1 00:00:05,019 --> 00:00:07,813 "Let's get this party started." 2 00:00:09,231 --> 00:00:10,524 Hey, can you 3 00:00:09,231 --> 00:00:10,524 push the button? 4 00:00:10,524 --> 00:00:12,317 Do not touch 5 00:00:10,524 --> 00:00:12,317 that button. 6 00:00:12,317 --> 00:00:14,070 Just give it a little push. 7 00:00:12,317 --> 00:00:14,070 Don't push it. 8 00:00:14,070 --> 00:00:15,404 Just push it a little. 9 00:00:14,070 --> 00:00:15,404 Don't listen to him. 10 00:00:15,404 --> 00:00:16,906 Half of it, halfway, halfway... 11 00:00:15,404 --> 00:00:16,906 Don't even touch it. 12 00:00:16,906 --> 00:00:18,407 Why can't I 13 00:00:16,906 --> 00:00:18,407 push the button? 14 00:00:18,407 --> 00:00:20,451 Because whenever Barney 15 00:00:18,407 --> 00:00:20,451 sees a button... any button... 16 00:00:20,451 --> 00:00:22,120 he has to push it. 17 00:00:24,246 --> 00:00:26,290 Sorry. 18 00:00:26,290 --> 00:00:27,917 Why are you so mad? 19 00:00:27,917 --> 00:00:30,086 Because my rehearsal dinner 20 00:00:30,086 --> 00:00:32,296 was supposed to start 21 00:00:30,086 --> 00:00:32,296 ten minutes ago. 22 00:00:32,296 --> 00:00:34,632 But instead of stuffing my face 23 00:00:34,632 --> 00:00:36,050 with hors d'oeuvres 24 00:00:36,050 --> 00:00:38,177 that I have been dreaming 25 00:00:36,050 --> 00:00:38,177 about for months, 26 00:00:38,177 --> 00:00:40,638 I am in a laser tag 27 00:00:40,638 --> 00:00:42,347 security office, 28 00:00:42,347 --> 00:00:45,768 waiting for the police 29 00:00:42,347 --> 00:00:45,768 to arrest my fiancé 30 00:00:45,768 --> 00:00:47,478 for causing a disturbance. 31 00:00:47,478 --> 00:00:48,604 Hey, you said "fiancé." 32 00:00:48,604 --> 00:00:50,272 That's a good sign. 33 00:00:50,272 --> 00:00:51,732 Now what do you say 34 00:00:50,272 --> 00:00:51,732 we give that old button a push? 35 00:00:51,732 --> 00:00:54,318 Take a good look at 36 00:00:51,732 --> 00:00:54,318 this face, Barney, okay? 37 00:00:54,318 --> 00:00:57,029 'Cause it'll be useful 38 00:00:54,318 --> 00:00:57,029 for the future. 39 00:00:57,947 --> 00:00:59,824 This is my "pretty mad" face. 40 00:00:59,824 --> 00:01:01,700 Well, then, we've got a problem. 41 00:01:01,700 --> 00:01:04,578 'Cause it looks a lot like 42 00:01:01,700 --> 00:01:04,578 your "pretty hungry" face. 43 00:01:04,578 --> 00:01:06,164 I'm missing 44 00:01:04,578 --> 00:01:06,164 the bacon-wrapped figs! 45 00:01:06,164 --> 00:01:07,957 Please push the button! 46 00:01:20,803 --> 00:01:22,638 Why is it 47 00:01:20,803 --> 00:01:22,638 so cold in here? 48 00:01:22,638 --> 00:01:24,389 You trying to get me to talk 49 00:01:22,638 --> 00:01:24,389 or something? 50 00:01:24,389 --> 00:01:25,557 Not really. 51 00:01:25,557 --> 00:01:27,101 In fact, if you could just 52 00:01:25,557 --> 00:01:27,101 sit there quietly... 53 00:01:27,101 --> 00:01:28,602 Fine, I'll talk. 54 00:01:28,602 --> 00:01:30,562 It all started a few months ago, 55 00:01:30,562 --> 00:01:33,774 when I had the most 56 00:01:30,562 --> 00:01:33,774 awesome idea ever. 57 00:01:33,774 --> 00:01:36,610 Laser tag 58 00:01:33,774 --> 00:01:36,610 rehearsal dinner! 59 00:01:36,610 --> 00:01:38,570 That might be the worst idea 60 00:01:36,610 --> 00:01:38,570 you've ever had, 61 00:01:38,570 --> 00:01:39,780 which is saying a lot. 62 00:01:39,780 --> 00:01:42,158 Name one bad idea 63 00:01:39,780 --> 00:01:42,158 I've ever had. 64 00:01:42,158 --> 00:01:43,951 Gluten-free edible panties. 65 00:01:43,951 --> 00:01:45,244 Hot dog on a stick 66 00:01:43,951 --> 00:01:45,244 on a bun. 67 00:01:45,244 --> 00:01:46,829 Inflatable sex toy life raft. 68 00:01:46,829 --> 00:01:48,206 The breast 69 00:01:46,829 --> 00:01:48,206 augmentation channel. 70 00:01:48,206 --> 00:01:49,915 Single malt 71 00:01:48,206 --> 00:01:49,915 Scotch tape. 72 00:01:49,915 --> 00:01:50,916 The time you ran for mayor. 73 00:01:50,916 --> 00:01:52,584 I still have 12,000 buttons 74 00:01:50,916 --> 00:01:52,584 that say, 75 00:01:52,584 --> 00:01:54,586 "The only poll I care about 76 00:01:52,584 --> 00:01:54,586 is in my pants." 77 00:01:55,754 --> 00:01:57,215 Barney, planning 78 00:01:55,754 --> 00:01:57,215 a wedding 79 00:01:57,215 --> 00:01:58,716 is all about compromise. 80 00:01:58,716 --> 00:02:00,009 Do you remember that one night, 81 00:02:00,009 --> 00:02:01,593 right after we got engaged? 82 00:02:01,593 --> 00:02:03,387 Where is this wedding 83 00:02:01,593 --> 00:02:03,387 gonna be, anyway? 84 00:02:03,387 --> 00:02:04,972 You know, I thought 85 00:02:03,387 --> 00:02:04,972 it might be nice 86 00:02:04,972 --> 00:02:06,515 to get married 87 00:02:04,972 --> 00:02:06,515 in Canada. 88 00:02:06,515 --> 00:02:08,226 I mean, it's where 89 00:02:06,515 --> 00:02:08,226 I'm from, and... 90 00:02:09,185 --> 00:02:10,352 Okay. 91 00:02:10,352 --> 00:02:12,271 Let's have it. 92 00:02:10,352 --> 00:02:12,271 Get it over with, 93 00:02:12,271 --> 00:02:13,355 get it all out 94 00:02:12,271 --> 00:02:13,355 of your system. 95 00:02:13,355 --> 00:02:14,356 I'm the groom, 96 00:02:14,356 --> 00:02:15,691 I'm the groom, 97 00:02:14,356 --> 00:02:15,691 I might as well start. 98 00:02:15,691 --> 00:02:17,442 Canada? 99 00:02:15,691 --> 00:02:17,442 What, are we gonna 100 00:02:17,442 --> 00:02:19,570 walk down the aisle to 101 00:02:17,442 --> 00:02:19,570 Crash Test Dummies? 102 00:02:19,570 --> 00:02:20,738 Play's to Marshall. 103 00:02:20,738 --> 00:02:22,198 Canada? 