1 00:00:02,167 --> 00:00:04,127 In November, 2009, 2 00:00:02,167 --> 00:00:04,127 Uncle Marshall and Aunt Lily 3 00:00:04,169 --> 00:00:07,130 hosted the first Thanksgiving 4 00:00:04,169 --> 00:00:07,130 at their very own apartment. 5 00:00:07,172 --> 00:00:09,132 And Marshall had 6 00:00:07,172 --> 00:00:09,132 found the perfect turkey. 7 00:00:09,174 --> 00:00:12,427 Oh, baby, it is beautiful. 8 00:00:12,469 --> 00:00:15,221 It's 22 pounds. 9 00:00:12,469 --> 00:00:15,221 It's organic. 10 00:00:15,263 --> 00:00:17,140 You remember my 11 00:00:15,263 --> 00:00:17,140 bald Uncle Heinrek? 12 00:00:17,182 --> 00:00:19,559 It looks 13 00:00:17,182 --> 00:00:19,559 exactly like his head. 14 00:00:19,601 --> 00:00:25,106 Oh, my God. 15 00:00:19,601 --> 00:00:25,106 My turkey. My turkey! 16 00:00:25,148 --> 00:00:26,984 So, when we 17 00:00:25,148 --> 00:00:26,984 showed up for the big day, 18 00:00:27,026 --> 00:00:28,193 Marshall was 19 00:00:27,026 --> 00:00:28,193 pretty bummed out. 20 00:00:28,234 --> 00:00:29,611 Well, we got the turkey. 21 00:00:29,653 --> 00:00:31,030 No. You didn't. 22 00:00:31,071 --> 00:00:33,156 You got 23 00:00:31,071 --> 00:00:33,156 the pathetic 24 00:00:31,071 --> 00:00:33,156 replacement turkey. 25 00:00:33,198 --> 00:00:35,158 Damn it, you know, 26 00:00:33,198 --> 00:00:35,158 why didn't I just listen 27 00:00:33,198 --> 00:00:35,158 to the prerecorded voice 28 00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:38,537 of former Mayor Ed Koch 29 00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:38,537 reminding me to take 30 00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:38,537 my belongings? 31 00:00:38,578 --> 00:00:40,998 No, Marshall, 32 00:00:38,578 --> 00:00:40,998 you don't understand. 33 00:00:41,040 --> 00:00:43,166 Robin and I went to 34 00:00:41,040 --> 00:00:43,166 the Port Authority 35 00:00:41,040 --> 00:00:43,166 Lost and Found, 36 00:00:43,208 --> 00:00:45,836 and there, 37 00:00:43,208 --> 00:00:45,836 sitting in their fridge... 38 00:00:45,878 --> 00:00:49,798 Marshall Eriksen, 39 00:00:45,878 --> 00:00:49,798 is this your turkey? 40 00:00:49,840 --> 00:00:51,884 Yes! That's my turkey! 41 00:00:51,925 --> 00:00:54,177 Come here, 42 00:00:51,925 --> 00:00:54,177 you handsome 43 00:00:51,925 --> 00:00:54,177 little bastard! 44 00:00:54,219 --> 00:00:56,596 Okay, I'm going to 45 00:00:54,219 --> 00:00:56,596 go put this in the oven. 46 00:00:54,219 --> 00:00:56,596 Okay. 47 00:00:56,638 --> 00:01:00,183 Oh, my God! You guys 48 00:00:56,638 --> 00:01:00,183 are the best friends ever! 49 00:01:00,225 --> 00:01:02,936 It was totally 50 00:01:00,225 --> 00:01:02,936 a team effort. 51 00:01:00,225 --> 00:01:02,936 I'm so... 52 00:01:05,146 --> 00:01:07,024 Guys, I don't know 53 00:01:05,146 --> 00:01:07,024 what to say. 54 00:01:07,066 --> 00:01:09,317 I mean, it's Thanksgiving, 55 00:01:07,066 --> 00:01:09,317 but "thanks" just doesn't 56 00:01:07,066 --> 00:01:09,317 seem like enough. 57 00:01:09,359 --> 00:01:11,528 Come on, buddy, 58 00:01:09,359 --> 00:01:11,528 you would've done 59 00:01:09,359 --> 00:01:11,528 the same thing for us. 60 00:01:11,570 --> 00:01:14,322 Yeah, I would, 61 00:01:11,570 --> 00:01:14,322 and you know why? 62 00:01:11,570 --> 00:01:14,322 Because I love you guys. 63 00:01:14,364 --> 00:01:16,199 And I'm gonna 64 00:01:14,364 --> 00:01:16,199 show you just how much. 65 00:01:16,241 --> 00:01:19,119 Ted Mosby, 66 00:01:16,241 --> 00:01:19,119 Robin Scherbatsky, 67 00:01:19,160 --> 00:01:23,206 I bequeath unto you 68 00:01:19,160 --> 00:01:23,206 the fourth slap. 69 00:01:23,248 --> 00:01:25,166 Wait, what? 70 00:01:25,208 --> 00:01:27,669 Kids, 71 00:01:25,208 --> 00:01:27,669 you remember Barney 72 00:01:25,208 --> 00:01:27,669 and Marshall's Slap Bet. 73 00:01:27,711 --> 00:01:30,756 When Barney lost, Marshall 74 00:01:27,711 --> 00:01:30,756 won the right to slap Barney 75 00:01:30,797 --> 00:01:32,674 five times as 76 00:01:30,797 --> 00:01:32,674 hard as he could. 77 00:01:32,716 --> 00:01:34,885 So far, 78 00:01:32,716 --> 00:01:34,885 he'd used three 79 00:01:32,716 --> 00:01:34,885 of those five slaps. 80 00:01:37,637 --> 00:01:39,347 With 81 00:01:37,637 --> 00:01:39,347 the third being doled out 82 00:01:37,637 --> 00:01:39,347 exactly two years earlier 83 00:01:39,389 --> 00:01:42,225 on Thanksgiving Day, 2007. 84 00:01:42,267 --> 00:01:46,229 A day that history came 85 00:01:42,267 --> 00:01:46,229 to know as "Slapsgiving." 86 00:01:46,271 --> 00:01:48,899 Are you saying... 87 00:01:46,271 --> 00:01:48,899 What we think you're saying? 88 00:01:48,941 --> 00:01:51,234 Probably not. 89 00:01:51,276 --> 00:01:55,155 Unless you think I'm saying, 90 00:01:51,276 --> 00:01:55,155 "Slapsgiving 2: Revenge of 91 00:01:51,276 --> 00:01:55,155 the Slap," 92 00:01:55,196 --> 00:01:58,491 in which case, yes, 93 00:01:55,196 --> 00:01:58,491 that's exactly what 94 00:01:55,196 --> 00:01:58,491 I'm saying! 95 00:01:58,533 --> 00:02:01,536 No way! Uh-uh. 96 00:01:58,533 --> 00:02:01,536 Slaps aren't transferable. 97 00:02:01,578 --> 00:02:03,246 Lily is the Slap 98 00:02:01,578 --> 00:02:03,246 Bet Commissioner. Lil? 99 00:02:03,288 --> 00:02:05,373 You... 100 00:02:05,415 --> 00:02:06,959 Slaps are transferable. 101 00:02:05,415 --> 00:02:06,959 No! 102 00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:08,794 Transferable! 103 00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:08,794 Transferable! 