1 00:00:03,624 --> 00:00:04,625 All right, Stan. 2 00:00:04,750 --> 00:00:07,378 Another day, another random body pain. 3 00:00:07,461 --> 00:00:10,464 Here we go. 4 00:00:11,132 --> 00:00:12,133 Uhh! 5 00:00:12,800 --> 00:00:13,801 Dear Stan, 6 00:00:13,968 --> 00:00:16,762 I needed something to carry milk in, so I used your slippers. 7 00:00:16,846 --> 00:00:18,055 Love, Mabel. 8 00:00:29,984 --> 00:00:33,237 Dear Stan, I took these to build a planetarium suit for Soos. 9 00:00:33,321 --> 00:00:34,405 Sorry! Dipper. 10 00:00:38,993 --> 00:00:41,871 Whoa, let's not take this line. There's an old person in it. 11 00:00:41,954 --> 00:00:46,292 Pshtt! Yeah, he's probably gonna pay with, like, pennies and war bonds. 12 00:00:46,459 --> 00:00:49,420 Hey! For your information, I was gonna shoplift most of this! 13 00:00:49,503 --> 00:00:50,546 Security! 14 00:00:52,131 --> 00:00:54,133 Ha! Smoke bomb! 15 00:00:56,636 --> 00:00:58,304 Aw, seriously? 16 00:01:01,140 --> 00:01:03,225 Ahh. Rough start to a day, 17 00:01:03,392 --> 00:01:06,479 but it's all gonna be worth it when I fix that light bulb… 18 00:01:07,229 --> 00:01:08,689 And we're done. 19 00:01:10,441 --> 00:01:11,692 Does anyone see this? 20 00:01:11,776 --> 00:01:14,195 This is what a hero looks like right here. 21 00:01:14,362 --> 00:01:16,197 I thought we were out of light bulbs. 22 00:01:16,364 --> 00:01:18,574 Oh, we were. So I invented my own. 23 00:01:18,658 --> 00:01:20,034 It will last a thousand years, 24 00:01:20,117 --> 00:01:22,203 and the light it emits makes your skin softer. 25 00:01:22,370 --> 00:01:25,665 - Oh! Never have I known such softness. - Oooh! 26 00:01:25,748 --> 00:01:26,749 Anyway, where were you? 27 00:01:29,919 --> 00:01:32,963 Well, TV, at least you appreciate me. Give me the good news. 28 00:01:33,130 --> 00:01:35,758 This just in, the mayor is dead. 29 00:01:35,841 --> 00:01:38,135 - What? - Whoa! What's going on? 30 00:01:38,302 --> 00:01:39,887 Raised by bears in the wilderness, 31 00:01:39,970 --> 00:01:41,931 Mayor Eustace "Huckabone" Befufftlefumpter 32 00:01:42,014 --> 00:01:43,933 was best known for raising the water tower, 33 00:01:44,016 --> 00:01:45,810 possibly starting World War I, 34 00:01:45,976 --> 00:01:49,772 and putting town menace Gideon Gleeful behind bars… in actual adult prison. 35 00:01:51,190 --> 00:01:55,528 A memorial statue is already being carved in the deceased mayor's honor. 36 00:01:58,155 --> 00:02:01,409 I'm sorry. It's just been so long since we've had real news. 37 00:02:01,492 --> 00:02:03,703 I'm just so happy! 38 00:02:03,786 --> 00:02:07,164 There will be a town hall meeting this afternoon to discuss replacing him. 39 00:02:07,331 --> 00:02:08,332 New mayor, huh? 40 00:02:08,999 --> 00:02:10,668 Wonder who it could be… 41 00:02:29,228 --> 00:02:31,605 All right, order! Order, everyone! 42 00:02:31,689 --> 00:02:33,524 Calm down, now. 43 00:02:33,691 --> 00:02:37,069 We're here to choose a mayor for the first time in almost a century. 44 00:02:37,153 --> 00:02:39,905 According to the town charter 45 00:02:39,989 --> 00:02:43,492 a worthy candidate is defined as anyone who can cast a shadow, 46 00:02:43,576 --> 00:02:46,328 count to ten, and throw their hat into the provided ring. 47 00:02:48,873 --> 00:02:52,501 Well, now, I do believe I fulfill all the requirements. 48 00:02:52,668 --> 00:02:54,003 Wait. Bud Gleeful? 49 00:02:54,128 --> 00:02:57,089 He looks good, considering we threw his son in jail. 50 00:02:57,173 --> 00:02:58,340 That was a good day. 51 00:02:58,507 --> 00:03:00,968 Now, folks, I know our family has had its fair share 52 00:03:01,051 --> 00:03:02,511 of whoopsie-daisies in the past, 53 00:03:02,595 --> 00:03:06,682 but I'd like to make up for it by formally announcing my candidacy 54 00:03:06,766 --> 00:03:08,726 for the mayor of Gravity Falls! 