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Now, as you know, Aunt Robin

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is a big fan of Halloween...

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always dressing up

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in crazy costumes...

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Well she wasn't always that way.

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Back in 2005, she thought

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she was too cool for Halloween,

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unlike Aunt Lily.

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Guess what came

10
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in the mail today?

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Our costumes?

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Do they rule?

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They rule.

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And yours is 100% wool,

15
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so you won't

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get hypothermia

17
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like last year.

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Tarzan nipples blue.

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You know what I love

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about Halloween?

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It's the one night

22
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of the year

23
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chicks use to unleash

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their inner ho-bag.

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If a girl dresses

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up as a witch,

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she's a slutty witch.

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If she's a cat,

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she's a slutty cat.

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If she's a nurse...

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Wow, we get it.

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she's a slutty nurse.

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Robin, what are you doing

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for Halloween?

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Oh, I don't know.

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Probably hanging

37
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out with Mike,

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this guy I've

39
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been seeing.

40
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Mike? There's a Mike?

41
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You have a boyfriend

42
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and you haven't told us?

43
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No, I mean, he's

44
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not my boyfriend.

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He's just this guy

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I've been seeing

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for a couple of weeks.

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Boyfriend!

49
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So why haven't we met him?

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We're not really ready

51
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to go public yet.

52
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Married.

53
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How about we go on a

54
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Halloween double date?

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I don't know.

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We were kind of thinking

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about staying at home

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and dressing up

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as naked people.

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Come on, Robin, trot

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out your new fella.

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Let us judge and evaluate

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him behind your back.

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It'll be fun.

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Hey, Ted, you'll never guess

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what happened.

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Your costumes came?

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Our cost... Yes.

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That is why

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we're best friends.

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Hey, Ted, what are you

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doing for Halloween?

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Well...

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What?

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Every Halloween, Ted waits

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for the Slutty Pumpkin.

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That's right.

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What's the "Slutty Pumpkin"?

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You mean, "Who is

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the Slutty Pumpkin?"

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It was four years ago...

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I was at this Halloween party

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up on the roof of our building.

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I'm about to call it

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an early night

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when out of nowhere

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appeared this girl

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Wait, how can a pumpkin

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costume be sexy?

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It was carved

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in strategic places.

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So, uh, we're at the bar,

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and I see her mix Kahlua...

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Kahlua and root beer.

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A cocktail

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she invented herself.

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And she called it...

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"The Tootsie Roll..."

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Because it tastes

100
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like an alcoholic Tootsie Roll.

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Hey!

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Can I please tell the story?

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So we had

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this instant connection.

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She gave me her number,

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but then...

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Something went terribly wrong.

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Guys!

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Then something went

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terribly wrong.

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Happy Halloween.

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Sonny, where's Cher?

113
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Cher?

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Right here, babe.

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I just met

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the perfect woman.

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She's funny.

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She's beautiful.

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She loves Star Wars.

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Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

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What's her take on Ewoks?

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Loves 'em.

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Oh, good.

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I don't know why people

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are so cynical about Ewoks.

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The rebellion would have failed

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without the Ewoks.

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And get this:

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She's a marine biologist.

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She spent a year in Antarctica

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studying penguins.

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Oh, penguins are cool.

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Kind of like

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black and white Ewoks.

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I approve.

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Hey, where's my,

137
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uh, Kit-Kat?

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I put it right here

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on this table.

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I don't know,

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but we've plenty

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of chocolate here.

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No, no, you don't understand.

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I need that Kit-Kat;

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she wrote her number

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on that wrapper. Where is it?

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Uh-oh.

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Hey, Dracula!

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Come on, give me the...

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Give me it!

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Where's the Kit-Kat?

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Where's the Kit-Kat?

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Never found her number,

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never saw her again.

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But every year,

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they have

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a Halloween party

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up on the roof,

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so that's where I'll be.

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You know, Ted,

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it's been four years.

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She could be engaged

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or married,

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or, God forbid, fat.

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I don't know.

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I got a feeling.

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This could be the year.

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Halloween is a night

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of wonder and magic.

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All right, bring

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the mockery.

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Fine, I can take it.

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But, come on, wouldn't it be

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the coolest story ever

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if the Slutty Pumpkin

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turned out to be my future wife?

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Oh, on the off-chance

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that that could happen,

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maybe we should stop calling her

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the Slutty Pumpkin.

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That's a really good point.

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That's a good idea.

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Ted, is your

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world ready

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to be rocked,

186
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rocked, rocked?

187
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Can't wait.

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So...

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what do you think?

190
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So, what do you think?

191
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Wow.

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Marshall, are you wearing

193
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eyeliner?

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Oh, yeah.

195
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Weirdly hot, right?

196
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We are so going to win the

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costume contest this year.

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First prize: $50 gift

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certificate at the bar.

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And how much did you pay

201
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for your costumes?

202
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$100.

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Each.

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Well, I think

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you guys look great.

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What are you going as?

207
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Oh, like I even need to ask.

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Hey, I want the Slutty Pumpkin

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to recognize me,

210
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and she knows me as...

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a hanging chad.

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What? She thought

213
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it was hilarious.

214
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Yeah, four years ago,

215
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but nobody remembers

216
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what the hell a hanging chad is.

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What a sad commentary

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on our national

219
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attention span...

220
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that we could forget

221
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such a turbulent time

222
00:04:58,415 --> 00:05:00,626
in our political history.

223
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Sad commentary.

224
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All right,

225
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Polly got to pee.

226
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Again?

227
00:05:06,799 --> 00:05:08,300
Where you going?

228
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It's an elaborate costume.

229
00:05:13,681 --> 00:05:16,767
( power chords playing

230
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pop intro )

231
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No, no, not again,

232
00:05:35,369 --> 00:05:37,621
not this year.

233
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You're going as my wingman.

