1 00:00:01,039 --> 00:00:02,666 It's got a rubber handle. That'll keep me grounded. 2 00:00:02,749 --> 00:00:05,251 I'm pretty sure you have to be standing on rubber. 3 00:00:05,335 --> 00:00:08,004 - Well, the bottoms of my shoes are rubber. - Oh, no! You know what it is? 4 00:00:08,088 --> 00:00:09,756 You can't be standing on the ground at all. 5 00:00:09,839 --> 00:00:12,050 - Maybe jump up into midair and do it. - Hmm? 6 00:00:12,133 --> 00:00:14,969 Yeah. If you jump into the air and grab a live wire, 7 00:00:15,053 --> 00:00:16,638 you won't get electrocuted. 8 00:00:16,721 --> 00:00:19,432 But then if you land on the ground and you're still holding that wire, 9 00:00:19,516 --> 00:00:22,394 you'll be blown to bits. I saw it in Tango & Cash. 10 00:00:22,519 --> 00:00:24,229 So I'm supposed to risk my life based on something 11 00:00:24,312 --> 00:00:26,147 that you saw in Tango & Cash? 12 00:00:27,232 --> 00:00:28,775 - Kurt Russell, I think… - I'm gonna jam this thing 13 00:00:28,942 --> 00:00:30,110 with a screwdriver, all right? 14 00:00:30,193 --> 00:00:31,653 The rubber handle will ground me. And I'll be safe. 15 00:00:31,736 --> 00:00:33,571 - All right. Give it a shot. - Okay. 16 00:00:33,697 --> 00:00:35,073 - It's all set to scrape… - Oh, my God! 17 00:00:35,156 --> 00:00:36,241 Holy shit! 18 00:00:36,324 --> 00:00:38,368 Whoa, whoa, whoa! What the hell are you doing? 19 00:00:38,451 --> 00:00:39,995 - It exploded. - You're making it worse! 20 00:00:40,078 --> 00:00:41,913 You gotta pay somebody to fix this. 21 00:00:41,997 --> 00:00:43,915 No! I'm tired of spending my money 22 00:00:43,999 --> 00:00:46,042 every time something goes wrong here. 23 00:00:46,126 --> 00:00:48,044 We can't fix it! It's too dangerous! 24 00:00:48,128 --> 00:00:50,422 - It scared the shit out of me, man. - Well, get Charlie to do it. 25 00:00:50,505 --> 00:00:51,589 He won't go near it. 26 00:00:51,673 --> 00:00:53,425 He's already been electrocuted, like, 500 times. 27 00:00:53,550 --> 00:00:55,093 Yeah, man. I think he's starting to catch on to that. 28 00:00:55,218 --> 00:00:56,594 Dennis, go get me a harness 29 00:00:56,720 --> 00:00:58,513 'cause I'll have to be swinging in the air to do this. 30 00:00:58,596 --> 00:01:00,140 - Are you kidding me? - I told you. 31 00:01:00,223 --> 00:01:01,683 Did you get the flashlights? 32 00:01:01,766 --> 00:01:04,144 Forget about the flashlights! Check these bad boys out! 33 00:01:04,227 --> 00:01:05,437 - They fell off the back of a truck. - Huh? 34 00:01:05,562 --> 00:01:07,814 - Nice grab. - But what about the flashlights? 35 00:01:07,897 --> 00:01:09,858 Uh, I'm sorry. Someone wasn't paying attention, right? 36 00:01:09,941 --> 00:01:12,110 - Free speakers! Free speakers for the bar! - Speakers! 37 00:01:12,193 --> 00:01:13,403 Mac, let's plug these bad boys in. 38 00:01:13,528 --> 00:01:14,738 - Yeah! - We don't have any electricity! 39 00:01:14,863 --> 00:01:16,823 - That's why we needed the flashlight. - Careful! 40 00:01:16,906 --> 00:01:18,742 I'm sorry. I didn't… 41 00:01:18,825 --> 00:01:20,577 - Holy shit. - What is that? 42 00:01:22,537 --> 00:01:24,122 - Oh, my God. - Whoa. 43 00:01:24,205 --> 00:01:25,790 That's a big bag of drugs. 44 00:01:25,874 --> 00:01:27,083 This is not good, dude. 45 00:01:27,167 --> 00:01:28,251 Somebody's gonna be looking for those drugs. 46 00:01:28,335 --> 00:01:30,378 Relax, dude. They're gonna be shit out of luck 'cause no one… 47 00:01:30,462 --> 00:01:32,630 No one saw us take the speakers. Did they? 48 00:01:32,714 --> 00:01:35,216 - See us take… - No. 49 00:01:35,300 --> 00:01:37,886 There you have it. Look, let's not worry or panic. 50 00:01:37,969 --> 00:01:40,138 This is… This is a lot of drugs. 51 00:01:40,221 --> 00:01:42,599 But, like, what's the worst that could happen? 52 00:02:17,676 --> 00:02:18,677 Gotta get rid of it. 53 00:02:18,760 --> 00:02:20,387 Yeah. Drugs are bad news. Let's get rid of it. 54 00:02:20,470 --> 00:02:23,306 - Throw it in the garbage. - You can't do that, a kid could find it. 55 00:02:23,390 --> 00:02:24,683 - Right. - Burn it. 56 00:02:24,808 --> 00:02:26,226 Well, then we're dealing with a fume situation. 57 00:02:26,309 --> 00:02:27,352 Yeah. You gotta wear masks and… 58 00:02:27,477 --> 00:02:28,561 It's a whole thing… 59 00:02:28,645 --> 00:02:30,063 It's a whole production. It's a big production. 60 00:02:30,146 --> 00:02:31,314 Then bury it! 61 00:02:31,398 --> 00:02:33,149 No, see. Now we're back to the kids again. 62 00:02:33,233 --> 00:02:35,485 - Kids run with shovels, playing in dirt. - Absolutely. 63 00:02:35,568 --> 00:02:37,696 - And then one of them's gonna… - Okay. Call the police. 64 00:02:37,779 --> 00:02:40,448 What, are we gonna just solve society's drug problem? 