1 00:00:02,462 --> 00:00:05,632 Good morning, almost husband. 2 00:00:02,462 --> 00:00:05,632 Good morning, almost– 3 00:00:05,716 --> 00:00:08,009 - Oh! No! 4 00:00:08,093 --> 00:00:10,303 Oh, calm down. This can't be the first time you've woken up... 5 00:00:10,387 --> 00:00:11,888 with other men in your bedroom. 6 00:00:11,972 --> 00:00:14,891 - Happy wedding day. - What are you doing here? 7 00:00:14,975 --> 00:00:19,354 You pay for a full-service wedding, you get our full packages. 8 00:00:19,438 --> 00:00:22,315 Oh. Close, honey. So close. 9 00:00:22,399 --> 00:00:24,692 - And we're crossing. - We're crossing. 10 00:00:24,776 --> 00:00:26,319 And trays down. 11 00:00:26,403 --> 00:00:28,280 Napkins. 12 00:00:28,906 --> 00:00:31,282 Relax. Enjoy. 13 00:00:31,366 --> 00:00:33,076 The car will pick you up at 4:00... 14 00:00:33,160 --> 00:00:35,912 to whisk you away to your beautiful hilltop wedding. 15 00:00:35,996 --> 00:00:38,081 How's the weather? I had a dream it rained on everyone. 16 00:00:38,165 --> 00:00:40,834 Dry as a bone. The only thing it will be raining tonight is men. 17 00:00:40,918 --> 00:00:43,419 We really need it. Has anyone heard from Sal? 18 00:00:43,503 --> 00:00:45,755 No. And I will never understand... 19 00:00:45,839 --> 00:00:49,217 why you asked that boozy us-hag to officiate your wedding. 20 00:00:49,301 --> 00:00:51,511 We didn't exactly ask Sal. 21 00:00:51,595 --> 00:00:53,471 - Sal. - Mm-hmm. 22 00:00:53,555 --> 00:00:55,390 We have something very important to talk to you about. 23 00:00:55,474 --> 00:00:57,600 Yeah, we hope that maybe you would be open to the idea– 24 00:00:57,684 --> 00:01:00,270 Yes! I will totally officiate your wedding. 25 00:01:00,354 --> 00:01:03,064 Oh, my drinks! 26 00:01:04,983 --> 00:01:06,985 It was supposed to be an intervention. 27 00:01:20,123 --> 00:01:23,251 - Hey, best man. 28 00:01:23,335 --> 00:01:24,878 Hello, blushing bride. 29 00:01:24,962 --> 00:01:26,462 I feel like I should hate that more. 30 00:01:26,546 --> 00:01:28,464 Yeah, I think I might go with "best person." 31 00:01:28,548 --> 00:01:30,091 Anyway, I'm just calling to see how you're doing. 32 00:01:30,175 --> 00:01:32,302 - I'm great. - Really? 33 00:01:32,386 --> 00:01:35,555 Is this about Mom again? I told you, I'm fine. 34 00:01:35,639 --> 00:01:37,390 My mother can't come to the wedding. 35 00:01:37,474 --> 00:01:38,975 She was at a yoga retreat, 36 00:01:39,059 --> 00:01:41,227 and she fell out of a warrior pose and broke her hip. 37 00:01:41,311 --> 00:01:43,146 Should we consider the possibility... 38 00:01:43,230 --> 00:01:44,772 that someone pushed her? 39 00:01:44,856 --> 00:01:45,899 Cam, please. 40 00:01:45,983 --> 00:01:47,442 They were a bunch of peace-loving hippies... 41 00:01:47,526 --> 00:01:49,402 who spent two weeks in the rain forest with my mother. 42 00:01:49,486 --> 00:01:51,738 Of course someone pushed her. 43 00:01:51,822 --> 00:01:53,907 I'm actually relieved she's not coming. 44 00:01:53,991 --> 00:01:56,075 She has given me the gift of a crazy-free wedding. 45 00:01:56,159 --> 00:01:58,077 I know. I was just a little sad for you. 46 00:01:58,161 --> 00:02:02,081 Mom's a no-show, and you and Dad are hardly even speaking. Enough about Dad. 47 00:02:02,165 --> 00:02:06,377 He doesn't get gay weddings, and I don't get track suits as casual wear. 48 00:02:06,461 --> 00:02:08,546 Can we please talk about something happy, 49 00:02:08,630 --> 00:02:10,423 like my honeymoon in Mexico? 50 00:02:10,507 --> 00:02:13,259 Oh, yeah. You're gonna want to take a look at the Weather Channel. 51 00:02:13,343 --> 00:02:14,260 Hilarious. 52 00:02:14,344 --> 00:02:15,762 Love you. 53 00:02:14,344 --> 00:02:15,762 Love you too. 54 00:02:15,846 --> 00:02:17,430 You're gonna get the gift today, right? 55 00:02:17,514 --> 00:02:20,642 - Don't we have a year to do that? - I have a husband to do that. 56 00:02:20,726 --> 00:02:24,938 They fell in love with this very specific turquoise Italian glass bowl. 57 00:02:25,022 --> 00:02:28,441 I looked everywhere, finally found one, and we're not going to that wedding without it. 58 00:02:28,525 --> 00:02:30,109 I thought you were taking me to the eye doctor. 59 00:02:30,193 --> 00:02:31,945 They said I'm not supposed to drive myself home. 60 00:02:32,029 --> 00:02:34,656 No, no, no, no. I'm picking up Luke from his wilderness trip. 61 00:02:34,740 --> 00:02:36,616 - Alex can take you. - That's a bummer. 