234
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Flight suit up.

235
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No thanks.

236
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I'm sticking with

237
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the hanging chad.

238
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Oh, you're dangerous,

239
00:05:43,293 --> 00:05:44,920
Maverick.

240
00:05:44,962 --> 00:05:47,339
Your ego's writing checks

241
00:05:44,962 --> 00:05:47,339
your body can't cash.

242
00:05:48,090 --> 00:05:49,217
Okay.

243
00:05:50,384 --> 00:05:52,720
Here's the plan,

244
00:05:50,384 --> 00:05:52,720
and I crap you not.

245
00:05:52,761 --> 00:05:53,929
I'm getting us

246
00:05:53,971 --> 00:05:57,892
into the Victoria's Secret

247
00:05:53,971 --> 00:05:57,892
Halloween Party.

248
00:05:57,933 --> 00:05:59,351
Trust me, by the end

249
00:05:57,933 --> 00:05:59,351
of the night,

250
00:05:59,393 --> 00:06:02,104
your chad will not

251
00:05:59,393 --> 00:06:02,104
be hanging.

252
00:06:02,146 --> 00:06:03,772
We can get rejected

253
00:06:02,146 --> 00:06:03,772
by supermodels

254
00:06:03,814 --> 00:06:04,899
any night of the year.

255
00:06:04,940 --> 00:06:06,108
Tonight I'm going

256
00:06:04,940 --> 00:06:06,108
up to the roof,

257
00:06:06,150 --> 00:06:07,359
I'm going to

258
00:06:06,150 --> 00:06:07,359
have a few beers,

259
00:06:07,401 --> 00:06:08,736
I'm going to wait for

260
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the Slutty Pumpkin.

261
00:06:08,777 --> 00:06:10,696
It's just what I do.

262
00:06:10,738 --> 00:06:13,241
Hmm. Victoria's Secret models

263
00:06:13,282 --> 00:06:15,617
prancing around in bras

264
00:06:13,282 --> 00:06:15,617
and panties...

265
00:06:15,659 --> 00:06:20,372
or Yale preppies reuniting

266
00:06:15,659 --> 00:06:20,372
their stupid a capella group.

267
00:06:20,414 --> 00:06:22,208
What's that, left hand?

268
00:06:20,414 --> 00:06:22,208
"Right hand sucks"?

269
00:06:22,250 --> 00:06:23,709
Word.

270
00:06:23,751 --> 00:06:24,919
Heading up to the roof.

271
00:06:24,960 --> 00:06:27,129
Well, boys, looks like

272
00:06:24,960 --> 00:06:27,129
it's just the three of us.

273
00:06:27,171 --> 00:06:28,881
What's that? "Self five"?

274
00:06:28,923 --> 00:06:29,965
Nice. We out.

275
00:06:32,426 --> 00:06:34,386
Hey, Chad,

276
00:06:32,426 --> 00:06:34,386
how's it hanging?

277
00:06:34,428 --> 00:06:36,972
Hey, word play, funny.

278
00:06:37,014 --> 00:06:39,725
Whoo, nice outfit.

279
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I'm a parrot.

280
00:06:40,935 --> 00:06:42,603
You sure are.

281
00:06:42,644 --> 00:06:43,604
Where's Mike?

282
00:06:43,645 --> 00:06:44,521
He's meeting me here.

283
00:06:44,563 --> 00:06:46,356
I ran late covering

284
00:06:44,563 --> 00:06:46,356
the Halloween parade

285
00:06:46,398 --> 00:06:47,399
in the Village.

286
00:06:47,441 --> 00:06:49,818
There are, like,

287
00:06:47,441 --> 00:06:49,818
a zillion gay pirates this year.

288
00:06:49,860 --> 00:06:52,696
Seriously,

289
00:06:49,860 --> 00:06:52,696
does my eyeliner look okay?

290
00:06:52,738 --> 00:06:54,573
Yes, it's weirdly hot.

291
00:06:54,615 --> 00:06:56,658
So, where's your costume?

292
00:06:56,700 --> 00:06:58,327
Uh, you know,

293
00:06:56,700 --> 00:06:58,327
Mike and I joked

294
00:06:58,368 --> 00:06:59,494
about doing

295
00:06:58,368 --> 00:06:59,494
something together,

296
00:06:59,536 --> 00:07:02,331
but we decided

297
00:06:59,536 --> 00:07:02,331
not to dress up.

298
00:07:03,249 --> 00:07:05,000
Oh, geez.

299
00:07:05,834 --> 00:07:06,919
Hi.

300
00:07:06,961 --> 00:07:07,920
Uh, everyone,

301
00:07:07,962 --> 00:07:08,921
this is Michael.

302
00:07:08,963 --> 00:07:11,381
That is not his real hair.

303
00:07:11,423 --> 00:07:13,175
Um, where's your

304
00:07:11,423 --> 00:07:13,175
costume, Gretel?

305
00:07:13,217 --> 00:07:14,593
You thought I was...

306
00:07:14,635 --> 00:07:16,428
Oh, I was just kidding.

307
00:07:16,470 --> 00:07:18,222
I've got to stop

308
00:07:16,470 --> 00:07:18,222
making jokes in e-mails.

309
00:07:18,264 --> 00:07:20,933
It's so hard to convey tone.

310
00:07:22,059 --> 00:07:23,727
I think we got them beat.

311
00:07:26,563 --> 00:07:29,441
I can't believe you

312
00:07:26,563 --> 00:07:29,441
talked me into this.

313
00:07:29,483 --> 00:07:32,069
I didn't.

314
00:07:29,483 --> 00:07:32,069
You followed me up here.

315
00:07:32,111 --> 00:07:34,363
This party sucks.

316
00:07:34,404 --> 00:07:37,199
There's seven

317
00:07:34,404 --> 00:07:37,199
chicks here.

