1
00:00:09,200 --> 00:00:10,233
What's going on
with you, man?

2
00:00:10,235 --> 00:00:11,501
Are you limping?

3
00:00:11,503 --> 00:00:13,070
Uh, no, I've just
been working out

4
00:00:13,072 --> 00:00:14,905
on this new
exercise bike I got,

5
00:00:14,907 --> 00:00:17,240
and my glutes are,
like, so sore.
Yeah.

6
00:00:17,242 --> 00:00:18,442
Know what it is?
Oh.

7
00:00:18,444 --> 00:00:20,110
Yeah, big-time,
big-time.
Howdy.

8
00:00:20,112 --> 00:00:22,846
Hi.
It's... it's very
windy today, isn't it?

9
00:00:22,848 --> 00:00:23,847
Yeah.

10
00:00:23,849 --> 00:00:25,916
Oh, man, look at this.

11
00:00:25,918 --> 00:00:27,617
Dog shit.

12
00:00:27,619 --> 00:00:29,686
Did you just step
in that on purpose?

13
00:00:29,688 --> 00:00:32,355
Oh, no, I just... you know,
I didn't really see it.

14
00:00:32,357 --> 00:00:33,557
You pointed it out to me!

15
00:00:33,559 --> 00:00:35,192
And then you stepped
directly in it.

16
00:00:35,194 --> 00:00:36,526
Since when do you read?
What? Nothing.

17
00:00:36,528 --> 00:00:37,761
No.

18
00:00:37,763 --> 00:00:39,296
Books are stupid.

19
00:00:39,298 --> 00:00:40,931
I don't. I was just...

20
00:00:42,100 --> 00:00:43,433
It wasn't... like,
I didn't time it out.

21
00:00:43,435 --> 00:00:45,569
I mean, why would
I do that?
I have no idea.

22
00:00:47,906 --> 00:00:49,473
People step in dog shit
accidentally all the time.

23
00:00:49,475 --> 00:00:51,708
Is that a lottery scratcher?

24
00:00:52,643 --> 00:00:53,643
Sometimes it's in,

25
00:00:53,645 --> 00:00:55,579
sometimes it's out.
Are those mirrors?

26
00:00:55,581 --> 00:00:57,147
No.
You creep.

27
00:01:04,555 --> 00:01:06,623
Look out, faggot!

28
00:01:20,004 --> 00:01:21,138
Holy shit.

29
00:01:21,140 --> 00:01:22,139
God!

30
00:01:22,141 --> 00:01:23,607
Are you okay?

31
00:01:25,010 --> 00:01:26,977
Hey, frank,
what the hell was that?

32
00:01:26,979 --> 00:01:29,112
What? I saved your life.

33
00:01:29,114 --> 00:01:30,413
But you called me
the "f" word.

34
00:01:30,415 --> 00:01:32,315
So what? I'm a hero.

35
00:01:32,317 --> 00:01:33,817
You used a slur, dude.

36
00:01:33,819 --> 00:01:35,352
That's like a hate crime.

37
00:01:35,354 --> 00:01:37,954
You really can't...
Yeah, but he saved his life.

38
00:01:35,354 --> 00:01:45,354
Yeah, that's
hateful speech, man.

39
00:01:37,956 --> 00:01:39,322
Yeah, but you can't
say that word anymore.

40
00:01:39,324 --> 00:01:40,857
So, which is it?

41
00:02:04,782 --> 00:02:07,384
You are entitled to nothing!

42
00:02:07,386 --> 00:02:09,052
Listen, motion to present

43
00:02:09,054 --> 00:02:10,453
articles of confederation.

44
00:02:10,455 --> 00:02:12,289
Motion denied.
Oh...
Shut up, bitch.

45
00:02:12,291 --> 00:02:13,356
You don't
deserve anything.

46
00:02:13,358 --> 00:02:15,458
Excuse me. Hey. Can I help you?

47
00:02:15,460 --> 00:02:17,360
Okay, look, well, usually,
we're a pretty reasonable crew.

48
00:02:17,362 --> 00:02:18,995
Yeah, right? I mean...
Yeah.

49
00:02:18,997 --> 00:02:20,230
we have our differences,
but we settle them in house.

50
00:02:20,232 --> 00:02:21,565
Sure.
We have a good process.

51
00:02:21,567 --> 00:02:22,966
There's filibusters,
the whole thing.

52
00:02:22,968 --> 00:02:24,968
No.
This one's a doozy.

53
00:02:26,305 --> 00:02:28,338
That's why I wanted
to bring in a third party.

54
00:02:28,340 --> 00:02:30,807
Someone to hear us out and
deliver a final verdict.

55
00:02:30,809 --> 00:02:31,808
That's you, guy.
Yeah, that's... you.

56
00:02:31,810 --> 00:02:32,809
That's you.

57
00:02:32,811 --> 00:02:33,877
Because a great injustice

58
00:02:33,879 --> 00:02:35,378
has occurred, okay?

59
00:02:35,380 --> 00:02:36,813
Frank committed
a hate crime.

60
00:02:36,815 --> 00:02:38,248
I saved your life.

61
00:02:38,250 --> 00:02:40,417
But you used a slur!
It was a slur.

62
00:02:40,419 --> 00:02:41,985
That's...
You'd be dead
if I didn't!

63
00:02:41,987 --> 00:02:43,220
Okay, okay,
I think I'm getting it.

64
00:02:43,222 --> 00:02:45,055
You want me to figure out
whether or not

65
00:02:45,057 --> 00:02:46,223
a hate crime's been committed?

66
00:02:46,225 --> 00:02:47,591
What?

67
00:02:47,593 --> 00:02:48,592
No.
No, no, no, no.

68
00:02:48,594 --> 00:02:49,826
Way off. Way off.
No, no,
no, no, no.

69
00:02:49,828 --> 00:02:51,861
Oh, no, but, no,
it's not about that at all.

70
00:02:51,863 --> 00:02:53,697
Yeah, it's about this.

71
00:02:53,699 --> 00:02:56,433
A two-dollar scratcher
lottery ticket.

72
00:02:56,435 --> 00:02:57,701
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.

73
00:02:57,703 --> 00:03:00,437
Y-you've hired an
arbitration attorney

74
00:03:00,439 --> 00:03:02,339
to figure out which
of you is entitled

75
00:03:02,341 --> 00:03:03,573
to a two-dollar
scratcher?

76
00:03:03,575 --> 00:03:04,574
Now you're getting it.
Me.

77
00:03:04,576 --> 00:03:06,276
He's getting it.
Now he gets it.

78
00:03:06,278 --> 00:03:08,378
The thing is, each one
of us feels that we're entitled

79
00:03:08,380 --> 00:03:09,713
to that ticket,
and we need you

80
00:03:09,715 --> 00:03:11,348
to tell us who
it belongs to.
Yeah.

