1
00:00:05,283 --> 00:00:06,183
Hey, knock, knock.

2
00:00:06,251 --> 00:00:07,470
Oh, hi, Charlie.

3
00:00:07,590 --> 00:00:08,524
Hey, Ma.

4
00:00:08,591 --> 00:00:11,527
Listen, you're doing me a solid
offering to do this laundry, all right?

5
00:00:11,594 --> 00:00:12,361
Well, we never get to talk.

6
00:00:12,429 --> 00:00:13,196
That's why I offered.

7
00:00:13,263 --> 00:00:15,064
We don't talk, and it's good that way.

8
00:00:15,132 --> 00:00:15,898
Hello.

9
00:00:15,966 --> 00:00:16,699
Hey, Mac's here.

10
00:00:16,766 --> 00:00:17,666
He brought his laundry.

11
00:00:17,734 --> 00:00:18,701
Thanks a bundle, Mrs. Kelly.

12
00:00:18,768 --> 00:00:22,138
I got Frank's stuff, Dee's stuff, Dennis'
stuff, so you're gonna be working.

13
00:00:22,206 --> 00:00:25,641
Oh, okay, well, what I wanted to talk to you about...
Ooh, talky, talky, talky,

14
00:00:25,709 --> 00:00:26,608
talky, talky.

15
00:00:26,676 --> 00:00:27,643
You know, Mom, we're busy.

16
00:00:27,711 --> 00:00:29,111
We got a whole big day planned.

17
00:00:29,179 --> 00:00:31,547
Yeah, we got to go back to
Paddy's and polish off a couple

18
00:00:31,614 --> 00:00:33,515
beers, so it's like...
Beers, you know, but hey.

19
00:00:33,583 --> 00:00:34,483
Time is of the essence.

20
00:00:34,551 --> 00:00:36,585
We'll come back when it's
folded and good and done.

21
00:00:36,653 --> 00:00:38,054
I'd like to bring it up now.

22
00:00:38,121 --> 00:00:39,588
Um, I have cancer.

23
00:00:39,656 --> 00:00:43,525
Yeah, but I got to... I'm sorry. What?

24
00:00:43,593 --> 00:00:44,593
I have lung cancer.

25
00:00:44,661 --> 00:00:46,028
What?

26
00:00:46,096 --> 00:00:47,529
But how?

27
00:00:47,597 --> 00:00:48,731
You don't even smoke.

28
00:00:48,798 --> 00:00:53,204
Well, you know, it's just
one of those freak things.

29
00:00:53,937 --> 00:01:03,937
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com

30
00:01:16,482 --> 00:01:18,383
And then Psychic
John said that he could tell I

31
00:01:18,451 --> 00:01:20,619
was under a tremendous amount
of stress and that my heart was

32
00:01:20,686 --> 00:01:21,653
filled with sorrow.

33
00:01:21,720 --> 00:01:23,955
Now how would he have known
that if he wasn't psychic?

34
00:01:24,023 --> 00:01:26,224
I'm not giving you any
money for your dumb psychic.

35
00:01:26,292 --> 00:01:28,793
But he says I'm gonna have a
tremendous windfall of cash.

36
00:01:28,861 --> 00:01:29,861
You're losing your mind.

37
00:01:29,928 --> 00:01:31,129
You're being scammed.

38
00:01:31,197 --> 00:01:32,430
I'm losing my mind?

39
00:01:32,498 --> 00:01:36,568
How many pairs of shoes have
you lost this month, Frank?

40
00:01:36,569 --> 00:01:38,970
Three.

41
00:01:39,038 --> 00:01:39,937
Hmm?

42
00:01:40,005 --> 00:01:41,273
Four. That's not the point.

43
00:01:41,340 --> 00:01:44,543
The point is my mind is as sharp as a...
what do you call it?

44
00:01:44,610 --> 00:01:48,246
Um, it's a... Knife?

45
00:01:48,314 --> 00:01:52,184
No, uh, what you put... What you... What you...
I just don't understand why

46
00:01:52,251 --> 00:01:53,151
it's my fault.

47
00:01:53,219 --> 00:01:55,153
It's your fault because your
mom is directly responsible.

48
00:01:55,221 --> 00:01:57,155
Yeah, but we both decided to
move them in together, so you

49
00:01:57,223 --> 00:01:59,123
know, you deserve half the blame.

50
00:01:59,192 --> 00:02:01,059
You want to put half the blame on me?

51
00:02:01,126 --> 00:02:02,460
Guys, my mom has lung cancer.

52
00:02:02,528 --> 00:02:04,996
Oh, God.

53
00:02:05,064 --> 00:02:07,031
You know, geez.

54
00:02:07,099 --> 00:02:09,334
That's-that's terrible.

55
00:02:09,402 --> 00:02:11,536
What the hell was that, dude?

56
00:02:11,604 --> 00:02:12,737
That didn't sound very genuine.

57
00:02:12,805 --> 00:02:14,639
No. Sorry.

58
00:02:14,707 --> 00:02:15,973
What was I supposed to do?

59
00:02:16,041 --> 00:02:17,942
What are you... Are you kidding me?

60
00:02:18,010 --> 00:02:19,877
Are you screwing with me right now?

61
00:02:19,945 --> 00:02:20,712
No, I'm sorry.

62
00:02:20,779 --> 00:02:22,647
I think the cancer thing, for
whatever reason, is just not...

63
00:02:22,715 --> 00:02:24,482
You know, it's just not
grabbing me right now.

64
00:02:24,550 --> 00:02:25,317
Not grabbing you?

65
00:02:25,384 --> 00:02:26,184
My mom is dying!

66
00:02:26,252 --> 00:02:27,219
Okay, calm down, calm down.

67
00:02:27,286 --> 00:02:30,021
Okay, because my mom has a
doctor that can cure the cancer

68
00:02:30,089 --> 00:02:31,556
for 4,200 bucks, so no big deal.

69
00:02:31,624 --> 00:02:33,525
4,200 bucks? To cure cancer?

70
00:02:33,593 --> 00:02:35,360
That's it?

71
00:02:35,428 --> 00:02:36,561
No, I mean, that's a scam.

72
00:02:36,629 --> 00:02:37,762
That's what I was saying.

