1 00:00:13,143 --> 00:00:15,363 I'm-a order some chili cheese fries. 2 00:00:15,363 --> 00:00:18,105 - Oh, yeah? Get me some. - Anybody else want an order? 3 00:00:18,105 --> 00:00:20,020 A delivery of chili cheese fries? 4 00:00:20,020 --> 00:00:22,805 They'll be mush by the time they get here. No way. 5 00:00:22,805 --> 00:00:25,373 Aah! Shit. 6 00:00:25,373 --> 00:00:28,158 What are you doing, man? You can't hit it that hard. 7 00:00:28,158 --> 00:00:30,160 You got to use more finesse. 8 00:00:30,160 --> 00:00:31,466 Well, finesse isn't really my style, Charlie. 9 00:00:31,466 --> 00:00:34,077 I like to dominate the table into submission. 10 00:00:34,077 --> 00:00:36,384 Dennis, I got to head out. Tip me out. 11 00:00:36,384 --> 00:00:38,429 - What? - Give me my tips. 12 00:00:38,429 --> 00:00:39,735 What tips, Dee? What are you talking about? 13 00:00:39,735 --> 00:00:41,650 Hey, any of you guys tip Dee today? 14 00:00:41,650 --> 00:00:43,217 - For what? - Hell no. 15 00:00:43,217 --> 00:00:44,870 - No. - All right, whatever. 16 00:00:44,870 --> 00:00:46,568 Just give me 40 bucks from the register. 17 00:00:46,568 --> 00:00:48,135 What do you need money for? 18 00:00:48,135 --> 00:00:49,571 I'm going out. I just need a little cash. 19 00:00:49,571 --> 00:00:51,834 Where you going? 20 00:00:51,834 --> 00:00:55,359 I'm going to a fancy place with some fancy new friends of mine. 21 00:00:55,359 --> 00:00:57,274 - What friends? - What is happening? 22 00:00:57,274 --> 00:00:58,884 Why is everyone asking me questions? 23 00:00:58,884 --> 00:01:00,147 Well, it's 'cause you're sneaking around trying 24 00:01:00,147 --> 00:01:01,452 to steal money that you haven't earned 25 00:01:01,452 --> 00:01:03,237 and looking like Carmen Sandiego. 26 00:01:03,237 --> 00:01:05,195 I mean, what-what are we supposed to think? 27 00:01:05,195 --> 00:01:07,241 - W-What are you hiding, Dee? - What? 28 00:01:07,241 --> 00:01:08,372 - Let me see what's under that coat. - No. 29 00:01:08,372 --> 00:01:09,547 - I want to see what's under it. - No. 30 00:01:09,547 --> 00:01:11,462 - Show me. - She's hiding something, Dennis. 31 00:01:11,462 --> 00:01:13,342 You want me to hold her down and rip it off her? 32 00:01:14,726 --> 00:01:17,207 - Yeah. - Go, Mac. Go, go, go. - Stop it. 33 00:01:17,207 --> 00:01:18,208 - Okay, okay... - Stop. Stop it. Don't touch me. 34 00:01:18,208 --> 00:01:20,689 Don't touch me. Okay? 35 00:01:20,689 --> 00:01:24,693 I decided that I want to take off the coat, 36 00:01:24,693 --> 00:01:27,783 'cause it's hot in here. 37 00:01:29,828 --> 00:01:32,179 Bowling? That's the fancy outing you were, uh, hiding from us? 38 00:01:32,179 --> 00:01:34,398 Dee, why were you hiding that from us? 39 00:01:34,398 --> 00:01:36,183 Because it's my thing, okay? It's not your thing, 40 00:01:36,183 --> 00:01:37,880 and I don't want you guys getting involved. 41 00:01:37,880 --> 00:01:39,925 As if. 42 00:01:39,925 --> 00:01:41,927 - As if, Dee. - As if. 43 00:01:41,927 --> 00:01:44,191 - As if. - As if, Dee. As if. 44 00:01:44,191 --> 00:01:45,757 Yeah, okay. All right. 45 00:01:45,757 --> 00:01:48,238 Well, I'm gonna head out. You guys enjoy sitting around 46 00:01:48,238 --> 00:01:50,675 with your ding-dongs in your hand doing nothing all night. 47 00:01:50,675 --> 00:01:53,243 Ugh. 48 00:01:53,243 --> 00:01:55,202 Ding-dongs in our hand... What is she talking... 49 00:01:55,202 --> 00:01:56,899 - What a bitch. God. - Yeah. 50 00:01:56,899 --> 00:01:58,944 My ding-dong wasn't even in my hand. I mean, what do you... 51 00:01:58,944 --> 00:02:00,337 - Mine was. - Yeah, so was mine. 52 00:02:00,337 --> 00:02:02,209 Yeah, I was scratching mine when she said that. 53 00:02:02,209 --> 00:02:03,645 I-I had my hands fully down my pants, 54 00:02:03,645 --> 00:02:04,907 if I'm being honest. 55 00:02:04,907 --> 00:02:06,474 I had to push it to the left. 56 00:02:06,474 --> 00:02:08,084 - They get itchy in there. - That's a, such a coincidence. 57 00:02:08,084 --> 00:02:09,520 - That is a lucky guess. - That's a crazy... yeah. 58 00:02:09,520 --> 00:02:11,522 - It was a lucky guess. - It was a lucky guess. 59 00:02:11,522 --> 00:02:13,829 But that's not the point. Look-look, the point is... 60 00:02:13,829 --> 00:02:15,874 we have a lot better things to do 61 00:02:15,874 --> 00:02:17,441 than just go bowling. 62 00:02:40,247 --> 00:02:42,379 Oh, hello, ladies. You ready to roll? 63 00:02:42,379 --> 00:02:44,294 Why is everybody sitting on their butts? 64 00:02:44,294 --> 00:02:46,296 We've been waiting here for 20 minutes. 