55 00:03:08,893 --> 00:03:10,394 - Any questions? - Yes. 56 00:03:10,478 --> 00:03:13,147 Are you still in contact with Little Gideon? 57 00:03:13,314 --> 00:03:14,857 That's a great question! 58 00:03:14,940 --> 00:03:17,401 I'm giving you 50 percent off a used car. 59 00:03:17,568 --> 00:03:20,821 Fifty percent? Fifty percent? 60 00:03:20,988 --> 00:03:23,449 In fact, everyone look under your seats. 61 00:03:23,532 --> 00:03:25,075 You get half off a used car. 62 00:03:25,242 --> 00:03:27,578 - You get half off a used car. - Better than cash! 63 00:03:28,245 --> 00:03:32,291 Wow! A colorful piece of paper! He's got my vote. 64 00:03:32,374 --> 00:03:35,211 Guys, I've got a really bad feeling about Bud Gleeful as mayor. 65 00:03:35,377 --> 00:03:38,839 I don't know, dude, it's not like we have a lot of good mayor options. 66 00:03:38,923 --> 00:03:40,758 Everyone in this town is a tad strange, 67 00:03:40,841 --> 00:03:43,135 except, ironically, Tad Strange. 68 00:03:43,302 --> 00:03:46,597 Hi, guys. Tad's the name, and being normal is my game. 69 00:03:46,680 --> 00:03:48,098 Loving you, Tad! 70 00:03:48,182 --> 00:03:49,475 And I love bread. 71 00:03:50,059 --> 00:03:51,519 It's a shame Ford isn't here. 72 00:03:51,602 --> 00:03:54,730 He'd run and win, and be a great mayor. 73 00:03:55,981 --> 00:03:57,441 So, since everyone's happy, 74 00:03:57,525 --> 00:03:59,902 I'll just take the oath of office now, sound good? Gavel up. 75 00:04:01,070 --> 00:04:03,113 Hold it right there, Bud! 76 00:04:03,197 --> 00:04:05,199 I'm taking you on! 77 00:04:05,366 --> 00:04:07,451 Stanford? No offense, 78 00:04:07,535 --> 00:04:09,787 but you're just some two-bit carnival barker, 79 00:04:09,870 --> 00:04:12,206 and your head is more ears than face! 80 00:04:12,373 --> 00:04:17,419 Oh, yeah? Well, your face is more fat than… not fat! 81 00:04:19,004 --> 00:04:20,297 Oh, snap. 82 00:04:20,464 --> 00:04:21,590 What do you say, folks? 83 00:04:21,674 --> 00:04:24,802 Are we just gonna let Bud win? How about a real election? 84 00:04:24,969 --> 00:04:26,554 Get in there, cap! 85 00:04:29,723 --> 00:04:32,184 Well, looks like we got some competition here, folks. 86 00:04:32,268 --> 00:04:34,228 Which I'm fine with, totally fine with. 87 00:04:35,312 --> 00:04:39,900 I was gonna let bygones be bygones, Stan, but you just made a powerful enemy. 88 00:04:40,067 --> 00:04:42,319 I'll win either way, and when I do, 89 00:04:42,403 --> 00:04:44,905 you might not like the Gravity Falls you wake up in. 90 00:04:47,908 --> 00:04:51,453 Election! Election! Election! 91 00:04:53,122 --> 00:04:54,915 Let the madness begin! 92 00:04:58,377 --> 00:05:01,463 - Grunkle Stan, what are you doing? - Running for mayor. 93 00:05:01,547 --> 00:05:03,465 Did I… Did I not make that clear? 94 00:05:03,632 --> 00:05:06,886 Grunkle Stan, it's not that we think you can't do it, it's just… 95 00:05:06,969 --> 00:05:08,178 No, no, it's okay, Mabel. 96 00:05:08,721 --> 00:05:10,014 We don't think you can do it. 97 00:05:10,180 --> 00:05:13,100 Look, kids, the mayor kicking the bucket got me thinking. 98 00:05:13,267 --> 00:05:15,352 I'm an old man and I'm not getting any younger. 99 00:05:15,436 --> 00:05:18,564 My dumb brother's research is probably gonna make him famous, 100 00:05:18,647 --> 00:05:20,482 and what do I have to show for my life? 101 00:05:20,566 --> 00:05:23,152 Do I really want "crooked grifter" on my tombstone? 102 00:05:23,235 --> 00:05:25,279 How about "crooked mayor"? 103 00:05:25,821 --> 00:05:27,406 Psst. Mabel, let's talk. 104 00:05:27,573 --> 00:05:29,575 I know Stan isn't the best candidate. 105 00:05:29,658 --> 00:05:32,036 Heck, he's committing voter fraud right now. 106 00:05:33,621 --> 00:05:37,124 But Bud's definitely up to something, and we're the only ones who can stop him. 107 00:05:37,291 --> 00:05:40,961 You're right, Dipper. Besides, Stan has a kind-of charisma. 