1 00:00:03,629 --> 00:00:06,048 - Hey, guys. I got some bad news. What? 2 00:00:06,215 --> 00:00:11,554 That's no way to sell newspapers. Try, "Extra! Extra! Read all about it!" 3 00:00:11,721 --> 00:00:16,017 No. Monica's restaurant got a horrible review in the Post. 4 00:00:16,183 --> 00:00:17,309 Oh, no! 5 00:00:17,476 --> 00:00:22,606 I didn't want her to see it, so I ran around and bought all the copies I could find. 6 00:00:22,773 --> 00:00:26,569 Man, this is bad. And I've had my share of bad reviews. 7 00:00:26,736 --> 00:00:28,404 I still remember my first good one: 8 00:00:28,571 --> 00:00:31,991 "Everything else in this production of Our Town was simply terrible. 9 00:00:32,158 --> 00:00:35,161 Joey Tribbiani was abysmal." 10 00:00:38,080 --> 00:00:39,206 - Hey. Hey. 11 00:00:39,373 --> 00:00:41,542 Oh, my God! Look at all the newspapers. 12 00:00:41,709 --> 00:00:44,670 It must be a good review. Is it great? 13 00:00:44,837 --> 00:00:46,630 Um... 14 00:00:49,967 --> 00:00:51,010 Oh, dear God. 15 00:00:51,177 --> 00:00:55,139 But the good news is, no one in a two-block radius will ever know. 16 00:00:56,891 --> 00:01:00,227 - What about the rest of Manhattan? - Yeah, they all know. 17 00:01:00,686 --> 00:01:03,439 - Oh, my God, this is horrible. - I'm sorry. 18 00:01:03,606 --> 00:01:05,024 I'm so humiliated. 19 00:01:05,191 --> 00:01:08,778 But you know what they say, there is no such thing as bad press. 20 00:01:08,944 --> 00:01:14,408 You don't think that, um, "the chef's mahi-mahi was awful-awful" is bad press? 21 00:01:16,368 --> 00:01:18,370 I didn't write it. 22 00:01:18,537 --> 00:01:22,458 - God, is he right? Am I awful? Oh, no! 23 00:01:22,625 --> 00:01:24,210 Hey, Monica, listen to me, okay? 24 00:01:24,376 --> 00:01:27,713 I'm not saying this because I'm your friend, I say it because it's true. 25 00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:30,216 Your food is abysmal! 26 00:02:15,094 --> 00:02:17,972 - Ross? - What? What? 27 00:02:18,139 --> 00:02:21,892 - I am freaking out! - Are you? 28 00:02:22,434 --> 00:02:24,645 My due date is in one week! 29 00:02:24,812 --> 00:02:27,731 - What are you doing up? - That is seven days. 30 00:02:27,898 --> 00:02:31,068 Look, I had a lot of water. Can we do this after—? 31 00:02:31,235 --> 00:02:33,154 No, no, no, no, Ross! 32 00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:35,990 Please, come on. We do not have any big stuff we need. 33 00:02:36,157 --> 00:02:39,451 We don't have a changing table. We do not have a crib. 34 00:02:39,618 --> 00:02:43,664 - We do not have a diaper service. - Funny you should mention diapers. 35 00:02:44,999 --> 00:02:47,751 - I'm serious. - Look. There's nothing to worry about. 36 00:02:47,918 --> 00:02:51,463 We have plenty of time. There's a baby furniture store on West 10th. 37 00:02:51,630 --> 00:02:53,048 Tomorrow, we'll go there... 38 00:02:53,215 --> 00:02:57,928 - ... and we'll get everything we need. Okay? - Okay. Thank you. That's great. 39 00:02:58,095 --> 00:03:01,182 Wait, where on West 10th? There's a really cute shoe store— 40 00:03:01,348 --> 00:03:04,101 Okay. If, uh— If you're gonna do this... 41 00:03:04,268 --> 00:03:06,061 then I'm gonna go do that, so... 42 00:03:06,228 --> 00:03:09,899 - Wait, Ross! I'm sorry, one more thing. - Yeah. 43 00:03:10,065 --> 00:03:14,195 Um, our situation, you know, um, what we mean to each other... 44 00:03:14,361 --> 00:03:19,825 and, I mean, we're having this baby together and we live together... 45 00:03:19,992 --> 00:03:22,578 Isn't that—? Isn't that weird? 