65 00:02:40,532 --> 00:02:41,783 - You know what I mean? - Is that on us? 66 00:02:41,866 --> 00:02:42,951 - No! - Is that on us now? 67 00:02:43,034 --> 00:02:44,494 The community is still going down the toilet. 68 00:02:44,577 --> 00:02:46,871 So I think what you're saying, Sweet Dee, is that we could use 69 00:02:46,955 --> 00:02:49,499 - the unsolvable drug problem in society… - Mmm-hmm. 70 00:02:49,582 --> 00:02:52,085 …to fix the solvable light problem in our bar. 71 00:02:52,210 --> 00:02:53,420 - Yes. - I hear you. 72 00:02:53,545 --> 00:02:55,505 We're saying we're gonna do the drugs, 73 00:02:55,588 --> 00:02:57,173 - and then try and fix all the lights. - No. 74 00:02:57,257 --> 00:02:58,675 - Charlie didn't understand that. - That's asinine. 75 00:02:58,758 --> 00:03:00,635 - You want to rewind? - Yeah, we're gonna flip the drugs. 76 00:03:00,719 --> 00:03:03,513 Make a bunch of money. Use that money to fix the electricity. 77 00:03:03,596 --> 00:03:05,515 All right. Well, both ways work. I kinda like my way… 78 00:03:05,598 --> 00:03:07,058 - Great plan. - Your way's terrible. 79 00:03:07,183 --> 00:03:08,393 - I'm in. Let's sell these drugs. - You're not in. 80 00:03:08,518 --> 00:03:10,395 And you're not gonna sell them. We'll do it, Charlie. 81 00:03:10,520 --> 00:03:12,063 Because we found the drugs. 82 00:03:12,188 --> 00:03:13,606 - And you're bossy. - Very bossy. 83 00:03:13,690 --> 00:03:15,483 - I'm not bossy. - Scumbags! 84 00:03:15,567 --> 00:03:17,569 Frank, come on, man. Look, we're trying to get some money 85 00:03:17,652 --> 00:03:19,654 to fix the lights in our bar because you won't give it to us. 86 00:03:19,738 --> 00:03:23,867 Back in my day, only the biggest pieces of shit dealt drugs. 87 00:03:23,950 --> 00:03:25,744 - We're not gonna deal drugs. - Yeah, right. 88 00:03:25,827 --> 00:03:28,163 - We're gonna flip it once. - A one-time flip. 89 00:03:28,246 --> 00:03:29,998 - Yeah. - We'll go to that shady guy, Bingo. 90 00:03:30,081 --> 00:03:32,125 - Oh, Bingo. - We'll say "Here's a pile of drugs. 91 00:03:32,250 --> 00:03:34,044 - "Give us some money." Then… - Oh, no, no. 92 00:03:34,127 --> 00:03:36,296 You don't go to Bingo. Bingo is my contact. 93 00:03:36,421 --> 00:03:38,340 I'm sorry. I don't think you can call dibs 94 00:03:38,423 --> 00:03:40,258 - on a shady people-smuggler. - You can't do that. 95 00:03:40,383 --> 00:03:42,594 Just do not mention my name! 96 00:03:42,719 --> 00:03:45,263 - My God. - Relax. No one's gonna mention your name. 97 00:03:46,097 --> 00:03:47,891 Hey, Bingo. Frank sent us. 98 00:03:48,391 --> 00:03:51,895 Frank, huh? I'm gonna skin that son of a bitch and wear his face. 99 00:03:51,978 --> 00:03:53,688 - What's up? - We're trying… 100 00:03:53,772 --> 00:03:55,273 - Don't look at me. - Excuse me? 101 00:03:55,357 --> 00:03:56,399 Look up. Up. 102 00:03:56,483 --> 00:03:57,567 - Okay. - Is this good? 103 00:03:57,651 --> 00:03:59,486 That's fine. Now speak. 104 00:03:59,569 --> 00:04:01,905 Uh, okay. Uh, well, listen, Bingo. 105 00:04:01,988 --> 00:04:04,949 We got a bucket of nose clams fresh from the sea. 106 00:04:05,033 --> 00:04:09,120 Sweet, delicious nose clams that are looking for a home if you follow me. 107 00:04:09,204 --> 00:04:10,538 - Nose clams? - No. I don't follow you. 108 00:04:10,622 --> 00:04:12,749 I don't know what you're talking about. 109 00:04:12,874 --> 00:04:16,336 It's not confusing. Just everybody settle down. 110 00:04:16,419 --> 00:04:18,088 These are the kind of nose clams 111 00:04:18,171 --> 00:04:20,340 that make you want to dance the night away. 112 00:04:20,757 --> 00:04:22,342 I don't get what the hell you're talking about. 113 00:04:22,425 --> 00:04:24,386 - I don't even know what you're saying. - It's so obvious! 114 00:04:24,469 --> 00:04:26,763 You know what? It's not obvious. Now you're being too vague. 115 00:04:26,846 --> 00:04:28,473 You're talking about dancing clams. 116 00:04:28,598 --> 00:04:31,393 - What's gonna make you dance? - These are the kind of nose clams 117 00:04:31,476 --> 00:04:33,478 that you crush up into a line of white powder 118 00:04:33,603 --> 00:04:36,272 and you snort them up through your nose. And they make you high. 119 00:04:36,356 --> 00:04:39,275 You use a dollar bill or a straw to do it. They come from Colombia. 120 00:04:39,359 --> 00:04:41,945 They're illegal. And they rhyme with "propane." 121 00:04:42,028 --> 00:04:43,989 Perfect. You found a perfect medium ground there. 122 00:04:44,072 --> 00:04:45,824 - So you wanna sell me cocaine? - Yes! 123 00:04:45,907 --> 00:04:47,158 Why didn't you just come out and say that? 124 00:04:47,242 --> 00:04:48,702 - Instead of dancing around it. - That is so tacky. 