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In May of 2007,
Aunt Lily and Uncle Marshall got married

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at the historic Van Smoot
House in upstate New York.

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Wow, it's beautiful, Lily.

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Yeah. It's just how
I always pictured it.

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Well, that was a load of crap.

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You see, kids, when you get married,
you learn a hard lesson.

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The wedding you set out to have is
almost never the wedding you end up with.

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So, we've decided on a small,
outdoor wedding,

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just family and close friends.

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No more than 25 people

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in a beautiful
garden somewhere,

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maybe an acoustic
guitar playing

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while we walk down the aisle.

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And maybe you already know someone
who went down to the courthouse

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and registered as an officiant

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so that he or she— he—

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could perform the ceremony.

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But you hate marriage.
Why do you want to perform the ceremony?

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Because it subtly implants in
the mind of every woman there

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that when I ask a question,

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you say, "I do."

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Yeah.

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The closer you get
to the big day,

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the more concessions you make.

25
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Great. Now my mom's making
me invite the Lessners.

26
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This puts our numbers
in the triple digits.

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Wow. I guess sometimes,
Lessner is more... ner.

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You know how like
sometimes less is more.

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Yeah. This is one of
those times, sweetie?

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You know what? That's okay.
It'll be a slightly big outdoor wedding.

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So it's not going to be an
outdoor wedding anymore.

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Marshall's dad is convinced if we
have an outdoor wedding in New York,

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he's going to get mugged,
so it's going to be inside now.

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It'll be great. We're still going
to have our acoustic guitar player.

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So now,
instead of an acoustic guitar,

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we're having a harp player.

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Yeah. My dad owes a guy, and...
that guy's daughter plays the harp.

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Is she hot? I'd love to be able to
cross "harp player" off my list.

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How long is this list?

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Dude, I'm not gonna count
how many pages the list is.

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I'm not crass.

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Well, it doesn't matter anyway.
She's pregnant.

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Sweet! I can cross
off two things.

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Raceman

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Willow's Team

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www.forom.com

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And the day arrives for Lily and
Marshall's very big indoor wedding...

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with a harp.

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Hi, Lily.

50
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Wow. Andrea.

51
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You really are pregnant.

52
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Yeah.

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How do you play the harp
with your belly so...?

54
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Oh, I don't really—
I can only reach about half the strings.

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You only play half the harp?

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Yeah.

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Oh, no. Uh, okay.
Lily, I will take care of this.

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Um, I'll just pluck the other half.
Is it hard to learn?

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I've been studying
the harp for 12 years.

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Yeah, but I'm a fast learner.

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You ever hear of "Guitar Hero"?
Learned that in a day.

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Is there a "Harp Hero"?

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Robin, it's fine.

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So, so, when are you due?

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Tuesday.

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Wow, that's soon.

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Last Tuesday.

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Holy crap, we have to fire her.

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She's gonna drop a shorty in
the middle of your ceremony.

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Robin, I'm not going
to freak myself out.

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I hate those women who say,

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"Oh, my wedding
has to be perfect."

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Things go wrong. Sometimes the
deejay screws up your playlist.

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Sometimes you slip on placenta
during the recessional.

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Can I grab a scotch
and soda real quick?

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No. I'm not allowed to serve
anything until the reception.

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Wow. You just cost
yourself a big tip, buddy.

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I'm not allowed to
accept tips, buddy.

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You allowed to
accept criticism?

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You, sir, are an ass... buddy.

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Hey, you want to know what line
doesn't work on a harp player?

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"Hey, baby, want to pluck?"

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Really? That didn't work.

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Not even a little.

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Hey! Who's Bill?

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Bill?

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Yeah. This guy came
up to me at the bar.

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Can I ask you something?

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Where in the ceremony is the place
where they ask if anyone objects?

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Uh... Don't think
they do that anymore.

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Oh, so when do you think
someone should do it?

92
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Just wait for a lull or what?

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Oh, no.

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Did he look like a guy who tried
to be an umpire but failed?

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He kind of did.

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That's Scooter.

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Your high school
boyfriend, Scooter?

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His real name is Bill.

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My mom must have invited him.

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Why? Why would she do that?

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Our families are really close.

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But my ex-boyfriend?

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Come on, Mom.

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I didn't invite that professional
squash player Dad busted you with.

