1 00:00:01,927 --> 00:00:03,718 Kids, on New Year's Day 2012, 2 00:00:03,844 --> 00:00:05,593 Uncle Marshall took a trip 3 00:00:03,844 --> 00:00:05,593 to Minnesota 4 00:00:05,718 --> 00:00:07,468 to see someone he truly missed. 5 00:00:12,468 --> 00:00:14,593 Hey, Pop. 6 00:00:14,718 --> 00:00:16,844 I can't believe 7 00:00:14,718 --> 00:00:16,844 it's been a year. 8 00:00:16,969 --> 00:00:19,844 I think the most appropriate way 9 00:00:19,969 --> 00:00:23,178 to honor your memory today... 10 00:00:23,301 --> 00:00:24,551 is to get blasted 11 00:00:24,677 --> 00:00:26,468 and watch the Vikings 12 00:00:24,677 --> 00:00:26,468 make the Bears 13 00:00:26,593 --> 00:00:27,677 their furry little bitches. 14 00:00:27,802 --> 00:00:29,593 Go, Vikes! 15 00:00:27,802 --> 00:00:29,593 Shh. 16 00:00:29,718 --> 00:00:31,301 Sorry for your loss. 17 00:00:31,426 --> 00:00:33,844 Which is what 18 00:00:31,426 --> 00:00:33,844 we'll be saying to the Bears 19 00:00:33,969 --> 00:00:35,426 in about three hours, 20 00:00:33,969 --> 00:00:35,426 right, Pop? 21 00:00:35,551 --> 00:00:38,094 Kids, tailgating 22 00:00:35,551 --> 00:00:38,094 at the Vikings-Bears game 23 00:00:38,219 --> 00:00:40,927 was a tradition 24 00:00:38,219 --> 00:00:40,927 for Uncle Marshall and his dad. 25 00:00:41,052 --> 00:00:42,426 That's how 26 00:00:41,052 --> 00:00:42,426 the government 27 00:00:42,551 --> 00:00:45,052 covered up the UFO crash 28 00:00:42,551 --> 00:00:45,052 in Roswell: 29 00:00:45,178 --> 00:00:48,593 by canning the sliced up 30 00:00:45,178 --> 00:00:48,593 alien carcasses 31 00:00:48,718 --> 00:00:51,301 and calling it Spam. 32 00:00:52,301 --> 00:00:55,551 AKA sliced processed alien meat. 33 00:00:55,677 --> 00:00:56,844 Wow. 34 00:00:56,969 --> 00:00:59,178 Is there anything 35 00:00:56,969 --> 00:00:59,178 you don't know, Dad? 36 00:00:59,301 --> 00:01:00,510 No. 37 00:01:00,635 --> 00:01:02,218 I know most stuff. 38 00:01:02,343 --> 00:01:04,718 And in your honor... 39 00:01:04,844 --> 00:01:08,593 three decades of pork fat, 40 00:01:04,844 --> 00:01:08,593 lighter fluid and Bengay. 41 00:01:10,052 --> 00:01:13,343 Dear God, that's the stuff. 42 00:01:13,426 --> 00:01:16,052 So much to catch you up on. 43 00:01:16,178 --> 00:01:19,094 So, last night 44 00:01:16,178 --> 00:01:19,094 was New Year's Eve. 45 00:01:19,218 --> 00:01:21,178 That's a crazy story. 46 00:01:21,343 --> 00:01:23,551 So you haven't told your dad 47 00:01:21,343 --> 00:01:23,551 that you're pregnant yet? 48 00:01:23,677 --> 00:01:26,177 No. But why should I? 49 00:01:26,343 --> 00:01:27,969 My dad has never 50 00:01:26,343 --> 00:01:27,969 been there for me. 51 00:01:28,094 --> 00:01:30,593 This is just another chance 52 00:01:28,094 --> 00:01:30,593 for him to let me down. 53 00:01:30,718 --> 00:01:33,551 Lily, you have to tell him. 54 00:01:33,677 --> 00:01:36,593 He's at some board game 55 00:01:33,677 --> 00:01:36,593 convention in Chicago. 56 00:01:36,718 --> 00:01:39,177 He's your dad. 57 00:01:39,343 --> 00:01:40,927 I don't see why people 58 00:01:39,343 --> 00:01:40,927 aren't getting this. 59 00:01:41,052 --> 00:01:42,218 Shoplifter 60 00:01:41,052 --> 00:01:42,218 does not promote crime. 61 00:01:42,343 --> 00:01:44,969 It celebrates it. 62 00:01:45,094 --> 00:01:46,593 Excuse me. 63 00:01:46,718 --> 00:01:47,927 Yeah. 64 00:01:48,052 --> 00:01:49,551 Hey, Dad. 65 00:01:49,677 --> 00:01:53,177 I'm, uh, calling with 66 00:01:49,677 --> 00:01:53,177 some pretty big news. 67 00:01:53,343 --> 00:01:54,969 I'm pregnant. 68 00:01:55,094 --> 00:01:56,802 Great. Thanks. 69 00:02:12,052 --> 00:02:14,052 Anyway, Dad, Ted and Barney's 70 00:02:12,052 --> 00:02:14,052 New Year's Eve 71 00:02:14,177 --> 00:02:16,218 wasn't off 72 00:02:14,177 --> 00:02:16,218 to a great start, either. 73 00:02:16,343 --> 00:02:17,802 Hey. Whoa, whoa, whoa, 74 00:02:16,343 --> 00:02:17,802 whoa. It's 50 bucks, 75 00:02:17,927 --> 00:02:19,052 and the line 76 00:02:17,927 --> 00:02:19,052 starts out there. 77 00:02:19,177 --> 00:02:20,969 Uh, we're regulars. 78 00:02:19,177 --> 00:02:20,969 Oh, in that case, 79 00:02:21,094 --> 00:02:22,927 the line starts out there, 80 00:02:21,094 --> 00:02:22,927 and it's 50 bucks. 81 00:02:23,052 --> 00:02:24,802 You got a problem 82 00:02:23,052 --> 00:02:24,802 with that? 83 00:02:24,927 --> 00:02:27,426 Kids, here's why we didn't have 84 00:02:24,927 --> 00:02:27,426 a problem with that. 85 00:02:29,218 --> 00:02:32,094 And he was even scarier 86 00:02:29,218 --> 00:02:32,094 without the toupee. 87 00:02:32,218 --> 00:02:33,677 No problem. 88 00:02:32,218 --> 00:02:33,677 It's a little drafty. 89 00:02:33,802 --> 00:02:35,343 We'll get you 90 00:02:33,802 --> 00:02:35,343 a nice hot cocoa. 