1
00:00:05,857 --> 00:00:08,024
EVERY EPISODE OF "THE BACHELOR,"

2
00:00:08,065 --> 00:00:09,898
WHY DON'T YOU JUST HIT

3
00:00:08,065 --> 00:00:09,898
WITH A SLEDGEHAMMER?

4
00:00:09,940 --> 00:00:11,690
DAD, TURN DOWN THAT SONG!

5
00:00:11,731 --> 00:00:13,314
[ HALL & OATES'

6
00:00:11,731 --> 00:00:13,314
"I CAN'T GO FOR THAT" PLAYS ]

7
00:00:19,149 --> 00:00:20,149
HI.

8
00:00:20,189 --> 00:00:21,481
WHAT?

9
00:00:21,523 --> 00:00:23,024
OH, HAVE HIM TELL CAM

10
00:00:23,065 --> 00:00:24,314
I'LL PICK HIM UP

11
00:00:24,356 --> 00:00:25,481
I CAN'T EVEN HEAR HIM

12
00:00:24,356 --> 00:00:25,481
IT'S SO LOUD.

13
00:00:25,523 --> 00:00:27,230
CAN EVERYBODY JUST SHUT UP?

14
00:00:31,731 --> 00:00:33,230
Hello.

15
00:00:31,731 --> 00:00:33,230
Is this Phil Dumpster?

16
00:00:33,272 --> 00:00:34,940
GIL?

17
00:00:36,564 --> 00:00:38,149
[ GIL SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY

18
00:00:36,564 --> 00:00:38,149
ON TELEPHONE ]

19
00:00:42,272 --> 00:00:43,314
No, I did it last year.

20
00:00:45,272 --> 00:00:47,272
I'VE GOT

21
00:00:45,272 --> 00:00:47,272
A CONFERENCE CALL AT 1:20.

22
00:00:47,314 --> 00:00:49,065
THEN LUKE'S TUTOR

23
00:00:49,107 --> 00:00:51,815
2:45 SALES MEETING: AND I STILL

24
00:00:51,857 --> 00:00:54,314
And yet you somehow found time

25
00:00:51,857 --> 00:00:54,314
to bitch at me.

26
00:00:54,356 --> 00:00:56,148
Wow!

27
00:00:54,356 --> 00:00:56,148
You really can have it all.

28
00:00:56,189 --> 00:00:59,230
UGH. JUST GET HER A

29
00:00:56,189 --> 00:00:59,230
YOU BIG BABY!

30
00:00:59,272 --> 00:01:01,940
You're back in second place

31
00:00:59,272 --> 00:01:01,940
with your favorite view.

32
00:00:59,272 --> 00:01:01,940
UGH.

33
00:01:01,982 --> 00:01:04,314
HAVE BE SO DRAMATIC?

34
00:01:11,272 --> 00:01:13,189
WHY ARE WE STOPPING?

35
00:01:26,857 --> 00:01:27,815
HEY.

36
00:01:27,857 --> 00:01:29,230
HEY.

37
00:01:27,857 --> 00:01:29,230
OH.

38
00:01:32,481 --> 00:01:34,815
OH, W-WHAT IS THIS?

39
00:01:32,481 --> 00:01:34,815
I DON'T CARE FOR THIS.

40
00:01:35,982 --> 00:01:37,106
OH, MY GOD!

41
00:01:41,065 --> 00:01:43,230
AND IT

42
00:01:44,648 --> 00:01:47,314
OH, MY GOD!

43
00:01:44,648 --> 00:01:47,314
AND EVERYONE'S OKAY?

44
00:01:47,356 --> 00:01:49,024
AW.

45
00:01:51,065 --> 00:01:52,523
IT'S FINE.

46
00:01:54,731 --> 00:01:57,230
OKAY.

47
00:01:57,272 --> 00:01:58,439
"TO OUR BEST FRIEND."

48
00:01:57,272 --> 00:01:58,439
MM.

49
00:01:58,481 --> 00:02:00,230
THAT'S A LITTLE SARCASTIC.

50
00:01:58,481 --> 00:02:00,230
IT'S HER BIRTHDAY.

51
00:02:00,272 --> 00:02:01,397
I DON'T KNOW.

52
00:02:00,272 --> 00:02:01,397
NO, I MEAN IT:

53
00:02:05,648 --> 00:02:06,815
OH,

54
00:02:05,648 --> 00:02:06,815
AND WE'RE DOING THIS AGAIN.

55
00:02:06,857 --> 00:02:07,857
OH, GOD.

56
00:02:07,898 --> 00:02:09,230
HI.

57
00:02:07,898 --> 00:02:09,230
I'LL BE THERE IN A SEC, YEAH.

58
00:02:10,773 --> 00:02:12,272
THAT'S GREAT.

59
00:02:12,314 --> 00:02:14,230
SO I'LL JUST HAVE TO MOVE

60
00:02:12,314 --> 00:02:14,230
YOU KNOW WHAT?

61
00:02:14,272 --> 00:02:15,648
I'M GONNA EAT IN THE CAR

62
00:02:14,272 --> 00:02:15,648
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.

63
00:02:15,690 --> 00:02:17,230
NO, NO, NO.

64
00:02:15,690 --> 00:02:17,230
GIVE IT!

65
00:02:17,272 --> 00:02:19,523
RIGHT BEFORE I ALMOST DIED?

66
00:02:19,564 --> 00:02:20,898
EXACTLY WHAT YOU'RE DOING.

67
00:02:20,940 --> 00:02:22,314
HUMORING A RELATIVE?

