1 00:00:06,960 --> 00:00:11,450 Ate nights in there. 2 00:00:11,470 --> 00:00:15,050 Some of them I even spent studying. Don't tell your mom. 3 00:00:15,070 --> 00:00:17,410 And maybe don't tell me. 4 00:00:17,890 --> 00:00:19,740 College! 5 00:00:19,760 --> 00:00:21,320 He was shielding his eyes from the sun. 6 00:00:21,340 --> 00:00:22,390 Knew it when I hit it. 7 00:00:22,410 --> 00:00:25,340 Phil is taking haley to visit his alma mater. 8 00:00:25,360 --> 00:00:27,170 Loved college. 9 00:00:27,190 --> 00:00:30,130 Mm, we were hoping some of that enthusiasm rubs off on her. 10 00:00:30,150 --> 00:00:31,980 Go, bullfrogs! 11 00:00:31,990 --> 00:00:36,190 Dogs. Bulldogs. I feel like you do that on purpose. 12 00:00:36,220 --> 00:00:40,360 No, it's just— I say "bull," and I can't remember if it's frogs or dogs. 13 00:00:40,370 --> 00:00:45,260 When I talk to my old friends from college, Do we croak or do we bark? 14 00:00:45,590 --> 00:00:50,440 I got it. Hello? 15 00:00:57,110 --> 00:01:00,850 No way! Haley, no way! Check it out! 16 00:01:00,880 --> 00:01:03,030 After a few beers, my buds and I would jump on these lunch trays 17 00:01:03,060 --> 00:01:04,680 And race down this same hill. Hop on. 18 00:01:04,700 --> 00:01:06,730 - I don't want to to hop on. - Seriously, you'll get the giggles. 19 00:01:06,750 --> 00:01:11,150 - I don't want the giggles. - Hey, honey. 20 00:01:11,180 --> 00:01:13,040 - How's the trip going? - So good. 21 00:01:13,050 --> 00:01:16,160 Go, bullfrogs. 22 00:01:16,190 --> 00:01:17,680 It's dogs. 23 00:01:17,700 --> 00:01:19,980 Oh, sorry. How's haley doing? 24 00:01:19,990 --> 00:01:25,770 She's... She's loving it. She's loving it. 25 00:01:25,780 --> 00:01:29,380 I showed her the student union. We visited the dorms. 26 00:01:29,580 --> 00:01:31,460 We sat in on a class. 27 00:01:31,480 --> 00:01:35,050 I really think she's starting to see what college has to offer. 28 00:01:35,100 --> 00:01:37,510 Oh, hang on, claire. 29 00:01:39,110 --> 00:01:41,040 Go, bulldogs! 30 00:01:41,050 --> 00:01:44,600 - =http://bbs.sfile2012. com=- - =http://ytet. org=- Proudly Presents 31 00:01:44,640 --> 00:01:48,870 - =http://bbs.sfile2012. com=- - =http://ytet. org=- É­Æo°®ÂüÄá 32 00:01:48,940 --> 00:01:51,410 Modern Family Season 3 Episode 06 33 00:01:53,810 --> 00:01:58,450 Manny, who is this bella girl, And why is her name all over your notebook? 34 00:01:58,470 --> 00:01:59,860 Bella's no girl, mom. 35 00:01:59,880 --> 00:02:03,310 She has recently blossomed, like a purple lilac in april. 36 00:02:03,330 --> 00:02:05,570 What do you mean, she blossom? 37 00:02:05,610 --> 00:02:06,790 Like, the poo-berty? 38 00:02:06,830 --> 00:02:09,530 Yeah. I'll get it. 39 00:02:09,550 --> 00:02:11,990 Hey,gloria, your show's about to start. 40 00:02:12,030 --> 00:02:12,920 Record it. 41 00:02:12,940 --> 00:02:16,470 No, the dvr's filling up. Let's just watch and get it over with. 42 00:02:16,490 --> 00:02:19,440 Gloria's always saying we should do more stuff together. 43 00:02:19,490 --> 00:02:23,320 So I agreed to watch this crazy colombian soap opera she loves. 44 00:02:23,360 --> 00:02:24,920 "fuego y hielo." 45 00:02:24,960 --> 00:02:28,600 Which apparently, is spanish for "big hair and yelling." 46 00:02:28,630 --> 00:02:34,090 "fire and ice." It's about human suffering. I relate to it. 47 00:02:34,140 --> 00:02:37,490 I'm just saying, the guy's a judge. He can put a shirt on. 48 00:02:38,060 --> 00:02:40,330 - Ay, what is that? - Oh, nothing. 49 00:02:40,330 --> 00:02:43,110 That doesn't look like a nothing. What is inside? 50 00:02:43,130 --> 00:02:44,650 Oh, it's just something I bought. 51 00:02:44,670 --> 00:02:47,040 I'm gonna go open it in my room. 52 00:02:47,860 --> 00:02:49,180 I don't like this. 53 00:02:49,200 --> 00:02:51,410 Manny has never kept a secret from me. 54 00:02:51,410 --> 00:02:52,840 Don't worry about it. 55 00:02:52,860 --> 00:02:54,720 What do you think it could be? 56 00:02:54,790 --> 00:02:58,550 Well, right now I'm a little worried It could be the rest of my evening. 57 00:02:58,620 --> 00:03:00,380 Mwah! Bye-bye. Love you. 58 00:03:00,420 --> 00:03:03,440 Hey,claire, listen. Uh, if you want, Some of the moms are gonna stay and watch 59 00:03:03,440 --> 00:03:05,670 "gone with the wind" In my new screening room. 60 00:03:05,690 --> 00:03:07,330 I got pinot! 