62 00:02:36,700 --> 00:02:40,037 - Aw, Dad, I'm touched. - No, not because of you. I'd just rather pick up Luke. 63 00:02:40,912 --> 00:02:42,997 Than go to the eye doctor. 64 00:02:43,081 --> 00:02:46,209 I love spending time with you. Don't worry. You're fun. 65 00:02:46,293 --> 00:02:47,794 Wow. 66 00:02:47,878 --> 00:02:49,379 My dad would never admit this, 67 00:02:49,463 --> 00:02:51,464 but when he wants fun, he goes straight to Luke. 68 00:02:51,548 --> 00:02:53,049 They have a weird connection. 69 00:02:53,133 --> 00:02:54,926 They're like Batman and Robin. 70 00:02:55,010 --> 00:02:58,471 Dad and I are more like Batman and Ruth Bader Ginsburg. 71 00:02:58,555 --> 00:03:01,474 Honey, don't be like that. You're super fun. 72 00:03:01,558 --> 00:03:03,017 You sure I can't get Luke? 73 00:03:03,101 --> 00:03:05,103 I heard that! - Let's do this! 74 00:03:05,187 --> 00:03:07,647 Hello? 75 00:03:07,731 --> 00:03:09,315 Hey, Mom. Gloria wants to know... 76 00:03:09,399 --> 00:03:11,943 if she can do your hair and makeup last after me and Cam's mom. 77 00:03:12,944 --> 00:03:14,445 It's fine. 78 00:03:14,529 --> 00:03:15,989 Something about Luke. I've lost interest. 79 00:03:16,073 --> 00:03:17,573 Okay, love you. Bye. 80 00:03:17,657 --> 00:03:19,826 Damn, this is the best cup of coffee I ever had. 81 00:03:19,910 --> 00:03:22,662 Manny roasts his own beans every Friday night. 82 00:03:22,746 --> 00:03:24,998 That kid's gonna be roasting his own beans for a long time, 83 00:03:25,082 --> 00:03:27,000 if you know what I mean. 84 00:03:27,084 --> 00:03:30,378 Can I just say thank you again for letting us stay here? 85 00:03:30,462 --> 00:03:33,673 You have thanked us enough with that big bag of deer meat. 86 00:03:30,462 --> 00:03:33,673 Aw. 87 00:03:33,757 --> 00:03:36,843 Hey, Mom. Can you see this? 88 00:03:36,927 --> 00:03:38,845 What pimple? 89 00:03:36,927 --> 00:03:38,845 I knew it. 90 00:03:38,929 --> 00:03:40,430 I can't go looking like this. 91 00:03:40,514 --> 00:03:42,015 Weddings are where you meet girls. 92 00:03:42,099 --> 00:03:43,766 Not at this one. 93 00:03:43,850 --> 00:03:45,685 Well, we better be going. Yeah. 94 00:03:45,769 --> 00:03:48,104 Have a great spa day. 95 00:03:45,769 --> 00:03:48,104 Men don't have spa days. 96 00:03:48,188 --> 00:03:50,023 We're just going to the club, 97 00:03:50,107 --> 00:03:52,400 taking a steam, having a couple of rubdowns. 98 00:03:52,484 --> 00:03:55,778 Hey. Do they serve cucumber water at that place? 99 00:03:55,862 --> 00:03:58,573 Sometimes they do a strawberry-basil mix. 100 00:03:55,862 --> 00:03:58,573 Ah. 101 00:03:58,657 --> 00:04:00,199 Merle? 102 00:03:58,657 --> 00:04:00,199 Yes, ma'am? 103 00:04:00,283 --> 00:04:02,660 Be back in time for me to do your tie. 104 00:04:02,744 --> 00:04:04,371 Yes, ma'am. 105 00:04:07,082 --> 00:04:10,209 - I'm so sorry you had to see that. - See what? 106 00:04:10,293 --> 00:04:13,379 - The way we just snapped at each other. - Are you joking? 107 00:04:13,463 --> 00:04:17,550 Obviously, Merle and I are going through a heck of a rough patch. 108 00:04:17,634 --> 00:04:19,552 If I talked to Jay that nice, 109 00:04:19,636 --> 00:04:21,637 he would think I'm cheating on him. 110 00:04:21,721 --> 00:04:23,556 Mrs. P? 111 00:04:23,640 --> 00:04:26,225 My darn taxi never came. I'm gonna miss my flight. 112 00:04:26,309 --> 00:04:28,144 - No. - I just– 113 00:04:28,228 --> 00:04:30,063 I don't want to deal with this right now– 114 00:04:30,147 --> 00:04:32,065 'cause I'm already so scared of flying. 115 00:04:32,149 --> 00:04:34,901 I just hate everything about it– except for the food. 116 00:04:34,985 --> 00:04:38,154 I don't understand how they get such bold flavors out of that tiny kitchen. 117 00:04:38,238 --> 00:04:41,574 Haley, can you drive Andy to the airport, please? 118 00:04:41,658 --> 00:04:44,494 She doesn't want to do that. 119 00:04:41,658 --> 00:04:44,494 Aw, you get me. 120 00:04:44,578 --> 00:04:47,497 - Haley. - I don't have a car. I got dropped off. 121 00:04:47,581 --> 00:04:49,248 I guess we could take my car. 122 00:04:49,332 --> 00:04:51,000 That's settled. Go. 123 00:04:51,084 --> 00:04:53,170 Fine. 124 00:04:51,084 --> 00:04:53,170 Okay. 125 00:04:54,337 --> 00:04:56,756 We really need to hurry. 126 00:04:54,337 --> 00:04:56,756 Relax. We'll get there. 127 00:04:56,840 --> 00:05:00,551 You just worry about being strapped in a giant metal tube 30,000 feet in the air. 128 00:05:00,635 --> 00:05:02,637 That's right. I heard. 129 00:05:06,016 --> 00:05:07,433 Hey. 130 00:05:06,016 --> 00:05:07,433 What? 131 00:05:07,517 --> 00:05:10,103 I just thought of something. What's going on with my hair today? 