1
00:00:00,847 --> 00:00:02,058
ALL RIGHT.

2
00:00:02,141 --> 00:00:04,143
I SUPPOSE I CAN
WAIT A DAY.

3
00:00:05,894 --> 00:00:07,271
HEY, WHAT ARE YOU
DOING FRIDAY?

4
00:00:07,354 --> 00:00:08,356
WHY?

5
00:00:08,439 --> 00:00:09,148
I NEED YOU TO COME
TO THIS BACHELOR PARTY

6
00:00:09,231 --> 00:00:10,608
FOR MY WEIRD COUSIN ALBERT.

7
00:00:10,691 --> 00:00:12,527
YOU KNOW, HE'S THE BOTANIST.

8
00:00:12,610 --> 00:00:13,736
OH, GOD.

9
00:00:13,819 --> 00:00:16,239
BOTANISTS ARE SUCH GEEKS.

10
00:00:16,322 --> 00:00:17,865
YEAH.

11
00:00:17,948 --> 00:00:19,283
THAT A DINOSAUR TIE?

12
00:00:19,366 --> 00:00:20,993
HMM? OH, YEAH.

13
00:00:24,913 --> 00:00:26,416
GOOD MORNING.

14
00:00:26,499 --> 00:00:28,833
RACH, I'M HERE
WITH THE PURSES.

15
00:00:30,544 --> 00:00:33,715
MUST TAKE YOU FOREVER
TO FIND YOUR KEYS.

16
00:00:33,798 --> 00:00:34,840
THANK YOU, PHEEBES.

17
00:00:34,923 --> 00:00:35,925
YOU'RE WELCOME.

18
00:00:36,008 --> 00:00:36,967
OH, PLEASE, WANT

19
00:00:37,050 --> 00:00:38,344
THE ONE WITH THE TURTLES.

20
00:00:38,427 --> 00:00:39,429
TURTLES SCARE ME.

21
00:00:39,512 --> 00:00:41,222
I DON'T NEED THAT TODAY.

22
00:00:41,305 --> 00:00:42,432
HONEY, JUST RELAX.

23
00:00:42,515 --> 00:00:44,183
IT'S GOING TO BE FINE.

24
00:00:44,266 --> 00:00:47,978
HEY, WHY DON'T I COME DOWN THERE
AND I'LL TAKE YOU OUT TO LUNCH?

25
00:00:48,061 --> 00:00:50,814
OH, HONEY, THANK YOU,
BUT MARK'S TAKING ME OUT.

26
00:00:50,897 --> 00:00:52,275
MARK?

27
00:00:52,358 --> 00:00:55,653
IS THAT THE SAME MARK
THAT HELPED YOU GET THE JOB?

28
00:00:55,736 --> 00:00:58,364
YEAH. IT'S LIKE A GOOD-LUCK-
ON-YOUR-FIRST-DAY THING.

29
00:00:58,447 --> 00:00:59,990
IS THIS ACTUALLY A LUNCH BOX?

30
00:01:00,073 --> 00:01:01,618
UM, NO. IT'S A PURSE

31
00:01:01,701 --> 00:01:03,453
AND THERE'S
A THERMOS IN IT.

32
00:01:03,536 --> 00:01:05,580
OH!

33
00:01:05,663 --> 00:01:07,415
HEY, SO, CAN YOU
MAKE IT ON FRIDAY?

34
00:01:07,498 --> 00:01:08,499
WHAT?

35
00:01:08,582 --> 00:01:09,584
YEAH, I THINK SO.

36
00:01:09,667 --> 00:01:11,294
WHY AM I INVITED TO THIS AGAIN?

37
00:01:11,377 --> 00:01:13,087
APPARENTLY, ALBERT
HAS NO FRIENDS.

38
00:01:13,170 --> 00:01:15,339
HE'S VERY EXCITED ABOUT
THE BACHELOR PARTY.

39
00:01:15,422 --> 00:01:17,133
I THINK ACTUALLY THE ONLY
REASON HE'S GETTING MARRIED

40
00:01:17,216 --> 00:01:20,219
IS SO HE CAN
SEE A STRIPPER.

41
00:01:20,302 --> 00:01:22,012
A STRIPPER
AT A BACHELOR PARTY.

42
00:01:22,095 --> 00:01:23,805
THAT IS SO CLICHE.

43
00:01:23,888 --> 00:01:26,976
WHY DON'T YOU GUYS
GET A MAGICIAN?

44
00:01:27,059 --> 00:01:29,186
WELL, IF THE MAGICIAN
CAN OPEN MY BEER

45
00:01:29,269 --> 00:01:31,522
WITH HIS BUTT CHEEKS,
THEN ALL RIGHT.

46
00:02:19,904 --> 00:02:22,990
SHE'S HAVING LUNCH
WITH HIM? LUNCH?

47
00:02:23,073 --> 00:02:25,159
YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN
THE HUG HE GAVE HER

48
00:02:25,242 --> 00:02:26,369
WHEN SHE GOT THE JOB

49
00:02:26,452 --> 00:02:28,662
AND-AND-AND
HE'S REALLY GOOD LOOKING.

50
00:02:30,205 --> 00:02:31,499
WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?

51
00:02:31,582 --> 00:02:32,792
YOU DON'T DO ANYTHING.

52
00:02:32,875 --> 00:02:33,875
KEEP IT INSIDE.

53
00:02:33,958 --> 00:02:35,586
LEARN HOW TO HIDE
YOUR FEELINGS

54
00:02:37,170 --> 00:02:38,547
AND DON'T CRY OUT LOUD.

55
00:02:40,299 --> 00:02:41,718
YES!

56
00:02:41,801 --> 00:02:44,762
GUESS WHO HAS AN AUDITION
FOR A BROADWAY MUSICAL?

57
00:02:44,845 --> 00:02:45,971
I WANT TO SAY YOU

58
00:02:46,054 --> 00:02:48,474
BUT IT SEEMS LIKE
SUCH AN EASY ANSWER.

59
00:02:48,557 --> 00:02:50,142
IT IS ME.