104 00:02:20,738 --> 00:02:22,198 What are you gonna do, 105 00:02:22,198 --> 00:02:24,366 hire a regular dog sled 106 00:02:22,198 --> 00:02:24,366 or a stretch? 107 00:02:24,950 --> 00:02:25,868 Canada? 108 00:02:25,868 --> 00:02:27,703 Are you registered 109 00:02:25,868 --> 00:02:27,703 at Tim Hortons? 110 00:02:27,703 --> 00:02:28,662 Canada. 111 00:02:28,662 --> 00:02:30,248 Oh, does 112 00:02:28,662 --> 00:02:30,248 the organist play 113 00:02:30,248 --> 00:02:31,373 wearing mittens? 114 00:02:31,373 --> 00:02:32,875 Canada? How are you gonna 115 00:02:32,875 --> 00:02:34,126 slip the ring on 116 00:02:32,875 --> 00:02:34,126 the bride's finger 117 00:02:34,126 --> 00:02:35,419 if she's wearing 118 00:02:34,126 --> 00:02:35,419 mittens? 119 00:02:36,587 --> 00:02:37,838 Two mitten jokes 120 00:02:36,587 --> 00:02:37,838 in a row? 121 00:02:37,838 --> 00:02:40,132 So... you're pretty 122 00:02:37,838 --> 00:02:40,132 much done, then? 123 00:02:40,132 --> 00:02:42,384 Kids... we weren't even close. 124 00:02:42,384 --> 00:02:43,635 Canada. 125 00:02:43,635 --> 00:02:45,304 What do we ask on 126 00:02:43,635 --> 00:02:45,304 the wedding invitation? 127 00:02:45,304 --> 00:02:47,973 "Will you be having 128 00:02:45,304 --> 00:02:47,973 the elk or the moose?" 129 00:02:47,973 --> 00:02:49,058 Canada. 130 00:02:49,058 --> 00:02:50,976 What, are you gonna 131 00:02:49,058 --> 00:02:50,976 walk down the aisle 132 00:02:50,976 --> 00:02:52,228 wearing snowshoes? 133 00:02:53,229 --> 00:02:54,646 Canada. 134 00:02:54,646 --> 00:02:56,774 What, is everyone gonna have 135 00:02:54,646 --> 00:02:56,774 access to universal healthcare 136 00:02:56,774 --> 00:02:58,859 so no one has to choose 137 00:02:56,774 --> 00:02:58,859 between going bankrupt 138 00:02:58,859 --> 00:03:01,486 and treating 139 00:02:58,859 --> 00:03:01,486 a life-threatening illness? 140 00:03:01,486 --> 00:03:02,738 Canada? 141 00:03:02,738 --> 00:03:04,656 W-What's the band gonna play 142 00:03:02,738 --> 00:03:04,656 for your first dance? 143 00:03:04,656 --> 00:03:06,117 Crash Test Dummies? 144 00:03:06,117 --> 00:03:07,659 See, it's funny 145 00:03:07,659 --> 00:03:09,078 'cause who gets a band? 146 00:03:09,078 --> 00:03:10,955 Enough. 147 00:03:09,078 --> 00:03:10,955 It was just an idea. 148 00:03:10,955 --> 00:03:12,081 Okay, okay. 149 00:03:12,081 --> 00:03:13,791 Seriously, Robin, 150 00:03:12,081 --> 00:03:13,791 doing it here in New York 151 00:03:13,791 --> 00:03:15,834 would be easier, since 152 00:03:13,791 --> 00:03:15,834 all of our friends 153 00:03:15,834 --> 00:03:17,461 and a lot of 154 00:03:15,834 --> 00:03:17,461 our family are here. 155 00:03:17,461 --> 00:03:20,965 But... I want you 156 00:03:17,461 --> 00:03:20,965 to have the wedding 157 00:03:17,461 --> 00:03:20,965 that you want. 158 00:03:20,965 --> 00:03:22,674 So if it's Canada... 159 00:03:22,674 --> 00:03:24,218 just say the word. 160 00:03:25,177 --> 00:03:27,179 And then say it again 161 00:03:25,177 --> 00:03:27,179 in French. 162 00:03:28,347 --> 00:03:30,808 See? I compromised. 163 00:03:30,808 --> 00:03:32,017 Fine. 164 00:03:32,017 --> 00:03:34,645 We'll just have a nice, 165 00:03:32,017 --> 00:03:34,645 tasteful rehearsal dinner. 166 00:03:34,645 --> 00:03:37,439 Maybe at a French restaurant. 167 00:03:37,439 --> 00:03:38,774 I know just the place. 168 00:03:38,774 --> 00:03:40,609 What's the name 169 00:03:38,774 --> 00:03:40,609 of the restaurant? 170 00:03:40,609 --> 00:03:43,779 La... ser tag. 171 00:03:44,780 --> 00:03:46,198 You know, I was thinking about 172 00:03:46,198 --> 00:03:47,992 what to get you guys 173 00:03:46,198 --> 00:03:47,992 for a wedding gift. 174 00:03:47,992 --> 00:03:49,118 As you know, 175 00:03:49,118 --> 00:03:51,954 I'm kind of 176 00:03:49,118 --> 00:03:51,954 the wedding gift master. 177 00:03:51,954 --> 00:03:53,331 And, well, 178 00:03:51,954 --> 00:03:53,331 all this talk 179 00:03:53,331 --> 00:03:54,290 of the rehearsal dinner 180 00:03:54,290 --> 00:03:56,041 gives me a fantastic idea. 181 00:03:56,041 --> 00:03:57,251 I've been 182 00:03:56,041 --> 00:03:57,251 meaning 183 00:03:57,251 --> 00:03:59,544 to start taking 184 00:03:57,251 --> 00:03:59,544 piano lessons again. 185 00:03:59,544 --> 00:04:00,587 No. 186 00:04:00,587 --> 00:04:01,672 No piano time. 187 00:04:00,587 --> 00:04:01,672 Guys! 188 00:04:01,672 --> 00:04:02,881 Just let me perform something. 189 00:04:02,881 --> 00:04:04,342 I'll-I'll tickle the keys. 190 00:04:04,342 --> 00:04:05,301 It'll be great. 191 00:04:05,301 --> 00:04:07,552 Not even if you 192 00:04:05,301 --> 00:04:07,552 dressed up as Liberace. 193 00:04:07,552 --> 00:04:09,054 What if I dressed up 194 00:04:07,552 --> 00:04:09,054 as Liberace? 195 00:04:09,054 --> 00:04:10,306 Sold! 196 00:04:09,054 --> 00:04:10,306 Sold. 197 00:04:11,640 --> 00:04:13,433 And that was the end of it. 198 00:04:13,433 --> 00:04:15,019 Until my bachelor party. 199 00:04:15,019 --> 00:04:16,228 Uh-oh. 200 00:04:16,228 --> 00:04:17,396 Let me guess: 201 00:04:17,396 --> 00:04:18,730 there was a stripper. 202 00:04:19,481 --> 00:04:21,025 You had a little fun. 203 00:04:21,025 --> 00:04:23,652 Maybe took some 204 00:04:21,025 --> 00:04:23,652 ill-advised pictures. 205 00:04:23,652 --> 00:04:24,778 Next thing 206 00:04:23,652 --> 00:04:24,778 you know, 207 00:04:24,778 --> 00:04:26,780 she's blackmailing you 208 00:04:24,778 --> 00:04:26,780 into bankruptcy, 209 00:04:26,780 --> 00:04:28,240 and your medical degree's 210 00:04:26,780 --> 00:04:28,240 hanging on the wall 211 00:04:28,240 --> 00:04:30,659 of a laser tag security office! 