132 00:05:10,187 --> 00:05:12,980 Daddy's gonna do it up really pretty with flowers. 133 00:05:13,064 --> 00:05:15,108 Not you, right? 134 00:05:13,064 --> 00:05:15,108 No, other Daddy. 135 00:05:15,192 --> 00:05:16,776 Oh, thank God. 136 00:05:16,860 --> 00:05:19,362 Mitchell! This is not my tuxedo. They gave me the wrong order. 137 00:05:19,446 --> 00:05:21,155 And the fuchsia gown didn't tip you off? 138 00:05:21,239 --> 00:05:23,282 I have nine shirts this color. I'm wearing a shirt this color. 139 00:05:23,366 --> 00:05:24,867 Okay, deep breaths. Deep breaths. 140 00:05:24,951 --> 00:05:26,786 We have plenty of time to go to the dry cleaner. 141 00:05:26,870 --> 00:05:29,038 We knew that there would be a bump today, and here it is. 142 00:05:29,122 --> 00:05:31,290 We're getting it done early. This is our bump. 143 00:05:31,374 --> 00:05:33,835 Oh! Oh! 144 00:05:33,919 --> 00:05:36,337 Okay. Okay. So this is our bump. 145 00:05:42,969 --> 00:05:45,638 I can't handle this. We're getting married in five hours. 146 00:05:45,722 --> 00:05:47,765 I don't have my perfectly tailored tux. 147 00:05:47,849 --> 00:05:50,560 I can't just go buy something off the rack. I'm not Cindy Crawford. 148 00:05:50,644 --> 00:05:52,395 Why a woman? I'm just wondering. 149 00:05:52,479 --> 00:05:54,647 What are we gonna do? 150 00:05:52,479 --> 00:05:54,647 We could eat. 151 00:05:54,731 --> 00:05:56,357 We just need to get in touch with the owner. 152 00:05:56,441 --> 00:05:57,942 You know his name, right? 153 00:05:58,026 --> 00:06:00,570 It's... Aziz something? 154 00:05:58,026 --> 00:06:00,570 Uh, no, it's Amir. 155 00:06:00,654 --> 00:06:02,655 It's not Amir, no. 156 00:06:00,654 --> 00:06:02,655 Oh, no, it's, uh, Ahmad. 157 00:06:02,739 --> 00:06:04,407 It's Achmed. 158 00:06:02,739 --> 00:06:04,407 No. Oh, it's on the ticket. 159 00:06:04,491 --> 00:06:06,159 Now I'm just feeling racist. What is it? 160 00:06:06,243 --> 00:06:08,661 Here it is. Jerry. 161 00:06:06,243 --> 00:06:08,661 Oh, Jerry. 162 00:06:08,745 --> 00:06:10,538 Amari. 163 00:06:08,745 --> 00:06:10,538 Jerry Amari. 164 00:06:10,622 --> 00:06:12,165 There you go. 165 00:06:12,958 --> 00:06:14,459 Can you see better in here? 166 00:06:14,543 --> 00:06:16,836 A little, but those drops are really hanging on. 167 00:06:16,920 --> 00:06:19,464 I'm like Han Solo right when he came out of the carbonite. 168 00:06:19,548 --> 00:06:21,007 Really? Nothing? 169 00:06:21,091 --> 00:06:23,009 I get it. Star Trek. 170 00:06:21,091 --> 00:06:23,009 You're breaking my heart. 171 00:06:23,093 --> 00:06:24,677 Save it for Luke. He'll love that. 172 00:06:24,761 --> 00:06:27,430 Can we just get the gift and get out of here? 173 00:06:24,761 --> 00:06:27,430 Right, but first things first. 174 00:06:27,514 --> 00:06:30,766 Let's put on some funny hats, act like they're not there and walk around all serious. 175 00:06:30,850 --> 00:06:33,352 What's the point of this? 176 00:06:30,850 --> 00:06:33,352 That's good. You're nailing it. 177 00:06:33,436 --> 00:06:36,689 Hi, honey. 178 00:06:36,773 --> 00:06:38,733 How was the eye exam? 179 00:06:36,773 --> 00:06:38,733 Great. 180 00:06:38,817 --> 00:06:41,235 I can barely see. I'm wearing giant sunglasses and a girlie hat. 181 00:06:41,319 --> 00:06:42,862 Alex and I are having a blast. 182 00:06:42,946 --> 00:06:44,405 But you got the gift, right? 183 00:06:44,489 --> 00:06:46,699 - That's what people tell me. - Honey, the bowl. 184 00:06:46,783 --> 00:06:50,036 I have the bowl. It's beautiful. I'll see you at home. 185 00:06:50,120 --> 00:06:52,371 Hey, here's a thought. Now that you told Mom you got the bowl, 186 00:06:52,455 --> 00:06:54,081 how about we actually go get it? 187 00:06:54,165 --> 00:06:56,459 Yes, no more fooling around. Let's go get the bowl. 188 00:06:56,543 --> 00:06:58,294 Oh! Right after we find out our sleep number. 189 00:06:58,378 --> 00:06:59,462 Ow! 190 00:07:00,714 --> 00:07:04,300 There's my guy. 191 00:07:00,714 --> 00:07:04,300 I thought Dad was picking me up. 192 00:07:04,384 --> 00:07:06,719 Oh. I missed you too. Come here. 193 00:07:06,803 --> 00:07:08,388 Aw. 194 00:07:09,222 --> 00:07:11,557 So, did you have fun? Yeah. 195 00:07:11,641 --> 00:07:13,809 What was your favorite thing? 196 00:07:11,641 --> 00:07:13,809 I don't remember. 197 00:07:13,893 --> 00:07:17,396 It was yesterday. 198 00:07:13,893 --> 00:07:17,396 Hot dogs. Can we go now? 199 00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:19,065 Honey, I feel bad that you have to leave early. 