68
00:02:22,356 --> 00:02:24,439
NO, NO, SCHEDULING MY LIFE

69
00:02:26,064 --> 00:02:27,314
"CALL NEW YORK OFFICE ...

70
00:02:26,064 --> 00:02:27,314
4:17 P.M."

71
00:02:29,272 --> 00:02:31,230
TO THE NEAREST FIVE MINUTES?

72
00:02:33,272 --> 00:02:36,230
NO, I DON'T WANT TO BE

73
00:02:33,272 --> 00:02:36,230
A 4:17 KIND OF PERSON:

74
00:02:36,272 --> 00:02:37,523
DO YOU?

75
00:02:36,272 --> 00:02:37,523
YES, I DO.

76
00:02:37,564 --> 00:02:39,731
'CAUSE THAT PHONE CALL

77
00:02:37,564 --> 00:02:39,731
NEEDS TO BE DONE BY 4:23

78
00:02:39,773 --> 00:02:41,940
BY 4:41.

79
00:02:42,773 --> 00:02:44,230
NOPE.NO.

80
00:02:42,773 --> 00:02:44,230
GIVE ME ...

81
00:02:44,272 --> 00:02:45,314
WE'RE GONNA DO SOMETHING

82
00:02:45,356 --> 00:02:47,064
YES, TAKE THE REST

83
00:02:47,106 --> 00:02:48,397
I CAN'T DO THAT.

84
00:02:48,439 --> 00:02:50,230
I DID!

85
00:02:48,439 --> 00:02:50,230
'CAUSE YOU WORK

86
00:02:50,272 --> 00:02:52,230
NO, NO, NO,

87
00:02:52,272 --> 00:02:54,940
I'M REALLY SWAMPED

88
00:02:56,982 --> 00:02:58,230
STOP.

89
00:02:58,272 --> 00:02:59,230
CAN WE SLOW DOWN?

90
00:02:59,272 --> 00:03:00,439
OW! YOU'RE CHAFING MY WRIST.

91
00:03:00,481 --> 00:03:02,106
DON'T PRETEND

92
00:03:00,481 --> 00:03:02,106
YOU'RE NOT LOVING THIS.

93
00:03:02,148 --> 00:03:04,397
OKAY.I THINK I JUST

94
00:03:04,439 --> 00:03:05,940
C-CAN WE GO BACK NOW?

95
00:03:05,982 --> 00:03:07,439
NO!

96
00:03:05,982 --> 00:03:07,439
GOD.

97
00:03:07,481 --> 00:03:09,148
NO, BECAUSE WE ARE NOT

98
00:03:10,564 --> 00:03:12,230
I'M JUST DOING

99
00:03:10,564 --> 00:03:12,230
WHAT YOU'RE MAKING ME DO.

100
00:03:13,272 --> 00:03:14,481
NO, NO, NO. NO, NO, NO.

101
00:03:14,523 --> 00:03:16,064
LET'S GO BACK, LET'S GO BACK,

102
00:03:14,523 --> 00:03:16,064
LET'S GO BACK.

103
00:03:16,106 --> 00:03:17,230
WHY?

104
00:03:16,106 --> 00:03:17,230
WHY DO WE HAVE TO GO BACK NOW?

105
00:03:17,272 --> 00:03:18,606
WHY ... OH, I GET IT:

106
00:03:18,648 --> 00:03:20,815
YOU'RE STILL SCARED

107
00:03:20,857 --> 00:03:22,230
"STILL"?

108
00:03:20,857 --> 00:03:22,230
"SCARED"?

109
00:03:20,857 --> 00:03:22,230
WHAT UNDERPASS?

110
00:03:28,272 --> 00:03:30,230
'CAUSE IT WAS DARK,

111
00:03:31,356 --> 00:03:32,690
I DON'T REMEMBER THIS

112
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AT ALL.

113
00:03:34,481 --> 00:03:36,857
"YOU'RE SO GAY."

114
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OH, DIDN'T I?

115
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A LOT.

116
00:03:42,481 --> 00:03:45,106
UGH.

117
00:03:45,148 --> 00:03:46,648
DO YOU EVER MISS THAT?

118
00:03:46,690 --> 00:03:47,940
NO.

119
00:03:46,690 --> 00:03:47,940
NO.

120
00:03:47,981 --> 00:03:49,230
THAT'S HURTFUL.

121
00:03:51,314 --> 00:03:53,064
I'M SORRY, MITCHELL.

122
00:03:53,106 --> 00:03:55,064
AND I SHOULD'VE HELD YOUR HAND

123
00:03:57,690 --> 00:04:00,148
I'M SO SORRY.

124
00:03:57,690 --> 00:04:00,148
WILL YOU FORGIVE ME?

125
00:04:00,189 --> 00:04:01,272
YES, YES.

126
00:04:00,189 --> 00:04:01,272
YOU DO?

127
00:04:01,314 --> 00:04:02,690
YES!

128
00:04:02,731 --> 00:04:03,898
TOO.

129
00:04:02,731 --> 00:04:03,898
LOVE YOU!

130
00:04:05,189 --> 00:04:06,230
LET'S DO THIS.

131
00:04:05,189 --> 00:04:06,230
YES, LET'S DO THIS.

132
00:04:06,272 --> 00:04:08,230
WHAT? WHAT'S HAPPENING?

133
00:04:08,272 --> 00:04:09,481
NO, NO, NO, WE'RE GOING ...

134
00:04:08,272 --> 00:04:09,481
WE'RE GOING THROUGH THE TUNNEL.