81
00:03:11,350 --> 00:03:13,783
Why don't you scratch it
and see if it's worthless,

82
00:03:13,785 --> 00:03:16,353
and then you wouldn't have
to go through all of this?

83
00:03:16,355 --> 00:03:17,420
Okay, so he's
not getting it.
What?

84
00:03:17,422 --> 00:03:18,722
Is he serious?
Do you not want a job?

85
00:03:18,724 --> 00:03:20,624
Hold on. Is it Phil?
Is your name Phil?

86
00:03:20,626 --> 00:03:22,292
Yeah, Phil, yeah.
It is Phil?

87
00:03:22,294 --> 00:03:23,393
It's Phil.

88
00:03:23,395 --> 00:03:25,295
This ticket
represents hope, okay?

89
00:03:25,297 --> 00:03:26,930
Potential... yeah?

90
00:03:26,932 --> 00:03:28,298
Promise.

91
00:03:28,300 --> 00:03:31,801
The very foundation upon
which this group rests, eh?

92
00:03:31,803 --> 00:03:32,802
Yes.
And that hope

93
00:03:32,804 --> 00:03:34,371
belongs to me.

94
00:03:34,373 --> 00:03:36,139
It belongs to me,
you son of a bitch!

95
00:03:38,477 --> 00:03:40,043
Please, stop.

96
00:03:40,045 --> 00:03:42,946
Each of you will have an
opportunity to plead your case.

97
00:03:42,948 --> 00:03:45,915
The only rule I have is that
you each treat each other

98
00:03:45,917 --> 00:03:49,119
with respect
and common courtesy.

99
00:03:49,121 --> 00:03:51,521
Do we all agree
to those terms?

100
00:03:53,491 --> 00:03:55,759
Well, we would like
to thank you so much

101
00:03:55,761 --> 00:03:57,661
for taking our case
so last-minute.

102
00:03:57,663 --> 00:03:59,462
The other guy was not our style.

103
00:03:59,464 --> 00:04:01,731
Well, I'm very happy to do so.

104
00:04:01,733 --> 00:04:04,134
I do have a few questions.

105
00:04:04,136 --> 00:04:05,468
Fire away.
Yup.
Of course, yeah.

106
00:04:05,470 --> 00:04:09,406
Now, the ticket in question,
uh, who purchased it?

107
00:04:09,408 --> 00:04:10,407
Me! Thank you.
Well...

108
00:04:10,409 --> 00:04:13,143
this whole thing is
so cut and dry.
It's...

109
00:04:10,409 --> 00:04:20,409
That was me,
and that's why

110
00:04:13,145 --> 00:04:14,444
Hold on.
I purchased the ticket,

111
00:04:14,446 --> 00:04:17,080
and therefore
the ticket belongs to me.

112
00:04:17,082 --> 00:04:20,517
I actually bought the ticket
a couple of weeks ago.

113
00:04:20,519 --> 00:04:23,286
But I didn't realize it was
gonna be so goddamn blustery

114
00:04:23,288 --> 00:04:25,355
that afternoon.

115
00:04:25,357 --> 00:04:27,757
And as I was putting my book
into my purse,

116
00:04:27,759 --> 00:04:30,393
the ticket flew out
and landed on the ground.

117
00:04:32,496 --> 00:04:34,364
So, you purchased the ticket
two weeks ago.

118
00:04:34,366 --> 00:04:35,465
I did.

119
00:04:35,467 --> 00:04:37,801
And why hadn't you
scratched the ticket yet?

120
00:04:37,803 --> 00:04:40,203
Oh... well,
that's because

121
00:04:40,205 --> 00:04:41,871
nobody ever wins
those tickets, right?

122
00:04:41,873 --> 00:04:43,673
But as long as you
don't scratch it,

123
00:04:43,675 --> 00:04:45,008
then you're not a loser.

124
00:04:45,010 --> 00:04:48,144
You know, in fact,
you're a winner.

125
00:04:48,146 --> 00:04:49,546
Potentially.

126
00:04:49,548 --> 00:04:51,548
God, Dee...
That is so sad!

127
00:04:51,550 --> 00:04:52,549
It's so pathetic.
What are...

128
00:04:52,551 --> 00:04:53,983
It is pathetic.
So sad.

129
00:04:53,985 --> 00:04:55,352
What are you talking—
you just said

130
00:04:55,354 --> 00:04:56,953
this exact same thing,
like, ten minutes ago,

131
00:04:56,955 --> 00:04:57,987
talking about
how the ticket

132
00:04:57,989 --> 00:04:59,022
represented hope and
all that bullshit.

133
00:04:59,024 --> 00:05:01,825
Somehow coming from you,
it just came off so sad.

134
00:05:01,827 --> 00:05:03,727
Well, hold on a second.
Motion for sub-arbitration

135
00:05:03,729 --> 00:05:05,395
to determine whether
or not that's sad.

136
00:05:05,397 --> 00:05:06,996
Motion accepted.
All in favor?

137
00:05:06,998 --> 00:05:07,997
Aye.

138
00:05:07,999 --> 00:05:09,165
Motion passed.
It's sad, Dee.

139
00:05:09,167 --> 00:05:10,333
I'd also like to point out

140
00:05:10,335 --> 00:05:12,469
that while Dee's version
is the truth,

141
00:05:12,471 --> 00:05:14,170
it's not the whole truth.

142
00:05:14,172 --> 00:05:17,974
Why don't we talk about
the contents of Dee's purse?

143
00:05:17,976 --> 00:05:20,477
The scratcher ticket,
the candy sour worms,

144
00:05:20,479 --> 00:05:21,544
the pack of cigarettes.

145
00:05:21,546 --> 00:05:24,381
Now, what I want to know is...

146
00:05:24,383 --> 00:05:27,016
How can a woman who makes
less than minimum wage

147
00:05:27,018 --> 00:05:29,519
afford such impulse buys?

148
00:05:29,521 --> 00:05:32,389
So, you're
smoking now, Dee?

149
00:05:32,391 --> 00:05:33,923
Is this about your weight?

150
00:05:33,925 --> 00:05:36,259
Because if it is,
you're already too bony.

151
00:05:36,261 --> 00:05:37,927
No, I don't think so.
I mean, I think you're

152
00:05:37,929 --> 00:05:39,062
getting pretty tubby
in the midsection area.

153
00:05:39,064 --> 00:05:40,497
What?
Like a bird.

154
00:05:40,499 --> 00:05:41,865
No, no, that's fine.

155
00:05:41,867 --> 00:05:44,601
Her hands are becoming a
major problem for me though.

156
00:05:44,603 --> 00:05:46,436
I have Parkinson's disease.

157
00:05:46,438 --> 00:05:47,737
What?

158
00:05:47,739 --> 00:05:50,607
Well, at least
I have a 46% chance

159
00:05:50,609 --> 00:05:53,443
of getting Parkinson's disease,
according to a DNA test I took.

