1
00:00:04,400 --> 00:00:06,690
Whoa. What's all this?

2
00:00:06,730 --> 00:00:08,250
Mom heard us say we were bored.

3
00:00:08,280 --> 00:00:09,680
Suckers.

4
00:00:09,720 --> 00:00:11,180
She heard us from outside.

5
00:00:11,220 --> 00:00:13,730
She has super good
hearing, like a seeing eye dog.

6
00:00:13,770 --> 00:00:16,730
They have overdeveloped hearing
to make up for the fact that-

7
00:00:16,920 --> 00:00:19,220
Wait, the dogs aren't blind.

8
00:00:19,260 --> 00:00:21,230
Wait. Are they?

9
00:00:21,270 --> 00:00:23,670
No, that wouldn't make sense.

10
00:00:23,710 --> 00:00:24,800
You're right.

11
00:00:24,840 --> 00:00:27,410
If I wait long enough, she
can get there by herself.

12
00:00:27,670 --> 00:00:32,010
Quick, girls
- Famous danny from "moonstruck." Aiello?

13
00:00:32,050 --> 00:00:33,560
Hey, phil. I'm glad I caught ya.

14
00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:34,770
What's up?

15
00:00:34,810 --> 00:00:36,530
Uh, it's about steven and stefan.

16
00:00:36,570 --> 00:00:38,340
They wanna see that
house on briar again.

17
00:00:38,380 --> 00:00:39,930
Really? I showed it to them five times.

18
00:00:39,970 --> 00:00:41,790
Last time we were there,I
think they got mail.

19
00:00:41,830 --> 00:00:43,090
Yeah,well, that's why I'm calling.

20
00:00:43,130 --> 00:00:45,510
They hate upsetting
people,unless, of course, it's me.

21
00:00:45,550 --> 00:00:48,240
Then they don't mind waking me up
at 7:00 a.m., asking me to call you.

22
00:00:48,280 --> 00:00:50,090
It's no problem. I'm
just hanging around.

23
00:00:50,130 --> 00:00:51,950
Kind of bored, really.

24
00:00:52,030 --> 00:00:53,770
What?

25
00:00:55,170 --> 00:00:56,700
Well, we did our good deed for the day.

26
00:00:56,740 --> 00:00:59,040
Yeah, for the enemy.
Don't they have enough?

27
00:00:59,080 --> 00:01:02,260
It's been about a year since
we decided to adopt a boy.

28
00:01:02,300 --> 00:01:05,830
Meanwhile, our friends steven and stefan
decided that they wanted a baby, too.

29
00:01:05,870 --> 00:01:07,270
Wonder where they got that idea?

30
00:01:07,310 --> 00:01:09,960
well, we're still waiting, but
they already got their kid

31
00:01:10,000 --> 00:01:11,780
because they went through a surrogate.

32
00:01:11,820 --> 00:01:13,560
Which is all they talk about.

33
00:01:13,600 --> 00:01:14,970
Are you gonna keep doing that?

34
00:01:15,010 --> 00:01:16,900
I might.

35
00:01:18,030 --> 00:01:19,060
I have to go show a house.

36
00:01:19,100 --> 00:01:21,720
But first, what was elton john's
sexual orientation in the '70s?

37
00:01:21,760 --> 00:01:22,760
bye.

38
00:01:22,790 --> 00:01:25,130
- You've done that one before.
- And it never gets old.

39
00:01:25,170 --> 00:01:28,060
like the good captain fantastic himself.

40
00:01:28,770 --> 00:01:29,760
Hey,claire, guess what?

41
00:01:29,800 --> 00:01:30,870
I'm sorry, honey,I can't talk right now.

42
00:01:30,910 --> 00:01:32,500
I told bethenny I would
take her to the airport.

43
00:01:32,540 --> 00:01:35,380
I'm late, and she's gonna miss
her flight. Where are my keys?

44
00:01:35,450 --> 00:01:36,750
Why is that chair still here?

45
00:01:36,790 --> 00:01:38,510
I thought you and luke were
gonna put it out on the sidewalk.

46
00:01:38,540 --> 00:01:41,190
So you can't talk unless
it's about my chores?

47
00:01:41,230 --> 00:01:43,970
Why don't you just do it
now, and you won't be so bored?

48
00:01:44,000 --> 00:01:45,700
You heard that?

49
00:01:45,740 --> 00:01:47,760
I hear everything.

50
00:01:50,410 --> 00:01:52,260
That's for me.

51
00:01:53,030 --> 00:01:55,400
Hey, leon. Nice buzz cut.

52
00:01:55,430 --> 00:01:58,130
Yeah, for some people, the
shampoo doesn't work.

53
00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:00,650
It only makes the lice angry.

54
00:02:01,050 --> 00:02:03,040
Nice to see you.

55
00:02:03,380 --> 00:02:05,170
Oh, no. No-oh, god.

56
00:02:05,210 --> 00:02:07,330
Um,alex, do not move.

57
00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:08,720
Haley, clean this up, okay?

58
00:02:08,760 --> 00:02:10,450
Who fills a vase with marbles?

59
00:02:10,490 --> 00:02:12,650
Who doesn't see a vase
filled with marbles?

60
00:02:12,690 --> 00:02:14,740
who wants to hear a
bunch of plates crashing?

61
00:02:14,770 --> 00:02:17,840
Phil! Honey, the girls
need you in the kitchen!

62
00:02:17,880 --> 00:02:20,650
Thanks for the hat, leon.
It kind of tickles.

