1 00:00:03,221 --> 00:00:05,333 Oh, thank you so much for the donation. 2 00:00:05,353 --> 00:00:07,756 Oh,I wish I could do more. It's just a bunch of old, out-of-date clothes. 3 00:00:07,766 --> 00:00:09,918 Oh,I'm sure it's great. 4 00:00:10,759 --> 00:00:12,881 Three weeks ago, our neighbors, the rands, 5 00:00:12,921 --> 00:00:16,505 lost their house and everything they own in a fire. 6 00:00:16,525 --> 00:00:18,106 Fortunately, nobody was hurt. 7 00:00:18,116 --> 00:00:20,719 And fortunately, they're friends with wonder woman over here. 8 00:00:20,719 --> 00:00:22,210 I'm hardly wonder woman. 9 00:00:22,230 --> 00:00:26,705 She mobilized the community to donate clothes,furniture, appliances, 10 00:00:26,725 --> 00:00:29,598 - all to help them start over in their new rental. - Which you found them. 11 00:00:29,618 --> 00:00:33,091 I'm no wonder woman. Rand-aid was her idea. 12 00:00:33,111 --> 00:00:35,624 It wasn't my idea to call it "rand-aid." 13 00:00:35,644 --> 00:00:37,455 Okay, fine. 14 00:00:37,476 --> 00:00:39,147 I'm wonder woman. 15 00:00:39,197 --> 00:00:40,458 Terrible tragedy. 16 00:00:40,489 --> 00:00:42,871 - They're our closest friends. - We know them. 17 00:00:42,881 --> 00:00:44,613 Uh, manny and their son reuben are tight. 18 00:00:44,623 --> 00:00:46,144 In fact,I put in one of their closets. 19 00:00:46,164 --> 00:00:49,187 Not that it matters, but it was the only structure to survive the fire. 20 00:00:49,207 --> 00:00:51,319 Por favor, don't even say that word! 21 00:00:51,359 --> 00:00:56,094 in my country it is considered very, very bad luck when your house burns down. 22 00:00:58,306 --> 00:01:00,639 - They lived a block away from us. - Smoke was everywhere. 23 00:01:00,689 --> 00:01:03,472 I was so upset,I couldn't sleep for days. 24 00:01:03,492 --> 00:01:05,724 Of course, mitchell won't let me take anything. 25 00:01:05,724 --> 00:01:08,106 Well,cam, we both know why. 26 00:01:08,136 --> 00:01:12,941 Some people have been known to sleepwalk or even sleep drive on that medication. 27 00:01:12,961 --> 00:01:15,604 Cam's reaction is much worse. 28 00:01:18,867 --> 00:01:21,960 no! 29 00:01:23,722 --> 00:01:26,304 Oh, god. 30 00:01:27,736 --> 00:01:30,008 I sleep clown. 31 00:01:32,270 --> 00:01:33,572 Dad, you're gonna kill yourself. 32 00:01:33,592 --> 00:01:35,333 I got it! We're on a schedule here. 33 00:01:35,333 --> 00:01:36,935 I still have to pick up the truck. 34 00:01:36,945 --> 00:01:38,787 If you want him to stop lifting things, 35 00:01:38,847 --> 00:01:42,450 put all this in grocery bags and turn the tv on to a football game. 36 00:01:42,721 --> 00:01:45,924 - Take this phone away from me! - why? 37 00:01:45,954 --> 00:01:48,156 Two of our best brokers left to start their own agency, 38 00:01:48,176 --> 00:01:50,248 and the office gossip is flying. 39 00:01:50,268 --> 00:01:52,821 But I want today to be about the rands... And if I have this- 40 00:01:52,871 --> 00:01:56,845 Oh, my god! Those guys took two secretaries and the tube dude with them! 41 00:01:56,855 --> 00:01:57,826 Who's the tube dude? 42 00:01:57,856 --> 00:02:00,649 You know, the blowy guy that attracts all the attention. This guy... 43 00:02:01,510 --> 00:02:05,694 Ah, si,I've seen him. He goes down over there, and then he shakes up. 44 00:02:05,724 --> 00:02:08,737 - And goes down in there, and then... - You almost got it. 45 00:02:09,367 --> 00:02:11,790 Hi,hi, sorry. We would have been here sooner, 46 00:02:11,810 --> 00:02:13,622 but this one had a wardrobe crisis. 47 00:02:13,642 --> 00:02:16,565 You know, it's a somber occasion, and all my tops are too joyful. 48 00:02:16,575 --> 00:02:18,497 You do not want our problems. 