1 00:00:03,336 --> 00:00:05,170 We learned one thing, C.H.E.E.S.E: 2 00:00:05,422 --> 00:00:08,924 Cheerleaders and high explosives don't mix. 3 00:00:11,344 --> 00:00:13,262 You can say that again, Mac. 4 00:00:13,513 --> 00:00:16,015 I couldn't have done it alone. You're a genius. 5 00:00:16,266 --> 00:00:21,353 Oh, yeah? Well, how come I can't get my VCR to stop blinking 12:00? 6 00:00:28,236 --> 00:00:29,737 What did you guys think? 7 00:00:34,617 --> 00:00:36,869 Hey, the phone. I got it. I got it. 8 00:00:37,078 --> 00:00:38,412 Hello. 9 00:00:38,621 --> 00:00:40,372 - Hold on. Joey, it's your mom. - It's Mommy. 10 00:00:40,582 --> 00:00:41,915 Aw... That's nice. 11 00:00:42,083 --> 00:00:44,001 Ma, so what did you think? 12 00:00:44,961 --> 00:00:46,128 Well... 13 00:00:46,546 --> 00:00:48,922 that was, um, okay. 14 00:00:49,174 --> 00:00:50,507 It wasn't the best. 15 00:00:50,717 --> 00:00:53,218 That was one of the worst things ever... 16 00:00:54,512 --> 00:00:56,972 and not just on TV. 17 00:00:57,557 --> 00:00:59,892 - What should we say? - The lighting was okay. 18 00:01:00,143 --> 00:01:03,228 You got lighting last time. Lighting is mine. 19 00:01:03,688 --> 00:01:04,730 I have costumes. 20 00:01:04,981 --> 00:01:06,398 That means I'm stuck with: 21 00:01:06,649 --> 00:01:11,779 "So we were watching you in there, and you were sitting right here. Whoa." 22 00:01:12,906 --> 00:01:14,948 - What about you? - I don't know. 23 00:01:15,200 --> 00:01:18,494 I can't lie to him again. Oh, no, I... No. 24 00:01:18,745 --> 00:01:21,497 I'm just gonna press my breasts up against him. 25 00:01:22,874 --> 00:01:25,084 - And say nothing? - Uh-huh, yeah, that's right. 26 00:01:27,087 --> 00:01:29,171 Wow, my folks really liked it. 27 00:01:29,422 --> 00:01:30,923 What did you guys think? 28 00:01:37,680 --> 00:01:39,098 It wasn't that good. 29 00:02:21,307 --> 00:02:25,060 Do you think that your favorite animal says much about you? 30 00:02:25,353 --> 00:02:27,104 You mean behind my back? 31 00:02:28,815 --> 00:02:31,900 Oh, you'll never believe what happened to me today. 32 00:02:32,152 --> 00:02:34,278 - I am sitting in my office... You guys! 33 00:02:34,487 --> 00:02:36,196 Guess what my agent just said? 34 00:02:36,447 --> 00:02:38,157 I'm in the middle of a story here. 35 00:02:38,408 --> 00:02:39,741 Sorry, you finish. 36 00:02:39,993 --> 00:02:42,870 I'm sitting in my office, and guess who walks in. 37 00:02:43,204 --> 00:02:45,164 I'm gonna be on two TV shows. 38 00:02:45,415 --> 00:02:46,456 That's great. 39 00:02:47,417 --> 00:02:49,376 - Joey. - You weren't finished? 40 00:02:49,627 --> 00:02:52,337 Yeah, "Guess who walks into my office" is my story. 41 00:02:53,882 --> 00:02:56,008 Ralph Lauren walked into my office. 42 00:02:56,259 --> 00:02:59,928 Uh, if you're starting another story, at least let me finish mine. 43 00:03:01,222 --> 00:03:02,723 It's the same story. 44 00:03:02,932 --> 00:03:05,767 Uh, wow, it's really long. 45 00:03:06,477 --> 00:03:10,189 Ralph just came in to tell me that he's so happy with my work... 46 00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:13,650 that he wants me to be the new merchandising manager for Polo retail. 