1
00:00:07,305 --> 00:00:09,013
Dude! Are you trying to kill me?

2
00:00:10,763 --> 00:00:12,721
–Pheebs, I wanna ask you something.
–Uh–huh, what?

3
00:00:12,805 --> 00:00:16,721
Um, well, since I'm moving out
and you're so beautiful…

4
00:00:17,763 --> 00:00:19,180
How about I move in with you?

5
00:00:19,263 --> 00:00:22,346
Well, that would be great,
but then what do we do about Denise?

6
00:00:23,930 --> 00:00:25,846
–Who's Denise?
–My roommate.

7
00:00:25,930 --> 00:00:28,971
–You have a roommate?
–Yes, Denise. Denise.

8
00:00:30,930 --> 00:00:33,305
Hey, what is with the secrecy,
Phoebe? Huh?

9
00:00:33,388 --> 00:00:35,471
And what about this Denise? She cute?

10
00:00:36,721 --> 00:00:37,680
Pheebs, I don't understand.

11
00:00:37,763 --> 00:00:39,555
How can you have a roommate
that none of us know about?

12
00:00:39,638 --> 00:00:42,055
Maybe because you never listen
to anything that I say.

13
00:00:42,138 --> 00:00:44,388
I talk about her all the time. Denise!

14
00:00:46,638 --> 00:00:48,180
Hey, Rach, listen. I was thinking,

15
00:00:48,263 --> 00:00:49,888
I'm gonna have an extra room
over at my place.

16
00:00:49,971 --> 00:00:52,388
–Oh, that's true.
–Why don't you move in with me?

17
00:00:52,471 --> 00:00:55,555
It'll be great. We could, like,
stay up late talking, and watch movies.

18
00:00:55,638 --> 00:00:57,930
And you know
about naked Thursdays, right?

19
00:00:59,971 --> 00:01:02,430
Yeah, yeah,
I think I'm gonna find my own place.

20
00:01:03,388 --> 00:01:07,221
Hey, hey. I thought naked Thursdays
was just our thing, man.

21
00:01:49,346 --> 00:01:51,096
–Hey.
–Hey.

22
00:01:51,180 --> 00:01:54,180
So what did Rachel say when you told her
you were still married to her?

23
00:01:54,430 --> 00:01:57,430
Oh, that. Um, she took it really well.

24
00:01:57,513 --> 00:02:00,055
–Oh. You didn't tell her, did you?
–No.

25
00:02:01,138 --> 00:02:03,180
Of course not.
Because you're in love with her.

26
00:02:03,263 --> 00:02:05,180
I am not in love with her.

27
00:02:05,263 --> 00:02:07,596
She was very upset
about having to move out.

28
00:02:07,680 --> 00:02:09,346
So I didn't tell her
we were still married,

29
00:02:09,430 --> 00:02:10,721
because she'd only get more upset.

30
00:02:10,805 --> 00:02:13,388
I just… I comforted her. As a friend.

31
00:02:13,471 --> 00:02:16,888
–What do you mean, "comforted her?"
–It was nothing. I gave her a hug.

32
00:02:16,971 --> 00:02:19,888
A–ha! A classic sign of love, the hug.

33
00:02:20,430 --> 00:02:22,596
It's also a sign of friendship.

34
00:02:22,680 --> 00:02:24,763
Yeah, not in your case, Lovey Loverson.

35
00:02:26,471 --> 00:02:27,513
It was a hug.

36
00:02:27,596 --> 00:02:30,596
All right, just tell me this.
Did you or did you not smell her hair?

37
00:02:30,680 --> 00:02:35,013
Smell her hair? Well, what if I did?

38
00:02:35,096 --> 00:02:39,138
Ninety percent of a woman's pheromones
come out the top of her head.

39
00:02:39,221 --> 00:02:41,721
That's why women are shorter.

40
00:02:41,805 --> 00:02:44,430
So that men will fall in love
when they hug them.

41
00:02:45,888 --> 00:02:48,055
Come on, Ross, you're a scientist.

42
00:02:48,971 --> 00:02:52,055
I was hugging her as a friend, okay?

43
00:02:52,138 --> 00:02:54,471
It's not my fault her hair got in my face.

44
00:02:54,555 --> 00:02:57,638
She's got a lot of it,
and it smells all, uh…

45
00:02:58,221 --> 00:03:00,096
You know, coconutty.

46
00:03:01,971 --> 00:03:05,680
What? Oh. It doesn't mean
I have feelings for Rachel.

