1 00:00:01,630 --> 00:00:05,588 Okay, Joey, you take this club, 2 00:00:01,630 --> 00:00:05,588 and you hit that ball. 3 00:00:05,671 --> 00:00:07,671 Any questions? 4 00:00:05,671 --> 00:00:07,671 - Why does this say "Manny"? 5 00:00:07,755 --> 00:00:10,755 Don't worry about it. 6 00:00:07,755 --> 00:00:10,755 They were only used once. 7 00:00:10,838 --> 00:00:12,838 It was a swing and a miss 8 00:00:10,838 --> 00:00:12,838 for both of us. 9 00:00:12,921 --> 00:00:16,505 I needed to find a way to spend 10 00:00:12,921 --> 00:00:16,505 more quality time with Joe. 11 00:00:16,588 --> 00:00:18,630 I couldn't take another Saturday 12 00:00:16,588 --> 00:00:18,630 of hide-and-seek. 13 00:00:18,713 --> 00:00:20,171 At this point, 14 00:00:18,713 --> 00:00:20,171 I've spent more time 15 00:00:20,255 --> 00:00:21,796 in the closet than Mitchell. 16 00:00:22,921 --> 00:00:24,630 Golf is 17 00:00:22,921 --> 00:00:24,630 a very complicated sport. 18 00:00:24,713 --> 00:00:26,921 I don't want you to get 19 00:00:24,713 --> 00:00:26,921 frustrated if you don't ... 20 00:00:28,005 --> 00:00:29,588 Holy cow! 21 00:00:29,671 --> 00:00:31,088 Do you think 22 00:00:29,671 --> 00:00:31,088 you can do that again? 23 00:00:31,171 --> 00:00:32,005 Yeah. It's easy. 24 00:00:32,088 --> 00:00:33,796 Okay, Mr. Cocky. 25 00:00:33,880 --> 00:00:36,505 You know, there is a thing 26 00:00:33,880 --> 00:00:36,505 called beginner's ... 27 00:00:36,588 --> 00:00:38,255 What the hell? 28 00:00:38,338 --> 00:00:39,588 Hey, Brady. 29 00:00:39,671 --> 00:00:41,713 Hey, Jay, what's up? 30 00:00:39,671 --> 00:00:41,713 Oh, is this your grandson? 31 00:00:41,796 --> 00:00:43,255 I can't do this again. 32 00:00:41,796 --> 00:00:43,255 This is my son. 33 00:00:43,338 --> 00:00:46,713 Just take a look at his swing 34 00:00:43,338 --> 00:00:46,713 and tell me what you think. 35 00:00:47,921 --> 00:00:51,421 Wow. 36 00:00:47,921 --> 00:00:51,421 Your mom must be some athlete. 37 00:00:51,505 --> 00:00:53,338 Just so you know, 38 00:00:51,505 --> 00:00:53,338 I'm not a guy who's charmed 39 00:00:53,421 --> 00:00:55,463 when the help 40 00:00:53,421 --> 00:00:55,463 gets familiar. 41 00:01:10,380 --> 00:01:12,838 How's everybody 42 00:01:10,380 --> 00:01:12,838 this fine morning? 43 00:01:12,921 --> 00:01:15,005 Welp, I'm on my third day 44 00:01:12,921 --> 00:01:15,005 of my New Year's Resolution 45 00:01:15,088 --> 00:01:16,963 to not say things 46 00:01:15,088 --> 00:01:16,963 nobody cares about. 47 00:01:17,046 --> 00:01:17,963 Damn it. 48 00:01:18,046 --> 00:01:21,255 Oh, yay, 49 00:01:18,046 --> 00:01:21,255 Homeowners Association. 50 00:01:21,338 --> 00:01:23,463 I need their approval to put 51 00:01:21,338 --> 00:01:23,463 a She Shed in the backyard 52 00:01:23,546 --> 00:01:24,963 where the teeter-totter 53 00:01:23,546 --> 00:01:24,963 used to be. 54 00:01:25,046 --> 00:01:26,130 I don't understand. 55 00:01:26,213 --> 00:01:28,505 She said, 56 00:01:26,213 --> 00:01:28,505 "She Shed down by the seesaw." 57 00:01:28,588 --> 00:01:30,088 How are you not famous? 58 00:01:30,171 --> 00:01:32,213 Yes, bravo, 59 00:01:30,171 --> 00:01:32,213 but what's a She Shed? 60 00:01:32,296 --> 00:01:33,796 Well, it's just 61 00:01:32,296 --> 00:01:33,796 a simple little structure 62 00:01:33,880 --> 00:01:35,588 where I can go to be alone 63 00:01:35,671 --> 00:01:37,463 and do yoga or meditate 64 00:01:37,546 --> 00:01:39,338 and nobody can bother me. 65 00:01:39,421 --> 00:01:41,213 Oh, so a glass of wine 66 00:01:39,421 --> 00:01:41,213 and a cigarette in the tub 67 00:01:41,296 --> 00:01:42,421 isn't cutting it anymore? 68 00:01:42,505 --> 00:01:44,755 I don't smoke, honey. 69 00:01:42,505 --> 00:01:44,755 I have a tobacco-scented candle. 70 00:01:44,838 --> 00:01:46,505 They don't make 71 00:01:44,838 --> 00:01:46,505 tobacco-scented ... 72 00:01:46,588 --> 00:01:48,671 This is more of that stuff 73 00:01:46,588 --> 00:01:48,671 no one cares about. 74 00:01:48,755 --> 00:01:50,338 Congratulations, honey. 75 00:01:50,421 --> 00:01:52,338 Don't pretend 76 00:01:50,421 --> 00:01:52,338 you're happy for me. 77 00:01:52,421 --> 00:01:55,505 Luke and I wanted to use that 78 00:01:52,421 --> 00:01:55,505 space to put in a batting cage. 79 00:01:55,588 --> 00:01:56,921 Claire wanted her She Shed. 80 00:01:57,005 --> 00:02:00,755 We were in a stalemate, so we 81 00:01:57,005 --> 00:02:00,755 settled the dispute like adults. 82 00:02:06,546 --> 00:02:08,338 Come on, Dad. 83 00:02:06,546 --> 00:02:08,338 Batting cage. 84 00:02:08,421 --> 00:02:09,796 I really need to blink, 85 00:02:08,421 --> 00:02:09,796 buddy. 86 00:02:09,880 --> 00:02:11,630 You can blink 87 00:02:09,880 --> 00:02:11,630 when you're dead. 88 00:02:13,505 --> 00:02:15,880 - Ah, yes! Yes! 89 00:02:15,963 --> 00:02:19,421 All those Magic Eye posters 90 00:02:15,963 --> 00:02:19,421 paid off. Ah! 91 00:02:19,505 --> 00:02:22,005 I'm gonna get myself 92 00:02:19,505 --> 00:02:22,005 one of those fuzzy little rugs. 93 00:02:22,088 --> 00:02:24,380 They turned me down. 94 00:02:22,088 --> 00:02:24,380 What? 95 00:02:24,463 --> 00:02:26,505 Why on Earth 96 00:02:24,463 --> 00:02:26,505 would they do th... 97 00:02:26,588 --> 00:02:29,171 I ... I'm gonna find out how 98 00:02:26,588 --> 00:02:29,171 to get in touch with somebody 99 00:02:29,255 --> 00:02:30,671 from down at 100 00:02:29,255 --> 00:02:30,671 that Homeowners Association 101 00:02:30,755 --> 00:02:32,296 and find out 102 00:02:30,755 --> 00:02:32,296 what the hell is going on. 103 00:02:32,380 --> 00:02:33,463 Claire, 104 00:02:32,380 --> 00:02:33,463 I know you're upset, 105 00:02:33,546 --> 00:02:34,963 but I don't think 106 00:02:33,546 --> 00:02:34,963 you should do that. 107 00:02:35,046 --> 00:02:36,296 Well, look at that. 108 00:02:36,380 --> 00:02:37,921 They have a meeting 109 00:02:36,380 --> 00:02:37,921 this afternoon. 110 00:02:38,005 --> 00:02:39,463 I'll just go down there 111 00:02:38,005 --> 00:02:39,463 in person. 112 00:02:39,546 --> 00:02:43,046 Honey, I get a lot 113 00:02:39,546 --> 00:02:43,046 of my referrals from the HOA. 114 00:02:43,130 --> 00:02:44,630 We can't afford 115 00:02:43,130 --> 00:02:44,630 to alienate them. 116 00:02:44,713 --> 00:02:47,046 They are the ones 117 00:02:44,713 --> 00:02:47,046 who are alienating people. 118 00:02:47,130 --> 00:02:49,255 They all live 119 00:02:47,130 --> 00:02:49,255 on that stupid cul-de-sac. 120 00:02:49,338 --> 00:02:50,880 They only do things 121 00:02:49,338 --> 00:02:50,880 for each other. 122 00:02:50,963 --> 00:02:53,838 Probably swing if they weren't 123 00:02:50,963 --> 00:02:53,838 so aggressively unattractive. 124 00:02:53,921 --> 00:02:56,338 You know, I find the term 125 00:02:53,921 --> 00:02:56,338 "She Shed" offensive. 126 00:02:56,421 --> 00:02:59,255 Shouldn't ours just be called 127 00:02:56,421 --> 00:02:59,255 a shed and theirs a "He Shed"? 