1 00:00:02,522 --> 00:00:04,378 What am I most afraid of? 2 00:00:04,781 --> 00:00:05,778 Let's see. 3 00:00:05,946 --> 00:00:07,197 Global warming. 4 00:00:07,629 --> 00:00:08,867 And getting a "B." 5 00:00:09,077 --> 00:00:11,828 The phone ringing in the middle of the night. 6 00:00:11,953 --> 00:00:14,355 That I'm too much of a perfectionist. 7 00:00:14,814 --> 00:00:16,450 Honey, this isn't a job interview. 8 00:00:16,575 --> 00:00:17,873 Oh, man. 9 00:00:19,097 --> 00:00:20,240 Job interviews. 10 00:00:20,850 --> 00:00:21,850 Nothing. 11 00:00:22,228 --> 00:00:23,797 Right. What about the pigeons? 12 00:00:23,922 --> 00:00:26,435 I don't like them. They're shifty. 13 00:00:27,196 --> 00:00:28,497 Losing Mitchell. 14 00:00:30,924 --> 00:00:32,275 Hotel bedspreads. 15 00:00:33,667 --> 00:00:35,442 Never getting my driver's license. 16 00:00:35,567 --> 00:00:37,967 Or getting one and the picture sucks. 17 00:00:39,186 --> 00:00:40,287 Dying alone. 18 00:00:41,763 --> 00:00:42,893 Haley, sweetie, 19 00:00:43,061 --> 00:00:44,738 - did you find your shoes? - Not today. 20 00:00:44,864 --> 00:00:46,316 I just wanted to know. 21 00:00:46,484 --> 00:00:49,108 Why are you hounding me? I'm freaking out right now! 22 00:00:49,459 --> 00:00:51,786 You need to relax. It's just a driver's test. 23 00:00:51,911 --> 00:00:54,497 It's my third driver's test, and if I fail again, 24 00:00:54,622 --> 00:00:56,815 I have to wait six months to retake it. 25 00:00:56,940 --> 00:00:59,679 That's six more months of you driving me everywhere. 26 00:01:00,179 --> 00:01:01,823 I'm like, "No way I'm wearing that." 27 00:01:01,948 --> 00:01:04,471 And she was like, "If you don't wear it, then you can't play." 28 00:01:04,596 --> 00:01:06,743 And then I was like, "That's fine by me." 29 00:01:06,869 --> 00:01:09,158 - And she was like... - "Like. Like." 30 00:01:09,283 --> 00:01:11,090 - Stop! - Stop saying "like" all the time! 31 00:01:11,215 --> 00:01:13,526 - You're embarrassing me! - Like, like, like, like, like! 32 00:01:16,211 --> 00:01:17,236 Found your jacket. 33 00:01:17,421 --> 00:01:19,617 Why is everyone on me? 34 00:01:20,057 --> 00:01:20,979 God! 35 00:01:21,575 --> 00:01:23,724 Ignore her. She can't focus on two things at once. 36 00:01:24,035 --> 00:01:26,237 Always a good quality in a driver. 37 00:01:26,919 --> 00:01:28,943 We need to get you some shoes for the dance tonight. 38 00:01:29,112 --> 00:01:31,632 - No, we don't. I'm not going. - What are you talking about? 39 00:01:31,826 --> 00:01:35,456 - Why would you not be going? - Because school dances are lame. 40 00:01:35,935 --> 00:01:39,364 A bunch of immature boys trying to impress you with how cool they are 41 00:01:39,489 --> 00:01:41,256 when they're really just a bunch of dorks. 42 00:01:41,381 --> 00:01:43,652 Ready to go down under, mate? 43 00:01:45,930 --> 00:01:47,313 What are you doing? 44 00:01:47,481 --> 00:01:48,900 Treasure hunting. 45 00:01:50,840 --> 00:01:52,819 A few days ago, the cable guy was under the house. 46 00:01:52,944 --> 00:01:54,826 When he was leaving, he said to Haley, 47 00:01:54,951 --> 00:01:58,254 "Wow, that's quite a collection you've got down there." 48 00:01:58,511 --> 00:02:02,424 Here's the thing, we have no idea what he's talking about. 49 00:02:02,773 --> 00:02:06,518 All week, Luke and I have been getting more and more excited about it. 50 00:02:06,914 --> 00:02:09,283 I bet it's really cool old magazines. 51 00:02:10,507 --> 00:02:13,053 Or a bunch of necklaces made out of animal teeth. 52 00:02:13,178 --> 00:02:15,116 Or bugs frozen in amber. 53 00:02:15,704 --> 00:02:18,223 What if it's really expensive bottles of wine? 54 00:02:18,348 --> 00:02:19,586 Or a suit of armor. 55 00:02:20,013 --> 00:02:23,266 What if there's ancient indian arrowheads under there? 56 00:02:23,998 --> 00:02:25,633 What if it's gold bars? 57 00:02:25,758 --> 00:02:26,848 Oh, you think? 