1
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Kids,

2
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when you're in your 30s

3
00:00:02,313 --> 00:00:03,940
and live in New York,

4
00:00:03,982 --> 00:00:06,235
there's a few places

5
00:00:03,982 --> 00:00:06,235
you just never want to be.

6
00:00:06,276 --> 00:00:08,028
Times Square on

7
00:00:06,276 --> 00:00:08,028
New Year's Eve.

8
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Rockefeller Center

9
00:00:08,070 --> 00:00:10,030
around Christmastime.

10
00:00:10,072 --> 00:00:11,781
Yeah.

11
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But most of all...

12
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A college bar?

13
00:00:11,823 --> 00:00:15,368
Man, we're probably

14
00:00:11,823 --> 00:00:15,368
gonna run into my students.

15
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They're gonna corner me

16
00:00:15,410 --> 00:00:18,038
and want a free lecture.

17
00:00:18,080 --> 00:00:20,415
I don't even have

18
00:00:18,080 --> 00:00:20,415
my slide projector.

19
00:00:20,456 --> 00:00:23,376
Ted, I've been

20
00:00:20,456 --> 00:00:23,376
skee ball champ here

21
00:00:20,456 --> 00:00:23,376
since law school.

22
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I have to pop in

23
00:00:23,418 --> 00:00:26,379
at least once a month

24
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to maintain my record.

25
00:00:26,421 --> 00:00:28,715
Whoa, looks like

26
00:00:26,421 --> 00:00:28,715
you've been gone awhile.

27
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Some guy named Big Fudge

28
00:00:28,757 --> 00:00:31,009
has been cleaning up.

29
00:00:31,051 --> 00:00:32,635
Yeah, he has.

30
00:00:32,677 --> 00:00:34,137
And you're Big Fudge.

31
00:00:34,179 --> 00:00:37,390
The biggest.

32
00:00:37,432 --> 00:00:38,391
So, by the way,

33
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I have to tell

34
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you something.

35
00:00:38,433 --> 00:00:39,434
Yep.

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00:00:39,475 --> 00:00:41,978
I invited Jenkins.

37
00:00:42,020 --> 00:00:43,855
Jenkins? No way.

38
00:00:43,897 --> 00:00:47,192
We'd all started

39
00:00:43,897 --> 00:00:47,192
hearing about Jenkins

40
00:00:43,897 --> 00:00:47,192
a few weeks earlier.

41
00:00:47,234 --> 00:00:50,112
You guys will not believe

42
00:00:47,234 --> 00:00:50,112
what Jenkins did this time.

43
00:00:50,153 --> 00:00:51,905
Who's Jenkins?

44
00:00:51,947 --> 00:00:54,532
He's this

45
00:00:51,947 --> 00:00:54,532
hilarious new lawyer

46
00:00:51,947 --> 00:00:54,532
at Marshall's office.

47
00:00:54,574 --> 00:00:56,701
Hilarious!

48
00:00:56,743 --> 00:01:00,163
Okay, so, there's this jar

49
00:00:56,743 --> 00:01:00,163
of maraschino cherries in

50
00:00:56,743 --> 00:01:00,163
the fridge at work,

51
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so Jenkins says,

52
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"200 bucks,

53
00:01:02,582 --> 00:01:05,376
I'll eat the whole jar."

54
00:01:06,544 --> 00:01:08,546
So we give Jenkins

55
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200 bucks,

56
00:01:10,966 --> 00:01:12,425
and Jenkins ate

57
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the whole jar!

58
00:01:17,472 --> 00:01:19,641
Jenkins.

59
00:01:19,682 --> 00:01:21,517
And after that,

60
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the stories kept coming.

61
00:01:21,559 --> 00:01:24,062
So the CFO comes in

62
00:01:21,559 --> 00:01:24,062
to sign some

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acquisition papers.

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00:01:24,729 --> 00:01:26,439
So Jenkins goes,

65
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"Excuse me, Mr. Wilcox.

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00:01:26,481 --> 00:01:30,235
I think we forgot

67
00:01:26,481 --> 00:01:30,235
one of the documents."

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00:01:37,284 --> 00:01:39,911
Jenkins!

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00:01:39,953 --> 00:01:41,997
So we all go out

70
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for beers after work.

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00:01:42,038 --> 00:01:44,040
Jenkins gets up

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00:01:42,038 --> 00:01:44,040
on the table

73
00:01:44,082 --> 00:01:47,460
and starts gyrating

74
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like some sort of

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deranged stripper.

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00:01:47,502 --> 00:01:51,756
Next thing you know,

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00:01:47,502 --> 00:01:51,756
off comes the shirt.

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00:01:47,502 --> 00:01:51,756
It was so gross.

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Jenkins.

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Jenkins.

81
00:01:54,759 --> 00:01:56,803
Right?

82
00:01:56,845 --> 00:01:59,014
Well, it'll be great

83
00:01:56,845 --> 00:01:59,014
to finally meet

84
00:01:56,845 --> 00:01:59,014
the famous Jenkins

85
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after all those

86
00:01:59,055 --> 00:02:01,141
stories.

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00:01:59,055 --> 00:02:01,141
Yeah.

88
00:02:01,183 --> 00:02:04,769
And there's about

89
00:02:01,183 --> 00:02:04,769
to be one more story.

90
00:02:01,183 --> 00:02:04,769
I'm gonna bang Jenkins.

91
00:02:04,811 --> 00:02:06,896
What?

92
00:02:04,811 --> 00:02:06,896
You heard me.

93
00:02:06,938 --> 00:02:09,607
You want to have

94
00:02:06,938 --> 00:02:09,607
sex with Jenkins?

95
00:02:09,649 --> 00:02:12,527
With Jenkins, on Jenkins,

96
00:02:09,649 --> 00:02:12,527
near Jenkins. You name it.

97
00:02:12,568 --> 00:02:15,822
I want to wear Jenkins

98
00:02:12,568 --> 00:02:15,822
like a sock.

99
00:02:15,864 --> 00:02:20,118
You... But you're...

100
00:02:15,864 --> 00:02:20,118
Haven't you all...

101
00:02:15,864 --> 00:02:20,118
I'm... Really?

102
00:02:20,160 --> 00:02:21,619
Hey, guys.

103
00:02:21,661 --> 00:02:22,829
Ted, this is Jenkins.

104
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Oh!

105
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Look, this is gonna

106
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sound crazy,

107
00:02:41,139 --> 00:02:43,933
but I thought

108
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Jenkins was a guy.

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00:02:43,975 --> 00:02:46,602
What? That's crazy.

110
00:02:43,975 --> 00:02:46,602
What gave you that idea?

111
00:02:46,644 --> 00:02:49,814
I don't know, maybe

112
00:02:46,644 --> 00:02:49,814
the whole Jenkins-peed-out-

113
00:02:46,644 --> 00:02:49,814
the-window-of-a-cab story.

114
00:02:49,856 --> 00:02:51,191
Yeah. Much more

115
00:02:49,856 --> 00:02:51,191
impressive now,

116
00:02:49,856 --> 00:02:51,191
isn't it?

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00:02:51,233 --> 00:02:52,401
Yeah!

118
00:02:52,442 --> 00:02:54,610
Okay, I'll come clean!

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00:02:54,652 --> 00:02:56,988
It all started

120
00:02:54,652 --> 00:02:56,988
a few weeks ago.

121
00:02:57,030 --> 00:02:58,573
By the way, four eyes,

122
00:02:57,030 --> 00:02:58,573
new lawyer.