318
00:07:37,241 --> 00:07:39,910
There's six

319
00:07:37,241 --> 00:07:39,910
chicks here.

320
00:07:39,952 --> 00:07:42,079
Relax. The night is young.

321
00:07:42,121 --> 00:07:43,580
It's going to get better.

322
00:07:43,622 --> 00:07:45,207
Ladies and gentlemen,

323
00:07:45,249 --> 00:07:48,336
as on pitch as they were

324
00:07:45,249 --> 00:07:48,336
at Spring Fling '95,

325
00:07:48,377 --> 00:07:51,588
it's my pleasure to welcome back

326
00:07:48,377 --> 00:07:51,588
the Shaggarats.

327
00:07:51,630 --> 00:07:53,215
Whoo!

328
00:07:53,257 --> 00:07:55,759
Whoo!

329
00:08:15,821 --> 00:08:17,489
What be a pirate's

330
00:08:17,531 --> 00:08:20,492
favorite kind

331
00:08:17,531 --> 00:08:20,492
of sweater?

332
00:08:20,534 --> 00:08:23,162
Arr-gyle.

333
00:08:24,163 --> 00:08:25,789
And what be

334
00:08:25,831 --> 00:08:31,420
a pirate's favorite

335
00:08:25,831 --> 00:08:31,420
fast food restaurant?

336
00:08:31,461 --> 00:08:34,173
Arr-by's.

337
00:08:35,257 --> 00:08:37,385
'Twould think it

338
00:08:35,257 --> 00:08:37,385
would be Arby's.

339
00:08:37,426 --> 00:08:39,553
But, actually, it's

340
00:08:37,426 --> 00:08:39,553
Long John Silver's.

341
00:08:40,971 --> 00:08:43,307
Actually, I kind of

342
00:08:40,971 --> 00:08:43,307
need this hand to eat.

343
00:08:43,349 --> 00:08:45,142
Oh..

344
00:08:46,560 --> 00:08:48,396
Oh, yeah.

345
00:08:49,313 --> 00:08:51,065
Oh, thank you.

346
00:08:51,106 --> 00:08:52,316
I'm starrr... ving!

347
00:08:52,358 --> 00:08:53,483
Thank you.

348
00:08:55,527 --> 00:08:57,196
It's so nice

349
00:08:55,527 --> 00:08:57,196
to meet you, Mike.

350
00:08:57,238 --> 00:08:58,697
You guys are

351
00:08:57,238 --> 00:08:58,697
really cute together.

352
00:08:58,739 --> 00:09:00,991
Yeah, we've been spending

353
00:08:58,739 --> 00:09:00,991
a lot of time together.

354
00:09:01,033 --> 00:09:03,493
We're even getting to that point

355
00:09:01,033 --> 00:09:03,493
where we finish each other's...

356
00:09:04,578 --> 00:09:06,288
This cheeseburger

357
00:09:04,578 --> 00:09:06,288
is so...

358
00:09:06,330 --> 00:09:08,332
Good. See?

359
00:09:09,917 --> 00:09:12,461
I think you won

360
00:09:09,917 --> 00:09:12,461
the dish-off tonight, baby.

361
00:09:12,502 --> 00:09:15,547
This steak totally

362
00:09:12,502 --> 00:09:15,547
bitch-slapped my pork chops.

363
00:09:15,589 --> 00:09:16,548
That may be true,

364
00:09:16,590 --> 00:09:20,552
but your rice pilaf kicked

365
00:09:16,590 --> 00:09:20,552
my spinach in the crotch

366
00:09:20,594 --> 00:09:22,763
so hard it threw up

367
00:09:20,594 --> 00:09:22,763
a little bit.

368
00:09:24,639 --> 00:09:25,849
Mmm... mmm.

369
00:09:25,891 --> 00:09:27,476
Mmm.

370
00:09:27,517 --> 00:09:29,686
Robin, you have

371
00:09:27,517 --> 00:09:29,686
to try this chicken.

372
00:09:29,728 --> 00:09:31,939
Oh, that's good.

373
00:09:29,728 --> 00:09:31,939
I'm okay. Thanks.

374
00:09:33,232 --> 00:09:34,524
It's really tasty.

375
00:09:34,566 --> 00:09:36,944
I'm just really feeling

376
00:09:34,566 --> 00:09:36,944
this cheeseburger.

377
00:09:36,985 --> 00:09:38,653
Come on.

378
00:09:38,695 --> 00:09:39,988
Just try a little bite.

379
00:09:40,030 --> 00:09:42,574
Dude, I'm kind of

380
00:09:40,030 --> 00:09:42,574
in the zone here.

381
00:09:45,744 --> 00:09:48,663
Oh, for God's sakes.

382
00:09:49,790 --> 00:09:53,001
Really tasty.

383
00:09:54,669 --> 00:09:57,714
( sustaining notes

384
00:09:54,669 --> 00:09:57,714
in harmony )

385
00:10:04,638 --> 00:10:06,056
Hey.

386
00:10:06,098 --> 00:10:07,808
Hey.

387
00:10:08,725 --> 00:10:10,978
So what does a fella

388
00:10:08,725 --> 00:10:10,978
have to do

389
00:10:11,019 --> 00:10:13,897
to get lei'd around here?

390
00:10:13,939 --> 00:10:17,567
Yeah.

391
00:10:17,609 --> 00:10:20,821
Right. 'Cause I'm

392
00:10:17,609 --> 00:10:20,821
wearing a lei.

393
00:10:20,862 --> 00:10:24,574
It isn't funny

394
00:10:20,862 --> 00:10:24,574
if you explain the joke.

395
00:10:26,701 --> 00:10:27,828
Let's bail.

396
00:10:27,869 --> 00:10:29,955
No, Barney, come on.

397
00:10:27,869 --> 00:10:29,955
I'm having fun.