61 00:03:07,370 --> 00:03:09,290 I would love to, but I'm not feeling that great, 62 00:03:09,310 --> 00:03:11,860 So I'm probably just gonna go home and rest. 63 00:03:11,910 --> 00:03:13,120 Plus I've seen that movie. 64 00:03:13,180 --> 00:03:14,640 No,I never saw "gone with the wind," 65 00:03:14,660 --> 00:03:18,550 But I have two kids at sleepovers, And haley's out of town with phil. 66 00:03:18,580 --> 00:03:22,320 That means I have one night to myself, Which happens once every never. 67 00:03:22,340 --> 00:03:26,640 I am not spending it With some gossipy mom who was mean to me in high school. 68 00:03:26,680 --> 00:03:29,730 I need a fun night out. 69 00:03:30,390 --> 00:03:32,530 What the hell is this? No. 70 00:03:32,570 --> 00:03:35,160 I asked you guys for a fun night out, not this. 71 00:03:35,170 --> 00:03:38,560 I-I-I need music and dancing and secondhand smoke. 72 00:03:38,580 --> 00:03:40,530 Oh, please give this place a chance. It's a great value. 73 00:03:40,550 --> 00:03:44,470 The room is so cozy, And the potpies are to die for. 74 00:03:44,510 --> 00:03:46,520 Are you really comfortable with what you just said? 75 00:03:46,540 --> 00:03:49,540 Come on. What happened to the party people Who took me to a rave, 76 00:03:49,560 --> 00:03:53,360 and I got to wear a tube top, And I stuffed cash in a caged go-go boy's speedo? 77 00:03:53,390 --> 00:03:54,940 We're still party people. 78 00:03:54,990 --> 00:03:57,480 Oh,joanne, before I forget, can I get a punch? 79 00:03:57,500 --> 00:03:59,030 One away from a free potpie. 80 00:03:59,050 --> 00:04:00,880 If that was your gay card, it would be revoked. 81 00:04:00,930 --> 00:04:02,410 Okay, you know what, claire? 82 00:04:02,450 --> 00:04:03,460 You're being a little high school you. 83 00:04:03,500 --> 00:04:05,920 I am sorry,mitchell, but I get one free night, 84 00:04:05,940 --> 00:04:09,810 And I can't spend it at a place That is a proud supporter of wilson elementary. 85 00:04:09,840 --> 00:04:12,540 - We all need to give back, claire. - Give me back my night. 86 00:04:12,570 --> 00:04:17,530 Okay,well, longinus did invite us to a boutique opening, You know,cocktails, dj. 87 00:04:17,620 --> 00:04:20,340 But it'll—it'll be a whole scene, though. 88 00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:22,620 A scene? A scene is perfect. That's great. 89 00:04:22,640 --> 00:04:24,340 I will get in the car before you guys change your mind. 90 00:04:24,370 --> 00:04:26,170 Come on. Let's go. Let's go. 91 00:04:26,170 --> 00:04:27,490 So does that mean no potpies? 92 00:04:27,510 --> 00:04:30,800 Uh,hey, joanne? Two number nines to go. 93 00:04:31,340 --> 00:04:32,560 Was I wrong? 94 00:04:32,580 --> 00:04:34,610 Are these not the best wings you've ever had in your life? 95 00:04:34,630 --> 00:04:37,440 - Oh, my god. - And you didn't wanna get 40. 96 00:04:37,460 --> 00:04:40,580 Oh, and by the way, this is just the start of your evening. 97 00:04:40,600 --> 00:04:44,770 Next up, it's over to the quad For a musical interlude from tenors, anyone? 98 00:04:44,790 --> 00:04:45,770 It's an all-male singing group— 99 00:04:45,790 --> 00:04:47,430 got it. 100 00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:50,540 Weren't you on my tour this morning? 101 00:04:50,590 --> 00:04:52,360 Yeah,I'm haley, and this is my d— 102 00:04:52,380 --> 00:04:56,460 Big brother. You bought it for a second. How are you? 103 00:04:56,650 --> 00:04:59,220 Okay. Anyway, you know what? 104 00:04:59,240 --> 00:05:01,380 There is a student mixer going on tonight. 105 00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:03,390 If you wanna go, me and a bunch of other girls Are gonna head over there. 106 00:05:03,410 --> 00:05:07,380 Oh! Uh, you know what? That's okay. 107 00:05:07,430 --> 00:05:10,340 My dad's got this whole thing planned... But thank you anyway. 108 00:05:10,360 --> 00:05:12,260 No problem. Well, it was nice meeting you. 109 00:05:12,290 --> 00:05:14,750 Nice meeting you. 110 00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:18,120 How fun is this? Just me and you. 111 00:05:18,320 --> 00:05:20,670 I was a little nervous You wouldn't see what's so special about this place. 112 00:05:20,690 --> 00:05:22,330 Not that I'm pushing you to come here. 113 00:05:22,350 --> 00:05:26,060 You know, you're— You're gonna make your own decisions. 114 00:05:26,390 --> 00:05:28,170 You wanna go with them, don't you? 115 00:05:28,180 --> 00:05:29,230 No, we're doing our thing. 116 00:05:29,250 --> 00:05:31,210 Yeah, quick. Before they leave. 