160
00:05:53,445 --> 00:05:56,179
The medical journal
was because I'm trying to learn

161
00:05:56,181 --> 00:05:58,415
as much as I can
about this, you know?

162
00:05:58,417 --> 00:05:59,616
And, you guys,
according to that,

163
00:05:59,618 --> 00:06:01,451
smoking can reduce
your risk of...

164
00:06:01,453 --> 00:06:03,586
Oh, my god,
who gives a shit?

165
00:06:03,588 --> 00:06:05,388
What?
Dee, this isn't
about whether or not

166
00:06:05,390 --> 00:06:07,424
you have some horrific
neurological disease

167
00:06:07,426 --> 00:06:09,259
or whether or not your
hands are the right size.

168
00:06:09,261 --> 00:06:11,428
They are, by the way,
but your elbows are a mess.

169
00:06:11,430 --> 00:06:12,629
They're too sharp.

170
00:06:12,631 --> 00:06:13,563
I don't like it.
They're stabbing me.

171
00:06:13,565 --> 00:06:14,964
That's what it is.
You got it.

172
00:06:14,966 --> 00:06:16,633
That's not the point,
that's not the point.

173
00:06:16,635 --> 00:06:20,637
The point is: How can you
actually afford to smoke?

174
00:06:20,639 --> 00:06:22,639
You see, Dee and I
had a deal.

175
00:06:22,641 --> 00:06:23,807
I give her money
for coffee

176
00:06:23,809 --> 00:06:25,475
every morning on
the way to work.

177
00:06:25,477 --> 00:06:28,077
And she's instructed to give

178
00:06:28,079 --> 00:06:29,946
a very generous tip
to the cashier, Cassie.

179
00:06:31,816 --> 00:06:34,551
"This is from my boss, Dennis."

180
00:06:34,553 --> 00:06:37,921
Now, this establishes
both generosity and authority.

181
00:06:37,923 --> 00:06:39,656
Possibly a little dominance.

182
00:06:39,658 --> 00:06:41,224
It's all a very
choreographed dance

183
00:06:41,226 --> 00:06:42,492
between two soon-to-be lovers.

184
00:06:43,661 --> 00:06:44,928
Ah...

185
00:06:44,930 --> 00:06:46,496
Cassie's underage.

186
00:06:46,498 --> 00:06:47,931
No, no, no, what-what?

187
00:06:47,933 --> 00:06:49,432
What are you
talking about?

188
00:06:49,434 --> 00:06:50,667
Cassie is not underage.

189
00:06:50,669 --> 00:06:52,569
Cassie is 21 years old.

190
00:06:52,571 --> 00:06:55,238
So, the champagne
I was purchasing

191
00:06:55,240 --> 00:06:57,674
was to celebrate
her legal drinking status.

192
00:06:57,676 --> 00:06:59,275
And to honor her full maturity.

193
00:07:00,679 --> 00:07:02,645
You see, I was waiting
for Cassie to mature.

194
00:07:02,647 --> 00:07:04,347
You know,
much like an ira.

195
00:07:04,349 --> 00:07:06,850
Y-you put the money in,
then you wait.

196
00:07:06,852 --> 00:07:09,486
And then you make
a hefty withdrawal.

197
00:07:11,690 --> 00:07:12,822
Okay, yeah, sure.

198
00:07:12,824 --> 00:07:15,492
Before full maturity,
yeah, ew.

199
00:07:15,494 --> 00:07:16,759
Yeah, but weren't
you just saying

200
00:07:16,761 --> 00:07:18,928
that you were doing deposits
before maturity?

201
00:07:18,930 --> 00:07:20,763
Uh, no, no, no, no.
See, that's where you're wrong.

202
00:07:20,765 --> 00:07:23,266
No, I was, uh,
between the ages of 18 and 21,

203
00:07:23,268 --> 00:07:24,767
simply making investments.

204
00:07:24,769 --> 00:07:26,336
But not for
early deposits?

205
00:07:26,338 --> 00:07:28,171
Well, deposits are
part of the withdrawal.

206
00:07:28,173 --> 00:07:30,640
Sometimes I can't make
a deposit at all.

207
00:07:30,642 --> 00:07:32,175
Ugh, come on, man.

208
00:07:32,177 --> 00:07:33,176
Just...

209
00:07:33,178 --> 00:07:34,511
Okay, just to be clear:

210
00:07:34,513 --> 00:07:35,979
A deposit's
a load, right?

211
00:07:35,981 --> 00:07:37,714
Yeah.
Well, yeah, yeah.

212
00:07:37,716 --> 00:07:38,715
That's not what
I'm talking about.

213
00:07:38,717 --> 00:07:40,283
No, it's a totally different...

214
00:07:40,285 --> 00:07:41,951
Are you sure?
No, with my... no.

215
00:07:41,953 --> 00:07:44,287
Look, not in this particular
case, it's not a lo...

216
00:07:44,289 --> 00:07:45,355
It's-it's...

217
00:07:47,558 --> 00:07:49,058
Yeah, it's a load.

218
00:07:49,060 --> 00:07:50,560
Yeah. I mean, yeah.
But that's not the point!

219
00:07:50,562 --> 00:07:51,794
That's not the point!
The point is:

220
00:07:51,796 --> 00:07:53,897
Dee has no rightful claim
to that ticket,

221
00:07:53,899 --> 00:07:55,398
and I'll prove it.

222
00:07:55,400 --> 00:07:57,166
You see, yesterday,

223
00:07:57,168 --> 00:07:58,902
after noticing
the contents of her purse,

224
00:07:58,904 --> 00:08:01,638
I decided to follow her
this morning.

225
00:08:01,640 --> 00:08:02,872
Cassie never gets her tip,

226
00:08:02,874 --> 00:08:04,541
does she, Dee?

227
00:08:04,543 --> 00:08:06,543
No. Because I refuse
to tip for coffee.

228
00:08:06,545 --> 00:08:08,545
I think it's dumb.
Uh-huh.

229
00:08:08,547 --> 00:08:10,079
So if you were buying
circus peanuts

230
00:08:10,081 --> 00:08:11,514
and candy sour worms
and cigarettes,

231
00:08:11,516 --> 00:08:13,182
I think we all know
what that means

232
00:08:13,184 --> 00:08:16,252
about the ticket in
question, don't we?

233
00:08:17,821 --> 00:08:19,656
I don't. Do you know?

234
00:08:19,658 --> 00:08:21,357
No.
Totally lost.

235
00:08:21,359 --> 00:08:23,927
That means she bought it
with my money!

236
00:08:23,929 --> 00:08:25,828
So, technically,
that ticket is mine!

237
00:08:25,830 --> 00:08:27,530
Okay, okay, okay.

238
00:08:27,532 --> 00:08:29,999
Now, let me sum up
the facts thus far.

239
00:08:30,001 --> 00:08:32,168
Miss Reynolds
bought the ticket

240
00:08:32,170 --> 00:08:33,670
with Mr. Reynolds' money.