123
00:02:58,614 --> 00:03:00,158
This is Jenkins.

124
00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:02,327
Watch out for this guy.

125
00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:02,327
He steals stuff.

126
00:03:02,369 --> 00:03:03,786
I don't steal stuff.

127
00:03:04,954 --> 00:03:06,622
And I don't wear glasses.

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00:03:08,250 --> 00:03:09,376
I'm Marshall.

129
00:03:09,418 --> 00:03:10,543
Hi, Marshall.

130
00:03:10,585 --> 00:03:12,545
So, are you really

131
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a Vikings fan,

132
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or was he lying

133
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about that, too?

134
00:03:14,589 --> 00:03:17,300
Why? Is this a trap?

135
00:03:14,589 --> 00:03:17,300
Are you a Packers fan?

136
00:03:17,342 --> 00:03:19,802
My wife knows I'm here.

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00:03:17,342 --> 00:03:19,802
She doesn't have money,

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00:03:19,844 --> 00:03:22,555
but what she does have

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00:03:19,844 --> 00:03:22,555
is a very special set

140
00:03:19,844 --> 00:03:22,555
of skills.

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00:03:22,597 --> 00:03:25,558
I'm a Vikings fan, too.

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I bleed purple and gold.

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00:03:25,600 --> 00:03:26,976
I'm from Pelican Rapids!

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Pelican Rapids? No way!

145
00:03:27,018 --> 00:03:29,438
Yeah.

146
00:03:29,479 --> 00:03:31,564
My grandpa lives

147
00:03:29,479 --> 00:03:31,564
in Pelican Rapids.

148
00:03:31,606 --> 00:03:32,565
Well, I mean,

149
00:03:31,606 --> 00:03:32,565
he's dead now,

150
00:03:32,607 --> 00:03:34,192
but he haunts a barn

151
00:03:32,607 --> 00:03:34,192
off Route 108.

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00:03:35,402 --> 00:03:37,695
Whoa! Hold it. Hold it.

153
00:03:37,737 --> 00:03:39,906
Dude, if you tell me you

154
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have a thing for a woman

155
00:03:37,737 --> 00:03:39,906
that is not your wife,

156
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I will drag you outside

157
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and kick your ass.

158
00:03:42,367 --> 00:03:45,536
Okay, first of all,

159
00:03:42,367 --> 00:03:45,536
come on, buddy.

160
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You can't handle

161
00:03:45,578 --> 00:03:47,538
the Fudge.

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00:03:47,580 --> 00:03:51,584
Second of all, no,

163
00:03:47,580 --> 00:03:51,584
I think of her

164
00:03:47,580 --> 00:03:51,584
like a big brother,

165
00:03:51,626 --> 00:03:53,586
who, I guess,

166
00:03:51,626 --> 00:03:53,586
has boobs.

167
00:03:53,628 --> 00:03:55,922
But so does

168
00:03:53,628 --> 00:03:55,922
my oldest brother,

169
00:03:53,628 --> 00:03:55,922
Marvin Jr. Anyway,

170
00:03:55,964 --> 00:03:57,590
that night,

171
00:03:55,964 --> 00:03:57,590
I told Lily about...

172
00:03:57,632 --> 00:03:59,759
Jenkins.

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I can't wait

174
00:03:59,801 --> 00:04:02,011
to meet him.

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00:04:02,053 --> 00:04:05,598
I should have corrected her.

176
00:04:02,053 --> 00:04:05,598
It would have been so easy.

177
00:04:05,640 --> 00:04:07,517
But I didn't.

178
00:04:07,558 --> 00:04:09,685
So, after that, whenever

179
00:04:07,558 --> 00:04:09,685
I talked about Jenkins,

180
00:04:09,727 --> 00:04:12,647
I always avoided pronouns.

181
00:04:12,688 --> 00:04:15,900
So the head of marketing

182
00:04:12,688 --> 00:04:15,900
comes in to choose people

183
00:04:12,688 --> 00:04:15,900
for the mid-west audit.

184
00:04:15,942 --> 00:04:19,821
So he goes, him,

185
00:04:15,942 --> 00:04:19,821
him, her, him, him,

186
00:04:21,114 --> 00:04:23,408
Jenkins, him, her...

187
00:04:23,450 --> 00:04:25,494
I don't understand

188
00:04:23,450 --> 00:04:25,494
why you wouldn't

189
00:04:23,450 --> 00:04:25,494
just tell Lily.

190
00:04:25,535 --> 00:04:26,995
Do you really think

191
00:04:25,535 --> 00:04:26,995
she'd be all that jealous?

192
00:04:27,036 --> 00:04:29,580
Ted, think about

193
00:04:27,036 --> 00:04:29,580
those stories I told you.

194
00:04:45,388 --> 00:04:47,265
Yeah, I could see

195
00:04:45,388 --> 00:04:47,265
how that'd be a problem.

196
00:04:47,307 --> 00:04:49,642
Exactly. That's why

197
00:04:47,307 --> 00:04:49,642
Lily can't find out.

198
00:04:49,684 --> 00:04:51,269
Lily can't

199
00:04:49,684 --> 00:04:51,269
find out what?

200
00:04:51,311 --> 00:04:53,980
That Marshall's gonna

201
00:04:51,311 --> 00:04:53,980
buy her a horse.

202
00:04:54,022 --> 00:04:57,608
You are?

203
00:04:54,022 --> 00:04:57,608
That is so awesome!

204
00:04:54,022 --> 00:04:57,608
I love those things!

205
00:05:00,695 --> 00:05:03,614
Guys, why is

206
00:05:00,695 --> 00:05:03,614
that kid over there

207
00:05:00,695 --> 00:05:03,614
staring at me?

208
00:05:04,991 --> 00:05:07,118
I think I know

209
00:05:04,991 --> 00:05:07,118
what this is.

210
00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:09,787
I think it has

211
00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:09,787
finally happened.

212
00:05:09,829 --> 00:05:12,374
I'm getting recognized

213
00:05:09,829 --> 00:05:12,374
from my show.

214
00:05:12,415 --> 00:05:15,668
Robin, that is so cute.

215
00:05:15,710 --> 00:05:18,838
But that's Scotty.

216
00:05:15,710 --> 00:05:18,838
He's one of my students,

217
00:05:15,710 --> 00:05:18,838
and he's looking at me.

218
00:05:18,880 --> 00:05:21,341
How weird is it

219
00:05:18,880 --> 00:05:21,341
that I'm more

220
00:05:18,880 --> 00:05:21,341
famous than you?

221
00:05:21,383 --> 00:05:24,469
Not at all,

222
00:05:21,383 --> 00:05:24,469
'cause you're not.

223
00:05:21,383 --> 00:05:24,469
I'm on TV.

224
00:05:24,511 --> 00:05:26,179
Yeah, and I have 30

225
00:05:24,511 --> 00:05:26,179
students in my class.

226
00:05:26,221 --> 00:05:28,931
That's what,

227
00:05:26,221 --> 00:05:28,931
30 times your viewership?

228
00:05:28,973 --> 00:05:30,683
Now let's give Scotty

229
00:05:28,973 --> 00:05:30,683
a little thrill.

230
00:05:30,725 --> 00:05:33,769
Buying a drink

231
00:05:30,725 --> 00:05:33,769
for the old prof.

232
00:05:33,811 --> 00:05:37,190
All right, Scotter,

233
00:05:33,811 --> 00:05:37,190
one question about

234
00:05:33,811 --> 00:05:37,190
neo-classical architecture

235
00:05:37,232 --> 00:05:39,317
and that is it.

