1 00:00:01,600 --> 00:00:03,141 By the fall of 2011, 2 00:00:01,600 --> 00:00:03,141 technology had taken 3 00:00:03,266 --> 00:00:07,767 a lot of the intrigue 4 00:00:03,266 --> 00:00:07,767 out of life. 5 00:00:07,892 --> 00:00:10,892 The Internet had everyone's 6 00:00:07,892 --> 00:00:10,892 wall of information. 7 00:00:12,642 --> 00:00:15,642 Nothing was a mystery anymore. 8 00:00:18,433 --> 00:00:20,642 But, kids, there was 9 00:00:18,433 --> 00:00:20,642 a time before that, 10 00:00:20,767 --> 00:00:23,018 way back in the dark ages. 11 00:00:23,141 --> 00:00:24,517 Are you people insane? 12 00:00:24,642 --> 00:00:26,892 The most popular food in America 13 00:00:24,642 --> 00:00:26,892 is the cheeseburger! 14 00:00:27,018 --> 00:00:28,517 No way! It's pizza! 15 00:00:28,642 --> 00:00:31,684 Are we forgetting about 16 00:00:28,642 --> 00:00:31,684 a certain Mr. Furter, 17 00:00:31,809 --> 00:00:33,308 first name Frank? 18 00:00:33,433 --> 00:00:35,684 Um, what did every kid 19 00:00:33,433 --> 00:00:35,684 bring in their lunchbox 20 00:00:35,809 --> 00:00:37,892 every day till 21 00:00:35,809 --> 00:00:37,892 grade eight? 22 00:00:38,018 --> 00:00:39,391 Pancakes with 23 00:00:38,018 --> 00:00:39,391 maple syrup. 24 00:00:40,391 --> 00:00:41,767 Thanks, Canada. 25 00:00:41,892 --> 00:00:44,642 We're looking for a food 26 00:00:41,892 --> 00:00:44,642 the average American eats. 27 00:00:44,767 --> 00:00:45,934 Yeah. Yeah. 28 00:00:44,767 --> 00:00:45,934 Oh! 29 00:00:46,058 --> 00:00:47,308 Chinese food. 30 00:00:47,433 --> 00:00:49,684 And then came the smartphone. 31 00:00:51,767 --> 00:00:53,018 Hey, remember 32 00:00:53,141 --> 00:00:56,266 when we were arguing about 33 00:00:53,141 --> 00:00:56,266 the most popular food? 34 00:00:57,517 --> 00:00:58,642 It's bread. 35 00:00:58,767 --> 00:01:00,600 Hm. 36 00:01:00,725 --> 00:01:02,892 And the barroom debate 37 00:01:00,725 --> 00:01:02,892 was dead. 38 00:01:03,018 --> 00:01:05,018 You guys are idiots! 39 00:01:05,183 --> 00:01:07,684 Okay, not completely dead. 40 00:01:05,183 --> 00:01:07,684 You are seriously telling me 41 00:01:07,809 --> 00:01:09,183 you don't want 42 00:01:07,809 --> 00:01:09,183 to open that envelope 43 00:01:09,266 --> 00:01:11,391 and find out if you're 44 00:01:09,266 --> 00:01:11,391 having a boy or a girl? 45 00:01:11,517 --> 00:01:15,018 Nope. Dr. Sonya only gave us 46 00:01:11,517 --> 00:01:15,018 this in case we wanted to know. 47 00:01:15,183 --> 00:01:16,767 But we don't. 48 00:01:16,892 --> 00:01:19,391 Lilypad and I are just gonna 49 00:01:16,892 --> 00:01:19,391 wait till that baby pops out 50 00:01:19,517 --> 00:01:20,892 and enjoy the big surprise. 51 00:01:21,018 --> 00:01:23,558 Look, I have pretended 52 00:01:21,018 --> 00:01:23,558 to be a licensed therapist 53 00:01:23,684 --> 00:01:25,767 enough times to know 54 00:01:23,684 --> 00:01:25,767 there is something unhealthy 55 00:01:25,892 --> 00:01:27,642 about your not wanting 56 00:01:25,892 --> 00:01:27,642 to find out. 57 00:01:27,767 --> 00:01:29,767 Back me up here, Kev. 58 00:01:27,767 --> 00:01:29,767 No, no, no, 59 00:01:27,767 --> 00:01:29,767 no, no. 60 00:01:29,892 --> 00:01:33,266 This real therapist 61 00:01:29,892 --> 00:01:33,266 won't risk upsetting 62 00:01:33,391 --> 00:01:36,767 his wonderful new 63 00:01:33,391 --> 00:01:36,767 girlfriend by analyzing 64 00:01:33,391 --> 00:01:36,767 her wonderful friends. 65 00:01:37,934 --> 00:01:40,642 No matter how mentally 66 00:01:37,934 --> 00:01:40,642 unbalanced they may be. 67 00:01:40,767 --> 00:01:41,767 I hear you. 68 00:01:41,892 --> 00:01:43,391 I don't think you do. 69 00:01:43,517 --> 00:01:46,433 We just don't want to 70 00:01:43,517 --> 00:01:46,433 burden our little angel 71 00:01:46,558 --> 00:01:49,684 with all kinds of 72 00:01:46,558 --> 00:01:49,684 gender-specific 73 00:01:46,558 --> 00:01:49,684 expectations. 74 00:01:49,809 --> 00:01:52,391 Boys can do ballet; 75 00:01:49,809 --> 00:01:52,391 girls can play football. 76 00:01:52,517 --> 00:01:56,017 Hell, the Green Bay 77 00:01:52,517 --> 00:01:56,017 Packers have been 78 00:01:52,517 --> 00:01:56,017 proving that for years. 79 00:01:58,391 --> 00:02:01,183 That would've gotten 80 00:01:58,391 --> 00:02:01,183 a big laugh at a sports bar. 81 00:02:01,266 --> 00:02:03,183 Well, I say define 82 00:02:01,266 --> 00:02:03,183 gender roles early. 83 00:02:03,266 --> 00:02:05,308 All the other girls 84 00:02:03,266 --> 00:02:05,308 got a pretty dress 85 00:02:05,433 --> 00:02:08,017 and a cake when 86 00:02:05,433 --> 00:02:08,017 they turned 14. 87 00:02:08,183 --> 00:02:09,266 Me... 88 00:02:09,391 --> 00:02:11,558 I want to go home, Daddy! 89 00:02:11,684 --> 00:02:15,266 That direction is 90 00:02:11,684 --> 00:02:15,266 nothing but wolves. 91 00:02:16,767 --> 00:02:21,183 And 40 kilometers that way 92 00:02:16,767 --> 00:02:21,183 is the mining town of Smithers. 93 00:02:21,266 --> 00:02:23,892 I'd take my chances 94 00:02:21,266 --> 00:02:23,892 with the wolves. 95 00:02:26,308 --> 00:02:29,266 I'll see you in three days. 96 00:02:29,391 --> 00:02:31,809 Well, wait, wh-what 97 00:02:29,391 --> 00:02:31,809 am I supposed to eat? 98 00:02:31,934 --> 00:02:34,934 Hey, you've got a knife, 99 00:02:31,934 --> 00:02:34,934 the forest is full of animals... 