73
00:02:37,830 --> 00:02:38,963
Do you think it's a scam?

74
00:02:39,031 --> 00:02:42,200
Come on, people take advantage of old
people and scam them all the time.

75
00:02:42,268 --> 00:02:43,201
Thumbtack.

76
00:02:43,269 --> 00:02:44,202
What?

77
00:02:44,270 --> 00:02:45,169
Thumbtack.

78
00:02:45,238 --> 00:02:47,305
We were talking about things
that earlier that were sharp,

79
00:02:47,373 --> 00:02:49,207
and a thumbtack is sharp.

80
00:02:49,275 --> 00:02:50,508
Thumbtack?

81
00:02:50,576 --> 00:02:51,343
Yeah.

82
00:02:51,410 --> 00:02:53,111
All right. You see what
I'm talking about?

83
00:02:53,178 --> 00:02:55,079
People get old and then their
brains turn to mush, and then

84
00:02:55,147 --> 00:02:56,881
people come along and
take advantage of them.

85
00:02:56,949 --> 00:02:59,117
Now, Frank, give me the hundred
bucks you were excited to give

86
00:02:59,184 --> 00:03:00,252
me for my psychic.

87
00:03:00,319 --> 00:03:01,653
Oh, yeah.

88
00:03:01,721 --> 00:03:03,054
Sorry.

89
00:03:03,122 --> 00:03:04,021
Here you go.

90
00:03:04,089 --> 00:03:04,989
Thank you.

91
00:03:05,057 --> 00:03:07,359
Yeah.

92
00:03:09,795 --> 00:03:10,928
Where the hell are we?

93
00:03:10,996 --> 00:03:13,798
I mean, your mom's totally screwing
my mom again with this doctor scam.

94
00:03:13,866 --> 00:03:14,966
No, it's not a scam, Charlie.

95
00:03:15,033 --> 00:03:17,702
She's been seeing this guy for
years, and she doesn't have cancer.

96
00:03:17,770 --> 00:03:20,705
Yeah, I got to say, though, this is a
strange place for a doctor's office.

97
00:03:20,773 --> 00:03:21,939
What's this guy's name?

98
00:03:22,007 --> 00:03:23,040
Dr. Jinx.

99
00:03:23,108 --> 00:03:25,277
Dr. Jinx is the name of
a monkey, not a man.

100
00:03:25,344 --> 00:03:26,278
Come in.

101
00:03:26,345 --> 00:03:27,445
He lives in a garage?

102
00:03:27,513 --> 00:03:29,547
Yeah. Guys, look, let's just
give him a shot, all right?

103
00:03:29,615 --> 00:03:32,083
If we don't like what
we see, we reassess.

104
00:03:32,151 --> 00:03:33,451
All right. Go.

105
00:03:34,820 --> 00:03:36,087
Oh, I'm sorry.

106
00:03:36,155 --> 00:03:38,022
Are you Dr. Jinx?

107
00:03:38,090 --> 00:03:39,557
Indeed I am.

108
00:03:39,625 --> 00:03:41,259
Have a seat.

109
00:03:41,327 --> 00:03:43,628
Goddamn it.

110
00:03:45,831 --> 00:03:48,300
So, what are we gonna do, guys?

111
00:03:48,367 --> 00:03:52,304
I'd just like to say this
is, uh, this is weird.

112
00:03:52,371 --> 00:03:54,739
Now, I can understand your suspicions.

113
00:03:54,807 --> 00:03:57,074
Now, when most people think of a
doctor, they don't think of a

114
00:03:57,142 --> 00:03:59,678
black man living in a garage
surrounded by houseplants.

115
00:03:59,745 --> 00:04:00,878
I normally think Asian.

116
00:04:00,946 --> 00:04:03,748
Yeah, or I think of an Indian guy.

117
00:04:03,816 --> 00:04:04,882
Or white.

118
00:04:04,950 --> 00:04:06,818
Middle Eastern. Pretty much
anything other than black.

119
00:04:06,885 --> 00:04:07,819
Is that racist?

120
00:04:07,886 --> 00:04:08,787
Hell, yeah, it's racist.

121
00:04:08,854 --> 00:04:11,756
Your parents ain't let you watch The
Cosby Show when you was coming up?

122
00:04:11,824 --> 00:04:14,559
Oh, my parents would never have
let me watch something like that.

123
00:04:14,627 --> 00:04:16,361
Let's not make this about racism.

124
00:04:16,429 --> 00:04:18,863
Let's make this about the man
who's living in a garage

125
00:04:18,931 --> 00:04:19,931
treating my mom for cancer.

126
00:04:19,998 --> 00:04:24,469
Hey, hey, now, look, here's my deal: I
use ancient homeopathic remedies derived

127
00:04:24,537 --> 00:04:25,603
from the Mother Earth.

128
00:04:25,671 --> 00:04:27,839
You can't get no cleaner than that.

129
00:04:27,906 --> 00:04:29,841
Homeopathic from Mother Earth, huh?

130
00:04:29,908 --> 00:04:33,978
Dr. Jinx, I have an eczema situation
that's burning me up good.

131
00:04:34,046 --> 00:04:35,012
Do you have anything for that?

132
00:04:35,080 --> 00:04:35,980
Oh, shit.

133
00:04:36,048 --> 00:04:37,014
Well, that's not eczema.

134
00:04:37,082 --> 00:04:39,951
What you have there, my
friend, that's sailor's rot.

135
00:04:40,018 --> 00:04:41,118
Sailor's rot?

136
00:04:41,186 --> 00:04:42,220
I'm not a sailor, Dr. Jinx.

137
00:04:42,287 --> 00:04:44,322
When was the last time
you've been to Haiti?

138
00:04:44,390 --> 00:04:46,424
Never. I've never been to...
I've been to Kensington.

139
00:04:46,492 --> 00:04:48,393
When you was in Kensington,
did you have intercourse with

140
00:04:48,461 --> 00:04:50,528
any hoes, ladies of the
nights, or prostitutes?

141
00:04:50,596 --> 00:04:53,431
No. No. I have... Don't worry about it.

142
00:04:53,499 --> 00:04:54,399
Doctor-client privilege.

143
00:04:54,467 --> 00:04:55,400
Don't worry about it.