236
00:05:37,232 --> 00:05:39,317
You're Robin Scherbatsky,

237
00:05:37,232 --> 00:05:39,317
right?

238
00:05:39,359 --> 00:05:41,694
What?

239
00:05:39,359 --> 00:05:41,694
Yes, I am.

240
00:05:41,736 --> 00:05:44,072
Wow! Look,

241
00:05:41,736 --> 00:05:44,072
I didn't mean to stare.

242
00:05:44,113 --> 00:05:47,576
It's just... I watch

243
00:05:44,113 --> 00:05:47,576
your show all the time.

244
00:05:47,617 --> 00:05:49,702
Really?

245
00:05:47,617 --> 00:05:49,702
Really?

246
00:05:49,744 --> 00:05:50,745
Totally!

247
00:05:52,747 --> 00:05:54,457
What are you doing out

248
00:05:52,747 --> 00:05:54,457
with Ted?

249
00:05:54,499 --> 00:05:55,917
It's Professor Mosby.

250
00:05:55,958 --> 00:05:57,586
We're friends.

251
00:05:57,627 --> 00:06:01,590
Holy crap!

252
00:05:57,627 --> 00:06:01,590
Robin Scherbatsky's friends

253
00:05:57,627 --> 00:06:01,590
with my econ professor!

254
00:06:01,631 --> 00:06:03,550
It's architecture!

255
00:06:03,592 --> 00:06:07,303
All right, you know what,

256
00:06:03,592 --> 00:06:07,303
Scotty, you're crowding us.

257
00:06:03,592 --> 00:06:07,303
Hit the bricks.

258
00:06:07,345 --> 00:06:08,304
Wait a minute.

259
00:06:07,345 --> 00:06:08,304
You're Big Fudge!

260
00:06:08,346 --> 00:06:09,514
Go!

261
00:06:12,642 --> 00:06:14,310
Hello?

262
00:06:12,642 --> 00:06:14,310
Hey, baby,

263
00:06:12,642 --> 00:06:14,310
I'm on my way up.

264
00:06:15,019 --> 00:06:17,480
What? Why?

265
00:06:17,522 --> 00:06:19,732
There was a measles outbreak

266
00:06:17,522 --> 00:06:19,732
at school and they called

267
00:06:17,522 --> 00:06:19,732
a half-day.

268
00:06:19,774 --> 00:06:23,736
Thought I'd come by here,

269
00:06:19,774 --> 00:06:23,736
have lunch, maybe give you

270
00:06:19,774 --> 00:06:23,736
the measles?

271
00:06:23,778 --> 00:06:25,738
Okay.

272
00:06:25,780 --> 00:06:29,325
Um. I have a problem.

273
00:06:25,780 --> 00:06:29,325
That was my wife.

274
00:06:29,367 --> 00:06:31,744
When I first mentioned you,

275
00:06:29,367 --> 00:06:31,744
she mistakenly thought

276
00:06:29,367 --> 00:06:31,744
you were a guy,

277
00:06:31,786 --> 00:06:34,247
and so...

278
00:06:31,786 --> 00:06:34,247
So now you're worried

279
00:06:34,289 --> 00:06:36,124
that once she finds out

280
00:06:34,289 --> 00:06:36,124
I'm a woman, she's gonna

281
00:06:34,289 --> 00:06:36,124
totally flip out.

282
00:06:36,165 --> 00:06:37,459
Yes, exactly.

283
00:06:37,500 --> 00:06:39,294
Oh, jeez. Oh, gosh.

284
00:06:39,335 --> 00:06:41,754
Okay, okay.

285
00:06:39,335 --> 00:06:41,754
I was in an improv group

286
00:06:39,335 --> 00:06:41,754
in Pelican Rapids.

287
00:06:41,796 --> 00:06:44,507
Follow my lead.

288
00:06:41,796 --> 00:06:44,507
Okay.

289
00:06:44,549 --> 00:06:47,260
Lily!

290
00:06:44,549 --> 00:06:47,260
Hey, baby...

291
00:06:47,302 --> 00:06:49,971
Hi, I'm Lily,

292
00:06:47,302 --> 00:06:49,971
Marshall's wife.

293
00:06:50,012 --> 00:06:52,557
Hi, Lily. I'm from

294
00:06:50,012 --> 00:06:52,557
the French Embassy.

295
00:06:52,599 --> 00:06:56,352
I'm here because of a small

296
00:06:52,599 --> 00:06:56,352
but significant cheese

297
00:06:52,599 --> 00:06:56,352
incident that occurred.

298
00:06:56,394 --> 00:06:57,728
She's Jenkins!

299
00:07:04,486 --> 00:07:06,321
You're Jenkins?

300
00:07:06,362 --> 00:07:10,116
Yeah, well, that

301
00:07:06,362 --> 00:07:10,116
Camembert crisis isn't

302
00:07:06,362 --> 00:07:10,116
gonna resolve itself,

303
00:07:10,158 --> 00:07:12,661
so I'll catch you guys

304
00:07:10,158 --> 00:07:12,661
on the flip-flop.

305
00:07:12,702 --> 00:07:13,869
Marshall cringed.

306
00:07:13,911 --> 00:07:15,580
This was the moment

307
00:07:13,911 --> 00:07:15,580
he had feared.

308
00:07:15,622 --> 00:07:18,541
The famous Jenkins!

309
00:07:15,622 --> 00:07:18,541
How about that?

310
00:07:18,583 --> 00:07:22,795
Funny, I was

311
00:07:18,583 --> 00:07:22,795
picturing a guy.

312
00:07:18,583 --> 00:07:22,795
Anyhoo, lunch?

313
00:07:22,837 --> 00:07:25,923
Wait.

314
00:07:22,837 --> 00:07:25,923
So you're not

315
00:07:22,837 --> 00:07:25,923
jealous at all?

316
00:07:25,965 --> 00:07:30,845
Sweetie, I never

317
00:07:25,965 --> 00:07:30,845
have to worry about you

318
00:07:25,965 --> 00:07:30,845
with another woman.

319
00:07:30,886 --> 00:07:33,014
Right, well, 'cause

320
00:07:30,886 --> 00:07:33,014
we're so hopelessly

321
00:07:30,886 --> 00:07:33,014
in love, right?

322
00:07:33,055 --> 00:07:35,684
Yeah, sure.

323
00:07:33,055 --> 00:07:35,684
Anyhoo, lunch?

324
00:07:37,935 --> 00:07:39,354
She wasn't jealous at all!

325
00:07:39,395 --> 00:07:40,896
Of course

326
00:07:39,395 --> 00:07:40,896
she wasn't jealous.

327
00:07:40,938 --> 00:07:43,566
That's the whole dynamic

328
00:07:40,938 --> 00:07:43,566
of your relationship.

329
00:07:43,608 --> 00:07:44,775
What's that

330
00:07:43,608 --> 00:07:44,775
supposed to mean?

331
00:07:44,817 --> 00:07:46,152
Well, it's like this,

332
00:07:44,817 --> 00:07:46,152
my man.

333
00:07:46,194 --> 00:07:49,822
Every good relationship

334
00:07:46,194 --> 00:07:49,822
has a reacher and a settler.

335
00:07:49,864 --> 00:07:52,867
Exactly. One person

336
00:07:49,864 --> 00:07:52,867
reaches for someone

337
00:07:49,864 --> 00:07:52,867
out of their league,

338
00:07:52,908 --> 00:07:55,828
the other one settles

339
00:07:52,908 --> 00:07:55,828
for someone below theirs.

