1 00:00:02,410 --> 00:00:03,493 Kids, I'll never forget 2 00:00:02,410 --> 00:00:03,493 the first time 3 00:00:03,618 --> 00:00:05,162 I told your mother I loved her. 4 00:00:05,287 --> 00:00:07,248 It was a rainy day in New York. 5 00:00:07,373 --> 00:00:08,707 We just had a horrible lunch. 6 00:00:08,832 --> 00:00:10,584 The movie we wanted to see 7 00:00:08,832 --> 00:00:10,584 was sold out, 8 00:00:10,709 --> 00:00:11,668 and I just looked at her 9 00:00:11,793 --> 00:00:14,546 and said, "I love you." 10 00:00:14,671 --> 00:00:16,048 It was a big deal for me. 11 00:00:16,173 --> 00:00:18,550 I hadn't said that 12 00:00:16,173 --> 00:00:18,550 to a girl since... 13 00:00:18,675 --> 00:00:20,302 I love you, Robin. 14 00:00:20,428 --> 00:00:22,846 I'm serious. 15 00:00:24,181 --> 00:00:26,892 Do you remember why we 16 00:00:24,181 --> 00:00:26,892 broke up in the first place? 17 00:00:27,017 --> 00:00:28,227 We asked each other, 18 00:00:27,017 --> 00:00:28,227 "Where do you want 19 00:00:28,352 --> 00:00:29,437 to be in five years?" 20 00:00:29,561 --> 00:00:32,522 And our answers 21 00:00:29,561 --> 00:00:32,522 were just too different. 22 00:00:32,647 --> 00:00:33,815 Well, it's 23 00:00:32,647 --> 00:00:33,815 five years later, 24 00:00:33,941 --> 00:00:37,069 and where are we? 25 00:00:37,194 --> 00:00:39,071 Standing on the roof 26 00:00:39,196 --> 00:00:41,656 where I kissed you 27 00:00:39,196 --> 00:00:41,656 for the first time. 28 00:00:43,158 --> 00:00:45,827 I know this is 29 00:00:43,158 --> 00:00:45,827 a lot to process, 30 00:00:45,953 --> 00:00:47,996 so no pressure here. 31 00:00:48,122 --> 00:00:51,541 Just... what do you think? 32 00:00:52,751 --> 00:00:54,086 You know what? 33 00:00:52,751 --> 00:00:54,086 You're exhausted, it's late. 34 00:00:54,211 --> 00:00:55,045 Let's just go to sleep. 35 00:00:55,170 --> 00:00:56,171 Well, good night. 36 00:01:00,217 --> 00:01:01,635 What the hell was that? 37 00:01:01,676 --> 00:01:03,262 Okay, I can fix this. 38 00:01:03,387 --> 00:01:07,391 I-I was just temporarily insane 39 00:01:03,387 --> 00:01:07,391 because of my Lyme disease, 40 00:01:07,516 --> 00:01:12,354 which I got on a camping trip 41 00:01:07,516 --> 00:01:12,354 that I didn't tell her about 42 00:01:12,480 --> 00:01:17,359 because... I go camping 43 00:01:12,480 --> 00:01:17,359 in secret. 44 00:01:17,485 --> 00:01:19,278 Perfect. 45 00:01:19,403 --> 00:01:21,363 Or I could say, "I'm sorry, 46 00:01:19,403 --> 00:01:21,363 we're great as friends. 47 00:01:21,489 --> 00:01:22,906 Let's just forget 48 00:01:21,489 --> 00:01:22,906 I ever said anything." 49 00:01:23,031 --> 00:01:23,907 Yeah, that's probably better. 50 00:01:24,032 --> 00:01:25,909 Okay, here goes. 51 00:01:28,870 --> 00:01:31,748 I go camping in secret. 52 00:01:50,725 --> 00:01:53,312 Wow, Ted, I... 53 00:01:50,725 --> 00:01:53,312 wow, okay. 54 00:01:53,437 --> 00:01:55,314 You got to give 55 00:01:53,437 --> 00:01:55,314 me a minute here. 56 00:01:55,439 --> 00:01:57,232 Yeah, of course. 57 00:01:57,358 --> 00:02:00,235 Okay, um, we need to 58 00:01:57,358 --> 00:02:00,235 t-talk about this. 59 00:02:00,361 --> 00:02:03,697 This time yesterday, 60 00:02:00,361 --> 00:02:03,697 I was in Vermont 61 00:02:03,738 --> 00:02:05,157 engaged to another man. 62 00:02:05,282 --> 00:02:09,119 I mean, it's been 24 hours 63 00:02:05,282 --> 00:02:09,119 of emotional mayhem, 64 00:02:09,244 --> 00:02:11,205 and, and the day 65 00:02:09,244 --> 00:02:11,205 is still not over. 66 00:02:11,330 --> 00:02:12,706 I mean, I swear 67 00:02:11,330 --> 00:02:12,706 to God, 68 00:02:12,831 --> 00:02:14,375 if there's any more surprises, 69 00:02:12,831 --> 00:02:14,375 I'm gonna hit someone! 70 00:02:15,501 --> 00:02:17,961 comrade. 71 00:02:18,962 --> 00:02:20,214 That means, 72 00:02:20,339 --> 00:02:22,132 "Hello, coworker." 73 00:02:22,257 --> 00:02:24,218 You ready for our trip 74 00:02:22,257 --> 00:02:24,218 to Mother Russia? 75 00:02:24,343 --> 00:02:27,095 Oh, yeah, Aunt Robin 76 00:02:24,343 --> 00:02:27,095 was thrilled World Wide News 77 00:02:27,221 --> 00:02:29,056 asked her to go to Moscow 78 00:02:27,221 --> 00:02:29,056 to cover Maslenitsa. 79 00:02:29,181 --> 00:02:30,558 She was less thrilled 80 00:02:29,181 --> 00:02:30,558 to discover 81 00:02:30,724 --> 00:02:33,435 Maslenitsa is the city's 82 00:02:30,724 --> 00:02:33,435 annual butter festival. 83 00:02:33,561 --> 00:02:35,937 Even worse, she'd spend 84 00:02:33,561 --> 00:02:35,937 an entire week with all those 85 00:02:36,063 --> 00:02:39,567 buttery Russians 86 00:02:36,063 --> 00:02:39,567 and her archenemy Patrice. 