128 00:02:59,338 --> 00:03:01,213 Why do you bother 129 00:02:59,338 --> 00:03:01,213 making resolutions? 130 00:03:01,296 --> 00:03:03,046 This is so frustrating. 131 00:03:03,130 --> 00:03:04,421 If it's any comfort... 132 00:03:04,505 --> 00:03:06,838 you're not the only one 133 00:03:04,505 --> 00:03:06,838 to be stung by these people. 134 00:03:06,921 --> 00:03:08,546 Their ridiculous 135 00:03:06,921 --> 00:03:08,546 parking regulation 136 00:03:08,630 --> 00:03:09,630 made me give up my dream 137 00:03:09,713 --> 00:03:12,171 of owning 138 00:03:09,713 --> 00:03:12,171 the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile. 139 00:03:12,255 --> 00:03:15,380 Dah! Fine. 140 00:03:12,255 --> 00:03:15,380 I will move on. 141 00:03:15,463 --> 00:03:17,338 So does this mean 142 00:03:15,463 --> 00:03:17,338 we can get our batting cage? 143 00:03:17,421 --> 00:03:19,630 Luke, too soon. 144 00:03:22,880 --> 00:03:25,130 I'm really proud of you, Mom. 145 00:03:22,880 --> 00:03:25,130 Letting go shows real growth. 146 00:03:25,213 --> 00:03:27,088 I'm going to that 147 00:03:25,213 --> 00:03:27,088 Homeowners Association meeting, 148 00:03:27,171 --> 00:03:28,588 and I'm getting 149 00:03:27,171 --> 00:03:28,588 my She Shed. 150 00:03:28,671 --> 00:03:29,921 But you just told Dad ... 151 00:03:30,005 --> 00:03:31,005 I let him do magic. 152 00:03:31,088 --> 00:03:32,380 He lets me break promises. 153 00:03:32,463 --> 00:03:34,546 We both know what we married. 154 00:03:34,630 --> 00:03:37,588 You were at the course 155 00:03:34,630 --> 00:03:37,588 again? 156 00:03:37,671 --> 00:03:38,880 That's every morning 157 00:03:37,671 --> 00:03:38,880 this week. 158 00:03:38,963 --> 00:03:40,380 That's how you make 159 00:03:38,963 --> 00:03:40,380 a champion. 160 00:03:40,463 --> 00:03:41,463 You should see Joe play. 161 00:03:41,546 --> 00:03:43,880 It's like watching 162 00:03:41,546 --> 00:03:43,880 Merv Griffin interview. 163 00:03:43,963 --> 00:03:45,755 There's a certain finesse 164 00:03:43,963 --> 00:03:45,755 to it. 165 00:03:45,838 --> 00:03:47,588 Hey, hey, hey, hey. 166 00:03:45,838 --> 00:03:47,588 What are you training for? 167 00:03:47,671 --> 00:03:48,588 Nothing. 168 00:03:48,671 --> 00:03:50,755 Yeah, then go have 169 00:03:48,671 --> 00:03:50,755 a pudding cup. 170 00:03:50,838 --> 00:03:54,505 These high-performance protein 171 00:03:50,838 --> 00:03:54,505 bars are for elite athletes. 172 00:03:54,588 --> 00:03:55,838 Go ahead, Joey. 173 00:03:54,588 --> 00:03:55,838 Fuel up. 174 00:03:55,921 --> 00:03:57,796 You have a trophy 175 00:03:55,921 --> 00:03:57,796 to bring back today. 176 00:03:57,880 --> 00:03:58,921 What are you 177 00:03:57,880 --> 00:03:58,921 talking about? 178 00:03:59,005 --> 00:04:00,588 There's a kiddie tournament 179 00:03:59,005 --> 00:04:00,588 up at the club, 180 00:04:00,671 --> 00:04:02,130 and I signed Joe up 181 00:04:00,671 --> 00:04:02,130 for it. 182 00:04:02,213 --> 00:04:04,255 Jay, you're pushing him 183 00:04:02,213 --> 00:04:04,255 too hard. 184 00:04:04,338 --> 00:04:06,046 What are you talking about? 185 00:04:04,338 --> 00:04:06,046 Kid loves it. 186 00:04:06,130 --> 00:04:07,588 He'll tell you himself 187 00:04:07,671 --> 00:04:09,505 after he ices his shoulder. 188 00:04:09,588 --> 00:04:12,463 Ooh, that's the stuff. 189 00:04:12,546 --> 00:04:13,963 You know, Gloria, 190 00:04:12,546 --> 00:04:13,963 with the right training, 191 00:04:14,046 --> 00:04:15,130 this kid could go 192 00:04:14,046 --> 00:04:15,130 all the way. 193 00:04:15,213 --> 00:04:17,755 Me managing his golf career 194 00:04:15,213 --> 00:04:17,755 can be my second act. 195 00:04:17,838 --> 00:04:18,880 You're 70. 196 00:04:18,963 --> 00:04:21,171 Your second act 197 00:04:18,963 --> 00:04:21,171 was two acts ago. 198 00:04:21,255 --> 00:04:23,588 Stop living through him. 199 00:04:21,255 --> 00:04:23,588 It's too much pressure. 200 00:04:23,671 --> 00:04:25,505 Why are you making 201 00:04:23,671 --> 00:04:25,505 such a big deal about it? 202 00:04:25,588 --> 00:04:27,255 It's a ... 203 00:04:25,588 --> 00:04:27,255 It's a kiddie golf tournament. 204 00:04:27,338 --> 00:04:29,380 It's like a ... a playdate 205 00:04:27,338 --> 00:04:29,380 I don't hate being at. 206 00:04:29,463 --> 00:04:30,421 It's a bad idea. 207 00:04:30,505 --> 00:04:31,880 What if Joe 208 00:04:30,505 --> 00:04:31,880 wants to do something 209 00:04:31,963 --> 00:04:33,296 that is less competitive, 210 00:04:33,380 --> 00:04:36,296 like reading or papier-mâché? 211 00:04:36,380 --> 00:04:38,796 Let's not break out 212 00:04:36,380 --> 00:04:38,796 the Manny playbook just yet. 213 00:04:38,880 --> 00:04:40,505 Playbill would've been 214 00:04:38,880 --> 00:04:40,505 more cutting. 215 00:04:40,588 --> 00:04:41,505 Why am I helping you? 216 00:04:41,588 --> 00:04:43,005 I know you think 217 00:04:41,588 --> 00:04:43,005 you have the monopoly 218 00:04:43,088 --> 00:04:44,380 on deciding 219 00:04:43,088 --> 00:04:44,380 what's best for Joe, 220 00:04:44,463 --> 00:04:46,213 but I have 221 00:04:44,463 --> 00:04:46,213 parenting instincts, too. 222 00:04:46,296 --> 00:04:49,171 I deferred to Dede every single 223 00:04:46,296 --> 00:04:49,171 time on Mitch and Claire, 224 00:04:49,255 --> 00:04:51,880 and this time 225 00:04:49,255 --> 00:04:51,880 I'm going with my gut. 226 00:04:51,963 --> 00:04:54,463 Mitch and Claire turned out 227 00:04:51,963 --> 00:04:54,463 to be wonderful people. 228 00:04:54,546 --> 00:04:55,671 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 229 00:04:54,546 --> 00:04:55,671 I'm not knocking them. 230 00:04:55,755 --> 00:04:57,088 I love all my children 231 00:04:55,755 --> 00:04:57,088 equally. 232 00:04:57,171 --> 00:04:59,755 Bup, bup, bup, bup! 233 00:04:57,171 --> 00:04:59,755 That's winner water. 234 00:05:04,421 --> 00:05:06,713 Whoa, whoa. 235 00:05:04,421 --> 00:05:06,713 What's going on, Cam? 236 00:05:06,796 --> 00:05:07,796 I was gone 237 00:05:06,796 --> 00:05:07,796 for 45 minutes, 238 00:05:07,880 --> 00:05:09,463 and now our living room's 239 00:05:07,880 --> 00:05:09,463 a beauty salon? 240 00:05:09,546 --> 00:05:11,088 What, do you have a pit crew 241 00:05:09,546 --> 00:05:11,088 or something? 242 00:05:11,171 --> 00:05:13,713 Ooh, look at you using "pit 243 00:05:11,171 --> 00:05:13,713 crew" in a sentence like a boy. 244 00:05:13,796 --> 00:05:15,546 Is this all for Lily's party? 245 00:05:13,796 --> 00:05:15,546 You 246 00:05:15,630 --> 00:05:17,546 I thought we were just gonna do 247 00:05:15,630 --> 00:05:17,546 pizza and a movie. 248 00:05:17,630 --> 00:05:19,546 There are 12-year-old girls 249 00:05:17,630 --> 00:05:19,546 coming over here. 250 00:05:19,630 --> 00:05:22,213 Do you remember how 251 00:05:19,630 --> 00:05:22,213 mean and judgmental 252 00:05:19,630 --> 00:05:22,213 Haley was at that age? 253 00:05:22,296 --> 00:05:24,380 Yeah, I faked being sick 254 00:05:22,296 --> 00:05:24,380 that Thanksgiving. 