144
00:04:55,468 --> 00:04:56,701
I got what you need, okay?

145
00:04:56,769 --> 00:04:58,370
Oh! Oh! Oh, that burns!

146
00:04:59,805 --> 00:05:01,339
Mother Earth don't play.

147
00:05:01,407 --> 00:05:03,608
Do you have anything from the
Mother Earth that would be

148
00:05:03,676 --> 00:05:07,144
sprayed on me and cause me to
have feelings again 'cause I'm

149
00:05:07,212 --> 00:05:08,713
having trouble feeling things.

150
00:05:08,781 --> 00:05:10,882
Oh, you want feelings?

151
00:05:10,949 --> 00:05:12,917
Oh, I have something for that.

152
00:05:12,985 --> 00:05:15,720
Dr. Jinx got something for feelings.

153
00:05:33,205 --> 00:05:35,273
Okay, so that was a scam, right?

154
00:05:35,340 --> 00:05:36,107
Yep.

155
00:05:36,174 --> 00:05:37,208
Oh, absolutely, yeah.

156
00:05:37,276 --> 00:05:39,176
I think he sprayed me with Miracle-Gro.

157
00:05:39,244 --> 00:05:40,879
All right, guys, my mom
has real problems.

158
00:05:40,946 --> 00:05:41,780
I need real help.

159
00:05:41,847 --> 00:05:43,515
Oh, I got it.

160
00:05:43,582 --> 00:05:48,119
I know exactly who we
need to turn to next.

161
00:06:12,778 --> 00:06:14,879
Holy, holy, holy.

162
00:06:14,947 --> 00:06:20,852
Lord God of power and might, heaven
and earth are full of your glory.

163
00:06:20,920 --> 00:06:21,886
This is ridiculous.

164
00:06:21,954 --> 00:06:22,854
What are we doing here?

165
00:06:22,922 --> 00:06:24,456
We're turning to the big man upstairs.

166
00:06:24,523 --> 00:06:25,423
He's gonna make this right.

167
00:06:25,491 --> 00:06:28,225
I can't believe you think this is
a real solution to our problem.

168
00:06:28,293 --> 00:06:29,661
Dennis, what do you think of all this?

169
00:06:29,728 --> 00:06:31,596
Shh. Amen.

170
00:06:31,664 --> 00:06:32,797
I'm just trying to embrace this.

171
00:06:32,865 --> 00:06:35,199
I want to see if I can
knock some emotion loose.

172
00:06:35,267 --> 00:06:36,267
This is ridiculous.

173
00:06:36,335 --> 00:06:38,503
Hey, hey, hey, don't
say that; now kneel.

174
00:06:38,571 --> 00:06:39,938
Why do I have to kneel?

175
00:06:40,005 --> 00:06:40,972
I don't see the point.

176
00:06:41,039 --> 00:06:42,106
Because God wants it.

177
00:06:42,174 --> 00:06:44,809
Look, just do what the priest
says; don't ask why, just do.

178
00:06:44,877 --> 00:06:46,511
Look, our moms are here.

179
00:06:46,579 --> 00:06:47,812
They see the value in it.

180
00:06:47,880 --> 00:06:48,947
Why can't you?

181
00:06:49,682 --> 00:06:50,582
Where's your mom going?

182
00:06:50,649 --> 00:06:52,550
Oh, she keeps a cigarette
burning out on the steps

183
00:06:52,618 --> 00:06:54,352
outside, so she's gonna go hack a butt.

184
00:06:54,419 --> 00:06:56,287
So, she just comes and
goes as she pleases?

185
00:06:56,355 --> 00:06:58,255
There's no sort of rules for her?

186
00:06:58,323 --> 00:07:00,191
She's put her time in here, all right?

187
00:07:00,258 --> 00:07:01,993
The Lord makes an exception for her.

188
00:07:02,060 --> 00:07:02,994
Jesus Christ, man.

189
00:07:03,061 --> 00:07:05,463
Hey... stop using his
name in vain; now, stand.

190
00:07:05,531 --> 00:07:06,430
Stand?

191
00:07:06,499 --> 00:07:08,366
Yes, and give me some
money for the baskets.

192
00:07:08,433 --> 00:07:09,367
No, I'm not giving you money.

193
00:07:09,434 --> 00:07:11,335
We have to give money...
Thank you, thank you.

194
00:07:11,403 --> 00:07:13,270
Look, maybe the church should
give us money, you know?

195
00:07:13,338 --> 00:07:14,205
They seem to have plenty of it.

196
00:07:14,272 --> 00:07:16,841
Dude, the church doesn't give
money; it takes it, all right?

197
00:07:16,909 --> 00:07:17,809
That's the way it works.

198
00:07:17,877 --> 00:07:18,810
And then you go to heaven.

199
00:07:18,878 --> 00:07:19,544
Now, kneel.

200
00:07:19,612 --> 00:07:20,512
Kneel? I got to kneel again?

201
00:07:20,579 --> 00:07:21,513
Actually, it's over.

202
00:07:21,580 --> 00:07:22,480
We're standing again.

203
00:07:22,548 --> 00:07:23,447
Son of a bitch!

204
00:07:23,516 --> 00:07:24,448
This is a scam, okay?

205
00:07:24,517 --> 00:07:25,416
This is a scam.

206
00:07:25,484 --> 00:07:28,119
It's kneeling, standing,
getting people all confused.

207
00:07:28,186 --> 00:07:29,353
Hey, hey, come here.

208
00:07:29,421 --> 00:07:30,354
What are you doing?

209
00:07:30,422 --> 00:07:31,455
What are you doing?

210
00:07:31,524 --> 00:07:32,423
Offering you a sign of peace.

211
00:07:32,491 --> 00:07:33,391
I don't want this.

212
00:07:33,458 --> 00:07:34,759
Peace be with you.

213
00:07:34,827 --> 00:07:36,093
Can I say something?

214
00:07:36,161 --> 00:07:37,595
Can I say something?

215
00:07:37,663 --> 00:07:38,630
Sorry about your mother.

216
00:07:43,637 --> 00:07:45,738
Okay, I want to talk about
someone in your life.

217
00:07:45,806 --> 00:07:46,405
Okay.

218
00:07:46,473 --> 00:07:48,373
Okay, someone close to you.

