Do you feel the Spirit?
And in the 39th year of his reign, Asa was diseased in his feet
until the disease was exceedingly great,
yet he didn't seek help from the Lord, but from the physicians.
Now, there is nothing wrong with seeing a doctor.
But can a doctor heal through the power that Jesus gave his disciples?
Men of science can walk through life with blindfolds,
never knowing that you or I could not take a single step
if we were not uplifted by God.
Agnes, thank you for letting me be an instrument of God's love for you.
In faith...
all things are possible.
My friends, I want you to let Agnes
feel the wave of faith in this church here today,
lifting her into God's hands.
Praise God!
You can do it. Come on, sister.
Praise Jesus!
Thanks be to God!
Thank you, Lord! Thanks be to God!
Thank you, Lord!
- Is he all right? - No!
My son!
Daddy, I think I need a doctor.
Didn't remember my DVD player?
Well, if you wanted it,
you shouldn't have left it behind when you moved out.
I get it. It's a drag watching porn on VHS.
I'll call you as soon as I'm done with it.
That's if you ever get a phone installed.
Oh, forget it. I'll come by and get it myself. After work, Thursday?
Won't be home Thursday.
No problem. I still have a key, I can let myself in and out.
I guess maybe I could bring it in tomorrow.
After all, how many times can you hit "pause"
at the part where Lindsay Lohan wins the spelling bee?
What is it about girls who can spell?
- It's a math contest. - What is it about girls who can count?
It's poker night, isn't it?
You said weeks ago that I could play.
- Stop making excuses. - Gotta go!
Building full of sick people. If I hurry, maybe I can avoid them.
The abdominal series showed no evidence of obstruction.
- What did you have to eat? - Chicken sandwich.
We travel, lots of fast food.
Thank you, I barely felt it.
You're welcome.
God told me you were kind.
You talk to God?
God's presence often descends on Boyd to help him guide others.
- This been going on long? - Since he was 10.
God told me I would meet a woman healer
who was harboring vengeful thoughts about a man she works with.
That's God's job.
I'll keep that in mind.
- His urine is dilute. - What does that mean?
Could mean that for some reason his kidneys aren't purifying
the way they should, which would let toxins accumulate in his body.
We'll run the blood work and see what it tells us.
Thank you, I appreciate it.
God talks to him?
It's not psychosis. He's just religious.
The only medical issue that showed up on the blood work is low sodium.
No. You talk to God, you're religious. God talks to you, you're psychotic.
A lot of people experience their religion
as something more than symbolic.
That doesn't mean...
God ever talk to you when you were in the seminary?
- No. - God's loss, our gain.
He's either psychotic or a scam artist.
He was actually really impressive.
Well, yeah, with the burning bush and all, it's quite the show.
He was intelligent, polite, dignified. He's not a typical 15-year-old.
And he told Cameron God wants her
to stop being pissed at me over the article.
God knows you stole Cameron's article?
He knows she's harboring vengeful thoughts.
I'm over it.
I could tell that from the Berlin Wall of body language between you.
I'm shocked that he picked up on it. Low sodium. Check for Addison's?
No pigmentation and potassium levels were normal.
Cirrhosis?
Liver feels fine, transaminases are normal.
We should monitor his saline intake to correct the low sodium.
No more than 1 meq per liter, per hour.
Let's push the patient history,
see if there's any evidence of drugs or other delusions.
I'll take care of it.
You're gonna talk to a patient?
God talks to him.
It'd be arrogant of me to assume that I'm better than God.
So, you're a faith healer? Or is that a pejorative?
Do you prefer something like "divine health management"?
Thought God might have mentioned that I was coming.
I'm OK with faith healer, Dr House.
That's a nice one. You didn't even go with,
"I see an H in a medical coat."
- The nurses talk about you a lot. - Yeah, don't believe them.
I keep a sock in my pants.
Faith. That's another word for ignorance, isn't it?
I never understood how people could be so proud of believing in something
with no proof at all. Like that's an achievement.
God's asking for our trust. You can't love somebody and not trust them.
Trust has to be earned.
You can't trust someone hiding in a closet.
You don't trust anyone.
You seem lucid. There's no confusion, no lethargy.