46 00:03:28,792 --> 00:03:30,127 Well, uh... 47 00:03:30,294 --> 00:03:33,088 - I'm just kidding. You can go pee. Ha, ha. - Oh—! 48 00:03:37,343 --> 00:03:40,137 Hey, I can't remember. Did we say we were gonna meet here... 49 00:03:40,304 --> 00:03:41,972 - ... or at the movie? - At the movies— 50 00:03:42,139 --> 00:03:46,018 - I'll see you there. - Joey. Now that you're here...? 51 00:03:46,185 --> 00:03:49,188 Sure, I can hang out till I have to meet you. 52 00:03:50,105 --> 00:03:53,817 - How come you're not going? - I've got a job interview to get ready for. 53 00:03:53,984 --> 00:03:58,948 - I thought you already have a job. - And people say you don't pay attention. 54 00:03:59,114 --> 00:04:02,076 This is a much better job. It's vice president of the company... 55 00:04:02,243 --> 00:04:03,911 that does data reconfiguration... 56 00:04:04,078 --> 00:04:06,580 and statistical factoring and for other companies. 57 00:04:08,666 --> 00:04:13,420 - Wow. How do you know how to do that? - That's what I do now. 58 00:04:14,630 --> 00:04:16,924 - Joey? Come taste this. What is it? 59 00:04:17,091 --> 00:04:20,552 Remember the guy that gave me a bad review? Well... 60 00:04:20,719 --> 00:04:23,264 I'm getting my revenge. 61 00:04:24,098 --> 00:04:26,183 You cooked him? 62 00:04:26,350 --> 00:04:30,229 No. He teaches a course on food criticism at The New School. 63 00:04:30,396 --> 00:04:33,816 Before we go to the movies, I want to make him try my bouillabaisse again. 64 00:04:33,983 --> 00:04:37,194 Ugh, I can't wait to read the front page tomorrow: 65 00:04:37,361 --> 00:04:42,199 "Restaurant reviewer admits: 'I was wrong about Monica."' 66 00:04:42,366 --> 00:04:44,535 The front page? 67 00:04:44,702 --> 00:04:47,329 You really do live in your own little world, don't you? 68 00:04:53,377 --> 00:04:56,171 Do you want these delivered, Mr. and Mrs. Geller? 69 00:04:56,338 --> 00:04:58,716 - Oh, no, no, no. No, no. Heh. No, no. 70 00:04:58,882 --> 00:05:01,468 - We're not married. - We are having a baby together... 71 00:05:01,635 --> 00:05:04,054 but we're not involved. 72 00:05:04,221 --> 00:05:08,517 I mean, uh, we— We were seeing each other a while ago... 73 00:05:08,684 --> 00:05:12,646 but then we were just friends, and then there was one drunken night... 74 00:05:15,524 --> 00:05:18,527 Or, yes, stranger, we'd like this delivered, please. 75 00:05:19,695 --> 00:05:22,865 - Why don't you fill out this address card? - Oh, okay. 76 00:05:23,490 --> 00:05:26,452 - I noticed you picked out a lot of dinosaurs. Oh, yeah. 77 00:05:26,618 --> 00:05:29,204 That's one of the reasons why we are not a couple. 78 00:05:30,622 --> 00:05:33,208 I chose those. I'm a paleontologist. 79 00:05:33,375 --> 00:05:35,753 Really? That is so cool. 80 00:05:35,919 --> 00:05:40,674 Oh, don't get too worked up over it. It sounds like he's a doctor, but he's not. 81 00:05:41,759 --> 00:05:44,303 Oh, no. I'm fascinated by paleontology. 82 00:05:44,470 --> 00:05:48,599 - Have you read the Walter Alvarez book? - Yeah, heh, I teach it in class. 83 00:05:48,766 --> 00:05:53,645 Oh, my God. Standing at a cash register, I'm holding a credit card, and I'm bored. 84 00:05:54,813 --> 00:05:59,109 I love your neighborhood. There's a great gym around the corner from your building. 85 00:05:59,276 --> 00:06:02,154 - That's my gym. - I could tell you work out. 86 00:06:08,285 --> 00:06:12,831 A paleontologist who works out. You're like Indiana Jones. 87 00:06:16,668 --> 00:06:18,962 I am like Indiana Jones. 88 00:06:25,844 --> 00:06:26,887 Hi, Pheebs. 