1 00:00:02,013 --> 00:00:03,834 Okay, now put your arms back. 2 00:00:03,934 --> 00:00:05,903 You're like a... you're like a rocket ship, okay? 3 00:00:06,003 --> 00:00:07,072 Now left. 4 00:00:07,172 --> 00:00:09,574 Now right. Now left. Now right. Now go lower. 5 00:00:09,674 --> 00:00:11,676 - Oh, come on. Come... - Can you guys go lower? 6 00:00:11,709 --> 00:00:13,578 Dennis, is this really necessary? 7 00:00:13,678 --> 00:00:15,846 Mac, you have the tendon dexterity of a sow, 8 00:00:15,880 --> 00:00:18,083 so yes, it's necessary. Guys, we're about to embark 9 00:00:18,183 --> 00:00:20,885 on the most important 24 hours of our lives here. 10 00:00:20,985 --> 00:00:22,987 Okay, it's important to stay limber and loose. 11 00:00:23,020 --> 00:00:24,389 Uh, yes. Very good, Charlie. 12 00:00:24,422 --> 00:00:26,891 - Can we just start? - No, we can't just start, okay? 13 00:00:26,991 --> 00:00:28,759 Preparation is the key to victory. 14 00:00:28,793 --> 00:00:30,395 - Oh. - Yes, Charlie. 15 00:00:30,495 --> 00:00:31,629 You're really nailing this today. 16 00:00:31,729 --> 00:00:32,997 I got my eye on you. Okay. 17 00:00:33,030 --> 00:00:35,333 Now, does everybody know what they're supposed to do? 18 00:00:35,366 --> 00:00:37,735 Yes. Dennis, I know exactly what you told us to do. 19 00:00:37,835 --> 00:00:39,337 I've memorized it. I know where to be 20 00:00:39,370 --> 00:00:40,871 and when to be at all times. 21 00:00:40,971 --> 00:00:42,273 Okay, good. Yeah. 22 00:00:42,307 --> 00:00:43,741 Needy and desperate for approval, 23 00:00:43,841 --> 00:00:45,410 but, uh, good. Charlie. 24 00:00:46,104 --> 00:00:47,111 Now look at that. You see that? 25 00:00:47,131 --> 00:00:49,547 With one little gesture, he tells me everything I need to know. 26 00:00:49,647 --> 00:00:51,716 That wordless display of confidence earns my confidence. 27 00:00:51,816 --> 00:00:53,351 Don't. I did it already. 28 00:00:53,384 --> 00:00:54,585 You're so desperate. 29 00:00:54,685 --> 00:00:56,921 - I thought it was cool. - Okay, now, listen. Guys, guys. 30 00:00:57,021 --> 00:00:59,290 We have exactly one day to pull this off, 31 00:00:59,324 --> 00:01:02,227 so everything needs to be executed to absolute perfection. 32 00:01:02,327 --> 00:01:06,264 And, gentlemen, if we do that, well, the world is our oyster. 33 00:01:06,297 --> 00:01:07,998 Don't say "oyster." Say "clam." 34 00:01:08,912 --> 00:01:10,135 - The world's our clam? - Yeah. 35 00:01:10,168 --> 00:01:11,802 - I like clams better. - You like clams? Well, 36 00:01:11,902 --> 00:01:13,804 - that doesn't sound very good. - They're both shellfish, 37 00:01:13,904 --> 00:01:15,806 - so it's kind of the same, isn't it? - Yeah. One's disgusting, 38 00:01:15,840 --> 00:01:18,176 - and one's delicious. - Yeah, okay. 39 00:01:18,276 --> 00:01:20,145 - I personally prefer barnacles. You know what I mean? - Oh. 40 00:01:20,178 --> 00:01:21,446 - Yeah, there's some meat in there. - I like abalone. 41 00:01:21,479 --> 00:01:22,447 - Well, okay, guys. - Abalone's interesting. 42 00:01:22,480 --> 00:01:24,014 - I'm a clam person. - Seagulls... 43 00:01:24,115 --> 00:01:25,150 - Oh, mussels. What about mussels? - All right, guys. 44 00:01:25,183 --> 00:01:27,152 Let's not get into a whole thing. We're getting derailed, okay? Uh... 45 00:01:27,252 --> 00:01:28,486 We can spend the whole day talking 46 00:01:28,519 --> 00:01:30,488 about which shell creatures we do or don't prefer 47 00:01:30,588 --> 00:01:31,822 or enjoy at any given moment. 48 00:01:31,856 --> 00:01:33,090 That's not what we're doing here. 49 00:01:33,191 --> 00:01:34,525 Okay, look, we put in the work. 50 00:01:34,625 --> 00:01:37,528 Right? We're ready. We've done our dry run. 51 00:01:37,628 --> 00:01:38,963 And if we put our minds to it, 52 00:01:38,996 --> 00:01:42,167 nothing, absolutely nothing can stand in our way. 53 00:01:42,267 --> 00:01:43,968 - World is our clam. - Bring it in, boys. Oh! 54 00:01:49,707 --> 00:01:50,841 - First things first, we got to ditch Dee. - Oh, shit. 55 00:01:50,941 --> 00:01:51,842 - Yeah, let's ditch her. - Guys, 56 00:01:51,942 --> 00:01:54,011 I am so excited to get started. 57 00:01:54,111 --> 00:01:55,346 Get started on what? 58 00:01:55,446 --> 00:01:57,648 Oh, my God. You forgot. 59 00:01:57,748 --> 00:02:00,151 Oh, that makes it so much better. 60 00:02:00,251 --> 00:02:01,486 Oh, guys. 61 00:02:01,519 --> 00:02:04,021 From noon today until noon tomorrow, 62 00:02:04,121 --> 00:02:05,690 it's Dee Day. 63 00:02:05,790 --> 00:02:06,991 - What? - Oh, my God. 64 00:02:07,091 --> 00:02:08,125 - No. - I completely forgot. - Oh, shit. 65 00:02:08,159 --> 00:02:09,294 - No, I... - No, wait, wait, wait. 66 00:02:09,327 --> 00:02:10,995 I know, I know. See, we did all your days, 67 00:02:11,095 --> 00:02:12,330 and now it's my turn. 68 00:02:12,430 --> 00:02:14,232 So that means, for the next 24 hours, 69 00:02:14,332 --> 00:02:16,066 you got to do everything I tell you to do, 70 00:02:16,167 --> 00:02:17,402 and you got to listen to me. 71 00:02:17,502 --> 00:02:19,737 And you can't complain, otherwise you're gonna get 72 00:02:19,837 --> 00:02:20,866 one of these. 73 00:02:21,967 --> 00:02:23,408 And I tack another day on. 74 00:02:23,508 --> 00:02:25,176 - Dee, please, please don't do this to us. - Oh, you better 75 00:02:25,276 --> 00:02:27,077 cram your insults in now while you got... 76 00:02:27,178 --> 00:02:28,746 oh, few more seconds left, guys. 77 00:02:28,846 --> 00:02:29,980 You... 78 00:02:30,014 --> 00:02:31,225 Dee's a bird! 79 00:02:32,149 --> 00:02:34,018 - Dee Day begins in three... - Dee's a bird! You're a bird! 80 00:02:34,118 --> 00:02:35,386 - ... two... - You're a bird! - I hate you, bird! 81 00:02:35,486 --> 00:02:36,521 - You're a stupid...! - ... one. 82 00:03:01,807 --> 00:03:05,015 As we all know, you guys just love to talk and talk about 83 00:03:05,115 --> 00:03:08,085 why men this and why God that and on and on and on and on. 84 00:03:08,185 --> 00:03:10,755 And I-I can't even begin to count the number 85 00:03:10,855 --> 00:03:13,090 of pointless monologues I've been forced to sit through. 