47 00:03:13,818 --> 00:03:14,860 Aw... 48 00:03:15,028 --> 00:03:16,862 - Still get a discount on wedding gowns? - Yeah. 49 00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:18,197 I'm so happy for you. 50 00:03:20,617 --> 00:03:22,910 These really are the days of our lives. 51 00:03:24,204 --> 00:03:26,246 - What? - Well, since you ask, ha, ha... 52 00:03:26,497 --> 00:03:28,373 They want me back on Days of our Lives. 53 00:03:29,751 --> 00:03:32,085 - I get a big pay raise! - Oh, hey! 54 00:03:32,337 --> 00:03:34,838 I'll be playing Drake Ramoray's twin brother, Stryker. 55 00:03:35,006 --> 00:03:36,548 Ooh... 56 00:03:36,716 --> 00:03:38,217 I get to hire my own assistant. 57 00:03:39,928 --> 00:03:43,513 Well... I got a head rush from standing up too fast. 58 00:03:49,312 --> 00:03:51,146 You were at this job four years? 59 00:03:51,397 --> 00:03:55,442 - That's right. - This is all very impressive, Hilda. 60 00:03:55,610 --> 00:03:59,363 Um, I just have one last question for you, uh... 61 00:03:59,530 --> 00:04:01,448 How did I do? Was this okay? 62 00:04:02,784 --> 00:04:04,993 - What? - I've never interviewed anyone. 63 00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:07,329 I've never had anyone work for me. 64 00:04:07,580 --> 00:04:10,874 When I was a kid we had a maid, but this isn't the same. 65 00:04:11,125 --> 00:04:13,335 No, dear, it's not. 66 00:04:14,337 --> 00:04:15,420 And I know that. 67 00:04:17,131 --> 00:04:19,258 Well, thank you so much for coming in. 68 00:04:19,509 --> 00:04:21,510 - Nice to meet you. - Good meeting you. 69 00:04:21,761 --> 00:04:23,136 All right. 70 00:04:24,639 --> 00:04:26,265 I'm a total pro. 71 00:04:27,558 --> 00:04:30,018 - Hello. - Wow. Huh, um... 72 00:04:31,771 --> 00:04:34,523 Hi, yes, I'm sorry. The models are down the hall. 73 00:04:34,774 --> 00:04:37,025 I'm here about the assistant job. 74 00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:38,568 Really? 75 00:04:39,153 --> 00:04:42,948 Okay, well, then, all right. Well, just have a seat there. 76 00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:44,741 Um, so what's...? What your name? 77 00:04:45,034 --> 00:04:46,076 Tag Jones. 78 00:04:46,327 --> 00:04:48,120 Uh-huh, go on. 79 00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:51,290 That's it. That's my whole name. 80 00:04:51,541 --> 00:04:53,583 That's your whole name. Of course. 81 00:04:54,252 --> 00:04:56,545 Okay, let's just have a look-see here. 82 00:04:56,796 --> 00:05:00,507 I haven't worked in an office before. I don't have much experience... 83 00:05:00,758 --> 00:05:04,845 What are you talking about? You got three years painting houses... 84 00:05:05,471 --> 00:05:09,016 two whole summers at T.G.I. Friday's. 85 00:05:09,726 --> 00:05:10,934 It's lame, I know. 86 00:05:11,185 --> 00:05:14,021 But I'm a goal-oriented person, eager to learn... 87 00:05:14,230 --> 00:05:16,189 Just hold on a second, please. 