1 00:00:02,717 --> 00:00:03,418 Hey. 2 00:00:03,419 --> 00:00:04,965 Hey, guys, how's it going? 3 00:00:05,362 --> 00:00:06,998 I'm just gonna finish this. 4 00:00:09,196 --> 00:00:11,279 We just had dinner with Stella's sister and her fiancé. 5 00:00:11,379 --> 00:00:12,561 They're getting married before us. 6 00:00:12,699 --> 00:00:14,870 Okay, you know how you've dreamt about your perfect wedding day 7 00:00:14,973 --> 00:00:15,935 ever since you were a little girl? 8 00:00:16,084 --> 00:00:16,954 - Yeah. - Totally. 9 00:00:17,652 --> 00:00:19,770 My sister is stealing my dream wedding. 10 00:00:19,987 --> 00:00:23,738 Down to every last detail... on Shelter Island, at Sunset, 11 00:00:23,910 --> 00:00:27,664 just down the beach from my family's old summer house. 12 00:00:28,145 --> 00:00:30,011 It's my dream wedding. 13 00:00:30,368 --> 00:00:31,696 I'm gonna finish this. 14 00:00:34,683 --> 00:00:36,263 The lamb here is supposed to be great. 15 00:00:36,950 --> 00:00:37,946 I'm a vegan. 16 00:00:38,083 --> 00:00:41,124 I wish I could tune out that moral voice inside me that says 17 00:00:41,224 --> 00:00:42,956 eating animals is murder, 18 00:00:43,265 --> 00:00:46,550 but I guess I'm just not as strong as you are. 19 00:00:46,650 --> 00:00:48,345 That's 'cause you need protein. 20 00:00:49,787 --> 00:00:51,035 I'll have the lamb. 21 00:00:53,427 --> 00:00:54,984 Okay, new goal: 22 00:00:55,167 --> 00:00:56,301 I want our wedding 23 00:00:56,401 --> 00:00:57,724 to kick her wedding's ass. 24 00:00:57,884 --> 00:00:58,915 I want our wedding 25 00:00:59,015 --> 00:01:01,067 to take her wedding's head and shove it in the toilet 26 00:01:01,167 --> 00:01:02,834 and flush it, like, 20 times. 27 00:01:03,551 --> 00:01:06,811 Ted, in high school, you were her wedding, weren't you? 28 00:01:07,855 --> 00:01:09,708 You know, she's always trying to one-up me. 29 00:01:09,884 --> 00:01:10,998 I mean, I love her, but... 30 00:01:11,130 --> 00:01:11,928 there's a little part of me 31 00:01:12,028 --> 00:01:14,157 that kinda wishes this whole thing would just fall apart. 32 00:01:14,462 --> 00:01:17,078 I hate him. I hate him. I hate him! 33 00:01:17,336 --> 00:01:18,767 God, this steak is so good! 34 00:01:18,931 --> 00:01:20,347 Four days to go and he just runs off 35 00:01:20,405 --> 00:01:22,341 with the vitamin consultant from Whole Foods? 36 00:01:22,552 --> 00:01:23,960 I gave up makeup for him. 37 00:01:24,101 --> 00:01:25,672 I gave up showering for him. 38 00:01:25,801 --> 00:01:27,596 I gave up shaving my armpits for him. 39 00:01:27,772 --> 00:01:29,658 Hard to imagine where it all went wrong. 40 00:01:30,502 --> 00:01:32,215 And now it's so close to the wedding. There's like... 41 00:01:32,344 --> 00:01:34,221 bacon or something in this dipping sauce. I love it. 42 00:01:34,338 --> 00:01:37,365 I can't get any refunds. I'm gonna be out thousands of dollars. 43 00:01:37,599 --> 00:01:39,378 Kids, when you're in a relationship, 44 00:01:39,508 --> 00:01:41,983 you develop a kind of telepathy with your partner. 45 00:01:42,522 --> 00:01:43,590 What do you think? 46 00:01:43,953 --> 00:01:45,185 We could help her out. 47 00:01:45,607 --> 00:01:46,534 No, Stella, 48 00:01:47,191 --> 00:01:48,891 we should help her out. 49 00:01:49,994 --> 00:01:51,270 Let's pay for dinner. 50 00:01:52,795 --> 00:01:53,522 Nora. 51 00:01:54,061 --> 00:01:55,012 Don't worry. 52 00:01:55,891 --> 00:01:56,841 We got this. 53 00:01:57,275 --> 00:01:58,013 That's right. 54 00:01:58,283 --> 00:01:59,104 We'll take over your wedding, 55 00:01:59,209 --> 00:02:01,110 pay you back for everything you spent. 56 00:02:01,438 --> 00:02:03,373 Ted and I will get married this Sunday. 57 00:02:06,545 --> 00:02:09,045 Sync by vNaru 58 00:02:10,060 --> 00:02:16,134 Someone needs to stop Clearway Law. Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers. 59 00:02:23,871 --> 00:02:26,041 We're getting married this Sunday? 