65 00:02:46,296 --> 00:02:48,342 Okay, well, listen, things are just gonna be 66 00:02:48,342 --> 00:02:50,344 a little different if you want me on your team. 67 00:02:50,344 --> 00:02:51,475 I show up when I want. 68 00:02:51,475 --> 00:02:52,737 Well, we don't want you on our team. 69 00:02:52,737 --> 00:02:53,782 It's just that our fourth didn't show up 70 00:02:53,782 --> 00:02:55,087 and literally no one else 71 00:02:55,087 --> 00:02:56,306 was free on a Friday night. 72 00:02:56,306 --> 00:02:57,655 - So you want me to be here. - Not really. 73 00:02:57,655 --> 00:02:59,135 Awesome. Good. 74 00:02:59,135 --> 00:03:00,441 Do you have the $35 team fee? 75 00:03:00,441 --> 00:03:03,139 - Ooh, I do not, but I have... - Okay. 76 00:03:03,139 --> 00:03:04,923 something much more valuable: 77 00:03:04,923 --> 00:03:06,360 my expertise. 78 00:03:06,360 --> 00:03:07,926 So listen to me and you'll be in business. 79 00:03:07,926 --> 00:03:10,102 Anyone want to snort Jell-O shots? 80 00:03:10,102 --> 00:03:11,147 - Oh... - Snail? 81 00:03:11,147 --> 00:03:12,366 You're on the team? 82 00:03:12,366 --> 00:03:13,541 Yeah, I love bowling. 83 00:03:13,541 --> 00:03:16,370 The whole scene is so hot. 84 00:03:16,370 --> 00:03:17,719 I sucked off a rando in the parking lot. 85 00:03:17,719 --> 00:03:19,460 Ugh, my mouth hurts. 86 00:03:19,460 --> 00:03:22,419 Gross. Waitress, you're responsible for this? 87 00:03:22,419 --> 00:03:24,378 I'm not responsible for this, but this is my team, okay? 88 00:03:24,378 --> 00:03:26,467 So you can't just come in here and take over, 89 00:03:26,467 --> 00:03:28,469 come in late, not have your money, okay? 90 00:03:28,469 --> 00:03:32,342 I signed us up, I booked the lane, I made us shirts. 91 00:03:32,342 --> 00:03:35,127 I even found us an appliance company to sponsor us. 92 00:03:35,127 --> 00:03:38,305 - Frige-it. - "Frige-it Bitches"? 93 00:03:38,305 --> 00:03:39,915 - Yeah. - God, you guys are stupid. 94 00:03:39,915 --> 00:03:41,612 - I'm not wearing this. - No, it's so funny. 95 00:03:41,612 --> 00:03:43,701 - It's not funny. - We've been laughing all night. 96 00:03:43,701 --> 00:03:45,181 - That doesn't surprise me. Now listen up. - Okay... 97 00:03:45,181 --> 00:03:47,357 - We're not here to laugh or be funny. - No, thank you. 98 00:03:47,357 --> 00:03:48,619 - We're here to win. - Oh, God. 99 00:03:48,619 --> 00:03:50,317 Which you can do if you listen to me. 100 00:03:50,317 --> 00:03:53,320 Or perhaps I should let my balls do the talking. 101 00:03:53,320 --> 00:03:55,278 - Please do. - Yeah. 102 00:04:04,461 --> 00:04:06,507 Hot shit, Dee. 103 00:04:06,507 --> 00:04:08,030 - Do I have your attention? - Well, well, well. 104 00:04:08,030 --> 00:04:10,424 - Oh, God. - What? 105 00:04:10,424 --> 00:04:11,729 Pretty nice roll, Deandra. 106 00:04:11,729 --> 00:04:13,731 Too bad it'll be your last. 107 00:04:13,731 --> 00:04:15,777 Can you please just leave and let me have one thing to myself? 108 00:04:15,777 --> 00:04:17,431 Nah. 109 00:04:17,431 --> 00:04:19,389 So these, uh, "frigid bitches," 110 00:04:19,389 --> 00:04:21,086 these are your new "fancy friends"? 111 00:04:21,086 --> 00:04:23,045 What is this, some kind of women's league? 112 00:04:23,045 --> 00:04:24,568 It's a coed tournament. 113 00:04:24,568 --> 00:04:27,441 So you'll be competing against men? 114 00:04:27,441 --> 00:04:30,008 Vaginas and penises together again. 115 00:04:30,008 --> 00:04:31,488 I'll tell you what, why don't we join this league 116 00:04:31,488 --> 00:04:33,273 and have ourselves a little competition? 117 00:04:34,535 --> 00:04:37,189 Or are you too scared that you'll lose to us? 118 00:04:41,019 --> 00:04:43,413 He did one, so I thought we were doing... Okay. 119 00:04:43,413 --> 00:04:44,458 Shit. 120 00:04:44,458 --> 00:04:46,024 Anyone got a straw? 121 00:04:46,024 --> 00:04:47,417 - I didn't know. - Okay. - It's fine. All right. 122 00:04:47,417 --> 00:04:48,817 - Hey! - Hey, guys? - Let's have it. 123 00:04:49,550 --> 00:04:50,638 - Oh, for Christ's sakes. - Shit. 124 00:04:50,638 --> 00:04:52,379 - Are you kidding me? - Please tell me 125 00:04:52,379 --> 00:04:54,206 you guys don't own this bowling alley. 126 00:04:54,206 --> 00:04:55,556 We got out of the video rental business 127 00:04:55,556 --> 00:04:57,384 just after the bubble burst. 128 00:04:57,384 --> 00:04:59,211 Bowling's always been in our blood. 129 00:04:59,211 --> 00:05:00,430 Ryan's got the forearms 130 00:05:00,430 --> 00:05:01,431 of an elephant wrangler. 131 00:05:01,431 --> 00:05:03,085 He could have been pro. 132 00:05:03,085 --> 00:05:04,478 I could have been. 133 00:05:04,478 --> 00:05:06,393 If not for my tragic accident. 134 00:05:06,393 --> 00:05:09,091 The story is too horrible for words, so don't ask me... 135 00:05:09,091 --> 00:05:10,527 - We-we... - We're not gonna ask. We don't really care 136 00:05:10,527 --> 00:05:12,094 - about that, yeah. - You can keep that to yourself. 