212 00:04:31,535 --> 00:04:33,787 No. 213 00:04:33,787 --> 00:04:35,664 The night of my bachelor party, 214 00:04:33,787 --> 00:04:35,664 my friends took me 215 00:04:35,664 --> 00:04:36,999 to a crappy hotel, 216 00:04:36,999 --> 00:04:38,834 hired my ex-fiancée 217 00:04:36,999 --> 00:04:38,834 to be the stripper, 218 00:04:38,834 --> 00:04:40,711 I lost thousands of dollars, 219 00:04:38,834 --> 00:04:40,711 and my best friend 220 00:04:40,711 --> 00:04:41,712 even had his hand cut off. 221 00:04:41,712 --> 00:04:42,713 It would've been 222 00:04:42,713 --> 00:04:43,922 the worst night of all time 223 00:04:43,922 --> 00:04:45,216 if the whole thing hadn't been 224 00:04:45,216 --> 00:04:46,258 a prank planned by 225 00:04:46,258 --> 00:04:48,219 my beautiful, amazing fiancée. 226 00:04:48,219 --> 00:04:50,721 She put me through hell 227 00:04:48,219 --> 00:04:50,721 just to give me the best 228 00:04:50,721 --> 00:04:53,098 surprise of my life... which, 229 00:04:50,721 --> 00:04:53,098 p.s., included an appearance 230 00:04:53,098 --> 00:04:54,308 by my favorite actor... 231 00:04:54,308 --> 00:04:56,352 non-porn category. 232 00:04:56,352 --> 00:04:58,562 Wow, that sounds pretty cool. 233 00:04:58,562 --> 00:05:00,439 Yeah. Except 234 00:04:58,562 --> 00:05:00,439 pretty not cool, 235 00:05:00,439 --> 00:05:02,607 because he kept talking about 236 00:05:00,439 --> 00:05:02,607 how he was gonna get me back, 237 00:05:02,607 --> 00:05:04,943 and sure enough, 238 00:05:02,607 --> 00:05:04,943 a few days later... 239 00:05:04,943 --> 00:05:08,280 Robin, there's no 240 00:05:04,943 --> 00:05:08,280 good way to say this. 241 00:05:08,280 --> 00:05:09,865 I've made a huge mistake. 242 00:05:09,865 --> 00:05:11,700 I can't go through 243 00:05:09,865 --> 00:05:11,700 with the wedding. 244 00:05:11,700 --> 00:05:13,327 What? 245 00:05:13,327 --> 00:05:14,536 I'm so sorry. 246 00:05:14,536 --> 00:05:16,330 I-I just... 247 00:05:14,536 --> 00:05:16,330 I had to tell you 248 00:05:16,330 --> 00:05:18,874 before it was too late. 249 00:05:18,874 --> 00:05:20,376 Oh, my God, you're serious. 250 00:05:20,376 --> 00:05:21,543 Yeah. 251 00:05:22,753 --> 00:05:24,046 And since this is my apartment, 252 00:05:24,046 --> 00:05:25,964 I think that 253 00:05:24,046 --> 00:05:25,964 you should move out. 254 00:05:29,468 --> 00:05:30,594 Fine. 255 00:05:32,137 --> 00:05:35,224 Puppies! 256 00:05:37,309 --> 00:05:39,311 I know. 257 00:05:37,309 --> 00:05:39,311 Great prank, right? 258 00:05:39,311 --> 00:05:40,938 That is awful. 259 00:05:40,938 --> 00:05:42,606 You're a frickin' weirdo. 260 00:05:42,606 --> 00:05:45,650 Such a weirdo. 261 00:05:45,650 --> 00:05:47,027 Careful, watch the robe. 262 00:05:47,027 --> 00:05:48,653 Anyway, 263 00:05:48,653 --> 00:05:50,655 for reasons only 264 00:05:48,653 --> 00:05:50,655 you guys and Robin 265 00:05:50,655 --> 00:05:52,699 but nobody normal 266 00:05:50,655 --> 00:05:52,699 like me would understand, 267 00:05:52,699 --> 00:05:54,118 she got cranky. 268 00:05:54,118 --> 00:05:56,078 And she laid 269 00:05:54,118 --> 00:05:56,078 down the law. 270 00:05:56,078 --> 00:05:57,455 No more surprises. 271 00:05:57,455 --> 00:05:59,164 But you love surprises. 272 00:05:59,164 --> 00:06:02,084 Almost as much as 273 00:05:59,164 --> 00:06:02,084 I love lickin' myself! 274 00:06:02,084 --> 00:06:03,961 That was me talking, 275 00:06:02,084 --> 00:06:03,961 not the puppy. 276 00:06:03,961 --> 00:06:05,337 Barney, the surprises 277 00:06:03,961 --> 00:06:05,337 are out of hand 278 00:06:05,337 --> 00:06:06,255 and they have to stop. 279 00:06:06,255 --> 00:06:07,839 Deal? 280 00:06:06,255 --> 00:06:07,839 But... 281 00:06:07,839 --> 00:06:08,882 Deal? 282 00:06:07,839 --> 00:06:08,882 But... 283 00:06:08,882 --> 00:06:10,926 Deal. 284 00:06:08,882 --> 00:06:10,926 Butt... 285 00:06:10,926 --> 00:06:11,927 Barney... 286 00:06:11,927 --> 00:06:14,012 Fine. 287 00:06:14,012 --> 00:06:15,431 Deal. 288 00:06:16,307 --> 00:06:17,433 Man. 289 00:06:17,433 --> 00:06:19,310 This whole "no more 290 00:06:17,433 --> 00:06:19,310 surprises" thing 291 00:06:19,310 --> 00:06:20,978 is so unfair. 292 00:06:20,978 --> 00:06:21,937 Who does that? 293 00:06:21,937 --> 00:06:24,273 Barney, 294 00:06:21,937 --> 00:06:24,273 the "no more surprises" thing 295 00:06:24,273 --> 00:06:26,108 is the best part 296 00:06:24,273 --> 00:06:26,108 of being married. 297 00:06:26,108 --> 00:06:27,651 It's true. 298 00:06:26,108 --> 00:06:27,651 When I wake up 299 00:06:26,108 --> 00:06:27,651 in the morning, 300 00:06:27,651 --> 00:06:30,154 I know what Lily's breath 301 00:06:27,651 --> 00:06:30,154 is gonna smell like. 302 00:06:30,154 --> 00:06:32,531 It's like... 303 00:06:30,154 --> 00:06:32,531 roses. 304 00:06:32,531 --> 00:06:33,865 Do you really 305 00:06:32,531 --> 00:06:33,865 want a marriage 306 00:06:33,865 --> 00:06:35,075 where you have 307 00:06:33,865 --> 00:06:35,075 this paranoia 308 00:06:35,075 --> 00:06:36,994 that Robin's hiding 309 00:06:35,075 --> 00:06:36,994 around every corner, 310 00:06:36,994 --> 00:06:39,455 planning to get 311 00:06:36,994 --> 00:06:39,455 you back with some 312 00:06:36,994 --> 00:06:39,455 crazy new prank? 313 00:06:39,455 --> 00:06:41,415 You're 314 00:06:39,455 --> 00:06:41,415 absolutely right. 315 00:06:41,415 --> 00:06:42,374 Thank you, Lily. 316 00:06:42,374 --> 00:06:44,460 No, th... 317 00:06:42,374 --> 00:06:44,460 that was me, 318 00:06:42,374 --> 00:06:44,460 over here. 319 00:06:44,460 --> 00:06:45,461 He wasn't listening. 