1 00:00:02,476 --> 00:00:04,019 Oh, thank God, I smell coffee. 2 00:00:04,019 --> 00:00:06,606 This morning has gotten off 3 00:00:04,019 --> 00:00:06,606 to a bit of a rocky... 4 00:00:06,606 --> 00:00:08,107 Horror Picture Show. 5 00:00:08,107 --> 00:00:09,859 What did you do to your face? 6 00:00:09,859 --> 00:00:12,194 Just a little color, 7 00:00:09,859 --> 00:00:12,194 to make my eyes pop. 8 00:00:12,194 --> 00:00:14,571 Like yours are now. 9 00:00:14,571 --> 00:00:16,323 Is this how we find out 10 00:00:14,571 --> 00:00:16,323 you're transitioning? 11 00:00:16,323 --> 00:00:17,617 Oh, please don't 12 00:00:16,323 --> 00:00:17,617 pick a young name. 13 00:00:17,617 --> 00:00:19,243 The world doesn't need 14 00:00:17,617 --> 00:00:19,243 a 50-year-old Jasmine. 15 00:00:19,243 --> 00:00:22,037 Trust me, this'll look 16 00:00:19,243 --> 00:00:22,037 completely normal on camera. 17 00:00:22,037 --> 00:00:25,540 This just in ... 18 00:00:22,037 --> 00:00:25,540 I'm gonna be on the news. 19 00:00:25,540 --> 00:00:27,627 They're doing a segment 20 00:00:25,540 --> 00:00:27,627 on the real-estate market, 21 00:00:27,627 --> 00:00:28,919 and I'm their local expert. 22 00:00:28,919 --> 00:00:30,963 Back to you, Claire. 23 00:00:30,963 --> 00:00:34,466 I'm still reeling from the last 24 00:00:30,963 --> 00:00:34,466 time you were on the news. 25 00:00:34,466 --> 00:00:36,301 And while people 26 00:00:34,466 --> 00:00:36,301 have found all sorts of ways 27 00:00:36,301 --> 00:00:38,888 to beat the heat, 28 00:00:36,301 --> 00:00:38,888 one local man is using his head. 29 00:00:38,888 --> 00:00:41,724 Is it warm out? 30 00:00:38,888 --> 00:00:41,724 I hadn't noticed. 31 00:00:41,724 --> 00:00:44,351 Oop. Looks like I need 32 00:00:41,724 --> 00:00:44,351 to re-apply. 33 00:00:44,351 --> 00:00:45,519 To clown college? 34 00:00:49,231 --> 00:00:50,608 Haley, go with him. 35 00:00:50,608 --> 00:00:52,276 Make sure he gets 36 00:00:50,608 --> 00:00:52,276 all that stuff off his face. 37 00:00:52,276 --> 00:00:54,236 I'll pack paper towels 38 00:00:52,276 --> 00:00:54,236 and a squeegee. 39 00:00:54,236 --> 00:00:56,530 Ugh. What is wrong with me? 40 00:00:54,236 --> 00:00:56,530 I feel so fuzzy. 41 00:00:56,530 --> 00:01:00,075 Oh, stop being so hard on 42 00:00:56,530 --> 00:01:00,075 yourself. It's just arm hair. 43 00:01:00,075 --> 00:01:01,911 I can't figure out this 44 00:01:00,075 --> 00:01:01,911 crossword puzzle. 45 00:01:01,911 --> 00:01:04,288 I ... I think mono 46 00:01:01,911 --> 00:01:04,288 turned my mind to mush. 47 00:01:04,288 --> 00:01:05,414 What's the clue? 48 00:01:04,288 --> 00:01:05,414 Maybe I can help. 49 00:01:06,916 --> 00:01:08,834 Thanks, Mom. 50 00:01:06,916 --> 00:01:08,834 Feels good to laugh. 51 00:01:08,834 --> 00:01:10,169 What is so funny? 52 00:01:10,169 --> 00:01:11,837 I am a well-read 53 00:01:10,169 --> 00:01:11,837 college graduate. 54 00:01:11,837 --> 00:01:14,173 I think I'm capable of 55 00:01:11,837 --> 00:01:14,173 doing a crossword puzzle. 56 00:01:14,173 --> 00:01:15,507 Okay, professor. 57 00:01:15,507 --> 00:01:19,094 Six-letter word, 58 00:01:15,507 --> 00:01:19,094 Archimedes' exclamation. 59 00:01:19,094 --> 00:01:21,471 I don't like you right now. 60 00:01:21,471 --> 00:01:23,182 Ugh. Why can't I get this? 61 00:01:23,182 --> 00:01:25,100 Archimedes' exclamation. 62 00:01:25,100 --> 00:01:26,602 Eureka. 63 00:01:26,602 --> 00:01:28,520 We may never know 64 00:01:26,602 --> 00:01:28,520 the answer to that clue, 65 00:01:28,520 --> 00:01:30,690 but it made me realize 66 00:01:28,520 --> 00:01:30,690 this was my chance 67 00:01:30,690 --> 00:01:32,566 to finally beat 68 00:01:30,690 --> 00:01:32,566 Alex at Scrabble. 69 00:01:32,566 --> 00:01:34,610 I have never beaten her. 70 00:01:34,610 --> 00:01:36,946 She's not the nicest winner. 71 00:01:36,946 --> 00:01:38,280 I win, you lose! 72 00:01:40,658 --> 00:01:42,242 Win, win, win, 73 00:01:40,658 --> 00:01:42,242 win, win, win, win! 74 00:01:42,242 --> 00:01:43,368 Lose, lose, lose, 75 00:01:42,242 --> 00:01:43,368 lose, lose! 76 00:01:57,507 --> 00:02:00,510 - Thank you for bweakfast. 77 00:01:57,507 --> 00:02:00,510 - You're welcome, sweetie. 78 00:02:00,510 --> 00:02:04,181 Did you hear that? 79 00:02:00,510 --> 00:02:04,181 "Bweakfast." 80 00:02:04,181 --> 00:02:07,559 It's a good thing that we're 81 00:02:04,181 --> 00:02:07,559 taking him to speech therapy. 82 00:02:07,559 --> 00:02:12,607 I want everybody to understand 83 00:02:07,559 --> 00:02:12,607 every single thing he says. 84 00:02:12,607 --> 00:02:15,359 Do you want 85 00:02:12,607 --> 00:02:15,359 marmalade on your brioche toast? 86 00:02:15,359 --> 00:02:16,861 Not a clue. 87 00:02:16,861 --> 00:02:19,154 You're probably right to nip 88 00:02:16,861 --> 00:02:19,154 that speech problem in the bud. 89 00:02:19,154 --> 00:02:20,948 Mitchell had a lisp 90 00:02:19,154 --> 00:02:20,948 we let slide. 91 00:02:20,948 --> 00:02:22,700 Now we got a lifetime 92 00:02:20,948 --> 00:02:22,700 of "What if?" 93 00:02:22,700 --> 00:02:24,034 That is so offensive. 94 00:02:24,034 --> 00:02:26,370 A lisp doesn't make you gay. 95 00:02:26,370 --> 00:02:30,040 Being gay makes you lisp. 96 00:02:30,040 --> 00:02:32,877 Well, I finished the video 97 00:02:30,040 --> 00:02:32,877 for my Juilliard application. 98 00:02:32,877 --> 00:02:34,336 I think they're 99 00:02:32,877 --> 00:02:34,336 going to be blown away. 100 00:02:34,336 --> 00:02:35,921 Art school, huh? 101 00:02:34,336 --> 00:02:35,921 Well, you can always 102 00:02:35,921 --> 00:02:37,506 sell oranges 103 00:02:35,921 --> 00:02:37,506 by the side of the road. 104 00:02:37,506 --> 00:02:38,674 Don't listen to him. 105 00:02:38,674 --> 00:02:40,926 Go to your art school, 106 00:02:38,674 --> 00:02:40,926 be a playwright. 107 00:02:40,926 --> 00:02:41,761 Thank you. 108 00:02:41,761 --> 00:02:44,764 You can live here 109 00:02:41,761 --> 00:02:44,764 as long as you want. 110 00:02:58,068 --> 00:03:00,320 You copied that from that 111 00:02:58,068 --> 00:03:00,320 play "Hamilton," right? 112 00:03:00,320 --> 00:03:01,906 I'm not sure "copied" 113 00:03:00,320 --> 00:03:01,906 is the word. 114 00:03:01,906 --> 00:03:03,240 It's more of an homage. 115 00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:05,743 Well, I homaged it about 116 00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:05,743 two weeks on "Jay Talking." 117 00:03:05,743 --> 00:03:06,827 You saw that episode, right? 118 00:03:06,827 --> 00:03:08,746 - Okay. 119 00:03:06,827 --> 00:03:08,746 - I rhymed "rice pudding" 120 00:03:08,746 --> 00:03:10,205 with "Cuba Gooding." 