89 00:06:27,054 --> 00:06:29,473 Hey! Oh, how did baby shopping go? 90 00:06:29,640 --> 00:06:32,309 It was great! We got everything we needed. 91 00:06:32,476 --> 00:06:35,979 Oh, and Ross almost got something that wasn't on the list. 92 00:06:36,313 --> 00:06:37,856 Ahem, a whore. 93 00:06:40,192 --> 00:06:42,903 - What? - We were paying for our stuff... 94 00:06:43,070 --> 00:06:46,240 and this sales woman just started flirting with him. 95 00:06:46,407 --> 00:06:47,658 Can you believe that? 96 00:06:47,825 --> 00:06:51,036 - Did she know you two weren't married? - Yeah. 97 00:06:52,246 --> 00:06:57,584 Oh, my God. Well, the idea— A woman flirting with a single man? 98 00:06:57,751 --> 00:07:01,380 - We must alert the church elders. - No. 99 00:07:01,547 --> 00:07:05,300 You don't understand. You didn't see how brazen she was. 100 00:07:06,009 --> 00:07:08,679 - Sounds like you're a little jealous. - No, I'm not. 101 00:07:08,846 --> 00:07:13,225 I just think it's wrong. I mean, here I am, about to pop... 102 00:07:13,392 --> 00:07:17,688 and he's out picking up some shopgirl at Sluts-R-Us? 103 00:07:18,897 --> 00:07:21,400 Is that a real place? 104 00:07:21,567 --> 00:07:24,153 Are they hiring? 105 00:07:25,404 --> 00:07:28,449 - Hey, Phoebe. Fatty. - Wha—? 106 00:07:29,408 --> 00:07:31,368 Hey, Chandler, why so fancy? 107 00:07:31,535 --> 00:07:33,620 Well, I got a job interview. Big deal, too. 108 00:07:33,787 --> 00:07:37,332 It's more money. I'd be doing data reconfiguration and statistical factoring. 109 00:07:37,499 --> 00:07:42,546 - I think I know someone who does that. - Me. I do that. 110 00:07:42,921 --> 00:07:45,382 So seriously, do I look okay? I'm nervous. 111 00:07:45,549 --> 00:07:47,593 Oh, yeah. You— Really, you look great. 112 00:07:47,759 --> 00:07:50,429 You know, just don't get your hopes up. 113 00:07:51,638 --> 00:07:54,057 - Why not? - Well, the interview. 114 00:07:54,224 --> 00:07:55,809 - What about it? - You know. 115 00:07:55,976 --> 00:07:58,645 You don't make a very good first impression. 116 00:07:59,563 --> 00:08:02,608 - What? - Oh, you don't know. 117 00:08:03,358 --> 00:08:06,403 - Are you serious? - Yes. When I first met you, you were like: 118 00:08:07,905 --> 00:08:09,156 I was like: 119 00:08:09,323 --> 00:08:10,991 Shh! 120 00:08:13,744 --> 00:08:15,537 What is it that I do? 121 00:08:15,704 --> 00:08:19,249 It's just, like, you're trying too hard, always making jokes. 122 00:08:19,416 --> 00:08:22,127 You just— You come off a little needy. 123 00:08:22,294 --> 00:08:24,588 Did you like me when we first met? 124 00:08:25,088 --> 00:08:27,841 Chandler, I'm not gonna lie to you. 125 00:08:28,008 --> 00:08:30,302 But I am gonna run away from you. 126 00:08:35,224 --> 00:08:38,227 Hi. I'm Monica Geller, chef at Allessandro's. 127 00:08:38,393 --> 00:08:40,479 Still? 128 00:08:40,646 --> 00:08:42,731 I think the things you said were unfair... 129 00:08:42,898 --> 00:08:46,276 and I would like you to give my bouillabaisse another chance. 130 00:08:46,443 --> 00:08:49,404 I don't see any reason why I'd do that to myself again. 131 00:08:49,571 --> 00:08:52,282 Either eat it or be in it. 132 00:08:53,283 --> 00:08:54,493 SP0on? 133 00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:02,292 - So, what do you think? - I'm torn... 134 00:09:02,459 --> 00:09:06,296 between my integrity and my desire to avoid a beating. 135 00:09:07,381 --> 00:09:11,426 But I must be honest. Your soup is abysmal. 