340
00:07:55,870 --> 00:07:58,247
I did not settle for Lily.

341
00:07:58,289 --> 00:08:00,542
Okay, yes,

342
00:07:58,289 --> 00:08:00,542
she's a little short,

343
00:08:00,583 --> 00:08:06,297
and true, my mom says she

344
00:08:00,583 --> 00:08:06,297
doesn't have the hips to birth

345
00:08:00,583 --> 00:08:06,297
an Eriksen child, but it...

346
00:08:06,339 --> 00:08:07,840
Oh, my God,

347
00:08:06,339 --> 00:08:07,840
you guys think

348
00:08:06,339 --> 00:08:07,840
I'm the reacher.

349
00:08:07,882 --> 00:08:09,718
That's why

350
00:08:07,882 --> 00:08:09,718
Lily's not jealous.

351
00:08:09,759 --> 00:08:11,844
The settler is never

352
00:08:09,759 --> 00:08:11,844
jealous of the reacher

353
00:08:11,886 --> 00:08:14,847
because where's

354
00:08:11,886 --> 00:08:14,847
the reacher gonna go?

355
00:08:14,889 --> 00:08:18,476
The settler, Lily, is the

356
00:08:14,889 --> 00:08:18,476
best thing that the reacher,

357
00:08:14,889 --> 00:08:18,476
Marshall, is ever gonna get.

358
00:08:18,518 --> 00:08:21,563
No! Okay, yes,

359
00:08:18,518 --> 00:08:21,563
I'm lucky to have Lily,

360
00:08:21,604 --> 00:08:25,692
but Lily is just

361
00:08:21,604 --> 00:08:25,692
as lucky to have me!

362
00:08:25,734 --> 00:08:27,860
Okay? Neither one of us

363
00:08:25,734 --> 00:08:27,860
is the reacher.

364
00:08:27,902 --> 00:08:31,322
Dude, you are so the reacher.

365
00:08:27,902 --> 00:08:31,322
You're getting her a horse.

366
00:08:33,575 --> 00:08:35,034
What?

367
00:08:35,076 --> 00:08:36,452
Shh. Take the hit.

368
00:08:35,076 --> 00:08:36,452
Take the hit.

369
00:08:39,706 --> 00:08:43,209
Thus ending

370
00:08:39,706 --> 00:08:43,209
modern architecture's

371
00:08:39,706 --> 00:08:43,209
very brief experiment

372
00:08:43,251 --> 00:08:44,835
with the V-frame house.

373
00:08:47,255 --> 00:08:51,426
Um. Excuse me for a second.

374
00:08:47,255 --> 00:08:51,426
What are you doing here?

375
00:08:51,467 --> 00:08:53,762
I noticed

376
00:08:51,467 --> 00:08:53,762
you forgot something

377
00:08:51,467 --> 00:08:53,762
this morning,

378
00:08:53,803 --> 00:08:55,137
so I thought

379
00:08:53,803 --> 00:08:55,137
I'd bring it by.

380
00:08:55,179 --> 00:08:56,305
Your pen.

381
00:08:56,347 --> 00:08:57,848
This is your pen.

382
00:08:57,890 --> 00:09:00,017
And you chewed on the end

383
00:08:57,890 --> 00:09:00,017
of this recently.

384
00:09:00,059 --> 00:09:01,894
Not a problem, Ted.

385
00:09:01,936 --> 00:09:03,479
Your class was on

386
00:09:01,936 --> 00:09:03,479
my way to work...

387
00:09:01,936 --> 00:09:03,479
No, it's not.

388
00:09:03,521 --> 00:09:05,481
at Come On,

389
00:09:03,521 --> 00:09:05,481
Get Up, New York,

390
00:09:05,523 --> 00:09:06,982
where I'm an anchor, so...

391
00:09:07,024 --> 00:09:09,110
I watch your show

392
00:09:07,024 --> 00:09:09,110
all the time.

393
00:09:10,319 --> 00:09:13,197
What? You watch the show?

394
00:09:13,239 --> 00:09:16,284
Oh! Well, paint me flattered!

395
00:09:13,239 --> 00:09:16,284
Any other fans out there?

396
00:09:16,325 --> 00:09:17,910
Oh! We got...

397
00:09:16,325 --> 00:09:17,910
Okay, all right.

398
00:09:17,952 --> 00:09:19,036
Thanks for

399
00:09:17,952 --> 00:09:19,036
coming by, Robin.

400
00:09:19,078 --> 00:09:20,246
Well, tune in tonight.

401
00:09:20,288 --> 00:09:22,707
I'm doing a great piece

402
00:09:20,288 --> 00:09:22,707
on snail poison.

403
00:09:24,959 --> 00:09:27,545
Also, who's got

404
00:09:24,959 --> 00:09:27,545
the worst pizza

405
00:09:24,959 --> 00:09:27,545
in New York?

406
00:09:27,587 --> 00:09:32,925
I'll give you the answer

407
00:09:27,587 --> 00:09:32,925
after traffic on the ones,

408
00:09:27,587 --> 00:09:32,925
threes, fives, and nines.

409
00:09:32,967 --> 00:09:35,553
Really? You guys

410
00:09:32,967 --> 00:09:35,553
watch her show?

411
00:09:35,595 --> 00:09:38,931
It's like watching

412
00:09:35,595 --> 00:09:38,931
a well-lit aquarium,

413
00:09:35,595 --> 00:09:38,931
but not as interesting.

414
00:09:38,973 --> 00:09:40,933
And now that I

415
00:09:38,973 --> 00:09:40,933
think about it,

416
00:09:38,973 --> 00:09:40,933
not as well lit.

417
00:09:40,975 --> 00:09:44,729
Well, the truth is,

418
00:09:40,975 --> 00:09:44,729
we watch it for

419
00:09:40,975 --> 00:09:44,729
the drinking game.

420
00:09:44,771 --> 00:09:46,439
The who now?

421
00:09:46,481 --> 00:09:48,274
Her morning show

422
00:09:46,481 --> 00:09:48,274
comes on so early

423
00:09:48,316 --> 00:09:50,025
we're usually

424
00:09:48,316 --> 00:09:50,025
still at the bar,

425
00:09:50,067 --> 00:09:51,944
so whenever she

426
00:09:50,067 --> 00:09:51,944
does an interview,

427
00:09:51,986 --> 00:09:54,905
you have to drink

428
00:09:51,986 --> 00:09:54,905
every time she says

429
00:09:51,986 --> 00:09:54,905
"but, um."

430
00:09:56,324 --> 00:09:58,618
"But, um"?

431
00:09:56,324 --> 00:09:58,618
"But, um."

432
00:09:58,660 --> 00:10:01,245
Apparently,

433
00:09:58,660 --> 00:10:01,245
she says it a lot.

434
00:10:01,287 --> 00:10:03,956
It's funny.

435
00:10:01,287 --> 00:10:03,956
I had a drinking game

436
00:10:01,287 --> 00:10:03,956
based on Robin,

437
00:10:03,998 --> 00:10:05,958
but it was

438
00:10:03,998 --> 00:10:05,958
actually on Robin.

439
00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:07,418
I'd pour Peach Schnapps

440
00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:07,418
in her bellybutton...

441
00:10:07,460 --> 00:10:08,503
Dude, we agreed

442
00:10:07,460 --> 00:10:08,503
we wouldn't do this.

443
00:10:08,544 --> 00:10:09,962
Sorry. You're right.

444
00:10:10,004 --> 00:10:12,923
She didn't like it anyway.