135
00:04:08,272 --> 00:04:09,481
NO. GOD, NO.

136
00:04:08,272 --> 00:04:09,481
NO, NO, NO.

137
00:04:09,523 --> 00:04:10,815
OH, NO,

138
00:04:10,857 --> 00:04:12,481
NO! ALL RIGHT.

139
00:04:12,523 --> 00:04:13,230
YOU KNOW?

140
00:04:13,272 --> 00:04:14,648
YEP. I'M GOOD.

141
00:04:14,690 --> 00:04:16,230
UH, YEAH:

142
00:04:16,272 --> 00:04:17,272
N-N-NO. NO, NO! NO!

143
00:04:16,272 --> 00:04:17,272
N-N-NO! NO!

144
00:04:17,314 --> 00:04:18,439
N-N-NO! N-NO!

145
00:04:23,981 --> 00:04:26,230
WOULD'VE BEEN HEALED.

146
00:04:26,272 --> 00:04:28,314
MITCHELL?

147
00:04:26,272 --> 00:04:28,314
MITCHELL?

148
00:04:28,356 --> 00:04:30,272
NO! N-NO!

149
00:04:28,356 --> 00:04:30,272
N-N-NO! N-NO!

150
00:04:30,314 --> 00:04:31,523
OH, MY GOD! WHAT HAPPENED?

151
00:04:30,314 --> 00:04:31,523
WHAT HAPPENED?

152
00:04:31,564 --> 00:04:33,272
IT W... IT WAS TERRIBLE!

153
00:04:31,564 --> 00:04:33,272
YES.

154
00:04:33,314 --> 00:04:34,606
NO.

155
00:04:34,648 --> 00:04:36,690
NEEDS A TIE?

156
00:04:36,731 --> 00:04:38,230
OH, MY GOD.

157
00:04:36,731 --> 00:04:38,230
MITCHELL!

158
00:04:38,272 --> 00:04:39,397
UM...

159
00:04:38,272 --> 00:04:39,397
CAN YOU GIVE ME MY PHONE?

160
00:04:39,439 --> 00:04:41,064
'CAUSE I GOT TO, YOU KNOW,

161
00:04:41,106 --> 00:04:42,481
OH, GOD.

162
00:04:43,481 --> 00:04:44,898
OH, GOD!

163
00:04:44,939 --> 00:04:46,148
MY MEETING'S BEEN PUSHED UP.

164
00:04:44,939 --> 00:04:46,148
IT'S IN 15 MINUTES.

165
00:04:47,564 --> 00:04:48,857
HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY!

166
00:04:47,564 --> 00:04:48,857
LOOK AT ME.

167
00:04:48,898 --> 00:04:50,106
HUH?

168
00:04:48,898 --> 00:04:50,106
HEY, HEY.

169
00:04:50,148 --> 00:04:51,481
AND WE DON'T

170
00:04:51,523 --> 00:04:53,397
STOP IT!

171
00:04:56,648 --> 00:04:58,230
EVEN WHEN YOU'RE TRYING

172
00:04:58,272 --> 00:04:59,230
SO J...

173
00:04:59,272 --> 00:05:00,857
WHAT? WHY?

174
00:05:00,897 --> 00:05:02,439
YOU'VE DRAGGED ME SO FAR,

175
00:05:00,897 --> 00:05:02,439
WE'RE CLOSER TO MY OFFICE

176
00:05:03,773 --> 00:05:04,857
TAKE 'EM OFF!

177
00:05:04,897 --> 00:05:07,230
HE JUST WASN'T READY.

178
00:05:07,272 --> 00:05:08,731
BUT ME?

179
00:05:10,857 --> 00:05:14,148
HOW YOU HOLDING UP?

180
00:05:14,230 --> 00:05:15,230
Good.

181
00:05:15,272 --> 00:05:17,939
SO, I'M AT THE BEACH ...

182
00:05:17,981 --> 00:05:20,230
YOU WOULDN'T MIND WAITING

183
00:05:20,272 --> 00:05:21,731
FOR LUKE'S TUTOR.

184
00:05:21,773 --> 00:05:23,230
Actually, I would mind.

185
00:05:21,773 --> 00:05:23,230
I'd mind quite a bit.

186
00:05:23,272 --> 00:05:24,815
I'm kind of busy.

187
00:05:32,439 --> 00:05:33,939
WHY ARE WE STOPPING?

188
00:05:40,481 --> 00:05:43,230
WHAT HE'S BEEN MISSING.

189
00:05:58,272 --> 00:06:01,106
OHH. OH, MY GOSH:

190
00:05:58,272 --> 00:06:01,106
I THOUGHT I LOST YOU!

191
00:06:07,272 --> 00:06:08,314
ARE YOU SURE?

192
00:06:08,356 --> 00:06:11,064
WE'LL WALK HOME.

193
00:06:15,564 --> 00:06:17,648
PLEASE DON'T MAKE FUN OF ME

194
00:06:17,690 --> 00:06:20,314
NO, I WOULD NEVER:

195
00:06:23,564 --> 00:06:25,481
YOU DON'T DO IT

196
00:06:27,314 --> 00:06:29,690
OH.

197
00:06:29,731 --> 00:06:30,856
DID WHAT?

198
00:06:30,897 --> 00:06:32,314
UH, IT DOESN'T MATTER.

199
00:06:35,148 --> 00:06:37,439
BUT YOU'RE MORE SUBSTANTIAL

200
00:06:35,148 --> 00:06:37,439
AREN'T YOU?