63
00:02:20,860 --> 00:02:21,880
Phil!

64
00:02:21,920 --> 00:02:24,310
How much electricity do
we need to bring this back?

65
00:02:24,350 --> 00:02:27,470
It's not rocket science. We're
only reanimating a squirrel.

66
00:02:27,510 --> 00:02:29,790
Phil! Now!

67
00:02:29,830 --> 00:02:34,020
- =http://bbs.sfile2012. com=-
- =http://ytet. org=-
Proudly Presents

68
00:02:34,230 --> 00:02:38,580
- =http://bbs.sfile2012. com=-
- =http://ytet. org=-
É­Æo°®ÂüÄá

69
00:02:38,610 --> 00:02:41,030
Modern Family
Season 3 Episode 15

70
00:02:42,820 --> 00:02:44,720
Sounds great. No, hang on.

71
00:02:44,750 --> 00:02:45,970
Gloria, where's manny?

72
00:02:46,010 --> 00:02:48,400
Some neighborhood kids have
invited him to play football.

73
00:02:48,440 --> 00:02:51,760
He said he was taking his
morning constitutional.

74
00:02:51,800 --> 00:02:53,950
He's working on his
go-cart, but he'll be there.

75
00:02:53,980 --> 00:02:55,520
Okay. See you then.

76
00:02:55,560 --> 00:02:57,820
No, manny cannot go and
play with those boys.

77
00:02:57,860 --> 00:03:01,220
Margo is trying to get us theater
tickets for this afternoon.

78
00:03:01,260 --> 00:03:02,850
Gloria, you and manny do enough together.

79
00:03:02,890 --> 00:03:04,960
Let's let him decide.
Where's he walking?

80
00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:07,540
I don't know. But according
to the song he was singing,

81
00:03:07,570 --> 00:03:09,720
he was going to the
sunny side of the street.

82
00:03:09,760 --> 00:03:13,280
I cannot express to you enough
how bad this kid needs football.

83
00:03:13,320 --> 00:03:15,250
Mom! Look what I found!

84
00:03:15,280 --> 00:03:16,800
Number 99!

85
00:03:16,840 --> 00:03:19,420
When manny was 5, we didn't have much.

86
00:03:19,460 --> 00:03:20,580
We were on our own.

87
00:03:20,590 --> 00:03:23,510
So we always dreamed
of winning the lottery.

88
00:03:23,550 --> 00:03:26,040
We figured if we collected
100 lucky heads-up pennies

89
00:03:26,070 --> 00:03:28,370
and bought a ticket with
them, we couldn't lose.

90
00:03:28,410 --> 00:03:32,400
But now I have a wonderful
husband,a beautiful home...

91
00:03:32,440 --> 00:03:35,230
I feel like I already won the lottery.

92
00:03:35,270 --> 00:03:37,190
So I can keep whatever we win?

93
00:03:37,230 --> 00:03:40,430
I think no. I found most of them.

94
00:03:42,890 --> 00:03:44,400
Can you put this in
the jar with the others?

95
00:03:44,440 --> 00:03:45,930
Si.

96
00:03:46,220 --> 00:03:49,700
Ay. I forgot. What is the
combination to your safe?

97
00:03:50,780 --> 00:03:52,200
I'll just come with you.

98
00:03:52,230 --> 00:03:55,710
Oh, yes,'cause that's how this arrangement works
- I take money from you!

99
00:03:58,690 --> 00:03:59,980
hello?

100
00:04:00,020 --> 00:04:02,380
Oh,hi, margo. No, she just ran upstairs.

101
00:04:02,420 --> 00:04:06,430
Listen, about these theater tickets
- Don't knock yourself out trying to...

102
00:04:06,470 --> 00:04:08,220
Oh, you did?

103
00:04:08,260 --> 00:04:11,070
Well, sorry to do this last
minute, but they can't go.

104
00:04:11,110 --> 00:04:13,200
No, manny has a football game, so...

105
00:04:13,240 --> 00:04:16,210
Jay, could you steep my tea?

106
00:04:17,790 --> 00:04:21,460
I cannot express to you enough
how much this kid needs football.

107
00:04:21,500 --> 00:04:25,790
And that is the whole house... Again.

108
00:04:25,860 --> 00:04:28,900
I love it, but I just don't
love it. Do you love it?

109
00:04:28,940 --> 00:04:30,660
I love it. I absolutely love it.

110
00:04:30,690 --> 00:04:32,640
I'm just not sure if
I'm in love with it.

111
00:04:32,680 --> 00:04:34,320
Oh, yeah.

112
00:04:34,360 --> 00:04:35,720
We have an expression
around the office for

113
00:04:35,750 --> 00:04:40,070
when a sale just isn't happening
- Impossible.

114
00:04:40,850 --> 00:04:42,620
Maybe for some people.

115
00:04:42,660 --> 00:04:46,640
Not sure if I mentioned it before, but
the house does come with a hookup

116
00:04:46,680 --> 00:04:48,610
for a european washing machine.

117
00:04:48,650 --> 00:04:50,690
Oh,I love that.

118
00:04:51,540 --> 00:04:53,730
Oh, so sorry.

119
00:04:54,560 --> 00:04:56,470
It's the boss.

120
00:04:57,890 --> 00:04:59,260
Hi. I'm on my way home.

121
00:04:59,300 --> 00:05:01,170
I've been calling haley, but
nobody's answering.

122
00:05:01,210 --> 00:05:02,200
Is everything okay there?

123
00:05:02,240 --> 00:05:04,040
Everything here is great.

