1 00:00:00,602 --> 00:00:01,645 Really? I thought it was boring. 2 00:00:01,770 --> 00:00:03,438 Boring? It's about the end of the world, Dee. 3 00:00:03,522 --> 00:00:05,273 Inconvenient Truth is not about the end of the world. 4 00:00:05,357 --> 00:00:06,942 It is about how if we don't stop global warming, 5 00:00:07,025 --> 00:00:08,735 we are going to destroy this environment. 6 00:00:08,819 --> 00:00:09,986 I think it sounds cool. I'll check it out. 7 00:00:10,070 --> 00:00:11,071 It is. It's awesome. 8 00:00:13,073 --> 00:00:14,908 Dude, come on. What the hell is that? 9 00:00:15,283 --> 00:00:16,284 What? 10 00:00:16,618 --> 00:00:17,703 Are you kidding me? 11 00:00:18,370 --> 00:00:20,914 - What is the big deal, Dennis? - What is the big deal? Are you nuts? 12 00:00:20,997 --> 00:00:22,082 It's like you see a movie, 13 00:00:22,165 --> 00:00:23,583 and now you're crazy about the environment. 14 00:00:23,667 --> 00:00:25,877 Oh, I'm sorry, Dee. Maybe I would actually like to do some good 15 00:00:26,002 --> 00:00:27,421 in this world, maybe I would like to make a difference. 16 00:00:27,546 --> 00:00:29,214 - Oh, you would? You wanna do good? - Ooh… Yes. Yes. 17 00:00:29,339 --> 00:00:30,966 - You can't do good. - You're not good at that. 18 00:00:31,049 --> 00:00:32,384 - I can do good. - No. 19 00:00:32,509 --> 00:00:33,510 I am capable of doing good. 20 00:00:33,593 --> 00:00:34,594 - No. - No, you just screw people over 21 00:00:34,678 --> 00:00:35,762 for your own benefit. 22 00:00:35,846 --> 00:00:38,306 You guys are gonna be so angry when you look back and you see 23 00:00:38,390 --> 00:00:39,975 that the world looks at Dennis Reynolds and says, 24 00:00:40,058 --> 00:00:42,894 "Dennis, you are a good person. You are making a…" 25 00:00:45,188 --> 00:00:46,440 Holy shit. 26 00:00:47,065 --> 00:00:48,066 What? 27 00:00:49,192 --> 00:00:50,861 There's a baby in this dumpster. 28 00:01:28,106 --> 00:01:29,691 What the hell is it doing? 29 00:01:29,775 --> 00:01:31,735 - We got to call somebody. - Who? 30 00:01:31,818 --> 00:01:34,029 The police? The mother? I mean, think, Dee. 31 00:01:34,112 --> 00:01:37,074 Somebody threw this baby in the trash. We can't just put it back into the system. 32 00:01:37,157 --> 00:01:39,326 - It is a terrible system. - It's a horrible system. 33 00:01:39,409 --> 00:01:40,494 We live in a throwaway culture 34 00:01:40,577 --> 00:01:42,204 where everyone's just lookin' for the easy way out. 35 00:01:42,287 --> 00:01:43,789 You don't wanna carry your Big Gulp anymore? 36 00:01:43,872 --> 00:01:44,873 Just throw it in the street. 37 00:01:44,998 --> 00:01:45,999 Don't wanna take care of your baby anymore? 38 00:01:46,083 --> 00:01:47,250 Throw it in a dumpster. 39 00:01:47,334 --> 00:01:48,835 I just can't take it. 40 00:01:49,002 --> 00:01:50,003 Charlie, you're harpin' on it. 41 00:01:50,128 --> 00:01:51,129 - That's called harping. - Well, I'm sorry. 42 00:01:51,213 --> 00:01:53,757 I'd like to know whether or not I share a bed with my father. 43 00:01:53,840 --> 00:01:55,759 I'm tellin' you, I am not your father. 44 00:01:55,842 --> 00:01:57,260 - Then take a stupid blood test. - Enough! 45 00:01:57,344 --> 00:01:59,096 - I'm not takin' no blood test. - It's so easy. 46 00:01:59,179 --> 00:02:00,555 - It's a little prick… - Look, I've had enough of this. 47 00:02:00,639 --> 00:02:03,475 I'm not even gonna talk about… What the hell is that? 48 00:02:03,558 --> 00:02:05,268 It's a baby we found in the trash. 49 00:02:07,104 --> 00:02:08,855 Well, put it back. It doesn't belong to you. 50 00:02:08,939 --> 00:02:10,440 We're not gonna put it back. 51 00:02:10,524 --> 00:02:11,566 Give it to the cops. 52 00:02:11,650 --> 00:02:13,151 Get it out of here. It's bad for business. 53 00:02:13,235 --> 00:02:14,736 Oh, that's great, Frank. Pass the buck. 54 00:02:14,820 --> 00:02:16,697 Just passin'… Everybody passin' the buck. 55 00:02:16,822 --> 00:02:18,949 It's time we started taking responsibility 56 00:02:19,032 --> 00:02:22,035 - for the refuse we're creating. - Oh, my God, dude. Are you still harpin' 57 00:02:22,119 --> 00:02:24,579 on that stupid global heating movie you saw? 58 00:02:24,663 --> 00:02:27,499 - "Global warming," Charlie. - Yeah. Right. 59 00:02:27,708 --> 00:02:30,419 Like the earth is magically getting hotter. 60 00:02:30,502 --> 00:02:33,338 All right, stop! Clearly this is not the right environment for a child. 61 00:02:33,422 --> 00:02:36,091 I will take care of the Dumpster Baby until we figure out what to do with it. 62 00:02:36,174 --> 00:02:38,427 - Dee, you're helping me. - What? No, I'm not. 63 00:02:39,636 --> 00:02:40,762 You see what's happening here? 64 00:02:40,846 --> 00:02:41,888 Do you see this? 65 00:02:42,347 --> 00:02:44,558 Family values in this country are going down the toilet, 66 00:02:44,641 --> 00:02:46,018 and it's because of people like you. 67 00:02:46,101 --> 00:02:49,813 Men and women raising a child together is a proven system, 1,000 years old. 68 00:02:49,896 --> 00:02:52,190 There are parental roles that need to be filled here, right? 