219
00:07:48,441 --> 00:07:49,374
All right.

220
00:07:49,442 --> 00:07:55,214
I'm getting a Fa... No, I'm getting a Ba...
No, I'm getting a Da... Dennis?

221
00:07:55,281 --> 00:07:56,181
Dennis!

222
00:07:56,249 --> 00:07:57,149
Is it?

223
00:07:57,217 --> 00:07:59,284
Yes, yeah, no, I'm seeing that.

224
00:07:59,352 --> 00:08:00,252
Dennis?

225
00:08:00,320 --> 00:08:01,253
Yup, yup, I'm seeing Dennis.

226
00:08:01,321 --> 00:08:02,221
Okay.

227
00:08:02,288 --> 00:08:06,726
And I am feeling as if he is a neighbor...
or an enemy.

228
00:08:06,793 --> 00:08:09,829
He's a coworker, friend, he's a relative...
He's my brother.

229
00:08:09,896 --> 00:08:10,796
He's your brother.

230
00:08:10,864 --> 00:08:11,797
Oh, my God.

231
00:08:11,865 --> 00:08:12,765
Yes.

232
00:08:12,833 --> 00:08:14,700
Is he how I'm getting
my windfall of cash?

233
00:08:14,768 --> 00:08:18,370
You know, I'm not seeing clearly
yet how you get the cash.

234
00:08:18,438 --> 00:08:20,339
I do see a lot of money in your future.

235
00:08:20,406 --> 00:08:21,306
You do?

236
00:08:21,374 --> 00:08:23,509
Yeah, but...
Oh, shit.

237
00:08:23,576 --> 00:08:28,213
I think it's gonna take a few sessions
to really get the whole picture.

238
00:08:28,281 --> 00:08:29,314
Is it?

239
00:08:29,382 --> 00:08:32,652
Ha— I was just out buying
new shoes and I remembered

240
00:08:32,719 --> 00:08:35,187
I didn't want to give
you that hundred bucks.

241
00:08:35,255 --> 00:08:37,389
Yeah, and then you called me
and you said you changed your

242
00:08:37,457 --> 00:08:39,525
mind and you'd like to give me
another hundred, so where is it?

243
00:08:39,592 --> 00:08:40,492
I did?

244
00:08:40,560 --> 00:08:41,493
Yeah.

245
00:08:41,561 --> 00:08:42,862
Ah, shit.

246
00:08:42,929 --> 00:08:44,063
Hi. Psychic John.

247
00:08:44,131 --> 00:08:45,798
You have an interesting aura.

248
00:08:45,866 --> 00:08:47,332
Don't start with me.

249
00:08:47,400 --> 00:08:50,136
Who's gonna win the
Super Bowl this year?

250
00:08:50,203 --> 00:08:52,672
You don't know shit.

251
00:08:52,739 --> 00:08:55,440
Well, I do know that you lost
three pairs of shoes this month.

252
00:08:55,508 --> 00:08:58,310
You have a pork chop bone in
your left pocket; you have 57

253
00:08:58,378 --> 00:09:01,080
cents in your right, and you
clipped someone's side mirror

254
00:09:01,148 --> 00:09:03,783
while parking in a handicap spot.

255
00:09:03,850 --> 00:09:04,884
Holy shit.

256
00:09:04,951 --> 00:09:05,885
That's good.

257
00:09:05,952 --> 00:09:08,154
Can you conjure the dead?

258
00:09:08,221 --> 00:09:11,824
Can you get my dead whore wife
back here so I can lay into her

259
00:09:11,892 --> 00:09:13,159
from the other side?

260
00:09:13,226 --> 00:09:14,860
Well, I can't do that.

261
00:09:14,928 --> 00:09:16,862
Nah, because you're full of shit.

262
00:09:16,930 --> 00:09:20,632
I can't do it because I feel her
spirit is still very much alive.

263
00:09:22,002 --> 00:09:24,070
What? No, well, I don't
know about that.

264
00:09:24,137 --> 00:09:25,470
W-W-Wait a minute.

265
00:09:25,538 --> 00:09:29,241
I knew there was always something
suspicious about that whore's death.

266
00:09:29,309 --> 00:09:30,209
Really?

267
00:09:30,276 --> 00:09:31,744
Yes, we didn't ask any questions.

268
00:09:31,812 --> 00:09:32,644
We never saw the body.

269
00:09:32,713 --> 00:09:34,580
We didn't go to the funeral.

270
00:09:34,647 --> 00:09:37,549
I am feeling as if she is
still living somewhere in the

271
00:09:37,617 --> 00:09:40,019
city with a small Mexican dog.

272
00:09:41,054 --> 00:09:42,154
Does that ring a bell?

273
00:09:42,222 --> 00:09:46,025
Ooh, that dirty bitch.

274
00:09:47,327 --> 00:09:48,828
Well, I'll tell you, guys.

275
00:09:48,895 --> 00:09:51,563
I didn't feel much in there, but I
do always enjoy the little wafers.

276
00:09:51,631 --> 00:09:54,499
Of course you do because you're
consuming the actual body of Christ.

277
00:09:54,567 --> 00:09:56,301
Uh-huh, well, he was delicious.

278
00:09:56,369 --> 00:09:57,269
Wait, what?

279
00:09:57,337 --> 00:09:59,939
You're eating our Lord and Savior
Jesus Christ every Sunday, that's...

280
00:10:00,006 --> 00:10:02,507
You're telling me that you
believe that Christ comes back

281
00:10:02,575 --> 00:10:05,344
to life every Sunday in the form
of a bowl of crackers, and then

282
00:10:05,411 --> 00:10:07,012
you proceed to just eat the man?

283
00:10:07,080 --> 00:10:10,216
Correct, you consumed his corpse and you
drank his blood; that's a part of...

284
00:10:10,283 --> 00:10:11,217
Good, good, good, good.

285
00:10:11,284 --> 00:10:12,184
This is what we're dealing with.

286
00:10:12,252 --> 00:10:13,452
Hey, Mom.

287
00:10:13,519 --> 00:10:15,221
Can I talk to you for a second?

288
00:10:15,288 --> 00:10:16,222
Why are you here, honestly?

289
00:10:16,289 --> 00:10:17,890
I was praying for help.