49 00:02:18,507 --> 00:02:19,978 - Oh,here,jay, let me help. - No,I got it. 50 00:02:19,988 --> 00:02:22,471 - My back! - dad! 51 00:02:22,491 --> 00:02:25,323 No,jay, that's not quite it. Remember, you got air blowing through you, 52 00:02:25,333 --> 00:02:28,747 so it's more like... And then out. And then out. 53 00:02:28,787 --> 00:02:33,111 - =http://bbs.sfile2012. com=- - =http://ytet. org=- Proudly Presents 54 00:02:33,141 --> 00:02:37,636 - =http://bbs.sfile2012. com=- - =http://ytet. org=- É­Æo°®ÂüÄá 55 00:02:37,686 --> 00:02:39,698 Modern Family Season 3 Episode 08 56 00:02:41,700 --> 00:02:45,203 Leave me alone. I'm fine. I've gotta pick up that truck. 57 00:02:45,223 --> 00:02:46,414 I'd be happy to get the truck. 58 00:02:46,414 --> 00:02:48,797 I don't think so. It's a pretty big truck. 59 00:02:48,817 --> 00:02:53,031 Is it-is it bigger than the combine I've been driving since I was 12 years old? 60 00:02:53,061 --> 00:02:55,033 Or the widrow tractor with the macdon header 61 00:02:55,053 --> 00:02:59,107 that I drove to and parallel parked at my high school prom? Hmm? 62 00:02:59,367 --> 00:03:02,350 - At least something got plowed that night. - Heard that! 63 00:03:02,370 --> 00:03:03,902 Oh, son of bitch! 64 00:03:03,902 --> 00:03:06,825 Your low back is in spasm, jay. I can massage that out for you. 65 00:03:06,845 --> 00:03:08,847 - I'm fine. - Dad, you don't know what you're missing. 66 00:03:08,877 --> 00:03:11,850 - Phil is a magician. - And a licensed masseur. 67 00:03:11,860 --> 00:03:14,242 Before I heard the siren song of residential real estate, 68 00:03:14,242 --> 00:03:16,164 I was bitten by the rub bug. 69 00:03:16,174 --> 00:03:18,456 No, he's-he's amazing. I had this knot in my leg, 70 00:03:18,466 --> 00:03:20,138 two minutes with phil and it was gone. 71 00:03:20,138 --> 00:03:22,521 I'm sorry, but I think you might have a higher tolerance 72 00:03:22,521 --> 00:03:24,442 for a man's hands on your body than I do. 73 00:03:24,473 --> 00:03:27,065 - Charming. - Ay, don't be an idiot. 74 00:03:27,075 --> 00:03:29,307 - Let phil help you. - Fine. 75 00:03:29,327 --> 00:03:31,269 Great! I'll just go get the room ready. 76 00:03:31,289 --> 00:03:33,882 I'll think you'll be surprised with what these hands can do. 77 00:03:33,882 --> 00:03:35,694 Really? Can they drive a bobcat skid-steer 78 00:03:35,694 --> 00:03:38,036 with a bucket grapple through a school hallway on a dare? 79 00:03:38,036 --> 00:03:41,069 Because these can and have. 80 00:03:43,642 --> 00:03:47,065 Poor reuben, huh? Having to rebuild his whole life at age 12. 81 00:03:47,085 --> 00:03:49,007 Yeah. That blows. 82 00:03:49,027 --> 00:03:51,810 I know we're both shaken up, but let's watch the language. 83 00:03:51,840 --> 00:03:54,853 Okay, put this in a safe place. It's for reuben. 84 00:03:54,873 --> 00:03:58,416 It's one of those,um, how do you say again, the takka-takka-takka... 85 00:03:58,426 --> 00:04:01,530 Is that the helicopter with the camera in it... That you control with your phone? 86 00:04:01,550 --> 00:04:03,461 The one I asked for? 87 00:04:03,482 --> 00:04:06,885 Okay, when your house burns down, you get one of these. 88 00:04:06,885 --> 00:04:09,638 Now don't burn your house down. 89 00:04:10,509 --> 00:04:13,421 - How lucky is reuben? - So lucky. 90 00:04:13,421 --> 00:04:16,535 You know what? I say we take this thing out and see how she flies. 91 00:04:16,545 --> 00:04:18,406 I don't know. My mom got it for reuben. 92 00:04:18,426 --> 00:04:21,279 Oh, so now he won't even share his toys? 93 00:04:21,309 --> 00:04:23,271 - He never does. - Screw that guy! 94 00:04:23,271 --> 00:04:25,123 Yeah! 95 00:04:25,143 --> 00:04:26,725 You're a terrible influence. 96 00:04:26,745 --> 00:04:28,747 You need me. 97 00:04:29,598 --> 00:04:32,711 Claire, in case you want to add something, 98 00:04:32,731 --> 00:04:36,645 I put the box of dresses outside and this is the box of snicker snackers. 99 00:04:36,675 --> 00:04:39,317 Mm. Thanks. 100 00:04:39,357 --> 00:04:45,273 Mitchell, we did have something to add to this box of, um... Snicker snackers. 101 00:04:45,273 --> 00:04:47,776 - What? - English is not her first language. 