200 00:07:19,149 --> 00:07:21,567 What are you missing today? 201 00:07:19,149 --> 00:07:21,567 Boating. 202 00:07:21,651 --> 00:07:23,819 Well, I mean, we have a little time. 203 00:07:23,903 --> 00:07:25,614 You don't mind waiting in the car? 204 00:07:28,158 --> 00:07:33,246 So Cam tells me you and Mitch had a little dustup. 205 00:07:33,330 --> 00:07:34,622 Yeah. 206 00:07:34,706 --> 00:07:37,375 Couple of weeks ago. 207 00:07:37,459 --> 00:07:39,544 That kid can hold a grudge. 208 00:07:39,628 --> 00:07:42,296 Little uncomfortable about that wedding, are you? 209 00:07:42,380 --> 00:07:44,048 Well, you know what I'm feeling, right? 210 00:07:44,132 --> 00:07:48,052 I like to think I've evolved on the subject. 211 00:07:48,136 --> 00:07:51,764 We got a couple of lesbo swans in the pond. 212 00:07:51,848 --> 00:07:53,433 They seem pretty happy. 213 00:07:54,601 --> 00:07:56,102 Hey, Jay. 214 00:07:54,601 --> 00:07:56,102 Hey. 215 00:07:56,186 --> 00:07:57,728 Howard, Larry. 216 00:07:57,812 --> 00:08:01,357 This is my, uh– 217 00:08:01,441 --> 00:08:04,151 This is my friend Merle, and he's visiting from Missouri. 218 00:08:04,235 --> 00:08:06,612 Ooh, the "Show Me" state. 219 00:08:06,696 --> 00:08:09,407 - Don't say that in here. 220 00:08:12,118 --> 00:08:13,995 So, what brings you to town, Merle? 221 00:08:14,079 --> 00:08:18,749 Well, uh, our– 222 00:08:18,833 --> 00:08:23,546 Jay's and my... kids are getting married today. 223 00:08:23,630 --> 00:08:25,631 - Congratulations. - Isn't that nice? 224 00:08:25,715 --> 00:08:27,258 Father of the bride, father of the groom... 225 00:08:27,342 --> 00:08:29,510 taking a steam together the day of the wedding. 226 00:08:29,594 --> 00:08:31,178 Yeah, something like that. 227 00:08:31,262 --> 00:08:33,347 The day my son got married– piece of cake. 228 00:08:33,431 --> 00:08:36,726 But the day I lost my little girl– Oh, that wrecked me. 229 00:08:36,810 --> 00:08:39,229 So which one of you has to suffer through that today? 230 00:08:40,522 --> 00:08:42,189 You know what? It's too hot in here. 231 00:08:42,273 --> 00:08:43,316 Let's go. 232 00:08:42,273 --> 00:08:43,316 Yeah. 233 00:08:43,400 --> 00:08:45,484 Mm-hmm. Real evolved. 234 00:08:45,568 --> 00:08:47,278 Your swans would be ashamed. 235 00:08:48,780 --> 00:08:52,366 Well, I guess I first noticed it after Pameron moved out... 236 00:08:52,450 --> 00:08:55,494 and Merle and I just started sniping at each other. 237 00:08:55,578 --> 00:08:57,830 Yeah, like that bloodbath this morning. 238 00:08:57,914 --> 00:09:00,166 Oh. Again, I am so sorry. 239 00:09:00,250 --> 00:09:04,211 But Merle is not the type you can talk to about things. 240 00:09:04,295 --> 00:09:07,506 I mean, the man's had a toothpick in his mouth our whole marriage, 241 00:09:07,590 --> 00:09:10,051 and I can't say a word? 242 00:09:10,135 --> 00:09:13,012 No, you can't sit on your feelings. You will explode. 243 00:09:13,096 --> 00:09:16,390 I have, like, 10 little explosions every day... 244 00:09:16,474 --> 00:09:18,726 so I don't have the big one. 245 00:09:18,810 --> 00:09:22,021 The women in my family, sometimes they shoot the husbands. 246 00:09:22,105 --> 00:09:25,566 Well, we've had 48... good years. 247 00:09:25,650 --> 00:09:28,903 I guess we're just gonna run out the clock. 248 00:09:28,987 --> 00:09:32,365 No! You're still– 249 00:09:32,449 --> 00:09:34,533 You have– 250 00:09:34,617 --> 00:09:36,118 That is bad attitude. 251 00:09:36,202 --> 00:09:38,996 You have to tell Merle what is bothering you. 252 00:09:39,080 --> 00:09:41,165 Oh, he doesn't want to hear all that. 253 00:09:41,249 --> 00:09:44,627 He gets all closed off and– macho. 254 00:09:44,711 --> 00:09:48,506 You're ticklin' my piggies. 255 00:09:48,590 --> 00:09:50,883 You get used to that. 256 00:09:50,967 --> 00:09:54,011 It's a shame Mitchell's mother couldn't make it to the wedding. 257 00:09:54,095 --> 00:09:55,554 For who? 258 00:09:55,638 --> 00:09:58,474 Hmm, things still rough between the two of you? 259 00:09:58,558 --> 00:10:00,893 Merle, things have always been rough. 260 00:10:00,977 --> 00:10:03,896 That woman never stopped complaining. 261 00:10:03,980 --> 00:10:06,941 Finding the strength to leave Dede was the hardest thing I ever did, 262 00:10:07,025 --> 00:10:09,443 but the best decision I ever made. 263 00:10:09,527 --> 00:10:13,072 Well, you sure made a score with that Gloria. Wow. 264 00:10:13,156 --> 00:10:15,241 - Big time. 265 00:10:15,325 --> 00:10:18,661 I bet you landed her before she got a gander at those hooves of yours. 