47
00:03:05,763 --> 00:03:08,096
Maybe it means I have feelings
for coconuts.

48
00:03:09,138 --> 00:03:11,846
Okay, whatever you say.
But just be careful, all right?

49
00:03:11,930 --> 00:03:13,513
Rachel's not in the same place you are.

50
00:03:13,596 --> 00:03:16,638
Okay, if the place you're referring to
is being in love

51
00:03:16,721 --> 00:03:21,138
then she is in the same place as me,
because I am not in that place.

52
00:03:22,805 --> 00:03:24,305
Okay, I didn't understand that.

53
00:03:25,846 --> 00:03:28,930
But maybe that's because you were
speaking the secret language of love.

54
00:03:33,930 --> 00:03:35,138
–Hey.
– Hey.

55
00:03:35,221 --> 00:03:37,555
–Dude, some guy just called for you.
–Who was it?

56
00:03:37,638 --> 00:03:38,930
I don't know.

57
00:03:39,013 --> 00:03:41,721
How about, "Thanks for taking
the message?" Jeez.

58
00:03:43,055 --> 00:03:44,555
Hey, listen.

59
00:03:44,638 --> 00:03:47,263
When you move in,
Rachel's room's gonna be empty.

60
00:03:47,346 --> 00:03:49,346
You wanna talk
about what we wanna do with it?

61
00:03:49,430 --> 00:03:50,596
–Sure.
–Okay.

62
00:03:50,680 --> 00:03:52,805
I was thinking we should have
a beautiful guest room, right?

63
00:03:52,888 --> 00:03:54,638
With a mahogany sleigh bed

64
00:03:54,721 --> 00:03:57,055
and bedside tables with flowers
on them all the time.

65
00:03:57,138 --> 00:03:59,763
Then we could have a rolltop desk
with little comment cards

66
00:03:59,846 --> 00:04:01,596
so people can tell us
how much they love staying here.

67
00:04:03,846 --> 00:04:05,971
Whatever, you know, I really
haven't thought about it that much.

68
00:04:07,013 --> 00:04:09,596
Well, I like that idea,
obviously.

69
00:04:10,471 --> 00:04:14,180
But I was thinking maybe
it could be a game room, you know?

70
00:04:14,263 --> 00:04:16,055
I mean, you can buy old arcade games

71
00:04:16,138 --> 00:04:19,638
like Space Invaders and Asteroids
for $200.

72
00:04:19,721 --> 00:04:21,721
The real ones. The big, big, big ones.

73
00:04:23,555 --> 00:04:24,555
No.

74
00:04:26,763 --> 00:04:30,221
Okay, so you mean "no" as in,
"Gee, Chandler, what an interesting idea.

75
00:04:30,305 --> 00:04:33,138
Let's discuss it
before we reject it completely."

76
00:04:33,221 --> 00:04:35,471
Oh. I'm sorry. Of course.

77
00:04:37,138 --> 00:04:40,221
Yes. Interesting idea,
um, talk about it, but no.

78
00:04:41,721 --> 00:04:42,971
So that's it?

79
00:04:43,055 --> 00:04:46,805
Well, I just don't think that arcade games
go in the beautiful guest room.

80
00:04:46,888 --> 00:04:49,346
The beautiful guest room's
gonna be filled with antiques.

81
00:04:49,430 --> 00:04:52,388
Which is why Asteroids is perfect.
It's the oldest game.

82
00:04:55,013 --> 00:04:56,805
What do you have
against the beautiful guest room?

83
00:04:56,888 --> 00:04:59,013
Nothing. I don't have anything
against the beautiful guest room.

84
00:04:59,096 --> 00:05:02,971
Especially since everybody that we know
lives about 30 seconds away.

85
00:05:04,430 --> 00:05:05,430
Are you mocking me?

86
00:05:05,513 --> 00:05:08,180
No, I'm not mocking you
or your beautiful guest room.

87
00:05:13,721 --> 00:05:15,430
Hey. What's up?

88
00:05:15,513 --> 00:05:17,596
Nothing. Monica and I had a stupid fight.

89
00:05:17,680 --> 00:05:19,680
But you're still moving in
together, right?

90
00:05:19,763 --> 00:05:21,263
Because my ad came out today.

91
00:05:22,305 --> 00:05:25,763
`'Wanted, female roommate,
nonsmoker, nonugly."

92
00:05:28,638 --> 00:05:30,096
–Nice.
–Eh?

93
00:05:30,180 --> 00:05:32,346
I just figured after living with you,

94
00:05:32,430 --> 00:05:34,930
it'd be an interesting change of pace
to have a female roommate.