91 00:02:38,343 --> 00:02:40,052 Check it out. 92 00:02:40,177 --> 00:02:42,468 Sandy Rivers' 93 00:02:40,177 --> 00:02:42,468 New Year's Eve show. 94 00:02:42,593 --> 00:02:44,718 Thank God 95 00:02:42,593 --> 00:02:44,718 I don't have to produce 96 00:02:44,844 --> 00:02:45,927 this frozen pile 97 00:02:44,844 --> 00:02:45,927 of poo. 98 00:02:46,052 --> 00:02:47,343 How'd you dodge 99 00:02:46,052 --> 00:02:47,343 that bullet? 100 00:02:47,426 --> 00:02:50,426 Well, maybe Tina, 101 00:02:47,426 --> 00:02:50,426 the producer, he, uh, picked, 102 00:02:50,551 --> 00:02:51,969 is more talented 103 00:02:50,551 --> 00:02:51,969 than I am... 104 00:02:52,093 --> 00:02:54,844 at lying down while Sandy 105 00:02:52,093 --> 00:02:54,844 does his business on her. 106 00:02:54,969 --> 00:02:56,969 Does it bother you 107 00:02:54,969 --> 00:02:56,969 that this pervert's 108 00:02:57,093 --> 00:02:58,468 on the air, 109 00:02:57,093 --> 00:02:58,468 and you're not anymore? 110 00:02:58,593 --> 00:02:59,802 Do you miss it? 111 00:03:01,384 --> 00:03:04,218 What? Why would... 112 00:03:01,384 --> 00:03:04,218 why would I miss it? 113 00:03:04,343 --> 00:03:06,426 No. I would rather 114 00:03:06,551 --> 00:03:09,551 be warm and cozy 115 00:03:06,551 --> 00:03:09,551 here in denial... my apartment. 116 00:03:09,677 --> 00:03:11,052 Robin, 117 00:03:09,677 --> 00:03:11,052 I'm no therapist... 118 00:03:11,177 --> 00:03:12,927 wait, yes, I am... 119 00:03:13,052 --> 00:03:15,718 but I've got a New Year's 120 00:03:13,052 --> 00:03:15,718 resolution for you. 121 00:03:15,844 --> 00:03:17,343 Get back on camera. 122 00:03:17,426 --> 00:03:20,426 Mine was going to be "make 123 00:03:17,426 --> 00:03:20,426 a sex tape," so... two birds. 124 00:03:22,052 --> 00:03:23,802 Hold that thought. 125 00:03:23,927 --> 00:03:25,551 Hello? 126 00:03:25,677 --> 00:03:26,927 Sandy? 127 00:03:27,052 --> 00:03:28,343 Tina quit. 128 00:03:28,426 --> 00:03:30,677 The woman I love just quit. 129 00:03:30,802 --> 00:03:32,802 Love? 130 00:03:30,802 --> 00:03:32,802 She's my everything, Robin. 131 00:03:32,927 --> 00:03:36,426 My sun, my stars, my oxygen. 132 00:03:36,551 --> 00:03:39,093 Plus, she likes it 133 00:03:36,551 --> 00:03:39,093 fast and dirty, 134 00:03:39,218 --> 00:03:41,343 and that's how Sandy rides. 135 00:03:41,426 --> 00:03:43,343 I need you here ASAP: 136 00:03:43,426 --> 00:03:44,593 Are you kidding me? 137 00:03:44,718 --> 00:03:46,093 Marcus? 138 00:03:46,218 --> 00:03:47,551 What the heck 139 00:03:46,218 --> 00:03:47,551 are you doing here? 140 00:03:47,677 --> 00:03:49,426 What the heck are you 141 00:03:47,677 --> 00:03:49,426 doing here? 142 00:03:49,551 --> 00:03:52,677 I wanted to see Dad today... 143 00:03:49,551 --> 00:03:52,677 in private. 144 00:03:52,802 --> 00:03:54,343 Well, I had the same idea, 145 00:03:54,468 --> 00:03:57,551 and I drove all the way 146 00:03:54,468 --> 00:03:57,551 from Mom's, so get lost. 147 00:03:57,677 --> 00:03:59,969 I flew here, so you get lost. 148 00:04:00,093 --> 00:04:02,218 Um, I'm trying to have 149 00:04:00,093 --> 00:04:02,218 a poignant moment 150 00:04:02,343 --> 00:04:05,177 with our departed father, 151 00:04:02,343 --> 00:04:05,177 turd face. 152 00:04:05,343 --> 00:04:07,051 Well, I'm trying 153 00:04:05,343 --> 00:04:07,051 to feel Dad's spirit 154 00:04:07,177 --> 00:04:09,468 flow through my soul, 155 00:04:07,177 --> 00:04:09,468 butt breath. 156 00:04:09,593 --> 00:04:11,177 I'm reaching out to the beyond 157 00:04:11,343 --> 00:04:13,927 to touch Dad's inner light, 158 00:04:11,343 --> 00:04:13,927 ass clown. 159 00:04:14,051 --> 00:04:17,343 I hear Dad's voice 160 00:04:14,051 --> 00:04:17,343 like an ethereal song 161 00:04:17,426 --> 00:04:20,468 guiding me toward salvation, 162 00:04:17,426 --> 00:04:20,468 douche nozzle. 163 00:04:21,677 --> 00:04:23,551 Dibs on Dad. 164 00:04:21,677 --> 00:04:23,551 Dibs on Dad 165 00:04:21,677 --> 00:04:23,551 times infinity. 166 00:04:23,677 --> 00:04:24,802 Oh! 167 00:04:23,677 --> 00:04:24,802 Ooh. 168 00:04:24,927 --> 00:04:26,677 I'll just pretend 169 00:04:24,927 --> 00:04:26,677 like you're not here. 170 00:04:28,177 --> 00:04:29,343 What? 171 00:04:29,426 --> 00:04:31,426 Dad, do you hear something? 172 00:04:31,551 --> 00:04:35,343 Perhaps the high-pitched whine 173 00:04:31,551 --> 00:04:35,343 of someone who wet their bed 174 00:04:35,468 --> 00:04:36,969 until they were 11! 175 00:04:37,093 --> 00:04:38,093 Ten. 176 00:04:39,343 --> 00:04:43,343 Anyway, Dad, since it's just 177 00:04:39,343 --> 00:04:43,343 the two of us... 178 00:04:44,927 --> 00:04:46,927 Lily and I 179 00:04:44,927 --> 00:04:46,927 were going to spend New Year's 180 00:04:47,051 --> 00:04:48,343 unpacking the baby room. 181 00:04:48,468 --> 00:04:51,468 Um, sweetie, why 182 00:04:48,468 --> 00:04:51,468 is this book in here? 183 00:04:51,593 --> 00:04:53,218 That's Enigmas of The Mystical. 