60 00:02:26,369 --> 00:02:27,877 Are we sure we're ready for this? 61 00:02:28,053 --> 00:02:30,704 Ted, I wasted years trying to get Lucy's dad 62 00:02:30,786 --> 00:02:32,851 to decide he was "ready" for this, 63 00:02:33,156 --> 00:02:36,393 but he never got ready for this. That's why we never got married. 64 00:02:36,593 --> 00:02:38,595 Come on, let's just be spontaneous. 65 00:02:38,841 --> 00:02:42,137 I used to dream that Tony would be spontaneous like this. 66 00:02:42,606 --> 00:02:44,202 Okay, I'm in. 67 00:02:44,483 --> 00:02:45,469 And I'm also... 68 00:02:45,598 --> 00:02:46,841 spontaneous. 69 00:02:51,214 --> 00:02:52,751 I wish I hadn't done that. 70 00:02:54,346 --> 00:02:57,091 Kids, morals usually come at the end of stories, 71 00:02:57,185 --> 00:02:59,762 but this one is so important, I'm gonna tell you now: 72 00:02:59,938 --> 00:03:02,882 Don't ever, ever, invite an ex to your wedding. 73 00:03:03,129 --> 00:03:04,595 If someone had given me that advice, 74 00:03:04,724 --> 00:03:06,401 well, it would have changed everything. 75 00:03:06,530 --> 00:03:08,786 Come on, you've got to come, it's my wedding. 76 00:03:08,885 --> 00:03:10,985 I can't. I'm in Tokyo. 77 00:03:11,243 --> 00:03:14,023 It's my first week on the job. I can't just take off. 78 00:03:14,527 --> 00:03:17,960 Plus, I'm finally doing serious news. 79 00:03:19,321 --> 00:03:21,069 Robin was doing serious news. 80 00:03:21,456 --> 00:03:23,779 It was the number one English news network in Japan. 81 00:03:23,896 --> 00:03:25,845 Of course, the news was a little different over there. 82 00:03:26,246 --> 00:03:28,046 Giant Fan! 83 00:03:29,779 --> 00:03:32,583 The Federal Reserve Board voted to leave interest... 84 00:03:33,723 --> 00:03:34,978 rates unchanged. 85 00:03:35,577 --> 00:03:37,653 It's my wedding. You have to be there. 86 00:03:38,216 --> 00:03:39,424 Okay. I'll be there. 87 00:03:39,870 --> 00:03:40,703 I gotta go. 88 00:03:42,591 --> 00:03:43,577 Good evening. 89 00:03:46,159 --> 00:03:48,024 And I'm Robin Scherbatsky. 90 00:03:48,986 --> 00:03:51,602 Peace talks were stalled once again in the Middle East. 91 00:03:51,766 --> 00:03:55,051 Despite a promising start in the latest negotiations, 92 00:03:55,496 --> 00:03:58,295 talks foundered on security issues. 93 00:03:58,766 --> 00:04:00,584 - She's in. - Yes! 94 00:04:00,748 --> 00:04:02,825 All right, Ted, your bachelor party, tonight. 95 00:04:02,930 --> 00:04:06,287 I have got three of the most physically and morally flexible 96 00:04:06,481 --> 00:04:07,986 exotic dancers you've ever seen... 97 00:04:08,037 --> 00:04:08,737 Can't, there's no time. 98 00:04:08,819 --> 00:04:10,071 Okay, I'll let you know how it goes. 99 00:04:10,165 --> 00:04:12,288 Marshall, we should really rent the cars for tomorrow? 100 00:04:12,358 --> 00:04:13,156 Sure. 101 00:04:17,156 --> 00:04:17,859 What? 102 00:04:18,164 --> 00:04:20,358 No "Don't get married, Ted"? 103 00:04:20,487 --> 00:04:23,056 No "You're making a big mistake, Ted"? 104 00:04:23,220 --> 00:04:24,886 Barney Stinson... 105 00:04:24,980 --> 00:04:28,605 are you no longer committed to the war on marriage? 106 00:04:28,745 --> 00:04:31,557 No, I just know a hopeless cause when I see it. 107 00:04:31,873 --> 00:04:33,828 It's the same reason I don't recycle. 108 00:04:34,137 --> 00:04:38,349 Plus, Ted getting married is in my best interest. 109 00:04:38,607 --> 00:04:39,502 You see... 110 00:04:39,713 --> 00:04:43,408 Lately I've been working on a problem of the utmost importance. 111 00:04:44,886 --> 00:04:46,575 I confess I was stumped. 112 00:04:46,716 --> 00:04:50,030 Until one night I decided to tackle it once and for all. 113 00:04:50,130 --> 00:04:52,357 WITH ROBIN AGAIN? 114 00:05:03,945 --> 00:05:06,097 Then, at last... 115 00:05:06,197 --> 00:05:08,391 I cracked the code. 116 00:05:09,068 --> 00:05:12,003 AT TED'S WEDDING 117 00:05:14,525 --> 00:05:16,542 - So you're back on Robin. - Hopefully. 