124
00:05:04,080 --> 00:05:06,390
Oh, thank god. Did you
put the chair out front?

125
00:05:06,430 --> 00:05:07,420
Not yet.

126
00:05:07,460 --> 00:05:09,130
Honey, you're gonna
miss the trash pickup.

127
00:05:09,170 --> 00:05:10,860
Don't worry. If they don't
take it, someone else will.

128
00:05:10,900 --> 00:05:13,420
Who is gonna pick up that
ratty chair off our lawn?

129
00:05:13,450 --> 00:05:15,240
Are you kidding? It's in great shape.

130
00:05:15,280 --> 00:05:17,760
Super cozy. People are
always commenting on it.

131
00:05:17,790 --> 00:05:19,940
Trust me, it'll be gone
by the end of the day.

132
00:05:19,980 --> 00:05:21,390
Please, just do it now.

133
00:05:21,430 --> 00:05:23,420
I can't. I'm so sorry.

134
00:05:23,460 --> 00:05:25,840
When I'm done with these
clients,I'll call luke and leon.

135
00:05:25,880 --> 00:05:27,620
I know I can talk them into it.

136
00:05:27,660 --> 00:05:29,580
We are not losing this
house to luke and leon.

137
00:05:29,620 --> 00:05:31,520
What do you mean,"call luke and leon"?

138
00:05:31,550 --> 00:05:32,620
Aren't you at home?

139
00:05:32,660 --> 00:05:34,590
No,I left right before you did.

140
00:05:34,620 --> 00:05:39,320
Phil, the house... The-the
kids... Oh,god, the squirrel.

141
00:05:39,360 --> 00:05:41,130
Hello?

142
00:05:41,970 --> 00:05:44,010
We'll take it.

143
00:05:45,010 --> 00:05:48,650
Commission... Accomplished.

144
00:05:50,430 --> 00:05:52,760
So how great is your life right now, huh?

145
00:05:52,800 --> 00:05:57,200
A new house,a new baby, stefan's
propecia's kicking in.

146
00:05:58,460 --> 00:06:01,400
That's him. He's on his
way. He texted "o.m.w."

147
00:06:01,440 --> 00:06:03,470
We try to keep our texts short
when we're driving with the baby.

148
00:06:03,510 --> 00:06:05,990
Oh,well, what wonderful parents you are.

149
00:06:06,170 --> 00:06:08,150
You guys hate us a little bit, don't you?

150
00:06:08,190 --> 00:06:10,260
- No. God, no.
- Just a little.

151
00:06:10,290 --> 00:06:12,000
Have you thought about surrogacy?

152
00:06:12,030 --> 00:06:14,120
At least you'd be making a
baby instead of waiting around

153
00:06:14,150 --> 00:06:16,140
for some pregnant mom to maybe pick you.

154
00:06:16,180 --> 00:06:19,510
Well, we considered it, but how do you
decide which one will-where's lily?

155
00:06:19,550 --> 00:06:21,500
- Sleeping.
- Ice the cupcake.

156
00:06:21,530 --> 00:06:22,990
That you couldn't say in front of lily?

157
00:06:23,030 --> 00:06:25,030
well,then, she'd want a cupcake.

158
00:06:25,070 --> 00:06:26,750
Yeah, well... But that's
the beauty of the swirl.

159
00:06:26,780 --> 00:06:27,830
The swirl?

160
00:06:27,860 --> 00:06:30,460
You both donate, they mix
it up, fertilize the egg.

161
00:06:30,500 --> 00:06:32,570
You never know who the father is.

162
00:06:34,070 --> 00:06:35,690
That's stefan.

163
00:06:36,710 --> 00:06:38,810
Yeah, maybe we should
think about this swirl.

164
00:06:38,850 --> 00:06:40,770
Well,I-I didn't think
surrogacy was for us.

165
00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:42,840
But, you know,'cause one
of us would feel left out.

166
00:06:42,870 --> 00:06:44,880
Yeah, but if you don't
know whose it is...

167
00:06:44,910 --> 00:06:48,710
Sorry we're late. Guys, meet roco.

168
00:06:49,110 --> 00:06:51,600
Roco or cocoa?

169
00:06:54,370 --> 00:06:55,340
Look at him out there.

170
00:06:55,370 --> 00:06:57,840
Oh, ay. This is so exciting.

171
00:07:01,160 --> 00:07:02,510
Go ahead! Attaboy!

172
00:07:02,550 --> 00:07:04,900
- Go! Go ahead! Attaboy!
- Go, manny! Run!

173
00:07:04,940 --> 00:07:07,800
I knew gloria would find out
I lied about those tickets.

174
00:07:07,840 --> 00:07:10,120
But I figured when she
saw manny out there,

175
00:07:10,160 --> 00:07:13,520
playing with all those
other kids, she'd thank me.

176
00:07:14,260 --> 00:07:15,730
That's what I figured.

177
00:07:15,770 --> 00:07:18,320
Go! Go! What the hell's he doing?

178
00:07:18,360 --> 00:07:19,950
Run, manny! Run!

179
00:07:19,990 --> 00:07:21,740
Mom! Number 100!

180
00:07:21,780 --> 00:07:23,760
Now we have the lucky-oh!

181
00:07:35,950 --> 00:07:37,920
Oh, thank god. Nobody's dead.

182
00:07:37,960 --> 00:07:40,550
Or... We're all dead.

183
00:07:40,790 --> 00:07:42,040
How many plates did we lose?