100 00:02:35,058 --> 00:02:36,684 what do you want, a buffet? 101 00:02:36,809 --> 00:02:38,642 Papa...! 102 00:02:38,767 --> 00:02:41,767 Happy birthday, son...! 103 00:02:43,391 --> 00:02:45,767 Got any thoughts 104 00:02:43,391 --> 00:02:45,767 on that, Doc? 105 00:02:45,892 --> 00:02:48,517 If you guys think 106 00:02:45,892 --> 00:02:48,517 I'm going near that, 107 00:02:45,892 --> 00:02:48,517 you're crazy. 108 00:02:48,642 --> 00:02:50,558 Why'd you 109 00:02:48,642 --> 00:02:50,558 emphasize "you're"? 110 00:02:50,684 --> 00:02:52,892 No reason. 111 00:02:50,684 --> 00:02:52,892 You're pretty. 112 00:03:05,809 --> 00:03:09,183 By the way, do you guys want 113 00:03:05,809 --> 00:03:09,183 to come over tomorrow night 114 00:03:05,809 --> 00:03:09,183 for sangria and tapas? 115 00:03:09,308 --> 00:03:10,892 Si. Muchas gracias. 116 00:03:09,308 --> 00:03:10,892 That sounds awesome. 117 00:03:11,017 --> 00:03:12,642 Great. We're also 118 00:03:11,017 --> 00:03:12,642 gonna paint the nursery. 119 00:03:12,767 --> 00:03:15,433 Oh, and a quick update 120 00:03:12,767 --> 00:03:15,433 on the sangria and tapas... 121 00:03:15,558 --> 00:03:17,058 that's cancelled. 122 00:03:15,558 --> 00:03:17,058 Mmm... 123 00:03:17,183 --> 00:03:18,183 Guess what smooth 124 00:03:17,183 --> 00:03:18,183 son of a bitch 125 00:03:18,308 --> 00:03:20,809 just picked up 126 00:03:18,308 --> 00:03:20,809 a girl at the bar? 127 00:03:20,933 --> 00:03:22,767 Barney, you're cheating 128 00:03:20,933 --> 00:03:22,767 on Nora already? 129 00:03:22,892 --> 00:03:24,183 No, guys, it's me. 130 00:03:24,308 --> 00:03:26,017 Janet Mclntyre. 131 00:03:26,183 --> 00:03:27,391 Struck up 132 00:03:26,183 --> 00:03:27,391 a conversation 133 00:03:26,183 --> 00:03:27,391 at the bar 134 00:03:27,517 --> 00:03:29,391 while ordering, she guessed 135 00:03:27,517 --> 00:03:29,391 bread right away, 136 00:03:29,517 --> 00:03:32,891 we laughed, it was 137 00:03:29,517 --> 00:03:32,891 a thing, boom, going 138 00:03:29,517 --> 00:03:32,891 out tomorrow night. 139 00:03:33,017 --> 00:03:36,308 So, she said yes 140 00:03:33,017 --> 00:03:36,308 just like that? 141 00:03:33,017 --> 00:03:36,308 Just like that. 142 00:03:36,433 --> 00:03:38,933 BARNEY/ROBIN: There's 143 00:03:36,433 --> 00:03:38,933 something wrong with her. 144 00:03:36,433 --> 00:03:38,933 No, no, no, no. 145 00:03:39,058 --> 00:03:40,017 Stop it. They 146 00:03:39,058 --> 00:03:40,017 always do this. 147 00:03:40,183 --> 00:03:42,266 Every time I go 148 00:03:40,183 --> 00:03:42,266 on a first date, 149 00:03:42,391 --> 00:03:44,558 they snap right into 150 00:03:42,391 --> 00:03:44,558 research mode. 151 00:03:44,684 --> 00:03:46,183 It started by accident. 152 00:03:46,266 --> 00:03:48,391 Ooh. 153 00:03:49,517 --> 00:03:50,725 Hello? 154 00:03:50,851 --> 00:03:52,891 Ted, we did a little 155 00:03:50,851 --> 00:03:52,891 Internet research 156 00:03:53,017 --> 00:03:54,183 on your Mia Plumley. 157 00:03:54,308 --> 00:03:55,391 We just sent you 158 00:03:55,517 --> 00:03:56,891 a picture of her 159 00:03:55,517 --> 00:03:56,891 from six months ago. 160 00:03:57,017 --> 00:03:58,891 I don't understand... 161 00:03:57,017 --> 00:03:58,891 is Mia standing behind 162 00:03:59,017 --> 00:04:02,183 this morbidly obese wo... 163 00:03:59,017 --> 00:04:02,183 Oh, my God! 164 00:04:02,308 --> 00:04:04,767 They had cookies and cream. 165 00:04:04,891 --> 00:04:06,933 And what you were saying 166 00:04:04,891 --> 00:04:06,933 about how women feel 167 00:04:07,058 --> 00:04:09,266 they have to starve themselves 168 00:04:07,058 --> 00:04:09,266 makes so much sense. 169 00:04:10,017 --> 00:04:12,767 Ooh, hot dogs. Score! 170 00:04:12,891 --> 00:04:15,017 After that, background checks 171 00:04:15,183 --> 00:04:17,809 became standard 172 00:04:15,183 --> 00:04:17,809 operating procedure. 173 00:04:17,933 --> 00:04:19,891 The date with Nadine went great. 174 00:04:20,017 --> 00:04:21,767 Unless you guys found something. 175 00:04:21,891 --> 00:04:23,391 Are you sitting down? 176 00:04:23,517 --> 00:04:25,308 No. 177 00:04:27,266 --> 00:04:31,183 She's wanted in Florida 178 00:04:27,266 --> 00:04:31,183 on crystal meth charges. 179 00:04:31,308 --> 00:04:34,183 She breeds pit bulls 180 00:04:31,308 --> 00:04:34,183 for dog fighting. 181 00:04:34,266 --> 00:04:36,017 Also, the FBI... 182 00:04:34,266 --> 00:04:36,017 What's this link? 183 00:04:36,183 --> 00:04:38,183 Oh, she also writes 184 00:04:36,183 --> 00:04:38,183 online movie reviews. 185 00:04:38,266 --> 00:04:41,183 Anyway, she's still 186 00:04:38,266 --> 00:04:41,183 married to a death row 187 00:04:38,266 --> 00:04:41,183 inmate convicted... 188 00:04:41,266 --> 00:04:44,183 She gave Annie Hall 189 00:04:41,266 --> 00:04:44,183 two out of ten stars? 190 00:04:44,266 --> 00:04:46,433 "Slow and overrated"? 191 00:04:46,558 --> 00:04:48,891 Really? That's 192 00:04:46,558 --> 00:04:48,891 your takeaway? 193 00:04:49,017 --> 00:04:51,183 It's the Wood Man at 194 00:04:49,017 --> 00:04:51,183 the height of his powers. 