118 00:05:17,514 --> 00:05:18,676 I mean, this weekend 119 00:05:18,776 --> 00:05:20,930 is the best chance ever to hook up with her again. 120 00:05:21,344 --> 00:05:22,464 You'll never pull it off. 121 00:05:22,473 --> 00:05:24,162 There's too many distractions. 122 00:05:24,268 --> 00:05:26,414 The first drunk bridesmaid you see, 123 00:05:26,485 --> 00:05:29,722 you'll have your head under her dress like an old-time photographer. 124 00:05:30,238 --> 00:05:32,414 Lily, don't cheapen this. 125 00:05:32,630 --> 00:05:34,284 I don't want to sound all... 126 00:05:34,390 --> 00:05:36,314 mushy-gushy and romantic, 127 00:05:36,607 --> 00:05:39,528 but this weekend, Robin is the only woman I'm banging. 128 00:05:41,156 --> 00:05:42,927 And so, the day before our wedding, 129 00:05:43,056 --> 00:05:45,942 Stella and I made the trip up to Shelter Island. 130 00:05:46,306 --> 00:05:48,417 With everyone else not far behind. 131 00:05:48,957 --> 00:05:50,951 - Zitch dog. - Z-Z-Z... Zog... 132 00:05:53,226 --> 00:05:56,393 This isn't exactly where I pictured Ted getting married. 133 00:05:56,522 --> 00:05:59,502 "The Namaste Yoga and Meditation Collective." 134 00:05:59,584 --> 00:06:00,289 I don't know about you guys, 135 00:06:00,347 --> 00:06:02,494 but Nama-stay here any longer than I have to. 136 00:06:04,605 --> 00:06:06,846 Sweetie, go check in with that dirty hippie 137 00:06:06,904 --> 00:06:08,711 over there and we'll get some drinks. 138 00:06:11,329 --> 00:06:14,027 So, what scotches you got? 139 00:06:14,390 --> 00:06:17,628 Here at the center, we have a very strict no-alcohol policy. 140 00:06:19,775 --> 00:06:21,775 Great, and all the meals are included, right? 141 00:06:22,682 --> 00:06:24,582 And they're all 100% vegan. 142 00:06:27,022 --> 00:06:28,652 I need alcohol. 143 00:06:28,793 --> 00:06:31,466 I'm not gonna get Robin with this stuff. 144 00:06:31,792 --> 00:06:32,696 Look at this. 145 00:06:32,954 --> 00:06:36,614 Berry Blaster Brain Revitalizer. 146 00:06:36,731 --> 00:06:39,367 My God, some of these drinks could actually make a girl smarter. 147 00:06:39,449 --> 00:06:41,021 What sort of hell has Ted brought us to? 148 00:06:41,490 --> 00:06:44,786 - There's no meat. - There's no alcohol. 149 00:06:45,115 --> 00:06:46,076 It gets worse: 150 00:06:46,335 --> 00:06:48,302 I'm 90% sure that guy you were talking with used 151 00:06:48,419 --> 00:06:50,320 to be lead singer of the Spin Doctors. 152 00:06:52,760 --> 00:06:53,991 Hey, guys, 153 00:06:54,836 --> 00:06:56,431 Stella and I have a little problem. 154 00:06:57,017 --> 00:06:58,977 The programs look great. 155 00:06:59,129 --> 00:07:01,311 I mean, it's not our names on the front, but otherwise, 156 00:07:01,440 --> 00:07:02,519 really nice. 157 00:07:03,246 --> 00:07:04,373 Hey, I talked to Robin. 158 00:07:04,478 --> 00:07:05,616 She's running a little bit late, 159 00:07:05,698 --> 00:07:07,305 but she'll be here just under the wire. 160 00:07:07,845 --> 00:07:09,093 You invited Robin? 161 00:07:09,234 --> 00:07:10,254 Yeah, of course. 162 00:07:10,712 --> 00:07:12,002 You never told me that. 163 00:07:12,295 --> 00:07:14,383 I'm not sure how I feel about that. 164 00:07:14,946 --> 00:07:15,920 Can I help? 165 00:07:16,342 --> 00:07:17,574 You feel glad. 166 00:07:19,064 --> 00:07:20,167 You like Robin. 167 00:07:20,284 --> 00:07:22,701 Yeah, but, she's your ex-girlfriend. 168 00:07:22,888 --> 00:07:24,015 - It's weird. - It's not weird. 169 00:07:24,144 --> 00:07:25,199 It is weird. 170 00:07:25,434 --> 00:07:26,701 You don't get what's like for a bride 171 00:07:26,783 --> 00:07:28,331 to see her groom's ex at their wedding. 172 00:07:29,466 --> 00:07:30,674 Stella. 173 00:07:31,917 --> 00:07:33,865 Your new husband used to nail me, like, 174 00:07:33,923 --> 00:07:35,589 three times a day. 175 00:07:38,263 --> 00:07:39,833 Having exes around, 176 00:07:40,432 --> 00:07:42,320 I don't know, it brings up... 177 00:07:42,613 --> 00:07:44,173 unresolved things. 