1 00:00:06,135 --> 00:00:08,589 Honey, Ibiza can only take us at 6:30 tonight. 2 00:00:08,714 --> 00:00:11,135 Great. I will meet you at Ibiza. 3 00:00:11,604 --> 00:00:13,815 It's pronounced "Ibeetha," not "Ibeeza. " 4 00:00:13,984 --> 00:00:15,700 Thanks, honey. That reminds me 5 00:00:15,825 --> 00:00:18,595 this weekend, I want to see that baby panda at the "thoo." 6 00:00:20,686 --> 00:00:21,888 I'm the idiot. 7 00:00:22,334 --> 00:00:24,385 This year for Valentine's Day, we're gonna have 8 00:00:24,510 --> 00:00:27,341 a nice, quiet dinner at Ibiza. Last year, we... 9 00:00:28,074 --> 00:00:29,833 We overreached a little. 10 00:00:30,120 --> 00:00:32,895 We created sexy alter egos, Clive and Juliana, 11 00:00:33,063 --> 00:00:36,530 and met in the hotel bar. This one lost her panties in the lobby 12 00:00:36,655 --> 00:00:38,441 in front of her dad which was hil... 13 00:00:38,566 --> 00:00:40,585 It was hard. It was hard for her. 14 00:00:40,961 --> 00:00:42,789 I can't stand it when you use that word. 15 00:00:42,959 --> 00:00:45,693 - "Panties"? - Yeah, that... Yes, that word. 16 00:00:45,818 --> 00:00:46,819 Sorry. 17 00:00:46,945 --> 00:00:48,746 She lost her underpanties. 18 00:00:52,227 --> 00:00:53,603 So? 19 00:00:54,024 --> 00:00:56,150 - So? - Well? 20 00:00:56,610 --> 00:00:57,611 So? 21 00:00:57,779 --> 00:01:00,450 - What's happening? - Flowers? 22 00:01:00,618 --> 00:01:02,662 Is someone pointing a gun at you? 23 00:01:02,831 --> 00:01:04,833 Did you get the flowers Lily and I sent you? 24 00:01:05,434 --> 00:01:08,140 That's so sweet. No. No, I didn't get anything. 25 00:01:08,265 --> 00:01:09,266 Really? 26 00:01:09,857 --> 00:01:12,012 Did you check with that assistant of yours? 27 00:01:16,562 --> 00:01:18,110 Did you get any flowers today? 28 00:01:18,279 --> 00:01:20,406 No. Sadly, I'm without Valentine this year. 29 00:01:20,575 --> 00:01:22,202 No, for Mitchell! The flowers are 30 00:01:22,370 --> 00:01:23,537 for Mitchell! 31 00:01:23,706 --> 00:01:24,856 That's right. 32 00:01:26,462 --> 00:01:27,837 Mitchell's assistant has 33 00:01:28,007 --> 00:01:30,081 - a huge crush on him. - He does not. 34 00:01:30,206 --> 00:01:32,830 And I think the only prudent thing to do is say, "you're fired." 35 00:01:32,956 --> 00:01:35,762 Don't be jealous. He just looks up to me. 36 00:01:36,021 --> 00:01:38,289 The thing about Mitchell is he can be naive. 37 00:01:38,414 --> 00:01:42,033 He is completely unaware of how absolutely adorable he is. 38 00:01:42,636 --> 00:01:45,717 Thank you. But I am aware when someone has a crush on me, 39 00:01:45,842 --> 00:01:48,391 and he does not have a crush on me. 40 00:01:49,001 --> 00:01:50,552 He has a crush on me. 41 00:01:51,294 --> 00:01:53,703 Subtitles by MiniBen314 & Kevin 42 00:01:53,828 --> 00:01:55,894 www.seriessub.com www.sous-titres.eu 43 00:02:03,970 --> 00:02:06,832 I was concerned when they said they could only take us at 6:30, but... 44 00:02:07,001 --> 00:02:09,403 I know. This house is on fire, right? 45 00:02:10,376 --> 00:02:13,429 - Now, this is how you do V-Day. - Except most of these people 46 00:02:13,597 --> 00:02:15,699 could have been here on VE-Day. 47 00:02:16,311 --> 00:02:18,513 But it's classy, which we deserve. 