95
00:05:35,013 --> 00:05:38,805
You know? Someone I could learn from.
Someone who's different than me.

96
00:05:38,888 --> 00:05:42,680
And what's more different than me,
a guy who's not 19,

97
00:05:42,763 --> 00:05:45,263
than, say, a girl who is 19?

98
00:05:45,346 --> 00:05:46,930
Ah?

99
00:05:47,013 --> 00:05:49,305
Not just a hat rack, my friend.

100
00:05:51,388 --> 00:05:54,805
–Pheebs, I have to ask you––
–Shh. I'm swamped right now.

101
00:05:56,430 --> 00:05:58,721
You're just staring into space.

102
00:05:58,805 --> 00:06:02,180
Um, I'm trying to move that pencil.

103
00:06:02,846 --> 00:06:05,180
–This one?
–It worked!

104
00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:10,221
Pheebs, this whole apartment thing
is a nightmare.

105
00:06:10,305 --> 00:06:13,346
Every place that I can afford
comes with a roommate who is a freak.

106
00:06:13,430 --> 00:06:14,638
–Look at this.
–Mmm.

107
00:06:14,721 --> 00:06:19,888
"Wanted, female roommate,
nonsmoker, non–ugly."

108
00:06:22,596 --> 00:06:25,305
It's just, there's nothing.
This city is full.

109
00:06:25,388 --> 00:06:26,430
Wait, no, look at this.

110
00:06:26,513 --> 00:06:29,013
"Two–bedroom, two–bath.
Must be nonsmoker.

111
00:06:29,096 --> 00:06:31,013
Satan worshipers okay."

112
00:06:32,680 --> 00:06:35,180
Oh. Yeah, but it's on the ground floor.

113
00:06:36,930 --> 00:06:38,763
–Hey.
– Hey.

114
00:06:38,846 --> 00:06:42,055
–Rach, are you still looking for a place?
–Yeah, why?

115
00:06:42,138 --> 00:06:44,346
Okay, there's this guy Warren
from the museum,

116
00:06:44,430 --> 00:06:46,680
and he's going on a dig
for like two years.

117
00:06:46,763 --> 00:06:49,680
And he's got this great place
he needs to sublet.

118
00:06:49,763 --> 00:06:51,305
So, uh, you interested?

119
00:06:51,388 --> 00:06:54,888
That sounds great. I'd love to live
at Warren's. I love Warren.

120
00:06:54,971 --> 00:06:57,471
–Thank you.
–Oh, don't thank me.

121
00:06:57,555 --> 00:06:58,596
You wanna thank someone,

122
00:06:58,680 --> 00:07:01,555
thank the volcano that erupted
thousands of years ago

123
00:07:01,638 --> 00:07:05,346
killing but perfectly preserving
an entire civilization.

124
00:07:06,971 --> 00:07:08,513
Here's Warren's number.

125
00:07:09,638 --> 00:07:12,430
Oh, this is great.
I am gonna call him right now.

126
00:07:12,513 --> 00:07:14,555
–Oh, okay. Oh.
–Thank you.

127
00:07:16,971 --> 00:07:19,471
Okay, you go call him.

128
00:07:20,638 --> 00:07:21,721
I saw it.

129
00:07:23,388 --> 00:07:25,596
I don't know what you're talking about.

130
00:07:25,680 --> 00:07:28,721
I'm talking about that
which you already know but won't admit.

131
00:07:28,805 --> 00:07:31,430
You know, that you love her again.
You relove her.

132
00:07:32,055 --> 00:07:34,346
Look, I do not relove her.

133
00:07:34,430 --> 00:07:36,555
I can't believe you won't just admit it.

134
00:07:38,096 --> 00:07:40,971
Okay, just promise me
that you won't do anything stupid.

135
00:07:41,055 --> 00:07:45,096
Look, we're just friends now, okay.
Why would I do anything stupid?

136
00:07:45,180 --> 00:07:48,388
Well, the apartment
is already subletted.

137
00:07:48,471 --> 00:07:51,555
I mean, this is just hopeless.
I'm never gonna find anything.

138
00:07:52,346 --> 00:07:53,346
You can live with me.

139
00:07:53,471 --> 00:07:54,763
–What?
–What?

140
00:07:56,555 --> 00:07:57,680
What?

141
00:08:02,596 --> 00:08:05,138
– Oh, my God, are you serious?
–Uh–huh.

