1 00:00:12,672 --> 00:00:14,757 Halt! 2 00:00:14,840 --> 00:00:16,133 I've got to hand it to this perp. 3 00:00:16,217 --> 00:00:18,511 No one's broken out of the Infinetentiary before. 4 00:00:18,594 --> 00:00:21,889 He's either the bravest time-convict I've ever seen or the dumbest. 5 00:00:22,890 --> 00:00:24,934 Ow! Ohh! 6 00:00:25,017 --> 00:00:26,102 My time-knee! 7 00:00:26,185 --> 00:00:28,437 Oh, time-dang it! 8 00:00:28,521 --> 00:00:30,189 - Definitely the dumbest. - Freeze! 9 00:00:30,272 --> 00:00:34,527 You're surrounded by the Time Paradox Avoidance Enforcement Squadron. 10 00:00:34,610 --> 00:00:38,948 Anything you say can and already has been used against you in future court. 11 00:00:39,031 --> 00:00:41,283 This is it, Blendin. End of the timeline. 12 00:00:41,367 --> 00:00:43,244 Any last words? 13 00:00:43,327 --> 00:00:46,038 Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh… I-I-I-I… 14 00:00:46,122 --> 00:00:49,709 I invoke Globnar! 15 00:00:49,792 --> 00:00:52,044 Globnar? 16 00:00:52,128 --> 00:00:55,464 Very well, speak the name and century of those accused. 17 00:00:55,548 --> 00:00:57,508 The two kids that ruined my life, 18 00:00:57,591 --> 00:01:00,886 Dipper and Mabel Pines, 21st century. 19 00:01:06,642 --> 00:01:07,852 So be it. 20 00:01:08,060 --> 00:01:11,605 May Time Baby have mercy on their souls. 21 00:01:57,109 --> 00:01:58,694 - Candy! Candy! - Candy! Candy. 22 00:01:58,778 --> 00:01:59,779 - Candy… - Candy… 23 00:01:59,862 --> 00:02:01,697 No! It's trapped! 24 00:02:01,781 --> 00:02:03,783 Everything is terrible forever! 25 00:02:03,866 --> 00:02:04,992 Psst. Hey, dudes. 26 00:02:05,075 --> 00:02:06,076 You want to know a trick? 27 00:02:06,160 --> 00:02:07,703 Boppity-boop-womp! 28 00:02:07,787 --> 00:02:09,288 A genius taught me that once. 29 00:02:09,371 --> 00:02:13,793 This just in. Weather stations are calling for a candy blizzard! 30 00:02:13,876 --> 00:02:14,936 Forget taking off the wrappers. 31 00:02:14,960 --> 00:02:17,963 I'm eating these now! 32 00:02:18,047 --> 00:02:20,883 Soos, you are the greatest human ever to live. 33 00:02:22,176 --> 00:02:24,094 That was a mistake! 34 00:02:24,178 --> 00:02:25,513 Hey, no sweat, dude. 35 00:02:25,596 --> 00:02:26,948 I'd do anything for the Pines family. 36 00:02:26,972 --> 00:02:28,265 Soos! 37 00:02:28,349 --> 00:02:31,060 I need to scratch myself in two places at once. 38 00:02:31,143 --> 00:02:32,394 And I mean anything. 39 00:02:32,478 --> 00:02:34,146 Coming, Mr. Pines! 40 00:02:35,940 --> 00:02:37,817 Whoa, better make sure he gets his wallet back. 41 00:02:37,900 --> 00:02:41,070 Wait, I've never seen Soos's wallet before. 42 00:02:41,153 --> 00:02:43,823 Don't you want to learn some Soos secrets? 43 00:02:43,906 --> 00:02:46,033 I don't know if we should be… Whoa! 44 00:02:46,116 --> 00:02:48,160 Soos has a membership to laser tag? 45 00:02:48,244 --> 00:02:49,995 I didn't know they let grown-ups in there. 46 00:02:50,079 --> 00:02:52,790 And look, emergency salami. 47 00:02:52,873 --> 00:02:55,417 Soos, my respect for you has grown. 48 00:02:55,501 --> 00:02:58,254 Jesus Alzamirano Ramirez, 49 00:02:58,337 --> 00:03:00,798 organ donor, July 13th. 50 00:03:01,006 --> 00:03:02,132 Wait a minute. 51 00:03:02,216 --> 00:03:03,202 That's today. 52 00:03:03,217 --> 00:03:05,094 - Whoa. - That's weird. 53 00:03:05,177 --> 00:03:06,321 I wonder why he didn't tell anyone. 54 00:03:06,345 --> 00:03:07,555 Uh, duh. 55 00:03:07,638 --> 00:03:09,032 It's probably because he wants someone 56 00:03:09,056 --> 00:03:10,891 to throw him a surprise party. 57 00:03:10,975 --> 00:03:12,268 I can relate. 58 00:03:12,351 --> 00:03:14,431 I've been waiting for a surprise party my whole life. 59 00:03:14,478 --> 00:03:16,063 Surprise! 60 00:03:17,231 --> 00:03:19,108 Too little, too late, Chiu. 61 00:03:19,191 --> 00:03:20,442 Ohh. 62 00:03:23,112 --> 00:03:24,780 More exclamation points! 