178 00:07:44,877 --> 00:07:46,379 How do you know that spark won't come back 179 00:07:46,437 --> 00:07:47,657 with your ex sitting out there? 180 00:07:47,868 --> 00:07:49,171 Come on, we're just friends. 181 00:07:49,264 --> 00:07:51,279 Plus, Robin and I already had our backslide... 182 00:07:51,350 --> 00:07:53,356 last Thanksgiving, not even that long ago. 183 00:07:53,895 --> 00:07:56,605 Did you place a large bet against yourself in this argument? 184 00:07:56,969 --> 00:07:58,517 She already got her ticket. 185 00:07:58,693 --> 00:08:00,793 Ted, it's important to me. 186 00:08:00,970 --> 00:08:02,859 I would never invite Lucy's dad. 187 00:08:02,976 --> 00:08:05,744 I wouldn't care if you did. Tony's great. Let's invite him, too. 188 00:08:05,826 --> 00:08:09,322 No, Tony is the last person I want at our wedding, okay? 189 00:08:10,930 --> 00:08:14,015 And Robin is a close second. 190 00:08:15,563 --> 00:08:17,464 Robin's probably about to get on the plane. 191 00:08:17,616 --> 00:08:19,962 Plus, she left a really important job for this. 192 00:08:20,091 --> 00:08:25,039 Spurred by environmental concerns and high gasoline prices, 193 00:08:25,133 --> 00:08:30,013 sales of hybrid vehicles have risen 11% over the previous year. 194 00:08:30,177 --> 00:08:31,297 What should I do? 195 00:08:31,954 --> 00:08:32,752 I don't know. 196 00:08:32,998 --> 00:08:34,746 I kinda get the no exes thing. 197 00:08:34,886 --> 00:08:37,656 Why ask a filed romance to come and watch your successful one? 198 00:08:37,733 --> 00:08:40,560 It's like inviting the Seattle Mariners to a World Series game. 199 00:08:40,642 --> 00:08:41,839 It's weird for everyone. 200 00:08:42,554 --> 00:08:44,865 What? No. Robin has to come. 201 00:08:44,947 --> 00:08:46,585 Right, she's like, my best friend. 202 00:08:47,793 --> 00:08:49,412 Female friend. My best female friend. 203 00:08:49,530 --> 00:08:52,040 Hey! Whoa! I don't care, why fake it. 204 00:08:53,389 --> 00:08:55,230 Dude, Robin has to be here. 205 00:08:55,313 --> 00:08:56,414 She shouldn't come. 206 00:08:56,480 --> 00:08:58,087 - What are you talk... - Justice Aldrin, 207 00:08:58,192 --> 00:08:59,588 tie-breaking vote. 208 00:09:01,148 --> 00:09:03,538 Okay, wouldn't feel right without Robin. 209 00:09:03,741 --> 00:09:06,305 But you don't mess with the bride. 210 00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:08,171 I'm gonna tell her not to come. 211 00:09:08,887 --> 00:09:10,541 - No, Ted. - It's the right decision, Ted. 212 00:09:10,728 --> 00:09:12,388 This is gonna be, like, the worst 213 00:09:12,488 --> 00:09:13,708 phone conversation of all time. 214 00:09:13,808 --> 00:09:14,960 Ted, Ted, Ted. 215 00:09:15,465 --> 00:09:17,236 Co-best man... I'm on it. 216 00:09:22,743 --> 00:09:23,541 Hello? 217 00:09:23,647 --> 00:09:24,685 Robin, where are you? 218 00:09:24,943 --> 00:09:26,527 Just heading to the airport. 219 00:09:27,325 --> 00:09:29,823 Okay, well, see you soon. Have a great flight. 220 00:09:32,228 --> 00:09:34,551 Bad news. I couldn't reach her. 221 00:09:34,668 --> 00:09:36,424 Robin's already in on her way. 222 00:09:41,946 --> 00:09:43,658 Okay, Robin's on her way. 223 00:09:43,817 --> 00:09:45,166 You know what, I'm glad. 224 00:09:45,342 --> 00:09:47,465 Exes should be allowed to come to weddings. 225 00:09:47,570 --> 00:09:49,609 I'll just tell Stella she's got to deal with it. 226 00:09:49,750 --> 00:09:51,451 I think you need to be more delicate 227 00:09:51,545 --> 00:09:53,246 with Stella about this whole Robin thing. 228 00:09:53,328 --> 00:09:54,536 What do you mean by delicate? 229 00:09:54,642 --> 00:09:57,375 Brides are under a lot of stress before a wedding. 230 00:09:57,562 --> 00:10:00,174 I mean, of course, I held it together pretty well. 231 00:10:02,896 --> 00:10:04,022 You don't remember? 