290
00:10:17,958 --> 00:10:19,091
I need the money for Dr. Jinx.

291
00:10:19,159 --> 00:10:22,895
Dr. Jinx is a con artist and a lunatic.

292
00:10:22,963 --> 00:10:25,865
I-I know he's strange,
but he's a great doctor.

293
00:10:25,932 --> 00:10:26,832
He really does cure people.

294
00:10:26,900 --> 00:10:27,833
Hey, guys, look at this.

295
00:10:27,901 --> 00:10:29,769
My rash is almost
completely cleared up.

296
00:10:29,836 --> 00:10:30,770
Oh, my God.

297
00:10:30,837 --> 00:10:31,737
Whoa.

298
00:10:31,805 --> 00:10:32,704
Yeah, look at that.

299
00:10:32,773 --> 00:10:34,673
Whatever he sprayed on me worked.

300
00:10:34,741 --> 00:10:36,642
He might actually be a good doctor.

301
00:10:36,709 --> 00:10:37,676
Oh, shit.

302
00:10:37,744 --> 00:10:40,679
Hi, everybody, just a reminder
if you wouldn't mind.

303
00:10:40,747 --> 00:10:43,515
We're asking for extra donations
for the statue of the Blessed

304
00:10:43,583 --> 00:10:45,084
Mother that was vandalized last week.

305
00:10:45,152 --> 00:10:45,785
What the shit, man?

306
00:10:45,852 --> 00:10:46,585
Charlie.

307
00:10:46,653 --> 00:10:49,421
My mother is dying of cancer and
you need money to fix a statue?

308
00:10:49,489 --> 00:10:51,223
No, no, no, no, don't give me this act.

309
00:10:51,291 --> 00:10:52,191
Charlie, calm down.

310
00:10:52,259 --> 00:10:54,160
No, no, no, why don't you
give us some money, okay?

311
00:10:54,227 --> 00:10:55,127
How much is that ring worth?

312
00:10:55,195 --> 00:10:57,096
That looks like an expensive
ring; can we have the ring?

313
00:10:57,164 --> 00:10:59,865
Okay, uh-uh, I'm sorry, Father,
I will pray for his sins.

314
00:10:59,933 --> 00:11:00,866
I'm sorry.

315
00:11:00,934 --> 00:11:01,633
What are you doing?

316
00:11:01,701 --> 00:11:02,601
It's okay. I got this.

317
00:11:02,669 --> 00:11:03,402
What am I doing?

318
00:11:03,469 --> 00:11:04,203
What is he doing?

319
00:11:04,271 --> 00:11:05,204
No, listen, listen, listen.

320
00:11:05,272 --> 00:11:07,639
Don't get all riled up about this
scam or that scam, you know.

321
00:11:07,707 --> 00:11:08,774
It's all a big scam, okay?

322
00:11:08,842 --> 00:11:09,775
Yeah.

323
00:11:09,843 --> 00:11:11,710
But I will say this, the church's scam?

324
00:11:11,778 --> 00:11:12,778
It's a pretty good one.

325
00:11:12,846 --> 00:11:13,745
It's effective.

326
00:11:13,814 --> 00:11:16,048
Look at all the money these
people are giving to the church.

327
00:11:16,116 --> 00:11:19,852
So, I say we use that model to raise
money for your mom at Paddy's.

328
00:11:19,920 --> 00:11:22,121
Guys, let's throw a beef and beer.

329
00:11:22,189 --> 00:11:24,656
A beef and beer— it's been years.

330
00:11:24,724 --> 00:11:25,624
Beef and beer, huh?

331
00:11:25,692 --> 00:11:27,592
Yeah, we invite the members
of this congregation down to

332
00:11:27,660 --> 00:11:29,561
Paddy's for cheap beef
and watered-down beer.

333
00:11:29,629 --> 00:11:31,496
We'll prey on their Catholic
guilt by playing up your mom's

334
00:11:31,564 --> 00:11:32,798
cancer and "Oh, she's dying,"

335
00:11:32,866 --> 00:11:35,534
and she is, you know, and we'll
raise a bunch of money to give

336
00:11:35,601 --> 00:11:36,535
to your mom to give to Dr.

337
00:11:36,602 --> 00:11:37,169
Jinx.

338
00:11:37,237 --> 00:11:38,670
It's the Holy Trinity:

339
00:11:38,738 --> 00:11:41,307
beef and beer and Jesus.

340
00:11:43,443 --> 00:11:45,344
Dig, dig, dig.

341
00:11:45,411 --> 00:11:48,447
What makes you think she's got
money buried in the dog's grave?

342
00:11:48,514 --> 00:11:50,049
Well, she can't use a bank.

343
00:11:50,116 --> 00:11:52,417
She's probably got money
buried all over the city.

344
00:11:52,485 --> 00:11:54,887
Oop, there we go.

345
00:11:54,955 --> 00:11:55,855
Yeah, dig it up, dig it up.

346
00:11:55,922 --> 00:11:56,822
Come on, buddy.

347
00:11:56,890 --> 00:11:57,823
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

348
00:11:57,891 --> 00:11:58,590
Oh, yeah.

349
00:11:58,658 --> 00:12:00,192
Aah, goddamn!

350
00:12:00,260 --> 00:12:01,327
Aw, there's a dead dog in there!

351
00:12:01,394 --> 00:12:02,494
Gross!

352
00:12:02,562 --> 00:12:04,330
That's not a dog.

353
00:12:04,397 --> 00:12:07,166
That's my toupee, my blond toupee.

354
00:12:07,234 --> 00:12:08,667
I used to wear this in Miami.

355
00:12:08,735 --> 00:12:09,668
She hated this goddamn thing.

356
00:12:09,736 --> 00:12:10,635
Oh, she didn't like that?

357
00:12:10,703 --> 00:12:11,370
No.

358
00:12:11,437 --> 00:12:12,771
You are an idiot.

359
00:12:12,839 --> 00:12:15,875
Oh, my God, there is some cash.

360
00:12:15,942 --> 00:12:17,343
That dirty whore.

361
00:12:17,410 --> 00:12:19,311
There's got to be, like,
five grand in here.

362
00:12:19,379 --> 00:12:21,914
I bet she's probably got this
stuff hidden all over the city.