86 00:03:13,123 --> 00:03:15,159 But not today. Today, it's you 87 00:03:15,192 --> 00:03:17,295 who will be forced to sit and just listen. 88 00:03:17,395 --> 00:03:18,963 And my first topic? 89 00:03:19,839 --> 00:03:21,065 My feelings. 90 00:03:21,165 --> 00:03:22,733 - That's fair. - Yeah, I'm into it. - Thank you. 91 00:03:22,833 --> 00:03:24,068 - I'm excited. - Thought you would be. 92 00:03:24,168 --> 00:03:25,803 Now, when I wake up in the morning, I feel sad. 93 00:03:25,903 --> 00:03:27,272 And I feel sad for a very long... 94 00:03:27,740 --> 00:03:28,749 Today of all days, 95 00:03:28,839 --> 00:03:30,308 and now I'm being forced to listen to her feelings? 96 00:03:30,408 --> 00:03:32,643 I won't do it. And who cares about her feelings anyway? 97 00:03:32,743 --> 00:03:34,044 Nobody, that's who. 98 00:03:34,144 --> 00:03:36,647 What about my feelings? Now, that's interesting, okay? 99 00:03:36,747 --> 00:03:38,749 Plus, the plan. We can't afford to waste a second, 100 00:03:38,849 --> 00:03:40,685 and these pea-brains are probably forgetting their parts 101 00:03:40,718 --> 00:03:42,787 with every second that passes by. 102 00:03:42,820 --> 00:03:45,189 Uh-oh. I'm forgetting my part of the plan 103 00:03:45,222 --> 00:03:46,791 with every second that goes by. 104 00:03:46,824 --> 00:03:48,493 Dennis is gonna yell at me again. 105 00:03:48,593 --> 00:03:50,995 Hey, why was Charlie outshining me earlier? 106 00:03:51,095 --> 00:03:52,330 I mean, what's that all about? 107 00:03:52,430 --> 00:03:54,265 It's like he wants something from Dennis. 108 00:03:54,365 --> 00:03:55,600 But what? 109 00:03:55,633 --> 00:03:57,802 Attention? Love? 110 00:03:57,835 --> 00:03:59,904 Why'd he throw me that look? Does he want to replace me? 111 00:04:00,004 --> 00:04:03,073 Is that what's going on? What the hell does he want? 112 00:04:03,173 --> 00:04:04,675 I'm pretty sure Dennis has candy. 113 00:04:04,775 --> 00:04:06,311 I heard a crinkle in his pocket 114 00:04:06,411 --> 00:04:08,413 that sounded like the wrapper of a candy. 115 00:04:08,513 --> 00:04:10,147 I gave Mac a look to let him know 116 00:04:10,180 --> 00:04:12,182 that I figured out Dennis has candy. 117 00:04:12,283 --> 00:04:14,184 Hopefully, if we nail this plan, 118 00:04:14,285 --> 00:04:16,086 he'll give us some candy. 119 00:04:16,186 --> 00:04:18,155 I want that candy. 120 00:04:18,255 --> 00:04:19,824 You know who eats raw shellfish? 121 00:04:19,924 --> 00:04:21,526 Seagulls, that's who. 122 00:04:21,626 --> 00:04:23,694 Clams you bake. Clams you fry. 123 00:04:23,794 --> 00:04:26,497 Pop a rubber band around them, stuff them full of bread, 124 00:04:26,597 --> 00:04:28,533 boil them shits for an hour. 125 00:04:28,633 --> 00:04:31,502 There's a million ways you can prepare a clam. 126 00:04:31,602 --> 00:04:34,038 "Make the world your clam." 127 00:04:34,138 --> 00:04:36,173 Just sounds better. 128 00:04:36,206 --> 00:04:37,642 And that, I believe, is the reason 129 00:04:37,675 --> 00:04:39,477 for all of this toxic masculinity. 130 00:04:39,577 --> 00:04:41,479 - Would you agree? - Huh? 131 00:04:41,579 --> 00:04:42,980 - Yes. - Yeah. Well... - A-Absolutely. 132 00:04:43,080 --> 00:04:44,515 - Yeah, absolutely. - Yeah. Everything... - Absolutely. 133 00:04:44,615 --> 00:04:46,150 Everything you were saying, we were totally listening. 134 00:04:46,183 --> 00:04:47,485 - That's totally true. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 135 00:04:47,518 --> 00:04:50,054 Okay, cool. Um, I'm gonna go take a quick squirt 136 00:04:50,154 --> 00:04:51,489 'cause that beer just went right through me, 137 00:04:51,589 --> 00:04:53,223 and then we'll move on to the next thing. 138 00:04:53,324 --> 00:04:54,559 - Thanks, Dee. - Sounds fun. - All right, Dee. 139 00:04:54,659 --> 00:04:55,860 - Sounds fun. - Yeah, Dee, this is gonna be great. 140 00:04:55,960 --> 00:04:57,161 - I'm looking forward to it. - This is really cool. 141 00:04:57,261 --> 00:04:58,496 - So excited. So excited. - I'm enjoying this a lot. 142 00:04:58,596 --> 00:04:59,664 Goddamn bird! 143 00:04:59,764 --> 00:05:01,065 - I'm gonna... - Where's the scream pillow? 144 00:05:01,165 --> 00:05:02,367 Yeah, yeah. No, no, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 145 00:05:02,467 --> 00:05:04,201 Guys, wait. We can still pull this thing off. 146 00:05:04,301 --> 00:05:05,302 We can still pull this thing off. 147 00:05:05,336 --> 00:05:06,637 I-I just came up with another plan. 148 00:05:06,671 --> 00:05:08,072 It was actually based on what Dee just did. 149 00:05:08,172 --> 00:05:11,075 She just went to the bathroom. See, everybody's got to take a dump 150 00:05:11,175 --> 00:05:12,977 at least once in every 24-hour period. 151 00:05:13,010 --> 00:05:15,480 This got me thinking, right? So, at some point today, 152 00:05:15,513 --> 00:05:17,882 each and every one of us will have to take a shit, right? 153 00:05:17,982 --> 00:05:20,618 We're gonna have to go find a bathroom, and at that point, 154 00:05:20,651 --> 00:05:23,187 you will go and execute your part of the plan. 155 00:05:23,287 --> 00:05:24,722 - Sounds good. That's good. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 156 00:05:24,822 --> 00:05:25,990 - See what I'm saying? All right. - Yeah, yeah. 157 00:05:26,023 --> 00:05:27,392 So, Charlie, now it is time 158 00:05:27,492 --> 00:05:29,527 - for you to take your shit. - Is there time? 159 00:05:29,627 --> 00:05:31,061 - Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Okay, great. Nice. 160 00:05:31,161 --> 00:05:33,130 And then, Charlie, go poop, and then we'll get started. 