398
00:10:29,997 --> 00:10:32,624
Plus, it's really great to

399
00:10:29,997 --> 00:10:32,624
see all these guys again.

400
00:10:32,666 --> 00:10:35,169
Name one person you know

401
00:10:32,666 --> 00:10:35,169
at this party.

402
00:10:35,210 --> 00:10:36,920
Well, there's Ninja,

403
00:10:36,962 --> 00:10:39,131
Back of Horse.

404
00:10:39,173 --> 00:10:40,632
Hey, where's

405
00:10:39,173 --> 00:10:40,632
Front of Horse?

406
00:10:40,674 --> 00:10:42,926
That guy's a riot.

407
00:10:40,674 --> 00:10:42,926
Where is he?

408
00:10:43,802 --> 00:10:45,595
Okay, I'm leaving.

409
00:10:45,637 --> 00:10:47,055
But just know that this

410
00:10:45,637 --> 00:10:47,055
Victoria's Secret party

411
00:10:47,097 --> 00:10:48,557
is on a yacht.

412
00:10:48,598 --> 00:10:50,642
And what will be sticking

413
00:10:48,598 --> 00:10:50,642
to that yacht?

414
00:10:50,684 --> 00:10:53,103
The "Barnacle."

415
00:10:53,145 --> 00:10:54,313
Really?

416
00:10:54,355 --> 00:10:55,647
That's your

417
00:10:54,355 --> 00:10:55,647
nickname now?

418
00:10:55,689 --> 00:10:56,648
Yeah, the Barnacle.

419
00:10:55,689 --> 00:10:56,648
The Barnacle?

420
00:10:56,690 --> 00:10:57,649
That's it.

421
00:10:58,692 --> 00:10:59,860
Barnacle out.

422
00:10:59,901 --> 00:11:02,112
Have fun, Barnacle.

423
00:11:04,532 --> 00:11:06,658
So... do you like Mike?

424
00:11:06,700 --> 00:11:08,035
Do you like Mike?

425
00:11:08,076 --> 00:11:09,661
Of course I do. Why?

426
00:11:09,703 --> 00:11:11,663
It just doesn't

427
00:11:09,703 --> 00:11:11,663
seem like it.

428
00:11:11,705 --> 00:11:14,666
You won't share your food.

429
00:11:11,705 --> 00:11:14,666
You won't wear a costume.

430
00:11:14,708 --> 00:11:16,126
Oh, Lily, you know me.

431
00:11:16,168 --> 00:11:18,045
I'm just not into

432
00:11:16,168 --> 00:11:18,045
all that coupley stuff.

433
00:11:18,086 --> 00:11:20,714
Okay, I know that stuff

434
00:11:18,086 --> 00:11:20,714
looks dumb from the outside,

435
00:11:20,755 --> 00:11:23,425
but it's kind of the

436
00:11:20,755 --> 00:11:23,425
greatest thing in the world

437
00:11:23,467 --> 00:11:24,676
when you're a part of it.

438
00:11:24,718 --> 00:11:25,802
If you just gave it

439
00:11:25,844 --> 00:11:27,888
a chance, you might like it.

440
00:11:27,929 --> 00:11:29,723
Are you trying to get me

441
00:11:27,929 --> 00:11:29,723
to join a cult?

442
00:11:29,764 --> 00:11:32,142
Robin, Mike likes you.

443
00:11:32,184 --> 00:11:33,852
If you don't start

444
00:11:32,184 --> 00:11:33,852
meeting him halfway,

445
00:11:33,894 --> 00:11:35,354
you're gonna lose him.

446
00:11:35,396 --> 00:11:36,104
What?

447
00:11:36,146 --> 00:11:37,565
Look, it's Halloween.

448
00:11:37,606 --> 00:11:40,650
Just put on the girlfriend

449
00:11:37,606 --> 00:11:40,650
costume for a night.

450
00:11:40,692 --> 00:11:43,695
Okay, well, what am I

451
00:11:40,692 --> 00:11:43,695
supposed to do,

452
00:11:43,737 --> 00:11:46,698
buy him a giant teddy bear

453
00:11:43,737 --> 00:11:46,698
or something?

454
00:11:46,740 --> 00:11:49,826
How about you start

455
00:11:46,740 --> 00:11:49,826
by sharing dessert?

456
00:11:49,868 --> 00:11:52,704
I can share dessert.

457
00:11:52,746 --> 00:11:53,705
Good.

458
00:11:53,747 --> 00:11:56,542
He better want

459
00:11:53,747 --> 00:11:56,542
the brownie sundae,

460
00:11:56,584 --> 00:12:00,170
but yeah, yeah,

461
00:11:56,584 --> 00:12:00,170
I can totally share.

462
00:12:09,679 --> 00:12:10,764
Barney?

463
00:12:10,805 --> 00:12:11,806
What, you're back?

464
00:12:11,848 --> 00:12:12,724
That's right.

465
00:12:12,766 --> 00:12:14,309
In a totally

466
00:12:12,766 --> 00:12:14,309
new costume.

467
00:12:14,351 --> 00:12:17,687
Every Halloween

468
00:12:14,351 --> 00:12:17,687
I bring a spare costume,

469
00:12:17,729 --> 00:12:20,524
in case I strike out with

470
00:12:17,729 --> 00:12:20,524
the hottest girl at the party.

471
00:12:20,566 --> 00:12:23,735
That way I have a second chance

472
00:12:20,566 --> 00:12:23,735
to make a first impression.

473
00:12:24,778 --> 00:12:26,029
What's with the face?

474
00:12:26,071 --> 00:12:27,739
It's half you're pathetic,

475
00:12:26,071 --> 00:12:27,739
half I have to pee.

476
00:12:27,781 --> 00:12:30,033
So go to the bathroom.