102 00:04:47,796 --> 00:04:48,977 She's just trying to help. 103 00:04:48,977 --> 00:04:51,199 Mitchell, come on. You can't do that. 104 00:04:51,199 --> 00:04:53,131 You can't just change the rules. 105 00:04:53,131 --> 00:04:54,352 This is what we do. 106 00:04:54,372 --> 00:04:57,726 When gloria says something silly, we innocently laugh behind her back. 107 00:04:57,766 --> 00:04:59,337 She's had a rough week, all right? 108 00:04:59,337 --> 00:05:02,020 She's really worried about tia maria cecilia and that surgery. 109 00:05:02,050 --> 00:05:04,412 Oh, and then she lost her cell phone at pilates. 110 00:05:04,452 --> 00:05:06,434 - How do you know this? - We have coffee. 111 00:05:06,454 --> 00:05:09,608 Oh. Have? So when did this become, like,a thing? 112 00:05:09,638 --> 00:05:12,781 What's the big deal? We're friends. I like gloria. 113 00:05:12,791 --> 00:05:15,193 Uh, it's no big deal. 114 00:05:15,193 --> 00:05:18,086 I have nothing against her,I just think-oh! 115 00:05:20,849 --> 00:05:24,833 All right. So before you get all judge-y,I gave her that vase. 116 00:05:25,023 --> 00:05:27,325 After I gave it to you. 117 00:05:30,939 --> 00:05:32,821 You couldn't part with that t-shirt? 118 00:05:32,841 --> 00:05:34,282 I love this shirt. 119 00:05:34,282 --> 00:05:36,585 You know, you don't have to look the way you look. 120 00:05:36,605 --> 00:05:38,707 Amber rand lost all her clothes in a fire, 121 00:05:38,737 --> 00:05:41,800 but she gets to build herself a new wardrobe. 122 00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:43,321 Let me burn your clothes. 123 00:05:43,331 --> 00:05:45,524 Girls, get down here. There's a lot of work to do. 124 00:05:45,554 --> 00:05:48,807 - She's in a mood. - You know what we have to do, right? 125 00:05:48,827 --> 00:05:51,740 - There's no way you're my real sister! - I hate you! 126 00:05:51,740 --> 00:05:54,112 okay, that's it! I cannot take the fighting! 127 00:05:54,112 --> 00:05:56,565 Just get out of the house. 128 00:05:56,585 --> 00:05:59,177 Works every time. 129 00:05:59,197 --> 00:06:00,619 You know,I don't even wanna drive the truck anymore 130 00:06:00,639 --> 00:06:04,483 - even though on the farm I was... - I can't take another farm story. 131 00:06:04,513 --> 00:06:06,224 You might wanna take someone with you. 132 00:06:06,254 --> 00:06:07,826 The thing's been parked there six months. 133 00:06:07,826 --> 00:06:10,489 You're gonna want to hose it down, sweep for spiders. 134 00:06:10,519 --> 00:06:13,301 Good news, girls. You're going with uncle cam. 135 00:06:16,064 --> 00:06:19,568 The pain must have been pretty bad if I was asking phil for help. 136 00:06:19,568 --> 00:06:22,230 His need for my approval is exhausting. 137 00:06:22,250 --> 00:06:27,215 In ten years,I've asked him for one thing - To hook up my wireless printer. 138 00:06:27,235 --> 00:06:29,698 He still won't shut up about it. 139 00:06:29,718 --> 00:06:32,621 How's that printer working out for you? 140 00:06:33,972 --> 00:06:36,104 still loving that printer, eh? 141 00:06:36,124 --> 00:06:38,266 You know, if your printer breaks from here,I can fix it on my phone. 142 00:06:38,316 --> 00:06:43,031 - Can you? - I can, but I don't need to, because I fixed it forever. 143 00:06:43,051 --> 00:06:47,526 Just once,I wish he wouldn't make such a big deal about everything. 144 00:06:49,037 --> 00:06:50,809 Okay. 145 00:06:50,819 --> 00:06:54,833 Now just disrobe and place the towel over your buttocks. 146 00:07:01,820 --> 00:07:04,673 Riding the open road in a big rig like this sure 147 00:07:04,693 --> 00:07:07,756 can work up a man's powerful appetite. 148 00:07:07,756 --> 00:07:09,117 We've gone five blocks. 149 00:07:09,117 --> 00:07:11,459 - Do you want a burger or not? - I could eat. 150 00:07:11,490 --> 00:07:14,713 Hey,alex, maybe uncle cam will let you borrow his hat later. 151 00:07:14,733 --> 00:07:16,374 You know, since you dress like a dude. 152 00:07:16,374 --> 00:07:18,046 I like the way I dress. 