255 00:05:24,463 --> 00:05:26,713 I was too scared to eat corn 256 00:05:24,463 --> 00:05:26,713 in front of her. 257 00:05:26,796 --> 00:05:28,005 Of course you were. 258 00:05:28,088 --> 00:05:30,046 The only word she said to me 259 00:05:28,088 --> 00:05:30,046 that entire year was "ew." 260 00:05:30,130 --> 00:05:32,505 Anyway, Lily wants to impress 261 00:05:30,130 --> 00:05:32,505 these older girls, 262 00:05:32,588 --> 00:05:36,296 so I set up a full-service salon 263 00:05:32,588 --> 00:05:36,296 to do makeovers. 264 00:05:36,380 --> 00:05:38,713 And you're qualified to do that 265 00:05:36,380 --> 00:05:38,713 because...? 266 00:05:38,796 --> 00:05:40,171 Okay, my uncle 267 00:05:38,796 --> 00:05:40,171 was in the business 268 00:05:40,255 --> 00:05:41,588 of mules appear younger 269 00:05:40,255 --> 00:05:41,588 for sale, 270 00:05:41,671 --> 00:05:44,671 so I think I know a thing or two 271 00:05:41,671 --> 00:05:44,671 about hair and make-up. 272 00:05:44,755 --> 00:05:46,213 Hi, hi. 273 00:05:46,296 --> 00:05:48,255 I brought y'all 274 00:05:46,296 --> 00:05:48,255 some stuff for Lily's party. 275 00:05:46,296 --> 00:05:48,255 Oh, my God. 276 00:05:48,338 --> 00:05:50,421 Thought you might not want 277 00:05:48,338 --> 00:05:50,421 to get into your own stash. 278 00:05:50,505 --> 00:05:52,338 I know how pricy 279 00:05:50,505 --> 00:05:52,338 your lady creams are. 280 00:05:52,421 --> 00:05:55,005 Okay, she's lashing out 281 00:05:52,421 --> 00:05:55,005 because I inherited Mama's skin. 282 00:05:55,088 --> 00:05:57,921 And I got Daddy's 283 00:05:55,088 --> 00:05:57,921 strong flickin' finger. 284 00:05:55,088 --> 00:05:57,921 Don't do it! Don't! 285 00:05:58,005 --> 00:05:59,755 Cam, you said that 286 00:05:58,005 --> 00:05:59,755 you were gonna keep this small. 287 00:05:59,838 --> 00:06:02,046 See, now I feel like 288 00:05:59,838 --> 00:06:02,046 you didn't tell me about this 289 00:06:02,130 --> 00:06:04,463 so that you could set it all up 290 00:06:02,130 --> 00:06:04,463 before I could say no. 291 00:06:04,546 --> 00:06:05,671 That is just not true. 292 00:06:05,755 --> 00:06:07,671 Not everyone is as calculating 293 00:06:05,755 --> 00:06:07,671 as you think. 294 00:06:07,755 --> 00:06:10,255 But, hey, I know where 295 00:06:07,755 --> 00:06:10,255 this is coming from, 296 00:06:10,338 --> 00:06:11,588 and it's not your fault. 297 00:06:11,671 --> 00:06:13,421 Seriously? 298 00:06:11,671 --> 00:06:13,421 This again? 299 00:06:13,505 --> 00:06:14,588 This sounds private. 300 00:06:14,671 --> 00:06:16,755 If you want me to leave, 301 00:06:14,671 --> 00:06:16,755 forget it. 302 00:06:16,838 --> 00:06:18,546 Okay, a-any time 303 00:06:16,838 --> 00:06:18,546 we have an argument, 304 00:06:18,630 --> 00:06:20,796 Cam blames it on 305 00:06:18,630 --> 00:06:20,796 how I was brought up. 306 00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:21,963 My therapist says 307 00:06:22,046 --> 00:06:24,588 that it's his way 308 00:06:22,046 --> 00:06:24,588 of deflecting responsibility. 309 00:06:24,671 --> 00:06:26,463 - You go to therapy? 310 00:06:24,671 --> 00:06:26,463 - Mm-hmm. 311 00:06:26,546 --> 00:06:28,546 You mean like one of those 312 00:06:26,546 --> 00:06:28,546 Woody Allen movies? 313 00:06:28,630 --> 00:06:30,130 Plenty of people 314 00:06:28,630 --> 00:06:30,130 go to therapy. 315 00:06:30,213 --> 00:06:31,255 Not farm folk. 316 00:06:31,338 --> 00:06:33,421 We solve our own problems, 317 00:06:31,338 --> 00:06:33,421 not that we had many. 318 00:06:33,505 --> 00:06:35,713 That's right, because 319 00:06:33,505 --> 00:06:35,713 you had a storybook childhood. 320 00:06:35,796 --> 00:06:37,755 I never said "storybook," 321 00:06:35,796 --> 00:06:37,755 although one time 322 00:06:37,838 --> 00:06:40,380 I did come home to a family 323 00:06:37,838 --> 00:06:40,380 of bears eating our porridge. 324 00:06:40,463 --> 00:06:42,338 - Don't make us sound like hicks. 325 00:06:42,421 --> 00:06:44,046 It was Tuna Helper. 326 00:06:44,130 --> 00:06:45,630 But we did have our share 327 00:06:44,130 --> 00:06:45,630 of problems. 328 00:06:45,713 --> 00:06:48,171 - Ah! 329 00:06:45,713 --> 00:06:48,171 - Problems? What problems? 330 00:06:48,255 --> 00:06:50,005 Uh, Mama and Daddy? 331 00:06:50,088 --> 00:06:52,505 It's not like they had 332 00:06:50,088 --> 00:06:52,505 the perfect marriage. 333 00:06:52,588 --> 00:06:53,713 Thank you. Thank you. 334 00:06:53,796 --> 00:06:55,505 I knew there was stuff. 335 00:06:53,796 --> 00:06:55,505 Everybody has stuff. 336 00:06:55,588 --> 00:06:56,796 No, there is no stuff. 337 00:06:56,880 --> 00:06:59,213 She's just making this up 338 00:06:56,880 --> 00:06:59,213 to get under my radiant skin. 339 00:06:59,296 --> 00:07:00,713 If you don't know 340 00:06:59,296 --> 00:07:00,713 what I'm talking about, 341 00:07:00,796 --> 00:07:02,880 I'm not gonna tell you right 342 00:07:00,796 --> 00:07:02,880 before you host a big ol' party. 343 00:07:02,963 --> 00:07:06,171 Oh, no, no. We've got time. 344 00:07:02,963 --> 00:07:06,171 Come on, come on. Let's hear it. 345 00:07:07,213 --> 00:07:09,380 You don't remember that 346 00:07:07,213 --> 00:07:09,380 time Daddy didn't live 347 00:07:07,213 --> 00:07:09,380 with us for a year 348 00:07:09,463 --> 00:07:11,255 'cause he was shacked up 349 00:07:09,463 --> 00:07:11,255 with that diner waitress 350 00:07:11,338 --> 00:07:13,213 Jannie Sue Butler? 351 00:07:11,338 --> 00:07:13,213 - Oh please. 352 00:07:13,296 --> 00:07:15,630 The only time Daddy ever left 353 00:07:13,296 --> 00:07:15,630 was to go to war. 354 00:07:15,713 --> 00:07:18,963 It was 1977. 355 00:07:15,713 --> 00:07:18,963 What war, Cam? 356 00:07:19,046 --> 00:07:20,671 The V... 357 00:07:19,046 --> 00:07:20,671 Hmm? 358 00:07:20,755 --> 00:07:23,796 He left us 'cause he turned 40, 359 00:07:20,755 --> 00:07:23,796 he got his first liver spot, 360 00:07:23,880 --> 00:07:27,088 and that bimbo reminded him 361 00:07:23,880 --> 00:07:27,088 of the Bionic Woman ... 362 00:07:27,171 --> 00:07:30,005 mostly on account 363 00:07:27,171 --> 00:07:30,005 of her fake arm. 364 00:07:31,130 --> 00:07:33,630 Oh, did you really 365 00:07:31,130 --> 00:07:33,630 not know this? 366 00:07:33,713 --> 00:07:34,755 What? 367 00:07:34,838 --> 00:07:36,838 I did not realize how big 368 00:07:34,838 --> 00:07:36,838 that was gonna be. 369 00:07:38,296 --> 00:07:40,088 Cam, hey. 370 00:07:38,296 --> 00:07:40,088 Y-You're okay, right? 371 00:07:40,171 --> 00:07:44,046 Cam, I-I-I can't face 372 00:07:40,171 --> 00:07:44,046 these 12-year-olds by myself. 373 00:07:44,130 --> 00:07:47,630 12-year-olds? 374 00:07:44,130 --> 00:07:47,630 I got to change my shirt. 375 00:07:47,713 --> 00:07:50,880 They're already angry. 376 00:07:50,963 --> 00:07:54,005 Um, okay. Uh... 377 00:07:54,088 --> 00:07:55,713 What are you guys doing? 