477
00:12:27,781 --> 00:12:30,033
No, there's a huge line.

478
00:12:30,075 --> 00:12:32,536
I don't want to miss

479
00:12:30,075 --> 00:12:32,536
the "Slutty Pumpkin."

480
00:12:32,578 --> 00:12:34,121
So pee off the roof.

481
00:12:34,162 --> 00:12:35,747
Ooh, Ted,

482
00:12:34,162 --> 00:12:35,747
pee off the roof.

483
00:12:35,789 --> 00:12:37,749
Whoa, I wouldn't do

484
00:12:35,789 --> 00:12:37,749
that if I were you.

485
00:12:37,791 --> 00:12:39,418
There's people

486
00:12:37,791 --> 00:12:39,418
walking down there.

487
00:12:39,460 --> 00:12:41,753
Come on, Ted,

488
00:12:39,460 --> 00:12:41,753
who you gonna listen to?

489
00:12:41,795 --> 00:12:45,424
Me or Mr. Goody-Goody

490
00:12:41,795 --> 00:12:45,424
over there?

491
00:12:45,466 --> 00:12:48,760
Yeah, whatever. You

492
00:12:45,466 --> 00:12:48,760
guys got some weed?

493
00:12:48,802 --> 00:12:51,513
A little

494
00:12:48,802 --> 00:12:51,513
to the left, Marshall.

495
00:12:51,555 --> 00:12:52,806
Lily, squat down.

496
00:12:52,847 --> 00:12:54,433
This is gonna be a slaughter.

497
00:12:54,475 --> 00:12:58,145
None of these other costumes

498
00:12:54,475 --> 00:12:58,145
even come close to ourrr... s!

499
00:12:58,186 --> 00:13:01,440
Take the damn

500
00:12:58,186 --> 00:13:01,440
picture.

501
00:13:01,482 --> 00:13:02,774
Got it.

502
00:13:02,816 --> 00:13:05,611
I still think we should have won

503
00:13:02,816 --> 00:13:05,611
as Sonny and Cher.

504
00:13:05,653 --> 00:13:07,779
Maybe if I'd worn

505
00:13:05,653 --> 00:13:07,779
the red dress. Huh.

506
00:13:07,821 --> 00:13:10,198
If I could

507
00:13:07,821 --> 00:13:10,198
turn back time.

508
00:13:12,033 --> 00:13:13,785
Oh, wow, this sundae

509
00:13:12,033 --> 00:13:13,785
looks so good.

510
00:13:13,827 --> 00:13:14,995
I could eat

511
00:13:13,827 --> 00:13:14,995
the whole thing.

512
00:13:15,036 --> 00:13:18,748
But, um, I would

513
00:13:15,036 --> 00:13:18,748
much rather share

514
00:13:18,790 --> 00:13:21,335
this small one-scoop sundae

515
00:13:18,790 --> 00:13:21,335
with you, Mike.

516
00:13:21,376 --> 00:13:23,795
Apple tart? Excellent

517
00:13:21,376 --> 00:13:23,795
choice, Lily-pad.

518
00:13:23,837 --> 00:13:26,131
Thanks, Marshmallow.

519
00:13:26,173 --> 00:13:29,759
Well, let's dig in, Mi... Mi...

520
00:13:26,173 --> 00:13:29,759
Microwave Oven.

521
00:13:32,804 --> 00:13:34,806
Let me guess.

522
00:13:34,848 --> 00:13:38,185
Every guy's used the lei'd line

523
00:13:34,848 --> 00:13:38,185
on you tonight, huh?

524
00:13:38,226 --> 00:13:39,811
You wouldn't believe.

525
00:13:39,853 --> 00:13:42,189
I apologize for my gender.

526
00:13:42,230 --> 00:13:43,815
Let me make it up to you.

527
00:13:42,230 --> 00:13:43,815
Make you a drink?

528
00:13:43,857 --> 00:13:45,025
Oh.

529
00:13:45,066 --> 00:13:46,818
You certainly are

530
00:13:45,066 --> 00:13:46,818
a charming devil.

531
00:13:46,860 --> 00:13:50,739
I'm also a "horny" devil.

532
00:13:50,780 --> 00:13:51,906
Yeah.

533
00:13:53,534 --> 00:13:54,868
No.

534
00:13:59,873 --> 00:14:01,041
Oh, go to hell.

535
00:14:05,045 --> 00:14:06,338
You know,

536
00:14:06,380 --> 00:14:07,839
if you guys

537
00:14:06,380 --> 00:14:07,839
like tiramisu,

538
00:14:07,881 --> 00:14:09,090
we found this little

539
00:14:07,881 --> 00:14:09,090
Italian place...

540
00:14:09,132 --> 00:14:11,051
No, you found it.

541
00:14:09,132 --> 00:14:11,051
I came with you.

542
00:14:11,885 --> 00:14:13,679
Go on.

543
00:14:13,721 --> 00:14:15,847
I'm just saying,

544
00:14:13,721 --> 00:14:15,847
we love tiramisu.

545
00:14:15,889 --> 00:14:17,849
I cannot get

546
00:14:15,889 --> 00:14:17,849
enough of it.

547
00:14:17,891 --> 00:14:19,267
We're crazy for the stuff.

548
00:14:19,309 --> 00:14:21,311
I'm crazy, and

549
00:14:19,309 --> 00:14:21,311
you're crazy...

550
00:14:22,229 --> 00:14:23,480
for tiramisu.

551
00:14:24,272 --> 00:14:24,981
Right.

552
00:14:26,483 --> 00:14:27,442
Mm-hmm.

553
00:14:27,484 --> 00:14:28,860
Am I wrong saying that?

554
00:14:27,484 --> 00:14:28,860
No, no, no.

555
00:14:28,902 --> 00:14:30,111
I mean, it just sounds

556
00:14:28,902 --> 00:14:30,111
a little bit weird.