363
00:12:21,982 --> 00:12:23,482
I can't believe this.

364
00:12:23,549 --> 00:12:24,483
She's alive.

365
00:12:24,550 --> 00:12:27,619
We better tell your brother Daryl 'cause
he's gonna want to be in the loop.

366
00:12:27,687 --> 00:12:29,588
Dennis?

367
00:12:29,655 --> 00:12:31,423
Dennis, Dennis, goddamn it!

368
00:12:31,491 --> 00:12:32,557
Okay, shh.

369
00:12:32,625 --> 00:12:33,792
Frank, you're losing it!

370
00:12:33,860 --> 00:12:34,826
Stop it. Pipe down.

371
00:12:34,895 --> 00:12:35,794
People live here.

372
00:12:35,862 --> 00:12:36,896
My head is turning to soup.

373
00:12:36,963 --> 00:12:37,930
Okay, I get it.

374
00:12:37,998 --> 00:12:40,966
Hey, uh-uh, Mr... Juarez.

375
00:12:41,034 --> 00:12:42,201
Mr. Juarez, that's right.

376
00:12:42,269 --> 00:12:45,137
You remember the Mexican family
whose house we burned down and

377
00:12:45,205 --> 00:12:46,171
we had to give them our mansion.

378
00:12:46,239 --> 00:12:50,276
Oh, how do you like the mansion?

379
00:12:50,343 --> 00:12:52,411
Oh, it's been very, very nice.

380
00:12:52,478 --> 00:12:55,680
You know, the weddings, the
quinceañeras, but it's very expensive.

381
00:12:55,748 --> 00:12:59,018
Uh, how you call it, uh, property tax.

382
00:12:59,085 --> 00:13:00,319
It's too much.

383
00:13:00,387 --> 00:13:01,453
Yeah.

384
00:13:01,521 --> 00:13:02,288
We had to leave.

385
00:13:02,355 --> 00:13:04,656
Anyway, I am back here every Saturday.

386
00:13:04,724 --> 00:13:05,690
Why?

387
00:13:05,758 --> 00:13:09,628
Oh, I have to go to work.

388
00:13:09,695 --> 00:13:10,829
Aw, shit.

389
00:13:10,897 --> 00:13:11,797
Well, that sucks.

390
00:13:11,864 --> 00:13:12,864
Tell you what.

391
00:13:12,933 --> 00:13:14,934
Property taxes— paying
for what you already own?

392
00:13:15,001 --> 00:13:17,303
Now, that's a scam.

393
00:13:32,785 --> 00:13:33,852
Padre!

394
00:13:33,920 --> 00:13:34,797
So good to see you.

395
00:13:34,917 --> 00:13:36,321
So good of you to come.

396
00:13:36,388 --> 00:13:37,410
Oh... Yeah, right on, right on.

397
00:13:37,530 --> 00:13:38,722
Well, it's for a good cause, isn't it?

398
00:13:38,828 --> 00:13:40,628
So... have some beef, have some beer.

399
00:13:40,697 --> 00:13:42,731
And if you feel the calling, you
know, go ahead and pop that ring

400
00:13:42,799 --> 00:13:44,514
in the donation bucket.

401
00:13:44,634 --> 00:13:45,949
Although I know you won't.

402
00:13:47,019 --> 00:13:48,081
All right.
Have a good time.

403
00:13:48,201 --> 00:13:50,302
We're both playing the same
game, I-I totally get it.

404
00:13:50,369 --> 00:13:51,636
I get what you're doing.

405
00:14:00,668 --> 00:14:02,080
Let me see the-the neck.

406
00:14:02,200 --> 00:14:03,248
Mom, turn your head that way.

407
00:14:03,753 --> 00:14:05,093
Can we do more lesions?

408
00:14:05,375 --> 00:14:07,109
No, dude, the lesions are fine.

409
00:14:07,177 --> 00:14:07,909
That's overkill.

410
00:14:07,977 --> 00:14:08,777
Trust me.

411
00:14:08,844 --> 00:14:12,256
I don't know why I have to wear all
this makeup, and wear a bald cap.

412
00:14:12,377 --> 00:14:14,311
Mom, you want people to
feel sorry for you, right?

413
00:14:14,379 --> 00:14:15,312
Then they give a lot of money.

414
00:14:15,380 --> 00:14:17,247
And you just don't look that sick.

415
00:14:17,315 --> 00:14:18,048
You gotta look sicker.

416
00:14:18,116 --> 00:14:19,283
But I feel like it's lying.

417
00:14:19,350 --> 00:14:20,518
Oh, it's not lying, Mrs.

418
00:14:20,585 --> 00:14:22,352
Kelly, because you are dying of cancer.

419
00:14:22,421 --> 00:14:23,353
Yeah.

420
00:14:23,422 --> 00:14:25,355
It's devouring your insides.

421
00:14:25,424 --> 00:14:29,126
But we need for it to devour your outside,
so it plays better for our audience.

422
00:14:29,193 --> 00:14:32,095
Yeah, look, Mom, it's just basic
Hollywood stuff, all right?

423
00:14:32,163 --> 00:14:32,897
Don't fight it.

424
00:14:32,964 --> 00:14:34,732
Why can't you get Frank
to give me the money?

425
00:14:34,800 --> 00:14:37,468
Frank's not really like a
big charity kind of guy.

426
00:14:37,536 --> 00:14:38,469
He's not really gonna give it.

427
00:14:38,537 --> 00:14:39,437
Okay.

428
00:14:39,504 --> 00:14:41,305
Let's talk about the speech, okay?

429
00:14:41,372 --> 00:14:43,073
Can you go over the
speech that we gave you?

430
00:14:43,141 --> 00:14:43,974
I don't like this speech.

431
00:14:44,042 --> 00:14:44,975
This speech is too graphic.

432
00:14:45,043 --> 00:14:47,110
It... it needs to be graphic
to get their attention.

433
00:14:47,178 --> 00:14:48,011
This bitch is driving me crazy.

434
00:14:48,079 --> 00:14:48,846
I'm sorry.

435
00:14:48,914 --> 00:14:50,848
Look, that's the kind of stuff
that's going to grab people, you

436
00:14:50,916 --> 00:14:51,649
know what I mean?