125 00:04:48,785 --> 00:04:51,454 - We talked about it on the way over. - It's not tacky. 126 00:04:51,538 --> 00:04:55,291 That is the kindergarten behavior of drug dealing. Do you want them or not? 127 00:04:55,458 --> 00:04:56,668 - Yeah, of course I do. - Oh, great. 128 00:04:56,793 --> 00:04:57,877 - Well, here you go. - Thank you. 129 00:04:58,003 --> 00:04:59,504 - Eyes, boom. - Yeah. 130 00:05:03,174 --> 00:05:05,635 Oh! Oh! 131 00:05:05,719 --> 00:05:07,846 Youse two. We need to talk to youse. Huh? 132 00:05:08,304 --> 00:05:09,806 Shit. Are you guys gangsters? 133 00:05:09,889 --> 00:05:10,974 Shut up! 134 00:05:11,057 --> 00:05:13,226 Ah, owe me a coke. Listen. 135 00:05:13,309 --> 00:05:15,562 Rumor has it that somebody who works at this bar, 136 00:05:15,645 --> 00:05:17,647 found a certain somethin' that belongs to us. 137 00:05:17,814 --> 00:05:19,816 A certain somethin' which may or may not 138 00:05:19,899 --> 00:05:21,693 have fallen off a certain truck. 139 00:05:21,776 --> 00:05:24,696 And the certain somebody that we know thinks they saw that certain someone 140 00:05:24,779 --> 00:05:27,073 pick it up and take it back to a certain bar, 141 00:05:27,157 --> 00:05:30,618 which may or may not be the place that we happen to be or not be 142 00:05:30,702 --> 00:05:33,246 talkin' to a couple of certain somebodies right this very second. 143 00:05:33,330 --> 00:05:34,581 - Capisce? - Huh? 144 00:05:36,875 --> 00:05:38,752 Fellas, we're about six beers' deep 145 00:05:38,835 --> 00:05:40,587 so I think you're gonna have to 146 00:05:40,712 --> 00:05:43,006 be a little bit more clear 'cause I didn't get that last part. 147 00:05:43,089 --> 00:05:45,175 I… I missed out on the whole thing to be honest with you. 148 00:05:45,258 --> 00:05:47,552 I was confused by it. I'm very confused by the… 149 00:05:47,677 --> 00:05:50,347 I was confused by the whole thing if I'm being honest. 150 00:05:50,430 --> 00:05:54,267 Look, why don't you just return what belongs to us? 151 00:05:54,351 --> 00:05:58,772 Or pay us the 25 G's that it's worth, and we'll be square. 152 00:05:58,855 --> 00:06:00,523 Youse got until Friday, huh? 153 00:06:00,732 --> 00:06:01,941 What happens on Friday? 154 00:06:02,150 --> 00:06:03,693 Oh… 155 00:06:03,777 --> 00:06:06,071 Well, Friday is the day 156 00:06:06,154 --> 00:06:10,742 that we may or may not be forced to chop your limbs off 157 00:06:10,825 --> 00:06:16,456 and distribute them evenly amongst your friends and your family. 158 00:06:16,539 --> 00:06:17,791 And that's Friday. 159 00:06:19,292 --> 00:06:21,169 - Friday. - Okay. 160 00:06:21,252 --> 00:06:24,464 Well, thanks, gentlemen. That's… That's very… A very clear message. 161 00:06:24,547 --> 00:06:26,758 - We'll certainly get on that right away. - Yeah. 162 00:06:27,092 --> 00:06:29,094 Okay. That's much appreciated. 163 00:06:29,219 --> 00:06:30,637 Uh, good day to youse. 164 00:06:30,762 --> 00:06:33,973 - And good day to youse. Come on. - Huh? 165 00:06:34,057 --> 00:06:35,642 Chewin' in my ear all the time. 166 00:06:35,725 --> 00:06:37,227 - Let's go already. - Come on. Come on. Come on. 167 00:06:37,644 --> 00:06:38,978 Holy shit! 168 00:06:42,732 --> 00:06:46,528 Guess who sold the drugs and we can fix the lights now 169 00:06:46,611 --> 00:06:48,113 - The lights are fixed. - Yeah, man. 170 00:06:48,196 --> 00:06:49,698 No shit. How'd you do that? 171 00:06:49,781 --> 00:06:50,865 We got bigger problems than that, dude. 172 00:06:50,949 --> 00:06:53,410 The drugs that you sold, they belong to the mob. 173 00:06:53,493 --> 00:06:55,036 - What? - Yeah, they saw you guys. 174 00:06:55,120 --> 00:06:57,580 Guys, real-life actual gangsters. It was pretty cool. 175 00:06:57,664 --> 00:06:59,499 - They came to the bar. They threatened us. - It was not cool! 176 00:06:59,624 --> 00:07:01,668 Look! The point is, we're gonna give them the money 177 00:07:01,793 --> 00:07:03,003 that you got from Bingo. So it's… 178 00:07:03,169 --> 00:07:05,588 Cool. And then maybe we can keep a little for ourselves too. 179 00:07:05,672 --> 00:07:06,756 - How much did you get? - Perfect. 180 00:07:06,840 --> 00:07:10,010 - Oh, dude, a one, a two, a $300! - Hello. 181 00:07:10,135 --> 00:07:12,303 You guys, those drugs were worth 25 grand! 182 00:07:12,429 --> 00:07:14,431 Oh, shit! Are you serious? 183 00:07:14,514 --> 00:07:15,724 - Yes! - Now, see now? I told you. 184 00:07:15,807 --> 00:07:17,392 - I asked for more money. - What? 185 00:07:17,475 --> 00:07:18,727 - Yes, I did. - No, you didn't! 186 00:07:18,810 --> 00:07:22,063 I was using dead presidents as a cover. You didn't get that? 187 00:07:22,147 --> 00:07:25,275 He said to the man he wanted many thousands of green people 188 00:07:25,358 --> 00:07:26,651 from history times. 