137 00:05:12,094 --> 00:05:14,879 I'd tell you, but you wouldn't be able to handle it. 138 00:05:14,879 --> 00:05:17,404 - You clearly want to tell us, but we're not here for it. - We don't want to hear it. 139 00:05:17,404 --> 00:05:19,406 Listen, I'm moving past this. Can we sign up for the league? 140 00:05:19,406 --> 00:05:21,843 - Impossible. - Why, is it too late to sign up? 141 00:05:21,843 --> 00:05:24,585 No, you just couldn't afford it. 142 00:05:24,585 --> 00:05:26,500 - How much is it? - $35. 143 00:05:26,500 --> 00:05:28,458 - We got that. - Well, we got that, yeah. That's fine. 144 00:05:28,458 --> 00:05:30,417 Each. 145 00:05:30,417 --> 00:05:33,289 - Uh, do you mind covering us? - That's still... 146 00:05:33,289 --> 00:05:34,856 W-We're good, we're good, yeah. 147 00:05:34,856 --> 00:05:36,466 Hey, listen, can we play the Frigid Bitches first? 148 00:05:36,466 --> 00:05:38,033 Sure, whatever. I don't give a shit. 149 00:05:38,033 --> 00:05:39,730 You guys got chili cheese fries here? 150 00:05:39,730 --> 00:05:41,166 Franklin, we do have chili 151 00:05:41,166 --> 00:05:42,472 and we do have cheese and we do have fries, 152 00:05:42,472 --> 00:05:44,822 but combining them is strictly prohibited. 153 00:05:44,822 --> 00:05:47,347 - Why? - The story is too terrible to tell. 154 00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:48,913 - Oh, for Christ's sake. Nobody cares. - Oh, Christ's sake. 155 00:05:48,913 --> 00:05:50,524 - Sign us up for the league. - We won't combine the fries. 156 00:05:50,524 --> 00:05:52,569 Make sure we're playing the Frigid Bitches. 157 00:05:52,569 --> 00:05:54,571 Yeah, give us some shoes. W-What size shoe... 158 00:05:54,571 --> 00:05:56,443 - All right, how you doing? - We'll get the shoes. 159 00:05:56,443 --> 00:05:59,402 Three, two, one and smile. 160 00:05:59,402 --> 00:06:01,143 Great. 161 00:06:01,143 --> 00:06:02,623 - Okay. - Let me check that picture. 162 00:06:02,623 --> 00:06:03,928 - How's my ass look? - Okay. 163 00:06:03,928 --> 00:06:05,626 That looks pretty good. 164 00:06:05,626 --> 00:06:07,454 Oh, it looks huge. Sick. 165 00:06:07,454 --> 00:06:09,847 Can we take another? I wasn't sufficiently in character. 166 00:06:09,847 --> 00:06:11,719 - In character? - Yes, character. 167 00:06:11,719 --> 00:06:13,460 I'm researching a character I'm playing 168 00:06:13,460 --> 00:06:16,419 named Donna Brunswick of the Brunswick Bowling Dynasty. 169 00:06:16,419 --> 00:06:18,682 Oh, goddamn. You guys are not taking this seriously. 170 00:06:18,682 --> 00:06:20,162 Okay? Let's cut the BS. 171 00:06:20,162 --> 00:06:21,772 As your leader, I demand we cut the BS. 172 00:06:21,772 --> 00:06:23,078 Now let's talk order. 173 00:06:23,078 --> 00:06:25,472 I'm thinking Snail, Artemis, 174 00:06:25,472 --> 00:06:27,561 - Waitress, best for last. - Okay, I'm just gonna remind you 175 00:06:27,561 --> 00:06:29,780 that you're not the leader and you can't be the leader 176 00:06:29,780 --> 00:06:31,391 'cause you don't even know everyone's names. 177 00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:33,523 Mm, can you switch mine to "Donna"? 178 00:06:33,523 --> 00:06:35,482 - No. - Well, well, well. Looks like 179 00:06:35,482 --> 00:06:39,224 the Frigid Bitches are going up against the Hanging Monster Dong 180 00:06:39,224 --> 00:06:42,358 Lucky Strike Chili Cheese Fryers. 181 00:06:42,358 --> 00:06:43,838 Is that your name? That's really stupid. 182 00:06:43,838 --> 00:06:44,969 - It's too many ideas, man. - I told you it was stupid. 183 00:06:44,969 --> 00:06:46,493 I-I knew they were gonna make fun of us 184 00:06:46,493 --> 00:06:48,930 - and they did make fun of us. - Yeah, 'cause it's stupid. 185 00:06:48,930 --> 00:06:50,584 You know what? Uh, but it doesn't matter, 186 00:06:50,584 --> 00:06:51,976 'cause you guys are dead meat. 187 00:06:51,976 --> 00:06:54,979 Hey, did Dee happen to tell you the history 188 00:06:54,979 --> 00:06:56,590 of her experience with bowling? 189 00:06:56,590 --> 00:06:59,201 - No. - You should tell them, you should tell them. 190 00:06:59,201 --> 00:07:01,551 - You tell them, you tell them. - Tell them, tell them. - I-I was about to. 191 00:07:01,551 --> 00:07:03,553 - I don't know. - Oh, you were? - I was about to. Yes. 192 00:07:03,553 --> 00:07:05,816 - Are we doing the laugh? - He's gonna tell you. 193 00:07:05,816 --> 00:07:07,514 - Are we doing laughs? - Yeah, uh, no. I'll just tell it. 194 00:07:07,514 --> 00:07:09,777 - He's gonna tell you. - Okay, well, when she was a kid, 195 00:07:09,777 --> 00:07:12,432 she was, well, she was pretty decent. 