437
00:14:51,716 --> 00:14:53,851
Like... graphic stuff, melt their...
Artemis, what are you doing?

438
00:14:53,919 --> 00:14:55,319
You can't smoke in here.

439
00:14:55,386 --> 00:14:56,420
It's not tobacco.

440
00:14:56,488 --> 00:14:59,256
I realize it's not tobacco, but it's
not going to be good for her lungs.

441
00:14:59,324 --> 00:15:01,058
She's already... I'm
used to smoke around me.

442
00:15:01,125 --> 00:15:02,860
Oh... She can recover.

443
00:15:02,928 --> 00:15:03,694
She can beat it.

444
00:15:03,762 --> 00:15:05,395
It's only going to add...
Can you go outside?

445
00:15:05,464 --> 00:15:06,831
Whatever.

446
00:15:06,898 --> 00:15:08,131
I'm gonna go have some beef.

447
00:15:08,199 --> 00:15:10,568
Have some beef, but don't
smoke in front of the woman.

448
00:15:20,011 --> 00:15:22,947
We are Dr. Jinx, and we'll
be back in a minute.

449
00:15:23,014 --> 00:15:23,581
All right.

450
00:15:23,648 --> 00:15:24,782
All right, that's good stuff.

451
00:15:24,850 --> 00:15:28,051
Good stuff, hey... everybody give it
up one more time for Dr. Jinx, huh?

452
00:15:29,821 --> 00:15:31,288
Dr. Jinx.

453
00:15:31,356 --> 00:15:35,292
The man with a band
named after himself.

454
00:15:35,360 --> 00:15:38,729
Well, ladies and gentlemen,
we all know why we're here.

455
00:15:38,797 --> 00:15:42,533
To celebrate the beautiful life
of the beautiful Bonnie Kelly.

456
00:15:42,601 --> 00:15:44,702
But I'd like to take a moment,
if-if you'll indulge me.

457
00:15:44,769 --> 00:15:49,139
I learned something very important
today, and it just dawned on me.

458
00:15:49,207 --> 00:15:50,875
I want to talk about faith.

459
00:15:50,942 --> 00:15:52,543
Right on.

460
00:15:52,611 --> 00:15:57,882
It's not about... whether
something is true, or-or based

461
00:15:57,949 --> 00:16:03,387
in fact, or reality, or the laws
of physics, or nature, or-or

462
00:16:03,454 --> 00:16:06,056
even basic common sense.

463
00:16:06,124 --> 00:16:11,161
It's about whether or not we're dumb
enough to believe in it that matters.

464
00:16:11,229 --> 00:16:15,132
Oh, folks, who the hell am I
to say that there is no God?

465
00:16:15,199 --> 00:16:16,466
Who am I?

466
00:16:16,535 --> 00:16:19,603
Or to say that anybody's belief in the
church doesn't make their life better?

467
00:16:19,671 --> 00:16:20,604
Maybe it does.

468
00:16:20,672 --> 00:16:25,175
Or that this man, Dr. Jinx...
who am I to say that he can't

469
00:16:25,243 --> 00:16:27,477
cure diseases with his sorcery?

470
00:16:27,546 --> 00:16:29,146
I don't know.

471
00:16:29,213 --> 00:16:31,749
I say, maybe he can.

472
00:16:31,816 --> 00:16:34,084
And I believe that maybe he can.

473
00:16:36,454 --> 00:16:43,126
Ladies and gentlemen, if we believe...
if we just believe...

474
00:16:43,194 --> 00:16:45,896
then we can do anything!

475
00:16:49,300 --> 00:16:50,901
Oh, yeah, ladies and
gentlemen, I feel it now!

476
00:16:50,969 --> 00:16:51,735
Do you feel it?

477
00:16:51,803 --> 00:16:53,037
Do you feel the spirit?

478
00:16:53,104 --> 00:16:56,206
Do you feel the invisible things
around you that don't really exist?

479
00:16:56,274 --> 00:16:57,407
Oh, it doesn't matter!

480
00:16:57,475 --> 00:16:59,142
Dr. Jinx feels it, yeah!

481
00:16:59,210 --> 00:17:00,177
Woo, I feel good!

482
00:17:00,244 --> 00:17:01,144
Yeah!

483
00:17:01,212 --> 00:17:03,781
We feel magnificent, yeah!

484
00:17:03,848 --> 00:17:07,217
And we can cure cancer with plants.

485
00:17:07,786 --> 00:17:09,352
Amen.

486
00:17:09,420 --> 00:17:10,253
Mm, thank you so much.

487
00:17:10,321 --> 00:17:11,321
Thank you so much.

488
00:17:11,389 --> 00:17:12,623
Oh, oh-oh-oh.

489
00:17:12,691 --> 00:17:14,592
Dennis, that was amazing, dude.

490
00:17:14,659 --> 00:17:15,626
I am so proud of you.

491
00:17:15,694 --> 00:17:17,061
You are feeling again.

492
00:17:17,128 --> 00:17:19,329
No.

493
00:17:19,397 --> 00:17:21,565
I meant none of it.

494
00:17:21,633 --> 00:17:22,532
Let's go, Mom, come on.

495
00:17:22,601 --> 00:17:24,201
Just read the speech.

496
00:17:24,268 --> 00:17:25,268
I don't think I can do this.

497
00:17:25,336 --> 00:17:26,269
You-you can do it.

498
00:17:26,337 --> 00:17:27,137
You'll be great.

499
00:17:27,205 --> 00:17:30,074
My... my mom has a speech!

500
00:17:30,141 --> 00:17:34,712
"Thank you all for coming to
our Beef and Beer and Jesus.

501
00:17:34,779 --> 00:17:41,652
As you know, I'm as sick as a
three-legged dog on the streets of India.

502
00:17:41,720 --> 00:17:46,456
Any minute, my lungs are going
to sizzle, pop, and disintegrate

503
00:17:46,524 --> 00:17:50,360
into a liquid lung and
organ gumbo soup."

504
00:17:50,428 --> 00:17:52,062
That was my line.

505
00:17:52,130 --> 00:17:53,030
Nice.

506
00:17:53,098 --> 00:17:54,098
Mm.

507
00:17:54,165 --> 00:17:55,899
Charlie, I can't do this.