104 00:02:08,835 --> 00:02:11,004 Wait, Marshall, you realize 105 00:02:08,835 --> 00:02:11,004 you'll only have one left 106 00:02:08,835 --> 00:02:11,004 after this. 107 00:02:11,046 --> 00:02:13,256 Are you sure you want 108 00:02:11,046 --> 00:02:13,256 to spend this slap today? 109 00:02:13,298 --> 00:02:16,135 Life is short. 110 00:02:13,298 --> 00:02:16,135 I figured, "Slap-e diem." 111 00:02:16,176 --> 00:02:19,179 Okay, rule number one, 112 00:02:16,176 --> 00:02:19,179 the slap must occur 113 00:02:16,176 --> 00:02:19,179 before sundown, 114 00:02:19,220 --> 00:02:20,180 so as 115 00:02:19,220 --> 00:02:20,180 not to interfere 116 00:02:19,220 --> 00:02:20,180 with Lily's meal. 117 00:02:20,221 --> 00:02:22,682 Damn straight. 118 00:02:22,724 --> 00:02:24,559 Two, you guys have to decide 119 00:02:22,724 --> 00:02:24,559 amongst yourselves who 120 00:02:22,724 --> 00:02:24,559 gets to do it. 121 00:02:24,601 --> 00:02:27,395 Three, we're going to 122 00:02:24,601 --> 00:02:27,395 tie Barney to this chair, 123 00:02:27,437 --> 00:02:30,149 which shall 124 00:02:27,437 --> 00:02:30,149 henceforth be referred 125 00:02:27,437 --> 00:02:30,149 to as the slapping throne. 126 00:02:30,190 --> 00:02:31,316 Sound fair? 127 00:02:30,190 --> 00:02:31,316 Totally. 128 00:02:31,357 --> 00:02:33,693 Amazing. 129 00:02:31,357 --> 00:02:33,693 Absolutely not! 130 00:02:33,735 --> 00:02:36,155 It was 131 00:02:33,735 --> 00:02:36,155 all set to be the best 132 00:02:33,735 --> 00:02:36,155 Thanksgiving ever, until... 133 00:02:37,322 --> 00:02:40,117 Are we expecting 134 00:02:37,322 --> 00:02:40,117 somebody else? 135 00:02:40,159 --> 00:02:42,995 It was someone 136 00:02:40,159 --> 00:02:42,995 Lily hadn't seen or 137 00:02:40,159 --> 00:02:42,995 spoken to in three years. 138 00:02:44,329 --> 00:02:45,747 Dad. 139 00:02:59,511 --> 00:03:03,348 Now, Lily and her 140 00:02:59,511 --> 00:03:03,348 dad, Mickey, had always had 141 00:02:59,511 --> 00:03:03,348 a tough relationship. 142 00:03:03,389 --> 00:03:06,476 Mickey's dream 143 00:03:03,389 --> 00:03:06,476 was to invent the next 144 00:03:03,389 --> 00:03:06,476 great American board game, 145 00:03:06,518 --> 00:03:08,436 but his ideas were 146 00:03:06,518 --> 00:03:08,436 always a little off. 147 00:03:08,478 --> 00:03:10,271 Daddy? 148 00:03:08,478 --> 00:03:10,271 Yeah? 149 00:03:10,313 --> 00:03:11,773 You missed 150 00:03:10,313 --> 00:03:11,773 my ballet recital. 151 00:03:11,815 --> 00:03:13,900 Yes, sweetie, but, look! 152 00:03:13,942 --> 00:03:17,112 I just put 153 00:03:13,942 --> 00:03:17,112 the finishing touches 154 00:03:13,942 --> 00:03:17,112 on my new, hit board game. 155 00:03:17,154 --> 00:03:18,488 Tijuana Slumlord. 156 00:03:20,365 --> 00:03:22,117 Daddy? 157 00:03:20,365 --> 00:03:22,117 Uh-huh. 158 00:03:22,159 --> 00:03:24,119 You missed my 159 00:03:22,159 --> 00:03:24,119 gymnastics meet. 160 00:03:22,159 --> 00:03:24,119 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 161 00:03:24,161 --> 00:03:26,038 But this is the one! 162 00:03:27,039 --> 00:03:28,456 Car Battery. 163 00:03:28,498 --> 00:03:30,333 "How Long 164 00:03:28,498 --> 00:03:30,333 Can You Hold On?" 165 00:03:32,544 --> 00:03:34,838 Ah, here, princess. 166 00:03:32,544 --> 00:03:34,838 Grab these. 167 00:03:37,298 --> 00:03:38,341 Daddy? 168 00:03:37,298 --> 00:03:38,341 Hmm? 169 00:03:38,383 --> 00:03:40,135 I had a nightmare. 170 00:03:40,177 --> 00:03:42,971 Oh, sweetie. 171 00:03:43,013 --> 00:03:45,515 Here. Come play 172 00:03:43,013 --> 00:03:45,515 Daddy's new game. 173 00:03:45,557 --> 00:03:47,767 There's a Clown Demon 174 00:03:45,557 --> 00:03:47,767 Under the Bed! 175 00:03:49,769 --> 00:03:51,354 Her whole life, 176 00:03:49,769 --> 00:03:51,354 Mickey disappointed Lily, 177 00:03:51,396 --> 00:03:53,314 and she always 178 00:03:51,396 --> 00:03:53,314 put up with it, 179 00:03:53,356 --> 00:03:57,485 until one day in 2006, 180 00:03:53,356 --> 00:03:57,485 when Lily went to 181 00:03:53,356 --> 00:03:57,485 visit her grandparents. 182 00:03:57,527 --> 00:04:00,363 So, Rita, are you excited 183 00:03:57,527 --> 00:04:00,363 about the big move to Florida? 184 00:04:00,405 --> 00:04:02,365 Actually, dear, 185 00:04:00,405 --> 00:04:02,365 slight change of plans. 186 00:04:02,407 --> 00:04:04,743 We're staying here 187 00:04:02,407 --> 00:04:04,743 for the time being. 188 00:04:04,784 --> 00:04:07,620 We had a slight 189 00:04:04,784 --> 00:04:07,620 financial hiccup. 190 00:04:07,662 --> 00:04:10,916 Ma! 191 00:04:07,662 --> 00:04:10,916 The straw to my 192 00:04:07,662 --> 00:04:10,916 juice box broke! 193 00:04:13,418 --> 00:04:15,003 Ma, chop-chop! 194 00:04:17,422 --> 00:04:20,633 Oh, hey, guys. 195 00:04:17,422 --> 00:04:20,633 What a pleasant surprise. 196 00:04:20,675 --> 00:04:23,053 Dad, what happened 197 00:04:20,675 --> 00:04:23,053 to your apartment? 198 00:04:23,095 --> 00:04:25,722 Oh, well, I had a little 199 00:04:23,095 --> 00:04:25,722 falling-out with my roommate. 200 00:04:25,764 --> 00:04:27,891 What happened? 201 00:04:25,764 --> 00:04:27,891 Uh, he wanted me to pay rent. 202 00:04:27,933 --> 00:04:29,309 Got kind of ugly. 203 00:04:29,350 --> 00:04:31,144 Dad! You should be 204 00:04:29,350 --> 00:04:31,144 paying rent, 205 00:04:31,186 --> 00:04:33,063 not living in 206 00:04:31,186 --> 00:04:33,063 your parents' basement. 207 00:04:33,105 --> 00:04:35,398 Hey, it's not 208 00:04:33,105 --> 00:04:35,398 my first choice. 