1
00:00:01,169 --> 00:00:04,169
Ladies and gentlemen,
for the first time ever

2
00:00:04,269 --> 00:00:09,369
Mr. And Marshall Eriksen
and Lily Aldrin.

3
00:00:14,469 --> 00:00:18,469
Does it make you kind of sad that
we don't share the same last name?

4
00:00:18,669 --> 00:00:22,369
You know, in a totally evolved
21st-century kind of way,

5
00:00:22,469 --> 00:00:23,769
yeah, a little.

6
00:00:24,369 --> 00:00:25,669
You know what we should do?

7
00:00:25,769 --> 00:00:28,069
We should come up with
a whole new last name.

8
00:00:28,169 --> 00:00:31,469
Oh, that's easy—
Lily and Marshall Skywalker.

9
00:00:32,069 --> 00:00:34,269
Lily and Marshall Hasselhoff.

10
00:00:35,269 --> 00:00:36,669
I got it. You ready?

11
00:00:36,769 --> 00:00:37,669
- You ready?
- Yeah.

12
00:00:37,769 --> 00:00:39,969
Lily and Marshall Awesome.

13
00:00:40,669 --> 00:00:42,169
Have you met the Awesomes?

14
00:00:42,269 --> 00:00:45,469
Marshall, Lily, their son,
Totally and their daughter, Freakin'?

15
00:00:46,269 --> 00:00:48,069
I love you, Mr. Awesome.

16
00:00:48,169 --> 00:00:49,969
I love you, Mrs. Awesome.

17
00:00:53,169 --> 00:00:54,769
- So...
- So...

18
00:00:54,869 --> 00:00:56,169
Wedding's over.

19
00:00:56,269 --> 00:00:57,569
Yes, it is.

20
00:00:57,669 --> 00:00:59,869
I guess starting tomorrow,

21
00:00:59,969 --> 00:01:01,369
we can tell people.

22
00:01:01,869 --> 00:01:03,169
Tell people what?

23
00:01:03,769 --> 00:01:04,669
Hi, Barney.

24
00:01:04,769 --> 00:01:05,869
Tell people what?

25
00:01:05,969 --> 00:01:07,469
The food looks delicious,
doesn't it?

26
00:01:07,469 --> 00:01:08,669
Tell people what?

27
00:01:08,769 --> 00:01:09,469
Nothing.

28
00:01:09,569 --> 00:01:11,869
Oh, okay. Tell people what?

29
00:01:11,969 --> 00:01:13,069
Can we talk about this later?

30
00:01:13,169 --> 00:01:14,969
Absolutely. Tell people what?

31
00:01:15,069 --> 00:01:17,769
- Hi. Have you met Barney?
- Hey. Barney Stinson.

32
00:01:17,869 --> 00:01:19,869
Lovely dress.
I know, I'm sick of these things, too.

33
00:01:19,969 --> 00:01:22,269
It's like the same wedding over and
over again. You're totally right.

34
00:01:22,369 --> 00:01:24,869
You want to dance? Great,
see you out there. Tell people what?

35
00:01:25,569 --> 00:01:28,769
Look, this is just not something we want
to talk about right now, okay, Barney?

36
00:01:30,669 --> 00:01:31,669
Okay.

37
00:01:33,569 --> 00:01:35,269
Whoo, that was a close one.

38
00:01:35,369 --> 00:01:37,069
Think he'll actually let it go?

39
00:01:37,169 --> 00:01:39,469
Tell people what?
Tell people what? Tell people what?

40
00:01:39,569 --> 00:01:41,669
Tell people what?
Tell people...

41
00:01:42,969 --> 00:01:46,269
There's a black Nissan Stanza in
the parking lot with it's lights on.

42
00:01:46,369 --> 00:01:47,869
Tell people what?
Tell people what?

43
00:01:48,469 --> 00:01:50,769
Subtitles : Willow's Team

44
00:01:51,069 --> 00:01:52,869
Transcript : Raceman

45
00:01:53,069 --> 00:01:54,669
www.forom.com

46
00:02:03,342 --> 00:02:05,042
Can I get a water please?

47
00:02:05,342 --> 00:02:06,942
- Tell people what?
- Oh, God! Okay.

48
00:02:07,042 --> 00:02:10,242
Look, we have some... news.

49
00:02:10,342 --> 00:02:13,742
But we don't want to draw attention
away from Lily and Marshall's big day.

50
00:02:13,842 --> 00:02:16,542
So just forget about it until
they leave for the honeymoon.

51
00:02:16,642 --> 00:02:17,742
Fine.

52
00:02:19,042 --> 00:02:22,042
- It's pretty big, though.
- Oh, my God, just tell me!