320 00:06:45,461 --> 00:06:46,628 If you guys 321 00:06:45,461 --> 00:06:46,628 are saying 322 00:06:46,628 --> 00:06:47,754 what I think 323 00:06:46,628 --> 00:06:47,754 you're saying... 324 00:06:47,754 --> 00:06:48,964 Probably not. 325 00:06:47,754 --> 00:06:48,964 Go on. 326 00:06:48,964 --> 00:06:50,007 then that 327 00:06:48,964 --> 00:06:50,007 must mean... 328 00:06:50,007 --> 00:06:51,008 No, it doesn't. 329 00:06:51,008 --> 00:06:53,302 that Robin is 330 00:06:51,008 --> 00:06:53,302 planning a surprise 331 00:06:53,302 --> 00:06:55,679 laser tag 332 00:06:53,302 --> 00:06:55,679 rehearsal dinner! 333 00:07:01,059 --> 00:07:02,394 Dude, Robin is not planning 334 00:07:02,394 --> 00:07:04,396 a surprise laser tag 335 00:07:02,394 --> 00:07:04,396 rehearsal dinner. 336 00:07:04,396 --> 00:07:05,314 Yes, she is. 337 00:07:05,314 --> 00:07:07,149 No, she isn't. 338 00:07:05,314 --> 00:07:07,149 Yes, she is. 339 00:07:07,149 --> 00:07:08,775 No, I'm not! 340 00:07:08,775 --> 00:07:09,943 Yes, she is. 341 00:07:09,943 --> 00:07:11,736 No, she isn't. 342 00:07:11,736 --> 00:07:13,405 Then why did 343 00:07:11,736 --> 00:07:13,405 she pretend 344 00:07:13,405 --> 00:07:15,491 to ridicule it 345 00:07:13,405 --> 00:07:15,491 as an idiotic idea? 346 00:07:15,491 --> 00:07:18,702 Because it is 347 00:07:15,491 --> 00:07:18,702 an idiotic idea. 348 00:07:18,702 --> 00:07:20,496 If Robin 349 00:07:18,702 --> 00:07:20,496 actually was 350 00:07:20,496 --> 00:07:21,955 planning a surprise, 351 00:07:21,955 --> 00:07:24,082 don't you think she would 352 00:07:21,955 --> 00:07:24,082 tell her maid of honor? 353 00:07:24,082 --> 00:07:25,917 She didn't tell you 354 00:07:24,082 --> 00:07:25,917 'cause you can keep a secret 355 00:07:25,917 --> 00:07:27,752 the way my dentist 356 00:07:25,917 --> 00:07:27,752 keeps his car keys. 357 00:07:29,254 --> 00:07:32,550 You don't know him, 358 00:07:29,254 --> 00:07:32,550 but he's lost them... 359 00:07:32,550 --> 00:07:33,675 like, twice. 360 00:07:33,675 --> 00:07:34,885 Actually, 361 00:07:33,675 --> 00:07:34,885 just once, and... 362 00:07:34,885 --> 00:07:37,012 that time they were 363 00:07:34,885 --> 00:07:37,012 in his other pocket. 364 00:07:37,012 --> 00:07:39,181 I can't keep a secret? 365 00:07:39,181 --> 00:07:40,516 He does have a point, Lily. 366 00:07:40,516 --> 00:07:42,226 You're kind of famous for 367 00:07:40,516 --> 00:07:42,226 the old blabbity-blabbity. 368 00:07:42,226 --> 00:07:43,310 Hey. 369 00:07:43,310 --> 00:07:44,603 How was lunch 370 00:07:43,310 --> 00:07:44,603 with Debbie? 371 00:07:44,603 --> 00:07:46,230 Great. 372 00:07:44,603 --> 00:07:46,230 She's pregnant! 373 00:07:46,230 --> 00:07:47,231 Oops. 374 00:07:47,231 --> 00:07:49,107 I'm not supposed 375 00:07:47,231 --> 00:07:49,107 to tell anybody. 376 00:07:47,231 --> 00:07:49,107 Why not? 377 00:07:49,107 --> 00:07:50,775 Because she's getting 378 00:07:49,107 --> 00:07:50,775 a divorce. 379 00:07:50,775 --> 00:07:51,902 Damn it! 380 00:07:51,902 --> 00:07:53,070 Debbie's getting 381 00:07:51,902 --> 00:07:53,070 a divorce? 382 00:07:53,070 --> 00:07:55,822 Yeah, she walked 383 00:07:53,070 --> 00:07:55,822 in on her husband 384 00:07:53,070 --> 00:07:55,822 having sex. 385 00:07:55,822 --> 00:07:56,990 Oh! Come on, Lily. 386 00:07:56,990 --> 00:07:58,783 Well, maybe we don't 387 00:07:56,990 --> 00:07:58,783 need to know every gory... 388 00:07:58,783 --> 00:07:59,868 With a man. 389 00:07:59,868 --> 00:08:02,704 Will you get it 390 00:07:59,868 --> 00:08:02,704 together, Aldrin? 391 00:08:02,704 --> 00:08:03,872 You okay, Lily? 392 00:08:03,872 --> 00:08:06,584 And that guy's 393 00:08:03,872 --> 00:08:06,584 the father of the baby. 394 00:08:06,584 --> 00:08:09,669 I gotta go lie down. 395 00:08:09,669 --> 00:08:11,963 Which brings us 396 00:08:09,669 --> 00:08:11,963 to earlier today, 397 00:08:11,963 --> 00:08:14,966 when Robin was setting up 398 00:08:11,963 --> 00:08:14,966 the decoy rehearsal dinner, 399 00:08:14,966 --> 00:08:16,801 complete with fake booze. 400 00:08:18,303 --> 00:08:20,347 Trying to pass 401 00:08:18,303 --> 00:08:20,347 this off as Scotch, 402 00:08:20,347 --> 00:08:22,600 and we all know 403 00:08:20,347 --> 00:08:22,600 it's apple juice. 404 00:08:28,480 --> 00:08:31,066 Typical apple juice burn. 405 00:08:32,067 --> 00:08:34,278 Yes, Barney, 406 00:08:32,067 --> 00:08:34,278 the booze is real. 407 00:08:34,278 --> 00:08:35,529 The food is real. 408 00:08:35,529 --> 00:08:37,906 Ooh, speaking of which, 409 00:08:35,529 --> 00:08:37,906 where are the 410 00:08:35,529 --> 00:08:37,906 bacon-wrapped figs? 411 00:08:37,906 --> 00:08:39,699 Probably at... 412 00:08:39,699 --> 00:08:40,951 the laser tag place, 413 00:08:40,951 --> 00:08:43,287 where the real rehearsal 414 00:08:40,951 --> 00:08:43,287 dinner's going down. 415 00:08:43,287 --> 00:08:46,415 Isn't that right, 416 00:08:43,287 --> 00:08:46,415 Theodore? 417 00:08:46,415 --> 00:08:48,875 Barney, there is 418 00:08:46,415 --> 00:08:48,875 no laser tag. 419 00:08:48,875 --> 00:08:50,085 We're gonna have 420 00:08:48,875 --> 00:08:50,085 a nice dinner, 421 00:08:50,085 --> 00:08:51,503 some drinks, 422 00:08:50,085 --> 00:08:51,503 and then, 423 00:08:51,503 --> 00:08:52,504 according to Robin, 424 00:08:52,504 --> 00:08:54,047 if her Aunt Edith 425 00:08:52,504 --> 00:08:54,047 gets drunk enough, 426 00:08:54,047 --> 00:08:55,799 she'll take off her wig and 427 00:08:54,047 --> 00:08:55,799 they'll play hockey with it. 428 00:08:55,799 --> 00:08:56,925 Poppycock! 