60
00:02:50,225 --> 00:02:53,145
IT'S A MUSICAL VERSION
OF A TALE OF TWO CITIES

61
00:02:53,228 --> 00:02:55,857
SO I THINK I'M GOING TO SING
"NEW YORK, NEW YORK"

62
00:02:55,940 --> 00:02:57,650
AND, UH… OH!

63
00:02:57,733 --> 00:02:59,610
"I LEFT MY HEART
IN SAN FRANCISCO."

64
00:03:01,194 --> 00:03:02,864
UH, JOEY

65
00:03:02,947 --> 00:03:05,949
I DON'T THINK YOU GET
TO PICK THE CITIES.

66
00:03:06,032 --> 00:03:07,577
WHAT?

67
00:03:07,660 --> 00:03:09,870
MR. DICKENS GETS
TO PICK THEM.

68
00:03:10,913 --> 00:03:12,039
WHO?

69
00:03:12,122 --> 00:03:16,043
I'LL GET YOU
THE CLIFF NOTES.

70
00:03:16,126 --> 00:03:17,210
THE WHAT?

71
00:03:18,420 --> 00:03:19,672
THE ABRIDGEMENT.

72
00:03:19,755 --> 00:03:21,966
OH, OKAY.

73
00:03:22,967 --> 00:03:25,928
THE WHAT?

74
00:03:30,307 --> 00:03:31,392
139

75
00:03:31,475 --> 00:03:32,476
THE INVOICE NUMBER.

76
00:03:33,519 --> 00:03:34,770
AND THE SHIPPING DATE.

77
00:03:35,813 --> 00:03:37,565
GOOD. ANY QUESTIONS
SO FAR?

78
00:03:37,648 --> 00:03:40,067
YEAH. WHAT KIND
OF DISCOUNT DO WE GET?

79
00:03:40,150 --> 00:03:41,736
TWENTY PERCENT.

80
00:03:41,819 --> 00:03:44,488
OH! I LOVE THIS JOB.

81
00:03:46,532 --> 00:03:47,533
WHOO! MY FIRST CALL.

82
00:03:47,616 --> 00:03:49,118
HERE, LET ME.
OKAY.

83
00:03:49,201 --> 00:03:50,286
RACHEL GREEN'S LINE.

84
00:03:50,369 --> 00:03:51,495
HOW MAY I HELP YOU?

85
00:03:51,578 --> 00:03:52,914
HI. IS RACHEL THERE?

86
00:03:52,997 --> 00:03:54,957
AND WHO MAY I SAY
IS CALLING?

87
00:03:55,040 --> 00:03:56,208
This is Ross.

88
00:03:56,291 --> 00:03:57,334
ROSS OF…?

89
00:03:57,417 --> 00:04:00,755
OF ROSS AND RACHEL.

90
00:04:00,838 --> 00:04:02,047
OH, HI.

91
00:04:02,130 --> 00:04:03,090
IT'S MARK.

92
00:04:03,173 --> 00:04:04,383
OH, HEY, MARK.

93
00:04:04,466 --> 00:04:05,384
Hey. Hey, hold on a second.

94
00:04:05,467 --> 00:04:07,094
OKAY.

95
00:04:07,177 --> 00:04:08,220
It's Ross.

96
00:04:08,303 --> 00:04:09,346
HI, HONEY.

97
00:04:09,429 --> 00:04:10,807
Hi.

98
00:04:10,890 --> 00:04:13,643
WHAT, UH, WHAT'S MARK DOING
ANSWERING YOUR PHONE?

99
00:04:13,726 --> 00:04:15,853
Oh, he's just goofing around.

100
00:04:15,936 --> 00:04:19,565
OH, THAT'S-THAT'S FUNNY.

101
00:04:19,648 --> 00:04:22,777
WHY ISN'T HE GOOFING AROUND
IN HIS OWN OFFICE?

102
00:04:22,860 --> 00:04:24,612
HONEY, THIS IS HIS OFFICE, TOO.

103
00:04:24,695 --> 00:04:27,072
I TOLD YOU…
WE'RE JOANNA'S TWO ASSISTANTS.

104
00:04:27,155 --> 00:04:30,075
WHY DOES JOANNA NEED
TWO ASSISTANTS?

105
00:04:30,158 --> 00:04:31,994
HOW LAZY IS SHE?

106
00:04:32,077 --> 00:04:33,454
OH. OH, MY GOD!

107
00:04:33,537 --> 00:04:35,038
WHAT DID I JUST DO?

108
00:04:35,121 --> 00:04:37,374
I THINK I JUST SHIPPED
3,000 BRAS TO PERSONNEL.

109
00:04:37,457 --> 00:04:38,459
HONEY, I GOT TO GO.

110
00:04:38,542 --> 00:04:39,460
MARK, I NEED YOU!

111
00:04:39,543 --> 00:04:41,169
OKAY, BYE-BYE.

112
00:04:42,170 --> 00:04:44,298
Ow! Ross.

113
00:04:44,381 --> 00:04:46,300
OH, I'M-I'M-I'M SORRY, SWEETIE.

114
00:04:46,383 --> 00:04:48,010
I WAS JUST TRYING TO, UH…

115
00:04:48,093 --> 00:04:50,012
I WAS DIALING ANOTHER NUMBER.

116
00:05:02,566 --> 00:05:03,734
ALL RIGHT

117
00:05:03,817 --> 00:05:05,486
I JUST GOT CHANGED
IN 30 SECONDS

118
00:05:05,569 --> 00:05:07,196
SO YOU COULD BE
ALONE WITH HIM.

119
00:05:07,279 --> 00:05:08,531
YOU BETTER GO FOR IT.

120
00:05:08,614 --> 00:05:10,825
PLEASE. I'M NOT
GOING FOR ANYTHING.

121
00:05:10,908 --> 00:05:12,451
WELL, IF YOU DON'T, I WILL.

122
00:05:12,534 --> 00:05:14,328
WOULD YOU PLEASE GO?

123
00:05:14,411 --> 00:05:15,913
NIGHT, MON.