53
00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:23,842
- Oh, help us.
- What's wrong?

54
00:02:23,942 --> 00:02:25,242
We're starving.

55
00:02:25,342 --> 00:02:27,242
We planned this amazing
meal with the caterers,

56
00:02:27,342 --> 00:02:28,942
and we haven't
had a bite of it.

57
00:02:29,042 --> 00:02:32,142
Every time we get near the food,
we get cocktail weiner blocked.

58
00:02:34,542 --> 00:02:35,842
Marshall!

59
00:03:00,542 --> 00:03:02,142
We haven't eaten all day.

60
00:03:02,242 --> 00:03:03,542
All right,
let's run some interference.

61
00:03:03,642 --> 00:03:05,742
Yeah, we'll get you back to your table.
Come on.

62
00:03:06,942 --> 00:03:09,242
Oh, there you are.

63
00:03:09,342 --> 00:03:11,742
My dear, you look so beautiful.

64
00:03:11,842 --> 00:03:13,242
Thanks, Grammie,
but we really need to...

65
00:03:13,242 --> 00:03:16,842
And you...
you look like a 1940s movie star.

66
00:03:16,942 --> 00:03:19,542
And you look like a pepper-crusted
rack of lamb with mint jelly.

67
00:03:19,642 --> 00:03:21,642
All right,
let's get these two back to their table.

68
00:03:21,642 --> 00:03:25,242
We will see you on the floor for
the conga line later, won't we?

69
00:03:25,342 --> 00:03:28,442
The answer to that one
was decided weeks earlier.

70
00:03:30,342 --> 00:03:31,342
Conga line.

71
00:03:31,442 --> 00:03:33,542
Oh, yes, definitely.

72
00:03:33,742 --> 00:03:36,542
How about a slide show of
you guys through the years

73
00:03:36,642 --> 00:03:39,442
set to Green Day's
"Time of Your Life"

74
00:03:39,542 --> 00:03:42,442
and ending with your baby
photos side by side.

75
00:03:42,542 --> 00:03:45,842
Oh, that's great.
Going on the list.

76
00:03:45,942 --> 00:03:46,742
What list?

77
00:03:46,842 --> 00:03:51,142
Horrible wedding clichés we're not going
to touch with a ten-foot limbo pole.

78
00:03:51,242 --> 00:03:53,242
Oh, like First Corinthians?

79
00:03:53,342 --> 00:03:54,642
That Bible verse?

80
00:03:54,742 --> 00:03:55,942
They do that at every wedding.

81
00:03:56,042 --> 00:03:56,942
How's it go?

82
00:03:57,042 --> 00:03:59,542
"Love is patient and kind.

83
00:03:59,642 --> 00:04:01,442
"Love does not envy or boast.

84
00:04:01,542 --> 00:04:03,742
"It is not arrogant or rude.

85
00:04:03,842 --> 00:04:05,942
"Love does not insist
on it's own way.

86
00:04:06,042 --> 00:04:08,942
"It is not irritable
or resentful.

87
00:04:09,042 --> 00:04:10,742
"Love bears all things,

88
00:04:11,242 --> 00:04:13,042
"believes all things,

89
00:04:13,442 --> 00:04:15,142
"hopes all things...

90
00:04:15,842 --> 00:04:17,642
"endures all things."

91
00:04:19,842 --> 00:04:21,842
- Lame.
- Going on the list.

92
00:04:22,242 --> 00:04:25,442
We've done it.
A wedding with zero clichés.

93
00:04:25,542 --> 00:04:28,742
Wait, isn't doing it in the reception
hall bathroom kind of a cliché?

94
00:04:28,842 --> 00:04:30,342
Well, okay, one cliché.

95
00:04:30,442 --> 00:04:32,442
Well, technically two.

96
00:04:33,242 --> 00:04:36,142
No! They cleared
our plates again!

97
00:04:36,242 --> 00:04:39,542
Pepper-crusted rack of lamb,
where did you go?

98
00:04:39,942 --> 00:04:43,242
It's my wedding night.
I was supposed to have my way with you.

99
00:04:43,642 --> 00:04:45,542
Well, you still have me.

100
00:04:45,642 --> 00:04:46,742
Yeah...

101
00:04:48,042 --> 00:04:50,242
Anyway, guys, we're kind of
in the middle of something,

102
00:04:50,342 --> 00:04:53,242
so if you could go bicker or
share a tense, sexless silence

103
00:04:53,342 --> 00:04:55,542
or whatever married people do
somewhere else, that'd be great.

104
00:04:55,642 --> 00:04:57,442
No, Barney, this is my wedding,

105
00:04:57,542 --> 00:04:59,242
and I will sit wherever
I damn well...

106
00:04:59,342 --> 00:05:00,742
Are those mini quiches?