232 00:10:06,004 --> 00:10:07,623 The florist just told me 233 00:10:07,752 --> 00:10:11,186 the roses are more light medium-pink than medium-pink. 234 00:10:11,350 --> 00:10:13,027 Light medium-pink! 235 00:10:13,145 --> 00:10:15,209 Everything's ruined. 236 00:10:16,711 --> 00:10:19,347 Our wedding site uses a gravity furnace 237 00:10:19,452 --> 00:10:21,329 instead of forced-air heating. 238 00:10:21,388 --> 00:10:23,253 That's the one thing I cared about. 239 00:10:23,347 --> 00:10:26,139 Why are we even getting married? 240 00:10:28,225 --> 00:10:33,292 Blobbity-blah. Wickity-wah. Eeky, eeky, eeky, eeky whee! 241 00:10:35,474 --> 00:10:37,538 After a while, it's all noise. 242 00:10:38,545 --> 00:10:39,648 Poor Stella's had to jam 243 00:10:39,718 --> 00:10:41,959 months of crazy into just three days. 244 00:10:42,146 --> 00:10:43,026 So what do I do? 245 00:10:43,190 --> 00:10:45,055 You wait for the next crisis, 246 00:10:45,149 --> 00:10:46,932 you solve it, you're a hero. 247 00:10:47,132 --> 00:10:48,536 Then you bring up the Robin thing, 248 00:10:48,630 --> 00:10:50,190 but this time, she'll say yes. 249 00:10:50,284 --> 00:10:52,184 Yeah, but what if there's no next crisis? 250 00:10:53,381 --> 00:10:56,970 She's a bride. There will be a next crisis. 251 00:10:57,071 --> 00:10:58,971 Like four minutes later 252 00:10:59,329 --> 00:11:02,590 - There's an next crisis. - Awesome! What is it? 253 00:11:02,683 --> 00:11:05,886 My daughter, my own daughter isn't coming to our wedding. 254 00:11:06,026 --> 00:11:06,919 What? 255 00:11:07,587 --> 00:11:08,944 Tony's supposed to drive her up tomorrow, 256 00:11:09,038 --> 00:11:10,669 but now he's being all petty about me getting married, 257 00:11:10,739 --> 00:11:11,666 and he won't do it. 258 00:11:12,182 --> 00:11:13,085 It's been five years. 259 00:11:13,191 --> 00:11:14,880 Why can't we just move on already? 260 00:11:15,525 --> 00:11:17,457 So first thing tomorrow I drive down, 261 00:11:17,539 --> 00:11:19,850 talk to him, get him to let me drive Lucy up, 262 00:11:19,920 --> 00:11:22,032 than, boom, crisis solved. 263 00:11:22,114 --> 00:11:24,378 Stella's happy. Robin comes to the wedding. 264 00:11:25,715 --> 00:11:26,430 Hey. 265 00:11:26,700 --> 00:11:27,509 You Barney? 266 00:11:27,814 --> 00:11:28,530 Yes. 267 00:11:28,729 --> 00:11:31,204 I hear you're a real man whore, so listen up. 268 00:11:31,450 --> 00:11:34,817 Tomorrow night I want to do things so dirty and so depraved 269 00:11:34,887 --> 00:11:37,022 that I forget that this was supposed to be my wedding. 270 00:11:37,943 --> 00:11:40,629 I... I'm kind of here with someone. 271 00:11:40,746 --> 00:11:41,661 Bring her. 272 00:11:42,518 --> 00:11:44,230 You're never going to make it. 273 00:11:45,966 --> 00:11:48,627 So, the morning of my wedding day I made the trip back 274 00:11:48,848 --> 00:11:49,927 to Tony's house 275 00:11:50,045 --> 00:11:51,194 to get Lucy. 276 00:11:53,939 --> 00:11:56,223 - Hey... - Tony... 277 00:11:56,481 --> 00:11:58,557 Doing a little karate? 278 00:12:01,079 --> 00:12:03,015 Sorry, sorry, man. You just... 279 00:12:03,109 --> 00:12:04,622 set off my internal defense alarm. 280 00:12:04,943 --> 00:12:07,383 You got to watch these things. Stay alert, stay alive. 281 00:12:07,536 --> 00:12:09,635 - Right. - So what brings you here? 282 00:12:09,753 --> 00:12:11,383 I thought you'd be off in some honeymoon suite 283 00:12:11,483 --> 00:12:12,943 with my woman right now. 284 00:12:13,060 --> 00:12:14,421 Not yet. Soon. 285 00:12:14,515 --> 00:12:16,087 That's right, tonight's the night. 286 00:12:16,169 --> 00:12:19,395 Yeah! Oh, man, you are going to be sticking it 287 00:12:19,501 --> 00:12:20,967 to the mother of my child. 288 00:12:21,342 --> 00:12:23,677 Actually, I' already stuck it to her plenty of times. 289 00:12:23,806 --> 00:12:25,531 Why do I always have to correct people? 290 00:12:25,671 --> 00:12:27,347 You and Stella. 291 00:12:27,898 --> 00:12:30,503 You lucky dog. I could just... 292 00:12:33,834 --> 00:12:35,417 I'm so happy for you guys. 293 00:12:37,001 --> 00:12:39,286 Yeah... listen, here's the thing... 