I married mine. 276 00:15:01,789 --> 00:15:03,309 Alright, people, we're in trouble here. 277 00:15:03,390 --> 00:15:05,510 We've only got 12 hours and 36 minutes left. 278 00:15:05,590 --> 00:15:06,789 Move! Move! Move! 279 00:15:07,669 --> 00:15:10,750 Monica, I feel like you should have German subtitles. 280 00:15:12,630 --> 00:15:15,510 - Joey, speed it up. - I'm sorry. It's the pigs! 281 00:15:15,590 --> 00:15:18,069 They're reluctant to get in the blankets. 282 00:15:19,230 --> 00:15:20,549 Monica, how did this happen? 283 00:15:20,630 --> 00:15:22,789 I thought you had this all planned out. 284 00:15:22,870 --> 00:15:24,189 Do you want me to cry? 285 00:15:25,590 --> 00:15:26,709 Is that what you want? 286 00:15:27,470 --> 00:15:29,069 Do you want to see me cry? 287 00:15:29,990 --> 00:15:30,990 Sir, no, sir. 288 00:15:34,709 --> 00:15:36,630 - Alright, you. - What? No. 289 00:15:36,709 --> 00:15:39,309 Look, I told you. I am not a part of this thing. 290 00:15:39,390 --> 00:15:41,429 Alright, look, Ross, I realize that you have issues 291 00:15:41,510 --> 00:15:43,870 with Carol and Susan, and I feel for you, I do. 292 00:15:43,949 --> 00:15:45,029 But if you don't help me cook, 293 00:15:45,110 --> 00:15:46,390 I'm going to take a bunch of those little hot dogs 294 00:15:46,470 --> 00:15:49,470 and create a new appetizer called "Pigs-in-Ross." 295 00:15:51,029 --> 00:15:52,429 Alright, ball a melon! 296 00:15:52,510 --> 00:15:55,870 Hey, how come I'm stuck dicing when he gets to ball a melon? 297 00:16:00,029 --> 00:16:01,429 - Hi. - Hi. How's it going? 298 00:16:01,510 --> 00:16:03,470 Oh, it's going great, right on schedule. 299 00:16:03,549 --> 00:16:05,110 Got my little happy helpers. 300 00:16:07,429 --> 00:16:09,029 Well, that's fine. Whatever. 301 00:16:09,709 --> 00:16:11,630 - What's the matter? - Nothing. 302 00:16:13,390 --> 00:16:16,709 Okay, everything. I think we're calling off the wedding. 303 00:16:16,789 --> 00:16:17,829 What? 304 00:16:17,909 --> 00:16:19,990 You're still going to pay me, right? 305 00:16:21,909 --> 00:16:24,029 Or something a little less selfish. 306 00:16:24,750 --> 00:16:26,669 Carol, what's the matter? What happened? 307 00:16:26,750 --> 00:16:28,909 My parents called this afternoon to say they weren't coming. 308 00:16:28,990 --> 00:16:30,069 Oh, my God. 309 00:16:30,150 --> 00:16:33,510 I mean, I knew they were having trouble with this whole thing, but… 310 00:16:33,590 --> 00:16:34,590 But they're my parents, 311 00:16:34,669 --> 00:16:36,230 they're supposed to give me away and everything. 312 00:16:36,309 --> 00:16:37,870 Okay. I'm sorry. 313 00:16:37,949 --> 00:16:39,750 And then Susan and I got in this big fight 314 00:16:39,829 --> 00:16:41,669 'cause I said maybe we should call off the wedding 315 00:16:41,750 --> 00:16:43,829 and then she said, we're not doing this for them. 316 00:16:43,909 --> 00:16:45,590 We're doing it for us, and if I couldn't see that 317 00:16:45,669 --> 00:16:48,189 then maybe we should call off the wedding 318 00:16:48,270 --> 00:16:49,669 and I don't know what to do. 319 00:16:52,189 --> 00:16:53,909 I, uh, can't believe I'm going to say this 320 00:16:53,990 --> 00:16:55,549 but I think Susan's right. 321 00:16:56,990 --> 00:16:59,709 - You do? - Look, do you love her? 322 00:16:59,789 --> 00:17:02,350 And you don't have to be too emphatic about this. 323 00:17:04,590 --> 00:17:05,789 Of course, I do. 324 00:17:05,870 --> 00:17:07,390 Well, then, that's it. 325 00:17:07,470 --> 00:17:11,309 And if George and Adelaide can't accept that, then the hell with them. 326 00:17:11,390 --> 00:17:12,549 Look. I mean… 327 00:17:13,029 --> 00:17:15,230 If my parents didn't want me to marry you, 328 00:17:16,309 --> 00:17:18,150 no way that would have stopped me. 329 00:17:18,590 --> 00:17:20,590 Alright, look this is your wedding. 330 00:17:21,829 --> 00:17:22,829 Do it. 331 00:17:25,669 --> 00:17:27,750 You're right. Of course, you're right. 332 00:17:28,429 --> 00:17:30,870 - So we're back on? - We're back on. 333 00:17:31,270 --> 00:17:33,390 You heard the woman. Peel. Chop. Devil. 