153 00:07:18,056 --> 00:07:22,701 Uncle cam, as her future prom date, will you please talk to her? You know fashion. 154 00:07:22,721 --> 00:07:24,963 First of all, you're each beautiful in your own way, 155 00:07:24,973 --> 00:07:28,196 but you're both playing for second, because I'm too sexy for... This truck. 156 00:07:28,216 --> 00:07:30,769 I have to say, you do drive it surprisingly well. 157 00:07:30,789 --> 00:07:32,921 Yeah, who would have thought? 158 00:07:32,921 --> 00:07:34,412 Surprising? 159 00:07:34,422 --> 00:07:36,795 What, that-that a gay man can drive a truck? 160 00:07:36,815 --> 00:07:40,388 You know,I expect that kind of thinking from jay's generation. 161 00:07:40,418 --> 00:07:44,072 But from our future generation? no. 162 00:07:44,102 --> 00:07:46,274 This place got crowded. 163 00:07:46,294 --> 00:07:48,597 Whoa. You're really wedged in there. 164 00:07:48,597 --> 00:07:51,159 You want us to help guide you out? 165 00:07:51,239 --> 00:07:55,363 That question - It was like a hate crime. 166 00:08:00,458 --> 00:08:02,080 Sorry! 167 00:08:02,090 --> 00:08:05,083 - Hey, you're really close on this side. - Yeah,I see it. 168 00:08:05,113 --> 00:08:07,516 - Careful! - I'm being careful. 169 00:08:10,318 --> 00:08:12,921 Gasping? Really? 170 00:08:15,664 --> 00:08:18,577 Holding hands? We're not in a nosedive. 171 00:08:19,848 --> 00:08:22,260 Okay, you know what, if it would make you feel better, get out and guide me. 172 00:08:22,270 --> 00:08:24,442 Okay, come on. Let's go. 173 00:08:24,442 --> 00:08:26,955 Please don't yell at me, but there's not enough room. 174 00:08:26,965 --> 00:08:29,538 Okay, climb over. 175 00:08:33,492 --> 00:08:35,614 You're fine. 176 00:08:40,118 --> 00:08:45,263 You know, the native americans believe that burning sage kept bad energy away. 177 00:08:45,283 --> 00:08:47,335 How'd that work out for 'em? 178 00:08:47,355 --> 00:08:49,207 Get to the back. 179 00:08:49,227 --> 00:08:51,960 That's the spirit. 180 00:08:51,980 --> 00:08:53,451 Thank you. 181 00:08:53,472 --> 00:08:58,326 I just need to make sure that the oil is a perfect 98.6. 182 00:09:00,559 --> 00:09:03,321 And it is perfect. 183 00:09:03,902 --> 00:09:06,965 Now I want you to take a deep breath 184 00:09:06,995 --> 00:09:12,711 and let me transport you to a land I call relaxistan. 185 00:09:12,711 --> 00:09:15,093 Oh, what the hell? Get off me. 186 00:09:15,093 --> 00:09:20,889 I knew this was a terrible... Oh, mama lucian, that's good. 187 00:09:28,166 --> 00:09:29,608 So you wanna try it? 188 00:09:29,638 --> 00:09:31,600 I don't know. I'm still feeling guilty. 189 00:09:31,620 --> 00:09:33,151 It's reuben's helicopter. 190 00:09:33,171 --> 00:09:36,214 Reuben is the whole reason we should be doing this. 191 00:09:36,214 --> 00:09:40,018 He's barely living proof that life can change in a second. 192 00:09:40,048 --> 00:09:43,331 You gotta grab what you can when you can. 193 00:09:43,361 --> 00:09:46,094 What is this hold you have on me? 194 00:09:48,076 --> 00:09:49,217 Okay, now ease up. 195 00:09:49,237 --> 00:09:51,700 Okay,I'm easing up. Okay, it's not working. 196 00:09:51,720 --> 00:09:54,202 Get ahold of yourself, manny! She's getting away! 197 00:09:54,202 --> 00:09:55,914 - I can't,I... I can't hold her! - Give it to me! 198 00:09:55,914 --> 00:09:58,446 Mayday! Mayday! 199 00:10:00,468 --> 00:10:01,610 Oh, well. 200 00:10:01,610 --> 00:10:03,572 What do you mean "oh, well"? My mom's gonna kill us. 201 00:10:03,582 --> 00:10:05,423 Us? You were flying it. 202 00:10:05,433 --> 00:10:07,175 I was in the attic packing boxes. 203 00:10:07,175 --> 00:10:10,809 You're gonna help me find it, or the next search will be for you. 204 00:10:10,839 --> 00:10:14,192 I like this guy. Where's he been? 205 00:10:15,113 --> 00:10:17,476 Just relax. 206 00:10:17,506 --> 00:10:19,047 Let me know if I'm hurting you. 207 00:10:19,047 --> 00:10:22,450 Are you kidding me? It's fantastic. 