1 00:00:02,162 --> 00:00:03,497 Well, then, what would you say? 2 00:00:03,580 --> 00:00:04,623 She's a quitter. 3 00:00:04,706 --> 00:00:06,291 You know what? I don't even care! 4 00:00:06,375 --> 00:00:08,502 That proves my point. Because you don't care, 5 00:00:08,585 --> 00:00:09,586 you never succeed. 6 00:00:09,670 --> 00:00:11,129 Right. Failed. 7 00:00:11,213 --> 00:00:14,091 Failure implies that she actually tried to be an actor. 8 00:00:14,174 --> 00:00:16,510 I did try. It just didn't happen to work out. 9 00:00:16,593 --> 00:00:19,096 It's not your fault, sweetie. You're just not pretty enough. 10 00:00:19,179 --> 00:00:20,472 Oh, thank you! 11 00:00:20,555 --> 00:00:21,848 That's my dad, everybody! 12 00:00:21,932 --> 00:00:23,308 - Great. - Okay. Okay, okay, 13 00:00:23,392 --> 00:00:26,687 I just killed three very large rats that were stuck in glue traps. 14 00:00:26,770 --> 00:00:28,772 - Good work. - No. No, no, that's not good. 15 00:00:28,855 --> 00:00:31,983 I am done with rat detail. That's by far the worst job in the bar! 16 00:00:32,067 --> 00:00:33,318 That's why we call it "Charlie work." 17 00:00:33,402 --> 00:00:34,861 No, dude. Not Charlie work. 18 00:00:34,945 --> 00:00:36,822 There's an emotional toll that comes out of this. 19 00:00:36,905 --> 00:00:38,448 I mean, you kill one of those… 20 00:00:38,532 --> 00:00:40,951 - Are you kidding me? - What? What? 21 00:00:41,034 --> 00:00:43,328 You're blowing smoke directly in my face when I'm trying to talk to you. 22 00:00:43,412 --> 00:00:45,122 - What is he talking about? - You know what, if you want to smoke, 23 00:00:45,205 --> 00:00:46,331 you should have to take it outside. 24 00:00:46,415 --> 00:00:47,416 That's it. I'm done with this. 25 00:00:47,499 --> 00:00:49,334 - It's a bar. - Yeah. It's a bar, dude. 26 00:00:49,418 --> 00:00:50,669 But you know what, Charlie, I think you're right. 27 00:00:50,752 --> 00:00:52,170 I think maybe we should ban smoking in here. 28 00:00:52,254 --> 00:00:53,839 - What are you talking about? - Come on. 29 00:00:53,922 --> 00:00:56,174 - That's completely ridiculous. - How is that ridiculous? 30 00:00:56,258 --> 00:00:57,968 There are smoking bans in a lot of states now. 31 00:00:58,051 --> 00:01:00,053 Uh, yes. And it's completely un-American. 32 00:01:00,137 --> 00:01:02,139 If you don't like smoke, then don't come into the bar. 33 00:01:02,222 --> 00:01:04,266 I work in this bar. I work here. 34 00:01:04,349 --> 00:01:06,601 But that's because you have the freedom to choose to work here, okay. 35 00:01:06,685 --> 00:01:08,437 Smoking bans, they don't protect freedom. 36 00:01:08,520 --> 00:01:10,022 They strip 'em away from smokers. 37 00:01:10,105 --> 00:01:12,482 Look, I didn't go to Vietnam 38 00:01:12,566 --> 00:01:15,944 just to have pansies like you take my freedom away from me. 39 00:01:16,028 --> 00:01:20,449 You went to Vietnam in 1993 to open up a sweatshop! 40 00:01:20,532 --> 00:01:22,743 And a lot of good men died in that sweatshop! 41 00:01:22,826 --> 00:01:24,828 - Oh, my God! You're out of your mind. - Look, look. 42 00:01:24,911 --> 00:01:28,206 The point is that if Charlie took any time to study in school, 43 00:01:28,290 --> 00:01:30,625 he would recognize that the Constitution protects my freedom 44 00:01:30,709 --> 00:01:32,377 to blow smoke all over his face. 45 00:01:32,461 --> 00:01:35,505 You gotta be… You don't know shit about the Constitution, man. 46 00:01:35,589 --> 00:01:37,674 He knows more than you two un-American freedom haters. 47 00:01:37,758 --> 00:01:39,343 - Thank you. - Oh, we hate… Charlie, we hate freedom. 48 00:01:39,426 --> 00:01:40,427 - Yeah. - Ew, we hate it. 49 00:01:40,510 --> 00:01:42,429 - Hate it. Hate freedom. - I'm un-American? 50 00:01:42,512 --> 00:01:44,056 You're practically a Viet Cong. 51 00:01:44,139 --> 00:01:46,308 Oh, is that right? Okay, you wanna talk America? 52 00:01:46,391 --> 00:01:48,310 You wanna learn a little something about America? 53 00:01:48,393 --> 00:01:50,395 - Dee, let's roll out of here. - Where are we going? 54 00:01:50,479 --> 00:01:54,066 We're gonna go America all over their asses! 55 00:02:27,599 --> 00:02:30,936 It is time for the truth! 56 00:02:31,019 --> 00:02:33,980 Five million people will die this year 57 00:02:34,064 --> 00:02:35,899 of smoking-related illnesses! 58 00:02:35,982 --> 00:02:38,402 These body bags, these represent 59 00:02:38,485 --> 00:02:39,736 the number of people 60 00:02:39,820 --> 00:02:43,198 that will die in this city alone today! 61 00:02:43,281 --> 00:02:48,036 It doesn't have to be this way! Let's make smoking history! 