69 00:02:52,274 --> 00:02:54,651 Otherwise, the kid winds up roaming the streets, 70 00:02:54,735 --> 00:02:55,902 having unprotected sex 71 00:02:55,986 --> 00:02:57,612 - with multiple partners… - Mmm-hmm. 72 00:02:57,696 --> 00:03:00,991 …sharing needles, and contracting the HIV virus, and it's all your fault. 73 00:03:01,074 --> 00:03:02,659 Are you happy, Dee? Is this what you wanted? 74 00:03:02,743 --> 00:03:04,911 You just gave this baby full-blown AIDS. 75 00:03:14,588 --> 00:03:16,423 What the hell are these scrubs doing, dude? 76 00:03:16,506 --> 00:03:17,591 They're activists. 77 00:03:17,674 --> 00:03:20,719 They're sifting through the trash looking for recyclable materials. 78 00:03:20,844 --> 00:03:22,888 Recycling. What a waste. 79 00:03:22,971 --> 00:03:24,014 Frank. 80 00:03:24,097 --> 00:03:26,016 We are trying to make a difference. 81 00:03:28,060 --> 00:03:30,896 You see? He has no problem not callin' me "dad." 82 00:03:32,564 --> 00:03:34,983 Man, where can I get one of those recycle bags? 83 00:03:35,067 --> 00:03:36,360 Get lost, narc. 84 00:03:37,319 --> 00:03:38,320 Excuse me? 85 00:03:39,780 --> 00:03:43,116 What we're doing is completely legal, so why don't you just leave us alone? 86 00:03:43,367 --> 00:03:45,535 No, I'm not a cop. I just wanna help out. 87 00:03:45,619 --> 00:03:46,995 Sure you do. 88 00:03:47,079 --> 00:03:48,663 I saw you pull up in that range rover. 89 00:03:48,747 --> 00:03:50,082 Is everything okay, Sage? 90 00:03:50,248 --> 00:03:52,042 Yeah. No, everything's fine. I was just explaining 91 00:03:52,125 --> 00:03:53,835 to your friend that I… I want to help you guys out. 92 00:03:53,919 --> 00:03:56,213 Listen, bro. I know your type. 93 00:03:56,296 --> 00:03:59,591 Straight-edge, mainline, weekend warrior comin' down here 94 00:03:59,674 --> 00:04:02,886 in your cashmere sweater with your moussed-up, hair-sprayed coif. 95 00:04:03,512 --> 00:04:05,138 This isn't just a hobby for us. 96 00:04:05,514 --> 00:04:08,809 So why don't you take your phony, suburban, half-assed bullshit 97 00:04:09,351 --> 00:04:10,352 someplace else? 98 00:04:17,109 --> 00:04:19,277 I'll take that, hippie. 99 00:04:20,779 --> 00:04:22,406 Hey, Frank! Frank! 100 00:04:22,489 --> 00:04:23,490 Frank! 101 00:04:30,789 --> 00:04:33,125 Dude, do you believe this thing, man? It's a… 102 00:04:36,253 --> 00:04:37,629 Charlie! Charlie, get down! 103 00:04:37,754 --> 00:04:40,048 Dude, it's amazing! Look at this. 104 00:04:40,132 --> 00:04:41,883 Bro, you can chop a camel right in the hump, 105 00:04:41,967 --> 00:04:44,302 and drink all of its milk right off the tip of this thing, man. 106 00:04:44,386 --> 00:04:45,887 - That is a find, man! - Bro, you can't… 107 00:04:45,971 --> 00:04:47,639 - That's spectacular. - This is an Ali Baba sword, dude. 108 00:04:47,723 --> 00:04:49,349 - Come on, you guys. Let's get out of here. - Hee-yah! 109 00:04:49,433 --> 00:04:50,600 - Look, Dennis. Look at this. - Check this… 110 00:04:50,684 --> 00:04:51,935 I don't care about that, all right? 111 00:04:52,019 --> 00:04:53,729 You guys are makin' me look like an asshole. 112 00:04:53,812 --> 00:04:54,938 I'm out here tryin' to make a difference, 113 00:04:55,022 --> 00:04:56,440 and you're over here, rummagin' around the trash 114 00:04:56,523 --> 00:04:57,983 like a couple of narcs, okay? 115 00:04:58,066 --> 00:05:00,986 You can't just come down here with your mainline, cashmere, 116 00:05:01,069 --> 00:05:03,196 mousse-coif hair spray, 117 00:05:03,280 --> 00:05:05,490 and start being like a suburban tool. 118 00:05:05,574 --> 00:05:06,783 You can't… 119 00:05:08,535 --> 00:05:09,619 - What are you saying? - Are you okay? 120 00:05:09,703 --> 00:05:11,121 - Did you even look at this? - Are you feeling all right? 121 00:05:11,204 --> 00:05:12,539 I don't know. I think I just got punked out 122 00:05:12,622 --> 00:05:13,957 by a couple of hippies. 123 00:05:14,875 --> 00:05:16,626 I got to do somethin' about this. 124 00:05:18,962 --> 00:05:21,715 - God damn, this Dumpster Baby's heavy. - No, no, it's good for your back. 125 00:05:21,798 --> 00:05:24,718 All right. We got the diapers and the wipes and the powder. 126 00:05:24,843 --> 00:05:27,471 - Shit, this raisin' babies is easy, huh? - Huh? 127 00:05:27,554 --> 00:05:28,805 Okay. I think, first things first, 128 00:05:28,889 --> 00:05:30,849 the baby smells like trash, right? Throw it in the bath. 129 00:05:32,184 --> 00:05:33,393 - Already with this? - I didn't do it. 130 00:05:33,477 --> 00:05:34,519 - Already with this? - I didn't do anything. 131 00:05:34,603 --> 00:05:36,063 I come home to a crying baby? 132 00:05:36,313 --> 00:05:38,065 - No, I didn't do anything. It's okay. - Jesus Christ. 