201
00:06:39,272 --> 00:06:41,230
YOU KNOW WHAT?

202
00:06:39,272 --> 00:06:41,230
I'M BLOWING OFF JUDO TODAY.

203
00:06:41,272 --> 00:06:42,230
LET'S HANG OUT.

204
00:06:42,272 --> 00:06:43,439
WHAT SHOULD WE DO?

205
00:06:46,523 --> 00:06:47,897
GREAT!

206
00:06:47,939 --> 00:06:50,272
WE'RE GONNA WALK

207
00:06:55,272 --> 00:06:57,230
OW. OW!

208
00:06:59,481 --> 00:07:01,230
I-IT'S NOT JUST MY FEET.

209
00:07:01,272 --> 00:07:03,230
IT'S FROM WHEN I WALKED

210
00:07:03,272 --> 00:07:04,897
BECAUSE YOU WOULDN'T

211
00:07:04,939 --> 00:07:06,230
I'LL GIVE YOU BACK

212
00:07:11,272 --> 00:07:12,939
BUT IT'S PROBABLY BEST

213
00:07:11,272 --> 00:07:12,939
WE DIDN'T.

214
00:07:12,981 --> 00:07:15,230
THAT'S A PRETTY ANGRY LIP

215
00:07:15,272 --> 00:07:18,230
REALLY?

216
00:07:15,272 --> 00:07:18,230
UH-HUH.

217
00:07:18,272 --> 00:07:20,523
WOW.

218
00:07:18,272 --> 00:07:20,523
DOES EVERYBODY'S GET THIS RED?

219
00:07:20,564 --> 00:07:22,606
YOU HAD

220
00:07:27,148 --> 00:07:28,606
OH, MY GOSH!

221
00:07:28,648 --> 00:07:31,397
I ALREADY HAVE 100 LIKES

222
00:07:31,439 --> 00:07:34,856
UM, FYI, I'M ... I'M SORT OF

223
00:07:36,106 --> 00:07:38,230
400 PEOPLE LIKED THIS PHOTO:

224
00:07:40,730 --> 00:07:43,230
A PITHY "BLUE PERIOD" COMMENT,

225
00:07:46,690 --> 00:07:49,481
MY SNEAKERS BACK?

226
00:07:49,523 --> 00:07:51,230
OHH, I THREW THEM AWAY

227
00:07:54,730 --> 00:07:56,814
BUT I COULDN'T REMEMBER

228
00:07:56,856 --> 00:08:00,064
I'VE TRIED REALLY HARD

229
00:08:00,106 --> 00:08:01,314
WHAT'S GOING ON?

230
00:08:01,356 --> 00:08:03,439
OH, I JUST HAD SO MUCH FUN

231
00:08:01,356 --> 00:08:03,439
WITH YOU!

232
00:08:03,481 --> 00:08:05,148
WE DON'T DO THIS ENOUGH.

233
00:08:08,272 --> 00:08:10,023
UH-HUH.

234
00:08:10,064 --> 00:08:11,230
YOUR JUDO STUFF?

235
00:08:11,272 --> 00:08:13,148
UH YOU'RE NOT

236
00:08:13,189 --> 00:08:14,690
NO! NO! I AM! COME ON!

237
00:08:14,730 --> 00:08:17,230
OR SOMETHING!

238
00:08:18,272 --> 00:08:19,230
OKAY.

239
00:08:19,272 --> 00:08:21,230
LET'S JUST DO

240
00:08:22,314 --> 00:08:23,939
NOW, THIS WON'T WRINKLE MY TOP,

241
00:08:22,314 --> 00:08:23,939
WILL IT?

242
00:08:23,981 --> 00:08:25,730
OHH!

243
00:08:25,772 --> 00:08:26,939
WOW.

244
00:08:26,981 --> 00:08:28,314
THAT WAS ACTUALLY FUN!

245
00:08:30,272 --> 00:08:31,606
OH, NO!

246
00:08:31,648 --> 00:08:33,481
OH, MY GOSH:

247
00:08:33,523 --> 00:08:35,730
WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.

248
00:08:33,523 --> 00:08:35,730
AGAIN?

249
00:08:35,772 --> 00:08:38,023
OH, YEAH:

250
00:08:50,356 --> 00:08:53,272
OR YOUR FACE GETTING REDDER?

251
00:09:05,272 --> 00:09:07,523
WAS THAT?

252
00:09:07,564 --> 00:09:09,230
OH,

253
00:09:07,564 --> 00:09:09,230
I'M JUST GETTING STARTED!

254
00:09:09,272 --> 00:09:10,939
OHH! WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE

255
00:09:09,272 --> 00:09:10,939
SUCH A FREAK?

256
00:09:10,981 --> 00:09:12,230
STOP!

257
00:09:12,272 --> 00:09:13,314
MOM!

258
00:09:33,523 --> 00:09:36,730
WASN'T TAKING PICTURES OF JOE.

259
00:09:44,689 --> 00:09:47,230
OF A SATIRICAL CARTOON?

260
00:09:47,272 --> 00:09:49,605
HEY! UH, THEY'VE TAKEN DOWN

261
00:09:49,647 --> 00:09:51,272
NOW, CAN YOU JUST

262
00:09:49,647 --> 00:09:51,272
SUPPORT ME HERE?

263
00:09:55,523 --> 00:09:58,230
THEN TUNE ME OUT?

264
00:09:58,272 --> 00:09:59,897
IT'S NOT BOTHERING ME.