62 00:02:48,120 --> 00:02:49,746 Yeah. 63 00:02:51,456 --> 00:02:52,958 Yeah! 64 00:02:53,041 --> 00:02:54,918 Yeah! Yeah, man! 65 00:02:55,002 --> 00:02:58,046 - Yeah. - USA, baby! Whoo! 66 00:02:58,130 --> 00:02:59,881 That's what America's all about, Dee! 67 00:02:59,965 --> 00:03:01,967 - Yeah. - Right here! This is the USA! 68 00:03:02,050 --> 00:03:04,761 Oh, my God! That guy really knew how to pull an audience. 69 00:03:04,845 --> 00:03:08,140 I tell you what. Let's get in on this. 70 00:03:08,223 --> 00:03:10,308 Hey, bro. Great job out there, man. 71 00:03:10,392 --> 00:03:11,435 - Oh, thanks. - I mean, you really… 72 00:03:11,518 --> 00:03:13,645 you had me like hook, line and sinker with that… 73 00:03:13,729 --> 00:03:17,566 It was awesome, dude. It was awesome. So, look, I want in on the cause. 74 00:03:17,649 --> 00:03:20,569 Oh, okay. Just go to the website 75 00:03:20,652 --> 00:03:22,487 - and you can check out… - No, I don't want to do that. 76 00:03:22,571 --> 00:03:24,489 Like I wanna be on the front lines like you, bro. 77 00:03:24,573 --> 00:03:26,450 I wanna be, like, you know, join the team or something. 78 00:03:26,533 --> 00:03:29,411 Naw, it's really complicated. There's a lot of red tape. 79 00:03:29,494 --> 00:03:32,497 - You really can't… - Uh, excuse me, sir. 80 00:03:32,581 --> 00:03:34,499 But just what in the hell do you think you're doing? 81 00:03:35,542 --> 00:03:37,836 Oh, dude. This is just an acting gig. 82 00:03:37,919 --> 00:03:39,963 Like, I'm not really part of any cause. 83 00:03:40,047 --> 00:03:41,465 - Oh, you're an actor? - Mmm-hmm. 84 00:03:41,548 --> 00:03:43,467 Oh. But not a real one? 85 00:03:43,550 --> 00:03:45,177 What the hell is that supposed to mean? 86 00:03:45,260 --> 00:03:48,096 No, just, I mean, you're on the sidewalk. 87 00:03:48,180 --> 00:03:50,098 Oh, right. Right. Like you know what you're talking about. 88 00:03:50,182 --> 00:03:51,308 How old are you? Like, 40? 89 00:03:51,391 --> 00:03:53,310 I live in New York, okay? 90 00:03:53,393 --> 00:03:56,980 Street theater is the only organized artistic expression that we have… 91 00:03:57,064 --> 00:03:58,315 What a crock of shit, man! 92 00:03:58,398 --> 00:04:00,108 - You're living a lie, bro! - Dude, relax. 93 00:04:00,192 --> 00:04:02,319 Oh, relax? Oh, I'm gonna… 94 00:04:02,402 --> 00:04:03,612 - you're gonna throw with me? - What is it? 95 00:04:03,695 --> 00:04:04,738 Little actor boy, you wanna throw with a patriot? 96 00:04:04,821 --> 00:04:07,074 Back off! Back off! 97 00:04:07,157 --> 00:04:09,076 - I'm not 40. - I don't need this. 98 00:04:09,159 --> 00:04:11,745 Get in your van. Get in your van and go, okay? 99 00:04:11,828 --> 00:04:14,873 'Cause I'll throw down! I'll throw down any day of the week! 100 00:04:14,956 --> 00:04:17,376 Get in your little van and drive out of my face! Okay? 101 00:04:17,459 --> 00:04:20,837 Before I go America all over your ass! 102 00:04:23,215 --> 00:04:25,384 You know what? Screw Dee and Charlie. 103 00:04:25,467 --> 00:04:28,095 I'm sick of people telling us what we can and can't do 104 00:04:28,178 --> 00:04:29,304 with our own bar, you know? 105 00:04:29,388 --> 00:04:30,639 What happened to this country? 106 00:04:30,722 --> 00:04:32,599 Why can't we stay open past 2:00 a.m.? 107 00:04:32,683 --> 00:04:36,520 Yes! And why can't we sell booze before noon on Sundays? 108 00:04:36,603 --> 00:04:38,021 These are the kind of puritanical restrictions 109 00:04:38,105 --> 00:04:39,106 that are killing this country. 110 00:04:39,189 --> 00:04:42,401 This is why people flock to places like Las Vegas 111 00:04:42,484 --> 00:04:44,319 and New Orleans and spring break. 112 00:04:44,403 --> 00:04:47,280 Because they're free to go wild. The girls go wild. 113 00:04:47,364 --> 00:04:49,032 The girls in Philly need a place to go wild. 114 00:04:49,116 --> 00:04:50,617 Right. New Orleans was washed away 115 00:04:50,701 --> 00:04:52,577 - in that terrible, terrible storm. - Tragic. 116 00:04:52,661 --> 00:04:54,579 We need to open up Paddy's as a haven for freedom. 117 00:04:54,663 --> 00:04:57,082 - Yes. - A replacement for the tragic loss 118 00:04:57,165 --> 00:04:59,668 - of New Orleans. - We should have gambling too. 119 00:04:59,751 --> 00:05:01,712 - And we should have gambling too. - Sure. 120 00:05:01,795 --> 00:05:03,547 I'm gonna get the ball rolling. 121 00:05:03,630 --> 00:05:04,631 Okay, great. 122 00:05:04,715 --> 00:05:07,300 We will open up Paddy's as the most American bar 123 00:05:07,384 --> 00:05:09,177 in all of America! A place with absolute freedom! 124 00:05:09,261 --> 00:05:10,971 With no gambling restrictions. 