133 00:05:38,148 --> 00:05:41,568 You know what? I'm just gonna kick back, grab a beer, and watch the Sixers, okay? 134 00:05:41,651 --> 00:05:43,779 You're not gonna help me? I thought you wanted me to do this with you. 135 00:05:43,862 --> 00:05:44,905 Dee, would it kill you to go shopping 136 00:05:44,988 --> 00:05:46,490 every once in a while? Just… We're out of beer. 137 00:05:46,573 --> 00:05:48,241 Oh, we are? No, we're not out of anything, Mac, 138 00:05:48,325 --> 00:05:49,659 - 'cause you don't live here. - Wait… 139 00:05:50,077 --> 00:05:51,244 One left. Nice. 140 00:05:51,453 --> 00:05:52,621 - Great. - Hey, 141 00:05:52,704 --> 00:05:53,705 if we're gonna raise this baby together, 142 00:05:53,789 --> 00:05:56,416 I think it's important that we at least try to make it work, so… 143 00:05:56,500 --> 00:05:59,002 When you're done with the bath, why don't you go out and get some beer, 144 00:05:59,169 --> 00:06:01,421 and, um… A pack of smokes would be good. 145 00:06:01,505 --> 00:06:02,881 Okay, we're not gonna raise anything together. 146 00:06:02,964 --> 00:06:04,424 You know why? 'Cause I said I would help you 147 00:06:04,508 --> 00:06:06,760 hang on to this dumpster baby for a couple of days 148 00:06:06,843 --> 00:06:08,053 until we figure out what else to do with it. 149 00:06:08,136 --> 00:06:09,137 - Really? - Yes. 150 00:06:09,221 --> 00:06:10,263 You're gonna raise your voice to me right now? 151 00:06:10,347 --> 00:06:11,348 I'm not raising my voice. 152 00:06:11,431 --> 00:06:12,641 Well, I'm tryin' to have a rational conversation. 153 00:06:12,724 --> 00:06:13,725 I feel like you're berating me 154 00:06:13,809 --> 00:06:14,851 - for absolutely no reason. - What? 155 00:06:14,935 --> 00:06:16,561 So, you know what? For the sake of the baby, 156 00:06:16,645 --> 00:06:18,063 I think we need some space. 157 00:06:18,146 --> 00:06:19,564 I'm gonna go out with the guys and blow off some steam. 158 00:06:19,648 --> 00:06:21,900 What? You're just gonna dump this thing on me and leave? 159 00:06:21,983 --> 00:06:23,193 You gonna guilt me into staying? 160 00:06:23,276 --> 00:06:24,736 Okay, I guess I have to stay 161 00:06:24,820 --> 00:06:26,822 for the sake of Dumpster Baby. But I will tell you what. 162 00:06:26,905 --> 00:06:28,532 I'm not gonna stand here and be berated. 163 00:06:28,865 --> 00:06:29,866 I'm going to bed. 164 00:06:37,874 --> 00:06:40,043 - My God, I can't… - Charlie. 165 00:06:40,168 --> 00:06:42,879 Would you just please lay there and go to sleep? 166 00:06:42,963 --> 00:06:44,172 I can't sleep, dude. It's impossible. 167 00:06:44,339 --> 00:06:46,049 My mind's goin' like, a mile a minute here. 168 00:06:46,133 --> 00:06:47,300 Stop thinkin' about it. 169 00:06:47,384 --> 00:06:48,510 - I'm not your father. - No. 170 00:06:48,593 --> 00:06:50,387 - Now go to sleep. - It's not that. 171 00:06:50,470 --> 00:06:53,015 I'm thinkin' about something completely different. 172 00:06:54,016 --> 00:06:57,310 - It's the trash, isn't it? - It's the sweet, sweet trash. 173 00:06:57,602 --> 00:06:59,771 I mean, man, we found some amazing shit out there today. 174 00:06:59,855 --> 00:07:00,856 The kind of shit 175 00:07:00,939 --> 00:07:03,066 I didn't think you could find in the trash, you know? 176 00:07:03,150 --> 00:07:06,153 I'm just goin' nuts thinkin' about what else is out there. 177 00:07:06,236 --> 00:07:08,196 Frank, there's ordinary guys just like you and me 178 00:07:08,280 --> 00:07:10,115 - goin' through everyone else's trash. - They don't appreciate it. 179 00:07:10,240 --> 00:07:12,451 People don't appreciate their trash, Frank. 180 00:07:15,579 --> 00:07:17,080 Let's go get the flashlights. 181 00:07:19,958 --> 00:07:21,626 So I scale this tree. 182 00:07:21,752 --> 00:07:23,295 I mean, this is a big tree too, right? 183 00:07:23,420 --> 00:07:25,213 I get to the top of it. I find the nest. This is… 184 00:07:25,297 --> 00:07:26,631 This is baby bluebirds. 185 00:07:26,923 --> 00:07:28,258 They're starving to death. 186 00:07:28,383 --> 00:07:29,968 So, I regurgitate my lunch, 187 00:07:30,719 --> 00:07:32,763 - and I nourish the entire flock. - Wow. 188 00:07:32,846 --> 00:07:34,097 - Like… - Well, well, well. 189 00:07:34,181 --> 00:07:37,184 - Check it out, babe. The narc is back. - Mmm. 190 00:07:37,267 --> 00:07:38,310 Hey, uh, Sage… 191 00:07:38,393 --> 00:07:41,813 I thought about what you said, and I think you were right, man. 192 00:07:41,897 --> 00:07:44,858 I was half-assing it. But I'm not gonna half-ass it anymore. 193 00:07:45,067 --> 00:07:47,652 I'm gonna devote myself completely to the cause. 194 00:07:47,819 --> 00:07:49,446 Look, bro. Just 'cause you come in here 195 00:07:49,529 --> 00:07:51,573 with your Birkenstocks and your Phish T-shirt 196 00:07:51,656 --> 00:07:53,158 doesn't mean you're devoted. 197 00:07:53,283 --> 00:07:54,826 Means you're a total poser. 198 00:07:56,328 --> 00:07:57,621 Wow. Um… 199 00:07:58,830 --> 00:08:01,541 You know what, man? I'm just gonna go, then, I guess. 