48 00:02:18,833 --> 00:02:19,985 Yes, we do. 49 00:02:20,110 --> 00:02:23,199 What were we thinking last year, acting like a couple of teenagers? 50 00:02:23,367 --> 00:02:24,409 I know. 51 00:02:25,300 --> 00:02:28,701 We've had our crazy Valentine's Days. We tore it up! 52 00:02:29,081 --> 00:02:31,840 But you got to know when to let that stuff go. 53 00:02:32,010 --> 00:02:35,056 All those kids out there are looking for something we've already got. 54 00:02:36,431 --> 00:02:38,339 - I love you. - I love you, too. 55 00:02:41,501 --> 00:02:43,322 - Are you okay? - I'm good. We're good. 56 00:02:43,491 --> 00:02:45,449 - You alright? - My first day in this thing. 57 00:02:45,574 --> 00:02:47,076 Let me help you out. 58 00:02:47,540 --> 00:02:49,919 - I park it over there for you? - Thank you. 59 00:02:50,044 --> 00:02:51,513 Here's your valet ticket. 60 00:02:51,638 --> 00:02:53,665 I'm kidding, actually. That's my valet ticket. 61 00:02:55,571 --> 00:02:56,572 All right. 62 00:02:56,939 --> 00:02:57,940 Let's see. 63 00:02:58,065 --> 00:03:00,102 Lefty loosey, righty tighty. 64 00:03:01,591 --> 00:03:02,592 All right. 65 00:03:04,410 --> 00:03:07,013 This is fun, Claire. You got to try this. 66 00:03:08,290 --> 00:03:09,749 - He's a natural. - Thank you. 67 00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:15,471 I know Phil and I are gonna grow old together someday... 68 00:03:15,596 --> 00:03:17,140 This thing needs mirrors. 69 00:03:17,589 --> 00:03:19,981 But today is not that day. 70 00:03:30,754 --> 00:03:32,170 May I speak to Clive? 71 00:03:32,338 --> 00:03:34,967 I'm sorry. I think you have the wrong number. Bye-bye. 72 00:03:36,374 --> 00:03:38,934 I got disconnected. Would you mind redialing? 73 00:03:45,960 --> 00:03:48,369 Hello, Clive. This is Juliana. 74 00:03:48,537 --> 00:03:51,291 Look lady, please stop calling me. This is... 75 00:03:51,460 --> 00:03:52,669 Phil, don't hang up. 76 00:03:54,092 --> 00:03:55,132 Not Claire. 77 00:03:55,616 --> 00:03:56,970 Juliana. 78 00:03:57,578 --> 00:04:01,311 And you're Clive Bixby, remember? We met at the hotel bar last year. 79 00:04:05,989 --> 00:04:06,990 Now... 80 00:04:07,158 --> 00:04:09,885 Make up some lie, ditch that wife of yours, 81 00:04:10,010 --> 00:04:13,127 and meet me at our hotel in 30 minutes. You think you can you manage that? 82 00:04:13,295 --> 00:04:16,523 Baby doll, I've been lying to my wife for 16 years. 83 00:04:18,221 --> 00:04:19,222 See ya. 84 00:04:23,042 --> 00:04:24,774 So... Champagne? 85 00:04:25,754 --> 00:04:27,822 Actually, Claire, something's come up, so... 86 00:04:28,666 --> 00:04:29,695 Gotta go. 87 00:04:29,820 --> 00:04:31,747 You're not ditching me here on Valentine's Day. 88 00:04:31,916 --> 00:04:33,817 - Screw that. Sit. - But... 89 00:04:37,257 --> 00:04:38,308 We'll stay. 90 00:04:40,017 --> 00:04:41,433 That's part of it? 91 00:04:41,601 --> 00:04:42,602 So hot! 92 00:04:43,311 --> 00:04:44,773 I'm leaving. Deal with it. 93 00:04:47,759 --> 00:04:49,511 So, no one walks anymore! 94 00:04:53,693 --> 00:04:56,793 - Should be just few more minutes. - When is our reservation? 95 00:04:56,919 --> 00:04:58,300 Here's the thing. 