508
00:17:55,967 --> 00:17:56,800
Just get to the money part.

509
00:17:56,868 --> 00:17:58,502
All right, just get
the money part done.

510
00:17:58,569 --> 00:17:59,637
"Give me money.

511
00:17:59,704 --> 00:18:01,038
Money me.

512
00:18:01,106 --> 00:18:02,372
Money now.

513
00:18:02,440 --> 00:18:05,308
Me a money needing a lot now."

514
00:18:05,376 --> 00:18:06,644
That was Charlie's line.

515
00:18:06,711 --> 00:18:07,678
Yeah.

516
00:18:07,746 --> 00:18:08,646
Eh.

517
00:18:08,713 --> 00:18:09,913
Charlie, I-I can't do this.

518
00:18:09,981 --> 00:18:10,914
Doing great.

519
00:18:10,982 --> 00:18:11,882
Doing great.

520
00:18:11,950 --> 00:18:14,451
I have a confession to
make to all of you.

521
00:18:14,519 --> 00:18:16,486
Don't do it, bitch!

522
00:18:16,554 --> 00:18:18,488
I don't have cancer.

523
00:18:18,556 --> 00:18:19,489
What?

524
00:18:24,095 --> 00:18:28,198
We're the ones that broke
the Virgin Mary statue.

525
00:18:28,266 --> 00:18:30,868
We accidentally hit it with our car.

526
00:18:30,935 --> 00:18:35,739
Mm... We were trying to raise
money to get it fixed.

527
00:18:35,807 --> 00:18:37,374
That's just crazy.

528
00:18:37,441 --> 00:18:39,977
You could've just told me the
story about hitting the statue.

529
00:18:40,045 --> 00:18:41,979
I mean, where did you
come up with this idea?

530
00:18:42,047 --> 00:18:45,315
Well, I learned everything
by watching you.

531
00:18:45,383 --> 00:18:48,786
Well, I... Oh... Aw, shit,
I did do that, huh?

532
00:18:48,853 --> 00:18:50,888
Yeah, you totally... you
pulled that shit on us, too.

533
00:18:50,955 --> 00:18:52,556
Well... You son of a bitch.

534
00:18:52,623 --> 00:18:53,523
That's no excuse.

535
00:18:53,591 --> 00:18:56,293
Yeah, well, at least you didn't
try and grift a doctor, though.

536
00:18:56,360 --> 00:18:58,028
No, no, I never actually
said I was a doctor.

537
00:18:58,096 --> 00:19:00,564
He is the goddamn church gardener.

538
00:19:00,631 --> 00:19:01,932
A gardener?

539
00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:03,400
I guess that would explain this.

540
00:19:03,467 --> 00:19:04,168
Oh!

541
00:19:04,235 --> 00:19:06,269
Oh, Jesus... I was gonna
talk to you about that.

542
00:19:06,337 --> 00:19:07,104
I'm really sorry.

543
00:19:07,172 --> 00:19:08,906
You had my back up against the
wall, I had to spray you with a

544
00:19:08,973 --> 00:19:11,157
heavy dose of pesticide.

545
00:19:11,417 --> 00:19:14,291
Put some aloe vera gel on there, a
little bit of vitamin D... What?

546
00:19:14,411 --> 00:19:15,144
He doesn't know that.

547
00:19:15,212 --> 00:19:16,012
He doesn't know that.

548
00:19:16,079 --> 00:19:18,108
Don't get a diagnosis from him now.
Why... how would you know that?

549
00:19:18,228 --> 00:19:18,925
Goddamn it.

550
00:19:19,045 --> 00:19:20,560
Dennis. Dennis!

551
00:19:20,680 --> 00:19:22,084
Mom's alive.

552
00:19:22,152 --> 00:19:24,086
She faked her own death to steal
Frank's money, and we think it's

553
00:19:24,154 --> 00:19:24,921
buried in her grave.

554
00:19:24,989 --> 00:19:26,288
That dirty whore.

555
00:19:26,356 --> 00:19:29,432
Everybody get a goddamn shovel!

556
00:19:30,260 --> 00:19:34,196
This is such a perfect place for
that bitch to hide my money.

557
00:19:34,264 --> 00:19:36,132
Oh, Psychic John talked about this.

558
00:19:36,199 --> 00:19:38,835
He said I was gonna come into a
windfall of cash, and it's all in here.

559
00:19:38,903 --> 00:19:40,870
Yeah, and then we can use some
of that cash to pay for the

560
00:19:40,938 --> 00:19:44,140
statue that our moms broke, Charlie.

561
00:19:44,207 --> 00:19:45,642
All right!

562
00:19:46,710 --> 00:19:47,443
You guys ready?

563
00:19:47,511 --> 00:19:48,277
Crack it open, Charlie.

564
00:19:48,345 --> 00:19:50,914
Charlie, Charlie...
Show me the

565
00:19:50,981 --> 00:19:52,949
money, show me the money...

566
00:19:53,017 --> 00:19:54,584
Ah, shit!

567
00:19:55,719 --> 00:19:57,587
No! No!

568
00:19:57,655 --> 00:19:58,821
Mommy, Mommy!

569
00:19:58,889 --> 00:20:00,423
Ah! I grifted ya!

570
00:20:00,490 --> 00:20:01,791
What are you talking about?

571
00:20:01,859 --> 00:20:03,325
I paid off the psychic.

572
00:20:03,393 --> 00:20:05,828
I buried the money in the dog grave.

573
00:20:05,896 --> 00:20:07,997
My mommy, my
mommy's a skeleton!

574
00:20:09,313 --> 00:20:12,378
I grifted your asses good because
you said I was slipping.

575
00:20:12,498 --> 00:20:13,398
I feel too much!

576
00:20:13,466 --> 00:20:14,466
I feel too much!

577
00:20:15,635 --> 00:20:18,236
You made me dig up my dead mother
because I said you were losing it?

578
00:20:18,304 --> 00:20:20,663
Score one for the old people.

579
00:20:20,783 --> 00:20:21,582
Ha ha!

580
00:20:21,650 --> 00:20:23,922
Wait a minute.

581
00:20:24,689 --> 00:20:26,696
What the hell happened to my shoes?

582
00:20:27,516 --> 00:20:37,516
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com