195 00:04:51,266 --> 00:04:54,058 The way he broke the fourth wall 196 00:04:51,266 --> 00:04:54,058 by talking directly to camera? 197 00:04:54,183 --> 00:04:55,933 People have been 198 00:04:54,183 --> 00:04:55,933 ripping that off ever since. 199 00:04:56,058 --> 00:04:59,517 Can you believe this guy? 200 00:04:59,642 --> 00:05:01,017 Paula Vincenzo. 201 00:05:01,183 --> 00:05:02,391 She's in the bathroom. 202 00:05:02,517 --> 00:05:03,517 What's wrong with her? 203 00:05:03,642 --> 00:05:05,433 Total psycho. 204 00:05:03,642 --> 00:05:05,433 Her Facebook wall 205 00:05:05,558 --> 00:05:08,558 has a link to a site about 206 00:05:05,558 --> 00:05:08,558 dating inanimate objects. 207 00:05:08,684 --> 00:05:10,642 For most of last year, 208 00:05:08,684 --> 00:05:10,642 she was engaged... 209 00:05:10,767 --> 00:05:13,017 to a mini fridge. 210 00:05:10,767 --> 00:05:13,017 And there's pictures: 211 00:05:13,183 --> 00:05:15,017 her and the mini 212 00:05:13,183 --> 00:05:15,017 fridge on a hike, 213 00:05:15,183 --> 00:05:17,017 her and the mini fridge 214 00:05:15,183 --> 00:05:17,017 in wine country, 215 00:05:17,183 --> 00:05:18,808 here's the mini fridge 216 00:05:17,183 --> 00:05:18,808 meeting her parents... 217 00:05:18,933 --> 00:05:20,517 Run like the wind. 218 00:05:22,933 --> 00:05:26,183 So... want to go 219 00:05:22,933 --> 00:05:26,183 back to my place? 220 00:05:26,266 --> 00:05:28,183 Yeah, all right. 221 00:05:30,266 --> 00:05:33,266 Well, thanks to us, 222 00:05:30,266 --> 00:05:33,266 you ran screaming from 223 00:05:30,266 --> 00:05:33,266 that freak show, right? 224 00:05:33,391 --> 00:05:35,391 Absolutely. 225 00:05:33,391 --> 00:05:35,391 Cuckoo! 226 00:05:37,058 --> 00:05:38,642 So what's the problem? 227 00:05:38,766 --> 00:05:39,684 You need us. 228 00:05:39,808 --> 00:05:41,017 No, I don't, okay? 229 00:05:41,183 --> 00:05:42,517 I don't want a 230 00:05:41,183 --> 00:05:42,517 background check. 231 00:05:42,642 --> 00:05:44,517 I want adventure 232 00:05:42,642 --> 00:05:44,517 and excitement. 233 00:05:44,642 --> 00:05:45,933 Look, if it's 234 00:05:44,642 --> 00:05:45,933 a choice 235 00:05:46,058 --> 00:05:47,766 between mystery 236 00:05:46,058 --> 00:05:47,766 and history, 237 00:05:47,891 --> 00:05:49,808 I want mystery. 238 00:05:49,933 --> 00:05:51,183 In fact... 239 00:05:51,308 --> 00:05:52,808 Ted, I wouldn't... 240 00:05:52,933 --> 00:05:55,017 Uh, Janet. 241 00:05:55,183 --> 00:05:57,266 I have a theory. 242 00:05:55,183 --> 00:05:57,266 People don't get the chance 243 00:05:57,391 --> 00:05:59,391 to just discover 244 00:05:57,391 --> 00:05:59,391 each other anymore, so... 245 00:05:59,517 --> 00:06:00,600 here's my idea. 246 00:06:00,725 --> 00:06:02,017 Before we go out tomorrow, 247 00:06:02,183 --> 00:06:04,642 let's not do any prior 248 00:06:02,183 --> 00:06:04,642 Internet research on each other. 249 00:06:04,766 --> 00:06:07,183 It sounds like 250 00:06:04,766 --> 00:06:07,183 I'm hiding something 251 00:06:04,766 --> 00:06:07,183 horrible, doesn't it? 252 00:06:07,308 --> 00:06:08,642 I'm pretty sure 253 00:06:07,308 --> 00:06:08,642 you're a serial killer. 254 00:06:08,766 --> 00:06:10,017 I'm not. I'm not. 255 00:06:10,183 --> 00:06:12,017 It's just, you know, like, 256 00:06:10,183 --> 00:06:12,017 when my parents met, 257 00:06:12,183 --> 00:06:14,017 they didn't have the Internet... 258 00:06:12,183 --> 00:06:14,017 they just went out 259 00:06:14,183 --> 00:06:15,891 on a blind date 260 00:06:14,183 --> 00:06:15,891 and fell in love. 261 00:06:16,017 --> 00:06:17,766 That's nice. 262 00:06:16,017 --> 00:06:17,766 And they're still together? 263 00:06:17,891 --> 00:06:19,017 Right up to the divorce. 264 00:06:19,183 --> 00:06:21,891 The point is, I'd love 265 00:06:19,183 --> 00:06:21,891 to get to know you 266 00:06:22,017 --> 00:06:24,266 in person, not on my computer. 267 00:06:24,391 --> 00:06:26,266 I like that. 268 00:06:24,391 --> 00:06:26,266 What started out 269 00:06:26,391 --> 00:06:28,558 sounding really creepy 270 00:06:26,391 --> 00:06:28,558 turned out really sweet. 271 00:06:28,684 --> 00:06:31,766 That's kind of my move. 272 00:06:31,891 --> 00:06:33,266 And she was 273 00:06:33,391 --> 00:06:35,433 on board with the whole 274 00:06:33,391 --> 00:06:35,433 "no Internet" thing? 275 00:06:35,558 --> 00:06:37,308 She loved it. 276 00:06:38,517 --> 00:06:39,517 The bitch is 277 00:06:38,517 --> 00:06:39,517 hiding something. 278 00:06:39,642 --> 00:06:41,308 The bitch is totally 279 00:06:39,642 --> 00:06:41,308 hiding something. 280 00:06:46,017 --> 00:06:47,433 Hey, Ted, before you leave... 281 00:06:47,558 --> 00:06:50,266 is Janet Mclntyre 282 00:06:47,558 --> 00:06:50,266 M-A-C or M-C? 283 00:06:50,391 --> 00:06:52,266 For the last time, 284 00:06:50,391 --> 00:06:52,266 I don't want to know 285 00:06:52,391 --> 00:06:53,891 anything about her 286 00:06:52,391 --> 00:06:53,891 before the date. 287 00:06:54,017 --> 00:06:56,766 You might want to see this, 288 00:06:54,017 --> 00:06:56,766 Ted... naked pictures. 289 00:06:56,891 --> 00:06:58,642 That's not Janet. 290 00:06:58,766 --> 00:07:00,475 Who, now? 291 00:07:00,600 --> 00:07:02,183 Seriously... 292 00:07:02,308 --> 00:07:05,266 if you guys respect 293 00:07:02,308 --> 00:07:05,266 me as a friend... 