142
00:08:06,680 --> 00:08:09,805
I would love to live with you, Ross.
That's great. Thank you.

143
00:08:09,888 --> 00:08:12,430
I'm just glad I could,
you know, help you out.

144
00:08:14,221 --> 00:08:18,846
Wow, I'm so happy for you guys.
This is so, so not stupid.

145
00:08:21,555 --> 00:08:23,971
Ross, Ross, you have no idea
what this means to me.

146
00:08:24,055 --> 00:08:28,513
I mean, I was gonna be homeless.
You've just saved me. You're my hero.

147
00:08:29,763 --> 00:08:32,305
Hero? I don't know. Well, all right.

148
00:08:33,221 --> 00:08:37,138
Oh, I have to go tell Monica
what a wonderful brother she has.

149
00:08:37,221 --> 00:08:40,513
–Aw. Mwah.
–Oh, please.

150
00:08:47,013 --> 00:08:49,055
You're gonna say things now, aren't you?

151
00:08:50,680 --> 00:08:52,346
No. No, I won't.

152
00:08:53,055 --> 00:08:55,013
But I should tell you this.

153
00:08:55,096 --> 00:08:57,971
This exact same thing happened
to my roommate, Denise.

154
00:08:58,055 --> 00:09:00,513
She moved in with a guy
who was secretly married to her

155
00:09:00,596 --> 00:09:02,888
and he said he didn't love her
but he really did.

156
00:09:02,971 --> 00:09:04,430
And it just blew up.

157
00:09:04,513 --> 00:09:07,263
And that's how she ended up
living with me.

158
00:09:10,263 --> 00:09:11,638
Okay, that's a lie.

159
00:09:15,763 --> 00:09:17,305
–Hi.
–Hi.

160
00:09:17,388 --> 00:09:20,805
Hi. Listen, I'm sorry about before.
I don't need to have a game room.

161
00:09:20,888 --> 00:09:24,221
When I was a kid, I only played
those games because I couldn't get girls.

162
00:09:24,305 --> 00:09:25,346
And now I can get…

163
00:09:27,138 --> 00:09:28,388
Now, I have you.

164
00:09:29,971 --> 00:09:32,221
No, not that I think that I have you

165
00:09:32,305 --> 00:09:35,513
or think of you as property
in any sort of way.

166
00:09:35,596 --> 00:09:37,721
–I see women––
–Stop it, Chandler.

167
00:09:39,430 --> 00:09:40,930
I'm sorry too.

168
00:09:41,846 --> 00:09:44,513
–Really?
–Yeah. Oh, yes.

169
00:09:44,596 --> 00:09:45,680
Oh.

170
00:09:45,763 --> 00:09:47,971
Listen, we don't have to make that
a guest room.

171
00:09:48,055 --> 00:09:49,805
We can think of something
to do with the room together.

172
00:09:49,888 --> 00:09:50,971
That's a great idea.

173
00:09:51,055 --> 00:09:53,846
We can easily think of a way
for us both to enjoy the room.

174
00:09:53,930 --> 00:09:55,221
Totally.

175
00:10:00,680 --> 00:10:02,888
–We don't have to come up with this now.
–Oh, good.

176
00:10:03,930 --> 00:10:05,513
Hey, you know what?
Why don't we think about changes

177
00:10:05,596 --> 00:10:06,846
that we can make in the living room?

178
00:10:07,305 --> 00:10:08,305
Changes?

179
00:10:09,388 --> 00:10:11,513
Yeah, I mean, we're gonna have to
move around some furniture

180
00:10:11,596 --> 00:10:12,638
to make room for my chair.

181
00:10:15,471 --> 00:10:17,638
You're gonna bring the BarcaLounger
over here?

182
00:10:18,221 --> 00:10:20,430
–Is that a problem?
–Well…

183
00:10:21,263 --> 00:10:24,555
It's just that they're a set
and they should probably stay together.

184
00:10:24,638 --> 00:10:26,763
Oh, that's cool.
Then I'll just bring them both over.

185
00:10:27,763 --> 00:10:30,596
See, now you're taking them away
from their home.

186
00:10:31,430 --> 00:10:35,555
Okay, I get it. So I get nothing.
Nothing here is mine. Everything is yours.

187
00:10:35,638 --> 00:10:38,555
I'll get up in the morning,
put on your clothes, and head off to work.

188
00:10:39,180 --> 00:10:41,680
Yeah. Yeah, you know what?
That's it. That's it.

189
00:10:41,763 --> 00:10:44,096
Everything will be mine.
Nothing will be yours. That's what I said.