63 00:03:24,864 --> 00:03:26,490 More, I say! 64 00:03:26,574 --> 00:03:28,492 Wow, you guys thought of everything. 65 00:03:28,576 --> 00:03:31,078 Grenda, twins are born birthday experts. 66 00:03:31,161 --> 00:03:32,347 We've shared every birthday together 67 00:03:32,371 --> 00:03:33,873 so we know how to make them perfect. 68 00:03:36,834 --> 00:03:37,835 Hey, places, everyone. 69 00:03:37,918 --> 00:03:38,919 I hear footsteps. 70 00:03:39,003 --> 00:03:41,380 Everyone, be quiet! 71 00:03:41,463 --> 00:03:43,507 All right, you promised a giant hummingbird, 72 00:03:43,632 --> 00:03:45,843 so I'm expecting to see a giant hummingbird. 73 00:03:45,926 --> 00:03:48,512 Three, two, one… 74 00:03:48,596 --> 00:03:50,139 Huh? 75 00:03:50,222 --> 00:03:51,515 Surprise! 76 00:03:51,599 --> 00:03:53,809 Happy birthday, you king on earth. 77 00:03:53,893 --> 00:03:55,185 We got everything you love. 78 00:03:55,269 --> 00:03:56,687 Cake-flavored pizza. 79 00:03:56,770 --> 00:03:57,980 Pizza-flavored cake. 80 00:03:58,063 --> 00:03:59,189 And one more treat. 81 00:04:00,774 --> 00:04:02,818 Razzle dazzle, friends. 82 00:04:02,902 --> 00:04:05,654 It's me, the Razz Dazzler. 83 00:04:05,738 --> 00:04:07,990 This is what my life has become. 84 00:04:08,073 --> 00:04:10,326 I… I… 85 00:04:10,409 --> 00:04:11,994 Quick, everyone pose 86 00:04:12,077 --> 00:04:13,829 for the Birthday Smiles Memory Album. 87 00:04:13,913 --> 00:04:16,749 D Razzly-dazzly-doo d. 88 00:04:19,543 --> 00:04:21,045 Soos, what's wrong? 89 00:04:21,128 --> 00:04:22,796 It's, uh, it's nothing. 90 00:04:22,880 --> 00:04:23,964 I, uh… 91 00:04:24,048 --> 00:04:26,133 I gotta go fix a pipe or something. 92 00:04:28,552 --> 00:04:29,887 Whoa, did you guys see Soos? 93 00:04:29,970 --> 00:04:31,639 What happened to… Oh, no. 94 00:04:31,722 --> 00:04:33,057 Oh, no, no, no. 95 00:04:33,140 --> 00:04:35,726 Okay, you guys didn't know, so it's not your fault, 96 00:04:35,809 --> 00:04:37,561 but Soos hates his birthday. 97 00:04:37,645 --> 00:04:39,730 - What? - It's a total mystery. 98 00:04:39,813 --> 00:04:41,625 I guess he's been like this since he was a kid. 99 00:04:41,649 --> 00:04:43,567 Some weird personal biz. 100 00:04:43,651 --> 00:04:45,819 There's gotta be something we can do. 101 00:04:45,903 --> 00:04:47,446 We've tried everything. 102 00:04:47,529 --> 00:04:48,809 I even petitioned the government 103 00:04:48,864 --> 00:04:50,449 to have this day removed from calendars. 104 00:04:50,532 --> 00:04:52,201 Now I'm not allowed on airplanes. 105 00:04:57,289 --> 00:04:58,540 I don't know, guys, 106 00:04:58,624 --> 00:05:00,501 maybe we should just leave him alone, you know? 107 00:05:00,584 --> 00:05:02,294 No one should be alone on their birthday. 108 00:05:02,378 --> 00:05:03,938 There's got to be a way to cheer him up. 109 00:05:04,004 --> 00:05:05,255 We just need to try harder. 110 00:05:05,339 --> 00:05:06,840 You're right, Dipper! 111 00:05:06,924 --> 00:05:09,635 It's time for us to bring out the big guns. 112 00:05:11,637 --> 00:05:12,972 All right, guys, 113 00:05:13,055 --> 00:05:14,431 blindfold me once, shame on you, 114 00:05:14,515 --> 00:05:16,225 blindfold me twice… Wait a minute. 115 00:05:16,308 --> 00:05:17,810 Hot dog smell? 116 00:05:17,893 --> 00:05:20,145 Sticky floors? Future sounds? 117 00:05:22,022 --> 00:05:23,273 Laser tag? 118 00:05:23,357 --> 00:05:24,775 I love laser tag. 119 00:05:24,858 --> 00:05:26,026 How did you guys know? 120 00:05:26,110 --> 00:05:28,696 We definitely didn't rifle through your wallet. 121 00:05:30,948 --> 00:05:32,700 Welcome to the year 8,000. 122 00:05:32,783 --> 00:05:34,743 Society? Collapsed. 123 00:05:34,827 --> 00:05:36,829 Fog machines? Everywhere. 124 00:05:36,912 --> 00:05:39,748 Are these walls just mattresses spray-painted purple? 125 00:05:39,832 --> 00:05:41,672 I think this place used to be a mattress store. 126 00:05:41,750 --> 00:05:42,793 I don't know, guys, 127 00:05:42,876 --> 00:05:44,503 I'm not sure I'm up for this today. 