294 00:07:05,391 --> 00:07:06,766 stop looking. 295 00:07:11,266 --> 00:07:13,558 Well, Ted was pretty 296 00:07:11,266 --> 00:07:13,558 clear there, so... 297 00:07:13,683 --> 00:07:15,058 let's shut those laptops 298 00:07:15,183 --> 00:07:17,308 and go help Lily and Marshall, 299 00:07:15,183 --> 00:07:17,308 just like we promised. 300 00:07:17,433 --> 00:07:18,933 Let's leave 301 00:07:19,058 --> 00:07:22,391 the laptops here 302 00:07:19,058 --> 00:07:22,391 and go paint that baby room. 303 00:07:23,891 --> 00:07:25,808 Without laptops. 304 00:07:25,933 --> 00:07:27,433 Or bring the laptops. 305 00:07:25,933 --> 00:07:27,433 Either way. 306 00:07:27,558 --> 00:07:29,891 This is exciting. 307 00:07:30,017 --> 00:07:31,391 I give you... 308 00:07:31,517 --> 00:07:34,266 the color our child 309 00:07:31,517 --> 00:07:34,266 will grow up with. 310 00:07:34,391 --> 00:07:37,517 Yellow, like the sun. 311 00:07:37,642 --> 00:07:40,266 Or daughter. 312 00:07:37,642 --> 00:07:40,266 Pun snuggle. 313 00:07:40,391 --> 00:07:43,266 Oh, God, this room's about 314 00:07:40,391 --> 00:07:43,266 to get its first spit-up. 315 00:07:44,266 --> 00:07:46,391 Just open the envelope already! 316 00:07:46,517 --> 00:07:48,517 Kevin, will you please 317 00:07:46,517 --> 00:07:48,517 tell Barney that it is 318 00:07:48,641 --> 00:07:51,308 perfectly normal for us to want 319 00:07:48,641 --> 00:07:51,308 to preserve the mystery. 320 00:07:51,433 --> 00:07:53,891 I'm not here to analyze; I'm 321 00:07:51,433 --> 00:07:53,891 here to win boyfriend points. 322 00:07:54,017 --> 00:07:56,766 By the way, you all 323 00:07:54,017 --> 00:07:56,766 look great, especially Robin. 324 00:07:56,891 --> 00:07:59,017 Come on, if you don't 325 00:07:56,891 --> 00:07:59,017 know the gender, 326 00:07:59,183 --> 00:08:01,517 you're gonna get generic crap 327 00:07:59,183 --> 00:08:01,517 at the baby shower. 328 00:08:01,641 --> 00:08:03,308 But if you do know the gender, 329 00:08:03,433 --> 00:08:06,266 you'll get, oh, 330 00:08:03,433 --> 00:08:06,266 I don't know, this! 331 00:08:06,391 --> 00:08:07,766 Marshall! Lights! 332 00:08:08,766 --> 00:08:10,641 Okay. 333 00:08:12,433 --> 00:08:15,183 When little Jack's 334 00:08:12,433 --> 00:08:15,183 not turning double plays, 335 00:08:15,308 --> 00:08:17,017 he's turning heads with this 336 00:08:17,183 --> 00:08:19,017 home run of an outfit! 337 00:08:19,183 --> 00:08:21,183 And if it's a little girl... 338 00:08:21,308 --> 00:08:24,641 This royal ensemble 339 00:08:21,308 --> 00:08:24,641 may leave you speechless, 340 00:08:24,766 --> 00:08:26,308 but it's sure to make 341 00:08:24,766 --> 00:08:26,308 little Sally say, 342 00:08:26,433 --> 00:08:29,517 "I wuv you, Mommy, 343 00:08:26,433 --> 00:08:29,517 and I wuv my dress, 344 00:08:29,641 --> 00:08:33,183 and I would love 345 00:08:29,641 --> 00:08:33,183 to see you in the shower." 346 00:08:33,308 --> 00:08:35,433 Sorry, I kind of fell out of 347 00:08:33,308 --> 00:08:35,433 character in that last part. 348 00:08:35,558 --> 00:08:38,558 But if you don't 349 00:08:35,558 --> 00:08:38,558 know the gender... 350 00:08:38,683 --> 00:08:42,183 Little Fran is sure to be 351 00:08:38,683 --> 00:08:42,183 the pariah of the playground 352 00:08:42,308 --> 00:08:45,391 in this hermaphroditic 353 00:08:42,308 --> 00:08:45,391 burlap sack. 354 00:08:47,517 --> 00:08:48,808 Marshall! Lights! 355 00:08:51,183 --> 00:08:52,517 Barney, 356 00:08:52,641 --> 00:08:54,891 you don't really care about 357 00:08:52,641 --> 00:08:54,891 our child's wardrobe. 358 00:08:55,017 --> 00:08:55,641 No. You just 359 00:08:55,766 --> 00:08:56,641 can't stand 360 00:08:56,766 --> 00:08:58,183 not knowing something. 361 00:08:58,308 --> 00:09:00,183 That's ridiculous! 362 00:09:01,017 --> 00:09:02,017 Marshall, will you... 363 00:09:02,183 --> 00:09:03,433 will you hold 364 00:09:02,183 --> 00:09:03,433 these for a second? 365 00:09:03,557 --> 00:09:04,517 Yeah, sure. Why? 366 00:09:04,641 --> 00:09:06,391 Because I gots to know! 367 00:09:06,517 --> 00:09:08,517 Oh, Barney, no! 368 00:09:06,517 --> 00:09:08,517 Help! Get him off of me! 369 00:09:08,641 --> 00:09:11,017 Everybody hold it! 370 00:09:08,641 --> 00:09:11,017 Hold it! 371 00:09:11,183 --> 00:09:14,183 I found Janet Mclntyre, 372 00:09:11,183 --> 00:09:14,183 who's been widowed three times. 373 00:09:14,266 --> 00:09:16,266 She's obviously 374 00:09:14,266 --> 00:09:16,266 killing her husbands! 375 00:09:16,391 --> 00:09:18,891 Oh, my God! 376 00:09:19,017 --> 00:09:20,517 They're six minutes 377 00:09:19,017 --> 00:09:20,517 into the date. 378 00:09:20,641 --> 00:09:22,766 Ted's probably already told her 379 00:09:20,641 --> 00:09:22,766 that he loves her! 380 00:09:22,891 --> 00:09:24,433 We've got to get down there! 381 00:09:26,391 --> 00:09:28,183 Nobody's going anywhere! 382 00:09:28,266 --> 00:09:29,266 Why? 383 00:09:29,391 --> 00:09:30,808 Kids, at that moment, 384 00:09:30,933 --> 00:09:32,766 Kevin thought back 385 00:09:30,933 --> 00:09:32,766 to his earlier rule... 386 00:09:32,891 --> 00:09:35,183 This real therapist 387 00:09:32,891 --> 00:09:35,183 won't risk 388 00:09:35,266 --> 00:09:37,266 upsetting his wonderful 389 00:09:35,266 --> 00:09:37,266 new girlfriend 390 00:09:37,391 --> 00:09:39,391 by analyzing her 391 00:09:37,391 --> 00:09:39,391 wonderful friends. 