294 00:12:39,814 --> 00:12:40,905 - Lucy... - You can't take her. 295 00:12:41,339 --> 00:12:43,098 Tony, stop. Look... 296 00:12:43,626 --> 00:12:45,069 this is a big day for Lucy, too. 297 00:12:45,620 --> 00:12:47,309 You're going to have to put aside your own issues 298 00:12:47,391 --> 00:12:49,372 and think about what's best for her here. 299 00:12:49,641 --> 00:12:50,404 Whether you like it or not, 300 00:12:50,504 --> 00:12:52,269 she really should be at her mother's wedding. So, 301 00:12:52,879 --> 00:12:54,322 I'm taking Lucy with me. 302 00:12:58,824 --> 00:13:00,267 You're right, man. 303 00:13:00,689 --> 00:13:01,674 You're right. 304 00:13:02,531 --> 00:13:04,982 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It's just... 305 00:13:05,158 --> 00:13:06,625 seeing you guys... 306 00:13:07,688 --> 00:13:09,952 has made me realize everything I had. 307 00:13:10,761 --> 00:13:13,928 Hey, hey... let's stop hugging. 308 00:13:14,843 --> 00:13:15,829 I'm sorry. 309 00:13:17,002 --> 00:13:18,984 Lucy means the world to me. 310 00:13:19,321 --> 00:13:21,491 And I feel like I'm losing her to this new family... 311 00:13:21,585 --> 00:13:22,899 a family I'm not even a part of. 312 00:13:22,981 --> 00:13:23,931 Come on, sure you are. 313 00:13:24,013 --> 00:13:26,125 No, I'm not. I wasn't even invited to the wedding. 314 00:13:26,242 --> 00:13:27,673 Well, you are now. 315 00:13:31,998 --> 00:13:33,535 Road trip. 316 00:13:34,344 --> 00:13:35,259 Right? 317 00:13:38,953 --> 00:13:41,182 Road Trip 2... Back in the Car. 318 00:13:43,528 --> 00:13:45,827 So, today's the day. 319 00:13:46,062 --> 00:13:47,200 You hydrating? 320 00:13:48,009 --> 00:13:50,872 Dear femal, thank you for your interest in Barney Stinson... 321 00:13:50,952 --> 00:13:53,333 Your back is going to look like a Jackson Pollock. 322 00:13:54,354 --> 00:13:56,969 I regret to inform you that at this time... 323 00:13:57,251 --> 00:13:58,670 I was a vegan for two years. 324 00:13:59,260 --> 00:14:00,667 I need meat. 325 00:14:01,019 --> 00:14:03,553 There are currently no positions available. 326 00:14:03,717 --> 00:14:05,078 I'm a yoga instructor. 327 00:14:05,266 --> 00:14:07,072 Every position is available. 328 00:14:08,315 --> 00:14:10,000 Your room, 20 minutes. 329 00:14:10,153 --> 00:14:11,126 No foreplay. 330 00:14:13,578 --> 00:14:14,939 I'm not going to make it, am I? 331 00:14:15,255 --> 00:14:16,569 Not a chance. 332 00:14:21,197 --> 00:14:22,288 Okay, just remember, 333 00:14:22,405 --> 00:14:23,989 Let me talk to Stella first, okay? 334 00:14:24,083 --> 00:14:25,596 Mommy! Mommy! 335 00:14:25,877 --> 00:14:27,602 Ted invited daddy! 336 00:14:28,059 --> 00:14:30,429 Hi, sweetie. I missed you. 337 00:14:30,710 --> 00:14:32,358 Give me just a sec, okay? 338 00:14:33,238 --> 00:14:34,739 - Hey. - Hey, Tony. 339 00:14:35,877 --> 00:14:37,519 - Hey. - You invited Tony? 340 00:14:37,601 --> 00:14:38,763 To our wedding? 341 00:14:38,950 --> 00:14:42,032 Ted, we talked about this. No exes at our wedding. 342 00:14:42,214 --> 00:14:43,470 Why would you do this? 343 00:14:43,965 --> 00:14:47,308 Oh boy! What did Ted do this time? 344 00:14:53,173 --> 00:14:54,568 Ted, what is Robin doing here? 345 00:14:54,615 --> 00:14:56,011 I thought I made myself clear. 346 00:14:56,129 --> 00:14:57,970 No exes at our wedding. 347 00:14:58,651 --> 00:14:59,815 To be fair... 348 00:15:00,496 --> 00:15:01,340 your ex is here. 349 00:15:01,575 --> 00:15:02,642 You invited him! 350 00:15:02,748 --> 00:15:05,516 - Come on, it's not weird. - It is weird. 351 00:15:05,751 --> 00:15:08,202 It's like things are not finished between you two. 352 00:15:08,613 --> 00:15:09,598 And Tony... 353 00:15:10,278 --> 00:15:11,251 I can't talk with Tony right now. 354 00:15:11,310 --> 00:15:13,210 Can you please go out there and tell him to leave? 