209 00:04:35,440 --> 00:04:39,111 Having the 210 00:04:35,440 --> 00:04:39,111 old farts right upstairs 211 00:04:35,440 --> 00:04:39,111 is crimping my style a bit. 212 00:04:39,152 --> 00:04:41,529 Clearly, they're 213 00:04:39,152 --> 00:04:41,529 not getting the whole 214 00:04:39,152 --> 00:04:41,529 sock-on-the-doorknob thing. 215 00:04:41,571 --> 00:04:42,906 Oh, they caught you 216 00:04:41,571 --> 00:04:42,906 with a girl? 217 00:04:43,740 --> 00:04:46,118 In a way. 218 00:04:46,159 --> 00:04:47,827 Bye, sweetheart. 219 00:04:46,159 --> 00:04:47,827 I'm off to work. 220 00:04:47,869 --> 00:04:49,454 Work? You're retired. 221 00:04:49,495 --> 00:04:51,414 Now that I have 222 00:04:49,495 --> 00:04:51,414 an extra mouth to feed, 223 00:04:51,456 --> 00:04:53,666 I had to go back 224 00:04:51,456 --> 00:04:53,666 to the steel mill. 225 00:04:53,708 --> 00:04:56,419 Rita? Where's my truss? 226 00:04:56,461 --> 00:04:59,380 So, not only 227 00:04:56,461 --> 00:04:59,380 did you stop them 228 00:04:56,461 --> 00:04:59,380 from moving to Florida, 229 00:04:59,422 --> 00:05:02,050 but now 230 00:04:59,422 --> 00:05:02,050 you forced Grandpa 231 00:04:59,422 --> 00:05:02,050 to go back to work? 232 00:05:02,092 --> 00:05:05,386 Just until 233 00:05:02,092 --> 00:05:05,386 I get Aldrin Games 234 00:05:02,092 --> 00:05:05,386 Unlimited off the ground, 235 00:05:05,428 --> 00:05:09,474 with my new sensation, 236 00:05:05,428 --> 00:05:09,474 Dog Fight Promoter. 237 00:05:09,515 --> 00:05:11,310 And then 238 00:05:09,515 --> 00:05:11,310 Lily gave her dad 239 00:05:09,515 --> 00:05:11,310 a look 240 00:05:11,351 --> 00:05:14,146 that Marshall 241 00:05:11,351 --> 00:05:14,146 had only seen 242 00:05:11,351 --> 00:05:14,146 a few times before, 243 00:05:14,187 --> 00:05:17,232 a look 244 00:05:14,187 --> 00:05:17,232 we all prayed never to 245 00:05:14,187 --> 00:05:17,232 be on the receiving end of. 246 00:05:17,274 --> 00:05:19,276 Her you're-dead-to-me look. 247 00:05:23,529 --> 00:05:26,449 Which brings us back 248 00:05:23,529 --> 00:05:26,449 to Thanksgiving of 2009. 249 00:05:26,491 --> 00:05:29,953 Hey, princess. 250 00:05:26,491 --> 00:05:29,953 I brought Diseases! 251 00:05:38,003 --> 00:05:39,671 My God! What is 252 00:05:38,003 --> 00:05:39,671 my father doing here? 253 00:05:39,712 --> 00:05:42,465 I don't know, but maybe 254 00:05:39,712 --> 00:05:42,465 we should let him in 255 00:05:39,712 --> 00:05:42,465 and find out. 256 00:05:42,507 --> 00:05:44,676 No, I don't want to see him! 257 00:05:42,507 --> 00:05:44,676 Get rid of him! 258 00:05:51,350 --> 00:05:54,519 Hey, Mickey. 259 00:05:51,350 --> 00:05:54,519 Just hang tight, okay? 260 00:05:54,560 --> 00:05:56,271 We'll work this out. 261 00:05:56,313 --> 00:05:59,274 Take your time, amigo. 262 00:05:56,313 --> 00:05:59,274 I'm okay, as long as 263 00:05:56,313 --> 00:05:59,274 I have "Diseases!" 264 00:05:59,316 --> 00:06:00,900 The fun's infectious. 265 00:06:08,533 --> 00:06:11,494 God, I hope Lily's okay. 266 00:06:08,533 --> 00:06:11,494 Me, too. 267 00:06:11,536 --> 00:06:13,496 She doesn't 268 00:06:11,536 --> 00:06:13,496 talk about it much, 269 00:06:13,538 --> 00:06:15,248 but this 270 00:06:13,538 --> 00:06:15,248 thing with her dad 271 00:06:13,538 --> 00:06:15,248 causes her a lot of pain. 272 00:06:15,290 --> 00:06:17,500 Just tell me which one 273 00:06:15,290 --> 00:06:17,500 of you is gonna slap me! 274 00:06:17,542 --> 00:06:19,460 What? 275 00:06:17,542 --> 00:06:19,460 I'm dying over here! 276 00:06:19,502 --> 00:06:21,046 Ted reaches for a chip, 277 00:06:19,502 --> 00:06:21,046 I flinch! 278 00:06:21,087 --> 00:06:22,797 Robin fixes her hair, 279 00:06:21,087 --> 00:06:22,797 I flinch! 280 00:06:22,839 --> 00:06:25,508 I'm doing 281 00:06:22,839 --> 00:06:25,508 so much flinching. 282 00:06:22,839 --> 00:06:25,508 It's bad for my skin. 283 00:06:25,550 --> 00:06:27,302 I'm getting crow's feet. 284 00:06:25,550 --> 00:06:27,302 Crow's feet! 285 00:06:29,470 --> 00:06:31,514 Lily, come on. 286 00:06:29,470 --> 00:06:31,514 It's been three years, okay? 287 00:06:31,556 --> 00:06:33,225 That's long enough. 288 00:06:33,266 --> 00:06:36,561 Having him in 289 00:06:33,266 --> 00:06:36,561 my life causes me 290 00:06:33,266 --> 00:06:36,561 nothing but stress. 291 00:06:36,602 --> 00:06:39,022 It's just easier for 292 00:06:36,602 --> 00:06:39,022 him to be dead to me. 293 00:06:39,064 --> 00:06:41,358 Okay, Lily, look. 294 00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:44,152 I supported 295 00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:44,152 you when our neighbor, 296 00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:44,152 Mr. Ossias, was dead to you. 297 00:06:45,570 --> 00:06:47,530 Hey! That's our newspaper. 298 00:06:47,572 --> 00:06:49,490 You'll get it back 299 00:06:47,572 --> 00:06:49,490 in 15 minutes. 300 00:06:50,575 --> 00:06:53,203 Make it 20. 301 00:06:50,575 --> 00:06:53,203 I had a steak last night. 302 00:07:01,586 --> 00:07:05,090 And I was fine 303 00:07:01,586 --> 00:07:05,090 when your bridesmaid, 304 00:07:01,586 --> 00:07:05,090 Whitney, was dead to you. 305 00:07:05,131 --> 00:07:08,134 Lily! You look so amazing! 306 00:07:08,176 --> 00:07:09,552 That dress is gorgeous! 307 00:07:09,594 --> 00:07:11,721 Thanks, guys. 308 00:07:09,594 --> 00:07:11,721 Hmm. 309 00:07:11,763 --> 00:07:14,266 I... I'm just not 310 00:07:11,763 --> 00:07:14,266 a fan of strapless. 