124
00:05:17,456 --> 00:05:19,082
NIGHT, JULIO.

125
00:05:19,165 --> 00:05:20,333
ADIOS.

126
00:05:29,593 --> 00:05:30,928
LOOK, JULIO.

127
00:05:31,011 --> 00:05:32,722
SOMEONE LEFT
THEIR BOOK HERE.

128
00:05:32,805 --> 00:05:35,182
ACTUALLY, THAT IS MINE.

129
00:05:35,265 --> 00:05:36,308
OH, YEAH?

130
00:05:36,391 --> 00:05:37,351
YES.

131
00:05:37,434 --> 00:05:38,853
WELL, WHAT
ARE YOU READING?

132
00:05:38,936 --> 00:05:40,938
FLOWERS OF EVIL
BY BAUDELAIRE.

133
00:05:41,021 --> 00:05:42,439
HAVE YOU READ IT?

134
00:05:43,607 --> 00:05:45,192
HAVE I READ IT.

135
00:05:45,275 --> 00:05:46,360
NO.

136
00:05:46,443 --> 00:05:48,612
ARE YOU ENJOYING IT?

137
00:05:48,695 --> 00:05:50,447
I THOUGHT THAT I WOULD

138
00:05:50,530 --> 00:05:52,700
BUT THE TRANSLATION'S NO GOOD.

139
00:05:52,783 --> 00:05:55,869
YOU'RE A POET
AND YOU DON'T KNOW IT.

140
00:05:59,623 --> 00:06:01,542
ACTUALLY, I, UH…

141
00:06:01,625 --> 00:06:02,960
I AM A POET.

142
00:06:03,043 --> 00:06:05,212
OH.

143
00:06:05,295 --> 00:06:06,797
SO YOU DO KNOW IT.

144
00:06:10,801 --> 00:06:12,720
SO, UH…

145
00:06:12,803 --> 00:06:15,932
WHAT KIND OF THINGS
DO YOU WRITE ABOUT?

146
00:06:16,015 --> 00:06:17,140
THINGS THAT MOVE ME.

147
00:06:17,223 --> 00:06:20,686
THE SHADOW OF A TREE.

148
00:06:20,769 --> 00:06:23,022
A CHILD LAUGHING…

149
00:06:24,815 --> 00:06:26,107
OR THIS LIP.

150
00:06:26,190 --> 00:06:27,902
MINE?

151
00:06:27,985 --> 00:06:29,904
RIGHT HERE?

152
00:06:29,987 --> 00:06:31,530
YES.

153
00:06:31,613 --> 00:06:33,866
I COULD WRITE
AN EPIC POEM ABOUT…

154
00:06:33,949 --> 00:06:35,909
THIS LIP.

155
00:06:41,289 --> 00:06:43,959
HOW WOULD THAT GO?

156
00:06:53,552 --> 00:06:56,472
WELL, IT DIDN'T RHYME

157
00:06:56,555 --> 00:06:58,182
BUT I LIKED IT.

158
00:07:17,325 --> 00:07:18,494
LOVELY.

159
00:07:18,577 --> 00:07:20,203
JUST LOVELY.

160
00:07:20,286 --> 00:07:21,956
REALLY? THANKS.

161
00:07:22,039 --> 00:07:23,916
JOEY, WE DEFINITELY
WANT TO SEE YOU

162
00:07:23,999 --> 00:07:25,668
FOR THE CALLBACK ON SATURDAY.

163
00:07:25,751 --> 00:07:27,128
EXCELLENT.

164
00:07:27,211 --> 00:07:28,629
I'LL BE THERE.

165
00:07:28,712 --> 00:07:29,880
OKAY

166
00:07:29,963 --> 00:07:30,923
AND LISTEN, DON'T FORGET
TO BRING YOUR JAZZ SHOES

167
00:07:31,006 --> 00:07:32,799
FOR THE DANCE AUDITION.

168
00:07:36,636 --> 00:07:40,182
MY, UH, MY AGENT SAID THAT
IT WASN'T A DANCING PART.

169
00:07:40,265 --> 00:07:42,685
OH, JOEY, ALL THE ROLES
GOT TO DANCE A LITTLE

170
00:07:42,768 --> 00:07:45,021
BUT BELIEVE ME,
WITH YOUR DANCE BACKGROUND

171
00:07:45,104 --> 00:07:46,563
IT'LL BE A PIECE OF CAKE.

172
00:07:46,646 --> 00:07:50,651
"THREE YEARS OF MODERN DANCE
WITH TWYLA THARP"?

173
00:07:50,734 --> 00:07:53,988
FIVE YEARS WITH
THE AMERICAN BALLET THEATER?

174
00:07:54,071 --> 00:07:58,450
HEY, EVERYBODY LIES
ON THEIR RESUME, OKAY?

175
00:07:58,533 --> 00:08:02,329
I WASN'T ONE
OF THE ZOOM KIDS EITHER.

176
00:08:02,412 --> 00:08:03,455
GOD!

177
00:08:03,538 --> 00:08:05,374
WELL, CAN YOU,
LIKE, DANCE AT ALL?

178
00:08:05,457 --> 00:08:06,667
YEAH, I CAN DANCE.

179
00:08:06,750 --> 00:08:08,210
YOU KNOW…

180
00:08:16,051 --> 00:08:19,096
OH, NO, NO, NO, NO!

181
00:08:20,430 --> 00:08:21,765
WHAT-WHAT IS THAT?

182
00:08:21,848 --> 00:08:23,350
SURE, IT LOOKS STUPID NOW.

183
00:08:23,433 --> 00:08:24,935
THERE'S NO MUSIC PLAYING.

184
00:08:26,186 --> 00:08:27,813
ALL RIGHT, I HAVE
TO GET THAT

185
00:08:27,896 --> 00:08:29,273
BUT NO, NO.

186
00:08:30,190 --> 00:08:31,274
HELLO?

187
00:08:31,357 --> 00:08:32,776
HI.

188
00:08:34,319 --> 00:08:36,989
YEAH, UM, LISTEN,
I'M IN NEED OF A STRIPPER

189
00:08:37,072 --> 00:08:39,574
AND I WAS TOLD
THAT YOU DO THAT.