87 00:02:39,733 --> 00:02:43,945 Uh, our flight leaves 88 00:02:39,733 --> 00:02:43,945 at 9:00 p.m., not a.m. 89 00:02:44,071 --> 00:02:46,740 God... Patrice! 90 00:02:46,823 --> 00:02:48,742 But, Robin, 91 00:02:46,823 --> 00:02:48,742 the schedule says 9:00 a.m. 92 00:02:48,867 --> 00:02:50,536 and my ticket says 9:00 a.m. 93 00:02:50,744 --> 00:02:52,746 and all the e-mail reminders 94 00:02:50,744 --> 00:02:52,746 said 9:00 a.m. 95 00:02:52,787 --> 00:02:54,456 and our boss in the car 96 00:02:52,787 --> 00:02:54,456 downstairs said... 97 00:02:54,582 --> 00:02:55,749 Okay, Patrice, I get it! 98 00:02:55,874 --> 00:02:57,042 Oh, no! 99 00:02:57,167 --> 00:02:58,627 Pair of pants 100 00:02:57,167 --> 00:02:58,627 coming in hot! 101 00:02:58,752 --> 00:02:59,794 Noise-canceling 102 00:02:58,752 --> 00:02:59,794 headphones. 103 00:02:59,920 --> 00:03:01,463 Oh, I don't need 'em. 104 00:03:01,589 --> 00:03:03,298 It's a ten-hour flight and 105 00:03:01,589 --> 00:03:03,298 your sitting next to Patrice. 106 00:03:03,424 --> 00:03:05,759 Oh, God, 107 00:03:03,424 --> 00:03:05,759 where's my cough syrup? 108 00:03:05,842 --> 00:03:06,885 You're gonna make it. 109 00:03:07,010 --> 00:03:08,095 I'll bring 110 00:03:07,010 --> 00:03:08,095 your bag down. 111 00:03:08,220 --> 00:03:09,763 Where are my shoes? 112 00:03:08,220 --> 00:03:09,763 Where are my shoes? 113 00:03:09,888 --> 00:03:11,473 Don't worry. It's fine. 114 00:03:11,599 --> 00:03:12,600 And look, about 115 00:03:11,599 --> 00:03:12,600 all this... 116 00:03:11,599 --> 00:03:12,600 Just go. 117 00:03:12,766 --> 00:03:13,850 Good-bye. 118 00:03:12,766 --> 00:03:13,850 Bye. 119 00:03:16,895 --> 00:03:18,813 Why didn't I kiss her? 120 00:03:21,609 --> 00:03:23,652 We'll continue this 121 00:03:21,609 --> 00:03:23,652 when I get back. 122 00:03:33,412 --> 00:03:34,455 Hello. 123 00:03:34,580 --> 00:03:35,872 I know it's early, 124 00:03:35,997 --> 00:03:37,625 but can you meet me 125 00:03:35,997 --> 00:03:37,625 at the bar right now, alone? 126 00:03:37,791 --> 00:03:39,084 I'm on my way. 127 00:03:39,209 --> 00:03:40,628 I got to meet Ted 128 00:03:39,209 --> 00:03:40,628 at the bar. 129 00:03:40,794 --> 00:03:42,254 It's 7:00 a.m. 130 00:03:42,379 --> 00:03:46,216 Man, Ted really needs to work 131 00:03:42,379 --> 00:03:46,216 on his boundaries. 132 00:03:46,341 --> 00:03:48,302 Shh, guys, seriously. 133 00:03:50,053 --> 00:03:51,639 Why are you in our bed? 134 00:03:51,805 --> 00:03:54,849 I took the drunk train 135 00:03:51,805 --> 00:03:54,849 and got stuck out here. 136 00:03:54,975 --> 00:03:57,352 Oh, God, I am so hungover. 137 00:03:57,478 --> 00:04:00,105 Oh, God, 138 00:03:57,478 --> 00:04:00,105 Lily's not wearing a bra! 139 00:04:00,230 --> 00:04:01,523 Shh! 140 00:04:01,649 --> 00:04:03,525 Bye, baby. 141 00:04:05,402 --> 00:04:06,987 Do you think...? 142 00:04:07,112 --> 00:04:08,822 Okay, I already know 143 00:04:07,112 --> 00:04:08,822 I don't want to hear this. 144 00:04:08,905 --> 00:04:10,616 Do you think 145 00:04:08,905 --> 00:04:10,616 that if we did it... 146 00:04:10,824 --> 00:04:12,367 Yeah, I was right. 147 00:04:10,824 --> 00:04:12,367 I don't want to hear this. 148 00:04:12,493 --> 00:04:14,369 and I did 149 00:04:12,493 --> 00:04:14,369 a really good job... 150 00:04:14,495 --> 00:04:15,663 Please leave. 151 00:04:15,829 --> 00:04:19,500 that I could turn that 152 00:04:15,829 --> 00:04:19,500 into my baby? 153 00:04:19,625 --> 00:04:21,876 I think I'm gonna throw up. 154 00:04:22,002 --> 00:04:24,505 Morning sickness? 155 00:04:22,002 --> 00:04:24,505 No. 156 00:04:26,840 --> 00:04:28,133 It's crazy, right? 157 00:04:28,258 --> 00:04:29,510 Are you shocked? 158 00:04:29,635 --> 00:04:31,512 No, I'm not shocked. 159 00:04:29,635 --> 00:04:31,512 You're in love with Robin. 160 00:04:31,637 --> 00:04:33,096 Do you remember back 161 00:04:33,221 --> 00:04:35,140 at Christmas when she was upset, 162 00:04:33,221 --> 00:04:35,140 you didn't even know why, 163 00:04:35,265 --> 00:04:37,601 and you spent eight hours 164 00:04:35,265 --> 00:04:37,601 setting up Christmas lights 165 00:04:37,726 --> 00:04:39,394 in the apartment 166 00:04:37,726 --> 00:04:39,394 just to cheer her up. 167 00:04:39,520 --> 00:04:41,647 That was 168 00:04:39,520 --> 00:04:41,647 a platonic friend thing. 169 00:04:39,520 --> 00:04:41,647 A platonic friend thing? 170 00:04:41,855 --> 00:04:44,232 Yeah. 171 00:04:41,855 --> 00:04:44,232 Really? Ted, 172 00:04:41,855 --> 00:04:44,232 let me ask you a question. 