200 00:08:01,625 --> 00:08:05,712 You know, I'll take my Birkenstocks, and my Phish T-shirt, and my 201 00:08:06,254 --> 00:08:08,090 - kind bud with me. - What? 202 00:08:09,674 --> 00:08:11,593 Did you just say you had kind bud? 203 00:08:11,927 --> 00:08:13,595 Kind… Yeah. 204 00:08:13,678 --> 00:08:15,681 I mean, you know, I just have, like… 205 00:08:16,264 --> 00:08:17,641 This much. 206 00:08:19,101 --> 00:08:21,478 And look at this. It's a little ray gun, like. 207 00:08:21,561 --> 00:08:22,854 Oh, that's nice, man. 208 00:08:22,938 --> 00:08:24,439 Look at this thing right here. 209 00:08:24,523 --> 00:08:26,441 - Put this in a plastic bag and, boom! - Oh, yeah. 210 00:08:26,525 --> 00:08:28,485 - Shower radio, buddy. - Oh, baby. 211 00:08:29,194 --> 00:08:30,987 - Unbelievable. We're on a roll. - Here's… 212 00:08:31,071 --> 00:08:33,073 Look at this. We wrap stuff in this. 213 00:08:33,657 --> 00:08:36,034 Look. We can wrap it all up. 214 00:08:36,159 --> 00:08:37,327 All right. 215 00:08:37,411 --> 00:08:39,371 Electrics. Electrics! 216 00:08:41,248 --> 00:08:42,958 Whoa… A sneaker. 217 00:08:43,041 --> 00:08:44,543 - What size? - 14. 218 00:08:44,668 --> 00:08:46,253 Throw it in the pile, baby. 219 00:08:46,503 --> 00:08:47,629 Crash in the pile. 220 00:08:47,713 --> 00:08:49,589 All right, Charlie. Isn't this great? 221 00:08:49,798 --> 00:08:52,259 We go right to the source! Forget about the dump. 222 00:08:52,342 --> 00:08:53,385 - Yeah. Screw the dump, man. - Yeah. 223 00:08:53,468 --> 00:08:54,761 It's right in your backyard, dude. 224 00:08:54,845 --> 00:08:55,846 This is it. 225 00:08:56,304 --> 00:08:57,431 What's that? What's that? What's that? 226 00:08:57,514 --> 00:08:58,682 It's another coat, man. 227 00:08:58,765 --> 00:09:00,600 - Ooh, can I have it? - No. 228 00:09:00,726 --> 00:09:02,686 - Well, you already got one. - Frank, use your head. 229 00:09:02,769 --> 00:09:05,147 This is the coat that's gonna protect my other coat. 230 00:09:05,230 --> 00:09:06,231 Come on, man. 231 00:09:07,816 --> 00:09:09,192 Oh, when you're right, you're right. 232 00:09:09,276 --> 00:09:10,736 - Look at that. - Yeah, baby. You'll find one. 233 00:09:10,819 --> 00:09:12,029 If you keep diggin', 234 00:09:12,112 --> 00:09:13,238 you're gonna find one of these. 235 00:09:13,363 --> 00:09:15,073 Oh, you got to be kiddin' me. 236 00:09:15,198 --> 00:09:16,783 Eh? Oh, hello. 237 00:09:17,075 --> 00:09:18,869 Look who it is, huh? 238 00:09:18,952 --> 00:09:22,414 The girl who ruined my life by fallin' in love with my best friend 239 00:09:22,539 --> 00:09:24,583 and havin' sex with this guy right here. 240 00:09:24,708 --> 00:09:26,585 - How you doin'? - Gross. 241 00:09:26,710 --> 00:09:28,336 And gross to you. And you know what? 242 00:09:28,420 --> 00:09:30,047 I don't know what you're doing. I don't want to know. 243 00:09:30,130 --> 00:09:32,132 Go and do it in somebody else's dumpster, okay? 244 00:09:32,215 --> 00:09:34,634 Yeah. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on a second. 245 00:09:34,718 --> 00:09:35,719 What do you got in those? 246 00:09:36,344 --> 00:09:38,013 Coffee cups and food scraps. 247 00:09:39,222 --> 00:09:40,349 Yeah, we'll take them. 248 00:09:40,432 --> 00:09:41,433 Hand them over. 249 00:09:43,226 --> 00:09:44,561 I don't know why it's cranky, okay? 250 00:09:44,644 --> 00:09:46,938 Well, maybe he's hungry. All right? What are your thoughts on nursing it? 251 00:09:47,022 --> 00:09:49,441 I haven't slept in three days. I don't have any thoughts anymore. 252 00:09:49,566 --> 00:09:52,110 You know, raising a child is not nearly as fun as I thought it'd be. 253 00:09:52,486 --> 00:09:55,572 Huh? What if we put it back where we found it? 254 00:10:00,285 --> 00:10:01,328 Oh, my God. 255 00:10:01,453 --> 00:10:04,748 That is the cutest little baby I've ever seen. 256 00:10:04,831 --> 00:10:05,832 What's his name? 257 00:10:06,583 --> 00:10:08,377 - Uh… His name is… - It's… 258 00:10:08,460 --> 00:10:10,796 - D.B. - D.B. 259 00:10:12,214 --> 00:10:15,092 Oh… He could be a Gerber baby. He could be in commercials. 260 00:10:19,346 --> 00:10:21,723 - I have an idea. - I'm three steps ahead of you. 261 00:10:21,807 --> 00:10:24,226 - We need to make Dumpster Baby a star. - Exactly. 262 00:10:24,309 --> 00:10:25,560 This is exactly what I'm talkin' about. 263 00:10:25,644 --> 00:10:26,645 We can't put it back 264 00:10:26,728 --> 00:10:27,729 - into a corrupt system. - No… 265 00:10:27,813 --> 00:10:28,814 We have an opportunity 266 00:10:28,897 --> 00:10:31,316 - to give it a real future here. - Yes, by making it a star. 267 00:10:31,400 --> 00:10:33,276 And who have better lives than child stars? 268 00:10:33,360 --> 00:10:35,487 - Nobody. - Nobody. Rich, famous… They have it all. 269 00:10:35,570 --> 00:10:37,155 Oh, my God. They're the happiest people on earth. 