196 00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:14,564 And I got to say, she worked really, really hard at it. 197 00:07:14,564 --> 00:07:18,263 So, she eventually became the captain of the girls' team. 198 00:07:18,263 --> 00:07:19,526 Can you believe that? 199 00:07:19,526 --> 00:07:22,050 Now, I'm no fan of women's sports. 200 00:07:22,050 --> 00:07:24,008 - Who is? - Yeah, they're not very popular. - Nobody is. 201 00:07:24,008 --> 00:07:25,532 Nobody watches... Especially women. 202 00:07:25,532 --> 00:07:26,533 Women don't even like women's sports. 203 00:07:26,533 --> 00:07:28,535 So I wouldn't have it. 204 00:07:28,535 --> 00:07:31,538 And to prove that Dee's female mind 205 00:07:31,538 --> 00:07:33,061 was mentally weak, 206 00:07:33,061 --> 00:07:35,063 I started to go watch her, 207 00:07:35,063 --> 00:07:38,414 and I would say, "gutter ball" 208 00:07:38,414 --> 00:07:41,765 right before she rolled it, and wouldn't you know it, 209 00:07:41,765 --> 00:07:44,638 every time I said it, 210 00:07:44,638 --> 00:07:47,510 she'd roll a gutter ball. 211 00:07:47,510 --> 00:07:49,251 Since then, 212 00:07:49,251 --> 00:07:51,819 if I even so much as look at Dee when she bowls, 213 00:07:51,819 --> 00:07:54,256 she can't knock down a single pin. 214 00:07:54,256 --> 00:07:57,520 Not even one. 215 00:08:00,001 --> 00:08:02,220 Well, that's a bit of an exaggeration. 216 00:08:02,220 --> 00:08:03,787 Anyway, good luck out there. 217 00:08:03,787 --> 00:08:06,050 - Mm. - Ladies. 218 00:08:06,050 --> 00:08:08,052 Gentlemen. 219 00:08:08,052 --> 00:08:08,966 - That was so good. - That was really good. 220 00:08:08,966 --> 00:08:10,126 That was really good, Dennis. 221 00:08:13,057 --> 00:08:14,624 All right, I'm looking at their lineup and I'm wondering 222 00:08:14,624 --> 00:08:15,799 who should lead us off against Snail. 223 00:08:15,799 --> 00:08:17,279 I'll start. It'll be good 224 00:08:17,279 --> 00:08:19,107 to show our power and dominance, you know, 225 00:08:19,107 --> 00:08:20,587 - for intimidation. - Uh, Frank? 226 00:08:20,587 --> 00:08:22,589 You should go against Artemis. She's next. 227 00:08:22,589 --> 00:08:24,286 Okay? And-and you should go up after that, 'cause it's 228 00:08:24,286 --> 00:08:25,896 The Waitress, and you're gonna irritate the shit 229 00:08:25,896 --> 00:08:27,115 - out of her and that-that's a good thing, okay? - Yeah. 230 00:08:27,115 --> 00:08:28,638 Oh, shit. 231 00:08:28,638 --> 00:08:30,597 - What? - Uh... 232 00:08:30,597 --> 00:08:32,033 Some kid's having, like, a birthday party in the arcade 233 00:08:32,033 --> 00:08:33,861 - or something. - Okay. So what? 234 00:08:33,861 --> 00:08:36,341 - It looks fun. - Charlie, do not be that guy 235 00:08:36,341 --> 00:08:37,865 that everyone's looking for when it's their turn. 236 00:08:37,865 --> 00:08:39,475 - Oh, yeah. Yeah. - That shit drives me crazy. 237 00:08:39,475 --> 00:08:41,216 - Please don't be that guy. - Yeah. Yeah. 238 00:08:41,216 --> 00:08:42,913 Okay, I'll go last against Dee because it's gonna be 239 00:08:42,913 --> 00:08:44,872 a lot of fun getting in her head, so... 240 00:08:44,872 --> 00:08:46,656 It's gonna really mess her up. It's gonna be awesome. 241 00:08:46,656 --> 00:08:48,876 All right. Hands in, boys. Say it on three. 242 00:08:48,876 --> 00:08:50,921 - Hanging Monster Ch... - Now I'm forgetting it. 243 00:08:50,921 --> 00:08:52,575 Chili Cheese Fryers! 244 00:08:52,575 --> 00:08:54,375 - Cheese fries. Yeah. - Oh, now I should go... 245 00:08:56,666 --> 00:08:58,494 Let's do it, bud. 246 00:08:58,494 --> 00:08:59,713 Let's go, man. 247 00:08:59,713 --> 00:09:02,585 Stride, stride, stride, execute. 248 00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:07,590 - Okay, not bad, not bad, Mac. - Not bad. 249 00:09:07,590 --> 00:09:08,896 Not bad, dude. 250 00:09:08,896 --> 00:09:09,723 Come on, Snail. 251 00:09:09,723 --> 00:09:10,724 What the... 252 00:09:10,724 --> 00:09:12,464 What? What? 253 00:09:12,464 --> 00:09:13,465 Okay, 254 00:09:13,465 --> 00:09:14,684 why are you so happy right now? 255 00:09:14,684 --> 00:09:16,120 Gail. What the hell was that? 256 00:09:16,120 --> 00:09:18,514 - Ooh, my cooter's on fire for Mac. - Ew. 257 00:09:18,514 --> 00:09:20,560 I want to have his baby. 258 00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:22,692 Your cooter is most likely on fire from a yeast infection. 259 00:09:22,692 --> 00:09:24,868 Go in the bathroom, rinse it out and be better next time. 260 00:09:24,868 --> 00:09:27,741 Dennis, cover me. Cover me. 261 00:09:27,741 --> 00:09:31,048 Ryan's eyeballing me and I'm trying to mix these. 262 00:09:31,048 --> 00:09:32,310 - I can't do that right now. - What? Just go, go... 263 00:09:32,310 --> 00:09:33,616 - No, I got... - Go stand over here. 264 00:09:33,616 --> 00:09:35,618 I got Liam over here eyeballing me. 265 00:09:35,618 --> 00:09:37,751 I mean, I... 266 00:09:37,751 --> 00:09:39,831 I think he is. Little hard to tell with the eyepatch. 