136 00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:19,518 Thattagirll Eh? We should get out of here, there's a new class coming in. 137 00:09:19,685 --> 00:09:22,354 Welcome to Introduction to Cooking. Before we start... 138 00:09:22,521 --> 00:09:26,316 can anyone tell me the difference between hollandaise and béarnaise sauce? 139 00:09:28,902 --> 00:09:31,071 - I can. - Okay, go ahead. 140 00:09:31,238 --> 00:09:34,825 Well, um, they both have a egg yolk and butter base. 141 00:09:34,992 --> 00:09:39,913 But a béarnaise, um, has shallots, chervil, and most importantly, tarragon. 142 00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:42,874 - Ha, ha, very good. What's your name? - Monica. 143 00:09:43,041 --> 00:09:47,004 - Monica, you go to the head of the class! - Okay! 144 00:09:49,881 --> 00:09:52,384 All this stuff takes up a lot of room. 145 00:09:52,551 --> 00:09:56,179 Hey, how, uh, serious are you about keeping Ben in your life? 146 00:09:56,888 --> 00:09:58,807 My son? Pretty serious. 147 00:10:06,565 --> 00:10:09,026 Oh, hey, Katie. What are you doing here? 148 00:10:09,192 --> 00:10:12,029 The delivery went out and I realized they forgot this. 149 00:10:12,195 --> 00:10:16,575 Ah, it must have been obvious, since it was the only thing left in your store. 150 00:10:18,201 --> 00:10:24,124 Listen, to be honest, home deliveries aren't really part of my job description. 151 00:10:24,291 --> 00:10:25,709 Oh. 152 00:10:26,668 --> 00:10:31,340 Oh, um, I actually came here to ask you out. 153 00:10:31,506 --> 00:10:35,927 Oh. Wow. Uh, yeah, that sounds great. 154 00:10:36,094 --> 00:10:42,351 I'm just gonna put this back in my pocket and pretend that didn't happen. 155 00:10:42,517 --> 00:10:45,312 Uh, I'm free now. You want to grab some coffee—? 156 00:10:45,479 --> 00:10:48,732 - Sure. - Horny bitch. 157 00:10:51,985 --> 00:10:56,114 No, you're a horny bitch! No, you're a horny bitch! 158 00:10:56,281 --> 00:10:59,201 No, you're a horny bitch! 159 00:11:01,745 --> 00:11:03,914 So you guys go, have a really good time. 160 00:11:04,081 --> 00:11:07,668 I'm just gonna grab my coat. And, uh, my whip. 161 00:11:09,086 --> 00:11:10,962 You know, because of Indiana Jones. 162 00:11:14,132 --> 00:11:18,011 Not because I'm into S&M. 163 00:11:18,178 --> 00:11:20,722 I'm not into anything weird, you know? Heh. 164 00:11:20,889 --> 00:11:23,308 Just normal sex. 165 00:11:26,728 --> 00:11:29,106 So I'm gonna grab my coat. 166 00:11:33,276 --> 00:11:39,241 So you had a good day, huh? Big commission, picked up a daddy. 167 00:11:40,242 --> 00:11:42,285 Are you okay with this? 168 00:11:42,452 --> 00:11:45,455 Oh, yeah. Yeah, please. You guys have fun. 169 00:11:46,206 --> 00:11:47,666 - Okay. Heh. - Yeah. 170 00:11:47,833 --> 00:11:49,000 It was nice to see you. 171 00:11:49,167 --> 00:11:52,212 Oh, and it was great to see you too. And you look fantastic. 172 00:11:52,379 --> 00:11:55,632 - Ah, heh. - Although you missed a button. 173 00:11:55,799 --> 00:11:57,801 Oh, actually, I, um... 174 00:11:57,968 --> 00:12:00,095 Oh, okay, I see what you're doing there. 175 00:12:03,765 --> 00:12:06,893 I can't even believe this. I really come off that badly? 176 00:12:07,060 --> 00:12:10,564 Ugh, it's okay. You calm down after a while... 177 00:12:10,731 --> 00:12:14,234 and then people can see how sweet and wonderful you are. 178 00:12:14,401 --> 00:12:18,155 Good. Because I'm sure this interview's gonna last a couple of weeks. 