108 00:05:41,086 --> 00:05:43,172 How hard could getting him elected be? 109 00:05:46,967 --> 00:05:48,802 Spread the word, pig. 110 00:05:50,054 --> 00:05:51,472 All right, everybody, eyes up here. 111 00:05:52,723 --> 00:05:55,559 Okay, Gravity Falls elections are based on two events: 112 00:05:55,726 --> 00:05:59,063 The Wednesday Stump Speech, held on an actual… stump, 113 00:05:59,146 --> 00:06:01,941 and the Friday Debate, wherein townsfolk throw bird seed 114 00:06:02,024 --> 00:06:03,609 at the candidate they like most. 115 00:06:03,692 --> 00:06:06,236 At the end, they release a Freedom Eagle, 116 00:06:06,320 --> 00:06:08,489 who will fly to the candidate covered in more seed 117 00:06:08,572 --> 00:06:12,534 and bestow a birdly kiss upon him, anointing him mayor. 118 00:06:14,036 --> 00:06:16,121 I couldn't make this up if I wanted to. 119 00:06:16,288 --> 00:06:18,248 Okay, Grunkle Stan, 120 00:06:18,332 --> 00:06:20,376 are you ready for your first radio interview? 121 00:06:20,501 --> 00:06:22,002 I got my mouth, don't I? 122 00:06:22,169 --> 00:06:24,046 Okay, you're on with the candidate. 123 00:06:25,005 --> 00:06:26,423 You're listening to Falls Radio, 124 00:06:26,507 --> 00:06:28,759 24-hour news and bear rampage alerts. 125 00:06:28,926 --> 00:06:31,595 And now, here's the T-Man! 126 00:06:31,762 --> 00:06:32,805 Hello! 127 00:06:32,888 --> 00:06:34,974 Candidate Stan, first question: 128 00:06:35,057 --> 00:06:37,893 How do you feel about the American flag? 129 00:06:38,060 --> 00:06:41,730 Eh. I can take it or leave it. Too many stripes. Next question? 130 00:06:41,814 --> 00:06:43,857 I don't know about that. 131 00:06:44,024 --> 00:06:46,944 What would you do to help educate our kids? 132 00:06:47,027 --> 00:06:50,364 Ha! Simple. Put them on an island and make them fight for dominance. 133 00:06:50,531 --> 00:06:53,867 Also teach kids swears. That'll bring them into the real world. 134 00:06:54,952 --> 00:06:58,122 What would you do about the crime in Gravity Falls? 135 00:06:58,205 --> 00:07:00,124 Wait. Do you mean crime in general, 136 00:07:00,207 --> 00:07:02,418 or just the specific crimes committed by m… 137 00:07:03,919 --> 00:07:06,630 Okay, interview's over. Candy, what's the damage? 138 00:07:06,797 --> 00:07:08,841 Your approval rating started at zero. 139 00:07:08,924 --> 00:07:10,718 Now it's a number lower than zero. 140 00:07:10,884 --> 00:07:13,178 You're meme-ing fast, and none of them are good. 141 00:07:14,179 --> 00:07:17,099 Look, Grunkle Stan, people are like smell markers, 142 00:07:17,182 --> 00:07:18,809 and you're black licorice. 143 00:07:18,892 --> 00:07:20,352 It's not that you're unsniffable, 144 00:07:20,436 --> 00:07:23,313 you just need to learn when to keep the cap on. 145 00:07:23,397 --> 00:07:26,442 From now on, maybe you should just read our prepared remarks. 146 00:07:27,484 --> 00:07:29,194 Sorry, kids. 147 00:07:29,278 --> 00:07:31,321 I only say words that come out of my brain. 148 00:07:31,405 --> 00:07:34,074 If my head says, "That lady's got an ugly baby," 149 00:07:34,158 --> 00:07:37,411 my mouth says, "Whoa, lady! You got one ugly baby!" 150 00:07:39,329 --> 00:07:41,582 And he's insisting on speaking his mind! 151 00:07:42,082 --> 00:07:43,751 So this is an emergency. 152 00:07:43,917 --> 00:07:45,517 The Stump Speech is in a couple of days, 153 00:07:45,586 --> 00:07:48,589 and if he continues like this, we'll lose to Bud for sure. 154 00:07:48,672 --> 00:07:50,924 Hmm. It's a shame there isn't some device 155 00:07:51,008 --> 00:07:53,177 that would allow you to control someone else. 156 00:07:53,260 --> 00:07:55,846 Oh, wait. Of course. Yes. There is. 157 00:07:56,013 --> 00:07:59,433 A long time ago, I designed a prototype for Ronald Reagan's masters. 