429 00:08:56,925 --> 00:08:59,010 You know how 430 00:08:56,925 --> 00:08:59,010 she's gonna do it, 431 00:08:59,010 --> 00:09:00,095 and you're gonna 432 00:08:59,010 --> 00:09:00,095 tell me! 433 00:09:00,095 --> 00:09:03,265 Or do I have 434 00:09:00,095 --> 00:09:03,265 to get my face 435 00:09:03,265 --> 00:09:06,644 even closer 436 00:09:03,265 --> 00:09:06,644 to yours? 437 00:09:06,644 --> 00:09:07,645 Hey. 438 00:09:07,645 --> 00:09:08,937 How come you're 439 00:09:07,645 --> 00:09:08,937 not getting 440 00:09:08,937 --> 00:09:10,481 uncomfortably 441 00:09:08,937 --> 00:09:10,481 close to my face? 442 00:09:10,481 --> 00:09:12,983 I could be in on it, too. 443 00:09:14,693 --> 00:09:15,819 'Course you could, 444 00:09:14,693 --> 00:09:15,819 Lil. 445 00:09:15,819 --> 00:09:17,446 I can keep a secret. 446 00:09:17,446 --> 00:09:18,863 Lily, don't 447 00:09:17,446 --> 00:09:18,863 make me laugh. 448 00:09:18,863 --> 00:09:20,240 I'd trust you 449 00:09:18,863 --> 00:09:20,240 with a secret 450 00:09:20,240 --> 00:09:22,200 as much as I'd trust 451 00:09:20,240 --> 00:09:22,200 Marshall with Pop Secret. 452 00:09:22,200 --> 00:09:24,286 I can keep a secret! 453 00:09:24,286 --> 00:09:26,413 I can keep a secret 454 00:09:24,286 --> 00:09:26,413 real good. 455 00:09:26,413 --> 00:09:28,748 I can keep a secret 456 00:09:26,413 --> 00:09:28,748 like nobody's business, 457 00:09:28,748 --> 00:09:31,710 'cause it is 458 00:09:28,748 --> 00:09:31,710 nobody's business. 459 00:09:31,710 --> 00:09:32,961 'Cause it's a secret, 460 00:09:32,961 --> 00:09:34,672 and I'm keeping it! 461 00:09:34,672 --> 00:09:35,673 Does Marshall 462 00:09:34,672 --> 00:09:35,673 shave his back? 463 00:09:35,673 --> 00:09:37,675 No, I shave it 464 00:09:35,673 --> 00:09:37,675 for him. Damn it! 465 00:09:37,675 --> 00:09:38,676 Ooh! 466 00:09:38,676 --> 00:09:40,051 I should call 467 00:09:38,676 --> 00:09:40,051 Marshall. 468 00:09:40,051 --> 00:09:41,595 I bet he's 469 00:09:40,051 --> 00:09:41,595 in on this. 470 00:09:41,595 --> 00:09:43,639 If he really exists. 471 00:09:44,848 --> 00:09:46,350 Okay. 472 00:09:46,350 --> 00:09:47,643 Setting aside the fact 473 00:09:47,643 --> 00:09:48,893 that I've kept your whole 474 00:09:48,893 --> 00:09:51,104 "moving to Chicago" thing 475 00:09:48,893 --> 00:09:51,104 a secret, 476 00:09:51,104 --> 00:09:54,024 aren't you supposed to be 477 00:09:51,104 --> 00:09:54,024 dressed like Liberace right now? 478 00:09:54,024 --> 00:09:55,567 Okay, first of all, 479 00:09:55,567 --> 00:09:57,235 if I showed up in costume, 480 00:09:57,235 --> 00:09:58,987 it would steal from 481 00:09:57,235 --> 00:09:58,987 the surprise and spectacle 482 00:09:58,987 --> 00:10:00,405 of my grand entrance. 483 00:10:00,405 --> 00:10:02,199 And second of all, 484 00:10:00,405 --> 00:10:02,199 I'm not doing that. 485 00:10:02,199 --> 00:10:03,325 Why not? 486 00:10:03,325 --> 00:10:06,704 Because dressing like Liberace 487 00:10:03,325 --> 00:10:06,704 is easy, but... 488 00:10:06,704 --> 00:10:10,374 Uh, yes, 4/4, E-sharp... 489 00:10:10,374 --> 00:10:13,711 major... 490 00:10:13,711 --> 00:10:15,420 Okay. 491 00:10:15,420 --> 00:10:18,965 Let's make something 492 00:10:15,420 --> 00:10:18,965 beautiful, shall we? 493 00:10:21,343 --> 00:10:23,345 I think that's 494 00:10:21,343 --> 00:10:23,345 enough for today. 495 00:10:24,763 --> 00:10:27,558 Okay, I figured out how 496 00:10:24,763 --> 00:10:27,558 this is gonna go down. 497 00:10:27,558 --> 00:10:29,934 We're gonna "run out" of ice, 498 00:10:29,934 --> 00:10:31,853 and Robin's gonna ask me 499 00:10:29,934 --> 00:10:31,853 to go get some, 500 00:10:31,853 --> 00:10:34,481 and lo and behold, 501 00:10:31,853 --> 00:10:34,481 the only place that sells ice 502 00:10:34,481 --> 00:10:38,527 in this whole town is right next 503 00:10:34,481 --> 00:10:38,527 to the local laser taggery. 504 00:10:38,527 --> 00:10:40,195 I go inside and... 505 00:10:40,195 --> 00:10:41,321 Surprise! 506 00:10:41,321 --> 00:10:43,657 Beautiful dinner, 507 00:10:41,321 --> 00:10:43,657 family and friends, 508 00:10:43,657 --> 00:10:46,201 free game tokens 509 00:10:43,657 --> 00:10:46,201 and an off-road arcade game 510 00:10:46,201 --> 00:10:48,245 that's rigged 511 00:10:46,201 --> 00:10:48,245 for unlimited turbos! 512 00:10:48,245 --> 00:10:50,121 That is the 513 00:10:48,245 --> 00:10:50,121 single stupidest... 514 00:10:50,121 --> 00:10:51,540 Guys, you aren't 515 00:10:50,121 --> 00:10:51,540 gonna believe this. 516 00:10:51,540 --> 00:10:53,751 The ice machine 517 00:10:51,540 --> 00:10:53,751 is broken. 518 00:10:54,376 --> 00:10:55,711 Is it now? 519 00:10:55,711 --> 00:10:59,548 Well, dog my cats, 520 00:10:55,711 --> 00:10:59,548 what are the chances? 521 00:10:59,548 --> 00:11:02,008 Huh? What do we do? 522 00:11:02,008 --> 00:11:04,720 Well, I guess I could go get 523 00:11:02,008 --> 00:11:04,720 some ice. 524 00:11:04,720 --> 00:11:05,804 Uh, no, 525 00:11:04,720 --> 00:11:05,804 they'll send someone. 526 00:11:05,804 --> 00:11:07,431 All right, fine. 527 00:11:05,804 --> 00:11:07,431 Twist my arm. I'll do it. 528 00:11:07,431 --> 00:11:08,515 But seriously, 529 00:11:07,431 --> 00:11:08,515 Hmm? 530 00:11:08,515 --> 00:11:10,517 did you get everything set up 531 00:11:08,515 --> 00:11:10,517 over there? 