557
00:14:30,153 --> 00:14:31,238
Doesn't it?

558
00:14:31,279 --> 00:14:32,864
We love tiramisu?

559
00:14:32,906 --> 00:14:34,866
Isn't really a group activity.

560
00:14:34,908 --> 00:14:36,868
Loving tiramisu?

561
00:14:36,910 --> 00:14:38,746
Right?

562
00:14:39,913 --> 00:14:43,875
So this Italian place,

563
00:14:39,913 --> 00:14:43,875
how is their cannoli?

564
00:14:43,917 --> 00:14:45,252
Oh!

565
00:14:45,293 --> 00:14:46,836
Easy there, hungry.

566
00:14:50,006 --> 00:14:52,050
Mmm.

567
00:14:52,092 --> 00:14:54,720
Yeah, looks like we're

568
00:14:52,092 --> 00:14:54,720
both hungry.

569
00:14:55,845 --> 00:14:56,888
Hey, is that Gary Oldman?

570
00:14:56,930 --> 00:14:57,889
Wait... where?

571
00:15:01,226 --> 00:15:02,561
I don't see...

572
00:15:08,358 --> 00:15:09,943
Brain freeze.

573
00:15:12,070 --> 00:15:14,489
Okay, Victoria's Secret party,

574
00:15:12,070 --> 00:15:14,489
right now.

575
00:15:14,531 --> 00:15:15,616
Nope.

576
00:15:14,531 --> 00:15:15,616
Come on.

577
00:15:15,657 --> 00:15:17,200
I can't stand watching

578
00:15:15,657 --> 00:15:17,200
my delusional friend

579
00:15:17,242 --> 00:15:18,993
waste another

580
00:15:17,242 --> 00:15:18,993
precious Halloween.

581
00:15:19,035 --> 00:15:21,413
Ted, the "Slutty Pumpkin"

582
00:15:19,035 --> 00:15:21,413
is not coming.

583
00:15:21,455 --> 00:15:22,623
She might.

584
00:15:23,915 --> 00:15:25,250
Come on, Barney, this

585
00:15:23,915 --> 00:15:25,250
is not about the odds.

586
00:15:25,292 --> 00:15:26,376
It's about believing.

587
00:15:26,418 --> 00:15:27,419
This girl, she...

588
00:15:27,461 --> 00:15:29,003
she represents

589
00:15:27,461 --> 00:15:29,003
something to me.

590
00:15:29,045 --> 00:15:30,380
I don't know.

591
00:15:30,422 --> 00:15:31,590
Hope.

592
00:15:31,632 --> 00:15:34,884
Wow.

593
00:15:34,926 --> 00:15:36,886
I did not understand

594
00:15:34,926 --> 00:15:36,886
a word you just said.

595
00:15:39,013 --> 00:15:42,517
Lingerie models on a boat!

596
00:15:42,559 --> 00:15:44,645
See ya.

597
00:15:44,686 --> 00:15:46,938
No. See ya.

598
00:15:47,939 --> 00:15:49,107
Ow!

599
00:15:51,318 --> 00:15:53,445
Want to drink

600
00:15:51,318 --> 00:15:53,445
the melty part?

601
00:15:53,487 --> 00:15:54,696
You know what?

602
00:15:54,738 --> 00:15:56,030
It's getting late.

603
00:15:56,990 --> 00:15:57,949
I think I'm gonna

604
00:15:57,991 --> 00:15:58,950
take off.

605
00:15:58,992 --> 00:16:00,786
Hey.

606
00:16:00,828 --> 00:16:03,371
I thought we were gonna

607
00:16:00,828 --> 00:16:03,371
follow those breadcrumbs

608
00:16:03,413 --> 00:16:05,206
back to my place, Hansel.

609
00:16:05,248 --> 00:16:07,709
Robin, I don't get the sense

610
00:16:05,248 --> 00:16:07,709
you like being with me.

611
00:16:07,751 --> 00:16:09,252
I like being with you.

612
00:16:09,294 --> 00:16:10,838
Not as much as you

613
00:16:09,294 --> 00:16:10,838
like being alone.

614
00:16:10,879 --> 00:16:12,213
You like...

615
00:16:12,255 --> 00:16:14,299
eating your own food,

616
00:16:12,255 --> 00:16:14,299
sleeping in your own bed,

617
00:16:14,341 --> 00:16:15,717
doing your own crosswords.

618
00:16:15,759 --> 00:16:17,469
Who uses ink?

619
00:16:18,553 --> 00:16:19,888
Sorry.

620
00:16:19,929 --> 00:16:21,890
Okay, I'm a bit

621
00:16:19,929 --> 00:16:21,890
set in my ways.

622
00:16:21,973 --> 00:16:23,558
That doesn't mean

623
00:16:21,973 --> 00:16:23,558
that this won't work.

624
00:16:23,600 --> 00:16:25,853
Actually, it kind of does.

625
00:16:25,894 --> 00:16:27,979
Wait. Are we breaking up?

626
00:16:28,021 --> 00:16:30,649
No, we aren't

627
00:16:28,021 --> 00:16:30,649
breaking up.

628
00:16:30,691 --> 00:16:33,652
I'm breaking

629
00:16:30,691 --> 00:16:33,652
up with you.

630
00:16:36,946 --> 00:16:42,952
And then just as I was

631
00:16:36,946 --> 00:16:42,952
about to lose hope...

632
00:16:46,331 --> 00:16:48,958
She spent a year in Antarctica

633
00:16:46,331 --> 00:16:48,958
studying penguins.

634
00:16:50,043 --> 00:16:52,880
Kahlua, root beer...

635
00:16:52,921 --> 00:16:54,631
Could this penguin be

636
00:16:54,673 --> 00:16:57,467
the "Slutty Pumpkin?"