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Oh, I need a glass of wine.

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I'll get it.

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Oh, thanks.
Hey, how's Marshall doing?

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He's great.

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He's about to get his hair cut.

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Oh. I'm worried my cousin's
going to cut it too short.

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Me, too. I was up all night.

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Hello, Lily.

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Hey, Bill.

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Hey, Barney.

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Scooter, what are
you doing here?

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It's not "Scooter" anymore.

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It's Bill.

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A lot of things have
changed about me, Lily,

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but one hasn't.

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I still love you.

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And I came here
to win you back.

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You're really cute.
Oh, no. Really?

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Lily, I-I know it's crazy,

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but I love you,

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and if you can
look me in the eye

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and tell me that you
want to marry Marshall,

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I will leave right now and
be out of your life forever.

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I want...

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I want...

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Scooter!

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I need a glass of wine.

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And I need you to
get out of my face.

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It's for the bride, so...

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White or red?

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White.

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And, uh...
she'd also like a scotch and soda.

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You got it.

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She'd also like a bowl
of smoked almonds.

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I don't have any,

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but I guess I could run out
to the corner and get some.

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Well, it's only the biggest
day of her life, so...

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Let the games begin.

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Here. Can't stay.
Got to try something.

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Maybe my words won't
change your mind,

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but maybe the words
of a poet will.

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I read from "November Rain."

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By W. Axl Rose.

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That is a good song.

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Barney said you needed me to
bounce some guy named Scooter?

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What's up with Bill?

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That's Scooter.

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I'm on it.

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- Hey.
- Hey.

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Can I have your phone number?

155
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No.

156
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It's for the bride.

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Oh. Hold on.
Let me go get a pen.

158
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The bride wants
you to walk slower.

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Oh, wow.

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Oh. Robin...

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My makeup looks
perfect right now,

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and I'm about to cry.
Do something.

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I have hairy nipples.

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Really?

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No, but it worked, didn't it?

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Hey. Funny story.

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I tackled this guy I
thought was Scooter.

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Turns out it was
your photographer.

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Don't worry. I got this sweet
camera phone, so we're covered.

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There's a photographer?

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Oh, my God.

172
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- Okay, I just have to call...
- Robin, stop. Stop.

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It's okay.

174
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I am not gonna let
anything get to me today.

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I just got a call from the florist.
The flowers won't be here

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till halfway through
the ceremony.

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I'm okay.

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I hate to bother you, but... I think
I found your veil in the parking lot.

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I'm fine.

180
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Just FYI: my water broke.

181
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But I can probably...

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make it through.

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Totally cool.

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Oh, no.

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Lily, I think I forgot
your bridal panties.

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I-I thought I had them.
I'm so sorry.

187
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Oh, it's okay,
I'll just wear the ones I have on.

188
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Are you sure?

189
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I'm marrying Marshall today.

190
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So it doesn't even matter that
I'm gonna walk down the aisle

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without a veil in a room
that has no flowers

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to the music of half a harp
played by a woman who's crowning,

193
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as my high school boyfriend
reads Guns N' Roses lyrics.

194
00:08:09,436 --> 00:08:10,502
But that's okay,

195
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because there's no photographer there
to take any pictures of it anyway.

196
00:08:15,567 --> 00:08:16,970
Lily, are you okay?

197
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What do you think?
Of course I'm not okay!

198
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Everything that could possibly
go wrong at my wedding has!

199
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It's ruined!

200
00:08:24,155 --> 00:08:26,040
What happened to "I don't
want a perfect wedding"?

201
00:08:26,076 --> 00:08:29,741
Oh, grow up, Robin!
Of course I want a perfect wedding!

202
00:08:30,216 --> 00:08:34,790
Oh, God. I wanted... I wanted not
to care about the wedding, but...

203
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I do. I... I'm supposed to
feel like a princess today.

204
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And you will.

205
00:08:40,454 --> 00:08:42,629
It's gonna be okay, sweetie.

206
00:08:42,737 --> 00:08:45,630
Why don't we go outside? I have
something that'll make you feel better.

207
00:08:45,735 --> 00:08:48,949
What could you have that could
possibly make me feel better?

208
00:08:53,365 --> 00:08:56,652
God, I hope Marshall's having
a better day than I'm having.