532 00:11:10,517 --> 00:11:12,143 Do you have enough food, 533 00:11:10,517 --> 00:11:12,143 have enough guns? 534 00:11:12,143 --> 00:11:14,730 Did you get a vest extender 535 00:11:12,143 --> 00:11:14,730 for Grandma Stinson? She's... 536 00:11:14,730 --> 00:11:17,190 What are you 537 00:11:14,730 --> 00:11:17,190 talking about? 538 00:11:17,190 --> 00:11:21,319 Oh, babe, you're so good 539 00:11:17,190 --> 00:11:21,319 at this. I love it. 540 00:11:21,319 --> 00:11:23,238 All right, I'll see you guys 541 00:11:21,319 --> 00:11:23,238 over there. 542 00:11:23,238 --> 00:11:24,740 I mean, be right back. 543 00:11:24,740 --> 00:11:28,577 Barney, Barney, this is 544 00:11:24,740 --> 00:11:28,577 our rehearsal dinner, okay? 545 00:11:28,577 --> 00:11:30,287 Do not leave the premises. 546 00:11:30,287 --> 00:11:32,080 Promise me you're not going 547 00:11:30,287 --> 00:11:32,080 anywhere. 548 00:11:32,080 --> 00:11:33,164 Fine. 549 00:11:33,164 --> 00:11:34,124 Say it. 550 00:11:34,124 --> 00:11:36,501 Say you promise 551 00:11:34,124 --> 00:11:36,501 you won't leave. 552 00:11:36,501 --> 00:11:39,838 I promise I won't leave. 553 00:11:39,838 --> 00:11:42,006 So I left. 554 00:11:39,838 --> 00:11:42,006 And what do you know, 555 00:11:42,006 --> 00:11:46,052 the ice store is right next 556 00:11:42,006 --> 00:11:46,052 to a laser tag place! 557 00:11:46,052 --> 00:11:48,472 No, it isn't! 558 00:11:46,052 --> 00:11:48,472 It's six miles away 559 00:11:48,472 --> 00:11:49,681 in the opposite direction. 560 00:11:49,681 --> 00:11:51,516 And I told you not to go! 561 00:11:51,516 --> 00:11:52,726 Yeah, well, you also told me 562 00:11:52,726 --> 00:11:54,645 you didn't want a ring bear 563 00:11:52,726 --> 00:11:54,645 at the wedding. 564 00:11:54,645 --> 00:11:55,646 Ring bear-er! 565 00:11:55,646 --> 00:11:56,688 We all know how great 566 00:11:56,688 --> 00:11:57,815 that's gonna be. The point is, 567 00:11:57,815 --> 00:11:59,190 I played along with her plan, 568 00:11:59,190 --> 00:12:02,820 and I acted "natural" so I 569 00:11:59,190 --> 00:12:02,820 wouldn't spoil the surprise. 570 00:12:02,820 --> 00:12:05,614 Oh, my goodness! 571 00:12:05,614 --> 00:12:07,365 Laser tag? 572 00:12:07,365 --> 00:12:09,493 Maybe I should go in here 573 00:12:07,365 --> 00:12:09,493 for a minute, 574 00:12:09,493 --> 00:12:11,286 just check it out 575 00:12:09,493 --> 00:12:11,286 for no apparent reason. 576 00:12:11,286 --> 00:12:12,830 And what's this? 577 00:12:12,830 --> 00:12:15,332 My hands-free token satchel? 578 00:12:15,332 --> 00:12:17,876 And my free lifetime refill 579 00:12:15,332 --> 00:12:17,876 root beer mug? 580 00:12:20,044 --> 00:12:22,046 So for the past 581 00:12:20,044 --> 00:12:22,046 two months 582 00:12:22,046 --> 00:12:24,090 when we were letting you use 583 00:12:22,046 --> 00:12:24,090 our apartment 584 00:12:24,090 --> 00:12:26,009 to practice the piano 585 00:12:24,090 --> 00:12:26,009 every Sunday night, 586 00:12:26,009 --> 00:12:27,427 what were you doing? 587 00:12:27,427 --> 00:12:31,598 Oh, so that's not traveling 588 00:12:27,427 --> 00:12:31,598 'cause he's the MVP? 589 00:12:31,598 --> 00:12:34,351 Come on! 590 00:12:34,351 --> 00:12:36,978 Where's Barney? 591 00:12:34,351 --> 00:12:36,978 Has anyone seen him? 592 00:12:36,978 --> 00:12:38,313 Robin, Ted's totally bailing 593 00:12:38,313 --> 00:12:40,315 on playing the piano 594 00:12:38,313 --> 00:12:40,315 for you and Barney. 595 00:12:40,315 --> 00:12:43,985 Oh, really? Ted, you didn't 596 00:12:40,315 --> 00:12:43,985 have to not do that. 597 00:12:43,985 --> 00:12:44,944 But thank you. 598 00:12:44,944 --> 00:12:47,739 But he promised! 599 00:12:44,944 --> 00:12:47,739 A promise is a promise. 600 00:12:47,739 --> 00:12:49,491 You can't say you're 601 00:12:47,739 --> 00:12:49,491 gonna do something 602 00:12:49,491 --> 00:12:52,202 and then suddenly do something 603 00:12:49,491 --> 00:12:52,202 completely different! 604 00:12:52,202 --> 00:12:54,037 Why are you getting 605 00:12:52,202 --> 00:12:54,037 so worked up about this? 606 00:12:54,037 --> 00:12:57,833 Because, obviously, I'm worked 607 00:12:54,037 --> 00:12:57,833 up for a different 608 00:12:57,833 --> 00:12:58,834 but somewhat similar reason. 609 00:12:58,834 --> 00:13:00,502 And someone should ask me 610 00:12:58,834 --> 00:13:00,502 about it! 611 00:13:00,502 --> 00:13:03,254 I'm sorry. I don't have time 612 00:13:00,502 --> 00:13:03,254 for your drama right now, Lily. 613 00:13:03,254 --> 00:13:04,464 My fiancé is missing. 614 00:13:04,464 --> 00:13:06,341 Marshall got picked 615 00:13:04,464 --> 00:13:06,341 to be a judge. 616 00:13:06,341 --> 00:13:08,510 He took the job 617 00:13:06,341 --> 00:13:08,510 without even asking me. 618 00:13:09,219 --> 00:13:11,012 Italy's off! 619 00:13:12,180 --> 00:13:15,851 I have time for your drama. 620 00:13:22,607 --> 00:13:26,027 So, Marshall can't go 621 00:13:22,607 --> 00:13:26,027 to Italy? 622 00:13:22,607 --> 00:13:26,027 Not if he wants to be a judge. 623 00:13:26,027 --> 00:13:28,405 And my Italian was getting 624 00:13:26,027 --> 00:13:28,405 so good. 625 00:13:28,405 --> 00:13:31,241 It was so. 626 00:13:34,661 --> 00:13:36,955 But wait, you guys already 627 00:13:34,661 --> 00:13:36,955 sublet the apartment. 628 00:13:36,955 --> 00:13:38,790 You're already packed. 629 00:13:38,790 --> 00:13:41,543 Marshall already borrowed 630 00:13:38,790 --> 00:13:41,543 and lost my Rosetta Stone. 631 00:13:41,543 --> 00:13:43,211 That selfish bastard! 