What drugs have you been taking?
Nothing, some aspirin.
I get focused on something, I forget to eat,
next thing you know, I've got a hunger headache.
So, aspirin and hospitals are OK.
That's an interesting attitude for someone who's kept any number of people
from getting medical help.
Just because I believe in prayer
doesn't mean I don't believe in germs and toxins.
That bottle's been opened before. You refilled it at the water cooler.
- Yes. - How often do you do that?
Few times an hour. He likes to stay hydrated.
- You think germs might have gotten in? - I think water might have gotten in.
- We can adjust your pain meds. - Again.
Suppose we increase your oxycodone?
We both know the only reason I'm talking lucidly now
is because I did not take my full dose this morning.
You've done your best
and I have been a good soldier.
It's time we accept it's over.
What about the trip you were talking about taking?
You've wanted to see Florence since you were a teenager, right?
Yeah, go now all drugged up?
It's not exactly the trip I'd been dreaming of.
OK, but you're strong, you're dealing with this
and there is the right combination of pain meds out there. And we'll find it.
Don't give up on us.
And don't be startled by the sound you're about to hear.
Excuse me.
I have a friend with... boundary issues.
- Can this wait five minutes? - Is she dying?
Yeah.
Before the end of this consult?
They could build monuments to your self-centeredness.
Patient, 15-year-old, faith healer, hotline to God.
- What are his symptoms? - He is not a saint.
He figures out what's going on in people's lives
by watching, listening, deducing.
And you're worried about trademark infringement?
Then he passes on advice from God so he can watch them jump.
It's a power trip.
Oh, and there the similarities end. Why is he here?
I fear for the human race.
A teenager claims to be the voice of God
and people with advanced degrees are listening.
The majority of Americans believe in a personal god.
- What are his symptoms? - Massive cramps, low sodium.
Turns out he's been drinking water non-stop,
God told him to purify his body.
Huge water intake would cause low sodium.
Which would cause the cramping. Yeah, I got it.
What, that's it? You solved it?
You just brought me out here to rant because faith annoys you?
Mmm-hmm. He's all better.
You know, I'd get it if people were just looking for a way to fill the holes.
But they want the holes, they wanna live in the holes
and they go nuts when someone else pours dirt in their holes.
Climb out of your holes, people!
Go tell it on the mountain.
Over the hills and everywhere.
Go tell it on the mountain.
That Jesus Christ is born.
Go tell it on the mountain.
Over the hills and everywhere.
Go tell it on the mountain.
That Jesus Christ is born
Boyd, are you all right?
Boyd.
Come on, let's go. Can you tell me your name?
Do you know where you are? Boyd?
Boyd?
God doesn't want you to be afraid.
He sent me here to heal you.
You think he hasn't heard your prayers, but he heard them all,
even the ones you didn't say.
I'm sorry, Boyd, come on, let's get you back to your room.
- In faith, all things are possible. - Let's go.
Lord, I call on you to relieve the suffering of your daughter...
Grace? and make her whole again.
Hey, hey! What are you doing? What is this?
He's just had a complex partial seizure. He's disoriented.
- He doesn't know what he's doing. - Well, get him back to his room. Now.
You OK?
Are we certain he even had a seizure?
Him singing and healing, he does it all the time, doesn't he?
Isn't it interesting
that religious behavior is so close to being crazy,
we can't tell them apart.
The repetition, the lack of affect and awareness. It was a seizure.
- Infection? - No fever.
Could be Wilson's or maybe it's a glycogen storage disease.
- Or a brain tumor. - Or tuberous sclerosis.
Hmm.
How to settle this?
We could ask our patient to ask God or we could MRI his brain.
Which way do you wanna go? I'm open to all.
- House! - Yes.
Why the hell do you let an unstable patient wander the hallways?
His leash broke.
The last thing a terminal patient needs
is to hear somebody taunt them with a cure.
She was freaked, she was angry.
And now she's not freaked and angry and you are.
She says she's feeling better.
Maybe not singing and dancing, but she's feeling a little bit happy
for the first time in months.
A sudden drop in pain could create euphoria.
Why don't you let her have her vacation?
Oh, that's great. And when vacation's over?