265
00:09:58,272 --> 00:09:59,897
STOP IT!

266
00:09:59,939 --> 00:10:01,230
DAD,

267
00:09:59,939 --> 00:10:01,230
TURN DOWN THAT SONG!

268
00:10:06,730 --> 00:10:07,689
MANNY?

269
00:10:07,730 --> 00:10:09,689
I-I'LL WALK HOME.

270
00:10:12,272 --> 00:10:14,897
WE ALMOST DIED:

271
00:10:12,272 --> 00:10:14,897
YEAH:

272
00:10:16,106 --> 00:10:17,481
YES, I'M SURE.

273
00:10:22,106 --> 00:10:23,230
AH, THE BICYCLE:

274
00:10:24,647 --> 00:10:27,230
YOUR PHONE GOT STOLEN?

275
00:10:27,272 --> 00:10:28,439
THIS IS JOE'S PHONE.

276
00:10:35,981 --> 00:10:39,230
CHOCOLATE-CHIP PANCAKES AGAIN?

277
00:10:41,272 --> 00:10:43,272
AY! iDIOS MÃ­O!

278
00:10:41,272 --> 00:10:43,272
PAPI?

279
00:10:43,314 --> 00:10:45,314
THIS WAS ALL PHIL'S FAULT,

280
00:10:43,314 --> 00:10:45,314
WASN'T IT?

281
00:10:45,356 --> 00:10:47,647
HE'S ALWAYS BLARING

282
00:10:45,356 --> 00:10:47,647
THAT DAMN NEW WAVE MUSIC!

283
00:10:47,689 --> 00:10:49,230
NO.

284
00:10:57,563 --> 00:10:58,939
HE DOESN'T NEED

285
00:11:05,897 --> 00:11:07,230
SO, THIS IS FIXED:

286
00:11:11,189 --> 00:11:13,230
I'D BE AVOIDING

287
00:11:13,272 --> 00:11:15,230
MOM,

288
00:11:17,188 --> 00:11:18,230
THAT'S IT. GET IN.

289
00:11:17,188 --> 00:11:18,230
NO, NO.

290
00:11:18,272 --> 00:11:19,272
NO, JAY, HE'S AFRAID!

291
00:11:19,314 --> 00:11:20,897
IT'S ONLY

292
00:11:20,939 --> 00:11:22,230
IN.

293
00:11:22,272 --> 00:11:26,230
HE'LL BE HAPPY AS A CLAM.

294
00:11:26,272 --> 00:11:27,897
AAH! MAMA!

295
00:11:31,522 --> 00:11:34,230
JAY.

296
00:11:34,272 --> 00:11:35,439
HE'S DRIVING.

297
00:11:34,272 --> 00:11:35,439
WHAT?

298
00:11:35,481 --> 00:11:37,314
WHAT? I-I CAN'T.

299
00:11:35,481 --> 00:11:37,314
YOU'RE DOING IT NOW.

300
00:11:38,647 --> 00:11:40,605
HE'S TERRIFIED

301
00:11:40,647 --> 00:11:43,148
NOW YOU'RE GONNA

302
00:11:43,188 --> 00:11:44,730
ALL OF US?

303
00:11:44,772 --> 00:11:46,689
CAN YOU NOT

304
00:11:44,772 --> 00:11:46,689
MAKE THIS FEAR WORSE?

305
00:11:50,314 --> 00:11:52,897
HE'D ONLY

306
00:11:56,480 --> 00:11:59,230
YOU DON'T WANT

307
00:11:56,480 --> 00:11:59,230
TO DO THIS RIGHT?

308
00:11:59,272 --> 00:12:00,272
NO, I REALLY DON'T.

309
00:12:00,314 --> 00:12:03,106
YOU KNOW WHAT?

310
00:12:00,314 --> 00:12:03,106
LET'S SWITCH.

311
00:12:03,148 --> 00:12:04,230
I'M GOING TO DRIVE.

312
00:12:04,272 --> 00:12:05,689
I'VE GOT A BOMBSHELL, MOM.

313
00:12:05,730 --> 00:12:08,230
AY, PAPI, THANK YOU:

314
00:12:08,272 --> 00:12:10,230
TO SAY

315
00:12:08,272 --> 00:12:10,230
WHEN WE'RE IN THIS POSITION.

316
00:12:10,272 --> 00:12:12,439
NO, I'VE DECIDED

317
00:12:10,272 --> 00:12:12,439
I'M NEVER DRIVING.

318
00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:14,856
UH ... UNH-UNH-UNH-UNH!

319
00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:14,856
NO WAY.

320
00:12:14,897 --> 00:12:16,230
YOU THERE.

321
00:12:16,272 --> 00:12:17,689
WE'RE DOING THIS MY WAY.

322
00:12:17,730 --> 00:12:20,897
AH, YEAH: 'CAUSE IT'S YOUR WAY

323
00:12:20,939 --> 00:12:22,314
OH, GOD.

324
00:12:23,480 --> 00:12:24,480
I'M BEING HIS DAD.

325
00:12:24,522 --> 00:12:26,314
OH, UH, I-I'M REALLY SCARED,

326
00:12:24,522 --> 00:12:26,314
JAY.

327
00:12:26,356 --> 00:12:28,480
THIS IS WHAT WE'RE FIXING.

328
00:12:50,272 --> 00:12:51,689
MAMA!

329
00:12:50,272 --> 00:12:51,689
AAH!

330
00:12:51,730 --> 00:12:53,272
THAT'S ANOTHER HABIT

331
00:12:51,730 --> 00:12:53,272
I WOULDN'T MIND BREAKING,

332
00:12:53,314 --> 00:12:56,230
RIGHT NOW WE...