184
00:07:42,070 --> 00:07:45,660
None. Luke and haley used cookie sheets
to clear a path through the marbles for me.

185
00:07:45,700 --> 00:07:47,590
- Where are the marbles?
- Right here.

186
00:07:47,990 --> 00:07:50,940
- Oh, haley!
- I put glue on them so it doesn't happen again.

187
00:07:50,980 --> 00:07:51,870
What about the chair?

188
00:07:51,910 --> 00:07:54,770
Leon and I rolled it
outside on some skateboards.

189
00:07:55,510 --> 00:07:56,810
The squirrel?

190
00:07:56,850 --> 00:07:59,670
You think I was going
to let that happen?

191
00:08:00,260 --> 00:08:02,070
These kids are going to survive.

192
00:08:02,110 --> 00:08:04,640
They are the best of me and phil.

193
00:08:04,680 --> 00:08:09,580
Luke using the skateboards, haley gluing the marbles
- That is pure phil.

194
00:08:09,620 --> 00:08:13,150
Alex keeping everyone in line
- Pure me.

195
00:08:15,260 --> 00:08:18,280
Sometimes I worry no
one's gonna like alex.

196
00:08:21,930 --> 00:08:23,110
There you go, buddy.

197
00:08:23,150 --> 00:08:24,810
Thank you.

198
00:08:26,130 --> 00:08:27,730
What? You need anything? I'll get it.

199
00:08:27,770 --> 00:08:29,440
Steak sauce, but it's okay.

200
00:08:29,480 --> 00:08:31,640
It's probably good
for me to move around.

201
00:08:35,560 --> 00:08:38,620
Oh,jay, it's so nice to see
you take care of him like that.

202
00:08:38,660 --> 00:08:40,490
Why are you surprised? He's our kid.

203
00:08:40,530 --> 00:08:43,200
We take care of each
other in this family.

204
00:08:43,710 --> 00:08:45,790
I want to kill you.

205
00:08:45,820 --> 00:08:47,650
Wild guess-margo?

206
00:08:47,690 --> 00:08:51,090
- Let me explain.
- There is no excuse.

207
00:08:51,160 --> 00:08:53,530
This is something private.
I'm gonna get outta here.

208
00:08:53,570 --> 00:08:55,530
So that's why you were being so nice.

209
00:08:55,560 --> 00:08:59,440
You lied to my friend... You made
manny play the american football...

210
00:08:59,480 --> 00:09:02,670
It is your fault that he got estampeded.

211
00:09:02,710 --> 00:09:04,260
Or is it your fault?

212
00:09:04,290 --> 00:09:06,560
he stopped to pick up
a penny, for god sake.

213
00:09:06,590 --> 00:09:08,250
Be careful what you say, jay.

214
00:09:08,290 --> 00:09:11,170
You're skating on thin
eggshells right now.

215
00:09:11,210 --> 00:09:15,040
I tried to get him out there with kids his
own age... Which is what he should be doing...

216
00:09:15,080 --> 00:09:17,050
And not spending another
afternoon with his mommy.

217
00:09:17,080 --> 00:09:20,650
If you have a problem with the way
manny's being raised, you talk to me!

218
00:09:20,690 --> 00:09:23,160
- I am.
- I don't wanna hear it!

219
00:09:29,590 --> 00:09:31,120
Phil, you really didn't have to do this.

220
00:09:31,160 --> 00:09:33,230
I sold a house today because of you two.

221
00:09:33,260 --> 00:09:34,680
The least I can do is buy you dinner.

222
00:09:34,720 --> 00:09:36,640
I saw that house. It is gorgeous.

223
00:09:36,680 --> 00:09:38,140
- I know.
- Yes, we're real happy for them.

224
00:09:38,180 --> 00:09:39,480
They showed me a picture of the baby.

225
00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:41,120
How adorable is that little guy?

226
00:09:41,160 --> 00:09:43,040
Yes, we're real happy for them.

227
00:09:43,070 --> 00:09:45,710
Okay, you might wanna slow down there.

228
00:09:45,750 --> 00:09:46,970
What? I'm playing a new drinking game.

229
00:09:47,010 --> 00:09:49,490
It's called "every time I'm
depressed,I take a drink."

230
00:09:49,530 --> 00:09:52,280
That game exists.
It's called alcoholism.

231
00:09:52,550 --> 00:09:56,950
Oh,I'm sorry, you're right. I'm...
I'm wallowing, and it's not cute.

232
00:09:56,990 --> 00:09:58,010
To happier things.

233
00:09:58,040 --> 00:10:00,440
- yes.
- To happier things.

234
00:10:01,290 --> 00:10:03,390
I remember the first few drinks...

235
00:10:03,430 --> 00:10:06,920
And,um, after that, the
night's just bits and pieces.

236
00:10:06,960 --> 00:10:11,200
I wanna do something I never do
- Brag about my kids.

237
00:10:11,240 --> 00:10:15,700
Today, they were resourceful, they
were responsible, they...

238
00:10:15,740 --> 00:10:20,100
Put 40% down. It was worth showing
the house five times and waiting...

239
00:10:20,130 --> 00:10:23,900
Almost a year. Seriously!
Who do you have to...

240
00:10:23,940 --> 00:10:27,300
Blow. That's really hot. Why don't you
let it cool down? Try some of the...

241
00:10:27,330 --> 00:10:31,930
Mexican! The baby is clearly
mexican! So, you know, the swirl is out.

242
00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:34,780
Ugh. It's enough to make you lose...