241
00:08:33,672 --> 00:08:34,771
But Mr. MacDonald

242
00:08:34,773 --> 00:08:36,172
currently possesses it.

243
00:08:36,174 --> 00:08:39,709
Correct. But I deserve it,
and here's why.

244
00:08:39,711 --> 00:08:41,911
There we were, right?

245
00:08:41,913 --> 00:08:43,613
We were just walking
down the street,

246
00:08:43,615 --> 00:08:44,914
minding our own business.

247
00:08:44,916 --> 00:08:47,584
I'd just spotted
the perfect pile of dog shit,

248
00:08:47,586 --> 00:08:48,618
and naturally
I stepped in it.

249
00:08:48,620 --> 00:08:49,752
What?
Whoa, whoa, whoa.

250
00:08:49,754 --> 00:08:51,421
Okay, I'm a little confused.

251
00:08:51,423 --> 00:08:54,457
Why would you voluntarily
step into the dog feces?

252
00:08:54,459 --> 00:08:56,059
Well, I didn't, really...
You just said you did.

253
00:08:58,229 --> 00:08:59,596
All right, fine.

254
00:08:59,598 --> 00:09:01,965
I voluntarily
stepped in the dog shit

255
00:09:01,967 --> 00:09:06,035
so that I would smell
of dog shit. Happy?

256
00:09:06,037 --> 00:09:07,604
Less happy.
Why would it
make me happy?

257
00:09:07,606 --> 00:09:09,238
I was trying
to cover up the smell

258
00:09:09,240 --> 00:09:10,940
of the skunk
that I let spray me

259
00:09:10,942 --> 00:09:12,709
so that there would be
no questions.

260
00:09:12,711 --> 00:09:14,043
Well, now I have
more questions.
Of course you do.

261
00:09:14,045 --> 00:09:15,878
Why did you let
a skunk spray you?

262
00:09:15,880 --> 00:09:17,981
To cover the smell
of Cologne, man.
Oh, man. You know what?

263
00:09:17,983 --> 00:09:19,882
Go to the beginning.
Go to the first smell!

264
00:09:19,884 --> 00:09:21,651
The first smell that begat
all the other smells!

265
00:09:21,653 --> 00:09:23,753
The first smell was cigarettes!
I've been smoking with Dee!

266
00:09:23,755 --> 00:09:25,054
All right?
Fine, I said it.

267
00:09:25,056 --> 00:09:26,656
Oh. Oh, okay.
So, right.

268
00:09:26,658 --> 00:09:28,791
So you thought we would care
about the smell of cigarettes,

269
00:09:28,793 --> 00:09:30,660
but not the smell of
skunk or dog shit.
Mm. Mm-hmm.

270
00:09:30,662 --> 00:09:31,961
Well, it doesn't matter
anyway, all right,

271
00:09:31,963 --> 00:09:33,596
because I deserve the ticket.

272
00:09:33,598 --> 00:09:35,098
Because if the shit shoe's
a matcher,

273
00:09:35,100 --> 00:09:36,499
Charlie gets the scratcher!

274
00:09:36,501 --> 00:09:37,834
Oh... shit.
What the shit?
Come on.

275
00:09:37,836 --> 00:09:39,769
That shirt reeks!

276
00:09:39,771 --> 00:09:40,770
Is that what
that smell was?
Yeah.

277
00:09:40,772 --> 00:09:41,771
I thought it was just him.

278
00:09:41,773 --> 00:09:43,673
It does smell;
It smells very bad.

279
00:09:43,675 --> 00:09:45,408
But give me a cigarette;
I'll cover it up.

280
00:09:45,410 --> 00:09:47,310
But, look, if it smells
like shit, you must acquit.

281
00:09:47,312 --> 00:09:49,245
You know what? If everyone's
gonna be smoking on my dime...

282
00:09:49,247 --> 00:09:51,014
Look, nobody is debating
whether or not

283
00:09:51,016 --> 00:09:52,448
the shoe print is yours.

284
00:09:52,450 --> 00:09:53,683
We all know that it is,

285
00:09:53,685 --> 00:09:55,818
because everybody
saw you kick me.

286
00:09:55,820 --> 00:09:57,620
We're debating whether or not
you actually saved my life.

287
00:09:57,622 --> 00:10:00,023
Which you did not, because
I was just about to do

288
00:10:00,025 --> 00:10:01,924
a sweet backflip
to safety when you...
Oh, bullshit.

289
00:10:01,926 --> 00:10:03,459
He's never once flipped!

290
00:10:03,461 --> 00:10:05,028
Here we go.
I do flips all the time.

291
00:10:05,030 --> 00:10:06,295
You have never once flipped.
In the pool?

292
00:10:06,297 --> 00:10:07,830
Which you would not have done

293
00:10:07,832 --> 00:10:11,134
had I not warned you,
thereby saving your life!

294
00:10:11,136 --> 00:10:12,669
That is my ticket.

295
00:10:12,671 --> 00:10:14,437
Oh...

296
00:10:14,439 --> 00:10:15,838
Ridiculous.
"Backflip."

297
00:10:21,011 --> 00:10:23,546
There I was,
minding my own business,

298
00:10:23,548 --> 00:10:25,481
bird watching.

299
00:10:25,483 --> 00:10:26,783
Beautiful day,
isn't it?

300
00:10:26,785 --> 00:10:27,817
It's really
gorgeous and...

301
00:10:27,819 --> 00:10:29,719
Are those mirrors?

302
00:10:29,721 --> 00:10:31,821
No.
You creep.

303
00:10:31,823 --> 00:10:33,289
He wasn't really
bird watching,

304
00:10:33,291 --> 00:10:34,824
he was looking
up women's skirts.

305
00:10:34,826 --> 00:10:35,825
He peeps on women.
That's his move.

306
00:10:35,827 --> 00:10:36,859
He's disgusting.

307
00:10:36,861 --> 00:10:38,828
Like I said, bird watching.

308
00:10:38,830 --> 00:10:40,530
Not you.

309
00:10:40,532 --> 00:10:44,033
Now, the point is
that I said,

310
00:10:44,035 --> 00:10:45,535
"look out, faggot,"

311
00:10:45,537 --> 00:10:47,503
which were the words
that saved Mac's life.

312
00:10:47,505 --> 00:10:51,174
Thereby, I am entitled to
at least half that ticket.

313
00:10:51,176 --> 00:10:53,543
Well, why did you use the slur

314
00:10:53,545 --> 00:10:55,812
instead of just yelling
your friend's name?

315
00:10:55,814 --> 00:10:57,313
Well, there was
a lot going on.

316
00:10:57,315 --> 00:10:59,315
I needed something
that would cut through.

317
00:10:59,317 --> 00:11:01,250
Well, as soon as
I said the slur,

318
00:11:01,252 --> 00:11:04,721
everybody knew
to look at Mac.