378 00:07:55,796 --> 00:07:57,755 - Putting up our batting cage. 379 00:07:55,796 --> 00:07:57,755 - Oh, careful. 380 00:07:57,838 --> 00:07:59,130 It's really easy 381 00:07:57,838 --> 00:07:59,130 to get caught in the net. 382 00:07:59,213 --> 00:08:00,713 Well, 383 00:07:59,213 --> 00:08:00,713 you may want to take a beat. 384 00:08:00,796 --> 00:08:03,171 Mom went down to the HOA meeting 385 00:08:00,796 --> 00:08:03,171 to fight for her shed. 386 00:08:03,255 --> 00:08:06,171 Uh-oh. 387 00:08:03,255 --> 00:08:06,171 I only hope she keeps her cool 388 00:08:03,255 --> 00:08:06,171 and accepts their decision. 389 00:08:06,255 --> 00:08:09,755 Yeah, based on her long history 390 00:08:06,255 --> 00:08:09,755 of letting things go. 391 00:08:09,838 --> 00:08:11,296 Dad, we have a problem. 392 00:08:11,380 --> 00:08:13,463 Maybe not, buddy. 393 00:08:11,380 --> 00:08:13,463 The HOA never reverses itself. 394 00:08:13,546 --> 00:08:15,463 If they did, 395 00:08:13,546 --> 00:08:15,463 we'd be having this conversation 396 00:08:15,546 --> 00:08:17,213 in the front seat 397 00:08:15,546 --> 00:08:17,213 of a giant hot dog. 398 00:08:17,296 --> 00:08:19,213 I am the HOA. 399 00:08:17,296 --> 00:08:19,213 What? 400 00:08:19,296 --> 00:08:20,630 I intercepted 401 00:08:19,296 --> 00:08:20,630 Mom's application 402 00:08:20,713 --> 00:08:22,713 and forged a rejection letter 403 00:08:20,713 --> 00:08:22,713 from the board. 404 00:08:22,796 --> 00:08:24,671 Why? 405 00:08:22,796 --> 00:08:24,671 Because you told me to. 406 00:08:24,755 --> 00:08:26,838 When did I tell you 407 00:08:24,755 --> 00:08:26,838 to do that? 408 00:08:29,505 --> 00:08:31,463 Ah, yes! Yes! 409 00:08:31,546 --> 00:08:34,880 All those Magic Eye posters 410 00:08:31,546 --> 00:08:34,880 paid off! Ah! 411 00:08:34,963 --> 00:08:36,505 This sucks. 412 00:08:36,588 --> 00:08:37,671 Who knows? 413 00:08:37,755 --> 00:08:39,880 Maybe the HOA board 414 00:08:37,755 --> 00:08:39,880 will reject her application. 415 00:08:39,963 --> 00:08:42,171 Things have a way 416 00:08:39,963 --> 00:08:42,171 of working themselves out. 417 00:08:42,255 --> 00:08:44,796 Are you saying 418 00:08:42,255 --> 00:08:44,796 what I think you're saying? 419 00:08:44,880 --> 00:08:47,046 I think so. 420 00:08:47,130 --> 00:08:49,630 - You gave me the signal. 421 00:08:47,130 --> 00:08:49,630 - What signal? 422 00:08:49,713 --> 00:08:52,505 That wink when you want me to 423 00:08:49,713 --> 00:08:52,505 secretly take care of something. 424 00:08:52,588 --> 00:08:56,421 Of course I was winking. 425 00:08:52,588 --> 00:08:56,421 I was just in a staring contest. 426 00:08:56,505 --> 00:08:59,005 Wait. Did you say 427 00:08:56,505 --> 00:08:59,005 you've done this before? 428 00:08:59,088 --> 00:09:01,921 Do you think Alex's cello 429 00:08:59,088 --> 00:09:01,921 set itself on fire? 430 00:09:02,005 --> 00:09:03,213 Oh, my God. 431 00:09:03,296 --> 00:09:06,005 I got to get down to that 432 00:09:03,296 --> 00:09:06,005 meeting before your mother ... 433 00:09:07,255 --> 00:09:08,880 Untangle me quickly! 434 00:09:08,963 --> 00:09:10,296 Wait. 435 00:09:08,963 --> 00:09:10,296 Was that a wink? 436 00:09:10,380 --> 00:09:12,130 Do you not want me 437 00:09:10,380 --> 00:09:12,130 to untangle you? 438 00:09:12,213 --> 00:09:13,505 D-Do you want me 439 00:09:12,213 --> 00:09:13,505 to untangle you slowly? 440 00:09:13,588 --> 00:09:15,463 There's no signal! 441 00:09:18,588 --> 00:09:19,796 Refreshing cucumber water? 442 00:09:18,588 --> 00:09:19,796 No? 443 00:09:19,880 --> 00:09:22,130 Refreshing cucumber water? 444 00:09:19,880 --> 00:09:22,130 No? 445 00:09:22,213 --> 00:09:25,255 Are you thirs... 446 00:09:22,213 --> 00:09:25,255 - Hey, you're doing great. 447 00:09:25,338 --> 00:09:27,255 Just don't get nervous 448 00:09:25,338 --> 00:09:27,255 and turn all red. 449 00:09:27,338 --> 00:09:28,671 Do I do that? 450 00:09:27,338 --> 00:09:28,671 Am I doing that right now? 451 00:09:28,755 --> 00:09:29,796 Do people notice? 452 00:09:30,921 --> 00:09:32,046 Okay, you're not 12. 453 00:09:30,921 --> 00:09:32,046 It's okay. 454 00:09:32,130 --> 00:09:34,213 It got better. 455 00:09:32,130 --> 00:09:34,213 It got better. 456 00:09:34,296 --> 00:09:35,838 - Hey, Cam. H-How you feeling? 457 00:09:34,296 --> 00:09:35,838 - Hi. 458 00:09:35,921 --> 00:09:38,505 If you need some time to 459 00:09:35,921 --> 00:09:38,505 process that stuff about 460 00:09:35,921 --> 00:09:38,505 your dad, y-you sh... 461 00:09:38,588 --> 00:09:39,630 Oh, no. I'm fine. 462 00:09:39,713 --> 00:09:41,630 Unlike the chlorine 463 00:09:39,713 --> 00:09:41,630 in Melanie's hair 464 00:09:41,713 --> 00:09:43,505 that won't do 465 00:09:41,713 --> 00:09:43,505 any permanent damage. 466 00:09:43,588 --> 00:09:45,338 - Hey! 467 00:09:43,588 --> 00:09:45,338 - I'm working here, sweetie. 468 00:09:45,421 --> 00:09:49,130 Hi, girls. 469 00:09:45,421 --> 00:09:49,130 I'm Lily's cool Aunt Pam. 470 00:09:49,213 --> 00:09:51,088 I brought lighters 471 00:09:49,213 --> 00:09:51,088 for everyone. 472 00:09:51,171 --> 00:09:52,255 Please be nice. 473 00:09:52,338 --> 00:09:55,463 All right. We are done. 474 00:09:52,338 --> 00:09:55,463 What do you think? 475 00:09:55,546 --> 00:09:57,421 I wanted to look 476 00:09:55,546 --> 00:09:57,421 like Selena Gomez. 477 00:09:57,505 --> 00:09:59,838 Oh, well, I wanted a daddy that 478 00:09:57,505 --> 00:09:59,838 would respect his wedding vows, 479 00:09:59,921 --> 00:10:00,921 but we can't all get 480 00:09:59,921 --> 00:10:00,921 what we want. 481 00:10:01,005 --> 00:10:02,713 Dream smaller. 482 00:10:01,005 --> 00:10:02,713 There you go. 483 00:10:02,796 --> 00:10:05,755 Okay, okay. 484 00:10:02,796 --> 00:10:05,755 See, it's stuff like that 485 00:10:05,838 --> 00:10:07,296 that makes me think 486 00:10:05,838 --> 00:10:07,296 that you're not okay. 487 00:10:07,380 --> 00:10:09,421 Mitchell, it's just a joke. 488 00:10:07,380 --> 00:10:09,421 It's barbershop sass. 489 00:10:09,505 --> 00:10:11,046 They love it 490 00:10:09,505 --> 00:10:11,046 when I go there. 491 00:10:11,130 --> 00:10:14,005 All right, Violet, 492 00:10:11,130 --> 00:10:14,005 get your fancy can in the chair. 493 00:10:14,088 --> 00:10:15,463 You're up. 494 00:10:15,546 --> 00:10:19,255 Hi. 495 00:10:15,546 --> 00:10:19,255 So, what are we doing today? 496 00:10:19,338 --> 00:10:20,671 I was thinking 497 00:10:19,338 --> 00:10:20,671 of an updo. 498 00:10:20,755 --> 00:10:22,338 I like a high pony 499 00:10:20,755 --> 00:10:22,338 for you. 500 00:10:22,421 --> 00:10:24,005 There we go. 501 00:10:22,421 --> 00:10:24,005 - Ow. 502 00:10:24,088 --> 00:10:28,630 Oh, so, Vi, I've seen your mom 503 00:10:24,088 --> 00:10:28,630 at Parent Night. 504 00:10:28,713 --> 00:10:31,130 You know what? 505 00:10:28,713 --> 00:10:31,130 I've never seen your dad. 506 00:10:31,213 --> 00:10:32,255 He works late a lot. 507 00:10:32,338 --> 00:10:34,421 Well, I hope that's true, 508 00:10:32,338 --> 00:10:34,421 sweetie. 