311 00:07:22,607 --> 00:07:26,611 I even understood when 312 00:07:22,607 --> 00:07:26,611 Mr. Park from the bodega 313 00:07:22,607 --> 00:07:26,611 downstairs was dead to you. 314 00:07:26,652 --> 00:07:29,448 One coffee, please. 315 00:07:26,652 --> 00:07:29,448 But only if you 316 00:07:26,652 --> 00:07:29,448 have decaf. 317 00:07:29,489 --> 00:07:30,615 I don't want to 318 00:07:29,489 --> 00:07:30,615 be up all night. 319 00:07:30,656 --> 00:07:32,033 $1.50. 320 00:07:34,619 --> 00:07:36,704 Coffee, regular. 321 00:07:34,619 --> 00:07:36,704 $1.50. 322 00:07:42,335 --> 00:07:44,296 Excuse me. 323 00:07:42,335 --> 00:07:44,296 Are you sure 324 00:07:42,335 --> 00:07:44,296 mine was decaf? 325 00:07:44,337 --> 00:07:46,714 You just used the same pot. 326 00:07:46,756 --> 00:07:48,425 I lie to him. Okay? 327 00:07:48,467 --> 00:07:49,550 Okay. 328 00:07:55,098 --> 00:07:57,142 You son of a bitch. 329 00:07:58,935 --> 00:08:00,561 That was not decaf! 330 00:08:09,446 --> 00:08:12,198 I supported you with 331 00:08:09,446 --> 00:08:12,198 all of those random people, 332 00:08:12,240 --> 00:08:14,242 but this is your father. 333 00:08:14,284 --> 00:08:17,036 Okay, can't 334 00:08:14,284 --> 00:08:17,036 we at least just 335 00:08:14,284 --> 00:08:17,036 give him some turkey? 336 00:08:17,078 --> 00:08:18,621 No. 337 00:08:17,078 --> 00:08:18,621 Come on, Lily. 338 00:08:18,663 --> 00:08:20,999 Please, I can't ask the guy 339 00:08:18,663 --> 00:08:20,999 to leave on Thanksgiving. 340 00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:23,042 Oh, you don't have to ask. 341 00:08:23,084 --> 00:08:25,670 Just tell him that it's 342 00:08:23,084 --> 00:08:25,670 really important that 343 00:08:23,084 --> 00:08:25,670 he be here. 344 00:08:25,711 --> 00:08:27,255 And before you know it, 345 00:08:27,297 --> 00:08:29,466 he'll be 346 00:08:27,297 --> 00:08:29,466 at a board game 347 00:08:27,297 --> 00:08:29,466 convention in Toledo, 348 00:08:29,508 --> 00:08:33,636 giving your braces money to 349 00:08:29,508 --> 00:08:33,636 some guy claiming to be 350 00:08:29,508 --> 00:08:33,636 Milton Bradley. 351 00:08:33,678 --> 00:08:36,222 He was just out trying 352 00:08:33,678 --> 00:08:36,222 to provide for the family. 353 00:08:36,264 --> 00:08:40,268 No. No, that's 354 00:08:36,264 --> 00:08:40,268 what my mom did 355 00:08:36,264 --> 00:08:40,268 by working two jobs. 356 00:08:40,310 --> 00:08:45,231 Marshall, that man broke 357 00:08:40,310 --> 00:08:45,231 my heart every single 358 00:08:40,310 --> 00:08:45,231 day for 20 years. 359 00:08:47,859 --> 00:08:49,610 Well, then we'll just 360 00:08:47,859 --> 00:08:49,610 give him some dark meat. 361 00:08:51,737 --> 00:08:54,115 No, seriously, Robin, 362 00:08:51,737 --> 00:08:54,115 you should get the slap. 363 00:08:54,157 --> 00:08:56,409 I mean, 364 00:08:54,157 --> 00:08:56,409 you're a great slapper. 365 00:08:56,451 --> 00:08:59,078 In fact, I want to study 366 00:08:56,451 --> 00:08:59,078 slapping under your tutelage. 367 00:08:59,120 --> 00:09:02,248 I want to be 368 00:08:59,120 --> 00:09:02,248 your slap-prentice. 369 00:09:02,290 --> 00:09:05,668 Don't sell 370 00:09:02,290 --> 00:09:05,668 yourself short there, Teddy. 371 00:09:02,290 --> 00:09:05,668 You're a slapping rock star. 372 00:09:05,710 --> 00:09:07,795 Your name should 373 00:09:05,710 --> 00:09:07,795 be Eric Slap-ton. 374 00:09:07,837 --> 00:09:09,797 Okay, okay, guys, 375 00:09:07,837 --> 00:09:09,797 this is torture. 376 00:09:09,839 --> 00:09:11,508 Just put me in the chair... 377 00:09:09,839 --> 00:09:11,508 Slapping throne. 378 00:09:11,550 --> 00:09:13,176 and get it over with! 379 00:09:13,218 --> 00:09:14,760 Okay, he's all yours. 380 00:09:14,802 --> 00:09:15,678 No, no, no, no. 381 00:09:14,802 --> 00:09:15,678 It's you, I insist. 382 00:09:15,720 --> 00:09:16,888 Okay, I'll do it. 383 00:09:15,720 --> 00:09:16,888 Great. 384 00:09:16,929 --> 00:09:18,598 Wait, what? 385 00:09:18,639 --> 00:09:19,682 I'm just saying, 386 00:09:18,639 --> 00:09:19,682 I'll slap him. 387 00:09:19,724 --> 00:09:22,852 What, so that's just, like, 388 00:09:19,724 --> 00:09:22,852 the end of the discussion? 389 00:09:22,894 --> 00:09:24,604 Well, you said 390 00:09:22,894 --> 00:09:24,604 I could slap him. 391 00:09:24,645 --> 00:09:25,897 Uh... 392 00:09:25,938 --> 00:09:28,316 I was just being nice. 393 00:09:28,358 --> 00:09:30,693 If anyone's gonna slap him, 394 00:09:28,358 --> 00:09:30,693 it's gonna be me. 395 00:09:30,735 --> 00:09:32,487 No, it's not. 396 00:09:35,114 --> 00:09:36,741 This is interesting. 397 00:09:39,035 --> 00:09:40,703 Lily, he's family, okay? 398 00:09:40,745 --> 00:09:44,082 And I'm sorry, but you 399 00:09:40,745 --> 00:09:44,082 just don't cut off family. 400 00:09:44,123 --> 00:09:46,792 Well, 401 00:09:44,123 --> 00:09:46,792 that's easy for you to say 402 00:09:44,123 --> 00:09:46,792 when you come from the most 403 00:09:46,834 --> 00:09:49,712 ridiculously close 404 00:09:46,834 --> 00:09:49,712 family in the world. 405 00:09:49,754 --> 00:09:51,089 We are not 406 00:09:49,754 --> 00:09:51,089 ridiculously close. 407 00:09:51,130 --> 00:09:52,715 Really? 408 00:09:51,130 --> 00:09:52,715 Yeah. 409 00:09:52,757 --> 00:09:55,718 What about the Eriksen 410 00:09:52,757 --> 00:09:55,718 family dinner every 411 00:09:52,757 --> 00:09:55,718 single Sunday? 412 00:09:55,760 --> 00:09:57,845 Everything looks delicious, 413 00:09:55,760 --> 00:09:57,845 Mother Eriksen. 