189 00:07:26,735 --> 00:07:28,611 Oh, my God. We are so screwed. 190 00:07:28,695 --> 00:07:30,613 - How are we gonna get 25 grand by Friday? - I get that. 191 00:07:33,908 --> 00:07:36,119 Don't look at me. You made this bed. 192 00:07:36,202 --> 00:07:38,913 You're sleeping in it. This is a life lesson for you. 193 00:07:38,997 --> 00:07:40,999 This is not the time to be throwing down life lessons, all right? 194 00:07:41,082 --> 00:07:43,877 We are going to get whacked off by a bunch of scary Italian guys. 195 00:07:43,960 --> 00:07:45,045 Did they say they were gonna whack us off? 196 00:07:45,170 --> 00:07:46,713 They implied they wanted to whack us all off! 197 00:07:46,796 --> 00:07:49,674 Nobody's gonna get whacked off today, okay? Listen. 198 00:07:49,799 --> 00:07:52,093 We're gonna take the money. We'll go get our drugs back from Bingo. 199 00:07:52,177 --> 00:07:54,512 We'll give it to the mob and pretend none of this ever happened. 200 00:07:54,637 --> 00:07:56,056 - And this time, I'll do the talking! - Okay. 201 00:07:56,181 --> 00:07:57,640 Just keep my name out of it. 202 00:07:58,016 --> 00:07:59,893 Frank said to tell you to sell us back our drugs. 203 00:08:00,143 --> 00:08:02,354 - Okay. No problem. - Good. Good. 204 00:08:02,479 --> 00:08:03,897 - Great. - Excellent. 205 00:08:03,980 --> 00:08:05,690 - Five thousand dollars. - What? 206 00:08:05,774 --> 00:08:08,526 - Oh, boy! - An hour ago, you gave us $300 for 'em. 207 00:08:08,610 --> 00:08:10,362 - Yeah, man. - I don't recall that. 208 00:08:10,445 --> 00:08:12,155 - Come on! - All right. 209 00:08:12,238 --> 00:08:13,907 What can we get for $300 then? 210 00:08:14,324 --> 00:08:17,118 You want an exotic bird? 211 00:08:17,202 --> 00:08:18,495 If you're gonna play this game, 212 00:08:18,578 --> 00:08:19,788 we need to buy something from you 213 00:08:19,871 --> 00:08:22,707 that we can sell back to other people at a higher price. 214 00:08:22,832 --> 00:08:24,668 Okay. Oxycontin. 215 00:08:24,751 --> 00:08:27,087 It's a very popular pill these days. 216 00:08:27,170 --> 00:08:28,880 I happen to have a shitload of it. 217 00:08:29,089 --> 00:08:30,423 - How much? - $1,200. 218 00:08:30,548 --> 00:08:32,926 - Oh, boy. Wow. - That's gonna… 219 00:08:33,051 --> 00:08:35,428 - Bingo! Wow. - Goodness gracious with this guy. 220 00:08:35,553 --> 00:08:37,764 - If it's not one thing it's another thing. - Oh, okay. 221 00:08:37,847 --> 00:08:39,057 Think about it this way. 222 00:08:39,140 --> 00:08:40,975 If we split it, it's only a few hundred dollars each. 223 00:08:41,059 --> 00:08:43,728 - Great. - I'll just go grab cash from my money tree 224 00:08:43,812 --> 00:08:46,356 - that I have planted. - I know a leprechaun with a pot of gold. 225 00:08:46,439 --> 00:08:47,816 He lives at the end of my street. 226 00:08:47,899 --> 00:08:49,567 Maybe I'll go to a bank and say, "Hello. 227 00:08:49,651 --> 00:08:51,403 - "Do I have an account here?" - Call Donald Trump! 228 00:08:52,112 --> 00:08:55,949 How do three men in their 30s not have $800 between them? 229 00:08:58,118 --> 00:09:00,620 - They're… - The economy is in shambles. 230 00:09:00,704 --> 00:09:03,623 - Have you seen the marketplace right now? - The NASDAQ! 231 00:09:03,748 --> 00:09:04,958 - Dow Jones! - It's up then down. 232 00:09:05,083 --> 00:09:08,253 Stop talking, God damn it! Fine! I'll do it! 233 00:09:08,336 --> 00:09:10,797 - I'm not getting my money back, am I? - Give us money. 234 00:09:12,924 --> 00:09:13,925 Boom. 235 00:09:14,009 --> 00:09:15,385 What am I supposed to do with that? 236 00:09:15,468 --> 00:09:17,971 - You tell us. - Bingo said you knew how to sell drugs. 237 00:09:18,096 --> 00:09:21,016 I told you not to involve me! Did you mention my name? 238 00:09:21,099 --> 00:09:23,351 - First thing we did. - You gonna harp on it all day? 239 00:09:23,435 --> 00:09:25,770 God damn it! The guy's gonna skin me alive. 240 00:09:25,854 --> 00:09:27,814 - He is gonna skin you alive. - He mentioned something about it. 241 00:09:27,897 --> 00:09:30,233 Will you just pay the mob off so we don't have to sell these pills? 242 00:09:30,316 --> 00:09:32,777 Dennis, I am not using any more of my money! 243 00:09:32,861 --> 00:09:35,822 - The mob is gonna kill us, man! - Look, if I cave on this, 244 00:09:35,905 --> 00:09:38,325 I'm gonna be bailing you guys out for the rest of my life. 245 00:09:38,408 --> 00:09:40,076 - So… - I'm putting my foot down on this one. 246 00:09:40,160 --> 00:09:42,245 You bitches gotta earn your own money! 247 00:09:42,329 --> 00:09:44,331 Fine! Whatever! It doesn't matter. 