125 00:05:11,054 --> 00:05:12,514 Yeah, sure, whatever. Listen, dude. 126 00:05:12,597 --> 00:05:14,349 We should head down to sorority houses, right? 127 00:05:14,433 --> 00:05:16,768 Spread the word, you know? Hand out some leaflets or something. 128 00:05:16,852 --> 00:05:19,604 No, Mac. We should go to the library. 129 00:05:19,688 --> 00:05:20,689 The library? Why? 130 00:05:20,772 --> 00:05:22,441 Yeah, because at sorority houses 131 00:05:22,524 --> 00:05:24,317 you're gonna find nothing but tramps and whores. 132 00:05:24,401 --> 00:05:25,777 Those girls are already wild. 133 00:05:25,861 --> 00:05:28,864 - Perfect. - No, no. Mac, you're not listening to me. 134 00:05:28,947 --> 00:05:31,366 We don't want wild girls. 135 00:05:31,450 --> 00:05:35,162 We want real girls going wild. 136 00:05:35,245 --> 00:05:39,166 It's important to see the transition. You want to watch the process. 137 00:05:42,294 --> 00:05:45,380 Dee, what the hell is the point of this stretching? 138 00:05:45,464 --> 00:05:47,341 Charlie, if we're gonna put on our own demonstration, 139 00:05:47,424 --> 00:05:49,509 then your body needs to be in tip-top shape out there. 140 00:05:49,593 --> 00:05:51,428 My body is in tip-top shape. 141 00:05:51,511 --> 00:05:53,764 Well, maybe for a small, fat person. Not for an actor. 142 00:05:53,847 --> 00:05:56,266 - Fat person? - A chunky… Chunky… 143 00:05:56,350 --> 00:05:57,851 A chunky person? Where are you getting that? 144 00:05:57,934 --> 00:06:01,563 - A husky person. - Since when? Oh! 145 00:06:01,646 --> 00:06:03,565 - Really? - You know what? All right, forget it. 146 00:06:03,648 --> 00:06:05,484 - I'm not an actor anyway. - I know. 147 00:06:05,567 --> 00:06:08,695 Yeah. Well, then I'm a protestor, right? 148 00:06:08,779 --> 00:06:09,780 - I'm a patriot. - Mmm-hmm. 149 00:06:09,863 --> 00:06:10,864 - Give me that. - Okay. 150 00:06:10,947 --> 00:06:12,449 - That's my bag. - I know, but the thing is, 151 00:06:12,532 --> 00:06:14,201 what I need from you is for you to feed me some lines. 152 00:06:14,284 --> 00:06:16,161 - I can feed you lines. - And then I'll go from there. 153 00:06:16,244 --> 00:06:17,996 - I just don't need all the… - I can take over. 154 00:06:18,080 --> 00:06:19,331 All right. Let's do it. What do you want me to do? 155 00:06:19,414 --> 00:06:20,957 Let's focus on finding your breath. 156 00:06:21,041 --> 00:06:22,793 - What? - Where is your breath? 157 00:06:24,044 --> 00:06:26,880 - In my mouth? - No, it starts in your chest. 158 00:06:26,963 --> 00:06:28,674 You got to focus on your diaphragm. 159 00:06:28,757 --> 00:06:30,300 What the hell's a diaphragm? 160 00:06:30,384 --> 00:06:31,510 Right here. Putting your diaphragm… 161 00:06:31,593 --> 00:06:33,845 - No. The diaphragm is a… - No. Really? 162 00:06:33,929 --> 00:06:35,263 - Yeah. - That's all you know? 163 00:06:35,347 --> 00:06:37,349 - It blocks the babies out. - Okay, yeah. That's what… 164 00:06:37,432 --> 00:06:38,642 How'd you make it this far in life? 165 00:06:38,725 --> 00:06:40,644 Look, Dee, this is ridiculous, okay? 166 00:06:40,727 --> 00:06:42,562 Let's just get out there. Let's speak the truth. 167 00:06:42,646 --> 00:06:45,399 Let's kick a little ass America style. We'll get all up in it! 168 00:06:45,482 --> 00:06:48,110 I'm trying to protect you. I don't want you freezing up out there. 169 00:06:49,319 --> 00:06:50,612 - What? Freezing up? - Yeah. 170 00:06:50,696 --> 00:06:53,031 Yeah. All those people staring at you and judging you 171 00:06:53,115 --> 00:06:57,035 and not liking the stuff and talking about you. 172 00:06:57,119 --> 00:06:58,745 - Are you serious? - Yeah, I am. 173 00:06:58,829 --> 00:07:00,330 - Your body could betray you… - Yeah. 174 00:07:00,414 --> 00:07:01,999 - …in any number of ways… - Like how? 175 00:07:02,082 --> 00:07:06,003 Like, you know, one of… Locking up and maybe 176 00:07:06,086 --> 00:07:08,130 - throwing up and stuff. - Really? 177 00:07:08,213 --> 00:07:09,339 Yeah. You want to find your breath? 178 00:07:09,423 --> 00:07:10,799 - Yeah. - Yeah. 179 00:07:12,009 --> 00:07:13,343 It's in my mouth. 180 00:07:14,553 --> 00:07:16,805 One, two, three! 181 00:07:16,888 --> 00:07:19,141 - Hey! - Oh, my God! 182 00:07:19,224 --> 00:07:20,726 You girls have gone wild! 183 00:07:20,809 --> 00:07:21,893 - You've gone wild! - You went wild! 184 00:07:21,977 --> 00:07:23,854 - You're wild! - You girls went wild! 185 00:07:23,937 --> 00:07:25,188 - Way to go! - Oh. 186 00:07:25,272 --> 00:07:26,732 - Yeah. - Nice. This is what it was like 187 00:07:26,815 --> 00:07:27,858 to have a bar in New Orleans, bro. 188 00:07:27,941 --> 00:07:30,402 Oh, man! New Orleans really had their shit figured out! 189 00:07:30,485 --> 00:07:32,112 Oh, they totally had their shit figured out. 190 00:07:32,195 --> 00:07:33,530 Yeah, except for the levees. 