117 00:05:31,250 --> 00:05:33,130 - Are you sure? - Go. I can handle it. 118 00:05:33,160 --> 00:05:36,780 You're not the first girl to leave me at this table With a plateful of chicken wings. 119 00:05:36,800 --> 00:05:39,200 I'm kidding! 120 00:05:39,220 --> 00:05:40,670 I wish I was kidding. 121 00:05:40,690 --> 00:05:42,470 you weren't supposed to hear that. Have fun. 122 00:05:42,480 --> 00:05:44,460 Okay. Love you. 123 00:05:44,480 --> 00:05:47,310 Love you. 124 00:05:50,700 --> 00:05:53,050 Nose job. 125 00:05:53,990 --> 00:05:56,670 Butt lift. Last summer, that thing was 4 inches off the ground. 126 00:05:56,690 --> 00:05:59,260 What do they do with all the butt they take out? 127 00:05:59,320 --> 00:06:01,610 I have a theory. 128 00:06:02,920 --> 00:06:04,280 Oh, damn! Here comes my ex. 129 00:06:04,300 --> 00:06:05,580 - Who? Randolph? - Marcus? 130 00:06:05,600 --> 00:06:09,180 - Lamichael? - No. Matt. I gotta go. 131 00:06:09,190 --> 00:06:13,170 Drama. Love it! This is what I wanted. 132 00:06:13,190 --> 00:06:15,520 - Who needs a drink? - I could use a little seltzer water. 133 00:06:15,550 --> 00:06:18,310 - More bubbly, claire? - Mm,I will be after I get a drink. 134 00:06:18,310 --> 00:06:21,750 See, that's what gay is supposed to be like. 135 00:06:21,970 --> 00:06:22,770 Okay,I don't know about you, 136 00:06:22,790 --> 00:06:24,250 But I got about five minutes of fabulous left in me. 137 00:06:24,270 --> 00:06:25,960 Yeah, in my mind,I'm already in our kitchen. 138 00:06:26,000 --> 00:06:28,990 I'm watching my potpie rotate in the microwave. 139 00:06:29,020 --> 00:06:31,070 Okay. Okay. When did hats come back? 140 00:06:31,070 --> 00:06:32,460 That one's come back about eight times. 141 00:06:32,480 --> 00:06:34,410 Pick a side of the room, lady. 142 00:06:34,430 --> 00:06:37,660 All right,there's, like,A thousand people waiting for wine. 143 00:06:37,690 --> 00:06:39,060 I wanna try on a couple of dresses, 144 00:06:39,090 --> 00:06:42,010 And then julian here's gonna take us to a club across town. 145 00:06:42,030 --> 00:06:43,870 I think we're gonna go home. 146 00:06:43,910 --> 00:06:45,620 What? Why? It's 9:30. 147 00:06:45,650 --> 00:06:47,220 It's 9:30? 148 00:06:47,270 --> 00:06:49,530 When did you two become such old women? 149 00:06:49,550 --> 00:06:51,710 First, you take me to that senior center for porridge, 150 00:06:51,750 --> 00:06:53,650 And now you can't even stay up past luke's bedtime? 151 00:06:53,680 --> 00:06:56,330 - It's friday. We get tired on fridays. - We get very tired. 152 00:06:56,350 --> 00:06:59,810 I have 3 children. I've been tired since 2005. 153 00:06:59,860 --> 00:07:01,730 Let's rally. You're my ride. 154 00:07:01,780 --> 00:07:04,040 If you want to stay out,I can take you home. 155 00:07:04,090 --> 00:07:06,320 - Really? - Of course. 156 00:07:06,370 --> 00:07:10,850 Okay. All right,girls, go home, Roll up your hair, clap out the lights, 157 00:07:10,880 --> 00:07:15,260 'Cause this guy, who I just met, is gonna show me a good time. 158 00:07:15,290 --> 00:07:18,540 Okay,well, if he was straight, This would be just like high school. 159 00:07:20,080 --> 00:07:21,650 This is ridiculous. 160 00:07:21,690 --> 00:07:24,810 She's obviously got a pistol under that poncho. 161 00:07:24,840 --> 00:07:26,860 How do you watch this stuff? 162 00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:28,870 He's been up there for more than one hour. I can't stand this. 163 00:07:28,890 --> 00:07:32,160 Who's been up there? Ronaldo's doing the dishes right in front of her. 164 00:07:32,180 --> 00:07:33,730 Manny, in his bedroom. 165 00:07:33,750 --> 00:07:35,720 Gloria, are you even watching this? 166 00:07:35,760 --> 00:07:37,150 I'm doing this for you. 167 00:07:37,170 --> 00:07:41,040 What does he has in that box that he cannot show to me? 168 00:07:41,080 --> 00:07:43,540 Little boys are supposed to keep secrets from their mothers. 169 00:07:43,540 --> 00:07:46,420 Wait. The judge just peeked through the window. 170 00:07:46,450 --> 00:07:48,420 Is he interested in celia now? 171 00:07:48,440 --> 00:07:49,890 She could be his daughter. 172 00:07:49,930 --> 00:07:52,550 I bet it's a birthday gift for me. 173 00:07:52,560 --> 00:07:55,250 Yeah, that sounds right. What's he saying? 174 00:07:55,300 --> 00:07:57,220 I've never seen him this mad. 175 00:07:57,250 --> 00:07:59,170 Wait a minute. 