632 00:13:43,211 --> 00:13:45,547 Sorry, Lil. Hello. 633 00:13:45,547 --> 00:13:47,298 Okay, I'm mad, too. 634 00:13:47,298 --> 00:13:48,800 I should hope so. 635 00:13:48,800 --> 00:13:51,302 All of a sudden, his dream 636 00:13:48,800 --> 00:13:51,302 is more important than yours? 637 00:13:51,302 --> 00:13:52,930 And he did it behind your back. 638 00:13:52,930 --> 00:13:54,138 Bastardo! 639 00:13:54,138 --> 00:13:55,933 He would never hurt me 640 00:13:54,138 --> 00:13:55,933 intentionally. 641 00:13:55,933 --> 00:13:57,642 I'll hurt him intentionally. 642 00:13:57,642 --> 00:13:58,977 Molto bastardo! 643 00:13:58,977 --> 00:14:00,228 That's sweet of you to say. 644 00:14:00,228 --> 00:14:02,355 You could never take 645 00:14:00,228 --> 00:14:02,355 Marshall in a million years, 646 00:14:02,355 --> 00:14:04,274 but that's sweet of you to say. 647 00:14:04,274 --> 00:14:08,236 Well, apparently, Barney went 648 00:14:04,274 --> 00:14:08,236 to the laser tag place 649 00:14:08,236 --> 00:14:10,906 looking for a surprise 650 00:14:08,236 --> 00:14:10,906 rehearsal dinner. 651 00:14:10,906 --> 00:14:13,241 When he didn't find one, 652 00:14:10,906 --> 00:14:13,241 he threatened 653 00:14:13,241 --> 00:14:14,868 to dunk 654 00:14:13,241 --> 00:14:14,868 the snack bar guy's head 655 00:14:14,868 --> 00:14:18,496 into a vat 656 00:14:14,868 --> 00:14:18,496 of scalding nacho Whiz. 657 00:14:18,496 --> 00:14:20,206 He's being held 658 00:14:18,496 --> 00:14:20,206 until the police arrive 659 00:14:20,206 --> 00:14:23,084 I need your apple juice. 660 00:14:24,085 --> 00:14:26,838 Ha! 661 00:14:26,838 --> 00:14:28,089 And here we are. 662 00:14:28,089 --> 00:14:32,051 Now, I believe this charade 663 00:14:28,089 --> 00:14:32,051 has gone on long enough. 664 00:14:32,051 --> 00:14:35,722 Can we please get to the 665 00:14:32,051 --> 00:14:35,722 surprise laser tag rehearsal? 666 00:14:35,722 --> 00:14:38,308 Hey, there is no surprise 667 00:14:35,722 --> 00:14:38,308 laser tag rehearsal dinner! 668 00:14:38,308 --> 00:14:42,270 Okay, but if I may offer 669 00:14:38,308 --> 00:14:42,270 an opposing view. 670 00:14:42,270 --> 00:14:43,855 Of course there is! 671 00:14:43,855 --> 00:14:46,065 This place is lousy 672 00:14:43,855 --> 00:14:46,065 with clues. 673 00:14:46,065 --> 00:14:49,527 Is he even really 674 00:14:46,065 --> 00:14:49,527 a security guard? 675 00:14:49,527 --> 00:14:52,196 Because he looks an awful lot 676 00:14:49,527 --> 00:14:52,196 like a non-Pakistani version 677 00:14:52,196 --> 00:14:55,199 of the guy who delivers 678 00:14:52,196 --> 00:14:55,199 sandwiches at my office. 679 00:14:55,199 --> 00:14:56,994 Also... 680 00:14:56,994 --> 00:15:03,750 "laser tag" has the same number 681 00:14:56,994 --> 00:15:03,750 of letters as "rehearsal." 682 00:15:03,750 --> 00:15:07,004 Laser tag has eight, 683 00:15:03,750 --> 00:15:07,004 rehearsal has nine. 684 00:15:07,004 --> 00:15:11,549 And if you rearrange the letters 685 00:15:07,004 --> 00:15:11,549 and add some other ones, 686 00:15:11,549 --> 00:15:15,846 it says, "Get ready, Barney, 687 00:15:11,549 --> 00:15:15,846 for the biggest surprise ever, 688 00:15:15,846 --> 00:15:18,222 you handsome son of a..." 689 00:15:18,222 --> 00:15:20,642 and then not quite enough 690 00:15:18,222 --> 00:15:20,642 letters for "bitch," 691 00:15:20,642 --> 00:15:21,685 but good try, Robin. 692 00:15:21,685 --> 00:15:23,979 This is crazy, Barney. 693 00:15:23,979 --> 00:15:26,147 We-We can't have a marriage 694 00:15:23,979 --> 00:15:26,147 like this. 695 00:15:26,147 --> 00:15:30,151 A marriage has to be built on 696 00:15:26,147 --> 00:15:30,151 honesty and trust 697 00:15:30,151 --> 00:15:32,529 and all of that Lily- 698 00:15:30,151 --> 00:15:32,529 and-Marshall crap. 699 00:15:32,529 --> 00:15:35,907 I though our marriage was built 700 00:15:32,529 --> 00:15:35,907 on honesty and trust 701 00:15:35,907 --> 00:15:39,369 and all that Lily- 702 00:15:35,907 --> 00:15:39,369 and-Marshal crap. 703 00:15:39,369 --> 00:15:42,080 I just feel so alone right now. 704 00:15:42,080 --> 00:15:44,666 Well, you're not. I'm here. 705 00:15:45,792 --> 00:15:48,252 And I know you can keep 706 00:15:45,792 --> 00:15:48,252 a secret. 707 00:15:48,252 --> 00:15:50,254 Yeah, right. 708 00:15:50,254 --> 00:15:51,506 Tell you what. 709 00:15:51,506 --> 00:15:54,175 How about I let you in 710 00:15:51,506 --> 00:15:54,175 on another secret? 711 00:15:54,175 --> 00:15:56,094 Something bigger. 712 00:15:56,094 --> 00:15:58,096 Bigger than Chicago? 713 00:15:59,764 --> 00:16:02,600 Are you kidding? 714 00:16:02,600 --> 00:16:05,562 Nope. Want to do the honors? 715 00:16:09,190 --> 00:16:10,984 Ladies and gentlemen, 716 00:16:10,984 --> 00:16:14,320 there's been a slight change 717 00:16:10,984 --> 00:16:14,320 of plan. 718 00:16:14,320 --> 00:16:16,280 Fine! Fine. 719 00:16:16,280 --> 00:16:17,699 You're right, Robin. 720 00:16:17,699 --> 00:16:20,535 Marriage isn't about playing 721 00:16:17,699 --> 00:16:20,535 crazy pranks. 722 00:16:20,535 --> 00:16:23,663 It isn't about telling 723 00:16:20,535 --> 00:16:23,663 long expertly crafted lies 724 00:16:23,663 --> 00:16:24,789 to cover those pranks... 725 00:16:24,789 --> 00:16:26,583 How'd you get out 726 00:16:24,789 --> 00:16:26,583 of those handcuffs? 727 00:16:26,583 --> 00:16:28,752 and hiring actors 728 00:16:26,583 --> 00:16:28,752 to play security guards 729 00:16:28,752 --> 00:16:31,295 and spending exorbitant 730 00:16:28,752 --> 00:16:31,295 amounts of money on things 731 00:16:31,295 --> 00:16:33,423 like giant, 732 00:16:31,295 --> 00:16:33,423 fake laser tag signs. 