319
00:11:04,723 --> 00:11:05,922
Look out, faggot!

320
00:11:05,924 --> 00:11:07,090
Mac knew to look.

321
00:11:07,092 --> 00:11:10,159
Dennis and Dee knew to look.

322
00:11:10,161 --> 00:11:12,395
Charlie, who kicked him
in the chest,

323
00:11:12,397 --> 00:11:14,263
knew to look.

324
00:11:14,265 --> 00:11:17,366
Hell, even the little kid
with the balloon

325
00:11:17,368 --> 00:11:18,768
knew where to look.

326
00:11:18,770 --> 00:11:22,405
Okay, it may have
been effective,

327
00:11:22,407 --> 00:11:24,540
but it was an
offensive slur.

328
00:11:24,542 --> 00:11:27,710
And a bigot should not be
entitled to a hero's payout.

329
00:11:27,712 --> 00:11:30,546
You're allowed to use
any language you want

330
00:11:30,548 --> 00:11:31,881
to save somebody's life.

331
00:11:31,883 --> 00:11:33,716
Really?
Any language?
Yes.

332
00:11:33,718 --> 00:11:35,718
You gonna let a man
die over a word?
Yeah, yeah.

333
00:11:35,720 --> 00:11:37,420
I mean, come on.
It's just a word.

334
00:11:37,422 --> 00:11:39,722
"Just a word."
Oh. Okay.

335
00:11:39,724 --> 00:11:41,290
Well, frank,
tell me something:

336
00:11:41,292 --> 00:11:43,292
If you were going to save
somebody else's life,

337
00:11:43,294 --> 00:11:45,928
you know, from a falling piano,
and you needed a word to just...

338
00:11:45,930 --> 00:11:47,864
To just cut
right through...
Mm-hmm.

339
00:11:47,866 --> 00:11:51,167
what word would you use
to call out to the arbiter?

340
00:11:55,606 --> 00:11:56,773
Uh...

341
00:11:56,775 --> 00:11:59,242
I suppose...

342
00:11:59,244 --> 00:12:01,410
Yeah, you know what?
We're, uh, we're treading

343
00:12:01,412 --> 00:12:02,779
on some dangerous
territory here, buddy.
Yeah.

344
00:12:02,781 --> 00:12:03,880
"Nigger"?

345
00:12:03,882 --> 00:12:05,114
Oh! Whoa, whoa!

346
00:12:05,116 --> 00:12:06,883
What, what?
Charlie, you can't

347
00:12:06,885 --> 00:12:09,051
use that word.
I'm trying to guess
the word that he was saying

348
00:12:09,053 --> 00:12:10,953
that he thought
frank was gonna say.
No, you don't say that ever.

349
00:12:10,955 --> 00:12:11,988
I was not using the word.

350
00:12:11,990 --> 00:12:13,222
Don't ever... that's not...

351
00:12:13,224 --> 00:12:14,257
You can't use that word, buddy.

352
00:12:14,259 --> 00:12:15,925
And yet, we've just
sort of been

353
00:12:15,927 --> 00:12:17,760
casually throwing
the f-word around

354
00:12:17,762 --> 00:12:18,928
Willy-nilly for
the past few days,

355
00:12:18,930 --> 00:12:20,596
and that hasn't
been a problem?

356
00:12:20,598 --> 00:12:23,666
Well, yeah, Mac, because the...
There's a very dark history

357
00:12:23,668 --> 00:12:25,902
associated with... the n-word.
Yeah.

358
00:12:25,904 --> 00:12:28,604
Did you know that a faggot
is a burning bundle of sticks

359
00:12:28,606 --> 00:12:30,673
on top of which they used
to burn homosexuals?

360
00:12:30,675 --> 00:12:33,342
So, basically, when you
call someone a "faggot,"

361
00:12:33,344 --> 00:12:35,812
you are saying that they
should be burned at the stake.

362
00:12:36,814 --> 00:12:39,015
Is that right?

363
00:12:40,819 --> 00:12:42,652
That's pretty dark.
Yeah, yeah.

364
00:12:42,654 --> 00:12:43,920
Well, maybe there are
a few words

365
00:12:43,922 --> 00:12:44,921
that we shouldn't be
throwing around.
Yep.

366
00:12:44,923 --> 00:12:45,988
Yeah.
Yeah.

367
00:12:45,990 --> 00:12:46,989
What about "cunt"?
Oh!

368
00:12:46,991 --> 00:12:47,957
We can't lose that!

369
00:12:47,959 --> 00:12:49,358
Yeah, it's a good word.
What?

370
00:12:49,360 --> 00:12:50,626
That's tough.
It's a great word.

371
00:12:50,628 --> 00:12:51,694
And it's just not offensive.

372
00:12:51,696 --> 00:12:53,296
Especially, uh, directed towards

373
00:12:53,298 --> 00:12:55,932
a woman when you're
trying to insult her.

374
00:12:55,934 --> 00:12:58,034
When you're trying to make
a woman feel small.

375
00:12:58,036 --> 00:13:00,036
That's extremely offensive!

376
00:13:00,038 --> 00:13:01,470
Come on, you could
yell "penis" at me,

377
00:13:01,472 --> 00:13:03,272
and I'd be fine with it.
Well, all right, fine.

378
00:13:03,274 --> 00:13:04,841
Well, then, we're gonna take
away your favorite word.

379
00:13:04,843 --> 00:13:06,042
Yeah.
Yeah.

380
00:13:06,044 --> 00:13:07,043
What, "cocksucker"?
Yeah.
Yeah.

381
00:13:07,045 --> 00:13:08,311
What's wrong with that?

382
00:13:08,313 --> 00:13:10,813
You can't say "cocksucker"
if we can't say "cunt."

383
00:13:10,815 --> 00:13:12,014
I find it offensive
that the idea

384
00:13:12,016 --> 00:13:13,850
of sucking cocks
is offensive.

385
00:13:13,852 --> 00:13:16,385
Exactly. There's nothing
offensive about sucking cock.

386
00:13:16,387 --> 00:13:18,020
Half the population
loves to suck cock.

387
00:13:18,022 --> 00:13:19,388
The other half
of the population,

388
00:13:19,390 --> 00:13:20,723
they love getting
their cock sucked.

389
00:13:20,725 --> 00:13:21,891
It's kind of a win-win.

390
00:13:21,893 --> 00:13:23,459
We're getting off
the point, okay?

391
00:13:23,461 --> 00:13:27,496
In terms of the ticket,
I'm calling bullshit on frank,

392
00:13:27,498 --> 00:13:29,832
because, for some reason,
he thinks that I'm gay,

393
00:13:29,834 --> 00:13:31,834
and that is why he
called me the f-word,

394
00:13:31,836 --> 00:13:33,035
which makes him a bigot.

395
00:13:33,037 --> 00:13:34,737
Oh, wait.