190
00:10:44,180 --> 00:10:46,471
Oh, come on, Chandler.
I'm talking about the BarcaLounger.

191
00:10:46,555 --> 00:10:48,805
It doesn't match. Where is it gonna go?

192
00:10:48,888 --> 00:10:50,680
In the game room.

193
00:10:50,763 --> 00:10:54,221
Look, it is not my fault
that your chairs are incredibly ugly.

194
00:10:54,305 --> 00:10:55,971
All right, that's fine. That's fine.

195
00:10:56,055 --> 00:10:58,346
I won't bring over the chairs.
I won't bring anything over.

196
00:10:58,430 --> 00:11:01,430
I wouldn't wanna ruin the ambiance
over here at Grandma's place!

197
00:11:04,096 --> 00:11:06,555
Everything on your application
looks really good.

198
00:11:06,638 --> 00:11:08,555
Oh, just one last question.

199
00:11:08,638 --> 00:11:10,471
Are you and your friends
gonna be over here all the time,

200
00:11:10,555 --> 00:11:11,971
like, partying and hanging out?

201
00:11:12,055 --> 00:11:14,096
Oh, don't worry.
I'm not really a party girl.

202
00:11:14,180 --> 00:11:15,305
Whoa.

203
00:11:16,721 --> 00:11:19,763
Now, don't just be blurting stuff out.

204
00:11:19,846 --> 00:11:22,305
I want you to really think
about your answers.

205
00:11:24,096 --> 00:11:28,138
You can call off the roommate search.
Hi. I'll be living here.

206
00:11:28,221 --> 00:11:29,555
Oh, don't listen to him.

207
00:11:29,638 --> 00:11:31,971
He's just some guy
who really wants the apartment

208
00:11:32,055 --> 00:11:33,596
but I don't think he's gonna get it.

209
00:11:34,763 --> 00:11:36,513
Why did you take
the shower curtain down?

210
00:11:37,180 --> 00:11:38,763
That thing was a hazard.

211
00:11:40,096 --> 00:11:41,721
I'm very safety–conscious.

212
00:11:50,013 --> 00:11:52,221
–Hey.
–Hey.

213
00:11:52,305 --> 00:11:54,680
Oh, I was just clearing some space
for your stuff.

214
00:11:54,763 --> 00:11:55,930
Oh, thanks.

215
00:11:56,013 --> 00:11:57,596
But listen, I was just at Monica's

216
00:11:57,680 --> 00:12:01,055
and she and Chandler had a big fight
and they're not moving in.

217
00:12:01,138 --> 00:12:04,888
What do you mean, not moving in?
They're still moving in, right?

218
00:12:05,888 --> 00:12:10,055
No, no, they just had a big blowout
over what to do with my room.

219
00:12:10,138 --> 00:12:12,305
What? Over a stupid room?

220
00:12:12,971 --> 00:12:14,430
I know. I feel kind of bad for them

221
00:12:14,513 --> 00:12:17,513
but I'm also really psyched
because now I don't have to move in here.

222
00:12:17,596 --> 00:12:20,221
Oh, no. Yeah. No, that part's great.

223
00:12:22,471 --> 00:12:24,763
What's all this about you guys fighting?

224
00:12:26,263 --> 00:12:28,680
Is this really over a room?

225
00:12:28,763 --> 00:12:31,263
I mean, that is so silly.

226
00:12:32,805 --> 00:12:36,013
–Ross, we can handle this.
–Well, apparently not.

227
00:12:36,096 --> 00:12:38,638
And I can't just stand by

228
00:12:38,721 --> 00:12:41,305
and watch two people I care about so much

229
00:12:41,388 --> 00:12:44,555
be hurt by something that is so silly.

230
00:12:47,013 --> 00:12:50,055
I mean, enough of the silliness.

231
00:12:50,138 --> 00:12:51,846
Why don't you tell her
to stop being silly?

232
00:12:53,596 --> 00:12:55,055
Okay, okay.

233
00:12:57,555 --> 00:12:59,596
Two very good points.

234
00:13:01,221 --> 00:13:04,638
Look, I've known you both a long time.

235
00:13:04,721 --> 00:13:08,430
And I've never seen either of you
one–millionth as happy

236
00:13:08,513 --> 00:13:10,763
as you've been since you got together.

237
00:13:11,471 --> 00:13:15,763
Do you really wanna throw that all away
over a room?

238
00:13:15,846 --> 00:13:17,596
That is so silly.