121 00:03:10,205 --> 00:03:12,708 Both delicious, by the way. 122 00:03:12,708 --> 00:03:14,293 Oh, good God. 123 00:03:14,293 --> 00:03:16,045 There are thousands 124 00:03:14,293 --> 00:03:16,045 of "Hamilton" parodies, 125 00:03:16,045 --> 00:03:17,963 and half of them 126 00:03:16,045 --> 00:03:17,963 are college applications. 127 00:03:17,963 --> 00:03:20,215 It's okay, Papi. 128 00:03:17,963 --> 00:03:20,215 Maybe the people in New York 129 00:03:20,215 --> 00:03:22,051 haven't heard 130 00:03:20,215 --> 00:03:22,051 about "Hamilton." 131 00:03:22,051 --> 00:03:24,679 The deadline for 132 00:03:22,051 --> 00:03:24,679 early admission is tomorrow. 133 00:03:24,679 --> 00:03:26,513 I'll never come up with 134 00:03:24,679 --> 00:03:26,513 something great by then. 135 00:03:26,513 --> 00:03:28,432 Yes, you will, 136 00:03:26,513 --> 00:03:28,432 and I'll help. 137 00:03:28,432 --> 00:03:29,767 You'd do that for me? 138 00:03:29,767 --> 00:03:31,351 Anything for you, kid. 139 00:03:31,351 --> 00:03:33,312 I got to get this kid 140 00:03:31,351 --> 00:03:33,312 out of the house. 141 00:03:33,312 --> 00:03:34,730 All his crazy quirks. 142 00:03:34,730 --> 00:03:36,190 The farther away, the better. 143 00:03:36,190 --> 00:03:40,235 I keep leaving brochures 144 00:03:36,190 --> 00:03:40,235 around for schools at sea. 145 00:03:40,235 --> 00:03:42,237 All right, carb up, buddy. 146 00:03:42,237 --> 00:03:43,363 Tackle these pancakes 147 00:03:43,363 --> 00:03:45,825 like it's fourth and goal 148 00:03:43,363 --> 00:03:45,825 on the one-yard line. 149 00:03:47,159 --> 00:03:47,993 Good one, Coach. 150 00:03:47,993 --> 00:03:50,412 Life's more fun when you put 151 00:03:47,993 --> 00:03:50,412 stuff in football terms. 152 00:03:50,412 --> 00:03:51,831 Pancakes, yay! 153 00:03:51,831 --> 00:03:53,958 Oh, uh, we're actually 154 00:03:51,831 --> 00:03:53,958 out of those. 155 00:03:53,958 --> 00:03:55,250 You can have the rest. 156 00:03:55,250 --> 00:03:57,252 No, no! We put some 157 00:03:55,250 --> 00:03:57,252 performance supplements in there 158 00:03:57,252 --> 00:03:58,629 that could mess with 159 00:03:57,252 --> 00:03:58,629 you as a lady. 160 00:03:58,629 --> 00:03:59,672 What else is there? 161 00:03:59,672 --> 00:04:01,465 Well, I'm going to 162 00:03:59,672 --> 00:04:01,465 the store later. 163 00:04:01,465 --> 00:04:02,925 In the meantime, 164 00:04:01,465 --> 00:04:02,925 you can have some fruit. 165 00:04:02,925 --> 00:04:05,177 That's real? I thought 166 00:04:02,925 --> 00:04:05,177 it was just for show. 167 00:04:05,177 --> 00:04:07,722 My star player Dwight 168 00:04:05,177 --> 00:04:07,722 has been living with us 169 00:04:07,722 --> 00:04:08,931 ever since his father 170 00:04:08,931 --> 00:04:11,308 was transferred to 171 00:04:08,931 --> 00:04:11,308 an army base in Florida. 172 00:04:11,308 --> 00:04:13,686 He's doing his part 173 00:04:11,308 --> 00:04:13,686 for our country, 174 00:04:13,686 --> 00:04:16,981 so I thought I could do 175 00:04:13,686 --> 00:04:16,981 my part for our team. 176 00:04:16,981 --> 00:04:19,108 Who's to say who 177 00:04:16,981 --> 00:04:19,108 the bigger hero is. 178 00:04:19,108 --> 00:04:21,151 I will. He is. 179 00:04:21,151 --> 00:04:23,946 I've had to wake up a half hour 180 00:04:21,151 --> 00:04:23,946 earlier to use the bathroom ... 181 00:04:23,946 --> 00:04:25,906 The soldier is the hero. 182 00:04:25,906 --> 00:04:27,532 Ugh. 183 00:04:25,906 --> 00:04:27,532 What are we gonna do? 184 00:04:27,532 --> 00:04:28,868 Oh, sweetie, I know. 185 00:04:28,868 --> 00:04:30,620 - Ready to go? 186 00:04:28,868 --> 00:04:30,620 - Yes! Yes! 187 00:04:30,620 --> 00:04:32,454 Dwight and I 188 00:04:30,620 --> 00:04:32,454 are going shopping. 189 00:04:32,454 --> 00:04:34,539 He's gonna help me pick out 190 00:04:32,454 --> 00:04:34,539 some cool new kicks. 191 00:04:34,539 --> 00:04:36,626 Like Richard Gere taking 192 00:04:34,539 --> 00:04:36,626 Julia Roberts to the store. 193 00:04:36,626 --> 00:04:38,961 That is right. We watched 194 00:04:36,626 --> 00:04:38,961 "Pretty Woman" last night. 195 00:04:40,671 --> 00:04:44,091 I guess that would've been 196 00:04:40,671 --> 00:04:44,091 my window to eat something. 197 00:04:44,091 --> 00:04:47,094 Okay, hold still. 198 00:04:44,091 --> 00:04:47,094 You have very deep-set eyes. 199 00:04:47,094 --> 00:04:49,388 In college, they called 200 00:04:47,094 --> 00:04:49,388 my "The Raccoon." 201 00:04:49,388 --> 00:04:51,223 Although, that could've been 202 00:04:49,388 --> 00:04:51,223 because I climbed in 203 00:04:51,223 --> 00:04:54,393 through the doggy door 204 00:04:51,223 --> 00:04:54,393 at Zeta house and stole a pie. 205 00:04:54,393 --> 00:04:55,603 My God. 206 00:04:55,603 --> 00:04:57,521 I'm beautiful. 207 00:04:57,521 --> 00:04:59,815 Honey, you could do this 208 00:04:57,521 --> 00:04:59,815 for a living. 209 00:04:59,815 --> 00:05:00,983 I have thought about it. 210 00:05:00,983 --> 00:05:03,068 I've been practicing on 211 00:05:00,983 --> 00:05:03,068 people since Luke was 3. 212 00:05:03,068 --> 00:05:04,987 Mo-o-o-o-ther nature. 213 00:05:04,987 --> 00:05:06,656 You're not gonna believe 214 00:05:04,987 --> 00:05:06,656 who's behind you. 215 00:05:06,656 --> 00:05:08,282 Rainer Shine! 216 00:05:06,656 --> 00:05:08,282 Who? 217 00:05:08,282 --> 00:05:10,450 The weatherman. 218 00:05:08,282 --> 00:05:10,450 Don't you watch the news? 219 00:05:10,450 --> 00:05:12,161 Yeah, at the gas station. 220 00:05:12,161 --> 00:05:14,038 He's coming this way. 221 00:05:12,161 --> 00:05:14,038 Just... 222 00:05:14,038 --> 00:05:15,205 Whoa, careful now. 223 00:05:15,205 --> 00:05:16,749 There's a stipulation 224 00:05:15,205 --> 00:05:16,749 in my contract ... 225 00:05:16,749 --> 00:05:18,250 I have to be 226 00:05:16,749 --> 00:05:18,250 the best-looking guy here. 227 00:05:18,250 --> 00:05:19,960 Stop it. 228 00:05:19,960 --> 00:05:21,086 Rainer Shine. 229 00:05:21,086 --> 00:05:23,547 It's, just, 230 00:05:21,086 --> 00:05:23,547 s-so nice to meet you. 231 00:05:23,547 --> 00:05:24,924 That isn't your 232 00:05:23,547 --> 00:05:24,924 real name, is it? 233 00:05:24,924 --> 00:05:26,550 Ow, I'm not letting you 234 00:05:24,924 --> 00:05:26,550 behind that curtain. 235 00:05:26,550 --> 00:05:28,135 That's my name, 236 00:05:26,550 --> 00:05:28,135 and these are my teeth. 237 00:05:28,135 --> 00:05:29,219 My name's Phil Dunphy. 238 00:05:29,219 --> 00:05:30,721 I'm doing a little 239 00:05:29,219 --> 00:05:30,721 real-estate segment. 240 00:05:30,721 --> 00:05:32,139 Could become a regular thing. 241 00:05:32,139 --> 00:05:35,559 This is my make-up 242 00:05:32,139 --> 00:05:35,559 artist/daughter, Haley Dunphy. 243 00:05:35,559 --> 00:05:37,061 It is a pleasure. 