190
00:08:42,286 --> 00:08:43,829
LET ME ASK YOU THIS.

191
00:08:43,912 --> 00:08:47,708
THAT DO YOU DO
FOR THE EXTRA HUNDRED?

192
00:08:47,791 --> 00:08:51,795
SO WOULD I… WOULD I HAVE
TO PROVIDE THE GRAPES?

193
00:08:51,878 --> 00:08:53,255
HI.

194
00:08:53,338 --> 00:08:56,050
OOH! HOW WAS LAST NIGHT
WITH JULIO, SENORITA?

195
00:08:56,133 --> 00:08:57,676
HE IS SO AMAZING.

196
00:08:57,759 --> 00:08:59,344
HE'S SO SEXY AND SMART

197
00:08:59,427 --> 00:09:01,097
WHICH MAKES HIM EVEN SEXIER.

198
00:09:01,180 --> 00:09:02,639
LOOK, I GOT TO TELL YOU THIS.

199
00:09:02,722 --> 00:09:04,433
LAST NIGHT, WE WERE
FOOLING AROUND

200
00:09:04,516 --> 00:09:06,894
AND ALL OF A SUDDEN
HE STOPS TO WRITE A POEM.

201
00:09:06,977 --> 00:09:08,062
GET OUT.

202
00:09:08,145 --> 00:09:10,689
I COULDN'T STOP
IF A METEOR HIT ME.

203
00:09:12,274 --> 00:09:14,276
OKAY, WE HAVE OUR STRIPPER…

204
00:09:14,359 --> 00:09:17,696
A MISS CRYSTAL CHANDELIER.

205
00:09:17,779 --> 00:09:19,240
WELL, SURE,
YOU NAME A KID THAT

206
00:09:19,323 --> 00:09:21,325
WHAT DO YOU EXPECT THEM
TO GROW UP TO BE?

207
00:09:23,409 --> 00:09:25,287
ANYWAY, WHEN HE LEFT

208
00:09:25,370 --> 00:09:26,789
HE FORGOT TO TAKE
THE POEM WITH HIM.

209
00:09:26,872 --> 00:09:29,875
NOW, I AM TOTALLY DENSE
ABOUT POETRY, BUT…

210
00:09:29,958 --> 00:09:31,210
I THINK THIS IS
PRETTY GOOD, ALL RIGHT?

211
00:09:31,293 --> 00:09:32,794
CHECK IT OUT.

212
00:09:35,047 --> 00:09:35,965
"THE EMPTY VASE.

213
00:09:36,048 --> 00:09:37,925
TRANSLUCENT BEAUTY…"

214
00:09:38,008 --> 00:09:39,718
TO YOURSELF.

215
00:09:43,055 --> 00:09:45,141
HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT?
THAT'S PRETTY GOOD.

216
00:09:45,224 --> 00:09:45,849
OH, GOOD.

217
00:09:45,932 --> 00:09:46,683
I THINK SO, TOO. PHEEB?

218
00:09:46,766 --> 00:09:47,977
OH, YEAH.

219
00:09:48,060 --> 00:09:49,645
I'M GLAD YOU GUYS
LIKE IT. YAY.

220
00:09:49,728 --> 00:09:50,813
I GOT TO GET TO WORK.

221
00:09:50,896 --> 00:09:52,689
OH. I'M NOT DONE.

222
00:09:52,772 --> 00:09:55,234
WELL, JUST GIVE IT BACK
WHEN YOU'RE THROUGH.

223
00:09:55,317 --> 00:09:56,485
SEE YOU GUYS.

224
00:09:56,568 --> 00:09:57,611
BYE-BYE.

225
00:09:57,694 --> 00:09:58,654
BYE.

226
00:09:58,737 --> 00:10:00,114
OH, MY GOD. OH, MY GOD!

227
00:10:00,197 --> 00:10:01,157
POOR MONICA!

228
00:10:01,240 --> 00:10:03,659
WHAT? WHAT? WHAT?

229
00:10:03,742 --> 00:10:06,203
WHAT? HE WAS WITH HER
WHEN HE WROTE THIS POEM.

230
00:10:06,286 --> 00:10:09,290
LOOK. "MY VESSEL SO LOVELY
WITH NOTHING INSIDE.

231
00:10:09,373 --> 00:10:12,417
NOW THAT I'VE TOUCHED YOU,
YOU SEEM EMPTIER STILL."

232
00:10:12,500 --> 00:10:14,128
HE THINKS MONICA'S EMPTY.

233
00:10:14,211 --> 00:10:15,462
SHE'S THE EMPTY VASE.

234
00:10:15,545 --> 00:10:17,840
YOU REALLY THINK
THAT'S WHAT HE MEANT?

235
00:10:17,923 --> 00:10:20,176
TOTALLY. OH, GOD.

236
00:10:20,259 --> 00:10:21,969
OH, SHE SEEMED
SO HAPPY, TOO

237
00:10:22,052 --> 00:10:23,678
DONE.

238
00:10:33,813 --> 00:10:36,859
DO YOU HAVE
THE RALPH LAUREN FILE?

239
00:10:36,942 --> 00:10:37,860
OH, YEAH. SURE.

240
00:10:37,943 --> 00:10:39,569
IT'S, UH, RIGHT…

241
00:10:43,615 --> 00:10:46,076
WHAT'S THAT?

242
00:10:46,159 --> 00:10:47,369
IT'S, UH, FROM ROSS.

243
00:10:47,452 --> 00:10:48,537
IT'S A LOVE BUG.

244
00:10:48,620 --> 00:10:50,039
WOW.

245
00:10:50,122 --> 00:10:53,375
SOMEBODY WANTS PEOPLE
TO KNOW YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND.

246
00:10:53,458 --> 00:10:54,584
OH, NO.

247
00:10:54,667 --> 00:10:56,670
NO, NO, NO. THAT'S
NOT WHAT HE'S DOING.

248
00:10:56,753 --> 00:10:58,172
HE'S JUST REALLY ROMANTIC.