208 00:10:22,471 --> 00:10:27,435 I love you. This! I love this! 209 00:10:27,455 --> 00:10:28,927 it just slipped out. 210 00:10:28,957 --> 00:10:30,799 Those are the worst three words I could say to phil. 211 00:10:30,809 --> 00:10:34,162 I was just praying he would let it go and not make a big deal about it. 212 00:10:34,172 --> 00:10:36,695 Oh, my god. 213 00:10:36,715 --> 00:10:42,080 This is huge. Jay,I'm sorry. I need a minute. 214 00:10:42,821 --> 00:10:49,217 Son of a bitch! 215 00:10:49,768 --> 00:10:52,320 Oh, these are fantastic. Why is manny getting rid of them? 216 00:10:52,350 --> 00:10:53,922 He said that they were last season. 217 00:10:53,932 --> 00:10:56,605 I used to have a pair like these. I can never find 'em anymore. 218 00:10:56,635 --> 00:10:58,436 Oh, there's an outlet store. 219 00:10:58,466 --> 00:10:59,718 They don't have men's size, 220 00:10:59,738 --> 00:11:02,851 but I'm sure the biggest size for boys would fit you perfectly. 221 00:11:02,881 --> 00:11:04,863 - I'll take you. - All right. It's a date. 222 00:11:04,863 --> 00:11:07,265 Oh. Another date. 223 00:11:07,305 --> 00:11:09,197 Claire,I heard what happened with the vase, 224 00:11:09,197 --> 00:11:11,930 but I don't want you to worry about it. 225 00:11:11,950 --> 00:11:14,533 I'm so sorry. I should have told you about that sooner. 226 00:11:14,553 --> 00:11:18,637 It just-I have really been shaken by this whole fire thing. 227 00:11:18,647 --> 00:11:21,259 You know, life is so fragile. 228 00:11:21,269 --> 00:11:24,663 I know, like a vase. 229 00:11:27,405 --> 00:11:29,167 You tattled on me? 230 00:11:29,167 --> 00:11:32,220 she asked me about it. What was I supposed to do? 231 00:11:35,714 --> 00:11:37,866 Why are you making those cruel sounds with your mouth? 232 00:11:37,866 --> 00:11:39,488 You don't see it? 233 00:11:39,508 --> 00:11:42,060 You're turning gloria into mom. 234 00:11:42,090 --> 00:11:43,131 What? 235 00:11:43,131 --> 00:11:46,414 First you got all defensive of her, and then you tattled on me to her. 236 00:11:46,414 --> 00:11:48,016 That's exactly what you did with old mom. 237 00:11:48,016 --> 00:11:49,177 It's what you're doing with new mom. 238 00:11:49,187 --> 00:11:52,731 Okay, okay. Only you could make my friendship with gloria into something ugly. 239 00:11:52,731 --> 00:11:54,603 Don't get me wrong. I think it's sweet. 240 00:11:54,603 --> 00:11:57,085 We've all got our thing. You have mommy issues. 241 00:11:57,085 --> 00:11:59,287 I do not have mommy issues! 242 00:11:59,297 --> 00:12:03,271 Okay. So I pick you up tomorrow, we go get you your big boy pants, 243 00:12:03,291 --> 00:12:06,655 and then we go and get a little ice cream, okay? 244 00:12:07,435 --> 00:12:09,608 Perfect. 245 00:12:09,608 --> 00:12:11,930 I don't wanna hear it. 246 00:12:12,180 --> 00:12:14,132 hi. 247 00:12:14,172 --> 00:12:15,824 You still don't feel very good? 248 00:12:15,824 --> 00:12:18,527 I told phil I loved him. It was an accident. 249 00:12:18,537 --> 00:12:20,839 - You know how he gets with that stuff. - Ay,I know. 250 00:12:20,869 --> 00:12:23,742 Jay, can I talk to you later about what just happened? 251 00:12:23,752 --> 00:12:25,153 Yeah. Thanks. 252 00:12:25,163 --> 00:12:27,916 Jeez,I just worked that out. 253 00:12:29,147 --> 00:12:31,349 You're screwed. 254 00:12:31,389 --> 00:12:34,853 Today is the biggest day of my life. 255 00:12:34,873 --> 00:12:37,395 Just relax. 256 00:12:37,405 --> 00:12:39,277 Let me know if I'm hurting you. 257 00:12:39,307 --> 00:12:41,459 Are you kidding me? It's fantastic. 258 00:12:41,470 --> 00:12:45,864 I love you. This! I love this! 259 00:12:45,884 --> 00:12:49,738 oh, my god. This is huge. 260 00:12:49,768 --> 00:12:53,151 Jay,I'm sorry. I need a minute. 261 00:12:53,161 --> 00:12:55,123 The two guys who left the firm asked me to quit my job 262 00:12:55,153 --> 00:12:56,985 and partner with them at the new agency. 263 00:12:56,995 --> 00:13:03,151 Big opportunity, big risk, and they need an answer by the end of the day. 264 00:13:03,411 --> 00:13:06,895 I don't always make great decisions under pressure. 