244 00:05:35,559 --> 00:05:37,061 You know, I think 245 00:05:37,061 --> 00:05:39,563 you sold my neighbor's 246 00:05:37,061 --> 00:05:39,563 house ... Doris Jacobs. 247 00:05:39,563 --> 00:05:42,066 Uh, white, mid-century, 248 00:05:39,563 --> 00:05:42,066 big back porch? 249 00:05:42,066 --> 00:05:43,192 That's her. 250 00:05:43,192 --> 00:05:45,027 I need to wash my hands. 251 00:05:43,192 --> 00:05:45,027 Where's the restroom? 252 00:05:45,027 --> 00:05:46,486 Oh, of course. 253 00:05:45,027 --> 00:05:46,486 You're gonna want to 254 00:05:46,486 --> 00:05:48,656 go down that hallway, push 255 00:05:46,486 --> 00:05:48,656 through the big double doors. 256 00:05:48,656 --> 00:05:50,115 You're gonna see some 257 00:05:48,656 --> 00:05:50,115 air vents on the way there. 258 00:05:50,115 --> 00:05:51,366 It's just past 259 00:05:50,115 --> 00:05:51,366 that cold-air system. 260 00:05:51,366 --> 00:05:52,785 Bring a sweater. 261 00:05:52,785 --> 00:05:54,578 It tends to get a little chilly 262 00:05:52,785 --> 00:05:54,578 in that neck of the woods. 263 00:05:54,578 --> 00:05:56,288 Wow. 264 00:05:54,578 --> 00:05:56,288 Wow. 265 00:05:56,288 --> 00:05:57,414 Nice shooting the breeze 266 00:05:56,288 --> 00:05:57,414 with you, Phil. 267 00:05:57,414 --> 00:06:00,125 You too. 268 00:05:57,414 --> 00:06:00,125 Hey, uh, listen. 269 00:06:00,125 --> 00:06:01,335 This might be kind weird, 270 00:06:01,335 --> 00:06:03,170 but would you ever 271 00:06:01,335 --> 00:06:03,170 want to grab a beer? 272 00:06:03,170 --> 00:06:04,129 Sure. 273 00:06:03,170 --> 00:06:04,129 Sounds like fun. 274 00:06:04,129 --> 00:06:05,673 All right! 275 00:06:05,673 --> 00:06:07,007 Here you go. Oh! 276 00:06:05,673 --> 00:06:07,007 C... call me three times. 277 00:06:07,007 --> 00:06:08,175 I'm kidding. 278 00:06:08,175 --> 00:06:09,844 Just call me once. 279 00:06:08,175 --> 00:06:09,844 Tonight ... if you're around. 280 00:06:09,844 --> 00:06:11,929 I'll see if I can squeeze 281 00:06:09,844 --> 00:06:11,929 you into my 10-day outlook. 282 00:06:11,929 --> 00:06:13,472 Okay. 283 00:06:16,266 --> 00:06:18,310 Do meet your heroes. 284 00:06:18,310 --> 00:06:19,729 What have you got? 285 00:06:19,729 --> 00:06:21,480 What says to Juilliard, 286 00:06:19,729 --> 00:06:21,480 "I'm your guy"? 287 00:06:21,480 --> 00:06:23,565 I look straight 288 00:06:21,480 --> 00:06:23,565 into the camera and say, 289 00:06:23,565 --> 00:06:26,694 "Moliere, Beckett, Delgado." 290 00:06:26,694 --> 00:06:28,487 Yes, it's bold 291 00:06:26,694 --> 00:06:28,487 to include my own name, 292 00:06:28,487 --> 00:06:30,698 but so is the sheer act 293 00:06:28,487 --> 00:06:30,698 of putting pen to paper. 294 00:06:30,698 --> 00:06:31,616 You're kidding, right? 295 00:06:31,616 --> 00:06:32,783 Why? What's wrong? 296 00:06:32,783 --> 00:06:35,410 It's smug and privileged 297 00:06:32,783 --> 00:06:35,410 and precious. 298 00:06:35,410 --> 00:06:36,912 No art school's 299 00:06:35,410 --> 00:06:36,912 gonna want that. 300 00:06:36,912 --> 00:06:38,497 Okay. How about this? 301 00:06:38,497 --> 00:06:40,290 We open on 302 00:06:38,497 --> 00:06:40,290 a blank sheet of paper. 303 00:06:40,290 --> 00:06:43,460 Under a Mozart fugue, 304 00:06:40,290 --> 00:06:43,460 we suddenly see a drop of blood. 305 00:06:43,460 --> 00:06:45,921 Is it the admissions committee 306 00:06:43,460 --> 00:06:45,921 slitting their wrists? 307 00:06:45,921 --> 00:06:47,840 Fine. 308 00:06:47,840 --> 00:06:49,174 The year is 18... 309 00:06:49,174 --> 00:06:51,510 No! You're on 310 00:06:49,174 --> 00:06:51,510 the wrong track here. 311 00:06:51,510 --> 00:06:53,679 They're gonna get 312 00:06:51,510 --> 00:06:53,679 a million applications 313 00:06:53,679 --> 00:06:54,930 from artsy little snots. 314 00:06:54,930 --> 00:06:56,348 You've got to stand out. 315 00:06:56,348 --> 00:06:59,143 When everybody else zigs, 316 00:06:56,348 --> 00:06:59,143 you've got to zoink. 317 00:06:59,143 --> 00:07:00,686 Isn't it "zag"? 318 00:07:00,686 --> 00:07:03,438 Exactly. 319 00:07:03,438 --> 00:07:04,690 Hi. We're back. 320 00:07:04,690 --> 00:07:07,067 I don't know what this is, 321 00:07:04,690 --> 00:07:07,067 but I love it. 322 00:07:07,067 --> 00:07:09,069 There's mud out front, 323 00:07:07,067 --> 00:07:09,069 so Dwight insisted. 324 00:07:09,069 --> 00:07:11,488 Apparently, they're not cool 325 00:07:09,069 --> 00:07:11,488 after you get them dirty. 326 00:07:11,488 --> 00:07:12,447 Oh! 327 00:07:12,447 --> 00:07:14,199 Last night, we also watch 328 00:07:12,447 --> 00:07:14,199 "An Officer and a Gentleman." 329 00:07:14,199 --> 00:07:15,660 Yeah, he lift me up 330 00:07:14,199 --> 00:07:15,660 where I belong. 331 00:07:15,660 --> 00:07:17,286 Okay. 332 00:07:15,660 --> 00:07:17,286 - Knock, knock! 333 00:07:17,286 --> 00:07:19,121 Yeah. 334 00:07:17,286 --> 00:07:19,121 Hi, Ms. Pasternack. 335 00:07:19,121 --> 00:07:20,372 I got to go 336 00:07:19,121 --> 00:07:20,372 meet some friends. 337 00:07:20,372 --> 00:07:21,999 - I'll see you guys later? 338 00:07:20,372 --> 00:07:21,999 - Okay. Be careful, Dwight. 339 00:07:21,999 --> 00:07:24,334 Here. I brought by 340 00:07:21,999 --> 00:07:24,334 some more liquor bottles 341 00:07:24,334 --> 00:07:25,711 for Lily's project. 342 00:07:25,711 --> 00:07:27,546 Wha... wh... 343 00:07:25,711 --> 00:07:27,546 what project? 344 00:07:27,546 --> 00:07:29,339 I don't know. 345 00:07:27,546 --> 00:07:29,339 I caught her going through 346 00:07:29,339 --> 00:07:31,508 my garbage, and she said 347 00:07:29,339 --> 00:07:31,508 she needed liquor bottles. 348 00:07:31,508 --> 00:07:32,802 Well, that's weird. 349 00:07:32,802 --> 00:07:35,137 Anyway, tell her I'll have 350 00:07:32,802 --> 00:07:35,137 a couple more for her tomorrow. 351 00:07:35,137 --> 00:07:36,889 Okay. Bye-bye. 352 00:07:35,137 --> 00:07:36,889 Take care. 353 00:07:36,889 --> 00:07:37,973 She can't 354 00:07:36,889 --> 00:07:37,973 baby sit anymore. 355 00:07:37,973 --> 00:07:39,183 What project? 356 00:07:39,183 --> 00:07:40,184 I don't know. 357 00:07:40,184 --> 00:07:41,310 We've got a problem here. 358 00:07:41,310 --> 00:07:43,604 Look what I found 359 00:07:41,310 --> 00:07:43,604 under Dwight's bed. 360 00:07:43,604 --> 00:07:45,064 Oh. 361 00:07:43,604 --> 00:07:45,064 Oh. 362 00:07:45,064 --> 00:07:46,273 Yeah, it's too bad. 363 00:07:46,273 --> 00:07:48,442 He brought such a great 364 00:07:46,273 --> 00:07:48,442 energy to the house. 365 00:07:48,442 --> 00:07:49,694 Mitchell. 366 00:07:49,694 --> 00:07:51,278 I just need a minute 367 00:07:49,694 --> 00:07:51,278 to process this. 368 00:07:54,949 --> 00:07:57,952 But the bottom line, Karen, 369 00:07:54,949 --> 00:07:57,952 is, your viewers should work 370 00:07:57,952 --> 00:07:59,536 with a realtor they can trust. 