128 00:05:44,586 --> 00:05:45,586 Don't worry, Soos. 129 00:05:45,629 --> 00:05:46,982 As soon as you start playing with us, 130 00:05:47,006 --> 00:05:48,382 you're gonna have a great time. 131 00:05:48,465 --> 00:05:49,967 We promise, no matter what happens 132 00:05:50,050 --> 00:05:51,427 we won't leave your side. 133 00:05:51,510 --> 00:05:54,013 Well, I guess, I could give it a shot. 134 00:05:54,096 --> 00:05:55,389 Prepare for laser battle 135 00:05:55,472 --> 00:05:56,849 in three, two… 136 00:05:59,601 --> 00:06:01,103 Uh-oh. 137 00:06:01,186 --> 00:06:04,064 Better tie down these cowboys. 138 00:06:07,192 --> 00:06:10,279 Whoa! This is even cooler than I imagined. 139 00:06:10,362 --> 00:06:13,240 Look how real these laser guys are. 140 00:06:14,491 --> 00:06:15,909 Kick deflected. 141 00:06:15,993 --> 00:06:18,162 Thank you for buying digicod, the smart codpiece. 142 00:06:18,245 --> 00:06:19,413 Wait, what? 143 00:06:19,496 --> 00:06:21,081 Oh, no. 144 00:06:21,165 --> 00:06:23,167 Soos! 145 00:06:23,250 --> 00:06:25,586 Mabel? Dipper? Dudes? 146 00:06:25,669 --> 00:06:27,004 Soos! 147 00:06:27,087 --> 00:06:30,049 Nice try, but that's solid time-tanium, kid. 148 00:06:30,132 --> 00:06:32,468 There's only one way out of here. 149 00:06:32,551 --> 00:06:34,136 Through me! 150 00:06:36,013 --> 00:06:38,098 Oh, uh, sorry. 151 00:06:38,182 --> 00:06:39,892 Come on. 152 00:06:39,975 --> 00:06:41,810 Through me! 153 00:06:41,894 --> 00:06:43,079 And that's what it would have been like 154 00:06:43,103 --> 00:06:45,981 if I'd just gotten it right the very first chance, 155 00:06:46,065 --> 00:06:47,274 but it's still as effective. 156 00:06:51,070 --> 00:06:52,613 The time traveler guy! 157 00:06:52,696 --> 00:06:55,032 What did you say your name was again? 158 00:06:55,115 --> 00:06:57,284 Blendo? Blondin? 159 00:06:57,367 --> 00:06:58,353 BlarBlar. 160 00:06:58,368 --> 00:06:59,368 There it is. 161 00:06:59,411 --> 00:07:00,411 It's Blendin! 162 00:07:00,454 --> 00:07:02,498 Blendin Blenjamin Blandin. 163 00:07:02,581 --> 00:07:05,292 How could you not know my name after you ruined my life? 164 00:07:06,335 --> 00:07:08,087 Initiate flashback! 165 00:07:08,170 --> 00:07:10,422 It was after you stole my time device 166 00:07:10,506 --> 00:07:12,174 to win your stupid pig. 167 00:07:12,257 --> 00:07:15,094 I was cast out of the time anomaly removal crew… 168 00:07:15,177 --> 00:07:16,762 My whole life's purpose. 169 00:07:16,845 --> 00:07:18,097 And then I was given 170 00:07:18,180 --> 00:07:20,724 ten squared life sentences in time prison. 171 00:07:20,808 --> 00:07:23,727 I've spent every day since then planning my vengeance. 172 00:07:25,896 --> 00:07:29,566 And now finally, it has come! 173 00:07:29,650 --> 00:07:30,919 Look, we're sorry about all that, 174 00:07:30,943 --> 00:07:32,128 but we're in the middle of something 175 00:07:32,152 --> 00:07:33,529 really important right now. 176 00:07:33,612 --> 00:07:34,947 It's our friend's birthday today, 177 00:07:35,030 --> 00:07:36,824 and we promised we wouldn't leave his side. 178 00:07:36,907 --> 00:07:39,993 What? You think some dumb birthday matters right now? 179 00:07:40,077 --> 00:07:41,453 Do you know where you are? 180 00:07:41,537 --> 00:07:44,581 Welcome to Globnar! 181 00:07:53,674 --> 00:07:55,425 Is this a reality show? 182 00:07:55,509 --> 00:07:57,261 Are we in Japan? 183 00:07:57,344 --> 00:08:01,056 It's gladiatorial time combat! 184 00:08:04,268 --> 00:08:07,604 The winner gets a precious time wish 185 00:08:07,688 --> 00:08:09,940 and then decides the loser's fate. 186 00:08:10,023 --> 00:08:11,692 N-n-no! Please! 187 00:08:16,155 --> 00:08:18,866 And the two of you are officially challenged. 188 00:08:18,949 --> 00:08:19,992 Dundgren! 189 00:08:20,075 --> 00:08:21,660 Get me my war paint. 