107
00:05:02,242 --> 00:05:03,642
Tell the secret.

108
00:05:03,742 --> 00:05:05,242
Okay, uh...

109
00:05:05,342 --> 00:05:06,942
it was our anniversary,

110
00:05:07,042 --> 00:05:08,842
so we went to this
restaurant Carmichael's,

111
00:05:08,942 --> 00:05:10,842
which is where we went
on our first date.

112
00:05:11,442 --> 00:05:14,642
Remember, the place where I stole
the blue French horn for Robin?

113
00:05:14,942 --> 00:05:16,642
Oh, right, that was you.

114
00:05:16,742 --> 00:05:18,542
I knew that was
somebody I knew.

115
00:05:18,642 --> 00:05:19,442
What?

116
00:05:19,542 --> 00:05:20,642
Dude, you were there.

117
00:05:20,742 --> 00:05:24,142
That was like a big iconic
moment in all of our lives.

118
00:05:24,242 --> 00:05:26,642
Maybe in your life—
I got a lot of stuff going on.

119
00:05:27,542 --> 00:05:30,842
Okay, so we're sitting there
and the waiter comes over...

120
00:05:31,042 --> 00:05:32,242
Champagne?

121
00:05:32,342 --> 00:05:34,342
Um, we didn't order champagne.

122
00:05:34,442 --> 00:05:35,842
Compliments of the house.

123
00:05:35,942 --> 00:05:36,742
Wow.

124
00:05:36,842 --> 00:05:38,242
Thanks.

125
00:05:39,742 --> 00:05:40,642
Cheers.

126
00:05:40,742 --> 00:05:43,942
And there, sitting at the bottom
of my champagne glass is...

127
00:05:44,042 --> 00:05:45,042
Mini quiche.

128
00:05:45,142 --> 00:05:46,842
You're a mega-douche.

129
00:05:46,942 --> 00:05:49,842
Oh, that's right, they moved that
table back toward the kitchen,

130
00:05:49,942 --> 00:05:52,442
because that's where they're setting
up a surprise chocolate fountain.

131
00:05:52,442 --> 00:05:54,542
Oh, no, I gave it away.

132
00:05:59,042 --> 00:06:00,542
So what was in the glass?

133
00:06:00,642 --> 00:06:01,442
Right.

134
00:06:01,542 --> 00:06:04,142
So the waiter comes up
with two glasses of Dom.

135
00:06:04,242 --> 00:06:06,442
He says, "Champagne?"
"We didn't order any champagne."

136
00:06:06,542 --> 00:06:08,042
"Compliments of
the house."Wow."

137
00:06:08,142 --> 00:06:09,942
You said that already!

138
00:06:10,042 --> 00:06:12,342
Right. So Robin looks down,

139
00:06:12,442 --> 00:06:15,342
and there at the
bottom of her glass...

140
00:06:15,442 --> 00:06:17,542
Is an engagement ring.

141
00:06:19,742 --> 00:06:21,942
Anything you want to say
to the bride and groom?

142
00:06:22,042 --> 00:06:24,242
Don't get married.

143
00:06:25,442 --> 00:06:27,242
Why don't I come back.

144
00:06:33,527 --> 00:06:35,327
An engagement ring?

145
00:06:35,427 --> 00:06:37,527
No. No, no, no, no, no, no.

146
00:06:37,627 --> 00:06:39,227
Ted, you cannot do
this to me. No.

147
00:06:39,327 --> 00:06:40,727
No, no, no!

148
00:06:42,627 --> 00:06:44,227
That's what she said.

149
00:06:44,527 --> 00:06:45,627
No.

150
00:06:46,227 --> 00:06:49,427
No, no, no, no, no.
Ted, you cannot do this to me.

151
00:06:49,527 --> 00:06:51,427
No. No, no, no.

152
00:06:51,527 --> 00:06:52,727
What are you talking about?

153
00:06:52,827 --> 00:06:56,527
This. This is what I'm talking about.
What is this doing in my champagne?

154
00:06:56,627 --> 00:06:58,627
Oh, God, listen...
I just got to get out of here.

155
00:06:58,727 --> 00:07:00,127
That's not mine.

156
00:07:00,227 --> 00:07:01,327
What?

157
00:07:01,427 --> 00:07:03,127
That's not mine.

158
00:07:03,227 --> 00:07:04,727
Then whose is it?

159
00:07:05,327 --> 00:07:06,527
It's mine.

160
00:07:10,227 --> 00:07:11,427
Janna...

161
00:07:11,627 --> 00:07:13,427
will you marry me?

162
00:07:13,527 --> 00:07:15,027
Yes.

163
00:07:21,627 --> 00:07:22,827
Wow.