396
00:13:34,739 --> 00:13:36,005
Uh, catch me up here.

397
00:13:36,007 --> 00:13:37,640
Now, you're not gay?

398
00:13:37,642 --> 00:13:38,908
Obviously not.

399
00:13:38,910 --> 00:13:40,543
Okay. Interesting.

400
00:13:40,545 --> 00:13:43,679
So, Mr. Reynolds, um, simply,

401
00:13:43,681 --> 00:13:45,348
was just trying
to disrespect you.

402
00:13:45,350 --> 00:13:47,250
He wasn't trying
to make a comment

403
00:13:47,252 --> 00:13:49,218
about your sexual orientation?

404
00:13:49,220 --> 00:13:51,487
No, well, see, here's where
things get just a little bit

405
00:13:51,489 --> 00:13:55,358
tricky, because frank thinks
Mac is gay because...

406
00:13:55,360 --> 00:13:56,926
Mac is gay.
Yeah.

407
00:13:56,928 --> 00:13:58,928
What? What-what are
you talking about?

408
00:13:58,930 --> 00:14:00,529
Enough with this.

409
00:14:00,531 --> 00:14:01,898
This is boring.
I mean, he's into
the closet,

410
00:14:01,900 --> 00:14:02,932
he's out of the closet.
Yeah, yeah.

411
00:14:02,934 --> 00:14:04,033
We don't like you
either way.

412
00:14:04,035 --> 00:14:05,902
Oh, look, now, I
care about my body.

413
00:14:05,904 --> 00:14:07,904
So now they become, like,
obsessed with me being gay.
Obsessed?

414
00:14:07,906 --> 00:14:09,171
We don't care!
We're the ones who don't care.

415
00:14:09,173 --> 00:14:10,339
Okay. All right,
hold on.

416
00:14:10,341 --> 00:14:12,108
Dee, let me just...
Let me put this to bed.

417
00:14:12,110 --> 00:14:14,110
Okay, Mac, we're
in support of it.

418
00:14:14,112 --> 00:14:15,678
So, just come on
out of the closet

419
00:14:15,680 --> 00:14:16,712
and be done with it.
You'll feel better.

420
00:14:16,714 --> 00:14:17,914
You'll feel better.
Come on.

421
00:14:17,916 --> 00:14:21,050
I honestly have no idea
what you're talking about.

422
00:14:21,052 --> 00:14:23,386
Mac, Mac...

423
00:14:25,123 --> 00:14:26,389
We found the bike.

424
00:14:26,391 --> 00:14:28,190
Yeah, so?

425
00:14:28,192 --> 00:14:31,127
The bike in
the basement?

426
00:14:32,095 --> 00:14:34,030
What about it?

427
00:14:35,899 --> 00:14:38,067
Oh, Mac.

428
00:14:38,069 --> 00:14:39,602
Mac,

429
00:14:39,604 --> 00:14:40,970
don't make me go get the bike.
Oh.

430
00:14:40,972 --> 00:14:42,905
I've got
nothing to hide.

431
00:14:42,907 --> 00:14:44,774
Just, uh, go
get the bike.

432
00:14:44,776 --> 00:14:46,976
I'm-a go get the bike.

433
00:14:52,049 --> 00:14:55,484
I would like to present
into evidence, uh...

434
00:14:56,988 --> 00:14:59,722
Mac's bike.

435
00:14:59,724 --> 00:15:02,124
What? It's an awesome
workout bike.

436
00:15:02,126 --> 00:15:03,125
What's the big deal?

437
00:15:03,127 --> 00:15:04,627
Okay.

438
00:15:04,629 --> 00:15:07,330
Mac, why don't you go ahead
and operate the bike.

439
00:15:07,332 --> 00:15:08,597
Yeah.

440
00:15:08,599 --> 00:15:10,132
Sure.

441
00:15:10,134 --> 00:15:12,735
No problem. Just-just like
any other workout bike.

442
00:15:12,737 --> 00:15:13,736
Well...

443
00:15:13,738 --> 00:15:15,204
You pedal...

444
00:15:18,942 --> 00:15:20,843
Uh, there you go.

445
00:15:20,845 --> 00:15:21,844
Outrageous.

446
00:15:21,846 --> 00:15:22,945
Yeah, there it is.

447
00:15:22,947 --> 00:15:25,581
I mean, it's just
the craziest...

448
00:15:25,583 --> 00:15:26,782
All right, all right,
all right.

449
00:15:26,784 --> 00:15:28,017
Okay, I...

450
00:15:28,019 --> 00:15:29,452
I know what
you're thinking, okay?

451
00:15:29,454 --> 00:15:31,354
But it is not
what it looks like.

452
00:15:31,356 --> 00:15:33,022
Yeah, what it looks like

453
00:15:33,024 --> 00:15:35,324
is that you are fucking yourself
with a dildo bike.

454
00:15:35,326 --> 00:15:36,325
I mean, you got
the bike shorts

455
00:15:36,327 --> 00:15:37,593
with the slits in
them, in the...

456
00:15:37,595 --> 00:15:40,096
Oh, the-the ones in the back?
That's for air flow.

457
00:15:40,098 --> 00:15:41,263
This is grotesque.

458
00:15:41,265 --> 00:15:42,598
No, you're
not understanding.

459
00:15:42,600 --> 00:15:44,367
I modded out
a regular workout bike,

460
00:15:44,369 --> 00:15:46,168
to create the optimal workout.

461
00:15:46,170 --> 00:15:48,471
And added a penis.
Yeah.

462
00:15:48,473 --> 00:15:50,840
Oh... I see.

463
00:15:50,842 --> 00:15:53,209
I see where you guys
are getting off the rails.

464
00:15:53,211 --> 00:15:54,276
That's not a penis.

465
00:15:54,278 --> 00:15:55,678
Oh.

466
00:15:55,680 --> 00:15:57,013
It's a fist.

467
00:15:57,015 --> 00:15:58,781
Uh...

468
00:15:58,783 --> 00:16:00,783
I call it
the ass pounder 4000.

469
00:16:00,785 --> 00:16:02,551
And it works like this.
Uh, no...

470
00:16:02,553 --> 00:16:05,021
Imagine you're riding
up a steep hill,

471
00:16:05,023 --> 00:16:07,790
and you've already been working
super hard,

472
00:16:07,792 --> 00:16:09,658
and you're sweating
and you're tired.

473
00:16:09,660 --> 00:16:11,794
What do you do when
you're tired? You want to rest.

474
00:16:11,796 --> 00:16:13,029
You go to sit down,

475
00:16:13,031 --> 00:16:15,131
it pushes you right back up
in your workout.

476
00:16:15,133 --> 00:16:17,066
The ass pounder 4000
will never let you rest.

477
00:16:17,068 --> 00:16:19,135
Yeah, see?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, we got it.

478
00:16:19,137 --> 00:16:20,369
That's the way it works.
We got it.