243
00:10:34,820 --> 00:10:37,840
Track. Is this my fourth drink?

244
00:10:37,880 --> 00:10:42,530
It's my fourth. I said "four"
twice, didn't I? I did, didn't I?

245
00:10:42,600 --> 00:10:48,070
I think we're gonna need four
cabs... Two! Two! You made me!

246
00:10:49,030 --> 00:10:52,540
I
- I vaguely remember... Someone crying?

247
00:10:52,570 --> 00:10:55,370
If we ever did surrogacy,I
would want you to be the donor.

248
00:10:55,410 --> 00:10:57,170
You're so smart, you're so handsome.

249
00:10:57,210 --> 00:10:58,570
Oh, stop it! It should be you!

250
00:10:58,610 --> 00:11:02,340
You're so fun! You're so talented!

251
00:11:02,380 --> 00:11:05,800
It's not fair. I love you both so much.

252
00:11:05,840 --> 00:11:08,120
If you could have a baby that
was a mix of the two of you,

253
00:11:08,160 --> 00:11:10,160
I would love that baby so much.

254
00:11:10,190 --> 00:11:12,060
Aw, that is so sweet.

255
00:11:12,090 --> 00:11:15,360
- I meant it.
- That is so sweet.

256
00:11:15,580 --> 00:11:19,110
Oh, my god. You guys, we could
do this. We could do this.

257
00:11:19,150 --> 00:11:24,130
We could make a baby that is
half tucker and half pritchett.

258
00:11:24,260 --> 00:11:26,090
Are you saying what
I think you're saying?

259
00:11:26,120 --> 00:11:26,950
Yeah.

260
00:11:26,990 --> 00:11:30,080
- Cloning?
- No. No.

261
00:11:30,120 --> 00:11:33,040
I'm saying... I give the egg.

262
00:11:34,300 --> 00:11:36,380
I give the egg. That's
the pritchett side.

263
00:11:36,420 --> 00:11:39,620
And then,cam, you're the father, right?

264
00:11:39,650 --> 00:11:42,750
And then we just,like, mix
it and put it in a, like,

265
00:11:42,780 --> 00:11:47,060
a surrogate lady thing, and
then bang! We have a baby.

266
00:11:47,090 --> 00:11:48,950
Oh. Are-are you serious?

267
00:11:48,990 --> 00:11:50,200
You would do that?

268
00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:51,640
I would be honored.

269
00:11:51,680 --> 00:11:55,630
You guys, you guys, if there's
one thing I have learned today,

270
00:11:55,670 --> 00:11:58,160
it's the pleasure of
looking at your children,

271
00:11:58,200 --> 00:12:01,200
and seeing both
- Both of you in there.

272
00:12:01,240 --> 00:12:05,510
And I want you to have
that experience. Yeah.

273
00:12:05,550 --> 00:12:10,100
And something else... Guys,I
make really good babies.

274
00:12:10,140 --> 00:12:12,340
- Yes.
- I have,like, magic eggs or something.

275
00:12:12,380 --> 00:12:13,810
- yes!
- They're golden.

276
00:12:13,840 --> 00:12:18,060
Oh, gosh. Oh, phil,I don't-what
do- What do you say about this?

277
00:12:18,100 --> 00:12:20,410
I think we're all having a baby!

278
00:12:20,450 --> 00:12:22,440
Table hug!

279
00:12:23,590 --> 00:12:27,260
Sweet potato fries!

280
00:12:30,850 --> 00:12:32,970
- What have I done?
- I know.

281
00:12:37,070 --> 00:12:40,930
What was I thinking? I- I-I just get
drunk and I bring a baby into the world?

282
00:12:40,960 --> 00:12:43,090
That would be 4 for 4.

283
00:12:43,290 --> 00:12:44,540
I can't go through with it.

284
00:12:44,580 --> 00:12:47,070
Don't panic. You haven't
donated anything yet.

285
00:12:47,110 --> 00:12:49,600
Besides, what are the
chances your eggs even work?

286
00:12:49,640 --> 00:12:51,940
What are the chances we can
pretend I never said that?

287
00:12:51,970 --> 00:12:54,260
It's weird. It's my brother.

288
00:12:54,290 --> 00:12:57,680
And then there would be this baby over
there that's my baby, but it's not my baby...

289
00:12:57,720 --> 00:12:59,330
That actually sounds
good. Just say that.

290
00:12:59,370 --> 00:13:01,950
We're gonna see him for brunch
in two hours over at your dad's.

291
00:13:01,990 --> 00:13:06,880
Ooh. That seems... Soon and-and hard.

292
00:13:07,380 --> 00:13:10,400
What if... What if I blame it on you?

293
00:13:10,440 --> 00:13:12,910
What if we say that
you're not okay with it?

294
00:13:12,950 --> 00:13:14,290
- no!
- why?

295
00:13:14,320 --> 00:13:17,120
Are you really okay with another
man fertilizing your wife's egg?

296
00:13:17,160 --> 00:13:19,130
- Of course not! That's creepy.
- Yes.

297
00:13:19,130 --> 00:13:21,980
Plus, what if you and cam make
a better baby than we did?

298
00:13:22,020 --> 00:13:25,570
It's settled. Phil says "no."

299
00:13:25,610 --> 00:13:27,930
Like they're really gonna
believe that I overruled you?

300
00:13:27,960 --> 00:13:30,050
- Right.
- Come on.

301
00:13:30,180 --> 00:13:31,970
They're gonna be crushed.

302
00:13:32,010 --> 00:13:34,480
They've waited so long for this baby.