267 00:09:41,319 --> 00:09:42,364 Ah. Anyway, it's your, it's your roll, man. 268 00:09:42,364 --> 00:09:43,844 - Go, go, go. Go, yeah. - Oh. I'm up? 269 00:09:43,844 --> 00:09:44,975 - Yes, you're up. - Up. 270 00:09:47,761 --> 00:09:50,546 - Artemis. - Frank. 271 00:09:50,546 --> 00:09:52,983 How about we, uh, test out the back seat 272 00:09:52,983 --> 00:09:55,769 of my LeBaron after the roll? 273 00:09:55,769 --> 00:09:57,771 Everybody stop trying to have sex with each other. 274 00:09:57,771 --> 00:09:58,859 Hey, you know, another reason why 275 00:09:58,859 --> 00:09:59,773 men and women can't compete, Dee. 276 00:09:59,773 --> 00:10:01,165 It's too sexually charged. 277 00:10:01,165 --> 00:10:02,689 Come on. 278 00:10:02,689 --> 00:10:04,168 - All right. - Donna Brunswick... 279 00:10:09,565 --> 00:10:10,740 Strike. 280 00:10:10,740 --> 00:10:12,612 - Oh! - Hey! 281 00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:13,961 Nice. 282 00:10:13,961 --> 00:10:16,441 - Artemis, you can bowl? - No. 283 00:10:16,441 --> 00:10:19,227 My character can. Me, I can't bowl for shit. 284 00:10:19,227 --> 00:10:21,055 Oh. 285 00:10:24,362 --> 00:10:25,668 Oh, my God. 286 00:10:30,760 --> 00:10:31,935 It's not gonna make it. 287 00:10:38,594 --> 00:10:39,595 Strike. 288 00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:41,989 - Oh, ho. - Oh. 289 00:10:41,989 --> 00:10:42,729 All right, Frank. 290 00:10:42,729 --> 00:10:44,687 Good job, Frank. 291 00:10:44,687 --> 00:10:46,602 - All right, Frank. - What? Oh, bullshit. 292 00:10:46,602 --> 00:10:47,951 No, come on, that doesn't count. 293 00:10:47,951 --> 00:10:49,257 Uh, no, the computer counted it, so it counts. 294 00:10:49,257 --> 00:10:51,563 - That counts. - Hey, Artemis, let's mush. 295 00:10:51,563 --> 00:10:53,478 What? No. No. You're not gonna miss your turn, okay? 296 00:10:53,478 --> 00:10:54,958 If you must mush, mush later. 297 00:10:54,958 --> 00:10:55,959 A quickie. 298 00:10:55,959 --> 00:10:58,396 - Quickie it is. - What? 299 00:10:58,396 --> 00:11:00,442 My character is also a giant whore, which is what 300 00:11:00,442 --> 00:11:01,965 attracted me to the role in the first place, so... 301 00:11:01,965 --> 00:11:03,706 - No. No, no. - Come on, you can't go now. 302 00:11:03,706 --> 00:11:05,621 Well, mush fast! 303 00:11:08,058 --> 00:11:09,407 - Come on. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 304 00:11:09,407 --> 00:11:10,626 I'm going, I'm going. Oh! 305 00:11:10,626 --> 00:11:12,846 Hey, Tyrone, do not take my spot! 306 00:11:12,846 --> 00:11:15,805 Do not take my spot at the air hockey table. 307 00:11:15,805 --> 00:11:17,589 - Charlie, shut up. - You should see the party they got going there. 308 00:11:17,589 --> 00:11:18,808 - It's great. They got one of those... - I don't care. 309 00:11:18,808 --> 00:11:20,505 punching machines that rates how, like, 310 00:11:20,505 --> 00:11:21,942 - how much power you have in your punch. - I don't care. 311 00:11:21,942 --> 00:11:23,030 - Shut up, I'm trying to focus. - It's totally crazy. 312 00:11:23,030 --> 00:11:24,379 By the way, your hair looks great. 313 00:11:24,379 --> 00:11:26,250 Charlie, shut up, I'm trying to focus. 314 00:11:26,250 --> 00:11:28,035 - Did you, like, change your hair or something? - Oh, my God. 315 00:11:28,035 --> 00:11:29,993 Elbow in, slight bend in the knee, 316 00:11:29,993 --> 00:11:31,734 - and... - What the... 317 00:11:31,734 --> 00:11:33,257 Oh... 318 00:11:33,257 --> 00:11:34,519 - God! - Tyrone! 319 00:11:35,912 --> 00:11:37,609 All right. I'm coming! 320 00:11:37,609 --> 00:11:39,002 - Charlie, Charlie, where you going? - Where you going? 321 00:11:39,002 --> 00:11:40,743 - Put the cake down... - I'll be back. 322 00:11:42,789 --> 00:11:44,834 - Dee, you want to go first? - Don't... Stop it. 323 00:11:44,834 --> 00:11:46,531 - I know what you're doing. - I'm not gonna say anything. 324 00:11:46,531 --> 00:11:47,837 I swear to God. Please, I insist. 325 00:11:47,837 --> 00:11:49,796 I'm not. 326 00:11:49,796 --> 00:11:52,102 - Fine. - All right. Come on, Dee. 327 00:11:54,365 --> 00:11:55,671 Gutter ball. 328 00:11:55,671 --> 00:11:57,847 You-you dick. 329 00:11:57,847 --> 00:11:59,501 - Sorry. I'm sorry. - That's not funny. 330 00:11:59,501 --> 00:12:01,808 I couldn't resist. It's... Sorry. 331 00:12:08,684 --> 00:12:09,903 Strike. 332 00:12:10,860 --> 00:12:12,775 Don't say it again. 333 00:12:12,775 --> 00:12:15,778 - Okay? Just leave me alone. - I'm not. I just... I'm not. 334 00:12:15,778 --> 00:12:16,823 Gutter ball. 335 00:12:16,823 --> 00:12:19,477 You goddamned son of a bitch! 