414 00:09:57,887 --> 00:10:00,265 Thank you, Papa Bear. 415 00:10:00,306 --> 00:10:03,602 Marshall, would you like 416 00:10:00,306 --> 00:10:03,602 to say grace? 417 00:10:03,643 --> 00:10:06,729 Well, I would be 418 00:10:03,643 --> 00:10:06,729 happy to, Mother. 419 00:10:06,771 --> 00:10:08,689 Everyone, please join hands. 420 00:10:13,903 --> 00:10:15,655 Dear Lord... 421 00:10:15,696 --> 00:10:17,740 I'm sorry, 422 00:10:15,696 --> 00:10:17,740 but that's weird. 423 00:10:17,782 --> 00:10:21,620 A family should be that close. 424 00:10:17,782 --> 00:10:21,620 And I want our future family 425 00:10:17,782 --> 00:10:21,620 to be that close, 426 00:10:21,661 --> 00:10:22,995 and that includes your dad. 427 00:10:23,037 --> 00:10:25,415 I can't believe 428 00:10:23,037 --> 00:10:25,415 you're taking his side. 429 00:10:25,457 --> 00:10:27,750 Lily... 430 00:10:25,457 --> 00:10:27,750 Let me be clear on this. 431 00:10:27,792 --> 00:10:33,423 That man will never cross 432 00:10:27,792 --> 00:10:33,423 the threshold into this 433 00:10:27,792 --> 00:10:33,423 home, ever! 434 00:10:33,465 --> 00:10:35,758 It's just gonna be, 435 00:10:33,465 --> 00:10:35,758 like, five more minutes. 436 00:10:35,800 --> 00:10:37,469 Hopefully soon, amigo. 437 00:10:37,510 --> 00:10:40,763 I'm fighting 438 00:10:37,510 --> 00:10:40,763 a losing battle 439 00:10:37,510 --> 00:10:40,763 with hemorrhoids here. 440 00:10:40,805 --> 00:10:41,722 That's one 441 00:10:40,805 --> 00:10:41,722 of the diseases? 442 00:10:42,848 --> 00:10:43,891 No. 443 00:10:47,812 --> 00:10:50,398 Ted, there is an hour 444 00:10:47,812 --> 00:10:50,398 before the sun sets, 445 00:10:50,440 --> 00:10:52,066 at which point, 446 00:10:50,440 --> 00:10:52,066 neither one of us 447 00:10:50,440 --> 00:10:52,066 gets to slap Barney. 448 00:10:52,108 --> 00:10:54,360 So, just let me have it. 449 00:10:54,402 --> 00:10:56,488 I'm the one who had the idea 450 00:10:54,402 --> 00:10:56,488 to call the Port Authority 451 00:10:54,402 --> 00:10:56,488 Lost and Found. 452 00:10:56,529 --> 00:10:57,822 That's a good point. 453 00:10:56,529 --> 00:10:57,822 Rebuttal? 454 00:10:57,863 --> 00:10:59,824 I'm the one who 455 00:10:57,863 --> 00:10:59,824 slipped the guy 456 00:10:57,863 --> 00:10:59,824 a 20! 457 00:10:59,865 --> 00:11:02,076 Philosophical conundrum. 458 00:10:59,865 --> 00:11:02,076 Idea versus execution. 459 00:11:02,118 --> 00:11:04,203 Please discuss at length. 460 00:11:04,245 --> 00:11:06,498 I carried 461 00:11:04,245 --> 00:11:06,498 that huge turkey 462 00:11:04,245 --> 00:11:06,498 all the way up here. 463 00:11:06,539 --> 00:11:07,873 I paid for cab fare. 464 00:11:07,915 --> 00:11:10,168 Well, you slept with 465 00:11:07,915 --> 00:11:10,168 one of my best friends! 466 00:11:10,209 --> 00:11:12,504 What? You said you 467 00:11:10,209 --> 00:11:12,504 were okay with that. 468 00:11:12,545 --> 00:11:13,796 Well, I'm not! 469 00:11:13,838 --> 00:11:15,465 Well, why didn't you 470 00:11:13,838 --> 00:11:15,465 say something at the time? 471 00:11:15,507 --> 00:11:17,467 Because I'm still 472 00:11:15,507 --> 00:11:17,467 in love with you! 473 00:11:21,095 --> 00:11:23,264 Do you really want 474 00:11:21,095 --> 00:11:23,264 to slap Barney so bad 475 00:11:23,306 --> 00:11:24,849 that you 476 00:11:23,306 --> 00:11:24,849 would lie about 477 00:11:23,306 --> 00:11:24,849 being in love with me? 478 00:11:24,890 --> 00:11:28,603 I really want 479 00:11:24,890 --> 00:11:28,603 to slap him, okay? 480 00:11:28,645 --> 00:11:32,148 Yes, your dad has made some 481 00:11:28,645 --> 00:11:32,148 mistakes in the past, but 482 00:11:28,645 --> 00:11:32,148 he's a different person now. 483 00:11:32,190 --> 00:11:34,025 He's moved out of 484 00:11:32,190 --> 00:11:34,025 your grandparents' house. 485 00:11:34,066 --> 00:11:36,402 He's got a job. 486 00:11:34,066 --> 00:11:36,402 He's paying off 487 00:11:34,066 --> 00:11:36,402 his IRS debts. 488 00:11:36,444 --> 00:11:38,196 Wait, how do 489 00:11:36,444 --> 00:11:38,196 you know all that? 490 00:11:40,323 --> 00:11:41,199 Like, body language. 491 00:11:43,242 --> 00:11:45,203 Okay, well, yeah, 492 00:11:43,242 --> 00:11:45,203 we met for a drink last week. 493 00:11:46,912 --> 00:11:49,874 I miss her a ton. 494 00:11:46,912 --> 00:11:49,874 Little princess. 495 00:11:51,584 --> 00:11:53,794 She ever talk about me? 496 00:11:53,836 --> 00:11:57,048 Yeah. Yeah, like, 497 00:11:53,836 --> 00:11:57,048 all the time. Um... 498 00:11:57,089 --> 00:11:59,050 She tells this one 499 00:11:57,089 --> 00:11:59,050 really sweet story about... 500 00:11:59,091 --> 00:12:02,428 So never, huh? 501 00:11:59,091 --> 00:12:02,428 No, not a word. 502 00:12:02,470 --> 00:12:06,432 But it doesn't 503 00:12:02,470 --> 00:12:06,432 have to be that way. 504 00:12:02,470 --> 00:12:06,432 We can fix this, right? 505 00:12:07,892 --> 00:12:11,604 You know, I always thought 506 00:12:07,892 --> 00:12:11,604 it'd get fixed at the wedding. 507 00:12:11,646 --> 00:12:13,064 I even wrote a toast. 508 00:12:14,691 --> 00:12:16,234 But then, no invite. 509 00:12:19,237 --> 00:12:21,864 Hell, I haven't even 510 00:12:19,237 --> 00:12:21,864 seen a wedding photo. 511 00:12:21,906 --> 00:12:25,993 And then, 512 00:12:21,906 --> 00:12:25,993 right before my eyes, 513 00:12:21,906 --> 00:12:25,993 your father broke down crying. 514 00:12:28,913 --> 00:12:31,708 That's it! You're 515 00:12:28,913 --> 00:12:31,708 coming to Thanksgiving! 516 00:12:33,251 --> 00:12:34,877 You invited him? 517 00:12:34,919 --> 00:12:38,464 The guy 518 00:12:34,919 --> 00:12:38,464 was, like, blubbering. 