333
00:12:56,272 --> 00:12:58,939
OH, WHAT AM I DOING?

334
00:13:03,438 --> 00:13:04,814
IT'S OKAY.

335
00:13:04,856 --> 00:13:06,397
OVER THERE! ON THE BIKE!

336
00:13:06,438 --> 00:13:08,397
THAT STOLE MY PHONE!

337
00:13:08,438 --> 00:13:09,314
I DON'T SEE ANYONE.

338
00:13:09,356 --> 00:13:11,230
YES!

339
00:13:09,356 --> 00:13:11,230
HE JUST TURNED THE CORNER!

340
00:13:11,272 --> 00:13:13,814
THE PHONE BURGLAR!

341
00:13:11,272 --> 00:13:13,814
HE'S GETTING AWAY!

342
00:13:13,856 --> 00:13:15,272
NOT THIS TIME:

343
00:13:15,314 --> 00:13:16,814
UP THERE TO THE LEFT!

344
00:13:23,480 --> 00:13:24,897
I DON'T SEE ANYONE!

345
00:13:24,939 --> 00:13:27,814
I DIDN'T SEE ANYONE EITHER.

346
00:13:27,856 --> 00:13:31,272
AROUND UNTIL HE'S 40.

347
00:13:31,314 --> 00:13:34,230
THAN MANNY'S FEAR

348
00:13:36,272 --> 00:13:38,023
OH, NO! HE GOT AWAY!

349
00:13:40,272 --> 00:13:42,230
A FRICKIN' RUSH!

350
00:13:42,272 --> 00:13:44,897
BUT WE'RE NOT GIVING UP.

351
00:13:42,272 --> 00:13:44,897
WE'RE GONNA FIND THAT GUY.

352
00:13:44,939 --> 00:13:45,814
NO!

353
00:13:45,856 --> 00:13:46,939
ABOUT THIS?

354
00:13:46,981 --> 00:13:47,814
I'M WALKING HOME.

355
00:13:53,314 --> 00:13:54,814
I CAN'T EVEN HEAR HIM

356
00:13:53,314 --> 00:13:54,814
IT'S SO LOUD.

357
00:13:54,856 --> 00:13:56,396
CAN EVERYBODY JUST SHUT UP?

358
00:13:56,438 --> 00:13:58,148
Hello. Is this Phil Dumpster?

359
00:13:58,188 --> 00:13:59,230
GIL?

360
00:14:00,355 --> 00:14:01,814
Is that your hot wife

361
00:14:00,355 --> 00:14:01,814
I hear?

362
00:14:01,856 --> 00:14:03,314
Hey, is she still taking

363
00:14:01,856 --> 00:14:03,314
those yoga classes?

364
00:14:05,355 --> 00:14:07,730
W-w-wait. Wait. Real quick.

365
00:14:05,355 --> 00:14:07,730
2:45 SALES MEETING: AND I

366
00:14:07,772 --> 00:14:09,272
The listing at 225 Cedar Street,

367
00:14:07,772 --> 00:14:09,272
it's mine now.

368
00:14:07,772 --> 00:14:09,272
YOU POACHED MY LISTING?

369
00:14:09,314 --> 00:14:10,730
Poached it, seasoned it,

370
00:14:10,772 --> 00:14:13,314
and covered it in Thorpe-andaise

371
00:14:10,772 --> 00:14:13,314
sauce, my friend.

372
00:14:13,355 --> 00:14:15,230
OH, MY GOD, JUST GET HER

373
00:14:13,355 --> 00:14:15,230
You should thank me, Dumpy.

374
00:14:15,272 --> 00:14:17,023
You're back in second place

375
00:14:15,272 --> 00:14:17,023
with your favorite view...

376
00:14:17,064 --> 00:14:18,730
DON'T BE SUCH A BIG BABY.

377
00:14:17,064 --> 00:14:18,730
UGH.

378
00:14:17,064 --> 00:14:18,730
my sweet behind.

379
00:14:18,772 --> 00:14:22,230
HAVE TO BE SO DRAMATIC?

380
00:14:25,272 --> 00:14:27,023
WHY ARE WE STOPPING?

381
00:14:27,064 --> 00:14:28,522
OHH.

382
00:14:28,563 --> 00:14:32,064
OH, MY GOD!

383
00:14:33,272 --> 00:14:34,314
WHAT'S TO TELL?

384
00:14:39,272 --> 00:14:40,396
UM, THERE WAS A TRUCK!

385
00:14:39,272 --> 00:14:40,396
THAT WAS CRAZY!

386
00:14:40,438 --> 00:14:41,897
WHERE DID IT EVEN COME FROM?

387
00:14:41,939 --> 00:14:43,522
YOU DON'T SEE THAT TRUCK

388
00:14:41,939 --> 00:14:43,522
COMING TOWARDS YOU?

389
00:14:43,563 --> 00:14:45,230
LET'S NOT OVERREACT.

390
00:14:45,272 --> 00:14:46,313
WHAT?

391
00:14:45,272 --> 00:14:46,313
DAD!

392
00:14:46,355 --> 00:14:48,230
WE WERE ALMOST JUST KILLED!

393
00:14:46,355 --> 00:14:48,230
YES!

394
00:14:48,272 --> 00:14:50,647
EXACTLY. WHICH MEANS

395
00:14:48,272 --> 00:14:50,647
WE'RE ALL JUST FINE.