371 00:07:59,536 --> 00:08:02,539 Someone they can 372 00:07:59,536 --> 00:08:02,539 look in the eye. 373 00:08:04,208 --> 00:08:06,919 Boop! 374 00:08:06,919 --> 00:08:10,255 I'm confused. 375 00:08:06,919 --> 00:08:10,255 You wanted me to see that? 376 00:08:10,255 --> 00:08:12,758 Well, someone there said 377 00:08:10,255 --> 00:08:12,758 I was a real natural. 378 00:08:12,758 --> 00:08:13,884 I can't remember 379 00:08:12,758 --> 00:08:13,884 who it was. 380 00:08:13,884 --> 00:08:16,386 Oh, that's right ... 381 00:08:13,884 --> 00:08:16,386 Rainer Shine. 382 00:08:16,386 --> 00:08:17,972 The cheesy weatherman? 383 00:08:17,972 --> 00:08:20,725 No, the award-winning 384 00:08:17,972 --> 00:08:20,725 meteorologist. 385 00:08:20,725 --> 00:08:23,060 He's the recipient of 386 00:08:20,725 --> 00:08:23,060 back-to-back Golden Showers. 387 00:08:23,060 --> 00:08:24,561 That cannot be 388 00:08:23,060 --> 00:08:24,561 the actual name ... 389 00:08:24,561 --> 00:08:25,646 It's their Oscars. 390 00:08:24,561 --> 00:08:25,646 Oh. 391 00:08:25,646 --> 00:08:28,190 Anyway, I gave him 392 00:08:25,646 --> 00:08:28,190 my number. 393 00:08:28,190 --> 00:08:29,358 He called. 394 00:08:29,358 --> 00:08:30,693 We're grabbing 395 00:08:29,358 --> 00:08:30,693 drinks tonight. 396 00:08:30,693 --> 00:08:31,777 No big deal. 397 00:08:30,693 --> 00:08:31,777 I agree. 398 00:08:31,777 --> 00:08:33,654 Please. We both know 399 00:08:31,777 --> 00:08:33,654 it's a super big deal. 400 00:08:33,654 --> 00:08:35,656 I am happy that you have 401 00:08:33,654 --> 00:08:35,656 a new friend. 402 00:08:35,656 --> 00:08:36,907 Be good to have 403 00:08:35,656 --> 00:08:36,907 some guy time. 404 00:08:36,907 --> 00:08:37,742 Yeah. Well... 405 00:08:37,742 --> 00:08:40,535 My makeup. 406 00:08:40,535 --> 00:08:43,163 I have, like, three D's. 407 00:08:43,163 --> 00:08:44,456 Well, it's better than 408 00:08:43,163 --> 00:08:44,456 any report card 409 00:08:44,456 --> 00:08:45,290 you ever brought home. 410 00:08:45,290 --> 00:08:47,167 What are you guys doing? 411 00:08:47,167 --> 00:08:48,418 Skydiving. 412 00:08:48,418 --> 00:08:49,712 Ugh. I see where 413 00:08:48,418 --> 00:08:49,712 he gets it from. 414 00:08:49,712 --> 00:08:52,798 Wake me 415 00:08:49,712 --> 00:08:52,798 when it's my turn. 416 00:08:52,798 --> 00:08:55,009 I thought I could finally 417 00:08:52,798 --> 00:08:55,009 beat her because she's sick. 418 00:08:55,009 --> 00:08:57,136 I just want her 419 00:08:55,009 --> 00:08:57,136 to lose so bad. 420 00:08:57,136 --> 00:08:59,138 Yeah. So do I. 421 00:09:00,514 --> 00:09:01,849 Cheating? 422 00:09:01,849 --> 00:09:03,350 Are we really doing this? 423 00:09:03,350 --> 00:09:06,311 That smug sister of yours 424 00:09:03,350 --> 00:09:06,311 needs to be taken down a peg. 425 00:09:06,311 --> 00:09:08,272 Ooh! Peg. 426 00:09:08,272 --> 00:09:10,149 Think bigger. 427 00:09:10,149 --> 00:09:11,358 Pegs. 428 00:09:12,943 --> 00:09:15,613 Okay, Joe, 429 00:09:12,943 --> 00:09:15,613 repeat after me. 430 00:09:15,613 --> 00:09:19,241 Red rover, red rover, 431 00:09:15,613 --> 00:09:19,241 red rover. 432 00:09:19,241 --> 00:09:22,369 Wed wovah, wed wovah, 433 00:09:19,241 --> 00:09:22,369 wed wovah. 434 00:09:22,369 --> 00:09:24,079 Okay, now I want you 435 00:09:22,369 --> 00:09:24,079 to try it 436 00:09:24,079 --> 00:09:26,540 with a big smile 437 00:09:24,079 --> 00:09:26,540 on your face. 438 00:09:26,540 --> 00:09:29,960 Red rover, red rover, red rover. 439 00:09:29,960 --> 00:09:31,003 Oh. 440 00:09:31,003 --> 00:09:33,255 I am sorry. 441 00:09:31,003 --> 00:09:33,255 It's just sometimes I feel 442 00:09:33,255 --> 00:09:34,715 like my accent 443 00:09:33,255 --> 00:09:34,715 gets a little 444 00:09:34,715 --> 00:09:36,676 and it's gonna 445 00:09:36,676 --> 00:09:38,761 rub off on 446 00:09:36,676 --> 00:09:38,761 Fulgencio Joseph. 447 00:09:38,761 --> 00:09:40,763 Well, you shouldn't 448 00:09:38,761 --> 00:09:40,763 blame yourself, 449 00:09:40,763 --> 00:09:42,514 if that's what 450 00:09:40,763 --> 00:09:42,514 you just said. 451 00:09:42,514 --> 00:09:45,392 I actually have some 452 00:09:42,514 --> 00:09:45,392 exercises that can help you. 453 00:09:45,392 --> 00:09:48,437 Like 454 00:09:45,392 --> 00:09:48,437 Betty bought a bit of butter, 455 00:09:48,437 --> 00:09:50,439 but found the butter bitter. 456 00:09:50,439 --> 00:09:53,233 Betty bought a bit 'a bootie, 457 00:09:53,233 --> 00:09:55,653 but da bootie bittah. 458 00:09:55,653 --> 00:09:56,654 Uh... 459 00:10:00,365 --> 00:10:01,909 This is a pretty bad 460 00:10:00,365 --> 00:10:01,909 neighborhood, Jay. 461 00:10:01,909 --> 00:10:03,452 This is the story 462 00:10:01,909 --> 00:10:03,452 that we're telling ... 463 00:10:03,452 --> 00:10:04,912 scrappy young kid, 464 00:10:03,452 --> 00:10:04,912 born into poverty 465 00:10:04,912 --> 00:10:06,789 with the deck 466 00:10:04,912 --> 00:10:06,789 stacked against him. 467 00:10:06,789 --> 00:10:08,082 I have 468 00:10:06,789 --> 00:10:08,082 a calligraphy tutor. 469 00:10:08,082 --> 00:10:10,668 Hop out. 470 00:10:08,082 --> 00:10:10,668 I want to start shooting. 471 00:10:10,668 --> 00:10:11,836 Hey, you're staying 472 00:10:10,668 --> 00:10:11,836 in car? 473 00:10:11,836 --> 00:10:14,004 I'm gonna drive 474 00:10:11,836 --> 00:10:14,004 alongside and film you. 475 00:10:14,004 --> 00:10:16,048 Go ahead. 476 00:10:14,004 --> 00:10:16,048 It's perfectly safe. 477 00:10:18,968 --> 00:10:20,344 Hey. Did you just 478 00:10:18,968 --> 00:10:20,344 lock the door? 479 00:10:20,344 --> 00:10:21,637 The car does that 480 00:10:20,344 --> 00:10:21,637 automatically. 481 00:10:21,637 --> 00:10:23,180 Here. 482 00:10:21,637 --> 00:10:23,180 Try on this hair net. 483 00:10:23,180 --> 00:10:24,682 Isn't this a little 484 00:10:23,180 --> 00:10:24,682 over the top? 485 00:10:24,682 --> 00:10:26,391 Was "Stand and Deliver" 486 00:10:24,682 --> 00:10:26,391 over the top? 487 00:10:26,391 --> 00:10:27,559 Yes, it was. 488 00:10:27,559 --> 00:10:29,353 Fine, then act angry, 489 00:10:27,559 --> 00:10:29,353 like you're sick of 490 00:10:29,353 --> 00:10:30,980 taking orders 491 00:10:29,353 --> 00:10:30,980 from the white man. 492 00:10:30,980 --> 00:10:32,272 Yeah, that I can do. 493 00:10:32,272 --> 00:10:34,984 Walk along that wall, 494 00:10:32,272 --> 00:10:34,984 read from your script. 495 00:10:34,984 --> 00:10:35,901 Go. 496 00:10:35,901 --> 00:10:37,569 Hola! 497 00:10:37,569 --> 00:10:39,321 "Welcome to the streets 498 00:10:37,569 --> 00:10:39,321 I call home. 499 00:10:39,321 --> 00:10:41,531 It's tough out here, 500 00:10:39,321 --> 00:10:41,531 so I've had to be tougher. 