88 00:05:20,611 --> 00:05:23,864 It's for Human Resources. Everybody has to. Would you stand up? 89 00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:34,249 Ha, ha, no, no, no. 90 00:05:45,303 --> 00:05:46,595 - Hey. - Shh, shh, shh. 91 00:05:51,392 --> 00:05:54,061 - Anyway, I should go. - Okay. Bye. 92 00:05:54,270 --> 00:05:56,063 - Hey, sweetie. - Hi, sweetie. 93 00:05:56,314 --> 00:05:58,357 What was with all the whispering? 94 00:05:58,733 --> 00:06:00,817 I can't tell you. It's a secret. 95 00:06:01,235 --> 00:06:04,821 Secret? Married people aren't supposed to have secrets. 96 00:06:05,073 --> 00:06:07,699 We love and respect one another too much. 97 00:06:08,201 --> 00:06:09,534 Aw... 98 00:06:09,702 --> 00:06:11,453 But still, no, ha, ha. 99 00:06:11,621 --> 00:06:15,749 We should tell each other everything. I don't have secrets from you. 100 00:06:15,958 --> 00:06:20,462 Really? So tell me what happened to Ross, junior year at Disneyland. 101 00:06:20,713 --> 00:06:21,838 No, I can't do that. 102 00:06:23,466 --> 00:06:25,175 I'll tell you what Phoebe said. 103 00:06:25,968 --> 00:06:27,010 - Okay. - Okay. 104 00:06:27,261 --> 00:06:29,596 So, ahem, Ross and I are going to Disneyland. 105 00:06:29,847 --> 00:06:32,015 We stop at this restaurant for tacos. 106 00:06:32,266 --> 00:06:36,895 When I say restaurant, I mean a guy, a hibachi, and the trunk of his car. 107 00:06:37,688 --> 00:06:39,564 So Ross has about ten tacos. 108 00:06:39,816 --> 00:06:44,361 Anyway, we're on Space Mountain and Ross starts to feel a little iffy. 109 00:06:44,612 --> 00:06:46,196 Oh, my God. He threw up? 110 00:06:46,447 --> 00:06:49,408 No, he visited a town a little south of throw up. 111 00:06:50,201 --> 00:06:52,035 Oh, my God! 112 00:06:52,662 --> 00:06:54,413 What was Phoebe's secret? 113 00:06:54,664 --> 00:06:57,916 Um, Nancy Thompson, from Phoebe's old massage place, is getting fired. 114 00:06:58,084 --> 00:06:59,167 Oh. 115 00:07:02,672 --> 00:07:05,757 That's it? I gave up my Disneyland story for that? 116 00:07:05,967 --> 00:07:07,926 Hm, that's right. You lose, sucker! 117 00:07:11,264 --> 00:07:12,889 Please still marry me. 118 00:07:16,686 --> 00:07:18,770 You have an assistant, right? 119 00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:20,063 Did she call? 120 00:07:20,231 --> 00:07:24,109 You told her I was sick, right? Always tell her I am sick. 121 00:07:24,986 --> 00:07:27,696 I don't know. How do you decide who to hire? 122 00:07:27,905 --> 00:07:29,614 I have it down to two people. 123 00:07:29,866 --> 00:07:32,909 One has great references and a lot of experience. 124 00:07:33,119 --> 00:07:35,537 - And then, there's this guy. - What about him? 125 00:07:37,165 --> 00:07:38,415 I love him. 126 00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:42,294 He's so pretty, I want to cry. 127 00:07:42,503 --> 00:07:43,879 I don't know what to do. 128 00:07:44,130 --> 00:07:47,716 Come on, you know what to do. You hire the first one. 129 00:07:47,925 --> 00:07:52,596 Don't hire assistants because they're cute. Do it because they're qualified. 130 00:07:53,306 --> 00:07:54,598 Uh-huh. 131 00:07:56,017 --> 00:08:00,353 I hear you. You make a lot of sense. Can I just say one more thing? 