58 00:02:27,191 --> 00:02:30,694 For God's sakes, why don't you go under the house and look? 59 00:02:32,279 --> 00:02:34,558 Subtitles by Kevin & Tyno 60 00:02:34,683 --> 00:02:36,788 www.seriessub.com www.sous-titres.eu 61 00:02:47,722 --> 00:02:50,125 Hey, Cam. Where did we get this dolly from? 62 00:02:50,250 --> 00:02:53,362 From Janice and Olivia. They brought it over yesterday. Lily loves it. 63 00:02:53,530 --> 00:02:55,978 It seems a little frilly, you know, coming from them. 64 00:02:56,103 --> 00:02:57,354 Because they're lesbians? 65 00:02:57,479 --> 00:02:59,833 That's an offensive stereotype, don't you think? 66 00:03:00,002 --> 00:03:01,553 I suppose. I'm sorry. 67 00:03:01,833 --> 00:03:03,423 Did they bring back our coffee maker? 68 00:03:03,592 --> 00:03:05,636 No, it was too big, they were on their motorcycle. 69 00:03:06,448 --> 00:03:08,908 We got off to an awkward start with our pediatrician, 70 00:03:09,033 --> 00:03:10,936 - a very nice Asian lady... - Irrelevant. 71 00:03:11,061 --> 00:03:12,062 Dr. Miura. 72 00:03:12,187 --> 00:03:15,083 So I took the bold step of inviting her over for brunch. 73 00:03:15,208 --> 00:03:16,609 I'm sorry, "bold"? 74 00:03:17,079 --> 00:03:19,286 She said no patient had ever done it before. 75 00:03:19,411 --> 00:03:21,291 Subtext, "This is weird." 76 00:03:21,606 --> 00:03:23,408 I didn't hear any subtext. 77 00:03:24,107 --> 00:03:25,608 Do you hear any now? 78 00:03:28,429 --> 00:03:30,175 I don't even know why we're doing this. 79 00:03:30,300 --> 00:03:33,150 Because what if Lily gets sick and there's a Tamiflu shortage? 80 00:03:33,318 --> 00:03:36,677 Who do you think's gonna get it? The patients she likes, that's who. 81 00:03:36,803 --> 00:03:39,495 Maybe if you bake her a cake, she'll give us free X-rays. 82 00:03:39,664 --> 00:03:43,336 It's about making connections. Why does the dentist gives me that free stuff? 83 00:03:43,505 --> 00:03:45,716 Because he's a huge queen and he has a big crush on you. 84 00:03:48,138 --> 00:03:49,840 Really? Do you think so? 85 00:03:50,804 --> 00:03:51,805 Mom? 86 00:03:52,596 --> 00:03:55,563 - I have a fever. - Mi amor, come here, and I feel you. 87 00:03:55,688 --> 00:03:57,807 I don't want you to get you sick. It could be fatal. 88 00:03:57,932 --> 00:04:00,079 Then by all means, stand next to me. 89 00:04:00,247 --> 00:04:01,548 Let me feel you. 90 00:04:03,691 --> 00:04:05,693 Ay, papi, but you're not warm. 91 00:04:06,224 --> 00:04:09,527 Probably because you were cooking and your hands are warm. 92 00:04:09,652 --> 00:04:12,755 I'd better skip the party tomorrow just to be safe. 93 00:04:13,223 --> 00:04:14,661 Yeah, the party. 94 00:04:16,423 --> 00:04:17,238 What? 95 00:04:17,548 --> 00:04:18,549 The party. 96 00:04:19,621 --> 00:04:22,232 I understand about 20% of what goes on around here. 97 00:04:22,357 --> 00:04:24,329 The party is at an amusement park, 98 00:04:24,454 --> 00:04:26,699 and Manny is afraid of roller coasters. 99 00:04:26,825 --> 00:04:29,288 - Poor kid. - I wonder where he gets his fear from, 100 00:04:29,413 --> 00:04:31,328 because his father's not afraid of anything. 101 00:04:31,453 --> 00:04:34,845 No bulls, no heights, no helicopters, no fast cars. 102 00:04:34,970 --> 00:04:37,237 But go to dinner with him and wait for the check to come. 103 00:04:37,362 --> 00:04:39,563 Then you'll see fear in his eyes... 104 00:04:39,688 --> 00:04:41,490 Like the waiter's a ghost. 105 00:04:42,841 --> 00:04:44,292 - Excited? - Yeah. 106 00:04:44,589 --> 00:04:46,836 We're like Ponce de León and his son. 107 00:04:47,216 --> 00:04:48,367 Little Ponce. 108 00:04:48,940 --> 00:04:49,991 Who's that? 109 00:04:50,168 --> 00:04:51,870 Famous treasure hunters. 110 00:04:52,053 --> 00:04:53,515 His name was Ponce? 111 00:04:53,686 --> 00:04:55,585 He'd get made fun of at my school. 