249
00:10:58,255 --> 00:11:00,216
EXCUSE ME

250
00:11:00,299 --> 00:11:02,009
ARE YOU RACHEL GREEN?

251
00:11:02,092 --> 00:11:03,427
YES, I AM.

252
00:11:04,677 --> 00:11:05,929
ONE, TWO, THREE.

253
00:11:29,161 --> 00:11:30,287
I'M HURT.

254
00:11:30,370 --> 00:11:32,081
I'M ACTUALLY HURT
THAT YOU WOULD THINK

255
00:11:32,164 --> 00:11:33,999
I WOULD SEND YOU
ANY OF THOSE THINGS

256
00:11:34,082 --> 00:11:35,876
OUT OF ANYTHING
OTHER THAN LOVE.

257
00:11:35,959 --> 00:11:38,128
HURT. HURT.

258
00:11:38,211 --> 00:11:39,296
ALL RIGHT, ROSS.

259
00:11:39,379 --> 00:11:40,964
I GET IT. YOU'RE HURT.

260
00:11:41,047 --> 00:11:43,133
CAN'T A GUY SEND
A BARBERSHOP QUARTET

261
00:11:43,216 --> 00:11:45,219
TO HIS GIRLFRIEND'S OFFICE
ANYMORE?

262
00:11:45,302 --> 00:11:46,553
OH…

263
00:11:46,636 --> 00:11:50,349
OH, PLEASE, ROSS,
IT WAS SO OBVIOUS.

264
00:11:50,432 --> 00:11:53,310
IT WAS LIKE YOU WERE
MARKING YOUR TERRITORY.

265
00:11:53,393 --> 00:11:54,937
I MEAN,
YOU MIGHT AS WELL

266
00:11:55,020 --> 00:11:56,105
HAVE JUST COME IN

267
00:11:56,188 --> 00:11:57,647
AND PEED
ALL AROUND MY DESK.

268
00:11:57,730 --> 00:12:01,318
I WOULD NEVER DO THAT.

269
00:12:03,403 --> 00:12:05,989
LOOK, I KNOW WHAT'S
GOING ON HERE, OKAY?

270
00:12:06,072 --> 00:12:07,991
MARK EXPLAINED
IT ALL TO ME.

271
00:12:08,074 --> 00:12:10,286
HE SAID THIS IS
WHAT YOU GUYS DO.

272
00:12:10,369 --> 00:12:12,788
YEAH, WELL,
IF, IF, IF MARK SAID THAT

273
00:12:12,871 --> 00:12:14,290
THEN MARK'S AN IDIOT.

274
00:12:14,373 --> 00:12:15,791
MARK'S A GENIUS.

275
00:12:15,874 --> 00:12:17,209
WHY? HOW IS HE A GENIUS?

276
00:12:17,292 --> 00:12:19,586
LOOK, DON'T YOU SEE
WHAT'S HAPPENING HERE?

277
00:12:19,669 --> 00:12:21,630
INSTEAD OF HITTING ON HER
RIGHT AWAY

278
00:12:21,713 --> 00:12:23,257
HE'S BECOMING
HER CONFIDANTE.

279
00:12:23,340 --> 00:12:24,841
NOW, HE'S GOING
TO BE THE GUY

280
00:12:24,924 --> 00:12:26,843
SHE GOES TO
TO COMPLAIN ABOUT YOU.

281
00:12:26,926 --> 00:12:28,178
WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?

282
00:12:28,261 --> 00:12:30,139
WHY DON'T YOU SEND HER
A MUSICAL BUG?

283
00:12:30,222 --> 00:12:31,806
OH, NO. YOU ALREADY DID THAT.

284
00:12:33,475 --> 00:12:35,394
ALL RIGHT, LOOK.

285
00:12:35,477 --> 00:12:37,938
YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO
GO THERE YOURSELF, NOW.

286
00:12:38,021 --> 00:12:39,440
MAKE A FEW SURPRISE VISITS.

287
00:12:39,523 --> 00:12:41,275
I DON'T KNOW, YOU GUYS.

288
00:12:41,358 --> 00:12:43,360
FINE. JUST SIT HERE
AND TALK TO US.

289
00:12:43,443 --> 00:12:45,946
MEANWHILE, SHE IS TALKING
TO HIM ABOUT YOU

290
00:12:46,029 --> 00:12:47,697
AND HE'S BEING MR. JOE SENSITIVE

291
00:12:47,780 --> 00:12:50,367
AND SHE STARTS THINKING,
"MAYBE THIS GUY IS FOR ME

292
00:12:50,450 --> 00:12:51,994
BECAUSE HE UNDERSTANDS ME."

293
00:12:52,077 --> 00:12:54,913
AND BEFORE YOU KNOW IT,
SHE'S WITH HIM

294
00:12:54,996 --> 00:12:59,542
AND YOU'LL BE ALL, "OH, MAN,"
AND HE'LL BE ALL, "YES."

295
00:12:59,625 --> 00:13:01,502
HUH?

296
00:13:01,585 --> 00:13:04,381
AND US, WE'LL BE LIKE,
"OH, DUDE."

297
00:13:04,464 --> 00:13:06,175
OKAY?

298
00:13:06,258 --> 00:13:11,347
AND PRETTY SOON,
YOU'LL BE LIKE, "HI."

299
00:13:11,430 --> 00:13:13,974
AND, AND, AND,
"WELL, I CAN'T GO.

300
00:13:14,057 --> 00:13:17,144
RACHEL AND MARK MIGHT BE THERE."

301
00:13:17,227 --> 00:13:18,770
AND WE'LL BE LIKE,
"MAN, GET OVER IT.

302
00:13:18,853 --> 00:13:20,355
IT'S BEEN FOUR YEARS."

303
00:13:23,567 --> 00:13:25,569
HE PAINTS QUITE A PICTURE,
DOESN'T HE?

304
00:13:28,988 --> 00:13:31,283
HERE'S THE SHELLY SEGAL STUFF
FOR DECEMBER.