132 00:08:00,605 --> 00:08:01,813 Look how pretty. 133 00:08:03,900 --> 00:08:04,941 Let me see. 134 00:08:05,943 --> 00:08:07,944 Oh, my God. 135 00:08:08,446 --> 00:08:10,489 Oh. But, no. 136 00:08:10,740 --> 00:08:13,950 No. You can't... You can't hire him because it's not professional. 137 00:08:14,911 --> 00:08:17,746 Um, this is for me, yes? 138 00:08:18,581 --> 00:08:21,708 Okay, you're right. I'll hire Hilda tomorrow. 139 00:08:21,959 --> 00:08:24,711 Dumb, old, perfect-for-the-job Hilda. 140 00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:26,546 Let me see. 141 00:08:28,549 --> 00:08:30,467 Wo-ha-ow! 142 00:08:30,718 --> 00:08:32,761 Don't show this to Monica. 143 00:08:32,970 --> 00:08:35,388 And don't tell her about the "Wo-ha-ow!" 144 00:08:42,063 --> 00:08:44,064 - Ha, ha, hey, Joey. - Hey, Terry. 145 00:08:44,315 --> 00:08:46,525 - Nice to see you again. - Been a while. 146 00:08:46,734 --> 00:08:49,569 Funny, these halls look smaller than they used to. 147 00:08:50,279 --> 00:08:52,155 It's a different building. 148 00:08:53,366 --> 00:08:54,449 So... 149 00:08:54,951 --> 00:08:57,202 Stryker Ramoray, huh? 150 00:08:57,453 --> 00:08:59,704 - When do I start? - How about right now? 151 00:08:59,956 --> 00:09:01,331 Okay. 152 00:09:01,916 --> 00:09:04,042 Here are the audition scenes. 153 00:09:07,672 --> 00:09:10,215 I thought you were offering me the part. 154 00:09:10,466 --> 00:09:11,550 Why? 155 00:09:11,759 --> 00:09:14,177 I was Doctor Drake Ramoray, Stryker's twin brother. 156 00:09:15,555 --> 00:09:18,056 Who looks more like me than me, right? 157 00:09:18,724 --> 00:09:21,434 Everybody has to audition. Ha, ha. 158 00:09:23,229 --> 00:09:26,147 You know, Terry, I don't really need to do this. 159 00:09:26,357 --> 00:09:29,067 I got my own cable TV series... 160 00:09:29,360 --> 00:09:31,528 with a robot. 161 00:09:32,655 --> 00:09:35,448 I'm sorry, Joey. That's the way it is. 162 00:09:36,325 --> 00:09:37,617 Well... 163 00:09:38,452 --> 00:09:40,787 I guess you think you're pretty special, huh? 164 00:09:41,038 --> 00:09:44,499 Sitting up here in your fancy, small-halled building... 165 00:09:46,127 --> 00:09:48,587 making stars jump through hoops for you, huh? 166 00:09:48,838 --> 00:09:50,338 Well, you know what? 167 00:09:52,216 --> 00:09:55,010 This is one star whose hoop... 168 00:09:55,261 --> 00:09:57,429 This is the star the hoop... This hoop... 169 00:09:57,680 --> 00:09:59,639 I was Doctor Drake Ramoray! 170 00:10:07,315 --> 00:10:09,858 Hi, Tag. What are you doing here? 171 00:10:10,109 --> 00:10:13,528 I came to thank you for not laughing in my face yesterday. 172 00:10:13,779 --> 00:10:17,198 I noticed there were no plants so I brought you your first. 173 00:10:17,700 --> 00:10:19,743 There is a plant in your office. 174 00:10:20,578 --> 00:10:21,953 Kind of. 175 00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:23,705 Right. 176 00:10:24,165 --> 00:10:27,042 So I guess I shouldn't put "good at noticing stuff" on my résumé. 177 00:10:27,209 --> 00:10:28,251 Oh... 178 00:10:28,628 --> 00:10:30,629 - Thank you. - Anyway... 