209
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Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

210
00:09:00,184 --> 00:09:01,522
Oh, my God.

211
00:09:02,144 --> 00:09:03,440
Oh, my God.

212
00:09:03,834 --> 00:09:05,921
- Oh, my God!
- What?

213
00:09:13,615 --> 00:09:15,530
Well, it's not too short.

214
00:09:28,957 --> 00:09:32,770
My hair! Look at my hair!
She ruined my hair!

215
00:09:32,877 --> 00:09:35,011
I look like one of
the Backstreet Boys!

216
00:09:35,118 --> 00:09:36,023
You totally do.

217
00:09:36,128 --> 00:09:37,580
And not even the good
Backstreet Boys,

218
00:09:37,618 --> 00:09:41,022
the older, lame dance move,
comeback tour Backstreet Boys.

219
00:09:41,678 --> 00:09:43,713
The good Backstreet Boys?

220
00:09:43,816 --> 00:09:45,863
Guys! Guys!
What am I gonna do?

221
00:09:45,968 --> 00:09:47,850
What-what the hell
happened to you?

222
00:09:47,957 --> 00:09:49,612
Lily's cousin is
in beauty school,

223
00:09:49,715 --> 00:09:51,510
and Lily didn't want
her to do her hair,

224
00:09:51,615 --> 00:09:53,372
so she said she could do mine.

225
00:09:53,477 --> 00:09:55,973
So, um,
just not-not too short, okay?

226
00:09:56,078 --> 00:09:58,183
Oh, no,
we don't even have to cut it at all.

227
00:09:58,288 --> 00:09:59,951
Could just give it some style.

228
00:10:00,056 --> 00:10:01,163
Oh, okay, yeah, that's great.

229
00:10:01,197 --> 00:10:03,813
'Cause, um, when it gets too short,
it starts to look weird.

230
00:10:03,918 --> 00:10:06,053
And I don't want to look weird
when I'm up there, you know.

231
00:10:06,086 --> 00:10:08,582
Ooh, I could give you
some cool guy tips.

232
00:10:09,038 --> 00:10:11,552
I don't think I need
advice on how to be cool,

233
00:10:11,657 --> 00:10:14,002
but yeah, great,
lay that on me.

234
00:10:15,207 --> 00:10:17,930
I can't get married like this!
There's no way!

235
00:10:18,035 --> 00:10:19,440
Ah, let me see what I can do.

236
00:10:19,548 --> 00:10:21,323
What? What can you do?

237
00:10:21,875 --> 00:10:23,482
I have a superpower.

238
00:10:24,218 --> 00:10:26,430
Lily is gonna kill me!

239
00:10:26,538 --> 00:10:27,443
Look at me!

240
00:10:27,547 --> 00:10:29,141
She's not gonna want
to marry me like this.

241
00:10:29,178 --> 00:10:30,801
That's crazy.
Of course she will.

242
00:10:30,906 --> 00:10:31,870
Would you marry me?

243
00:10:31,976 --> 00:10:34,590
No. But not because of the hair.
It's because I have a rule:

244
00:10:34,695 --> 00:10:37,520
never marry anyone you've
had a farting contest with.

245
00:10:37,627 --> 00:10:41,540
Oh, great. So now you're saying Lily
and I shouldn't even get married?

246
00:10:44,055 --> 00:10:45,982
Could I have everyone's
attention, please?

247
00:10:47,015 --> 00:10:48,683
It's for the bride.

248
00:10:50,758 --> 00:10:53,570
One, the bride would...

249
00:10:53,677 --> 00:10:56,430
like all of this tension
out of my shoulders.

250
00:10:56,536 --> 00:10:59,202
And she would like, let's say,

251
00:10:59,306 --> 00:11:01,990
you in the inappropriately
short dress to rub them.

252
00:11:02,096 --> 00:11:03,370
Two...

253
00:11:05,288 --> 00:11:06,692
What was two?

254
00:11:07,837 --> 00:11:10,253
Okay, we have a
bit of a situation.

255
00:11:11,587 --> 00:11:12,971
Let's not panic.

256
00:11:13,888 --> 00:11:15,730
Let's just find a solution.

257
00:11:30,765 --> 00:11:33,803
Dude, you shaved
your freakin' head.

258
00:11:33,908 --> 00:11:35,840
Yeah, yeah, but it's good.