270 00:10:37,781 --> 00:10:40,992 D.B., my main man, you got tossed into the right dumpster. 271 00:10:46,289 --> 00:10:48,834 Brenda, I'm not gonna waste any more of your time than I have to. 272 00:10:48,959 --> 00:10:51,628 We've got meetings with agents all over town. 273 00:10:51,795 --> 00:10:53,422 Can you make D.B. a star? 274 00:10:53,755 --> 00:10:57,259 Well, I'm sorry to say, but in today's commercial world, 275 00:10:57,342 --> 00:10:59,928 there's just no room for another white baby actor. 276 00:11:00,011 --> 00:11:01,555 There's an influx already. 277 00:11:01,805 --> 00:11:02,806 White babies don't sell. 278 00:11:02,889 --> 00:11:04,558 White babies just aren't selling right now. 279 00:11:04,641 --> 00:11:06,601 Question. Who is selling, Brenda? 280 00:11:06,768 --> 00:11:08,145 Well, the Latino market 281 00:11:08,228 --> 00:11:10,105 is the fastest growing demographic in the country. 282 00:11:10,188 --> 00:11:11,606 Great. So, Mexicans are selling. 283 00:11:11,690 --> 00:11:13,191 - Oh, well, D.B. can play Mexican. - Yeah. 284 00:11:13,275 --> 00:11:14,943 D.B. could definitely be a Mexican. 285 00:11:15,027 --> 00:11:17,529 We get him some pistols. He fires them off like crazy. He does… 286 00:11:17,612 --> 00:11:18,780 Do the jumpin' thing. 287 00:11:18,864 --> 00:11:20,157 - Watch this. - He does the Mexican jumpin' bean. 288 00:11:22,743 --> 00:11:23,952 - Isn't he cute? - We get him a little thing 289 00:11:24,036 --> 00:11:25,078 - with the chips. - He could sell chips. 290 00:11:25,203 --> 00:11:27,205 And he can dip the chips into the nacho cheese. 291 00:11:27,289 --> 00:11:28,582 - It's perfect. It's perfect. - It's hilarious. 292 00:11:28,874 --> 00:11:30,584 For all we know, he is Mexican. 293 00:11:30,834 --> 00:11:32,085 - 'Cause here's the thing. - Oh. 294 00:11:32,169 --> 00:11:33,420 - We've got… - Tell them the thing. 295 00:11:33,503 --> 00:11:35,589 Look. I can't really get into the specifics of the whole thing, 296 00:11:35,672 --> 00:11:38,508 - but we've got no idea who D.B.'s dad is. - We don't know who the dad is. 297 00:11:38,592 --> 00:11:39,676 It isn't me. 298 00:11:39,801 --> 00:11:43,263 I'm sorry, but your son just does not look Latino. 299 00:11:43,680 --> 00:11:44,681 Oh. Well… 300 00:11:45,265 --> 00:11:46,266 I mean, that… 301 00:11:46,516 --> 00:11:48,518 - It's a bit of a disappointment for us… - That makes me sad. 302 00:11:48,602 --> 00:11:51,897 Yeah, because we're truly tryin' to give him a future. 303 00:11:52,022 --> 00:11:53,482 Is there anything that we can do? 304 00:11:54,024 --> 00:11:57,027 Well, not unless you can change the color of this baby's skin. 305 00:12:00,280 --> 00:12:01,281 Let me get this straight. 306 00:12:01,406 --> 00:12:04,076 You wanna put your baby into a tanning bed. 307 00:12:04,743 --> 00:12:05,744 That's correct. 308 00:12:05,869 --> 00:12:07,871 I'm sorry. That's against the law. 309 00:12:07,954 --> 00:12:10,207 Look, pal, we are well aware of the law, okay? 310 00:12:10,290 --> 00:12:11,458 And we don't wanna jam you up here. 311 00:12:11,541 --> 00:12:13,668 We just wanna put him in there for a couple of minutes. 312 00:12:13,752 --> 00:12:15,253 - Just to get a base. - Just to get a base. 313 00:12:15,379 --> 00:12:17,339 We'll sign whatever waivers, or whatever you need us to do. 314 00:12:17,422 --> 00:12:18,590 So let us cook him for a couple of minutes, 315 00:12:18,673 --> 00:12:19,674 and we'll be out of your hair. 316 00:12:19,758 --> 00:12:22,094 I am feeling compelled to call the authorities. 317 00:12:22,177 --> 00:12:23,178 Oh, are you? 318 00:12:23,261 --> 00:12:25,472 Well, then why don't we take our business elsewhere? 319 00:12:25,555 --> 00:12:26,640 I sense some judgment 320 00:12:26,723 --> 00:12:28,392 in your voice, sir, and I don't appreciate it. 321 00:12:28,475 --> 00:12:30,727 You could have helped change this child's life forever. 322 00:12:30,811 --> 00:12:31,812 You chose not to. 323 00:12:31,937 --> 00:12:34,272 - That's on you. - I can live with that. 324 00:12:34,398 --> 00:12:35,607 Come on, D.B… 325 00:12:35,774 --> 00:12:37,859 I guess the road to stardom is paved with hard knocks 326 00:12:37,943 --> 00:12:39,403 and orange assholes. 327 00:12:41,488 --> 00:12:43,115 Trees are people too. 328 00:12:43,240 --> 00:12:44,491 Save this tree. 329 00:12:44,616 --> 00:12:46,159 These developer pigs 330 00:12:46,284 --> 00:12:47,786 are gonna tear down this tree. 331 00:12:47,911 --> 00:12:51,790 So, tonight we will hold a candlelight vigil in protest. 332 00:12:51,915 --> 00:12:53,625 Hey, Sage, Asriel. 333 00:12:53,750 --> 00:12:55,752 - Can we commune for a moment? - Yeah. What's up? 334 00:12:55,836 --> 00:12:58,463 Well, listen. I don't wanna be putting out any negative vibrations 335 00:12:58,547 --> 00:13:01,717 or anything like that, but I think we're going about this the wrong way. 336 00:13:01,800 --> 00:13:03,385 Thanks, but, uh, we got it. 337 00:13:03,468 --> 00:13:05,387 Okay, why don't we hear him out, Sage? 338 00:13:06,179 --> 00:13:08,432 Thanks, Asriel… Well, listen. 