239
00:13:18,888 --> 00:13:20,555
I mean, what's more important,

240
00:13:20,638 --> 00:13:23,596
love or silliness?

241
00:13:25,221 --> 00:13:28,221
Well, we are fond of the silliness.

242
00:13:28,305 --> 00:13:30,721
But we also have a soft spot for the love.

243
00:13:31,638 --> 00:13:34,263
–Love is the best medicine.
–That's laughter.

244
00:13:34,346 --> 00:13:35,471
–Why do you do it?
–I don't know.

245
00:13:35,555 --> 00:13:36,638
Okay, all right…

246
00:13:40,846 --> 00:13:45,180
Now, Chandler,
you wanna live with Monica, right?

247
00:13:46,430 --> 00:13:47,930
Yeah, I do.

248
00:13:48,013 --> 00:13:50,513
And, Mon, you wanna live with Chandler,
don't you?

249
00:13:50,596 --> 00:13:51,763
Yes.

250
00:13:51,846 --> 00:13:54,930
Good. A verbal contract is binding
in the state of New York.

251
00:14:04,555 --> 00:14:07,471
So I understand
you're looking for a place?

252
00:14:09,513 --> 00:14:12,680
–No, no, I'm staying put.
–Oh.

253
00:14:14,346 --> 00:14:17,805
I was going to offer you my apartment.

254
00:14:18,763 --> 00:14:20,555
Why? Where are you going?

255
00:14:21,721 --> 00:14:23,096
I don't know.

256
00:14:25,555 --> 00:14:28,180
–Hey, Rach.
–Hi.

257
00:14:28,263 --> 00:14:31,805
Uh, you're never gonna believe it.
Monica and Chandler are moving in again.

258
00:14:31,888 --> 00:14:35,305
That's great news, right?
I mean, for them, right?

259
00:14:35,888 --> 00:14:37,263
Oh, wow.

260
00:14:37,346 --> 00:14:39,888
But on the bright side,
we get to be roommates again.

261
00:14:41,263 --> 00:14:44,846
Yeah. You know, about that, um…

262
00:14:45,721 --> 00:14:47,305
Ross, I…

263
00:14:47,388 --> 00:14:50,721
I really appreciate your offer
to let me move in and everything

264
00:14:50,805 --> 00:14:52,763
but don't you think
it's gonna be weird?

265
00:14:54,096 --> 00:14:58,721
Why? Why? Why would it…
Why would it be weird?

266
00:14:58,805 --> 00:15:01,888
Well, you know, because of us.

267
00:15:01,971 --> 00:15:03,805
Because of our history.

268
00:15:04,680 --> 00:15:06,263
–No.
– No?

269
00:15:06,346 --> 00:15:08,471
No, no.

270
00:15:08,555 --> 00:15:12,013
It would only be weird
if we were still in that place.

271
00:15:12,096 --> 00:15:15,721
I mean, are you still in that place?

272
00:15:15,805 --> 00:15:19,013
–No, not at all.
–Good. Me neither.

273
00:15:19,096 --> 00:15:20,930
So it's not a problem.

274
00:15:21,013 --> 00:15:24,471
We're just two friends
who happen to be roommates.

275
00:15:24,555 --> 00:15:28,055
Okay, but, Ross, eventually,
you and I are gonna be dating.

276
00:15:30,971 --> 00:15:33,096
Really? We are?

277
00:15:33,180 --> 00:15:36,596
Well, yeah. I'm gonna have a boyfriend
and you're gonna have a girlfriend.

278
00:15:37,596 --> 00:15:38,846
Oh, you…

279
00:15:38,930 --> 00:15:40,763
That'd be great.

280
00:15:42,180 --> 00:15:43,097
But you know what?

281
00:15:43,180 --> 00:15:45,680
If you think it's gonna be okay,
we'll just work out a system.

282
00:15:45,763 --> 00:15:49,346
It'll be like in college. I'll hang
a hanger on the door and put a sign,

283
00:15:49,430 --> 00:15:51,721
"Come back later. I'm getting lucky."

284
00:15:57,763 --> 00:16:00,055
Yeah, I didn't think of that.

285
00:16:02,471 --> 00:16:06,596
So are you sure
about this whole moving–in thing?

286
00:16:06,680 --> 00:16:10,763
I mean, it's a really big step.
And what's the rush?

287
00:16:15,221 --> 00:16:16,763
That's very funny.

288
00:16:16,846 --> 00:16:19,805
He's being silly
because he knows we enjoy the silliness.

289
00:16:21,763 --> 00:16:25,138
No, I'm serious, okay?
I mean, think about it.