When she crash-lands from all this denial?
She was dealing with her illness.
Now her expectations are rising.
And you're not the one who has to be there when all that false hope
gets yanked out from under her.
Don't you guys have anything to do?
How long have you been healing people?
You believe that's what I'm doing?
I'd like to.
But you don't.
Why do you always do things you don't want to do?
It's OK, I don't expect a real answer.
God would probably want you to take the stick out of your butt
and get over this.
If there is some higher order running the universe,
it's probably so different from anything our species can conceive,
there's no point in even thinking about it.
But I doubt it gives a damn about my butt.
So you believe God might exist, but you don't think about it?
It's the most important issue...
I think penguins might as well speculate about nuclear physics.
- Why are we having this conversation? - What? I'm curious.
You cannot tell someone they are your colleague and not a friend,
and then casually chat about the afterlife.
You actually keep score?
Your MRI results aren't done yet.
Go back to your room. No singing.
Well, you would get a point for figuring why the low sodium.
What are my guy's points for?
Your trick about the spat between Dr Cameron and Dr Foreman
apparently impressed someone.
And the second point?
Do you think it could be because I healed Grace?
She's been back to see me, I like her.
You like messing with people. That's why you're here now.
Maybe you think that your batteries are powered by God, maybe you don't.
Either way, you enjoy what you do.
Yes, I like helping people.
I get a rush when I see the look on their faces when they realize
their burdens are gone.
But you make sure you're in the next state
by the time the endorphins wear off and the arthritis comes back.
That doesn't happen.
Oh, you do extensive follow-up studies?
God told me.
You see, that's not fair. We were having fun.
It's hard to keep sniping rationally
when you throw a bomb like that in there.
He spoke with me about you, too.
Forgive my enemies?
Never date a Taurus when Mercury is in retrograde?
Yeah, I learned that one myself, the hard way.
God says you look for excuses to be alone.
See, that is exactly the kind of brilliance that sounds deep,
but you could say it about any person who doesn't pine for the social approval
of everyone he meets, which you were cleverly able to deduce about me
by not being a moron.
Next time, tell God to be more specific.
God wants you to invite Dr Wilson to your poker game.
Don't talk to my patient.
What are you talking about?
You get all huffy when my patient stumbles into yours in the hallway,
but you got no qualms about chatting my guy up.
This is fun, it's like Password. Keep talking.
I'll jump in when I get a clue what the hell you're talking about.
God knows about my poker game.
You think I told him?
Either that or I start going to church every Sunday.
That would mess with my bowling league.
Aside from yelling at him to get back to his room,
I've never spoken to your patient.
MRI shows an abnormal area.
Tuberous sclerosis.
- It's the right neighborhood. - Accounts for all the symptoms.
- All of them. - Leading cortical tuber's identifiable.
- We can do this surgically. - Tell our patient, "Congratulations."
Soon his chats with God will be a thing of the past.
Tie goes to the mortal.
Did you know the Catholic Church keeps a doctor at Lourdes?
He hears the same thing every day.
But, out of the thousands of cases of people who have claimed to feel better,
the Catholic Church has only recognized a handful as miracles.
But they do recognize a handful.
Well, they're a church. It's what they do.
Look. For the past couple of years,
the world's been getting smaller.
Eight months, six months...
I watch a trailer for a movie and I think,
"Am I gonna be here when that comes out?"
But maybe there is still a horizon out there.
You know, maybe... Maybe I can make plans for a year from now.
Two years.
I like the view.
The view is a lie, and if you believe it,
you're going to crash so hard.
Let me take new images of your liver.
You can't accept that it could be true.
Well, if it is true, you shouldn't be afraid of proving it.
Tuberous sclerosis is a genetic disorder.
It causes small, benign tumors to grow in various parts of the body.
- In this case, the brain. - You said benign.
They probably are, but benign or not, they're not in a good location.
- We need to remove them. - You're talking brain surgery?
His symptoms are getting worse, which means the tumors are growing.
Surgery will correct it all, the chemical imbalance, the seizures,
the auditory hallucinations.
Hallucinations?
Without the surgery, it's just gonna get worse.
Might even be fatal.