339 00:13:08,515 --> 00:13:10,267 While I think lighting a couple of candles, 340 00:13:10,350 --> 00:13:13,520 and singin' a few sweet jams sounds like a really good time, 341 00:13:13,603 --> 00:13:15,272 it's not gonna stop a bulldozer. 342 00:13:15,731 --> 00:13:17,983 Somebody needs to step up and be a hero here. 343 00:13:18,233 --> 00:13:20,819 So, I'm thinkin', I would chain myself to that tree. 344 00:13:21,486 --> 00:13:23,655 And that way, if they wanna kill that tree, 345 00:13:24,614 --> 00:13:25,866 they got to kill me first. 346 00:13:26,324 --> 00:13:28,201 That is so brave of you, Dennis. 347 00:13:28,326 --> 00:13:29,953 - Is it? - Wait. 348 00:13:30,120 --> 00:13:33,707 If anyone is gonna chain themselves to anything, it's gonna be me. 349 00:13:33,790 --> 00:13:35,125 But it's Dennis' idea. 350 00:13:35,208 --> 00:13:36,668 No, wait, Asriel. He's right. 351 00:13:37,210 --> 00:13:38,378 Maybe it should be him. 352 00:13:38,628 --> 00:13:40,422 Right. I'm the one in charge here. 353 00:13:40,547 --> 00:13:41,840 - Right. You're the one in charge. - Right. 354 00:13:41,923 --> 00:13:43,008 - Right. - Right. 355 00:13:43,091 --> 00:13:44,217 Mountain, go get some chains. 356 00:13:44,301 --> 00:13:46,136 No, wait. Hold off on that, Mountain. 357 00:13:47,220 --> 00:13:48,847 I brought some. 358 00:13:50,223 --> 00:13:51,767 Charlie, we got to stop. We got to stop. 359 00:13:51,850 --> 00:13:53,685 No. Two more stops, Frank. Let's keep it moving. 360 00:13:53,769 --> 00:13:54,936 Let's drop it off at base camp. 361 00:13:55,020 --> 00:13:56,271 - No. No base camp. - No, no… 362 00:13:56,355 --> 00:13:57,522 - We got to keep movin', Frank. - No, it's fallin'. 363 00:13:57,606 --> 00:13:58,607 March! 364 00:13:58,690 --> 00:14:00,108 Oh! Do not lose that. 365 00:14:00,192 --> 00:14:01,943 - Do not lose that. - It's just a bottle. 366 00:14:02,027 --> 00:14:03,278 All right, I think we got to stop. 367 00:14:03,362 --> 00:14:04,613 We got to stop at the apartment. 368 00:14:04,696 --> 00:14:07,449 - No, dude. There's no time for that, man! - We got to drop some stuff off. 369 00:14:07,532 --> 00:14:08,950 All right, fine. We'll make it quick. 370 00:14:09,034 --> 00:14:10,160 All right. 371 00:14:12,204 --> 00:14:14,539 Charlie, maybe we should get rid of some of this shit. 372 00:14:14,664 --> 00:14:16,792 - What? - Yeah. I mean… 373 00:14:16,875 --> 00:14:18,335 - What'd you say, get rid of it? - Yeah. 374 00:14:18,418 --> 00:14:19,586 Frank! 375 00:14:20,087 --> 00:14:22,339 - Look at this. Huh? - Yeah. 376 00:14:22,422 --> 00:14:23,548 This… This… 377 00:14:23,882 --> 00:14:25,258 - Look at that, bro! - Yeah. Yeah. 378 00:14:25,342 --> 00:14:26,968 This, here's our future, man. 379 00:14:27,052 --> 00:14:29,304 People are just throwin' this away. "Get rid of it," dude? 380 00:14:29,388 --> 00:14:30,722 Frank, we start gettin' rid of this, 381 00:14:30,806 --> 00:14:32,808 we're gonna be just like the wasters out there. 382 00:14:32,891 --> 00:14:34,267 Look, hey… Guess what. 383 00:14:34,643 --> 00:14:37,646 - Somebody else is gonna find it. - You're right. You're right, you're right. 384 00:14:37,729 --> 00:14:39,064 Well, where are we gonna sleep? 385 00:14:46,530 --> 00:14:48,865 You sure you still wanna do this? 386 00:14:49,074 --> 00:14:51,576 Mountain, this is what it's all about. 387 00:14:52,035 --> 00:14:54,246 Me and my girl, side by side, 388 00:14:54,746 --> 00:14:56,248 savin' a life, 389 00:14:56,373 --> 00:14:57,958 bringin' in the dawn together. 390 00:14:58,041 --> 00:14:59,459 I mean, come on! 391 00:15:00,210 --> 00:15:01,211 Looks like it's gonna rain. 392 00:15:01,294 --> 00:15:02,921 It does look like it's gonna rain. 393 00:15:03,213 --> 00:15:04,589 Have you seen Asriel? 394 00:15:04,881 --> 00:15:05,882 No. 395 00:15:07,300 --> 00:15:09,052 Wonder where she is. 396 00:15:10,303 --> 00:15:12,222 Riders on the storm 397 00:15:14,433 --> 00:15:19,938 Tonight, we cross the plane of reality into the dimension of no place or time. 398 00:15:21,273 --> 00:15:22,607 Open your mouth. 399 00:15:25,444 --> 00:15:27,529 Become the journey. 400 00:15:28,238 --> 00:15:30,615 Like a dog without a bone 401 00:15:31,033 --> 00:15:32,534 What are we doin', man? 402 00:15:32,617 --> 00:15:33,952 It's pourin' rain out here! 403 00:15:34,077 --> 00:15:35,412 We're actin' like animals. 404 00:15:35,495 --> 00:15:36,913 But we got to stick together, Frank, 405 00:15:36,997 --> 00:15:39,166 - if we're gonna make it, man. - Yeah, let's stick together, Charlie. 406 00:15:39,249 --> 00:15:41,251 - All right. Let's use our heads. - What are we gonna do? 407 00:15:41,334 --> 00:15:42,753 - We got to get out of this rain. - Yeah. 408 00:15:43,086 --> 00:15:44,337 Where are we gonna go? 409 00:15:47,340 --> 00:15:48,675 We could get in that dumpster. 