190 00:08:21,743 --> 00:08:22,846 Dipper, we need a way out of here. 191 00:08:22,870 --> 00:08:23,871 But how? 192 00:08:26,874 --> 00:08:28,000 I have an idea. 193 00:08:28,083 --> 00:08:30,043 Hang in there, Soos, we're coming for you. 194 00:08:30,127 --> 00:08:32,087 Dipper? Mabel? 195 00:08:32,171 --> 00:08:33,172 Requesting back-up. 196 00:08:33,255 --> 00:08:34,423 Ah! Ah! 197 00:08:34,506 --> 00:08:35,966 Oh! Ah! Oh, no. 198 00:08:36,049 --> 00:08:37,926 Laser Robbie. 199 00:08:38,010 --> 00:08:40,095 Dudes? 200 00:08:43,056 --> 00:08:44,600 Oh, my stars. 201 00:08:44,683 --> 00:08:46,977 Could it be my little, um… 202 00:08:47,060 --> 00:08:48,896 Lolphy! 203 00:08:48,979 --> 00:08:50,439 It's me. 204 00:08:50,522 --> 00:08:56,486 Your great-great-great-great- great-great-great grandmother 205 00:08:56,945 --> 00:08:59,031 from the past times. 206 00:09:00,490 --> 00:09:01,700 Gam-Gam? 207 00:09:03,118 --> 00:09:04,119 Yeah, neon green is good. 208 00:09:04,203 --> 00:09:05,454 This is a good color for me. 209 00:09:05,537 --> 00:09:06,523 It's fierce… Huh? 210 00:09:06,538 --> 00:09:07,581 What? No! 211 00:09:07,664 --> 00:09:08,790 You can't let them escape! 212 00:09:08,874 --> 00:09:10,209 Stop them! 213 00:09:10,292 --> 00:09:11,960 Gam-Gam, how could you? 214 00:09:12,044 --> 00:09:14,630 I ain't no one's Gam-Gam, sucka! 215 00:09:14,713 --> 00:09:16,506 You just got time tricked! 216 00:09:16,632 --> 00:09:19,051 - No! - No! 217 00:09:19,134 --> 00:09:21,011 Hurry! Back to Soos' birthday. 218 00:09:21,094 --> 00:09:23,555 Okay. I think I've got it. 219 00:09:29,102 --> 00:09:30,938 Uhh. Are we back? 220 00:09:31,021 --> 00:09:34,066 Oh, no! Look! 221 00:09:34,149 --> 00:09:35,984 Mable, the Laser place is a mattress store. 222 00:09:36,068 --> 00:09:37,736 We went too far in the past. 223 00:09:37,819 --> 00:09:38,904 Time travel. 224 00:09:38,987 --> 00:09:41,823 Man, why you gotta be so complicated? 225 00:09:41,907 --> 00:09:43,825 Huh? 226 00:09:43,909 --> 00:09:46,662 Looks like they overshot their destination by 10 years. 227 00:09:46,745 --> 00:09:49,081 I don't see them. You better find those kids! 228 00:09:49,164 --> 00:09:50,916 You'll get your justice, Blendin. 229 00:09:50,999 --> 00:09:53,377 I'm gonna keep stammering until you find them. 230 00:09:53,460 --> 00:09:56,964 I-I-I-I… 231 00:09:57,047 --> 00:09:59,132 - I hate that guy. - Let's move. 232 00:10:01,843 --> 00:10:04,221 - Yeah! - Yeah! 233 00:10:04,304 --> 00:10:06,348 Okay, we just got to go forward 10 years. 234 00:10:06,431 --> 00:10:09,226 We can be back before Soos even realizes we were gone. 235 00:10:09,309 --> 00:10:11,561 Oh, no! The timey thing. 236 00:10:11,645 --> 00:10:12,813 It's busted. 237 00:10:12,896 --> 00:10:14,022 Can you fix it? 238 00:10:14,106 --> 00:10:16,024 Maybe. I'll need some tools. 239 00:10:16,108 --> 00:10:19,736 And I think I know where to get some. 240 00:10:21,697 --> 00:10:22,864 Let's try to lay low. 241 00:10:22,948 --> 00:10:24,449 We don't want to change the future. 242 00:10:24,533 --> 00:10:26,201 Or cause the future. 243 00:10:26,285 --> 00:10:27,786 I forget how this works exactly. 244 00:10:27,869 --> 00:10:29,788 Wow, 10 years in the past. 245 00:10:29,871 --> 00:10:32,874 Everything is same-y but also different-y. 246 00:10:32,958 --> 00:10:35,127 D Doppity-doppity-doo d. 247 00:10:35,210 --> 00:10:36,253 Yeah! 248 00:10:36,336 --> 00:10:40,674 Look out Broadway, here I come. 249 00:10:40,757 --> 00:10:43,260 This dream goes nowhere, Toby! 250 00:10:43,343 --> 00:10:45,595 Aww, marbles. 251 00:10:47,055 --> 00:10:48,807 - Whoa. - Oops. Sorry. 252 00:10:49,975 --> 00:10:50,994 My friend thinks you're cute. 253 00:10:51,018 --> 00:10:53,061 Oh, my gosh. Tambry, shut up. 254 00:10:53,145 --> 00:10:54,229 Ow! Hey! 255 00:10:54,313 --> 00:10:55,856 Thank you. 256 00:10:55,981 --> 00:10:59,026 I mean you're super young, so this is weird. 257 00:10:59,109 --> 00:11:01,028 Now you know how she feels, creep. 