445
00:10:10,004 --> 00:10:12,923
Said it woke her up.

446
00:10:14,967 --> 00:10:17,637
Does she really say

447
00:10:14,967 --> 00:10:17,637
"but, um" that much?

448
00:10:17,679 --> 00:10:20,973
That night,

449
00:10:17,679 --> 00:10:20,973
we found out just

450
00:10:17,679 --> 00:10:20,973
how much she said it.

451
00:10:21,015 --> 00:10:22,433
That's great,

452
00:10:21,015 --> 00:10:22,433
but, um...

453
00:10:22,475 --> 00:10:23,726
"But, um."

454
00:10:22,475 --> 00:10:23,726
Nice.

455
00:10:23,768 --> 00:10:25,394
This wasn't your first

456
00:10:23,768 --> 00:10:25,394
spelling bee, was it?

457
00:10:25,436 --> 00:10:26,604
Nope. Third.

458
00:10:26,646 --> 00:10:29,482
Oh! Good for you,

459
00:10:26,646 --> 00:10:29,482
but, um...

460
00:10:29,524 --> 00:10:31,317
But, um.

461
00:10:29,524 --> 00:10:31,317
But, um.

462
00:10:31,359 --> 00:10:33,986
But, um...

463
00:10:31,359 --> 00:10:33,986
But, um... But, um...

464
00:10:31,359 --> 00:10:33,986
But, um... But, um...

465
00:10:34,028 --> 00:10:37,990
But, um... But, um...

466
00:10:34,028 --> 00:10:37,990
But, um... But, um...

467
00:10:34,028 --> 00:10:37,990
But, um... But, um...

468
00:10:47,500 --> 00:10:48,877
Hmm.

469
00:10:48,918 --> 00:10:51,713
Interesting article

470
00:10:48,918 --> 00:10:51,713
in the paper.

471
00:10:51,754 --> 00:10:54,924
Says that in every

472
00:10:51,754 --> 00:10:54,924
relationship there's

473
00:10:51,754 --> 00:10:54,924
a reacher and a settler.

474
00:10:54,965 --> 00:10:56,050
Really? Let me see it.

475
00:10:56,091 --> 00:10:58,302
It's not

476
00:10:56,091 --> 00:10:58,302
in this newspaper.

477
00:10:58,344 --> 00:11:00,012
It's in one

478
00:10:58,344 --> 00:11:00,012
I read awhile back.

479
00:11:00,054 --> 00:11:04,726
This newspaper reminded me

480
00:11:00,054 --> 00:11:04,726
of the other newspaper.

481
00:11:00,054 --> 00:11:04,726
Anyhoo...

482
00:11:04,767 --> 00:11:06,728
What do you think

483
00:11:04,767 --> 00:11:06,728
about that?

484
00:11:06,769 --> 00:11:08,979
Well, I guess sometimes

485
00:11:06,769 --> 00:11:08,979
that's the case.

486
00:11:10,231 --> 00:11:11,482
But not in ours.

487
00:11:11,524 --> 00:11:13,025
What? No, of course not.

488
00:11:13,067 --> 00:11:14,318
Right.

489
00:11:16,571 --> 00:11:20,241
Well, say,

490
00:11:16,571 --> 00:11:20,241
gun to your head,

491
00:11:20,282 --> 00:11:24,036
you had to say

492
00:11:20,282 --> 00:11:24,036
one of us was

493
00:11:20,282 --> 00:11:24,036
the reacher.

494
00:11:24,078 --> 00:11:28,040
Well, I'd say it's neither.

495
00:11:24,078 --> 00:11:28,040
That's what makes us great.

496
00:11:28,082 --> 00:11:31,586
Okay, now,

497
00:11:28,082 --> 00:11:31,586
there's a gun

498
00:11:28,082 --> 00:11:31,586
to my head,

499
00:11:31,627 --> 00:11:34,296
and our future children,

500
00:11:31,627 --> 00:11:34,296
and our future cat or monkey,

501
00:11:34,338 --> 00:11:35,882
depending on who wins

502
00:11:34,338 --> 00:11:35,882
the game of Risk

503
00:11:35,924 --> 00:11:37,884
we've been playing

504
00:11:35,924 --> 00:11:37,884
for three years.

505
00:11:37,926 --> 00:11:40,511
Nope. No reacher,

506
00:11:37,926 --> 00:11:40,511
no settler.

507
00:11:40,553 --> 00:11:42,221
Mmm. Mmm.

508
00:11:43,973 --> 00:11:45,391
Well, how about this...

509
00:11:45,433 --> 00:11:46,851
This went on for a while.

510
00:11:48,102 --> 00:11:50,271
Until finally...

511
00:11:50,312 --> 00:11:55,234
Our two kids,

512
00:11:50,312 --> 00:11:55,234
our eight grandkids,

513
00:11:50,312 --> 00:11:55,234
our 11 great-grandkids

514
00:11:55,276 --> 00:11:59,238
are all on a plane

515
00:11:55,276 --> 00:11:59,238
piloted by Oprah,

516
00:11:59,280 --> 00:12:02,074
and it's about to crash

517
00:11:59,280 --> 00:12:02,074
into an art museum

518
00:12:02,116 --> 00:12:03,910
with all of your

519
00:12:02,116 --> 00:12:03,910
favorite paintings,

520
00:12:03,952 --> 00:12:06,495
and the only way,

521
00:12:03,952 --> 00:12:06,495
the only way to

522
00:12:03,952 --> 00:12:06,495
save everything,

523
00:12:06,537 --> 00:12:08,456
is just to answer

524
00:12:06,537 --> 00:12:08,456
the question.

525
00:12:08,497 --> 00:12:10,666
Are you the reacher

526
00:12:08,497 --> 00:12:10,666
or the settler?

527
00:12:13,085 --> 00:12:14,378
And Oprah's

528
00:12:13,085 --> 00:12:14,378
tried everything?

529
00:12:14,420 --> 00:12:16,965
Everything!

530
00:12:14,420 --> 00:12:16,965
You have to decide now!

531
00:12:19,926 --> 00:12:23,554
Well, I guess

532
00:12:19,926 --> 00:12:23,554
if I had to say,

533
00:12:19,926 --> 00:12:23,554
then maybe I'd say

534
00:12:24,346 --> 00:12:25,640
I'm the settler.

535
00:12:25,681 --> 00:12:27,433
How could you say that?

536
00:12:27,475 --> 00:12:30,686
She thinks that

537
00:12:27,475 --> 00:12:30,686
she's the settler.

538
00:12:30,728 --> 00:12:35,065
I mean, that's it.

539
00:12:30,728 --> 00:12:35,065
I gotta prove to her

540
00:12:30,728 --> 00:12:35,065
that I am not the reacher.

541
00:12:35,107 --> 00:12:36,191
I gotta make

542
00:12:35,107 --> 00:12:36,191
her jealous.

543
00:12:36,233 --> 00:12:37,652
Well, that's easy.

544
00:12:36,233 --> 00:12:37,652
Here's the plan.

545
00:12:37,693 --> 00:12:39,988
Step one,

546
00:12:37,693 --> 00:12:39,988
sleep with Jenkins.

547
00:12:40,029 --> 00:12:42,156
Step two, I sleep

548
00:12:40,029 --> 00:12:42,156
with Jenkins first.

549
00:12:42,197 --> 00:12:44,158
Step three,

550
00:12:42,197 --> 00:12:44,158
we do step two first.