303
00:13:34,510 --> 00:13:36,830
Maybe they're having
second thoughts, too.

304
00:13:37,910 --> 00:13:40,740
Look-this is what my baby
with claire would look like.

305
00:13:40,780 --> 00:13:42,470
What is this? What...

306
00:13:42,540 --> 00:13:45,820
Okay, well,I found a web site where
couples can upload pictures...

307
00:13:45,850 --> 00:13:48,640
Oh. And then it shows them
what their baby would look like.

308
00:13:49,110 --> 00:13:51,540
This is... Gloria and I.

309
00:13:51,580 --> 00:13:53,290
Couldn't resist.

310
00:13:53,330 --> 00:13:55,970
Wow. That
- That looks exactly like manny.

311
00:13:56,010 --> 00:13:58,520
Like-like weirdly so.

312
00:13:58,560 --> 00:13:59,690
What-what's this other picture?

313
00:13:59,730 --> 00:14:01,480
Don't be jealous.

314
00:14:01,520 --> 00:14:05,910
But this... Is me and justin timberlake.

315
00:14:07,210 --> 00:14:08,440
Cam, we have a problem.

316
00:14:08,480 --> 00:14:11,050
Oh, what? You can talk about ryan gosling
all day, but the moment I say something -

317
00:14:11,090 --> 00:14:16,160
no,no,no, about this baby.
I... I don't think I can do it.

318
00:14:16,190 --> 00:14:18,720
What-why?
Why-it's perfect!

319
00:14:18,760 --> 00:14:20,970
It's our chance to have a
baby that's part me, part you!

320
00:14:21,010 --> 00:14:23,400
No, no! It's part you and part claire.

321
00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:24,680
I'm nowhere in there.

322
00:14:24,720 --> 00:14:26,110
And it's not like I can pretend.

323
00:14:26,150 --> 00:14:27,870
It's-she's not some egg
donor that we don't know.

324
00:14:27,900 --> 00:14:29,510
It's claire.

325
00:14:29,550 --> 00:14:30,940
You know, we see her all the time.

326
00:14:30,980 --> 00:14:32,730
And what are we supposed
to tell the baby?

327
00:14:32,770 --> 00:14:34,390
"say hi to your aunt mommy!"

328
00:14:34,430 --> 00:14:38,190
- adorable.
- No, not adorable. Appalachian.

329
00:14:39,060 --> 00:14:41,370
Okay,I'm-I'm sorry, cam.

330
00:14:43,940 --> 00:14:48,700
Jay says that I'm smothering
manny... But I'm just enjoying him.

331
00:14:48,740 --> 00:14:51,350
I mean, they're only gonna
be boys for a short time.

332
00:14:51,380 --> 00:14:54,360
Best time ever in this house!

333
00:14:54,400 --> 00:14:56,070
I'm uncomfortable with this, phil.

334
00:14:56,110 --> 00:14:58,350
The manual specifically
says "no towing."

335
00:14:58,380 --> 00:15:00,340
There are two types of
people in this world-

336
00:15:00,380 --> 00:15:03,010
People who follow the manual, and
people who stick it to the manual.

337
00:15:03,010 --> 00:15:05,560
You... Are hurt.

338
00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:09,400
- Manny, what happened?
- Football injury.

339
00:15:09,440 --> 00:15:11,590
My mom will yell you all about it.

340
00:15:11,630 --> 00:15:13,260
Hola, lily!

341
00:15:13,300 --> 00:15:16,210
does my little princess want a cookie?

342
00:15:16,250 --> 00:15:17,790
Oh,well, you know, maybe just one.

343
00:15:17,830 --> 00:15:19,550
She's already had her
sugar limit for today.

344
00:15:19,580 --> 00:15:22,320
How can you tell?

345
00:15:22,350 --> 00:15:24,200
okay, lily.

346
00:15:24,710 --> 00:15:27,340
Hey, you two. Hey!

347
00:15:27,610 --> 00:15:29,100
So where
- Oh, where are the kids?

348
00:15:29,140 --> 00:15:31,050
Oh, haley's driving them over separately.

349
00:15:31,090 --> 00:15:33,530
oh. Oh! Big girl now.

350
00:15:33,570 --> 00:15:34,870
That's great. Yeah.

351
00:15:34,910 --> 00:15:37,120
- So that was...
- So fun last night.

352
00:15:37,160 --> 00:15:40,420
- So fun.
- Yeah, we had a great night.

353
00:15:40,490 --> 00:15:42,230
Yeah. Yes.

354
00:15:42,270 --> 00:15:44,580
We should
- Jinx!

355
00:15:51,290 --> 00:15:52,830
I cannot tell them.

356
00:15:52,870 --> 00:15:54,750
I cannot break their hearts.

357
00:15:54,790 --> 00:15:57,690
So you're gonna have cam's baby
just to keep things from being weird?

358
00:15:57,720 --> 00:16:00,800
Um, what? You and uncle
cam are having a baby?

359
00:16:00,840 --> 00:16:03,830
Kids, shh. There was a discussion
about the possibility...

360
00:16:03,870 --> 00:16:06,760
Of your mom donating an egg... So
that the guys could have a baby.

361
00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:08,840
But we decided it was not a good idea.

362
00:16:08,870 --> 00:16:10,710
Why? Because lily's such a mess?

363
00:16:10,740 --> 00:16:12,740
For a lot of reasons. They have -

364
00:16:12,780 --> 00:16:15,960
but we can agree that she's
a disastrous human being?