266 00:10:20,330 --> 00:10:22,499 You're welcome, by the way. 267 00:10:23,500 --> 00:10:25,751 So what are you gonna do in Utah? 268 00:10:25,835 --> 00:10:29,171 Well, me and my girlfriend haven't seen each other in a while, 269 00:10:29,255 --> 00:10:33,008 so we're gonna be like a couple of bunny rabbits– Wow. 270 00:10:33,092 --> 00:10:35,762 just hopping all over town. Oh. 271 00:10:36,846 --> 00:10:39,473 - Is this her? - Yep, that's my Beth. 272 00:10:39,557 --> 00:10:41,517 Huh. She's pretty. 273 00:10:41,601 --> 00:10:45,438 Yeah. She's the most beautiful creature, inside and out. 274 00:10:45,522 --> 00:10:47,732 I'm just the luckiest guy ever to get to love her. 275 00:10:47,816 --> 00:10:51,610 Okay, she may be real, but no way you are. Who talks like that? 276 00:10:51,694 --> 00:10:53,446 You know, I hate when you say things like that... 277 00:10:53,530 --> 00:10:55,740 because you are funny and you are pretty... 278 00:10:55,824 --> 00:10:57,700 and you are smart in an original way, 279 00:10:57,784 --> 00:10:59,618 so why shouldn't a guy feel lucky to love you? 280 00:10:59,702 --> 00:11:01,454 Shut up. Be normal. 281 00:11:01,538 --> 00:11:03,038 Hey, my phone just buzzed. 282 00:11:03,122 --> 00:11:04,623 Can you read it? 283 00:11:03,122 --> 00:11:04,623 Yeah. 284 00:11:04,707 --> 00:11:06,668 I don't want to put our lives at risk. 285 00:11:08,169 --> 00:11:10,087 It's, uh– It's from the airline. 286 00:11:10,171 --> 00:11:11,964 Your flight's delayed three hours. 287 00:11:12,048 --> 00:11:14,008 Three hours? 288 00:11:12,048 --> 00:11:14,008 Yeah. 289 00:11:14,092 --> 00:11:15,634 Jinkies! 290 00:11:15,718 --> 00:11:18,387 I guess we can just drop me off at a coffee shop, 291 00:11:18,471 --> 00:11:20,890 and I can take a cab from there. 292 00:11:18,471 --> 00:11:20,890 Okay. 293 00:11:22,725 --> 00:11:24,477 Actually, I really need to wake up. 294 00:11:24,561 --> 00:11:26,645 Maybe I'll grab a coffee with you, if you don't mind. 295 00:11:26,729 --> 00:11:29,565 Please. The more I talk to people, the less I imagine... 296 00:11:29,649 --> 00:11:33,152 plummeting to my death in a fiery spiral of screaming and crying. 297 00:11:33,236 --> 00:11:36,489 Pretty dark for someone who just said "jinkies." 298 00:11:36,573 --> 00:11:39,450 Well, I guess we have different definitions of "emergency" then. 299 00:11:39,534 --> 00:11:41,035 You know, I'm just gonna say it. 300 00:11:41,119 --> 00:11:43,162 911 dispatchers have a little bit of attitude. 301 00:11:43,246 --> 00:11:44,997 Well, you requested a SWAT team. 302 00:11:45,081 --> 00:11:47,333 Is anybody else hungry? 303 00:11:47,417 --> 00:11:50,419 Mitchell. Mitchell! Look at this. 304 00:11:50,503 --> 00:11:52,838 - Do you think you could fit in there? - I'm not doing that. 305 00:11:52,922 --> 00:11:55,466 Then what am I gonna wear to our wedding, my black funeral suit? 306 00:11:55,550 --> 00:11:57,009 Is that the tone you want to set? 307 00:11:57,093 --> 00:11:59,678 You wore it to one funeral, and you didn't even know Bea Arthur. 308 00:11:59,762 --> 00:12:01,430 I felt like I did. 309 00:11:59,762 --> 00:12:01,430 I know. 310 00:12:01,514 --> 00:12:03,015 Oh. 311 00:12:03,099 --> 00:12:04,725 It's Pepper. He'll know what to do. 312 00:12:04,809 --> 00:12:06,560 - Yes. - Pepper. Disaster. 313 00:12:06,644 --> 00:12:08,354 It's not a disaster. 314 00:12:08,438 --> 00:12:10,022 It's just a wildfire. 315 00:12:10,106 --> 00:12:12,691 And it's most certainly not going to burn down your wedding. 316 00:12:12,775 --> 00:12:13,776 - What? - What? 317 00:12:13,860 --> 00:12:15,528 There's a wildfire near the venue. 318 00:12:15,612 --> 00:12:17,696 No! Yes, but it's fine. 319 00:12:17,780 --> 00:12:19,907 Ronaldo is going to text-blast the guest list, 320 00:12:19,991 --> 00:12:23,035 tell them the wedding is being moved from 5:00 to 1:00. 321 00:12:23,119 --> 00:12:24,286 Oh, my God! 322 00:12:24,370 --> 00:12:25,996 Don't panic. 323 00:12:26,080 --> 00:12:30,167 Would somebody please turn off that wretched waterfall? 324 00:12:30,251 --> 00:12:32,462 Kill the waterfall immediately! 325 00:12:33,630 --> 00:12:36,715 The fire is already 28% contained. 326 00:12:36,799 --> 00:12:39,510 - That doesn't sound like a lot. - Just get dressed and look pretty. 