551
00:12:44,199 --> 00:12:46,410
I'm gonna go get

552
00:12:44,199 --> 00:12:46,410
started on step two.

553
00:12:47,870 --> 00:12:50,122
Okay, okay,

554
00:12:47,870 --> 00:12:50,122
I got something.

555
00:12:50,164 --> 00:12:51,624
Remember the other night,

556
00:12:50,164 --> 00:12:51,624
the skee ball game?

557
00:12:51,666 --> 00:12:53,459
When you were putting

558
00:12:51,666 --> 00:12:53,459
nothing but wood

559
00:12:51,666 --> 00:12:53,459
in the 50-hole?

560
00:12:53,501 --> 00:12:56,128
Whatever.

561
00:12:53,501 --> 00:12:56,128
Just another night

562
00:12:53,501 --> 00:12:56,128
for Big Fudge.

563
00:13:19,735 --> 00:13:21,153
You thought

564
00:13:19,735 --> 00:13:21,153
she was into me?

565
00:13:21,195 --> 00:13:24,114
Full-on lady wood.

566
00:13:24,156 --> 00:13:29,662
Yes. Of course.

567
00:13:24,156 --> 00:13:29,662
A plan taketh shape.

568
00:13:29,704 --> 00:13:35,084
If Lady Lily's jealousy

569
00:13:29,704 --> 00:13:35,084
young Marshall cannot budge,

570
00:13:35,125 --> 00:13:37,628
then perchance,

571
00:13:35,125 --> 00:13:37,628
fair gentles,

572
00:13:37,670 --> 00:13:42,174
Big Fudge can

573
00:13:37,670 --> 00:13:42,174
make her jealous.

574
00:13:42,216 --> 00:13:43,258
Okay, let me

575
00:13:42,216 --> 00:13:43,258
try that again.

576
00:13:43,300 --> 00:13:44,760
If Lady Lily...

577
00:13:44,802 --> 00:13:46,178
I got it, buddy.

578
00:13:44,802 --> 00:13:46,178
I got it.

579
00:13:48,681 --> 00:13:52,226
Ted, I have got

580
00:13:48,681 --> 00:13:52,226
a great idea.

581
00:13:52,267 --> 00:13:55,021
Is it clean your hair

582
00:13:52,267 --> 00:13:55,021
out of the shower drain

583
00:13:52,267 --> 00:13:55,021
when you're done?

584
00:13:55,063 --> 00:13:57,439
Seriously,

585
00:13:55,063 --> 00:13:57,439
it's like you're trying

586
00:13:55,063 --> 00:13:57,439
to carpet the tub.

587
00:13:57,481 --> 00:14:01,069
If you wanted to print out

588
00:13:57,481 --> 00:14:01,069
one of your lectures

589
00:13:57,481 --> 00:14:01,069
or something,

590
00:14:01,110 --> 00:14:06,198
I could read it on air.

591
00:14:01,110 --> 00:14:06,198
Coming from a more

592
00:14:01,110 --> 00:14:06,198
entertaining source,

593
00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:08,617
your students might

594
00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:08,617
actually pay attention

595
00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:08,617
and learn something.

596
00:14:08,659 --> 00:14:11,079
Oh! You're entertaining?

597
00:14:11,120 --> 00:14:13,039
Last night there

598
00:14:11,120 --> 00:14:13,039
was three minutes

599
00:14:11,120 --> 00:14:13,039
of dead air

600
00:14:13,081 --> 00:14:15,207
while you sewed a button

601
00:14:13,081 --> 00:14:15,207
back on your sweater.

602
00:14:15,249 --> 00:14:18,210
Look, just because

603
00:14:15,249 --> 00:14:18,210
your class likes me

604
00:14:15,249 --> 00:14:18,210
more than you...

605
00:14:18,252 --> 00:14:19,587
You're a drinking game!

606
00:14:19,628 --> 00:14:21,589
What?

607
00:14:21,630 --> 00:14:23,215
That's why they watch.

608
00:14:21,630 --> 00:14:23,215
They made a drinking game

609
00:14:21,630 --> 00:14:23,215
out of you.

610
00:14:23,257 --> 00:14:26,260
Every time

611
00:14:23,257 --> 00:14:26,260
you say "but, um,"

612
00:14:23,257 --> 00:14:26,260
they do a shot.

613
00:14:26,301 --> 00:14:28,637
"But, um"?

614
00:14:26,301 --> 00:14:28,637
Yeah.

615
00:14:28,679 --> 00:14:31,974
I don't say "but, um."

616
00:14:28,679 --> 00:14:31,974
I have never said "but, um."

617
00:14:32,016 --> 00:14:34,226
Well, then I guess

618
00:14:32,016 --> 00:14:34,226
it's not a very good

619
00:14:32,016 --> 00:14:34,226
drinking game,

620
00:14:34,268 --> 00:14:36,228
which would mean last night,

621
00:14:34,268 --> 00:14:36,228
when Barney and I played it,

622
00:14:36,270 --> 00:14:40,024
I didn't get super wasted

623
00:14:36,270 --> 00:14:40,024
and throw up all over myself.

624
00:14:40,066 --> 00:14:44,653
Wait!

625
00:14:40,066 --> 00:14:44,653
I did both of those

626
00:14:40,066 --> 00:14:44,653
things, so face!

627
00:14:47,489 --> 00:14:49,784
Hey, Jenkins.

628
00:14:47,489 --> 00:14:49,784
Hey, buddy.

629
00:14:49,825 --> 00:14:54,956
Hey, so Lily and I

630
00:14:49,825 --> 00:14:54,956
are gonna go back to

631
00:14:49,825 --> 00:14:54,956
that college bar again,

632
00:14:54,997 --> 00:14:57,416
and we were wondering

633
00:14:54,997 --> 00:14:57,416
if maybe you wanted to come.

634
00:14:57,458 --> 00:14:59,752
You could just, like,

635
00:14:57,458 --> 00:14:59,752
watch me play skee ball,

636
00:14:59,794 --> 00:15:02,838
or do exactly what

637
00:14:59,794 --> 00:15:02,838
you did the other night.

638
00:14:59,794 --> 00:15:02,838
Something like that.

639
00:15:02,880 --> 00:15:05,591
It's really up to you.

640
00:15:02,880 --> 00:15:05,591
I mean, I know that...

641
00:15:23,317 --> 00:15:26,570
Hey, baby,

642
00:15:23,317 --> 00:15:26,570
what are you doing home?

643
00:15:26,612 --> 00:15:29,657
"Baby"? That's a name

644
00:15:26,612 --> 00:15:29,657
I don't deserve.

645
00:15:30,574 --> 00:15:31,742
What?

646
00:15:31,784 --> 00:15:32,493
Jenkins kissed me.

647
00:15:33,661 --> 00:15:35,537
She kissed me.

648
00:15:35,579 --> 00:15:38,791
The other day she

649
00:15:35,579 --> 00:15:38,791
saw me play skee ball,

650
00:15:35,579 --> 00:15:38,791
and I don't know,

651
00:15:38,833 --> 00:15:41,376
I guess she caught some

652
00:15:38,833 --> 00:15:41,376
of the Big Fudge fever.

653
00:15:41,418 --> 00:15:44,546
But you have to know,

654
00:15:41,418 --> 00:15:44,546
I stopped it right away,

655
00:15:44,588 --> 00:15:47,257
and you're the only one

656
00:15:44,588 --> 00:15:47,257
for me, baby.

657
00:15:49,343 --> 00:15:51,720
Oh, I see what this is.