259
00:11:35,946 --> 00:11:38,743
I ought to shave it all off.
What a great solution.

260
00:11:38,846 --> 00:11:41,223
Just be bald 'cause
it's cool, right?

261
00:11:41,326 --> 00:11:43,863
Bruce Willis, Michael Jordan,
Britney Spears...

262
00:11:43,967 --> 00:11:46,020
Oh, God, what did I do?

263
00:11:46,126 --> 00:11:47,792
How could you let
me shave my head?

264
00:11:47,896 --> 00:11:49,550
- What?
- You're the worst best man ever!

265
00:11:49,657 --> 00:11:50,810
I hate you!

266
00:11:50,915 --> 00:11:53,433
I'm not going out there!
I'm leaving and I'm never coming back.

267
00:11:53,446 --> 00:11:55,461
I'm gonna go find that money
under the rock by the tree

268
00:11:55,495 --> 00:11:57,670
and go live with the guys on
the beach in Zihautanejo.

269
00:11:57,777 --> 00:11:58,770
Dude, those guys are criminals.

270
00:11:58,807 --> 00:12:01,330
Only Red Andy was
falsely accused.

271
00:12:01,445 --> 00:12:04,023
Ted, you're my best man!
You got to do something!

272
00:12:04,126 --> 00:12:06,731
Okay, all right, come here.
Just breathe, breathe, all right?

273
00:12:06,835 --> 00:12:08,912
Don't worry. Don't worry.

274
00:12:10,405 --> 00:12:12,911
- I'll just... I'll take these.
- No!

275
00:12:17,036 --> 00:12:19,743
- Uh, hi. Uncle Ben, right?
- Yes.

276
00:12:19,846 --> 00:12:22,843
Yes, we're, we're having a little
bit of a problem back there.

277
00:12:22,945 --> 00:12:24,902
Um, and I was wondering
if you could help us out.

278
00:12:24,927 --> 00:12:25,860
Yeah.

279
00:12:26,725 --> 00:12:31,121
Marshall accidentally
shaved part of his head.

280
00:12:31,228 --> 00:12:32,850
- Oh, no!
- Yeah.

281
00:12:32,955 --> 00:12:34,830
Yeah, so here's what
I was thinking.

282
00:12:34,935 --> 00:12:40,381
What if I found something
to cover up the bald area?

283
00:12:40,485 --> 00:12:42,990
Yeah, that would probably work,

284
00:12:43,097 --> 00:12:44,461
but with what?

285
00:12:46,068 --> 00:12:47,591
That's a tough one.

286
00:12:48,928 --> 00:12:52,102
Maybe a wig of some
sort or a, um...

287
00:12:52,205 --> 00:12:53,320
toupee.

288
00:12:53,427 --> 00:12:55,332
Something that matches
his hair color,

289
00:12:55,436 --> 00:13:00,083
which is, which is kind of the same
color as the top of your hair.

290
00:13:00,578 --> 00:13:03,110
Mm, yeah.

291
00:13:03,828 --> 00:13:05,903
Does anyone here wear a toupee?

292
00:13:06,317 --> 00:13:07,721
Shouldn't be hard to find out.

293
00:13:07,827 --> 00:13:09,253
Most of them are pretty bad.

294
00:13:09,356 --> 00:13:11,801
That is true. That is true.

295
00:13:11,907 --> 00:13:14,402
We just need to find
someone who wears a toupee

296
00:13:14,505 --> 00:13:16,351
that is the same color

297
00:13:16,455 --> 00:13:20,561
as Marshall's and your hair.

298
00:13:21,728 --> 00:13:23,913
Boy, that's a
pretty tall order.

299
00:13:24,016 --> 00:13:25,281
Really?

300
00:13:25,445 --> 00:13:28,410
You can't think of any
place in the general area

301
00:13:28,517 --> 00:13:30,742
where there might be a toupee of
the kind I'm describing to you?

302
00:13:30,776 --> 00:13:32,982
No, not off the top of my...

303
00:13:34,896 --> 00:13:37,451
No. Can't.

304
00:13:37,557 --> 00:13:40,083
Let me come at this from a different
angle. I got $50 in my pocket

305
00:13:40,116 --> 00:13:42,401
- which is probably a lot more...
- The bride needs this.