355 00:15:13,269 --> 00:15:14,982 You can make me the bad guy. 356 00:15:15,439 --> 00:15:18,372 I'll go talk to Robin, so she knows it's nothing personal. 357 00:15:20,847 --> 00:15:23,784 And kids, if I had just let Stella talk to Robin, 358 00:15:23,890 --> 00:15:25,708 this whole story might have ended differently. 359 00:15:26,447 --> 00:15:27,761 I understand. 360 00:15:28,511 --> 00:15:29,403 I get it. 361 00:15:30,341 --> 00:15:33,868 For the first time, Ted and Stella Mosby. 362 00:15:34,842 --> 00:15:37,094 And that's how I met your mother. 363 00:15:38,291 --> 00:15:40,250 Is your dad finally done yakking? 364 00:15:40,308 --> 00:15:41,970 Now, come on, who wants ice cream? 365 00:15:43,706 --> 00:15:44,844 But I didn't. 366 00:15:45,149 --> 00:15:46,216 Look, can you talk to Tony? 367 00:15:46,298 --> 00:15:47,812 Robin flew all the way here from Tokyo. 368 00:15:47,882 --> 00:15:48,891 I should talk to her. 369 00:15:50,650 --> 00:15:51,519 Sure. 370 00:15:57,544 --> 00:15:58,470 - Hi. - Hey. 371 00:15:58,564 --> 00:16:00,558 - Sorry about running off like that. - Oh, it's okay. 372 00:16:00,611 --> 00:16:02,241 You would not believe the trip I just had. 373 00:16:02,312 --> 00:16:04,881 I was on a plane for almost a full day. 374 00:16:04,939 --> 00:16:07,019 But it is worth it to see you get married. 375 00:16:07,113 --> 00:16:08,016 How could I not be here...? 376 00:16:08,086 --> 00:16:10,057 - You can't come to the wedding. - Oh, thank God! 377 00:16:10,174 --> 00:16:11,957 - What? - Ted, it's weird. 378 00:16:12,051 --> 00:16:14,057 - It's not weird. - It is weird. 379 00:16:14,127 --> 00:16:16,986 Do you know how it feels to be somebody's ex at their wedding? 380 00:16:17,126 --> 00:16:18,475 - Robin. - Stella. 381 00:16:20,493 --> 00:16:22,546 Suck it, bitch! I win! 382 00:16:24,394 --> 00:16:26,365 We broke up over a year ago. 383 00:16:26,435 --> 00:16:28,899 Yeah, but that's not that long ago. 384 00:16:29,110 --> 00:16:30,013 Watching your marry 385 00:16:30,095 --> 00:16:33,673 another woman isn't exactly something I was looking forward to. 386 00:16:34,095 --> 00:16:34,878 I don't know, I 387 00:16:34,978 --> 00:16:37,200 I just thought if I ever changed my mind about 388 00:16:37,364 --> 00:16:39,159 marriage and kids, it was... 389 00:16:39,405 --> 00:16:41,341 it was nice to know that you were there. 390 00:16:41,740 --> 00:16:43,135 So, I was your safety school... 391 00:16:43,194 --> 00:16:44,119 - how flattering. - Not that... 392 00:16:44,211 --> 00:16:45,278 That's not it. It's just that... 393 00:16:45,396 --> 00:16:47,038 Why are you bringing any of this up? 394 00:16:47,120 --> 00:16:48,575 There's nothing between us anymore. 395 00:16:48,622 --> 00:16:50,053 Well, maybe there is. 396 00:16:50,839 --> 00:16:53,880 I mean, of course there is. That kind of stuff just... 397 00:16:53,985 --> 00:16:56,484 doesn't disappear without a trace. 398 00:16:56,987 --> 00:16:59,333 Look, I'm not just another guest here, Ted. 399 00:16:59,498 --> 00:17:00,225 Right. 400 00:17:00,354 --> 00:17:01,887 We used to date, but 401 00:17:02,063 --> 00:17:03,506 we both moved on. And... look, 402 00:17:03,588 --> 00:17:05,336 we got what we wanted... I'm getting married, 403 00:17:05,383 --> 00:17:07,131 you got your dream job in Tokyo. 404 00:17:07,260 --> 00:17:09,113 - And they all lived happily ever... - I quit my job. 405 00:17:09,840 --> 00:17:12,151 - You what? - I'm moving back to New York. 406 00:17:12,444 --> 00:17:14,603 I thought I wanted that job, but... 407 00:17:15,459 --> 00:17:17,700 I want to come back to my real life. 408 00:17:19,236 --> 00:17:21,403 And I think you should go back to yours. 409 00:17:22,071 --> 00:17:23,279 What's that supposed to mean? 410 00:17:26,916 --> 00:17:28,241 Don't get married. 