305
00:13:31,366 --> 00:13:33,410
OH, WAIT, I'VE GOT
SOMETHING FOR YOU.

306
00:13:33,493 --> 00:13:34,577
OH. MARK.

307
00:13:34,660 --> 00:13:36,455
IT'S OKAY.
RACHEL KNOWS.

308
00:13:36,538 --> 00:13:38,457
YEAH, BUT EVEN SO.

309
00:13:38,540 --> 00:13:40,083
I CAN'T HELP IT.

310
00:13:40,166 --> 00:13:41,626
YOU KNOW,
I'M JUST…

311
00:13:41,709 --> 00:13:43,544
I'M JUST CRAZY
ABOUT YOU.

312
00:13:43,627 --> 00:13:45,588
OH, THAT IS SO SWEET.

313
00:13:45,671 --> 00:13:46,840
OKAY, OKAY

314
00:13:46,923 --> 00:13:48,549
I KNOW I'M LIKE
MR. INAPPROPRIATE TODAY

315
00:13:48,632 --> 00:13:49,843
BUT IT'S JUST
SO TOUGH.

316
00:13:49,926 --> 00:13:51,594
I MEAN, I SEE YOU
WALKING AROUND

317
00:13:51,677 --> 00:13:53,889
AND I JUST WANT
TO TOUCH YOU
AND HOLD YOU.

318
00:13:53,972 --> 00:13:54,890
COME ON,

319
00:13:54,973 --> 00:13:55,891
NO ONE'S AROUND.

320
00:13:55,974 --> 00:13:56,892
JUST KISS ME.

321
00:13:56,975 --> 00:13:58,185
ALL RIGHT, THAT'S IT.

322
00:13:58,268 --> 00:13:59,186
GET OFF OF HER!

323
00:13:59,269 --> 00:14:00,603
WHAT IS GOING ON?

324
00:14:00,686 --> 00:14:01,938
WHAT'S GOING ON?

325
00:14:02,021 --> 00:14:03,606
I'LL TELL YOU
WHAT'S GOING ON.

326
00:14:03,689 --> 00:14:05,358
ROSS!

327
00:14:09,529 --> 00:14:11,740
I HAVE BEEN DOWN
IN YOUR STORE

328
00:14:11,823 --> 00:14:14,826
FOR TWENTY MINUTES
TRYING TO GET A TIE.

329
00:14:16,828 --> 00:14:19,539
WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO
TO GET SOME SERVICE?

330
00:14:20,582 --> 00:14:23,876
HI, RACH, UH…

331
00:14:30,883 --> 00:14:32,010
UH, JOEY?

332
00:14:32,093 --> 00:14:33,719
JOEY TRIBBIANI?

333
00:14:38,724 --> 00:14:40,643
LISTEN, JOEY, I
GOT A PROBLEM.

334
00:14:40,726 --> 00:14:42,438
I JUST GOT A CALL
FROM MY DANCE CAPTAIN.

335
00:14:42,521 --> 00:14:44,731
HE'S HAVING A
RELATIONSHIP CRISIS

336
00:14:44,814 --> 00:14:46,108
AND CAN'T GET OUT
OF LONG ISLAND.

337
00:14:46,191 --> 00:14:48,235
SO DOES THAT MEAN
THE AUDITION'S OFF?

338
00:14:48,318 --> 00:14:49,528
LISTEN, JOEY

339
00:14:49,611 --> 00:14:51,738
SEEING AS YOU'VE GOT
THE MOST EXPERIENCE

340
00:14:51,821 --> 00:14:53,532
I WANT YOU TO TAKE
THESE DANCERS

341
00:14:53,615 --> 00:14:55,325
AND TEACH THEM
THE COMBINATION.

342
00:14:56,784 --> 00:14:58,579
WHAT?

343
00:14:58,662 --> 00:15:00,289
AW, JOEY, COME ON.

344
00:15:00,372 --> 00:15:01,540
IT'S EASY.

345
00:15:01,623 --> 00:15:04,834
YOU KNOW, IT'S HAND
HAND, HEAD, HEAD, UP

346
00:15:04,917 --> 00:15:07,296
PAS DE BOURREE,
PAS DE BOURREE

347
00:15:07,379 --> 00:15:09,256
BIG TURN HERE,
RONDE DES CHAMPS

348
00:15:09,339 --> 00:15:10,424
CESSANT, CESSANT

349
00:15:10,507 --> 00:15:12,259
SLIDE BACK, TOUCH,
STEP-STEP AND…

350
00:15:12,342 --> 00:15:14,344
JAZZ HANDS.

351
00:15:16,012 --> 00:15:20,142
IT'S A STEPITY-STEP
AND JAZZ HANDS.

352
00:15:20,225 --> 00:15:21,435
HAVE FUN.

353
00:15:21,518 --> 00:15:23,436
BYE.

354
00:15:26,898 --> 00:15:27,983
HEY.

355
00:15:28,066 --> 00:15:29,151
HEY.

356
00:15:29,234 --> 00:15:30,402
WHAT ARE YOU WRAPPING?

357
00:15:30,485 --> 00:15:33,071
OH, LOOK WHAT I GOT JULIO.

358
00:15:35,448 --> 00:15:37,033
YEAH. IT'S A VASE.

359
00:15:37,116 --> 00:15:38,577
YEAH.

360
00:15:38,660 --> 00:15:40,203
JUST LIKE THE
ONE IN THE POEM.

361
00:15:40,286 --> 00:15:42,623
WELL, NOT EXACTLY
LIKE THE ONE IN THE POEM.

362
00:15:42,706 --> 00:15:45,417
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

363
00:15:45,500 --> 00:15:47,127
REMEMBER HOW YOU SAID
THAT YOU

364
00:15:47,210 --> 00:15:48,878
WERE REALLY DENSE
ABOUT POETRY?

365
00:15:50,422 --> 00:15:52,507
OH.

366
00:15:54,800 --> 00:15:57,513
SO I'M JUST
AN EMPTY VASE, HUH?

367
00:15:57,596 --> 00:15:59,264
WHAT?