184 00:04:53,343 --> 00:04:54,343 It's all about 185 00:04:53,343 --> 00:04:54,343 mysterious 186 00:04:54,468 --> 00:04:55,844 and unexplained phenomena. 187 00:04:55,968 --> 00:04:58,718 Don't you remember the TV 188 00:04:55,968 --> 00:04:58,718 commercials from the '80s? 189 00:04:58,844 --> 00:05:00,927 June 17th, 1983. 190 00:05:01,051 --> 00:05:02,677 Tempe, Arizona. 191 00:05:02,802 --> 00:05:04,802 A woman makes 192 00:05:02,802 --> 00:05:04,802 a chicken salad sandwich. 193 00:05:04,927 --> 00:05:06,844 Chicken salad sandwich. 194 00:05:06,968 --> 00:05:08,677 Halfway across the country 195 00:05:06,968 --> 00:05:08,677 in Michigan, 196 00:05:08,802 --> 00:05:10,343 her daughter 197 00:05:08,802 --> 00:05:10,343 is compelled to make 198 00:05:10,468 --> 00:05:13,343 almost exactly 199 00:05:10,468 --> 00:05:13,343 the same sandwich. 200 00:05:13,468 --> 00:05:14,677 Tuna salad. 201 00:05:14,802 --> 00:05:16,177 Coincidence? 202 00:05:16,343 --> 00:05:18,802 Or an enigma of the mystical! 203 00:05:20,677 --> 00:05:24,177 Yeah, those enigmas 204 00:05:20,677 --> 00:05:24,177 always seemed a bit thin to me. 205 00:05:24,343 --> 00:05:27,177 Thin? 206 00:05:24,343 --> 00:05:27,177 Lily, this is 200 pages 207 00:05:27,343 --> 00:05:30,718 of detailed accounts 208 00:05:27,343 --> 00:05:30,718 about Bigfoot, ghosts, 209 00:05:30,844 --> 00:05:33,051 aliens abducting people from 210 00:05:30,844 --> 00:05:33,051 their beds and probing them. 211 00:05:33,177 --> 00:05:34,802 I'm going to read it 212 00:05:33,177 --> 00:05:34,802 to Baby Eriksen 213 00:05:34,926 --> 00:05:36,051 at night-night. 214 00:05:36,177 --> 00:05:37,926 You really want 215 00:05:36,177 --> 00:05:37,926 to read our kid 216 00:05:38,051 --> 00:05:39,551 bedtime stories about monsters? 217 00:05:39,677 --> 00:05:41,426 First of all, 218 00:05:39,677 --> 00:05:41,426 I wouldn't use the "M" word. 219 00:05:41,551 --> 00:05:42,677 Only they can call 220 00:05:41,551 --> 00:05:42,677 themselves that. 221 00:05:42,802 --> 00:05:44,051 And secondly, 222 00:05:42,802 --> 00:05:44,051 are you really saying 223 00:05:44,177 --> 00:05:46,177 you don't want to raise 224 00:05:44,177 --> 00:05:46,177 our child as a believer? 225 00:05:46,343 --> 00:05:48,177 I don't want 226 00:05:46,343 --> 00:05:48,177 to brainwash our child 227 00:05:48,343 --> 00:05:49,677 to believe in something 228 00:05:48,343 --> 00:05:49,677 with no proof. 229 00:05:49,802 --> 00:05:51,426 It's not about proof; 230 00:05:49,802 --> 00:05:51,426 it's about faith. 231 00:05:51,551 --> 00:05:53,677 Faith is what gives life 232 00:05:51,551 --> 00:05:53,677 shape and meaning. 233 00:05:53,802 --> 00:05:55,593 I mean, if there aren't yetis 234 00:05:53,802 --> 00:05:55,593 or leprechauns, 235 00:05:55,718 --> 00:05:57,593 what's the point of even 236 00:05:55,718 --> 00:05:57,593 getting up in the morning? 237 00:05:57,718 --> 00:05:59,051 I don't know. 238 00:05:59,177 --> 00:06:01,593 Wife, unborn child, 239 00:05:59,177 --> 00:06:01,593 drop a deuce? 240 00:06:01,718 --> 00:06:04,926 Lily, don't you think 241 00:06:01,718 --> 00:06:04,926 it's a bit narcissistic 242 00:06:05,051 --> 00:06:08,218 not to allow for something 243 00:06:05,051 --> 00:06:08,218 bigger than us out there? 244 00:06:08,343 --> 00:06:10,593 Something whose 245 00:06:08,343 --> 00:06:10,593 beauty and power 246 00:06:10,718 --> 00:06:12,926 and majesty humbles us? 247 00:06:13,051 --> 00:06:14,551 God? 248 00:06:13,051 --> 00:06:14,551 Werewolves. 249 00:06:17,677 --> 00:06:20,177 So, as the countdown 250 00:06:17,677 --> 00:06:20,177 to 212 continues, 251 00:06:20,343 --> 00:06:21,968 a quick warning, America: 252 00:06:22,093 --> 00:06:24,968 Tina Henderson 253 00:06:22,093 --> 00:06:24,968 is a soulless bitch 254 00:06:25,093 --> 00:06:28,051 who will stomp on your heart. 255 00:06:28,177 --> 00:06:30,343 I need you back, Tina. 256 00:06:30,468 --> 00:06:32,218 I love you. 257 00:06:32,343 --> 00:06:34,926 Well, if that's as bad 258 00:06:32,343 --> 00:06:34,926 as it gets, we might be okay. 259 00:06:35,051 --> 00:06:37,051 Bathroom break. 260 00:06:39,677 --> 00:06:40,718 Oh, good. 261 00:06:40,844 --> 00:06:43,051 It's on the Jumbotron. 262 00:06:43,177 --> 00:06:44,551 Oh, finally. 263 00:06:44,677 --> 00:06:45,802 Yeah, that'll be 264 00:06:44,677 --> 00:06:45,802 100 bucks each. 265 00:06:45,926 --> 00:06:47,677 What? You said 50. 266 00:06:47,802 --> 00:06:49,802 That was before 267 00:06:47,802 --> 00:06:49,802 the place got crowded. 268 00:06:49,926 --> 00:06:50,926 Okay? It's 269 00:06:49,926 --> 00:06:50,926 New Year's Eve. 270 00:06:51,051 --> 00:06:52,218 People get rowdy 271 00:06:51,051 --> 00:06:52,218 and break stuff. 