161 00:05:33,163 --> 00:05:34,699 What? No, that's not what he's talking about, Mac. 162 00:05:34,799 --> 00:05:36,066 What he means is that it's time for me 163 00:05:36,166 --> 00:05:37,402 to go to the school, break in 164 00:05:37,502 --> 00:05:39,203 using my old janitor's key, right? 165 00:05:39,303 --> 00:05:40,471 Go into the nurse's office, 166 00:05:40,505 --> 00:05:41,906 'cause he's probably still on his lunch break. 167 00:05:42,006 --> 00:05:43,207 Make the call. Call the valet. 168 00:05:43,307 --> 00:05:44,709 Let him know that his kid's "sick" 169 00:05:44,809 --> 00:05:47,177 and needs to be "picked up from school" ASAP. 170 00:05:47,277 --> 00:05:48,546 My man. With that kind of focus, 171 00:05:48,646 --> 00:05:50,180 we're gonna be able to pull this thing off. 172 00:05:50,214 --> 00:05:51,916 - Yes! - Way to go. - Yeah! And then when he's there, 173 00:05:52,016 --> 00:05:53,484 - that's when he poops. - Wrong! 174 00:05:53,518 --> 00:05:55,352 - Totally wrong. Just go, Charlie. Go. - Okay. 175 00:05:55,386 --> 00:05:56,921 A-And keep this kind of good focus in mind 176 00:05:57,021 --> 00:05:58,355 when it comes to what's inside your pants, 177 00:05:58,389 --> 00:05:59,824 'cause I want that, man. 178 00:05:59,857 --> 00:06:01,726 Okay. Yeah. All right, great. 179 00:06:02,960 --> 00:06:03,994 - I want what's in your pants. - No, no. 180 00:06:04,028 --> 00:06:05,062 All right. 181 00:06:05,162 --> 00:06:07,231 Okay. Where's Charlie? 182 00:06:07,331 --> 00:06:08,799 He had to take a shit. 183 00:06:09,284 --> 00:06:10,435 - Yeah. - Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 184 00:06:10,468 --> 00:06:12,470 - And I, too, have to take a shit now, as well. - Oh, what? 185 00:06:12,570 --> 00:06:13,671 No. What, now? No. 186 00:06:13,704 --> 00:06:15,606 Well, make up your mind, or I-I do the horn. 187 00:06:15,640 --> 00:06:17,575 - Okay. It is a bit of an emergency. - No, it isn't. 188 00:06:17,675 --> 00:06:19,410 He... You can, you can hold it. He's gonna hold it. 189 00:06:20,892 --> 00:06:23,814 Knock, knock, knock. Hey! How you doing, old Terry? 190 00:06:23,914 --> 00:06:25,249 Old buddy, old pal! 191 00:06:26,581 --> 00:06:27,785 Do I know you? 192 00:06:27,818 --> 00:06:30,120 Ah, come on, it's me! It's Charlie! Remember? 193 00:06:30,154 --> 00:06:32,457 I used to be the janitor here a few years back. 194 00:06:32,490 --> 00:06:34,659 Yeah, well, I got fired on account of a relationship 195 00:06:34,759 --> 00:06:36,627 I was having with a Juggalo child, you know. 196 00:06:36,661 --> 00:06:38,362 That's not the point. The point is though 197 00:06:38,395 --> 00:06:39,997 I got my old job back. 198 00:06:40,097 --> 00:06:42,332 I'm ready to have new relationships with the children. 199 00:06:42,433 --> 00:06:44,769 And in case you're wondering how I got in the building, 200 00:06:44,802 --> 00:06:46,471 that's how. 201 00:06:47,576 --> 00:06:49,139 Oh. 202 00:06:49,173 --> 00:06:50,475 Right. 203 00:06:50,575 --> 00:06:51,942 And if memory serves, 204 00:06:51,976 --> 00:06:54,011 you usually take your lunch break about now. 205 00:06:54,111 --> 00:06:56,146 So how about you pop on out, eat some lunch, 206 00:06:56,246 --> 00:06:57,648 and I'll clean up your office. 207 00:06:57,748 --> 00:06:59,817 Oh, uh, I ate already. 208 00:06:59,917 --> 00:07:01,085 Did you? 209 00:07:01,185 --> 00:07:02,687 Lunch is at noon. It's 12:30. 210 00:07:02,787 --> 00:07:04,321 Oh, yeah. Look at that there. 211 00:07:04,421 --> 00:07:06,524 You know what happened though, Terry, was I got a little 212 00:07:06,624 --> 00:07:08,493 held up on account of it being Dee Day and all. 213 00:07:08,593 --> 00:07:10,828 - It's not D-Day. - You know what? 214 00:07:10,861 --> 00:07:12,663 Actually, Terry, I should tell you this. 215 00:07:12,697 --> 00:07:15,833 Um, I saw some kids breaking in to your car outside. 216 00:07:15,866 --> 00:07:17,001 I ride a bike. 217 00:07:17,101 --> 00:07:18,335 Yeah. That's what I meant. 218 00:07:18,368 --> 00:07:20,170 They were breaking on in to your bicycle. 219 00:07:20,270 --> 00:07:22,507 Kicked it in half. Filled it with horse manure. 220 00:07:22,540 --> 00:07:25,009 - Kind of a prank, I guess. - Yeah, I don't believe you. 221 00:07:25,042 --> 00:07:27,444 Well, only one way to find out. Better pop outside, take a peek. 222 00:07:30,447 --> 00:07:32,016 My bike is fine. 223 00:07:32,116 --> 00:07:33,551 One step ahead of me, aren't you, Terry? 224 00:07:33,651 --> 00:07:34,985 Okay, you know what happened? 225 00:07:35,085 --> 00:07:36,987 Dee Day just threw everything off, okay? 226 00:07:37,087 --> 00:07:38,823 So I'm just gonna slide on in here. 227 00:07:38,856 --> 00:07:40,357 Maybe I'm gonna make a little phone call. 228 00:07:40,457 --> 00:07:42,660 No big deal. And I'm not gonna make a phone call. 229 00:07:42,760 --> 00:07:44,662 I'll just have some candy, then. 230 00:07:44,762 --> 00:07:48,398 And I'm not gonna have any candy 'cause candy's for the kids. 231 00:07:48,499 --> 00:07:51,001 Terry, this has been an unfortunate, uh... 232 00:07:51,101 --> 00:07:53,370 Hey, can I use your phone and pretend to be you? 233 00:07:53,470 --> 00:07:54,672 No. 234 00:07:54,705 --> 00:07:57,007 Okay. That's strike three on my, uh, count. 235 00:07:57,041 --> 00:07:58,843 Uh, I'm gonna fuck your bike up, Terry. 236 00:08:06,186 --> 00:08:08,318 - What the hell is this? - Charlie, you would not 237 00:08:08,352 --> 00:08:10,454 - believe what we're doing. - Oh, my God. What is that? 238 00:08:10,487 --> 00:08:12,990 Ladies just doing it for themselves. I'm just playing. 239 00:08:13,090 --> 00:08:14,525 - I'm Martina Martinez. - Oh, no. 240 00:08:14,625 --> 00:08:16,661 You don't have to do the accent anymore, Frank. You're offstage. 241 00:08:16,694 --> 00:08:18,996 - Oh, my God. This is so racist, right? - It's insanely racist. 