158 00:07:59,516 --> 00:08:00,684 Just get Stan to wear this, 159 00:08:00,851 --> 00:08:03,520 and you can make him a literal talking head. 160 00:08:03,687 --> 00:08:06,231 Whoa! This is amazing! 161 00:08:06,315 --> 00:08:07,983 And ethically ambiguous! 162 00:08:08,150 --> 00:08:11,987 As long as you wear the matching one, he'll say and do whatever you want him to. 163 00:08:12,154 --> 00:08:13,363 Thank you, Great Uncle Ford! 164 00:08:13,447 --> 00:08:15,699 Yes, yes. Use it responsibly and all. 165 00:08:19,203 --> 00:08:21,080 Whoa, thanks for the slamming tie, dudes. 166 00:08:21,246 --> 00:08:23,290 These stripes are so slimming. 167 00:08:23,791 --> 00:08:26,877 You really think this mind control tie is gonna work? 168 00:08:27,044 --> 00:08:28,670 Flip the switch and test it out. 169 00:08:30,672 --> 00:08:31,673 Whoa! 170 00:08:31,757 --> 00:08:33,967 Oh, oh, oh, I'm a dancing dude 171 00:08:34,051 --> 00:08:37,096 I got some fancy moves and a bad attitude. 172 00:08:39,765 --> 00:08:41,683 Ha! That's amazing! 173 00:08:41,767 --> 00:08:44,228 Guys! Something weird just happened. 174 00:08:44,311 --> 00:08:45,771 I'm really freaked out! 175 00:08:45,854 --> 00:08:48,607 I am Soos-tron. Watch me eat this pinecone. 176 00:08:49,942 --> 00:08:51,944 Mind control is awesome! 177 00:08:52,111 --> 00:08:53,779 Oh, my gosh! 178 00:08:53,862 --> 00:08:56,532 My life just flashed before my eyes! Oh! 179 00:08:58,325 --> 00:09:00,244 Education? Get it! 180 00:09:00,327 --> 00:09:02,371 Prosperity? Get it! 181 00:09:02,454 --> 00:09:04,540 A Gravity Falls we can be proud of? 182 00:09:04,623 --> 00:09:06,208 Get it! 183 00:09:08,335 --> 00:09:12,047 Ugh! Do I really have to wear this thing? It looks like a flag threw up on me. 184 00:09:12,131 --> 00:09:14,675 Grunkle Stan, just trust your lucky tie. 185 00:09:14,758 --> 00:09:17,136 And now, Stanford Pines! 186 00:09:17,302 --> 00:09:18,720 You're on, Grunkle Stan! 187 00:09:19,888 --> 00:09:22,891 Okay, we'll only jump in if he starts doing badly. 188 00:09:23,058 --> 00:09:25,102 Hiya there! Stan Pines here. 189 00:09:25,185 --> 00:09:28,188 Let's get real. Do you think the women of Gravity Falls 190 00:09:28,272 --> 00:09:29,690 wear too much makeup? 191 00:09:29,857 --> 00:09:31,608 Jump in! Jump in! 192 00:09:31,775 --> 00:09:36,238 Uhh! Uh, what I meant to say was, you ladies all look great. 193 00:09:36,321 --> 00:09:38,407 And have you done something with your hair? 194 00:09:38,490 --> 00:09:40,492 Girl, you are working it! 195 00:09:40,659 --> 00:09:44,413 That is exactly what I needed to hear right now! 196 00:09:44,580 --> 00:09:46,498 - Whew! - I'm Stan Pines. 197 00:09:46,665 --> 00:09:49,459 You may know me as that guy who accidentally let all those bees loose 198 00:09:49,543 --> 00:09:51,587 in that elementary school a few years back. 199 00:09:53,755 --> 00:09:54,965 But I believe in things. 200 00:09:55,048 --> 00:09:56,633 America. Freedom. 201 00:09:56,717 --> 00:09:57,718 Ameri-freedom. 202 00:09:57,885 --> 00:10:00,554 Good. He's saying all the right things. 203 00:10:00,721 --> 00:10:03,849 Like my opponent pointed out, I may not have a pretty face, 204 00:10:03,932 --> 00:10:05,976 but if you want a candidate that will listen to you, 205 00:10:06,059 --> 00:10:09,396 well, I'm proud to be all ears. 206 00:10:11,565 --> 00:10:13,734 Now watch me break it down! 207 00:10:13,817 --> 00:10:16,486 Oh, yeah. 208 00:10:25,746 --> 00:10:28,165 Grunkle Stan, that was amazing! 209 00:10:28,248 --> 00:10:30,167 Yeah! How'd you do it, Mr. Pines? 210 00:10:30,334 --> 00:10:31,501 Uh, I don't know. 211 00:10:31,585 --> 00:10:33,670 I just opened my mouth and spoke from the heart. 212 00:10:33,754 --> 00:10:35,714 Or gut. Or something. 213 00:10:35,797 --> 00:10:37,132 What is that sound? 214 00:10:37,216 --> 00:10:39,468 Why are people jamming their hands together? 215 00:10:39,635 --> 00:10:40,886 It's applause! 