173 00:04:44,358 --> 00:04:45,984 Would you have done that for me? 174 00:04:46,109 --> 00:04:48,862 You probably would have. 175 00:04:46,109 --> 00:04:48,862 You're such a good friend, Ted. 176 00:04:48,903 --> 00:04:50,864 You, too, buddy. 177 00:04:50,947 --> 00:04:51,990 I'm going into the city. 178 00:04:53,283 --> 00:04:54,951 Just, while I'm gone, 179 00:04:55,076 --> 00:04:56,370 don't go snooping around 180 00:04:55,076 --> 00:04:56,370 in our stuff. 181 00:04:56,495 --> 00:04:59,373 I know you think we have 182 00:04:56,495 --> 00:04:59,373 a sex tape hidden somewhere, 183 00:04:59,498 --> 00:05:02,917 so I'll save you the trouble. 184 00:04:59,498 --> 00:05:02,917 We don't. Good-bye. 185 00:05:03,043 --> 00:05:06,547 Here's that moment 186 00:05:03,043 --> 00:05:06,547 from Barney's perspective. 187 00:05:08,590 --> 00:05:10,634 We have a sex tape hidden 188 00:05:08,590 --> 00:05:10,634 somewhere. 189 00:05:14,638 --> 00:05:18,016 Challenge accepted. 190 00:05:18,141 --> 00:05:20,227 Robin again? 191 00:05:20,352 --> 00:05:22,521 Why does everyone 192 00:05:20,352 --> 00:05:22,521 keep going after Robin? 193 00:05:22,646 --> 00:05:25,065 How come no one 194 00:05:22,646 --> 00:05:25,065 ever takes a run at me? 195 00:05:25,190 --> 00:05:26,441 Barney hits on you every day. 196 00:05:26,567 --> 00:05:28,360 Yeah, but he just wants 197 00:05:26,567 --> 00:05:28,360 to bang me. 198 00:05:28,485 --> 00:05:29,611 I want something real. 199 00:05:29,737 --> 00:05:31,655 I know, babe. 200 00:05:31,780 --> 00:05:33,574 Double A Cleaning. 201 00:05:33,699 --> 00:05:34,908 Consuela, it's Barney. 202 00:05:34,949 --> 00:05:36,993 I need you and the girls 203 00:05:34,949 --> 00:05:36,993 for the afternoon. 204 00:05:37,118 --> 00:05:38,579 Of course, right away, 205 00:05:37,118 --> 00:05:38,579 Mr. Barney. 206 00:05:38,704 --> 00:05:39,747 Are you at home now? 207 00:05:39,913 --> 00:05:41,331 No, I'm at a house 208 00:05:39,913 --> 00:05:41,331 on Long Island. 209 00:05:41,456 --> 00:05:42,708 I'll text you the details. 210 00:05:42,916 --> 00:05:45,085 It's a big job. 211 00:05:42,916 --> 00:05:45,085 The place has been ransacked. 212 00:05:45,210 --> 00:05:46,961 We'll get right on it. 213 00:05:47,087 --> 00:05:48,380 Thanks, Consuela, 214 00:05:47,087 --> 00:05:48,380 you're the best. 215 00:05:52,926 --> 00:05:54,553 Ted, I know 216 00:05:52,926 --> 00:05:54,553 you're ready to go 217 00:05:54,678 --> 00:05:56,388 with this whole 218 00:05:54,678 --> 00:05:56,388 you-and-Robin thing, 219 00:05:56,513 --> 00:05:57,765 but is she ready 220 00:05:56,513 --> 00:05:57,765 to go? 221 00:05:57,931 --> 00:06:00,934 Is she ready to go? Um... 222 00:06:04,563 --> 00:06:07,232 Mmm, we'll continue this... 223 00:06:07,357 --> 00:06:09,276 when I get back. 224 00:06:11,403 --> 00:06:13,739 So... 225 00:06:13,947 --> 00:06:15,532 Are you sure 226 00:06:13,947 --> 00:06:15,532 that it wasn't...? 227 00:06:19,119 --> 00:06:21,789 We'll continue this 228 00:06:19,119 --> 00:06:21,789 when I get back. 229 00:06:21,955 --> 00:06:23,331 Okay. 230 00:06:26,585 --> 00:06:28,420 What? No! 231 00:06:28,545 --> 00:06:31,131 Damn it, Lily, 232 00:06:28,545 --> 00:06:31,131 why are you rooting against me? 233 00:06:31,256 --> 00:06:32,466 I'm not rooting 234 00:06:31,256 --> 00:06:32,466 against you. 235 00:06:32,591 --> 00:06:33,174 Yes, you are. 236 00:06:33,300 --> 00:06:34,342 No, I'm not. 237 00:06:34,468 --> 00:06:35,594 Yes, she was. 238 00:06:35,719 --> 00:06:37,596 You see, at that very moment... 239 00:06:42,976 --> 00:06:45,687 "Long-term bets"? 240 00:06:55,280 --> 00:06:56,531 Hmm. 241 00:07:10,838 --> 00:07:15,008 My God! They're placing bets 242 00:07:10,838 --> 00:07:15,008 on our lives. 243 00:07:15,133 --> 00:07:18,219 And I'm sorry, 244 00:07:15,133 --> 00:07:18,219 Ted cannot pull off bald. 245 00:07:18,345 --> 00:07:20,013 You know Ted. 246 00:07:18,345 --> 00:07:20,013 I'm right about this. 247 00:07:23,183 --> 00:07:26,478 Ted, I'm your best friend. 248 00:07:23,183 --> 00:07:26,478 Why would I root against you? 249 00:07:26,603 --> 00:07:30,732 Lily bets Marshall that Ted 250 00:07:26,603 --> 00:07:30,732 and Robin won't end up together. 251 00:07:30,858 --> 00:07:32,651 That's why. 252 00:07:37,197 --> 00:07:38,406 So, Lily was betting against 253 00:07:37,197 --> 00:07:38,406 me and Robin. 254 00:07:38,532 --> 00:07:39,616 I just didn't know it. 255 00:07:39,741 --> 00:07:41,702 Okay, you want to make 256 00:07:39,741 --> 00:07:41,702 it work with Robin? 257 00:07:41,827 --> 00:07:43,829 You need to stay 258 00:07:41,827 --> 00:07:43,829 on her radar. 