176 00:07:59,220 --> 00:08:02,510 I already found my birthday gift underneath his bed. 177 00:08:02,550 --> 00:08:04,260 It's a giant hat. 178 00:08:04,310 --> 00:08:06,230 When did hats came back anyway? 179 00:08:06,250 --> 00:08:07,940 Now she's reaching under the poncho. 180 00:08:07,950 --> 00:08:09,950 Like she's gonna shoot ronaldo. 181 00:08:09,970 --> 00:08:11,620 He's the main character, right? 182 00:08:11,640 --> 00:08:12,740 That's it. I'm going up there. 183 00:08:12,790 --> 00:08:14,460 Wait, gloria. No. Don't go. 184 00:08:14,480 --> 00:08:15,890 - Why not? - Think about it. 185 00:08:15,900 --> 00:08:18,490 13-year-old boy, talks about girls all day long. 186 00:08:18,500 --> 00:08:21,360 We have more security on these computers than the pentagon. 187 00:08:21,370 --> 00:08:24,580 What do you think he's doing up there... Alone? 188 00:08:26,060 --> 00:08:27,890 Do you think he ordered some movies? 189 00:08:27,920 --> 00:08:29,720 Movies,magazines, whatever the hell. 190 00:08:29,740 --> 00:08:32,490 How dare do you say that, jay? 191 00:08:32,560 --> 00:08:35,040 He's a little boy! He's just a boy. 192 00:08:35,040 --> 00:08:36,940 I don't want to talk to you. I'm gonna take a walk. 193 00:08:36,940 --> 00:08:40,540 Gloria, come on. Come back. I know you're not mad at me. 194 00:08:40,560 --> 00:08:44,340 You just... Oh! What'd she do? 195 00:08:44,880 --> 00:08:46,650 Ronaldo! 196 00:08:48,540 --> 00:08:50,180 Wang chung! 197 00:08:50,230 --> 00:08:52,320 Pay up, gentlemen! 198 00:08:53,540 --> 00:08:56,520 Yes! Thank you! 199 00:08:56,550 --> 00:08:58,430 Really? That's so nice. 200 00:08:58,470 --> 00:09:00,020 Another pitcher, my good woman. 201 00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:03,100 Claire would have killed me if she'd known That I let haley go off alone 202 00:09:03,120 --> 00:09:07,500 While I chilled in a bar with some undergrads, But I happen to trust my daughter. 203 00:09:08,280 --> 00:09:11,880 Also,I was tracking her location With the gps on her phone. 204 00:09:11,900 --> 00:09:16,390 Fellas, cedar and los alamos. That's, uh... Pi chi house? 205 00:09:16,440 --> 00:09:19,090 Pi chi? 206 00:09:27,210 --> 00:09:30,070 Oh, come on. Why is my bluetooth not working? 207 00:09:30,210 --> 00:09:33,290 Oh, god. It's longinus. He's gonna be so mad at us. 208 00:09:33,330 --> 00:09:35,340 Hey, longe. Don't be mad at us for leaving. 209 00:09:35,360 --> 00:09:37,280 I went back to our spot, and everybody was gone. 210 00:09:37,300 --> 00:09:38,770 Who does that to a sister? 211 00:09:38,810 --> 00:09:42,080 We're sorry, but the sitter called,And,uh, lily was running a fever. 212 00:09:42,130 --> 00:09:46,420 So... We feel even worse About dumping claire on you and your hot date. 213 00:09:46,450 --> 00:09:50,720 Who is gorgeous, by the way. Seems super funny, too. Perfect for you. 214 00:09:50,720 --> 00:09:54,090 Please,I wish that was a date. He's my trainer, and he's straight. 215 00:09:54,110 --> 00:09:55,430 What? Julian's straight. 216 00:09:55,460 --> 00:09:59,180 Oh,I love it When a straight person and a gay person Go out together. 217 00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:00,850 I'd love it a lot more if he was gay. 218 00:10:00,870 --> 00:10:02,970 Oh, my god. This isn't our car. 219 00:10:02,990 --> 00:10:04,050 - What? - This isn't our prius! 220 00:10:04,090 --> 00:10:06,290 They—they must've given us the wrong one at the valet. 221 00:10:06,320 --> 00:10:08,030 That's why the bluetooth isn't working. 222 00:10:08,060 --> 00:10:10,090 - We stole a car? Are you serious? - What's happening? 223 00:10:10,110 --> 00:10:11,930 Oh, we stole a car. Uh, we gotta go. 224 00:10:11,940 --> 00:10:14,620 Okay, we did not steal a car, cam. It was given to us. 225 00:10:14,640 --> 00:10:17,080 Why are you giving me attitude? You're the one that stole a car. 226 00:10:17,110 --> 00:10:20,090 How is this a stolen car? How? 227 00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:22,720 I don't know! I'm confused! Do you have an aspirin? 228 00:10:22,730 --> 00:10:24,990 This isn't my car! 229 00:10:28,870 --> 00:10:32,040 Hey, lukie. Hi. What's going on? 230 00:10:33,580 --> 00:10:35,230 I'll check. 231 00:10:35,250 --> 00:10:36,900 I have it. 232 00:10:36,940 --> 00:10:40,340 Well,I could bring it by And meet you outside in 20 minutes? 233 00:10:40,380 --> 00:10:42,040 No, sw—out—out— outside, sweetie. 234 00:10:42,070 --> 00:10:44,160 Okay. Bye-bye. 235 00:10:44,180 --> 00:10:46,840 Do you mind swinging by my kid's sleepover? 