216 00:10:40,969 --> 00:10:43,513 Grunkle Stan, they love you! 217 00:10:43,597 --> 00:10:46,266 They… love me? 218 00:10:46,433 --> 00:10:49,019 - Stan! Stan! Stan! - Stan! 219 00:10:50,437 --> 00:10:53,440 There he is! Mr. Pines, can we get a picture? 220 00:10:53,607 --> 00:10:55,359 Yes, we Stan! 221 00:11:06,995 --> 00:11:08,205 Gah! Darn it! 222 00:11:08,288 --> 00:11:10,791 Gosh heck huckleberry honeysuckle darn it! 223 00:11:10,874 --> 00:11:12,876 Excuse my language. I'm so sorry. 224 00:11:13,043 --> 00:11:15,587 Oh, this is bad. This is real bad. 225 00:11:15,671 --> 00:11:17,756 Uh, I need to speak with my campaign manager. 226 00:11:17,923 --> 00:11:19,675 Please excuse me for a moment. 227 00:11:21,885 --> 00:11:23,512 Look, I'm sorry about all this. 228 00:11:23,595 --> 00:11:27,182 This is a minor setback, but we'll win, I'm sure of it. 229 00:11:27,266 --> 00:11:29,601 Minor setback? 230 00:11:29,768 --> 00:11:31,478 Minor setback? 231 00:11:31,561 --> 00:11:33,647 You listen, Daddy, and you listen good. 232 00:11:33,730 --> 00:11:34,982 Prison is a nightmare! 233 00:11:35,148 --> 00:11:37,109 I eat the same slop every day! 234 00:11:37,276 --> 00:11:39,444 They have no hair products in here! 235 00:11:39,528 --> 00:11:43,198 I can't sleep because my cellmate took my pillow for a wife! 236 00:11:43,282 --> 00:11:45,450 You think I've been having fun in here? 237 00:11:45,534 --> 00:11:46,868 Hey, best friend! 238 00:11:46,952 --> 00:11:48,996 Don't be late for Friendship Bracelet class! 239 00:11:49,079 --> 00:11:51,999 I have finger-painting at the same time! 240 00:11:52,082 --> 00:11:55,085 Whew! The mayor dying is my one ticket out of here, 241 00:11:55,168 --> 00:11:57,045 which is why you're gonna win this election, 242 00:11:57,129 --> 00:11:58,338 pardon me out of prison, 243 00:11:58,422 --> 00:12:01,883 and we're not gonna let the Pines get in my way again! 244 00:12:02,050 --> 00:12:03,385 But… but you don't understand. 245 00:12:03,468 --> 00:12:06,555 He's doing great in the polls. It's almost like magic. 246 00:12:06,722 --> 00:12:09,099 Magic, you say. 247 00:12:09,182 --> 00:12:12,352 Well, maybe it's time we fight fire with fire. 248 00:12:12,436 --> 00:12:16,565 I've been saving this for a long time, waiting for the right moment. 249 00:12:16,732 --> 00:12:20,569 Boy, now, we've discussed this. No more spooky spells. 250 00:12:20,736 --> 00:12:26,074 Well, Daddy, maybe you just need to have more of an open mind. 251 00:12:30,662 --> 00:12:33,290 Oh, boy. Stop that! 252 00:12:33,373 --> 00:12:34,916 Anything but that! 253 00:12:39,421 --> 00:12:42,924 Oh, it's him. 254 00:12:46,011 --> 00:12:47,888 Lookin' good, mayor candidate. 255 00:12:47,971 --> 00:12:50,390 Hooey! It's the guy I'm gonna vote for! 256 00:12:50,474 --> 00:12:53,143 Lookin' A-OK, Stanford. A-OK! 257 00:12:53,226 --> 00:12:55,854 Tad, that means so much coming from you. 258 00:12:56,521 --> 00:12:57,522 Hey-O! 259 00:12:57,689 --> 00:12:59,441 Stan! 260 00:12:59,608 --> 00:13:00,817 Now just the ladies. 261 00:13:00,901 --> 00:13:02,069 Stan! 262 00:13:02,152 --> 00:13:04,029 Now just the ladies my age. 263 00:13:04,112 --> 00:13:05,155 Stan! 264 00:13:05,322 --> 00:13:06,323 Woof! Never mind. 265 00:13:08,367 --> 00:13:10,952 On the house, Mr. Big Shot. 266 00:13:11,036 --> 00:13:12,662 Now, this I could get used to. 267 00:13:12,829 --> 00:13:14,456 Grunkle Stan, what's with the outfit? 268 00:13:14,539 --> 00:13:17,084 - You're missing your lucky tie. - Power tie. Gotta wear it. 269 00:13:17,250 --> 00:13:18,668 Come on, have you seen the polls? 270 00:13:18,752 --> 00:13:21,046 I could debate naked and I'd still win. 271 00:13:21,129 --> 00:13:22,881 Huh. Come to think of it… 272 00:13:23,048 --> 00:13:24,674 Seriously, though, 273 00:13:24,758 --> 00:13:27,969 we need you to wear that suit and tie, Grunkle Stan. 274 00:13:28,053 --> 00:13:29,221 Suit and tie. Gotta wear it. 275 00:13:29,388 --> 00:13:32,349 Ugh! Why do you kids have to constantly tell me what to do? 276 00:13:32,432 --> 00:13:35,018 Everyone in this town is finally showing me respect! 