164
00:07:23,927 --> 00:07:28,027
That was hilarious.
I was like... what?

165
00:07:28,627 --> 00:07:29,927
Anyway.

166
00:07:31,127 --> 00:07:32,627
What the hell was that?

167
00:07:33,027 --> 00:07:34,527
What the hell was what?

168
00:07:34,627 --> 00:07:36,327
That reaction?

169
00:07:36,627 --> 00:07:38,127
I thought you were
proposing to me.

170
00:07:38,227 --> 00:07:41,627
Really? Because it sounded like you
thought I was trying to set you on fire.

171
00:07:41,727 --> 00:07:43,927
Ted, you know how I
feel about marriage.

172
00:07:44,027 --> 00:07:45,327
Now more than ever.

173
00:07:45,427 --> 00:07:47,527
I'm sorry,
were you planning on proposing tonight?

174
00:07:47,627 --> 00:07:48,227
No.

175
00:07:48,227 --> 00:07:49,227
Then why is this an issue?

176
00:07:49,327 --> 00:07:50,927
Because even though you
don't want to get married,

177
00:07:50,927 --> 00:07:53,027
I'd like to think the fact that
we've been together for a year,

178
00:07:53,127 --> 00:07:55,527
and that we love each other
might get me a gentler reaction

179
00:07:55,627 --> 00:07:58,727
than, "No.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

180
00:07:58,827 --> 00:08:00,627
"Ted, you cannot do this to me.

181
00:08:00,727 --> 00:08:03,127
"No. No, no, no."

182
00:08:04,127 --> 00:08:06,627
Okay, you're right, I just...
freaked out.

183
00:08:06,727 --> 00:08:08,227
I don't know why.

184
00:08:08,427 --> 00:08:09,827
I'm sorry.

185
00:08:10,727 --> 00:08:12,627
Can we please just let it go?

186
00:08:13,927 --> 00:08:15,227
No.

187
00:08:17,227 --> 00:08:18,527
Hey, Stinson.

188
00:08:19,727 --> 00:08:21,927
Never lie to a man about
a chocolate fountain.

189
00:08:22,927 --> 00:08:24,827
So did you guys find
anything to eat?

190
00:08:24,927 --> 00:08:27,327
I had four strawberries.

191
00:08:27,427 --> 00:08:30,727
Was there a side of champagne
with each of the strawberries?

192
00:08:30,827 --> 00:08:32,227
Yes.

193
00:08:33,427 --> 00:08:37,127
Lily, you could have burped
or said the word "Yes,"

194
00:08:37,227 --> 00:08:40,727
but the fact that you did both
is exactly why I married you.

195
00:08:41,727 --> 00:08:43,927
Oh, look, more strawberries!

196
00:08:45,527 --> 00:08:47,127
So what happened next?

197
00:08:47,227 --> 00:08:49,427
- Ted, don't do this.
- No, seriously.

198
00:08:49,527 --> 00:08:51,227
Where do you see
yourself in five years?

199
00:08:51,327 --> 00:08:52,827
Where do you see yourself?

200
00:08:53,827 --> 00:08:56,127
Honestly, in five years...

201
00:08:56,427 --> 00:08:58,527
I probably want to be married.

202
00:08:58,627 --> 00:09:02,627
And I probably want
to be in Argentina.

203
00:09:02,727 --> 00:09:05,627
- Argentina?
- Or Tokyo, or Paris.

204
00:09:05,727 --> 00:09:08,427
Look, Ted, I don't know where
I'm going to be in five years.

205
00:09:08,527 --> 00:09:11,427
And I don't want to know.
I want my life to be an adventure.

206
00:09:13,227 --> 00:09:15,427
We have an expiration date,
don't we?

207
00:09:16,927 --> 00:09:18,227
Oh, my God.

208
00:09:18,527 --> 00:09:20,227
You guys broke up.

209
00:09:25,427 --> 00:09:27,927
You guys broke up.
I can't believe it.

210
00:09:28,027 --> 00:09:29,227
Barney...

211
00:09:29,527 --> 00:09:31,127
story's not over.

212
00:09:31,427 --> 00:09:34,027
Can we please not talk about this here.
Can we go home?

213
00:09:34,727 --> 00:09:35,927
Yeah, of course.

214
00:09:36,027 --> 00:09:37,927
Uh, excuse me, I'm sorry about this.
Can we actually...

215
00:09:38,027 --> 00:09:39,527
Oh, my God, it's you.

216
00:09:39,627 --> 00:09:41,027
Wha... what?

217
00:09:41,127 --> 00:09:45,027
You're the son of a bitch who
stole our blue French horn.

218
00:09:45,727 --> 00:09:46,727
Run!