365
00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:17,670
I think it's a great idea.

366
00:16:17,710 --> 00:16:21,750
Yeah. It's a really beautiful
offer, mom. I'm impressed.

367
00:16:21,790 --> 00:16:24,720
Oh, my god. Cam, they
told the kids already,

368
00:16:24,760 --> 00:16:26,910
and they seem to be totally into it.

369
00:16:26,940 --> 00:16:27,930
All right, is it just me?

370
00:16:27,960 --> 00:16:29,360
Am I the only one that
thinks this is weird?

371
00:16:29,400 --> 00:16:32,440
Maybe it's not weird.
Maybe we're pioneers.

372
00:16:32,480 --> 00:16:33,780
Mm, no we're hardly pioneers.

373
00:16:33,820 --> 00:16:35,910
You have three different hair dryers
for different types of weather.

374
00:16:35,950 --> 00:16:38,300
Maybe it's just gonna take some
time to get used to the idea.

375
00:16:38,340 --> 00:16:39,880
- What idea?
- Oh. No.

376
00:16:39,920 --> 00:16:43,160
- Um,well, jay... Claire has...
- cam. No.

377
00:16:43,200 --> 00:16:46,290
I- I-I just don't think my dad's really
ready for this conversation. So...

378
00:16:46,320 --> 00:16:49,360
Oh, stop acting like I'm some
stodgy old coot. I've grown.

379
00:16:49,390 --> 00:16:55,170
Okay. Um,jay, claire has,um, offered
to give us one of her eggs

380
00:16:55,200 --> 00:16:58,520
so we can have a baby that's
half pritchett, half tucker.

381
00:16:58,560 --> 00:17:01,060
That's unnatural. I'm against it.

382
00:17:01,100 --> 00:17:04,800
Oh,surprise, surprise.
Jay is against something.

383
00:17:04,840 --> 00:17:07,240
Cam and claire wanna
have a baby together.

384
00:17:07,930 --> 00:17:09,580
You're not gonna do that.

385
00:17:09,620 --> 00:17:11,040
It's not your decision, dad.

386
00:17:11,080 --> 00:17:12,230
You're not thinking straight.

387
00:17:12,270 --> 00:17:14,510
And you're not in charge.
Okay, claire and I are adults.

388
00:17:14,550 --> 00:17:17,470
If-if we want this to
happen, it-it's gonna happen.

389
00:17:17,540 --> 00:17:19,220
So much for second thoughts.

390
00:17:19,260 --> 00:17:21,100
Young lady,I need to
have a talk with you.

391
00:17:21,140 --> 00:17:23,300
- I don't... Now?
- no.

392
00:17:23,750 --> 00:17:27,030
You don't get to tell everyone
how to live their lives,

393
00:17:27,060 --> 00:17:29,970
that boys cannot spend
time with their mommies

394
00:17:30,010 --> 00:17:32,820
or that brothers and
sisters can't make babies.

395
00:17:32,860 --> 00:17:34,590
- So you're all for this?
- no.

396
00:17:34,630 --> 00:17:37,700
It's a freak show, but
it's their freak show.

397
00:17:38,550 --> 00:17:39,970
So this is happening again?

398
00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:43,020
Well,I'm not gonna not do it
'cause my dad thinks I shouldn't.

399
00:17:43,060 --> 00:17:44,230
You know,I'm not following.

400
00:17:44,270 --> 00:17:46,030
We're not doing it 'cause
I don't want to do it.

401
00:17:46,070 --> 00:17:49,110
What we're not doing is not doing it
'cause he doesn't want us to do it.

402
00:17:49,150 --> 00:17:50,980
Just say baby or no baby.

403
00:17:51,020 --> 00:17:53,640
Isn't it enough this family
spends a lot of time together?

404
00:17:53,680 --> 00:17:55,090
Now we have to inbreed.

405
00:17:55,130 --> 00:17:58,140
Okay,dad, it's not technically
inbreeding. It's, um...

406
00:17:58,170 --> 00:18:01,880
For the record,I think what
my mom is doing is very brave.

407
00:18:01,930 --> 00:18:04,830
I like it. I've always kind of
wanted a half-brother, half-cousin.

408
00:18:04,870 --> 00:18:06,300
Really? "always"?

409
00:18:06,340 --> 00:18:07,380
- But it's not... it's not...
- Well,I mean, if you think about it...

410
00:18:19,880 --> 00:18:22,290
When was the last time
we talked under a table?

411
00:18:22,330 --> 00:18:23,710
Dad and gloria's wedding reception.

412
00:18:23,750 --> 00:18:25,560
Oh, yeah.

413
00:18:25,800 --> 00:18:30,340
Um, mm... I love you. You know
that... But I can't do this.

414
00:18:30,370 --> 00:18:31,770
No,no, neither can I!

415
00:18:31,810 --> 00:18:32,850
- Really?
- Yeah.

416
00:18:32,890 --> 00:18:35,070
Are you serious? You can't-oh, god.

417
00:18:35,110 --> 00:18:38,060
I'm so relieved. I'm
sorry. I- I-I... Ugh.

418
00:18:38,100 --> 00:18:39,970
I am so sorry I led us down this road.

419
00:18:40,010 --> 00:18:41,430
No, no. No,claire, don't be. Don't be.

420
00:18:41,470 --> 00:18:44,860
It was-it was generous and
thoughtful, just like you.

421
00:18:44,900 --> 00:18:48,690
How could I not want those
qualities in my child?