306
00:13:58,986 --> 00:14:00,941
Actually, I think
it kinda works.

307
00:14:01,306 --> 00:14:03,112
It totally does.

308
00:14:04,825 --> 00:14:05,981
Barney?

309
00:14:08,516 --> 00:14:10,292
To be honest, I'm, uh,

310
00:14:10,707 --> 00:14:12,933
I'm jealous I don't
get to wear it.

311
00:14:19,858 --> 00:14:21,701
Okay, problem solved.

312
00:14:21,807 --> 00:14:22,752
Crisis averted.

313
00:14:22,858 --> 00:14:24,390
Let's get me married.

314
00:14:24,498 --> 00:14:26,260
It looks terrible, doesn't it?

315
00:14:26,946 --> 00:14:28,560
It kinda looks like fur,

316
00:14:28,665 --> 00:14:31,341
which gives you the appearance
of a cleaned-up Bigfoot.

317
00:14:31,445 --> 00:14:33,450
- Oh, you know...
- In a bad way.

318
00:14:34,205 --> 00:14:36,713
Hey. Cool hair, bro.

319
00:14:37,068 --> 00:14:38,102
What happened to your shirt?

320
00:14:38,135 --> 00:14:40,520
I got sauce on it when
I tackled the caterer.

321
00:14:41,167 --> 00:14:42,342
You gonna put another shirt on?

322
00:14:42,376 --> 00:14:43,352
No, I'm good.

323
00:14:43,455 --> 00:14:45,072
Hey, you guys seen Scooter?

324
00:14:45,178 --> 00:14:48,763
What? What? Scooter's here?
That guy's at my wedding?

325
00:14:48,867 --> 00:14:50,493
Not for long, bro.

326
00:14:50,685 --> 00:14:52,243
Not for long.

327
00:14:55,667 --> 00:14:57,563
Okay, you know what?
I need some air.

328
00:14:57,667 --> 00:14:59,821
I think we should go
for a walk, okay?

329
00:15:02,465 --> 00:15:04,472
It would cover up the problem.

330
00:15:04,678 --> 00:15:05,783
It's festive

331
00:15:05,886 --> 00:15:08,752
and it celebrates the heritage
of this great nation.

332
00:15:08,858 --> 00:15:11,272
Okay, unless you actually
have one in your car,

333
00:15:11,376 --> 00:15:14,280
stop suggesting authentic
Native American headdress.

334
00:15:14,606 --> 00:15:15,732
Oh, no.

335
00:15:15,838 --> 00:15:17,803
Oh, my God!

336
00:15:19,078 --> 00:15:20,052
Marshall...

337
00:15:20,155 --> 00:15:21,843
Lily, you're not
supposed to see me.

338
00:15:21,947 --> 00:15:24,823
Holy crap, I don't think
anyone's supposed to see you.

339
00:15:25,247 --> 00:15:27,323
What happened?
Did Amy do this to you?

340
00:15:27,428 --> 00:15:30,160
Just the frosted tips.
I did the rest. I'm sorry, baby.

341
00:15:30,266 --> 00:15:32,072
I've ruined the whole wedding,
haven't I?

342
00:15:32,178 --> 00:15:34,420
Oh, no,
you didn't ruin the wedding, sweetie.

343
00:15:34,527 --> 00:15:35,913
It was already ruined.

344
00:15:36,015 --> 00:15:37,722
There's no flowers,
no photographer.

345
00:15:37,828 --> 00:15:39,580
Oh, and Scooter's here,
by the way.

346
00:15:39,688 --> 00:15:40,561
Yeah, I know. I heard.

347
00:15:40,667 --> 00:15:43,641
My veil got thrashed,
the harp player is in labor,

348
00:15:43,747 --> 00:15:45,823
and I'm not wearing
my wedding underwear.

349
00:15:45,928 --> 00:15:48,433
What? No "Property of
Marshall" across the back?

350
00:15:48,538 --> 00:15:50,542
How are people going to
know whose butt that is?

351
00:15:50,645 --> 00:15:52,290
What happened?

352
00:15:52,395 --> 00:15:57,360
Remember the wedding we wanted,
the intimate outdoor ceremony?

353
00:15:57,465 --> 00:15:59,213
I wish we could
have that wedding.

354
00:16:02,107 --> 00:16:03,281
So do it.