336 00:12:20,827 --> 00:12:22,872 How are you gonna talk to me about form 337 00:12:22,872 --> 00:12:25,527 - after you bowl like that? - Get off my back, you frigid bitch. 338 00:12:25,527 --> 00:12:27,137 I knew inviting you was a bad idea. 339 00:12:27,137 --> 00:12:28,573 Well, then, don't invite me. Then don't invite me next time. 340 00:12:28,573 --> 00:12:30,227 I didn't invite... 341 00:12:30,227 --> 00:12:32,926 Oh, isn't this fun? 342 00:12:32,926 --> 00:12:36,277 Yeah. Yet another reason why women can't compete with men. 343 00:12:36,277 --> 00:12:38,148 Besides your physical limitations, 344 00:12:38,148 --> 00:12:40,281 if given the opportunity to either work together 345 00:12:40,281 --> 00:12:43,327 as a team or tear each other apart, 346 00:12:43,327 --> 00:12:45,329 you will always choose the latter. 347 00:12:45,329 --> 00:12:47,549 Because women are 348 00:12:47,549 --> 00:12:50,334 devious a-and destructive 349 00:12:50,334 --> 00:12:53,250 and will always default to using their insidious venom 350 00:12:53,250 --> 00:12:55,383 on the most sought-after victim of all... 351 00:12:56,863 --> 00:12:58,690 each other. 352 00:13:02,999 --> 00:13:04,914 Okay, Dennis is right. Just hear me out. 353 00:13:04,914 --> 00:13:07,264 If we want to win, we can't compete like men, 354 00:13:07,264 --> 00:13:09,614 but what we can do is use those skills 355 00:13:09,614 --> 00:13:11,965 of mental manipulation against them. 356 00:13:11,965 --> 00:13:13,314 Do you want to know why? 357 00:13:13,314 --> 00:13:14,576 Why? 358 00:13:14,576 --> 00:13:17,622 Because... they're stupid. 359 00:13:21,017 --> 00:13:23,628 Hey, Mac, how come you throw the ball so straight? 360 00:13:23,628 --> 00:13:25,935 I throw the ball straight because, as a man, 361 00:13:25,935 --> 00:13:28,068 dominance is my sporting style. 362 00:13:28,068 --> 00:13:30,984 Uh, I heard it's 'cause you have no finesse. 363 00:13:30,984 --> 00:13:33,638 - You don't know how to spin the ball. - What? 364 00:13:33,638 --> 00:13:34,944 - Yeah. - I have finesse. I could spin the ball. 365 00:13:34,944 --> 00:13:36,293 - You want to see me? - Yeah. 366 00:13:36,293 --> 00:13:37,729 - Yeah... - Hey, uh, Mac? Mac? 367 00:13:37,729 --> 00:13:38,905 Can I talk to you for a second? 368 00:13:38,905 --> 00:13:39,906 Yeah. 369 00:13:39,906 --> 00:13:42,430 Do not try and spin the ball. 370 00:13:42,430 --> 00:13:44,867 She said that I can't spin, and I can spin. 371 00:13:44,867 --> 00:13:46,434 - You... Do not try it. - But Dennis, she said I have no finesse, 372 00:13:46,434 --> 00:13:48,088 - and you know that I have finesse. - Don't-don't do it. 373 00:13:48,088 --> 00:13:49,089 - Don't do it. Just play your game. - Can I just spin one? 374 00:13:49,089 --> 00:13:50,003 - I don't care... - Let me spin one. 375 00:13:50,003 --> 00:13:51,526 You don't need to spin it. 376 00:13:51,526 --> 00:13:52,962 You just play your game and we're gonna win. 377 00:13:52,962 --> 00:13:54,224 Okay? Do not spin it. 378 00:13:54,224 --> 00:13:55,443 Do not do it. 379 00:13:57,619 --> 00:13:59,099 Okay, fine. 380 00:13:59,099 --> 00:14:00,970 I won't, I won't spin it. 381 00:14:02,015 --> 00:14:03,407 I won't. 382 00:14:07,107 --> 00:14:08,673 Stride, stride, stride, spin! 383 00:14:10,284 --> 00:14:11,589 Oh, goddamn it! 384 00:14:11,589 --> 00:14:13,635 - Gutter ball. - Uh-oh. 385 00:14:13,635 --> 00:14:14,984 - I'm gonna try it again. - I'm coming, I'm coming. 386 00:14:14,984 --> 00:14:15,985 Wait, I'm coming, I'm coming. 387 00:14:15,985 --> 00:14:18,074 Hey, Tyrone, double or nothing! 388 00:14:18,074 --> 00:14:19,032 'Cause there's no way you're beating me 389 00:14:19,032 --> 00:14:20,337 two out of three, dude! 390 00:14:20,337 --> 00:14:22,339 Hey, Charlie? Excuse me. 391 00:14:22,339 --> 00:14:24,037 Can I, can I ask your advice on something? 392 00:14:24,037 --> 00:14:26,387 - Yeah. - Well, you're just such a good natural bowler... 393 00:14:26,387 --> 00:14:27,344 - Yeah. - ... and I'm having a hard time, so I was wondering, 394 00:14:27,344 --> 00:14:29,346 where are you putting your elbow 395 00:14:29,346 --> 00:14:31,087 - when you're rolling? - My elbow? 396 00:14:31,087 --> 00:14:32,610 Yeah, before you throw the ball, where is your elbow going? 397 00:14:32,610 --> 00:14:34,612 You-you want me to show you where my elbow goes? 398 00:14:34,612 --> 00:14:36,788 - Yeah. - Oh, I'm... 399 00:14:36,788 --> 00:14:38,703 - My-my elbow's like... - Uh-huh. 400 00:14:38,703 --> 00:14:40,618 That looks good. 401 00:14:41,532 --> 00:14:42,925 Oh. 402 00:14:42,925 --> 00:14:44,274 Gutter ball. 403 00:14:44,274 --> 00:14:45,580 Uh... 404 00:14:45,580 --> 00:14:47,234 Holy shit. It's working. 