191 00:07:33,613 --> 00:07:35,157 Right, yeah. Except for the levees. 192 00:07:35,240 --> 00:07:37,200 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, and the evacuation plan. 193 00:07:37,284 --> 00:07:38,410 Hey, oh! 194 00:07:38,493 --> 00:07:40,287 Oh! You've gone wild! 195 00:07:40,370 --> 00:07:41,663 You've gone wild! You've gone wild! 196 00:07:41,747 --> 00:07:43,248 - You went wild! - You see, This is what America's 197 00:07:43,332 --> 00:07:44,333 - all about! - This is America! 198 00:07:44,416 --> 00:07:46,251 We have set up an American utopia! 199 00:07:46,335 --> 00:07:48,670 Yeah! That could be a bit of a problem back there though. 200 00:07:52,549 --> 00:07:54,426 Yeah, that could get weird. 201 00:07:54,509 --> 00:07:56,094 Yeah, it's really smoky. 202 00:07:56,178 --> 00:07:58,347 You know, I didn't want to say it because of the spirit of this whole thing. 203 00:07:58,430 --> 00:07:59,723 But I think you're right. It's a little much. 204 00:08:00,891 --> 00:08:02,267 These fellas don't mess around. 205 00:08:02,351 --> 00:08:05,062 This is high-stakes shit. You think you can get one 206 00:08:05,145 --> 00:08:06,146 of these white broads 207 00:08:06,229 --> 00:08:08,648 to come over and do a table dance for Alan and the boys? 208 00:08:08,732 --> 00:08:11,276 No table dances, okay? That's what we were worried about. 209 00:08:11,360 --> 00:08:13,570 Listen, Frank. If you can keep those guys as far jammed 210 00:08:13,653 --> 00:08:15,280 - into that corner as possible… - Push 'em into the corner. 211 00:08:15,364 --> 00:08:16,823 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Segregation! 212 00:08:16,907 --> 00:08:19,034 That's segregation! That's not what this is all about. 213 00:08:19,117 --> 00:08:20,744 America is a melting pot. 214 00:08:20,827 --> 00:08:22,871 But it might be good to set up some boundaries. 215 00:08:22,954 --> 00:08:24,206 Boundaries? 216 00:08:24,289 --> 00:08:26,708 Sounds like it's coming right out of Stalin's mouth. 217 00:08:26,792 --> 00:08:28,627 Stalin's mouth? That is not what we're talking about. 218 00:08:28,710 --> 00:08:30,295 - We're just saying… - I don't know who Stalin is. 219 00:08:30,379 --> 00:08:31,922 - He doesn't even… - Who the hell is Stalin? Listen, man. 220 00:08:32,005 --> 00:08:34,549 - How do you not know? - Just keep them under control. 221 00:08:34,633 --> 00:08:36,927 You betcha. Oh, here. 222 00:08:37,010 --> 00:08:39,471 They want you to play this Vietnamese music. 223 00:08:39,554 --> 00:08:41,098 They don't like what's playing here. 224 00:08:41,181 --> 00:08:44,601 Okay, listen. Compromise. Tonight we keep things the way they are. 225 00:08:44,685 --> 00:08:46,144 Tomorrow night, we'll play this shit. 226 00:08:46,228 --> 00:08:48,480 All right. Good. I gotta get back there now because Alan 227 00:08:48,563 --> 00:08:52,651 is just about to bet his wife's glass eye in the next hand. 228 00:08:56,363 --> 00:08:58,949 Ladies and gentlemen, we are about to speak the truth. 229 00:08:59,032 --> 00:09:01,535 We're not gonna spout a bunch of words that are facts, 230 00:09:01,618 --> 00:09:04,746 like some big jerk from New York who thinks he's great. 231 00:09:04,830 --> 00:09:06,999 We're gonna show you a dramatic interpretation. 232 00:09:08,291 --> 00:09:11,420 Hello, young man. I'm a bigwig from Big Tobacco. 233 00:09:11,503 --> 00:09:14,965 I work over here at T.J. Boris. Can I offer you a cigarette? 234 00:09:19,761 --> 00:09:21,471 God damn it, Charlie. 235 00:09:32,858 --> 00:09:34,735 Let's try and look at the bright side here. 236 00:09:34,818 --> 00:09:36,737 This music sounds like whales raping each other. 237 00:09:36,820 --> 00:09:39,656 It does. It does indeed. But the T-shirts are working. 238 00:09:39,740 --> 00:09:42,492 Isn't that amazing? You ask to see a woman's breasts on the street, 239 00:09:42,576 --> 00:09:44,786 you get slapped. You give her a free T-shirt and videotape it, 240 00:09:44,870 --> 00:09:46,663 - and the clothes come right off. - I love this country. 241 00:09:46,747 --> 00:09:47,748 - Yeah. - Hey-o! 242 00:09:47,831 --> 00:09:49,875 Hey, sweetie. You want a T-shirt? 243 00:09:49,958 --> 00:09:52,044 - Okay. - All right. 244 00:09:53,462 --> 00:09:54,504 What? Why'd you stop? 245 00:09:54,588 --> 00:09:56,506 What's wrong? What's wrong? 246 00:09:56,590 --> 00:09:58,592 - What happened? - What are you doing? 247 00:09:58,675 --> 00:10:00,719 - Whoa! Come on, pal! - Dude. What are you doing? 