272 00:06:52,343 --> 00:06:53,468 The cover protects us. 273 00:06:53,593 --> 00:06:55,926 Plus, you get these 274 00:06:53,593 --> 00:06:55,926 festive hats. 275 00:06:56,051 --> 00:06:57,843 For an additional 276 00:06:56,051 --> 00:06:57,843 15 bucks. 277 00:06:57,968 --> 00:06:59,802 They're wet. 278 00:06:59,926 --> 00:07:01,343 Dry ones are 20. 279 00:07:01,426 --> 00:07:02,926 That's it. 280 00:07:03,051 --> 00:07:04,551 Don't bother, 281 00:07:03,051 --> 00:07:04,551 everybody. 282 00:07:04,677 --> 00:07:06,051 MacLaren's is a rip-off! 283 00:07:06,177 --> 00:07:07,343 You'd all be better off 284 00:07:07,426 --> 00:07:09,593 coming upstairs 285 00:07:07,426 --> 00:07:09,593 to my place for a beer. 286 00:07:09,718 --> 00:07:11,802 Hey, dude. You serious? 287 00:07:12,926 --> 00:07:16,551 Ted, do you remember 288 00:07:12,926 --> 00:07:16,551 a couple years ago, 289 00:07:16,677 --> 00:07:19,802 we had the best idea 290 00:07:16,677 --> 00:07:19,802 of all time? 291 00:07:19,926 --> 00:07:21,177 We should buy a bar. 292 00:07:21,343 --> 00:07:23,677 Of course! We should buy a bar! 293 00:07:23,802 --> 00:07:25,426 The name of 294 00:07:23,802 --> 00:07:25,426 our bar? 295 00:07:25,551 --> 00:07:27,968 Puzzles. 296 00:07:28,093 --> 00:07:30,218 People will be like, 297 00:07:28,093 --> 00:07:30,218 "Why is it called Puzzles?" 298 00:07:30,343 --> 00:07:32,843 That's the puzzle. 299 00:07:32,968 --> 00:07:35,677 A bar where no 300 00:07:32,968 --> 00:07:35,677 one's overcharged, 301 00:07:35,802 --> 00:07:38,677 where everyone feels 302 00:07:35,802 --> 00:07:38,677 valued and respected. 303 00:07:38,801 --> 00:07:40,426 A bar... 304 00:07:40,551 --> 00:07:43,343 where we get chicks drunk 305 00:07:40,551 --> 00:07:43,343 and bang them. 306 00:07:43,468 --> 00:07:45,218 We're opening 307 00:07:43,468 --> 00:07:45,218 Puzzles tonight. 308 00:07:45,343 --> 00:07:48,426 Of course we're opening 309 00:07:45,343 --> 00:07:48,426 Puzzles tonight! 310 00:07:48,551 --> 00:07:51,968 Aren't you going to ask us 311 00:07:48,551 --> 00:07:51,968 why it's called Puzzles? 312 00:07:52,093 --> 00:07:53,593 Nope. 313 00:07:53,718 --> 00:07:55,468 Okay. 314 00:07:55,593 --> 00:07:57,343 Okay, we're back 315 00:07:55,593 --> 00:07:57,343 live in 30 seconds. 316 00:07:57,426 --> 00:07:58,926 Where's Sandy? 317 00:07:59,051 --> 00:08:00,426 I don't know. 318 00:08:00,551 --> 00:08:03,343 Uh, let's see if he's 319 00:08:00,551 --> 00:08:03,343 still wearing his mic. 320 00:08:03,426 --> 00:08:05,718 Taxi, take me to Tina's house. 321 00:08:05,843 --> 00:08:07,468 50 West 67th. 322 00:08:07,593 --> 00:08:08,968 Sir, this is a falafel stand, 323 00:08:09,093 --> 00:08:10,343 and you're sitting 324 00:08:09,093 --> 00:08:10,343 in the hummus. 325 00:08:11,801 --> 00:08:13,343 Okay. 326 00:08:13,468 --> 00:08:15,551 Run the montage of people who 327 00:08:13,468 --> 00:08:15,551 died this year until I get back. 328 00:08:15,677 --> 00:08:16,843 And add Sandy, 329 00:08:16,968 --> 00:08:18,843 because when I find him, 330 00:08:16,968 --> 00:08:18,843 I'm going to kill him. 331 00:08:27,677 --> 00:08:29,093 Anyway, Dad... 332 00:08:27,677 --> 00:08:29,093 Stop hogging Dad already. 333 00:08:29,218 --> 00:08:31,343 I've got stuff 334 00:08:29,218 --> 00:08:31,343 to tell him, too. 335 00:08:29,218 --> 00:08:31,343 Like what? 336 00:08:31,468 --> 00:08:33,343 You're still living with Mom, 337 00:08:31,468 --> 00:08:33,343 and you have no job. 338 00:08:34,426 --> 00:08:35,551 Go ahead. 339 00:08:35,677 --> 00:08:37,551 So, anyway... 340 00:08:38,801 --> 00:08:41,343 July 8, 1972. 341 00:08:41,426 --> 00:08:42,635 Cheyenne, Wyoming. 342 00:08:42,759 --> 00:08:45,343 A hunter spots 343 00:08:42,759 --> 00:08:45,343 a hairy form in the forest. 344 00:08:45,426 --> 00:08:46,593 Bigfoot. 345 00:08:46,718 --> 00:08:47,843 His story 346 00:08:46,718 --> 00:08:47,843 is dismissed 347 00:08:47,968 --> 00:08:50,343 because, to be honest, 348 00:08:47,968 --> 00:08:50,343 he'd been drinking 349 00:08:50,426 --> 00:08:52,843 and had a history 350 00:08:50,426 --> 00:08:52,843 of mental problems. 351 00:08:52,968 --> 00:08:54,426 But was it a hoax? 352 00:08:54,551 --> 00:08:56,426 Or was it an enigma of the... 353 00:08:56,551 --> 00:08:58,968 It was an idiot 354 00:08:56,551 --> 00:08:58,968 in a gorilla suit. 355 00:08:59,093 --> 00:09:01,010 Enigma. 356 00:08:59,093 --> 00:09:01,010 Gorilla suit. 357 00:09:01,135 --> 00:09:04,093 Enigma! 358 00:09:01,135 --> 00:09:04,093 Gorilla suit! 359 00:09:04,218 --> 00:09:05,717 Marshall? Marcus? 360 00:09:05,843 --> 00:09:07,801 What are you guys doing here? 361 00:09:07,926 --> 00:09:09,801 Having a private 362 00:09:07,926 --> 00:09:09,801 moment with Dad. 363 00:09:09,926 --> 00:09:12,968 No, I'm having 364 00:09:09,926 --> 00:09:12,968 a private moment with Dad. 365 00:09:13,093 --> 00:09:16,218 No, I'm having 366 00:09:13,093 --> 00:09:16,218 a private moment with Dad. 367 00:09:16,343 --> 00:09:17,801 Touchdown, Vikings! 