392 00:09:39,517 --> 00:09:41,058 and threw it out the window. 393 00:09:41,183 --> 00:09:43,266 You're all the most 394 00:09:41,183 --> 00:09:43,266 codependent, incestuous, 395 00:09:43,391 --> 00:09:45,557 controlling group of 396 00:09:43,391 --> 00:09:45,557 people I've ever met! 397 00:09:47,516 --> 00:09:50,433 By the way, you all look 398 00:09:47,516 --> 00:09:50,433 great, especially Robin. 399 00:09:50,557 --> 00:09:52,433 Oh, mm-mm. 400 00:09:54,516 --> 00:09:57,183 This is so great. 401 00:09:57,308 --> 00:09:59,058 Right? See, if we'd 402 00:09:57,308 --> 00:09:59,058 researched each other, 403 00:09:59,183 --> 00:10:01,141 we'd both be secretly 404 00:09:59,183 --> 00:10:01,141 steering the conversation 405 00:10:01,266 --> 00:10:02,557 one way or the other. 406 00:10:02,683 --> 00:10:03,891 But this is 407 00:10:02,683 --> 00:10:03,891 more exciting, right? 408 00:10:04,017 --> 00:10:05,308 Way more exciting. 409 00:10:05,433 --> 00:10:07,058 I mean, we can talk 410 00:10:05,433 --> 00:10:07,058 about anything we want. 411 00:10:07,183 --> 00:10:09,391 Anything. 412 00:10:12,308 --> 00:10:13,808 So... 413 00:10:14,891 --> 00:10:17,141 how was the traffic 414 00:10:14,891 --> 00:10:17,141 getting here? 415 00:10:17,266 --> 00:10:19,141 You picked me up 416 00:10:17,266 --> 00:10:19,141 at my apartment. 417 00:10:20,141 --> 00:10:21,557 I certainly did. 418 00:10:22,683 --> 00:10:24,308 Oh, my God, 419 00:10:24,433 --> 00:10:27,017 I've lost the ability to talk 420 00:10:24,433 --> 00:10:27,017 to girls without the Internet. 421 00:10:27,141 --> 00:10:29,391 My brain is 422 00:10:27,141 --> 00:10:29,391 completely shutting down. 423 00:10:29,516 --> 00:10:31,891 So, are you folks gonna have 424 00:10:29,516 --> 00:10:31,891 dinner or just drinks? 425 00:10:33,266 --> 00:10:34,808 I-I don't know. 426 00:10:35,891 --> 00:10:38,141 What the hell 427 00:10:35,891 --> 00:10:38,141 was that, Kevin? 428 00:10:38,266 --> 00:10:39,391 We're all crazy just because 429 00:10:39,516 --> 00:10:40,891 I'm looking up some stuff 430 00:10:39,516 --> 00:10:40,891 on the Internet, 431 00:10:41,017 --> 00:10:42,891 and Barney wants 432 00:10:41,017 --> 00:10:42,891 to know the baby's gender? 433 00:10:43,017 --> 00:10:45,641 Well, to be honest, 434 00:10:45,766 --> 00:10:47,641 I noticed some 435 00:10:45,766 --> 00:10:47,641 other disturbing... 436 00:10:48,766 --> 00:10:50,266 Never mind. 437 00:10:50,391 --> 00:10:51,808 It's nothing. I'm sorry. 438 00:10:51,933 --> 00:10:53,433 I gots to know! 439 00:10:53,557 --> 00:10:55,808 Okay, last night alone... 440 00:10:55,933 --> 00:10:58,183 When-When are you coming back? 441 00:10:58,308 --> 00:11:00,557 Because I miss you, silly! 442 00:11:03,308 --> 00:11:04,308 Wait, who's he talking to? 443 00:11:04,433 --> 00:11:06,557 Shh, I'll be back soon. 444 00:11:06,683 --> 00:11:08,432 Yeah, you want me 445 00:11:06,683 --> 00:11:08,432 to bring you a pretzel? 446 00:11:11,017 --> 00:11:13,266 Ted's texting me 447 00:11:11,017 --> 00:11:13,266 from the bathroom. 448 00:11:14,516 --> 00:11:16,391 Oh. 449 00:11:14,516 --> 00:11:16,391 Oh. 450 00:11:14,516 --> 00:11:16,391 Oh. 451 00:11:16,516 --> 00:11:17,724 I don't get it. 452 00:11:17,850 --> 00:11:19,891 It's just a "C" 453 00:11:17,850 --> 00:11:19,891 with an apostrophe. 454 00:11:17,850 --> 00:11:19,891 Oh. 455 00:11:20,017 --> 00:11:21,183 Oh, yeah. 456 00:11:21,224 --> 00:11:23,266 Sometimes when one 457 00:11:21,224 --> 00:11:23,266 of us is on the can, 458 00:11:23,391 --> 00:11:25,808 we'll, uh, sneak a peek 459 00:11:23,391 --> 00:11:25,808 and then text each other, 460 00:11:25,933 --> 00:11:27,891 you know. 461 00:11:28,017 --> 00:11:31,516 Symbols to describe what your 462 00:11:28,017 --> 00:11:31,516 bowel movement looks like? 463 00:11:33,183 --> 00:11:36,891 This morning, 464 00:11:33,183 --> 00:11:36,891 I took an ampersand. 465 00:11:37,017 --> 00:11:38,516 Last summer, 466 00:11:37,017 --> 00:11:38,516 I dropped a deuce 467 00:11:38,641 --> 00:11:40,766 that actually looked 468 00:11:38,641 --> 00:11:40,766 like the number two! 469 00:11:43,641 --> 00:11:46,641 When you worked 470 00:11:43,641 --> 00:11:46,641 late Wednesday, 471 00:11:46,766 --> 00:11:50,891 I... I got 472 00:11:46,766 --> 00:11:50,891 lonely and... 473 00:11:51,017 --> 00:11:54,017 I watched Survivor 474 00:11:51,017 --> 00:11:54,017 without you. 475 00:11:56,183 --> 00:11:58,183 Practically the only unhealthy 476 00:11:56,183 --> 00:11:58,183 behavior I didn't see 477 00:11:58,266 --> 00:12:00,766 from you people 478 00:11:58,266 --> 00:12:00,766 was physical violence. 479 00:12:08,017 --> 00:12:09,266 Yeah. 480 00:12:09,390 --> 00:12:10,641 At least we don't do that. 481 00:12:12,017 --> 00:12:13,183 And to top it off, 482 00:12:13,266 --> 00:12:14,891 all the meddling 483 00:12:13,266 --> 00:12:14,891 in Ted's love life, 484 00:12:15,017 --> 00:12:16,390 not to mention Lily's pregnancy? 485 00:12:16,516 --> 00:12:19,641 It all strikes me as 486 00:12:16,516 --> 00:12:19,641 just deeply dysfunctional. 