112 00:04:55,710 --> 00:04:57,863 They'd probably call him "Pants." 113 00:04:58,724 --> 00:04:59,725 "Pants." 114 00:05:00,320 --> 00:05:02,549 Or maybe, "Fancy ponce." 115 00:05:03,706 --> 00:05:04,968 That's a good one. 116 00:05:05,322 --> 00:05:06,252 All right. 117 00:05:07,237 --> 00:05:08,438 Let's do this. 118 00:05:10,462 --> 00:05:11,663 You okay, dad? 119 00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:13,388 Yeah, I am. Yep. 120 00:05:13,682 --> 00:05:16,412 Gonna take a little more than getting trapped in a small, dark space 121 00:05:16,537 --> 00:05:19,073 with a wild animal to rattle your old man. 122 00:05:19,198 --> 00:05:22,010 You never want your kids to see you scared. You want to be that rock 123 00:05:22,135 --> 00:05:24,888 that they can grab ahold of in a stormy sea. 124 00:05:25,099 --> 00:05:28,050 Actually, a rock would sink, so a floating rock. 125 00:05:28,310 --> 00:05:29,391 Let's start over. 126 00:05:29,516 --> 00:05:32,425 It's windy, and you've got a lot of papers. 127 00:05:34,684 --> 00:05:36,236 Let's do this, buddy. 128 00:05:40,371 --> 00:05:43,024 Good recon. Got the lay of the land, so... 129 00:05:43,290 --> 00:05:44,741 Aren't we going in? 130 00:05:45,080 --> 00:05:47,055 We are, but won't it be fun 131 00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:50,258 if we did it with ski goggles and barbecue tools? 132 00:05:50,787 --> 00:05:51,788 I guess. 133 00:05:52,853 --> 00:05:54,202 Yeah, let's do that. 134 00:05:54,327 --> 00:05:55,328 All right. 135 00:05:58,500 --> 00:06:00,402 Can I just say, that is a lovely outfit? 136 00:06:01,149 --> 00:06:01,960 Thank you. 137 00:06:02,085 --> 00:06:05,332 Nice to see you out of your lab coat. You actually have quite a nice figure. 138 00:06:05,596 --> 00:06:07,622 Take it down a notch. We're trying to make a friend, 139 00:06:07,747 --> 00:06:09,499 not initiate a three-way. 140 00:06:12,994 --> 00:06:14,140 Lily looks great. 141 00:06:14,348 --> 00:06:16,245 Do you think so? Shouldn't she have more teeth? 142 00:06:16,370 --> 00:06:19,384 I see kids running around at the park, and they look like sharks. 143 00:06:19,698 --> 00:06:21,455 Don't worry. She's perfect. 144 00:06:22,032 --> 00:06:23,257 Aren't you, Lily? 145 00:06:23,487 --> 00:06:25,096 Look how calm she is with you. 146 00:06:25,286 --> 00:06:27,115 She's usually very fidgety around new people. 147 00:06:27,240 --> 00:06:30,011 I just think she senses you're gonna be a good friend for her 148 00:06:30,136 --> 00:06:32,314 during in good times and flu season. 149 00:06:33,346 --> 00:06:34,347 Mommy! 150 00:06:36,110 --> 00:06:37,361 Did she just... 151 00:06:37,486 --> 00:06:38,938 Did she just say... 152 00:06:42,156 --> 00:06:45,200 Her first word was every gay father's worst nightmare. 153 00:06:46,050 --> 00:06:47,018 Mommy. 154 00:06:51,338 --> 00:06:54,883 He won't admit, but I know that Manny's sad because he's missing the party. 155 00:06:55,008 --> 00:06:57,047 Let's take him somewhere to take his mind off it. 156 00:06:57,172 --> 00:06:59,470 I could have guessed he'd have trouble with roller coasters. 157 00:06:59,595 --> 00:07:02,610 He gets woozy at barbershops when they spin his chair towards the mirror. 158 00:07:02,779 --> 00:07:05,109 How about we take him to the pier and go fishing? 159 00:07:06,316 --> 00:07:07,667 He likes to fish? 160 00:07:08,247 --> 00:07:11,450 He comes from a long line of fishermen and smugglers. 161 00:07:11,626 --> 00:07:13,112 But I encourage the fishing. 162 00:07:13,424 --> 00:07:15,777 - You like to fish? - Fishing? Yeah. 163 00:07:16,236 --> 00:07:18,016 You want to go to the pier today? 164 00:07:18,841 --> 00:07:21,493 Is this a trick to see if I'm really sick? 165 00:07:21,983 --> 00:07:24,570 Maybe the fresh air will make you feel better. 