405 00:14:52,021 --> 00:14:53,501 - There we go. - Okay. 406 00:14:53,501 --> 00:14:54,981 Okay. It's okay. 407 00:14:54,981 --> 00:14:56,243 Damn it! 408 00:14:56,243 --> 00:14:58,506 - Just walk. - What are you doing? 409 00:14:58,506 --> 00:15:01,074 Stride, stride, stride, spin! Come on! 410 00:15:01,074 --> 00:15:03,641 - Gutter ball. - S-Stop it. 411 00:15:03,641 --> 00:15:06,993 Gutter ball. 412 00:15:06,993 --> 00:15:08,124 - Gutter ball. - Come on. 413 00:15:09,125 --> 00:15:12,302 Gutter ball. 414 00:15:21,659 --> 00:15:23,009 You want one? 415 00:15:33,019 --> 00:15:34,934 Wh... Hey! 416 00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:35,847 What happened? 417 00:15:35,847 --> 00:15:37,632 What the hell happened? 418 00:15:37,632 --> 00:15:39,982 In the third act of my play, Donna rolls a gutter ball 419 00:15:39,982 --> 00:15:42,115 in the big match against her rival high school. 420 00:15:42,115 --> 00:15:44,160 - Are you serious? - Oh, my God. 421 00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:45,840 Can you knock it off with the play, please? 422 00:15:52,603 --> 00:15:55,693 Ah, well, well, you done good, ladies. 423 00:15:55,693 --> 00:15:58,000 Your little mind games... they got you pretty far, 424 00:15:58,000 --> 00:16:00,785 but unfortunately... 425 00:16:00,785 --> 00:16:03,440 still 11 points shy in the final frame. 426 00:16:03,440 --> 00:16:06,269 Now, technically, I could pick up this spare 427 00:16:06,269 --> 00:16:08,532 and push the lead even further, and I... 428 00:16:08,532 --> 00:16:10,665 think we all know Dee's about to roll two gutter balls. 429 00:16:10,665 --> 00:16:12,797 So I'll tell you what. Dee, if you would like, 430 00:16:12,797 --> 00:16:15,496 uh, you could just quit now 431 00:16:15,496 --> 00:16:17,933 and you could all admit that you're inferior 432 00:16:17,933 --> 00:16:20,022 in every single way, 433 00:16:20,022 --> 00:16:21,502 and we could just call it a night. 434 00:16:21,502 --> 00:16:23,199 Okay, you know what, dick? 435 00:16:23,199 --> 00:16:26,028 I don't like your sister. She's a terrible person. 436 00:16:26,028 --> 00:16:27,464 She's a bitch and she's ugly 437 00:16:27,464 --> 00:16:28,813 and I didn't want her on the team. 438 00:16:28,813 --> 00:16:30,119 And she's gross. 439 00:16:30,119 --> 00:16:31,773 Sure, and she's gross. 440 00:16:31,773 --> 00:16:34,036 But you know what? You're even worse. 441 00:16:34,036 --> 00:16:35,385 And I am not gonna sit here 442 00:16:35,385 --> 00:16:37,083 and let you just shit on her all night long. 443 00:16:37,083 --> 00:16:40,042 You think you're physically superior? 444 00:16:40,042 --> 00:16:43,306 - Yeah. - Then I challenge you to a test of strength. 445 00:16:43,306 --> 00:16:44,786 Come on. 446 00:16:44,786 --> 00:16:46,222 This isn't fair. 447 00:16:46,222 --> 00:16:47,789 Oh. Is it not fair? 448 00:16:47,789 --> 00:16:50,052 Okay, well, if you're scared, we don't have to do it. 449 00:16:50,052 --> 00:16:52,228 Okay, well, listen, if you insist, that's fine. 450 00:16:52,228 --> 00:16:53,838 - I do. Okay. - Let's do it. Yeah. 451 00:16:53,838 --> 00:16:55,144 Ladies first. 452 00:16:55,144 --> 00:16:57,016 - All right, let's do it. - Oh, thank you. 453 00:16:57,016 --> 00:16:58,234 Go, Waitress, go. 454 00:16:58,234 --> 00:17:00,019 - Let's go. - Give it all you got. 455 00:17:01,542 --> 00:17:03,283 Oh! 456 00:17:04,762 --> 00:17:06,851 Shit. 457 00:17:06,851 --> 00:17:08,853 - Didn't know you could kick it. - Oh, yeah, you could kick it. 458 00:17:08,853 --> 00:17:10,942 - And that's fine. Okay. - Yeah, yeah, okay. Do it. 459 00:17:10,942 --> 00:17:12,422 Show them what you got, Dennis. Come on. 460 00:17:12,422 --> 00:17:15,251 Let's go, buddy. 461 00:17:15,251 --> 00:17:18,080 I summon the very fact that I am a man! 462 00:17:25,087 --> 00:17:28,308 Aah! Aah... 463 00:17:28,308 --> 00:17:29,874 I have defeated you. 464 00:17:29,874 --> 00:17:31,224 And of course I have. 465 00:17:31,224 --> 00:17:33,748 I've been blessed with the genetic gifts to do so. 466 00:17:37,882 --> 00:17:40,146 I've broken every single bone in my hand. 467 00:17:40,146 --> 00:17:41,973 I cannot bowl. 468 00:17:41,973 --> 00:17:43,584 - What? - Really? - L-Listen to me. 469 00:17:43,584 --> 00:17:44,846 There's nothing solid left in there. 470 00:17:44,846 --> 00:17:47,631 It's just bloody soup and bone broth. 471 00:17:47,631 --> 00:17:49,155 All right? Now, I need to scream. 472 00:17:49,155 --> 00:17:50,373 And I need you to find me somewhere to scream 473 00:17:50,373 --> 00:17:52,114 so I don't have to do it here. 474 00:17:52,114 --> 00:17:54,160 No, wait a minute. 475 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:56,205 I'm going to scream here, and now, 476 00:17:56,205 --> 00:17:57,805 'cause I can't hold it in, so here we go. 477 00:18:01,384 --> 00:18:04,083 Ryan, I need you to bowl for me. 478 00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:05,388 I'll never bowl again. 