479
00:16:20,371 --> 00:16:23,039
Now, I even have
an amazing tagline.

480
00:16:23,041 --> 00:16:26,008
"The ass pounder:
Never stop pumping."

481
00:16:31,915 --> 00:16:33,916
Well, um...

482
00:16:33,918 --> 00:16:35,484
Think we've
seen enough.

483
00:16:35,486 --> 00:16:37,053
I've certainly
learned something.

484
00:16:37,055 --> 00:16:40,389
This... this has nothing
to do with being gay.

485
00:16:40,391 --> 00:16:42,058
This is just the work
of a man who's

486
00:16:42,060 --> 00:16:43,426
an extreme
sexual deviant.

487
00:16:43,428 --> 00:16:44,927
Gay or not.

488
00:16:44,929 --> 00:16:46,896
Can I have one of those?
Yeah, whatever,

489
00:16:46,898 --> 00:16:48,164
yeah, whatever, dude.
Oh, whatever.

490
00:16:48,166 --> 00:16:50,032
You know, you guys are just
jealous because I've got

491
00:16:50,034 --> 00:16:52,234
a million-dollar idea
and I've got the ticket.

492
00:16:52,236 --> 00:16:54,070
You don't have
the ticket yet, bitch!

493
00:16:54,072 --> 00:16:55,271
I bought the ticket.

494
00:16:55,273 --> 00:16:57,239
What are you talking
about? Are you crazy?

495
00:16:58,910 --> 00:17:00,743
Quiet! Quiet!

496
00:17:00,745 --> 00:17:02,278
Quiet!

497
00:17:02,280 --> 00:17:04,280
Now, I've heard from
everybody involved,

498
00:17:04,282 --> 00:17:06,549
and I will make my decision.

499
00:17:06,551 --> 00:17:08,317
But let me make
one thing clear.

500
00:17:09,753 --> 00:17:12,088
In order for this
to be entirely just,

501
00:17:12,090 --> 00:17:16,926
I will make my decision based
on fairness and compromise.

502
00:17:16,928 --> 00:17:18,094
You understand?

503
00:17:21,364 --> 00:17:24,100
Okay, I think I'm all caught up.

504
00:17:24,102 --> 00:17:26,102
All right,
so what's the verdict?
Yeah, what do you got?

505
00:17:26,104 --> 00:17:29,271
I think it's actually
pretty straightforward.

506
00:17:29,273 --> 00:17:31,273
Mr. MacDonald is in possession
of the ticket,

507
00:17:31,275 --> 00:17:32,374
so he has ownership.

508
00:17:32,376 --> 00:17:34,143
However, he
would not be

509
00:17:34,145 --> 00:17:37,146
in possession if his life
were not saved by Mr. Reynolds,

510
00:17:37,148 --> 00:17:40,082
who set off the chain
of events saving him.

511
00:17:40,084 --> 00:17:42,918
So I see it as a 50/50 split.

512
00:17:42,920 --> 00:17:44,787
Are you kidding me?
I'm a hero!

513
00:17:44,789 --> 00:17:45,988
Oh! You bitch!
50/50 split?

514
00:17:45,990 --> 00:17:47,256
out of the way!
Nothing for the man

515
00:17:47,258 --> 00:17:49,091
who paid for the ticket?
I bought it!

516
00:17:49,093 --> 00:17:51,560
And this bigot here is
gonna get a hero's payout?

517
00:17:51,562 --> 00:17:54,296
He may be a bigot and
he did use disgusting speech,

518
00:17:54,298 --> 00:17:55,731
but it's not technically

519
00:17:55,733 --> 00:17:59,135
hate speech since Mr. MacDonald
does not claim to be gay.

520
00:17:59,137 --> 00:18:01,137
Oh.

521
00:18:01,139 --> 00:18:04,273
Oh, does that mean if I claim
to be gay, I get all of it?

522
00:18:04,275 --> 00:18:06,275
Well, um, y-yes.

523
00:18:06,277 --> 00:18:08,344
You would be entitled
to keep all of it.

524
00:18:08,346 --> 00:18:09,512
I claim to be gay!

525
00:18:09,514 --> 00:18:11,814
No!
No, no, no, no.
Now you're gay?

526
00:18:11,816 --> 00:18:13,349
There's a history
behind it.

527
00:18:13,351 --> 00:18:16,619
Everybody knows it. Even
the balloon kid knew it.

528
00:18:13,351 --> 00:18:23,351
I've been gay
forever.

529
00:18:16,621 --> 00:18:18,687
Soon as he gets that ticket,
he's going back in the closet.

530
00:18:18,689 --> 00:18:19,922
Yeah. This isn't fair.
Mark my words.

531
00:18:19,924 --> 00:18:21,357
If he's gonna do it,
he's got to stay out,

532
00:18:21,359 --> 00:18:22,358
which he won't,
I guarantee you.

533
00:18:22,360 --> 00:18:23,959
Fine. Whatever.
Yeah. I'm out!

534
00:18:23,961 --> 00:18:25,494
Totally out. I'm gonna...

535
00:18:25,496 --> 00:18:27,329
Hey, uh, excuse me, would
you please do the honors

536
00:18:27,331 --> 00:18:29,431
on my ticket, please?

537
00:18:29,433 --> 00:18:31,834
It's probably worthless.
Okay. Sure.

538
00:18:31,836 --> 00:18:34,370
Let's, uh...
Let's see what we have here.

539
00:18:34,372 --> 00:18:35,204
Okay.

540
00:18:37,174 --> 00:18:38,440
Wow.

541
00:18:38,442 --> 00:18:39,508
What?

542
00:18:39,510 --> 00:18:41,544
What is it?
Well, you're a winner.

543
00:18:41,546 --> 00:18:43,612
What? How much?

544
00:18:43,614 --> 00:18:45,714
$10,000.

545
00:18:45,716 --> 00:18:46,815
What?

546
00:18:46,817 --> 00:18:49,051
No! No!
Oh, my god!

547
00:18:49,053 --> 00:18:50,319
Gay Mac rules!

548
00:18:50,321 --> 00:18:52,655
Bullshit!
Gay-gay, rich Mac!

549
00:18:52,657 --> 00:18:55,324
All right, if you will just sign
this, releasing the ticket

550
00:18:55,326 --> 00:18:58,294
and agreeing to my ruling.
Don't mind if I do.

551
00:18:58,296 --> 00:19:00,996
I wonder what I'm gonna do
with all this money.

552
00:19:00,998 --> 00:19:02,531
Maybe start an llc.

553
00:19:02,533 --> 00:19:04,200
Ass pounder 4000?

554
00:19:04,202 --> 00:19:06,402
It's all going right
into the product.

555
00:19:06,404 --> 00:19:09,071
Yeah, yeah, sign the paper so
you can go back in the closet.

556
00:19:09,073 --> 00:19:10,206
Yeah.
Go ahead.