242 00:08:19,029 --> 00:08:21,732 We didn't want to do it, but you know, Dee's humor is so lowbrow. 243 00:08:21,832 --> 00:08:23,000 Oh, my God. What is she...? 244 00:08:23,033 --> 00:08:24,669 Uh, she wants to do a whole retrospective 245 00:08:24,702 --> 00:08:26,036 of her stupid characters. 246 00:08:26,136 --> 00:08:27,371 - Wrote a play about it. - Her characters suck! 247 00:08:27,471 --> 00:08:28,505 - I know! - Her characters suck! 248 00:08:28,606 --> 00:08:29,974 Charlie, thank God you're here. 249 00:08:30,007 --> 00:08:31,375 - Go get into costume. We're up next. - Dennis. 250 00:08:31,475 --> 00:08:32,643 Oh, Dennis, uh, you're offstage, 251 00:08:32,677 --> 00:08:33,844 so y-you don't have to do the accent anymore. 252 00:08:33,878 --> 00:08:35,245 That's why you suck at everything, Maxie. 253 00:08:35,345 --> 00:08:37,047 I say if you're gonna do a racist stereotype, 254 00:08:37,147 --> 00:08:39,349 you best do it right. I mean, that's a bit much, but you know. 255 00:08:39,383 --> 00:08:41,385 - Oh, uh, where are we with the phone call? - Uh, no. 256 00:08:41,485 --> 00:08:43,020 I wasn't able to make it. I was not able to make the call, guys. 257 00:08:43,120 --> 00:08:44,488 - What? - I'm sorry. Okay, look. 258 00:08:44,521 --> 00:08:46,490 Here's what we'll do. I'll-I'll go to the valet myself, okay? 259 00:08:46,523 --> 00:08:48,192 I'll go to the restaurant. I'll get the key. 260 00:08:48,225 --> 00:08:49,894 I-I can make it work, Dennis, all right? Don't get mad. 261 00:08:49,994 --> 00:08:52,730 - Who's desperate now, Charlie? - Shut up, Mac, you racist! 262 00:08:52,763 --> 00:08:54,932 I'm not racist! She's racist! She's the one that's racist! 263 00:08:54,965 --> 00:08:56,300 - She's making us do it. - Hey, turkeys! - Shh. Shh. 264 00:08:56,400 --> 00:08:57,902 - What's the holdup in there? - No, no, no, no. Goddamn it. 265 00:08:58,002 --> 00:08:59,704 Look, uh, you stay here, Charlie. 266 00:08:59,804 --> 00:09:02,539 Um, Mac, Frank, you go down there, okay? 267 00:09:02,640 --> 00:09:04,441 Um, you're not on again till the second act. 268 00:09:04,474 --> 00:09:06,476 - I won't let you down, Dennis. - Great. Go, go, go. 269 00:09:06,577 --> 00:09:07,978 - Go. - Go, go, go, go, go. 270 00:09:08,078 --> 00:09:09,880 - Oh, man. - Charlie. Charlie, go get into your costume. 271 00:09:09,980 --> 00:09:11,716 - We got to learn a song. - What? A song? 272 00:09:15,152 --> 00:09:16,687 God. 273 00:09:16,721 --> 00:09:18,022 The glue on these teeth is insane. 274 00:09:18,055 --> 00:09:20,290 I would never be able to get them off and on in time. 275 00:09:20,324 --> 00:09:22,292 Ah, this makeup is making me sick. 276 00:09:22,326 --> 00:09:25,029 - I'm... I feel awful. - It's not the makeup, Frank. 277 00:09:25,062 --> 00:09:27,665 It's the bag of clams you made us stop before we came here. 278 00:09:27,765 --> 00:09:28,773 The clam is fine. 279 00:09:28,833 --> 00:09:30,200 If w-we got a bag of oysters, 280 00:09:30,234 --> 00:09:32,236 those would've made us really sick. 281 00:09:32,336 --> 00:09:33,604 Whatever, dude. Just focus, all right? 282 00:09:33,638 --> 00:09:35,139 The councilwoman's gonna be here any second. 283 00:09:35,172 --> 00:09:37,141 Yeah, well, what do we got to do now? 284 00:09:37,241 --> 00:09:38,809 Charlie screwed up the whole thing with the valet. 285 00:09:38,909 --> 00:09:40,477 Now how are we gonna get her keys? 286 00:09:40,577 --> 00:09:42,146 - All right, well, I got a plan. - What? 287 00:09:42,179 --> 00:09:44,481 Now, when the valet gets into the next car, 288 00:09:44,514 --> 00:09:45,816 I want you to go to your car, 289 00:09:45,850 --> 00:09:47,517 and I want you to ram him, all right? 290 00:09:47,618 --> 00:09:49,654 Nothing crazy, but it's got to be believable, all right? 291 00:09:49,687 --> 00:09:51,455 Then, I'll step in as the valet. 292 00:09:51,488 --> 00:09:53,123 I'll get the councilwoman's keys. 293 00:09:53,157 --> 00:09:55,860 I'll go get a copy made. I'll be back here ASAP. 294 00:09:55,960 --> 00:09:57,828 I have, I have a suggestion. I mean, if you want... 295 00:09:57,862 --> 00:09:59,630 if you want it to be really believable... 296 00:09:59,664 --> 00:10:02,332 the car accident... then I think you should do it. 297 00:10:02,432 --> 00:10:06,671 I mean, I'm not saying out loud why you should be the one 298 00:10:06,704 --> 00:10:11,008 to have the car accident, but I think it would play much better. 299 00:10:11,108 --> 00:10:12,276 I do appreciate that you're working 300 00:10:12,376 --> 00:10:13,811 on your prejudices, Frank. I, too, am trying 301 00:10:13,844 --> 00:10:15,545 to become a better man and... but I just... 302 00:10:15,646 --> 00:10:16,914 I-I-I really think that, unfortunately, 303 00:10:16,947 --> 00:10:18,683 - it is a better plan. - It's a good plan. 304 00:10:18,783 --> 00:10:20,785 So, uh, I'm just gonna go ahead and do that. 305 00:10:20,818 --> 00:10:22,152 Oh! Oh! 306 00:10:22,252 --> 00:10:23,821 Okay. Okay, he's coming. Oh, good. 307 00:10:23,921 --> 00:10:26,023 - You go get the keys. I'm gonna go do the acc... - Okay. 308 00:10:26,704 --> 00:10:29,026 - Are you okay? - I'm-I'm... I'm just so sick. 309 00:10:29,126 --> 00:10:30,676 This makeup is making me... 310 00:10:32,019 --> 00:10:33,297 Okay. 311 00:10:42,506 --> 00:10:43,974 Hello there. I'm the valet. 312 00:10:44,008 --> 00:10:45,187 I'll take your car. 313 00:10:45,309 --> 00:10:47,477 - Oh, are you okay? - Oh, yeah. 314 00:10:47,511 --> 00:10:50,214 I'm-I'm... I'm fine. I'm aces. It's just... 315 00:10:50,314 --> 00:10:53,017 It's just that I got a little skin thing going on. 316 00:10:53,050 --> 00:10:55,485 But I-I... I may get sick, but it won't be clams. 317 00:10:55,519 --> 00:10:58,322 It won't be the clams, because if it was clams... 318 00:10:58,355 --> 00:11:01,158 clams and I was sick, it would be all over the pavement. 