179 00:10:30,963 --> 00:10:32,922 I'm guessing you hired somebody. 180 00:10:33,591 --> 00:10:34,799 Well... 181 00:10:35,176 --> 00:10:36,426 Gotcha. 182 00:10:36,844 --> 00:10:38,928 Thanks again for meeting with me. 183 00:10:40,806 --> 00:10:42,057 But I hired you. 184 00:10:44,018 --> 00:10:46,019 - What? - Yeah, you got the job. 185 00:10:46,228 --> 00:10:48,229 - You're my new assistant. - I am? 186 00:10:48,481 --> 00:10:49,898 Yeah. 187 00:10:51,025 --> 00:10:54,361 - I can't believe it. - Ha, ha, me either. 188 00:10:56,030 --> 00:10:58,448 First, I need you to go downstairs... 189 00:10:58,699 --> 00:11:01,451 find a woman named Hilda, and tell her to go home. 190 00:11:06,832 --> 00:11:08,458 - Hey. - Hey, good, you're home. 191 00:11:09,001 --> 00:11:11,961 Always nicer to hear than, "Oh, crap, you again." 192 00:11:13,756 --> 00:11:15,882 Hey, sweetie, I made you a surprise. 193 00:11:16,133 --> 00:11:17,967 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah, tacos. 194 00:11:18,177 --> 00:11:21,179 Ever since that story, I've had such a craving. 195 00:11:23,224 --> 00:11:25,308 Did you not understand the story? 196 00:11:27,603 --> 00:11:29,229 - Hey. - Hey, what's up? 197 00:11:29,397 --> 00:11:32,816 Ah, nothing. Just figuring out what to do for dinner. 198 00:11:35,444 --> 00:11:37,612 Hey, ooh, what's that? Dinner stuff? 199 00:11:37,780 --> 00:11:38,822 - You making dinner? - No. 200 00:11:40,324 --> 00:11:41,366 Shh! 201 00:11:43,786 --> 00:11:45,370 What's over there? Tacos? 202 00:11:45,621 --> 00:11:46,705 No. No. 203 00:11:48,582 --> 00:11:49,874 They're just, uh... They're... 204 00:11:50,042 --> 00:11:52,335 They're ground beef smileys. 205 00:11:53,754 --> 00:11:55,630 Uh, those are tacos. 206 00:11:55,840 --> 00:11:58,383 Excuse me, Mr. Mexico. 207 00:11:59,260 --> 00:12:02,137 Either way, I'll pass. Still can't eat those. 208 00:12:02,304 --> 00:12:04,097 Ha, ha. 209 00:12:10,771 --> 00:12:12,063 What's so funny? 210 00:12:17,945 --> 00:12:19,529 I'm not laughing. 211 00:12:28,289 --> 00:12:29,956 You told her! 212 00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:32,542 Nancy Thompson's getting fired. 213 00:12:36,714 --> 00:12:40,759 Okay, okay. I had food poisoning. It's not like I chose to do it! 214 00:12:41,010 --> 00:12:44,888 It's not like I said, "What would make this ride more fun?" 215 00:12:45,890 --> 00:12:49,684 Right. You're right, I'm sorry. I shouldn't be laughing. 216 00:12:49,935 --> 00:12:52,312 I should be laying down papers for you. 217 00:12:55,399 --> 00:12:58,234 - How could you? - I had to. We're getting married. 218 00:12:58,444 --> 00:13:00,945 Married couples can't keep secrets. 219 00:13:01,155 --> 00:13:04,073 I... I guess Monica should know about Atlantic City. 220 00:13:04,283 --> 00:13:05,950 Du... ude! 221 00:13:06,994 --> 00:13:09,913 - What happened? - Chandler and I are in a bar... 222 00:13:10,122 --> 00:13:12,540 Did you not hear me say, "Du... ude"? 223 00:13:13,417 --> 00:13:16,711 - And this girl is making eyes at Chandler. 224 00:13:16,921 --> 00:13:21,716 So he goes over to her and, uh, after a minute or two, I see them kissing. 