487 00:12:20,683 --> 00:12:22,891 So what you're saying is, 488 00:12:20,683 --> 00:12:22,891 we're fine? 489 00:12:26,017 --> 00:12:28,557 So, while this font is often 490 00:12:28,683 --> 00:12:30,557 mistaken for Helvetica, 491 00:12:30,683 --> 00:12:33,933 the fact is... 492 00:12:34,058 --> 00:12:36,766 it's Helvetica Bold. 493 00:12:37,766 --> 00:12:39,516 I can actually hear the sound 494 00:12:39,641 --> 00:12:42,183 of her vagina being boarded up. 495 00:12:43,891 --> 00:12:45,516 I got to be honest, Janet. 496 00:12:45,641 --> 00:12:48,516 First of all... 497 00:12:45,641 --> 00:12:48,516 this is Times New Roman. 498 00:12:49,516 --> 00:12:50,933 Second, I'm having trouble 499 00:12:51,058 --> 00:12:52,808 coming up with things 500 00:12:51,058 --> 00:12:52,808 to talk about. 501 00:12:52,933 --> 00:12:54,766 You? I'm sitting here thinking, 502 00:12:54,891 --> 00:12:57,933 "Damn it, I wish I had something 503 00:12:54,891 --> 00:12:57,933 as good as that font thing. 504 00:12:58,058 --> 00:12:59,390 That's gold." 505 00:12:59,516 --> 00:13:01,432 Guys, I'm so sorry 506 00:12:59,516 --> 00:13:01,432 I said anything. 507 00:13:01,557 --> 00:13:05,183 Um, you basically called 508 00:13:01,557 --> 00:13:05,183 my friends mentally ill. 509 00:13:05,266 --> 00:13:07,641 Yeah, you think some lame 510 00:13:05,266 --> 00:13:07,641 apology will fix that? 511 00:13:07,766 --> 00:13:10,308 What if I just paint the rest 512 00:13:07,766 --> 00:13:10,308 of the room by myself? 513 00:13:10,432 --> 00:13:12,641 Apology accepted. 514 00:13:12,766 --> 00:13:14,058 Okay, let's do this. 515 00:13:14,183 --> 00:13:15,683 Let-Let's find out 516 00:13:14,183 --> 00:13:15,683 each other's likes and dislikes. 517 00:13:15,808 --> 00:13:16,891 Start with something 518 00:13:15,808 --> 00:13:16,891 totally random. 519 00:13:17,017 --> 00:13:18,516 Like, um, oh, I don't know. 520 00:13:18,641 --> 00:13:21,266 Are you a fan of... 521 00:13:18,641 --> 00:13:21,266 I don't know... 522 00:13:21,390 --> 00:13:23,266 Annie Hall? 523 00:13:23,390 --> 00:13:26,183 I'm guessing that's not random 524 00:13:23,390 --> 00:13:26,183 at all, and you use that movie 525 00:13:26,307 --> 00:13:28,183 to test whether a girl is cool? 526 00:13:28,266 --> 00:13:29,891 No, it's-it's the first movie 527 00:13:28,266 --> 00:13:29,891 that popped into... 528 00:13:30,017 --> 00:13:31,641 I love Annie Hall. 529 00:13:30,017 --> 00:13:31,641 Oh, thank God you're cool. 530 00:13:31,766 --> 00:13:33,516 But just as things started 531 00:13:33,641 --> 00:13:35,432 to go well 532 00:13:33,641 --> 00:13:35,432 with Janet Mclntyre... 533 00:13:35,557 --> 00:13:37,766 Whoa. I just found 534 00:13:35,557 --> 00:13:37,766 Janet Mclntyre. 535 00:13:37,891 --> 00:13:39,891 The Janet Mclntyre. 536 00:13:46,390 --> 00:13:50,017 Sweet... mother... of God! 537 00:13:56,307 --> 00:13:57,891 Uh, well, I got to 538 00:13:56,307 --> 00:13:57,891 run to the restroom. 539 00:13:58,017 --> 00:14:00,183 No internet, Mister. 540 00:14:00,265 --> 00:14:01,766 If you find out my deep, dark 541 00:14:00,265 --> 00:14:01,766 secret, I'll have to kill you. 542 00:14:01,891 --> 00:14:03,390 It's just my friends 543 00:14:01,891 --> 00:14:03,390 checking up on me. 544 00:14:03,516 --> 00:14:05,307 I'll politely let them know 545 00:14:03,516 --> 00:14:05,307 we're having a lovely time. 546 00:14:05,432 --> 00:14:06,766 Okay. 547 00:14:08,307 --> 00:14:10,766 Ted says, "I'm not clicking on 548 00:14:08,307 --> 00:14:10,766 the link, so leave me alone." 549 00:14:10,891 --> 00:14:13,390 And then either texted me a 550 00:14:10,891 --> 00:14:13,390 bunch of symbols for profanity, 551 00:14:13,516 --> 00:14:14,641 or got food poisoning 552 00:14:14,766 --> 00:14:16,557 and dropped the weirdest deuce 553 00:14:14,766 --> 00:14:16,557 of all time. 554 00:14:16,683 --> 00:14:18,516 You guys have 555 00:14:16,683 --> 00:14:18,516 to see this. 556 00:14:18,641 --> 00:14:20,390 No. We're with 557 00:14:18,641 --> 00:14:20,390 Ted on this. 558 00:14:20,516 --> 00:14:22,265 We don't want to 559 00:14:20,516 --> 00:14:22,265 find out about Janet, 560 00:14:22,390 --> 00:14:24,933 just like we don't want to 561 00:14:22,390 --> 00:14:24,933 find out about the baby. 562 00:14:25,058 --> 00:14:26,265 Because we like mystery, 563 00:14:26,390 --> 00:14:28,390 whether it's the hairy 564 00:14:26,390 --> 00:14:28,390 majesty of Bigfoot, 565 00:14:28,516 --> 00:14:31,432 or the bloodsucking ferocity 566 00:14:28,516 --> 00:14:31,432 of the Chupacabra, 567 00:14:31,557 --> 00:14:33,390 or the gender 568 00:14:31,557 --> 00:14:33,390 of our little miracle. 569 00:14:33,516 --> 00:14:34,683 Thanks for putting 570 00:14:33,516 --> 00:14:34,683 those together 571 00:14:34,808 --> 00:14:36,017 in the same 572 00:14:34,808 --> 00:14:36,017 sentence, sweetie. 573 00:14:36,183 --> 00:14:37,432 Mm. 574 00:14:37,557 --> 00:14:40,183 Look, if you guys don't want 575 00:14:37,557 --> 00:14:40,183 to know, how about this? 576 00:14:40,265 --> 00:14:42,641 Let me look, 577 00:14:40,265 --> 00:14:42,641 and I won't tell you. 578 00:14:42,766 --> 00:14:44,432 Absolutely not. 579 00:14:42,766 --> 00:14:44,432 Fine. 580 00:14:45,516 --> 00:14:46,390 Baby, if it will shut him up, 581 00:14:46,516 --> 00:14:47,516 what's the harm? 582 00:14:49,641 --> 00:14:51,641 Can I...? 583 00:14:56,808 --> 00:14:58,683 This may have been a mistake. 