479 00:18:05,388 --> 00:18:06,998 - Come on, man. - Why not? What's the big deal? 480 00:18:06,998 --> 00:18:10,132 The story's too horrible to tell. 481 00:18:10,132 --> 00:18:11,307 - Oh, with this stuff. - For fuck's sake, just spit it out. 482 00:18:11,307 --> 00:18:13,135 Yeah, you clearly want to tell it, man. 483 00:18:13,135 --> 00:18:14,789 Fine. 484 00:18:14,789 --> 00:18:16,138 But brace yourself. 485 00:18:16,138 --> 00:18:18,184 There I was, 486 00:18:18,184 --> 00:18:20,011 practicing for the state semifinals. 487 00:18:23,754 --> 00:18:25,234 I was on my way to a perfect game. 488 00:18:29,543 --> 00:18:32,285 I was enjoying some chili cheese fries. 489 00:18:32,285 --> 00:18:34,809 They were delicious, and I offered some to Ryan. 490 00:18:34,809 --> 00:18:37,072 I accepted, but not realizing 491 00:18:37,072 --> 00:18:39,292 my other hand was in the ball return lane. 492 00:18:39,292 --> 00:18:41,642 I never should have allowed myself such indulgences, 493 00:18:41,642 --> 00:18:43,296 because little did I know, 494 00:18:43,296 --> 00:18:45,820 my ball was returning. 495 00:18:52,914 --> 00:18:55,134 It pinched it really bad. 496 00:18:55,134 --> 00:18:57,266 I had a nasty bruise for a week. 497 00:18:57,266 --> 00:18:58,659 - That's it? - That's why you won't bowl? 498 00:18:58,659 --> 00:18:59,921 - You pinched your finger? - You pinched your finger 499 00:18:59,921 --> 00:19:01,096 - and you won't bowl? - Big deal, man. 500 00:19:01,096 --> 00:19:03,054 I'll bowl for you... Dennis. 501 00:19:03,054 --> 00:19:04,447 - Okay, fine. - Okay. - Wait, what's happening? 502 00:19:04,447 --> 00:19:05,753 What-what are you saying? What? 503 00:19:05,753 --> 00:19:06,841 - Hmm? - Well, he... 504 00:19:06,841 --> 00:19:08,059 - Nothing. - What? 505 00:19:08,059 --> 00:19:09,235 - N-Nothing. - What's going on? 506 00:19:09,235 --> 00:19:11,628 Liam's gonna bowl for me 507 00:19:11,628 --> 00:19:13,717 because I hurt my hand a little bit. 508 00:19:13,717 --> 00:19:15,502 O-Ow! 509 00:19:15,502 --> 00:19:17,504 Ow, I just, I just twisted my ankle. 510 00:19:17,504 --> 00:19:18,853 - No. - Yeah, and I need Ryan, 511 00:19:18,853 --> 00:19:20,289 I need Ryan to bowl for me. 512 00:19:20,289 --> 00:19:21,508 - No way. No way. - My ankle is hurt, 513 00:19:21,508 --> 00:19:23,074 and I need Ryan to bowl for me. 514 00:19:23,074 --> 00:19:24,337 - That... - That is bullshit. 515 00:19:28,515 --> 00:19:30,995 This is incredibly weird. 516 00:19:50,754 --> 00:19:52,800 Ryan! 517 00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:55,019 Brother! Brother, what have I done? 518 00:19:57,935 --> 00:19:59,546 No! 519 00:20:02,331 --> 00:20:03,289 What the... 520 00:20:09,817 --> 00:20:11,297 Well, well, well, Dee, it looks like 521 00:20:11,297 --> 00:20:12,733 you're gonna have to roll after all. 522 00:20:12,733 --> 00:20:15,518 Fine. No problem. 523 00:20:15,518 --> 00:20:17,825 Gonna make my team proud. 524 00:20:17,825 --> 00:20:19,305 Oh, well, maybe you will. 525 00:20:19,305 --> 00:20:21,045 Or maybe... 526 00:20:21,045 --> 00:20:22,351 you'll roll a gutter ball. 527 00:20:27,791 --> 00:20:30,490 One pin. That's all. 528 00:20:30,490 --> 00:20:32,231 You can do this. 529 00:20:32,231 --> 00:20:34,537 - Gutter ball. - No. No. 530 00:20:34,537 --> 00:20:36,496 Just don't think "gutter ball," that's all. 531 00:20:39,281 --> 00:20:40,543 Oh, hi, Dee. 532 00:20:40,543 --> 00:20:42,850 I'm in here, too. 533 00:20:42,850 --> 00:20:44,243 Gutter ball. 534 00:20:46,375 --> 00:20:50,118 - Gutter ball. Gutter ball. - Gutter ball. Gutter ball. 535 00:20:51,554 --> 00:20:53,513 You goddamned son of a... 536 00:20:53,513 --> 00:20:55,471 bitch! 537 00:21:03,218 --> 00:21:04,393 Gutter ball. 538 00:21:14,925 --> 00:21:17,232 - Oh. - No, no... 539 00:21:18,929 --> 00:21:20,627 - No, no, no... - No, no... 540 00:21:20,627 --> 00:21:22,716 No, no, no, no... 541 00:21:28,678 --> 00:21:31,464 I did it! In your faces. 542 00:21:31,464 --> 00:21:33,770 Ha... Uh... What's going on? 543 00:21:33,770 --> 00:21:36,382 - Where'd everybody go? - Frank's having a threesome 544 00:21:36,382 --> 00:21:38,427 in the bathroom with Gail and Artemis, 545 00:21:38,427 --> 00:21:41,387 and, um, yeah, I think the guys went to the Sixers game. 546 00:21:41,387 --> 00:21:43,389 What? 547 00:21:43,389 --> 00:21:44,433 Oh, goddamn it. 548 00:21:45,695 --> 00:21:47,349 Well, why aren't you celebrating? 549 00:21:47,349 --> 00:21:48,655 Um... 550 00:21:48,655 --> 00:21:51,353 yeah, honestly? 551 00:21:51,353 --> 00:21:54,051 I don't give a shit about women's sports. 552 00:21:54,051 --> 00:21:56,140 Well...