319 00:11:01,455 --> 00:11:02,860 Uh, uh, I'm sorry, but is there someone else 320 00:11:02,960 --> 00:11:04,361 - that can take my car from me? - No. No. 321 00:11:04,461 --> 00:11:06,363 - He's gone. He had a car accident. - An accident? 322 00:11:06,463 --> 00:11:07,965 - Oh, my God. Oh, geez. - Yeah. 323 00:11:07,998 --> 00:11:10,034 - Oh. Oh. - Yeah, there it is. 324 00:11:10,134 --> 00:11:11,668 - That was it. Yeah. - God. Um... 325 00:11:14,471 --> 00:11:16,206 - It's not the clams! - Oh! Uh, yeah. 326 00:11:16,306 --> 00:11:18,375 I'm telling you, it can't be the clams! 327 00:11:18,475 --> 00:11:20,711 It don't make no sense! No, don't go. 328 00:11:23,814 --> 00:11:26,283 It's not the clams! 329 00:11:37,862 --> 00:11:38,929 - "For me," idiot. - Uh... 330 00:11:40,898 --> 00:11:42,266 Ha. 331 00:11:42,299 --> 00:11:44,268 Okay. Then you do the... 332 00:11:45,476 --> 00:11:47,371 - Do we have to? - Yeah, I mean. Yeah. 333 00:11:47,471 --> 00:11:48,705 Well, I don't know. Did you want the horn? 334 00:11:51,976 --> 00:11:53,477 Let's just get it over with. 335 00:11:53,577 --> 00:11:55,545 Plant one on me, Covington! 336 00:11:55,645 --> 00:11:57,614 Goddamn it. Yeah. 337 00:12:00,284 --> 00:12:01,402 Yeah. 338 00:12:01,919 --> 00:12:04,154 Yeah, I-I'm looking here in the script, 339 00:12:04,254 --> 00:12:05,790 and it says that they kiss, 340 00:12:05,823 --> 00:12:08,658 "with the quivering lips of two souls desperate 341 00:12:08,759 --> 00:12:10,928 to taste the juices of passion." 342 00:12:12,662 --> 00:12:14,598 Did that seem like that to you guys? 343 00:12:14,698 --> 00:12:17,367 - No. - No. 344 00:12:17,401 --> 00:12:20,004 No, me, neither. Okay. So do that, then. 345 00:12:20,337 --> 00:12:21,605 Gladly. 346 00:12:40,324 --> 00:12:41,591 Yeah. 347 00:12:41,691 --> 00:12:42,993 Wow! 348 00:12:43,027 --> 00:12:44,594 Okay. 349 00:12:44,694 --> 00:12:47,998 Very nice. Way better than I was expecting. 350 00:12:50,200 --> 00:12:51,601 Goddamn bitch. 351 00:12:53,203 --> 00:12:54,839 - Goddamn bitch. - She's sick is what she is. 352 00:12:54,872 --> 00:12:56,440 - Yeah, she's sick. - That's a sick person right there. 353 00:12:56,540 --> 00:12:58,275 And I know we're supposed to be cool with this, 'cause, like, 354 00:12:58,375 --> 00:12:59,776 that's where society's headed, but I'm just... I'm not there. 355 00:12:59,877 --> 00:13:01,511 - I'm not saying it's not right. - I'm not ready. I'm not ready. 356 00:13:01,611 --> 00:13:02,980 I'm saying I don't want to do it. I don't want to do it. 357 00:13:03,013 --> 00:13:04,481 What did you eat? Why am I getting a weird taste... 358 00:13:04,514 --> 00:13:06,583 I had cheese. I thought... Well, I wanted... 359 00:13:06,616 --> 00:13:08,018 Well, now you know how it feels. 360 00:13:08,118 --> 00:13:09,653 Oh, I don't want to taste your cheese. It's weird... 361 00:13:09,753 --> 00:13:10,888 Well, I didn't want to taste your cheese, either. 362 00:13:12,923 --> 00:13:15,159 - Hey. How'd it go with the valet? - We, uh, we struck out. 363 00:13:15,259 --> 00:13:17,294 - You what? - No good... - Well, how are we gonna get 364 00:13:17,327 --> 00:13:18,362 in the woman's apartment without her key? 365 00:13:18,462 --> 00:13:19,563 We got to get in that apartment. 366 00:13:19,663 --> 00:13:20,998 We got to set that woman's clocks back. 367 00:13:21,031 --> 00:13:22,666 - What's going on with him? - Clams. 368 00:13:22,699 --> 00:13:24,334 - Where'd you get clams? - Did you eat bad clams, Frank? 369 00:13:24,368 --> 00:13:26,503 - No, don't. - Hey, guys. Ticktock back there! 370 00:13:26,536 --> 00:13:27,838 All right, just go finish the goddamn show. 371 00:13:27,872 --> 00:13:29,573 - Yeah, by the way, she made us kiss. - Yeah. 372 00:13:29,673 --> 00:13:31,341 - She made us kiss. - I'm not doing that. I'm not doing that. 373 00:13:31,375 --> 00:13:32,409 All right, let's just get out there. 374 00:13:32,509 --> 00:13:33,844 I don't want to be doing this all week. 375 00:13:33,944 --> 00:13:36,213 - Hey, you guys really did kiss? - Yeah, but don't get excited. 376 00:13:36,313 --> 00:13:37,647 - That's not fair. - But we didn't like it. 377 00:13:37,681 --> 00:13:39,049 - Just go. - Dennis, you should come out with us. 378 00:13:39,149 --> 00:13:40,350 - No, no, no. - Get out! Just go and finish the show. 379 00:13:40,450 --> 00:13:43,053 - Finish the show, all right? - I'm not kissing you. 380 00:13:43,153 --> 00:13:44,211 Okay. 381 00:13:44,521 --> 00:13:47,391 So, in this scene, Martina enters Tammy's massage parlor 382 00:13:47,424 --> 00:13:49,393 looking for a full-body rubdown. 383 00:13:49,493 --> 00:13:51,395 - What? - Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. 384 00:13:51,495 --> 00:13:52,997 And like all great plays, 385 00:13:53,097 --> 00:13:55,532 this one is going to have a happy ending. 386 00:13:57,935 --> 00:13:59,003 Yeah, that was clams. 387 00:14:02,392 --> 00:14:05,475 Oh, nothing like a day of bird-watching. 388 00:14:05,509 --> 00:14:07,677 So peaceful. So relaxing. 389 00:14:07,777 --> 00:14:09,679 - Wouldn't you agree? - Huh? Oh, yeah. - Yeah. 390 00:14:09,779 --> 00:14:11,015 - Really calming. - And, yeah, it's, uh... 391 00:14:11,048 --> 00:14:12,716 - It's great. - Birds are m-majestical. 392 00:14:12,816 --> 00:14:14,151 Ooh, fun bird fact. 393 00:14:14,184 --> 00:14:16,686 The ostrich's eyes are bigger than its brain. 394 00:14:16,720 --> 00:14:19,023 - Huh. - Do you have any thoughts on that? 395 00:14:19,056 --> 00:14:20,690 - That's... cool. - Good. 396 00:14:20,724 --> 00:14:23,227 - Great bird. - It's a good bird. - Ostriches are good birds. 397 00:14:23,327 --> 00:14:25,662 Well, unfortunately, I have to take another piss. 398 00:14:25,695 --> 00:14:27,031 - I'll be back. - Okay. - Okay. 399 00:14:27,064 --> 00:14:28,432 See ya, Dee. We're just gonna look at... 400 00:14:28,532 --> 00:14:29,733 look for some more birds that we love. 401 00:14:29,766 --> 00:14:31,101 - Yeah, we'll keep on, uh... - Yeah, just gonna... 