519 00:12:34,919 --> 00:12:38,464 What was I going to do? 520 00:12:38,506 --> 00:12:40,675 And then, 521 00:12:38,506 --> 00:12:40,675 some jerk at the next 522 00:12:38,506 --> 00:12:40,675 table called him a sissy, 523 00:12:40,717 --> 00:12:41,967 which I thought was 524 00:12:40,717 --> 00:12:41,967 totally uncalled for. 525 00:12:42,009 --> 00:12:43,636 I can't believe you. 526 00:12:43,678 --> 00:12:45,930 Marshall, what gives you 527 00:12:43,678 --> 00:12:45,930 the right to do that? 528 00:12:45,971 --> 00:12:48,849 You and I are married. 529 00:12:45,971 --> 00:12:48,849 And that means he's 530 00:12:45,971 --> 00:12:48,849 my family, too. 531 00:12:55,856 --> 00:12:58,401 Mickey, come on in. 532 00:13:11,956 --> 00:13:16,043 Ted, you better roll quickly. 533 00:13:11,956 --> 00:13:16,043 Your gallbladder's about 534 00:13:11,956 --> 00:13:16,043 to burst. 535 00:13:16,085 --> 00:13:17,920 You know, 536 00:13:16,085 --> 00:13:17,920 Mickey, it's been, 537 00:13:16,085 --> 00:13:17,920 like, half an hour. 538 00:13:17,962 --> 00:13:19,798 I think we should 539 00:13:17,962 --> 00:13:19,798 go look for Lily. 540 00:13:17,962 --> 00:13:19,798 Nah. 541 00:13:19,839 --> 00:13:21,800 She just needs some 542 00:13:19,839 --> 00:13:21,800 time to cool down. 543 00:13:19,839 --> 00:13:21,800 Let's finish the game. 544 00:13:21,841 --> 00:13:24,009 Yeah, play another round. 545 00:13:21,841 --> 00:13:24,009 Best of seven! 546 00:13:24,051 --> 00:13:26,929 Damn it, Robin! 547 00:13:24,051 --> 00:13:26,929 I've known Barney 548 00:13:24,051 --> 00:13:26,929 the longest. 549 00:13:26,971 --> 00:13:28,389 I get to slap him. 550 00:13:28,431 --> 00:13:31,934 That slap is mine, Mosby. 551 00:13:28,431 --> 00:13:31,934 I've never slapped Barney 552 00:13:31,976 --> 00:13:34,520 above the waist. 553 00:13:34,562 --> 00:13:36,105 Look, 554 00:13:34,562 --> 00:13:36,105 I've wanted to slap Barney 555 00:13:34,562 --> 00:13:36,105 since the moment I met him! 556 00:13:36,147 --> 00:13:37,398 You don't think 557 00:13:36,147 --> 00:13:37,398 that I want to slap Barney? 558 00:13:37,440 --> 00:13:38,858 I've waited so... 559 00:13:38,899 --> 00:13:40,568 Wait, wait a minute. 560 00:13:38,899 --> 00:13:40,568 Wait a minute! 561 00:13:40,610 --> 00:13:43,613 This slap was supposed to 562 00:13:40,610 --> 00:13:43,613 be a wonderful thing, a gift, 563 00:13:43,655 --> 00:13:45,490 and look, it's turned 564 00:13:43,655 --> 00:13:45,490 us against each other. 565 00:13:46,491 --> 00:13:49,118 My God, you're right. 566 00:13:49,160 --> 00:13:52,204 This once 567 00:13:49,160 --> 00:13:52,204 pure fruit has turned 568 00:13:49,160 --> 00:13:52,204 into a poisoned slap-ple. 569 00:13:53,665 --> 00:13:55,834 You know what? 570 00:13:53,665 --> 00:13:55,834 Seriously, you take it. 571 00:13:55,875 --> 00:13:56,959 Are you sure? 572 00:13:57,001 --> 00:13:57,918 Slap-solutely. 573 00:14:00,004 --> 00:14:01,964 I really think that we 574 00:14:00,004 --> 00:14:01,964 should go look for Lily. 575 00:14:02,006 --> 00:14:05,092 Ted? Gallbladder about to pop. 576 00:14:05,134 --> 00:14:06,594 Okay, it's decided. 577 00:14:06,636 --> 00:14:09,096 Barney, come on. 578 00:14:06,636 --> 00:14:09,096 Get in the throne. 579 00:14:09,138 --> 00:14:10,973 Are you... 580 00:14:09,138 --> 00:14:10,973 Yep. Come on. 581 00:14:11,015 --> 00:14:12,975 Well, you... 582 00:14:13,017 --> 00:14:15,728 Well, I guess that is 583 00:14:13,017 --> 00:14:15,728 the best decision, Robin. 584 00:14:15,770 --> 00:14:18,648 I mean, men are 585 00:14:15,770 --> 00:14:18,648 stronger than women. 586 00:14:18,690 --> 00:14:20,232 Don't listen to him. 587 00:14:20,274 --> 00:14:22,234 Okay? It's been decided. 588 00:14:20,274 --> 00:14:22,234 Okay. 589 00:14:22,276 --> 00:14:24,821 I mean, that's what 590 00:14:22,276 --> 00:14:24,821 you've always wanted, 591 00:14:22,276 --> 00:14:24,821 isn't it, Robin? 592 00:14:24,863 --> 00:14:27,990 A strong man to 593 00:14:24,863 --> 00:14:27,990 take care of you? 594 00:14:28,032 --> 00:14:30,535 I mean, 595 00:14:28,032 --> 00:14:30,535 sure, growing up, 596 00:14:28,032 --> 00:14:30,535 you were a scrapper, 597 00:14:30,576 --> 00:14:34,789 playing hockey with the boys, 598 00:14:30,576 --> 00:14:34,789 skinning your knees on 599 00:14:30,576 --> 00:14:34,789 the ice. 600 00:14:34,831 --> 00:14:36,833 But what 601 00:14:34,831 --> 00:14:36,833 you couldn't 602 00:14:34,831 --> 00:14:36,833 tell your teammates, 603 00:14:36,875 --> 00:14:39,836 what you couldn't 604 00:14:36,875 --> 00:14:39,836 even tell yourself, 605 00:14:39,878 --> 00:14:44,924 was that 606 00:14:39,878 --> 00:14:44,924 all you really wanted 607 00:14:39,878 --> 00:14:44,924 was that pretty, white dress 608 00:14:44,965 --> 00:14:47,593 in that pretty, white chapel. 609 00:14:47,635 --> 00:14:50,012 And at the end of 610 00:14:47,635 --> 00:14:50,012 that center aisle, 611 00:14:50,054 --> 00:14:53,432 strewn with 612 00:14:50,054 --> 00:14:53,432 pretty, white flowers, 613 00:14:53,474 --> 00:14:57,311 a man, to do all of 614 00:14:53,474 --> 00:14:57,311 your slapping for you. 615 00:14:57,353 --> 00:14:58,646 Let me at him! 616 00:14:57,353 --> 00:14:58,646 Robin! Come on! 617 00:14:58,688 --> 00:15:00,022 Hold on! 618 00:15:00,064 --> 00:15:02,024 Whoa! 619 00:15:02,066 --> 00:15:04,652 Oh, my God. 620 00:15:02,066 --> 00:15:04,652 What just happened? 