166 00:07:25,151 --> 00:07:27,865 Then, yeah, 'cause there's no place where I'm more at one with... 167 00:07:28,079 --> 00:07:29,371 Just get your coat. 168 00:07:29,684 --> 00:07:31,247 - Are you nervous? - Shut up, Alex. 169 00:07:31,372 --> 00:07:33,795 I was just asking. I'd be nervous if I were you. 170 00:07:33,920 --> 00:07:35,756 Leave your sister alone. She's gonna be fine. 171 00:07:35,882 --> 00:07:37,575 As long as I don't get the same guy. 172 00:07:37,700 --> 00:07:39,285 - He's so mean! - You probably will. 173 00:07:39,410 --> 00:07:40,978 - You won't. - He hates me. 174 00:07:41,103 --> 00:07:43,191 - He doesn't hate you. - He yelled at me. 175 00:07:43,359 --> 00:07:46,053 - You drove into the bushes. - Oh, no, it's him. 176 00:07:46,178 --> 00:07:48,493 Please don't be for me. Please don't be for me... 177 00:07:49,274 --> 00:07:50,089 Hi. 178 00:07:51,613 --> 00:07:52,815 Oh, thank God. 179 00:07:53,968 --> 00:07:55,169 Well, come on. 180 00:07:56,112 --> 00:07:57,553 I don't have all day. 181 00:07:58,404 --> 00:08:00,810 - I'm gonna throw up. - This is what you're gonna do. 182 00:08:00,978 --> 00:08:03,044 You're gonna get in that car, put on your seat belt, 183 00:08:03,169 --> 00:08:05,220 take three deep breaths and relax. 184 00:08:05,345 --> 00:08:08,534 He sees hundreds of kids every day. He probably doesn't even remember you. 185 00:08:10,932 --> 00:08:12,416 Let's move it, two strikes. 186 00:08:15,924 --> 00:08:17,593 That's more than three breaths, honey. 187 00:08:20,331 --> 00:08:22,233 See how much better this is? 188 00:08:22,499 --> 00:08:25,791 The truck goes in, it gets video, we get a preview of whatever's in there. 189 00:08:25,916 --> 00:08:27,112 How ingenious is that? 190 00:08:27,280 --> 00:08:29,182 Are you too scared to go in? 191 00:08:30,294 --> 00:08:31,910 Why would you say that? 192 00:08:32,035 --> 00:08:34,537 When you stuck your head in, you screamed a little. 193 00:08:34,662 --> 00:08:36,380 I told you, that was the house settling. 194 00:08:36,706 --> 00:08:38,542 Besides, this is so much cooler. 195 00:08:38,667 --> 00:08:40,353 This is how NASA does it. 196 00:08:40,634 --> 00:08:42,992 Now, hand me the itty bitty booklight. 197 00:08:44,737 --> 00:08:47,058 Final piece of the puzzle. 198 00:08:49,628 --> 00:08:50,767 Blast off! 199 00:08:55,273 --> 00:08:56,552 - Hey, dad? - Yeah? 200 00:08:56,677 --> 00:08:59,457 How are you supposed to steer if you don't know where you're going? 201 00:08:59,582 --> 00:09:00,919 Stay in the present, buddy. 202 00:09:01,421 --> 00:09:02,973 Got to do it by feel. 203 00:09:04,041 --> 00:09:05,982 You got to get all Jedi on it. 204 00:09:18,424 --> 00:09:20,135 Did you just lose my truck? 205 00:09:20,303 --> 00:09:22,639 - You just lost my truck! - I didn't! 206 00:09:22,808 --> 00:09:25,186 - Grandpa just gave it to me! - I told you, stay in the present! 207 00:09:25,354 --> 00:09:26,505 Stop yelling! 208 00:09:30,199 --> 00:09:31,032 Truce? 209 00:09:31,200 --> 00:09:32,301 Yeah, sorry. 210 00:09:36,411 --> 00:09:37,813 This is delicious. 211 00:09:38,005 --> 00:09:41,108 The recipe's from the now-defunct Gourmet Magazine. 212 00:09:41,233 --> 00:09:43,069 Why do all the things I love go away? 213 00:09:44,559 --> 00:09:46,458 Look, I don't even think 214 00:09:46,815 --> 00:09:48,541 she said the "m" word. 215 00:09:48,902 --> 00:09:50,403 No, we heard it. Clear as day. 216 00:09:50,571 --> 00:09:52,990 I just don't know what we've done wrong. 217 00:09:53,202 --> 00:09:56,105 I quit my job so I could stay at home with her, 218 00:09:56,230 --> 00:09:57,899 but maybe it's not enough. 219 00:09:58,459 --> 00:10:00,348 Maybe we're not providing her 220 00:10:00,473 --> 00:10:03,109 with the feminine energy that she needs. 221 00:10:05,367 --> 00:10:07,870 I wouldn't be too concerned about that. 222 00:10:08,775 --> 00:10:10,903 You know it's because you're asian, right? 