290
00:16:25,221 --> 00:16:29,805
You move in, you start fighting
over stupid game rooms,

291
00:16:29,888 --> 00:16:31,471
next thing you know, you break up.

292
00:16:31,555 --> 00:16:34,846
Ross, you were right before.
It was just a stupid fight about a room.

293
00:16:34,930 --> 00:16:36,680
Okay, there are no stupid fights.

294
00:16:38,055 --> 00:16:40,263
This isn't about the room.

295
00:16:40,346 --> 00:16:43,971
This is about what the room represents.

296
00:16:44,055 --> 00:16:47,680
And unfortunately,
this room could destroy you.

297
00:16:49,305 --> 00:16:52,096
–Yeah, I'm not so worried.
–Yeah, no, me neither.

298
00:16:52,180 --> 00:16:53,721
Fine. It's your life!

299
00:16:55,596 --> 00:16:57,388
I just don't wanna
see you guys break up, you know?

300
00:16:57,471 --> 00:17:01,346
Which you will do
if you move in together.

301
00:17:03,888 --> 00:17:06,805
But if that's what you want,
there's nothing I can do.

302
00:17:06,888 --> 00:17:08,346
Don't do it!

303
00:17:13,930 --> 00:17:16,430
–You still wanna move in together, right?
–Of course.

304
00:17:16,513 --> 00:17:18,013
Ross didn't scare you?

305
00:17:18,096 --> 00:17:19,930
Scared me out of ever wanting
to live with him.

306
00:17:22,180 --> 00:17:24,305
–Come here, I gotta show you something.
–Okay.

307
00:17:27,513 --> 00:17:29,763
Oh, my God,
someone's killed Square Man.

308
00:17:32,263 --> 00:17:34,346
This is where I thought
the Barcalounger could go.

309
00:17:34,430 --> 00:17:38,305
You see, you can see the TV, and still,
it's walking distance to the kitchen.

310
00:17:38,388 --> 00:17:40,096
Oh, that's so sweet.

311
00:17:41,013 --> 00:17:42,638
–Mmm. I wanna show you something too.
–Okay.

312
00:17:42,721 --> 00:17:46,346
You know those big road signs
that say, "Merge?"

313
00:17:46,430 --> 00:17:47,305
–Mmm–hmm.
–You know?

314
00:17:47,388 --> 00:17:50,138
So I was thinking that we could get
one of those signs

315
00:17:50,221 --> 00:17:51,888
and hang it over our bed.

316
00:17:53,638 --> 00:17:56,471
Because that's you and I together.

317
00:17:56,555 --> 00:17:57,721
"Merge."

318
00:17:59,596 --> 00:18:01,638
–Oh, my God, I love that.
–Really?

319
00:18:01,721 --> 00:18:02,763
No.

320
00:18:06,388 --> 00:18:09,721
I found you in my bed

321
00:18:09,805 --> 00:18:12,555
How'd you wind up there?

322
00:18:12,638 --> 00:18:15,721
You are a mystery

323
00:18:15,805 --> 00:18:18,221
Little black curly hair

324
00:18:19,263 --> 00:18:21,471
Little black curly hair

325
00:18:21,555 --> 00:18:24,555
Little black, little black
Little black, little black

326
00:18:24,638 --> 00:18:29,638
Little black curly hair

327
00:18:29,721 --> 00:18:31,971
–
–Thank you.

328
00:18:33,346 --> 00:18:35,055
Um…

329
00:18:35,138 --> 00:18:37,930
If you wanna receive e–mails
about my upcoming shows,

330
00:18:38,013 --> 00:18:40,805
then please give me money
so I can buy a computer.

331
00:18:45,138 --> 00:18:46,846
So, uh…

332
00:18:46,930 --> 00:18:48,263
Where are the other guys?

333
00:18:48,346 --> 00:18:51,555
Um, well, let's see,
Monica and Chandler are occupied.

334
00:18:51,638 --> 00:18:53,388
–Fighting?
–No, the other thing.

335
00:18:55,096 --> 00:18:57,305
I really think it's great
they worked things out.

336
00:18:57,388 --> 00:18:59,888
Yeah, there's no breaking them up,
is there?

337
00:19:01,221 --> 00:19:02,305
Hey, can I borrow the key to your house

338
00:19:02,388 --> 00:19:03,930
so I can run across the street
and make a copy?

339
00:19:04,013 --> 00:19:06,263
–Sure. Here.
–Thank you.