621 00:15:04,694 --> 00:15:08,781 Sorry, Ted. 622 00:15:04,694 --> 00:15:08,781 Gallbladder burst. 623 00:15:04,694 --> 00:15:08,781 You move back three spaces. 624 00:15:09,949 --> 00:15:11,784 You come in here, 625 00:15:11,826 --> 00:15:13,912 and you watch your 626 00:15:11,826 --> 00:15:13,912 daughter leave and 627 00:15:11,826 --> 00:15:13,912 you don't even care. 628 00:15:13,953 --> 00:15:16,748 And now 629 00:15:13,953 --> 00:15:16,748 you've destroyed 630 00:15:13,953 --> 00:15:16,748 Thanksgiving dinner! 631 00:15:16,789 --> 00:15:18,833 Lily worked 632 00:15:16,789 --> 00:15:18,833 all day on this! 633 00:15:18,875 --> 00:15:20,793 Relax. It's not real bile. 634 00:15:20,835 --> 00:15:23,379 It's just 635 00:15:20,835 --> 00:15:23,379 lead-based 636 00:15:20,835 --> 00:15:23,379 paint from China. 637 00:15:23,421 --> 00:15:25,590 And horse bile. 638 00:15:25,631 --> 00:15:27,967 And at that moment, 639 00:15:25,631 --> 00:15:27,967 Marshall gave Mickey a look 640 00:15:28,008 --> 00:15:31,596 none of us had ever 641 00:15:28,008 --> 00:15:31,596 seen him give anyone. 642 00:15:31,637 --> 00:15:33,013 What's this? 643 00:15:31,637 --> 00:15:33,013 What's he doing? 644 00:15:33,055 --> 00:15:34,599 Did you swallow 645 00:15:33,055 --> 00:15:34,599 some of that paint? 646 00:15:34,640 --> 00:15:37,059 This is my 647 00:15:34,640 --> 00:15:37,059 you're-dead-to-me look. 648 00:15:37,101 --> 00:15:38,937 Oh. 649 00:15:37,101 --> 00:15:38,937 Okay. 650 00:15:38,978 --> 00:15:40,229 Yeah, you know, 651 00:15:38,978 --> 00:15:40,229 Lily's is so much better... 652 00:15:40,271 --> 00:15:42,022 Get out of my house! 653 00:15:45,735 --> 00:15:46,819 Hey. 654 00:15:49,113 --> 00:15:51,699 Mr. Park's, huh? 655 00:15:49,113 --> 00:15:51,699 This is the last place 656 00:15:49,113 --> 00:15:51,699 I expected to find you. 657 00:15:51,741 --> 00:15:53,075 Marshall... 658 00:15:53,117 --> 00:15:56,078 Lily, I'm sorry. 659 00:15:53,117 --> 00:15:56,078 But just hear me out. 660 00:15:56,120 --> 00:15:59,081 I used to think 661 00:15:56,120 --> 00:15:59,081 that family was a right. 662 00:15:59,123 --> 00:16:01,960 But it's not. 663 00:15:59,123 --> 00:16:01,960 It's a privilege, 664 00:15:59,123 --> 00:16:01,960 and it has to be earned. 665 00:16:02,877 --> 00:16:04,796 I kicked your dad out. 666 00:16:04,837 --> 00:16:09,508 And I promise, baby, I will 667 00:16:04,837 --> 00:16:09,508 never make you see him again. 668 00:16:09,550 --> 00:16:12,094 Now what? Baby, 669 00:16:09,550 --> 00:16:12,094 what, what, what happened? 670 00:16:12,136 --> 00:16:15,055 Marshall, I came in here 671 00:16:12,136 --> 00:16:15,055 because it was cold 672 00:16:15,097 --> 00:16:16,975 and this was the only place 673 00:16:15,097 --> 00:16:16,975 that was open. 674 00:16:17,016 --> 00:16:19,602 I wasn't even gonna 675 00:16:17,016 --> 00:16:19,602 look Mr. Park in the eye. 676 00:16:20,352 --> 00:16:22,897 And then I found out 677 00:16:22,939 --> 00:16:24,064 Mr. Park died. 678 00:16:25,733 --> 00:16:27,109 Oh, my God. 679 00:16:27,151 --> 00:16:29,946 He really is dead to me. 680 00:16:29,988 --> 00:16:34,325 And if I feel this bad 681 00:16:29,988 --> 00:16:34,325 about never making up 682 00:16:29,988 --> 00:16:34,325 with Mr. Park, 683 00:16:34,366 --> 00:16:37,369 a guy who meant 684 00:16:34,366 --> 00:16:37,369 literally nothing to me, 685 00:16:41,165 --> 00:16:43,167 we gotta go get my dad. 686 00:16:43,208 --> 00:16:45,920 Okay. Here. 687 00:16:45,962 --> 00:16:48,339 So that's how 688 00:16:45,962 --> 00:16:48,339 on Thanksgiving, 2009, 689 00:16:48,380 --> 00:16:51,133 your Aunt Lily 690 00:16:48,380 --> 00:16:51,133 performed a miracle. 691 00:16:51,175 --> 00:16:53,302 She brought a man 692 00:16:51,175 --> 00:16:53,302 back from the dead. 693 00:16:54,512 --> 00:16:57,556 Everyone. 694 00:16:54,512 --> 00:16:57,556 Before we get started, 695 00:16:57,598 --> 00:17:03,187 Barney, we're going 696 00:16:57,598 --> 00:17:03,187 to need you on the 697 00:16:57,598 --> 00:17:03,187 slapping throne. 698 00:17:03,228 --> 00:17:06,148 Slap Bet Commissioner, 699 00:17:03,228 --> 00:17:06,148 surely tying me to 700 00:17:03,228 --> 00:17:06,148 a chair is a breach... 701 00:17:06,190 --> 00:17:08,108 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 702 00:17:06,190 --> 00:17:08,108 Less yapping, more slapping. 703 00:17:09,610 --> 00:17:11,737 Ted, Robin. It's two 704 00:17:09,610 --> 00:17:11,737 minutes until sundown. 705 00:17:11,779 --> 00:17:13,698 Have you 706 00:17:11,779 --> 00:17:13,698 guys decided 707 00:17:11,779 --> 00:17:13,698 which one of you is 708 00:17:13,739 --> 00:17:16,116 going to get to slap 709 00:17:13,739 --> 00:17:16,116 Barney right in his face? 710 00:17:18,202 --> 00:17:19,704 It's gonna be Ted. 711 00:17:19,745 --> 00:17:21,747 What? Why me? 712 00:17:21,789 --> 00:17:26,293 Last year, you got left at 713 00:17:21,789 --> 00:17:26,293 the altar. You lost your job. 714 00:17:26,335 --> 00:17:28,128 But you've come 715 00:17:26,335 --> 00:17:28,128 such a long way since then. 716 00:17:29,714 --> 00:17:32,174 I'm so proud of you, Ted. 717 00:17:32,216 --> 00:17:35,803 You deserve to slap someone 718 00:17:32,216 --> 00:17:35,803 in his face as hard 719 00:17:32,216 --> 00:17:35,803 as you can. 720 00:17:37,013 --> 00:17:38,180 Thanks. 721 00:17:38,222 --> 00:17:39,139 Oh, this is the worst. 722 00:17:46,605 --> 00:17:48,482 Mama! 723 00:17:48,524 --> 00:17:52,695 No, Robin. 