With the surgery, your son should be a perfectly normal 15-year-old boy.
I'm not normal.
I need you to talk to my patient. I'll get this one.
Why do I have the feeling you're plotting world domination?
Moses is refusing surgery. You have a gift.
People thank you for telling them they're going to die.
If I can get him to agree to surgery, I want in on the poker game.
You would let this kid die just to get into a stupid game?
You'd let him die just to keep me out?
Hi.
I'm Dr Wilson.
I knew they'd send somebody else.
- That God has a big mouth. - House.
Can I ask why you don't want the tumors removed?
God put them there for a reason.
You think God needs a telephone in your head to talk to you?
Isn't he everywhere? It's not a long-distance call, is it?
This is the way God does things, through natural law.
If he went around doing big flashy miracles all the time,
- nobody would need faith. - How come everyone else needs faith,
but you just get the guy screaming his existence in your ear?
Your turn.
Do you think God wants you to die?
This is the way that the Lord often is with his chosen ones.
He gives the most trials to those that he loves the most.
How sweet.
You abdicate your authority, avoid those tricky parental issues,
like whether to let him drive at 16. Just let him die at 15.
So, you believe your son is...
erm, a saint?
The way I understand it, one of the hallmarks of a saint is humility.
Now, someone with true humility would consider the possibility
that God hadn't chosen him for that kind of honor.
Well, he'd consider the possibility
that he just had an illness.
You have a gift for manipulation.
I listen, I have an actual conversation with people,
which, shockingly, does raise the odds they'll be cooperative.
That's what I'm saying.
You read that kid and you manipulated the hell out of him.
Bring pretzels.
I know that knock.
Use your key, I'm not getting up.
Game's not till tomorrow night and those aren't pretzels.
I took some images of Grace Palmieri's cancer.
Yeah?
Her tumor's shrunk.
Don't tell my patient.
I want all the records on miracle woman.
Every test, every treatment she's ever had,
every question she's ever answered in this hospital.
And anything sent from previous doctors. Go back to neonatal if you have to.
Which part of "keep them away from each other" confused you?
They're friends. She thinks he saved her life.
Now we have obligingly offered medical proof
that his delusions are true.
They've withdrawn permission for the surgery.
I put the lawyers on it. Her tumor shrank?
I'm on it.
Tell Jesus that we need another 24 hours to normalize his sodium level.
He's already normalized.
Actually, tell Joseph. Jesus will know you're lying.
And I want you and Foreman and Cameron
to go over every line of every file on that woman.
Isn't he the one we're supposed to save?
The only way to save him is to prove that she is still dying.
MRI machine checks out.
Maybe the radiologist mis-charted which machine they used.
I checked both.
This is insane, we're diagnosing a recovery.
What about six months ago?
Maybe there was a malfunction in her "before" pictures,
some shadow that made the tumor look bigger than it really was.
I'll go see what I can find out.
Maybe it's a delayed effect from radiation.
Sometimes it could take a while.
She hasn't had radiation for six months.
- Here. - Nowhere. Her records...
There's about a dozen appliances in every home that give off radiation.
Dosages that wouldn't hurt a hamster if it was tied to the machine for a year.
If the machine's operating properly.
Sometimes remissions just happen.
You think House will just shrug and say that
if one of us doesn't check the home?
- Kings on nines. - Out.
Thank you.
Wilson. This is a dry cleaner, tax accountant, guy from the bus stop.
This is Wilson.
How come he gets a name?
Seniority. Hello.
Find anything?
Do you have any idea how many electrical devices give off radiation?
- All of them. - I'm going to be here all night.
Everybody's a whiner.
Be a doer, not a me-tooer.
Raise.
I'm out.
She's got at least four different types of pain pills here
and an LED device.
I'll raise your raise.
Keep looking.
Fold.
You were bluffing, he knew you were bluffing.
Your luck's changing tonight.
So, did they find anything?
Or are you gonna have to accept the fact
that every now and then remissions happen?
This call had better be worth my time.
This is what happens when it's not our patient. We don't know enough.
- That's why you're there. - She's got a boyfriend...
Unless you think he's radioactive... who could show up any minute.
The honor of working for you is not worth a felony charge.