422
00:18:48,720 --> 00:18:50,410
Oh, come here.

423
00:18:50,450 --> 00:18:51,720
So this is really happening?

424
00:18:51,760 --> 00:18:53,020
ah. What if it is, dad?

425
00:18:53,060 --> 00:18:55,140
Yeah. What if we love each
other, and this is a beautiful thing?

426
00:18:55,180 --> 00:18:57,170
Okay, it's our decision.
It's not yours. Yeah.

427
00:18:57,210 --> 00:19:00,190
So baby? No baby?

428
00:19:00,410 --> 00:19:02,540
no.

429
00:19:06,260 --> 00:19:08,020
- You okay?
- Oh, yeah. I'm fine.

430
00:19:08,060 --> 00:19:10,180
Mm,I know it's been hard on you.

431
00:19:10,420 --> 00:19:12,080
Hey, what if we went out
for a nice dinner tonight?

432
00:19:12,110 --> 00:19:13,550
Oh, that'd be fun.
Should I call the sitter?

433
00:19:13,590 --> 00:19:14,940
Yeah. Oh, you know what
I was thinking today?

434
00:19:14,970 --> 00:19:16,190
What about luke?

435
00:19:16,230 --> 00:19:19,400
oh, He's so good with her, the
way he looks at her...

436
00:19:19,480 --> 00:19:23,100
- My god, cam.
- Oh,look, she's organizing her things.

437
00:19:23,130 --> 00:19:25,380
Look at how she's dressed. Oh!

438
00:19:26,680 --> 00:19:29,640
We didn't make her, but she sure is us.

439
00:19:29,680 --> 00:19:32,320
Hey,lily,honey, it might make
more sense with the shoes...

440
00:19:32,360 --> 00:19:33,880
Mitchell.

441
00:19:35,920 --> 00:19:37,010
I like what she did with the dolls-

442
00:19:37,050 --> 00:19:40,300
Play as you will. Play as you will.

443
00:19:42,480 --> 00:19:44,000
The big one, remember?

444
00:19:44,040 --> 00:19:45,520
One of the first ones we found.

445
00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:47,190
It was at the bottom of
the gutter in the street.

446
00:19:47,230 --> 00:19:51,320
Ay, yes. We put the gum at the
bottom of your walking stick.

447
00:19:51,360 --> 00:19:53,090
Ay, look at this one
- The green one,

448
00:19:53,130 --> 00:19:55,510
the one we found at
the floor of my taxi.

449
00:19:55,550 --> 00:19:57,590
Your taxi? Yes.

450
00:19:57,630 --> 00:19:59,960
Before I had somebody
running my life for me,

451
00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:02,080
I used to drive a taxi at night.

452
00:20:02,120 --> 00:20:04,600
Manny would sleep in
the seat next to me.

453
00:20:04,640 --> 00:20:06,590
One time,I had to hit the brakes so hard

454
00:20:06,630 --> 00:20:09,770
that he fell into the floor
and he found the penny.

455
00:20:09,810 --> 00:20:11,600
Pretty lucky, huh?

456
00:20:11,640 --> 00:20:15,190
Eight years. I can't
believe we're finally done.

457
00:20:16,080 --> 00:20:17,480
Me, either.

458
00:20:17,510 --> 00:20:20,570
Come. Let's go get your lottery ticket.

459
00:20:27,200 --> 00:20:29,960
Gloria. I think you made a mistake here.

460
00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:31,240
What did I do now?

461
00:20:31,270 --> 00:20:34,310
I counted these, and
you've only got 96 pennies.

462
00:20:34,350 --> 00:20:35,910
Are you sure?

463
00:20:35,940 --> 00:20:37,660
Afraid so.

464
00:20:37,700 --> 00:20:40,340
I guess you're gonna
have to keep lookin'.

465
00:20:40,380 --> 00:20:42,480
Dang it! I counted those.

466
00:20:42,520 --> 00:20:45,120
See for yourself.

467
00:20:52,210 --> 00:20:54,640
And now we upload your picture.

468
00:20:54,720 --> 00:20:56,720
This is fun. This is fun. Yeah.

469
00:20:56,750 --> 00:20:59,710
And in just a few short moments, thanks
to the magic of technology...

470
00:20:59,750 --> 00:21:00,910
We'll know what our
baby actually looks-

471
00:21:00,950 --> 00:21:03,190
- Oh! No!
- What happened? What is that?

472
00:21:03,220 --> 00:21:04,610
did you put one of us in upside-down?

473
00:21:04,650 --> 00:21:07,350
No! That's actually- Okay,I-I
don't want to see this anymore.

474
00:21:07,390 --> 00:21:08,340
ohh. Turn it off.

475
00:21:08,370 --> 00:21:09,170
Oh, it's not turning off.

476
00:21:09,210 --> 00:21:11,110
a

477
00:21:11,150 --> 00:21:13,490
b

478
00:21:13,520 --> 00:21:15,810
c

479
00:21:19,040 --> 00:21:20,300
d

480
00:21:20,340 --> 00:21:21,960
e

481
00:21:21,980 --> 00:21:24,380
f

482
00:21:24,420 --> 00:21:26,190
g

483
00:21:26,220 --> 00:21:29,570
h

484
00:21:31,360 --> 00:21:33,250
- =http://bbs.sfile2012. com=-
- =http://ytet. org=-
Proudly Presents

485
00:21:33,280 --> 00:21:35,360
- =http://bbs.sfile2012. com=-
- =http://ytet. org=-
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Modern Family
Season 3 Episode 15