265 00:13:06,985 --> 00:13:08,306 What the hell is that? 266 00:13:08,306 --> 00:13:11,429 An alpaca. I got the last one. 267 00:13:13,211 --> 00:13:14,983 Come on! Move that truck! 268 00:13:15,003 --> 00:13:16,715 I hate you! 269 00:13:16,735 --> 00:13:20,739 okay, so... I flirted with a table of truckers who have offered to help us. 270 00:13:20,739 --> 00:13:23,572 No! No help! I've come too far! 271 00:13:23,572 --> 00:13:24,773 Have you? 272 00:13:24,783 --> 00:13:26,765 Oh, hey! They don't sell pizzas at this restaurant! 273 00:13:26,785 --> 00:13:28,156 You parked here illegally! 274 00:13:28,166 --> 00:13:31,199 Congratulations, sir. You're destroying america. 275 00:13:31,219 --> 00:13:34,713 Hey, there are no cars behind us. Go! Gun it! 276 00:13:37,986 --> 00:13:40,468 All right! All right! Everybody relax! 277 00:13:40,479 --> 00:13:41,720 We're fine! We're fine! 278 00:13:41,720 --> 00:13:43,642 - We are not fine! - And we're all smooshed! 279 00:13:43,652 --> 00:13:46,104 - And we're scared! - And we're tilted at a 30 degree angle! 280 00:13:46,104 --> 00:13:48,687 Nerd! And we're dirty and tired and late! 281 00:13:48,687 --> 00:13:50,468 Okay! Can you please just be quiet! 282 00:13:50,479 --> 00:13:52,110 Why couldn't we have just asked for help? 283 00:13:52,110 --> 00:13:53,992 'cause I'm teaching you girls a very valuable lesson- 284 00:13:53,992 --> 00:13:56,284 That gay men can do anything straight men can do. 285 00:13:56,284 --> 00:13:59,447 Yeah, we know that. Do you think you're the only gay guy that we know? 286 00:13:59,447 --> 00:14:01,960 - Yeah. My soccer coach is gay... - Our pediatrician... 287 00:14:01,980 --> 00:14:04,603 - My latin tutor. - Nerd! Our electrician. 288 00:14:04,613 --> 00:14:06,945 Well, then why were you so surprised when I said I could drive a truck? 289 00:14:06,955 --> 00:14:08,557 Not because you're gay, because you're you. 290 00:14:08,567 --> 00:14:10,178 And by the way, you can't. 291 00:14:10,178 --> 00:14:13,502 Okay, wow. I guess I owe you an apology. I made a leap there. 292 00:14:13,532 --> 00:14:16,384 I'm just used to dealing with stereotypes. I'm a little sensitive about it. 293 00:14:16,384 --> 00:14:19,938 Oh! There's the trucker that I talked to. Hey! Excuse me! Hi! 294 00:14:19,948 --> 00:14:21,730 Could you give us a hand, please? 295 00:14:21,750 --> 00:14:23,792 Sure thing, sweetie. 296 00:14:23,812 --> 00:14:26,485 Oh, like she'll be able to help us. 297 00:14:29,568 --> 00:14:32,120 Boy, do you have the right idea. 298 00:14:32,370 --> 00:14:36,485 Could use a little break from the mother and child reunion going on down there. 299 00:14:36,505 --> 00:14:38,807 Don't ask. 300 00:14:40,949 --> 00:14:44,322 Mitchell's turning gloria into mom. Bam! It's out. 301 00:14:44,813 --> 00:14:46,495 You remember the way mom and mitchell 302 00:14:46,505 --> 00:14:50,559 used to be in their private little club, just the two of them, 303 00:14:50,569 --> 00:14:52,330 and no one else allowed in. 304 00:14:52,330 --> 00:14:58,396 Well... It's happening again, but this time around, 305 00:14:58,396 --> 00:15:01,439 it's happening with your wife. 306 00:15:01,459 --> 00:15:04,012 You should see them down there. 307 00:15:04,122 --> 00:15:07,425 It would actually be adorable if it weren't so sick. 308 00:15:07,676 --> 00:15:12,450 I just - You know,I feel like mitchell is a grown man, 309 00:15:12,471 --> 00:15:19,267 he has a child, and he's still working out some psychodrama from 20 years ago. 310 00:15:19,457 --> 00:15:22,821 Daddy, can I have a sip of your beer, please? 311 00:15:25,924 --> 00:15:29,307 Oh, my god. 312 00:15:30,118 --> 00:15:33,301 Mitchell cozies up to mom,I go running to daddy. 313 00:15:33,321 --> 00:15:36,014 I'm the one who's turning gloria into mom, 314 00:15:36,064 --> 00:15:39,538 which is really disturbing since we're the same age. 315 00:15:39,578 --> 00:15:41,580 You're older. 