259 00:07:44,037 --> 00:07:45,873 Call her right now. 260 00:07:46,039 --> 00:07:47,290 She's on the plane. 261 00:07:46,039 --> 00:07:47,290 Her phone's off. 262 00:07:47,415 --> 00:07:49,042 Oh, my God! 263 00:07:49,167 --> 00:07:51,920 How adorable would it be 264 00:07:49,167 --> 00:07:51,920 if when the plane lands, 265 00:07:52,045 --> 00:07:53,213 she turns on her phone 266 00:07:53,338 --> 00:07:56,049 and her mailbox is full 267 00:07:53,338 --> 00:07:56,049 of messages from you? 268 00:07:57,592 --> 00:08:00,721 Ted, don't leave 269 00:07:57,592 --> 00:08:00,721 her any voice mails. 270 00:07:57,592 --> 00:08:00,721 Why not? 271 00:08:00,846 --> 00:08:03,139 Because... 272 00:08:00,846 --> 00:08:03,139 Because you need 273 00:08:00,846 --> 00:08:03,139 to go to Russia. 274 00:08:03,264 --> 00:08:04,516 With love! 275 00:08:04,641 --> 00:08:05,767 Surprise her. 276 00:08:05,893 --> 00:08:07,769 Make the... 277 00:08:05,893 --> 00:08:07,769 in no way creepy... 278 00:08:07,895 --> 00:08:12,607 grand romantic gesture 279 00:08:07,895 --> 00:08:12,607 that we all know Robin loves. 280 00:08:12,733 --> 00:08:14,651 Oh! 281 00:08:14,776 --> 00:08:17,070 So I just walk up to her 282 00:08:14,776 --> 00:08:17,070 in Red Square 283 00:08:17,195 --> 00:08:18,238 with a dozen roses? 284 00:08:19,280 --> 00:08:20,949 Or float down to her 285 00:08:21,074 --> 00:08:22,743 in my hot air balloon 286 00:08:22,868 --> 00:08:25,078 with ten dozen roses! 287 00:08:25,119 --> 00:08:28,164 Yes, that's perfect! 288 00:08:28,289 --> 00:08:29,416 Not like this, Lily. 289 00:08:29,541 --> 00:08:31,084 Not like this. 290 00:08:31,167 --> 00:08:34,379 If you'll excuse me, 291 00:08:31,167 --> 00:08:34,379 I've got some sonnets to write. 292 00:08:34,504 --> 00:08:36,798 Stay put, Ted. 293 00:08:34,504 --> 00:08:36,798 You're gonna want to hear this. 294 00:08:38,800 --> 00:08:40,677 Guys, what's this? 295 00:08:40,802 --> 00:08:42,679 And Marshall and Lily 296 00:08:40,802 --> 00:08:42,679 explained. 297 00:08:42,804 --> 00:08:44,639 It all started ten years 298 00:08:42,804 --> 00:08:44,639 earlier. 299 00:08:44,765 --> 00:08:46,433 They had been looking 300 00:08:44,765 --> 00:08:46,433 for a new hobby 301 00:08:46,558 --> 00:08:48,142 they could do as a couple. 302 00:08:48,268 --> 00:08:50,687 I already missed 303 00:08:48,268 --> 00:08:50,687 the beginner's lesson. 304 00:08:50,812 --> 00:08:52,230 Maybe I shouldn't even go. 305 00:08:53,565 --> 00:08:54,775 Ah, screw it. 306 00:08:54,900 --> 00:08:57,110 I've seen the Olympics. 307 00:08:54,900 --> 00:08:57,110 I know what I'm doing. 308 00:08:57,235 --> 00:08:59,237 I'm going skiing, bitches! 309 00:09:12,125 --> 00:09:13,501 He's gonna break 310 00:09:12,125 --> 00:09:13,501 his leg. 311 00:09:13,627 --> 00:09:14,962 He's not gonna 312 00:09:13,627 --> 00:09:14,962 break his leg. 313 00:09:15,128 --> 00:09:16,463 20 bucks says he does. 314 00:09:20,341 --> 00:09:22,260 "Lily bets Marshall 315 00:09:22,385 --> 00:09:26,139 that Ted 316 00:09:22,385 --> 00:09:26,139 will break his leg skiing." 317 00:09:30,644 --> 00:09:32,771 You would be amazed. 318 00:09:32,896 --> 00:09:35,690 People fall off ski lifts 319 00:09:32,896 --> 00:09:35,690 all the time. 320 00:09:35,816 --> 00:09:38,401 Well, I gotta hit the head. 321 00:09:43,782 --> 00:09:47,661 Well, he didn't 322 00:09:43,782 --> 00:09:47,661 break his leg. 323 00:09:47,786 --> 00:09:49,955 Yeah, I gotta say that, um, 324 00:09:50,163 --> 00:09:53,374 making money off this bet 325 00:09:50,163 --> 00:09:53,374 just makes me feel... 326 00:09:53,500 --> 00:09:54,918 More alive than 327 00:09:53,500 --> 00:09:54,918 you've felt in years? 328 00:09:55,043 --> 00:09:56,878 Yes! 329 00:09:55,043 --> 00:09:56,878 New hobby! 330 00:09:58,713 --> 00:10:01,508 We need a cash box, 331 00:09:58,713 --> 00:10:01,508 some glitter and some glue! 332 00:10:01,633 --> 00:10:04,011 You've been 333 00:10:01,633 --> 00:10:04,011 betting on us? 334 00:10:04,135 --> 00:10:05,929 Like we're a 335 00:10:04,135 --> 00:10:05,929 couple of hobos 336 00:10:06,054 --> 00:10:07,514 fighting over 337 00:10:06,054 --> 00:10:07,514 a sandwich 338 00:10:07,639 --> 00:10:09,933 in some psycho preppy 339 00:10:07,639 --> 00:10:09,933 kid's backyard? 340 00:10:10,058 --> 00:10:12,310 No, this is just 341 00:10:10,058 --> 00:10:12,310 what happens in marriage. 342 00:10:12,435 --> 00:10:13,311 You get bored. 343 00:10:13,436 --> 00:10:15,022 You run out 344 00:10:13,436 --> 00:10:15,022 of things to do. 345 00:10:15,146 --> 00:10:16,439 We were making models. 