402 00:14:31,135 --> 00:14:34,004 Oh, my God, I want to scream "bird," I want to scream "bird." 403 00:14:34,038 --> 00:14:35,672 - I want to scream, "Bird! Bird!" - That would be so good. 404 00:14:35,705 --> 00:14:37,407 - Do you want me to do it for you, Dennis? - No. 405 00:14:37,507 --> 00:14:39,243 Don't do it. She's probably hiding behind a tree. 406 00:14:39,343 --> 00:14:40,844 Yeah. What's going on with you? 407 00:14:40,877 --> 00:14:42,546 Why are you so off your game today? 408 00:14:42,646 --> 00:14:44,548 Well, I... Charlie has been outshining me all day, 409 00:14:44,648 --> 00:14:46,783 and I want to shine for you, Dennis, so I'm just... 410 00:14:46,816 --> 00:14:48,452 I haven't been outshining you. I was just throwing you looks 411 00:14:48,485 --> 00:14:51,055 because I wanted the candy, but I was gonna share it with you. 412 00:14:51,155 --> 00:14:53,690 - What candy? - Dennis has candy in his pocket. 413 00:14:53,723 --> 00:14:55,307 Okay, guys, can we get back to talking about the plan? 414 00:14:55,326 --> 00:14:57,127 - You have candy? - Look, w-we're getting off track here. 415 00:14:57,161 --> 00:14:58,562 - Dennis has candy? - I heard it crinkle. 416 00:14:58,662 --> 00:14:59,930 - Yeah, I want that candy, man. - Yes, I have candy. 417 00:15:00,030 --> 00:15:01,631 All right? Of course I have candy. 418 00:15:01,665 --> 00:15:03,167 I keep candy in my pocket sometimes 419 00:15:03,267 --> 00:15:04,701 so that I can get Charlie's focus. 420 00:15:04,734 --> 00:15:05,902 It was working like a charm, man. 421 00:15:06,003 --> 00:15:07,837 I was zoned in on everything you were saying. 422 00:15:07,938 --> 00:15:09,940 Yes, I know it was working; the whole goddamn thing was working 423 00:15:10,040 --> 00:15:12,242 till Dee came through with this Dee Day bullshit. 424 00:15:12,276 --> 00:15:14,344 Are we gonna get the candy, or are you gonna keep it 425 00:15:14,444 --> 00:15:16,446 - in your pocket all day? - I'll have some candy. - Here's the candy. 426 00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:18,148 - Yeah! Yes, I knew it. - Oh, oh, oh! I want... 427 00:15:18,248 --> 00:15:19,149 All right, all right. 428 00:15:19,249 --> 00:15:21,318 - Wow. - Children. Children. 429 00:15:21,351 --> 00:15:23,653 - Good candy, good candy. - This is good candy. 430 00:15:23,753 --> 00:15:24,821 I don't need the candy anymore anyway, 431 00:15:24,921 --> 00:15:25,990 'cause I have a backup plan. 432 00:15:26,090 --> 00:15:27,691 We don't need the councilwoman's keys anymore 433 00:15:27,791 --> 00:15:29,793 to get into her house, because we have me. All right? 434 00:15:29,826 --> 00:15:31,461 So I'll peel off. I'll go seduce her. 435 00:15:31,495 --> 00:15:33,163 She'll invite me into her house, 436 00:15:33,197 --> 00:15:35,665 where I'll bang her as fast as I possibly can, and then, 437 00:15:35,699 --> 00:15:37,934 while she's cleaning up afterwards, I'll set all of her clocks back, 438 00:15:38,035 --> 00:15:40,204 causing her to sleep late and miss the boat, okay? 439 00:15:40,304 --> 00:15:41,671 So when Dee comes back, just tell her 440 00:15:41,705 --> 00:15:44,008 - I had to go take my shit. - Nice, man. All right. 441 00:15:44,108 --> 00:15:45,509 - Watch out! - Hey. 442 00:15:45,542 --> 00:15:47,811 - Hey. - Where you rushing off to? 443 00:15:47,844 --> 00:15:49,846 - Oh, I-I got to take a shit. - Do ya? 444 00:15:49,946 --> 00:15:51,515 - Yeah. - Okay. I'll let you do that. 445 00:15:51,548 --> 00:15:53,150 - Okay. - But real quick first. 446 00:15:53,183 --> 00:15:54,784 I wanted to do something with you. 447 00:15:54,818 --> 00:15:57,621 - I really have to shit, Dee. - Yeah, this'll be fast. 448 00:15:57,654 --> 00:15:59,523 - What is that? - Oh, these are makeup wipes. 449 00:15:59,623 --> 00:16:01,358 So that you can remove your makeup. 450 00:16:02,247 --> 00:16:03,360 Makeup? 451 00:16:03,460 --> 00:16:04,995 I'm not wearing any makeup. 452 00:16:05,095 --> 00:16:06,663 Then it won't be an issue. 453 00:16:08,198 --> 00:16:10,134 I mean, I'm wearing a little bit of concealer. 454 00:16:10,167 --> 00:16:11,868 Is that what you're talking about having me remove? 455 00:16:11,968 --> 00:16:13,203 Well, I'm talking about the concealer, yes. 456 00:16:13,303 --> 00:16:14,804 But I'm talking about the rest of the makeup, 457 00:16:14,838 --> 00:16:16,640 the tape you have behind your jaw and your eyes. 458 00:16:16,673 --> 00:16:17,707 I'm talking about the hair paint. 459 00:16:17,807 --> 00:16:19,009 I'm talking about all of it. 460 00:16:24,673 --> 00:16:26,550 What a nice restaurant this is, 461 00:16:26,650 --> 00:16:29,186 filled with attractive, professional-looking people. 462 00:16:29,286 --> 00:16:31,488 You know what it is? It's the kind of place 463 00:16:31,521 --> 00:16:34,824 where you wouldn't want to stick out like a sore thumb. 464 00:16:34,858 --> 00:16:36,526 How are you liking it, Dennis? 465 00:16:38,062 --> 00:16:39,329 Yes, very nice. 466 00:16:39,429 --> 00:16:40,830 - Yeah? - Yes. 467 00:16:40,930 --> 00:16:43,533 Would you like to go introduce yourself to some ladies? 468 00:16:43,633 --> 00:16:46,203 No, uh, I-I'm okay. Uh, no. 469 00:16:46,303 --> 00:16:48,405 Okay. I'll go round some up and bring them to you. 470 00:16:48,505 --> 00:16:49,639 - No. - Yep. 471 00:16:49,673 --> 00:16:51,541 Hey, don't mind her, dude. 472 00:16:51,641 --> 00:16:52,676 Y-You look great. 473 00:16:52,776 --> 00:16:55,712 Holy shit. That's her. 474 00:16:55,812 --> 00:16:57,547 - Who? - The councilwoman. 475 00:16:57,647 --> 00:16:58,882 - She's right there. - Who? Right there? 