316 00:15:41,600 --> 00:15:44,653 Oh, that's where we're gonna chime in? 317 00:15:44,793 --> 00:15:46,585 Will you hurry up? 318 00:15:46,585 --> 00:15:47,926 I'm saving my strength because 319 00:15:47,926 --> 00:15:50,779 if we don't find this helicopter,I'm walking to canada. 320 00:15:50,799 --> 00:15:52,891 Hope you like taxes. 321 00:15:52,911 --> 00:15:55,233 Hey! That's our helicopter! 322 00:15:55,253 --> 00:15:58,416 Is it, now? I'm sure you have the proper documentation for that. 323 00:15:58,436 --> 00:16:00,318 Just give it back. It's ours. 324 00:16:00,328 --> 00:16:01,389 You guys are bullies. 325 00:16:01,389 --> 00:16:03,401 They can't be bullies. They're nerds. 326 00:16:03,401 --> 00:16:05,904 Don't pigeonhole us. We can be both. 327 00:16:09,297 --> 00:16:13,572 - Is there an issue here? - Uncle cam,I got this. 328 00:16:17,566 --> 00:16:19,968 - Oh, my god, it's alex dunphy. - So awesome. 329 00:16:19,978 --> 00:16:21,590 Problem here, boys? 330 00:16:21,620 --> 00:16:25,233 These geeks won't give us back our helicopter that we took from reuben. 331 00:16:25,263 --> 00:16:26,615 Is that right, abraham? 332 00:16:26,645 --> 00:16:28,236 Oh, my god. She knows your name. 333 00:16:28,246 --> 00:16:30,939 Helicopter, please. 334 00:16:35,924 --> 00:16:37,566 I love you. 335 00:16:37,586 --> 00:16:39,007 What just happened? 336 00:16:39,027 --> 00:16:41,950 You have your fans,I have mine. 337 00:16:41,970 --> 00:16:45,914 Some day, your fans are going to work for my fans. 338 00:16:49,578 --> 00:16:52,901 Oh,um,gloria, do you mind if I talk to mitchell alone for a minute? 339 00:16:52,901 --> 00:16:56,475 It's okay. I already know what you said, and I think it's crazy. 340 00:16:56,495 --> 00:16:58,436 Mitchell is not making me his mommy. 341 00:16:58,446 --> 00:17:01,920 No,I know. He's not, but I think that I might be. 342 00:17:01,940 --> 00:17:06,394 Okay, now you're going really, really crazy, because I am younger than you. 343 00:17:06,414 --> 00:17:09,548 Mm, by 14 months, so let's settle down. 344 00:17:09,548 --> 00:17:11,399 What is going on with you today? 345 00:17:11,409 --> 00:17:15,213 I... All right,I'm working this out as I go. 346 00:17:16,214 --> 00:17:20,148 I think maybe seeing you get all buddy-buddy today with gloria 347 00:17:20,158 --> 00:17:24,322 made me feel like it did when you were with mom, and-and... 348 00:17:25,874 --> 00:17:28,406 I don't know. I-I felt like the odd man out. 349 00:17:28,406 --> 00:17:31,459 Okay. Well, that-that's how I used to feel with you and dad. 350 00:17:31,480 --> 00:17:38,186 I know. I know. We-we chose teams, even during the divorce. 351 00:17:39,027 --> 00:17:43,752 Okay, the last couple years, you and I have been our own team. 352 00:17:43,772 --> 00:17:46,955 You know? And I don't want that to go away. 353 00:17:47,325 --> 00:17:51,059 So... I guess I just felt a little left out today. 354 00:17:51,069 --> 00:17:53,451 Shut up. 355 00:17:54,863 --> 00:17:56,695 Okay, can you two try hugging a box 356 00:17:56,715 --> 00:17:59,828 so that your poor mother doesn't have to do all the hard work? 357 00:17:59,828 --> 00:18:02,491 I am sorry,gloria, about all the mom stuff today. 358 00:18:02,511 --> 00:18:06,765 I just-I got this crazy idea that you liked mitchell better than me. 359 00:18:06,765 --> 00:18:09,217 I do like mitchell better than you. 360 00:18:09,227 --> 00:18:11,079 - What? - Ay, please. 361 00:18:11,079 --> 00:18:15,233 Are you going to honestly tell me that I'm your favorite person in this family? 362 00:18:15,263 --> 00:18:17,966 I'm not even your favorite colombian in this family. 363 00:18:17,986 --> 00:18:20,178 I would love to get closer to you. 364 00:18:20,198 --> 00:18:21,880 You have my number. 365 00:18:21,890 --> 00:18:25,223 But call me quickly because I book up. 366 00:18:26,775 --> 00:18:28,937 You never saw me. 367 00:18:32,060 --> 00:18:34,523 There you are. I really need to talk to you. 368 00:18:34,553 --> 00:18:36,995 - You really don't. - Jay, please. It's about work. 369 00:18:37,015 --> 00:18:38,617 I got a text during your massage. 