346 00:10:16,564 --> 00:10:18,191 You single people 347 00:10:16,564 --> 00:10:18,191 are out there 348 00:10:18,316 --> 00:10:20,527 with the drinking 349 00:10:18,316 --> 00:10:20,527 and the sleeping around... 350 00:10:20,652 --> 00:10:21,903 Model airplanes. 351 00:10:22,029 --> 00:10:24,072 The grinding 352 00:10:22,029 --> 00:10:24,072 and the bumping 353 00:10:24,197 --> 00:10:26,033 and the hot sweaty bodies. 354 00:10:26,157 --> 00:10:28,326 with little propellers 355 00:10:26,157 --> 00:10:28,326 that spin. 356 00:10:28,451 --> 00:10:30,244 Oh, this one looks 357 00:10:28,451 --> 00:10:30,244 interesting. 358 00:10:30,370 --> 00:10:32,288 Lily, I thought you said 359 00:10:30,370 --> 00:10:32,288 you wanted to. 360 00:10:32,413 --> 00:10:33,707 It was your idea. 361 00:10:33,832 --> 00:10:36,960 I starved myself for a week 362 00:10:33,832 --> 00:10:36,960 to get camera-ready. 363 00:10:37,085 --> 00:10:38,795 You had a bear claw 364 00:10:37,085 --> 00:10:38,795 for breakfast. 365 00:10:38,920 --> 00:10:40,922 Yeah, a bear claw. 366 00:10:41,048 --> 00:10:43,216 I-I changed my mind. 367 00:10:43,341 --> 00:10:47,136 I-I just don't want Barney 368 00:10:43,341 --> 00:10:47,136 to see us doing it. 369 00:10:47,261 --> 00:10:48,972 Barney is never gonna see this. 370 00:10:49,097 --> 00:10:51,224 Oh, come on. It's Barney. 371 00:10:51,349 --> 00:10:54,019 Eventually, 372 00:10:51,349 --> 00:10:54,019 somehow he's gonna see it. 373 00:10:54,143 --> 00:10:55,228 Want to bet? 374 00:10:55,353 --> 00:11:00,025 So there really is a sex tape. 375 00:11:06,781 --> 00:11:10,118 Anyhoozles, 376 00:11:06,781 --> 00:11:10,118 just... long-term bets, 377 00:11:10,243 --> 00:11:11,912 just a silly thing we do. 378 00:11:12,037 --> 00:11:13,246 What about you, Ted? 379 00:11:13,287 --> 00:11:15,498 Your hair's looking good. 380 00:11:15,623 --> 00:11:17,959 "Lily bets Marshall 381 00:11:15,623 --> 00:11:17,959 that Ted and Robin 382 00:11:18,085 --> 00:11:19,419 won't end up together." 383 00:11:20,837 --> 00:11:22,756 Wow. 384 00:11:22,881 --> 00:11:25,383 So now it's 385 00:11:22,881 --> 00:11:25,383 becoming clear why... 386 00:11:25,508 --> 00:11:27,802 you've been trying to sabotage 387 00:11:25,508 --> 00:11:27,802 my future happiness. 388 00:11:27,928 --> 00:11:29,262 To win a bet. 389 00:11:29,345 --> 00:11:30,471 Come on, Ted. 390 00:11:30,597 --> 00:11:32,599 We made that bet 391 00:11:30,597 --> 00:11:32,599 so long ago. 392 00:11:32,724 --> 00:11:36,477 And boy, it's been 393 00:11:32,724 --> 00:11:36,477 a real nail-biter. 394 00:11:36,603 --> 00:11:38,939 Ted and Stella 395 00:11:36,603 --> 00:11:38,939 got engaged. 396 00:11:39,064 --> 00:11:40,065 Pay up. 397 00:11:40,273 --> 00:11:41,566 Not yet. 398 00:11:41,691 --> 00:11:43,526 We are driving 399 00:11:41,691 --> 00:11:43,526 to the wedding. 400 00:11:43,651 --> 00:11:44,861 Pay up. 401 00:11:44,986 --> 00:11:46,821 Not yet. 402 00:11:48,281 --> 00:11:50,700 We are at the wedding. 403 00:11:50,825 --> 00:11:51,701 Pay up. 404 00:11:51,826 --> 00:11:53,327 Not yet. 405 00:11:56,289 --> 00:11:58,583 Damn it. 406 00:11:58,708 --> 00:12:00,376 I can't believe you guys! 407 00:12:00,501 --> 00:12:01,795 I got left at the alter, 408 00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:03,588 and all you cared about 409 00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:03,588 was some stupid bet? 410 00:12:03,713 --> 00:12:06,299 I never stopped rooting 411 00:12:03,713 --> 00:12:06,299 for you, but I... 412 00:12:06,340 --> 00:12:08,301 Ted, I'm not rooting 413 00:12:06,340 --> 00:12:08,301 against you. 414 00:12:08,342 --> 00:12:10,553 I just don't think Robin's 415 00:12:08,342 --> 00:12:10,553 the girl you marry. 416 00:12:10,678 --> 00:12:13,306 That's why I made 417 00:12:10,678 --> 00:12:13,306 the stupid bet to begin with. 418 00:12:13,347 --> 00:12:15,349 I mean, yes, 419 00:12:13,347 --> 00:12:15,349 it's five years later, 420 00:12:15,475 --> 00:12:17,310 and you haven't settled down 421 00:12:15,475 --> 00:12:17,310 with anyone else, 422 00:12:17,351 --> 00:12:20,105 but you haven't settled down 423 00:12:17,351 --> 00:12:20,105 with Robin, either. 424 00:12:21,064 --> 00:12:22,523 There must be 425 00:12:21,064 --> 00:12:22,523 a reason for that. 426 00:12:22,649 --> 00:12:24,358 What's standing 427 00:12:22,649 --> 00:12:24,358 in the way? 428 00:12:31,992 --> 00:12:33,201 God... 429 00:12:33,326 --> 00:12:36,204 if you help me find 430 00:12:33,326 --> 00:12:36,204 this sex tape, 431 00:12:36,329 --> 00:12:38,581 I am going to make 432 00:12:36,329 --> 00:12:38,581 some changes in my life. 433 00:12:38,706 --> 00:12:41,084 I am going to stop 434 00:12:38,706 --> 00:12:41,084 sleeping around, 435 00:12:41,209 --> 00:12:43,920 quit drinking so much, 436 00:12:41,209 --> 00:12:43,920 no more shenanigans. 