96 00:04:58,469 --> 00:05:00,763 - Not "the thing." I hate "the thing." - My secretary 97 00:05:00,932 --> 00:05:04,229 screwed up and didn't get us one. Don't worry. I'll slip the guy a few bucks. 98 00:05:04,631 --> 00:05:07,885 What kind of idiot messes up two Valentine's in a row? 99 00:05:08,367 --> 00:05:09,618 Not this idiot. 100 00:05:09,743 --> 00:05:12,697 Two months ago, I booked a private chef, musicians, the works... 101 00:05:12,822 --> 00:05:14,824 for a romantic dinner at home. 102 00:05:15,202 --> 00:05:16,353 I just had to 103 00:05:16,791 --> 00:05:19,945 get the señorita out of the house while they set up. 104 00:05:20,679 --> 00:05:22,765 This is 50 bucks. Do not give us a table. 105 00:05:22,935 --> 00:05:24,310 What's the money for? 106 00:05:24,479 --> 00:05:27,442 You also must refuse my wife. She's very persuasive. 107 00:05:28,779 --> 00:05:29,989 A couple more minutes. 108 00:05:30,157 --> 00:05:33,059 So we don't get the table at the fancy restaurant, 109 00:05:33,184 --> 00:05:34,595 which drives Gloria crazy. 110 00:05:34,720 --> 00:05:37,956 "Jay, why you not be no more romantic to me?" 111 00:05:38,597 --> 00:05:40,549 We walk in the door, and bam! 112 00:05:41,157 --> 00:05:43,009 She looks like a big idiot. 113 00:05:45,195 --> 00:05:48,198 And isn't that what Valentine's Day is all about? 114 00:05:49,385 --> 00:05:50,779 Jay, come here. We're in. 115 00:05:51,894 --> 00:05:55,147 Your secretary didn't forget, look. Pritchett for two. 116 00:06:02,165 --> 00:06:04,874 Just a reminder. I need the television at 8:00. 117 00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:08,253 Jeremy and I have a phone date to watch Love Actually. 118 00:06:09,052 --> 00:06:12,031 That's the lamest plan ever, and I'm jealous. 119 00:06:12,200 --> 00:06:15,726 So, my boyfriend, David, blows me off on the most romantic night of the year 120 00:06:15,851 --> 00:06:16,852 to study! 121 00:06:16,978 --> 00:06:18,627 This is the worst Valentine's Day. 122 00:06:18,795 --> 00:06:20,734 Best Valentine's Day ever! 123 00:06:20,979 --> 00:06:22,420 David stands up Haley, 124 00:06:22,545 --> 00:06:24,974 and old boyfriend Dylan is out of the picture. 125 00:06:25,142 --> 00:06:28,595 I'm not saying I miss Dylan, but at least he was romantic. 126 00:06:28,720 --> 00:06:31,319 David never sent me a jar of his own tears. 127 00:06:31,488 --> 00:06:33,194 I'm playing the long game here. 128 00:06:33,319 --> 00:06:35,421 Like me today, love me tomorrow. 129 00:06:35,546 --> 00:06:38,649 She's had the romantic. She's had the intellectual. 130 00:06:38,774 --> 00:06:41,966 How about all of that in one fine, little brown package? 131 00:06:42,738 --> 00:06:44,930 - I've hit a new low. - You can talk to me. 132 00:06:45,679 --> 00:06:46,867 And I'm lower. 133 00:06:46,993 --> 00:06:50,421 Just picking up some things. I am not here. 134 00:06:50,546 --> 00:06:52,984 Name tags, name tags, name tags. 135 00:06:53,570 --> 00:06:55,052 Come on! Bingo! 136 00:06:57,719 --> 00:06:59,121 I know what to do. 137 00:06:59,246 --> 00:07:02,188 Dylan's been texting me again. I bet if David knew that, 138 00:07:02,313 --> 00:07:04,469 - he'd come running right over here. - Wait. 139 00:07:04,637 --> 00:07:06,417 Before you start playing these games, 140 00:07:06,542 --> 00:07:08,700 let me ask you one simple question... 