258 00:11:01,111 --> 00:11:03,238 Yeah, I… Huh. 259 00:11:03,322 --> 00:11:04,740 Wow. 260 00:11:04,823 --> 00:11:06,575 Wow. 261 00:11:06,658 --> 00:11:09,202 Schlep right up, ladies and gentlemen, 262 00:11:09,286 --> 00:11:10,662 to see my latest attraction. 263 00:11:10,746 --> 00:11:11,955 All right, the coast is clear. 264 00:11:12,039 --> 00:11:14,333 Now is our chance. 265 00:11:19,129 --> 00:11:21,340 Ha! Bingo! 266 00:11:21,423 --> 00:11:22,966 All right, let's see. 267 00:11:23,050 --> 00:11:24,301 Aw, come on, candy. 268 00:11:24,384 --> 00:11:26,553 Fall. Fall. 269 00:11:26,636 --> 00:11:27,971 Allow me. 270 00:11:28,055 --> 00:11:29,973 You just need to know a guy on the inside. 271 00:11:30,057 --> 00:11:32,184 Bippity-boop-womp! 272 00:11:32,267 --> 00:11:33,267 Jackpot! 273 00:11:35,228 --> 00:11:36,313 Thanks, dawg. 274 00:11:36,396 --> 00:11:38,857 You must be some kind of genius. 275 00:11:38,940 --> 00:11:40,984 All right, I think I've got this thing working 276 00:11:41,068 --> 00:11:42,861 Dipper, Dipper, look. 277 00:11:42,944 --> 00:11:44,780 No way. 278 00:11:46,323 --> 00:11:49,159 Mi precioso, you keep wandering off. 279 00:11:49,242 --> 00:11:50,922 You don't want to be late for your big day. 280 00:11:50,994 --> 00:11:53,038 Sorry, Abuelita. 281 00:11:53,121 --> 00:11:54,206 Big day? 282 00:11:54,289 --> 00:11:55,707 This could be the birthday 283 00:11:55,791 --> 00:11:57,667 where that personal biz went down. 284 00:11:57,751 --> 00:12:00,545 We could finally find out why Soos hates his birthday. 285 00:12:00,629 --> 00:12:02,756 All right, but let's be quick. 286 00:12:02,839 --> 00:12:05,008 I want a piece of birthday cake! 287 00:12:07,260 --> 00:12:09,763 Who's a handsome birthday boy? 288 00:12:09,846 --> 00:12:11,431 It's you! 289 00:12:11,515 --> 00:12:14,017 Soos, you are such a ladies' man. 290 00:12:14,101 --> 00:12:16,103 They're my cousins, Grandma. Gross. 291 00:12:16,186 --> 00:12:18,021 I got you a race car cake. 292 00:12:18,105 --> 00:12:20,023 Man, I don't know why Soos hates his birthdays. 293 00:12:20,107 --> 00:12:21,108 This looks great. 294 00:12:23,110 --> 00:12:24,945 Sorry, dude, but could you move seats? 295 00:12:25,028 --> 00:12:25,972 That's the seat of honor. 296 00:12:25,987 --> 00:12:27,572 Uh, who's it for? 297 00:12:27,656 --> 00:12:30,325 Oh. Heh. It's for my dad, actually. 298 00:12:30,409 --> 00:12:33,537 I haven't seen him in, like, 8 years, but he's coming today. 299 00:12:33,620 --> 00:12:35,705 That must be him! 300 00:12:43,046 --> 00:12:46,091 All right, Soos, today's the big day. 301 00:12:46,174 --> 00:12:48,176 Be cool. Be cool. 302 00:12:50,470 --> 00:12:52,305 Postcard for… 303 00:12:52,389 --> 00:12:54,349 Soos. 304 00:12:59,938 --> 00:13:01,606 "See you next year for sure. 305 00:13:01,690 --> 00:13:03,316 Dad." 306 00:13:03,400 --> 00:13:05,485 Hey, don't sweat it, cuz. 307 00:13:05,569 --> 00:13:06,778 You'll see him next year. 308 00:13:06,862 --> 00:13:10,115 Ha. Yeah, next year. 309 00:13:13,201 --> 00:13:14,995 I'm gonna go lay down. 310 00:13:15,078 --> 00:13:16,413 You party without me, dudes. 311 00:13:16,496 --> 00:13:17,789 Wait, what about your presents? 312 00:13:17,873 --> 00:13:19,040 Yay-uh. 313 00:13:22,043 --> 00:13:24,629 So that's why Soos hates his birthday. 314 00:13:24,713 --> 00:13:27,299 It's the day he realized his dad wasn't coming back. 315 00:13:27,382 --> 00:13:30,385 So how much partying can fix that? 316 00:13:30,469 --> 00:13:31,720 Dorks. 317 00:13:31,803 --> 00:13:33,013 Young Robbie. 318 00:13:36,224 --> 00:13:38,226 Ay, Soos' father is a dead-beat. 319 00:13:43,648 --> 00:13:48,069 Soos, I made you cookies shaped like dinosaurs. 320 00:13:48,153 --> 00:13:49,139 I don't want cookies. 321 00:13:49,154 --> 00:13:50,322 I want to see Dad again. 322 00:13:50,405 --> 00:13:51,781 And he wants to see you. 323 00:13:51,865 --> 00:13:53,783 He's just… busy. 324 00:13:53,909 --> 00:13:54,910 Busy in New Orleans. 