248 00:09:44,456 --> 00:09:47,459 - 'Cause, seeing as how I'm the boss… - You're not the boss. 249 00:09:47,542 --> 00:09:49,878 Yes, I am. I've come up with an excellent idea. 250 00:09:49,961 --> 00:09:52,630 Frank, you are gonna get us into that country club that you used to belong to. 251 00:09:52,714 --> 00:09:54,466 We're gonna sell the pills there. 252 00:09:54,549 --> 00:09:56,760 - That'd be a good place to sell the pills. - Yes. Thank you very much. 253 00:09:56,843 --> 00:10:00,013 You can't make no $25,000 from that amount of pills. 254 00:10:00,096 --> 00:10:01,139 How long you got? 255 00:10:01,222 --> 00:10:02,515 - Till Friday. - Mmm-mmm. 256 00:10:02,599 --> 00:10:05,602 You'll have to turn a trick or two. Go into prostitution. 257 00:10:05,935 --> 00:10:08,563 You are disgusting! How could you suggest… 258 00:10:08,646 --> 00:10:10,565 I am absolutely not doing that! 259 00:10:10,648 --> 00:10:12,192 I wasn't talking about you. 260 00:10:12,275 --> 00:10:14,611 Guys at those country clubs get hotter broads than you. 261 00:10:14,694 --> 00:10:15,737 - I would think, yeah. - Yeah. 262 00:10:15,820 --> 00:10:20,367 I was saying the male escort is really hard to come by. 263 00:10:20,450 --> 00:10:22,452 I'm picking up what you're putting down. 264 00:10:22,535 --> 00:10:23,787 - I'll do it. - Oh… 265 00:10:23,870 --> 00:10:26,790 Uh, Charlie, you're not quite cut from the right cloth. 266 00:10:26,873 --> 00:10:28,708 - What? - Okay. Make it me. 267 00:10:28,833 --> 00:10:31,211 Mac, you're too low class. All those women are gonna think 268 00:10:31,336 --> 00:10:32,712 they're gonna catch somethin' from you. 269 00:10:32,879 --> 00:10:34,547 - They are. - They will. 270 00:10:34,714 --> 00:10:36,341 I was thinking about Dennis. 271 00:10:37,008 --> 00:10:38,927 Now, Frank, will any of these women 272 00:10:39,010 --> 00:10:40,428 be attractive in any way? 273 00:10:40,720 --> 00:10:42,389 - Probably not. - Then I'm not going to do it. 274 00:10:42,472 --> 00:10:43,598 Let's sell some drugs. 275 00:10:43,682 --> 00:10:44,683 - I got it. - Why are you grabbing it? 276 00:10:44,766 --> 00:10:46,309 - Very grabby. Really? - Get out. 277 00:10:51,815 --> 00:10:54,401 Okay. I think we gotta look for old ladies with lots of big jewelry. 278 00:10:54,484 --> 00:10:57,070 - They got the deepest pockets. - Ah, that's my girl. 279 00:10:57,362 --> 00:10:59,739 Dennis, I think you should unbutton this button too. 280 00:10:59,823 --> 00:11:02,325 - Show a little chest. - Frank, I know what you're trying to do. 281 00:11:02,409 --> 00:11:04,995 I'm not gonna be a whore. Just drop it. All right? 282 00:11:05,829 --> 00:11:07,998 Holy shit. Did you guys see that midget 283 00:11:08,123 --> 00:11:09,290 dressed like a lawn jockey? 284 00:11:09,624 --> 00:11:11,918 - That's a jockey, Charlie. - Do what, now? 285 00:11:12,002 --> 00:11:13,294 That's a real jockey. 286 00:11:14,045 --> 00:11:16,297 The ones that ride on the horses… Forget it! 287 00:11:16,381 --> 00:11:18,299 - Really? - Wait. They have horses here? 288 00:11:18,383 --> 00:11:19,592 There's a racetrack next door, dude. 289 00:11:20,218 --> 00:11:22,137 - Bye-bye. - What? No! 290 00:11:22,220 --> 00:11:23,430 - Where are you going, man? - Where are you going? 291 00:11:23,596 --> 00:11:24,848 All right, whatever! Let's split up. 292 00:11:24,931 --> 00:11:26,975 - I call Dennis. - No. I'm not gonna be a whore, Frank. 293 00:11:27,183 --> 00:11:30,103 You're already a whore. Why not make some money at it? 294 00:11:30,186 --> 00:11:31,855 You're just gonna try and make me bang old ladies. 295 00:11:31,938 --> 00:11:33,106 And then you're gonna have me move on to dudes. 296 00:11:33,273 --> 00:11:35,734 - I just wanna hang out. - We're wasting time. Dee! Let's split up! 297 00:11:35,817 --> 00:11:36,901 Come on! 298 00:11:39,696 --> 00:11:42,574 Oh, that's good, huh? You like that? 299 00:11:42,741 --> 00:11:43,992 It's a real beaut, huh? 300 00:11:44,284 --> 00:11:45,827 Holy shit. You can talk? 301 00:11:46,036 --> 00:11:47,537 - What? - That is great. 302 00:11:47,620 --> 00:11:51,291 I would've figured if anything, your voice would be like super high. 303 00:11:51,374 --> 00:11:52,500 Well, good for you. 304 00:11:52,625 --> 00:11:55,295 She normally doesn't take to strangers. She must like you, huh? 305 00:11:55,378 --> 00:11:58,089 Yeah. Wow. She seems like a real nice horse. 306 00:11:58,173 --> 00:12:00,967 Actually, she kicked the last stable boy's brains in. 307 00:12:01,051 --> 00:12:03,136 - He takes his food through a straw now. - I bet. 308 00:12:03,345 --> 00:12:06,431 Hey, you wouldn't be interested in taking his job, would ya? 309 00:12:07,265 --> 00:12:08,433 I'd be very interested. 310 00:12:08,516 --> 00:12:10,643 You have any qualms about picking up shit? 311 00:12:10,894 --> 00:12:12,729 Terrific. Terrific. 