141 00:07:09,230 --> 00:07:10,606 Who is Haley Dunphy? 142 00:07:21,106 --> 00:07:23,431 - Don't do it, Haley! - Stop following me. 143 00:07:23,556 --> 00:07:25,308 Let me just say my piece. 144 00:07:29,410 --> 00:07:30,411 Look, 145 00:07:30,882 --> 00:07:33,883 you can be the Haley who defines herself as David's girlfriend, 146 00:07:34,008 --> 00:07:37,161 or Dylan's girlfriend, or you can be your own Haley. 147 00:07:37,286 --> 00:07:39,939 Maybe you haven't met her, but I know her. 148 00:07:40,064 --> 00:07:42,882 She's an amazing person. So when you're ready, 149 00:07:43,007 --> 00:07:44,808 I'd like to introduce you. 150 00:07:57,065 --> 00:07:58,791 Is there something I can do you for? 151 00:07:58,917 --> 00:08:01,959 I just came by to pick up my man. I'm taking him to Ibiza tonight. 152 00:08:02,514 --> 00:08:05,716 I've heard good things about Ibiza. But he may have to meet you there. 153 00:08:05,885 --> 00:08:08,305 - He's in the middle of a meeting. - On Valentine's night? 154 00:08:08,473 --> 00:08:10,476 I didn't realize scheduling it. It's my fault. 155 00:08:10,644 --> 00:08:12,235 Gasp. I'm shocked. 156 00:08:12,690 --> 00:08:15,504 I could drop him off at the restaurant as soon as they wrap it up. 157 00:08:15,629 --> 00:08:17,031 Aren't you a dear? 158 00:08:17,433 --> 00:08:20,456 I'd like to mount your head in my trophy room. 159 00:08:23,586 --> 00:08:24,587 Wait. 160 00:08:26,843 --> 00:08:28,592 Have I upset you in any way? 161 00:08:28,717 --> 00:08:32,421 Please, let's not play this game. We both know what's going on. 162 00:08:33,729 --> 00:08:35,481 Have I been that obvious? 163 00:08:35,934 --> 00:08:39,200 The flowers that don't get delivered, the Valentine's Day plans interrupted... 164 00:08:39,368 --> 00:08:43,022 Do I really need to spell it out for you? Me, Mitchell, wedge. 165 00:08:45,050 --> 00:08:46,251 Don't hate me. 166 00:08:47,426 --> 00:08:48,775 It's just so hard 167 00:08:48,901 --> 00:08:52,404 to see someone else have something you want and can't have. 168 00:08:53,053 --> 00:08:54,955 Does Broderick have a crush? 169 00:08:56,044 --> 00:08:58,477 On someone he frequently sees at the office? 170 00:09:01,964 --> 00:09:03,790 Does that man have red hair and a beard? 171 00:09:04,176 --> 00:09:06,028 No, but his boyfriend does. 172 00:09:07,643 --> 00:09:09,468 It's me. The crush is on me. 173 00:09:12,148 --> 00:09:13,249 This is you. 174 00:09:15,322 --> 00:09:16,773 Did I validate you? 175 00:09:43,841 --> 00:09:46,167 - Appletini? - It was. 176 00:09:49,110 --> 00:09:50,927 You're looking handsome as ever, Clive. 177 00:09:51,365 --> 00:09:52,866 As are you, Juliana. 178 00:09:52,992 --> 00:09:55,560 You look hot enough to cook a pizza on. 179 00:09:56,313 --> 00:09:57,314 In. 180 00:09:57,686 --> 00:09:59,819 I see the speaker business is treating you well. 181 00:10:00,340 --> 00:10:04,245 I don't like to talk about money... But I have exactly $10 million... 182 00:10:05,141 --> 00:10:07,084 Minus the cost of your next drink. 183 00:10:08,348 --> 00:10:10,317 Two. Just two appletinis, please. 184 00:10:10,442 --> 00:10:11,843 Thank you so much. 185 00:10:14,642 --> 00:10:17,939 Why do I get the feeling you're not really a salesman? 