223 00:10:11,338 --> 00:10:14,034 No, I'm sorry. What, am I just supposed to ignore 224 00:10:14,426 --> 00:10:16,328 the giant panda in the room? 225 00:10:17,204 --> 00:10:19,550 Pandas are from China. I... well, it doesn't matter. 226 00:10:20,808 --> 00:10:24,304 I think what my hysterical partner is just trying to say, and if I may... 227 00:10:24,472 --> 00:10:26,771 That for the first six months of her life, 228 00:10:26,896 --> 00:10:29,314 Lily was raised by very loving Asian women 229 00:10:29,482 --> 00:10:32,260 in an orphanage, with whom she clearly bonded. 230 00:10:32,865 --> 00:10:35,280 And then suddenly you come in with all of your... 231 00:10:35,941 --> 00:10:39,084 Asian-ness... and breasts and womb, 232 00:10:39,396 --> 00:10:42,617 lady bits. And it all just comes rushing back to her... 233 00:10:43,404 --> 00:10:45,597 You guys are overreacting. 234 00:10:46,429 --> 00:10:49,188 I'm sure Lily just strung a couple of random 235 00:10:49,356 --> 00:10:51,567 syllables together and they happened to sound 236 00:10:51,735 --> 00:10:54,343 something like that word, but that's all. 237 00:10:57,362 --> 00:10:58,664 Do you really think that? 238 00:10:58,833 --> 00:10:59,834 Of course! 239 00:11:00,211 --> 00:11:01,880 - Right. - We're being ridiculous. 240 00:11:02,048 --> 00:11:03,257 We're being ridiculous. 241 00:11:03,565 --> 00:11:05,767 Your daddies are being ridiculous. 242 00:11:06,327 --> 00:11:07,328 Mommy! 243 00:11:10,905 --> 00:11:11,956 Mr. Tucker? 244 00:11:12,277 --> 00:11:14,152 She's... She's made her choice. 245 00:11:14,277 --> 00:11:15,573 She's made her choice. 246 00:11:16,149 --> 00:11:17,843 - Left turn. - Here? 247 00:11:18,491 --> 00:11:20,293 At the intersection, yeah. 248 00:11:21,784 --> 00:11:22,598 Left. 249 00:11:23,011 --> 00:11:23,812 What? 250 00:11:24,161 --> 00:11:28,099 - I said, "left." You're going right. - Wait! No, wait! I'm trying, okay? 251 00:11:28,267 --> 00:11:30,144 - Pull over. - No, I can do this! 252 00:11:30,313 --> 00:11:31,522 Pull over now! 253 00:11:33,922 --> 00:11:35,238 Why are you crying? 254 00:11:35,406 --> 00:11:36,673 Why do you hate me? 255 00:11:36,799 --> 00:11:37,812 Oh, hell. 256 00:11:38,913 --> 00:11:40,081 I don't hate you. 257 00:11:40,249 --> 00:11:43,212 You seem like a nice girl. You remind me of my daughter, 258 00:11:43,380 --> 00:11:45,952 which is why I want you to live a long and happy life 259 00:11:46,077 --> 00:11:47,178 and be safe. 260 00:11:47,828 --> 00:11:49,579 And not hurt my daughter. 261 00:11:51,215 --> 00:11:52,699 I really want my license. 262 00:11:52,825 --> 00:11:55,182 I've been practicing a lot, I swear. 263 00:11:55,571 --> 00:11:57,324 - You gonna drink and drive? - No, sir. 264 00:11:57,492 --> 00:11:59,684 - You gonna text and drive? - No, sir. 265 00:12:00,341 --> 00:12:01,342 All right. 266 00:12:01,878 --> 00:12:04,180 Let's start this from the beginning. 267 00:12:04,937 --> 00:12:07,062 Could you smile first? 268 00:12:08,034 --> 00:12:10,016 I'll be less nervous if you smile. 269 00:12:15,763 --> 00:12:17,400 Okay, that didn't help. 270 00:12:18,093 --> 00:12:18,994 Just go. 271 00:12:23,469 --> 00:12:25,863 Today feels like a good day for halibut. 272 00:12:26,193 --> 00:12:30,053 Jay, did I tell you about the time I used peanut butter and jelly for bait 273 00:12:30,178 --> 00:12:34,070 - and I caught a thresher shark? - You tell me a lot of funny things. 274 00:12:34,733 --> 00:12:36,334 Why are we going this way? 275 00:12:36,459 --> 00:12:38,021 It's just another way to go. 276 00:12:38,447 --> 00:12:40,034 Uh-oh. Something's going on. 277 00:12:40,613 --> 00:12:42,790 - What are you talking about? - Wake up, old man. 278 00:12:42,958 --> 00:12:44,794 She wants me to go on the roller coaster. 279 00:12:47,046 --> 00:12:48,142 No, she's not. 280 00:12:48,267 --> 00:12:49,428 - Yes, I am. - What? 281 00:12:49,728 --> 00:12:52,385 - Told you. - Manny, you have to face your fears. 