248 00:10:00,802 --> 00:10:02,471 - You're blowing up our spot! - You're just standing there? 249 00:10:02,554 --> 00:10:03,930 Take a walk! 250 00:10:05,140 --> 00:10:07,267 Maybe it's time we set up some rules. 251 00:10:07,351 --> 00:10:09,186 No. dude. We can't do that. No rules. 252 00:10:09,269 --> 00:10:11,146 Your father is killing our freedom! 253 00:10:11,229 --> 00:10:12,314 I know! I know! 254 00:10:12,397 --> 00:10:13,982 Hey. Hey, you still want that T-shirt? 255 00:10:14,066 --> 00:10:15,484 - Yeah. - Yeah? All right. 256 00:10:15,567 --> 00:10:17,152 - Okay, any time you're ready. - Okay. 257 00:10:19,321 --> 00:10:22,157 - Oh, what? What's wrong now? - What? Ruined again! 258 00:10:22,240 --> 00:10:24,368 Whoa! Jesus! 259 00:10:24,451 --> 00:10:26,912 - Hey, man. - I thought you guys were in jail. 260 00:10:26,995 --> 00:10:28,080 Parole. 261 00:10:28,163 --> 00:10:32,459 We heard you guys have a, uh, "anything goes" type situation here. 262 00:10:32,542 --> 00:10:34,044 Can we get a couple glasses of milk? 263 00:10:34,127 --> 00:10:36,088 - What? No. - No. You can't have milk. 264 00:10:36,171 --> 00:10:37,756 You can't have milk. No. 265 00:10:37,839 --> 00:10:38,840 Come on, man. 266 00:10:38,924 --> 00:10:40,842 Oh, for… You know what? Get out of here. 267 00:10:40,926 --> 00:10:42,344 Could you guys go over there for a second? 268 00:10:42,427 --> 00:10:43,679 Yeah. We gotta… We gotta talk for a second. 269 00:10:43,762 --> 00:10:46,181 If you could just… 270 00:10:47,683 --> 00:10:48,684 What are we gonna do? 271 00:10:48,767 --> 00:10:49,935 I did not see this coming. 272 00:10:50,018 --> 00:10:52,312 We cannot have the McPoyle brothers in here creeping everybody out, bro. 273 00:10:52,396 --> 00:10:54,272 What if Charlie comes in here? He sent them to jail. 274 00:10:54,356 --> 00:10:56,024 They may be planning to stab him. 275 00:10:56,108 --> 00:10:57,734 They bang each other, Dennis. 276 00:10:57,818 --> 00:10:59,986 And they bang each other. They bang each other's… 277 00:11:01,446 --> 00:11:04,616 All right, let's set up a couple rules. We'll set up a couple rules. 278 00:11:04,700 --> 00:11:08,996 Okay, guys, you can stay. But none of your weird shit. 279 00:11:10,205 --> 00:11:11,957 - I don't follow. - Ugh. All right, listen. 280 00:11:12,040 --> 00:11:14,001 We've heard some things about you two. 281 00:11:14,084 --> 00:11:18,130 I'm not gonna get into the specifics. We just don't want it in the bar, okay? 282 00:11:19,673 --> 00:11:22,968 It's a free country, bitch. 283 00:11:32,769 --> 00:11:34,563 We may have a problem on our hands, dude. 284 00:11:34,646 --> 00:11:37,941 - Do we have any sharp knives? - What? 285 00:11:38,025 --> 00:11:40,986 These guys are maniacs. They wanna start bettin' fingers. 286 00:11:41,069 --> 00:11:43,113 - Fingers? - What are you talking about? 287 00:11:43,196 --> 00:11:46,199 If Alan loses this hand, he's gonna start chopping off his fingers. 288 00:11:46,283 --> 00:11:47,492 I've never seen anything like it in my life! 289 00:11:47,576 --> 00:11:49,453 - Okay. This has gone way too far! - This is getting ridiculous. 290 00:11:49,536 --> 00:11:51,371 - Dad, your friends, they gotta go! - Bullshit. 291 00:11:51,455 --> 00:11:53,498 You are killing our freedom, man! 292 00:11:53,582 --> 00:11:56,084 This is what freedom's all about. I'm living on the edge. 293 00:11:56,168 --> 00:11:57,502 Okay, we're gonna find a compromise here, all right? 294 00:11:57,586 --> 00:12:00,797 Uh, we'll take the bar and you can have the basement! 295 00:12:00,881 --> 00:12:03,008 - Yes! - You want to put me in the basement? 296 00:12:03,091 --> 00:12:04,384 Yeah, yeah, man. You can do whatever you want! 297 00:12:04,468 --> 00:12:05,761 Anything goes in the basement! 298 00:12:05,844 --> 00:12:07,763 If I go in the basement, I can do anything I want? 299 00:12:07,846 --> 00:12:10,557 - Anything you want! - No holds barred? There's no limits? 300 00:12:10,640 --> 00:12:11,892 - No limits! - None. 301 00:12:13,643 --> 00:12:15,020 All right. I'll take the basement. 302 00:12:15,103 --> 00:12:16,104 Great. 303 00:12:16,188 --> 00:12:18,815 And now, if you don't mind, I'll take those knives. 304 00:12:18,899 --> 00:12:20,567 - All right. Get the knives. - Yeah. And use 'em. 305 00:12:27,366 --> 00:12:30,118 What the hell happened in here? 306 00:12:30,202 --> 00:12:32,120 Looks like Jonestown. 307 00:12:32,204 --> 00:12:34,623 Oh, look who it is! 308 00:12:34,706 --> 00:12:35,791 Come to join the party, huh? 309 00:12:35,874 --> 00:12:37,042 No. We came back to work. 310 00:12:37,125 --> 00:12:39,294 - Oh, have you? - I guess the strike's over, Mac. 311 00:12:39,378 --> 00:12:40,671 The workers have returned. 