186 00:10:18,650 --> 00:10:20,001 Pretty and smart. 187 00:10:20,126 --> 00:10:22,281 Or should I say "pretty smart"? 188 00:10:23,499 --> 00:10:24,660 I might do some 189 00:10:24,829 --> 00:10:27,166 high-risk work for Uncle Sam that takes me 190 00:10:27,334 --> 00:10:28,778 clear around the country. 191 00:10:29,559 --> 00:10:32,760 So you could say you're a national man of mystery. 192 00:10:34,724 --> 00:10:36,538 Never did catch what you do. 193 00:10:36,663 --> 00:10:38,730 - Didn't you? - Surprising, I know. 194 00:10:38,899 --> 00:10:42,001 I'm usually pretty good at catching things from women in bars. 195 00:10:44,090 --> 00:10:47,303 I am just a bored housewife with a dark side 196 00:10:47,740 --> 00:10:49,168 and an hour to kill. 197 00:10:50,105 --> 00:10:51,965 Is that what I think it is? 198 00:10:52,134 --> 00:10:53,684 It's not a gift card. 199 00:10:53,809 --> 00:10:56,057 Or maybe it is. 200 00:10:57,677 --> 00:10:59,396 I'll be upstairs, Clive. 201 00:10:59,926 --> 00:11:01,427 Don't take too long. 202 00:11:04,357 --> 00:11:05,575 I never do. 203 00:11:13,491 --> 00:11:14,492 Merci. 204 00:11:19,569 --> 00:11:21,942 - Jay, relax. - I'm sorry. The place is a dump. 205 00:11:22,110 --> 00:11:24,223 - It's beautiful. - Nothing good on the menu. 206 00:11:24,348 --> 00:11:26,618 See the hands on our waiter? He's been birthing hogs. 207 00:11:26,743 --> 00:11:29,129 - Let's just get out of here. - I don't know what's wrong 208 00:11:29,254 --> 00:11:32,087 with you tonight, but I'm hungry, I look fantastic, we're staying. 209 00:11:32,629 --> 00:11:34,008 Five-course dinner waiting 210 00:11:34,176 --> 00:11:36,986 at home, and she's strapping on the feed bag at Ibiza. 211 00:11:37,111 --> 00:11:39,310 But then an angel from heaven saved the night. 212 00:11:39,600 --> 00:11:42,975 You took our reservation! "Pritchett for two" is us. 213 00:11:43,100 --> 00:11:45,238 Come on, let's go! Move your bottom, come on... 214 00:11:45,407 --> 00:11:46,980 A big gay angel. 215 00:12:11,977 --> 00:12:15,048 - How close are you? - I am right outside your door. 216 00:12:16,954 --> 00:12:17,971 Are you ready? 217 00:12:18,139 --> 00:12:20,517 - I'm ready. - I don't think you are, 218 00:12:20,685 --> 00:12:22,604 because I can still hear your pants. 219 00:12:23,095 --> 00:12:25,597 Well, maybe I should just shut them up. 220 00:12:27,911 --> 00:12:29,953 - I'll be out in a minute. - So... 221 00:12:30,121 --> 00:12:31,122 Will... 222 00:12:31,747 --> 00:12:32,748 I... 223 00:13:06,245 --> 00:13:07,527 Where are you? 224 00:13:07,841 --> 00:13:09,593 You have to come find me. 225 00:13:18,499 --> 00:13:21,138 - I give up. Where are you? - I'm right here on the bed. 226 00:13:23,461 --> 00:13:25,647 - Phil, what room are you in? - Who's this "Phil"? 227 00:13:25,815 --> 00:13:29,238 - Seriously, what room are you in? - I'm in 702. 228 00:13:29,406 --> 00:13:31,292 - I'm in 226. - What? 229 00:13:32,678 --> 00:13:34,430 Whose room is this, then? 230 00:13:39,715 --> 00:13:41,617 There's been a tiny mistake. 231 00:13:45,065 --> 00:13:46,850 I need to apologize to you. 232 00:13:46,976 --> 00:13:49,904 I'm sorry I got so silly with all that Broderick stuff earlier. 