282 00:12:52,510 --> 00:12:54,118 That's why we're here? 283 00:12:54,243 --> 00:12:56,442 Why didn't you let me in on your little plan? 284 00:12:56,610 --> 00:12:59,160 You're the worst liar. He would have seen right through you. 285 00:12:59,285 --> 00:13:02,955 - I don't wanna go on this. - You were afraid to light the barbecue, 286 00:13:03,474 --> 00:13:05,830 but now your eyebrows have grown back 287 00:13:05,955 --> 00:13:07,920 and your salmon is legendary. 288 00:13:08,600 --> 00:13:10,511 - What if I fall out? - I will catch you. 289 00:13:10,679 --> 00:13:12,265 Impossible. He would crush you. 290 00:13:12,999 --> 00:13:14,220 What if I throw up? 291 00:13:14,345 --> 00:13:16,602 I will clean it up. It wouldn't be the first time. 292 00:13:16,727 --> 00:13:18,069 Geez. These are new shoes. 293 00:13:19,531 --> 00:13:21,355 You're not gonna let up, are you? 294 00:13:21,480 --> 00:13:23,682 Baby, I think you know the answer. 295 00:13:26,016 --> 00:13:27,968 Fine, let's get it over with. 296 00:13:28,421 --> 00:13:30,385 That's my boy! Vamos, Jay. 297 00:13:30,553 --> 00:13:33,182 No, I'm not going on that. That's bad for my back. 298 00:13:33,772 --> 00:13:36,146 - Your back is fine. - Yeah, I got an inner-ear thing. 299 00:13:36,768 --> 00:13:38,494 Don't tell me you're scared, too. 300 00:13:38,619 --> 00:13:40,692 Scared? What is this scared stuff? 301 00:13:40,818 --> 00:13:43,072 What am I, a child? I'm not scared. 302 00:13:43,197 --> 00:13:45,111 You see? You're the worst liar. 303 00:13:45,236 --> 00:13:47,819 Well, if he's not going, I'm not going. 304 00:13:47,944 --> 00:13:50,299 Oh, for God's sake, fine. I'll go alone. 305 00:13:50,578 --> 00:13:52,880 Here, take my girly purse. 306 00:13:53,005 --> 00:13:54,822 And you, my floppy hat. 307 00:13:54,947 --> 00:13:57,021 And if you need it, there's the ladies' room. 308 00:14:00,109 --> 00:14:02,261 I'm not man enough to fight this. 309 00:14:04,126 --> 00:14:05,627 Here, hold my purse. 310 00:14:09,789 --> 00:14:10,739 Oh, hell! 311 00:14:14,017 --> 00:14:16,114 - What's taking them so long? - I don't know. 312 00:14:16,239 --> 00:14:19,295 The only reason I'm not panicking is I haven't seen a giant geyser. 313 00:14:20,458 --> 00:14:22,907 Honey, I think I know why you don't wanna go tonight. 314 00:14:23,075 --> 00:14:24,650 Because school dances are lame? 315 00:14:24,776 --> 00:14:27,415 - No. You don't know how to dance. - That's not it. 316 00:14:27,583 --> 00:14:30,191 - I can help you with that. Come on. - Oh, God. No, Mom! 317 00:14:30,316 --> 00:14:32,809 Yeah, back in the day, I was quite the dancer. 318 00:14:32,934 --> 00:14:35,661 Oh, my God, you and Dad together suddenly makes so much sense. 319 00:14:35,787 --> 00:14:37,727 Mom! Mom, stop! Stop! 320 00:14:38,166 --> 00:14:40,368 Please, stop. I know how to dance. 321 00:14:40,902 --> 00:14:43,113 I just don't want to be part of that freak show. 322 00:14:43,695 --> 00:14:46,871 Sweetheart, you're a beautiful girl. Someone will ask you to dance. 323 00:14:47,039 --> 00:14:48,875 I know that. It's just stupid. 324 00:14:49,329 --> 00:14:51,840 - Somebody will ask you. - Why do you keep saying that? 325 00:14:52,155 --> 00:14:53,551 Somebody will ask you. 326 00:14:54,953 --> 00:14:56,495 But what if they don't? 327 00:14:56,620 --> 00:14:58,514 Honey, if they don't, 328 00:14:58,813 --> 00:15:01,967 then you do the exact same thing I told your sister, okay? 329 00:15:02,092 --> 00:15:04,531 Take three deep breaths and relax. 330 00:15:04,699 --> 00:15:06,660 Even the advice I get is a hand-me-down. 331 00:15:07,125 --> 00:15:08,522 Mom, I did it! 332 00:15:08,832 --> 00:15:09,792 I passed! 333 00:15:10,121 --> 00:15:12,538 - Oh, my God! - I got my license! 