225 00:13:22,092 --> 00:13:26,429 You're thinking he's not the type to go to bars and make out with girls. 226 00:13:26,680 --> 00:13:28,681 And you're right. He's not the type... 227 00:13:28,933 --> 00:13:33,061 to go to bars and make out with "girls." 228 00:13:34,730 --> 00:13:36,773 You kissed a guy? 229 00:13:38,567 --> 00:13:40,151 Oh, my God! 230 00:13:40,361 --> 00:13:44,572 In my defense, it was dark and he was a very pretty guy. 231 00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:48,159 Oh, Mon, I laughed so hard... 232 00:13:48,327 --> 00:13:52,539 Ho-ho, so hard we had to throw out your underwear again? 233 00:13:54,416 --> 00:13:56,626 Whatever, dude. You kissed a guy. 234 00:14:02,424 --> 00:14:03,800 - Hi. - Hey. 235 00:14:04,051 --> 00:14:05,760 How's Hilda working out? 236 00:14:06,178 --> 00:14:11,391 Oh, my new assistant is working out. Yes. 237 00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:13,226 She happy she got the job? 238 00:14:13,435 --> 00:14:18,940 My new assistant is very happy that I hired my new assistant. 239 00:14:21,110 --> 00:14:22,360 Hello. 240 00:14:22,611 --> 00:14:24,946 Oh, hey! Can you hang on a second? 241 00:14:25,155 --> 00:14:27,240 It's the producers at Mac and C.H.E.E.S. E... 242 00:14:27,408 --> 00:14:29,325 if you'll excuse me for a minute. 243 00:14:31,078 --> 00:14:35,498 Hey, funny you should call. I was just looking over next week's script. 244 00:14:36,625 --> 00:14:38,001 Canceled? 245 00:14:39,086 --> 00:14:41,462 Like, they're taking it off the air? Oh. 246 00:14:43,007 --> 00:14:45,925 All right, I'll see you Monday. 247 00:14:46,635 --> 00:14:48,720 We're not even shooting them anymore! 248 00:14:49,722 --> 00:14:51,973 All right. Bye. 249 00:14:53,225 --> 00:14:54,976 They canceled Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E. 250 00:14:55,144 --> 00:14:56,936 - Oh, sorry. - Oh, sorry, Joey. 251 00:14:57,146 --> 00:14:59,939 Why would they do that? It was a good show, right? 252 00:15:12,244 --> 00:15:14,746 You want to tell secrets? Okay, in college... 253 00:15:14,997 --> 00:15:17,123 Ross used to wear leg warmers. 254 00:15:18,959 --> 00:15:24,505 All right, Chandler entered a Vanilla Ice look-alike contest and won. 255 00:15:26,258 --> 00:15:28,468 Ross came in fourth and cried! 256 00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:30,470 Oh, my God! 257 00:15:31,263 --> 00:15:33,723 Oh, is that funny? You find that funny? 258 00:15:33,933 --> 00:15:36,809 Maybe Chandler should know your secrets too. 259 00:15:36,977 --> 00:15:39,270 Ha, ha. Oh, I... I already told him everything. 260 00:15:39,438 --> 00:15:41,105 You shush! 261 00:15:42,066 --> 00:15:44,359 Once, she was sent to bed without dinner... 262 00:15:44,610 --> 00:15:47,570 so she ate the macaroni off a jewelry box she'd made. 263 00:15:50,407 --> 00:15:54,077 Ross stayed home every Saturday night to watch Golden Girls. 264 00:15:56,538 --> 00:15:59,165 Monica couldn't tell time until she was 13. 265 00:16:01,293 --> 00:16:03,503 It's hard for some people! 