233 00:13:50,073 --> 00:13:52,074 Please, do not worry about it. 234 00:13:52,510 --> 00:13:54,466 Cam, I like it when you get a little jealous. 235 00:13:54,591 --> 00:13:55,642 Cut it out. 236 00:13:56,105 --> 00:13:59,001 As long as we can agree... He does not have a crush on me. 237 00:13:59,126 --> 00:14:00,008 Absolutely. 238 00:14:00,670 --> 00:14:02,429 - So, to us. - To us. 239 00:14:03,023 --> 00:14:04,441 He does not have a crush on you. 240 00:14:08,355 --> 00:14:10,320 Why do I feel like you're hinting at something? 241 00:14:10,745 --> 00:14:13,534 We have talked long enough about Broderick's crush, 242 00:14:13,997 --> 00:14:15,371 which he does not have... 243 00:14:15,800 --> 00:14:16,801 on you. 244 00:14:17,377 --> 00:14:18,211 What? 245 00:14:18,379 --> 00:14:20,439 Okay, fine. Since you won't let it go... 246 00:14:20,564 --> 00:14:22,138 Your assistant is hot for me. 247 00:14:22,263 --> 00:14:24,264 That's why he's been playing the saboteur. 248 00:14:24,433 --> 00:14:26,810 And you're sure it's not because he wants me? 249 00:14:26,980 --> 00:14:28,899 - You said he didn't. - To protect your feelings. 250 00:14:29,067 --> 00:14:32,697 - He hugged me in the elevator. - Pick out china and move to Vermont. 251 00:14:32,867 --> 00:14:35,411 He said it kills him to see someone else have something he wants. 252 00:14:35,580 --> 00:14:37,666 You're the someone and I'm the something. 253 00:14:39,064 --> 00:14:40,421 - Call him. - Call him? 254 00:14:41,927 --> 00:14:44,399 Why don't we go to his house, stand on opposite sides of the room, 255 00:14:44,524 --> 00:14:45,807 see which one he runs to? 256 00:14:45,976 --> 00:14:48,521 - You get the check. I'll get the car. - We are not going over there. 257 00:14:48,689 --> 00:14:50,082 And we're not calling him. 258 00:14:51,262 --> 00:14:53,991 Who cares which one he has a crush on? The important thing is... 259 00:14:54,772 --> 00:14:56,374 I have a crush on you. 260 00:14:57,382 --> 00:14:59,459 And I wouldn't blame Broderick if he did, too. 261 00:15:02,455 --> 00:15:03,756 That's so sweet. 262 00:15:04,642 --> 00:15:07,392 I wouldn't blame him if he had a crush on you, either. 263 00:15:07,922 --> 00:15:08,923 Good. 264 00:15:10,955 --> 00:15:12,868 - "Good" what? - Just, good. 265 00:15:13,544 --> 00:15:15,288 "Good" meaning we're done with this, 266 00:15:15,413 --> 00:15:17,620 or "good" meaning you still think he has a crush on you? 267 00:15:21,257 --> 00:15:23,358 - The second one. - I'm getting the car. 268 00:15:29,050 --> 00:15:30,997 Would you please just come in the house? 269 00:15:31,122 --> 00:15:34,196 You had a whole year to plan, but you don't make an effort. 270 00:15:34,364 --> 00:15:37,912 I am the second wife, Jay. Why do you treat me like I'm the first? 271 00:15:38,220 --> 00:15:40,124 Talk about it inside. Where are you going? 272 00:15:40,293 --> 00:15:42,133 I'm gonna take a ride. I need to cool down. 273 00:15:42,258 --> 00:15:45,802 - Come in. I promise you'll feel better. - I don't want to go in there. 274 00:15:45,971 --> 00:15:48,253 - You're gonna like it better inside. - Don't hold me back. 275 00:15:48,378 --> 00:15:50,698 I'm sorry about this, honey. I'm sorry. 276 00:15:50,823 --> 00:15:52,840 Jay, what are you doing? Are you crazy? 