501 00:10:41,531 --> 00:10:43,659 Because in a place where 502 00:10:41,531 --> 00:10:43,659 violence is currency 503 00:10:43,659 --> 00:10:44,910 and pain 504 00:10:43,659 --> 00:10:44,910 is your best friend..." 505 00:10:44,910 --> 00:10:47,037 Okay, this is embarrassing. 506 00:10:44,910 --> 00:10:47,037 Please don't shoot this. 507 00:10:47,037 --> 00:10:48,372 You're doing good! 508 00:10:48,372 --> 00:10:50,540 Hey, pretend like 509 00:10:48,372 --> 00:10:50,540 you're climbing over the wall, 510 00:10:50,540 --> 00:10:52,334 in case we want to say 511 00:10:50,540 --> 00:10:52,334 this is Mexico. 512 00:10:52,334 --> 00:10:53,418 Not gonna happen. 513 00:10:53,418 --> 00:10:54,712 Fine. 514 00:10:54,712 --> 00:10:55,963 Here's some spray-paint. 515 00:10:55,963 --> 00:10:58,465 Bubble letter me 516 00:10:55,963 --> 00:10:58,465 something about gringos. 517 00:11:01,761 --> 00:11:04,972 Oh, I wonder 518 00:11:01,761 --> 00:11:04,972 who that could be. 519 00:11:04,972 --> 00:11:06,181 Oh, Officer. 520 00:11:06,181 --> 00:11:07,892 Is there a problem? 521 00:11:07,892 --> 00:11:09,268 I'm here to arrest 522 00:11:07,892 --> 00:11:09,268 Dwight Bullock 523 00:11:09,268 --> 00:11:11,478 for underage drinking. 524 00:11:11,478 --> 00:11:14,273 We wanted to give Lily a chance 525 00:11:11,478 --> 00:11:14,273 to come clean on her own. 526 00:11:14,273 --> 00:11:16,066 Luckily, we have 527 00:11:14,273 --> 00:11:16,066 a friend of a friend 528 00:11:16,066 --> 00:11:17,610 who dresses as a cop 529 00:11:16,066 --> 00:11:17,610 for work. 530 00:11:17,610 --> 00:11:20,195 He also undresses 531 00:11:17,610 --> 00:11:20,195 as a cop for work. 532 00:11:20,195 --> 00:11:22,114 Remember, 533 00:11:20,195 --> 00:11:22,114 just act upset, okay? 534 00:11:22,114 --> 00:11:22,990 Okay. 535 00:11:22,990 --> 00:11:24,283 Dwight Bullock. 536 00:11:24,283 --> 00:11:25,534 I have to arrest you. 537 00:11:26,535 --> 00:11:27,870 You've been a bad boy. 538 00:11:28,871 --> 00:11:30,414 But I didn't do it! 539 00:11:30,414 --> 00:11:31,666 I'm innocent! 540 00:11:31,666 --> 00:11:33,876 I don't know how that bottle 541 00:11:31,666 --> 00:11:33,876 got under the bed! 542 00:11:33,876 --> 00:11:35,377 Now we're gonna 543 00:11:33,876 --> 00:11:35,377 take it down a notch. 544 00:11:35,377 --> 00:11:36,837 Hold out your wrists. 545 00:11:36,837 --> 00:11:38,714 I've got to take you 546 00:11:36,837 --> 00:11:38,714 downtown. 547 00:11:38,714 --> 00:11:40,925 Dwight, I am very 548 00:11:38,714 --> 00:11:40,925 disappointed in you. 549 00:11:40,925 --> 00:11:42,384 There's no more football. 550 00:11:42,384 --> 00:11:44,219 No more school. 551 00:11:44,219 --> 00:11:46,096 Lily, is there anything 552 00:11:44,219 --> 00:11:46,096 you'd like to say to Dwight 553 00:11:46,096 --> 00:11:48,683 before he's taken to jail. 554 00:11:48,683 --> 00:11:49,809 I guess. 555 00:11:49,809 --> 00:11:51,852 Martha Stewart said 556 00:11:49,809 --> 00:11:51,852 she used the prison time 557 00:11:51,852 --> 00:11:52,978 to work on herself. 558 00:11:52,978 --> 00:11:54,229 That is enough! 559 00:11:52,978 --> 00:11:54,229 W-w-we know 560 00:11:54,229 --> 00:11:55,815 you put the bottle 561 00:11:54,229 --> 00:11:55,815 under Dwight's bed. 562 00:11:55,815 --> 00:11:57,274 You owe him an apology 563 00:11:55,815 --> 00:11:57,274 this minute. 564 00:11:57,274 --> 00:11:58,525 It isn't fair! 565 00:11:58,525 --> 00:12:00,194 He eats everything, 566 00:11:58,525 --> 00:12:00,194 he's always in the bathroom, 567 00:12:00,194 --> 00:12:02,237 you're watching movies 568 00:12:00,194 --> 00:12:02,237 with him, shopping with him. 569 00:12:02,237 --> 00:12:04,198 And you two don't even 570 00:12:02,237 --> 00:12:04,198 love me anymore! 571 00:12:04,198 --> 00:12:05,324 - Lily! 572 00:12:04,198 --> 00:12:05,324 - That is not ... 573 00:12:05,324 --> 00:12:06,826 Lily, honey! 574 00:12:06,826 --> 00:12:08,202 Do you have 575 00:12:06,826 --> 00:12:08,202 the keys to these? 576 00:12:08,202 --> 00:12:11,038 I usually let the person who 577 00:12:08,202 --> 00:12:11,038 hired me find it in my pants. 578 00:12:11,038 --> 00:12:12,581 Well, if that 579 00:12:11,038 --> 00:12:12,581 is the custom, I ... 580 00:12:12,581 --> 00:12:14,249 Mitchell. 581 00:12:19,504 --> 00:12:20,589 Oh, my God. 582 00:12:19,504 --> 00:12:20,589 Again? 583 00:12:20,589 --> 00:12:22,591 Small bladder, big brain. 584 00:12:22,591 --> 00:12:24,134 That's why we're tied. 585 00:12:27,096 --> 00:12:29,223 I need a "T," 586 00:12:27,096 --> 00:12:29,223 an "L," and a "W." 587 00:12:29,223 --> 00:12:31,391 "T,"L"... 588 00:12:31,391 --> 00:12:33,435 Hopefully she's too sleepy 589 00:12:31,391 --> 00:12:33,435 to notice that she got 590 00:12:33,435 --> 00:12:34,645 three W's on her board. 591 00:12:34,645 --> 00:12:35,938 Also, can I take a pee? 592 00:12:34,645 --> 00:12:35,938 (P) 593 00:12:35,938 --> 00:12:37,982 Yeah. 594 00:12:35,938 --> 00:12:37,982 Coming right up. 595 00:12:41,736 --> 00:12:42,778 Hmm. 596 00:12:42,778 --> 00:12:43,904 Something wrong? 597 00:12:43,904 --> 00:12:45,572 I texted Rainer, 598 00:12:43,904 --> 00:12:45,572 like, three hours ago. 599 00:12:45,572 --> 00:12:46,657 He hasn't responded. 600 00:12:46,657 --> 00:12:48,242 I'm sure he's just 601 00:12:46,657 --> 00:12:48,242 playing hard to get. 602 00:12:48,242 --> 00:12:50,494 It's just weird. We had 603 00:12:48,242 --> 00:12:50,494 such a great time last night. 604 00:12:50,494 --> 00:12:51,912 I bet he's busy. 605 00:12:51,912 --> 00:12:53,748 He's a weatherman 606 00:12:51,912 --> 00:12:53,748 in southern California. 607 00:12:53,748 --> 00:12:54,874 He has to be ready in case 608 00:12:54,874 --> 00:12:56,541 temperatures plunge 609 00:12:54,874 --> 00:12:56,541 below 70 degrees. 610 00:12:56,541 --> 00:12:59,336 For your information, there is 611 00:12:56,541 --> 00:12:59,336 a wind advisory tonight. 612 00:12:59,336 --> 00:13:00,796 In fact, I'm gonna 613 00:12:59,336 --> 00:13:00,796 go take down my chimes. 614 00:13:00,796 --> 00:13:02,798 Whoa! 615 00:13:02,798 --> 00:13:04,258 Oh. 616 00:13:02,798 --> 00:13:04,258 Not him? 617 00:13:04,258 --> 00:13:05,550 No. I sold a house. 618 00:13:06,551 --> 00:13:08,303 He's probably 619 00:13:06,551 --> 00:13:08,303 just having dinner. 620 00:13:08,303 --> 00:13:09,596 He could be on a date. 621 00:13:09,596 --> 00:13:10,848 Apparently, 622 00:13:09,596 --> 00:13:10,848 he's quite the player. 623 00:13:10,848 --> 00:13:12,892 Makes sense. That could 624 00:13:10,848 --> 00:13:12,892 charm the pants off ... 625 00:13:12,892 --> 00:13:14,351 What the what? 626 00:13:14,351 --> 00:13:15,227 Hey, Dad. 627 00:13:15,227 --> 00:13:16,520 There he is! 628 00:13:22,777 --> 00:13:24,987 What is happening? 