509 00:10:34,505 --> 00:10:35,463 Why wouldn't it be? 510 00:10:35,546 --> 00:10:37,296 I don't know. 511 00:10:35,546 --> 00:10:37,296 Sometimes father's lie. 512 00:10:37,380 --> 00:10:38,546 It's better for you 513 00:10:37,380 --> 00:10:38,546 to find out now 514 00:10:38,630 --> 00:10:39,796 than when you're 515 00:10:38,630 --> 00:10:39,796 a 40-year-old man. 516 00:10:39,880 --> 00:10:41,713 40? Okay, 517 00:10:39,880 --> 00:10:41,713 speaking of fathers lying. 518 00:10:41,796 --> 00:10:43,171 Can I talk to you 519 00:10:41,796 --> 00:10:43,171 for a second? 520 00:10:43,255 --> 00:10:45,505 Cam, move away, move away. 521 00:10:43,255 --> 00:10:45,505 - Hmm? 522 00:10:46,838 --> 00:10:49,671 Cam ... Cam, 523 00:10:46,838 --> 00:10:49,671 clearly you're not okay. 524 00:10:46,838 --> 00:10:49,671 Okay, you know what? 525 00:10:49,755 --> 00:10:51,963 I thought ... I thought I could 526 00:10:49,755 --> 00:10:51,963 tamp it down, put it in a room, 527 00:10:52,088 --> 00:10:54,213 seal it shut just like we did 528 00:10:52,088 --> 00:10:54,213 Grandpa when he got rabid. 529 00:10:54,296 --> 00:10:56,338 Okay, listen, I-I may have 530 00:10:54,296 --> 00:10:56,338 checked with my therapist 531 00:10:56,421 --> 00:10:58,380 on the off chance that you would 532 00:10:56,421 --> 00:10:58,380 want to talk to someone. 533 00:10:58,463 --> 00:10:59,713 No, sir. 534 00:10:59,796 --> 00:11:02,088 If I open that door, there's 535 00:10:59,796 --> 00:11:02,088 no telling what we'll find. 536 00:11:02,171 --> 00:11:04,338 You know what? 537 00:11:02,171 --> 00:11:04,338 I ... You know I cry inexplicably 538 00:11:04,421 --> 00:11:05,713 when I hear 539 00:11:04,421 --> 00:11:05,713 "Smooth Operator." 540 00:11:05,796 --> 00:11:07,546 I don't want to know 541 00:11:05,796 --> 00:11:07,546 what that's about. 542 00:11:07,630 --> 00:11:09,338 Hey, hey, just ... 543 00:11:07,630 --> 00:11:09,338 just give it a shot. 544 00:11:09,421 --> 00:11:11,130 Yeah, she's the best, 545 00:11:09,421 --> 00:11:11,130 and if ... 546 00:11:11,213 --> 00:11:13,088 if it makes you uncomfortable, 547 00:11:11,213 --> 00:11:13,088 we can leave, all right? 548 00:11:13,171 --> 00:11:15,338 She ... She has an opening 549 00:11:13,171 --> 00:11:15,338 this afternoon. 550 00:11:15,421 --> 00:11:16,588 What if the party's 551 00:11:15,421 --> 00:11:16,588 still going on? 552 00:11:16,671 --> 00:11:18,505 Your sister's here. 553 00:11:16,671 --> 00:11:18,505 They'll be fine. 554 00:11:18,588 --> 00:11:19,671 Okay, truth. 555 00:11:19,755 --> 00:11:21,838 How old were you 556 00:11:19,755 --> 00:11:21,838 when you first kissed a boy? 557 00:11:21,921 --> 00:11:24,005 Hmm... a boy person? 558 00:11:25,088 --> 00:11:26,421 I love that you're here, 559 00:11:26,505 --> 00:11:29,338 but don't you guys have 560 00:11:26,505 --> 00:11:29,338 a laundry room at the school? 561 00:11:29,421 --> 00:11:30,546 It's really humid 562 00:11:29,421 --> 00:11:30,546 down there, 563 00:11:30,630 --> 00:11:32,213 and my hair is 564 00:11:30,630 --> 00:11:32,213 challenging enough as it is. 565 00:11:32,296 --> 00:11:34,505 I thought you'd be going 566 00:11:32,296 --> 00:11:34,505 to Joe's tournament. 567 00:11:34,588 --> 00:11:35,963 No, he doesn't need me 568 00:11:34,588 --> 00:11:35,963 over there. 569 00:11:36,046 --> 00:11:38,046 I would be adding 570 00:11:36,046 --> 00:11:38,046 more pressure. 571 00:11:38,130 --> 00:11:39,380 Well, you always kept 572 00:11:38,130 --> 00:11:39,380 a low profile 573 00:11:39,463 --> 00:11:40,630 at my ribbon-dancing 574 00:11:39,463 --> 00:11:40,630 competitions. 575 00:11:40,713 --> 00:11:41,880 I couldn't even find you 576 00:11:40,713 --> 00:11:41,880 in the stands. 577 00:11:41,963 --> 00:11:46,921 Ah, yeah, with the ribbon 578 00:11:41,963 --> 00:11:46,921 and the swooshing. 579 00:11:47,005 --> 00:11:50,588 But Joe worries me because 580 00:11:47,005 --> 00:11:50,588 stress can destroy a child. 581 00:11:50,671 --> 00:11:54,463 Take it from Cartagena's junior 582 00:11:50,671 --> 00:11:54,463 regional backstroke champion. 583 00:11:54,546 --> 00:11:55,713 You used to swim? 584 00:11:55,796 --> 00:11:59,171 Like a cigarette boat 585 00:11:55,796 --> 00:11:59,171 fleeing to international waters. 586 00:11:59,255 --> 00:12:02,880 But all that stress 587 00:11:59,255 --> 00:12:02,880 brought the darkness in me. 588 00:12:02,963 --> 00:12:07,088 I started pulling out my hair, 589 00:12:02,963 --> 00:12:07,088 and... there was an incident. 590 00:12:07,171 --> 00:12:08,421 What kind of incident? 591 00:12:08,505 --> 00:12:09,671 I'm ashamed to admit it, 592 00:12:09,755 --> 00:12:11,796 but when I lost 593 00:12:09,755 --> 00:12:11,796 one of the big races, 594 00:12:11,880 --> 00:12:14,421 I might have hit 595 00:12:11,880 --> 00:12:14,421 one of the other swimmers 596 00:12:14,505 --> 00:12:16,296 in the leg 597 00:12:14,505 --> 00:12:16,296 with a skimmer pole. 598 00:12:16,380 --> 00:12:17,880 You Tonya Harding-ed 599 00:12:16,380 --> 00:12:17,880 another girl? 600 00:12:17,963 --> 00:12:20,796 No, in Colombia, they call it 601 00:12:17,963 --> 00:12:20,796 the Gloria Ramirez-ing. 602 00:12:22,171 --> 00:12:25,546 Mom, just because you freaked 603 00:12:22,171 --> 00:12:25,546 out doesn't mean Joe will. 604 00:12:25,630 --> 00:12:26,963 At the end of the day, 605 00:12:27,046 --> 00:12:29,046 he's only going to remember 606 00:12:27,046 --> 00:12:29,046 that you weren't there. 607 00:12:29,130 --> 00:12:30,130 I don't know. 608 00:12:30,213 --> 00:12:31,546 I think it would mean 609 00:12:30,213 --> 00:12:31,546 a lot to him. 610 00:12:31,630 --> 00:12:32,838 I know it meant 611 00:12:31,630 --> 00:12:32,838 a lot to me 612 00:12:32,921 --> 00:12:35,296 when you cheered on me and 613 00:12:32,921 --> 00:12:35,296 my ribbon-dancing partner, Josh. 614 00:12:35,380 --> 00:12:37,421 Uh, yeah, 615 00:12:35,380 --> 00:12:37,421 'cause you guys were so great. 616 00:12:37,505 --> 00:12:38,921 I danced alone. 617 00:12:42,546 --> 00:12:43,880 Next order of business, 618 00:12:43,963 --> 00:12:47,588 uh, Lisa would like to put in 619 00:12:43,963 --> 00:12:47,588 a little moat in her yard. 620 00:12:47,671 --> 00:12:49,005 Aww, 621 00:12:47,671 --> 00:12:49,005 and with a drawbridge 622 00:12:49,088 --> 00:12:50,880 from the sidewalk 623 00:12:49,088 --> 00:12:50,880 to the front door. 624 00:12:50,963 --> 00:12:52,963 I've always dreamed 625 00:12:50,963 --> 00:12:52,963 of being a princess. 626 00:12:53,046 --> 00:12:53,838 All in favor? 627 00:12:53,921 --> 00:12:56,296 Aye! 628 00:12:53,921 --> 00:12:56,296 Eyesore. 629 00:12:56,380 --> 00:12:57,755 Claire, 630 00:12:56,380 --> 00:12:57,755 did you say something? 631 00:12:57,838 --> 00:12:58,921 I'm sorry. 