658
00:15:51,762 --> 00:15:54,974
This is about the whole

659
00:15:51,762 --> 00:15:54,974
reacher-settler thing.

660
00:15:55,016 --> 00:15:56,934
Come again

661
00:15:55,016 --> 00:15:56,934
for Big Fudge?

662
00:15:56,976 --> 00:16:00,521
You want to make me jealous,

663
00:15:56,976 --> 00:16:00,521
so you're making up a story

664
00:15:56,976 --> 00:16:00,521
about Jenkins.

665
00:16:00,562 --> 00:16:03,649
I'm not making this up!

666
00:16:00,562 --> 00:16:03,649
This happened!

667
00:16:03,691 --> 00:16:06,235
That woman kissed me,

668
00:16:03,691 --> 00:16:06,235
with tongue.

669
00:16:06,276 --> 00:16:08,196
Her tongue

670
00:16:06,276 --> 00:16:08,196
was in my mouth!

671
00:16:08,237 --> 00:16:10,198
Sure it was.

672
00:16:10,239 --> 00:16:13,617
It was thick and rough,

673
00:16:10,239 --> 00:16:13,617
like a starfish arm!

674
00:16:13,659 --> 00:16:16,912
I'm so jealous!

675
00:16:13,659 --> 00:16:16,912
I'm just gonna

676
00:16:13,659 --> 00:16:16,912
go over there

677
00:16:16,954 --> 00:16:18,539
and punch her

678
00:16:16,954 --> 00:16:18,539
right in the nose.

679
00:16:18,580 --> 00:16:21,125
Give her

680
00:16:18,580 --> 00:16:21,125
a knuckle sandwich!

681
00:16:21,167 --> 00:16:23,293
Come on, baby.

682
00:16:21,167 --> 00:16:23,293
You want some soup?

683
00:16:25,213 --> 00:16:27,798
It happened!

684
00:16:27,840 --> 00:16:31,260
Do you have any

685
00:16:27,840 --> 00:16:31,260
split-pea left?

686
00:16:33,762 --> 00:16:36,849
These are just a few of

687
00:16:33,762 --> 00:16:36,849
the many contributions

688
00:16:33,762 --> 00:16:36,849
he made to architecture,

689
00:16:36,891 --> 00:16:40,352
and yet,

690
00:16:36,891 --> 00:16:40,352
he is only remembered

691
00:16:36,891 --> 00:16:40,352
for one thing.

692
00:16:40,394 --> 00:16:45,774
That, my friends,

693
00:16:40,394 --> 00:16:45,774
is the sad legacy of

694
00:16:40,394 --> 00:16:45,774
Gregorio Francetti Gazebo.

695
00:16:47,985 --> 00:16:49,361
Any questions?

696
00:16:49,403 --> 00:16:51,363
Hey, do you want to go out

697
00:16:49,403 --> 00:16:51,363
drinking with us tonight?

698
00:16:51,405 --> 00:16:53,032
What?

699
00:16:51,405 --> 00:16:53,032
Yeah, we were gonna play

700
00:16:53,074 --> 00:16:54,533
the Robin Scherbatsky

701
00:16:53,074 --> 00:16:54,533
drinking game.

702
00:16:54,575 --> 00:16:57,369
We were wondering

703
00:16:54,575 --> 00:16:57,369
if you wanted to

704
00:16:54,575 --> 00:16:57,369
join us.

705
00:16:57,411 --> 00:17:01,415
Well, what can I say except,

706
00:16:57,411 --> 00:17:01,415
"But-ums up."

707
00:17:04,418 --> 00:17:05,878
Can I still come?

708
00:17:06,628 --> 00:17:08,130
I'll pay.

709
00:17:10,299 --> 00:17:14,053
So, your third book

710
00:17:10,299 --> 00:17:14,053
was your breakout novel,

711
00:17:10,299 --> 00:17:14,053
but, um...

712
00:17:14,095 --> 00:17:15,596
But, um!

713
00:17:14,095 --> 00:17:15,596
But, um!

714
00:17:16,097 --> 00:17:19,349
Damn! Sorry.

715
00:17:19,391 --> 00:17:23,353
But... Just "but,"

716
00:17:19,391 --> 00:17:23,353
no "um." Just "but."

717
00:17:23,395 --> 00:17:26,690
Your first novel was

718
00:17:23,395 --> 00:17:26,690
written more quickly.

719
00:17:26,732 --> 00:17:28,025
That's correct.

720
00:17:26,732 --> 00:17:28,025
But, um...

721
00:17:28,067 --> 00:17:29,568
But, um!

722
00:17:28,067 --> 00:17:29,568
But, um!

723
00:17:31,070 --> 00:17:32,571
How great is this?

724
00:17:34,448 --> 00:17:37,409
And it was right then

725
00:17:34,448 --> 00:17:37,409
that Robin got an idea

726
00:17:37,451 --> 00:17:39,411
that would end

727
00:17:37,451 --> 00:17:39,411
the drinking game forever.

728
00:17:39,453 --> 00:17:42,039
I wanted to ask you

729
00:17:39,453 --> 00:17:42,039
about the novel

730
00:17:42,081 --> 00:17:43,415
you're writing

731
00:17:42,081 --> 00:17:43,415
right now, but, um...

732
00:17:43,457 --> 00:17:45,167
But, um!

733
00:17:43,457 --> 00:17:45,167
But, um!

734
00:17:45,209 --> 00:17:47,336
It's an idea you've

735
00:17:45,209 --> 00:17:47,336
had for a... But, um...

736
00:17:47,377 --> 00:17:48,420
But, um!

737
00:17:47,377 --> 00:17:48,420
But, um!

738
00:17:48,462 --> 00:17:49,379
time. But, um...

739
00:17:49,421 --> 00:17:51,924
But, um!

740
00:17:49,421 --> 00:17:51,924
But, um!

741
00:17:51,966 --> 00:17:54,426
No. No, no, no.

742
00:17:51,966 --> 00:17:54,426
Don't drink.

743
00:17:51,966 --> 00:17:54,426
It's a trap.

744
00:17:54,468 --> 00:17:57,012
I think I'm gonna go.

745
00:17:54,468 --> 00:17:57,012
You can keep your 10 bucks.

746
00:17:57,054 --> 00:17:59,890
Okay, but, um,

747
00:17:57,054 --> 00:17:59,890
thanks for being with us.

748
00:17:59,932 --> 00:18:02,434
But, um, if there's any

749
00:17:59,932 --> 00:18:02,434
college kids watching,

750
00:18:02,476 --> 00:18:05,187
but-um, but-um, but-um,

751
00:18:02,476 --> 00:18:05,187
but-um, but-um, but-um,

752
00:18:02,476 --> 00:18:05,187
but-um, but-um...

753
00:18:05,229 --> 00:18:07,606
We have to drink,

754
00:18:05,229 --> 00:18:07,606
professor.

755
00:18:05,229 --> 00:18:07,606
It's the rules.

756
00:18:08,649 --> 00:18:10,484
She said "but, um."

757
00:18:13,487 --> 00:18:14,613
God help us all.

758
00:18:17,825 --> 00:18:19,451
There you are.

759
00:18:19,493 --> 00:18:22,037
I'm so sorry

760
00:18:19,493 --> 00:18:22,037
I kissed you yesterday.

761
00:18:22,079 --> 00:18:23,747
That's okay.

762
00:18:23,789 --> 00:18:25,624
And I'm sorry I

763
00:18:23,789 --> 00:18:25,624
had sex with you

764
00:18:23,789 --> 00:18:25,624
in the mailroom.