277 00:13:35,102 --> 00:13:36,645 Maybe you kids should, too. 278 00:13:36,812 --> 00:13:39,815 Grunkle Stan, we'd respect you if you took things more seriously! 279 00:13:39,981 --> 00:13:41,441 I am taking this seriously! 280 00:13:41,525 --> 00:13:42,692 If you haven't noticed, 281 00:13:42,776 --> 00:13:45,046 everything's that's come out of this golden mouth has put us on top, 282 00:13:45,070 --> 00:13:46,655 with or without your dumb advice! 283 00:13:46,822 --> 00:13:48,073 Dumb advice? 284 00:13:48,240 --> 00:13:50,951 - Yeah! Dumb advice. - Dang it, Stan! 285 00:13:51,034 --> 00:13:53,703 Every one of those speeches, we were controlling you! 286 00:13:53,870 --> 00:13:55,455 - Dipper! - What? 287 00:13:55,622 --> 00:13:58,333 This tie is a mind control device invented by Ford. 288 00:13:58,417 --> 00:14:01,086 If it wasn't for this tie, you'd be losing! 289 00:14:03,171 --> 00:14:05,132 Well, you can tell that know-it-all Ford 290 00:14:05,215 --> 00:14:07,759 that he can keep his fancy light bulbs and magic ties. 291 00:14:07,843 --> 00:14:10,470 I'm gonna win this debate on my own, without any of you! 292 00:14:10,637 --> 00:14:12,305 Stan, wait! You can't! 293 00:14:14,391 --> 00:14:15,559 Oh, this is bad. 294 00:14:15,642 --> 00:14:18,353 If we want to beat Bud, we need another candidate, fast! 295 00:14:18,437 --> 00:14:22,023 What we need is a blank slate, someone totally suggestible! 296 00:14:22,107 --> 00:14:25,026 An empty piece of clay we can mold to our whims. 297 00:14:25,110 --> 00:14:26,486 Hey, a little help, dudes? 298 00:14:26,570 --> 00:14:28,989 I accidentally got my head stuck in my shirt sleeve. 299 00:14:29,072 --> 00:14:30,449 I guess this is my life now. 300 00:14:33,577 --> 00:14:34,619 Seed here! 301 00:14:34,703 --> 00:14:38,165 Support your favorite candidate by throwing election seed! 302 00:14:38,331 --> 00:14:42,252 Welcome, all, to the final debate in what's sure to be, on a cosmic scale, 303 00:14:42,335 --> 00:14:44,421 a forgettable blip in human history. 304 00:14:44,588 --> 00:14:47,674 And here come the three more popular candidates! 305 00:14:47,841 --> 00:14:50,218 Oh! Hello there, Stanford. 306 00:14:50,302 --> 00:14:53,930 Long time no see. Tee-hee! Woo-hoo-hoo! 307 00:14:54,014 --> 00:14:57,017 Don't you "tee-hee" me. I'll debate you into the ground! 308 00:14:57,184 --> 00:15:01,104 Oh, but I have a widdle twist up my sweevy-weeves. 309 00:15:01,271 --> 00:15:03,982 You're making me very uncomfortable right now. 310 00:15:04,149 --> 00:15:05,650 But what's this? 311 00:15:05,817 --> 00:15:08,403 One new candidate has entered the race! 312 00:15:08,570 --> 00:15:10,155 Wait a minute. What? 313 00:15:12,949 --> 00:15:14,618 Those backstabbing… 314 00:15:14,784 --> 00:15:16,244 Let the debate begin! 315 00:15:17,370 --> 00:15:18,497 First question: 316 00:15:18,580 --> 00:15:20,999 What's your position on axes? 317 00:15:21,082 --> 00:15:23,502 Wait. I mean… taxes. 318 00:15:23,668 --> 00:15:25,378 Easy. Taxes are the worst. 319 00:15:25,545 --> 00:15:29,966 I propose we stimulate the economy by waging wars on neighboring cities. 320 00:15:30,133 --> 00:15:32,052 We have the cannons. 321 00:15:32,219 --> 00:15:34,304 Boo! 322 00:15:34,471 --> 00:15:35,472 What? Uh… 323 00:15:36,014 --> 00:15:37,474 I don't know much about taxes, 324 00:15:37,557 --> 00:15:40,477 but I can promise you, a kitten in every pot. 325 00:15:40,560 --> 00:15:42,020 That doesn't make sense, Mabel. 326 00:15:42,103 --> 00:15:43,438 You don't make sense, Dipper! 327 00:15:45,106 --> 00:15:48,527 Fwends. Fwends. Can't you see what's happening on this stage? 