629 00:13:22,777 --> 00:13:24,987 Why are you kissing him? 630 00:13:24,987 --> 00:13:26,363 He dropped some 631 00:13:24,987 --> 00:13:26,363 serious cash at dinner, 632 00:13:26,363 --> 00:13:27,531 so I figured, 633 00:13:26,363 --> 00:13:27,531 what the hell? 634 00:13:27,531 --> 00:13:29,659 And you. 635 00:13:27,531 --> 00:13:29,659 How could you do this? 636 00:13:29,659 --> 00:13:31,243 Do what? Actually, 637 00:13:29,659 --> 00:13:31,243 I'm ... I'm taking it 638 00:13:31,243 --> 00:13:33,537 kind of slow because 639 00:13:31,243 --> 00:13:33,537 she's your daughter. 640 00:13:31,243 --> 00:13:33,537 Eh. 641 00:13:33,537 --> 00:13:35,330 Yeah, she is, 642 00:13:33,537 --> 00:13:35,330 and she's half your age. 643 00:13:35,330 --> 00:13:36,373 You're despicable. 644 00:13:36,373 --> 00:13:38,417 Oh, come on. Now, listen. 645 00:13:36,373 --> 00:13:38,417 Hi. Claire. 646 00:13:38,417 --> 00:13:40,460 Rainer, come in. 647 00:13:38,417 --> 00:13:40,460 We'll just talk this out. 648 00:13:40,460 --> 00:13:42,838 I would like that because 649 00:13:40,460 --> 00:13:42,838 I ... I don't quite understand ... 650 00:13:42,838 --> 00:13:44,256 What friendship means? 651 00:13:44,256 --> 00:13:46,383 Look, Phil, I ... 652 00:13:44,256 --> 00:13:46,383 I want to figure this out, 653 00:13:46,383 --> 00:13:48,177 but right now, I have to 654 00:13:46,383 --> 00:13:48,177 get to Chavez Ridge 655 00:13:48,177 --> 00:13:49,428 and cover this wind event. 656 00:13:48,177 --> 00:13:49,428 Mm. 657 00:13:49,428 --> 00:13:50,888 You know what? 658 00:13:50,888 --> 00:13:52,431 We're not friends. 659 00:13:52,431 --> 00:13:53,307 Go. 660 00:13:53,307 --> 00:13:54,516 Get... 661 00:13:54,516 --> 00:13:55,601 Phil? 662 00:13:55,601 --> 00:13:58,353 You're being 663 00:13:55,601 --> 00:13:58,353 ridiculous. 664 00:13:58,353 --> 00:14:00,815 You really want to leave 665 00:13:58,353 --> 00:14:00,815 things like that? 666 00:14:04,109 --> 00:14:08,072 From now on, we're getting 667 00:14:04,109 --> 00:14:08,072 our weather from Tricia Tazaki! 668 00:14:10,866 --> 00:14:14,954 Fred fed Ted bread. 669 00:14:14,954 --> 00:14:19,458 Ted fed Fred bread. 670 00:14:19,458 --> 00:14:21,335 What am I looking at? 671 00:14:21,335 --> 00:14:25,589 Joe's doctor gave me some 672 00:14:21,335 --> 00:14:25,589 sp-heech exer-cises 673 00:14:25,589 --> 00:14:28,843 to help me speak 674 00:14:25,589 --> 00:14:28,843 more clear-ely. 675 00:14:28,843 --> 00:14:32,262 The problem is I fee-ear 676 00:14:32,262 --> 00:14:35,933 I have forgotten 677 00:14:32,262 --> 00:14:35,933 how I used to talk. 678 00:14:35,933 --> 00:14:38,435 Well, if it's any consolation, 679 00:14:35,933 --> 00:14:38,435 this isn't any worse. 680 00:14:38,435 --> 00:14:39,812 Manny! 681 00:14:38,435 --> 00:14:39,812 Check this out. 682 00:14:39,812 --> 00:14:42,481 I think I took a stab at 683 00:14:39,812 --> 00:14:42,481 finishing your video essay. 684 00:14:43,983 --> 00:14:47,402 In a world divided 685 00:14:43,983 --> 00:14:47,402 into the haves and have-nots, 686 00:14:47,402 --> 00:14:49,154 a boy was born. 687 00:14:49,154 --> 00:14:51,657 It's tough out here, 688 00:14:49,154 --> 00:14:51,657 so I've had to be tougher. 689 00:14:51,657 --> 00:14:53,701 On the streets, 690 00:14:51,657 --> 00:14:53,701 you can't trust anyone. 691 00:14:53,701 --> 00:14:56,120 Even your closest compadre 692 00:14:53,701 --> 00:14:56,120 could turn on you. 693 00:14:56,120 --> 00:14:57,287 Please don't shoot! 694 00:14:59,164 --> 00:15:01,583 Every day was 695 00:14:59,164 --> 00:15:01,583 a battle for your s... 696 00:15:02,542 --> 00:15:04,253 I can't send this 697 00:15:02,542 --> 00:15:04,253 to Juilliard. 698 00:15:04,253 --> 00:15:05,087 It's all lies. 699 00:15:05,087 --> 00:15:06,839 That's right, Manny. 700 00:15:06,839 --> 00:15:09,884 Do not change who you are 701 00:15:06,839 --> 00:15:09,884 or you will lo-o-ose 702 00:15:09,884 --> 00:15:12,177 what makes you spe-cial. 703 00:15:12,177 --> 00:15:13,679 Am I still do-ing it? 704 00:15:13,679 --> 00:15:14,847 They're not all lies. 705 00:15:14,847 --> 00:15:16,390 I hear you the stories 706 00:15:14,847 --> 00:15:16,390 you two tell about 707 00:15:16,390 --> 00:15:17,600 the neighborhoods 708 00:15:16,390 --> 00:15:17,600 you lived in, 709 00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:19,644 growing up on 710 00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:19,644 the passenger seat of a cab. 711 00:15:19,644 --> 00:15:22,312 Sure, I put in what 712 00:15:19,644 --> 00:15:22,312 we professionals call "sizzle," 713 00:15:22,312 --> 00:15:24,148 but this is a part of 714 00:15:22,312 --> 00:15:24,148 who you are. 715 00:15:24,148 --> 00:15:26,150 And it's a lot easier 716 00:15:24,148 --> 00:15:26,150 to root for 717 00:15:26,150 --> 00:15:29,820 than a kid who insists that 718 00:15:26,150 --> 00:15:29,820 72% of his chocolate is cocoa. 719 00:15:31,280 --> 00:15:32,572 It's "cacao." 720 00:15:32,572 --> 00:15:35,409 I believe that 721 00:15:32,572 --> 00:15:35,409 that is his point. 722 00:15:38,037 --> 00:15:39,038 What was that? 723 00:15:39,038 --> 00:15:40,580 How about 724 00:15:39,038 --> 00:15:40,580 I ask the questions. 725 00:15:40,580 --> 00:15:42,416 When did you two set up 726 00:15:40,580 --> 00:15:42,416 this little rendezvous? 727 00:15:42,416 --> 00:15:43,709 While I was killing it 728 00:15:42,416 --> 00:15:43,709 on the air? 729 00:15:43,709 --> 00:15:44,710 He called me today. 730 00:15:44,710 --> 00:15:45,670 How'd he get your number? 731 00:15:45,670 --> 00:15:46,879 He said 732 00:15:45,670 --> 00:15:46,879 you gave it to him. 733 00:15:46,879 --> 00:15:48,130 That lying sack ... 734 00:15:48,130 --> 00:15:49,381 Uh-oh. 735 00:15:50,800 --> 00:15:53,719 Anyway, I dated 736 00:15:50,800 --> 00:15:53,719 my makeup girl for a while, 737 00:15:53,719 --> 00:15:55,680 but, uh, then 738 00:15:53,719 --> 00:15:55,680 she had to leave town. 739 00:15:55,680 --> 00:15:58,265 Oh. Wow. Well, if ... if 740 00:15:55,680 --> 00:15:58,265 it's not crossing a line, 741 00:15:58,265 --> 00:16:00,517 can I give you my daughter 742 00:15:58,265 --> 00:16:00,517 Haley's number? 743 00:16:00,517 --> 00:16:02,144 Really? 744 00:16:00,517 --> 00:16:02,144 Yeah, she's available, 745 00:16:02,144 --> 00:16:04,647 and she actually 746 00:16:02,144 --> 00:16:04,647 expressed some interest. 747 00:16:04,647 --> 00:16:06,231 Well, I'm definitely 748 00:16:04,647 --> 00:16:06,231 interested. 749 00:16:06,231 --> 00:16:08,525 Well, then 750 00:16:06,231 --> 00:16:08,525 let's make this happen. 