632 00:12:59,005 --> 00:13:00,796 You're just gonna 633 00:12:59,005 --> 00:13:00,796 rubber-stamp Princess Lisa here, 634 00:13:00,880 --> 00:13:03,838 and I can't have a She Shed 635 00:13:00,880 --> 00:13:03,838 in my backyard? 636 00:13:03,921 --> 00:13:05,171 Could you please 637 00:13:03,921 --> 00:13:05,171 wait your turn? 638 00:13:05,255 --> 00:13:06,838 W-We haven't moved on 639 00:13:05,255 --> 00:13:06,838 to new business yet. 640 00:13:06,921 --> 00:13:09,421 Fine. Motion to discuss 641 00:13:06,921 --> 00:13:09,421 new business? 642 00:13:09,505 --> 00:13:12,546 Seconded. Recognizing 643 00:13:09,505 --> 00:13:12,546 Claire Dunphy. Thank you. 644 00:13:12,630 --> 00:13:14,588 I'm not leaving here 645 00:13:12,630 --> 00:13:14,588 until I have my permit. 646 00:13:14,671 --> 00:13:15,880 What are you 647 00:13:14,671 --> 00:13:15,880 talking about? 648 00:13:15,963 --> 00:13:18,005 I submitted a request 649 00:13:15,963 --> 00:13:18,005 to build a simple structure 650 00:13:18,046 --> 00:13:20,130 you can't even see 651 00:13:18,046 --> 00:13:20,130 from the street. 652 00:13:20,213 --> 00:13:23,213 Speaking of which, 653 00:13:20,213 --> 00:13:23,213 why is nobody sounding the alarm 654 00:13:23,296 --> 00:13:26,130 over Gary's 655 00:13:23,296 --> 00:13:26,130 avant-garde mailbox? 656 00:13:26,213 --> 00:13:28,255 It's a penis, Gary. 657 00:13:26,213 --> 00:13:28,255 - Honey. 658 00:13:28,338 --> 00:13:29,963 What? What? Oh! 659 00:13:28,338 --> 00:13:29,963 What are you doing here? 660 00:13:30,046 --> 00:13:31,296 I was gonna ask you 661 00:13:30,046 --> 00:13:31,296 the same thing. 662 00:13:31,380 --> 00:13:32,963 I'm so sorry to interrupt. 663 00:13:31,380 --> 00:13:32,963 Keep up the great work. 664 00:13:33,046 --> 00:13:34,046 It couldn't have been easy 665 00:13:34,171 --> 00:13:35,671 keeping that sewer gator 666 00:13:34,171 --> 00:13:35,671 under wraps. 667 00:13:35,755 --> 00:13:37,630 What alligator? 668 00:13:37,713 --> 00:13:39,171 No, that. 669 00:13:39,255 --> 00:13:40,838 See that? 670 00:13:39,255 --> 00:13:40,838 That's not fair. 671 00:13:40,921 --> 00:13:43,421 Just because I'm not part of 672 00:13:40,921 --> 00:13:43,421 your little cul-de-sac cult ... 673 00:13:43,505 --> 00:13:45,546 your little cult-de-sac ... 674 00:13:43,505 --> 00:13:45,546 - Oh, that was a good one. 675 00:13:45,630 --> 00:13:47,546 I think you made your point. 676 00:13:45,630 --> 00:13:47,546 Why don't we get going? 677 00:13:47,630 --> 00:13:49,713 Claire, this is the first we're 678 00:13:47,630 --> 00:13:49,713 hearing about your She Shed. 679 00:13:49,796 --> 00:13:53,671 Oh. Then I've got something 680 00:13:49,796 --> 00:13:53,671 for you right here. 681 00:13:53,755 --> 00:13:54,963 She's got a gun! 682 00:13:55,046 --> 00:13:56,630 It's a letter, Lisa ... 683 00:13:56,713 --> 00:14:00,796 a rejection letter 684 00:13:56,713 --> 00:14:00,796 on HOA stationery. 685 00:14:00,880 --> 00:14:01,880 - Stationery? 686 00:14:00,880 --> 00:14:01,880 - Mm-hmm! 687 00:14:01,963 --> 00:14:03,005 In the interest 688 00:14:01,963 --> 00:14:03,005 of saving trees, 689 00:14:03,088 --> 00:14:05,380 we do all our correspondence 690 00:14:03,088 --> 00:14:05,380 via e-mail. 691 00:14:05,463 --> 00:14:07,046 Come on, Claire, 692 00:14:05,463 --> 00:14:07,046 we don't need to sit here 693 00:14:07,130 --> 00:14:08,921 and listen to these pillars 694 00:14:07,130 --> 00:14:08,921 of the community. 695 00:14:09,005 --> 00:14:10,171 Then who sent me 696 00:14:09,005 --> 00:14:10,171 this letter? 697 00:14:10,255 --> 00:14:12,963 Who knew 698 00:14:10,255 --> 00:14:12,963 I even wanted a She Shed? 699 00:14:13,046 --> 00:14:15,671 Who even... cared? 700 00:14:20,755 --> 00:14:22,421 Okay. 701 00:14:22,505 --> 00:14:24,380 It's a straight shot, pal. 702 00:14:24,463 --> 00:14:27,046 You got this. 703 00:14:24,463 --> 00:14:27,046 How are you feeling? 704 00:14:27,130 --> 00:14:28,171 I'm nervous. 705 00:14:28,255 --> 00:14:30,296 My son was being tested 706 00:14:28,255 --> 00:14:30,296 as an athlete, 707 00:14:30,380 --> 00:14:32,213 but I was being tested 708 00:14:30,380 --> 00:14:32,213 as a father. 709 00:14:32,296 --> 00:14:36,671 What I said then would help 710 00:14:32,296 --> 00:14:36,671 shape the man Joe would become. 711 00:14:36,755 --> 00:14:38,255 Nerves are for losers. 712 00:14:38,338 --> 00:14:40,171 What you're feeling 713 00:14:38,338 --> 00:14:40,171 is excitement, 714 00:14:40,255 --> 00:14:41,796 because for the first time 715 00:14:40,255 --> 00:14:41,796 in your life, 716 00:14:41,880 --> 00:14:43,796 you're doing something 717 00:14:41,880 --> 00:14:43,796 that actually matters. 718 00:14:43,880 --> 00:14:45,713 These other kids ... 719 00:14:43,880 --> 00:14:45,713 they want you to choke 720 00:14:45,796 --> 00:14:47,463 because you're king 721 00:14:45,796 --> 00:14:47,463 of the mountain, 722 00:14:47,546 --> 00:14:49,046 and they're climbing 723 00:14:47,546 --> 00:14:49,046 to reach you. 724 00:14:49,130 --> 00:14:51,671 You've got to be ready 725 00:14:49,130 --> 00:14:51,671 to step on their fingers. 726 00:14:51,755 --> 00:14:52,880 That sounds mean. 727 00:14:52,963 --> 00:14:54,171 They would do 728 00:14:52,963 --> 00:14:54,171 the same thing to you. 729 00:14:54,255 --> 00:14:56,838 Now, get out there 730 00:14:54,255 --> 00:14:56,838 and take what is ours. 731 00:14:56,921 --> 00:14:58,130 And have fun. 732 00:15:08,963 --> 00:15:11,255 Huh. 733 00:15:08,963 --> 00:15:11,255 That's new. 734 00:15:13,380 --> 00:15:15,796 She's right behind me. 735 00:15:13,380 --> 00:15:15,796 She knows about the letter. 736 00:15:15,880 --> 00:15:17,671 What are we gonna do? 737 00:15:15,880 --> 00:15:17,671 We have to think of an excuse. 738 00:15:17,755 --> 00:15:18,838 We don't have time! 739 00:15:21,046 --> 00:15:23,588 Huh. 740 00:15:21,046 --> 00:15:23,588 Guess she hit a light. 741 00:15:23,671 --> 00:15:25,296 All right. Well, 742 00:15:23,671 --> 00:15:25,296 let's think this through. 743 00:15:25,380 --> 00:15:26,338 Oh. 744 00:15:26,421 --> 00:15:29,213 Really, Phil? 745 00:15:26,421 --> 00:15:29,213 You just turned and ran? 746 00:15:29,296 --> 00:15:30,546 Sweetheart, I... 747 00:15:31,338 --> 00:15:32,171 I ... 748 00:15:32,255 --> 00:15:33,255 Don't you run again. 749 00:15:33,338 --> 00:15:34,546 Okay. 750 00:15:34,630 --> 00:15:36,880 I have one question. 751 00:15:34,630 --> 00:15:36,880 Why? 752 00:15:36,963 --> 00:15:38,171 It's complicated. 753 00:15:38,255 --> 00:15:39,630 How is it complicated? 754 00:15:39,713 --> 00:15:41,838 You printed fake stationery 755 00:15:39,713 --> 00:15:41,838 and forged a letter 756 00:15:41,921 --> 00:15:43,880 so you could have 757 00:15:41,921 --> 00:15:43,880 a stupid batting cage. 758 00:15:43,963 --> 00:15:45,546 - It's not his fault. 759 00:15:43,963 --> 00:15:45,546 - Luke ... 760 00:15:45,630 --> 00:15:47,838 - I'm gonna tell her. 761 00:15:47,921 --> 00:15:49,338 - He got scared. 