584 00:14:58,808 --> 00:15:00,516 Boy! 585 00:15:00,641 --> 00:15:01,766 Do I like babies! 586 00:15:02,766 --> 00:15:03,390 Girl! 587 00:15:04,058 --> 00:15:05,183 friend, 588 00:15:05,265 --> 00:15:06,766 your hair looks 589 00:15:05,265 --> 00:15:06,766 fantastic! 590 00:15:07,390 --> 00:15:09,058 Twins! 591 00:15:09,183 --> 00:15:11,265 was the feel-good movie of 1988. 592 00:15:11,390 --> 00:15:13,891 Okay, Barney, hey, it doesn't 593 00:15:11,390 --> 00:15:13,891 matter what you guys say. 594 00:15:14,017 --> 00:15:15,183 We're not gonna cave. 595 00:15:15,265 --> 00:15:16,557 Yes, we are! 596 00:15:16,683 --> 00:15:18,557 Oh, just open 597 00:15:16,683 --> 00:15:18,557 your eyes. 598 00:15:18,683 --> 00:15:21,017 This gender-neutral 599 00:15:18,683 --> 00:15:21,017 yellow is horrible! 600 00:15:21,182 --> 00:15:23,516 We're clearly gonna paint 601 00:15:21,182 --> 00:15:23,516 over the whole thing! 602 00:15:23,641 --> 00:15:25,516 That's what you want to hear. 603 00:15:25,641 --> 00:15:26,933 I gots to know! 604 00:15:27,058 --> 00:15:28,557 Yeah. 605 00:15:28,683 --> 00:15:31,017 "It's a..." 606 00:15:31,182 --> 00:15:33,017 It's a... 607 00:15:33,182 --> 00:15:34,641 Where is the rest 608 00:15:33,182 --> 00:15:34,641 of the card? 609 00:15:34,766 --> 00:15:36,390 I ripped it in half. 610 00:15:36,516 --> 00:15:38,307 I knew you'd be 611 00:15:36,516 --> 00:15:38,307 desperate to see it, 612 00:15:38,432 --> 00:15:39,808 and I'll give it to you. 613 00:15:39,933 --> 00:15:42,891 All you have to do is admit 614 00:15:39,933 --> 00:15:42,891 that mystery is stupid 615 00:15:43,017 --> 00:15:46,390 by reading 616 00:15:43,017 --> 00:15:46,390 about Janet Mclntyre. 617 00:15:46,516 --> 00:15:48,058 This is in no way 618 00:15:46,516 --> 00:15:48,058 emotional extortion. 619 00:15:48,182 --> 00:15:49,390 You guys are great. 620 00:15:49,516 --> 00:15:51,516 Fine, we'll look 621 00:15:49,516 --> 00:15:51,516 at your laptop. 622 00:15:53,182 --> 00:15:55,390 Sweet... 623 00:15:55,516 --> 00:15:57,933 mother... of God. 624 00:15:59,683 --> 00:16:01,307 I can't really see 625 00:15:59,683 --> 00:16:01,307 the computer screen. 626 00:16:01,432 --> 00:16:03,265 It just went down 627 00:16:01,432 --> 00:16:03,265 the wrong pipe. 628 00:16:05,891 --> 00:16:07,766 Whoa. 629 00:16:07,891 --> 00:16:10,182 If Lily and Marshall want me 630 00:16:07,891 --> 00:16:10,182 to click on it, 631 00:16:10,265 --> 00:16:12,683 maybe Janet really does have 632 00:16:10,265 --> 00:16:12,683 a deep, dark secret. 633 00:16:13,808 --> 00:16:15,182 What's going on? 634 00:16:15,265 --> 00:16:16,265 I'm a prostitute. 635 00:16:16,390 --> 00:16:17,265 You didn't think I was 636 00:16:17,390 --> 00:16:18,390 actually into you, did you? 637 00:16:18,516 --> 00:16:19,808 Sort of. 638 00:16:22,058 --> 00:16:24,017 Get it together, Mosby. 639 00:16:26,766 --> 00:16:28,017 Oh. 640 00:16:29,516 --> 00:16:31,265 You don't buy beer, 641 00:16:29,516 --> 00:16:31,265 you rent it. 642 00:16:31,390 --> 00:16:32,766 Am I right? 643 00:16:32,891 --> 00:16:34,182 This is the 644 00:16:32,891 --> 00:16:34,182 men's room. 645 00:16:34,265 --> 00:16:35,683 I know. 646 00:16:35,808 --> 00:16:36,641 I'm a dude. 647 00:16:46,182 --> 00:16:49,017 Listen, there's something 648 00:16:46,182 --> 00:16:49,017 you should know. 649 00:16:49,182 --> 00:16:51,307 I lied. 650 00:16:51,432 --> 00:16:53,182 I only kind of liked Annie Hall. 651 00:16:57,432 --> 00:17:00,182 I gots to know! 652 00:17:04,766 --> 00:17:06,641 Sweet... 653 00:17:06,766 --> 00:17:09,307 mother... of God. 654 00:17:18,766 --> 00:17:20,766 Hey. 655 00:17:25,808 --> 00:17:27,641 Ted, are you okay? 656 00:17:25,808 --> 00:17:27,641 You look freaked out. 657 00:17:27,766 --> 00:17:30,307 I'm not freaked out. 658 00:17:30,432 --> 00:17:32,766 I was freaked out. Why? 659 00:17:32,891 --> 00:17:35,683 'Cause I had just discovered 660 00:17:32,891 --> 00:17:35,683 that Janet Mclntyre was... 661 00:17:35,808 --> 00:17:37,808 amazing! 662 00:17:59,390 --> 00:18:03,182 And just like that, 663 00:17:59,390 --> 00:18:03,182 the wall went up. 664 00:18:03,265 --> 00:18:05,182 Okay, he looked at 665 00:18:03,265 --> 00:18:05,182 Janet Mclntyre's 666 00:18:05,307 --> 00:18:07,057 Internet 667 00:18:05,307 --> 00:18:07,057 extravaganza. 668 00:18:07,182 --> 00:18:09,016 Here's the other half 669 00:18:07,182 --> 00:18:09,016 of the card. 670 00:18:15,016 --> 00:18:16,808 Wait. Should we 671 00:18:15,016 --> 00:18:16,808 do this? I... 672 00:18:16,933 --> 00:18:19,182 I don't know. 673 00:18:16,933 --> 00:18:19,182 I mean, my soul says no, 674 00:18:19,307 --> 00:18:21,766 but these hideous 675 00:18:19,307 --> 00:18:21,766 yellow walls scream yes. 676 00:18:21,891 --> 00:18:24,516 Should I just stop, or...? 677 00:18:24,641 --> 00:18:27,182 Sweet mother of God! 678 00:18:27,223 --> 00:18:30,390 A dog in Ottawa ran all the way 679 00:18:27,223 --> 00:18:30,390 to Saskatoon! 