328 00:15:48,610 --> 00:15:51,446 These politicians are dancing around the issues. 329 00:15:51,613 --> 00:15:55,242 Well, I can sing round the issues! 330 00:15:56,076 --> 00:15:58,912 Oh, crime is bad crime is, oh, so bad. 331 00:15:58,995 --> 00:16:01,081 Vote for Bud and there ain't gonna be no crime. 332 00:16:01,164 --> 00:16:02,832 Crime's bad! Vote for Bud! 333 00:16:04,584 --> 00:16:06,503 You may now throw your birdseed. 334 00:16:09,214 --> 00:16:11,424 And now, a quick intermission. 335 00:16:11,591 --> 00:16:13,093 We're getting eaten alive back there. 336 00:16:13,260 --> 00:16:16,346 Since when has Bud been creepily adorable? 337 00:16:16,429 --> 00:16:19,015 I don't know! It doesn't make sense! 338 00:16:19,099 --> 00:16:21,851 He's almost acting just like… like… 339 00:16:21,935 --> 00:16:24,688 Wittle ol' me. 340 00:16:25,939 --> 00:16:29,067 Aha! Hello there! Long time no see. 341 00:16:29,150 --> 00:16:32,612 Except in my revenge fantasies where I see you on an hourly basis. 342 00:16:32,779 --> 00:16:35,323 Gideon! I knew you were somehow behind this! 343 00:16:35,407 --> 00:16:36,783 You've been controlling Bud! 344 00:16:36,950 --> 00:16:39,286 And it seems you've been controlling Stanford! 345 00:16:39,369 --> 00:16:40,829 I have to hand it to both y'all. 346 00:16:40,912 --> 00:16:43,623 You've gotten much eviler since I last saw you. 347 00:16:43,790 --> 00:16:44,791 Daddy. 348 00:16:47,961 --> 00:16:49,796 Let go of us! 349 00:16:55,844 --> 00:16:59,097 Behold your grand view of the debate! 350 00:16:59,264 --> 00:17:03,435 Once I win this election, I'll finally rule this backwoods town! 351 00:17:03,602 --> 00:17:06,479 You'll never get away with this, you creepy little dork! 352 00:17:06,646 --> 00:17:10,275 Oh, I'd be happy to spare you, Mabel, if you agree to be mine. 353 00:17:10,442 --> 00:17:13,111 I even made you this wedding dress in crafts class. 354 00:17:13,194 --> 00:17:14,904 Don't ask what it's made of. 355 00:17:15,071 --> 00:17:17,282 Ew! I'd rather die, you creep! 356 00:17:17,449 --> 00:17:19,576 Fine! Have it your way. 357 00:17:19,659 --> 00:17:22,621 Once I win, they'll hit the plunger for the fireworks display, 358 00:17:22,787 --> 00:17:26,041 finishing the mountain's construction, trapping you all inside. 359 00:17:26,124 --> 00:17:29,419 I've been trapped behind concrete all summer, now see how you like it! 360 00:17:30,712 --> 00:17:33,632 Say hello to the next mayor of Gravity Falls, kids! 361 00:17:36,718 --> 00:17:40,805 And that is why, um, the Statue of Liberty is our hottest landmark. 362 00:17:40,972 --> 00:17:42,307 Boo! 363 00:17:42,474 --> 00:17:44,517 All right, I lied. She's kind of mannish. 364 00:17:44,601 --> 00:17:45,769 What do you want from me? 365 00:17:50,106 --> 00:17:52,484 You're dying out there, Stan. 366 00:17:53,735 --> 00:17:55,737 Kids, you were right all along. 367 00:17:55,904 --> 00:17:57,944 I should have listened to you when I had the chance. 368 00:17:57,989 --> 00:18:00,241 - Help! Help us! - What the… 369 00:18:00,325 --> 00:18:02,285 We're tied to a bunch of fireworks! 370 00:18:10,460 --> 00:18:11,461 Kids! 371 00:18:12,879 --> 00:18:13,880 Aah! 372 00:18:14,047 --> 00:18:16,883 Listen, everybody, this debate is over. 373 00:18:17,050 --> 00:18:18,635 I gotta go save my family! 374 00:18:18,802 --> 00:18:21,388 No, those… those are just some demolition dummies. 375 00:18:21,471 --> 00:18:22,472 Nothing to see here. 376 00:18:22,639 --> 00:18:23,848 Can it, Gleeful! 377 00:18:25,225 --> 00:18:26,226 Ha! 378 00:18:26,393 --> 00:18:28,311 In a shocking turn of events, 379 00:18:28,395 --> 00:18:30,814 Stan Pines has run to the aid of two children 380 00:18:30,897 --> 00:18:32,607 who appear to be in danger. 381 00:18:33,358 --> 00:18:35,527 And the crowd is loving it! 382 00:18:35,694 --> 00:18:37,946 No! Stop it! Thank you, but stop it! 383 00:18:38,029 --> 00:18:40,240 Get back, you terror birds! 