557
00:19:10,208 --> 00:19:12,208
You go back in.
Go ahead.
Huh?

558
00:19:12,210 --> 00:19:14,210
Well, you signed the thing.
You got your money.

559
00:19:14,212 --> 00:19:16,212
Just go back in the closet.
Just get it over with.

560
00:19:16,214 --> 00:19:19,014
We know you're gonna do it,
so you might as well just do it.

561
00:19:19,016 --> 00:19:20,816
Yeah. Yeah.

562
00:19:20,818 --> 00:19:25,421
I don't know. Maybe I'll...
Maybe I'll stay out.

563
00:19:25,423 --> 00:19:27,823
Really?
Yeah.
It doesn't matter.

564
00:19:27,825 --> 00:19:30,226
You can just go back in.
You signed the paper.
Y-yeah.

565
00:19:30,228 --> 00:19:31,393
I mean,
you got your money.

566
00:19:31,395 --> 00:19:34,263
No, I think I'm out now.

567
00:19:34,265 --> 00:19:37,066
Yeah. I'm... I'm gay.

568
00:19:37,068 --> 00:19:39,702
Actually feels
pretty good.

569
00:19:39,704 --> 00:19:41,237
See ya, guys.

570
00:19:47,244 --> 00:19:49,245
Wow.
Finally.

571
00:19:49,247 --> 00:19:51,447
Eh, good for him, right?
Yeah, good for him. I'm...

572
00:19:51,449 --> 00:19:53,282
Absolutely.
Guess I'm happy for him.

573
00:19:53,284 --> 00:19:54,917
Yeah, it's a
relief, honestly.

574
00:19:54,919 --> 00:19:57,453
All right, if, uh,
you'll just take care of this,

575
00:19:57,455 --> 00:19:59,255
then, uh, we'll be all done.

576
00:19:59,257 --> 00:20:01,457
What's this?
That would be a bill.

577
00:20:01,459 --> 00:20:02,524
Ooh.
Oh, money stuff.

578
00:20:02,526 --> 00:20:04,026
Uh...
That goes to frank.

579
00:20:04,028 --> 00:20:05,728
I know it's steep,
but you did go through

580
00:20:05,730 --> 00:20:09,365
three arbiters,
and you've been here 17 hours.

581
00:20:09,367 --> 00:20:10,899
Yeah. I'm exhausted.
Yikes, yikes.

582
00:20:10,901 --> 00:20:12,401
What's-what's it add
up to there, frank?

583
00:20:12,403 --> 00:20:14,937
$9,986.

584
00:20:14,939 --> 00:20:17,139
Yikes.
Holy cow, you guys
aren't cheap.

585
00:20:17,141 --> 00:20:18,440
You guys aren't cheap.

586
00:20:18,442 --> 00:20:20,709
The arbitration
was Mac's idea.

587
00:20:20,711 --> 00:20:23,045
Let's let him pay for it.
That's a great idea.

588
00:20:23,047 --> 00:20:24,813
That's fair.
In fairness' sake.
Yeah.

589
00:20:24,815 --> 00:20:27,316
Yeah, he's got the money for it.
He's got the
money now. Yeah.

590
00:20:27,318 --> 00:20:29,718
But maybe let's make him
pay it tomorrow, you know?

591
00:20:29,720 --> 00:20:31,754
L-let's let him have this.
Yeah. Yeah.

592
00:20:31,756 --> 00:20:35,391
Poor guy did just come out
over a $14 scratcher.

593
00:20:35,393 --> 00:20:36,659
- That's all that's left?
- Yeah.

594
00:20:36,661 --> 00:20:38,494
Oh, no.
That sucks.

595
00:20:38,496 --> 00:20:39,928
Oh, no.

596
00:20:39,930 --> 00:20:41,297
Tell you what, man,
I am happy for him,

597
00:20:41,299 --> 00:20:43,565
but I do still hate him.
Oh, yeah.

598
00:20:43,567 --> 00:20:46,068
It's not a gay or
straight thing, is it?
No, no, no, no, no.

599
00:20:46,070 --> 00:20:47,136
It's a Mac thing.

600
00:21:28,978 --> 00:21:31,046
Captioned by
media access group at wgbh

601
00:21:33,650 --> 00:21:35,984
look, as we all know,
everything is about
emotion with women.

602
00:21:35,986 --> 00:21:37,052
Right, Dee?
What?

603
00:21:37,054 --> 00:21:38,821
Oh, my god! Whoa!
Whoa.

604
00:21:38,823 --> 00:21:40,155
All right, Dee.
Relax.

605
00:21:40,157 --> 00:21:42,224
We're trying to have
a rational conversation.

606
00:21:43,026 --> 00:21:44,693
Sunny. All new.

607
00:21:44,695 --> 00:21:47,763
Wednesdays at 10:00.
Only on fxx.

608
00:21:51,668 --> 00:21:55,738
I am a very dangerous man

609
00:21:55,740 --> 00:21:57,106
to know.

610
00:21:59,909 --> 00:22:04,046
Taboo.
All new Tuesdays at 10:00 on fx.

611
00:22:08,651 --> 00:22:11,053
Man seeking woman.

612
00:22:11,055 --> 00:22:13,222
All new, wednesdays at 10:30.

613
00:22:13,224 --> 00:22:14,890
Only on fxx.

614
00:22:16,860 --> 00:22:18,894
Careful, honey.

615
00:22:18,896 --> 00:22:20,496
Oh.

616
00:22:22,532 --> 00:22:24,400
Mmm.
What's this?

617
00:22:24,402 --> 00:22:26,101
It's still good.

618
00:22:26,103 --> 00:22:27,903
Baskets.

619
00:22:27,905 --> 00:22:30,939
All new Thursdays at 10:00.
On fx.

620
00:22:34,778 --> 00:22:36,578
So, is he crazy?

621
00:22:36,580 --> 00:22:39,581
Man #2:
I think he believes
he's mentally ill.

622
00:22:39,583 --> 00:22:42,518
But at the same time,
part of him knows...

623
00:22:44,754 --> 00:22:46,155
The power's real.

624
00:22:47,757 --> 00:22:49,291
Legion.

625
00:22:49,293 --> 00:22:51,994
All new wednesdays at 10:00
on fx.

626
00:22:54,230 --> 00:22:56,799
Take an hour
of his time.

627
00:22:56,801 --> 00:22:59,401
Wow. Look at
Stan's yard.

628
00:22:59,403 --> 00:23:01,537
Someone's been busy.

629
00:23:01,539 --> 00:23:04,640
Clearly not in ours.
Maybe Henry can do
some work today.

630
00:23:04,642 --> 00:23:06,742
Yeah.

631
00:23:06,744 --> 00:23:09,244
I forget your back
is always bad
this time of year.

632
00:23:09,246 --> 00:23:10,879
Only when there
are leaves—

633
00:23:15,084 --> 00:23:17,119
when did you
wash this last?