312 00:12:12,812 --> 00:12:16,316 Usually, we'd use a shovel for that. But to each his own, I guess. 313 00:12:16,399 --> 00:12:18,193 - Not me. - Why don't you come and meet the fellas? 314 00:12:18,276 --> 00:12:20,403 All right. 315 00:12:20,612 --> 00:12:22,447 Oh, right. Good work. 316 00:12:26,660 --> 00:12:29,829 Okay. Now, there's only one thing that these rich old men understand. 317 00:12:29,913 --> 00:12:33,875 And that is money. So I am gonna play the role of a high-powered executive. 318 00:12:33,958 --> 00:12:36,169 - Mmm. - You are going to be my secretary, Linda. 319 00:12:36,252 --> 00:12:39,798 Ooh! No. No. I will be your business partner. 320 00:12:39,923 --> 00:12:41,716 Dee, these guys are old school, okay? 321 00:12:41,800 --> 00:12:43,885 They don't like women's rights. Now, don't give me any lip! 322 00:12:44,427 --> 00:12:47,097 Okay, Linda. The first thing I need you to do is get Jameson on the phone 323 00:12:47,222 --> 00:12:50,225 and tell him I don't need his $650,000 investment. 324 00:12:50,308 --> 00:12:53,645 - He can shove it right back up his ass. - Oh, I got a better idea, Bob. 325 00:12:53,728 --> 00:12:55,897 - How about you do it? - What's that? 326 00:12:56,022 --> 00:12:58,692 Yeah. I think you should get Jameson on the phone for me. 327 00:12:59,067 --> 00:13:00,735 Well, why would I do that, Linda? 328 00:13:00,819 --> 00:13:02,612 You're my secretary and a woman. 329 00:13:02,696 --> 00:13:04,698 What do you know about investing? 330 00:13:04,781 --> 00:13:05,991 Oh, I'm sorry, Bob. 331 00:13:06,074 --> 00:13:08,576 Remind me again what we're having Jameson invest in? 332 00:13:09,744 --> 00:13:12,789 Jameson is investing in new technologies. 333 00:13:12,872 --> 00:13:14,290 Really? Which ones? 334 00:13:14,416 --> 00:13:15,959 - Lasers. - Lasers! 335 00:13:16,084 --> 00:13:18,253 - Yep. - That is adorable. 336 00:13:18,336 --> 00:13:19,838 Lasers, Linda! 337 00:13:19,963 --> 00:13:21,339 Who wants to buy some drugs? 338 00:13:26,469 --> 00:13:29,597 Hey, man. You workin'? 339 00:13:30,265 --> 00:13:33,351 - Excuse me? - Don't play dumb with me, hermano. 340 00:13:33,435 --> 00:13:35,603 I know a gigolo when I see one. 341 00:13:35,687 --> 00:13:38,189 No, look, I'm not a gigolo, all right? 342 00:13:38,273 --> 00:13:39,858 - For real? - Yeah. 343 00:13:40,483 --> 00:13:43,695 A good-looking guy like you could do very well in my business. 344 00:13:43,778 --> 00:13:45,947 Thanks. But I'm not really into banging old ladies. 345 00:13:46,323 --> 00:13:47,449 Bang them? 346 00:13:48,450 --> 00:13:51,995 No, bro. You got it all wrong, man. These women are classy. 347 00:13:52,078 --> 00:13:54,497 Yeah, they just want someone to be nice to them. 348 00:13:54,581 --> 00:13:55,832 Flirt a little bit. That's it. 349 00:13:56,166 --> 00:13:57,292 Really? 350 00:13:57,375 --> 00:13:59,502 - I wouldn't have to bang these ladies? - No. 351 00:13:59,627 --> 00:14:02,172 Bro, it's all fancy dinners, exotic vacations. 352 00:14:02,297 --> 00:14:05,050 These ladies have so much cash, man. It's the life. 353 00:14:06,217 --> 00:14:07,302 You should really think about it. 354 00:14:07,886 --> 00:14:09,304 You could make a killing here, bro. 355 00:14:10,972 --> 00:14:12,140 Huh. 356 00:14:14,684 --> 00:14:17,103 Hey. 357 00:14:17,437 --> 00:14:18,938 - Nice work. - Hey, thanks, man. 358 00:14:19,022 --> 00:14:20,690 - Oh, that's yours. - Thank you very much. 359 00:14:20,774 --> 00:14:23,109 - Yours. Thank you. - Hey, man. You said $20. 360 00:14:23,777 --> 00:14:25,779 Take it or leave it. 361 00:14:25,862 --> 00:14:27,238 Hey, whatever, homes. 362 00:14:30,533 --> 00:14:31,951 Puta pendejo. 363 00:14:43,213 --> 00:14:47,050 Man, these guys are crazy. I can't believe they bought all my pills. 364 00:14:47,300 --> 00:14:48,468 Ah, you know what they say. 365 00:14:48,593 --> 00:14:50,679 Nobody parties like a jockey! 366 00:14:50,762 --> 00:14:52,514 I was not familiar with that expression, buster. 367 00:14:52,597 --> 00:14:53,848 I didn't even know you guys could talk. 368 00:14:53,932 --> 00:14:56,142 So you want that job or not? 369 00:14:56,226 --> 00:14:57,560 I tell you what. 370 00:14:57,644 --> 00:14:59,646 I got a little something I gotta straighten out with the mafia. 371 00:14:59,729 --> 00:15:01,022 - You know how that goes, right? - Oh, sure. 372 00:15:01,106 --> 00:15:02,941 But when that's done, maybe. 373 00:15:03,024 --> 00:15:04,985 Because there's something about that horse, buster. 374 00:15:05,068 --> 00:15:06,569 You know, it's like we looked at each other. 375 00:15:06,653 --> 00:15:07,904 And then there was eye contact. 