355
00:16:03,387 --> 00:16:04,152
What?

356
00:16:04,258 --> 00:16:05,631
Get married now.

357
00:16:05,857 --> 00:16:07,050
Right here.

358
00:16:07,157 --> 00:16:09,472
Look, it's outside like
you always wanted.

359
00:16:09,575 --> 00:16:11,581
Intimate, close friends.

360
00:16:11,687 --> 00:16:14,260
There's no guitar,
but it's pretty close.

361
00:16:14,366 --> 00:16:16,143
Barney can officiate.

362
00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:20,033
Yes. Yes, I can.

363
00:16:20,517 --> 00:16:23,411
Uh, excuse me, guys.
You all dropped something:

364
00:16:23,515 --> 00:16:24,762
your jaws—

365
00:16:24,865 --> 00:16:29,281
because Barney Stinson is about
to aid and abet a marriage.

366
00:16:30,126 --> 00:16:32,841
Could we even do that? I mean,
what about all those people in there?

367
00:16:32,905 --> 00:16:34,981
Do that one, too.
And then when everything goes wrong,

368
00:16:35,018 --> 00:16:38,052
you won't care because you already
had the real wedding out here.

369
00:16:40,175 --> 00:16:41,550
What do you think, baby?

370
00:16:42,048 --> 00:16:43,523
I love it.

371
00:16:43,666 --> 00:16:44,820
Me, too.

372
00:16:44,927 --> 00:16:47,921
Let's do it.
Let's get married before we get married.

373
00:16:48,326 --> 00:16:49,301
Great.

374
00:16:49,647 --> 00:16:51,310
Wait, hold on.

375
00:16:52,888 --> 00:16:54,391
Excuse me, sir.

376
00:16:54,497 --> 00:16:56,623
Could we borrow your hat?

377
00:16:57,897 --> 00:16:58,832
Okay.

378
00:16:58,936 --> 00:17:00,242
Thank you.

379
00:17:08,477 --> 00:17:09,592
Hat.

380
00:17:09,856 --> 00:17:12,243
We thought of authentic
Native American headdress

381
00:17:12,348 --> 00:17:14,370
before we thought of hat.

382
00:17:16,377 --> 00:17:17,962
Thank you all for coming.

383
00:17:19,328 --> 00:17:21,732
For those of you
who don't know me...

384
00:17:22,507 --> 00:17:25,100
I'm not the biggest
believer in marriage.

385
00:17:26,815 --> 00:17:31,711
But... you two are so great together,
you know?

386
00:17:35,776 --> 00:17:39,732
It's like you were, uh,
made for each other.

387
00:17:39,897 --> 00:17:42,053
- He's gonna cry.
- No, I'm not.

388
00:17:47,547 --> 00:17:49,490
I'm not, I'm not, I'm not,
I'm not, I'm not.

389
00:17:55,316 --> 00:17:56,800
Lily and Marshall...

390
00:17:58,105 --> 00:18:00,623
when everyone sees you, they...

391
00:18:01,185 --> 00:18:02,781
see true love.

392
00:18:05,537 --> 00:18:07,263
It's the best love...

393
00:18:11,155 --> 00:18:15,603
Can we just, um,
move on to the rings or something?

394
00:18:18,885 --> 00:18:20,222
Oh, no.

395
00:18:21,447 --> 00:18:22,713
I don't have my vows.

396
00:18:22,818 --> 00:18:24,242
I don't have mine either.

397
00:18:24,345 --> 00:18:27,753
You don't need your vows.
Just say why you love each other.

398
00:18:30,417 --> 00:18:31,781
Okay, I'll go first.

399
00:18:34,356 --> 00:18:35,481
Lily,

400
00:18:36,315 --> 00:18:39,000
there are a million
reasons why I love you.

401
00:18:40,055 --> 00:18:41,340
You make me laugh

402
00:18:41,667 --> 00:18:44,092
and you take care of
me when I'm sick.

403
00:18:44,465 --> 00:18:49,203
You're sweet, caring and you even
created an egg dish and named it after me.

404
00:18:49,307 --> 00:18:52,053
She puts a little Italian dressing in
scrambled eggs before she cooks them.

405
00:18:52,088 --> 00:18:54,731
It's called "Eggs Marshall,"
and it's awesome.