637
00:17:06,226 --> 00:17:08,019
Uh, excuse me.

638
00:17:08,061 --> 00:17:10,021
This is going to sound crazy,

639
00:17:10,063 --> 00:17:12,273
but I met someone

640
00:17:10,063 --> 00:17:12,273
up on this roof four years ago,

641
00:17:12,315 --> 00:17:16,820
and they mixed that cocktail,

642
00:17:12,315 --> 00:17:16,820
and-and they loved penguins.

643
00:17:16,862 --> 00:17:19,865
By any chance, was that you?

644
00:17:21,074 --> 00:17:23,243
It's you.

645
00:17:23,284 --> 00:17:25,995
Everyone thought

646
00:17:23,284 --> 00:17:25,995
I was crazy, but I came...

647
00:17:26,037 --> 00:17:27,080
You are such a loser.

648
00:17:28,081 --> 00:17:30,667
Come on, I came

649
00:17:28,081 --> 00:17:30,667
back for you, Ted.

650
00:17:30,709 --> 00:17:32,669
I penguin-suited up

651
00:17:32,711 --> 00:17:34,254
to show you the

652
00:17:32,711 --> 00:17:34,254
error of your ways.

653
00:17:34,295 --> 00:17:36,047
And to score

654
00:17:34,295 --> 00:17:36,047
Hula Girl's number.

655
00:17:36,089 --> 00:17:37,841
Check and check.

656
00:17:37,883 --> 00:17:39,050
Unbelievable.

657
00:17:39,092 --> 00:17:41,052
Yes, it is.

658
00:17:41,094 --> 00:17:42,804
Oh. Wait a minute.

659
00:17:42,846 --> 00:17:44,347
You're that lame army guy.

660
00:17:44,389 --> 00:17:46,057
What? No, No,

661
00:17:44,389 --> 00:17:46,057
that's some other guy,

662
00:17:46,099 --> 00:17:47,976
and he was a kick-ass

663
00:17:46,099 --> 00:17:47,976
fighter pilot.

664
00:17:48,017 --> 00:17:49,185
I cannot believe I

665
00:17:48,017 --> 00:17:49,185
gave you my number.

666
00:17:49,227 --> 00:17:50,812
Yeah, well, you did. Thanks.

667
00:17:50,854 --> 00:17:51,772
Yeah. Well, give it back.

668
00:17:51,813 --> 00:17:52,647
Well, uh, I don't think so.

669
00:17:52,689 --> 00:17:53,648
I earned it fair and square.

670
00:17:53,690 --> 00:17:54,691
I'm calling you.

671
00:17:54,733 --> 00:17:57,151
But I'm never gonna

672
00:17:54,733 --> 00:17:57,151
go out with you.

673
00:17:57,193 --> 00:17:59,070
But how will you know it's me?

674
00:17:59,112 --> 00:18:01,322
I'm a master of disguise.

675
00:18:01,364 --> 00:18:03,074
Yeah.

676
00:18:07,161 --> 00:18:08,413
Nice.

677
00:18:08,455 --> 00:18:09,748
Come on, Ted.

678
00:18:09,790 --> 00:18:11,583
Victoria's Secret party,

679
00:18:09,790 --> 00:18:11,583
now, let's go.

680
00:18:11,625 --> 00:18:12,793
I'm staying.

681
00:18:12,834 --> 00:18:16,087
Fine! Fine...

682
00:18:16,129 --> 00:18:17,005
What are you doing?

683
00:18:17,046 --> 00:18:19,925
I'm flippering you off.

684
00:18:22,803 --> 00:18:25,013
Oh, sweetie,

685
00:18:22,803 --> 00:18:25,013
I'm so sorry.

686
00:18:25,054 --> 00:18:26,097
Seriously,

687
00:18:26,139 --> 00:18:27,348
it's not a big deal.

688
00:18:27,390 --> 00:18:29,977
He wanted to be a we,

689
00:18:27,390 --> 00:18:29,977
and I wanted to be an I.

690
00:18:30,018 --> 00:18:32,980
Dudes are such chicks.

691
00:18:33,021 --> 00:18:34,773
Hmm.

692
00:18:34,815 --> 00:18:35,774
You guys, I'm fine.

693
00:18:35,816 --> 00:18:37,108
Ladies and

694
00:18:37,150 --> 00:18:39,027
gentlemen, the results are in.

695
00:18:39,068 --> 00:18:40,946
And the winners

696
00:18:39,068 --> 00:18:40,946
of this year's

697
00:18:40,988 --> 00:18:42,530
costume contest are...

698
00:18:42,572 --> 00:18:44,741
Lily Aldren

699
00:18:42,572 --> 00:18:44,741
as a parrot,

700
00:18:44,783 --> 00:18:46,868
and Marshall Erikson

701
00:18:44,783 --> 00:18:46,868
as a gay pirate!

702
00:18:46,910 --> 00:18:48,119
Oh, yeah!

703
00:18:48,161 --> 00:18:49,621
Wait, what did he say?

704
00:18:49,663 --> 00:18:51,873
Oh, who cares, Marshall?

705
00:18:49,663 --> 00:18:51,873
We won!

706
00:18:51,915 --> 00:18:54,125
Wait. Gay pirate...

707
00:18:51,915 --> 00:18:54,125
where are you getting that from?

708
00:18:54,167 --> 00:18:55,585
Dude, you're

709
00:18:54,167 --> 00:18:55,585
wearing eyeliner.

710
00:18:55,627 --> 00:18:56,878
Okay.

711
00:18:56,920 --> 00:18:59,798
I just want everybody here

712
00:18:56,920 --> 00:18:59,798
to know I'm not a gay pirate.

713
00:18:59,840 --> 00:19:01,800
I have sex

714
00:18:59,840 --> 00:19:01,800
with my parrot all the time.