327 00:12:39,594 --> 00:12:41,930 I'm going to send the car for you in one hour. 328 00:12:43,306 --> 00:12:45,224 Have you lost your mind? 329 00:12:47,518 --> 00:12:49,311 Go! You disgust me! 330 00:12:49,395 --> 00:12:51,897 Go! 331 00:12:51,981 --> 00:12:54,275 Okay. Now what are we gonna do? 332 00:12:54,359 --> 00:12:57,612 No, I guess maybe– Cam, there's no way I could fit through there. 333 00:13:00,698 --> 00:13:03,242 You two exhaust me. 334 00:13:05,078 --> 00:13:07,913 What? We have to be there in an hour! 335 00:13:07,997 --> 00:13:10,791 I can't go like this. Look at me. 336 00:13:10,875 --> 00:13:12,418 I hate you. 337 00:13:12,502 --> 00:13:15,588 Prepare yourself for the best burger of your life. 338 00:13:19,342 --> 00:13:20,843 We gotta go. 339 00:13:22,804 --> 00:13:24,138 Uh-oh. 340 00:13:24,222 --> 00:13:27,641 Maybe we should try on more hats. 341 00:13:24,222 --> 00:13:27,641 You think we have time? 342 00:13:27,725 --> 00:13:29,518 It's not working. 343 00:13:29,602 --> 00:13:31,103 And there's no oar? 344 00:13:31,187 --> 00:13:33,772 We are literally up a creek without a paddle. 345 00:13:33,856 --> 00:13:35,649 Okay, Lily? Lily! 346 00:13:35,733 --> 00:13:38,444 Okay, you're gonna press the green button to start it, 347 00:13:38,528 --> 00:13:41,780 and then you're gonna look for number 913. 348 00:13:41,864 --> 00:13:44,950 And then, when you see it go by, you press the red button to stop it, okay? 349 00:13:45,034 --> 00:13:48,037 - Okay. - Oh, I'm so glad you're here. 350 00:13:48,121 --> 00:13:51,373 I get us into these situations and I freak, and then you always fix the problem. 351 00:13:51,457 --> 00:13:53,042 We each have our own gifts. 352 00:13:53,126 --> 00:13:55,794 It's just it's easier for me to stay calm in the face of– 353 00:13:55,878 --> 00:13:57,963 Oh, my God! 354 00:13:58,047 --> 00:14:02,051 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 355 00:13:58,047 --> 00:14:02,051 Lily, Daddy's coming for you! 356 00:14:05,638 --> 00:14:08,349 Okay now, Lily, press the red button. 357 00:14:08,433 --> 00:14:10,643 - I'm breaking the window! - Put that down! 358 00:14:10,727 --> 00:14:12,853 Oh. 359 00:14:10,727 --> 00:14:12,853 Oh. Thank God you're here. 360 00:14:12,937 --> 00:14:15,148 Are you breaking into my store? 361 00:14:16,107 --> 00:14:18,484 Uh, no. Why would you even say that? 362 00:14:18,568 --> 00:14:20,736 - My alarm went off. - Oh, well, okay. 363 00:14:20,820 --> 00:14:23,155 That is a coincidence, because his tuxedo is in there, 364 00:14:23,239 --> 00:14:25,866 and we're getting married in an hour. 365 00:14:25,950 --> 00:14:28,160 You are totally saving us. 366 00:14:28,244 --> 00:14:30,663 You know, I freak out at situations like this, 367 00:14:30,747 --> 00:14:32,665 which forces him to fix the problem. 368 00:14:32,749 --> 00:14:36,168 I do. I do. 369 00:14:32,749 --> 00:14:36,168 So I'm over here freaking out, 370 00:14:36,252 --> 00:14:39,213 while he's somewhere else, fixing the problem. 371 00:14:39,297 --> 00:14:41,382 Oh, my gosh. I'm so sorry. 372 00:14:39,297 --> 00:14:41,382 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. 373 00:14:41,883 --> 00:14:43,551 Oh! Oh. 374 00:14:45,094 --> 00:14:48,222 Maybe that's a good thing. You know, the yin, the yang. 375 00:14:48,306 --> 00:14:50,391 Yeah, whatever, Jerry. 376 00:14:50,475 --> 00:14:51,725 Where'd she come from? 377 00:14:51,809 --> 00:14:53,560 Oh, because she doesn't look like us. 378 00:14:53,644 --> 00:14:55,145 That's offensive. 379 00:14:53,644 --> 00:14:55,145 Oh, Jerry. 380 00:14:55,229 --> 00:14:56,731 Oh, Jerry. 381 00:14:59,317 --> 00:15:02,528 What are we going to do? 382 00:14:59,317 --> 00:15:02,528 I know how to get up there. 383 00:15:02,612 --> 00:15:03,946 I'm blind. Follow me. 384 00:15:04,030 --> 00:15:05,197 Oh, I'm not doing that. 385 00:15:04,030 --> 00:15:05,197 Alex! 386 00:15:10,078 --> 00:15:12,287 Excuse me. Could someone help me to find the back of the line? 387 00:15:12,371 --> 00:15:13,872 Oh, no, no. It's okay. 388 00:15:12,371 --> 00:15:13,872 Oh. 389 00:15:13,956 --> 00:15:15,457 Go right ahead. 390 00:15:13,956 --> 00:15:15,457 Are you sure? 391 00:15:15,541 --> 00:15:17,543 Can I help you? 392 00:15:15,541 --> 00:15:17,543 Yes, picking up for Dunphy. 393 00:15:17,627 --> 00:15:19,336 It's on hold, I believe. 394 00:15:19,420 --> 00:15:21,839 Beautiful day, huh? I was told. 395 00:15:21,923 --> 00:15:24,550 Here we go. Credit card? 396 00:15:24,634 --> 00:15:27,302 Uh, just to be sure, that is turquoise, right? 397 00:15:27,386 --> 00:15:29,763 Because my wife said it also comes in emerald. 