179 00:12:18,321 --> 00:12:22,659 All right, don't freak out, okay? I will help you. 180 00:12:22,826 --> 00:12:26,538 - How long before you have to leave? - An hour. 181 00:12:26,747 --> 00:12:29,374 - I can't help you. - Phoebe— 182 00:12:29,541 --> 00:12:34,963 We'll do our best. I'm the interviewer and I'm meeting you for the first time. 183 00:12:35,130 --> 00:12:39,259 - Okay. - Hi. Come on in. I'm Regina Phalanges. 184 00:12:40,343 --> 00:12:42,262 - Chandler Bing. - Oh, Bing. 185 00:12:42,429 --> 00:12:46,266 - What an unusual name. - Well, you should meet my Uncle Bada. 186 00:12:52,439 --> 00:12:55,066 I'll let myself out. 187 00:13:00,030 --> 00:13:01,072 H93'- 188 00:13:01,281 --> 00:13:04,409 Your alfredo's dry. Did you use your cheese? 189 00:13:04,618 --> 00:13:09,790 When you say "use," do you mean "eat as a pre-cooking snack"? 190 00:13:10,415 --> 00:13:13,668 - And the cream? - Cheese makes me thirsty. 191 00:13:15,420 --> 00:13:19,049 - Okay. Let's move on. - All right. 192 00:13:19,216 --> 00:13:24,012 Oh. Something smells good over at Monica's station. 193 00:13:25,055 --> 00:13:29,059 My God! This is absolutely amazing! You've never made this before? 194 00:13:29,226 --> 00:13:31,561 Oh, no. I don't know anything about cooking. 195 00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:37,484 I had to ask what it was called when the water makes those bubbles. 196 00:13:38,151 --> 00:13:39,986 Wow. Hats off to the chef. 197 00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:43,198 I'm sorry, your mouth was full. I didn't hear what you said. 198 00:13:43,365 --> 00:13:45,450 - Hats off to who now? - The chef! 199 00:13:45,617 --> 00:13:47,953 Heh, that's right! 200 00:13:49,788 --> 00:13:53,208 I think you'll find if I work here that I don't micromanage. 201 00:13:53,375 --> 00:13:55,460 I don't shy away from delegating. 202 00:13:55,627 --> 00:13:59,548 Mm-hm. That's good to know. But let's stop focusing on what you don't do... 203 00:13:59,714 --> 00:14:01,591 and focus on what you do do. 204 00:14:05,846 --> 00:14:07,806 What I do do... 205 00:14:10,267 --> 00:14:13,436 is manage to, uh, create an atmosphere of support... 206 00:14:13,603 --> 00:14:15,230 for the people working with me. 207 00:14:15,397 --> 00:14:18,066 I see. Nice sidestep on the "do do" thing. 208 00:14:18,233 --> 00:14:21,987 - Hardest thing I've ever done in my life. - Oh, you gotta go! 209 00:14:22,153 --> 00:14:24,906 - Okay, don't worry. You're ready. - Really? 210 00:14:25,073 --> 00:14:28,869 Absolutely! Just fight all your natural instincts, and you'll be great. 211 00:14:31,580 --> 00:14:33,915 Ah, Monica, my star student. 212 00:14:34,082 --> 00:14:35,792 Heh. You called me that before... 213 00:14:35,959 --> 00:14:39,546 so I took the liberty of fashioning a star out of foil. 214 00:14:39,713 --> 00:14:43,008 Now, no pressure. If you like my cookies, you give me the star. 215 00:14:46,511 --> 00:14:48,722 Mm. Mm-mm-mm. 216 00:14:48,889 --> 00:14:51,349 Wow, a star! 217 00:14:51,516 --> 00:14:55,729 I know you all hate me, and I'm sorry, but I don't care. 218 00:14:56,688 --> 00:14:59,524 - Okay, Joey, you're up next. - Yeah. 219 00:15:01,943 --> 00:15:05,113 Oh, my God! This is amazing! 220 00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:07,240 You get an A. 221 00:15:07,407 --> 00:15:11,995 I got an A? In school? Hey, I'm a dork! 222 00:15:13,455 --> 00:15:15,582 Joey, I'm so proud of you. 223 00:15:15,749 --> 00:15:18,919 - I think you should give him your star. - Excuse me? 224 00:15:20,503 --> 00:15:23,256 - He doesn't even know what he's doing. - We're all beginners. 225 00:15:23,423 --> 00:15:26,635 - Nobody knows what they're doing. - I do. I'm a professional chef! 226 00:15:28,178 --> 00:15:31,139 Oh, relax. It's not a courtroom drama. 