368 00:09:17,926 --> 00:09:19,551 Boom! Yeah! 369 00:09:25,843 --> 00:09:27,051 Anyway, Dad, 370 00:09:27,177 --> 00:09:29,968 since it's still 371 00:09:27,177 --> 00:09:29,968 just the two of us, 372 00:09:30,093 --> 00:09:32,551 I'll go on. 373 00:09:35,551 --> 00:09:39,343 I've always envisioned Puzzles 374 00:09:35,551 --> 00:09:39,343 as a literary salon, 375 00:09:39,468 --> 00:09:41,468 where Gotham's intelligentsia 376 00:09:39,468 --> 00:09:41,468 hold court 377 00:09:41,593 --> 00:09:43,801 on art, philosophy 378 00:09:41,593 --> 00:09:43,801 and literature. 379 00:09:43,926 --> 00:09:45,343 Great. 380 00:09:45,426 --> 00:09:48,343 And while you're distracting 381 00:09:45,426 --> 00:09:48,343 the nerds and fatties, 382 00:09:48,468 --> 00:09:50,593 I'll be in the VIP room 383 00:09:48,468 --> 00:09:50,593 getting it in. 384 00:09:50,717 --> 00:09:52,468 Uh, yeah, dude, 385 00:09:50,717 --> 00:09:52,468 I don't know 386 00:09:52,593 --> 00:09:55,177 where you got a velvet rope, 387 00:09:52,593 --> 00:09:55,177 but you can't 388 00:09:55,343 --> 00:09:57,343 use my room 389 00:09:55,343 --> 00:09:57,343 for anonymous sex. 390 00:09:57,426 --> 00:09:59,343 I'm kind of a neat freak 391 00:09:57,426 --> 00:09:59,343 that way. 392 00:09:59,426 --> 00:10:01,093 Hey, guys, I have an idea 393 00:09:59,426 --> 00:10:01,093 for Puzzles. 394 00:10:01,218 --> 00:10:03,426 What if... What? 395 00:10:03,551 --> 00:10:07,426 Puzzles is kind of 396 00:10:03,551 --> 00:10:07,426 our thing, so... 397 00:10:03,551 --> 00:10:07,426 Kind of a shared vision. 398 00:10:07,551 --> 00:10:09,426 Oh. Okay. I understand. 399 00:10:09,551 --> 00:10:10,968 But hey, we like 400 00:10:09,551 --> 00:10:10,968 your energy. 401 00:10:11,093 --> 00:10:13,343 How would you like 402 00:10:11,093 --> 00:10:13,343 to be our star bartender? 403 00:10:13,468 --> 00:10:14,801 I've always wanted 404 00:10:13,468 --> 00:10:14,801 to be a bartender. 405 00:10:14,926 --> 00:10:16,177 It's just like 406 00:10:14,926 --> 00:10:16,177 being a therapist. 407 00:10:16,301 --> 00:10:17,801 You listen to people's problems, 408 00:10:16,301 --> 00:10:17,801 pretend to care, 409 00:10:17,926 --> 00:10:19,301 but you can drink openly 410 00:10:19,426 --> 00:10:21,426 instead of having to hide 411 00:10:19,426 --> 00:10:21,426 your booze in a coffee mug. 412 00:10:21,551 --> 00:10:22,717 Great. Oh, 413 00:10:21,551 --> 00:10:22,717 and check it out. 414 00:10:22,843 --> 00:10:25,426 We worked out 415 00:10:22,843 --> 00:10:25,426 a theme song for Puzzles. 416 00:10:25,551 --> 00:10:26,926 While I was carrying 417 00:10:25,551 --> 00:10:26,926 100-pound kegs 418 00:10:27,051 --> 00:10:28,926 up four flights of stairs? 419 00:10:27,051 --> 00:10:28,926 Awesome. 420 00:10:43,551 --> 00:10:45,051 No, we're not. 421 00:10:43,551 --> 00:10:45,051 Bro! 422 00:10:56,926 --> 00:10:59,593 Not gonna happen. 423 00:10:56,926 --> 00:10:59,593 We'll talk about it. 424 00:11:08,343 --> 00:11:09,426 I'll go get 425 00:11:08,343 --> 00:11:09,426 the other kegs. 426 00:11:09,551 --> 00:11:10,551 Probably a good idea. 427 00:11:10,676 --> 00:11:11,801 We got to work out 428 00:11:10,676 --> 00:11:11,801 some harmonies. 429 00:11:15,801 --> 00:11:17,968 Excuse me, sir? 430 00:11:15,801 --> 00:11:17,968 About the TVs, 431 00:11:18,093 --> 00:11:19,676 we're in the middle 432 00:11:18,093 --> 00:11:19,676 of burying my aunt, so... 433 00:11:19,801 --> 00:11:21,468 Oh, I'm sorry. 434 00:11:19,801 --> 00:11:21,468 We'll keep it down. 435 00:11:21,592 --> 00:11:23,717 No, I just want 436 00:11:21,592 --> 00:11:23,717 to check out the score. 437 00:11:23,843 --> 00:11:26,218 Actually, I'm trying to have 438 00:11:26,343 --> 00:11:29,468 a private moment 439 00:11:26,343 --> 00:11:29,468 with my dad, so... 440 00:11:26,343 --> 00:11:29,468 Oh. 441 00:11:29,592 --> 00:11:31,801 It's just that I used 442 00:11:29,592 --> 00:11:31,801 to go to Vikes' games 443 00:11:31,926 --> 00:11:34,426 with my aunt; 444 00:11:31,926 --> 00:11:34,426 may she rest in peace. 445 00:11:40,093 --> 00:11:41,926 Anyway, so back 446 00:11:40,093 --> 00:11:41,926 to my story. 447 00:11:43,676 --> 00:11:46,177 She also loved burgers. 448 00:11:50,926 --> 00:11:53,592 So now, 449 00:11:50,926 --> 00:11:53,592 back to my story. 450 00:11:54,592 --> 00:11:56,426 Aunt Laura sure loved 451 00:11:54,592 --> 00:11:56,426 a toasted bun. 452 00:12:02,343 --> 00:12:04,177 Tina, please tell me 453 00:12:02,343 --> 00:12:04,177 Sandy's here. 454 00:12:04,343 --> 00:12:06,550 Don't worry, he's here. 455 00:12:06,676 --> 00:12:08,801 And we're back... 456 00:12:06,676 --> 00:12:08,801 together! 