437 00:12:44,045 --> 00:12:46,547 I am going to devote 438 00:12:44,045 --> 00:12:46,547 my entire life 439 00:12:46,673 --> 00:12:50,343 to doing good deeds, 440 00:12:46,673 --> 00:12:50,343 and praising your name. 441 00:12:50,384 --> 00:12:52,386 Is this what you're 442 00:12:50,384 --> 00:12:52,386 looking for, Mr. Barney? 443 00:12:54,222 --> 00:12:55,765 Never mind, bro. Found it. 444 00:12:57,976 --> 00:12:59,602 I found it! 445 00:12:59,727 --> 00:13:02,856 Sweet glory hallelujah, 446 00:12:59,727 --> 00:13:02,856 I found it, Ted. 447 00:13:02,981 --> 00:13:05,192 You're the only idiot I know 448 00:13:02,981 --> 00:13:05,192 who still owns a VCR, 449 00:13:05,358 --> 00:13:06,901 so you are 450 00:13:05,358 --> 00:13:06,901 the lucky winner of the 451 00:13:07,027 --> 00:13:09,403 "Who gets to sit next to me 452 00:13:07,027 --> 00:13:09,403 and watch our best friends 453 00:13:09,529 --> 00:13:11,489 go bananas all over each other?" 454 00:13:09,529 --> 00:13:11,489 sweepstakes. 455 00:13:11,614 --> 00:13:14,701 To the outdated 456 00:13:11,614 --> 00:13:14,701 viewing device! 457 00:13:14,826 --> 00:13:16,577 And then I realized 458 00:13:14,826 --> 00:13:16,577 why Robin and I 459 00:13:16,703 --> 00:13:18,913 hadn't gotten back together 460 00:13:16,703 --> 00:13:18,913 in the last five years. 461 00:13:19,039 --> 00:13:21,166 Oh, my God. 462 00:13:21,374 --> 00:13:22,959 Robin's in love with you. 463 00:13:30,008 --> 00:13:31,676 I can't believe 464 00:13:30,008 --> 00:13:31,676 I didn't see it before. 465 00:13:31,801 --> 00:13:33,386 Robin is in love with you. 466 00:13:33,511 --> 00:13:35,763 No, she's not. 467 00:13:33,511 --> 00:13:35,763 Trust me. 468 00:13:35,889 --> 00:13:37,265 Yes, she is. 469 00:13:37,390 --> 00:13:39,433 Something happened 470 00:13:37,390 --> 00:13:39,433 between you guys. 471 00:13:39,559 --> 00:13:41,102 That's why 472 00:13:39,559 --> 00:13:41,102 you broke up with Nora. 473 00:13:41,228 --> 00:13:43,980 That night, 474 00:13:41,228 --> 00:13:43,980 I saw you in her room, 475 00:13:44,105 --> 00:13:46,524 there were rose petals, 476 00:13:44,105 --> 00:13:46,524 candles... 477 00:13:46,649 --> 00:13:48,401 You saw that? 478 00:13:48,442 --> 00:13:50,528 Well, then, maybe you also saw 479 00:13:50,653 --> 00:13:53,656 those rose petals and candles 480 00:13:50,653 --> 00:13:53,656 going into a garbage bag. 481 00:13:53,781 --> 00:13:55,700 And then Barney 482 00:13:53,781 --> 00:13:55,700 told me everything. 483 00:13:55,825 --> 00:13:58,411 How he and Robin hooked up. 484 00:13:58,536 --> 00:14:01,622 How he broke up with Nora 485 00:13:58,536 --> 00:14:01,622 to be with her. 486 00:14:01,748 --> 00:14:04,542 How he thought she would do 487 00:14:01,748 --> 00:14:04,542 the same for him. 488 00:14:04,667 --> 00:14:07,128 How she broke his heart. 489 00:14:10,882 --> 00:14:12,759 She chose Kevin. 490 00:14:12,884 --> 00:14:15,262 It hurt, but... 491 00:14:15,428 --> 00:14:16,888 I guess they're in love. 492 00:14:17,013 --> 00:14:18,306 They broke up last night. 493 00:14:18,431 --> 00:14:20,516 Bummer. 494 00:14:20,641 --> 00:14:23,811 Anyway, let's make our own bets 495 00:14:20,641 --> 00:14:23,811 about this sex tape. 496 00:14:23,937 --> 00:14:26,231 I've got Marshall 497 00:14:23,937 --> 00:14:26,231 with a surprise piercing 498 00:14:26,439 --> 00:14:27,774 at five-to-one odds, 499 00:14:27,899 --> 00:14:30,443 Lily with a landing strip, 500 00:14:27,899 --> 00:14:30,443 ten-to-one, 501 00:14:30,568 --> 00:14:32,237 Marshall with a landing strip, 502 00:14:30,568 --> 00:14:32,237 even money. 503 00:14:32,445 --> 00:14:34,739 I don't believe this. 504 00:14:34,864 --> 00:14:36,449 You were in love with Robin, 505 00:14:36,532 --> 00:14:38,451 you find out she's single, 506 00:14:36,532 --> 00:14:38,451 and your reaction is "Bummer"? 507 00:14:38,576 --> 00:14:39,660 What do you want me to say, Ted? 508 00:14:39,786 --> 00:14:42,247 Whatever I 509 00:14:39,786 --> 00:14:42,247 thought was there, 510 00:14:42,455 --> 00:14:45,125 she thought differently. 511 00:14:45,250 --> 00:14:47,961 So... no, I don't care 512 00:14:45,250 --> 00:14:47,961 that Robin is single again. 