476 00:16:58,982 --> 00:17:00,550 - Right there. That's her. - Right there? Oh, shit. 477 00:17:00,650 --> 00:17:02,852 - Oh, my God, this is incredible. What are the odds? - That's her, yeah. 478 00:17:02,886 --> 00:17:04,521 Dee has no idea how good this is for us. 479 00:17:04,621 --> 00:17:06,523 - Dennis, go do your thing. - This is great. 480 00:17:06,623 --> 00:17:08,525 No, I-I... 481 00:17:08,625 --> 00:17:10,194 - I can't. No. - Buddy, 482 00:17:10,227 --> 00:17:11,995 makeup or not, you are the Golden God. 483 00:17:12,028 --> 00:17:13,563 It's all about what's in here. 484 00:17:13,663 --> 00:17:15,932 Oh. Is your pec deflated? 485 00:17:16,032 --> 00:17:17,534 Sh-She took his pads out. 486 00:17:17,567 --> 00:17:19,103 - Yeah, he had... - Oh, your pec pads. 487 00:17:19,136 --> 00:17:21,305 - He had some pads. - No. 488 00:17:21,405 --> 00:17:24,108 Well, either way, man, you can do it. You're our only hope. 489 00:17:24,141 --> 00:17:25,342 - I can do this. - Yes. - Yeah. 490 00:17:25,375 --> 00:17:26,943 - Yeah, it's worth a shot. - Yeah! 491 00:17:26,976 --> 00:17:28,445 - That's the attitude. - Come on, man. - You're looking good. 492 00:17:28,478 --> 00:17:30,247 You got it. You got this. You got this. 493 00:17:30,347 --> 00:17:32,216 - You got this. You got this. - Go, go, go, go, go. 494 00:17:32,316 --> 00:17:34,584 - He ain't got this. - That's what his soul looks like. 495 00:17:45,595 --> 00:17:46,963 Hi. 496 00:17:46,996 --> 00:17:48,998 Did I frighten you? 497 00:17:49,099 --> 00:17:50,667 Sorry. 498 00:17:50,767 --> 00:17:53,737 Uh, I'm not, I'm not, uh... I'm Dennis. 499 00:17:56,005 --> 00:17:58,742 Do you like hard candy? 500 00:17:58,842 --> 00:18:01,378 I have candies. Oh, you know what? 501 00:18:01,411 --> 00:18:03,913 Actually, I don't. Scratch that. I... 502 00:18:04,013 --> 00:18:07,317 I threw all the hard candies at those idiot children. 503 00:18:07,417 --> 00:18:09,186 Uh... 504 00:18:09,286 --> 00:18:11,020 Oysters or clams? 505 00:18:11,121 --> 00:18:13,823 - Excuse me? - Oysters, obviously. 506 00:18:15,761 --> 00:18:16,426 You know? 507 00:18:16,526 --> 00:18:18,662 - Mm. - Plus, like, they-they... 508 00:18:18,762 --> 00:18:20,264 You can, you can get sick off clams. 509 00:18:20,364 --> 00:18:22,266 Like, I got real sick off clams when I was, like... 510 00:18:23,500 --> 00:18:25,001 Anything can make you throw up 511 00:18:25,034 --> 00:18:27,537 if you're, if you're, uh... if it's gone bad. 512 00:18:27,637 --> 00:18:29,506 You know, my dad was, like, throwing up off... 513 00:18:29,606 --> 00:18:31,341 He's not really my dad, but you know. 514 00:18:31,375 --> 00:18:33,343 Yeah. 515 00:18:33,377 --> 00:18:35,443 But anyway, it's oysters for me. 516 00:18:36,043 --> 00:18:37,103 Um... 517 00:18:37,113 --> 00:18:38,515 Hey, uh, you know what? I just realized. 518 00:18:38,615 --> 00:18:40,217 We don't have a lot of time, so let's... 519 00:18:40,317 --> 00:18:42,452 We should get this over with. Can I get your house key? 520 00:18:42,552 --> 00:18:43,653 - What? - We don't, 521 00:18:43,687 --> 00:18:45,455 uh, have to have sex like this. 522 00:18:45,489 --> 00:18:48,024 I can, I can... I can put another man's face on. 523 00:18:48,124 --> 00:18:50,360 If you give me your house key, I can go to your house 524 00:18:50,460 --> 00:18:51,661 and put on some of your makeup... 525 00:18:51,761 --> 00:18:53,497 - Get away from me. - Well, hold on a second. 526 00:18:53,530 --> 00:18:56,400 Um, uh, we... I'm supposed to be taking a shit right now. 527 00:18:56,500 --> 00:18:58,202 - And so... Yeah. - Dennis. 528 00:18:58,302 --> 00:18:59,836 What are you doing to this woman? 529 00:18:59,936 --> 00:19:01,505 Uh, it was my turn to take a shit, 530 00:19:01,605 --> 00:19:04,007 and then I was gonna do it with her. 531 00:19:04,107 --> 00:19:05,709 I am so sorry about him. Okay? 532 00:19:05,809 --> 00:19:07,177 This man is clearly a monster, 533 00:19:07,211 --> 00:19:08,645 and he will be punished accordingly. 534 00:19:08,678 --> 00:19:10,146 G-Go wait for me over there, monster. 535 00:19:10,180 --> 00:19:11,315 We'll find another woman. 536 00:19:12,582 --> 00:19:13,817 It's Dee Day. 537 00:19:17,329 --> 00:19:18,388 Just so you know, you look... 538 00:19:18,488 --> 00:19:21,191 a lot better now, but you looked fine. 539 00:19:21,225 --> 00:19:23,493 I just don't look good when I haven't got enough sleep. 540 00:19:23,527 --> 00:19:25,729 And I got a little nap in, so, you know, I'm back. 541 00:19:25,762 --> 00:19:27,297 - Huh. - Anyway, 542 00:19:27,331 --> 00:19:29,399 I bet you the city council's voted already. 543 00:19:29,499 --> 00:19:31,468 - Dying to figure out which way they voted. - Oh, dude. 544 00:19:31,501 --> 00:19:33,470 It doesn't matter. Like, the bird bitch ruined everything. 545 00:19:33,503 --> 00:19:35,805 - We had a plan. We had... - Shh. Keep your voice down. 546 00:19:35,839 --> 00:19:37,907 We may have lost this one, but the most important thing 547 00:19:38,007 --> 00:19:39,809 is that we don't get another Dee Day. 548 00:19:39,843 --> 00:19:42,712 Oh, man. That's, like, the 20th piss I took today. 549 00:19:42,812 --> 00:19:44,180 - Oh, yeah? - Well, hey, it's important 550 00:19:44,214 --> 00:19:45,749 - to stay hydrated. - Yeah. 551 00:19:45,849 --> 00:19:47,851 Knock it off. Looks like you guys are gonna make it. 552 00:19:47,884 --> 00:19:50,720 And I have to say, I am very impressed that you were able 553 00:19:50,820 --> 00:19:53,823 to focus on anything other than yourselves for one entire day. 554 00:19:53,857 --> 00:19:55,825 - Well, Dee, it's been a real pleasure. - Uh, we haven't 555 00:19:55,859 --> 00:19:57,894 - made it yet, so... - We've enjoyed it. - It's been really great. 556 00:19:57,994 --> 00:20:00,364 And Dee Day ends officially in 557 00:20:00,397 --> 00:20:03,199 three, two, one. 558 00:20:04,834 --> 00:20:06,370 All right, let me have it. Pile it on me. 559 00:20:06,403 --> 00:20:08,338 - News. - Pile it on me. - TV. TV. Yeah, put the... 560 00:20:08,372 --> 00:20:10,006 - Channel 7. Channel 7. - Put the news on. Put the news on. 561 00:20:10,039 --> 00:20:11,341 - What are you doing? - What channel? What channel? 