765
00:18:25,666 --> 00:18:27,793
That wasn't me.

766
00:18:27,835 --> 00:18:31,421
Good grief! That's two

767
00:18:27,835 --> 00:18:31,421
awkward conversations

768
00:18:27,835 --> 00:18:31,421
I have to have today.

769
00:18:31,463 --> 00:18:34,175
I don't normally do that.

770
00:18:31,463 --> 00:18:34,175
I was really drunk.

771
00:18:34,216 --> 00:18:35,717
You were drunk

772
00:18:34,216 --> 00:18:35,717
at 8:00 in the morning?

773
00:18:35,759 --> 00:18:37,886
Yeah, I don't know

774
00:18:35,759 --> 00:18:37,886
how that happened.

775
00:18:37,928 --> 00:18:40,222
I thought

776
00:18:37,928 --> 00:18:40,222
snail pellets were safe,

777
00:18:37,928 --> 00:18:40,222
but, um...

778
00:18:40,264 --> 00:18:41,431
But, um!

779
00:18:40,264 --> 00:18:41,431
But, um!

780
00:18:46,478 --> 00:18:47,813
I gotta get to work.

781
00:18:50,024 --> 00:18:52,109
Man, that game is

782
00:18:50,024 --> 00:18:52,109
really catching on.

783
00:18:52,151 --> 00:18:53,527
Damn it!

784
00:18:52,151 --> 00:18:53,527
How could I do this?

785
00:18:53,568 --> 00:18:54,736
It's okay.

786
00:18:54,778 --> 00:18:56,613
No, you know what?

787
00:18:54,778 --> 00:18:56,613
It's not okay.

788
00:18:56,655 --> 00:18:58,782
You're the nicest guy

789
00:18:56,655 --> 00:18:58,782
in this stupid office,

790
00:18:58,824 --> 00:19:01,952
and I really don't want

791
00:18:58,824 --> 00:19:01,952
to screw up our friendship.

792
00:19:01,994 --> 00:19:04,496
This is so embarrassing.

793
00:19:01,994 --> 00:19:04,496
Please don't tell anyone.

794
00:19:04,538 --> 00:19:09,126
No, who am I gonna tell?

795
00:19:04,538 --> 00:19:09,126
Lily? I told Lily.

796
00:19:09,168 --> 00:19:12,004
For Pete's sake.

797
00:19:09,168 --> 00:19:12,004
Well, I gotta go talk to her.

798
00:19:09,168 --> 00:19:12,004
I gotta apologize.

799
00:19:12,046 --> 00:19:14,006
No! No! No!

800
00:19:12,046 --> 00:19:14,006
Yes.

801
00:19:14,048 --> 00:19:17,134
Marshall, I'm just gonna

802
00:19:14,048 --> 00:19:17,134
tell her that it happened,

803
00:19:14,048 --> 00:19:17,134
that it meant nothing,

804
00:19:17,176 --> 00:19:17,968
and that I'm sorry.

805
00:19:18,010 --> 00:19:19,178
No, I...

806
00:19:21,555 --> 00:19:25,976
Yes. Yes. Do that.

807
00:19:26,018 --> 00:19:27,395
I will.

808
00:19:26,018 --> 00:19:27,395
Yeah,

809
00:19:27,436 --> 00:19:28,729
and if you don't

810
00:19:27,436 --> 00:19:28,729
have time for all that,

811
00:19:28,770 --> 00:19:31,773
just tell her it happened

812
00:19:28,770 --> 00:19:31,773
and that you're sorry.

813
00:19:31,815 --> 00:19:33,901
And if you're in a real rush,

814
00:19:31,815 --> 00:19:33,901
you don't even have to say

815
00:19:31,815 --> 00:19:33,901
"I'm sorry."

816
00:19:33,942 --> 00:19:35,527
Just tell her

817
00:19:33,942 --> 00:19:35,527
that it happened.

818
00:19:35,569 --> 00:19:38,197
That's the important part,

819
00:19:35,569 --> 00:19:38,197
that it actually happened.

820
00:19:38,239 --> 00:19:42,117
So, emphasize that

821
00:19:38,239 --> 00:19:42,117
as much as you can.

822
00:19:42,159 --> 00:19:45,287
And so, Lily,

823
00:19:42,159 --> 00:19:45,287
I guess what I'm saying is,

824
00:19:42,159 --> 00:19:45,287
it happened.

825
00:19:45,329 --> 00:19:48,665
I feel terrible about it,

826
00:19:45,329 --> 00:19:48,665
and I'm really sorry.

827
00:19:48,707 --> 00:19:51,960
Well, it happened.

828
00:19:52,002 --> 00:19:55,172
What are you gonna do?

829
00:19:52,002 --> 00:19:55,172
It happened. Terrible.

830
00:19:56,215 --> 00:19:58,675
But like I said,

831
00:19:56,215 --> 00:19:58,675
it happened.

832
00:19:58,717 --> 00:20:00,428
Exactly. And I feel

833
00:19:58,717 --> 00:20:00,428
awful about it.

834
00:20:00,469 --> 00:20:03,722
And I'd hate myself

835
00:20:00,469 --> 00:20:03,722
if what I did hurt you

836
00:20:00,469 --> 00:20:03,722
in any way,

837
00:20:03,764 --> 00:20:05,974
or affected

838
00:20:03,764 --> 00:20:05,974
your relationship

839
00:20:03,764 --> 00:20:05,974
with Marshall.

840
00:20:06,016 --> 00:20:08,394
Please forgive me.

841
00:20:08,436 --> 00:20:10,562
Kiss my husband?

842
00:20:08,436 --> 00:20:10,562
My husband?

843
00:20:10,604 --> 00:20:13,523
Nobody kisses my

844
00:20:10,604 --> 00:20:13,523
future baby-daddy

845
00:20:10,604 --> 00:20:13,523
but me!

846
00:20:16,026 --> 00:20:17,194
Marshall, you're

847
00:20:16,026 --> 00:20:17,194
blocking the shot!

848
00:20:17,236 --> 00:20:18,779
Well, I...

849
00:20:18,820 --> 00:20:20,322
And, kids,

850
00:20:18,820 --> 00:20:20,322
your Uncle Marshall

851
00:20:20,364 --> 00:20:22,574
never tried to make

852
00:20:20,364 --> 00:20:22,574
Lily jealous again.

853
00:20:22,616 --> 00:20:23,533
Lil!

854
00:20:22,616 --> 00:20:23,533
That's good.

855
00:20:31,833 --> 00:20:34,962
Okay, we're just gonna have

856
00:20:31,833 --> 00:20:34,962
a nice low-key class today.

857
00:20:36,630 --> 00:20:40,217
Not a lot of talking.

858
00:20:36,630 --> 00:20:40,217
No loud noises.

859
00:20:43,637 --> 00:20:45,597
Sup, guys?

860
00:20:45,639 --> 00:20:48,600
No, no, no, no, no.

861
00:20:45,639 --> 00:20:48,600
Please, just go away.

862
00:20:48,642 --> 00:20:51,561
I just wanted to

863
00:20:48,642 --> 00:20:51,561
drop by and say...

864
00:20:53,188 --> 00:20:57,192
Thanks for watching,

865
00:20:53,188 --> 00:20:57,192
Come on, Get Up, New York!

866
00:20:57,234 --> 00:20:58,527
Whoo!

867
00:21:03,532 --> 00:21:04,574
But, um!

868
00:21:31,685 --> 00:21:32,602
ENGLISH - US - LINE 21