236 00:10:46,850 --> 00:10:49,120 I gotta give him this retainer. It's on the way to the club. 237 00:10:49,170 --> 00:10:51,070 Sure, no problem. 238 00:10:51,090 --> 00:10:52,430 You are so sweet. 239 00:10:52,460 --> 00:10:55,530 Holy pythons, batman. Do you ever leave the gym? 240 00:10:55,580 --> 00:10:57,850 Uh, no. Actually,I'm a trainer and a masseur. 241 00:10:57,870 --> 00:11:01,470 Oh, my god. I'm gonna have to try out that second one. 242 00:11:01,500 --> 00:11:03,660 Zip, please. 243 00:11:03,680 --> 00:11:07,870 I gotta say, This night is turning out to be a lot more fun than I expected. 244 00:11:07,900 --> 00:11:11,420 I've got two kids at sleepovers and one upstate with daddy. 245 00:11:11,440 --> 00:11:14,760 The fun is just beginning. 246 00:11:19,260 --> 00:11:21,710 Unbelievable. The valet gave our car away to someone, like, 247 00:11:21,740 --> 00:11:23,230 And hour and a half ago. 248 00:11:23,250 --> 00:11:27,260 You know what that means. Our potpies could be anywhere by now. 249 00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:30,530 Y— They probably went home. If—if we knew their address, 250 00:11:30,550 --> 00:11:32,300 Maybe we could see if our car was there. 251 00:11:32,320 --> 00:11:34,500 Oh, yeah. And how do you propose we do that? 252 00:11:34,520 --> 00:11:37,110 Calculating route home. 253 00:11:37,260 --> 00:11:40,830 Oh, you're good. Oh, and look. Only.6 miles away. 254 00:11:40,860 --> 00:11:43,960 Prepare to turn right in 500 feet. 255 00:11:43,980 --> 00:11:46,630 Notice how she didn't wait until after the turn to tell me, cam? 256 00:11:46,650 --> 00:11:48,970 - Really? This? Now? - I'm just... 257 00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:50,510 Oh, look. They went to see jay-z. 258 00:11:50,530 --> 00:11:51,990 We almost went to see jay-z, didn't we? 259 00:11:52,030 --> 00:11:53,950 No,no, no,'cause remember it started at 8:30. 260 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:56,240 oh,yeah, Which meant he wouldn't have gone on until 10:00. 261 00:11:56,260 --> 00:11:59,280 - And then that parking nightmare. - Oh, and those stairs. 262 00:11:59,330 --> 00:12:01,230 Okay,I'm hearing it now. 263 00:12:01,250 --> 00:12:03,040 Is claire right? Are we in a rut? 264 00:12:03,070 --> 00:12:05,270 Well, we might be, especially compared to these people. 265 00:12:05,290 --> 00:12:07,920 Look at this. Cancun luggage tickets. 266 00:12:07,970 --> 00:12:09,690 A parking pass to yosemite. 267 00:12:09,710 --> 00:12:12,320 A triathlon bib. This is living. 268 00:12:12,370 --> 00:12:14,740 No, but you know what? We have lily, okay? 269 00:12:14,780 --> 00:12:16,410 I know. You can't do that with a child. 270 00:12:16,430 --> 00:12:18,470 They have a car seat. 271 00:12:18,510 --> 00:12:19,960 Okay,fine, we're in a rut. 272 00:12:19,980 --> 00:12:22,360 Destination ahead in 900 feet. 273 00:12:22,370 --> 00:12:25,130 You know, maybe we just need to be around More stimulating people. 274 00:12:25,180 --> 00:12:26,950 Well, we're gonna be in about 900 feet. 275 00:12:26,970 --> 00:12:29,290 It's not the craziest idea. They seem like fun people. 276 00:12:29,310 --> 00:12:31,260 Yeah, and maybe we can be new couples friends with them. 277 00:12:31,280 --> 00:12:33,180 You know, we can go out to concerts, 278 00:12:33,220 --> 00:12:35,990 Try exciting new food, maybe do some luxury camping. 279 00:12:36,020 --> 00:12:39,920 Yeah, hitch our wagon to their star And see how fast they spice up our life. 280 00:12:39,940 --> 00:12:40,950 You have arrived. 281 00:12:41,010 --> 00:12:43,580 I believe we have. 282 00:12:43,600 --> 00:12:45,890 You dumb son of a bitch! 283 00:12:45,910 --> 00:12:49,000 - Oh, my god! Oh, my god. - What's happening? 284 00:12:49,010 --> 00:12:52,810 I can't believe you came back here, you filthy, cheating pig! 285 00:12:52,810 --> 00:12:54,050 Where is she? Where is she? 286 00:12:54,050 --> 00:12:56,090 I'm trying! We are in a rut! 287 00:12:56,110 --> 00:12:57,750 Really? You wanna talk about that right now? 288 00:12:57,780 --> 00:13:00,790 No, we are stuck! We're in an actual rut. We're stuck. 289 00:13:00,810 --> 00:13:02,900 Ohh! Oh, my god. Oh, my god! 290 00:13:02,920 --> 00:13:04,750 We are victims of a hate crime right now! 291 00:13:04,770 --> 00:13:06,560 - Go! Go! - Oh, my god! 292 00:13:11,590 --> 00:13:12,980 Oh,no, you don't. 293 00:13:13,020 --> 00:13:14,140 Dad, what are you doing here? 294 00:13:14,140 --> 00:13:15,850 - What's this, buddy. - Ginger ale. 295 00:13:15,890 --> 00:13:18,330 Oh, really? 