312 00:12:40,754 --> 00:12:43,548 Uh, I wasn't on strike, okay? I still need to make a living. 313 00:12:43,632 --> 00:12:45,300 What in the hell has been going on in here? 314 00:12:45,384 --> 00:12:47,094 And where is that music coming from? 315 00:12:47,177 --> 00:12:50,222 From the basement. Frank and the boys have been rocking all night long. 316 00:12:50,305 --> 00:12:52,599 - Doing what? - I have no idea. But I bet it's fun. 317 00:12:52,683 --> 00:12:54,643 We've had a line of 50 people outside every night. 318 00:12:54,726 --> 00:12:56,812 Yep. See, our bar is about fun and freedom. 319 00:12:56,895 --> 00:12:58,480 I don't know if you guys have ever heard of that. Freedom? 320 00:12:58,563 --> 00:13:00,232 Yeah. Stick around, bitches. You might learn something 321 00:13:00,315 --> 00:13:01,817 about the good old US of A. 322 00:13:03,193 --> 00:13:04,403 Hey, Charles. 323 00:13:04,486 --> 00:13:06,113 Holy shit! 324 00:13:06,196 --> 00:13:07,531 How's it hanging? 325 00:13:07,614 --> 00:13:10,117 What? No! What? No! What are these guys doing here? 326 00:13:10,200 --> 00:13:12,369 Charlie, settle. 327 00:13:12,452 --> 00:13:15,747 Yeah, man. Chillax. We're cool. 328 00:13:16,915 --> 00:13:18,417 Bump it. 329 00:13:18,500 --> 00:13:20,210 No. I'm not gonna bump your… Please go. 330 00:13:20,293 --> 00:13:21,336 - No. - Please walk away. 331 00:13:21,420 --> 00:13:24,172 Please walk away from me. Please walk away from me. 332 00:13:24,256 --> 00:13:25,465 Walk away. 333 00:13:28,176 --> 00:13:29,428 How could you do this to me? 334 00:13:29,511 --> 00:13:31,513 Okay, Charlie. We don't want them in the bar either, okay? 335 00:13:31,596 --> 00:13:32,848 But freedom has a price. 336 00:13:32,931 --> 00:13:34,891 The McPoyles are probably gonna stab me. 337 00:13:34,975 --> 00:13:37,352 And freedom has its price? I can't believe you guys! 338 00:13:37,436 --> 00:13:39,438 You know what? Let me kick down a little thing to you 339 00:13:39,521 --> 00:13:41,064 that our founding fathers kicked down to me. 340 00:13:41,148 --> 00:13:43,233 It goes, "Don't tread on me." 341 00:13:43,316 --> 00:13:46,361 And right now you guys are treading all over me! 342 00:13:46,445 --> 00:13:47,529 Dee, let's roll. 343 00:13:47,612 --> 00:13:48,613 I don't want to go with you. 344 00:13:48,697 --> 00:13:49,948 - What? - Mmm-mmm. 345 00:13:50,032 --> 00:13:51,408 Come on. You're my actor. I need you. 346 00:13:51,491 --> 00:13:52,576 I know. But you're so bad at protesting. 347 00:13:52,659 --> 00:13:54,411 - Come on, Dee. You're my actor. - I don't want to go. 348 00:13:54,494 --> 00:13:55,954 - Now you're treading on me! - I'm not treading on you. 349 00:13:56,038 --> 00:13:57,581 - Yeah, you are. You're treading on me. - No. I don't want to go. 350 00:13:57,664 --> 00:13:58,749 - And you're not supposed to! - I don't want to go. 351 00:13:58,832 --> 00:13:59,833 - Are you kidding me? - No. 352 00:13:59,916 --> 00:14:01,293 Is everyone gonna tread on me? 353 00:14:02,586 --> 00:14:04,963 Oh, my God. Okay. Okay. 354 00:14:05,047 --> 00:14:06,965 I'm gonna rise up, I'm gonna kick a little ass 355 00:14:07,049 --> 00:14:08,550 Gonna kick some ass in the USA 356 00:14:08,633 --> 00:14:10,385 Gonna climb a mountain, gonna sew a flag 357 00:14:10,469 --> 00:14:11,845 Gonna fly on an eagle 358 00:14:11,928 --> 00:14:13,847 I'm gonna kick some butt, I'm gonna drive a big truck 359 00:14:13,930 --> 00:14:15,766 I'm gonna rule this world, I'm gonna kick some ass 360 00:14:15,849 --> 00:14:17,768 I'm gonna rise up, I'm gonna kick a little ass 361 00:14:17,851 --> 00:14:23,231 Rock, flag and eagle 362 00:14:26,818 --> 00:14:27,986 So you're still trying to be an actor then? 363 00:14:28,070 --> 00:14:29,654 - Shut your mouth, Dennis. - So now I can call her a failure. 364 00:14:29,738 --> 00:14:32,407 - I am not a failure. - Dennis, what is it that you call it 365 00:14:32,491 --> 00:14:34,743 when somebody tries to do something but doesn't succeed? 366 00:14:34,826 --> 00:14:37,037 - Oh, yeah. - Uh, that would, in fact, be a failure. 367 00:14:37,120 --> 00:14:38,872 - Dee's a failure. - Okay. You want to see some acting? 368 00:14:38,955 --> 00:14:40,123 Is that what you want? You want to see some acting? 369 00:14:40,207 --> 00:14:43,752 Guess what. I am gonna act the shit out of somebody's ass. 370 00:14:46,672 --> 00:14:48,882 So here's the thing, Artemis. I know last time we saw each other, 371 00:14:48,965 --> 00:14:52,302 things got kind of awkward when you licked my brother's face. 372 00:14:52,386 --> 00:14:54,471 But I need some help from an actor, 373 00:14:54,554 --> 00:14:56,306 'cause I've been doing this gig with my friend Charlie, 374 00:14:56,390 --> 00:14:58,350 and he is really bringing me down. 375 00:14:58,433 --> 00:15:01,395 Oh. Not everyone has the gift. 376 00:15:02,562 --> 00:15:04,731 Want to smoke some hash? 377 00:15:05,816 --> 00:15:09,194 No. Thank you. So can you help me here? 378 00:15:09,277 --> 00:15:11,321 - What's the venue? - The sidewalk. 