277 00:15:55,877 --> 00:15:57,997 What are you doing? Have you lost your mind? 278 00:15:58,122 --> 00:15:59,823 No, but you're about to. 279 00:16:00,585 --> 00:16:02,268 Happy Valentine's day! 280 00:16:07,317 --> 00:16:08,518 What the hell? 281 00:16:12,763 --> 00:16:13,764 Honey. 282 00:16:13,985 --> 00:16:15,154 I'm going for a drive. 283 00:16:15,279 --> 00:16:17,908 I had a whole private dinner planned. I don't know what happened. 284 00:16:18,077 --> 00:16:19,077 But I do. 285 00:16:19,599 --> 00:16:22,250 - I know exactly what happened! - No, you don't. 286 00:16:27,853 --> 00:16:30,183 - What the hell? - I win! 287 00:16:30,955 --> 00:16:32,520 I see you sneaking around, 288 00:16:32,824 --> 00:16:35,318 trying to trick me, so when I figure it out, 289 00:16:35,801 --> 00:16:38,822 I move the party over here, and I trick you. 290 00:16:38,948 --> 00:16:40,870 - I win! - What do you mean, you win? 291 00:16:40,996 --> 00:16:43,250 I know you think I think you're not romantic, 292 00:16:43,554 --> 00:16:45,964 but I think you think I'm not smarter than you. 293 00:16:46,089 --> 00:16:47,144 So now we know. 294 00:16:47,269 --> 00:16:50,097 You are romantic, and I'm smarter than you. 295 00:16:50,420 --> 00:16:52,018 And I bought you a motorcycle. 296 00:16:53,540 --> 00:16:54,773 God, it's fantastic. 297 00:16:55,214 --> 00:16:56,315 I win again! 298 00:16:56,440 --> 00:16:58,131 Honey, I love all this, 299 00:16:58,435 --> 00:17:00,268 but you can't win Valentine's day. 300 00:17:00,393 --> 00:17:04,393 You defeat the whole idea if you make it into some silly competition. 301 00:17:04,912 --> 00:17:06,163 Shut up. I win. 302 00:17:10,662 --> 00:17:12,317 - Let's go. - We're really doing this? 303 00:17:12,442 --> 00:17:14,310 - We're doing this. - Well, it's gonna be me. 304 00:17:14,435 --> 00:17:16,435 I'm already embarrassed for you. 305 00:17:16,826 --> 00:17:18,477 - Oh, wait. - What? 306 00:17:19,193 --> 00:17:20,881 Oh, it's a text from Broderick. 307 00:17:21,006 --> 00:17:22,007 Read it. 308 00:17:23,899 --> 00:17:27,213 "By now I'm sure Cameron has told you what happened in the elevator." 309 00:17:27,510 --> 00:17:29,485 "While I meant every word I said, 310 00:17:29,610 --> 00:17:33,058 "I realize how unprofessional I was. Please accept my resignation. 311 00:17:34,013 --> 00:17:36,189 "What you have with Cam is very special, 312 00:17:36,358 --> 00:17:39,013 "and I would never forgive myself if I came between you. 313 00:17:39,698 --> 00:17:41,951 "Treasure each other. Sincerely, Broderick." 314 00:17:44,591 --> 00:17:47,378 - Oh, Cam, what are we doing here? - I don't know. 315 00:17:48,324 --> 00:17:50,868 Maybe if some assistant's crush is so important to us, 316 00:17:50,994 --> 00:17:54,351 it means we should appreciate each other a little bit more. 317 00:17:55,299 --> 00:17:56,981 I can't think of a better time to start. 318 00:17:57,150 --> 00:17:58,150 Come here. 319 00:18:00,128 --> 00:18:03,912 The great thing is we don't have to know which one of us he wanted. 320 00:18:04,080 --> 00:18:04,871 I know. 321 00:18:05,041 --> 00:18:05,999 I know. 322 00:18:06,168 --> 00:18:07,168 I know. 323 00:18:13,474 --> 00:18:14,849 What are you doing? 324 00:18:15,019 --> 00:18:18,193 Valentine's day isn't over yet, Juliana. 