762 00:15:47,921 --> 00:15:49,338 - What? 763 00:15:49,421 --> 00:15:51,463 He thought you would like 764 00:15:49,421 --> 00:15:51,463 being out there alone 765 00:15:49,421 --> 00:15:51,463 in your shed so much 766 00:15:51,546 --> 00:15:53,338 you'd stop wanting 767 00:15:51,546 --> 00:15:53,338 to spend time with him. 768 00:15:53,421 --> 00:15:54,630 Come on. 769 00:15:54,713 --> 00:15:56,921 He was worried maybe you'd start 770 00:15:54,713 --> 00:15:56,921 sleeping out there. 771 00:15:57,005 --> 00:15:59,671 Pretty soon it's where you 772 00:15:57,005 --> 00:15:59,671 and your friends go to drink 773 00:15:59,755 --> 00:16:01,338 and complain 774 00:15:59,755 --> 00:16:01,338 about your husbands. 775 00:16:01,421 --> 00:16:02,838 Oh, I don't need a shed 776 00:16:01,421 --> 00:16:02,838 for that. 777 00:16:02,921 --> 00:16:04,505 We ... We do it on a group text. 778 00:16:02,921 --> 00:16:04,505 - Huh? 779 00:16:04,588 --> 00:16:06,296 Honey, I didn't know 780 00:16:04,588 --> 00:16:06,296 that's how you felt. 781 00:16:06,380 --> 00:16:08,130 Why didn't you 782 00:16:06,380 --> 00:16:08,130 say something? 783 00:16:08,213 --> 00:16:10,713 I guess I'm not comfortable 784 00:16:08,213 --> 00:16:10,713 being vulnerable... 785 00:16:08,213 --> 00:16:10,713 Oh. 786 00:16:10,796 --> 00:16:12,963 except ... 787 00:16:10,796 --> 00:16:12,963 except with Luke. 788 00:16:13,755 --> 00:16:15,588 The whole reason 789 00:16:13,755 --> 00:16:15,588 I wanted to get that shed 790 00:16:15,671 --> 00:16:18,046 was to give myself 791 00:16:15,671 --> 00:16:18,046 a place to calm down 792 00:16:18,130 --> 00:16:20,296 and spare you 793 00:16:18,130 --> 00:16:20,296 some of my insanity. 794 00:16:20,963 --> 00:16:23,880 If anything, I ... I thought 795 00:16:20,963 --> 00:16:23,880 it would help our relationship. 796 00:16:23,963 --> 00:16:25,588 Sweetheart. 797 00:16:25,671 --> 00:16:26,588 He accepts your apology. 798 00:16:26,671 --> 00:16:29,838 I got it from here, buddy. 799 00:16:26,671 --> 00:16:29,838 Mm. 800 00:16:29,921 --> 00:16:33,546 We got our batting cage... 801 00:16:29,921 --> 00:16:33,546 sort of. 802 00:16:33,630 --> 00:16:34,880 Ugh! 803 00:16:34,963 --> 00:16:37,463 Hey, Mom, think we can get 804 00:16:34,963 --> 00:16:37,463 in there any time soon? 805 00:16:37,546 --> 00:16:40,046 Not after 806 00:16:37,546 --> 00:16:40,046 the day I've had! 807 00:16:40,130 --> 00:16:42,963 Come on, buddy. 808 00:16:40,130 --> 00:16:42,963 Let's try again tomorrow. 809 00:16:43,963 --> 00:16:45,171 Come on. 810 00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:47,255 Yeah! 811 00:16:47,338 --> 00:16:49,255 Here you go. 812 00:16:50,296 --> 00:16:52,671 What is this? 813 00:16:50,296 --> 00:16:52,671 I need a putter! 814 00:16:52,755 --> 00:16:55,088 Take it easy. 815 00:16:52,755 --> 00:16:55,088 You're only down by one stroke. 816 00:16:55,171 --> 00:16:56,796 Don't remind me! 817 00:16:56,880 --> 00:16:59,838 He's fine, everybody. 818 00:16:56,880 --> 00:16:59,838 He's fine. 819 00:16:59,921 --> 00:17:01,296 Good luck, Joe. 820 00:17:01,380 --> 00:17:03,463 Gloria? I-I guess you're 821 00:17:01,380 --> 00:17:03,463 here to pull Joey out 822 00:17:01,380 --> 00:17:03,463 of the tournament. 823 00:17:03,546 --> 00:17:04,713 No, no. 824 00:17:03,546 --> 00:17:04,713 I came to cheer him on. 825 00:17:04,796 --> 00:17:06,130 No, but I thought about 826 00:17:04,796 --> 00:17:06,130 what you were saying, 827 00:17:06,213 --> 00:17:07,380 and even though 828 00:17:06,213 --> 00:17:07,380 you weren't right, 829 00:17:07,463 --> 00:17:08,630 I'm gonna let you 830 00:17:07,463 --> 00:17:08,630 have this one. 831 00:17:08,713 --> 00:17:10,630 You can do this, baby. 832 00:17:10,713 --> 00:17:12,505 I'm trying 833 00:17:10,713 --> 00:17:12,505 to concentrate! 834 00:17:12,588 --> 00:17:13,796 What is that all about? 835 00:17:13,880 --> 00:17:16,505 I don't know, Gloria. 836 00:17:13,880 --> 00:17:16,505 You seem to make him tense. 837 00:17:19,838 --> 00:17:22,755 Uh, and there's 838 00:17:19,838 --> 00:17:22,755 this other thing. 839 00:17:19,838 --> 00:17:22,755 I knew it! 840 00:17:22,838 --> 00:17:24,088 You were in my eyeline! 841 00:17:24,171 --> 00:17:26,213 On your fingers! 842 00:17:24,171 --> 00:17:26,213 - No. Wait. Joe, come here! 843 00:17:26,296 --> 00:17:28,671 I'm going to step 844 00:17:26,296 --> 00:17:28,671 on your fingers! 845 00:17:26,296 --> 00:17:28,671 Joe, come back here! 846 00:17:28,755 --> 00:17:30,963 - I'm the king of the mountain! 847 00:17:28,755 --> 00:17:30,963 - Give me the club! 848 00:17:31,046 --> 00:17:31,838 Give me the club. 849 00:17:31,921 --> 00:17:33,630 Give me the club! 850 00:17:33,713 --> 00:17:35,380 Why? 851 00:17:35,463 --> 00:17:37,255 Not again. 852 00:17:37,338 --> 00:17:39,463 You're gonna love hockey. 853 00:17:40,380 --> 00:17:41,588 - Okay. 854 00:17:40,380 --> 00:17:41,588 You know what? 855 00:17:41,671 --> 00:17:44,046 If people back home knew 856 00:17:41,671 --> 00:17:44,046 I was in a therapist's office, 857 00:17:44,171 --> 00:17:47,088 it would be all over the 858 00:17:44,171 --> 00:17:47,088 "Rumors and Ramblins" section 859 00:17:47,171 --> 00:17:48,796 of the Grasshopper Gazette. 860 00:17:48,880 --> 00:17:51,088 "Liberal Left Coast 861 00:17:48,880 --> 00:17:51,088 Breaks Local Hero." 862 00:17:51,171 --> 00:17:52,463 What are you typing? 863 00:17:52,546 --> 00:17:53,671 Exactly what 864 00:17:52,546 --> 00:17:53,671 you just said, 865 00:17:53,755 --> 00:17:55,005 but don't worry, 866 00:17:53,755 --> 00:17:55,005 it's for my therapy, not yours. 867 00:17:55,088 --> 00:17:56,963 You know what? 868 00:17:55,088 --> 00:17:56,963 This is your therapy, 869 00:17:57,046 --> 00:17:58,588 and I don't want 870 00:17:57,046 --> 00:17:58,588 to be here. 871 00:17:58,671 --> 00:18:00,130 Cam, come on. 872 00:17:58,671 --> 00:18:00,130 You need this. 873 00:18:00,213 --> 00:18:01,963 Just give it a shot. 874 00:18:00,213 --> 00:18:01,963 Come on! 875 00:18:02,046 --> 00:18:04,255 - Hello, Mitchell. 876 00:18:04,338 --> 00:18:05,463 Hi, Dr. Green. 877 00:18:05,546 --> 00:18:07,921 Thank you so much 878 00:18:05,546 --> 00:18:07,921 for making the time to see us. 879 00:18:08,005 --> 00:18:09,588 - Okay, what's that voice? 880 00:18:08,005 --> 00:18:09,588 - Hmm? 881 00:18:09,671 --> 00:18:12,171 Are you tamping down your crazy 882 00:18:09,671 --> 00:18:12,171 to impress your therapist... 883 00:18:09,671 --> 00:18:12,171 No. No. 884 00:18:12,255 --> 00:18:14,838 like you do when you clean up 885 00:18:12,255 --> 00:18:14,838 before the housekeeper comes? 886 00:18:14,921 --> 00:18:17,296 I appreciate what you're saying, 887 00:18:17,380 --> 00:18:20,880 I hear you, and I'm gonna 888 00:18:17,380 --> 00:18:20,880 give it some thought. 889 00:18:20,963 --> 00:18:23,213 The hell? 890 00:18:20,963 --> 00:18:23,213 Can we move into this place? 