219
00:09:47,027 --> 00:09:49,227
Run? Your strategy was run?

220
00:09:49,327 --> 00:09:50,627
It was a perfectly good idea.

221
00:09:50,727 --> 00:09:52,227
They didn't have our
credit card information.

222
00:09:52,327 --> 00:09:53,527
They didn't know us from Adam.

223
00:09:53,627 --> 00:09:54,627
I stand by it.

224
00:09:54,727 --> 00:09:55,327
Yeah?

225
00:09:55,427 --> 00:09:56,927
And how did that
work out for you?

226
00:10:00,227 --> 00:10:02,927
I don't see why they had to keep
my credit card and driver's license

227
00:10:02,927 --> 00:10:04,427
till we bring the horn back.

228
00:10:04,527 --> 00:10:06,427
Well, come on, Ted,
can you blame them?

229
00:10:06,527 --> 00:10:08,527
Look, I'm sorry about
the French horn.

230
00:10:08,627 --> 00:10:10,227
I want to make this right.

231
00:10:10,427 --> 00:10:13,627
So what we're going to do right now is,
we're going to run!

232
00:10:18,427 --> 00:10:20,627
So... Argentina.

233
00:10:20,727 --> 00:10:22,227
Argentina.

234
00:10:22,427 --> 00:10:24,627
Why is this the first
I've heard of Argentina?

235
00:10:24,727 --> 00:10:27,427
Mmm, American schools
suck at geography.

236
00:10:28,027 --> 00:10:31,127
What would be the point in telling
you that I want to live in Argentina?

237
00:10:31,227 --> 00:10:32,327
You don't want to live there.

238
00:10:32,327 --> 00:10:33,627
I could want to
live in Argentina.

239
00:10:33,627 --> 00:10:34,627
No, you couldn't.

240
00:10:34,727 --> 00:10:36,727
I mean,
you life is here and your career.

241
00:10:36,827 --> 00:10:38,927
I'm a journalist,
my career could take me anywhere,

242
00:10:39,027 --> 00:10:40,727
and I hope it does.

243
00:10:40,827 --> 00:10:43,027
Hey. I could be an
architect anywhere, too.

244
00:10:43,127 --> 00:10:44,927
They have buildings
in Argentina.

245
00:10:45,027 --> 00:10:47,427
And Paris. And even Tokyo.

246
00:10:47,527 --> 00:10:50,427
I don't know if you ever saw Godzilla, but
he wasn't knocking down a bunch of tents.

247
00:10:50,427 --> 00:10:53,527
So, what? You're saying you
want to move to Argentina?

248
00:10:53,927 --> 00:10:58,827
Well, I always regretted not taking
a year in college to live abroad.

249
00:10:58,927 --> 00:11:00,427
I just finished a
big project at work.

250
00:11:00,527 --> 00:11:02,727
I got some money saved up.

251
00:11:02,827 --> 00:11:06,027
If ever there were a time in my life to
do something like this, it's right now.

252
00:11:06,727 --> 00:11:08,627
Let's move to Argentina.

253
00:11:09,227 --> 00:11:10,627
Oh, shut up.

254
00:11:10,727 --> 00:11:12,827
You're scared
I might not be kidding.

255
00:11:13,927 --> 00:11:15,227
Aren't you?

256
00:11:15,327 --> 00:11:16,527
Nope.

257
00:11:19,627 --> 00:11:21,227
Your move, Scherbatsky.

258
00:11:24,227 --> 00:11:25,327
Okay.

259
00:11:26,127 --> 00:11:28,127
Let's do it—
let's move to Argentina.

260
00:11:30,327 --> 00:11:32,927
No es posible!

261
00:11:33,127 --> 00:11:35,327
Nobody moves to Argentina.

262
00:11:35,427 --> 00:11:38,527
The Argentinean peso has dropped
two-thirds in five years,

263
00:11:38,627 --> 00:11:40,827
the government is opposed
to free market reforms,

264
00:11:40,927 --> 00:11:45,227
and the railroad has been a mess since
the breakup of Ferrocarriles Argentinos.

265
00:11:45,927 --> 00:11:48,427
I hooked up with an
Argentinean exchange student

266
00:11:48,527 --> 00:11:50,227
in a Porta-John
outside Yankee Stadium.

267
00:11:50,327 --> 00:11:52,027
Man, she was chatty.

268
00:11:52,227 --> 00:11:53,627
Right? Right?

269
00:11:54,227 --> 00:11:56,127
You caught the bouquet?

270
00:11:57,227 --> 00:11:58,427
Barney.

271
00:11:59,027 --> 00:12:00,727
The story's not over yet.

272
00:12:01,527 --> 00:12:03,127
- Wait, wait, wait, wait.
- What?