376 00:15:07,988 --> 00:15:09,948 And I was looking at the horse, and the horse was looking at me. 377 00:15:10,031 --> 00:15:12,158 And then it hit me, I think, maybe, 378 00:15:12,242 --> 00:15:13,952 I was a centaur in my past life. 379 00:15:14,244 --> 00:15:17,789 Well, something tells me you probably were never half-man, half-horse. 380 00:15:17,872 --> 00:15:19,124 But, hell, what do I know? 381 00:15:19,207 --> 00:15:22,002 All I know is you got a great attitude. 382 00:15:22,085 --> 00:15:24,546 So come on, you old son of a gun, 383 00:15:24,629 --> 00:15:27,048 and let buster do a line off your boner. 384 00:15:32,470 --> 00:15:33,555 No. 385 00:15:39,227 --> 00:15:41,604 Uh, garzon, why don't you hook up the young lady here 386 00:15:41,688 --> 00:15:44,190 with one of your best strawberry daiquiris? 387 00:15:45,191 --> 00:15:48,111 All righty. Thanks. 388 00:15:48,194 --> 00:15:50,947 Hey, how's it going, man? Uh, did you sell any of your pills? 389 00:15:51,031 --> 00:15:53,533 Uh, no. Actually, I'm kind of working a different angle here, Charlie. 390 00:15:53,742 --> 00:15:55,452 - I sold all of mine. - Okay, that's… 391 00:15:55,535 --> 00:15:58,204 Lawn jockeys are crazy people, man. Did you know that? 392 00:15:58,621 --> 00:16:00,123 Charlie, you're kinda cramping my style. 393 00:16:00,206 --> 00:16:01,333 I'm trying to drum up a little business here. 394 00:16:01,458 --> 00:16:02,459 You know what I'm saying? 395 00:16:02,584 --> 00:16:05,754 - Do you know what I'm saying? - I think I was a centaur in my past life. 396 00:16:05,920 --> 00:16:07,130 It totally occurred to me. 397 00:16:07,213 --> 00:16:08,923 What makes you think you were half-man, half-horse? 398 00:16:09,174 --> 00:16:11,968 Charlie. Come on. Out, out. He's working. 399 00:16:12,052 --> 00:16:13,595 - I'm enjoying a roll. - He's working. 400 00:16:13,803 --> 00:16:15,555 Bro, will you please get out of here? You smell like cheese. 401 00:16:15,638 --> 00:16:17,599 No, no. It's horse shit. 402 00:16:17,682 --> 00:16:19,351 Well, whatever it is, it's terrible. Okay? So… 403 00:16:19,434 --> 00:16:20,810 Let's call it what it is. It's horse shit. 404 00:16:20,935 --> 00:16:23,438 I have it all over my hands. But it's not cheese. 405 00:16:23,521 --> 00:16:25,023 The horse was eating a lot of cheese then. 406 00:16:25,106 --> 00:16:26,149 I don't know what it is. Just you stink. 407 00:16:26,274 --> 00:16:28,068 - Come on. Get up. Get up. - I don't wanna get up. 408 00:16:28,151 --> 00:16:30,028 As a matter of fact, you really don't smell that much better. 409 00:16:30,111 --> 00:16:31,529 If you could get out of here, that'd be really helpful. 410 00:16:31,613 --> 00:16:32,697 Don't talk to me that way, Dennis. 411 00:16:32,781 --> 00:16:35,325 Don't talk to me. I am your pimp. You are my ho. 412 00:16:35,408 --> 00:16:36,409 Look, dude. 413 00:16:36,868 --> 00:16:39,329 - Horses don't eat cheese. - You are ruining this! 414 00:16:39,412 --> 00:16:42,457 Will you get out of here, for the love of all that is holy on Earth! 415 00:16:42,540 --> 00:16:44,626 - You reek of cheese! - Excuse me. 416 00:16:45,043 --> 00:16:46,378 Are you the Reynolds party? 417 00:16:46,544 --> 00:16:47,712 - Yeah. - Yeah. 418 00:16:47,796 --> 00:16:49,839 We had to escort your friends off the property. 419 00:16:49,923 --> 00:16:52,592 - They're waiting for you by your car. - Oh… 420 00:16:53,426 --> 00:16:56,638 Yeah. Where? Ah, the guilty parties. 421 00:16:56,888 --> 00:16:59,265 Yeah. Yeah, Mac made a whole series of bad decisions. 422 00:16:59,349 --> 00:17:01,142 And then we got kicked out, and they stole our drugs. 423 00:17:01,226 --> 00:17:02,977 - Was he being bossy? - Yeah. He was being very bossy. 424 00:17:03,061 --> 00:17:04,104 And now we've got nothing. 425 00:17:04,187 --> 00:17:06,106 - It's not a total loss, all right? - No, no, no. 426 00:17:06,189 --> 00:17:07,232 I sold all my pills. 427 00:17:07,482 --> 00:17:09,859 - Oh! Nice. - Oh, that's awesome. 428 00:17:09,943 --> 00:17:12,696 - What about you, Dennis? - Dennis is a prostitute now. 429 00:17:12,779 --> 00:17:14,781 - Good. - No, I'm not a prostitute, okay? 430 00:17:14,864 --> 00:17:16,825 - Yes, he is. - There's no banging old ladies and dudes. 431 00:17:16,908 --> 00:17:19,494 All right? I will be providing a very important service, however, 432 00:17:19,577 --> 00:17:22,455 as what I would like to be called a handsome companion. 433 00:17:22,706 --> 00:17:24,249 - To dudes? - To guys or… 434 00:17:24,457 --> 00:17:26,084 No, not to dudes. No, hang on. 435 00:17:26,167 --> 00:17:28,920 Hold on. Hang on. To old, fancy, rich ladies 436 00:17:29,004 --> 00:17:31,297 who want to do classy, exotic, fancy things with me. 437 00:17:31,589 --> 00:17:33,466 Great. Dennis, you keep banging dudes. 