724 00:17:48,524 --> 00:17:52,695 Look. You just went 725 00:17:48,524 --> 00:17:52,695 through your own breakup, 726 00:17:52,737 --> 00:17:54,822 and while I 727 00:17:52,737 --> 00:17:54,822 know you and Barney 728 00:17:52,737 --> 00:17:54,822 left it on good terms, 729 00:17:54,864 --> 00:17:59,284 isn't there some 730 00:17:54,864 --> 00:17:59,284 part of you, deep down, 731 00:17:54,864 --> 00:17:59,284 that wants to slap him 732 00:17:59,326 --> 00:18:00,327 right in his face? 733 00:18:01,495 --> 00:18:02,538 There is. 734 00:18:02,580 --> 00:18:03,748 I know there is. 735 00:18:03,789 --> 00:18:05,165 This is 736 00:18:03,789 --> 00:18:05,165 basically 737 00:18:03,789 --> 00:18:05,165 hell on Earth. 738 00:18:08,794 --> 00:18:10,212 All right. 739 00:18:11,130 --> 00:18:13,215 Don't. 740 00:18:13,257 --> 00:18:14,299 You got this. 741 00:18:14,341 --> 00:18:16,094 It hurts! 742 00:18:16,135 --> 00:18:18,220 No. I can't do it. 743 00:18:18,262 --> 00:18:20,180 I can't take 744 00:18:18,262 --> 00:18:20,180 this from you, Ted. 745 00:18:20,222 --> 00:18:21,223 Nor I, you. 746 00:18:21,265 --> 00:18:23,101 Thank God. 747 00:18:23,142 --> 00:18:26,104 So, I'd like to 748 00:18:23,142 --> 00:18:26,104 make a gesture. 749 00:18:23,142 --> 00:18:26,104 Mickey? 750 00:18:26,145 --> 00:18:28,230 Oh, no way! 751 00:18:28,272 --> 00:18:31,109 I'm glad you and Lily 752 00:18:28,272 --> 00:18:31,109 are trying to work 753 00:18:28,272 --> 00:18:31,109 things out. 754 00:18:31,150 --> 00:18:34,904 So, to welcome you 755 00:18:31,150 --> 00:18:34,904 to our little family, 756 00:18:34,946 --> 00:18:36,655 I'd like to 757 00:18:34,946 --> 00:18:36,655 offer you this slap. 758 00:18:36,697 --> 00:18:38,282 Really? 759 00:18:39,992 --> 00:18:42,120 Well, I feel 760 00:18:39,992 --> 00:18:42,120 a little weird. 761 00:18:42,161 --> 00:18:45,497 I just met Barney and I don't 762 00:18:42,161 --> 00:18:45,497 have anything against the guy. 763 00:18:45,539 --> 00:18:49,752 But how often do you get 764 00:18:45,539 --> 00:18:49,752 a chance to slap someone 765 00:18:45,539 --> 00:18:49,752 right in his face? 766 00:18:56,216 --> 00:18:57,217 Soft! 767 00:18:58,844 --> 00:19:00,220 I'm sorry. 768 00:18:58,844 --> 00:19:00,220 I can't do it. 769 00:19:00,262 --> 00:19:01,722 Thank God. 770 00:19:01,764 --> 00:19:04,058 Lily, 771 00:19:04,100 --> 00:19:05,684 I know I haven't been 772 00:19:04,100 --> 00:19:05,684 much of a father to you. 773 00:19:05,726 --> 00:19:08,270 You are kidding me. 774 00:19:08,312 --> 00:19:11,649 So, for all the ballet 775 00:19:08,312 --> 00:19:11,649 recitals that I missed, 776 00:19:11,690 --> 00:19:15,319 for all the art shows 777 00:19:11,690 --> 00:19:15,319 that I should've been at, 778 00:19:15,360 --> 00:19:19,073 for the wedding 779 00:19:15,360 --> 00:19:19,073 gift that I never got 780 00:19:15,360 --> 00:19:19,073 a chance to give to you, 781 00:19:19,115 --> 00:19:23,744 princess, I give 782 00:19:19,115 --> 00:19:23,744 this slap to you. 783 00:19:23,786 --> 00:19:24,912 Oh, Daddy! 784 00:19:25,788 --> 00:19:28,290 No. No, no, no, no. 785 00:19:28,332 --> 00:19:29,667 She is the Slap 786 00:19:28,332 --> 00:19:29,667 Bet Commissioner. 787 00:19:29,708 --> 00:19:31,502 She's supposed 788 00:19:29,708 --> 00:19:31,502 to remain impartial! 789 00:19:31,543 --> 00:19:33,587 Slap Bet Commissioner 790 00:19:31,543 --> 00:19:33,587 says it's okay. 791 00:19:34,713 --> 00:19:36,674 This is not good. 792 00:19:36,715 --> 00:19:38,342 Okay. 793 00:19:38,383 --> 00:19:40,552 Please, please, please. 794 00:19:38,383 --> 00:19:40,552 Let me, let me, let... 795 00:19:38,383 --> 00:19:40,552 Shh. 796 00:19:40,594 --> 00:19:42,680 Just close your eyes. 797 00:19:40,594 --> 00:19:42,680 It'll be over soon. 798 00:19:44,932 --> 00:19:47,434 Running through a meadow. 799 00:19:47,476 --> 00:19:50,771 I can't do it. 800 00:19:47,476 --> 00:19:50,771 Why can't I do it? 801 00:19:50,813 --> 00:19:55,943 Because this slap has done 802 00:19:50,813 --> 00:19:55,943 exactly what I hoped. 803 00:19:55,985 --> 00:19:57,778 It's brought us 804 00:19:55,985 --> 00:19:57,778 all closer together. 805 00:19:57,820 --> 00:20:01,657 And it's caused us to 806 00:19:57,820 --> 00:20:01,657 recognize both the frailty 807 00:20:01,699 --> 00:20:05,953 and the greatness in 808 00:20:01,699 --> 00:20:05,953 ourselves and each other. 809 00:20:05,995 --> 00:20:07,329 Oh, give me a break. 810 00:20:08,372 --> 00:20:09,748 And that is why 811 00:20:11,458 --> 00:20:15,337 there will be no slap today. 812 00:20:17,339 --> 00:20:19,341 Oh, my God! 813 00:20:19,383 --> 00:20:20,926 This is the best 814 00:20:19,383 --> 00:20:20,926 Thanksgiving... 815 00:20:23,137 --> 00:20:24,930 That's four! 816 00:20:24,972 --> 00:20:26,224 So, turkey? 817 00:20:32,104 --> 00:20:35,524 New from 818 00:20:32,104 --> 00:20:35,524 Aldrin Games Unlimited, 819 00:20:32,104 --> 00:20:35,524 it's Slap Bet, 820 00:20:35,566 --> 00:20:38,318 the slap-happy game 821 00:20:35,566 --> 00:20:38,318 that's a real hit. 822 00:20:43,532 --> 00:20:45,534 my friend 823 00:20:45,576 --> 00:20:46,660 For kids of all ages. 824 00:20:48,328 --> 00:20:51,415 just happened 825 00:20:54,752 --> 00:20:57,255 laughed and clapped 826 00:20:58,172 --> 00:21:00,049 I win! 827 00:21:01,425 --> 00:21:03,427 Slap yourself silly 828 00:21:01,425 --> 00:21:03,427 with Slap Bet, 829 00:21:03,468 --> 00:21:05,304 the happy hitting game 830 00:21:03,468 --> 00:21:05,304 from Aldrin. 831 00:21:30,454 --> 00:21:31,371 ENGLISH - US - LINE 21