273
00:12:04,227 --> 00:12:05,827
I don't know if I
can do this to you.

274
00:12:05,927 --> 00:12:06,627
Do what?

275
00:12:06,727 --> 00:12:08,627
Well, you say you want
to move to Argentina,

276
00:12:08,727 --> 00:12:11,227
but you want to have kids.

277
00:12:11,327 --> 00:12:13,527
Oh, right.
'Cause there are no kids there.

278
00:12:13,627 --> 00:12:16,927
On Santa's map of the world,
there's a big black "X" over Argentina.

279
00:12:17,027 --> 00:12:19,527
- You know what I mean.
- No, I don't.

280
00:12:19,627 --> 00:12:22,027
Okay, say we had kids.

281
00:12:22,127 --> 00:12:24,627
They wouldn't have to grow
up in some suburb somewhere.

282
00:12:24,727 --> 00:12:27,627
They would grow up on the road
having adventures with us.

283
00:12:27,727 --> 00:12:30,827
Think of all the Hard Rock Cafe
T-shirts they could collect.

284
00:12:31,427 --> 00:12:34,527
Ted, you know that kids were
never a part of my plan.

285
00:12:36,527 --> 00:12:39,427
But if I was going to
have someone's babies,

286
00:12:40,827 --> 00:12:42,327
I'd have your babies.

287
00:12:42,427 --> 00:12:43,827
That's when you run.

288
00:12:43,927 --> 00:12:45,527
Tell me you ran, Ted.

289
00:12:50,927 --> 00:12:53,627
Wait, wait, wait. We don't want to
start having babies right this second.

290
00:12:53,627 --> 00:12:54,627
Do you have a...?

291
00:12:54,727 --> 00:12:55,927
No, I don't.

292
00:12:56,027 --> 00:12:58,727
Well, we probably shouldn't.

293
00:12:59,227 --> 00:13:00,327
Yeah.

294
00:13:06,527 --> 00:13:08,027
- Risk it?
- Risk it.

295
00:13:24,927 --> 00:13:26,127
No.

296
00:13:28,951 --> 00:13:32,751
All right, ladies and gentlemen,
if you're all gather around,

297
00:13:32,851 --> 00:13:35,451
Lily and Marshall are
going to cut the cake.

298
00:13:35,551 --> 00:13:37,951
No. Robin, you're not...

299
00:13:38,051 --> 00:13:40,251
No, say the story's not over.

300
00:13:40,351 --> 00:13:41,451
Come on,
they're cutting the cake.

301
00:13:41,451 --> 00:13:42,951
Say the story's not over!

302
00:13:43,051 --> 00:13:47,751
Oh, God, this is the 12th most worried
I've ever been that someone's pregnant.

303
00:13:51,651 --> 00:13:52,851
Okay, Lily.

304
00:13:53,251 --> 00:13:56,651
I'm really hungry, so let's just,
uh, aim for my mouth, okay?

305
00:13:56,751 --> 00:13:59,151
Besides, the smearing the cake
thing's a cliché, remember?

306
00:13:59,251 --> 00:14:01,751
No, it's going to be so funny.

307
00:14:01,851 --> 00:14:03,151
Lily.

308
00:14:03,851 --> 00:14:06,651
Lily, just feed me the cake.

309
00:14:07,651 --> 00:14:10,751
Please, baby, I am so hungry.

310
00:14:15,451 --> 00:14:17,051
Whoopsy-daisy.

311
00:14:17,451 --> 00:14:19,151
And she's okay.

312
00:14:19,351 --> 00:14:21,251
- She's all right.
- That was funny.

313
00:14:21,351 --> 00:14:23,151
And it's time for
the honeymoon.

314
00:14:24,051 --> 00:14:26,951
Guys, guys, guys.
Thank you so much.

315
00:14:27,051 --> 00:14:28,251
We love you.

316
00:14:28,351 --> 00:14:29,351
I love you.

317
00:14:29,451 --> 00:14:32,151
Getting married, having kids.

318
00:14:32,251 --> 00:14:35,551
It's all a mistake.
It's a horrible, horrible mistake.

319
00:14:35,651 --> 00:14:37,751
God, this guy's
giving me nothing.

320
00:14:38,751 --> 00:14:40,451
All right,
have fun in Scotland.

321
00:14:40,551 --> 00:14:43,851
If you see the Loch Ness Monster,
tell him Ted Mosby says, "What's up?"

322
00:14:43,951 --> 00:14:46,051
Nessie's a she, Ted, come on.

323
00:15:01,251 --> 00:15:02,551
Hey, kiddo.

324
00:15:04,751 --> 00:15:08,351
You are going to miss out
on a lot of awesome stuff.