457 00:12:08,926 --> 00:12:11,093 He told me he loves me, 458 00:12:08,926 --> 00:12:11,093 he's sorry, 459 00:12:11,218 --> 00:12:13,218 and I'm the only girl for him. 460 00:12:14,468 --> 00:12:16,676 You know, since we're all here, 461 00:12:16,801 --> 00:12:18,926 and we're all horny... 462 00:12:20,801 --> 00:12:23,177 I don't know 463 00:12:20,801 --> 00:12:23,177 what went wrong. 464 00:12:23,343 --> 00:12:24,926 Well, proposing the 465 00:12:23,343 --> 00:12:24,926 three-way was bad, 466 00:12:25,051 --> 00:12:26,426 starting without us 467 00:12:25,051 --> 00:12:26,426 was worse, 468 00:12:26,550 --> 00:12:28,843 finishing in the hallway was 469 00:12:26,550 --> 00:12:28,843 the nail in the coffin. 470 00:12:28,968 --> 00:12:30,218 No! Stop drinking! 471 00:12:30,343 --> 00:12:32,468 I gotta get you 472 00:12:30,343 --> 00:12:32,468 back on air! 473 00:12:32,592 --> 00:12:34,093 But I'm single and 474 00:12:32,592 --> 00:12:34,093 ready to mingle! 475 00:12:34,218 --> 00:12:36,343 Hello, there. 476 00:12:36,468 --> 00:12:40,051 Oh, the Twitter-verse 477 00:12:36,468 --> 00:12:40,051 is blowing up about 478 00:12:40,177 --> 00:12:42,177 a new apartment-themed bar 479 00:12:40,177 --> 00:12:42,177 called Puzzles. 480 00:12:42,343 --> 00:12:43,426 Why is it called 481 00:12:42,343 --> 00:12:43,426 Puzzles? 482 00:12:43,550 --> 00:12:45,218 That's the puzzle! 483 00:12:45,343 --> 00:12:47,968 Anyway, this VIP room 484 00:12:45,343 --> 00:12:47,968 has a maximum occupancy 485 00:12:48,093 --> 00:12:50,843 of two people including me, 486 00:12:48,093 --> 00:12:50,843 so eeny... 487 00:12:50,968 --> 00:12:53,676 and the rest 488 00:12:50,968 --> 00:12:53,676 of you may go. 489 00:12:54,801 --> 00:12:57,801 It's funny, 490 00:12:54,801 --> 00:12:57,801 but it seems each time 491 00:12:57,926 --> 00:13:00,926 I read James Joyce's Ulysses, 492 00:13:01,051 --> 00:13:03,343 it's a different book, 493 00:13:03,426 --> 00:13:06,426 begging the question: 494 00:13:03,426 --> 00:13:06,426 Has the book changed... 495 00:13:06,550 --> 00:13:08,843 or have I? 496 00:13:12,177 --> 00:13:14,676 Okay, people are getting rowdy 497 00:13:12,177 --> 00:13:14,676 and drunk and breaking things. 498 00:13:14,801 --> 00:13:16,926 I know this goes against 499 00:13:14,801 --> 00:13:16,926 the Puzzles mission statement 500 00:13:17,051 --> 00:13:19,426 you made me memorize, but we 501 00:13:17,051 --> 00:13:19,426 gotta raise our drink prices. 502 00:13:19,550 --> 00:13:22,051 All right, just a little bit 503 00:13:19,550 --> 00:13:22,051 so no one will notice. 504 00:13:26,550 --> 00:13:28,051 Boo! 505 00:13:29,343 --> 00:13:30,968 Poodles sucks! 506 00:13:31,093 --> 00:13:33,426 And that's when the night 507 00:13:31,093 --> 00:13:33,426 turned to absolute crap. 508 00:13:59,550 --> 00:14:01,968 What-what do, what do, 509 00:13:59,550 --> 00:14:01,968 what do we do? 510 00:14:02,093 --> 00:14:04,051 And so Puzzles got a bouncer, 511 00:14:04,177 --> 00:14:06,177 All right, you know what, 512 00:14:04,177 --> 00:14:06,177 you guys? 513 00:14:11,592 --> 00:14:13,676 No. No, no, no, no, no, 514 00:14:11,592 --> 00:14:13,676 you said double 515 00:14:13,801 --> 00:14:15,177 what MacLaren's 516 00:14:13,801 --> 00:14:15,177 was paying me. 517 00:14:15,343 --> 00:14:17,343 And why isn't anyone wearing 518 00:14:15,343 --> 00:14:17,343 the hats I brought up? 519 00:14:20,343 --> 00:14:22,343 "November 14th... 520 00:14:22,425 --> 00:14:23,343 "1982. 521 00:14:23,467 --> 00:14:26,717 "Everglades National Park, 522 00:14:23,467 --> 00:14:26,717 Florida. 523 00:14:26,843 --> 00:14:29,592 "Five mysterious lights dance 524 00:14:26,843 --> 00:14:29,592 in the night sky. 525 00:14:29,717 --> 00:14:32,343 "A ray shoots down, 526 00:14:29,717 --> 00:14:32,343 lifting the park ranger, 527 00:14:32,425 --> 00:14:35,801 "who, to be fair, was going 528 00:14:32,425 --> 00:14:35,801 through a bad divorce 529 00:14:35,926 --> 00:14:39,968 and had a habit of lying 530 00:14:35,926 --> 00:14:39,968 to get attention." 531 00:14:40,093 --> 00:14:41,968 I hate this job, Sandy! 532 00:14:42,093 --> 00:14:44,177 I went into journalism 533 00:14:42,093 --> 00:14:44,177 to make a difference, 534 00:14:44,343 --> 00:14:46,676 but you have made 535 00:14:44,343 --> 00:14:46,676 that impossible. 536 00:14:46,801 --> 00:14:48,676 You know, to be honest, 537 00:14:46,801 --> 00:14:48,676 it hasn't been 538 00:14:48,801 --> 00:14:50,592 an easy couple months for me. 539 00:14:48,801 --> 00:14:50,592 I've made mistakes. 540 00:14:50,717 --> 00:14:52,968 I've felt alone. 