680 00:18:31,390 --> 00:18:32,516 What? 681 00:18:32,641 --> 00:18:33,766 We figured out the Janet thing. 682 00:18:33,891 --> 00:18:35,057 I'm catching up on Canada. 683 00:18:38,933 --> 00:18:40,641 You're with me on this, right? 684 00:18:40,766 --> 00:18:43,390 Otherwise, I can go down, 685 00:18:40,766 --> 00:18:43,390 and I can get the card. 686 00:18:43,516 --> 00:18:44,182 Absolutely. 687 00:18:44,265 --> 00:18:46,057 Oh, thank you. 688 00:18:48,557 --> 00:18:50,516 And so the gender 689 00:18:48,557 --> 00:18:50,516 remained a secret, 690 00:18:50,641 --> 00:18:53,891 but Janet Mclntyre's life 691 00:18:50,641 --> 00:18:53,891 no longer was. 692 00:18:54,016 --> 00:18:55,808 There was only one problem. 693 00:18:55,933 --> 00:18:57,390 Ted, what's going on? 694 00:18:57,516 --> 00:19:00,182 Nothing. 695 00:19:00,223 --> 00:19:02,307 Did I mention 696 00:19:00,223 --> 00:19:02,307 that I'm the youngest architect 697 00:19:02,432 --> 00:19:04,641 in New York history 698 00:19:02,432 --> 00:19:04,641 to have a skyscraper built? 699 00:19:04,766 --> 00:19:06,516 Oh. 700 00:19:04,766 --> 00:19:06,516 So, I'm not quite 701 00:19:06,641 --> 00:19:08,933 as far beneath you 702 00:19:06,641 --> 00:19:08,933 as you might think. 703 00:19:09,057 --> 00:19:11,016 Why would I think that? 704 00:19:11,182 --> 00:19:13,390 No reason, but this one time 705 00:19:11,182 --> 00:19:13,390 in sixth grade, 706 00:19:13,516 --> 00:19:16,390 I saw a raccoon trapped 707 00:19:13,516 --> 00:19:16,390 in a gutter, and I told my dad, 708 00:19:16,516 --> 00:19:18,265 and the firemen came 709 00:19:16,516 --> 00:19:18,265 and got it out, 710 00:19:18,390 --> 00:19:21,182 so it's not like I pulled a baby 711 00:19:18,390 --> 00:19:21,182 from a creek or anything, 712 00:19:21,265 --> 00:19:22,683 but at least 713 00:19:21,265 --> 00:19:22,683 I didn't ignore it 714 00:19:22,808 --> 00:19:25,432 and keep lighting bugs on fire 715 00:19:22,808 --> 00:19:25,432 with my magnifying glass. 716 00:19:25,557 --> 00:19:27,516 We had one promise, 717 00:19:25,557 --> 00:19:27,516 and you broke it. 718 00:19:27,641 --> 00:19:29,432 What are you talking about? 719 00:19:29,557 --> 00:19:31,307 You looked me up, and now 720 00:19:29,557 --> 00:19:31,307 you find me intimidating. 721 00:19:31,432 --> 00:19:33,557 Why-Why would I find you 722 00:19:31,432 --> 00:19:33,557 intimidating, okay? 723 00:19:33,683 --> 00:19:35,766 It's not like 724 00:19:33,683 --> 00:19:35,766 I donated a kidney, 725 00:19:35,891 --> 00:19:37,057 but I donated blood once, 726 00:19:37,182 --> 00:19:38,390 although I wound up fainting, 727 00:19:38,516 --> 00:19:40,432 and they had to put it 728 00:19:38,516 --> 00:19:40,432 all back in. 729 00:19:40,557 --> 00:19:42,641 I was so excited about this. 730 00:19:42,766 --> 00:19:45,891 But now you're just a blubbering 731 00:19:42,766 --> 00:19:45,891 idiot like the rest of them. 732 00:19:46,016 --> 00:19:47,516 No, I ain't! 733 00:19:47,641 --> 00:19:50,516 I mean, no, I never do 734 00:19:47,641 --> 00:19:50,516 that thing you says. 735 00:19:51,766 --> 00:19:53,390 What I mean is, 736 00:19:51,766 --> 00:19:53,390 you gooder than me 737 00:19:53,516 --> 00:19:56,390 no make difference! 738 00:19:56,516 --> 00:19:58,808 And that's that. 739 00:19:58,932 --> 00:20:01,182 I wish to God I'd never 740 00:19:58,932 --> 00:20:01,182 clicked on that link. 741 00:20:01,307 --> 00:20:02,641 I'm sorry, Ted. 742 00:20:02,766 --> 00:20:04,557 We were just 743 00:20:02,766 --> 00:20:04,557 trying to help. 744 00:20:04,683 --> 00:20:06,891 I said it was meddling 745 00:20:04,683 --> 00:20:06,891 and manipulative, 746 00:20:07,016 --> 00:20:08,890 but Kevin insisted we butt in. 747 00:20:12,641 --> 00:20:13,932 No, it's my fault. 748 00:20:14,057 --> 00:20:15,641 I never should have looked. 749 00:20:15,766 --> 00:20:18,390 In the battle 750 00:20:15,766 --> 00:20:18,390 of mystery versus history, 751 00:20:18,516 --> 00:20:20,390 it's best 752 00:20:18,516 --> 00:20:20,390 not to know. 753 00:20:20,516 --> 00:20:23,016 Lily Pad? 754 00:20:23,140 --> 00:20:24,516 What? 755 00:20:24,641 --> 00:20:26,890 We're having a boy. 756 00:20:28,182 --> 00:20:30,182 We're having a boy. 757 00:20:30,307 --> 00:20:31,557 We're having a boy! 758 00:20:30,307 --> 00:20:31,557 You're having a boy! 759 00:20:31,683 --> 00:20:33,641 We're having a... 760 00:20:31,683 --> 00:20:33,641 we're having a boy. 761 00:20:33,766 --> 00:20:35,057 We're having 762 00:20:33,766 --> 00:20:35,057 a boy. 763 00:20:35,182 --> 00:20:36,390 We're having 764 00:20:35,182 --> 00:20:36,390 a boy. 765 00:20:36,516 --> 00:20:38,683 I'll go buy 766 00:20:36,516 --> 00:20:38,683 some blue paint. 767 00:20:48,390 --> 00:20:50,265 It needs sharpening. 768 00:20:50,390 --> 00:20:53,808 You see? I told you three days 769 00:20:50,390 --> 00:20:53,808 would go by in no time. 770 00:20:53,932 --> 00:20:55,516 Phineas, take us up! 771 00:20:55,641 --> 00:20:56,932 Well, in case 772 00:20:55,641 --> 00:20:56,932 you were wondering, 773 00:20:57,057 --> 00:20:59,265 it rained the entire time 774 00:20:57,057 --> 00:20:59,265 I was in the Caribbean. 775 00:20:59,390 --> 00:21:02,808 Thank you for asking.