325 00:13:55,035 --> 00:13:56,703 Ay. Yes. 326 00:13:56,786 --> 00:13:59,915 Trust me, you will feel better one day. 327 00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:03,919 Ohh, this is awful. 328 00:14:04,002 --> 00:14:05,629 We promised Soos a happy birthday, 329 00:14:05,712 --> 00:14:07,380 but how can we give him that now? 330 00:14:07,464 --> 00:14:09,716 This goes beyond anything we know how to fix. 331 00:14:09,799 --> 00:14:11,927 - This way! - Mabel, hide! 332 00:14:14,971 --> 00:14:16,598 They've got to be around here somewhere. 333 00:14:16,681 --> 00:14:18,099 I think I heard them! 334 00:14:18,183 --> 00:14:20,894 Freeze! 335 00:14:22,437 --> 00:14:24,439 Trace their chrono-signatures. 336 00:14:24,523 --> 00:14:27,859 Man, the sooner I defeat those kids in Globnar, 337 00:14:27,943 --> 00:14:29,903 the sooner I can win my time wish. 338 00:14:29,986 --> 00:14:31,905 Tell you what I'd do if I had a time wish. 339 00:14:31,988 --> 00:14:34,115 Retire early, spend more time with the kids. 340 00:14:34,199 --> 00:14:36,284 Nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah with the kids? 341 00:14:36,368 --> 00:14:38,995 Don't you know a time wish can literally do anything? 342 00:14:39,079 --> 00:14:41,998 Any impossible problem solved, just like that. 343 00:14:42,082 --> 00:14:43,583 I mean, imagine the possibilities. 344 00:14:43,667 --> 00:14:45,835 Wait, Mabel, that's it, the time wish. 345 00:14:45,919 --> 00:14:47,712 If we defeat Blendin in that space battle… 346 00:14:47,796 --> 00:14:48,922 Then we can wish 347 00:14:49,005 --> 00:14:51,174 that Soos' dad came to his 12th birthday. 348 00:14:51,258 --> 00:14:53,018 And Soos' birthdays would be fixed forever… 349 00:14:53,051 --> 00:14:54,177 All of them! 350 00:14:54,261 --> 00:14:56,846 But do you really think we can win Globnar? 351 00:14:56,930 --> 00:14:58,473 It's the only chance we have. 352 00:14:58,557 --> 00:15:01,017 Besides, it's for Soos. 353 00:15:01,101 --> 00:15:03,603 He would do the same for us. 354 00:15:05,981 --> 00:15:08,233 Here we are, Blendin. We surrender. 355 00:15:08,316 --> 00:15:10,110 - It's them! - Freeze! 356 00:15:10,193 --> 00:15:11,295 Careful, they're from the past. 357 00:15:11,319 --> 00:15:13,530 They might have powder muskets or slap bracelets. 358 00:15:13,613 --> 00:15:15,115 Look, guys, no tricks this time. 359 00:15:15,198 --> 00:15:16,866 We're ready to challenge you, okay? 360 00:15:16,950 --> 00:15:19,119 Yes! Let the Globnar begin. 361 00:15:19,202 --> 00:15:22,747 Prepare for Globnar! 362 00:15:24,958 --> 00:15:26,418 Hey, turns out I can mute him. 363 00:15:26,501 --> 00:15:28,128 Man, I wish we'd known that earlier. 364 00:15:28,211 --> 00:15:30,130 Initializing. 365 00:15:37,429 --> 00:15:41,766 Globnar! Globnar! Globnar! Globnar! 366 00:15:51,484 --> 00:15:53,069 Silence! 367 00:15:53,153 --> 00:15:54,613 Whoo! Oh, yeah! 368 00:15:56,489 --> 00:15:58,575 That is one big baby. 369 00:15:58,658 --> 00:16:00,410 Welcome, Globnar tributes. 370 00:16:00,493 --> 00:16:02,370 I have a very important nap to get to, 371 00:16:02,454 --> 00:16:03,913 so let's make this quick. 372 00:16:03,997 --> 00:16:06,291 You each have a chance to settle your time-feud 373 00:16:06,374 --> 00:16:08,752 through gladiatorial combat. 374 00:16:08,835 --> 00:16:10,754 You will have until time baby finishes 375 00:16:10,837 --> 00:16:13,381 drinking the cosmic sand in this hourglass. 376 00:16:13,465 --> 00:16:14,716 No! 377 00:16:14,799 --> 00:16:16,009 Come on. It's good for you. 378 00:16:16,092 --> 00:16:17,218 Waah! 379 00:16:17,302 --> 00:16:18,720 Get ready, kids. 380 00:16:18,803 --> 00:16:21,032 When I get that time wish, you'll wish you were never born. 381 00:16:21,056 --> 00:16:23,099 Or rather, you'll wish you were born, 382 00:16:23,183 --> 00:16:24,976 because I'm gonna wish you were never born! 383 00:16:25,060 --> 00:16:26,770 Dream on! There's two of us. 384 00:16:26,853 --> 00:16:28,396 And we have hair! 385 00:16:28,480 --> 00:16:29,564 Oh… oh, yeah? 386 00:16:29,648 --> 00:16:31,691 Well, I have training! 