513 00:14:48,086 --> 00:14:51,839 So if Robin started dating 514 00:14:48,086 --> 00:14:51,839 someone else, you wouldn't mind? 515 00:14:51,965 --> 00:14:52,966 Nope. 516 00:14:53,091 --> 00:14:55,509 Even if that somebody else 517 00:14:53,091 --> 00:14:55,509 was me? 518 00:14:56,552 --> 00:14:59,722 Even if that somebody else 519 00:14:56,552 --> 00:14:59,722 was you. 520 00:14:59,847 --> 00:15:01,599 Really? 521 00:14:59,847 --> 00:15:01,599 Really. 522 00:15:01,724 --> 00:15:03,601 Hey, bros before hos, right? 523 00:15:04,685 --> 00:15:06,271 No matter how mad she made me, 524 00:15:06,479 --> 00:15:08,856 Robin's still my bro. 525 00:15:08,982 --> 00:15:10,817 And if, uh, you make her happy, 526 00:15:10,942 --> 00:15:13,486 then that makes me happy. 527 00:15:13,611 --> 00:15:16,990 Barney, you've really grown up, 528 00:15:13,611 --> 00:15:16,990 you know that? 529 00:15:17,115 --> 00:15:18,574 Thanks. 530 00:15:18,699 --> 00:15:21,077 Now let's watch our two best 531 00:15:18,699 --> 00:15:21,077 friends have sex on tape. 532 00:15:21,202 --> 00:15:22,620 I'll make the popcorn. 533 00:15:24,038 --> 00:15:24,956 Don't watch that tape! 534 00:15:25,081 --> 00:15:26,958 Watch that tape! 535 00:15:27,083 --> 00:15:28,501 Well, sorry, I just really 536 00:15:27,083 --> 00:15:28,501 want to win the bet. 537 00:15:28,584 --> 00:15:30,128 And here we go. 538 00:15:30,253 --> 00:15:32,588 O-okay. Okay, fine, Barney. 539 00:15:32,713 --> 00:15:34,715 Watch our dirty little home 540 00:15:32,713 --> 00:15:34,715 movie, but be forewarned, 541 00:15:34,841 --> 00:15:37,093 at about the one minute mark, 542 00:15:37,218 --> 00:15:38,886 you're going to see me 543 00:15:37,218 --> 00:15:38,886 make this face. 544 00:15:41,222 --> 00:15:42,932 Oh, God, 545 00:15:41,222 --> 00:15:42,932 that's the face you made 546 00:15:43,057 --> 00:15:44,267 the day we rode motorcycles. 547 00:15:43,057 --> 00:15:44,267 Yeah. 548 00:15:44,392 --> 00:15:45,726 Yeah. You really 549 00:15:44,392 --> 00:15:45,726 want to see that? 550 00:15:45,852 --> 00:15:48,521 A-and do you want 551 00:15:45,852 --> 00:15:48,521 to hear me go, uh... 552 00:15:52,525 --> 00:15:55,069 It can't sound like that. 553 00:15:52,525 --> 00:15:55,069 It can't. 554 00:15:55,195 --> 00:15:56,821 I know that noise, I've heard it 555 00:15:55,195 --> 00:15:56,821 through the walls. 556 00:15:56,946 --> 00:15:58,531 I thought the neighbors 557 00:15:56,946 --> 00:15:58,531 had a sick cat. 558 00:15:58,614 --> 00:15:59,657 Okay, but, Barney, 559 00:15:58,614 --> 00:15:59,657 just remember, 560 00:15:59,782 --> 00:16:01,659 you'll also be seeing 561 00:15:59,782 --> 00:16:01,659 a lot of this: 562 00:16:01,784 --> 00:16:03,911 Oh, yeah. 563 00:16:01,784 --> 00:16:03,911 Oh, yeah. 564 00:16:04,037 --> 00:16:05,579 It's this, but 565 00:16:04,037 --> 00:16:05,579 I'm not pregnant. 566 00:16:05,705 --> 00:16:08,916 My skin is loose, 567 00:16:05,705 --> 00:16:08,916 like an elephant. 568 00:16:09,042 --> 00:16:11,211 My boobs are 569 00:16:09,042 --> 00:16:11,211 perky and plump. 570 00:16:11,336 --> 00:16:13,338 I slobber 571 00:16:11,336 --> 00:16:13,338 like a confused old dog. 572 00:16:13,546 --> 00:16:15,589 I slap my own ass. 573 00:16:13,546 --> 00:16:15,589 I slap my own ass! 574 00:16:20,303 --> 00:16:22,680 Barney... 575 00:16:22,805 --> 00:16:23,848 that was my VCR. 576 00:16:23,973 --> 00:16:25,975 Ted... 577 00:16:26,100 --> 00:16:28,102 it was a VCR. 578 00:16:32,023 --> 00:16:33,816 A week later, I picked Robin up 579 00:16:32,023 --> 00:16:33,816 at the airport. 580 00:16:43,410 --> 00:16:45,995 And took her out to dinner 581 00:16:43,410 --> 00:16:45,995 at her favorite restaurant. 582 00:16:48,206 --> 00:16:51,084 And by the end of the night, 583 00:16:48,206 --> 00:16:51,084 one thing had become clear: 584 00:16:51,209 --> 00:16:53,420 It's not going to happen, is it? 585 00:16:55,129 --> 00:16:56,130 I'm sorry. 586 00:16:58,925 --> 00:17:00,301 It's because of Barney. 587 00:17:00,427 --> 00:17:01,802 What? 588 00:17:01,928 --> 00:17:03,346 No. 589 00:17:03,471 --> 00:17:04,764 Barney and I... we... 590 00:17:04,889 --> 00:17:07,934 No. No. It's just... 591 00:17:08,059 --> 00:17:11,187 You know, things have 592 00:17:08,059 --> 00:17:11,187 just been so crazy lately. 593 00:17:12,313 --> 00:17:15,900 Everything in my life 594 00:17:12,313 --> 00:17:15,900 is... unstable. 595 00:17:16,025 --> 00:17:18,945 I mean, you're one of the few 596 00:17:16,025 --> 00:17:18,945 things that I can count on. 597 00:17:20,238 --> 00:17:23,616 And... I really don't 598 00:17:20,238 --> 00:17:23,616 want to mess that up. 599 00:17:24,825 --> 00:17:27,954 We-we... we still have our deal, 600 00:17:24,825 --> 00:17:27,954 right? 