410 00:15:50,302 --> 00:15:52,137 I'm not above that. Let's go. 411 00:15:52,637 --> 00:15:55,307 Asriel! 412 00:15:55,974 --> 00:15:59,144 Where are you? 413 00:16:18,455 --> 00:16:19,456 Can you give me a bite of that, dude? 414 00:16:19,539 --> 00:16:20,540 Mmm. Yeah. 415 00:16:20,624 --> 00:16:23,001 I'm starvin', you know. 416 00:16:23,126 --> 00:16:25,754 Charlie, I'm really sorry that I banged your girlfriend. 417 00:16:25,837 --> 00:16:28,298 Oh, bro, you got to stop talkin' about that, dude. 418 00:16:28,382 --> 00:16:30,550 I'm also sorry that I didn't get the blood test. 419 00:16:30,634 --> 00:16:34,262 But I know… I'm 100% positive that I am not your dad. 420 00:16:34,346 --> 00:16:37,182 Dude, how can you be 100% positive, dude? How do you know? 421 00:16:37,265 --> 00:16:40,519 Your mother and I were gonna keep this a secret, but… 422 00:16:42,354 --> 00:16:44,439 After we made love, she did get pregnant, 423 00:16:45,315 --> 00:16:46,692 but she had an abortion. 424 00:16:48,193 --> 00:16:50,696 - Really? - Yeah. Yeah. 425 00:16:51,029 --> 00:16:52,656 Are you sure she went through with it, dude? 426 00:16:53,031 --> 00:16:54,199 'Cause maybe she didn't tell you. 427 00:16:54,324 --> 00:16:55,992 I mean, she probably went right from the clinic 428 00:16:56,076 --> 00:16:59,996 and banged some guy and got knocked up, because your mother was a giant whore. 429 00:17:00,205 --> 00:17:01,248 Oh, you know what, dude? 430 00:17:01,331 --> 00:17:03,166 - I don't believe you, Frank, all right? - It's hard to take. 431 00:17:03,250 --> 00:17:05,419 Just… Oh, my God. You're a liar, man. 432 00:17:05,877 --> 00:17:08,171 Girl, ya gotta love your man 433 00:17:09,881 --> 00:17:11,174 Where are you goin', Charlie? 434 00:17:11,675 --> 00:17:12,926 To find out the truth! 435 00:17:14,761 --> 00:17:15,887 Charlie! 436 00:17:15,971 --> 00:17:17,973 Make him understand 437 00:17:19,224 --> 00:17:20,684 Yeah 438 00:17:28,775 --> 00:17:31,611 - Frank doesn't know the truth. - I knew it. 439 00:17:31,695 --> 00:17:35,282 All right. You didn't have an abortion, you just told him you did. I get that. 440 00:17:35,365 --> 00:17:38,577 No. I had an abortion. It just didn't take. 441 00:17:40,996 --> 00:17:42,330 What does that mean? 442 00:17:42,497 --> 00:17:45,167 It means, you survived it. 443 00:17:45,250 --> 00:17:47,419 You survived the abortion. 444 00:17:47,502 --> 00:17:49,755 What the hell are you talking about, Mom? 445 00:17:49,838 --> 00:17:51,465 We went to one of those clinics… 446 00:17:51,548 --> 00:17:53,550 One of those underground clinics, 447 00:17:53,633 --> 00:17:55,469 because Frank didn't want to spend a lot of money. 448 00:17:55,552 --> 00:17:57,804 - Yeah. - And I had the procedure, 449 00:17:57,888 --> 00:17:59,931 - and then they told me you were dead… - Okay. 450 00:18:00,015 --> 00:18:01,516 And then three months later, 451 00:18:01,600 --> 00:18:03,769 you popped out, happy as a clam! 452 00:18:05,103 --> 00:18:07,856 Sweetie, I had to keep it a secret from Frank. 453 00:18:08,065 --> 00:18:10,275 I never wanted the abortion in the first place. 454 00:18:10,650 --> 00:18:11,777 But he was married, 455 00:18:11,860 --> 00:18:14,488 and I knew, if he found out, he would have forced me 456 00:18:14,613 --> 00:18:16,948 to get rid of you once and for all. 457 00:18:17,199 --> 00:18:18,533 He would have made me 458 00:18:18,658 --> 00:18:20,410 throw you in a dumpster. 459 00:18:23,580 --> 00:18:24,790 Oh… 460 00:18:24,873 --> 00:18:25,874 My… 461 00:18:26,541 --> 00:18:27,584 God. 462 00:18:30,003 --> 00:18:31,254 Nope. His skin needs to be darker, Dee. 463 00:18:31,338 --> 00:18:32,381 Yeah, I know. 464 00:18:32,464 --> 00:18:34,091 We're just gonna paint this bronzing lotion on him. 465 00:18:34,174 --> 00:18:35,217 Shoe polish. 466 00:18:35,300 --> 00:18:36,343 - Shoe polish? - Shoe polish. 467 00:18:36,426 --> 00:18:38,095 Shoe polish on a baby? You're such an idiot. 468 00:18:38,178 --> 00:18:39,930 That's gonna look stupid and smell like shit. 469 00:18:40,013 --> 00:18:41,056 We'll see. 470 00:18:41,807 --> 00:18:42,808 Where's D.B? 471 00:18:43,225 --> 00:18:44,393 My door's open! 472 00:18:45,227 --> 00:18:46,812 - Did he get kidnapped? - Somebody came in and took him? 473 00:18:46,895 --> 00:18:48,855 There's a note. There's a note! 474 00:18:49,231 --> 00:18:52,734 "'Taked' baby. Meet at later bar, night or day sometime." 475 00:18:54,403 --> 00:18:55,529 Charlie. 476 00:18:55,654 --> 00:18:58,573 Feast your eyes on this! 477 00:18:58,657 --> 00:19:01,034 Oh, my God, Charlie. Where did you get a baby? 478 00:19:01,118 --> 00:19:03,578 I think you know good and well where I got this baby, now don't you? 479 00:19:03,870 --> 00:19:05,038 What the hell are you talking about? 