387 00:16:33,610 --> 00:16:35,737 What do you think I did in prison all that time? 388 00:16:35,820 --> 00:16:36,806 Uh-oh. 389 00:16:36,821 --> 00:16:39,449 Let the Globnar begin! 390 00:17:03,598 --> 00:17:04,808 Yeah! 391 00:17:16,444 --> 00:17:18,988 Globnar! 392 00:17:21,074 --> 00:17:22,367 Very good. 393 00:17:22,450 --> 00:17:24,577 You have escaped the Cyclocks. 394 00:17:24,661 --> 00:17:27,247 Yes! Blendin for the almost-win! 395 00:17:28,915 --> 00:17:31,835 There is only one final challenge for Globnar. 396 00:17:31,918 --> 00:17:35,004 An ancient game, thousands of years old, 397 00:17:35,088 --> 00:17:38,591 chosen for its exemplification of pure strategy. 398 00:17:38,675 --> 00:17:42,220 The ancient art of laser tag! 399 00:17:44,806 --> 00:17:48,017 The one who touches the victory orb first will win. 400 00:17:48,101 --> 00:17:51,104 Laser tag? Seriously? 401 00:17:51,187 --> 00:17:53,273 Oh, I know it doesn't seem that challenging now, 402 00:17:53,356 --> 00:17:55,900 but just wait until they turn on that fog machine. 403 00:17:55,984 --> 00:17:57,068 You'll be done for. 404 00:17:57,152 --> 00:17:58,236 You just wait until you… 405 00:17:58,319 --> 00:17:59,319 Hit. 406 00:17:59,362 --> 00:18:01,364 Hit, hit, hit, hit. 407 00:18:01,448 --> 00:18:02,449 Oh, man. 408 00:18:02,532 --> 00:18:03,908 Mabel, grab the orb! 409 00:18:03,992 --> 00:18:05,076 Got it. 410 00:18:08,079 --> 00:18:10,039 It is finished! 411 00:18:16,212 --> 00:18:17,630 No! 412 00:18:17,797 --> 00:18:18,840 No! No! 413 00:18:18,923 --> 00:18:19,826 - Yes! - Yes! 414 00:18:19,841 --> 00:18:22,552 You have made victory in Globnar. 415 00:18:22,635 --> 00:18:24,471 Before I give you your time wish, 416 00:18:24,554 --> 00:18:28,308 tell us what fate do you decide for the loser? 417 00:18:28,391 --> 00:18:29,976 Oh, jeez. 418 00:18:30,059 --> 00:18:31,978 Death! 419 00:18:32,061 --> 00:18:33,396 - Mabel. - Sorry. 420 00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:34,981 Got carried away. 421 00:18:35,064 --> 00:18:38,443 So Blendin did try to wish us out of existence, 422 00:18:38,526 --> 00:18:40,862 but it was kind of our fault for ruining his life. 423 00:18:40,945 --> 00:18:44,449 Yeah, and he's kind of too sad to be a real bad guy. 424 00:18:44,532 --> 00:18:46,409 Maybe if we treat him right in the present, 425 00:18:46,493 --> 00:18:48,161 he'll turn out better in the future. 426 00:18:48,244 --> 00:18:50,371 Okay, as long as you keep an eye on him, 427 00:18:50,455 --> 00:18:53,500 we'd like to set Blendin free and restore his position 428 00:18:53,583 --> 00:18:55,251 at the Time Anomaly Correction Unit. 429 00:18:55,335 --> 00:18:57,378 And give him pretty hair. 430 00:18:57,462 --> 00:18:58,880 So be it. 431 00:19:00,507 --> 00:19:03,176 What? You'd do that for me? 432 00:19:03,259 --> 00:19:05,011 I got my job back! 433 00:19:05,094 --> 00:19:06,638 I feel like hugging somebody. 434 00:19:06,721 --> 00:19:09,182 - I can kill you in eight different ways. - Yes, sir. 435 00:19:09,265 --> 00:19:14,312 Now, children, what is it that you want for your time wish? 436 00:19:14,395 --> 00:19:17,857 Thank you, but the wish isn't for us. 437 00:19:17,941 --> 00:19:19,192 Not you? 438 00:19:19,275 --> 00:19:21,110 But then who? 439 00:19:21,194 --> 00:19:24,364 Who is worthy to receive such power? 440 00:19:25,615 --> 00:19:27,242 Dipper? Mabel? 441 00:19:27,325 --> 00:19:28,618 Ah, who am I kidding? 442 00:19:28,701 --> 00:19:29,953 I'm not up for this. 443 00:19:31,079 --> 00:19:32,664 Heads, I stay. 444 00:19:32,747 --> 00:19:35,250 Tails, I go make myself some dinosaur shaped cookies. 445 00:19:42,340 --> 00:19:45,009 Huh. That's unconventional. 