379 00:15:11,405 --> 00:15:12,739 I don't do sidewalks. 380 00:15:12,823 --> 00:15:14,199 Okay. See, that's what I thought. 381 00:15:14,282 --> 00:15:16,243 But then I realized if you think about it, 382 00:15:16,326 --> 00:15:18,912 street performing, it's the last true form 383 00:15:18,996 --> 00:15:21,581 of organic artistic expression. 384 00:15:21,665 --> 00:15:22,666 - Is that so? - Yes. 385 00:15:22,749 --> 00:15:24,251 I think you and I need to get out there. 386 00:15:24,334 --> 00:15:26,712 We need to prove to the world that we still got it. 387 00:15:26,795 --> 00:15:29,715 Sweet, Sweet Dee, 388 00:15:29,798 --> 00:15:33,010 it's not something you can lose, okay? 389 00:15:33,093 --> 00:15:35,429 Right. So let's go show the world. 390 00:15:36,680 --> 00:15:38,640 Is there any nudity involved? 391 00:15:38,724 --> 00:15:39,725 No. 392 00:15:39,808 --> 00:15:41,810 Can there be? 393 00:15:41,893 --> 00:15:43,145 No. 394 00:15:45,063 --> 00:15:47,107 I'll do it anyway. 395 00:15:53,905 --> 00:15:56,783 I don't understand this. 396 00:15:56,867 --> 00:15:59,995 McPoyles. McPoyles everywhere, dude. 397 00:16:00,078 --> 00:16:01,872 Girls don't want to go wild in this environment, 398 00:16:01,955 --> 00:16:03,665 not even for T-shirts! 399 00:16:03,749 --> 00:16:06,335 Hey, man. My sister wants to ask you something. 400 00:16:06,418 --> 00:16:08,086 - What? - She's mute, dude. 401 00:16:08,170 --> 00:16:10,964 - Mute? - Okay, what? 402 00:16:11,048 --> 00:16:12,966 She wants to show you her boobies. 403 00:16:13,050 --> 00:16:15,302 - What? No! No! - No! No! No! 404 00:16:15,385 --> 00:16:17,971 Trust me. They're top-notch. 405 00:16:18,055 --> 00:16:19,348 - God damn it! God damn it! - That is disgusting! 406 00:16:19,431 --> 00:16:20,557 - What is wrong with you people? - That's your sister! 407 00:16:20,640 --> 00:16:21,850 - All of you. - Hey, man. 408 00:16:21,933 --> 00:16:23,310 There's nothing wrong with us. 409 00:16:23,393 --> 00:16:25,896 We're just expressing ourselves. 410 00:16:25,979 --> 00:16:27,606 Society has the problem. 411 00:16:33,320 --> 00:16:35,280 - Where do you keep your Pledge? - Get out of here. 412 00:16:35,364 --> 00:16:36,740 - Get the hell out of here. - Go away. 413 00:16:36,823 --> 00:16:38,367 - Go with your brother and sister. - Take a walk. 414 00:16:39,451 --> 00:16:42,496 Dee, thank you so much for this acting opportunity. 415 00:16:42,579 --> 00:16:45,540 I can tell it is going to be a glorious performance. 416 00:16:45,624 --> 00:16:48,877 Those guys are full of shit, Artemis. There's not 50 people here. 417 00:16:48,960 --> 00:16:50,253 Focus, Dee, focus! 418 00:16:50,337 --> 00:16:51,630 Yeah, but that's the reason why we're here. 419 00:16:51,713 --> 00:16:53,131 Those guys said there would be a big crowd. 420 00:16:53,215 --> 00:16:54,675 We'll draw them in. 421 00:16:54,758 --> 00:16:55,967 All right. 422 00:16:56,051 --> 00:16:59,221 Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, please gather around. 423 00:16:59,304 --> 00:17:02,432 You're about to see an original street performance. 424 00:17:02,516 --> 00:17:05,686 Take yourselves to the foggy streets of London. 425 00:17:05,769 --> 00:17:07,396 The year is 1888. 426 00:17:07,479 --> 00:17:11,942 There's a killer on the loose. His name, Jack the Ripper. 427 00:17:12,025 --> 00:17:15,862 Two women walking alone home from a holiday cotillion. 428 00:17:18,240 --> 00:17:20,325 - I say… - Get out of here! Get out of here! 429 00:17:20,409 --> 00:17:22,202 If you come to this bar, you're gonna get cancer and die! 430 00:17:22,285 --> 00:17:23,912 - What are you doing? - We're protesting the bar! 431 00:17:23,996 --> 00:17:26,373 Attica! Attica! 432 00:17:26,456 --> 00:17:29,376 Attica, man! Attica, man! 433 00:17:29,459 --> 00:17:32,087 - Attica, man! Attica! - What are you doing? 434 00:17:32,170 --> 00:17:34,506 Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hey, man! What are you doing? 435 00:17:34,589 --> 00:17:35,590 Tying off. 436 00:17:35,674 --> 00:17:37,843 No! No! No! Go tie off somewhere else! 437 00:17:37,926 --> 00:17:39,219 I thought we could do whatever we want. 438 00:17:39,302 --> 00:17:40,637 Give me the hose. Give me the little rubber hose. 439 00:17:40,721 --> 00:17:41,722 Whoa, he's got a knife! 