Give me a minute.
I'm saying the odds of you having a straight flush are pretty low.
House?
I'll fold.
- Fold. - Fold.
I'm screwed, aren't I?
Nine bucks for a straight flush.
He's not coming home. Relax.
There's nothing in this universe that can't be explained, eventually.
Take this game.
Only two people knew that you wanted in on it.
I didn't tell him...
- I told you, I didn't tell him. - Why would you?
No, the only person he's been getting all intimate and conversational with
is your cancer chick.
How would she know?
The subject of my poker game
isn't likely to come up in the course of a patient interview.
Well, that's the kind of thing that you mention
to someone you're used to sharing the details of your day with.
Don't.
Your rabbi. Guidance counselor, parent.
She's not your mom, is she?
I'm seriously saying don't.
- You've been having sex... - This is so not the place.
With our miracle woman.
Excuse me. May I talk to you?
Of course.
Boyd's getting dressed, he's ready to check out.
He can't check out without your permission.
- His sodium level still isn't normal. - I told him.
He said that God said it was OK, he was fine.
Could you talk to him?
Tell them my name isn't Wilson.
Most people in your situation just have their careers to worry about.
You've got that and divine retribution.
Tell them.
Tell me how it happened, and I'll tell them whatever you want.
She'd had a bad day, pain-wise.
Her ride didn't show up to take her home.
- So, you offered? - Yeah.
She didn't have any groceries, she was too sick to go out,
I figured I could afford to take a half hour
and pick her up a few things...
- Stay and make sure she's OK. - Yeah.
And never leave.
You told me you got an apartment.
But you moved in with her. You lied to me.
Tell them.
His name is not Wilson and he's screwed up worse than I am.
OK. Yes, I lied to you.
I'm sorry.
Half the doctors who specialize in oncology turn into burned-out cases.
But you, you eat neediness.
Lucky for you.
Thanks for the game, guys. I don't think I'll be coming back.
You're a functional vampire.
Sure, you're heroic, useful to society,
but only because it feeds you.
There's nothing worth stealing, so don't even look.
You don't just have a fetish for needy people, you marry them!
- Here we go. - You mean it!
And then time passes, and suddenly they're not so needy any more.
Your fault. You've been there for them too much.
They're getting healthy, independent and that's just ugly.
God, you must be pissed at God right now, making her all happy.
- Why are you doing this? - Because you're being stupid.
You know what you're risking by sleeping with a patient.
Oh, that's crap.
You're not mad because I'm risking my job.
You're not even mad cos I lied to you.
You're mad because I lied to you and you couldn't tell.
- Yeah. You got me nailed. - Yeah.
That's why you didn't want me in your poker game.
Because when it comes to being in control,
Gregory House leaves our faith-healer kid in the dust
and that's why religious belief annoys you.
Because if the universe operates by abstract rules,
you can learn them and you can protect yourself.
If a supreme being exists, he can squash you any time he wants.
He knows where I am.
I think it's yours.
Yeah.
I'll be right there.
Jesus is spiking a fever. He's delusional.
Tuberous sclerosis doesn't cause fever.
I know.
I'll drive.
Pick any random guy off the street, bring him in here,
examine him exhaustively, you will find at least three things wrong with him.
This kid has tuberous sclerosis, a mild case.
But his tumors are growing.
We assumed that the tumors were growing, cos he's getting sicker.
But he could have grown old and died and never known about them
if he hadn't come here.
We were looking for something, it's more or less in the right part of the brain.
It's like we found someone standing over a dead body holding a gun,
we arrested them, didn't look any further.
Sometimes people really do just stumble into a murder scene.
His fever's 103 and rising.
If we don't do anything, he's gonna be chatting with God
face-to-face real soon.
Fevers don't come from a long-term underlying condition.
He's a garden-variety religious nut who happens to have an infection.
It's lumbar puncture time.
No, no, God told me, no more of man's medicine.
If we have faith in him, he'll make me well.
It's just a test. We just want to find out what's wrong.
God knows what's wrong, God will take care of it.
He's delirious and he's a minor. This is your decision and not his.
"The Kingdom of Heaven is like a treasure hidden in a field,"
which when a man finds, he hides, and for joy he goes and sells
"all he owns and buys that field."