562 00:20:11,375 --> 00:20:12,742 - S-Seven? Seven? - Yeah, it might be. 563 00:20:13,313 --> 00:20:14,744 In a stunning upset, 564 00:20:14,844 --> 00:20:17,781 local ordinance LC-103 passed today. 565 00:20:17,814 --> 00:20:19,449 The controversial proposal 566 00:20:19,483 --> 00:20:22,852 actually legalizes public urination. 567 00:20:22,886 --> 00:20:24,588 - It passed! It passed! - It passed! It passed! 568 00:20:24,688 --> 00:20:25,689 It passed! 569 00:20:26,345 --> 00:20:27,357 Oh! 570 00:20:27,391 --> 00:20:28,758 - It passed anyway. - Nice! 571 00:20:28,858 --> 00:20:29,959 What passed? 572 00:20:29,993 --> 00:20:31,695 Dee, we have been working for weeks 573 00:20:31,728 --> 00:20:33,029 on a very intricate plan 574 00:20:33,062 --> 00:20:34,431 to ensure the passage of that ordinance. 575 00:20:34,531 --> 00:20:36,300 Yeah. All we had to do was stop one city councilwoman 576 00:20:36,333 --> 00:20:37,901 - from voting, that was it. - Yeah, yeah. So we had 577 00:20:38,001 --> 00:20:39,736 this ingenious plan to, uh, get ahold of her keys, 578 00:20:39,836 --> 00:20:41,505 sneak into her house and, uh, turn all of her clocks back, 579 00:20:41,605 --> 00:20:43,573 - mess with her phones a little bit or whatever... - It was a good plan. 580 00:20:43,673 --> 00:20:45,642 so that she would sleep too late, she would miss the vote, 581 00:20:45,675 --> 00:20:47,653 and the ordinance would pass, and it passed! 582 00:20:48,845 --> 00:20:50,280 We knew that she would be the one dissenting vote. 583 00:20:50,314 --> 00:20:51,415 - So we had to stop her. - Yeah. 584 00:20:51,515 --> 00:20:52,849 - How? - Oh, well, it's a group... 585 00:20:52,949 --> 00:20:54,484 - Uh, well, yeah. - There it is. 586 00:20:54,518 --> 00:20:56,119 It's all men and she was the one lady. 587 00:20:56,152 --> 00:20:57,687 - Men are free once again... - We are free! 588 00:20:57,787 --> 00:20:59,989 to relieve themselves where God intended. 589 00:21:00,023 --> 00:21:01,291 You guys are idiots! 590 00:21:01,325 --> 00:21:03,159 That's the most ludicrous thing I've ever even heard. 591 00:21:03,259 --> 00:21:05,161 Why didn't you just go and slash her tires, like, 592 00:21:05,194 --> 00:21:06,996 five minutes before she had to leave for the meeting? 593 00:21:07,096 --> 00:21:08,765 - Oh. Oh. - What? Oh, yeah, just do that. 594 00:21:08,865 --> 00:21:10,334 - Okay, yeah, just do that. - Yeah, sure. 595 00:21:10,434 --> 00:21:12,135 Dee, you know what? You don't get it. Okay? 596 00:21:12,168 --> 00:21:14,338 Women will never understand what it's like to be a man. 597 00:21:14,438 --> 00:21:17,040 Like, we just, like, we need to piss in public, okay? 598 00:21:17,140 --> 00:21:20,377 We need to hatch plans that actually work. 599 00:21:20,477 --> 00:21:22,679 Dee, your plan would not have worked. 600 00:21:22,712 --> 00:21:25,482 Oh, yeah? My plan did work, jackass. 601 00:21:25,515 --> 00:21:27,717 I got close enough to the councilwoman in the restaurant 602 00:21:27,817 --> 00:21:29,719 to steal her wallet, got her address, 603 00:21:29,819 --> 00:21:31,521 and then replaced the wallet without her seeing. 604 00:21:31,555 --> 00:21:33,122 And then, in the middle of the night 605 00:21:33,156 --> 00:21:35,291 when I told you guys I was going to "take a shit" 606 00:21:35,325 --> 00:21:37,293 like you were doing all goddamn day, 607 00:21:37,327 --> 00:21:39,663 I snuck over and I slashed her tires. 608 00:21:40,601 --> 00:21:42,298 You did? Why? 609 00:21:42,332 --> 00:21:44,167 Did you see how many times I peed today? 610 00:21:44,267 --> 00:21:45,569 I have a teeny, tiny, little bladder. 611 00:21:45,669 --> 00:21:47,804 I want to be able to pee on the street if I have to. 612 00:21:47,837 --> 00:21:49,706 - Oh! You? - Ugh! Gross. - In front of us? 613 00:21:49,806 --> 00:21:51,341 - Just out there in the public? - A woman? - Squat? 614 00:21:51,441 --> 00:21:52,676 - Dee, you nasty. - Nasty. 615 00:21:52,776 --> 00:21:55,044 - Dee, you n... - She's so nasty. 616 00:21:55,144 --> 00:21:57,180 No, you know what? You guys are just pissed 617 00:21:57,280 --> 00:21:59,383 - because I outsmarted you. - Oh, you outsmarted us? 618 00:21:59,483 --> 00:22:01,718 - You're embarrassed. - Dee, you spent the entirety of Dee Day 619 00:22:01,818 --> 00:22:03,587 coming up with a plan that eventually led 620 00:22:03,687 --> 00:22:06,022 to us getting exactly what we want, so... 621 00:22:06,122 --> 00:22:07,657 - We scored. - You're a stupid bird. 622 00:22:07,691 --> 00:22:09,359 Don't even bother trying to explain it to her. 623 00:22:09,459 --> 00:22:10,994 Her tiny bird brain will never get it. 624 00:22:11,027 --> 00:22:12,429 Birds don't understand plans. 625 00:22:12,529 --> 00:22:13,530 What about this one? Dee's a bird. 626 00:22:14,133 --> 00:22:15,832 - That's a good one. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 627 00:22:15,932 --> 00:22:17,333 Ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh. 628 00:22:17,367 --> 00:22:19,403 You should all probably check your phones. 629 00:22:19,503 --> 00:22:21,137 - Why? - Oh, I don't know. 630 00:22:21,170 --> 00:22:24,040 Just 'cause I pushed the cuckoo clock ahead an hour. 631 00:22:25,141 --> 00:22:27,243 No. Shut up. 632 00:22:27,343 --> 00:22:29,212 Here's the problem, guys. 633 00:22:29,312 --> 00:22:33,182 You just insulted me on Dee Day. 634 00:22:33,282 --> 00:22:35,184 - No. - No, no, no, no. God. - Oh, no, wait... 635 00:22:35,284 --> 00:22:36,853 You know what that earns you? 636 00:22:36,953 --> 00:22:38,321 Another day of Dee. 637 00:22:38,354 --> 00:22:39,856 - Oh, no! - No, no, no, no, no! 638 00:23:21,165 --> 00:23:23,065 - synced and corrected by sot26 - www.addic7ed.com