601 00:17:28,079 --> 00:17:31,499 If we're both still... 602 00:17:28,079 --> 00:17:31,499 single when we're 40? 603 00:17:31,624 --> 00:17:33,626 Yeah. Yeah. 604 00:17:36,421 --> 00:17:38,465 No. Look... I'm sorry. 605 00:17:38,631 --> 00:17:40,383 I-I can't do that anymore. 606 00:17:41,634 --> 00:17:43,261 As long as the door 607 00:17:41,634 --> 00:17:43,261 is even a little bit open, 608 00:17:43,386 --> 00:17:45,638 I have this feeling 609 00:17:43,386 --> 00:17:45,638 that I'll just be... 610 00:17:45,721 --> 00:17:49,016 waiting around to see if I win 611 00:17:45,721 --> 00:17:49,016 the lottery when you turn 40. 612 00:17:50,435 --> 00:17:52,979 I think you know 613 00:17:50,435 --> 00:17:52,979 how you feel about me now, 614 00:17:53,104 --> 00:17:56,732 and... I don't think time's 615 00:17:53,104 --> 00:17:56,732 going to change that. 616 00:17:57,984 --> 00:18:00,653 Just tell me. 617 00:18:00,778 --> 00:18:02,405 Do you love me? 618 00:18:08,411 --> 00:18:10,413 No. 619 00:18:18,212 --> 00:18:19,755 I'm sorry. 620 00:18:19,880 --> 00:18:21,715 We're great as friends. 621 00:18:21,841 --> 00:18:22,883 Let's just... 622 00:18:23,009 --> 00:18:24,469 Let's just forget 623 00:18:23,009 --> 00:18:24,469 I ever said anything. 624 00:18:31,725 --> 00:18:33,478 Bar. Alone. Now. 625 00:18:33,686 --> 00:18:34,979 It's just a bump 626 00:18:33,686 --> 00:18:34,979 in the road. 627 00:18:35,104 --> 00:18:36,689 You guys are meant 628 00:18:35,104 --> 00:18:36,689 to be together. 629 00:18:36,730 --> 00:18:37,982 You can't give up. 630 00:18:38,107 --> 00:18:39,192 You... I-it can still happen. 631 00:18:39,317 --> 00:18:40,401 No. Marshall... 632 00:18:40,527 --> 00:18:41,986 What about 633 00:18:40,527 --> 00:18:41,986 the hot air balloon thing, 634 00:18:42,111 --> 00:18:43,821 with the ten dozen roses? 635 00:18:43,946 --> 00:18:45,573 And how's the sonnet 636 00:18:43,946 --> 00:18:45,573 coming, buddy? 637 00:18:43,946 --> 00:18:45,573 Dude. 638 00:18:45,698 --> 00:18:47,867 You bet on the wrong horse. 639 00:18:45,698 --> 00:18:47,867 Let it go. 640 00:18:48,826 --> 00:18:50,411 Believe it or not, 641 00:18:50,537 --> 00:18:52,163 I'm happy about this. I'm... 642 00:18:52,288 --> 00:18:54,123 I can finally move on. 643 00:18:55,333 --> 00:18:56,709 This is a good thing. 644 00:18:56,792 --> 00:18:58,794 Really. 645 00:19:04,258 --> 00:19:05,301 Hey, Robin. 646 00:19:05,426 --> 00:19:06,802 Oh, hey. 647 00:19:05,426 --> 00:19:06,802 Hey. 648 00:19:06,927 --> 00:19:09,013 Hey. Uh, look, before I forget, 649 00:19:06,927 --> 00:19:09,013 here's Lily's hairdryer. 650 00:19:09,138 --> 00:19:11,474 I borrowed it, like, 651 00:19:09,138 --> 00:19:11,474 a million years ago. 652 00:19:11,599 --> 00:19:12,975 Yeah, you can keep that. 653 00:19:13,100 --> 00:19:14,352 Um... Hey, listen, 654 00:19:14,477 --> 00:19:15,978 Ted told me what happened 655 00:19:14,477 --> 00:19:15,978 with you guys, 656 00:19:16,103 --> 00:19:17,730 and he says that 657 00:19:16,103 --> 00:19:17,730 he's at peace with it. 658 00:19:17,855 --> 00:19:19,482 Oh, really? 659 00:19:19,607 --> 00:19:20,941 That's good. 660 00:19:22,485 --> 00:19:23,777 He's lying, Robin. 661 00:19:23,903 --> 00:19:27,114 He's trying to be strong, 662 00:19:23,903 --> 00:19:27,114 but it's killing him, 663 00:19:27,240 --> 00:19:30,076 and so, as his best friend, 664 00:19:30,201 --> 00:19:32,078 I have to say something that... 665 00:19:32,203 --> 00:19:34,330 he loves you 666 00:19:32,203 --> 00:19:34,330 just way too much to say. 667 00:19:35,748 --> 00:19:38,042 You gotta move out. 668 00:19:40,086 --> 00:19:42,338 I know. 669 00:20:20,793 --> 00:20:23,003 Here's the funny thing: 670 00:20:23,129 --> 00:20:26,382 In my own crazy way, 671 00:20:23,129 --> 00:20:26,382 I was kind of happy. 672 00:20:26,507 --> 00:20:29,718 For the first time in years, 673 00:20:26,507 --> 00:20:29,718 there was no little part of me 674 00:20:29,843 --> 00:20:32,179 clinging to the dream 675 00:20:29,843 --> 00:20:32,179 of being with Robin. 676 00:20:32,305 --> 00:20:34,682 Which meant, 677 00:20:32,305 --> 00:20:34,682 for the first time in years, 678 00:20:34,807 --> 00:20:36,309 the world was wide open. 679 00:20:36,434 --> 00:20:38,185 Because, kids... 680 00:20:38,311 --> 00:20:40,229 when a door closes, 681 00:20:40,354 --> 00:20:42,898 well... 682 00:20:43,023 --> 00:20:44,900 you know the rest 683 00:20:57,288 --> 00:20:58,498 For Ted's sake, 684 00:20:57,288 --> 00:20:58,498 I hate to say this, 685 00:20:58,623 --> 00:21:00,749 but... pay up. 686 00:21:03,836 --> 00:21:06,088 Not yet.