325 00:18:18,467 --> 00:18:21,238 Sweetie, let's not push it. You almost got arrested tonight. 326 00:18:21,406 --> 00:18:24,077 That's how it's gonna be? You're just giving up on us? 327 00:18:24,245 --> 00:18:25,662 I am not giving up on us. 328 00:18:25,787 --> 00:18:28,621 I am giving up on Clive and Juliana. 329 00:18:29,197 --> 00:18:30,339 Wait, wait, wait. 330 00:18:31,179 --> 00:18:33,595 I know a couple people who could possibly save this night. 331 00:18:33,764 --> 00:18:35,307 Maybe you've heard of them. 332 00:18:35,702 --> 00:18:38,623 "Two american kids, doing the best that they can... " 333 00:18:39,716 --> 00:18:41,278 Phil and Claire Dunphy. 334 00:18:41,446 --> 00:18:44,784 I'm not going back to that hotel, and I'm sure you're not allowed to. 335 00:18:44,954 --> 00:18:46,778 No need to. Phil and Claire have a bedroom, 336 00:18:46,904 --> 00:18:48,960 which they can turn into a hotel whenever they want. 337 00:18:50,379 --> 00:18:51,506 But the kids... 338 00:18:51,831 --> 00:18:53,620 They're not expecting us home this early. 339 00:18:56,567 --> 00:18:58,171 You up for a little adventure... 340 00:19:01,911 --> 00:19:03,709 Do you think you can handle it... 341 00:19:10,958 --> 00:19:13,005 "I can't be the girl you want me to be, David. 342 00:19:13,130 --> 00:19:14,531 "I can only be me." 343 00:19:17,024 --> 00:19:18,025 Send it. 344 00:19:18,822 --> 00:19:19,974 I don't know. 345 00:19:20,099 --> 00:19:21,274 Here, I'll help you. 346 00:19:27,920 --> 00:19:29,207 That feels really good. 347 00:19:29,608 --> 00:19:31,086 Because you're free. 348 00:19:31,396 --> 00:19:34,712 And really scary. I haven't been single since I was 9. 349 00:19:34,837 --> 00:19:36,638 That's why you need to take your time. 350 00:19:36,807 --> 00:19:39,593 Really get to know yourself before you make any decisions... 351 00:19:39,718 --> 00:19:41,273 Five, six years maybe. 352 00:19:41,642 --> 00:19:43,628 Years? I have to call David. 353 00:19:43,753 --> 00:19:46,366 The boy who tossed you aside on Valentine's day? 354 00:19:47,590 --> 00:19:49,164 You deserve better, Haley. 355 00:19:49,332 --> 00:19:50,985 A dreamer, a poet. 356 00:19:51,423 --> 00:19:52,574 Wait for him. 357 00:19:52,699 --> 00:19:54,801 He may be closer than you think. 358 00:19:56,980 --> 00:19:58,182 Do you hear music? 359 00:19:58,817 --> 00:20:00,979 Yes, and the fact that you hear it too... 360 00:20:01,104 --> 00:20:02,071 Is that Dylan? 361 00:20:12,566 --> 00:20:14,297 Imagine me naked 362 00:20:15,395 --> 00:20:18,472 I imagine you nude 363 00:20:18,988 --> 00:20:21,406 Am I a bad enough parent to ignore that? 364 00:20:21,531 --> 00:20:22,532 You are. 365 00:20:23,431 --> 00:20:24,832 You're really bad. 366 00:20:27,771 --> 00:20:31,122 With all my best friends 367 00:20:32,752 --> 00:20:34,163 The old Haley would have... 368 00:20:34,288 --> 00:20:35,342 I love you, baby! 369 00:20:47,844 --> 00:20:48,908 There's my back. 370 00:20:50,904 --> 00:20:52,184 Oh, no, keep the change. 371 00:20:53,191 --> 00:20:55,254 Did you put an extra tiramisu in here? 372 00:20:55,842 --> 00:20:57,666 - Maybe. - Ryan, again? 373 00:20:57,791 --> 00:20:58,886 I like coming here. 374 00:20:59,611 --> 00:21:01,253 I tell you, if you were single...