440 00:17:41,805 --> 00:17:44,599 Okay, great. He's got a knife. Of course he does! Why not? 441 00:17:44,683 --> 00:17:46,059 You know what? Keep the little rubber hose! 442 00:17:46,143 --> 00:17:48,854 - Good luck with that. - Good life decision, man. 443 00:17:48,937 --> 00:17:51,732 Mac, I think we gave people too much freedom. 444 00:17:51,815 --> 00:17:53,316 Yeah, you're right, man. I'll call the cops. 445 00:17:53,400 --> 00:17:54,901 No, no, no, no, no. We can't call the cops. 446 00:17:54,985 --> 00:17:55,986 That's admitting failure. 447 00:17:56,069 --> 00:17:57,821 Dennis, we gave people too much freedom. 448 00:17:57,904 --> 00:18:00,073 That's the problem! All they do is exploit it! 449 00:18:00,157 --> 00:18:02,284 It becomes anarchy, and that is not what America is all about. 450 00:18:02,367 --> 00:18:04,661 - No. - I mean, America is… 451 00:18:04,745 --> 00:18:06,413 Oh, my God! 452 00:18:08,582 --> 00:18:09,624 Yeah. 453 00:18:14,921 --> 00:18:17,132 Come on, Dee! Don't quit! Come on. 454 00:18:17,215 --> 00:18:20,052 - We just rocked out there, Dee! - Oh, we did? Yeah, we did. 455 00:18:20,135 --> 00:18:21,970 - Don't be a quitter. Okay? - You know what? I don't care. 456 00:18:22,054 --> 00:18:24,014 I don't want to act anymore. I quit. I want to drink. 457 00:18:24,097 --> 00:18:25,349 That's what I would like to do for the rest of my life. 458 00:18:25,432 --> 00:18:27,017 - Don't give up. - Why don't you leave me alone? 459 00:18:27,100 --> 00:18:29,478 Can you imagine an America where everyone just gives up? 460 00:18:29,561 --> 00:18:31,021 - I don't care. - Okay, great. Let's just give up! 461 00:18:31,104 --> 00:18:32,439 - All right, Charlie. - Hey, guys. How're you doing? 462 00:18:32,522 --> 00:18:33,982 Have you come to gloat and shove it in my face? 463 00:18:34,066 --> 00:18:35,442 - No. - No, it's okay. You can. You know why? 464 00:18:35,525 --> 00:18:38,362 'Cause I give up. Yeah, I'm living in give-up America now. 465 00:18:38,445 --> 00:18:39,446 - What are you talking about? - Will you shut up? 466 00:18:39,529 --> 00:18:41,323 Look at this! I'm gonna be a smoker too. 467 00:18:41,406 --> 00:18:43,658 - You don't have to smoke, Charlie. - No, we can. You know why? 468 00:18:43,742 --> 00:18:45,911 'Cause we give up. We live in give-up America. 469 00:18:45,994 --> 00:18:48,038 I live in give-up America. 470 00:18:48,121 --> 00:18:50,457 We're living in America. Hey, Ryan. How are you doing? 471 00:18:50,540 --> 00:18:53,085 Look, man, I'm sorry to interrupt you, but if you're not too busy 472 00:18:53,168 --> 00:18:55,504 showering in your brother's urine or plotting your revenge against me, 473 00:18:55,587 --> 00:18:57,339 you mind lighting my cigarette? 474 00:18:57,422 --> 00:19:00,050 Thanks, bro. Hey, Liam. I'm sorry I sent you to jail, man. 475 00:19:00,133 --> 00:19:02,719 But any time you wanna stab me, it'd be really great for me. 476 00:19:04,554 --> 00:19:06,515 That's what you get, Charlie! 477 00:19:06,598 --> 00:19:08,350 Whoa, hey! Get the hell out of here! 478 00:19:08,433 --> 00:19:09,810 - You get fork stabbed! - Get out of here! 479 00:19:09,893 --> 00:19:11,770 - Get out! - Fork stabbed! 480 00:19:11,853 --> 00:19:13,689 Get out! 481 00:19:13,772 --> 00:19:15,607 And don't try to mess with us 'cause now we're even! 482 00:19:15,691 --> 00:19:17,984 - Get out of here! - Nobody messes with the McPoyles! 483 00:19:18,068 --> 00:19:20,487 Oh, you had to make a scene, Charlie! 484 00:19:20,570 --> 00:19:22,531 You had to run your mouth in front of psychopaths, didn't you? 485 00:19:22,614 --> 00:19:23,824 I just got stabbed with a fork! 486 00:19:23,907 --> 00:19:25,200 Yeah, well whose fault is that, Captain America? 487 00:19:25,283 --> 00:19:27,285 - Way to go! - It's Dee's fault for quitting on me. 488 00:19:27,369 --> 00:19:29,204 - Oh, it's Dee's fault! - How is it… 489 00:19:29,287 --> 00:19:31,331 maybe it's your fault for being horrible at everything! 490 00:19:31,415 --> 00:19:32,499 Here we go with this again. 491 00:19:32,582 --> 00:19:34,251 Everybody pass the buck! Pass the blame! 492 00:19:34,334 --> 00:19:37,254 Dennis, we have to admit, it's over. It's done. 493 00:19:37,337 --> 00:19:39,881 We gotta get all of these assholes out of here right now. 494 00:19:39,965 --> 00:19:43,552 Dee, you get everybody out of the bar. Charlie, you're a disappointment. 495 00:19:43,635 --> 00:19:45,846 Come on. Let's go get everybody out of the basement. 496 00:19:45,929 --> 00:19:47,931 God only knows what's going on down there. 497 00:20:18,503 --> 00:20:20,672 I'll call the cops. 498 00:20:21,840 --> 00:20:23,008 Frank!