398 00:15:29,847 --> 00:15:31,974 Yes. Sir, it's a very long line. 399 00:15:32,058 --> 00:15:34,769 Hmm. Okay. Um, can I have it for one second? 400 00:15:36,729 --> 00:15:37,730 Thank you. 401 00:15:39,774 --> 00:15:41,734 Yeah, that doesn't feel like turquoise. 402 00:15:41,818 --> 00:15:44,319 You can feel color? You gotta be kidding me. 403 00:15:44,403 --> 00:15:46,488 When you lose one sense, all your other senses become heightened. 404 00:15:46,572 --> 00:15:48,449 That's why you sound so loud and judgy to me. 405 00:15:48,533 --> 00:15:51,744 My mistake, sir. I'll be right back. 406 00:15:48,533 --> 00:15:51,744 Okay. 407 00:15:55,164 --> 00:15:56,623 Here it is. 408 00:15:56,707 --> 00:15:58,542 Hey, he's messing with the blind guy. 409 00:15:58,626 --> 00:16:00,335 Thank you– wherever you are. 410 00:16:00,419 --> 00:16:02,671 - I don't think he's really blind. - Excuse me. 411 00:16:02,755 --> 00:16:04,715 My father suffered methanol poisoning... 412 00:16:04,799 --> 00:16:06,633 on a humanitarian mission in Honduras, 413 00:16:06,717 --> 00:16:10,596 resulting in permanent neurological dysfunction and irreversible blindness. 414 00:16:10,680 --> 00:16:13,640 It's been hard enough on our family without people like you making it worse. 415 00:16:13,724 --> 00:16:17,687 If he feels it's not the bowl, it's not the bowl. 416 00:16:18,354 --> 00:16:20,189 I'm so sorry. 417 00:16:20,273 --> 00:16:22,483 I'll check on the turquoise. 418 00:16:22,567 --> 00:16:26,988 Okay, that was kind of fun. 419 00:16:22,567 --> 00:16:26,988 I'm winking at you right now. 420 00:16:27,738 --> 00:16:29,948 Oh! This is not working. 421 00:16:30,032 --> 00:16:33,952 We are never gonna get there on time, and I am the best person! 422 00:16:34,036 --> 00:16:35,996 Oh, God. Oh! 423 00:16:36,080 --> 00:16:37,748 I think just broke a nail on a turtle. 424 00:16:37,832 --> 00:16:39,792 You're the one who wanted to come out here. 425 00:16:39,876 --> 00:16:43,587 Yes, I did, because I wanted to spend some time with my son. 426 00:16:43,671 --> 00:16:46,173 You've– You've been pushing me away so much lately, 427 00:16:46,257 --> 00:16:48,634 and I don't want you to grow up to be the kind of kid... 428 00:16:48,718 --> 00:16:51,804 who doesn't care if his mom shows up at his wedding. 429 00:16:48,718 --> 00:16:51,804 What are you talking about? 430 00:16:51,888 --> 00:16:55,474 Nana isn't coming today, and Mitchell's relieved. 431 00:16:55,558 --> 00:16:58,852 Well, I'd be really sad if you missed my wedding. 432 00:16:58,936 --> 00:17:01,063 Really? You promise? 433 00:17:01,147 --> 00:17:02,981 Totally. And so would Kate. 434 00:17:03,065 --> 00:17:07,152 Who's Kate? 435 00:17:03,065 --> 00:17:07,152 Upton. My wife, your daughter-in-law. 436 00:17:07,236 --> 00:17:08,737 Oh. 437 00:17:07,236 --> 00:17:08,737 Get on board. 438 00:17:08,821 --> 00:17:11,824 Come on. What has been going on with you recently? 439 00:17:11,908 --> 00:17:13,367 You've been so moody. 440 00:17:13,451 --> 00:17:16,078 I'm sorry, but I'm sick of going to school... 441 00:17:16,162 --> 00:17:19,706 and hearing teachers say, "You're Alex Dunphy's brother? Really?" 442 00:17:19,790 --> 00:17:22,501 Like I'm an idiot. 443 00:17:19,790 --> 00:17:22,501 Oh, honey, you're not an idiot. 444 00:17:22,585 --> 00:17:26,171 I forgot the paddle even though we just learned the boating checklist yesterday. 445 00:17:26,255 --> 00:17:28,006 Alex would never do that. 446 00:17:28,090 --> 00:17:31,301 And if she did, she'd probably, like– I don't know– 447 00:17:31,385 --> 00:17:36,849 use this fishing rod to cast out and hook us on the shore because "I'm so smart." 448 00:17:36,933 --> 00:17:41,019 And then she'd pull us in because everything she does always works. 449 00:17:41,103 --> 00:17:43,856 Oh, my God. It's working. It's working. 450 00:17:43,940 --> 00:17:46,651 Figures. Alex. 451 00:17:48,527 --> 00:17:50,947 Ooh, ooh. Don't move. The lighting is really cool right now. 452 00:17:52,031 --> 00:17:53,365 What are you doing? Don't smile. 453 00:17:53,449 --> 00:17:54,741 Why? It's my favorite thing. 454 00:17:54,825 --> 00:17:56,660 No, really, be serious. 455 00:17:56,744 --> 00:17:58,704 Look out the window. 