733 00:16:33,423 --> 00:16:35,216 No, it's about honesty. 734 00:16:35,216 --> 00:16:37,135 Size six skate, right? 735 00:16:37,135 --> 00:16:38,136 Yeah. 736 00:16:38,136 --> 00:16:41,765 And in that spirit, 737 00:16:38,136 --> 00:16:41,765 I got to be honest. 738 00:16:41,765 --> 00:16:44,308 Every now and then, 739 00:16:44,308 --> 00:16:48,563 I am gonna lie to you. 740 00:16:44,308 --> 00:16:48,563 I just am. 741 00:16:48,563 --> 00:16:51,858 If it's in the interest 742 00:16:48,563 --> 00:16:51,858 of an amazing surprise, that is. 743 00:16:51,858 --> 00:16:56,154 You're gonna get bamboozled, 744 00:16:51,858 --> 00:16:56,154 hoodwinked. 745 00:16:56,154 --> 00:16:58,615 Heck, I'll just say it. 746 00:16:58,615 --> 00:17:01,284 You're gonna get snowed. 747 00:17:03,453 --> 00:17:04,955 Why is it snowing in here? 748 00:17:04,955 --> 00:17:06,081 Put on the skates. 749 00:17:06,081 --> 00:17:07,498 We gotta go. 750 00:17:07,498 --> 00:17:09,292 Where? 751 00:17:09,292 --> 00:17:11,544 Where are we going? 752 00:17:11,544 --> 00:17:14,631 To the rehearsal dinner, silly. 753 00:17:14,631 --> 00:17:17,175 Let's get this party started. 754 00:17:20,053 --> 00:17:22,180 What? 755 00:17:22,180 --> 00:17:24,099 Surprise! 756 00:17:24,891 --> 00:17:27,435 What-What is going on? 757 00:17:27,435 --> 00:17:31,856 I know how much you wanted 758 00:17:27,435 --> 00:17:31,856 to be in Canada this weekend. 759 00:17:31,856 --> 00:17:33,775 So I brought Canada to you. 760 00:17:33,775 --> 00:17:37,236 Oh, and here's an autographed 761 00:17:33,775 --> 00:17:37,236 picture of Wayne Gretzky. 762 00:17:37,236 --> 00:17:38,571 Thanks. 763 00:17:38,571 --> 00:17:41,699 And this guy's not really 764 00:17:38,571 --> 00:17:41,699 a security guard. 765 00:18:11,562 --> 00:18:13,690 Thanks for letting me 766 00:18:11,562 --> 00:18:13,690 in on this. 767 00:18:13,690 --> 00:18:15,692 Even if it was 768 00:18:13,690 --> 00:18:15,692 at the very end. 769 00:18:15,692 --> 00:18:16,860 My pleasure. 770 00:18:16,860 --> 00:18:18,361 Oh, and by the way, 771 00:18:18,361 --> 00:18:20,321 there's one more secret 772 00:18:18,361 --> 00:18:20,321 I've been keeping. 773 00:18:20,321 --> 00:18:21,865 All those nights 774 00:18:20,321 --> 00:18:21,865 I was supposed 775 00:18:21,865 --> 00:18:23,241 to be taking piano lessons? 776 00:18:23,241 --> 00:18:27,996 I was actually taking 777 00:18:23,241 --> 00:18:27,996 figure skating lessons! 778 00:18:32,375 --> 00:18:34,377 Kids, it takes more 779 00:18:32,375 --> 00:18:34,377 than two months 780 00:18:34,377 --> 00:18:36,880 to learn how to figure skate. 781 00:18:38,798 --> 00:18:40,299 I love you. 782 00:18:40,299 --> 00:18:42,343 I love you, too. 783 00:18:42,343 --> 00:18:44,846 I'm gonna get you back, 784 00:18:42,343 --> 00:18:44,846 you know? 785 00:18:42,343 --> 00:18:44,846 Bring it. 786 00:18:59,736 --> 00:19:01,779 I can't believe 787 00:18:59,736 --> 00:19:01,779 you did all of this. 788 00:19:01,779 --> 00:19:03,614 Hey, I thought you 789 00:19:01,779 --> 00:19:03,614 didn't like Canada. 790 00:19:03,614 --> 00:19:05,575 Are you kidding? 791 00:19:03,614 --> 00:19:05,575 I love Canada. 792 00:19:05,575 --> 00:19:06,993 Holy musk ox, 793 00:19:06,993 --> 00:19:09,787 is that legendary 794 00:19:06,993 --> 00:19:09,787 Canadian doctor 795 00:19:06,993 --> 00:19:09,787 Frederick Banting? 796 00:19:09,787 --> 00:19:10,872 Whoa! 797 00:19:10,872 --> 00:19:13,208 In 1924, 798 00:19:10,872 --> 00:19:13,208 I discovered insulin. 799 00:19:13,208 --> 00:19:15,085 Take that, diabetes. 800 00:19:15,085 --> 00:19:18,213 Hey, look, it's Manitoba's 801 00:19:15,085 --> 00:19:18,213 native son, Norman Breakey. 802 00:19:18,213 --> 00:19:19,297 You're welcome, world. 803 00:19:19,297 --> 00:19:22,466 Enjoy my invention, 804 00:19:19,297 --> 00:19:22,466 the paint roller. 805 00:19:22,466 --> 00:19:25,303 And of course, 806 00:19:22,466 --> 00:19:25,303 you know Alan Thicke. 807 00:19:25,303 --> 00:19:26,971 Hey, hey, you... 808 00:19:25,303 --> 00:19:26,971 Oh, hey. 809 00:19:26,971 --> 00:19:28,848 are the prettiest girl 810 00:19:26,971 --> 00:19:28,848 in the place. 811 00:19:28,848 --> 00:19:29,974 Oh, thank you, 812 00:19:28,848 --> 00:19:29,974 Alan. 813 00:19:29,974 --> 00:19:31,517 All right, all right, 814 00:19:29,974 --> 00:19:31,517 all right. 815 00:19:31,517 --> 00:19:32,643 Good to see you. 816 00:19:32,643 --> 00:19:33,978 Hey, look, 817 00:19:32,643 --> 00:19:33,978 it's Louise Poirier, 818 00:19:33,978 --> 00:19:35,646 who I think worked 819 00:19:33,978 --> 00:19:35,646 for the company 820 00:19:35,646 --> 00:19:37,107 that probably created 821 00:19:35,646 --> 00:19:37,107 Wonderbra. 822 00:19:39,400 --> 00:19:40,818 Okay, okay. 823 00:19:40,818 --> 00:19:44,447 Canadians also helped 824 00:19:40,818 --> 00:19:44,447 win two world wars... 825 00:19:40,818 --> 00:19:44,447 Mm-hmm. 826 00:19:44,447 --> 00:19:46,241 and gave the world 827 00:19:44,447 --> 00:19:46,241 Neil Young, William Shatner, 828 00:19:46,241 --> 00:19:47,909 Leonard Cohen, 829 00:19:46,241 --> 00:19:47,909 Pamela Anderson, 830 00:19:47,909 --> 00:19:49,410 one quarter 831 00:19:47,909 --> 00:19:49,410 of Barney Stinson, 832 00:19:49,410 --> 00:19:53,248 instant mashed potatoes, 833 00:19:49,410 --> 00:19:53,248 and best of all, you. 834 00:19:53,248 --> 00:19:55,499 Thank you.