Buy all the land you want, don't blow your brains out.
You're watching your son kill himself. He's out of his mind with fever...
Dad! If your faith is weak, I will fail.
I need you.
I'm sorry, you don't even know what's wrong with him.
God knows the answer
and I would rather leave it in his hands than yours.
Wilson.
I need you to do your thing.
You do know that I don't actually have magical powers.
I have faith.
You're better off trying to slip some antibiotics into a meal.
Which antibiotics? We don't know what infection he's got.
- Go as broad as you can. - Forget it.
Our best hope is your silver tongue.
What if it's not an infection?
Were you not paying attention when I was doing my murder scene metaphor?
What if the tuberous sclerosis is guilty.
It had the gun in its hands, it was standing over the...
Doesn't cause fever.
It causes everything else. What if the fever's the innocent bystander?
The fever could have been set off by something he picked up anywhere.
It could have been a bug he got here.
Or a bug he gave here.
He gave it to your patient.
That's why her tumor shrank, the virus went after the cancer first.
Are you saying a virus attacked her tumor?
For 200 years, there've been reports of wild viruses that target tumors.
Early 1900s, an Italian medical journal wrote up a woman with cervical cancer
who was injected with a weak strain of rabies.
I have no idea why they did that, but her tumor shrank.
You think he gave her rabies?
One of the virus types most prone to go after cancer cells is herpes.
Herpes encephalitis.
It would fit.
Seizure, low sodium, even the blurred vision.
And it would mean, if you're right, Grace's cancer is coming back.
You're not gonna be able to convince them.
They don't want any more tests, they don't wanna...
They can't argue with the mark of Cain.
I'm not going to change my mind. No more tests. God knows the way.
OK, let's start with the shirt.
What are you doing? What are you doing?
I'm on a mission from God.
If you won't let me undress you, then strip.
What's he doing? What's going on?
That woman you helped? You gave her a virus.
No, she's healed, I have a gift.
A gift is jewelry, socks.
What you have is herpes encephalitis.
And the only way you could've transmitted it
is by scratching one of your own sores and touching another person.
That's something you get from sex, right?
Either that or cold sores. Your kid got it from the sex.
No, no. No sores. No, my body's clean.
They examined me when I came in!
- No sores. - Herpes hides.
You have an outbreak, it goes away, it comes back, goes away. Strip!
Maybe you didn't have a sore when you came in, but you've got one now.
Dad, I've never, ever...
Do you wonder why a perfect child of God should feel so desperate
to "purify his body" that he needed to scarf down
a dozen gallons of water a day?
Boyd, is he right?
Dad! No, he's crazy! Help me! Dr Wilson, help!
God said no medicine, no procedures.
Taking off your clothes doesn't count as either of those.
This one's your call.
Son...
- Dad, you have to have faith in me. - I have faith in the Lord.
You, I trust, as much as you can trust a teenage boy.
Take off your clothes.
Relax.
A few Hail Marys, a little acyclovir,
you'll be picking up angels again in no time.
Come in.
My father told me I have to apologize to you.
You still hearing the voices?
You're lucky.
You go through life with a certainty that what you're doing is right.
I know how comforting that is.
Good luck.
You're not gonna give me my final point?
You knew it was me?
Who else?
You don't think God should get a point knocked off?
- The tumor shrank. - Because of a virus.
Do you know what the odds are?
She had to have the right type of cancer,
he had to have the right type of virus.
- The exposure... - She won the lottery.
You say "won the lottery", he says "miracle".
Yeah, the hand of God reached into this kid's pants, made him have sex
so he could scratch a rash and stick his fingers in some woman's face,
give her a few extra months.
Come on, he's just another liar and manipulator.
Well, nobody's as perfect as you are.
It is possible to believe in something and still fail to live up to it.
So, how's your girlfriend?
She got a little extra time out of this. Not a lot.
She didn't crash.
No. She says she's happier when she believes in something
bigger than she is.
She still believes.
Faith. She's going to Florence.
You moving out?
Yeah.
Moving back in with me?
I don't think that's a great idea.
But we're OK?
House, you are...
as God made you.