541 00:14:50,717 --> 00:14:52,968 I had to let go of dreams 542 00:14:53,093 --> 00:14:54,592 I didn't even know I had. 543 00:14:54,717 --> 00:14:56,843 So here's the deal: 544 00:14:56,968 --> 00:14:58,218 You're gonna get 545 00:14:56,968 --> 00:14:58,218 back on air 546 00:14:58,343 --> 00:14:59,926 and count us 547 00:14:58,343 --> 00:14:59,926 into a better year, 548 00:15:00,051 --> 00:15:04,425 because I just can't do 549 00:15:00,051 --> 00:15:04,425 2011 anymore. You with me? 550 00:15:04,550 --> 00:15:06,801 He's not with me, is he? 551 00:15:14,343 --> 00:15:16,343 Anyway, Dad, where was I? 552 00:15:17,467 --> 00:15:18,592 You know what? 553 00:15:17,467 --> 00:15:18,592 Fine, get out of here! 554 00:15:18,717 --> 00:15:20,801 We don't need ya! 555 00:15:22,801 --> 00:15:25,676 And why doesn't anybody 556 00:15:22,801 --> 00:15:25,676 like these hats? 557 00:15:25,801 --> 00:15:29,550 I made these hats. 558 00:15:29,676 --> 00:15:31,342 It's because 559 00:15:29,676 --> 00:15:31,342 they're wet, Doug. 560 00:15:31,467 --> 00:15:34,051 Why are they all wet? 561 00:15:34,177 --> 00:15:36,177 Were those our last customers? 562 00:15:36,342 --> 00:15:38,051 Let me go check 563 00:15:36,342 --> 00:15:38,051 the bathroom. 564 00:15:42,717 --> 00:15:44,801 You must be 565 00:15:42,717 --> 00:15:44,801 from the escort service. 566 00:15:46,425 --> 00:15:52,051 The scenario is high school 567 00:15:46,425 --> 00:15:52,051 wrestling match. 568 00:15:55,676 --> 00:15:56,592 Hello? 569 00:15:56,717 --> 00:15:59,051 So get this: 570 00:15:56,717 --> 00:15:59,051 I lost Sandy Rivers. 571 00:15:59,177 --> 00:16:01,051 Funny you should mention that. 572 00:16:01,177 --> 00:16:02,342 It's almost midnight! 573 00:16:02,467 --> 00:16:04,177 What am I gonna do, 574 00:16:02,467 --> 00:16:04,177 go on the air myself? 575 00:16:04,342 --> 00:16:07,342 Listen... Wait. Yeah, do that! 576 00:16:07,425 --> 00:16:09,051 No, I-I can't actually. 577 00:16:09,177 --> 00:16:11,801 Yes, you can. It's what you 578 00:16:09,177 --> 00:16:11,801 really want and you deserve it. 579 00:16:11,926 --> 00:16:13,843 Kevin, that's not how it works. 580 00:16:13,968 --> 00:16:15,177 Sounds like that's 581 00:16:13,968 --> 00:16:15,177 your only choice. 582 00:16:15,342 --> 00:16:17,425 New York's a big city. 583 00:16:17,550 --> 00:16:19,425 Sandy Rivers 584 00:16:17,550 --> 00:16:19,425 could be anywhere. 585 00:16:20,926 --> 00:16:23,592 And... wrestle! 586 00:16:25,342 --> 00:16:26,801 Hey. 587 00:16:26,926 --> 00:16:29,717 I'm sorry, baby. 588 00:16:29,843 --> 00:16:31,425 I just... 589 00:16:29,843 --> 00:16:31,425 I want our kid 590 00:16:31,550 --> 00:16:33,801 to believe that the 591 00:16:31,550 --> 00:16:33,801 universe is magical. 592 00:16:33,926 --> 00:16:35,717 You know, like 593 00:16:33,926 --> 00:16:35,717 my dad taught me. 594 00:16:35,843 --> 00:16:37,550 You know what 595 00:16:35,843 --> 00:16:37,550 my dad taught me? 596 00:16:37,676 --> 00:16:39,843 Nothing... 597 00:16:37,676 --> 00:16:39,843 'cause he was never there. 598 00:16:42,218 --> 00:16:46,093 "June 22nd, 1996, 599 00:16:42,218 --> 00:16:46,093 Brooklyn, New York. 600 00:16:46,218 --> 00:16:50,051 "A man misses his daughter's 601 00:16:46,218 --> 00:16:50,051 high school graduation. 602 00:16:50,177 --> 00:16:52,342 "Later, she discovers 603 00:16:50,177 --> 00:16:52,342 her babysitting money 604 00:16:52,425 --> 00:16:54,342 "has been spent on 605 00:16:52,425 --> 00:16:54,342 a board game called 606 00:16:54,425 --> 00:16:57,342 Who Stole The 607 00:16:54,425 --> 00:16:57,342 Babysitting Money?" 608 00:16:57,425 --> 00:16:59,342 He never saw 609 00:16:57,425 --> 00:16:59,342 the irony in that. 610 00:16:59,425 --> 00:17:02,843 "December 31st, 2011. 611 00:17:02,968 --> 00:17:06,801 "A woman calls her father 612 00:17:02,968 --> 00:17:06,801 to tell him she's pregnant. 613 00:17:06,926 --> 00:17:09,968 He says, 'Great. Thanks,' 614 00:17:06,926 --> 00:17:09,968 and hangs up on her." 615 00:17:10,093 --> 00:17:13,425 And after pushing 616 00:17:10,093 --> 00:17:13,425 her to call him, 617 00:17:13,550 --> 00:17:17,843 a Big Foot is discovered 618 00:17:13,550 --> 00:17:17,843 in her husband's mouth. 619 00:17:19,051 --> 00:17:21,177 I'm glad you're 620 00:17:19,051 --> 00:17:21,177 a believer, baby, 621 00:17:21,342 --> 00:17:25,968 but I'm never gonna believe 622 00:17:21,342 --> 00:17:25,968 in an "enigma of the mystical" 623 00:17:26,093 --> 00:17:29,093 unless I see it 624 00:17:26,093 --> 00:17:29,093 with my own eyes. 625 00:17:29,217 --> 00:17:31,051 Because the truth is, 626 00:17:31,177 --> 00:17:35,592 my father never taught me 627 00:17:31,177 --> 00:17:35,592 believe in anything but myself. 628 00:17:35,717 --> 00:17:39,342 Well, if it helps at all, 629 00:17:35,717 --> 00:17:39,342 I believe in you, too. 630 00:17:41,342 --> 00:17:44,342 Then there's a pretty 631 00:17:41,342 --> 00:17:44,342 good chance I don't exist. 