406
00:18:56,468 --> 00:18:59,231
But the main reason
that I love you is

407
00:18:59,338 --> 00:19:01,263
that you're my
best friend, Lily.

408
00:19:01,466 --> 00:19:04,272
You're, uh...
you're the best friend I ever had.

409
00:19:04,797 --> 00:19:06,373
- I'm sorry, buddy.
- No problem.

410
00:19:06,478 --> 00:19:07,753
It's totally okay.

411
00:19:09,187 --> 00:19:10,361
My turn.

412
00:19:10,726 --> 00:19:12,213
Oh, thank you.

413
00:19:13,127 --> 00:19:18,040
Marshall, I love you
because you're funny

414
00:19:18,145 --> 00:19:20,730
and you make me feel loved

415
00:19:20,837 --> 00:19:23,493
and you make me feel safe

416
00:19:23,595 --> 00:19:27,263
and for our anniversary you
gave me a sweatshirt that says,

417
00:19:27,367 --> 00:19:30,643
"Lily and Marshall.
Rockin' It Since '96."

418
00:19:31,368 --> 00:19:33,703
I kinda wish I was
wearing it right now

419
00:19:33,806 --> 00:19:36,851
'cause it smells like you.

420
00:19:37,686 --> 00:19:40,840
But the main reason I love you,
Marshall Ericksen,

421
00:19:40,947 --> 00:19:43,871
is you make me happy.

422
00:19:44,375 --> 00:19:46,643
You make me happy all the time.

423
00:19:51,318 --> 00:19:53,452
Hey, I found your panties!

424
00:19:54,166 --> 00:19:55,563
I'm good.

425
00:19:57,867 --> 00:20:00,350
Marshall, do you take Lily to be your wife
to have and to hold from this day forward?

426
00:20:00,385 --> 00:20:01,200
- Slow down.
- I can't.

427
00:20:01,236 --> 00:20:03,243
From this day forward so as
long as you both shall live?

428
00:20:03,277 --> 00:20:04,242
I do.

429
00:20:04,348 --> 00:20:07,843
Lily, do you promise to take Marshall to
be your husband to have and to hold... live?

430
00:20:07,946 --> 00:20:08,602
I do.

431
00:20:08,705 --> 00:20:09,930
Okay, then,

432
00:20:10,077 --> 00:20:13,993
by the power invested in me by
the very bitter old Pakistani man

433
00:20:14,098 --> 00:20:16,593
who works down at the
courthouse on Lafayette Street,

434
00:20:16,755 --> 00:20:20,000
I now pronounce
you man and wife.

435
00:20:20,367 --> 00:20:21,962
You may kiss the bride.

436
00:20:29,417 --> 00:20:31,331
- Do you smoke?
- No.

437
00:20:31,435 --> 00:20:34,942
Wow. First lie of marriage.
That was fast.

438
00:20:36,847 --> 00:20:39,950
After that, we all went back
inside for the second wedding.

439
00:20:40,056 --> 00:20:42,000
And yes,
a lot of things did go wrong,

440
00:20:42,107 --> 00:20:43,160
but it didn't matter

441
00:20:43,265 --> 00:20:45,403
because when I look
back on that day,

442
00:20:45,508 --> 00:20:47,443
what I remember is
the first wedding;

443
00:20:47,545 --> 00:20:49,562
the intimate outdoor ceremony

444
00:20:49,667 --> 00:20:51,321
with just close friends

445
00:20:51,428 --> 00:20:53,330
and an acoustic guitar.

446
00:21:07,089 --> 00:21:08,253
How do you feel?

447
00:21:08,369 --> 00:21:11,441
Tired. I got
married twice today.

448
00:21:15,448 --> 00:21:18,252
So where do you want to do it for
the first time as a married couple,

449
00:21:18,356 --> 00:21:21,141
nice hotel room or a
reception hall bathroom?

450
00:21:21,248 --> 00:21:22,581
What do you think?

451
00:21:22,687 --> 00:21:24,762
Bathroom, of course.

452
00:21:25,728 --> 00:21:27,373
Please don't.

453
00:21:28,947 --> 00:21:30,443
- Sorry, Ted.
- Sorry, Ted.

454
00:21:30,548 --> 00:21:31,284
Raceman
Willow's Team
www.forom.com