891 00:18:23,296 --> 00:18:24,421 - You must be Cameron. 892 00:18:23,296 --> 00:18:24,421 - Yes. 893 00:18:24,505 --> 00:18:26,630 So nice to meet you. 894 00:18:24,505 --> 00:18:26,630 I've heard so much about you ... 895 00:18:26,713 --> 00:18:28,463 Da-ba-mnh-mnh. 896 00:18:26,713 --> 00:18:28,463 Unh-unh. 897 00:18:28,546 --> 00:18:31,505 Mitchell, how do you 898 00:18:28,546 --> 00:18:31,505 feel about how you're 899 00:18:28,546 --> 00:18:31,505 behaving right now? 900 00:18:31,588 --> 00:18:33,630 I don't love it. 901 00:18:31,588 --> 00:18:33,630 Can I ... Can I restart? 902 00:18:33,713 --> 00:18:35,338 - Mm-hmm. 903 00:18:33,713 --> 00:18:35,338 - Okay. 904 00:18:35,421 --> 00:18:36,755 A-All right. 905 00:18:35,421 --> 00:18:36,755 Um, you know what? 906 00:18:36,838 --> 00:18:38,421 This ... This ... 907 00:18:36,838 --> 00:18:38,421 I don't want to be here. 908 00:18:38,505 --> 00:18:40,005 This just isn't me. 909 00:18:40,088 --> 00:18:41,755 The art on the wall 910 00:18:40,088 --> 00:18:41,755 is weird. 911 00:18:41,838 --> 00:18:44,546 The candy bowl 912 00:18:41,838 --> 00:18:44,546 feels like a test, uh... 913 00:18:44,630 --> 00:18:47,046 You know what? 914 00:18:44,630 --> 00:18:47,046 I'm gonna have, uh, just one. 915 00:18:47,130 --> 00:18:50,338 Nope. 916 00:18:47,130 --> 00:18:50,338 I'm gonna have all of them. 917 00:18:50,421 --> 00:18:52,171 - Nope. I'm just gonna leave. 918 00:18:52,255 --> 00:18:55,130 Cam, the first step is the 919 00:18:52,255 --> 00:18:55,130 hardest, but it's worth it. 920 00:18:55,213 --> 00:18:57,796 It takes time to work through 921 00:18:55,213 --> 00:18:57,796 family issues. 922 00:18:57,880 --> 00:18:59,880 Yeah, she's right. Some people 923 00:18:57,880 --> 00:18:59,880 spend their whole lives 924 00:18:59,963 --> 00:19:01,921 trying to resolve 925 00:18:59,963 --> 00:19:01,921 these things. 926 00:19:02,005 --> 00:19:04,713 What would I ... 927 00:19:02,005 --> 00:19:04,713 What would I even say to her? 928 00:19:04,796 --> 00:19:08,421 That my dad left for a year 929 00:19:04,796 --> 00:19:08,421 with the town floozy 930 00:19:08,505 --> 00:19:10,171 and I thought he was off 931 00:19:08,505 --> 00:19:10,171 being a war hero 932 00:19:10,255 --> 00:19:11,380 and that I'm an idiot 933 00:19:11,463 --> 00:19:13,421 and ... and that I'm never 934 00:19:11,463 --> 00:19:13,421 gonna forgive him? 935 00:19:13,505 --> 00:19:15,921 I don't care that he came ... 936 00:19:13,505 --> 00:19:15,921 came back to us. 937 00:19:16,005 --> 00:19:18,505 He lied to me, and he let me 938 00:19:16,005 --> 00:19:18,505 grow up thinking my mama 939 00:19:18,588 --> 00:19:21,546 was the most important thing 940 00:19:18,588 --> 00:19:21,546 to him in the world. 941 00:19:21,630 --> 00:19:23,838 He's a phony. 942 00:19:23,921 --> 00:19:26,296 You know, maybe, 943 00:19:23,921 --> 00:19:26,296 you know, he did do the best 944 00:19:26,380 --> 00:19:28,671 he ... he knew how, 945 00:19:26,380 --> 00:19:28,671 you know? 946 00:19:28,755 --> 00:19:33,296 He always did make me feel safe 947 00:19:28,755 --> 00:19:33,296 and ... and happy. 948 00:19:34,755 --> 00:19:36,713 Maybe he was 949 00:19:34,755 --> 00:19:36,713 just trying to protect me, 950 00:19:36,796 --> 00:19:39,296 because he did love me 951 00:19:36,796 --> 00:19:39,296 with all of his heart, 952 00:19:39,380 --> 00:19:42,380 and, actually, 953 00:19:39,380 --> 00:19:42,380 I feel like I know him, 954 00:19:42,463 --> 00:19:46,713 like, even better now 955 00:19:42,463 --> 00:19:46,713 and love him even more. 956 00:19:46,796 --> 00:19:48,671 I am the person I am 957 00:19:48,755 --> 00:19:51,671 because of 958 00:19:48,755 --> 00:19:51,671 all my experiences. 959 00:19:51,755 --> 00:19:54,713 And I like me. 960 00:19:54,796 --> 00:19:58,880 And I have a daddy 961 00:19:54,796 --> 00:19:58,880 to thank for that. 962 00:19:58,963 --> 00:20:00,755 Whew. Ooh! 963 00:20:00,838 --> 00:20:03,088 Hey! That felt great. 964 00:20:03,171 --> 00:20:04,921 Oh, my gosh. 965 00:20:03,171 --> 00:20:04,921 I feel healed. 966 00:20:05,005 --> 00:20:06,921 Yeah, well, it's a good start, 967 00:20:05,005 --> 00:20:06,921 but therapy really is a ... 968 00:20:07,005 --> 00:20:09,838 No, no, no, no, no, no. 969 00:20:07,005 --> 00:20:09,838 That was extraordinary. 970 00:20:09,921 --> 00:20:12,755 I have never seen 971 00:20:09,921 --> 00:20:12,755 anything like that. 972 00:20:12,838 --> 00:20:14,630 He doesn't need me. 973 00:20:14,713 --> 00:20:15,838 Here. 974 00:20:15,921 --> 00:20:18,505 Have a hard candy 975 00:20:15,921 --> 00:20:18,505 and a good life. 976 00:20:18,588 --> 00:20:21,713 Wait, wait, wait, wait. 977 00:20:18,588 --> 00:20:21,713 He's done? No, no. 978 00:20:21,796 --> 00:20:24,463 Okay, I have ... I have been 979 00:20:21,796 --> 00:20:24,463 coming here for 10 years, 980 00:20:24,546 --> 00:20:26,713 and I am just barely 981 00:20:24,546 --> 00:20:26,713 scratching the surface. 982 00:20:26,796 --> 00:20:28,296 You call him extraordinary. 983 00:20:28,380 --> 00:20:31,255 Meanwhile, I've been pouring out 984 00:20:28,380 --> 00:20:31,255 my soul to you every week, 985 00:20:31,338 --> 00:20:34,505 and I get ... boop ... nothing. 986 00:20:34,588 --> 00:20:37,338 Mitchell, I did clear out 987 00:20:34,588 --> 00:20:37,338 the full hour. 988 00:20:37,421 --> 00:20:39,171 If you'd like to ... 989 00:20:39,255 --> 00:20:40,796 That would be great, 990 00:20:39,255 --> 00:20:40,796 Doctor. Thank you so much. 991 00:20:40,880 --> 00:20:41,921 I would love that. 992 00:20:40,880 --> 00:20:41,921 - Mm-hmm. 993 00:20:42,005 --> 00:20:44,921 Cam, I will see you at home. 994 00:20:42,005 --> 00:20:44,921 Okay, okay. 995 00:20:45,630 --> 00:20:47,213 - You chose the right one. 996 00:20:45,630 --> 00:20:47,213 - I'm waiting! 997 00:20:50,463 --> 00:20:52,463 You sure do know 998 00:20:50,463 --> 00:20:52,463 how to hide, buddy. 999 00:20:52,546 --> 00:20:54,755 I'm looking everywhere. 1000 00:20:54,838 --> 00:20:56,880 (golf game 1001 00:20:54,838 --> 00:20:56,880 plays on television) 1002 00:20:56,963 --> 00:20:59,921 Nope. 1003 00:20:56,963 --> 00:20:59,921 Not under the pool table. 1004 00:21:00,005 --> 00:21:02,796 Where, oh where, could you be? 1005 00:21:02,880 --> 00:21:04,671 Manny, 1006 00:21:02,880 --> 00:21:04,671 I am very busy. 1007 00:21:04,755 --> 00:21:06,296 Can't this wait? 1008 00:21:04,755 --> 00:21:06,296 - I've waited 10 years. 1009 00:21:06,380 --> 00:21:09,296 This is happening. Sit. 1010 00:21:06,380 --> 00:21:09,296 - Hey, I'm watching something. 1011 00:21:09,380 --> 00:21:10,588 Yes, you are! 1012 00:21:10,671 --> 00:21:13,796 Presenting 1013 00:21:10,671 --> 00:21:13,796 "Rhapsody in Ribbon." 1014 00:21:16,171 --> 00:21:17,963 You're it. I'm hiding. 1015 00:21:19,005 --> 00:21:23,130 One, two, three, 1016 00:21:23,213 --> 00:21:26,755 four, five, six... 1017 00:21:29,588 --> 00:21:32,255 Captions by VITAC :