266 00:16:04,254 --> 00:16:05,922 Of course it is. 267 00:16:06,131 --> 00:16:08,132 Wow. 268 00:16:08,592 --> 00:16:11,678 - Chandler wore my underwear to work! - Hey! 269 00:16:12,888 --> 00:16:16,474 Oh, I'm sorry, I couldn't think of any more for Ross. 270 00:16:16,767 --> 00:16:18,476 In college, Chandler got drunk... 271 00:16:18,727 --> 00:16:20,728 and slept with the lady who cleaned our dorm. 272 00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:23,564 That was you. 273 00:16:26,902 --> 00:16:28,695 Whatever, dude. You kissed a guy. 274 00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:33,491 How could this happen to me? 275 00:16:33,742 --> 00:16:38,454 Yesterday, I had two TV shows. Today, I got nothing. 276 00:16:38,706 --> 00:16:41,541 Wait a minute, what happened to Days of our Lives? 277 00:16:41,750 --> 00:16:44,877 Uh, well, they might be a little mad at me over there. 278 00:16:45,504 --> 00:16:46,546 What happened? 279 00:16:46,797 --> 00:16:51,968 Well, maybe I got a little upset, and maybe I told them where they could go. 280 00:16:52,469 --> 00:16:54,679 Joey, why would you do that? 281 00:16:54,930 --> 00:16:57,390 Because! They wanted me to audition. 282 00:16:57,599 --> 00:17:01,019 You, an actor? That's madness! 283 00:17:08,485 --> 00:17:10,319 Rachel Green's office. 284 00:17:12,823 --> 00:17:13,865 Tag. 285 00:17:14,116 --> 00:17:15,575 Hi, who was that? 286 00:17:15,951 --> 00:17:19,078 Nobody. I was just practicing. 287 00:17:19,329 --> 00:17:20,538 Really? 288 00:17:26,128 --> 00:17:29,088 - Hi. - Hi, Rachel Green's office. 289 00:17:30,507 --> 00:17:32,800 - You must be Hilda. Ahem. 290 00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:36,054 He's Tag. This is Phoebe. 291 00:17:36,221 --> 00:17:38,181 - Phoebe, can I see you for a sec? Mm-hm. 292 00:17:38,348 --> 00:17:39,515 - Phoebe. Mm-hm. 293 00:17:40,017 --> 00:17:41,851 - Great name. - You like that? 294 00:17:42,061 --> 00:17:44,729 - You should hear my phone number. - Okay. 295 00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:53,279 So you hired yourself a little treat, did you? 296 00:17:54,323 --> 00:17:56,657 I know how it looks, but I am telling you... 297 00:17:56,909 --> 00:17:59,410 You can't get involved with your assistant. 298 00:17:59,661 --> 00:18:04,373 I know that, and I know hiring him was not the smartest thing I've ever done. 299 00:18:04,625 --> 00:18:07,376 But, from now on, I swear this is strictly professional. 300 00:18:08,754 --> 00:18:10,046 - Yes. - Hey, Rachel. 301 00:18:10,214 --> 00:18:11,255 Hi. 302 00:18:11,507 --> 00:18:14,050 Cute assistant. What's his story? 303 00:18:14,301 --> 00:18:16,552 - Is he...? - Gay? Yeah. 304 00:18:21,517 --> 00:18:24,602 Hey, Terry. 305 00:18:24,853 --> 00:18:26,104 Joey Tribbiani. 306 00:18:26,313 --> 00:18:30,024 Surprised your big head could fit through our small halls. 307 00:18:31,151 --> 00:18:33,361 I gotta go, Joey. Wait, Terry! Look, uh... 308 00:18:33,612 --> 00:18:35,530 I'm really sorry about before. 309 00:18:35,781 --> 00:18:38,991 I was an idiot, thinking I'm too big to audition for you. 310 00:18:39,243 --> 00:18:41,452 - Give me another chance. - I can't. 311 00:18:41,662 --> 00:18:43,496 Wait, Terry, please! 