325
00:15:08,451 --> 00:15:10,351
You'll be at home with the kid

326
00:15:10,451 --> 00:15:13,251
while I am out awesome-ing
all over the place.

327
00:15:14,251 --> 00:15:16,051
And you're going to get fat.

328
00:15:17,751 --> 00:15:19,351
The story's not over, Barney.

329
00:15:19,451 --> 00:15:22,751
Okay, time to get the
horn back to the bistro.

330
00:15:23,151 --> 00:15:25,651
Oh, Ted, I don't know if I can go again.
That tuckered me out.

331
00:15:25,751 --> 00:15:27,151
Not a euphemism.

332
00:15:27,951 --> 00:15:32,551
Right. Okay, let me just go change,
and we'll leave.

333
00:15:32,651 --> 00:15:35,551
Whoa, whoa,
you get to change and I don't? Uh-uh.

334
00:15:35,651 --> 00:15:37,051
Solidarity, sister.

335
00:15:37,151 --> 00:15:40,351
That is crazy. I have a change of
clothes and you don't. Suck it up.

336
00:15:40,451 --> 00:15:43,051
Well, if we'd actually moved in
together, all my stuff would be here,

337
00:15:43,151 --> 00:15:44,951
but we didn't, so...

338
00:15:54,851 --> 00:15:55,751
Yeah.

339
00:15:56,751 --> 00:15:58,751
We were all talk, weren't we?

340
00:16:02,851 --> 00:16:04,751
We're not doing this, are we?

341
00:16:05,251 --> 00:16:07,651
I don't want to have
kids in Argentina.

342
00:16:07,751 --> 00:16:10,551
And I don't want to
have kids in Argentina.

343
00:16:14,351 --> 00:16:16,251
So where does that leave us?

344
00:16:18,551 --> 00:16:19,751
Well...

345
00:16:21,751 --> 00:16:24,551
we could stay together and...

346
00:16:24,951 --> 00:16:27,051
pretend this stuff
doesn't matter.

347
00:16:30,651 --> 00:16:31,851
Or...

348
00:16:33,251 --> 00:16:35,551
we could give back
the blue French horn.

349
00:16:40,251 --> 00:16:42,751
You stole a blue
French horn for me.

350
00:16:46,651 --> 00:16:49,651
I would have stolen
you a whole orchestra.

351
00:17:00,951 --> 00:17:02,351
You did break up.

352
00:17:02,951 --> 00:17:04,051
Yep.

353
00:17:04,351 --> 00:17:05,451
You're not pregnant?

354
00:17:05,651 --> 00:17:06,751
Nope.

355
00:17:07,051 --> 00:17:09,451
An-And Marshall and
Lily don't know?

356
00:17:09,651 --> 00:17:12,651
Well, afterwards, uh,
we came by to tell you guys,

357
00:17:12,751 --> 00:17:14,551
but Lily was pretty
stressed out, so...

358
00:17:14,651 --> 00:17:17,151
We decided not to say anything
till after the wedding.

359
00:17:21,151 --> 00:17:22,551
You guys okay?

360
00:17:23,251 --> 00:17:26,851
Well, it hasn't been the easiest
two weeks of our lives, but...

361
00:17:27,551 --> 00:17:28,951
But we're okay.

362
00:17:30,751 --> 00:17:32,451
The open bar helps.

363
00:17:32,951 --> 00:17:34,551
- Excuse me, Miss.
- Hi.

364
00:17:34,651 --> 00:17:36,451
Could I have this dance?

365
00:17:38,251 --> 00:17:40,651
Well, we knew this day
would come eventually.

366
00:17:40,751 --> 00:17:42,451
Take care of her, little man.

367
00:17:55,970 --> 00:18:00,570
This is by far the drunkest
I've ever seen you.

368
00:18:02,770 --> 00:18:04,270
Uh, driver.

369
00:18:06,973 --> 00:18:08,673
Hello!

370
00:18:08,590 --> 00:18:09,790
Ranjit.

371
00:18:10,830 --> 00:18:13,630
Hey, can we make a stop before
we head back to the hotel?

372
00:18:13,730 --> 00:18:15,830
You do not have to stop.

373
00:18:15,930 --> 00:18:20,630
You can be together as man
and wife right back there,

374
00:18:20,730 --> 00:18:22,730
and because we are friends...

375
00:18:23,030 --> 00:18:25,030
I will not watch.

376
00:18:26,830 --> 00:18:30,730
Um, no,
we actually had something else in mind.

377
00:18:32,630 --> 00:18:33,630
Okay.

378
00:18:35,030 --> 00:18:36,430
Lily, go sit down.

379
00:18:37,130 --> 00:18:38,630
Welcome to Wienerburger.