456 00:17:56,744 --> 00:17:58,704 Okay. 457 00:18:01,123 --> 00:18:04,543 Look. 458 00:18:01,123 --> 00:18:04,543 Whoa! 459 00:18:04,627 --> 00:18:07,045 That is honestly the best photo anyone's ever taken of me. 460 00:18:07,129 --> 00:18:09,548 Thank you. 461 00:18:07,129 --> 00:18:09,548 You mind if I send a copy to Beth? 462 00:18:10,591 --> 00:18:12,301 Andy, um, 463 00:18:13,302 --> 00:18:15,137 when I read the text about your flight, 464 00:18:15,221 --> 00:18:18,056 I saw the text from Beth telling you not to come. 465 00:18:18,140 --> 00:18:21,226 Yeah, she doesn't mean that. 466 00:18:21,310 --> 00:18:23,061 She said it's over. 467 00:18:23,145 --> 00:18:25,147 That can mean a lot of different things. 468 00:18:26,899 --> 00:18:28,818 Your phone's buzzing again. 469 00:18:31,654 --> 00:18:33,488 Oh, my God. The wedding got moved up. 470 00:18:33,572 --> 00:18:35,241 I have to go. 471 00:18:36,492 --> 00:18:38,327 Andy, are you sure about getting on that plane? 472 00:18:38,411 --> 00:18:39,912 Yeah. Yeah, I-I'm fine. 473 00:18:39,996 --> 00:18:41,830 You know, she does this every once in a while. 474 00:18:41,914 --> 00:18:44,208 She just likes the drama. 475 00:18:41,914 --> 00:18:44,208 But I– 476 00:18:44,292 --> 00:18:47,377 Haley, I appreciate your concern, I really do, 477 00:18:47,461 --> 00:18:50,130 but I've been in this relationship off and on for eight years, 478 00:18:50,214 --> 00:18:52,382 so I kind of know what I'm doing, all right? 479 00:18:52,466 --> 00:18:53,968 Thank you for the ride. 480 00:18:57,305 --> 00:19:00,516 It's a tool of the trade. The car one says Toyota. 481 00:19:06,355 --> 00:19:08,774 I have eyes on the grooms. 482 00:19:06,355 --> 00:19:08,774 I'm three feet behind you. 483 00:19:08,858 --> 00:19:10,192 How's it going? Are people showing up? 484 00:19:10,276 --> 00:19:11,777 It's all under control. 485 00:19:11,861 --> 00:19:14,029 Surprise! Guess who's on time. 486 00:19:14,113 --> 00:19:16,990 Oh, my God! Sal, wow. You're pregnant. 487 00:19:14,113 --> 00:19:16,990 Congratulations. 488 00:19:17,074 --> 00:19:19,493 Thank you. We're really excited. 489 00:19:19,577 --> 00:19:20,994 You're huge. 490 00:19:21,078 --> 00:19:22,287 Nice teeth. 491 00:19:22,371 --> 00:19:24,957 - Uh, so, wh-where's Tony? - Oh, beats me. 492 00:19:25,041 --> 00:19:26,875 - Haven't spoken to him since the divorce. - Oh. 493 00:19:26,959 --> 00:19:29,294 Yeah, it's, uh, Eddie. Eddie! Baby. 494 00:19:29,378 --> 00:19:30,837 - Yeah. - Come here. Come meet the girls. 495 00:19:30,921 --> 00:19:32,673 Eddie. This is Eddie. 496 00:19:32,757 --> 00:19:35,467 Cam, Mitch, Peps, this guy. 497 00:19:35,551 --> 00:19:37,636 Hey. 498 00:19:35,551 --> 00:19:37,636 This is Eddie, my baby daddy. 499 00:19:37,720 --> 00:19:40,806 - So why didn't you tell us? - We just wanted to get through that first trimester... 500 00:19:40,890 --> 00:19:42,849 before we let the cat out of the bag. 501 00:19:40,890 --> 00:19:42,849 Mm-hmm. 502 00:19:42,933 --> 00:19:44,226 When was that, last summer? 503 00:19:44,310 --> 00:19:47,646 - So you're how far along now? - About four months. 504 00:19:47,730 --> 00:19:49,231 Right, honey? 505 00:19:47,730 --> 00:19:49,231 Yep. 506 00:19:49,315 --> 00:19:53,402 Just about the exact amount of time Eddie and I have been together. 507 00:19:53,486 --> 00:19:56,822 I don't understand. Four is this many, yes? 508 00:19:56,906 --> 00:19:58,156 Sí. 509 00:19:58,240 --> 00:19:59,825 Hola, handsome boys. 510 00:19:59,909 --> 00:20:01,868 - You two look gorgeous. - Gracias. 511 00:20:01,952 --> 00:20:03,913 - Thank you. - Pretty nice, huh? Like a regular wedding. 512 00:20:04,789 --> 00:20:06,290 What? 513 00:20:04,789 --> 00:20:06,290 Good start, Jay. 514 00:20:06,374 --> 00:20:09,919 Hey, Merle, it's your son's wedding. Maybe lose the toothpick? 515 00:20:11,587 --> 00:20:14,172 I'm getting tired of this nagging. I'm leaving you. 516 00:20:14,256 --> 00:20:16,591 - What? - Not if I leave you first. 517 00:20:16,675 --> 00:20:19,553 No, no, no. You don't mean this. 518 00:20:16,675 --> 00:20:19,553 Don't you feel bad, honey. 519 00:20:19,637 --> 00:20:21,179 You have helped me today. 520 00:20:21,263 --> 00:20:23,599 Thanks for getting me over the hump. 521 00:20:24,433 --> 00:20:26,101 What did you do? 522 00:20:26,185 --> 00:20:28,979 Wow. We're doing this. 523 00:20:29,063 --> 00:20:30,564 Are you ready? 524 00:20:30,648 --> 00:20:32,566 I don't want to wait another minute. 525 00:20:32,650 --> 00:20:34,943 Lily, hit it. 526 00:20:42,618 --> 00:20:46,038 On three, boys. One, two– 527 00:20:46,122 --> 00:20:48,332 Attention! Attention, please. 528 00:20:48,416 --> 00:20:51,084 The fire has jumped the freeway. I'm really sorry, folks. 529 00:20:51,168 --> 00:20:53,295 I'm gonna have to evacuate everyone immediately. 530 00:20:54,964 --> 00:20:57,925 So this is our bump.