'Cause is smells— okay, it smells like ginger ale. 296 00:13:18,350 --> 00:13:19,570 But that doesn't prove anything. 297 00:13:19,600 --> 00:13:21,120 - What the hell? - We are leaving. 298 00:13:21,130 --> 00:13:23,390 - I'm having a nice time with... - With this clown? 299 00:13:23,430 --> 00:13:27,340 And by the way, it's a little cliche To pick someone who looks exactly like your dad. 300 00:13:27,360 --> 00:13:28,910 I got your number, pi chi. 301 00:13:28,930 --> 00:13:31,130 - I know you. - Yeah, you do. 302 00:13:31,170 --> 00:13:33,960 This is ben ford. He's in my class. He's visiting, too. 303 00:13:33,980 --> 00:13:35,610 You were my t-ball coach. 304 00:13:35,630 --> 00:13:39,670 My dad's your doctor. He's right over there. 305 00:13:40,120 --> 00:13:41,510 What is wrong with you? 306 00:13:41,520 --> 00:13:44,060 Are you trying to ruin college for me before I even get here? 307 00:13:44,060 --> 00:13:47,220 No,I-I'm not. I am so sorry. You are not a clown. 308 00:13:47,260 --> 00:13:49,720 You were an excellent backup shortstop. 309 00:13:49,740 --> 00:13:54,020 Alecia. Bruce. Go, bullfrogs— dogs! Go, bulldogs. 310 00:13:54,050 --> 00:13:55,630 Claire! 311 00:13:55,670 --> 00:13:57,730 Wow. Really? 312 00:13:57,750 --> 00:13:59,670 No, it's just a shock, is all. 313 00:13:59,700 --> 00:14:00,850 Jay? 314 00:14:00,870 --> 00:14:03,320 So celia's carrying the judge's baby. 315 00:14:03,390 --> 00:14:05,810 No wonder she shot him. She's hormonal. 316 00:14:05,830 --> 00:14:07,430 - Who are you talking to? - The housekeeper. 317 00:14:07,470 --> 00:14:10,780 Maria,I've gotta go. Thanks a lot. 318 00:14:10,800 --> 00:14:13,530 - Jay,I need you to talk to manny. - What? 319 00:14:13,580 --> 00:14:15,240 Well, if he's doing what you think he's doing, 320 00:14:15,270 --> 00:14:17,000 Then he needs to talk to a man. 321 00:14:17,030 --> 00:14:18,720 I don't want him to be ashame of anything. 322 00:14:18,740 --> 00:14:20,080 Then you don't want to send me in there. 323 00:14:20,100 --> 00:14:22,540 Yeah, but what if— if he has questions? 324 00:14:22,570 --> 00:14:23,780 What if he doesn't know how to— 325 00:14:23,810 --> 00:14:27,500 Gloria,gloria, whatever he's going through, He can work it out himself. 326 00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:29,110 Help! I'm stuck! 327 00:14:29,120 --> 00:14:31,010 Ay,no,jay, go. I beg of you! 328 00:14:31,040 --> 00:14:32,420 - Go! Go! Go! - Gloria. 329 00:14:32,440 --> 00:14:34,750 I'm extremely reluctant to do this. 330 00:14:34,770 --> 00:14:36,240 Please hurry! 331 00:14:36,260 --> 00:14:38,670 Ay, no. I cannot look at this. 332 00:14:38,690 --> 00:14:41,920 - What the hell? - I can't get down, jay. 333 00:14:42,790 --> 00:14:44,720 What? What happened to manny? 334 00:14:44,740 --> 00:14:46,270 Ay, somebody say something to me! 335 00:14:46,320 --> 00:14:49,860 - Gloria, it's okay. Come on in. - Okay. 336 00:14:50,760 --> 00:14:52,600 He was hanging from that bar up there. 337 00:14:52,610 --> 00:14:55,440 What? Why? What do you have on your head? 338 00:14:55,470 --> 00:14:58,520 It's a weighted helmet to stretch me so I can get taller. 339 00:14:58,940 --> 00:15:02,020 Manny! Why do you have to get tall now? 340 00:15:02,040 --> 00:15:03,730 Love, mom. Why else? 341 00:15:03,750 --> 00:15:07,480 I lost bella to durkus because, in her words,"he's tall." 342 00:15:07,540 --> 00:15:09,810 Everybody else is getting taller but me. 343 00:15:09,830 --> 00:15:10,690 You think it's the coffee? 344 00:15:10,710 --> 00:15:12,780 No. Maybe. 345 00:15:12,800 --> 00:15:16,070 But—but hanging downside up is not gonna help you. 346 00:15:16,090 --> 00:15:18,140 The web site said it would. 347 00:15:18,160 --> 00:15:23,490 Listen,manny, You're already intelligent and beautiful and funny. 348 00:15:23,510 --> 00:15:26,670 If you get tall, you're going to have everything, 349 00:15:26,690 --> 00:15:30,970 And those poor boys Are not gonna have anything to compete with you. 350 00:15:31,010 --> 00:15:32,440 Look at this. 351 00:15:32,460 --> 00:15:34,710 You have a mark on your head now. 352 00:15:34,760 --> 00:15:38,050 I'm gonna go get you some ice, okay? 353 00:15:38,240 --> 00:15:40,320 That's a lot of pretty words, but they don't help me tomorrow. 354 00:15:40,320 --> 00:15:42,560 Sorry, kid. It's just one of those things. 