446 00:19:48,137 --> 00:19:49,806 - Soos! - Guys! 447 00:19:49,889 --> 00:19:51,933 We're so sorry we left you hanging, dude. 448 00:19:52,016 --> 00:19:54,185 We got caught up in this time travel junk. 449 00:19:54,269 --> 00:19:55,895 And there was a time Cyclops. 450 00:19:55,979 --> 00:19:56,965 And don't forget about the 451 00:19:56,980 --> 00:19:57,980 - time race. - Time race. 452 00:19:58,022 --> 00:19:59,858 But the point is, Soos, 453 00:19:59,941 --> 00:20:01,901 we think we know how to fix your birthday. 454 00:20:01,985 --> 00:20:03,444 Whoa. Really? 455 00:20:03,528 --> 00:20:06,656 Wait, you guys did all of that for me? 456 00:20:06,739 --> 00:20:07,949 And that's not all. 457 00:20:08,032 --> 00:20:10,577 Behold your time wish, 458 00:20:10,660 --> 00:20:14,914 the power to alter time, paradox-free, in any way you choose. 459 00:20:14,998 --> 00:20:17,560 We think the only thing that can make you happy is meeting your dad. 460 00:20:17,584 --> 00:20:19,210 But the choice is yours. 461 00:20:19,294 --> 00:20:21,838 You mean, I can finally see my dad by touching this thing? 462 00:20:21,921 --> 00:20:23,965 And you guys battled through time and space 463 00:20:24,048 --> 00:20:25,508 just to get this for me? 464 00:20:28,177 --> 00:20:29,929 What are you waiting for, Soos? 465 00:20:31,097 --> 00:20:33,182 All right. Here goes nothing. 466 00:20:38,313 --> 00:20:39,299 Wait, what? What the… 467 00:20:39,314 --> 00:20:40,523 Bam! Fixed you up. 468 00:20:40,607 --> 00:20:41,691 Enjoy, dudes. 469 00:20:41,774 --> 00:20:43,818 But, Soos, what about meeting your dad? 470 00:20:43,902 --> 00:20:46,112 Well, birthdays are supposed to be spent 471 00:20:46,195 --> 00:20:47,555 with the people who care about you. 472 00:20:47,614 --> 00:20:49,115 But you know what? 473 00:20:49,198 --> 00:20:51,051 That dude didn't care about me enough to visit me once, 474 00:20:51,075 --> 00:20:53,870 let alone fight monsters through time and space like you dudes. 475 00:20:53,953 --> 00:20:56,664 I mean, you had a gladiator fight just to make me happy. 476 00:20:56,748 --> 00:20:58,750 I've been being ridiculous this whole time. 477 00:20:58,833 --> 00:21:00,793 Whoever my dad was, he could take a hike. 478 00:21:00,877 --> 00:21:04,172 I know who my family is now, and it's you dudes. 479 00:21:04,255 --> 00:21:06,633 Thanks for giving me the best birthday ever. 480 00:21:06,716 --> 00:21:08,468 Are you kidding me? 481 00:21:08,551 --> 00:21:10,637 Do you have any idea what you've just wasted? 482 00:21:10,720 --> 00:21:12,889 Do you know how many have died to get a time wish? 483 00:21:12,972 --> 00:21:15,058 The wars that were started? 484 00:21:15,141 --> 00:21:16,085 Oh, that's not all, dudes. 485 00:21:16,100 --> 00:21:17,900 I also wished for the slice of infinite pizza. 486 00:21:17,977 --> 00:21:19,062 Watch. 487 00:21:21,105 --> 00:21:22,774 And it can do that for, like, infinity. 488 00:21:22,899 --> 00:21:24,275 - Nicely done. - Oh, okay, cool. 489 00:21:24,359 --> 00:21:25,944 Phew! That's a good time wish. 490 00:21:26,027 --> 00:21:27,947 There's still 10 minutes before laser tag closes. 491 00:21:27,987 --> 00:21:28,973 You dudes want to play? 492 00:21:28,988 --> 00:21:30,114 Yeah. 493 00:21:31,616 --> 00:21:33,785 Happy birthday, Soos. 494 00:21:33,868 --> 00:21:35,954 Whoa. Thought I heard an explosion. 495 00:21:36,037 --> 00:21:37,037 Whoa, what's this? 496 00:21:38,081 --> 00:21:40,249 Mystery Shack? 497 00:21:40,333 --> 00:21:41,459 That is it! 498 00:21:41,542 --> 00:21:42,794 You are single-handedly 499 00:21:42,877 --> 00:21:45,755 the worst handyman I've ever seen. 500 00:21:45,838 --> 00:21:47,507 Uh, hey, excuse me, sir. 501 00:21:47,590 --> 00:21:50,259 Hey you, gumdrop, think you can fix a golf cart? 502 00:21:50,343 --> 00:21:51,886 Well, I don't know if I… 503 00:21:52,011 --> 00:21:53,012 Boom, you're hired. 504 00:21:53,096 --> 00:21:55,098 One size fits all. 505 00:21:55,181 --> 00:21:56,891 Step right up to the Mystery Shack, folks. 506 00:21:56,975 --> 00:21:58,017 Step right up.