438 00:17:33,550 --> 00:17:36,553 Dee, let's take Charlie's money and go buy some cocaine. 439 00:17:36,720 --> 00:17:39,139 Do you see what you're doing here with the bossiness again? 440 00:17:39,222 --> 00:17:41,307 - And the demanding? I don't appreciate it. - Ordering everyone around. 441 00:17:41,391 --> 00:17:43,101 - You're out, dude! - Oh, he's out. 442 00:17:43,184 --> 00:17:44,811 You're not kicking me out. I'm the boss of you! 443 00:17:44,894 --> 00:17:46,813 You're the only one who hasn't made any forward progress today. 444 00:17:46,896 --> 00:17:47,897 Just hang back. 445 00:17:48,023 --> 00:17:50,066 Wait. I'm supposed to put my life into your hands? 446 00:17:50,150 --> 00:17:52,736 - Leave your ego out of it. - Look, we're in some… 447 00:17:52,819 --> 00:17:55,572 Excuse me! We're in some serious hot water here 448 00:17:55,655 --> 00:17:57,615 because of you and your bossiness. 449 00:17:57,699 --> 00:17:59,993 - You should stop acting like a baby. - Go on. 450 00:18:00,118 --> 00:18:01,119 So you're gonna leave me here? 451 00:18:01,328 --> 00:18:05,582 We cannot have you around us screwing things up! 452 00:18:05,665 --> 00:18:07,167 How am I supposed to get home? 453 00:18:07,250 --> 00:18:09,794 You're supposed to walk like the rest of the Americans. 454 00:18:09,919 --> 00:18:11,379 - You walk, you know? - On their two feet! 455 00:18:11,463 --> 00:18:13,298 Walk? It's like 40 miles! 456 00:18:13,423 --> 00:18:15,884 Oh, that's why young people… 457 00:18:15,967 --> 00:18:19,262 You can't do this to me! You can't do this! 458 00:18:19,346 --> 00:18:21,973 I'm smart, and I deserve respect! 459 00:18:22,098 --> 00:18:24,100 I'm gonna get you sons of bitches! 460 00:18:28,063 --> 00:18:29,439 - Whoa! - You want to stop it already? 461 00:18:31,566 --> 00:18:34,611 It's okay. I put the parking brake on. Sorry about that, boys. 462 00:18:34,694 --> 00:18:35,820 Hey, you got our money? 463 00:18:36,321 --> 00:18:37,906 No. No, I do not have your money. 464 00:18:37,989 --> 00:18:39,783 But I think there's been a misunderstanding here. 465 00:18:39,866 --> 00:18:41,910 - And I wanna set it straight. - Proceed. 466 00:18:42,035 --> 00:18:44,746 Well, ever since your alleged "package" 467 00:18:44,829 --> 00:18:47,290 came into my bar, I may or may not 468 00:18:47,374 --> 00:18:49,209 have had absolutely nothing to do with it. 469 00:18:49,542 --> 00:18:51,169 - You did or you didn't? - I did. 470 00:18:51,378 --> 00:18:52,629 You did have something to do with it? 471 00:18:52,837 --> 00:18:55,840 No. No. I did have absolutely nothing to do with it. 472 00:18:55,924 --> 00:18:59,594 Wait, wait. You just said you did have something to do with it. 473 00:18:59,678 --> 00:19:02,681 I think I said I did have absolutely nothing to do with it. 474 00:19:02,889 --> 00:19:04,057 - But you said… - Are you sure? 475 00:19:04,182 --> 00:19:05,809 The thing is when you use a double negative, 476 00:19:05,892 --> 00:19:07,060 it becomes something completely different. 477 00:19:07,143 --> 00:19:09,688 But you know, we can get into that later. The point is this, guys. 478 00:19:09,771 --> 00:19:12,190 I want to get in on what you guys got. 479 00:19:12,273 --> 00:19:13,984 I want to dress like a track star. 480 00:19:14,067 --> 00:19:15,902 I want to wear gold shit and slick my hair back 481 00:19:15,986 --> 00:19:17,904 and grow a pompadour, you know? 482 00:19:18,196 --> 00:19:20,490 - You want to join our crew, huh? - More than anything. 483 00:19:20,657 --> 00:19:22,367 Okay, first things first. 484 00:19:22,450 --> 00:19:23,910 You gotta prove your loyalty. 485 00:19:24,202 --> 00:19:25,453 - Prove my loyalty? - Yeah. 486 00:19:25,745 --> 00:19:27,455 I want you 487 00:19:27,539 --> 00:19:29,374 - to go clean the bathrooms. - Yeah. 488 00:19:29,582 --> 00:19:31,292 - The bathrooms? - Yeah. The bathrooms. 489 00:19:32,210 --> 00:19:33,795 - Why? - 'Cause that's the first step 490 00:19:33,878 --> 00:19:35,422 in becoming a part of our crew! 491 00:19:35,630 --> 00:19:38,133 Okay. Guys, I clean a mean bathroom. 492 00:19:38,216 --> 00:19:39,759 I learned from one of my friends, Charlie. 493 00:19:39,843 --> 00:19:41,720 You'll get to know him too maybe. I'll bring him in. 494 00:19:41,803 --> 00:19:44,264 Okay. Thank you. 495 00:19:44,347 --> 00:19:45,849 - Go ahead. - Thank you. 496 00:19:46,224 --> 00:19:47,809 You gonna really let him be part of our crew? 497 00:19:48,309 --> 00:19:50,437 Hey, summer squash for brains, 498 00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:52,188 I'm gonna make him our bitch till Friday. 499 00:19:52,439 --> 00:19:54,149 - Oh, bitch boy. - Bitch boy. 500 00:19:54,232 --> 00:19:55,316 And after that? 501 00:19:56,526 --> 00:19:58,278 I wanna whack him off, irregardless.