355 00:15:42,570 --> 00:15:44,810 You get taller when you get taller. 356 00:15:44,810 --> 00:15:47,370 Why don't you get ready for bed? 357 00:15:52,760 --> 00:15:55,070 Ah, jeez. 358 00:15:55,130 --> 00:15:59,030 You know, when I was your age,I started working out to get the girls. 359 00:15:59,070 --> 00:16:01,010 - You think that would help? - Yeah. 360 00:16:01,040 --> 00:16:04,610 So tomorrow, we start working out. Okay? 361 00:16:04,860 --> 00:16:10,060 Maybe I'll even show you a few pull-ups On,uh, this bad boy here, huh? 362 00:16:13,740 --> 00:16:15,850 You see that? 363 00:16:16,060 --> 00:16:20,190 Pretty soon, that's how strong... You're gonna be. 364 00:16:21,030 --> 00:16:22,080 Thanks, mom. 365 00:16:22,100 --> 00:16:24,020 I don't want them to know I was here. Okay. 366 00:16:24,050 --> 00:16:26,530 Oh, claire,I thought that was you. Thank god. Come in. 367 00:16:26,600 --> 00:16:29,180 I can't. 'Cause I'm sick, remember? Sorry. 368 00:16:29,200 --> 00:16:31,880 Well, my dvd player just broke, And none of us know how "gone with the wind" ends. 369 00:16:31,900 --> 00:16:32,850 But you saw it, right? I... 370 00:16:32,850 --> 00:16:34,280 - Oh, is that claire? - Yeah. 371 00:16:34,290 --> 00:16:35,570 Can you tell us what happened? 372 00:16:35,590 --> 00:16:37,780 I could, but I don't want to ruin it for you. 373 00:16:37,790 --> 00:16:39,900 Claire. Just tell us. 374 00:16:39,940 --> 00:16:46,550 Um... Scarlett is... Really mad At clark gable 375 00:16:46,570 --> 00:16:49,390 Because,um, he says so many bad things. 376 00:16:49,420 --> 00:16:52,840 And didn't he,um, burn down a farm or something? 377 00:16:52,860 --> 00:16:55,400 Claire, have you been drinking? 378 00:16:55,440 --> 00:16:59,400 I had a hot toddy. Made one for my throat. 379 00:16:59,440 --> 00:17:02,180 Pretty dressed up for a night in bed, right? 380 00:17:02,200 --> 00:17:03,970 Yeah,I-I just threw on the first thing I could find... 381 00:17:03,980 --> 00:17:05,840 When luke called, and it was just right there on the chair. 382 00:17:05,860 --> 00:17:07,070 She has a stamp on her hand. 383 00:17:07,090 --> 00:17:08,370 Okay. All right. 384 00:17:08,390 --> 00:17:10,880 Before we bust out the pitchforks and the torches, 385 00:17:10,900 --> 00:17:13,870 May I remind you That I've driven every one of your children home 386 00:17:13,900 --> 00:17:15,980 And heimliched at least one, bethenny. 387 00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:17,410 - Hi. - Hello. 388 00:17:17,450 --> 00:17:19,880 This is totally inappropriate. But could I use your bathroom? 389 00:17:19,900 --> 00:17:21,210 Sorry. You kept pushing the drinks. 390 00:17:21,250 --> 00:17:24,110 I—friend. Gay friend. Gay. 391 00:17:24,140 --> 00:17:25,970 - I'm not gay. - Yes, you are. 392 00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:28,840 I-I'm not gay. I'm—I'm french. You thought I was gay? 393 00:17:28,880 --> 00:17:30,780 - Are you serious right now? - Well, are you? 394 00:17:30,810 --> 00:17:32,260 You've been throwing yourself at me all night. 395 00:17:32,260 --> 00:17:33,880 No, no. No,I have not. 396 00:17:33,890 --> 00:17:36,650 - Bethenny, grab the pinot. - Bethenny, do not grab the pinot. 397 00:17:36,690 --> 00:17:39,870 You undressed in front of me. You squeezed my arm. 398 00:17:40,220 --> 00:17:42,160 You asked me for a massage. What was all that? 399 00:17:42,160 --> 00:17:45,990 That was—that was me safely objectifying a gay person. 400 00:17:46,010 --> 00:17:49,870 Wow, claire! When I wrote "don't ever change" in your yearbook, 401 00:17:49,870 --> 00:17:51,450 I didn't mean it like this. 402 00:17:51,480 --> 00:17:53,330 Oh, ease up, holly. 403 00:17:53,350 --> 00:17:55,090 Okay,I lied. 404 00:17:55,110 --> 00:17:58,630 I lied, but I get one night to myself, 405 00:17:58,630 --> 00:18:02,530 And I just wanted to spend it with some fun gay people. 406 00:18:02,550 --> 00:18:04,500 It's not my fault this one decided to be straight. 407 00:18:04,500 --> 00:18:05,670 I've always been straight. 408 00:18:05,670 --> 00:18:07,100 Oh, you don't get to talk! 409 00:18:07,120 --> 00:18:09,730 I took fashion advice from you! 410 00:18:09,750 --> 00:18:11,800 Oh, my god. Do I even look good in this dress? 411 00:18:11,820 --> 00:18:14,300 No. Not you. 412 00:18:14,330 --> 00:18:16,180 It's really short, isn't it? 413 00:18:16,180 --> 00:18:18,980 - It's short. - Yeah. 414 00:18:19,510 --> 00:18:22,840 Please? Please, just listen to me for one second. 