227 00:15:31,306 --> 00:15:34,225 What are you doing taking Introduction to Cooking? 228 00:15:34,392 --> 00:15:36,102 Yeah! 229 00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:41,650 I'm sorry. It's just that, um, I cook at this restaurant, Allessandrds... 230 00:15:41,816 --> 00:15:43,777 and, um, I just got a really bad review. 231 00:15:43,944 --> 00:15:46,988 - Oh, Allessandro's? I love that place! - You do? 232 00:15:47,155 --> 00:15:50,241 Yes, you're an excellent chef. As a person you're a little— 233 00:15:50,408 --> 00:15:54,329 - Oh, totally crazy, but you liked the food? - Ha, ha. Very much. 234 00:15:54,496 --> 00:15:58,416 Okay, then. I don't stink. I'm a good chef! Okay. 235 00:15:58,583 --> 00:16:01,628 Whoa, whoa, whoa, I don't want to go. I'm having fun. 236 00:16:01,795 --> 00:16:04,381 Actually, did either of you pay for this class? 237 00:16:04,547 --> 00:16:07,217 Hey, if my friend says it's time to go, it's time to go! 238 00:16:16,059 --> 00:16:18,853 Also, I was the point person on my company's transition... 239 00:16:19,020 --> 00:16:21,731 from the KL5 to GR6 systems. 240 00:16:21,940 --> 00:16:26,319 - You must have had your hands full. - That I did. That I did. 241 00:16:26,820 --> 00:16:29,572 So let's talk a little bit about your duties. 242 00:16:34,452 --> 00:16:36,121 My duties? 243 00:16:39,791 --> 00:16:40,917 All right. 244 00:16:41,126 --> 00:16:44,337 You'll be heading a whole division, so you'll have a lot of duties. 245 00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:51,886 - I see. - But there'll be 30 people under you... 246 00:16:52,053 --> 00:16:54,514 so you can dump a certain amount on them. 247 00:16:59,477 --> 00:17:02,647 - Good to know. - We could go into detail— 248 00:17:02,856 --> 00:17:04,858 No, don't, I beg of you. 249 00:17:05,025 --> 00:17:08,903 All right, then. We'll have a definite answer for you on Monday. 250 00:17:09,070 --> 00:17:13,324 But I can say with some confidence, you'll fit in well here. 251 00:17:13,491 --> 00:17:16,536 - Really? - Absolutely. 252 00:17:17,579 --> 00:17:20,707 - You can relax. You did great. - I gotta say, thank you. 253 00:17:20,874 --> 00:17:24,711 I was really nervous. I'm told I come on too strongly, too many jokes. 254 00:17:24,878 --> 00:17:27,964 And then it was really hard to side step that "duty" thing. 255 00:17:30,133 --> 00:17:31,843 Duties? 256 00:17:33,094 --> 00:17:34,888 Doodies? 257 00:17:36,473 --> 00:17:37,807 Poo? 258 00:17:39,851 --> 00:17:41,561 Poo? 259 00:17:43,229 --> 00:17:47,567 Oh, my God. This doesn't count. Okay? The interview was over. 260 00:17:47,734 --> 00:17:51,529 That was the real Chandler Bing. This is some crazy guy in the hall. 261 00:17:51,696 --> 00:17:55,241 Call security! There's a crazy guy out in the hall! 262 00:17:56,409 --> 00:17:58,161 Poo? 263 00:17:59,079 --> 00:18:00,997 I'll look forward to your call. 264 00:18:07,587 --> 00:18:09,130 - Hey! - Hey! 265 00:18:09,297 --> 00:18:11,424 - You're back from your date. - How are you? 266 00:18:11,591 --> 00:18:16,346 I'm fine. But that's not important. What's important is how was she? 267 00:18:17,055 --> 00:18:19,724 Uh, it was fun. We just had coffee. 268 00:18:19,891 --> 00:18:24,521 Oh, uh-huh, uh-huh, coffee, a little rub-rub-rub under the table? 269 00:18:25,271 --> 00:18:28,399 Heh, what's going on? Do you not like Katie? 