396
00:14:50,689 --> 00:14:52,605
YOU AREN'T

397
00:14:50,689 --> 00:14:52,605
THE LEAST BIT UPSET?

398
00:14:52,647 --> 00:14:54,480
IT'S GONNA TAKE MORE THAN THAT

399
00:14:58,689 --> 00:15:01,230
BUT SOMETIMES IT'S HARD TO KNOW

400
00:14:58,689 --> 00:15:01,230
WHAT YOU'RE FEELING.

401
00:15:05,522 --> 00:15:07,689
MAY BE

402
00:15:09,272 --> 00:15:10,689
DON'T ASK.

403
00:15:10,730 --> 00:15:12,939
SO, WE'RE GETTING

404
00:15:12,981 --> 00:15:14,230
IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE EGGSHELL,

405
00:15:14,272 --> 00:15:15,897
BUT, OH, IT'S NOT EGGSHELL ...

406
00:15:14,272 --> 00:15:15,897
IT'S WHITE.

407
00:15:15,939 --> 00:15:18,689
I'M LAYING

408
00:15:18,730 --> 00:15:21,271
"OH, IT'S FINE,"

409
00:15:25,772 --> 00:15:27,230
UH, JUST ONCE: I WOULD LIKE

410
00:15:27,271 --> 00:15:29,271
I'M CONSTANTLY STROLLING IN

411
00:15:31,438 --> 00:15:33,522
SOMETIMES I'D LIKE TO BE

412
00:15:33,563 --> 00:15:35,230
RIGHT?

413
00:15:33,563 --> 00:15:35,230
WHAT?

414
00:15:35,271 --> 00:15:37,106
WHY ARE WE STOPPING?

415
00:15:37,148 --> 00:15:39,230
I'M ... I'M VERY CONFUSED,

416
00:15:43,897 --> 00:15:47,148
OH, HEY, PHIL:

417
00:15:43,897 --> 00:15:47,148
I'M SORRY.

418
00:15:47,189 --> 00:15:48,647
OH, NO,

419
00:15:50,689 --> 00:15:52,230
THERE'S NO HARD FEELINGS.

420
00:15:53,271 --> 00:15:55,023
HERE'S

421
00:15:55,064 --> 00:15:58,148
AFTER HE'S RIPPED THEM OFF.

422
00:16:04,313 --> 00:16:06,229
WHICH YOU'LL NEED

423
00:16:06,271 --> 00:16:07,814
IT'S OKAY.

424
00:16:07,856 --> 00:16:11,730
IT'S SAD, REALLY,

425
00:16:13,148 --> 00:16:14,647
LET'S KEEP THIS CIVIL.

426
00:16:14,689 --> 00:16:16,313
OH, BY THE WAY: IF YOU EVER

427
00:16:16,355 --> 00:16:17,814
I'LL KILL YOU.

428
00:16:17,856 --> 00:16:20,229
SORRY:

429
00:16:25,271 --> 00:16:27,023
HERE'S A LIST

430
00:16:27,064 --> 00:16:30,106
I'LL BE IN THE OFFICE AT 9:00 ...

431
00:16:30,148 --> 00:16:32,229
UH, 10:00.

432
00:16:32,271 --> 00:16:34,229
COME FROM?

433
00:16:34,271 --> 00:16:36,522
LIFE'S TOO SHORT

434
00:16:36,563 --> 00:16:39,605
PRINCESS?

435
00:16:39,647 --> 00:16:40,522
OH, MY.

436
00:16:42,897 --> 00:16:45,148
SO...

437
00:16:47,271 --> 00:16:48,271
THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO.

438
00:16:48,313 --> 00:16:50,605
I CAN'T GO FOR THAT.

439
00:16:57,271 --> 00:16:59,023
ROB, IS IT?

440
00:16:59,064 --> 00:17:00,148
THAT'S INTERESTING.

441
00:17:00,188 --> 00:17:02,271
HERE'S HOW

442
00:17:02,313 --> 00:17:04,480
WE DON'T LEAVE

443
00:17:07,106 --> 00:17:08,730
I THINK WE'VE COVERED

444
00:17:12,355 --> 00:17:15,897
I DON'T THINK YOU WANT ME

445
00:17:12,355 --> 00:17:15,897
GIVING THEM ANY...

446
00:17:19,563 --> 00:17:20,939
AND IT'S JUST ME TODAY.

447
00:17:20,981 --> 00:17:23,106
IS IT?

448
00:17:26,313 --> 00:17:28,772
[ HALL & OATES'

449
00:17:26,313 --> 00:17:28,772
"I CAN'T GO FOR THAT" PLAYS ]

450
00:17:40,313 --> 00:17:42,605
IS PHIL SEXY?

451
00:17:43,730 --> 00:17:45,271
HEY.

452
00:17:45,313 --> 00:17:46,730
A LITTLE CRAZY WITH ME?

453
00:17:46,772 --> 00:17:49,229
WHAT? NO. WHAT? NO.

454
00:17:50,563 --> 00:17:51,897
Phil, honey, how you holding up?

455
00:17:53,188 --> 00:17:54,313
I'm at the beach ...

456
00:17:53,188 --> 00:17:54,313
long story.

457
00:17:54,355 --> 00:17:55,689
I was hoping

458
00:17:54,355 --> 00:17:55,689
you wouldn't mind

459
00:17:55,730 --> 00:17:57,396
waiting at the house

460
00:17:55,730 --> 00:17:57,396
for Luke's tutor.

461
00:17:57,438 --> 00:17:58,897
I'D MIND QUITE A BIT.