415 00:18:22,860 --> 00:18:24,610 Go away! Stop following me! 416 00:18:24,620 --> 00:18:26,720 Hey, you wanna tell me Why you're bothering this young lady? 417 00:18:26,750 --> 00:18:29,340 Oh,no,no,no, no. Officer, this is my daughter. Tell him. 418 00:18:29,340 --> 00:18:30,400 Tonight,I don't know who you are. 419 00:18:30,420 --> 00:18:33,070 She's... She's joking. 420 00:18:33,090 --> 00:18:36,400 I'm not dangerous. In fact,I-I-I helped to put all the lights on this path. 421 00:18:36,420 --> 00:18:38,910 20 years ago, some friends and I took back the night. 422 00:18:38,910 --> 00:18:43,370 So... I-I think I just... I embarrassed her a little. 423 00:18:43,400 --> 00:18:44,590 "a little"? 424 00:18:44,620 --> 00:18:47,250 That sweatshirt embarrasses me "a little. 425 00:18:47,290 --> 00:18:49,830 " Yep, that's a daughter. 426 00:18:49,850 --> 00:18:52,960 Tonight was insane. Why did you have to act like that? 427 00:18:52,980 --> 00:18:55,500 You were at that party. I see you talking to frat boys, and— 428 00:18:55,530 --> 00:18:58,890 Isn't that why we're here, so I can experience college? 429 00:18:58,900 --> 00:19:02,170 I mean, what are you gonna do when I actually go? 430 00:19:02,360 --> 00:19:05,180 I don't know. Freak out,I think. 431 00:19:07,360 --> 00:19:13,980 Look... Your whole life, my job has been to protect you— 432 00:19:14,010 --> 00:19:16,680 A job I kinda love. 433 00:19:16,890 --> 00:19:20,550 Now I feel like I'm being forced into early retirement. 434 00:19:20,900 --> 00:19:24,610 I just needed to find you and make sure you were okay... 435 00:19:25,550 --> 00:19:29,280 For as long as I still get to do that. 436 00:19:31,250 --> 00:19:36,330 Just like you— Piss me off and then say something sweet. 437 00:19:37,910 --> 00:19:40,880 I'm not leaving until the fall. 438 00:19:40,940 --> 00:19:45,870 Maybe by then I can figure out How to put a force field around you. 439 00:19:46,340 --> 00:19:47,410 I've been working on that one 440 00:19:47,430 --> 00:19:51,660 Since the first time I tried to fasten you into your car seat. 441 00:19:52,270 --> 00:19:55,180 I pinched your chunky little thigh. 442 00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:02,060 Even though you basically just called me fat. 443 00:20:04,130 --> 00:20:08,090 So... Is it really fun? 444 00:20:08,110 --> 00:20:11,240 What? 445 00:20:16,330 --> 00:20:17,760 No! 446 00:20:17,790 --> 00:20:20,300 We all struggle with limitations... 447 00:20:20,320 --> 00:20:22,250 Some we're willing to accept... 448 00:20:22,250 --> 00:20:26,540 You know,I just wanna be home, Reading on opposite ends of the sofa. 449 00:20:26,570 --> 00:20:28,100 And some we're not. 450 00:20:28,120 --> 00:20:29,860 I'm so embarrassed I did that. 451 00:20:29,900 --> 00:20:32,530 I'm just so happy that that was all it was. 452 00:20:32,550 --> 00:20:35,090 Why? What'd you think I was doing? 453 00:20:35,140 --> 00:20:37,620 It's never too late to grow in life. 454 00:20:37,640 --> 00:20:39,430 Oh, my god! 455 00:20:40,350 --> 00:20:46,050 "thanks to our patented lengthenator, You can increase your height by up to 4 inches." 456 00:20:46,070 --> 00:20:48,610 I can't believe he would spend $50 on this thing. 457 00:20:48,630 --> 00:20:52,550 I know. He could've got A 2-year subscription to "playboy" for that. 458 00:20:52,570 --> 00:20:57,740 He's not getting the "playboy" ever! He's a little boy! 459 00:20:59,260 --> 00:21:02,440 Wouldn't it be great if we woke up tomorrow And our car had found its y home? 460 00:21:02,450 --> 00:21:04,070 Yeah,I feel that's not the way it's gonna happen. 461 00:21:04,120 --> 00:21:05,630 Happened on the farm one time. 462 00:21:05,650 --> 00:21:08,440 A tornado scooped up one of our calves, Dropped it who knows where. 463 00:21:08,440 --> 00:21:11,700 Six months later,A full-grown cow comes walking up the driveway— 464 00:21:11,850 --> 00:21:13,930 Same markings, same moo. Thatight, we— 465 00:21:13,950 --> 00:21:16,950 we ate like kings. Okay,I've told it before. 466 00:21:17,510 --> 00:21:20,520 Oh, my gosh! It's our car! 467 00:21:21,010 --> 00:21:22,980 I see you've met my wife. 468 00:21:23,010 --> 00:21:24,800 - =http://bbs.sfile2012. com=- - =http://ytet. org=- Proudly Presents 469 00:21:24,850 --> 00:21:28,300 - =http://bbs.sfile2012. com=- - =http://ytet. org=- É­Æo°®ÂüÄá 470 00:21:28,340 --> 00:21:30,460 Modern Family Season 3 Episode 06