312 00:18:44,414 --> 00:18:46,707 Look, I just lost my other job, okay? 313 00:18:46,959 --> 00:18:50,128 You have no idea how much I need this. 314 00:18:50,379 --> 00:18:51,879 Please, help me out. 315 00:18:52,256 --> 00:18:54,173 For old times' sake. 316 00:18:55,467 --> 00:18:58,803 This guy's been in a coma for five years. It's hopeless. 317 00:18:59,054 --> 00:19:02,056 It's not. Dr. Stryker Ramoray is a miracle worker. 318 00:19:02,266 --> 00:19:03,349 Here he comes. 319 00:19:04,268 --> 00:19:05,643 Good morning. 320 00:19:11,900 --> 00:19:16,487 Drake, it's your brother, Stryker. Can you hear me? 321 00:19:16,780 --> 00:19:18,030 And cut. 322 00:19:20,742 --> 00:19:22,118 I'm back, baby! 323 00:19:35,299 --> 00:19:37,675 You know, in my defense, um... 324 00:19:37,926 --> 00:19:41,512 there was no glitter on the macaroni and very little glue. 325 00:19:41,972 --> 00:19:45,516 And in my defense, the cleaning lady came on to me. 326 00:19:46,977 --> 00:19:49,979 - Do you have trouble telling time now? - No. 327 00:19:50,230 --> 00:19:52,940 - Quick, what time is it? - Time to kiss a guy? 328 00:19:57,070 --> 00:19:58,738 What are you laughing at, Pampers? 329 00:20:02,242 --> 00:20:04,285 You know when I said married people... 330 00:20:04,536 --> 00:20:07,371 should share everything and not have any secrets? 331 00:20:07,623 --> 00:20:10,458 - Yeah? - That was stupid. Let's not do that. 332 00:20:10,626 --> 00:20:11,709 Oh. 333 00:20:12,127 --> 00:20:13,169 Absolutely. 334 00:20:13,337 --> 00:20:17,465 We should keep the stuff we told each other secret from everyone else. 335 00:20:17,716 --> 00:20:19,550 Ha, ha. - Yeah, definitely. 336 00:20:20,928 --> 00:20:22,011 Okay, ha, ha. 337 00:20:22,179 --> 00:20:24,680 If you'll excuse me, I'm gonna hang out with people... 338 00:20:24,848 --> 00:20:27,350 who don't know the Space Mountain story. 339 00:20:27,935 --> 00:20:31,854 - Then I'd steer clear of Phoebe. - Man! 340 00:20:33,398 --> 00:20:37,818 Not that you would, but I wouldn't hang out with the guys at my office. 341 00:20:48,664 --> 00:20:49,705 Hi. 342 00:20:51,959 --> 00:20:54,418 - Do you have a minute? - Sure. What's up? 343 00:20:55,087 --> 00:20:58,506 I got asked out twice today while I was at lunch... 344 00:20:58,757 --> 00:21:00,466 by guys. 345 00:21:02,844 --> 00:21:03,970 - Really? Yeah. 346 00:21:04,388 --> 00:21:06,597 Did you tell someone that I was gay? 347 00:21:06,807 --> 00:21:10,142 Oh, did you not want people to know that? 348 00:21:11,478 --> 00:21:16,190 I'm not gay. I especially wouldn't want you to think I was gay. 349 00:21:16,692 --> 00:21:18,276 Why is that? 350 00:21:20,195 --> 00:21:23,698 - I don't think I should say. - Oh, you can say. 351 00:21:25,534 --> 00:21:29,203 Come on, I don't want you to feel like you can't tell me things. 352 00:21:31,915 --> 00:21:33,082 - Okay. - Okay. 353 00:21:34,084 --> 00:21:35,918 - Well... - Yeah. 354 00:21:36,295 --> 00:21:38,671 I'd love to ask out your friend Phoebe. 355 00:21:41,717 --> 00:21:43,467 Yeah, she's gay.