368
00:15:59,347 --> 00:16:01,224
SO I DON'T READ
AS MANY BOOKS AS YOU DO

369
00:16:01,307 --> 00:16:04,436
AND I DON'T WRITE "TRICK POEMS"
THAT SEEM TO BE ABOUT ONE THING

370
00:16:04,519 --> 00:16:06,605
BUT ARE ACTUALLY
ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE.

371
00:16:06,688 --> 00:16:09,274
I GET EXCITED
ABOUT STUPID STUFF…

372
00:16:09,357 --> 00:16:11,985
LIKE WHEN MY PEOPLE MAGAZINE
COMES ON SATURDAY

373
00:16:12,068 --> 00:16:14,237
AND THE NEW
"HOLD EVERYTHING" CATALOG…

374
00:16:14,320 --> 00:16:16,114
BUT THAT DOES NOT MEAN
I'M EMPTY.

375
00:16:16,197 --> 00:16:18,200
I CARE ABOUT MY FRIENDS
AND FAMILY.

376
00:16:18,283 --> 00:16:19,284
YOU HAVE NO RIGHT

377
00:16:19,367 --> 00:16:21,244
TO MAKE THAT KIND
OF JUDGMENT…

378
00:16:21,327 --> 00:16:22,412
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.

379
00:16:22,495 --> 00:16:23,746
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.

380
00:16:23,829 --> 00:16:26,082
THE POEM IS NOT ABOUT YOU.

381
00:16:26,165 --> 00:16:28,168
WHAT?

382
00:16:28,251 --> 00:16:31,213
"THE EMPTY VASE"
IS NOT ABOUT YOU.

383
00:16:31,296 --> 00:16:33,590
MY BABY, PRECIOSA.

384
00:16:33,673 --> 00:16:34,466
YOU MAKE ME SO SAD

385
00:16:34,549 --> 00:16:36,050
THAT YOU WOULD
THINK THIS.

386
00:16:39,011 --> 00:16:40,096
I'M SORRY, IT'S…

387
00:16:40,179 --> 00:16:41,390
MY FRIEND PHOEBE SAID…

388
00:16:41,473 --> 00:16:42,807
NO. IT'S…

389
00:16:42,890 --> 00:16:45,101
IT'S ABOUT ALL WOMEN.

390
00:16:46,686 --> 00:16:50,064
WELL, ALL AMERICAN WOMEN.

391
00:16:51,775 --> 00:16:53,235
YOU FEEL BETTER NOW?

392
00:16:53,318 --> 00:16:56,154
AW… YEAH.

393
00:16:58,072 --> 00:16:59,907
ALL RIGHT,
LET'S DO IT.

394
00:17:18,593 --> 00:17:20,345
NO, NO, NO…

395
00:17:20,428 --> 00:17:22,347
WHAT WAS THAT?

396
00:17:22,430 --> 00:17:23,557
I DON'T KNOW.

397
00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:26,685
IT'S THE BEST I COULD
GET OUT OF THEM.

398
00:17:26,768 --> 00:17:28,019
WELL, PEOPLE.

399
00:17:28,102 --> 00:17:30,606
PEOPLE, PEOPLE, PEOPLE.

400
00:17:30,689 --> 00:17:32,566
LET'S TRY IT AGAIN

401
00:17:32,649 --> 00:17:35,026
AND THIS TIME,
LET'S EVERYBODY

402
00:17:35,109 --> 00:17:37,320
WATCH JOEY.

403
00:17:37,403 --> 00:17:39,113
SHOW THEM HOW IT'S DONE.

404
00:17:45,119 --> 00:17:46,746
COUNT IT OFF, LARRY.

405
00:17:59,217 --> 00:18:00,260
DID YOU HAVE FUN

406
00:18:00,343 --> 00:18:01,762
AT THE BACHELOR PARTY
LAST NIGHT?

407
00:18:01,845 --> 00:18:03,096
OH, YEAH.
LOOK WHAT I GOT.

408
00:18:03,179 --> 00:18:04,765
SEE? SHE'S FULLY
DRESSED, RIGHT?

409
00:18:04,848 --> 00:18:06,224
RIGHT.

410
00:18:06,307 --> 00:18:08,977
AND THEN YOU CLICK IT
AND, UH-OH, SHE'S NAKED

411
00:18:09,060 --> 00:18:12,063
AND THEN YOU CLICK IT
AGAIN AND SHE'S DRESSED.

412
00:18:12,146 --> 00:18:13,523
SHE'S A BUSINESS WOMAN.

413
00:18:13,606 --> 00:18:16,067
SHE'S WALKING
DOWN THE STREET.

414
00:18:16,150 --> 00:18:18,861
SHE'S WINDOW SHOPPING
AND, OH, OH, OH…

415
00:18:18,944 --> 00:18:21,155
SHE'S NAKED.

416
00:18:25,117 --> 00:18:27,579
HI.

417
00:18:27,662 --> 00:18:28,789
HELLO.

418
00:18:28,872 --> 00:18:31,500
YOU KNOW WHAT?

419
00:18:31,583 --> 00:18:33,752
I'M GOING TO SPEND
SOME ALONE TIME

420
00:18:33,835 --> 00:18:34,919
WITH THE PEN.

421
00:18:41,593 --> 00:18:43,595
I'M SORRY.

422
00:18:43,678 --> 00:18:45,847
I WAS AN IDIOT.

423
00:18:45,930 --> 00:18:46,973
BIG IDIOT.

424
00:18:47,056 --> 00:18:49,309
A BIG IDIOT.

425
00:18:49,392 --> 00:18:51,394
WHAT YOU HAVE
TO REALIZE IS

426
00:18:51,477 --> 00:18:54,856
THIS WHOLE MARK THING
IS REALLY HARD FOR ME.

427
00:18:54,939 --> 00:18:56,149
WHY IS IT HARD?

428
00:18:56,232 --> 00:18:58,777
WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER
FOR ALMOST A YEAR NOW.