334 00:17:36,150 --> 00:17:37,990 I can't believe I lost two minutes. 335 00:17:48,669 --> 00:17:50,830 It just seems so futile, you know? 336 00:17:50,909 --> 00:17:52,350 All these women and… 337 00:17:52,830 --> 00:17:53,870 …nothing. 338 00:17:56,469 --> 00:17:59,110 I feel like Superman without my powers, you know? 339 00:18:00,550 --> 00:18:03,269 I have the cape and yet I cannot fly. 340 00:18:05,989 --> 00:18:09,070 Well, now you understand how I feel every single day. 341 00:18:10,229 --> 00:18:13,189 Okay? The world is my lesbian wedding. 342 00:18:24,350 --> 00:18:25,429 Butterscotch? 343 00:18:26,949 --> 00:18:28,070 No one? 344 00:18:28,150 --> 00:18:29,830 Alright, you'll be sorry later. 345 00:19:04,390 --> 00:19:05,830 - Thank you. - Anytime. 346 00:19:09,590 --> 00:19:10,590 Ross. 347 00:19:15,110 --> 00:19:17,030 You know, nothing makes God happier 348 00:19:17,110 --> 00:19:19,310 than when two people, any two people, 349 00:19:19,390 --> 00:19:20,590 come together in love. 350 00:19:21,350 --> 00:19:23,749 Friends, family, we're gathered here today 351 00:19:23,830 --> 00:19:26,469 to join Carol and Susan in holy matrimony. 352 00:19:27,189 --> 00:19:29,949 Oh, my God! Now, I've seen everything. 353 00:19:33,469 --> 00:19:36,350 Whoa! She's gone. She's gone. 354 00:19:37,110 --> 00:19:39,790 She's gone. Go ahead. Get married. Go. Go. 355 00:19:49,550 --> 00:19:50,949 Would you look at them? 356 00:19:51,030 --> 00:19:52,550 Yeah. Can't help but. 357 00:19:58,669 --> 00:20:01,830 How's that pig-in-the-blanket working out for you? 358 00:20:02,509 --> 00:20:03,989 I wrapped those bad boys. 359 00:20:06,229 --> 00:20:07,989 - I miss Rose. - Oh, yeah? 360 00:20:08,550 --> 00:20:10,269 I know it's kinda weird, but, I mean… 361 00:20:10,350 --> 00:20:13,110 …she was a big part of my life there, you know, and… 362 00:20:13,189 --> 00:20:15,229 I don't know, I just feel kind of alone. 363 00:20:15,749 --> 00:20:16,949 You know, I, uh… 364 00:20:17,469 --> 00:20:20,429 couldn't help overhearing what you just said and, uh… 365 00:20:20,989 --> 00:20:23,630 I think it's time for you to forget about Rose, 366 00:20:23,709 --> 00:20:25,030 move on with your life. 367 00:20:25,590 --> 00:20:27,509 How about we go get you a drink? 368 00:20:27,590 --> 00:20:28,949 Okay. That's so nice. 369 00:20:37,030 --> 00:20:40,110 I shouldn't even bother coming up with a line, right? 370 00:20:42,790 --> 00:20:44,269 Hey, mom, you having fun? 371 00:20:44,350 --> 00:20:48,509 Oh, am I? I just danced with a wonderfully large woman. 372 00:20:49,949 --> 00:20:53,310 And three other girls made eyes at me over at the buffet. 373 00:20:53,390 --> 00:20:55,469 Oh, I'm not saying it's something I want to pursue 374 00:20:55,550 --> 00:20:57,749 but it's nice to know I have options. 375 00:20:57,830 --> 00:20:59,550 Uh-huh. That's good. 376 00:21:01,350 --> 00:21:03,070 There's more alcohol, right? 377 00:21:07,669 --> 00:21:08,790 How you doing? 378 00:21:10,070 --> 00:21:11,189 Okay. 379 00:21:12,709 --> 00:21:14,229 You did a good thing today. 380 00:21:14,749 --> 00:21:15,749 Yeah. 381 00:21:19,669 --> 00:21:22,550 - You wanna dance? - No. That's fine. 382 00:21:23,429 --> 00:21:24,429 Come on. 383 00:21:25,030 --> 00:21:26,189 I'll let you lead. 384 00:21:30,630 --> 00:21:31,630 Okay. 385 00:21:44,790 --> 00:21:46,830 Alright, look. Penis, schmeenis, okay? 386 00:21:46,909 --> 00:21:47,949 We're all people. 387 00:21:58,229 --> 00:22:00,310 Okay, which one of us do you think 388 00:22:00,390 --> 00:22:02,070 is going to be the first one to get married? 389 00:22:02,150 --> 00:22:03,749 Uh, Mon, I was married. 390 00:22:04,150 --> 00:22:06,830 - Yeah, me, too, technically. - I had a wedding. 391 00:22:06,909 --> 00:22:10,070 Alright, just trying to start an interesting discussion. 392 00:22:10,150 --> 00:22:11,150 Oh, I got one. 393 00:22:11,229 --> 00:22:14,350 Which one of us do you think will be the last to get married? 394 00:22:17,630 --> 00:22:19,110 What? Isn't Ben in this? 395 00:22:19,469 --> 00:22:20,630 Of course he is.