384 00:18:51,459 --> 00:18:52,752 Grunkle Stan! 385 00:18:53,420 --> 00:18:56,339 Kids! Look, I'm sorry I was being stubborn. 386 00:18:56,506 --> 00:18:58,508 I guess being the town's hero wasn't enough. 387 00:18:58,591 --> 00:18:59,968 I wanted to be yours, too. 388 00:19:00,135 --> 00:19:04,013 We're sorry, Grunkle Stan. We should have supported you, win or lose. 389 00:19:04,097 --> 00:19:05,265 Probably lose. 390 00:19:05,432 --> 00:19:07,100 I can still drop you, you know. 391 00:19:14,190 --> 00:19:16,776 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, not again! 392 00:19:18,027 --> 00:19:20,697 Time to take care of you, once and for all! 393 00:19:20,780 --> 00:19:22,574 Oh, no! We have to get out of here! 394 00:19:22,657 --> 00:19:27,287 Kids, if I die, make sure I get a bigger tombstone than Ford. 395 00:19:41,634 --> 00:19:43,136 No! No! 396 00:20:05,575 --> 00:20:10,705 Mayor Pines! Mayor Pines! Mayor Pines! 397 00:20:10,789 --> 00:20:13,208 Well, I guess we know who won. 398 00:20:13,374 --> 00:20:16,503 This just in, Stanford Pines loses. 399 00:20:17,086 --> 00:20:18,086 What? 400 00:20:18,129 --> 00:20:20,882 Despite winning an overwhelming 95% of the vote, 401 00:20:20,965 --> 00:20:23,092 election officials had to disqualify him 402 00:20:23,176 --> 00:20:25,470 due to discovery of an extensive criminal record. 403 00:20:25,637 --> 00:20:26,638 Oh, boy. 404 00:20:26,721 --> 00:20:28,389 Stan, what did you do? 405 00:20:28,473 --> 00:20:29,808 What didn't I do? 406 00:20:29,974 --> 00:20:32,602 Crimes include shoplifting, teaching bears to drive, 407 00:20:32,685 --> 00:20:35,980 a new crime he invented called "burgle-bezzlement," 408 00:20:36,064 --> 00:20:38,066 first-degree llamacide… 409 00:20:38,233 --> 00:20:39,901 That llama knew too much. 410 00:20:40,068 --> 00:20:41,569 Due to this shocking development, 411 00:20:41,653 --> 00:20:43,321 it would appear the mayorship passes 412 00:20:43,404 --> 00:20:46,366 to the only candidate who actually filled out their paperwork, 413 00:20:46,449 --> 00:20:49,786 local enthusiasm enthusiast, Tyler Cutebiker. 414 00:20:53,581 --> 00:20:54,791 Got it. 415 00:20:54,958 --> 00:20:56,793 We will dedicate the rest of this broadcast 416 00:20:56,876 --> 00:20:58,711 to listing Stan's crimes. 417 00:20:58,795 --> 00:21:01,673 First-degree thermometer theft, pug trafficking… 418 00:21:02,382 --> 00:21:04,509 Whew! At least they didn't list any of the bad ones. 419 00:21:04,592 --> 00:21:07,011 On an unrelated topic, I have a lot of cheap pugs, 420 00:21:07,095 --> 00:21:08,638 and I need to move them fast. 421 00:21:08,805 --> 00:21:10,306 Aw, I'm sorry, Stan. 422 00:21:10,390 --> 00:21:12,642 I actually think you as mayor would have been fun. 423 00:21:12,809 --> 00:21:14,102 Ah, maybe it's for the best. 424 00:21:14,185 --> 00:21:15,979 I got close to the dream, though, kids. 425 00:21:16,145 --> 00:21:17,689 Hey, I knit you something. 426 00:21:17,772 --> 00:21:20,567 It's not official, but I think it fits. 427 00:21:23,987 --> 00:21:25,655 Grunkle Stan, are you crying? 428 00:21:25,738 --> 00:21:27,740 I got campaign confetti in my eye. 429 00:21:27,824 --> 00:21:30,743 Come on, kids, want to go vandalize Mayor Tyler's mansion? 430 00:21:30,827 --> 00:21:33,746 - He-hey, vandalism! - Yay! 431 00:21:34,873 --> 00:21:37,542 I'm sorry the election thing didn't work out for you, bro. 432 00:21:37,625 --> 00:21:40,795 But if it makes you feel any better, we're gonna throw a riot tonight. 433 00:21:40,879 --> 00:21:43,381 Does someone want to throw a riot? 434 00:21:43,464 --> 00:21:46,175 Thanks, Ghost Eyes, I'm just not in the mood. 435 00:21:48,011 --> 00:21:51,264 This poster is the only thing keeping me going. 436 00:21:56,895 --> 00:21:59,230 I'm finally ready to make a deal.