411 00:17:29,579 --> 00:17:31,157 Look, you're rushing into this. 412 00:17:31,415 --> 00:17:32,588 It's like you're trying 413 00:17:32,635 --> 00:17:34,547 to skip ahead to the end of the book. 414 00:17:34,840 --> 00:17:37,210 Ted, you're the most romantic guy I know. You... 415 00:17:37,386 --> 00:17:39,028 You stole a blue French horn for me. 416 00:17:39,134 --> 00:17:40,538 You tried to make it rain. 417 00:17:40,597 --> 00:17:42,661 - I did make it rain. - It was a coincidence. 418 00:17:43,084 --> 00:17:45,265 But after all that, this is how your great 419 00:17:45,406 --> 00:17:47,635 romantic quest comes to an end? 420 00:17:47,893 --> 00:17:50,153 You're just disappearing into someone else's wedding, 421 00:17:50,259 --> 00:17:51,191 someone else's 422 00:17:51,262 --> 00:17:54,171 house, someone else's life without a second thought. 423 00:17:54,757 --> 00:17:57,936 That's not the amazing ending that you deserve. 424 00:17:58,642 --> 00:18:00,249 That's not Ted Mosby. 425 00:18:05,281 --> 00:18:06,314 I love Stella. 426 00:18:07,803 --> 00:18:08,859 She's the one. 427 00:18:09,662 --> 00:18:11,293 If you really feel that way... 428 00:18:12,677 --> 00:18:15,582 I guess it's a good thing you're not coming to the wedding after all. 429 00:18:25,021 --> 00:18:26,980 - Big fight? - Yeah. 430 00:18:28,259 --> 00:18:29,092 Here... 431 00:18:30,601 --> 00:18:31,574 It's on the house. 432 00:18:32,278 --> 00:18:33,604 Just keep 'em coming. 433 00:18:36,384 --> 00:18:38,225 Oh God, do not keep them coming. 434 00:18:43,424 --> 00:18:44,738 Hey, Robin. 435 00:18:44,972 --> 00:18:46,087 Barney. 436 00:18:46,544 --> 00:18:48,761 I am having a horrible day. 437 00:18:48,949 --> 00:18:51,096 I snuck some scotch in from the duty free store. 438 00:18:51,178 --> 00:18:51,987 You want to join me? 439 00:18:52,175 --> 00:18:53,739 Yeah, yeah. Let's go to your room. 440 00:18:53,868 --> 00:18:56,108 Far away from this room. And we can knock it back. 441 00:18:56,355 --> 00:18:57,563 They didn't get me a room. 442 00:18:57,704 --> 00:19:00,613 I was actually hoping I could stay with you. 443 00:19:01,176 --> 00:19:02,619 No problem. 444 00:19:03,006 --> 00:19:05,734 I just have to straighten up little bit. 445 00:19:05,804 --> 00:19:07,998 I've got some clothes on the floor, and... 446 00:19:08,103 --> 00:19:10,707 And a naked girl tied to your headboard. 447 00:19:10,801 --> 00:19:13,218 Towels all over the bathroom. It's a mess. 448 00:19:14,041 --> 00:19:16,376 So, anyway... give me ten minutes 449 00:19:16,458 --> 00:19:18,381 - to get the place in order... - See ya, Barney. 450 00:19:31,192 --> 00:19:32,835 Okay, let's do this. 451 00:19:33,808 --> 00:19:34,946 Who the hell is that? 452 00:19:36,355 --> 00:19:38,982 It's the girl from the front desk. 453 00:19:47,501 --> 00:19:50,598 Kids, sometimes you think you're living out one story, 454 00:19:51,184 --> 00:19:53,917 but the truth turns out to be something else entirely. 455 00:20:00,209 --> 00:20:01,546 At the time I thought the story 456 00:20:01,628 --> 00:20:03,657 was about whether Robin should be at the wedding. 457 00:20:11,380 --> 00:20:14,125 If only I'd understood what the real story was. 458 00:20:23,322 --> 00:20:24,870 Having exes around... 459 00:20:25,105 --> 00:20:26,849 I don't know, brings up... 460 00:20:27,166 --> 00:20:28,597 unresolved things. 461 00:20:33,219 --> 00:20:34,647 How do you know that that spark won't come back 462 00:20:34,752 --> 00:20:36,242 with your ex sitting out there? 463 00:20:39,432 --> 00:20:42,119 It's like things are not finished between you two. 464 00:20:44,778 --> 00:20:47,007 I wasted years trying to get Lucy's dad 465 00:20:47,089 --> 00:20:49,294 to decide if he was ready for this. 466 00:20:49,446 --> 00:20:50,760 Seeing you guys... 467 00:20:52,037 --> 00:20:54,054 it's made me alize everything I had. 468 00:20:54,266 --> 00:20:57,444 I used to dream that Tony would be spontaneous like this. 469 00:21:03,576 --> 00:21:05,183 Seriously, kids, 470 00:21:05,336 --> 00:21:07,212 never invite an ex 471 00:21:07,412 --> 00:21:09,523 to your wedding. 472 00:21:10,365 --> 00:21:20,365 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org