632 00:17:44,467 --> 00:17:45,467 How dare you? 633 00:17:49,467 --> 00:17:51,717 Oh, my God! 634 00:17:51,843 --> 00:17:54,467 This is Robin Scherbatsky 635 00:17:51,843 --> 00:17:54,467 filling in for Sandy Rivers. 636 00:17:54,592 --> 00:17:56,342 You know, America, 637 00:17:56,467 --> 00:17:59,342 tonight I've been groped, 638 00:17:56,467 --> 00:17:59,342 stepped in puke 639 00:17:59,425 --> 00:18:00,884 and until ten minutes ago, 640 00:18:01,010 --> 00:18:04,717 had no idea I would be 641 00:18:01,010 --> 00:18:04,717 on national television. 642 00:18:04,843 --> 00:18:05,968 That's my girl. 643 00:18:06,093 --> 00:18:08,176 But that's the magic 644 00:18:06,093 --> 00:18:08,176 of New Year's. 645 00:18:08,342 --> 00:18:10,342 When that clock 646 00:18:08,342 --> 00:18:10,342 strikes midnight, 647 00:18:10,425 --> 00:18:11,843 we all get a fresh start. 648 00:18:11,968 --> 00:18:15,926 And I don't know about you, 649 00:18:11,968 --> 00:18:15,926 but I could really use one. 650 00:18:16,051 --> 00:18:19,717 And that magic moment 651 00:18:16,051 --> 00:18:19,717 starts in ten... 652 00:18:19,843 --> 00:18:21,592 nine... 653 00:18:21,717 --> 00:18:24,717 That night became a turning 654 00:18:21,717 --> 00:18:24,717 point in Robin's career. 655 00:18:27,926 --> 00:18:29,592 But we'll get to that. 656 00:18:30,801 --> 00:18:32,342 They're nice hats, Doug. 657 00:18:32,425 --> 00:18:35,342 They're wet... 658 00:18:32,425 --> 00:18:35,342 but they're nice. 659 00:18:35,425 --> 00:18:38,342 three, two, one. 660 00:18:42,550 --> 00:18:44,342 And that's the story 661 00:18:42,550 --> 00:18:44,342 of New Year's Eve. 662 00:18:44,467 --> 00:18:46,342 You know, I've been thinking 663 00:18:46,425 --> 00:18:49,051 that the reason I got so intense 664 00:18:46,425 --> 00:18:49,051 with Lily 665 00:18:49,176 --> 00:18:52,425 about Enigmas of the Mystical 666 00:18:49,176 --> 00:18:52,425 is that, well... 667 00:18:52,550 --> 00:18:54,467 Could you pass the pickles? 668 00:18:56,425 --> 00:18:59,217 with you gone, I feel 669 00:18:56,425 --> 00:18:59,217 the mystical a little less. 670 00:18:59,342 --> 00:19:01,425 Can you hand me the chips? 671 00:19:01,550 --> 00:19:04,217 Sometimes 672 00:19:01,550 --> 00:19:04,217 I feel you a little less. 673 00:19:04,342 --> 00:19:07,968 That's why today was 674 00:19:04,342 --> 00:19:07,968 so important because I just... 675 00:19:08,093 --> 00:19:09,093 I needed to... 676 00:19:12,176 --> 00:19:16,093 Did you just open a beer 677 00:19:12,176 --> 00:19:16,093 on my father's headstone? 678 00:19:16,217 --> 00:19:17,926 Actually, it's a hard cider. 679 00:19:18,051 --> 00:19:20,926 And just as he was about 680 00:19:18,051 --> 00:19:20,926 to lose it... 681 00:19:21,051 --> 00:19:22,717 Hey, Marvin, can you 682 00:19:21,051 --> 00:19:22,717 pass me a burger? 683 00:19:22,843 --> 00:19:24,176 Hey, not Marvin. Marshall. 684 00:19:24,342 --> 00:19:26,676 Sorry, it's just, 685 00:19:24,342 --> 00:19:26,676 you're so much like your pop. 686 00:19:26,801 --> 00:19:29,217 Your Uncle Marshall 687 00:19:26,801 --> 00:19:29,217 thought back 688 00:19:29,342 --> 00:19:31,051 to all those tailgates 689 00:19:29,342 --> 00:19:31,051 with his father. 690 00:19:32,926 --> 00:19:34,801 Hey, mind if I grab one? 691 00:19:34,926 --> 00:19:37,342 The more the merrier! 692 00:19:34,926 --> 00:19:37,342 All right. 693 00:19:44,801 --> 00:19:52,176 it's coming soon... 694 00:19:52,342 --> 00:19:55,342 And he realized that maybe 695 00:19:52,342 --> 00:19:55,342 private moments are overrated. 696 00:19:55,467 --> 00:19:56,550 You know what? 697 00:19:58,425 --> 00:19:59,550 The more the merrier. 698 00:20:00,801 --> 00:20:02,425 Hey, guys. 699 00:20:09,300 --> 00:20:10,176 Happy New Year. 700 00:20:10,300 --> 00:20:11,801 Happy New Year. 701 00:20:14,801 --> 00:20:18,050 January 1st, 2012, 702 00:20:14,801 --> 00:20:18,050 East Meadow, New York. 703 00:20:18,176 --> 00:20:21,717 A woman answers her door to 704 00:20:18,176 --> 00:20:21,717 find something more enigmatic 705 00:20:21,843 --> 00:20:24,217 and mysterious than Bigfoot 706 00:20:21,843 --> 00:20:24,217 or the Loch Ness Monster. 707 00:20:24,342 --> 00:20:25,676 Dad? 708 00:20:25,801 --> 00:20:27,342 Hey. 709 00:20:27,467 --> 00:20:29,050 I thought you were in Chicago. 710 00:20:29,176 --> 00:20:30,926 I was. 711 00:20:31,050 --> 00:20:34,050 Great. Thanks. 712 00:20:34,176 --> 00:20:36,926 My daughter's having a baby! 713 00:20:41,425 --> 00:20:43,843 Did you drive all night? 714 00:20:43,968 --> 00:20:45,050 Yeah. 715 00:20:45,176 --> 00:20:48,425 Well, Teddy and I 716 00:20:45,176 --> 00:20:48,425 split the drive. 717 00:20:48,550 --> 00:20:51,176 This guy's a maniac 718 00:20:48,550 --> 00:20:51,176 behind the wheel. 719 00:20:52,676 --> 00:20:54,300 Congrats, Princess. 720 00:20:59,176 --> 00:21:00,550 Happy New Year, Dad.