334 00:15:12,663 --> 00:15:15,778 - I have my license! I got my license! - Haley, car's not in park. 335 00:15:15,903 --> 00:15:16,848 Oh, oops. 336 00:15:18,185 --> 00:15:20,104 You better run to that counter. Run! 337 00:15:25,108 --> 00:15:28,370 - I can't believe you lost my truck. - It's gone, buddy. Let it go. 338 00:15:29,079 --> 00:15:32,378 You know, maybe it's better We don't solve this little mystery. 339 00:15:32,503 --> 00:15:35,846 Sometimes treasure's more sparkly in your imagination, 340 00:15:35,971 --> 00:15:39,517 where it could be gold or baseball cards or pirate maps. 341 00:15:40,413 --> 00:15:43,025 Do you really think there could be pirate maps? 342 00:15:43,193 --> 00:15:45,323 I'm 100% sure it's possible. 343 00:15:45,652 --> 00:15:46,653 All right. 344 00:15:46,779 --> 00:15:47,930 I'm going in. 345 00:15:48,343 --> 00:15:49,155 What? 346 00:15:53,714 --> 00:15:55,141 Really? Buddy? 347 00:15:59,960 --> 00:16:03,137 - What do you see? - Nothing. It's really dark in here. 348 00:16:03,262 --> 00:16:05,736 Wait a minute. I think I see my truck. 349 00:16:05,905 --> 00:16:08,095 It's right over there by the... Uh-oh. 350 00:16:08,220 --> 00:16:09,039 What? 351 00:16:09,164 --> 00:16:11,869 - I think I'm stuck. - How are you stuck? 352 00:16:12,108 --> 00:16:14,865 My belt loop got caught on a pipe, and it's hot! 353 00:16:15,279 --> 00:16:18,858 - Have you tried wiggling? - Dad! It's hot! Hurry! 354 00:16:18,983 --> 00:16:22,336 - I'm coming, buddy! - Hurry! There are spiders in here! 355 00:16:24,994 --> 00:16:25,951 Coming! 356 00:16:26,654 --> 00:16:28,726 Sorry if we got all weird in there. 357 00:16:29,050 --> 00:16:30,197 It was fine. 358 00:16:30,322 --> 00:16:33,329 Well, we'd like to say it's different than how it usually is, but... 359 00:16:33,454 --> 00:16:35,798 you've seen us enough to know that that's not true. 360 00:16:35,923 --> 00:16:39,310 Guys, listen. I had a very complicated relationship with my mother. 361 00:16:39,435 --> 00:16:40,946 She was born in Japan, 362 00:16:41,071 --> 00:16:42,601 crazy-traditional. 363 00:16:42,904 --> 00:16:46,330 She didn't want me to become a doctor, but to get married and have kids. But... 364 00:16:46,455 --> 00:16:47,556 My father... 365 00:16:48,190 --> 00:16:51,336 We would talk, and he would actually listen to what I wanted. 366 00:16:51,804 --> 00:16:54,006 Anyway, what I'm trying to say is, 367 00:16:54,473 --> 00:16:57,173 having a mother isn't always what it's cracked up to be. 368 00:16:59,738 --> 00:17:01,323 And if you ask me, 369 00:17:01,932 --> 00:17:04,578 having two fathers who care as much as you do 370 00:17:04,703 --> 00:17:06,901 makes Lily the luckiest little girl in the world. 371 00:17:07,069 --> 00:17:09,900 - Oh, thank you so much. - Thank you for that. That's very sweet. 372 00:17:10,025 --> 00:17:10,843 Thanks. 373 00:17:11,172 --> 00:17:13,538 And how are things with you and your mom now? 374 00:17:15,511 --> 00:17:18,298 The only way she'll be happy is if I'm some Asian stereotype, 375 00:17:18,958 --> 00:17:20,819 but that just isn't me. 376 00:17:25,982 --> 00:17:27,441 I didn't see those! 377 00:17:32,661 --> 00:17:34,063 I'm coming, buddy! 378 00:17:34,240 --> 00:17:36,935 - Over here. - That's a spider web. 379 00:17:37,060 --> 00:17:38,359 Oh, God. 380 00:17:38,687 --> 00:17:40,753 My boy was in trouble, so... 381 00:17:40,879 --> 00:17:43,523 I put my fears aside, and I came to his rescue. 382 00:17:43,648 --> 00:17:45,878 Now, does that make me a hero? 383 00:17:46,258 --> 00:17:47,523 Yes, it does. 384 00:17:47,691 --> 00:17:49,424 Everything's gonna be okay. 385 00:17:49,549 --> 00:17:51,651 Hey, everything's gonna be okay. 386 00:17:53,503 --> 00:17:54,384 There! 387 00:17:55,278 --> 00:17:57,441 - Thanks, Dad. - Hey, just what dads do. 388 00:17:57,711 --> 00:17:59,638 - Let's get out of here. - I want my truck. 389 00:17:59,763 --> 00:18:00,729 Really? 