380
00:18:38,730 --> 00:18:39,630
Hi.

381
00:18:39,730 --> 00:18:43,330
Can we get a number one,
please, with no pickles?

382
00:18:43,430 --> 00:18:46,830
And a number four
with no onions.

383
00:18:46,930 --> 00:18:49,430
Let me guess.
Jefferson High prom?

384
00:18:49,530 --> 00:18:50,730
No.

385
00:18:51,530 --> 00:18:53,030
But thank you.

386
00:18:53,430 --> 00:18:54,830
Actually, we just got married.

387
00:18:54,930 --> 00:18:58,030
- Wow. Congratulations.
- Thank you.

388
00:18:58,130 --> 00:19:00,030
That's $7.80.

389
00:19:01,630 --> 00:19:03,330
- Hey, dude.
- Yeah.

390
00:19:03,430 --> 00:19:07,230
I don't know how to say this, but
your wife just threw up in the trash.

391
00:19:11,630 --> 00:19:13,130
My wife.

392
00:19:15,630 --> 00:19:17,830
So Marshall and
Lily were married,

393
00:19:17,930 --> 00:19:19,930
and Robin and I were broken up.

394
00:19:20,030 --> 00:19:21,730
And as hard as it
was at the time,

395
00:19:21,830 --> 00:19:23,730
in the end we both
got what we wanted.

396
00:19:23,830 --> 00:19:26,630
She did eventually go
on to live in Argentina

397
00:19:26,730 --> 00:19:29,330
and Morocco and Greece, Russia,

398
00:19:29,430 --> 00:19:31,230
even Japan for a little while.

399
00:19:31,430 --> 00:19:34,930
And I... well, I met your mom.

400
00:19:35,130 --> 00:19:37,630
I think for the most part if
you're really honest with yourself

401
00:19:37,730 --> 00:19:39,330
about what you
want out of life,

402
00:19:39,430 --> 00:19:41,030
life gives it to you.

403
00:19:43,430 --> 00:19:47,230
Of course, at that moment, all I
really wanted was a scotch and soda

404
00:19:47,330 --> 00:19:48,830
and a cigar.

405
00:20:05,386 --> 00:20:07,486
I'm really sorry
about you and Robin.

406
00:20:08,586 --> 00:20:11,286
I know I was always joking around
about wanting you two to break up,

407
00:20:11,286 --> 00:20:14,086
but you were really
good together.

408
00:20:14,686 --> 00:20:15,886
Yeah...

409
00:20:16,686 --> 00:20:17,986
we were.

410
00:20:19,086 --> 00:20:21,486
She just wasn't the one,
you know?

411
00:20:21,586 --> 00:20:24,586
The one. Oh, Ted, no.

412
00:20:24,686 --> 00:20:28,386
Do not tell me you're going to
start searching for "the one" again.

413
00:20:28,486 --> 00:20:30,486
The only time I want to
hear you saying "the one"

414
00:20:30,586 --> 00:20:33,386
is if it's followed by the
word "hundredth." What up?

415
00:20:33,486 --> 00:20:35,986
No, I need a break
from all that, I...

416
00:20:36,086 --> 00:20:39,586
I just want to get out there and
have fun for a while, you know?

417
00:20:39,686 --> 00:20:40,886
Really?

418
00:20:41,486 --> 00:20:42,886
'Cause...

419
00:20:43,586 --> 00:20:46,086
you know, you've been in
a relationship for a year.

420
00:20:46,186 --> 00:20:49,386
You're going to...
be a little rusty.

421
00:20:50,986 --> 00:20:53,186
- Yeah.
- I'm just saying...

422
00:20:54,486 --> 00:20:57,086
you're gonna need, need,
need some help out there.

423
00:20:57,486 --> 00:20:59,086
Could be.

424
00:21:00,886 --> 00:21:02,186
Ted?

425
00:21:02,486 --> 00:21:03,986
Yes, Barney.

426
00:21:05,386 --> 00:21:06,886
Do you think...

427
00:21:10,586 --> 00:21:12,486
Do you think maybe you might...

428
00:21:12,986 --> 00:21:14,886
need a wingman again?

429
00:21:19,586 --> 00:21:20,586
I do.

430
00:21:22,286 --> 00:21:23,786
Yes!

431
00:21:24,086 --> 00:21:26,386
Yes! We're back.

432
00:21:26,486 --> 00:21:28,186
We are back.

433
00:21:28,286 --> 00:21:31,686
And Ted, my boy,
it's going to be legend...

434
00:21:31,786 --> 00:21:32,986
Wait for it.

435
00:21:33,386 --> 00:21:34,986
Subtitles : Willow's Team
Transcript : Raceman
www.forom.com