751 00:16:08,525 --> 00:16:10,986 Phil Denphy, 752 00:16:08,525 --> 00:16:10,986 you are the best! 753 00:16:10,986 --> 00:16:12,487 No. 754 00:16:12,487 --> 00:16:14,573 I thought it was about 755 00:16:12,487 --> 00:16:14,573 a makeup job. 756 00:16:14,573 --> 00:16:15,616 I like him. 757 00:16:15,616 --> 00:16:16,909 He's a good guy. 758 00:16:16,909 --> 00:16:18,327 No, he's not. 759 00:16:18,327 --> 00:16:20,370 He's a great guy. 760 00:16:20,370 --> 00:16:21,997 Dad, run to him. 761 00:16:23,958 --> 00:16:25,542 Claire, I'm going out! 762 00:16:25,542 --> 00:16:26,836 Uh... 763 00:16:26,836 --> 00:16:28,503 Admit it, it's over. 764 00:16:28,503 --> 00:16:30,840 I'm ahead by 50 points, 765 00:16:28,503 --> 00:16:30,840 and you have two tiles left. 766 00:16:30,840 --> 00:16:31,882 There's got 767 00:16:30,840 --> 00:16:31,882 to be something! 768 00:16:31,882 --> 00:16:33,843 I ... ugh ... 769 00:16:31,882 --> 00:16:33,843 Why can't I see it? 770 00:16:33,843 --> 00:16:37,179 Six months ago, I was at 771 00:16:33,843 --> 00:16:37,179 Caltech, and now ... ugh ... work. 772 00:16:37,179 --> 00:16:38,430 Relax, honey. 773 00:16:38,430 --> 00:16:39,807 It's just a game. 774 00:16:39,807 --> 00:16:40,850 What if it's 775 00:16:39,807 --> 00:16:40,850 more than that? 776 00:16:40,850 --> 00:16:43,060 What if mono permanently 777 00:16:40,850 --> 00:16:43,060 changed my brain? 778 00:16:43,060 --> 00:16:44,937 I've always defined myself 779 00:16:43,060 --> 00:16:44,937 by my intelligence, 780 00:16:44,937 --> 00:16:48,065 and if that's gone, 781 00:16:44,937 --> 00:16:48,065 who am I? 782 00:16:51,652 --> 00:16:52,820 A loser. 783 00:16:52,820 --> 00:16:54,739 Luke! No! 784 00:16:54,739 --> 00:16:55,865 We cheated. 785 00:16:55,865 --> 00:16:57,407 Luke and I messed with 786 00:16:55,865 --> 00:16:57,407 the tiles. 787 00:16:57,407 --> 00:16:58,826 What? 788 00:16:57,407 --> 00:16:58,826 Yeah, it's just that, 789 00:16:58,826 --> 00:17:00,535 you're the smartest one 790 00:16:58,826 --> 00:17:00,535 in the family, 791 00:17:00,535 --> 00:17:01,621 and you always rub it in, 792 00:17:01,621 --> 00:17:03,163 and it doesn't 793 00:17:01,621 --> 00:17:03,163 make us feel good. 794 00:17:03,163 --> 00:17:04,498 Wow. 795 00:17:04,498 --> 00:17:06,041 I am so sorry. 796 00:17:06,041 --> 00:17:08,669 I feel terrible that I've been 797 00:17:06,041 --> 00:17:08,669 making you guys feel this way. 798 00:17:08,669 --> 00:17:11,421 Thank you for opening up 799 00:17:08,669 --> 00:17:11,421 to me about it. 800 00:17:11,421 --> 00:17:14,675 Otherwise, I never would have 801 00:17:11,421 --> 00:17:14,675 known that you cheated, 802 00:17:14,675 --> 00:17:16,093 which means that... 803 00:17:16,093 --> 00:17:19,596 I win, you lose! I win! 804 00:17:16,093 --> 00:17:19,596 You lose! I win! You lose! 805 00:17:19,596 --> 00:17:21,140 I win you lose. 806 00:17:21,140 --> 00:17:22,892 God, I'm so tired. 807 00:17:22,892 --> 00:17:25,853 If you want to shave off her 808 00:17:22,892 --> 00:17:25,853 eyebrows, I'm cool with that. 809 00:17:28,105 --> 00:17:31,901 Lily, honey, 810 00:17:28,105 --> 00:17:31,901 what're you doing? 811 00:17:31,901 --> 00:17:33,360 Okay. 812 00:17:31,901 --> 00:17:33,360 Her first ice out. 813 00:17:33,360 --> 00:17:34,236 Be strong. 814 00:17:34,236 --> 00:17:35,655 G... Lily. 815 00:17:35,655 --> 00:17:37,239 All right, 816 00:17:35,655 --> 00:17:37,239 all right, come on. 817 00:17:37,239 --> 00:17:39,533 What you did to Dwight 818 00:17:37,239 --> 00:17:39,533 was wrong, okay? 819 00:17:39,533 --> 00:17:41,410 We're very disappointed 820 00:17:39,533 --> 00:17:41,410 in you. 821 00:17:41,410 --> 00:17:43,495 Yes, and there's 822 00:17:41,410 --> 00:17:43,495 gonna be consequences. 823 00:17:43,495 --> 00:17:45,455 - Mm-hmm. 824 00:17:43,495 --> 00:17:45,455 - No electronics for a week. 825 00:17:45,455 --> 00:17:47,667 That'll be worse 826 00:17:45,455 --> 00:17:47,667 for you than for me. 827 00:17:47,667 --> 00:17:49,418 No dessert. 828 00:17:49,418 --> 00:17:50,920 Okay, that hurts. 829 00:17:50,920 --> 00:17:52,922 That being said, 830 00:17:50,920 --> 00:17:52,922 we could've handled things 831 00:17:52,922 --> 00:17:53,923 a little bit better. 832 00:17:53,923 --> 00:17:54,882 We should've talked to you 833 00:17:54,882 --> 00:17:56,508 before having 834 00:17:54,882 --> 00:17:56,508 Dwight move in. 835 00:17:56,508 --> 00:17:58,260 You mean I could have 836 00:17:56,508 --> 00:17:58,260 stopped it? 837 00:17:58,260 --> 00:18:00,680 Well, no, but at least 838 00:17:58,260 --> 00:18:00,680 we would've know how you felt, 839 00:18:00,680 --> 00:18:02,097 and we could've made things 840 00:18:00,680 --> 00:18:02,097 easier for you. 841 00:18:02,097 --> 00:18:05,350 Sweetie, look, I, of all people, 842 00:18:02,097 --> 00:18:05,350 know what it feels like 843 00:18:05,350 --> 00:18:07,227 to go from being 844 00:18:05,350 --> 00:18:07,227 the center of attention ... 845 00:18:07,227 --> 00:18:09,438 I went through it with 846 00:18:07,227 --> 00:18:09,438 my parents back on the farm, 847 00:18:09,438 --> 00:18:10,690 when they brought home 848 00:18:09,438 --> 00:18:10,690 a seven-pound 849 00:18:10,690 --> 00:18:11,982 little pink 850 00:18:10,690 --> 00:18:11,982 bundle of joy and said, 851 00:18:11,982 --> 00:18:13,192 "You're gonna 852 00:18:11,982 --> 00:18:13,192 share your room ..." 853 00:18:13,192 --> 00:18:15,069 We all know 854 00:18:13,192 --> 00:18:15,069 it's gonna be a pig. 855 00:18:15,069 --> 00:18:17,237 Anyway, he would snore... 856 00:18:17,237 --> 00:18:18,906 Okay, 857 00:18:17,237 --> 00:18:18,906 I'm sorry I lied. 858 00:18:18,906 --> 00:18:20,074 Thank you. 859 00:18:20,074 --> 00:18:21,826 You have to apologize 860 00:18:20,074 --> 00:18:21,826 to Dwight, too. 861 00:18:20,074 --> 00:18:21,826 Mm. 862 00:18:21,826 --> 00:18:23,828 I'll try to catch him 863 00:18:21,826 --> 00:18:23,828 in between bites. 864 00:18:23,828 --> 00:18:24,787 Oh! 865 00:18:24,787 --> 00:18:26,121 Hey, I have an idea. 866 00:18:26,121 --> 00:18:27,873 Let's think of something we can 867 00:18:26,121 --> 00:18:27,873 all do together, okay? 868 00:18:27,873 --> 00:18:29,333 Just the four of us. 869 00:18:29,333 --> 00:18:30,417 Anything you want. 870 00:18:30,417 --> 00:18:33,212 Absolutely anything. 871 00:18:33,212 --> 00:18:36,465 Three years ago, they gave me 872 00:18:33,212 --> 00:18:36,465 an "absolutely anything," 873 00:18:36,465 --> 00:18:38,508 and I wasted it on a Popsicle. 874 00:18:38,508 --> 00:18:41,178 That was not gonna happen again. 875 00:18:41,178 --> 00:18:43,263 Well, now, this is 876 00:18:41,178 --> 00:18:43,263 a lovely party. 877 00:18:43,263 --> 00:18:45,265 - Mm. 878 00:18:43,263 --> 00:18:45,265 - It's a splendid afternoon. 