270 00:18:28,566 --> 00:18:31,027 No. No, she was nice. 271 00:18:31,194 --> 00:18:33,905 I mean, she was a little slutty, but who isn't? 272 00:18:34,823 --> 00:18:36,074 Well, I liked her. 273 00:18:36,241 --> 00:18:41,162 Of course you did. You'd date a gorilla if it called you Indiana Jones. 274 00:18:42,247 --> 00:18:45,416 Did you get a fresh batch of pregnancy hormones today? 275 00:18:46,334 --> 00:18:49,921 No. It's just that— Katie bothered me. 276 00:18:50,088 --> 00:18:51,422 Why? What was wrong with her? 277 00:18:52,882 --> 00:18:56,636 Ugh, there was nothing wrong with her. All right? She was perfectly lovely. 278 00:18:56,803 --> 00:18:59,556 - Okay. So, what's the matter? - I don't want you to date her. 279 00:19:01,057 --> 00:19:04,435 Heh, what? Why? What, are you jealous? 280 00:19:04,602 --> 00:19:08,606 Yes. And not because I want you to go out with me. 281 00:19:08,773 --> 00:19:11,109 Because I don't want you to go out with anybody. 282 00:19:12,443 --> 00:19:16,406 I know it's a terrible thing to even think this and it's inappropriate... 283 00:19:16,573 --> 00:19:21,161 but I want you to be at my constant beck and call, 24 hours a day. 284 00:19:21,995 --> 00:19:25,582 I'm very sorry, but that is just the way that I feel. 285 00:19:29,127 --> 00:19:31,504 - Okay. - What? 286 00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:35,466 I won't date. I'll, uh... 287 00:19:35,633 --> 00:19:38,761 I'll be here with you all the time. 288 00:19:40,513 --> 00:19:41,973 Really? 289 00:19:43,433 --> 00:19:45,727 But I'm being so unreasonable. 290 00:19:47,854 --> 00:19:52,734 True, but you're allowed to be unreasonable. You're having our baby. 291 00:19:55,737 --> 00:19:57,363 Oh... 292 00:19:57,530 --> 00:20:01,034 Oh, Ross, thank you. Thank you. 293 00:20:04,412 --> 00:20:06,873 You feel better? 294 00:20:07,165 --> 00:20:11,211 No, not really. You're pressing the baby into my bladder... 295 00:20:11,377 --> 00:20:13,713 and now I have to pee. Sorry. 296 00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:15,006 - Okay. - Rash? 297 00:20:15,173 --> 00:20:18,635 - Yeah? - Just one thing. Um... 298 00:20:19,385 --> 00:20:25,266 We live together. You're having our baby. I'm not gonna see anybody else. 299 00:20:25,433 --> 00:20:28,895 Are you sure you don't want something more? 300 00:20:32,023 --> 00:20:36,069 Wow. I don't know, maybe— 301 00:20:36,236 --> 00:20:38,738 Oh, Rach, I was just messing around. Heh. 302 00:20:41,074 --> 00:20:45,328 - Like you did when I had to pee? - Oh! Ha! I knew that. 303 00:20:45,495 --> 00:20:47,664 I knew that! I was just messing with you too! 304 00:20:51,084 --> 00:20:54,170 Okay. Because for a minute you seemed... 305 00:20:54,337 --> 00:20:57,298 - No, no, no, no. No! It's just— Ha! - ... like you actually... 306 00:20:57,465 --> 00:20:59,133 That's just because I'm such a good messer! 307 00:20:59,300 --> 00:21:00,510 Ah! Ah, heh. 308 00:21:06,975 --> 00:21:08,059 - Rash? - Yeah? 309 00:21:08,226 --> 00:21:09,352 - The bathroom? - Right. 310 00:21:14,524 --> 00:21:17,652 I had a great time. I learned how to bake, ate great food. 311 00:21:17,860 --> 00:21:22,323 The first A I've gotten since 7th grade and I didn't have to sleep with the teacher. 312 00:21:23,741 --> 00:21:26,828 - Oh, look. Acting for Beginners. - Yeah. 313 00:21:26,995 --> 00:21:28,663 Wanna feel good about yourself? 314 00:21:28,830 --> 00:21:30,832 - What the hell! - Okay. 315 00:21:30,999 --> 00:21:33,376 All right, let's start with some basics. 316 00:21:33,584 --> 00:21:39,299 Can anybody tell me what the difference between upstage and downstage is? 317 00:21:45,305 --> 00:21:48,182 Yeah, this was a stupid idea.