480 00:19:05,122 --> 00:19:08,834 I'm talkin' about you and Frank throwin' your love child 481 00:19:08,917 --> 00:19:10,502 here in the dumpster behind Paddy's Pub! 482 00:19:10,585 --> 00:19:11,920 What, did you think I wouldn't find out? 483 00:19:12,003 --> 00:19:13,922 Well, I did. Yeah. Yeah! 484 00:19:14,005 --> 00:19:16,341 What you might not know, though, is that this little baby of yours 485 00:19:16,425 --> 00:19:18,176 also happens to be my half brother. 486 00:19:19,094 --> 00:19:21,847 Charlie, the incident with Frank happened three months ago. 487 00:19:21,930 --> 00:19:23,432 It takes nine months to make a baby, 488 00:19:23,557 --> 00:19:26,018 so you can just give me the baby and stop screaming. 489 00:19:26,101 --> 00:19:27,185 You know, there was a time 490 00:19:27,269 --> 00:19:28,478 where I would've helped you raise this little 491 00:19:28,562 --> 00:19:32,733 dumpster baby brother of mine like a son. But that's gone now, 'cause you ruined it! 492 00:19:32,899 --> 00:19:34,568 You threw your babies away! 493 00:19:34,901 --> 00:19:36,778 And you threw your swords away! 494 00:19:36,903 --> 00:19:39,281 You threw your golf clubs and your tasty treats! 495 00:19:39,448 --> 00:19:40,449 And you know what? 496 00:19:40,574 --> 00:19:43,410 I found them. And I'm gonna raise all of them! 497 00:19:44,661 --> 00:19:46,538 Get me the number for child services. 498 00:19:50,083 --> 00:19:52,627 Hey, Sage, buddy. How are you, man? 499 00:19:52,919 --> 00:19:53,920 How are you feelin'? 500 00:19:54,004 --> 00:19:55,255 I did it. 501 00:19:55,338 --> 00:19:56,548 I saved the tree. 502 00:19:56,840 --> 00:19:58,050 You sure did, man. 503 00:19:58,467 --> 00:19:59,926 You saved that tree. Wow! 504 00:20:00,010 --> 00:20:01,553 I got to say, man, I'm really impressed. 505 00:20:01,636 --> 00:20:03,221 I don't think I could've done what you did here today. 506 00:20:03,305 --> 00:20:05,057 - I'm a hero. - You are. You're a hero. 507 00:20:05,140 --> 00:20:06,475 - Yup. - Come here. 508 00:20:06,558 --> 00:20:07,893 Come here. Come with me. 509 00:20:07,976 --> 00:20:09,227 Man, it is a good day to be alive. 510 00:20:09,311 --> 00:20:12,564 It's a good day to be alive, isn't it? 511 00:20:12,814 --> 00:20:13,815 Okay, guys. 512 00:20:14,107 --> 00:20:15,275 She's all yours. 513 00:20:20,155 --> 00:20:21,490 You might wanna see this. 514 00:20:29,456 --> 00:20:30,832 I banged your girlfriend. 515 00:20:32,042 --> 00:20:33,543 What time did he say he's gonna meet us? 516 00:20:33,627 --> 00:20:35,879 Uh, "Later bar, night or day sometime." 517 00:20:36,129 --> 00:20:37,130 - What does that mean? - I don't know. 518 00:20:37,255 --> 00:20:39,508 Hey, any of you guys seen that Ali Baba sword 519 00:20:39,591 --> 00:20:41,468 - that Charlie had? - What? 520 00:20:41,551 --> 00:20:43,804 The little shit dumped me in a dumpster last night, 521 00:20:43,887 --> 00:20:45,222 and I'm takin' all his stuff. 522 00:20:45,305 --> 00:20:46,431 It's every man for himself. 523 00:20:46,515 --> 00:20:48,225 I got to find that Ali Baba sword. 524 00:20:48,308 --> 00:20:50,852 Pour me a shot there, Dee. I am the man. 525 00:20:51,186 --> 00:20:52,771 Why are you so chipper? 526 00:20:52,854 --> 00:20:54,940 I got punked out by this peace activist. 527 00:20:55,023 --> 00:20:57,359 So what I did is, I infiltrated his organization, 528 00:20:57,484 --> 00:20:58,485 I banged his girlfriend, and then I… 529 00:20:58,610 --> 00:20:59,778 - Hey, Frank! - Interrupt me. 530 00:20:59,861 --> 00:21:02,280 - You recognize this young man here? - All right. 531 00:21:02,489 --> 00:21:04,658 Or should I say, "Hey, Dad?" 532 00:21:04,825 --> 00:21:06,827 Yeah. That's right, everybody. 533 00:21:06,910 --> 00:21:09,454 Who would like to hear a mind-blowing story? 534 00:21:09,579 --> 00:21:10,747 Nobody. Give us back our baby 535 00:21:10,831 --> 00:21:12,499 - so, we can paint it. - Oh, you're gonna paint it, huh? 536 00:21:12,582 --> 00:21:15,669 Be careful painting it, 'cause you'll be painting my brother. 537 00:21:15,836 --> 00:21:18,505 But I guess you already knew that, didn't you, Dad? 538 00:21:18,588 --> 00:21:20,340 What the hell are you talkin' about, Charlie? 539 00:21:20,424 --> 00:21:23,343 I'm talkin' about you and the Waitress dumpin' your baby in a dumpster! 540 00:21:23,427 --> 00:21:25,762 And the abortion you tried to make my mom have? 541 00:21:25,846 --> 00:21:28,140 Well, guess what, Frankie? It didn't take. 542 00:21:28,223 --> 00:21:29,975 I'm an abortion survivor, Dad! 543 00:21:30,100 --> 00:21:31,935 - I survived the abortion, Dad! - Stop! 544 00:21:32,019 --> 00:21:35,313 First of all, it takes nine months to have a baby. 545 00:21:35,397 --> 00:21:37,399 That is not my baby. 546 00:21:37,816 --> 00:21:41,486 Second of all, your mother is feedin' you a line of crap! 547 00:21:41,945 --> 00:21:43,989 Holy shit. You guys kept the Ali Baba sword? 548 00:21:44,072 --> 00:21:45,574 Give me the sword! That's the sword I want. 549 00:21:45,657 --> 00:21:46,700 Back off, man. 550 00:21:50,495 --> 00:21:51,496 Stop grabbin' it!