370 00:18:38,617 --> 00:18:41,740 I've been offered a partnership in a new agency. 371 00:18:44,112 --> 00:18:45,173 Good for you! 372 00:18:45,193 --> 00:18:46,635 I'm not so sure. 373 00:18:46,665 --> 00:18:50,298 I mean, there's-there's a big upside, but I have a stable job right now. 374 00:18:50,559 --> 00:18:53,371 I have three kids, and at least one of them's going to college. 375 00:18:53,411 --> 00:18:55,564 Worse case scenario, they all go. 376 00:18:55,584 --> 00:18:58,056 Well, what does claire think? 377 00:18:58,777 --> 00:19:01,550 I haven't told her yet. I wanted to talk to you first. 378 00:19:01,570 --> 00:19:03,061 You've done this. 379 00:19:03,081 --> 00:19:06,765 Well,I think that there's only really one question. 380 00:19:06,785 --> 00:19:08,336 Whether I'm ready to run my own company? 381 00:19:08,356 --> 00:19:10,468 Ah, you're great with people. 382 00:19:10,489 --> 00:19:11,710 We know you're a good salesman. 383 00:19:11,750 --> 00:19:14,733 You've managed to provide a good living in tough times. 384 00:19:14,753 --> 00:19:16,094 Then what? Is this the right time? 385 00:19:16,124 --> 00:19:18,857 Never a perfect time. House could burn down tomorrow. 386 00:19:18,907 --> 00:19:22,841 Question is, do you want this? 387 00:19:23,121 --> 00:19:26,084 Yeah. Yeah,I really want it. 388 00:19:26,084 --> 00:19:28,497 Then gamble on yourself. 389 00:19:29,498 --> 00:19:32,220 I'd gamble on you. 390 00:19:33,622 --> 00:19:36,034 - I'm gonna do it. - There you go! 391 00:19:36,725 --> 00:19:38,066 Thanks, jay. 392 00:19:38,096 --> 00:19:40,489 Hey, look,I know you were reluctant to get that massage, 393 00:19:40,489 --> 00:19:43,942 but I think we can both agree it had a happy ending. 394 00:19:44,893 --> 00:19:46,485 Please don't say that. 395 00:19:46,485 --> 00:19:49,948 If I could only save one possession in a fire, 396 00:19:50,008 --> 00:19:53,922 probably my first set of golf clubs. My old man gave 'em to me. 397 00:19:56,805 --> 00:20:00,679 The engagement ring that jay gave me that changed my life. 398 00:20:00,909 --> 00:20:02,851 Lily's adoption papers. 399 00:20:02,861 --> 00:20:04,432 I was gonna say adoption papers. 400 00:20:04,452 --> 00:20:08,577 So I guess, then,I would say my mom's recipe book. 401 00:20:09,558 --> 00:20:15,584 All our family photos... Which I keep on my ipad, so my ipad. 402 00:20:15,724 --> 00:20:18,527 As long as I have my family,I wouldn't need anything else. 403 00:20:18,537 --> 00:20:20,859 - Aw, man! Come on! - What? 404 00:20:20,879 --> 00:20:23,642 You say something like that, it makes us all seem petty. 405 00:20:23,662 --> 00:20:26,304 Yeah. Well... I know. 406 00:20:36,084 --> 00:20:37,596 Cam's sleeping. I don't wanna wake him. 407 00:20:37,596 --> 00:20:40,849 - He's had a rough day. - Not as rough as grandpa's truck. 408 00:20:42,831 --> 00:20:44,092 Thank you so much for driving me. 409 00:20:44,102 --> 00:20:46,154 I really didn't want to ride in that big rig. 410 00:20:46,184 --> 00:20:48,176 It was amazing. Everybody was honking, 411 00:20:48,176 --> 00:20:52,851 and I learned,like, five new curse words. Mostly from cam. 412 00:20:52,861 --> 00:20:57,125 Oh,I'm glad I could give you a laugh today. A big joke... 413 00:20:57,145 --> 00:20:59,097 No honey, it was not like that. 414 00:20:59,107 --> 00:21:00,148 - No... - Uncle Cam we really love you. 415 00:21:00,148 --> 00:21:02,841 Save it,I am going to bed. 416 00:21:04,953 --> 00:21:08,246 - So he is still doing that? - Yeah, we are working on it... 417 00:21:08,517 --> 00:21:10,358 - =http://bbs.sfile2012. com=- - =http://ytet. org=- Proudly Presents 418 00:21:10,378 --> 00:21:13,461 - =http://bbs.sfile2012. com=- - =http://ytet. org=- É­Æo°®ÂüÄá 419 00:21:13,492 --> 00:21:15,774 Modern Family Season 3 Episode 08