429
00:18:58,860 --> 00:19:02,113
WELL, I WAS WITH CAROL
FOR LIKE EIGHT YEARS

430
00:19:02,196 --> 00:19:04,282
AND I LOST HER

431
00:19:04,365 --> 00:19:06,493
AND NOW,
IF IT'S POSSIBLE

432
00:19:06,576 --> 00:19:09,078
I THINK I LOVE YOU
EVEN MORE.

433
00:19:09,161 --> 00:19:11,039
SO IT'S HARD
FOR ME TO BELIEVE

434
00:19:11,122 --> 00:19:12,666
THAT I'M NOT GOING TO…

435
00:19:12,749 --> 00:19:14,250
WELL, THAT SOMEONE ELSE

436
00:19:14,333 --> 00:19:16,878
ISN'T GOING
TO TAKE YOU AWAY.

437
00:19:16,961 --> 00:19:19,631
LET IT BE ME.
LET IT BE ME.

438
00:19:23,760 --> 00:19:25,512
HONEY…

439
00:19:25,595 --> 00:19:28,014
THAT'S VERY SWEET.

440
00:19:28,097 --> 00:19:29,808
IT JUST SEEMS TO ME,
THOUGH

441
00:19:29,891 --> 00:19:32,101
THAT IF TWO PEOPLE
LOVE EACH OTHER

442
00:19:32,184 --> 00:19:34,187
AND TRUST EACH OTHER,
LIKE WE DO

443
00:19:34,270 --> 00:19:37,148
THERE'S NO REASON
TO BE JEALOUS.

444
00:19:44,864 --> 00:19:46,115
I GOT TO GET GOING.

445
00:19:46,198 --> 00:19:47,659
BYE, CHANDLER.

446
00:19:47,742 --> 00:19:50,787
OKAY, ROSS. LISTEN, THIS PEN'S
GETTING KIND OF BORING

447
00:19:50,870 --> 00:19:52,789
SO CAN YOU PICK ME UP
SOME PORN?

448
00:19:55,625 --> 00:19:56,710
WHERE YOU GOING?

449
00:19:56,793 --> 00:19:57,919
TO PICK UP BEN.

450
00:19:58,002 --> 00:19:59,671
WE'VE GOT A PLAY-DATE
THIS AFTERNOON.

451
00:19:59,754 --> 00:20:01,506
OH. WITH WHO?

452
00:20:01,589 --> 00:20:04,300
JUST THIS WOMAN I MET
LAST NIGHT AT THE PARTY.

453
00:20:04,383 --> 00:20:06,302
THERE WAS A WOMAN AT…?

454
00:20:08,387 --> 00:20:09,723
THE STRIPPER?

455
00:20:09,806 --> 00:20:11,433
YEAH.

456
00:20:11,516 --> 00:20:14,936
YOU HAVE A PLAY-DATE
WITH A STRIPPER?

457
00:20:15,019 --> 00:20:18,690
MAN, I GOT TO GET A KID.

458
00:20:22,902 --> 00:20:25,196
UH, YEAH.

459
00:20:25,279 --> 00:20:27,282
YEAH. WE STARTED TALKING

460
00:20:27,365 --> 00:20:29,033
AFTER SHE, YOU KNOW,
DID HER THING

461
00:20:29,116 --> 00:20:31,828
AND IT TURNS OUT SHE'S GOT
A BOY ABOUT BEN'S AGE

462
00:20:31,911 --> 00:20:34,664
SO WE'RE GOING TO TAKE THE KIDS
TO GYMBOREE CLASS.

463
00:20:34,747 --> 00:20:36,249
IS THAT OKAY?

464
00:20:36,332 --> 00:20:37,542
SURE. IS SHE MARRIED?

465
00:20:37,625 --> 00:20:38,501
UH, NO.

466
00:20:38,584 --> 00:20:40,336
HUH.

467
00:20:44,507 --> 00:20:45,967
ARE YOU JEALOUS?

468
00:20:46,050 --> 00:20:48,052
NO.

469
00:20:48,135 --> 00:20:50,346
YOU KNOW, I JUST DON'T SEE
WHY SHE HAS

470
00:20:50,429 --> 00:20:52,056
TO PLAY WITH YOU,
THAT'S ALL.

471
00:20:52,139 --> 00:20:53,850
I MEAN DOESN'T SHE,
YOU KNOW

472
00:20:53,933 --> 00:20:56,936
HAVE ANY OTHER STRIPPER-MOM
FRIENDS OF HER OWN?

473
00:20:59,939 --> 00:21:02,024
YOU ARE TOTALLY JEALOUS.

474
00:21:02,107 --> 00:21:04,277
I'M NOT JEALOUS, ALL RIGHT?

475
00:21:04,360 --> 00:21:05,612
THIS IS ABOUT…

476
00:21:05,695 --> 00:21:10,241
UH, PEOPLE FEELING
CERTAIN THINGS…

477
00:21:10,324 --> 00:21:12,535
YOU KNOW, ABOUT…

478
00:21:12,618 --> 00:21:13,662
STRIPPERS

479
00:21:13,745 --> 00:21:16,247
AND, YOU KNOW, AND, UH…

480
00:21:16,330 --> 00:21:17,916
HONEY, I LOVE YOU, TOO.

481
00:21:17,999 --> 00:21:19,041
BYE.

482
00:21:19,124 --> 00:21:20,251
WAIT.

483
00:21:20,334 --> 00:21:21,961
WHAT?

484
00:21:35,307 --> 00:21:38,687
WELL, THERE'S A KISS
HE WON'T FORGET FOR A FEW HOURS.

485
00:21:38,770 --> 00:21:39,688
YOU KNOW?

486
00:21:39,771 --> 00:21:40,897
YEAH.

487
00:21:40,980 --> 00:21:43,274
EITHER THAT, OR YOU
JUST TURNED HIM ON

488
00:21:43,357 --> 00:21:46,069
AND SENT HIM OFF
TO A STRIPPER.

489
00:21:50,114 --> 00:21:52,617
IS THERE
A JULIO HERE?

490
00:21:52,700 --> 00:21:54,160
I AM JULIO.

491
00:22:10,051 --> 00:22:11,386
NO ONE LIKES A BUTT-MUNCH.