340
00:19:07,221 --> 00:19:08,555
Now, are you sure?

341
00:19:08,638 --> 00:19:11,555
Because once I make a copy,
there's no turning back.

342
00:19:12,305 --> 00:19:13,680
Yeah, I'm sure.

343
00:19:13,763 --> 00:19:16,221
Now get out of here
before I change my mind.

344
00:19:20,430 --> 00:19:23,138
Uh, listen, Ross.

345
00:19:23,555 --> 00:19:26,555
You really think this moving in
with Rachel is a good idea?

346
00:19:26,638 --> 00:19:28,346
I've been back and forth.

347
00:19:29,346 --> 00:19:32,555
Yeah, well, maybe
you should go back, okay?

348
00:19:32,638 --> 00:19:34,846
Rachel moves in,
and before you know it,

349
00:19:34,930 --> 00:19:37,221
you're right where you don't wanna be,
back together.

350
00:19:37,305 --> 00:19:38,888
Yeah, I don't think so.

351
00:19:38,971 --> 00:19:41,721
She's already talking about,
you know, dating other guys.

352
00:19:41,805 --> 00:19:43,305
That's not gonna work out.

353
00:19:43,388 --> 00:19:46,971
Then she's gonna come home all weepy,
and you'll be telling her,

354
00:19:47,055 --> 00:19:49,305
"Oh, that's okay. You'll find someone."

355
00:19:49,388 --> 00:19:51,680
And then, bam, she finds you.

356
00:19:54,346 --> 00:19:56,930
Huh. Oh, maybe you're right.

357
00:19:57,013 --> 00:20:00,638
I am telling you, Ross, she is definitely
gonna fall in love with you again.

358
00:20:00,721 --> 00:20:02,138
Now, is that what you want?

359
00:20:02,221 --> 00:20:04,846
– Is that what I want?
–(over PA system) Yes.

360
00:20:08,763 --> 00:20:11,263
Here she comes. Hold on.
I'm gonna make your life much easier.

361
00:20:11,346 --> 00:20:14,388
All right, well, the place was closed,
so I'll just copy it later.

362
00:20:14,471 --> 00:20:15,846
Or not.

363
00:20:15,930 --> 00:20:18,513
Uh, Rach, why don't you
just move in with me?

364
00:20:18,596 --> 00:20:20,055
–
–Oh!

365
00:20:20,138 --> 00:20:23,221
–Whoa, whoa, Joey.
–No, no, no. It's okay.

366
00:20:23,305 --> 00:20:28,013
Look, Rach, I know I scared you off
with that whole naked Thursdays thing

367
00:20:29,805 --> 00:20:31,680
but we don't have to do that.

368
00:20:31,763 --> 00:20:35,555
Well, it would be easier
to move just right across the hall.

369
00:20:37,513 --> 00:20:40,596
Wait a minute, unless you're thinking
about naked Wednesdays.

370
00:20:42,263 --> 00:20:44,888
Thursday's clearly not good for you.
Pick a day.

371
00:20:51,013 --> 00:20:52,180
–Hi.
–Hi.

372
00:20:52,263 --> 00:20:54,596
Come on in. Thanks for coming back.

373
00:20:54,680 --> 00:20:57,805
Okay, there have been a lot of people
interested in the room.

374
00:20:57,888 --> 00:21:00,680
But I have narrowed it down,
and you are one of the finalists.

375
00:21:00,763 --> 00:21:03,346
–Great.
–Okay, now, before I make my decision,

376
00:21:03,430 --> 00:21:06,846
I just wanna make sure
that our personalities match, okay?

377
00:21:06,930 --> 00:21:08,263
So I made up a little test.

378
00:21:08,346 --> 00:21:12,471
Now, I'm gonna say a word, and then you
say the first thing that comes to mind.

379
00:21:12,555 --> 00:21:14,680
–I can do that.
–Okay, here we go.

380
00:21:15,596 --> 00:21:16,930
–Pillow.
–Fight.

381
00:21:17,513 --> 00:21:19,013
Very good.

382
00:21:19,846 --> 00:21:22,055
Okay. G.

383
00:21:22,138 --> 00:21:24,305
–String?
–Excellent.

384
00:21:25,846 --> 00:21:27,888
Okay. Um…

385
00:21:28,846 --> 00:21:30,138
Doggy.

386
00:21:31,930 --> 00:21:34,555
–Kitten?
–Ooh, sorry.

387
00:21:36,138 --> 00:21:39,388
No, no, no. So close, though.
But, you know, okay, bye–bye.