462
00:17:58,939 --> 00:18:00,229
I'M KIND OF BUSY.

463
00:17:58,939 --> 00:18:00,229
Okay.

464
00:18:00,271 --> 00:18:01,647
CAM, THERE'S SOMETHING

465
00:18:01,689 --> 00:18:03,939
THAT I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO.

466
00:18:03,981 --> 00:18:05,396
ALWAYS?

467
00:18:05,438 --> 00:18:07,939
WE'RE GONNA WANT TO PUT A

468
00:18:15,522 --> 00:18:18,023
IT'S SPRING BREAK '92

469
00:18:15,522 --> 00:18:18,023
ALL OVER AGAIN!

470
00:18:19,689 --> 00:18:21,313
IT'S SUPPOSED TO

471
00:18:21,355 --> 00:18:22,814
I DON'T THINK

472
00:18:21,355 --> 00:18:22,814
THIS ONE'S A SPITTER.

473
00:18:22,856 --> 00:18:24,229
OHH.

474
00:18:24,271 --> 00:18:25,438
UH, I SPOKE TOO SOON:

475
00:18:25,480 --> 00:18:27,647
YOU THINK? THAT'S IT.

476
00:18:29,772 --> 00:18:32,229
I'M A FIRM BELIEVER

477
00:18:32,271 --> 00:18:33,814
BUT YOU ARE

478
00:18:33,856 --> 00:18:35,647
NO, I'M IN CONTROL ...

479
00:18:40,147 --> 00:18:42,023
OH.

480
00:18:40,147 --> 00:18:42,023
UH, SHE'S NERVOUS.

481
00:18:53,480 --> 00:18:58,229
BUT AT LEAST HE'S NOT

482
00:19:06,271 --> 00:19:08,897
AND THERE'S NOTHING

483
00:19:08,939 --> 00:19:10,939
I'M NOT SAYING ANYTHING.

484
00:19:08,939 --> 00:19:10,939
WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?

485
00:19:13,271 --> 00:19:14,730
MOM, DAD!

486
00:19:14,772 --> 00:19:16,522
IN THE LIVING ROOM!

487
00:19:16,563 --> 00:19:17,939
IT'S NOT A C...

488
00:19:17,981 --> 00:19:19,229
I-I JUST CAN'T.

489
00:19:19,271 --> 00:19:21,147
I SEE YOU'VE ALL MET

490
00:19:24,355 --> 00:19:26,897
BY A CHILDREN'S HOSPITAL.

491
00:19:29,355 --> 00:19:31,480
DIDN'T HIT ME THIS MORNING ...

492
00:19:37,271 --> 00:19:38,939
OH.

493
00:19:37,271 --> 00:19:38,939
MM.

494
00:19:38,981 --> 00:19:41,105
HUH.

495
00:19:41,147 --> 00:19:43,313
I GUESS I'M NOT

496
00:19:41,147 --> 00:19:43,313
AM I?

497
00:19:43,355 --> 00:19:44,897
ISN'T IT?

498
00:19:52,271 --> 00:19:55,229
DAD, ARE YOU OKAY?

499
00:19:55,271 --> 00:19:57,229
DON'T YOU ALL SEE

500
00:19:55,271 --> 00:19:57,229
WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

501
00:20:02,271 --> 00:20:04,063
AW.

502
00:20:04,105 --> 00:20:05,229
AW, DADDY:

503
00:20:05,271 --> 00:20:06,730
OH, HONEY:

504
00:20:11,563 --> 00:20:13,313
DID IT?

505
00:20:14,730 --> 00:20:17,229
BUT I'M GONNA NEED YOU

506
00:20:18,939 --> 00:20:20,689
SHE'S A BITER.

507
00:20:18,939 --> 00:20:20,689
I KNOW:

508
00:20:20,730 --> 00:20:23,689
AS SOON AS WE'RE DONE

509
00:20:29,772 --> 00:20:32,147
AW, DAD.

510
00:20:29,772 --> 00:20:32,147
HEY.

511
00:20:33,438 --> 00:20:35,229
AWW.

512
00:20:33,438 --> 00:20:35,229
YOU.

513
00:20:41,188 --> 00:20:44,229
LADY!

514
00:20:48,647 --> 00:20:51,647
HEL... YES, I WOULD LIKE

515
00:20:57,856 --> 00:21:01,147
HEY, YOU'RE HOME EARLY.

516
00:20:57,856 --> 00:21:01,147
WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?

517
00:21:01,188 --> 00:21:02,229
DOESN'T MATTER.

518
00:21:02,271 --> 00:21:03,689
SO, I CALLED

519
00:21:06,522 --> 00:21:07,897
OH, WELL:

520
00:21:06,522 --> 00:21:07,897
IT MUST'VE WORKED

521
00:21:07,938 --> 00:21:10,605
BECAUSE THEY'RE TAKING AWAY

522
00:21:11,897 --> 00:21:14,522
OOH! WHO'S THIS GUY?

523
00:21:16,188 --> 00:21:18,022
OOH.

524
00:21:16,188 --> 00:21:18,022
AH-CHOO!

525
00:21:18,063 --> 00:21:19,229
AH-CHOO!

526
00:21:19,271 --> 00:21:20,730
OH, D...

527
00:21:19,271 --> 00:21:20,730
WHAT IS ALL OVER YOU?

528
00:21:20,772 --> 00:21:23,105
AH-CHOO!

529
00:21:26,147 --> 00:21:29,147
Captions by VITAC :