390 00:18:01,354 --> 00:18:03,079 It was a Christmas gift! 391 00:18:03,311 --> 00:18:04,813 Could you go get it? 392 00:18:08,874 --> 00:18:09,975 Sure. Scoot. 393 00:18:10,468 --> 00:18:11,669 Scoot through. 394 00:18:16,064 --> 00:18:17,165 There it is. 395 00:18:21,595 --> 00:18:22,415 Got it. 396 00:18:22,662 --> 00:18:24,071 - You okay? - Yeah. 397 00:18:24,423 --> 00:18:25,555 Are you okay? 398 00:18:26,255 --> 00:18:27,456 You know what? 399 00:18:27,639 --> 00:18:28,728 I am okay. 400 00:18:30,584 --> 00:18:32,738 - We did it! - Whoo-hoo! 401 00:18:32,907 --> 00:18:35,059 - We're under the house! - Yeah! 402 00:18:36,028 --> 00:18:37,351 What the heck? 403 00:18:37,476 --> 00:18:38,778 We're down here. 404 00:18:39,050 --> 00:18:41,002 Why don't we see what we got? 405 00:18:42,429 --> 00:18:43,267 Two... 406 00:18:43,747 --> 00:18:45,263 intrepid explorers... 407 00:18:46,002 --> 00:18:48,004 make their way on a journey... 408 00:18:49,528 --> 00:18:50,870 Dead bodies! 409 00:18:51,307 --> 00:18:54,156 We called the police and got a bunch of detectives over. 410 00:18:54,556 --> 00:18:57,685 Turns out it was the last owner's Halloween decorations, 411 00:18:57,811 --> 00:18:59,412 which is pretty funny. 412 00:18:59,708 --> 00:19:01,560 At least, I thought it was. 413 00:19:02,601 --> 00:19:04,867 Everybody's afraid of something, right? 414 00:19:05,509 --> 00:19:08,560 Heights, clowns, tight spaces. 415 00:19:08,974 --> 00:19:10,375 You like it, Jay? 416 00:19:12,708 --> 00:19:13,698 I did it! 417 00:19:14,511 --> 00:19:16,242 Those are things you get over, but... 418 00:19:16,946 --> 00:19:18,594 then there's our children. 419 00:19:19,614 --> 00:19:20,966 Will they fit in? 420 00:19:25,659 --> 00:19:27,061 Will they be safe? 421 00:19:28,452 --> 00:19:30,538 Those are fears you never get past. 422 00:19:31,649 --> 00:19:32,784 Sometimes, 423 00:19:32,909 --> 00:19:34,194 all you can do is... 424 00:19:34,747 --> 00:19:36,199 take a deep breath, 425 00:19:36,514 --> 00:19:39,017 pull them close, and hope for the best. 426 00:19:41,003 --> 00:19:42,461 - Eyes on the road! - Love you! 427 00:19:42,629 --> 00:19:43,880 Eyes on the road! 428 00:19:44,005 --> 00:19:45,050 Oh, God! 429 00:19:45,799 --> 00:19:48,201 I mean, things don't always work out. 430 00:19:49,699 --> 00:19:52,256 - I think she wants her doll. - I don't know where it is. 431 00:19:52,381 --> 00:19:53,382 Mommy. 432 00:19:56,486 --> 00:19:57,695 Mommy. 433 00:19:59,131 --> 00:20:00,413 Mommy. 434 00:20:01,250 --> 00:20:03,494 When you squeeze the doll, it says, "mommy." 435 00:20:03,619 --> 00:20:05,257 - Did you know... - No clue. 436 00:20:06,527 --> 00:20:10,100 - The doll says, "mommy." - The doll says, "mommy." 437 00:20:11,359 --> 00:20:14,030 But you got to love it when they do. 438 00:20:18,584 --> 00:20:21,015 Mom says there's an old trunk in the attic. 439 00:20:21,140 --> 00:20:22,876 My grandpa's old steamer trunk. 440 00:20:23,067 --> 00:20:25,876 In this movie I saw, there was this old trunk, 441 00:20:26,001 --> 00:20:29,054 and there was a secret compartment, and when you opened it, 442 00:20:29,179 --> 00:20:32,342 there was a whole bunch of paintings by the world's greatest painters, 443 00:20:32,467 --> 00:20:35,495 - hidden in the war. - My grandpa was in the war. 444 00:20:36,719 --> 00:20:39,136 - Should we go up there? - Totally. It could be diamonds. 445 00:20:39,391 --> 00:20:42,895 - Or a samurai sword. - Or the declaration of independence. 446 00:20:43,690 --> 00:20:46,321 You know, it almost doesn't even matter what's up there. 447 00:20:47,995 --> 00:20:50,624 What matters is what you do with the money from what's up there. 448 00:20:51,157 --> 00:20:54,332 - We could get a motorboat. - Or a robotic gutter cleaner. 449 00:20:54,457 --> 00:20:57,188 - Or an indoor pool. - Or a two-man submarine.