715
00:19:01,842 --> 00:19:03,677
That came out wrong.

716
00:19:04,678 --> 00:19:05,846
Oh, yeah, doesn't matter.

717
00:19:05,887 --> 00:19:07,096
We won!

718
00:19:07,138 --> 00:19:09,140
I love you,

719
00:19:07,138 --> 00:19:09,140
Marshmallow.

720
00:19:09,182 --> 00:19:10,517
I love you, too, Lily Pad.

721
00:19:10,558 --> 00:19:12,226
You guys, let me

722
00:19:10,558 --> 00:19:12,226
get a picture.

723
00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:29,243
I had a feeling

724
00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:29,243
I'd find you here.

725
00:19:29,285 --> 00:19:30,745
Oh, hey.

726
00:19:30,787 --> 00:19:32,413
If you're here

727
00:19:30,787 --> 00:19:32,413
for the Shaggarats,

728
00:19:32,455 --> 00:19:34,624
you just missed

729
00:19:32,455 --> 00:19:34,624
the fourth encore.

730
00:19:34,666 --> 00:19:38,086
I never played any team sports.

731
00:19:38,127 --> 00:19:39,880
Are we playing "I never"?

732
00:19:39,921 --> 00:19:42,173
'Cause there's nothing left

733
00:19:39,921 --> 00:19:42,173
but peach schnapps.

734
00:19:42,215 --> 00:19:44,718
I played tennis in high school.

735
00:19:44,759 --> 00:19:45,969
You know why?

736
00:19:46,011 --> 00:19:47,554
Because it was just me

737
00:19:46,011 --> 00:19:47,554
out there.

738
00:19:47,595 --> 00:19:49,764
I couldn't even stand

739
00:19:47,595 --> 00:19:49,764
playing doubles.

740
00:19:51,016 --> 00:19:53,060
I just got dumped.

741
00:19:53,101 --> 00:19:55,729
Oh, man, that sucks.

742
00:19:55,770 --> 00:19:57,188
Yeah. It's okay.

743
00:19:57,230 --> 00:19:58,940
I wasn't that into him.

744
00:19:58,982 --> 00:20:00,191
Story of my life.

745
00:20:00,233 --> 00:20:01,818
Everyone else is off

746
00:20:01,860 --> 00:20:04,237
falling in love

747
00:20:01,860 --> 00:20:04,237
and acting stupid and goofy

748
00:20:04,278 --> 00:20:06,865
and sweet and insane,

749
00:20:04,278 --> 00:20:06,865
but not me.

750
00:20:06,907 --> 00:20:08,241
Why don't I

751
00:20:08,282 --> 00:20:09,743
want that more?

752
00:20:09,784 --> 00:20:11,327
I want to want that.

753
00:20:11,369 --> 00:20:13,872
Am I wired wrong or something?

754
00:20:13,914 --> 00:20:14,915
No.

755
00:20:14,956 --> 00:20:16,708
Look, you didn't want to be

756
00:20:14,956 --> 00:20:16,708
with me,

757
00:20:16,750 --> 00:20:19,210
so, clearly,

758
00:20:16,750 --> 00:20:19,210
you have abysmal taste in men.

759
00:20:20,837 --> 00:20:22,923
But you're wired just fine.

760
00:20:22,964 --> 00:20:25,550
Well, what if I'm just a...

761
00:20:25,592 --> 00:20:28,219
a cold person?

762
00:20:28,261 --> 00:20:30,304
Tonight Mike was willing to look

763
00:20:30,346 --> 00:20:33,558
like a complete idiot for me,

764
00:20:30,346 --> 00:20:33,558
but I couldn't be Gretel.

765
00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:36,436
Why can't I be Gretel?

766
00:20:36,477 --> 00:20:38,772
Because you just haven't met

767
00:20:36,477 --> 00:20:38,772
the right Hansel yet.

768
00:20:38,813 --> 00:20:41,066
Hey, one day, you're

769
00:20:38,813 --> 00:20:41,066
gonna meet a guy

770
00:20:41,108 --> 00:20:43,359
who's gonna make you want to

771
00:20:41,108 --> 00:20:43,359
look like a complete idiot.

772
00:20:43,401 --> 00:20:44,736
Really?

773
00:20:44,778 --> 00:20:46,237
Yeah. He's out there somewhere.

774
00:20:46,279 --> 00:20:49,908
Just like the Slutty Pumpkin...

775
00:20:46,279 --> 00:20:49,908
pumpkin, pumpkin...

776
00:20:50,784 --> 00:20:53,036
How do you do this, Ted?

777
00:20:53,078 --> 00:20:54,245
How do you

778
00:20:54,287 --> 00:20:57,124
sit out here all night

779
00:20:54,287 --> 00:20:57,124
on the roof in the cold,

780
00:20:57,165 --> 00:20:59,834
and still have faith

781
00:20:57,165 --> 00:20:59,834
your pumpkin's gonna show up?

782
00:20:59,876 --> 00:21:02,796
Well, I'm pretty drunk.

783
00:21:04,005 --> 00:21:06,507
Look, I know that odds are

784
00:21:06,549 --> 00:21:09,260
the love of my life isn't gonna

785
00:21:06,549 --> 00:21:09,260
magically walk through that door

786
00:21:09,302 --> 00:21:13,347
in a pumpkin costume

787
00:21:09,302 --> 00:21:13,347
at 2:43 in the morning, but...

788
00:21:13,389 --> 00:21:16,267
this seems as nice a spot

789
00:21:13,389 --> 00:21:16,267
as any to just,

790
00:21:16,309 --> 00:21:20,229
you know, sit and wait.

791
00:21:37,622 --> 00:21:41,668
Captioned by

792
00:21:37,622 --> 00:21:41,668
Media Access Group at WGBH

793
00:21:37,622 --> 00:21:41,668
access.wgbh.org