879 00:18:45,265 --> 00:18:46,308 More tea? 880 00:18:46,308 --> 00:18:47,852 No thanks. 881 00:18:46,308 --> 00:18:47,852 My cup is still full. 882 00:18:47,852 --> 00:18:49,019 No, it isn't. 883 00:18:49,019 --> 00:18:49,895 But I didn't 884 00:18:49,019 --> 00:18:49,895 drink it all. 885 00:18:49,895 --> 00:18:51,438 Just take the tea. 886 00:18:51,438 --> 00:18:53,190 Anyway, after 887 00:18:51,438 --> 00:18:53,190 the lightning strike, 888 00:18:53,190 --> 00:18:55,025 I had the perm for, 889 00:18:53,190 --> 00:18:55,025 like, two years. 890 00:18:55,025 --> 00:18:56,068 How's that? 891 00:18:56,068 --> 00:18:56,986 Rainer! 892 00:18:56,986 --> 00:18:58,237 Phil. 893 00:18:58,237 --> 00:18:59,780 What are you doing here? 894 00:18:59,780 --> 00:19:01,198 You're not one of those 895 00:18:59,780 --> 00:19:01,198 storm chasers, are you? 896 00:19:01,198 --> 00:19:03,784 Not since the movie "Twister" 897 00:19:01,198 --> 00:19:03,784 exposed how cutthroat it is. 898 00:19:03,784 --> 00:19:05,035 I came here to apologize. 899 00:19:05,035 --> 00:19:06,286 Oh, you don't 900 00:19:05,035 --> 00:19:06,286 have to do that. 901 00:19:06,286 --> 00:19:07,496 Yes, I do. 902 00:19:07,496 --> 00:19:09,289 I was confused, 903 00:19:07,496 --> 00:19:09,289 and I said a bunch of stuff 904 00:19:09,289 --> 00:19:10,290 that you didn't deserve. 905 00:19:10,290 --> 00:19:13,043 It did hit me, 906 00:19:10,290 --> 00:19:13,043 right around the mid-section. 907 00:19:13,043 --> 00:19:16,380 Listen, Haley's old enough 908 00:19:13,043 --> 00:19:16,380 to make her own decisions. 909 00:19:16,380 --> 00:19:20,217 I really like her, but if dating 910 00:19:16,380 --> 00:19:20,217 her is gonna be a problem... 911 00:19:20,217 --> 00:19:22,803 I don't love 912 00:19:20,217 --> 00:19:22,803 the 25-year age difference. 913 00:19:22,803 --> 00:19:24,930 It's actually 20... 2 ... 914 00:19:24,930 --> 00:19:26,098 22. 915 00:19:26,098 --> 00:19:28,017 Le... I would just 916 00:19:26,098 --> 00:19:28,017 hate to think 917 00:19:28,017 --> 00:19:30,352 that dating her meant 918 00:19:28,017 --> 00:19:30,352 that you and I 919 00:19:30,352 --> 00:19:33,355 still couldn't be, 920 00:19:30,352 --> 00:19:33,355 you know, friends. 921 00:19:33,355 --> 00:19:35,149 You still 922 00:19:33,355 --> 00:19:35,149 want to be friends? 923 00:19:35,149 --> 00:19:36,316 I do! 924 00:19:36,316 --> 00:19:38,152 Phil, I know 925 00:19:36,316 --> 00:19:38,152 a million people, 926 00:19:38,152 --> 00:19:40,780 but I really don't have 927 00:19:38,152 --> 00:19:40,780 a lot of real friends. 928 00:19:40,780 --> 00:19:41,822 Not even the sports guy? 929 00:19:41,822 --> 00:19:43,699 You guys are always 930 00:19:41,822 --> 00:19:43,699 laughing so crazy hard 931 00:19:43,699 --> 00:19:44,909 out of the commercials. 932 00:19:44,909 --> 00:19:46,827 Chip Fielder? 933 00:19:44,909 --> 00:19:46,827 No. That's all fake. 934 00:19:46,827 --> 00:19:49,454 Fake as Tricia Tazaki's 935 00:19:46,827 --> 00:19:49,454 shelter dogs! 936 00:19:49,454 --> 00:19:50,580 Careful, buddy. 937 00:19:50,580 --> 00:19:52,041 Look, maybe you should go. 938 00:19:52,041 --> 00:19:53,417 I'm not going anywhere! 939 00:19:53,417 --> 00:19:55,419 I'm going live in a second. 940 00:19:53,417 --> 00:19:55,419 You're in my shot. 941 00:19:55,419 --> 00:19:57,713 Oh. I get it. 942 00:19:55,419 --> 00:19:57,713 Call me. 943 00:19:57,713 --> 00:19:59,089 Call me! 944 00:20:01,341 --> 00:20:03,093 That's right, Steve, 945 00:20:01,341 --> 00:20:03,093 but you're gonna want 946 00:20:03,093 --> 00:20:04,637 to leave your kites 947 00:20:03,093 --> 00:20:04,637 at home tonight. 948 00:20:04,637 --> 00:20:08,015 My wind-erful forecast 949 00:20:04,637 --> 00:20:08,015 right after this. 950 00:20:15,397 --> 00:20:16,816 My name is Manny Delgado, 951 00:20:16,816 --> 00:20:18,483 and I'm two people. 952 00:20:18,483 --> 00:20:20,903 I'm the child 953 00:20:18,483 --> 00:20:20,903 of an immigrant single mother, 954 00:20:20,903 --> 00:20:23,781 who taught me to believe 955 00:20:20,903 --> 00:20:23,781 in myself and dream big. 956 00:20:23,781 --> 00:20:26,742 I'm also the step-son 957 00:20:23,781 --> 00:20:26,742 of a businessman 958 00:20:26,742 --> 00:20:28,619 who opened his home 959 00:20:26,742 --> 00:20:28,619 and his heart to me 960 00:20:28,619 --> 00:20:30,120 and showed me, by example, 961 00:20:30,120 --> 00:20:32,623 how to make 962 00:20:30,120 --> 00:20:32,623 those dreams come true. 963 00:20:32,623 --> 00:20:35,584 Whatever I am, 964 00:20:32,623 --> 00:20:35,584 whatever I have to give, 965 00:20:35,584 --> 00:20:38,629 is a product of these two 966 00:20:35,584 --> 00:20:38,629 very different worlds. 967 00:20:40,339 --> 00:20:43,550 It was so sweet 968 00:20:40,339 --> 00:20:43,550 that Jay cried a little bit. 969 00:20:43,550 --> 00:20:44,677 He's a good kid. 970 00:20:44,677 --> 00:20:46,428 And it's gonna be weird 971 00:20:44,677 --> 00:20:46,428 around here without him, 972 00:20:46,428 --> 00:20:49,473 but at least I'll always 973 00:20:46,428 --> 00:20:49,473 have my special girl. 974 00:20:49,473 --> 00:20:51,016 Mmm! 975 00:20:51,016 --> 00:20:53,936 And you'd never leave me, 976 00:20:51,016 --> 00:20:53,936 would you, baby? Mm! 977 00:20:57,522 --> 00:20:58,941 I just want you to know 978 00:20:58,941 --> 00:21:01,401 I'm really okay with you 979 00:20:58,941 --> 00:21:01,401 dating Rainer. 980 00:21:01,401 --> 00:21:02,444 Thanks, Dad. 981 00:21:02,444 --> 00:21:04,529 Yeah, he's got 982 00:21:02,444 --> 00:21:04,529 a really nice house ... 983 00:21:04,529 --> 00:21:06,115 Jacuzzi tub 984 00:21:04,529 --> 00:21:06,115 in his bathroom. 985 00:21:06,115 --> 00:21:07,241 Don't love 986 00:21:06,115 --> 00:21:07,241 that you know that. 987 00:21:07,241 --> 00:21:08,826 Look up. 988 00:21:08,826 --> 00:21:10,244 Hey, he mentioned 989 00:21:08,826 --> 00:21:10,244 this hair spray 990 00:21:10,244 --> 00:21:11,829 that's just oil 991 00:21:10,244 --> 00:21:11,829 and a little sea salt. 992 00:21:11,829 --> 00:21:13,538 Oh, that's more for 993 00:21:11,829 --> 00:21:13,538 conditioning that hold. 994 00:21:13,538 --> 00:21:14,915 Okay, wow, 995 00:21:13,538 --> 00:21:14,915 that was a close one. 996 00:21:14,915 --> 00:21:15,791 All right. 997 00:21:15,791 --> 00:21:17,835 Now, brush... 998 00:21:17,835 --> 00:21:18,961 blot... 999 00:21:20,462 --> 00:21:22,006 And beautiful. 1000 00:21:20,462 --> 00:21:22,006 Thanks, honey. 1001 00:21:22,006 --> 00:21:24,008 It's really great they're 1002 00:21:22,006 --> 00:21:24,008 having you back on the news. 1003 00:21:24,008 --> 00:21:25,635 No, no, I'm getting 1004 00:21:24,008 --> 00:21:25,635 a new driver's license photo. 1005 00:21:27,511 --> 00:21:31,306 Captions by VITAC :